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campfam4lyfe · 6 months ago

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I get that Brooklynn is your favorite, she used to be mine too, but what are your thoughts on her in chaos theory? Don't you feel they destroyed her character? She's not herself anymore, and the fact that she can just. Fake her death and traumatize her friends/neglect her boyfriend like. I don't know, thats not it. I don't like her much anymore.

time to do my job as a brooklynn defender lol, alright here goes:

Don't you feel they destroyed her character? She's not herself anymore, and the fact that she can just. Fake her death and traumatize her friends/neglect her boyfriend like. I don't know, thats not it.

So. Thinking about Brooklynn. About her death. You mention how she faked it. except, I don’t think saying she faked it is really an accurate or fair description.

Brooklynn didn’t fake anything—here is what we know, and here is what I mean. The facts that we are presented with through season 1. limited as they are, are that Brooklynn was at a Dino Drop, the allosaurus escaped, and that it "killed her." Except it didn't really kill her. It is framed as an accident--a random Dino attack. But Ben shows up and suddenly it's clear that maybe it wasn't an accident.

So let's run through the facts one more time. Brooklynn's 'death' at the hands of the allosaurus wasn't an accident. It was premeditated. The attack was an honest to goodness attempt on Brooklynn's life. One the camp fam--and the people who targeted Brooklynn in the first place--believed worked. You're going to want to keep this in mind, because now I am going to address the other part of your ask.

Brooklynn's character has not, to me, been destroyed.

We see little of Brooklynn and what she was doing throughout Chaos Theory, because we are learning about her again through the eyes and memories of the people who loved and mourned her--we are gathering bits and pieces, parts of the narrative that we, as the viewers, can piece together more efficiently than the actual players, because the knowledge the Camp Fam has is disjointed in that they are not all privy to the same information or how it connects--and it's not their fault at all! They are not working under the same information we have--that Brooklynn is alive--and so, don't know why certain things are more important. Even we don't have the full picture, although what we have is a little clearer.

But from what we see of Brooklynn throughout Chaos Theory, there is something there that you believe is not true to her previously established character. I disagree. I think what you are talking about, when you say that she is not herself anymore, is that Brooklynn is too invested in her conspiracies, so much so that she has thrown everything else away--her "life", her regard for her friends/family and her relationships with them.

But I think, that when it comes to Brooklynn, being obsessed with a conspiracy or mystery is in fact a major core part of her character. We saw it all throughout Camp Cretaceous. She sneaks away when they visit Wu's lab that first time to snoop--and yes, maybe it was for her followers, trying to find something juicy before everything went to shit, but what she saw clearly stood out to her. She was hooked, she reviewed that footage, and it stayed with her so much so that when she saw the label E750 again at a later date while on the security cameras, she lingered over the shot before having to move on to help the others. And even then, it was clear that it stayed with her--whatever Wu did, whatever E750 was, it was a mystery and Brooklynn wanted to solve it.

And we see the others are aware of this! Sammy recruits Brooklynn to help out in her quest to find information, and the mystery consumes Brooklynn so much that initially, she was steamrolling right over Sammy's input. We also see Brooklynn's thirst for mystery solving when she becomes so focused on the frozen flowers, something she mentioned so much so that the other campers could quote her on it. We see it with her suspicions regarding Mitch and Tiff, and even Mae. We see it again in the final episode, when we catch a glimpse of the campers as teenagers. Brooklynn mentions the Lockwood Estate, which, for those who don't know or remember, is where the later events of JW:Fallen Kingdom (timeline wise, this is three years after the first Jurassic World, so three years after the kids first got left behind in the Park.) The events at the Lockwood Estate and what was supposed to be happening there wasn't public knowledge. That was Brooklynn following a lead, as at that point in time when she brings it up, the dinosaurs hadn't been set loose yet.

The reason I mention all this is because I really don't think Brooklynn's obsessiveness or drive is new. She loves investigative work, and she's good at putting together pieces too. She's also been shown to have a love for mysteries, loving Esther Stone and having her videos following the pattern of being named "Brooklynn unboxes x." She likes knowing the whys, whens, wheres, and whats. She literally says that she is trying to make the transition from influencer/vlogger to investigative journalist. Which is why I am not at all surprised with her being so focused on this Dino smuggling rings, and why I believe it was in character.

Tying It All Together

Now I know what you may be thinking. "But she neglected Kenji! That's not good girlfriend behavior. She faked her death! That's horrible." Valid, but also, not fundamentally true.

I said earlier, that by "not herself" you might mean that "Brooklynn is too invested in her conspiracies, so much so that she has thrown everything else away--her "life", her regard for her friends/family and her relationships with them." I don't think she has though, and if it has ended up that way, it was never her intention.

Take in all the Brooklynn scenes from Chaos Theory. Each member of the Camp Fam has an interaction with her that is shown through flashback or hinted at. So let's put together a timeline.

Brooklynn is dead at the start of the show, but for how long, I don't actually remember. I will put it at 6 months to a year, but if anyone else knows for sure, just let me know and I'll fix it. Anyways. She is dead for six months to a year. And in the months leading up to her death, she was investigating something, but they don't know what. We know that it had something to do with Dark Jurassic, Kenji's father, and Dino Smuggling. We know Ben introduced her to Dark Jurassic. We know Brooklynn stayed with Darius, left her jacket at Sammy's, and visited Yaz.

So here goes a tentative undertaking:

Ben introduces Brooklynn to Dark Jurassic and she visits him at his college. He hasn't dropped out/left yet. She is mentioning conspiracy theories, some as a joke, but its clear something there has caught her attention.

Brooklynn gets deeper into Dark Jurassic, and at some point reads about Dino Immersive therapy, which she recommends to Yaz. She visits her at some point, but when, is unclear.

Brooklynn visits Sammy. She is on Dark Jurassic so often that when Sammy has a flashback of her, Brooklynn is visibly on the site.

Brooklynn is with Kenji, but has been so absorbed in her mystery that she has started to neglect Kenji, but doesn't realize it. This goes on for a while. He breaks up with her and they are both devastated.

Brooklynn stays with Darius. Is still embroiled in her mystery. Asks Darius to meet up with her. "Dies."

Now, at some point before 4 and 5, Brooklynn visits Daniel Kon, gets a secret apartment, and is undercover within the Dino Smuggling ring.

We know that she did not tell her friends, or her boyfriend, any of this. Why? Especially Kenji! He was her boyfriend, one of her biggest supporter's, and his father was the guy Brooklynn went to so she could get her in to the smuggling world. Kenji has always heard her out, like when he was the one who stayed behind with her when she accidentally hurt Darius with the 'cool dad' comment. Kenji is the one who agreed to snoop with her regardless of his feelings because it was important to her. So why would she not go to her biggest supporter?

I believe that Chaos Theory tackled the kids growing up and their respective trauma very well. Not all of them are dealing very well. Yaz is the only one who seems to have gone to therapy, while Ben, Darius, and Kenji are all isolating. Sammy is dealing with repression and toxic positivity. It's very possible that Brooklynn was also dealing, and not very well at that. It's possible that her trauma manifested in another way. Maybe she needed to push herself into a project so she could ignore what happened--or maybe she needed to push herself into a project so if something happened, she could be prepared? We don't know! And it's because we don't know that I am going to, for the time being, ignore this, and focus on the possible reasons as to why she didn't tell them from what we do know.

Yaz has PTSD, and struggled a lot with the hopelessness of having to put the dinosaurs first and it costing them their way home in the later seasons of CC. So maybe Brooklynn didn't tell her because she didn't want to halter Yaz's progress. Still, she let on that she was investigating something and about Dark Jurassic.

Sammy is worried about Yaz, and so maybe Brooklynn didn't tell her because involving Sammy might mean involving Yaz, or maybe she didn't want to put stress on their relationship by having Sammy lie to her. Still, she let on that she was investigating something and about Dark Jurassic.

Ben had college. What, was she just going to disrupt that? Still, she let on that she was investigating something and talked with him about Dark Jurassic, which he introduced her to.

Kenji. Kenji was her boyfriend, her rock, THE Brooklynn enabler. who has always heard her out. The only time he didn't hear her out immediately was when his father was interfering. The same father she would need to go to for a door into the smuggling world. The same father who Kenji lived close to but never visited. In the last season of CC, Brooklynn, when investigating Daniel Kim, says that she won't break Kenji's heart without a good reason. Maybe, she did not feel like going to him about his father was a good reason--Kenji was in a good place, how could she hurt him like that? Maybe she thought she was protecting him. So she doesn't tell him. Still, she let on that she was investigating something.

Darius. Darius is my biggest "Brooklynn's Fake Death Can't Be Classified As Willfully Malicious On Her Part" card. Because he is the one that proves that Brooklynn did not in fact get sucked in so deep in her mystery that she tossed away all bonds and relationships. Did her death fuck him up? Definitely. But guys! She called him there that night, they had plans, she was "going to show him something!!!" Guys. She went to Darius. She was going to show Darius. Do you get that. In Chaos Theory, they say "Brooklynn was there to buy the Allosaurus that night." They are heartbroken. Yaz and Sammy say no way, and Darius says it is true, that she had a secret apartment, cash, and a note from Mr.Kim. But guys. She was going to show Darius.

Every time Brooklynn is called out on her behavior and shown how her obsessiveness hurts her friends—the way Sammy called her out when they were investigating E750, or her feeling regret over the “cool dad” comment when investigating Mitch and Tiff—she takes a step back and reassesses. She starts to investigate again but with changed behavior. That’s growth. Kenji breaking up with her may have really been the catalyst to her trying to show Darius what she was up to. As Darius says, Brooklynn was really torn up about the breakup and it is so visible on her face that she is devastated—she loved Kenji. She loved her friends.

So Brooklynn’s behavior, it was not Brooklynn cutting out her friends. Was she 100% honest with all of them? No. And unfortunately, the one person who she was going to show what was going on, didn't get to make it, and Brooklynn was killed.

Except she lived. So why not tell them? Why let them stew in grief? Why abandon them? Look, I think a lot of you are forgetting that the kids are very very good at improv. Are we forgetting Darius and Kash?An attempt on Brooklynn's life was made, and she somehow miraculously survived. She adapted, and made a plan on the go, lying low, somehow creating a trusted network, while being unable to reach out to her friends--it would blow her cover, and also possibly put them in danger. Who knows? Besides. Let's not forget, Ben was not the one who called Darius in that first episode. I don't know, but I do think it could have been Brooklynn, or someone on behalf of her, like Ronnie. (Or it could have been raptor lady to make sure Darius was home but who knows!)

Look, ultimately, you don't have to like her, and I'm not forcing anyone to! I do love her though, and her choices are ones I will defend. Besides, I know we are talking about camp fam trauma reactions to Brooklynn's death, but guys, flip side? We have a character who was going to tell her friend what she was up to, only to have an assassination attempt on her life causing her to lose a limb and go into hiding, not being able to contact her loved ones. I cannot even begin to think of the trauma Brooklynn has.

I hope this answers your ask anon, I feel I rambled too much lol!

