#chester is being sarcastic

[small-spark-of-light]

i wanted to finish the alignment chart so heres more

[numetaljackdog]

1st saw movie is really good, its honestly sexoer having seen it. I wouldnt bother with the others just keep jacking off to the gifs

i havw to at least watch the first 3. but your input is greatly appreciated

[cyndrastic]

ok so y’all seemed to like the first part of the Fairly Odd Parents AU so here’s more characters!!

Tolkien and Jimmy are AJ and Chester!! They’re Clyde’s best (and only) friends at school! As I was making this au I realized how oddly well Tolkien and Jimmy actually match AJ and Chester character wise, so not much has to be changed for them honestly. Meanwhile I needed a character to be Vicky so I figured “hey Clyde has a sister doesn’t he?” so boom there she is.

more in depth character descriptions under the cut for those who want them!

Tolkien is the smart rich kid who tries and generally fails to talk sense into Jimmy and Clyde, and is the only one of the three with any brain cells. Also probably the only neurotypical one of the three. He’s also the only one in school who will point out when stuff randomly changes, usually in benefit of Clyde. Like, he’s the one who always notices when Clyde suddenly has a new super expensive looking bike, or he’s suddenly the most popular guy in school for like 3 days before everything just goes back to how it was for no reason. Tolkien is the only one who notices and is concerned with this.

These changes are obviously Clyde making wishes, and it scares Tweek that Tolkien will eventually figure out that Clyde has fairy god parents. Tweek wants to wipe Tolkien’s memory every time he notices a spell, but Clyde and Craig stop him. Craig thinks it’s hilarious because in all his time being a godparent, no godkid’s friends have ever noticed anything wrong until Tolkien, so he’s automatically Craig’s second favorite human (second to Clyde).

He rewards Tolkien for this by letting him be the only human that can hold or play with him when he’s in his pet form (like how Cosmo and Wanda become goldfish, Craig is a guinea pig) without getting bit when the trio hangs out at Clyde’s house.

Jimmy, for the sake of this au, will not be as dirt poor as Chester is in the actual show cause idk what good that does for this au lol. Otherwise Jimmy is the wisecracking friend who has a good heart and pure intentions most of the time but covers it with crude humor and kinda offensive jokes. Also he sucks at reading a room (me coded) and can never tell when his comedic genius won’t be appreciated (the deleted scene of him making a joke about Clyde killing his mom to Clyde like the day after it happened lives in my head rent free it’s so funny) His hair is also wavy cause I said so and that’s just how I like to draw Jimmy, i do what i want.

Also, just like how Tolkien is Craig’s second favorite human, Jimmy is Tweek’s. Most of the time when Jimmy cracks a joke, even if it’s a supremely unfunny one, Tweek laughs at it. Tweek’s pet form is a parrot, so that means if he’s chilling as an animal he can still talk and laugh. Jimmy thinks it’s hilarious that Clyde’s bird finds him so funny and Jimmy will frequently go to Clyde’s house to write and test out new comedy routines for Tweek because he’s “such a terrific audience.” Craig kinda hates it but won’t object because Tweek genuinely enjoys it.

Clyde and Craig don’t understand how Tweek finds Jimmy genuinely funny all the time, but it’s literally only because Tweek has spent the majority of his life around Craig, who is incredibly blunt, sarcastic to a fault, and so unfunny it hurts. Craig is only ever funny by being overtly honest when he doesn’t need to be (autism moment), and couldn’t make a normal joke if his life depended on it (if i may remind anyone of the Craig clip: “i got a good one: why do girls wear makeup and perfume? because they’re ugly and they stink” this man would not know a joke if it punched him in the face)

Lizzie is Clyde’s older sister. Shes a good bit older than him, Clyde being around 15 years old and her being around 22. She’s a massive bitch and has always been mean to Clyde, but it got worse once their mom died and she blamed it on Clyde (Betsy died the same way in canon as in this au, so it is kinda Clyde’s fault but still, he was 8). Luckily with her being way older than Clyde, she lives at college, but he has to deal with her whenever she goes home and during her school’s breaks. She takes Vicky’s role in this au so even if she isn’t an evil babysitter, she acts similarly to Clyde as Vicky does to Timmy.

She’s one of the reasons Clyde even gets god parents: abusive older sister, dead mom who’s death was because of him, crazy teacher (Garrison is his own level of traumatizing just as he is in the canon of the show but i haven’t decided if i wanted him to be exactly like Crocker yet), and Roger (Clyde’s dad) is ok but he’s kinda neglectful cause he’s mourning his wife and has to work double to support his kids now that Betsy is dead.

[skxllz]

{ 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐤𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐡 }

quotes; “ I showed up on your doorstep cause you're my uncle, asshole, not because I'm selling girl scout cookies. ”, “ did you really just ask if I'm a fucking junkie? ”

age; 20

sex; female

pronouns; she/her

alias; chester shepard

> the surname of her biological mother, used in manhattan - where she came from.

personality; quiet, isolated/introverted, awkwardly caring, sarcastic, playful, kind (for the most part)

likes; eating cherries and playing with the stems. reading forensic files online. playing uno online and in person. collecting trinkets and random things (dice, tiny collectables, etc). chewing on lollipop sticks. keeping money in her shoe for emergencies. smoking swishers. sucking on those creme mint candies. going to the park just to sit on the platforms of the play palace(?). riding bikes. hanging out at the L just because she's nosey and eavesdrops on everyone. riding in/on the back of the cart at the grocery store. goofing around in public places. writing poems when she's bored. sour candy. watching movies, sneaking into the movie theater.

dislikes; public transportation. green apples. arrogant people. feeling transparent/being ignored. her uncle. mickey (it's a love/hate relationship). being bothered when reading.

appearance; up top

additional information; she's sexually confused (bi curious). she has an older brother, wilson, and a little sister, amanda. out of all of the gallagher's she's closest with carl. her mother is deceased and her father got arrested, which is why she was sent to live with terry.

