#companion tav questions

[astralprisms]

Companion Tav Ask : Lots of questions ik, but I'm very curious. I'm sure you know that by now HAHA!

General 1, 9, 11

Story specific 1, 11, 14

Romance 1, if yes 7

12, Free space!

Hello Barnabas! Charl beat you to some of these, so the ones I've already answered for Xa'rok I will answer for Skaro instead (if applicable, because honestly Skaro is more of a tie-in companion to Xa'rok's story than a solo companion in his own right). Actually, in the case of companion!Xa'rok, it makes more sense to treat them as a pair whose stories are linked, since Xa'rok wouldn't have the same intimate connection to the Emperor as they do as a tav.

Companion!Tav questions

General

Where can your Tav be recruited?  Are they first encountered on the Nautiloid, or in the Nautiloid crash region?  Or are they not recruitable until a later act?

Already answered this for Xa'rok here

You would only learn about Skaro in Act 1 if you go to the creche and read the tir'su slates that mention the Proclamation of the Two Skies. Xa'rok would have reactionary dialogue, "Githzerai, huh?" and you could press on them for more information. Information revealed depends on Xa'rok's approval rating with the player character (Low: brief githyanki history lesson on the schism only; Medium: the ability to ask follow-up questions, such as "What are they like?" and "Have you ever met one?"; High: Xa'rok will actually answer that last question, along with teasing the fact that we might run into this githzerai down the line.)

Skaro will appear in your camp the night following the night Voss visits after the creche (showing up the same night would end poorly for him). The player character would wake to raised voices and find Xa'rok exchanging tense words with another gith. Given the context, it's easy to assume this gith is one of Vlaakith's agents, but then why didn't the Qua'nith detector sound the alarm? The player character is given the choice to ask the newcomer to explain their presence or to attack outright. If the player chooses to attack, Xa'rok will intervene on Skaro's behalf and offer introductions.

Skaro is the githzerai Xa'rok spoke of, a close friend, traveling companion, and potential ally. They had been separated for a time, pursuing different avenues of a shared goal when Xa'rok went missing. Skaro had been searching for them. Skaro has not been tadpoled, but while Xa'rok is unconcerned and even curious about the process, Skaro offers to join up and help search for a cure together and keep an eye on Xa'rok.

If you don’t go to the creche/interact with the slates, you would encounter him in the illithid colony at Moonrise. He would greet Xa’rok warmly, with a hug, and say, “I had a feeling you would end up here.” He would then join your party.

9. Does your Tav have any escalating conflicts with one of the other companions, like Lae’zel and Shadowheart’s knife-fight?

Already answered this for Xa'rok here

Independently, Skaro would also fight with Lae'zel on the matter of going to the creche. Mainly because, whatever his personal feelings, walking willingly into a conclave of his peoples' enemies is tantamount to suicide. But in the resulting fallout you would uncover that he is a githzerai, not a githyanki, and likely get some reactivity from Lae'zel about this. Presumably she knows enough about the githzerai to be able to distinguish among them on sight, but I would chalk her not noticing until then up to either her personal inexperience and a small lack in her erudite education, or Skaro's reticence about revealing his own personal information unless necessary.

Jointly with Xa'rok, Skaro would probably not get along with Lae'zel due to prejudice, and his own self-righteousness would probably rub some of the companions the wrong way, but only if it were a matter where they disagreed. Otherwise his calm and self-assurance would probably be a steadying presence. Skaro is very much a "mind your business and I'll mind mine" sort of person, so unless someone else is instigating trouble, he wouldn't go out of his way to start any fights. He's far older than most of the companions and would in all likelihood find their quarrels petty and bothersome and simply choose to not engage.

11. Are there any moments in the game that trigger unique dialogue for your character? (Like Gale’s anecdote about the barfight after you save the goblin prisoner) 

I feel like Xa'rok would have a lot of idle banter much like the rest of the companions, but specific cutscene dialogue? Hmm. If you recruit them at the crash site before encountering/interacting with the injured mindflayer they would have dialogue afterwards that differs depending on how the player chooses to navigate that situation but gives the player a glimpse of their specific interest in illithids.