#jurassic world chaos theory #jurassic world camp cretaceous #jwcc #jwct #jwct spoilers #jwct speculation #brooklynn #brooklynn jwcc #kenlynn #kenji kon #darius bowman #ben pincus #yasmina fadoula #sammy gutierrez #camp fam #cam fam 4 life #answered ask #anon ask

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miffy-junot · 22 days ago

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I really wanted to be kind, I really try to stay away from discourse, but my friend sent me a post containing opinions so rancid that I had to say something. I'm turning off reblogs and I will not name the user who made the post because I do not want any discourse, please be respectful of this.

Time to respond to the words of "Tumblr user X":

Firstly - I know not everybody here is Christian but to make a post being rude to dead people on All Soul's Day is immensely disrespectful, to say the least. Don't you have any graves to put flowers on, any people to remember?

The majority of people interested in the Napoleonic Wars think Junot is a blundering buffoon. You really have to dig deep to find nuanced sources on him beyond the usual "mad general" stuff. There is a niche community of Gen Z Tumblr bloggers who like Junot, by no means the majority of the Napoleonic community - and since Tumblr is very easy to curate, it's on you if you are stuck in this niche bubble.

Let me tell you, Junot does not have a good reputation at all. You can let the topic go, you are fighting against an enemy that you believe numbers in the hundreds when in fact it is a small group of mentally ill teenagers (many of whom are lgbtq+, which is something interesting in itself).

You are an adult, but how did you graduate high school with no skills of reading comprehension? Nobody has ever said that Junot's actions with Laure were "normal and okay". Once again, you are fighting an imaginary enemy.

Napoblr is essentially a war criminal fandom. That does not make it any more or less valid than other history communities, but it means that we have to take a slightly different approach to moralising historical figures. Almost every single person involved in the Napoleonic Wars would be a bad person if you took their actions out of the historical context. Most people relevant to the Napoleonic Wars were sexist, racist, imperialist pieces of shit who turned a blind eye to war crimes.

Because that makes up such a large percentage of these people, being overly judicious about their morality will leave you with the following group of "unproblematic people": a large gathering of peasants and children, none of whom we know the names of.

"Evil" is a very strong word to use, one which denies nuance, but let me speak in your language: all Napoleonic figures were somewhat "evil", if you are unwilling to deal with "evil" people then study art history, or any other subject that doesn't deal so much with moral complexity.

In my opinion war crimes committed as part of your job are still war crimes????????? "Indirectly" or not, there is little difference between ordering an execution and murdering someone with your own bare hands, in both situation you take away a life from the world and there is blood on your hands. Some might even argue that having a callous approach to life and death is even worse!

And like I have said above: endless moralising is counter-productive. There are better ways to use your time, such as researching things that actually fulfil you.

(just a tiny nitpick but please do not use that certain misogynistic term)

"Could have" and "should have" are words that cannot be used in the study of history. Speculation over endless possibilities of alternative realities is meaningless.

I thought we as a society had moved beyond calling addicts "evil", but apparently not! (and again, "evil" is a very charged term that leaves no room for nuance)

For the record, I support abstinence of all the things you mention. Irl I have a bit of a reputation for being a puritan. But even I will not blame somebody's entire morality on that, and call a man "evil" for being an addict?! Where is your sympathy?!

Self-destructive behaviour is a major symptom of both head injuries and personality disorders, but I doubt "Tumblr user X" has the thinking skills required to understand that properly.

And either way, even if it was all "his responsibility", so what? That's his personal life, why do you care? If you don't like it, go away.

Again, I genuinely thought people knew how to be sympathetic towards addicts but apparently not.

The emphasis on "self-restraint" is insane, if you had any restraint you wouldn't be bitching on Tumblr. You are sounding more like a 17th century Puritan than me, the person who gets accused irl of acting like one.

People on Tumblr find Junot relatable. That is why he is cute, because he is relatable. Additionally, it is big part of Gen Z humour to call bad men "babygirl" and to combine cutesy aesthetics with dark stuff, hence the whole coquette/girlblogger aesthetic.

Like I said at the beginning of this post - most people do not like Junot. The people who do are mostly mentally ill young people who naturally gravitate towards this "crazy but make it cute" aesthetic tendency, and the "I can make him worse" sort of mentality.

"Violent tendencies" is a lot to extrapolate from a single incident, but that seems to be something you're fond of doing.

You deliberately phrase this to imply sexual harassment. Here is what happened: he flirted with her and invited her to dinner, she had heard the rumours of his mad behaviour and ghosted him, he got very upset. Nothing physical ever happened.

Additionally, none of his mistresses ever mentioned any violent behaviour by him. In fact, in one anecdote related by Laure herself, Junot's Abyssinian mistress Xraxarane encouraged him to shoot an orange off the top of her head because she was so confident in his abilities with a pistol, and even though he knew he could do it, Junot didn't even try because he was too afraid of hurting her.

Do your research before making snarky comments, I am begging you.

While it is true that men wrote more passionately to each other in those days, "I who love you with the affection of a savage for the sun, I who am entirely yours" is not something you would say in passing. I'm not going to argue that Junot and Napoleon did anything romantic together, but it's undeniable that Junot's feelings towards Napoleon surpass those of a completely platonic friendship.

There are many sources that attest to Junot's fanatical devotion being unusual, not just Laure. And it was not a single remark in Laure's memoirs, but many anecdotes. Junot had many close male friendships, but they all took on a very different character to his friendship with Napoleon - his letters to other friends have a casual, jovial tone; the intense and poetic language used in his letters to Napoleon instead mirror his letters to women.

Is it really so unfeasible to you that, out of the thousands of men in the Napoleonic army, one of them might have developed feelings for Napoleon beyond those of conventional masculine friendships? Statistically, it is impossible that every Napoleonic man was straight.

Okay, I am going to be directly bitchy here.

Tumblr user X, YOU DIDN"T EVEN BOTHER TO READ THE JOURNAL INTIME BEFORE PUBLISHING A POST ABOUT THE INCIDENT.

When, in a discord server, I shared a small piece of the journal intime I had translated that was referring to Junot's affair with Caroline, YOU DOUBTED IT"S CREDIBILITY.

You claim to trust what women have to say, BUT YOU DON"T BELEIVE HORTENSE DE BEAUHARNAIS' CLAIMS THAT HER HUSBAND ABUSED HER. BE CONSISTENT.

And finally: THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO MENTION OF JUNOT TRYING TO RAPE LAURE AS YOU CLAIMED. NOWHERE IN HER ACCOUNT OF EVENTS DOES SHE ALLEGE RAPE. STOP MAKING THINGS UP, IT IS DISRESPECTFUL TO REAL RAPE VICTIMS.

You pretend to be diligent with your sources, but you are not, you only read things that support your pre-conceived opinion, you make posts based on false evidence. Shut the fuck up about topics you know nothing about.

Gurl we are not bureaucrats, we do not care about military efficiency.

"glorified cavalry skirmish" - is a group of 500 men defeating a force of 3000 men not glorious to you? Those are odds of five to one.

If you don't care about military history, don't talk about military history and get out of the military history fandom.

10.

(fyi it's spelt crucify)

You are fighting imaginary enemies. Bessieres is adored, he is babygirled. Junot is loathed.

Nobody ever said Junot trying to kill Laure was cute. (I would also provide evidence that Junot never intended to kill her, but then I'll get accused of defending domestic violence)

Junot being babygirlified is not a recent thing. What about:

Rapp, who didn't think Junot was a great soldier but still defended him

Foy, who hated Junot but still wrote positive comments about him in his memoirs

Arthur Wellesley, who respected Junot as an enemy

James Forbes (and many others), who hated Napoleon but praised Junot for being kind to Englishmen in Paris

Antoine-Romain Hamelin, who didn't like most people he met but adored Junot for defending and rescuing him

André Delagrave, who wrote very sympathetically about Junot after serving him in the peninsular wars

Laure's letters

Junot's letters to Laure

Junot's letters to his daughters

+many, many more sources but those were the only ones I remembered off the top of my head.

And please don't disrespect Laure's own wishes and opinions. What about the highly affectionate language used to refer to Junot in her letters about her grief over his death? What about her letter to Berthier complaining about Junot being defamed?

Please be respectful here, I don't want any discourse. I shouldn't have to say this but please do not share this with "Tumblr user X", I don't want to have anything to do with that person ever again.

a little side tangent on the infamous incident between Junot and Laure:

When Junot went to break off his affair with Caroline Murat, he took two duelling pistols and khanjar (a Middle Eastern style of dagger) with him in case he was confronted by Murat and things got messy. This is very important - Junot had lethal weapons easily accessible to him and was willing to use them to kill his rival. So if he genuinely had every intention of murdering Laure, why didn't he shoot her? Why didn't he stab her with the fatal khanjar rather than a pair of scissors? Speculation on this point is useless, but it's vital to know that he could have easily killed her, but he didn't. I'm not defending his actions in any way, Junot certainly did something awful, but he did not intentionally plot to murder her.

#jean andoche junot

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1moreff-creator · 1 year ago

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Happy Birthday Ace Markey!

And happy Halloween! Seems like the character most afraid of everything that moves got the spooky holiday as a birthday! What a silly guy.

Anyways, even though my DRDT’s a bit rusty, I’ll still give a half-baked analysis, fun facts and songs!

(Do keep in mind character analysis is subjective, though!)

-Ace is very unhappy with his life. That much is obvious, as he’s deeply afraid of horses, yet he’s still forced to become the Ultimate Jockey for reasons not yet completely clear.

-He’s claimed his fear diminishes when the time comes for a race, because the thought of losing is scarier than horses to him. That still means he doesn’t practice horse-riding at all, though.

-The constant stress he’s under has even caused his hair to start greying (stated in a QnA), although he dyes it maroon.

-This same stress is likely the reason he always seems to be in fight-or-flight mode. He keeps pretending like he wants to fight people, trying to intimidate them in some way to make himself appear tougher than he is, but always cowers when someone actually tries to take him up on the offer.

-This only gets worse after Levi, the only person Ace had begun to really trust in the killing game, threatens to kill him in the first trial. Ace makes the decision not to trust anyone in the game from that point, which causes him to become even more hostile to compensate for and hide his growing distress.

-Specifically, he begins severely bullying Nico, probably in part because he got Nico's secret and thought he could use that to have power over them. See, if there's one thing Ace really wants, it's control over his situation, seeing as most of his life he's been doing things he doesn't actually want to do. He sees bullying Nico and pushing everyone away as a way of achieving this.

-This ends up exploding when Nico tries to kill him in the gym. Because regardless of what exactly you believe happened there, Nico did admit to trying to take Ace's life. However, Ace's reaction is very different from what we would have expected from him in chapter 1. While before he would have been terrified of Nico and stayed away from them, like he originally did with Xander, now he went out of his way to try and attack Nico even while bleeding pretty profusely. Presumably he's still scared as all hell, but the idea is that by this point he doesn't want his fear to control his actions. He pushes through the fear, like he does while racing, to do what he actually wants to do.

-This is also presumably also why he keeps insulting Nico the day after, and why he returns to the gym (depending on the theory) the night after. He's done being controlled by fear, so he covers it up with as much aggression and petty defiance as he can.