[therealpontius]

Just for tonight…

Plot: your 3yr long relationship ended abruptly, can it be saved?

Warnings: body shaming/ sickness/ cursing/ breakup/ loneliness/ no smut

This is pt1 it ended up being longer than i thought, im not sure if i like this so much but im exited to write pt2. FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED

Wordcount: 2.4k

Part 2

"Your supposed to be my boyfriend! You never stick up for me!" Was your last words to your boyfriend, bam, 6 years ago now. You bad been sitting in aprils living room with bam, showing him the pictures you took of him on your camera when his friends all came in, his arm that was wrapped around you was whipped back to his side before his friends where in sight "yo!" They collectively shout "hey fatties here!" Dico laughed. You where bigger, not alot but definitely not as small as them. You sarcastically laughed at his joke once and ever since hes been saying it thinking it amused you, bam knew other wise though but still laughed along. Raab sat playing with a heavy football, kicking it around the place. You tried to hold bams hand but he wormed his away from you "hey chub chub catch!" Raab shouted to you, you turned round just in time for it to hit your nose full force with a crunch "fuck!" Instead of helping you they all laughed, a stream of blood coming out your nose "bam help!" "I um..." "BAM HELP ME" you screamed, the boys continued laughing. You just ran to the door, holding your nose still."Your supposed to be my boyfriend! You never stick up for me!" You shouted slamming the door shut.

Three years gone like that. No calls. No texts. Nothing...

Now you where 21, had your own small apartment in delaware. You played electric guitar at a nearby pub every weekend. Eyes still silently searching crowds for him and you hated yourself for it, he didnt even care about you so why did you still care about him?

You where headed back to west chester to visit your parents, your mom had grown really ill. The journey was three hours long and you tried to distract yourself from the overwhelming tiredness with music, it was 9am. The streets became familiar as you neared your birth town, you had missed it more than imagined.

"Mom? Dad?" You asked, opening the front door to your childhood home "sweetie!" You dad welcomed you with a warm hug, something you havent felt in too long "cmon moms in the living room" he said, leading you by your shoulder. You where met with a frail and pale looking woman, nothing like the mom you once knew. Instead of freaking out infront of her you ran to give her a hug "sweetie, dont worry. Ive had a hell of a life" she spoke softly to lighten your mood  "i know mom i just wish i could do something to help you" "well..." she pulled away from you "you could pop to the shops, your dads too lazy" she laughed, rolling her eyes "sure thing! Write a list and ill head out as soon as"

You headed to the local aldi, the one with the skate park that you took loads of pictures of bam in. You ignored any thought of him, your here for your mom.  40 minutes later you where out the shop with four bags full. Looking back at the skate park on the small walk back to the car saddened you, the memories you had there, you spent more than half of your life there. "OH SHIT" you screamed, falling on your side. You had been hit by something and you werent sure what but all you knew was that the laughs that now surrounded you where painfully familiar "oh fuck! Dude are you okay?" Oh shit.. thats bam. You kept your head on the ground hoping it would just suck you in "um yeah im fine" you sat up, seeing all the boys you once grew up with gather your groceries and bam holding his hand out to you "look we are filming a show, ill pay you in cash for any hassle is that okay?" What the fuck was he on about, he didnt even recognised you. You face flushed as he held your hand, pulling you up "hey is that fattie?" Dico says making all the boys squint at you "holy shit... chub chub..." raab gasps "yeah, you found me out" you laughed awkwardly, hands coming up in fake surrender. Bam stood, jaw open slightly "well it was good seeing you!" You said, taking you bags back, a big hand grabbed your arm "ill come with, boys heres my keys. Ill see you later" "bam..." you rolled your eyes, both of you walking toward your car "you cant just do that bam" "yes i can?"

You both get into your car and he sighs "so? Where the fuck have you been?" You can admit, he had got a bit more bratty than the last time you saw him "tone it down on the bitchyness you dont need to impress anyone here. I moved to delaware, i got a job and a house" he scoffed "delaware is shit" "how would you know bambam?" Both your faces shocked at the nickname "did you just call me bambam? You havent called me that in ages" he blushed slight "so anyways. Why did you leave me?" You rolled your eyes, why is he so quizitive? "bam look not right now okay?" "No tell me" "fine. You never stuck up for me EVER your friends would bully me all the time. Everytime they where near you would reject even going near me." A tinge of guilt shadowed his face "look im a changed person, i was eighteen then" "yeah and so was i, i would've done that to you. Bam we dated for th-" "where you going?" You where taken back by his butting in "um my moms?" "Great i havent seen her in ages… well what are you waiting for?" You reluctantly started the car GOD WHY AM I STILL DOING THINGS FOR HIM

Before the engine could even start bam was looking in the storage bits of the car "where the fuck is my h.i.m cd?!" "Its in you dipshit" you pressed the play button and the music started, bam froze in confusion "oh... you actually listen to them?" You nod silently, driving out the parking lot "sweet..." he mumbles. Something about his company wasnt unwanted, it felt natural and... happy? "I kinda missed you, y/n." He spoke, like he was embarrassed. "I missed you too bam". He got more comfortable, headbanging the way he always did making you giggle "your really looking good bam" "you too y/n, are we almost there?" "Very close, something i should probably tell you first" he raised his brow, stopping his small rave "what?" "My mums really ill, thats why im back home" "oh shit..."