After the first Guardian dream (the one they all share), Xa'rok is introspective and curious but evasive in their answers as they work through the dream (they would see Skaro, and on a joint companion run this would be slightly more troubling than reassuring).

If Gale dies prematurely and you trigger his elaborate resurrection ritual, Xa'rok will have something to say about the first time they confronted not their own mortality but the mortality of others also alongside an instrument - a little peek into their past. Higher approval will give you more chances to ask further questions about this in future.

If they are in your party when you confront the Guardian at the creche and first step into the astral plane. They would sigh with longing and express a desire for a continued existence on this plane, at some point in the future.

A comical dialogue about impulsive choices will prompt: if the player character gets the brand of the Absolute, sticks their hand in the weird centipede hole in the underdark (or the wall in Moonrise), gives Araj their blood (the first or second time), or drinks Araj's weird potion. If the player character elects to get either of the eye surgeries, this dialogue can also prompt, but Xa'rok will wince and say, "In this case, I'm glad you beat me to it."

Walking into the creche and interacting with them after will trigger a brief introspective that, with high enough approval, will get them to reveal their exile to the player. Likewise, speaking to the egg hunter lady will prompt at least a leading dialogue about the Society of Brilliance.

Meeting Omeluum will prompt a scene, as Xa'rok was on their way to meet with it before they got snatched by the Nautiloid. They have much to discuss.

Interacting with the githzerai brain in the moonrise colony will prompt a scene (context dependent on whether this is a solo companion run with Xa'rok, or a joint one with Skaro) with additional potential dialogue between Xa'rok and Lae'zel if Lae'zel is also present.

They would definitely have something to say after the Emperor reveal (again context dependent, though if unattached and the option is closed to the player, Xa'rok will sleep with the Emperor)

Story

How does your Tav advise the player character when it comes to the Dream Visitor?

They encourage the player to hear them out – there is logic to the thought of using the powers to increase their chances of survival, and they’ll lean in that direction if the player character is resistant to the idea of using the tadpoles. If the player character is open to the thought of using the tadpoles, they’ll encourage you to join them on that path and see where it takes you.

If the player has high approval with Xa’rok before the dreams zero in on just you, you can roll an insight check after the second dream to gauge their reaction to the visitor as a whole, and if you pass you get the sense that Xa’rok enjoys these visitations and takes some measure of comfort in them.

11. What do they say if the PC tries to force them to go up on stage with Dribbles the Clown?

“You can’t be serious.” / “I’m a performer, not a performance. Please pick someone else.” / “Fine. But I’ll remember this, and so will my flute.”

14. How does Tav react to the PC becoming a mind flayer?  Can they offer to become one themselves?  Does their reaction change if they’re romanced? 

Very positively, with stirrings of curiosity and a fair bit of jealousy. They would offer to take the player character’s place similar to Karlach, and you would be presented with the option to choose to evolve them in your stead. If declined they would insist on accompanying the player to the end and be supportive, promising to withhold their questions until after you’ve defeated the brain. N/A to romance as they cannot be romanced, but in theory they would not only be in favor, but suggest they could become illithid together, should the player want that.  

Romance

Is your Tav a romanceable character?  Are there any specific requirements to romancing them?

No, sorry. Xa’rok has two hands and they’re both occupied. The requirements for romancing them are: be one of their given partners already. They’re actually aroace, which makes it funnier they ended up with two relationships, but so am I and I get to choose the canon.

7. However, I did answer this one here! Since you can take this test with characters you aren’t romancing.

Unfortunately I don’t have a firm enough grasp on Skaro’s independent lore to answer this one for him yet. So no Skaro version for now.