CW Eating disorders

-His motive secret is "Your body is falling apart, but you still refuse to eat." As Veronika mentions, this is possibly because there are strict weight requirements for jockeys. It's also possible this is why his profile states he likes mint, since that can disguise the smell caused by the vomiting associated with certain eating disorders, such as bulimia.

CW Over

-I've implied it before, but his birthday possibly lands on Halloween because fear is a major part of his character.

-The roman numeral associated with him in the LGI MV is V (5), with the phrase "right now, why do you go insane?"

Presumably because he can act kinda crazy at times.

There are also two pieces of bg text.

A cat has 9 additional lives

Presumably because he almost died in the gym, so he has "multiple lives."

I am but mad north-northwest. When the wind is southerly, I know a hawk from a hand saw.

This is a quote from Hamlet (big surprise, I know), where Hamlet claims he's only "mad north-northwest", or rather, only mad on ocassion. Hamlet claims to still have control of his faculties, being able to tell apart a hawk from a hand saw (another bird), a friend from an enemy. For Ace, that means that while he appears crazy at times, he still considers himself in control of hs faculties, still able to see that everyone around him is an enemy (<- he's wrong but he considers himself right).

For some more fun facts:

-The scar on his face comes from jockeying.

-Canonically gay. Unsurprisingly /j

-He likes mint, which is presumably why he smells of menthol... as well as sweat.

-He likes healthy food, and he likes wearing sporty clothes.

-His favorite colors are dark blue and purple, but he refuses to say why. His least favorite color is titian, which is the color of his hair, because he doesn't like himself.

-When asked for his favorite ice cream flavor, he says it's frozen bananas. Not ice cream, actual frozen bananas.

-Like most of the cast, he's right-handed and American.

-He has nine siblings and once had a friend named Taylor.

-He wears heels, as he wishes he was taller most of the time. However, when it comes to jockeying, he'd actually rather be shorter. My guy can't win.

Finally songs that remind me of him:

+Appetite of a People-Pleaser by Ghost & Pals (CW for eating disorders. This song almost feels like it was written for him actually)

+Yesman by NILFRUITS (I think this is his character playlist song, but who knows)

+Reform by QueenPB

+Copycat by CircusP

+God-ish by PinnochioP

+Exorcism by CreepP (CW Abuse, this works with Ace when abstracted a bit)

+Lost One's Weeping by Neru.

+The Things I Deserve by Ghost & Pals (CW suicide)

+Self-Proclaimed Angel by VocaloKAT (this one's on vibes alone)

And Happy Birthday! Happy Halloween also! Take care!

#drdt #danganronpa despair time #ace markey #drdt spoilers #character birthday #i hope this isn't too bad. been a while since i made one of these

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how-serene · 5 months ago

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Dating Headcanons - Eric Binford

Warnings - fluff, tiny bit of angst, nsfw, gn!reader

A/N - rewatched the film recently, had to get this off my chest. First time writing headcanons.

How You Meet (setting the scene) -

You worked behind the snack counter, stuck in a reputative motion of serving popcorn, and cold soft drinks to the never-ending line of patrons. All while wearing the too wide, stretched grin that every staff member adorned throughout the day.

You first meet Eric on a particular slow afternoon, when the floor was mostly deserted of customers. It was Monsters week, in the middle of July. You tried to pass the time, flipping through a magazine while smacking on a cheap piece of pink bubble gum.

Eric was probably already a familiar face to you, and everyone else who worked at the theater. He would come in all hours of the day, usually late afternoons and nights. Although you never had the chance to talk to him.

So when he strolled up to the counter, shifting his gaze to the glass case of over-priced candy, you thought "fuck it." With the agonizingly slow clock counting down your shift, a little conversation wouldn't hurt to help pass the time.

"What can I get you?" you asked, leaning against the glass counter top.

"Just popcorn, please." He replied, fumbling for his wallet.

While you were busy readying the popcorn, you peered over at him.

"So, you here to watch Dracula again?"

He blinked, slowly as if trying to process your question. Then, suddenly you noticed his eyes come to life, like you had slot a coin in a game machine.

"Oh, ah no. I'm actually here to see a showing for Frankenstein."

"With Boris Karloff, right?"

"Yeah, did you know he-

Before you knew it he had talked your ear off for over 30 minutes, missing a majority of the film. In the end, he had timidly asked you out.

You looked over his lanky frame, and poor posture. His brown eyes were dark and bruised, as if he hardly slept.

He was cute, and you couldn't remember the last time you went out on a date with someone.

So, against your better judgment, you slipped him your number.

And the rest was history.

Relationship Headcanons -

okay let's get into it.

♥︎ Eric, undoubtedly, loves movie dates. Whether at home, the cinema or at those dingy drive-in's with shitty speakers. He loves having your warm body curled up into his side, while watching whatever is on screen.

♥︎ This also gives him a chance to ramble, from obscure facts about the film to the passing faces of background actors he happens to know the name of.

♥︎ He was worried at first, that you would find it annoying. People tend to think he talks too much, and often tell him to "shut the fuck up." Over time though, as the relationship progresses, that initial worry subsides.

♥︎ Will take you to new screenings every chance he gets. He has a pre-made list of every movie coming out during a certain month, and dammit he's not missing a single one-

♥︎ Will drive you around town, on the company vespa that he's definitely not borrowing on company time eric please, you're going to get fired-

♥︎ Loves it when you run your fingers through his dirty blonde hair. If you two are in his room, he'll gently place his head in your lap, quietly signaling to you. It helps soothe him to sleep, especially on nights when his insomnia is getting the best of him.

♥︎ Will stay over at your place most nights, to get away from his aunt Stella. Sometimes, after a particularly bad argument with her, he'll show up at your doorstep. Eyes red, and irritated from crying.

♥︎ He confessed to you one night, that he blamed himself for his mother's death (since she died during childbirth.) He was practically curled up in your lap, shoulders shaking from crying so hard.

♥︎ I can see Eric being a cuddly person. Loves it when your arms are wrapped around him, while he rests his head in the crook of your neck. Something about being held, reassures that nagging part of his brain that thinks he's not good enough.

♥︎ He definitely quotes romantic lines from some of his favorite films to you. Some examples -

"Never be jealous again. Never doubt that I love you more than the world. More than myself." Camille, 1936.

"I haven't been afraid since I've known you." Gaslight, 1944.

"You're wonderful. There's a magnificence in you, Tracy." The Philadelphia Story, 1940.

♥︎ Is not typically jealous, but due to being told he's worthless most of the time (from his aunt) I assume he battles with a lot of insecurity. He's not the most striking looking guy, and happens to be a lot smaller and thinner.

♥︎ So there are times when he'll need reassurance that you're there and want to be with him.

NSFW Headcanons -

♥︎ Listen, Eric doesn't have much dating experience meaning there's a good chance he's a virgin when you two get together.

♥︎ He's definitely more of a sub, whining and whimpering constantly when he's beneath you.

♥︎ I imagine him being quiet handsy, grasping at your hips, thighs, waist just trying to feel more of you. His hands tend to shake, more from excitement than overall nerves.

♥︎ He's a little shy to admit it at first, but he would be into roleplaying. Due to his extensive knowledge on films, he has an entire list of scenes from favorite movies of his he wants to 'act out' with you (with his own spin).

♥︎ I can see him taking it seriously, wanting to dress the part and set the mood. Acts as if it's a proper stage production. Will only break character when you're rocking your hips against him, causing him to mewl and buck against you.

♥︎ He can be needy in the bedroom, pleading just to be inside of you or taste you. From his tear stricken face and parted swollen lips, you have a hard time denying him.

♥︎ You dressed up once, as his favorite actor/actress (as a birthday present).

♥︎ Practically fell to your feet, words of praise and adoration falling from his lips.

♥︎ He's a bit of a sloppy kisser at first, as he gets caught in frenzy at the warm feeling of your tongue against his.

♥︎ Is a bit of pervert/creep, if I'm being honest.

♥︎ Has stolen your underwear before when he thought you weren't looking (you were aware, and may or may not have left them out for him to find.)

♥︎ When you're not around, and he's home alone he'll jerk off with your underwear in his hand. The scratchy fabric causing him to shudder and recall past nights with you.

♥︎ Despite this, nothing will ever beat physically having you around (for him to squeeze and hold.)

#dennis christopher #eric binford #eric binford x reader #fade to black 1980 #slashers #slasher x reader #headcanons

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isleofdarkness · 11 months ago

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What were different kids project focuses?

Rose's research paper was on wasp conservation and her "what I want to be" went on about her desire to become a wasp expert and work in conservation.

Ace's research paper was on why wolfdogs and foxes are unethical pets. It wants to own a zoo for abandoned exotic pets and wants to breed certain dog breeds (it is particularly angry about French bulldogs and great danes) to be healthier.

Hadie's research paper was on how the Underworld works with and without xer dad. Their paper was about how, when they grew up, they wanted to help their dad with the Underworld. They have so many good ideas and they would be willing to take over the socializing part for their father because he cannot stand crowds and Olympus in general.

Mal's research paper was on the claw of Chernobyl. She knows so much about the claw. She went and found it and took selfies of herself sitting in it with the radiation alarm flipping out. She wants to open a series of hospitals for kids with severe issues- emotionally disturbed, RAD, homicidal, etc- a bit like a home for disturbed kids. Only she will actually try to help the kids rather than lock them away from public view. She's gonna hire nurses for the staff and will treat the patients like people. She hopes to get more research done towards rehabilitation of these patients, or at least ways to give them a higher quality of life. She saw Children of Darkness and lost her entire mind.

Mischa's paper was about his beloved siblings, about how he raised them and fought with everything he had to keep them alive. He wants to open a charity to help people out of sex work. On the Isle, almost all sex workers are there because it's either that or starve. So he wants to set up a shelter where they can stay. It would have doctor services and a bunch of programs to help people learn a skill so they won't have to go back into sex work, as well as helping them on their way to independence. There would be an open door policy, too. If someone who previously stayed found themselves in the "sell yourself or starve" situation again, they're always welcome back. He doesn't want anyone to be forced to go through what he went through.

Ivy' paper was on Diego, Veronica, and Carlos, and how proud she was of all of them. She wants to set up rehabs focused on children and teens, because most rehabs are geared towards adults. That's not good for the kids who desperately need help and she's going to do something to fix it.

Evie's report was on Ash, on how loving that little girl taught her to love herself as she was. She wants to own a fashion line that trains and employs the impoverished and people who struggle to get a job. She's also going to hire diverse models because everyone deserves to see someone like them on a magazine, and she already has several accessible lines drawn out (such as the magnet closures that make it easier for Riah to dress.) No one should be forced to wear something they hate just because they can't wear anything else. Self-expression is for everyone.

Jay's paper was about his cousin Jade, who he loves like a sister, and the aunt and uncle who were far better parents than his father. His goal is to do major league tourney so that no one he loves will ever have to worry about money. His main worry was he wanted Ruby to have the medical care he may need, and doctors are expensive. But he'll find a way to pay for it.