You purposely get out of the car before bam, speed walking to your door "there you are! Thought u popped your clogs for a min-" "dad, someone decided to tag along me" "hey brian!" Bam greeted him with a smile, holding all your shopping bags. your dads face dropped. Your dad didnt like bam, he thought he was a 'bad example' if anything "hello brandon" he says through gritted teeth, standing aside for you both to make your way in "hey princess, long time no see!" However, your mom had always been a fan, he always flattered her "bam! Nice seeing you son!" Bam had walked into the kitchen with the bags, he knew his way around the house too well. You followed behind him, helping putting the groceries away "its weird seeing you being responsible" "me? Well you know, im just trying to make it easier for your mom" he spoke, head in the freezer putting the icecream away "it means the world to us bam thankyou" he gets up with a genuine smile you missed with your whole soul on his face "princess do you need anything in?" He shouts to your mum "all i need is a catch up from you m'love" "im great with women what can i say" he winks at you, making his way into the living room.

Four hours of bam talking about jackass, the new show he had coming up and relentless questions from your dad had passed. It had became clear that ur dad didnt really hate bam as much as he used to *KNOCK KNOCK* you stood up "ill get that!" You opened the door to ryan, novak, raab, dico and frantz looking at you like lost children "is bam here?" Novak asked "yeah hes just-" all the boys pushed by you into your living room where bam sat with a cup of tea laughing with your mom "bam we have been looking for you like crazy!" Ryan says, nodding a hello to your mom and dad "ryan please leave" you asked impatiently "its okay fattie mcfat fat we are talking to bam" dico said in his best ‘intelligent’ voice, your dad got annoyed at his comment, knowing how youve been struggling with your weight as a child "get out! Out!" He shouts, the boys running out like a flock of scared sheep. You met them out of the door "stop calling me that!" "But you think its funny?" "Ive never found it funny! Its fucking upsetting, just leave. My mums ill and shes happy around bam. Im sure you can deal without him for a little" "yeah lets go guys, sorry for the hassle" ryan apologised, all of them walking away.

You open your door to bam putting on his jacket "im so sorry about that david" "its okay brandon. We will see you later" you dad walked back to the living room and left you and bam im the hall way "im so sorry for that y/n" you shook your head "its fine call me" you slipped your number into his hands and he left with a beaming smile.

~

The next day u heard absolutely nothing from bam, your phone firm in your hand but not a single message went through. You helped your mum stay comfy, fix the heating for her, make her cups of tea and she was forever grateful "sunshine? Wheres bam?" Sunshine was a nickname bam and your mom had given you that you hadnt heard in too long "i dont know mom, he hasnt called" you tried to hide how disappointed you where "thats a shame, i found a show me mightve liked"

12am arrived and you sat in your childhood bedroom, looking at your phone as if itwould suddenly beep on. But it didnt. Instead of getting all hung up over him again you stuck on the cky disk that lay ndxt to your cd player quietly.

1am *tink* you heard a little noise but ignored it *tink* *tink* what the fuck? You looked round your room for the small noise *TINK* it sounded from your window and you opened your blinds, bam and ryan stood how they always did at the bottom, you opened your window and stuck your head out "what are you? Children?" "Yeah, we are coming up"  you watched as the two climbed up on the small roof, helping eachother out. You grabbed onto ryans clammy hand to help him and he helped bam in "cky? Awesome!" Ryan said loudly, walking to the cd player "ryan shut the fuck up my parents are home" "what are you? A child?" You smacked his head with the back of your hand. Ryan was like the cousin you would only see occasionally. Bam lay in your bed behind you, you felt like you had two toddlers twaddling around all curious "sorry y/n i cant stay for long, bam told me not to" ryan said looking back at you both, the light against his face showing his growing facial hair  "that wasnt the excuse we practiced pube face" bam groaned "whaaat? Im forgetful remember?" Ryan said sarcastically, they went on like a married couple too often.

30 minutes later, ryan was leaving out the window leaving only you and bam "this room hasnt changed at all" He spoke taking your attention away from the window where you watched ryan walk back to his house "i havent been in it for 5 years, you laughed, looking around "what happened to the camera?" "The camera? OH" you searched under your bed for the professional camera that you had gotten with your own money in the 90s, coated in dust "i retired her alittle" you laughed. Bam put his arm around you the way he always did when you would show him the pictures and held you close. The pictures loaded up as you went through them, the occasional funny ones or ones where he fell appeared.

They brought you back to that point in your life when you would run away with him, drinking in abandoned skateparks and annoying the locals. 'Outlaws' , 'misfits' they called you. You laughed in their faces, so unaware of what was to come.

"god these are so good" he laughed, eventually you came across a picture of you two kissing and skipped by it quickly "hey what was that?" Bam laughed, skipping back "wow shes gorgeous i wonder where she is now" he nudged you "SHE is? Have you saw him?" You nudged him back "y/n?" "Yes bam bam?" "Can i kiss you?" Your face flushed and you looked at him supprised, instead of answering you kissed him, his warm hand coming up to cradle your face. You didnt want to have sex with him, you didnt need to. All you wanted was to feel whole again with him, the feeling of having him near was all you wanted "i missed you" you whispered, bringing your head down onto his shoulder "why didnt you call or visit me after i left you?" He brought his arms around you "i was scared" "scared?" "I didnt want to admit that i was a shitty boyfriend" “did you even think of contacting me?” “No… im sorry. I was a naive child” “so was i” he planted a gentle kiss on your forehead “so when are you going back?” “Tomorrow..." "tomorrow ?!" He freaks out grabbing your hands and pulling away from the hug "why are you leaving me so soon" you laugh alittle "bam i have a job, a house" "friends?" Your face drops.