[kapi-tanka]

having the time of my life in bg3 romancing shadowheart and i love love love my transmasc githyanki rogue/fighter tav (conveniently named tavish). he's so much fun to draw and to play as, just can't get my hands off him

[catsharky]

May I ask for some details about your Tav? What do you mean by hasnt really lived as a tiefling before? Like literally has never seen another tiefling? Seems like being abducted by the mindflayers introduced major life changes to your Tav

I'm sorry this took so long to answer, but I ended up doing a whole bunch of art to answer this!

Ember has a really extensive backstory that's kind of long, but the short version of it is: she was caught in the crossfire of a deal her parents made with a devil. They couldn't have a child of their own because her mother was too severely ill, so they made the deal in the hopes of returning her health and along with it the ability to bear children. Unfortunately devil deals being what they are, they ended up with Ember who the devil stole from her birth parents.

Her mom was a high elf and her dad a half-elf, and her mom's side of the family were quite vocally anti-Tiefling. Because of her mother's health problems, however, they couldn't just sever contact with her parents because they relied on their money to cover the cost of healers, expensive potion ingredients and the like. They couldn't be trusted not to be a threat to Ember though, so the decision was made to disguise her as their biological daughter throughout her childhood.

Here's an age chart!

As a result, Ember didn't even know she was a Tiefling until she was around 4 or 5, when she began to present as a sorcerer and accidentally undid the disguise spell (she ends up a bard thanks to her mom, but her control of magic comes from sorcery).

Before the events of the game, the most time she ever spent as a Tiefling was when she was 13- when her mom died and her dad disappeared, the disguise spell having relied on her mum's magic. She went through hell for a while after that and as soon as she could learn how to cast the spell herself, she jumped at the chance and went back to living as her old half-elf self. So when she gets taken by the Nautiloid, it's her being forced to actually live as her real self and as a Tiefling for the first time. As a result she doesn't have great control over her tail, because she's just straight up not used to having one.

She also spends a lot of Act 1 jumpscaring herself whenever she walks by a mirror lmao.

I do plan to do some comics that are set earlier in the game at some point, and those ones will explore more of her backstory. What I've done so far has just happened to be set in Act 3, after she's already sorted a lot of her shit out. I just have no idea when that'll actually be!

[forcedhesitation]

astarion origin playthrough worth it just for all the extra moments where he does the "sad wet cat" face

[imageingrunge]

mama <3

[spiderwarden]

Larian let companions yell at Tav when they disrespect and break their boundaries challenge.

[intheinkpot]

[zodiacsea]

actually obsessed with the way astarion & halsin handled the whole negotiating romancing them both. chef’s kiss

[rtnortherly]

Zilvra and Rhuna meeting the Blade of Frontiers together—it’s a good thing the ever nosey and sociable Rhuna invited herself along on Zilvra’s adventure is travelling with Zilvra, or else Zilvra would not be interacting with the plot much at all 😂

[moinsbienquekaworu]

If I didn't already have multiple drawings I want to finish I'd start a series of Constant interacting with their companions. I already have ideas and everything!!

[astralprisms]

General 1, 9

Story 6, 8

Romance 7, 9

Companion!Tav asks

General

Where can your Tav be recruited?  Are they first encountered on the Nautiloid, or in the Nautiloid crash region?  Or are they not recruitable until a later act?

Xa'rok could first be encountered on the Nautiloid moving around between the room with those hivemind chairs and the tutorial chest and the room where you first encounter Us. In the case of the first they would have a reaction dialogue to the player character when the player sits in the chair and expresses hearing voices.

"Yes! It's connecting us, all of us, to the ship itself. Remarkable, isn't it? It really is alive."

They would be sitting somewhere across the room from the player in another chair but within eyesight and you could either try speaking to them through the tadpole link (heightened by the hivemind) or walk up and initiate conversation.

In the case of the latter they would be found tucked in the corner with the qualith slates and move around the room, inspecting everything. spouting idle dialogue relevant to the slates' contents along with wonder at being able to comprehend them. If interrupted they would brush the player off with "Not now, I'm busy." "Come back later." "Less talking, can't you see I'm reading? Well, not exactly reading..."