Claudine's paper was about a sister she refused to name but clearly loved to pieces, and how much she owed her sister, how much she wanted to see her again. She and Rick Ratcliffe plan to make a charity for religious abuse survivors to help them live a good life after their trauma. RA trauma can be so insidious but so few talk about it, so they're gonna do something about it.

Gil wrote about his sisters, some brothers, and his siblings who are not really either one. His plan is to work with LeFou and continue helping disabled children. There's not really much else he can do. Oh, and he wants gender-affirming surgery and for his siblings (most of them) to be safe and happy.

Carlos wrote about Diego, Ivy, and Veronica, about how much he owed them and how they refused to let him pay for any of it. Ivy and Diego are the reason he made it past age two. He doesn't care what he does when he's grown, as long as he's with them.

I'll reblog with some others during intermission

#stargirl1331 #the darkness speaks

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bobbasmultiverse · 1 year ago

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strawberries & cigarettes

3. wow.

warnings: smoking, drinking, late night ramyeon & icecream (a/n: i'm kinda hungry rn), friendly threats

you giggled loudly, leaning onto the man beside you as your mind basically swayed inside your head. it was all so fuzzy, sunshine and rainbows basically with your favourite ice cream cone in hand, and, you could swear, the funniest man alive next to you.

minho chuckled at you, him being a bit tipsy, and you almost completely drunk out of your mind. you couldn't really remember how you got to the empty parking lot with a convenience store behind you, waiting till you both finished your ice creams to get some ramyeon, all you remember is liking whatever the hell it was that wonwoo gave you and getting refills and spending the whole time with minho as you did so.

your phone vibrated in your pocket, snapping you out of your drunk daze as you pouted at the caller ID, not even bothering to read it before you declined the call and tossed your phone aside.

“we should get you home.” minho stated, biting off the cone as he turned to you. you nodded with a sigh, standing up from the pavement and dusting off your jeans.

“let’s get the ramyeon first.” you urged him, walking back in inside the convenience store. minho stared at your retreating back before turning to your forgotten phone, grabbing it with him, then following after you.

you two prepared the ramyeon pretty quickly, returning to your designated spot after you’d each paid for your food. you stirred it around for a bit, sitting in a comfortable silence with minho while you enjoyed your midnight snack. you realized that you’d sobered up a bit by then, looking around the unknown place before turning to your fellow classmate.

“do you know the way to building 1 from here?” you questioned, slurping up some noodles before taking a sip from the freshly opened can of beer.

minho hummed, swallowing down his own food before pointing in a certain direction. “it’s ten minutes straight over there.”

you nodded at him before a frown overtook your features. “don’t you live the other way?”

minho’s expression matched yours, apparently a bit more than tipsy since that piece of information completely escaped his mind. “oh...yeah, i do.” he puckered his lips in thought.

you were drunk, yes, but you still had some chivellary in you and you’re not having him walk twice the distance, plus having a male walk you back won’t help with the girl crush concept you’re trying to build around on campus.

“i’ll call an uber, don’t worry.” you lied smoothly, smiling lightly at minho. he side eyed you slightly before turning back to his food and nodding to himself.

he tried to stay with you till the uber arrived, he really did, but you threatened to put a cigarette out on his face, kindly, of course, and he couldn’t afford losing his appeal, so he walked away with a warning that if you didn’t answer his texts or calls he’d be coming over and asking one of his law majored friends to sue you, even if you’d died. you just shooed him off, picking out your cigarette pack and lighting one up.

you absolutely had no uber coming for you. you’re very much alone in this place, and you’re not sure if you can get to the dorms from here.

“hey.” your head whipped towards the caller, frowning at the person as you quickly stood up from your spot, swaying slightly with a cigarette tucked between your lips as you readied yourself for a possible fist fight.

the man raised his hands up in the air, indicating that he meant no harm to you. “you okay?”

you frowned at him, a pout coming onto your lips as you sat back down in your seat, shaking your head at him. “i don't know the way home from here.”

he almost chuckled at you before he very slowly approached you and sat down next to you. “don't you have anyone you can call?” he asked, looking at you as you fumbled in your pockets in search of your phone before fishing it out, only to find it dead.

you'd sighed, placing it on the pavement next to you before shaking your head at him. “i don't remember my brother's phone number right now.” you added, grabbing your lighter from your pocket and lighting your cigarette up, only to find that your lighter was also dead and refused to ignite a small spark for you.

you turned to the nice stranger sitting down next to you. even through your hazy mind, he was too pretty for you to comprehend it. his hair was long, shaped in a long mullet that almost reached his shoulders, and his eyes were shaped so beautifully, you couldn't even explain it, and his plump lips were a whole other-

a harsh smack came onto your cheek as your eyes widened and you awoke from your trance. you'd slapped yourself, yes. but it was for good reason.

you turned to the man again, this time with a purpose, completely missing the amused look on his face. “do you have a lighter?” you asked. your words were slurred, but he still caught them.

he smiled lightly at you before muttering a quiet 'stay here', and then he disappeared inside the store, coming out only a minute later and plopping down next to you.

"even though i don't like smoking…" he sighed, handing you a lighter as you grinned happily at the man, dimples appearing in your cheeks before you lit up your cigarette, taking in a long drag, hollowing your cheeks out before you pulled back, blowing the smoke out into the midnight air.

"do you know where you live?"

you'd nodded absentmindedly, pointing in the general direction of your apartment building where you're staying with your friends and family next door. "it's building 1."

he smiled brightly at you, two dimples of his own showing. "i have a few friends who live there."

"really?" your eyes widened as you explained, shock visible all over your face. "who are they?"

he chuckled, before coming up with a bottle of water out of nowhere. "maybe i'll tell you if you sober up a bit."

you'd pouted at that, but you didn't sober up to the extent where he'd tell you, but he still walked you to your dorm building, and you only remembered to thank him and ask about his name as you punched the wrong passcode on the keypad.

but, maybe you'd meet another time.

bonus

previous | masterlist | next

pairing: kwon soonyoung x wonwoo's sister!oc, xu minghao x wonwoo's sister!oc (ft. SVT)

genre: college au, love triangle, brother's bestfriend, fwb, angst, fluff

synopsis: two minor, what you'd call, incidents, lead up to the craziest few months of your life, where you make friendships and break some and you end with having to make the craziest choices of your life; to be young and free forever, or to have the best love of all time.

bobba talks | just had the worst bio exam of my life 😍 but there you guys go...but it's getting steamy, isn't it? 🤭

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the-darkness-does-not-bargain · 2 years ago

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splitting up a bit of immortal roomies stuff like kitkats because the tonal differences were getting on my nerves a bit, so incoming

been rotating around how immortals au ava must lowkey be so unhinged, like she’s immortal, has millenia of know how, is vv unafraid to break laws, nd she can heal from 98% of things, she absolutely has a very broken sense of danger and her own mortality, and she tries and/or does so many dumb and risky stuff

not in a self destructive way necessarily and mainly, she just thinks stuff like huh what would it feel like if i jumped into this super shallow area of water from this cliff, what’d happen if i microwaved some sticks of dynamite, etc

wait i’m immortal, i can heal from most anything that goes wrong, i can try that right now

beatrice’s worst mistake is teaching ava how to surf the internet (somewhat, even beatrice can’t work miracles) and navigate youtube, because there’s so many risky or dumb ideas out there for ava to stumble onto and try

ava probably loves all the videos that’re like “dropping x from y height” “putting x in a grinder” “plopping x in acid” etc videos

semi related, also been thinking, do you think ava can heal wrong? Like are there nerves that grow back wrong because they weren’t aligned properly when they were exposed or something, what should be one bone that was broken into two splinters growing back into two full different bones, etc

and while a majority of that can be corrected, she probably has pain from the stuff that couldn’t be because these pieces of shrapnel are way too small and too embedded to be taken out of ava unless they’re gonna cut up every single inch of her for the shrapnel,

and like maybe even the fully healed stuff has wear and tear on ava still, she has a bone deep sense of tiredness that never fully goes away and/or phantom pains are a thing that happens a buch

Ooo, yes, 100%, Ava is a lunatic. She's just good at concealing that fact in polite company. She gives me so many Doctor Who vibes, like all the weird funny moments where the Doctor eats rocks or sends the TARDIS dropping out the sky. Ava has definitely tried to do an Assassin's Creed Leap of Faith into a hay bale to see if it would work (it really, really didn't). More than the internet, the real worst mistake Beatrice makes is showing Ava Mythbusters.

I don't know if she ever heals wrong necessarily??? but I think certain injuries have a way of sticking with her anyway. Almost like psychosomatic pains from injuries that were especially traumatic, perhaps. I'm imagining her discovering her immortality after she was potentially cut in half??? She regrew everything, but when something triggers her, she might feel echoes of that pain.

And yeah, if she has shrapnel or whatever stuck somewhere they can't easily reach, it will hurt as long as it stays there. I'm sure Lilith has at one point or another performed improvised surgery to remove cannon fragments or tiny musket balls from Ava in the past, often having to do a lot more damage and being forced to wait it out as Ava heals from the new injuries.

#warrior nun #immortal roommates au #ava silva

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magic-polygon · 2 years ago

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How to avoid AI art on DeviantArt

Although I don't upload on DeviantArt anymore, I still go on there to look for new artwork, especially from those I follow, and add to my Favorites.

That said, it's become increasingly difficult to find new artists to support because it seems like the majority of new uploads are AI generated images.

So, for those of you who still use DA and are looking for quality art to view and artists to support, I put together a handy list of things to watch out for. Things to help you make sure that you're not inadvertently supporting an AI "artist."

Accounts created within the last two years. In other words, accounts that popped up just as these AI technologies started to take off, because that's when they decided to try becoming an "artist" themselves. The shorter the account age, the more suspicious you should be.

Galleries with large amounts of uploads submitted within a short time frame. It's easy to submit a whole bunch of images when you don't have to manually paint each one and just have the AI program create them for you. Especially look out for those with multiple images that look very similar to each other; they're all alternate versions of the same AI prompt. Conversely, images that look VERY different from each other and have no consistent style are another obvious sign that the uploaders didn't make anything themselves and are just using various prompts.

Uploads with generic titles, or titles that sound like keywords being strung together. In some cases, they may literally just be using their AI prompts as the titles. In others, the titles may even sound like random computer file names, because that's basically what they are and the uploader isn't making much of an effort to hide that.

Uploads with minimal tags or descriptions, or none at all. Most actual artists who take hours to create a new piece would have something to say about the process, their thoughts about the image, or what the piece was for. AI uploaders just generate and upload, and thus usually have nothing to say about it.

Conversely, uploads that actually mention in the tags or descriptions that they are AI generated. This seems to be happening less often as certain bad actors want the reputation of being a great artist while hiding the fact that they didn't actually make any of their images. However, if you take a few seconds to look for these things, some of them may still give it away. Keep an eye out for AI generator names like Midjourney, Stable Diffusion, Artbreeder, and so on. Also, some uploaders will actually mention AI in their username.