Maybe delaware wasnt a bad place to live in but god you where fucking lonley. Day after day after day you would wake up in a double bed alone hoping that somehow you would wake up in the warm embrace of him.

"i dont need friends" "y/n cmon, you got a good thing here in westchester" bam brought your hands up to his face as he looked deep into your eyes “bam its not that simple, i cant just give up my life” “well tonight im going to make up for being so shitty. Get your shit together we are going”

[rocky-the-rockstar]

i am yet again holding myself by the scruff i want to say all for pink ok ok 2, 6, 7, 11, 24 for pink 5, 9, 10, 16 for chester 16 also for cupid for reasons that are innocent bats lashes

One of these days ur gonna let go of your own scruff and be free and the world's gonna explode cuz it can't contain you.

Buckle up this is gonna be a long ass post

2. "Something people wouldn't expect about your oc just by looking at them"

I think just in general Pink's personality can be pretty contrary to his appearance. He swears alot, he's somewhat irritable, he can be bitchy and sarcastic, he's down horrendous for like every man he's ever laid eyes on, he's depressed as all hell, more often than not his house is a mess, things like that. Also just his interest in horror. Also him being emo, he doesn't usually dress like it but say MCR within his earshot and good luck getting rid of him. Taking this man to Hot Topic is a disaster they got both worlds.

6. "How easily could he be convinced to do something against his morals"

Aaaaa this is a bit more difficult because Pink is pretty firm in his personal set of morals. But I mean like if you wanted to be an emotionally manipulative asshole you could like become close friends with him and then threaten to leave if he doesn't do whatever it is. That'll get him.

7. "What's one way they've changed since you first made them"

OH MAN PINK HAS CHANGED SO MUCH like almost completely. Some of that is just like figuring out what I wanna do with him and some of it is canon change (such as him becoming a bit more bold in the way he talks and more comfortable speaking up, that's a canon development not like a random change) You were kinda there when I made Pink cuz I interacted a bit with Eboy but idk if you remember, Pink was virtually a blank slate when I made him and was just kinda there To Be Cute and to just Go Along With Whatever Ended Up In My Askbox. So ig the main change now is that he just has a defined personality and depth as a character?

11. This is the weapon question imma skip since I already answered :3

24. Alternative life path they may have gone down

Ok ok so the main one would have been that Cupid DIDN'T become a huge dick and a betray him and they continue making music together and both become famous.

CHESTER TIME

5. How far is your oc willing to go to get what they want

Stalking and murder, mayyybe kidnapping

9. Lyric or quote association

Like all of My Axe and In My Room by ICP and An Unhealthy Obsession by Blake Robinson Synthetic Orchestra. I also really want to say Chop Chop Slide by ICP 😭 he's allowed to get goofy with his murder sometimes

10. An au that would be interesting to explore with him

Augh I think he'd be so much fun in Truffula Flu.

I also find the idea of an au where he is just Some Guy who plays a slasher in a movie would be so funny and idk why

16. What's his pain tolerance like

He has a very high physical pain tolerance, like to the point of being absurdly indifferent. Like bro might get a burn or gash and not even notice till he sees it. If he sees it he'll be like "oh yeah that kinda hurts damn" but his reaction to injury is so delayed

16. For Cupid as well

Terrible. This man has a very low pain tolerance but he's a complete bitch about it like pretending he doesn't care or that it's nothing, but he very much does care and will start whining about it nonstop. He's kinda pathetic ngl 😭

[missmichelle06]

A gigantic list of toons that exist in my oc world called "Chester and Friends" with info about the world (part 1)

Chester

Chester is pretty much the main character and the goofiest of the bunch. He's one of two fox twins. He often gets into very silly shenanigans. He's very happy-go-lucky and absolutely loves making new friends. He is Melanie's love interest.

Melody

Chester's twin sister! She doesn't delve into goofy stuff as often as Chester, but will still sometimes go on adventures with him. Like Chester, she loves making new friends. She is Wilbur's love interest.

Wilbur

Wilbur is a panther who's often rather pessimistic and sarcastic. He usually has an attitude and is very sarcastic. He will end up softening up to Chester and Melody, becoming friends with them. He eventually becomes Melody's love interest.

Liam (no full-body picture yet)

Liam is a cartoon fox who's known for being easily spooked and weary. Once you get to know him, you will find that he's a very loving person and cares deeply for his friends. He also has a wife who belongs to @starry-boxes :D

Gladys

Gladys is a toon cat from the country. She loves farming, talking to people, and making sweets for her friends. Gladys is a lot stronger than she looks, easily being able to pick up Liam. Her lover is Oliver, a character that belongs to my boyfriend. Gladys lived most of her childhood on her uncle's farm.

Uncle Billy

Billy is Gladys' uncle and the brother to Gladys' father, Darren. He has a farm, and is very jolly and sweet man. He's always willing to help anyone in need.

Alise and Darren

Alise and Darren are Gladys' parents. They're very busy, plus Darren's line of work is very dangerous, so he'd leave Gladys at his brother's farm for most of the time. Alise and Darren still tried to visit and be there for Gladys as much as they could.

[theoriginaltortuga]

the last main babe!! Jeremiah Chu-Blanco!!