In either case they wouldn't actually be recruitable until you find them again on the beach among the wreckage. They could be found wandering the whole of the crash site, observing and lamenting the loss of what they hadn't had a chance to study. If you don't interact with/recruit them then, they would appear later at the creche down on the cliffside back entrance. You would run into them picking the lock on the door and could initiate conversation there. If the player is not a gith and there are no gith in the party, they would offer to be the party's ambassador and lead them through the creche safely. If the player character is a gith or you have Lae'zel in your party, they would defer to the player's judgement/let the player lead, but act a little cagey (haven't been to a creche since their exile and they are unsure what to expect, fighting both a weird sense of sonder and an instinctive recoil, but the player would not get any of this information until approval develops, which could happen easily as they explore the creche provided you do so without inciting violence as an opening salvo).

9. Does your Tav have any escalating conflicts with one of the other companions, like Lae’zel and Shadowheart’s knife-fight?

Xa'rok and Lae'zel would likely start out fine until Lae'zel spent enough time with them to realize how 'sympathetic' they are to the ghaik and how unresistant they are to both the tadpoles, and the concept of their infection. It wouldn't turn into an actual fight (at least not in the first act), but depending on the player choices (desire to engage with tadpoles etc), there may be a cutscene where Lae'zel and Xa'rok exchange tense words and Lae'zel threatens Xa'rok similarly to how she threatens the player just before the first Guardian dream: that whatever their sympathies and preferences, should Xa'rok complete ceremorphosis within earshot/eyesight of Lae'zel, she wouldn't hesitate to kill them.

This tension balloons up and down as the story progresses, especially if you keep both Xa'rok and Lae'zel in your party at the same time during specific points (namely, the creche and resulting fallout, and meeting the Emperor/the honor guard fight at the top of act 3)

Xa'rok implicitly trusts the Guardian and later champions the Emperor, which obviously leads to tension with Lae'zel over Orpheus. (They are, however, all for infiltrating the House of Hope and should both Lae'zel and Xa'rok be together in the party when the player makes the decision to open the portal, there would be idle banter about their goals in going. Xa'rok would make it clear they have no intention of taking the Hammer and only intend to put Raphael in his place, but they would approve of freeing Hope)

I suppose it depends on player choices as to whether Lae'zel and Xa'rok ever come to blows over their divisive goals, actually. I hate to step in on Shadowheart's feud but given how in opposition their allegiances seem, it would maybe come down to dialogue choices and/or persuasion/deception rolls to avoid an actual fight later in the game. To add salt to the wounds, Xa'rok would actually get along well with Shadowheart.

Story

6. Will they stay with the Player Character regardless of siding with the goblins or the tieflings, or is it possible for them to leave the party permanently?

They would approve of any diplomatic/persuasive/deceptive/non-combative means of resolving conflict, but ultimately the tiefling/goblin feud is not personal and the outcome has little bearing on their relation to the player. They would disapprove of massacring the Grove on principle (choice words about alternative solutions spoken) but doing so wouldn't result in them leaving.

Part of me wants to say they would treat the conflict as a trial run for their own diplomatic powers of persuasion/future plans, but there's no real way to navigate that situation without killing one side, so it'd be an ultimate lose/lose. I think as a response, though, this would leave them very introspective and maybe a little maudlin at the party.

8. Do they have comments on who the Player Character chooses to spend the night with? 

They are a bard and like to gossip, but it would depend on their relation/approval with the player character and their relationship to the character the player slept with.

Low approval/Low Relation: "Hmm. Not who I would have gone with."

Medium approval/Medium Relation: "Interesting choice. Not sure who it says more about, you or (him/her)."

High approval/High relation: "You and (companion) disappeared awful quickly. Anything interesting to tell?"

Romance

7. What questions can Zethino ask the PC about Tav in the Love Test? 

"What, to them, is Xa'rok's life's purpose?" (Answer: To be an instrument for unity, cooperation, and change in shedding the shackles of the past for a new future.)

"The gith speaks often, and well, but how much of what they say is true?" (Answer: As much as needs to be. They are not above using their natural charm for their own ends.)