Images of characters from the waist up, but very few full-body ones. AI generators seem to favor faces over other parts of the body. As a result, most galleries of AI character art will consist entirely of portraits. Bonus points if there are no hands. Also be on the lookout for images where the shading is a bit too smooth on the face, and where the quality starts to dip the further away from the face you get.

Male users. This may seem random and arbitrary, but seriously, since the beginning when crypto and NFTs first became widespread, it was men who were the primary consumers of this technology. There's a reason they're called cryptoBROs after all. In fact, a lot of AI users are part of this same exact crowd. Even more of a reason to stay away from AI art. But you will always be able to tell when a man is uploading AI images because of the way he writes and interacts online. They are very dry, minimalist, transactional, and often shady or even perverted (how many AI images are there of the "sexy girl with big boobs" type by now?).

Lastly, here's a handy journal by Stop-AI-replace with some tags you can block, plus how to make DA stop recommending AI art to you on the home page. Sadly it won't work for every image ever, but it's a good start:

That's all for now. As usual, certain images have that particular style that you can just tell at a glance could only come from an AI program, but some uploaders have been going to great pains to try to hide it the best they can. Don't get duped!

#fuck ai art #ai art is not art #deviantart #say no to ai art #ai art is theft #ai artists are thieves #ai artists are not artists #support real artists #supporting artists #fuck deviantart #ai art is not real art #don't support ai artists

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thespoonisvictory · 2 years ago

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I posted 5,874 times in 2022

1,359 posts created (23%)

4,515 posts reblogged (77%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@firesnap

@thespoonisvictory

@surreal-static

@geoguessbur

@snailsnfriends

I tagged 3,314 of my posts in 2022

Only 44% of my posts had no tags

#asks - 426 posts

#d20 - 182 posts

#acofaf - 168 posts

#fav - 127 posts

#exu:c - 54 posts

#critical - 50 posts

#spoon rambles - 39 posts

#prev - 34 posts

#^^^ - 31 posts

#neverafter - 30 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#like yes niki enjoys a good drawn out seagull eating bit and phil will do unhinged tts but who else would rp being stuck in a public library

My Top Posts in 2022:

ok fine I’ll say it. a good portion of dsmp streamers don’t care about the story and maybe arguably they never understood the enormity of what certain people on that server were trying to create, the integrity they were trying to maintain in it. they see clicks, engagement, and an endlessly appeased fanbase that will accept infinite promises and excuses, and as long as you still click on that stream they aren’t going to care. the farthest a good half of them got was “this seems cool” and then they streamed it and we took that and wrote fun analysis and did fanart. and as long as we all know that and accept that george and sapnap do not care or even understand why tommy’s house is so important, that’s fine. as long as we get that certain streamers only bring it up to promote merch and others only bring it up to pull attention back, and we agree to watch anyway because it’s fun, that’s fine.

but it breaks my heart seeing fans confused and heartbroken because they have to keep realizing that the vast majority of these guys don’t care about this server in that way anymore

1,528 notes - Posted June 27, 2022

the manburg arc being set during the transition from fall to winter like ok you hadestown over the garden wall bitch you really thought of everything didn’t you

1,850 notes - Posted April 26, 2022

I enjoy period accurate costuming but people who get mad at inaccurate but absolutely intentional choices in period pieces drive me up the wall

2,773 notes - Posted April 2, 2022

the new minecraft lore is like:

there are no mobs in the cities. something is stopping them; something is either killing them or maybe even they know not to venture down there, that it’s too dangerous.

but down there, there are candles. there are wool pathways. there are redstone lamps. whatever civilization lived down there was smart, much more advanced than villagers. they had thick walls, and figured out that wool kept Wardens away, and made enchantments to allow them to run quickly and quietly. they had nether blocks, basalt and soul fire, and their buildings nearly resemble nether fortresses, or bastions. there were whole communities that thrived in spite of the threat, until they didn’t, of course.

did they live in fear of the Warden? if so, why didn’t they leave? could they leave? did they try to make a portal to do just that? their cities are intricate and their floors are lined with wool that children could run across and stumble over without worry and did they whisper, constantly? did they teach children legends of the beasts that would come if they didn’t quiet down? did the children believe them? did they make candles on holidays and dare each other to set the skulk sensors off with small dripstone pieces? did they keep bees, or did they ration their wax carefully, trying to learn the secrets of redstone and soul fire to keep their lanterns burning before they ran out? how far did they get in their knowledge? why didn’t they leave? what were they staying for, what were they trying to find with that portal?

why didn’t they leave?

5,025 notes - Posted February 18, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I just. maybe I should be mad but I’m not. Wilbur Soot is a cunt and this was a story about suicide and blue sheep and sunrises and utah and I love that he took a deliberate move to make it campy and insane and like all of the most memorable bits from this stupid server it is full of heart! his mom is a fridge! he fucked a salmon! tragedy and grief render everything around them obscene and hilarious and the fact that this story ended in such a silly way is the ultimate fuck you to c!wilbur’s mindset that he is some ultimate dramatic evil. the world is ridiculous! you have to forgive yourself! suck it green boy!

7,567 notes - Posted September 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #enjoy

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sydneycs118 · 1 year ago

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Dating Post Eating Disorder

As a therapy exercise, I wrote this little ditty - just putting it out into the void! Seeing if others relate :)

DATING POST EATING DISORDER

Disclaimer from author: This piece is not mental health advice, nor is it meant to be a judgment on living with an eating disorder or anything like that. This is just a story about me.

My therapist says I’m part of a “silent majority”. People who struggle with an eating disorder without ever addressing it and instead learn to work around it, for years – decades, even. They never properly deal with it though. Like an annoying ankle weight you can never quite shake off.

But it wasn’t just an annoying ankle weight for me – I see that now. With the benefit of therapy, I have realized that my eating disorder has had a huge influence in shaping who I am, how I see myself and so many other facts about me. Something I’m working hard in therapy to unpack and rebuild, bit by bit.

For the purposes of this piece, however, I want to talk about dating.

I didn’t start dating until I was well into my twenties, and even then, I was constantly getting in my own way, holding myself back, and pushing men away because it was easier and safer to stay by myself. The thought of someone really seeing me (emotionally or physically) had been such an unpalatable concept to me, I couldn’t even bear to think about it. That’s embarrassing to admit, but it’s true.

During those early days, several men told me that I’m “emotionally unavailable” or that they “couldn’t read me”. They were right. Some of them were real jerks about it, but they were right. I had managed to start dating, but I hadn’t learned to do it in healthy way.

The years kept passing. My friends were getting married, settling down, having babies. Having second and third babies. All while I kept feeling like the romantic and sexual equivalent of a teenager. Like I was falling behind and missing out on these things because I couldn’t get it together to even successfully date – let alone build a life with someone.

Don’t get me wrong, I was so happy for my friends but I also felt bad about myself. And then I felt shitty for making it about me. A vicious cycle that made me feel worse and worse.

So once I hit my early thirties, I finally, finally started seeing a therapist.

I won’t try and recount everything my therapist has helped with – therapy takes years for a reason. One of the (many) lessons I’ve learned is to let go of the “should”. It doesn’t matter what society says you should do, or your parents, or your friends, or even yourself. Your story might be different, or unconventional, or have different milestones. None of that matters at all. What matters is living right by yourself.

It took years, but I eventually figured out how freeing that is. When you let go of expectations – everything opens up and your options expand ten-fold. More importantly, when you let go of expectations, you let go of the corresponding stress too. It’s the best.

I started to try and incorporate that thinking. I went on tons of first dates, kept an open mind and didn’t hesitate to say my goodbyes if their values didn’t align with my own.

I also tried new things that I never thought I would try. Earlier this year, I entered into a casual relationship. I had never had one before, being certain I wasn’t the type and couldn’t handle it. To my surprise, it was far easier than I thought. With no expectations and knowing we would never have a future reduced the self-imposed pressure I put on myself. Being intimate with someone when you don’t care what they think about your body turned out to be, at least for me, incredibly freeing.

Ultimately, after about four months, he ghosted me. While I was annoyed at the discourtesy, I was pleasantly surprised to find that I felt nothing else about it. I had had no expectations. I hadn’t thought I was capable of a casual relationship. Turns out I am - and it was fine. And fun.

Since then, I’ve been on a few first dates from the apps. I even attended a singles speed dating event. The only guy I clicked with was a hilarious man in his forties who was a good 8-9 inches shorter than me. I was initially not going to say yes to him for that very reason, but then said “to hell with it”. I was shocked to find he matched with me too, despite our respective vertical challenges. It never materialized into anything, but I think our each saying “yes” was us both at least trying to be brave.

I still struggle. Recently I attended my good friend’s wedding. Despite all my progress with my eating disorder over recent years, that night I felt ugly and uncomfortable in my dress and instantly reverted back to that person who hates herself. I wanted to go back to the hotel and hide.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I caught the intrusive thought before it took control over me (therapy works!), I let go of it and committed to being my best self. I gave 110% on the dance floor, was sociable with everyone and helped close the bar down at 2am. I had an excellent time.

My friend deserved that from me, but - more importantly - I deserved that from me.

Letting go of expectations has been the best thing I’ve done for myself. I’m not husband-hunting. I may meet someone, I may not. I’m happy and successful either way. I may have children, or I may simply remain a badass aunt and godmother.

Any of these options are fine with me.

So long as I’m respecting others and myself – I’m free to do whatever the hell I want.

There was a quote from a cute romance novel called “Part of Your World” that resonated with me. “Give zero f*cks … when you don’t care, everything’s on your terms. They can take it or leave it. [Everyone else’s response] doesn’t matter to you, so ask for whatever the hell you want.”

If you are struggling with an eating disorder, contact a local mental health professional and seek support. I wish I had done it sooner!

#mental health #mental heath support #mental wellbeing #mental wellness #eating disoder recovery #tw disordered eating #disordered eating mention #disordered eating in tags #tw eating issues #bulimia #dating #online dating #dating apps #dating advice #relationship advice #abby jimenez #part of your world #writing exercise

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talkintrashcann · 2 years ago

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Nightly swim - Xavier Thorpe

Summary: The nightshades invite you to a campfire hangout, but plans get thrown overboard and you end up going for a nightly swim in the lake, in the arms of someone else to be exact. 🫧

Warnings: undressing but still having underwear on, kissing, a moan here and there, little bit spicy and suggestive at the end, let me know if i missed any

Word count: 1.2k

A/N: im so happy with the way this turned out omg, although i wasn't sure if this was a good idea at first but a new friend on here encouraged me to make it and post it even when i was doubting myself. i might make a spicy part 2 if anyone would be interested in that, please let me know if that's what you want!

Requests: definitely always welcome, it would honestly help me out a lot if anyone did so don't be afraid to ask for anything!

———————

Being part of the nightshades has it's pros and cons, a pro is that you get to do fun activities with a group of friends without being on Weems' rader. Such as rooftop parties, campouts, game nights and even activities that include cocktails. A con would be that even if that said activity wasn't your thing, you'd still get dragged to these private events by the other members of your secret society. And during the last nightshades meeting, the majority of the group voted for a campfire near the lake at nighttime. With snacks and drinks, confessions and games, blankets and cushions. You weren't sure about going since you were a fairly new member of the nightshades, but Ajax and Divina basically begged you to come. You couldn't say no to them, sometimes you hate how convincing they can be. But there might also be another reason why you didn't protest. Or should I say, a certain someone?

