#christa wolf

[petaltexturedskies]

Christa Wolf, from Cassandra: A Novel and Four Essays

[darkpoetryshop]

Cannibalism is a metaphor for love

[sinligh]

You seek approval,

my subconscious implemented in my dreams. you build up illusions of yourself

and like a bridge thread of a spider web you give them to others

silky, sticky yet somehow,

you’re smooth enough to lure them to wrap you in all that you desire,

even if it’s their own pleasure.

you’re not stuck you’re waiting, for an ending or a beginning

an unsolicited death, an indefinite life

you fear your own madness but the edge of it is what you live for.

you wait, and wait and wait for love to visit the fragile home you made for yourself in this temporary world

but it’s not what you want, is it ?

because the moment it knocks on your door you rush to the arms of another,

paranoia or melancholy? It doesn’t matter.

you writhe and hiss until you shed a skin of a past life that you held on

For acceptance alone, if nothing else…

what is it that you truly desire?

•••

• Quotes: Susan Sontag/ Edgar Allan Poe/ Emily Dickinson/ Halsey/ Sylvia Plath/ Christa Wolf.

• Original context: Sinligh

• Art reference:

1. Art by Edward Burne-Jones. 2. Art from Sedmikrasky (Daisies). 3. Dave McKean, "Sandman" graphic novel. 4. Art by Roberto Ferri. 5. Painting by William Oxer. 6. Craww's "Woven".

[asoftepiloguemylove]

i think my body is falling in pieces i think my blood is passing me by

Micah Nemerever These Violent Delights / I.B. Vyache Excerpt 07.01.21 / Silas Denver Melvin excerpt from Grit: A Poetry Collection / Christa Wolf excerpt from Cassandra: A Novel and Four Essays / Ethel Cain Family Tree (Intro) / unknown / Fiona Apple Left Alone / Richard Siken The Worm King's Lullaby / Gwen Benaway Holy Wild

i. Micah Nemerever, These Violent Nights

[ "I don't think you've ever felt anything that didn't hurt you. / We've found each other, out of everyone else in the world. Does that hurt, too?" ]

ii. I.B. Vyache, Excerpt 07.01.21

[ "It's time to forgive my hands for being hands. I'm going to hate myself a little less tomorrow. I'm going to hate myself a little less tomorrow." ]

iii. unknown

[ "have you shot a gun? is your blood authentic? is your blood authentic? is your blood authentic? can you prove it to me?" ]

iv. Christa Wolf, Cassandra: A Novel and Four Essays

[ "You looked at me / (did you still see me?)" ]

v. Ethel Cain, Family Tree (Intro)

[ "The fate's already fucked me sideways / Swinging by my neck from the family tree / He'll laugh and say, 'You know I raised you better than this' / Then leave me hanging so they all can laugh at me" ]

vi. unknown

[ "I fight. I resist. It doesn't even matter what I resist; there is simply something in me that tends to resist things as they are. I have been fighting since I was very small." ]

vii. Fiona Apple, Left Alone

[ "[Chorus] / How can I ask anyone to love me / When all I do is beg to be left alone?" ]

viii. Richard Siken, The Worm King's Lullaby

[ "Someone has to leave first. This is a very old story. There is no other version of this story." ]

ix. Gwen Benaway, Holy Wild

[ "I am tired of explaining the fire, / it burns because it must." ]

[mournfulroses]

Yes, I like being able to hold on to something forever, no matter how small it is.

Christa Wolf, from "They Divided The Sky: A Novel," publ. in 1963

[psalmsofpsychosis]

And Without You;

// "Postcard from Gone", Leila Chatti / "Sweet the Sound", Clementine Von Radics / "You, Dr Martin", Anne Sexton / Solaris (1972) dir. Andrei Tarkovsky / "Casandra: A Novel And For Essays", Christa Wolf / Did You Forget Everything I'll Always Remember? – JacObAllTrades / Emily Dickinson, from a letter to Mary Bowles / “Know We Could Be So Happy Baby (If We Wanted To Be)", Jeff Buckley /

[dysphoresque]

Christa Wolf / Cassandra: A Novel and Four Essays // Andrei Tarkovsky / Solaris // Clementine von Radics / Sweet the Sound

[lillyli-74]

I was torn by an anguish that never left me, no matter what happened.

~Christa Wolf

[oldwinesoul]

“I felt there was no point in telling anyone anything that was happening inside me.”

// Christa Wolf, tr. by Jan van Heurck, “Cassandra: A Novel & Four Essays,”

[kimio7]

via. boymiffy || i knew i loved you when you showed me your minecraft world - hera lindsay bird || cassandra: a novel and four essays - christa wolf || honeybee - trista mateer || secrets from a girl (who’s seen it all) - lorde || wrong side of a fistfight - ashe vernon

[deadpoetneenzs]

[petaltexturedskies]

Christa Wolf, from "they divided the sky: a novel"

[darkpoetryshop]

I could not stop producing madness

-Cassandra, Christa Wolf

[sinligh]

High fences of realization built on the liquid like foundation of my murky soul.

My desire for love when kept untouched grew into resentment towards myself.

Soothed only by the hands of death on the base of my spine stitching me back together I, her only leftover with words of comfort.

"Life goes on". Is its construction mantra.

Out of deaths lips its arbitrary, a stolen promise; like all the souls that it deemed unfit to be renovated.

The hand of death on the base of my spine, on the back of my neck

it grounds me; I find comfort in it.

the way it caress me so lovingly, a threat of a postpartum psychotic mother to an oblivious child.

Death was never particularly appealing to me, it’s the thought of not existing

not now, not in the past, nor the future. to never be, with no trace whatsoever.

To cease to exist all together With no leftovers, nor broken lovers.

It’s not a constant desire, more of a lure, a forbidden love. A slow burn romance with a happy ending

One that I’ll never reach out to willingly but if it ever reached out to me then I know for sure that I’m not strong enough to reject it.

Because life loses its colors from time to time…

And that leaves me, like a person suffering from aphasia. I lose the ability to understand the point of it all…

I try hard to redefine everything, yet, I can’t express it not even when I reach for a semi-stable ground with all my words.

sensitive, i let life play me like an instrument, so responsive.

i increase the tone of whatever melody goes through me..

do it so i hurt anyone who loves me enough to listen. And because I can’t just fade…. And because I don’t have the upper hand…. I make sure to leave my mark, I make sure I have a way to I leave.

And then I choose not to.

•••

•Quotes: Christa Wolf / Joyce Carol Oates/ Sylvia Plath/Susan Sontag/ Virginia Woolf / Ocean Vuong / Molly Brodak/ Halsey

•Original context: Sinligh

•art reference:

1. Painting by John Bagnold Burgess (detail)

Painting by Roberto Ferri ( detail)

2. Painting by Émile Vernon (detail)

3. The Grasshopper by Jules Joseph Lefebvre. (detail)

4. Painting by Valeria Duca.

5. red" by Hei Shan.

6. Sleeping Beauty by William Oxer.

7. Halsey from her Ig post: iamhalsey (detail)

[asoftepiloguemylove]

on longing for love

Celeste Ng Little Fires Everywhere / Zeppelinmoon Waiting / Marina Tsvetaeva On Love / Alex G Sarah / pinterest / Christa Wolf (tr. Jan van Heurck) Cassandra: A Novel and Four Essays

[witchesroad]

LOTTIENAT in YELLOWJACKETS 2x07

cassandra: a novel and four essays by christa wolf / song of the simple truth: poems; “presence of love on the island” by julia de burgos / duino elegies; “the second elegy” by rainer maria wilke