"Xa'rok - What calls to them the loudest?" (Answer: the unending song of the Astral sea.)

9. How do they react if the PC has sex with Mizora? The Emperor?  Haarlep?

Mizora: Wary confusion. A little disgusted. (After Raphael, they can't stand fiends) "Really? Her? Lured in by a false tongue. Feeling any different this morning? Less...intact? Soul-wise, I mean."

The Emperor: They would be one of the ones to stumble in on you but they wouldn't react with disgust. They would stare. Hungrily. Curious. If the Emperor didn't wipe everyone's minds of the encounter, or the player mentioned it in passing, they would have soooo many questions you very quickly get the sense that they're jealous (of the encounter, not personally) and also really interested. Similar sort of dialogue tree to asking Karlach about fighting in the Hells, but they will scientifically interrogate you about your sexual encounter.

Haarlep: Polite disinterest. No particular commentary. Except perhaps to disparage Raphael. They would disapprove though once Haarlep's game manifested in the real world as a consequence. Gross.

[themadlu]

Hi! 6, 20 and 32 relationship ask!

Hi - thanks for the request @spacebarbarianweird!

Here are answers for my three OCs and their poor, poor sweet&sour halves (well, two and a half, the last one needs some brainstorming still).

Zélie x Astarion

Zélie is a human martial artist (so basically a less religious monk) from Earth who gets kidnapped by the mindflayers and winds up in Faerun. She is extremely no-nonsense and can't deal with poor behaviour, so obviously she and Astarion will have a great time since their first meeting.

6. Who holds a grudge the longest?

Zel. She's like an elephant, she doesn't forget. It's great because she can always recall the good times, but she also has a mental black notebook of those who crossed her. It does take a pretty big offence to end up there though.

20. Who's more likely to get into a bar fight?

Astarion. He'd start it and enjoy witnessing the ensuing mayhem while Zel shoots him her death glare.

32. Who's the first to apologize?

Zel. Astarion is learning, but his "sorry" still sounds like a dying frog's ribbit.

Chiyo x Aradin

Chiyo is a half-drow (and something else) monk/cleric (still on probation, Bahamut is debating) from the Monastery of the Yellow Rose in the Earthspur Mountains of Damara, the very North of Faerun. She tries to live an ascetic and peaceful life, but even her diplomatic skills crumble when met with a certain punchable face. I know, "but Aradin is a prejudiced prick!" yeah well, so are Lae'zel, Astarion and 90% of the NPCs. It'll develop here, I promise.

6. Who holds a grudge the longest?

Aradin. Not for years, and he'll learn to let things go eventually, but he's still a hothead. Chiyo won't get extremely mad or vengeful, but she will remember who slighted her or her dear ones.

20. Who's more likely to get into a bar fight?

Both. Aradin because he's a hothead and can't keep his mouth shut, Chiyo because she grew up in a monastery in the mountains and she's still learning how wider society works and what triggers people. She will say the wrong thing to the wrong guy from time to time. Good thing they both pack a good punch.

32. Who's the first to apologize?

Chiyo. She was raised to respect her seniors and those around her, and she is a stickler for following the rules (most of the time). Though apologising to Aradin takes a lot of self-control. He is still learning to admit his mistakes, like Astarion.

Fuji x Rolan

Fuji is a drow who found life in Underdark society so restrictive and boring she ran away at age 15 (very young for a drow) to try her luck in the outside world. She became a College of Swords bard, though her unruly behaviour saw her kicked out in her final year of studies. Much to her dismay, the propensity for the divine typical of her people caught up with her and she was kind of forced into becoming a cleric after accidentally offending a certain god. Yes, Rolan is in good hands (mostly).

6. Who holds a grudge the longest?

Rolan. Though he's improving a lot since finding more stability as an archmage. Fuji is way too brain-scattered to remember who did what for long. Though she would use her drow charm to scare the living hell out of those who annoy her.