"Can you pass the marshmallows again?", Kent shouted to Yoko. A bag of marshmallows flying from one side of the fire to the other, the bag landing directly onto Kent's face, the group bursting out into laughter. Admittedly, this is actually way more fun than you thought it would be. The ambiance was perfect, everyone was chatting with each other and cracked a few jokes here and there. All while the campfire could be heard crackling in the background, with the moonlight reflecting on the lake near you. It was mesmerizing to look at, you couldn't help but feel drawn to the water. And apparently you weren't the only one that felt that way.

"What would you guys say to having a nightly swim in the lake over there? Could be fun don't you think?", Yoko suggested while the others nodded enthusiastically at the idea. They were already getting up from their place, taking off most of their clothing pieces, leaving them in nothing but their underwear. Moving over to the lake, they dipped their toes into the water while shivering from cold sensation, their full body following soon after. You had some doubts about taking off your clothes with everyone around you, waiting for the others to get in the water first before getting undressed yourself. You considered staying near the campfire but made up your mind pretty quickly once you thought it would be better to join them than to be left alone in the woods, finding it a little scary to be left behind in the dark.

Once your clothes were neatly folded on one of the blankets, you took a step into the lake. A chilling sensation going over you, making you rethink your decisions. You wanted to get out of the water and put your clothes on again. But there was no way back when you suddenly felt a hand grab yours and pull you with them into the deep cold water, looking up to see Xavier dragging you with him. You could barely see the huge grin on his face because the only source of light was that of the moon, but that was enough to accentuate his facial features (and maybe some other features as well). All the others were standing a bit further away from the two of you, splashing each other with water and pulling their friends under the surface of the water. Some might actually be trying to drown each other by the looks of it.

You reached a spot in the lake where it was difficult for you to stand, trying to keep your head above the water was becoming a little exhausting. You knew how to swim, but you weren't prepared on swimming in water this cold with nothing but your underwear on. Xavier on the other hand didn't experience any issues with standing normally due to his height. He could tell you were struggling to keep your head above the surface, so he tried to support you by wrapping his hands around your bare waist. Your heart skipped a beat at his touch, unknowingly holding your breath as you looked into his pretty eyes. His eyes were looking down at you with adoration, like he was looking at the prettiest thing he's ever seen. Which was exactly what went through his mind, wanting this moment to last forever.

As you were still struggling to stay afloat, Xavier grabbed the back of your thighs underwater and secured your legs around his waist. His right hand resting on your left side while the other one was placed on your lower back. His sudden movement took you by surprise, your hands ending up on his bare chest and neck. You had never been this close with him before, but you didn't mind the position you were in right now.

You could feel the growing tension between you, neither of you saying a word. It started to become a staring contest, seeing whoever would break the eye contact first. But you never did, you were just admiring the other in silence. He looks gorgeous under the moonlight, not thinking it was possible for him to look even better than he usually does. His hair was loose, the ends wet from the lake. You could see water droplets running down his neck and down to his chest, swallowing the lump in your throat at how hot this made him look.

"Did I ever tell you how pretty you are?", Xavier was the first to break the silence. He didn't mean to say that out loud, but he had no regrets when he saw your reaction to his words. Even without much light, it was noticable that you were blushing. You could feel your entire body heating up at his words, wondering if he could feel it too. The staring contest came to an end when Xavier looked down at your lips for a couple of seconds, immediately looking back into your glinstering orbs.

"You have no idea of how bad I want to kiss you right now.", he admits. Sending butterflies to your stomach.

"What are you waiting for?", you respond boldly. Causing him to smash his soft lips onto yours, immediately kissing him back equally needy. Your hands had a mind of their own, finding their way to his half wet hair. His own hands pressing your chest against his more, roaming your back while his other hand squeezed your thigh. You let out a quiet moan into the kiss, feeling him grin against your lips. You felt his tongue touching your bottom lip, asking for entrance. Which you were more than happy to grant. You had both been craving for this to happen one day, without even knowing that feeling was mutual. The longer it went on, the needier you got. Desperate sounds left your lips as the kiss got more intense by the minute.

The kiss went on for what felt like hours, catching the attention of the nightshades eventually. They couldn't really see what was going on between you two, but it seemed like an innocent kiss from their perspective. The question is: Was that truly all that happened?

Part two? 🫧

#xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe fanfic #xavier thorpe x you #xavier thorpe imagine #xavier thorpe wednesday #xavier thorpe x reader #wednesday fanfic #wednesday imagine #wednesday #xavier fanfic

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the-far-bright-center · 2 years ago

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Definitely my target audience—thanks for responding! :')

As you can probably tell, I’m an Anakin fan and thus focus on Prequels/Clone Wars era a lot, but I’m also a lifelong OT fan and die-hard believer in its happy and transcendent ending. I personally don’t have any interest in continuing the story beyond RotJ (because I view the Skywalker saga as Anakin’s story, and once he dies and brings balance to the Force, the story is over). That being said, I’m cool with things like Han and Leia’s kids from the Expanded Universe, and prefer that infinitely to anything in the fake-sequels.

I totally understand that a lot of fans have things they can handle when it comes to Disney SW, and then things they can’t, and we all have to find our happy place. Even though I had major problems with Disney’s interpretation of SW ever since TFA, I didn't immediately forgo all Disney material right away. I’d already been watching Rebels for a year before TFA came out (at the time, I’d assumed that Rebels was the only way we’d ever get resolution for certain Clone Wars characters), and I stuck with it until midway through the final season (when I became too annoyed by certain elements and quit). In contrast, Rogue One was something I’d dreaded initially as it was the first live-action entry post-TFA, but Carrie Fisher’s death led me to watch it as I needed some kind of closure (especially after the horrible memory of TFA), and thankfully I didn’t regret it. Rogue One worked so well for one simple reason: it respected the saga. It even incorporated themes from the iconic RotS novelisation by Matthew Stover—the entire film was one big riff on the famous ‘in the heart of its strength lies its weakness’ and ‘love can ignite the stars’ lines. In this way, it acted as thematic link between the PT and OT. If anything, Rogue One should have been the film that Disney started with, imo. And they should have made it into essentially an ‘interquel’ trilogy of films (followed by Rogue Two and Rogue Three). That way, they could have had their precious ‘nostalgic’ Dark Times aesthetics without having to reset the entire galaxy and destroy two whole trilogies of storyline and character arcs just to have an excuse to use the throwback visuals they wanted. Sigh…

But everything else since those two things I have completely ignored. I won’t get into detail here about why, but ultimately I just can’t trust Disney with ANY part of SW anymore, and it makes me physically ill whenever they co-opt yet another favourite character or story element into their fake version of events. So, unfortunately at this point I can’t handle any of it, and that includes the Obi-Wan show and Mandalorian. If others enjoy those, great, but for me…the more that the Disney content messes with my fave characters, the more I need to stay far away from it. I’ve refused to watch a single piece of Disney SW media since early 2018 for this reason, despite multiple people practically begging me to, and honestly I think it’s the best decision I’ve ever made for my own sanity.

The downside is that for years now I’ve been almost completely alienated from the SW fandom, but I’m trying to remedy that a bit by more actively reaching out to likeminded fans. Thanks for reaching back. :)

Looking for fellow non-Disney SW blogs

Tumblr is getting very lonely these days, and I'm looking for Star Wars blogs that don't post the non-stop stream of Disney content (and/or that only post it minimally and tag it well enough that it can be filtered easily).

I crave fandom interaction but it's almost impossible these days to find SW blogs that ignore Disney. Since this year is the 40th (!) anniversary of Return of the Jedi, it would be nice to be able to celebrate with fans who share my view of it as the true ending of the Skywalker saga.

#anti disney #pro lucas saga

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elshouldbeasleeprn · 4 years ago

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rambling about cringe interest under the cut (i didn’t realize how long this was going to get so the first sentence below the cut is essentially the same as that one shhhh)

last post about the cringe interest i prommy but i have been watching niki’s dsmp vods and thinking So Hard about c!niki to the point where her character development and arcs might be some of my favorite ever. specifically her like. relationships with people and how they fall into a sort of before and after. how her friendship with wilbur morphed into something one sided (her seeing him as her friend instead of a president, him seeing her as part of l’manberg instead of niki. i can’t remember it verbatim, but that bit of dialogue where niki says she’ll fight for him and he says he needs her to fight for l’manberg) and then flipped after his death (niki disregarding ghostbur, niki being one of ghostbur’s strong memories). how seeing the ghost of her dead friend who betrayed her and her family as his last act, and how she lashed out on the closest living counterpart to him (tommy). how the person she had the closest thing to a romantic relationship with saw the betrayal she was feeling towards tommy and how that directly juxtaposed her care for him and how that hurt their relationship. how she healed and found a family that sees her as a person instead of part of a nation, and how she’s found solace in the complete opposite of where she’s started. when i first heard the ‘i started baking again’ line i cried for an hour can you tell

(also, watching nov 16th from niki’s pov is like. Essential. it’s wilbur’s thing and i’m not trying to take away from that but there’s this moment after wilbur presses the button and the withers all spawn where the last remaining members of l’manberg are huddled around the l’mantree and it’s used as a symbol of l’manberg, of what it’s been through, of who it is as a people and watching niki use it as a place of solace all the while knowing she’ll burn it down was a sucker punch)

#exposing myself on the sideblog tonight #ik i only reblog it once in a blue moon on main but i am like. Into this atm #certain bits and pieces and i try to stay away from the majority of the fandom at all costs but like. i have a sticker on my laptop

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dream-inwriting · 3 years ago

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Just Stay

Pairing: Steven Grant x reader; Marc Speector x reader Warning: Major Fluff, angst???????, Violence. mentions of blood Word Count: 5k(yea, no idea how that happened) Summary: You have been dating Marc and Steven for some time now. You know all the complicated things about Khonsu and his delightful acts of vengeance. As you've been helping Marc and Steven try to wiggle out of this deal, this particular mission of Khonsu's ensues more danger than any of them thought. Causing you to dabble in picking up the Moon Knight mantle.

Authors Note:

I have not wrote in a long, long time. But I hope this is somewhat good. I will be writing more(shorter) pieces but I thought about how this would be a small cool beginning. It turned into something I didn't realize. Anyway, if you could be kind and make requests that would be amazing.

Laters, Gators.

----------

The alarm rings loud enough to wake-up everyone from here to America, I swear. I reach up and slam the snooze button before cuddling back into the sleepy beautiful man next to me.

We should get up." Marc mumbles and begins to pull out of my embrace.

"Noooooo." My grip on Marc's torso tightens, I am not leaving this bed. I could sleep for eternity. His small laugh melts my body. "No one needs work."

"I beg to differ."

I slowly open an eye to peak at him. Him and his greek gorgeous body barely covered by the blankets could make anyone swoon. The muscles hidden beneath velvety soft skin, I run my hand up past his chest to tangle in his hair. He leans into the touch. Oh, Oh, he wants to stay. "I have a strong argument against that."