Jeremiah “Jeremy” “Jer” Chu-Blanco, my single pringle!!

is a trans guy and uses he/him

is aromantic and bisexual 

is Chinese-Mexican-American, his parents were both from Mexicali and immigrated to the States when he was four

grew up fluent in Spanish and Cantonese, with a fairly heavy Mexican accent, kind of faded, but noticeable if you know it’s there

grew up a sarcastic jackass, got really aggressive just after the accident before reining it in back to sarcasm after a couple months

main weapon: his hands, also a knife he found in a literal dumpster (he does not tell Amalia this because he thinks she’ll make him get rid of it and he’s attached)

did not want to go to college, but lied his ass off to Lia 

is besties with Lincoln, decided on this after realizing Lincoln was also into art, Lincoln was not consulted 

has the large serpent tattoo on his shoulder, wanted to cry the whole time, but needed to look cool in front of Lincoln, it was Jer’s first tattoo

loves Abel’s nerd rants and is genuinely taking mental notes when he does

ends up with all weapons, all lore docs and in a mixed route 

is besties with Reina and Delia 

thinks Connor is the coolest thing since sliced bread and imprints on him like a duck

gets along best with Danni of the ILB crew but they roast each other in a way that makes people think they hate each other

so weirdly gets along best with Lily of the ilitw crew, half silence/half nerd rants as he does love video games and is curious about the technical side

“Fun” Facts

sobs his eyes out, his first night alone in his new apartment

despite his comfort in being himself, still feels a call to pick one or the other even though the choice is long gone

Is never quite the same around Jocelyn but makes an effort to be friendly (its difficult because he’d genuinely liked her a lot and considered them friends)

loved and loves his sister to bits and pieces and will always consider himself an older brother

Shares custody of Chester the Bone Dog with Reina

does go to college/trade school to be a jeweler when not hunting down horrors

feels overwhelming guilt about choosing himself, but goes into full blown panic attacks at the thought of returning to the Power and has nightmares starring it and Loha

frequently calls up Reina and Delia to go for late night drives and convivence store runs when he wants to peel his skin off for both dysphoria and Power reasons

never went on testosterone out of the hesitation over his body not quite feeling like his (now “knows” this to be true) also the reason he kept dyeing his hair white like the OG Jer, but is looking into it

buys himself a plush raccoon named “Chips” who takes residence in his car like Kenna, rags on Noah for Kenna until Noah finds Chips and threatens to tell Lincoln and Joss

after the last horror is found and cured, he, Reina, and Delia take a road trip to New York and back...in the middle of the night...without warning any of their loved ones....i did mention they share a brain cell

@ila-appreciationweek​

[happyk44]

June: I am so fucking normal! About everyting! All the fucking time!!

Chester: Yeah, 'cause you seem real fucking normal right now.

June: Thank you, I'm so glad you agree!

Chester: I was being sarcastic.

June: And I chose not to hear it that way!

[deathsbecome]

@retriibutions: ❛ They’re all lucky to have you. It’s pretty rare to have a friend who’s relentlessly got your back. ❜ - chester

yello.wjackets season 2 starters / accepting

Addy gives a somewhat blank stare at Chester for a moment. "Sorry, are you being sarcastic?" Addy was generally an outsider too the rest of the park. She had her friends in the park, sure, but ultimately she kept to herself. She's not exactly what the others would consider fun, only lingering around the others for a little bit each night before going off on her own. At other points she does get irritable, over stimulation resulting in a bit of harshness towards other. It doesn't mean she isn't willing to back a lot of them up, if needed, though, just that it's hard for her to grasp.

[crossoverquest]

Location: The ruins of Chester V’s factory

Chester V, in a Sentinel of Safety Suit: Can’t hear anything in this… (Ejects)

Jack: I thought I recognized that voice.

Flint: Chester V?

Chester V: So much to catch up on! Where do I start?

Flint: How about your death?

Chester V: What, you mean being eaten by that Cheespider? Pfft! That was a headache at most. I mean, if you wanna kill me, you gotta take my head clean off. It does the job every time- Well, most of the time, I think. I don’t know; I’ve never really been sure about that.

Olive, entering the scene: Oh, I’m quite sure it’s all the time. Allow me to demonstrate.

Chester V, nervously: Olive, welcome.

Jack, to Chester V: Olive is a friend.

Sam: Olive, watch him. Make sure he doesn’t do anything suspicious like, you know, kill me.

Flint: How did you end up here, Chester?

Chester V: I was captured by some poachers- actually, they weren’t all poachers, two were Thinkquanauts that belonged to my successor, one was a Galarian idol; Fun bunch. They captured my loyalists and a Rotom that possessed one of my Sentinel of Safety suits; they were in rough shape. We were cage mates until Jack and I sprung us out of there. I jumped out, arms go a-flying, and then here we are, the best of friends.

Jayden, Chester V’s Sentinel Rotom, to Jack, ominously: We are not friends. You saved my life.

Chester V: Oh, right. I should tell him about about the factory thing. Thank you for that. It’s kind of a long story. Jayden killed a Phantom Empire affiliated lot, now it’s ours again.

Jayden Shiba: Jayden?

Chester V: Oh, yeah! I named it after you.

Jayden Shiba, sarcastically: I’m honored.

Olive: It’s been nice catching up and all, but Jack and I just came by to tell you that the whole of Live Corp’s ours now.

Chester V: Is that so, Olive? Well, you’re welcome to it, champion! I and Jayden are done with the Corporate game. It’s a right pain. You gotta feed your workers, train your workers, make sure you don’t get into legal trouble with your followers, yeah. It’s a right bother.

Jack: Well, your worries are over, because now I’m in charge of the Thinkquanauts.

Chester V: No, uh-uh, no, no, no, no! Not you! Anybody but you! Whatever you need, officer, me and Jayden have got you covered. Wait, Jayden, Jayden, it’s a little confusing, isn’t it? But the point is, SPD cannot be in charge of my life’s work!

Jayden the Sentinel Rotom: I agree.

Chester V: Well, I’m not working for SPD, I’ll tell you that right now.

Flint: Well, that works out perfectly, because we got no current openings for anyone with ill will towards Swallow Falls and my life’s work!

(Chester V, Jayden the Rotom, and Flint argue while Olive and Jack huddle up.)