20. Who's more likely to get into a bar fight?

Fuji. She loves a good brawl. She'd start it by pitting two poor souls against each other and happily play her drum along as a cinematic soundtrack to add pathos. Rolan learnt to always cast mage armour before going to taverns with her.

32. Who's the first to apologize?

Rolan. He still regrets behaving so horribly with Fuji for most of their early weeks, and his temper, whilst improving, is still a bit fiery. So he is super aware of Fuji's reaction and of what he does that may cause her distress (he'd rather go back to Avernus than hurt her again).

[argetcross]

I did this BG3 Tav interview meme from twitter for Keres!

[agent-jaselin]

thinking of doing a couple comics with Reith. One is boarded out just silly, Halsin being oblivious to hints they are his kid.

The other more serious Reith getting tossed into the bear cage and them escaping a little early. And maybe Reith having to explain why they've been lying to Halsin.

Also need to actually like. Draw Tav XD and maybe make Reith younger? both cause head-canon about elf families that made me sad from ride-a-dromedary since apparently lore has age eleven be when they stop being parented more directly by the birth parents and spread out more among the rest of the group so Halsin would miss the entire traditional bonding window in a way. But Also cause I want them to be closer to age to Yenna and the other kids and based on Oliver they are like, eight instead of 12.

There was a party member in Final Fantasy 9 who was like. 5 so I'm allowed.

[thats-a-lot-of-cortisol]

companion!tav questions

General 3, 11

Story 8, 17

Romance 7

for Diodore! (I love that name it's fun to say)

Ooh, several questions! This'll be a bit of a long one lol (and thank you!!)

General:

3. Does she have any comments or advice when you recruit other companions?

Shadowheart: "It's not...common for a cleric to obscure their deity. I suppose I can't begrudge her commitment to secrecy."

Lae'zel: "She reminds me of my aunt... I'm not sure how I feel about that."

Astarion: "Gods, rogues [eye roll]. His dagger skills had better match his audacity."

Gale: "...Is that what all wizards are like topside?"

Wyll: "I can respect an idealist. We need someone to bring up the mood around here."

Karlach: "Oh...oh my. [Clears throat] She seems nice!"

Halsin: I can't for the life of me think of a specific line but it would be something trying (and failing) to keep cool and not show how excited she is about him officially joining the team lol. She'd be asking him a lot of questions about Surface flora and fauna in the "walking around" random dialogue.

Minthara: "She may not be a thrall of the Absolute anymore, but that doesn't mean we should bare our backs to her. Tread carefully."

Jaheira: "[Whispers] Am I supposed to recognize her? Did I miss something?"

Minsc: "Some people have a devil on their shoulder, some have a rodent. I guess."

11. Are there any moments in the game that trigger unique dialogue for her?

A few things might:

She would have a couple lines wondering why a Baenre would join the Absolute after you meet Minthara.

She talks about remembering her father mention the Society of Brilliance after you meet them in the Underdark.

She reacts...a bit badly when you meet Karn'iss and explains her own fears about becoming a drider if you talk to her afterwards, as long as your approval is high enough (moderate or higher). If you didn't get certain details in Act I, you would get them at that point.

(idk if this is what the question meant? But uh hopefully I covered it.)

Story:

8. Does she have comments on who Tav chooses to spend the night with?

For sure. For low-normal approval, she'd make a snarky comment about it and move on quickly. For moderate & higher approval she'll ask about it in an attempt to be supportive ("this is what friends do, right? This is what bonding looks like?") but if you try and give her details she gets embarrassed and backs off.

17. If romanced, how does she react to the Dark Urge trying to kill her in Act 2?

Pausing for a moment to process wtf is happening and then getting very matter-of-fact. She'd talk them through it logically, trying to keep them grounded, except for the last bit before the last saving throw, where she'd accidentally show how scared and concerned she is for them. She would very purposefully place a hand on their shoulder, arm, etc. throughout to try and reach them and show that she's not scared of them (whether or not that's true). Durge would get her Aura of Protection bonuses on their saving throws. Lots of "hey, hey, look at me"-s.