He closes his eyes and sighs, "I know you do. I know you do, baby."

We stay like this for a few more moments. The word 'stay' yells throughout my mind, my body. Just stay. I open my mouth to demand he do just that when I'm interrupted.

"Steven will be late to work, it's his time to shine." Marc mocks referring to the deal between Steven and him. They both try to adhere to a scheduled agreement of who has control of the body. Try. Meaning whatever Khonsu's kicked up always knocks the 'oh-so-perfect' schedule out of reach.

"How about Steven calling into work. Could we pencil that in?"

Marc huffs a small laugh but doesn't say anything. Marc not saying anything is as a close to a yes as any. No denial, no argument. Maybe he is actual going to call in-

"We'd love to stay in, yeah? But Donna will be off her rocker-"

I gaze into those wonderfully curious eyes, Stevens' eyes. The harmonious heart beat beneath my ear quickens, smiling softly I hold his attention.

"No. No. Don't-Don't look at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Oh, Oh. You know what you're doing, don't you, love? Giving me that smile and those gorgeous eyes."

"I-I have no idea what you are talking about." I fight to hide any other dead give aways in to what it is I am 'doing'.

Steven stares for a moment longer. I bring my thumb to trace his lips, soft and sweet. I move his falling curls off his eyes and cup his cheek, bringing my mouth closer to his but to kiss one corner of his lips. Hovering closer to kiss him fully I quickly move to the other corner of his lips smiling a bit, teasing him. I act like I'm going to really kiss him this time. I make my way leaning fully over him. Sliding my legs over his hips nearly chest to chest. My heart beat barks against my rib cage so much so that I'm 100% certain Steven can hear it. I can feel his arm move across my waist and the other griping my shoulder. I lean down to kiss his lips but move quickly to kiss his cheek.

"Alright, you. Enough teasing, now." Steven laughs as he rolls me onto my back and uses his elbows to prop himself up and stare down at me, "What did I do to deserve you?"

I shrug best I can, "Became my savior in flannel of a truly boring museum tour guide." Stay.

"You should right in a review, yeah. Tell Donna all-all about how I wooed you over talking about the-the Duat. Real winner I am."

"First place in my heart." I grin while rubbing his arms. Just ask him, just ask him to stay. Stay. "I love you."

Stevens bright smile returns as he leans down till he hovers just a fraction away from my lips. His hungry gaze focuses down to the small space between us. "I love you more." And kisses the corner of my lips before pulling away to get ready for work.

The word is at the tip of my tongue. Stay. Just Stay.

"I'll be back just before six, okay? We'll have dinner and talk all about how you won me over, yeah?"

I hum in agreement as I stare blankly at the ceiling. I can feel it in my gut, I should've asked him to stay.

╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗

Focus. FOCUS. Focus- No, there is no more focusing. It's too quiet. The eerie silence seems to echo across the apartment threatening the busy street below. I've tried and failed to feign interest in one of these poetry books, having the slightest hope that time would run along much faster than the slowly mocking ticks of the clock by Gus' fish tank. I think I might smash that clock to pieces.

Biting my nails despite my inside protests, "They should've been home by now". I throw the book back onto the stacks as I make over to lean through the window, in yet another desperate attempt to see Marc or Steven. Nada.

If I could summon Khonsu I.....maybe I am over-reacting? They've been gone just seven hours. Roughly two more than intended. Call. Marc just needs to call me or text me or summon the moon or whatever to tell me that everything is fine. He's fine. Steven's fine.

Is it idiotic to want the love of your life to text you they might be late coming home because the bird-God they serve might have taken it a bit to far this time?

I groan. That is what my world has come to then. This is taking way too long. I slam the windows shut and stomp over to my phone. No new messages, "Could-it wouldn't be that hard for you to let me know what's going on..."

Wind rips across the apartment throwing a huge stack of books on the floor, "LITTLE BUG. MARC NEEDS YOUR HELP."

Khonsu towers over me slamming his staff into the floor. I knew it. I knew it. Forcing myself to stand my ground I ask, "Where is he?"

He doesn't reply. What do I need to say please? "Khonsu!"

"Marc needs your help, Little Bug.”

Those are words I never thought I'd hear from a God. Either things were bad in the beginning or they've gotten much worse. Why be on this stupid mission at all, "Can't you reach Marc or Steven and get him out of there? Abort the mission and all that, yeah?"

"I cannot reach Marc."

My heart threatens to stop working. I turn to Khonsu tilting my head to the side, "Steven?"

Khonsu says nothing.

My throat tightens as tears threaten make their escape. No. No. No. "What do you mean you can't reach them?"

"The men Marc followed were waiting for him."

I knew it. I fucking KNEW. I should've told him to stay in bed....yanked him in and called into work. I should-

"He's not dead, yet."

I am going to kill this god, "This is becoming too painfully ominous to drawl out." I turn towards the apartment door to find that damn bird standing in front of it.

"I can't allow you to go."

I scoff, "You asked me to help Marc. You can't do anything to me besides knock shit over. I am going to-"

"Part of the deal I have with Marc is to keep you from harm."

"Marc could be dying, Khonsu! To hell with the deal!" Neither of us make a move.

"What if we temporarily amend the deal?”

I say nothing. Marc warned me about this. About Khonsu trying to ensnare me into this 24/7 nightmare of his. Marc would do anything-Steven does do everything to keep this from happening. Creating a new deal? One where-no. The answer is no....but if Steven and Marc are dying would I be able to live with myself for not even trying to save them?

They have already sacrificed so much to protect this. This pocket of reality where I get to wake up in their arms in the morning; where I get to hold hands with Steven and walk around the museum; where Marc and I adventure into the curiously unknown. If they are willing to do so much to protect it, then so am I.

Khonsu just stands there, waiting. A part of my gut nags at me to stop, to stop this from going any further. I haven't listened to my gut all day, might as well keep the track record going, "Like. What."

"I call upon you as my Avatar when Marc finds himself unable to summon the suit."

No. No. Too many variables, "You can do that? Have two avatars?"

"When you are my Avatar Marc will no longer have access to the suit-"

"No. Can't-Can't I borrow the armor for a night?"

"I'm afraid they don't have much time left. You need to agree to help me now." I follow Khonsu's gaze to the window. They are out there, hurt. And I am just going to let them die?

"I-" Marc nor Steven would hesitate in this position. They would do whatever it is to save me. But they would not want this. I square my shoulders and look back at Khonsu, "I agree to be your avatar for one night-this night only. After tonight, once Marc and Steven are safe, I will no longer be your avatar. That is the deal I propose."

Khonsu doesn't answer me. He spins the staff in his hand as if he contemplating the terms of our small agreement, "Agreed. Do you, (Y/N) (L/N), swear to protect the travelers of the night and bring my vengeance to those who would do them harm?"

This time I don't hesitate, "Yes. I swear." Blinding light melts over my body as a version of the ceremonial suit molds against me. The suit.....it feels good, great in fact. Unlike Marc and Steven's version of the armor, mine holds a small cape from to crescent moon pins on my shoulders, the chest piece doesn't hold any weapons like Marcs but binds to my pants with a black belt. It reminds me of Steven's suit. Thank the God it's not a skirt. The sleeves break apart from my shoulders only to begin just above my elbow all the way down my arm to cover my hands. In the reflection of the fish tank I can see the mask covers my entire face, glad one thing doesn't change between suits. Where the hell is the weapon?

Khonsu moves away from the door, "Come. We do not have much time."

He turns into wind and flies out of the window, and I follow.

╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗

The large drop from the edge of this building makes my stomach queazy. I bite my cheek in attempt to ignore the fact that even though I can heal- falling off the roof will hurt more than I'd wish. The building across the large fall is the Students Art and Design Showcase Quarter. Large enough for the many students to display their work in anticipation for hopeful career and small enough to house Khonsu's avatar, I suppose.

"Marc is in there." With that Khonsu disappears.

I regret not indulging Steven when he asked me to visit this place. If I did I'd have a better idea of the layout. I make a silent promise to myself to visit anywhere and everywhere Steven and Marc want to go. Even if it's across the damn world.

They probably have guards stationed at the entrance and exits to keep out any unwanted visitors, but they wouldn't be looking at the windows. Sending a small prayer that I don't fall to my death I jump/stumble to the adjacent structure that slightly overlooks the glass ceiling.

My body freezes. One Jackal circles a bruised up and bloody man-MARC. Oh-oh no. He's barely moving-barely breathing. These people did this to him? For what? To say hello to Khonsu? To receive the powers of being his avatar? I wonder why Khonsu doesn't leap to the opportunity, he has devoted followers just like-just like Ammit. Huh. Stone grinds against stone as I realize that I gripped the ledge too hard. A piece snaps off. Well, this might be a good distraction.

Over looking the court yard beyond the entrance door, I throw the rock into the window of a small boutique shop. The crash in louder than anticipated as the siren echos along the ally's startling the few drunk people making to stumble down the street.

The jackal bolts in the direction of the sirens followed by a few others with swords. After a minute or two, I jump and crash through the glass ceiling not too far from Marc. I can only hope that the monsters and men are too far to make it back.

"Marc?" I kneel down to the near-to corpse of the love of my life, "Marc, I need you to open your eyes, baby." His faint breathing is the only thing that replies. "Steven? Wake up for me, okay? Just-Just please look at me."

"Get him out of here." Khonsu demands.

I wrap my arm around his legs and nestle his head on my arm as I haul him up. So, so different from this morning. I really should have said yes to that date a few days ago. Honestly, 'I should have' seems to be the poisonous thorn in my life right now. Making my way opposite of the guards, I venture down the dark hall only to hear the howl of the jackal.

"It seems...Khonsu already found a new avatar." A man drawls as he makes his way into the moonlight. The tall man is wearing a sharp dark blue suit with huge gold cuff links, smiling as if he's already won. Asshole. Two others flanking him with swords.

"Temporary avatar." I growl, setting Marc down against a large canvas of a blended morning to night sky. The sun melting into the moon as stars fight to be brighter than the day before it. It's beautiful. And if I wasn't here like this I would have stared at it all day. "I just came to admire the art. I hope you don't mind if I take a piece home, yeah?"

The jackal crawls its way up to the mystery man watching me like I'm a late night snack. They truly are as terrifying as Steven described.

"You'd need to pay for it."

The men inch closer trying to surround me. In instinct, I reach behind me grasping the hilt of some sort of weapon, "I am not going to pay for what's already been stolen from me." I pull the weapon from my back to reveal a solid metal staff. I'll have to think about the physics later.

The mystery man laughs and the jackal lunges.

---------

Pain ripples across my stomach from being sliced open by the last mans' sword. I can feel the armor trying to heal the wound but my strength gives away inch by inch as the jackal pins me to the floor. The staff parts the jackals jaws keeping it from snapping my neck. How does Marc and Steven do this?

Gathering what seems to be the last of my strength, I kick my foot into the chest of the jackal sending it up into the ceiling. I panic and break open my staff to reveal to sharp sword like points. The jackal falls impaling itself. Luck.