Jack: Ignore these squabbling fools. They have their uses, but we must choose our next move with care.

Olive: You read my mind.

(Olive and Jack break up their huddle and look at Flint and Chester V.)

Flint, to Chester V: Maybe you haven’t noticed, but I’m a mighty, vicious… Cheespider’s friend!

[pkmacabre-shadow]

Captain N: Adventures in Smash

Chapter 2

As Pit and Megaman flew in the sky, they looked down to where the forest is - the location of the power they’re investigating. At the corner of his eye, the blue bomber looked closer to see a flashing light.

Pit: Something wrong Rock?

Megaman: I saw a light down there. Could be an explosion or fire.

Pit: That could be our source of that power! Let’s go Rock. *flys down*

Megaman: Pit wait!- *sighs* When will he learn…

The robot then flys down, following the angel. As he made it, he saw the source of fire coming from. They look new to him, albeit unique in some way.

There is a blonde boy wearing a yellow hoodie and a blue and white varsity jacket. He’s holding onto a blade. Beside him is a tan girl wearing a red hoodie; it looks like she’s wearing it like a dress. She appears to have gauntlets on her arms, testing her strength on some trees. And finally, there is a girl with dirty blonde hair. She looks unique from her outfit to how she’s using her weapon, as if being more reckless with it, being in a form of a gun.

The tan girl lifted and threw some tree stumps at the two with them either being sliced up or blown to bits. It also appears that some of them were kicked down. When the training is over, they all sat down taking a breath.

Wren: Phew, throwing those trees are a lot of work.

Chester: You think that’s bad? Try getting a hit only for it to be stolen by your trigger happy friend here.

Melody: Hey!

Wren: Even so, we need to do something here once we learn our powers. We might as well go camping until we finally get the help we need.

Pit: There you are!

The three turned to where the sound originated from, with Pit and the robot landing.

Melody: Megaman?

Chester: Ah great, more fighters to remind us that this isn’t a dream.

Pit: Sheesh. Sarcastic much? Anyway, the name’s Pit. You may know my friend here, his name’s Megaman.

Wren: Hehe- actually my friends and I already know about you guys. My friend Melody is a huge Megaman fan, same thing for Chester’s other friend. Nice meeting you, though.

Pit: Really now? I knew Megaman has fans since he stopped Wily but I never knew he has more out there.

Wren looked at Melody talking to Megaman, asking a ton of questions about his battles and such. She chuckled, wondering if Chester's neighbor would react if he met the robot in real life like her friend here, knowing how much of a fan he is to Megaman.

Wren: I just remembered something. We haven’t introduced properly yet.

Pit: You do have a point there.

Wren: Since my friends and I already knew you and Megaman from a separate world, I think I should start first. My name is Wren Chaiya, the other two are Chester Keene and Melody Helder.

Chester: Hey. Anyways, how we end up here is rather confusing to say the least… My sister found a CD ROM, so I decided to invite my friends over and suddenly got transported to here.

Megaman: And you also have these *points to the controllers*

Chester: Uh yeah. They’re joycons, what about them?

Megaman: I’ve seen something similar like that decades ago with the old power pad. It has similar powers as yours but this one is much stronger.

Melody: So what you’re saying is that the power pads grow stronger each year as technology evolves?

Megaman: Bingo!

All of a sudden, creatures made of dark energy surround them.

Chester: *pulls out blade from power pad* What the- What are those?!

Pit: Primids! They’re weak enemies but they can pack a punch!

[briamichellewrites]

72

Once Bria was done getting ready, they talked about what they wanted to do. They discussed walking around and seeing what they came up with. That sounded like an awesome idea. Bradley jokingly asked her how many times she used the word awesome. It was about ninety-nine point nine percent of the time. They could turn pretty much everything she said into a drinking game. He thought that would be interesting. She grabbed her purse and phone. Did he have a room key? Yes, he did.

The temperature was nice outside. It was the middle of summer, so she was wearing a long flowing skirt with a matching cropped t-shirt and lace-up sandals. If they could, they would rent a car and drive to New Orleans for the day. It would take them a little over an hour to drive there. They didn’t have time to do that. Maybe they would go there for a vacation sometime.

The city was busy since it was the weekend. Justin found she could keep up with his sarcastic sense of humor. He appreciated that. He was The Peacemaker of his friends, who hated conflict and just wanted everyone to get along. While also having an outgoing personality. Bradley thought he and Bria would get along and they were! Bria was outgoing, though people who didn’t understand her mental health problems would find her exhausting to deal with.

She needed people who were empathetic and patient with her. They had to learn how to help her, while also never giving up on her. They came across a military ship, the USS Kidd. It looked interesting, so they decided to explore it. It was a museum dedicated to citizens of Louisiana who had played a part in military history. It was very interesting to learn about.

Meow? Dog, what are you doing? Phoenix laughed as Anya watched Bella trying to kill a stuffed rabbit. Grr. I’m a good hunter! She thought the dog was strange and she didn’t understand her. Phoenix was enjoying watching the animals interact with each other. He and Linsey did their usual Saturday cleaning while he took the dogs out for a walk and to use the bathroom. His mother was coming over with Joe, so Linsey was out getting groceries for dinner. He was alone in the house.

It was a huge deal and it required a lot of trust. She took his car keys, so he couldn’t sneak out to buy alcohol. He was doing a great job of remaining sober and she was so proud of him! Therapy sessions and talking to his sponsor helped a lot! Missy scratched an itch behind her ear before running to the door. Buddy and Bella followed behind her. Bark! Bark! Bark!