Romance:

7. What questions can Zethino ask Tav about her in the Love Test?

I'm assuming this means from the pre-existing bank of questions she asks from? I got these from the love test ask game/master post(?) that veilkeeper posted.

What, if anything, do they miss most about their home?

When they die, what will be their legacy?

What is the worst thing they've ever done?

Typically, she would approve of honest, straight-forward answers and disapprove of answers that are clearly flattery or that she views as being too sugar-coated.

The questions are from this ask game!

[socialmediasocrates]

1, 4, and 5 for the general asks 🙏

Talking companion!Tav. Thanks @seasteading ur a real one <3

Balalafay is the paladin in the heavy armor; Mayeari is the one with the pumpkin hair. She'd be an artificer if Larian weren't COWARDS.

Where can your Tav be recruited?  Are they first encountered on the Nautiloid, or in the Nautiloid crash region?  Or are they not recruitable until a later act?

Balalafay: Lala is recruitable once you've reached the Grove! She has a couple different recruitment possibilities depending on how many long rests you've taken, though. If you reach the Grove before your first long rest, she will be just north of its entrance, sitting on a rock while she tries to get her bearings after the crash. She wanders further away each long rest, though, and will eventually find her way to Waukeen's Rest after the third, where she can be recruited after helping to rescue Florrick. If recruited on the second long rest, she'll be found along the Risen Road picking flowers.

Mayeari: Mayeari is recruitable in the mountains. She will be encountered running from the undead and can be recruited as a camp follower after combat has concluded. If it takes more than 4 turns to defeat the undead, you'll get a special scene where she casts Call Lightning centered on herself to accomplish it (probably don't hang out near her during combat). If Balalafay is in the party when you first encounter Mayeari, you'll get a special scene where the two of them snipe at each other. Mayeari will become a fully available companion once you reach the Underdark, and will randomly upgrade pieces of equipment during long rests from that point onward.

What sort of general actions raise or lower their approval?

Balalafay: She approves of generally kind and compassionate actions and open-mindedness. You can specifically gain a lot of approval from her by being understanding and sympathetic in your dealings with the tieflings and by being kind to the other companions. Her mother always says that curiosity is a prerequisite for power, and Lala believes this with her whole heart. You'll gain approval for taking investigation prompts and lose it for ignoring them. Close-mindedness and cruelty are quick ways to make her not like you, and she will become very cross if you're hyper-critical of her. She also despises intolerance toward her fellow drow and extorting the weak.

Mayeari: Is a fucking freak. You'll have a special dialogue after the first time you thank her for doing something wherein she'll tell you she's allergic to gratitude, and after that thanking Mayeari for anything will net a loss of approval. She likes to needle Balalafay but will disapprove if you join her in doing so. Like Balalafay, she values open-mindedness and curiosity, unlike Balalafay she gets annoyed when you do stupid, potentially dangerous things like licking a dead spider. An easy way to net positive approval from Mayeari is to acquire materials for her to improve your gear with from shopping lists she'll occasionally provide you with. She has a soft spot for children and animals and will always approve of kindness to them.

Are there any instances where your Tav can permanently leave the party, depending on player character actions?

Balalafay: If she's been recruited by the time you deal with the goblins and you decide to raid the grove, she will turn on you. She'll go as far as challenging you or Minthara to a one-on-one duel. She can also leave the party in Act 3 depending on your interactions with her during the final leg of her companion questline, and will side with Jaheira against you if you kill Isobel in Act 2. Regardless of approval or player behavior, she will briefly leave the party at the very end of Act 2 to have a conversation with [REDACTED] about [REDACTED] but she will return while you're camped at Wyrm's Rock.

Mayeari: If you harm a child she will leave the party immediately. You can technically ask her to leave at any time; if you have high approval with her, she'll try to talk it out with you, otherwise she'll be gone come morning following a long rest. Mayeari will briefly leave the party regardless of what you do in early Act 3, but she'll return on her own after two long rests. She will also leave the party if Balalafay does at any of the points where that can happen.