Humans are here! Humans are here! It was Linsey. He held open the door for her, so she could come in. She asked for help getting the bags in. Yeah, he could do that. The dogs followed her into the kitchen. Is anything in there for me? Phoenix grabbed the last two bags and brought them inside.

“I found a few more things we’re out of while I was there.”

“Well, as long as you’re there. Why make another trip?”

Together, they put everything away where it belonged before getting prepared to make dinner for their guests. Anya and Woody came in to see what they were doing. They smelled food. Meow? No, it was human food. Not cat food. They meowed in disappointment before running off again back to the living room. Woody used his paw to clean his face.

Mike and Chester were both trying to get his three boys to get along. Chester separated them and had them do something else. That stopped the fighting for the moment. They would find something else to fight about later. That was part of being brothers. They didn’t always get along. The older boys often complained about Draven getting in the way. Chester and Mike had compassion for him because he was the youngest. He just wanted to do what his brothers were doing.

They invited him to help them take the dogs for a walk. Okay. The dogs perked up and ran to the door. Let’s go for a walk, humans! Come on! They were both very excited! Chester let Jaime and Isaiah know where they were going. Okay, Dad. After getting their harnesses on and attaching the leashes, they opened the door and went outside.

It was such a beautiful Saturday afternoon. Misty and Bruiser had their tongues out and big smiles on their faces. Draven was doing a great job of holding Misty’s leash. They both acknowledged it. He had a smile of pride on his face. Jaime and Isaiah didn’t get to have one-on-one time with his daddy, but he did! He liked Mike, even though he didn’t understand the concept of him being his daddy’s boyfriend. At four years old, that was perfectly normal.

He wasn’t expected to. The dogs wanted to smell everything. After finding a good spot, they did their business.

“Ew”, Draven said in disgust.

They laughed. Thankfully, they didn’t have to clean anything up. Misty made sure her brother was behind her. He was. Bark! Come on, Bruiser! He barked back. I’m coming! He walked as fast as his little legs could go. Draven sat on the curb. Chester asked him if he was okay. Yes, he just wanted to play with the dogs. He could do that when they got home. They were almost there. He got up and continued walking. When they got back inside, he was told how great of a job he had done!

They exchanged high-fives with him. They then went into the living room to play. Draven got up and ran to the bathroom. Chester followed him to make sure he didn’t have an accident, while Mike checked on Jaime and Isaiah. They were both playing by themselves. He let them know they were back. Draven did have a little accident. It was cleaned up.

They then went into his bedroom for clean pants and underwear. At four years old, he was still learning how to listen to his body. He didn’t always know when he had to go potty until it was too late. His pediatrician told him and Samantha that was normal for children his age. Once it was over, they stopped talking about it. Chester let him play until it was time for dinner. He ran back to his room while he washed his hands in the sink.

Joe was helping Phoenix in the kitchen while Linsey stayed in the living room with their mother, Kathy. He was in a good mood and the brothers were joking around. Anya jumped up on the couch to investigate the new human. She sniffed her but didn’t recognize her scent. Kathy asked if she could pet her. She assumed the cat was a girl. Yes, she was. Her name was Anya. She was very friendly.

Anya let her pet her. Who’s cat was she? She was their friend, Bria’s. How was she doing? She was doing better than she had been. Was she still in the hospital? No, she was at home. She was fully independent again.

Good for her! Yeah, she worked so hard to get to where she was! They were very proud of her. She was in Louisiana visiting her boyfriend, who was making a movie. That’s why they had her animals for the week. Since Kathy heard so much about her, she wanted to meet her. Linsey thought she would love that. She would text her about coming over when she returned home.

@zoeykaytesmom @feelingsofaithless @alina-dixon

[art-of-manliness]

Odds & Ends: December 22, 2023

Code Talker: The First and Only Memoir by One of the Original Navajo Code Talkers of WWII by Chester Nez. During WWII, the Marines recruited members of the Navajo tribe to create a secret military code based on the Navajo language; the code was ultimately crucial in helping the Americans win many battles — including taking Iwo Jima — and is the only spoken military code never to have been deciphered. Despite mistreatment by the government growing up, Chester Nez remained very patriotic and volunteered for the Marines during the war; he was selected to be part of the original all-Navajo platoon that developed the code and then deployed it in the field, making round-the-clock transmissions on Guadalcanal and other campaigns in the Pacific theater. Nez’s memoir is an easy, relatively short read about an interesting, oft-overlooked part of WWII history and covers his life before, during, and after the war, and how his warrior heritage and the Navajo traditions helped him live the “Right Way.” Heat Therapy Patches. If you’ve got an ache or pain, using a heating pad can bring relief. Problem is, a heating pad tethers you to an electrical cord, and if you’re using one while you sleep, the pad won’t stay in the spot you want to treat. Enter heat therapy patches. Stick one on your body (they say to stick it on your clothes, but to be hot enough and stay in the same place, I put it directly on my skin), and you get 12 hours of soothing, limbering heat. I use this generic brand, and it works well. When I feel some niggle in my back that threatens to turn into a chronic problem, I put a patch on my back before bed, and when I get up — voila! — the pain is gone. The Age of Average. Have you noticed that everything looks the same these days? A coffee shop in Tulsa, OK looks pretty much the same as a coffee shop in Raleigh, NC. Airbnbs have mostly the same interior designs. Cars look the same. Even people look the same. Have you noticed how female Instagram influencers all have the same sort of “look”? The kids these days call it “Instagram face.” Alex Murrell calls this rising monoculture “the age of average” and explores what’s behind it in this article. Once you know about the age of average, you’ll start seeing it everywhere. Here’s to zigging when everyone else is zagging.  The Man Who Came to Dinner. I watched this 1942 film after Jeremy Arnold recommended it in our podcast episode about classic Christmas movies. The Man Who Came to Dinner is an offbeat screwball comedy about an acerbic literary critic named Sheridan Whiteside who slips on ice and injures himself outside a family’s home in Ohio. Forced to stay with the family during the Christmas season while he recovers, Whiteside quickly takes over the household with his demanding, eccentric behavior. Monty Woolley and Bette Davis crackle in this movie as they throw sarcastic zings at each other. A great film to remind you of the virtues of being a good houseguest during the holidays.  Quote of the Week I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach. ― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol The post Odds & Ends: December 22, 2023 appeared first on The Art of Manliness. http://dlvr.it/T0VK3X

[theliterateape]

Man Fights For Right to Marry Fictional Character

by Joe Janes

Chester Clayborn, 52, of Port Clinton, Ohio has filed a lawsuit against Ottawa County, where he resides, to allow him to lawfully marry a fictional character.

When asked which fictional character he wants to marry, he replied, “Let’s just say I’m on the market, ladies, and open to possibilities. On my list are April from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014), Princess Leia (original trilogy), and Counselor Troi (Star Trek: The Next Generation TV show). I’m open to different species, too. It’s not just about hot humanoid body types. I think a big slug-like Hutt would be really interesting. I also have a crush on Anna Kendrick, but I have heard she may not be fictional which would significantly limit my chances.”

Clayborn says he discovered his attachment to fictional characters while on a blind date. “We were at the Frisch’s Big Boy on Perry Street and, you know, making what people call small talking, and she asked me about my family. I told her all about them and how some of them serve in Starfleet and some of them are resistance fighters. A few live in a shire. I told her the toughest thing about being middle-aged is watching your parents grow old. Jean-Luc Picard, my dad, is way up there and, even though he’s an android, he’s still programmed to die of natural causes. Natural causes for a human, not an android. My other dad, Luke Skywalker, passed away a few years ago, but, because of him being a Jedi and The Force and all, I feel like he is always with me.

Then she asked if I just got off work because of my uniform. Wow. No. I don’t work at the Best Buy. This is my Starfleet Academy uniform which she also recommended I wash. Sigh.

She had no idea what I was talking about, so, I tapped my communicator and ordered Geordi to beam me up. Nothing happened, so when the bill came, we just split it, even though she ordered the popcorn shrimp appetizer and ate most of it. I’m a gentleman. I learned that from my aunt, Dr. Beverly Crusher. She’s awesome. If she wasn’t my aunt, I would totally marry her, but then Wesley would go from being my cousin to being my son and he’s annoying.”

As they left the restaurant, Clayborn declared there would not be a second date and his blind date said he should date someone from Battle Stars or whatever. “She was being sarcastic,” Clayborn said, “but I think she was on to something. I should be with someone who makes me happy.”

County Commissioner Saul Tribble commented about the lawsuit, “We’re looking into it. It really hinges on legal consent and if the fictional character is able to take their wedding vows. I know with all this AL stuff, it’s likely they could. We’re also worried that this could open up the floodgates for people to marry cartoon characters, characters from literature, historical figures, too. What if someone wants to marry Frankenstein’s monster? Do we need to get permission of all the fictional people who make up his body parts? I don’t know. I just don’t know.”

Chester Clayborn spends most of his time in his studio apartment above the Family Dollar store. While Clayborn anxiously awaits the court’s decision, he is actively looking for a potential bride while binge-watching Star Trek: The Next Generation and occasionally shouting “Hey!” to see if any of the characters turn and look at him. His landlord has asked him to keep it down and to please crack open a window.

[susanoosama01]

AU Michael has a love-hate marriage with AU Adam who kinda doesn't approve of the atrocities but this bad boy actually brought Kate Milligan back to life and it was the end of the world so... Anyway, they don't really like each other but AU Adam is the only one who never stopped talking back to AU Michael, literally asking for his death but it's very boring without this stubborn and sarcastic human around. They can't stand each other. AU Raphael is dead and cannot judge his brother anymore so what's keeping AU Michael from having a human pet? And excuse you, AU Adam has an archangel pet, not the other way around. They fight sooo much, it's why AU Michael has a separate vessel. Because he was developing a celestial migraine with AU Adam there. And AU Adam was to be a nice trophy consort because all dictators have at least one, right? Except this human doesn't stop sitting on the throne himself with some trashy magazine, forcing AU Michael to stand and act cool as if he is too flashy to sit on a throne and being a little shit in front of the enslaved reapers and the monster army. He gets on AU Michael's nerves so bad but they are kinda stuck with each other since they literally have nothing better to do. Also it has something to do with all these completely accidental nephilim babies running around now because well, some activities were much more fun with hate and anger and passion- No they most certainly do not like each other! AU Michael doesn't want to pay child support and AU Adam doesn't want to deal with visit day schedules. So it doesn't matter if AU Michael is forced to be civil with Kate Milligan when dropping off and picking up her son and grandbabies at her house. It doesn't matter if AU Adam has to take care of the 'palace' while his husband is conquering somewhere. They both have no other friend. It's fun fighting every single day, trying to kill each other only occasionally and celebrating a victory with you know what. They try to be a proper family sometimes, to have a nice dinner but their babies are little tornadoes who scorch the entire city in less then five minutes when they are playing together. It's exasperating. They need each other to deal with all that, right?

PS

AU Michael wanted grand names for his heirs! Like Alexander, Cyrus, Julius, Cleopatra etc. But instead they are named Ben, Chester, Pete, Lacey etc. because I carried them and risked my life to have them while you were out with your friends in yet another battle- Actually, Was I not with you during each and every birth? Did I not shower you in gifts and care, you traitorous little- but in the end the kids like their names so they stay that way.