I throw the disintegrating hound off my body, discarding the staff, and move over to where Marc leans up against the painting.

I caress his cheek, "Baby, will you please open your eyes?" His breathing seems less labored than before which I hope is a good sign. "Steven, can you hear me? Don't-Don't leave me."

The mystery man begins to stir, "This? This is what Khonsu summoned me for?"

"...what?" I turn slowly to the man climbing onto his feet, "What-what did you just say?"

He laughs as blood slides down his chin, "Khonsu wanted me here." I didn't see it until I felt it. The CRACK as the end of the staff hits my temple. I fall to the floor groaning, trying to stand up only to be kicked over on my side, "You think he cares SO much about his avatars?"

He brings the staff down on my ribs and all the air flies from my body. He does it again,

and again,

and again.

"Khonsu always plans far ahead." He kicks me and I fly into the opposite wall, the damage happening faster than I can heal.

I should've known that this would happen. I should have told Steven to just stay with me for the day. I should have been present with him more. Focus more on those mornings that I had with him, or when Marc and I would argue, or when we would cook together. I should-

NO.

No more. No more should. No more. I will.

I will.

I reach my hand up and stop the staff.

╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗

The glare I receive from the couple in the elevator sets my skin on fire but I manage a small nod, "Drank too much...at a fashion event." The elevator shutters on the 3rd floor nearly knocking Marc from my grip. It would have been a great time to have Steven's suit, easier to convince I bet. He moans a bit as the suit he successfully summoned (after about a mile from the Art Quarter) slowly heals him.

The couple hurries off as I slide across the back of the elevator and kick our floor with my foot sending shooting pains throughout my torso. I bite my lip and ignore it.

We hobble down the hallway to our apartment. I remove his arm from my shoulders as I lean him up against the wall and open the door slightly using the handle to lean into the door. I regretfully take a deep breath leaning off the door to grab Marc-now Steven and haul him inside.

"Of course you'd pick now to change your suit, Mr. Knight."

Kicking the door closed I make our way to the bed, carefully setting him on top of it. The armor remains but I kiss his temple regardless.

╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗

Marc and Steven watch through the mirrors reflection as (y/n) slides down the side of the bed wincing, "It shouldn't have gone this poorly."

"Oy, you got that right, mate. What the hell happened back there?"

With the little movement granted in this mirror-exchange Marc wanted to pace about but only could shake his head. His brows narrowed to his body, his gaze hard-set in wondering how it all went wrong so quickly. You'd tell him he's got his 'interrogation-stare' then kiss in between his brows, but you couldn't see him no matter how badly he wanted that kiss, "I-I don't know. I just-"

"Just what? Decided to take a nap in the middle of fight?"

"Okay, big guy. Why don't you tell me what happened, huh? How did we go from kicking ass to getting our ass kicked?"

Their heads snap in your direction as you haul yourself up and begin to walk to the door.

"Where in the hell is she goin'?" Marc asks. You stop just in front of the fish tank and grab the fishbfood. Huffing a laugh you slowly open the food and sprinkle it atop the bubbling water, "Steven would be upset if I forgot to feed you guys."

"Not if you are hurt I wouldn't." Steven mumbles but finds your act endearing.

You lean on the glass tank and watch whatever food doesn't get devoured float to the bottom. You push off the tank and make your way back to the bed, "I don't even know what to say." One arm wrapped around your chest and the other out against the desk for stability as you continue to the bed, "but I am not surprised."

"Marc...Marc, what is she talking about?"

"I-I don't know." Marc replies, "How, how did she get us out of there?"

"What?"

Marc jumps slamming his hands on the glass, "The Art Quarter, Steven! How did she get us out?"

You sit just beside them straightening the creases of their suit, "Why is it taking so long to heal?"

Wind rushes across the room, "I told you I can not have two Avatars.”

"She-She made a deal with...with Khonsu?" Steven asks in disbelief. Marc covers his face, "GOD DAMN IT!"

"Yeah, well, my time to shine is up." A smile smile graces your features, "So, you don't have two Avatars. You only have..." Your voice tightens on the word, "..him."

"There is still time between now and sunrise."

You laugh despite the pain raging against your rib cage, "Good. Yeah, that's-thats great even. Because now I can ask why you summoned those mercs here."

Khonsu said nothing as you stared up at him. Marc and Steven silent themselves. Their hand moved a bit as you grabbed it to hold to your chest, "Never thought a God would be struck silent."

"Easy, baby." Marc warns, like you could hear him.

"Those men defied what I stand for, protection against those who do harm. I sent my Moon Knight after those who've done unspeakable evil-"

"And if Marc and Steven died?"

"They know the risks."

Spoken like a true manipulator. "I'm sure."

"Speak up, Little Bug."

"I said, I'm sure you stupid bird!" Anger bursting through every pore of your body. Khonsu slams his staff on the ground making the wood beneath groan, the lights flash in blinding patterns, and the wind knocking things off the shelves, the desk, flying everywhere all at once.

Marc and Steven watch with terror as Khonsu storms to you but...you don't back down. You just stare right back at Khonsu. Pride begins to bloom right next to their terror.

"If you are so certain of this, that I manipulated them to believe they didn't have a choice, then take their place."

"No." Marc and Steven say at the same time but a groan escapes their mouth.

"What?" You manage.

"I am giving you the choice. Take their place and they'll be free of the deal. You care for them, don't you?"

"I-" Marc and Steven swear they can feel your heart bang against your chest, wanting out, out, out.

"Make a new deal with me and I'll release them."

You stare down at them, tears forming in your eyes.

"Baby, if you-please do not agree to what the bastard offers." Marc pleads. Steven nods his agreement, "Yeah, Yeah! Don't believe a bloody word that comes out of his mouth!"

"Do you, (Y/N) (L/N), swear to protect the travelers of the night and bring my vengeance to those-?"

"No." You state, "I do not."

Khonsu huffs a small laugh, "Very well", and disappears.

It's silent for a few minutes before you begin to speak again, "Y'know this is the most quiet you've been? Can't even get you to stop talking as Marc when he's just 'bruting' about. Not that I am complaining, I never want you to stop talking, to stop hearing your voice."

Steven lifts a small smile with tears running down his face, Marc just watches with sad, yet hopeful eyes.

You sniffle a small sob but you grip both ends of his jacket, "You listen to me Steven Grant and Marc Spector. I love you. And no matter what life brings us I will always love both of you. I will not leave you because some bird with an ego tries to manipulate us, I will not leave you because you are Moon Knight, I will not leave you because you can anger the shit out of me. I ask, just ask you, just-"

You grab his hand and lean into it, "Just stay. Stay with me."

Their body doesn't move no matter how much Steven and Marc try to take control of it. But the sun rise peaks out over the buildings and you feel a weight pull from your body.

╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗

Their suit slowly melts away and reveals their clothes from the day before. Steven was definitely in control of this body before they suited up. I check their face, their arms, and their chest. No previous bruising from what I saw last night which means that everything is somewhat back to normal.

I reach over to grab the blanket on my side of the bed, the pain from the staff blows' has receded a little bit but I've no doubt that I'll have some bruising there for sometime. Pulling the blanket, two hands grip my wrists and I freeze.

I prepare for the tongue lashing of a lifetime but I'm only met with wide eyes. No words come from his mouth so I'll be the first to stammer, "Listen, before you get all mad and refuse to talk to me I just want to say that I was worried and I felt like I had no other choice."

He doesn't say anything. I don't even know who's staring at me right now.

"And when I was able to make a less than twelve hour deal with the God of the Moon or whatever I didn't regret it but I didn't jump into the roll either. I remember what you said-and I-I made a pretty fair deal."

Still nothing.

"And I kicked ass, kicked more ass than you, apparently."

He raises an eyebrow at that.

"Not-not that I meant it was any trouble. NOT THAT I MEAN YOU couldn't have done that same as I did if you tried."

Both eyebrows raise.

"That's-that's not what I meant. I only mean, I mean that I kicked ass in the, in the name of your-your ass? I don't even know what-I'm just-Could you say something, anything?" I would yield no more to this fluttering.

"You called Khonsu a 'stupid bird'." Marc mumbles. Yanking me into his chest and rolling over till he's towering over me, "and you made a deal with him."

I barely registered the pain, "You heard that?"

A muscle tenses in Marcs jaw as he looks over my body, "I heard it. All of it."

Be honest, "I thought about it, y'know." Marc stills over me, raising his interrogation stare into my very soul. I wince, "I mean, wouldn't you? If he offered to free me, would you have taken the deal?"

He huffs a breath as it blows my hair out of my face, "Yeah, Yeah, I would have. But that doesn't-"

"No, no it doesn't. I know." I take in a shaky breath, "I need you in my life Marc, you and Steven. I will do whatever it takes to keep you in my life. And if that-"

Marc lips crashes into mine, devouring, claiming. His hand slides up my arm and pins my wrist above my head. Brushing his tongue across my lower lip, I part my mouth to deepen the kiss and Marc doesn't hesitate. My whole body floods with heat and desire as Marc moves his leg in between my own. Lighting shoots across every point of contact he makes, frying every nerve in my body with need for more, more, more. My free hand runs through this dark curls pulling him closer, a small groan rumbles against me and I can't help but smile a bit.

He pulls away leaning against my forehead as we catch our breath, "We'd never leave."

He doesn't say anything for a minute as we lay together, my heart beat relentless as always as I wait for him to speak.

"A bit crazy, innit? Having a big old bird to argue with."

"Steven?"

He doesn't move away and grips me tighter, "Promise to never do that again, please? Just promise us that you-you won't ever, ever do that again."

"I-I promise."

Steven leans down and presses a few kisses to my cheek, "Good, yeah. That's great." He leans in to what I think is a full kiss but he feigns to the right to kiss a corner of my lips, then the other corner. Steven moves to my cheek and kisses me there, "Doesn't feel that great to be teased, now, does it?"

I hum, "If I'm being teased by you, I can't complain."

Stevens dorky smile widens as he tries to suppress a laugh. But before I can kiss him he says, "I-I should be honest, though. We-Marc and I-are still mad at you. You did something totally reckless and-and you put yourself in a danger."

I nod with what room I have, "I know."

"No, No, you don't know, do you?" Steven presses. I clamp my jaw shut, surprised by Steven's anger, "You could've died. Be kil-taken an' all that, yeah?"

"I-"

"Then-then what we'd do from that?"

"I-"

"You can't just-" I cut off his scolding as I press my mouth to his. His sweet lips part slightly and I kiss him again. His hand moves from my arm to my cheek and I lean into his touch. He breaks away and looks into my eyes, "I am-I am still fuming."

I nod, "Okay."

He leans down to kiss me once more BEEP BEEP BEEP

-but the loud alarm clock startles us. He reaches a hand up the the stand and tugs it from the wall throwing it across the room just below the fish tank and winces, "Sorry, guys."

I move his gaze back over to me, "Stay with me?"

"Always."

Disclaimer:

I own none of these characters that associate with Marvel. Marvel has all rights given to these characters.

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bwbatta · 4 years ago

Text

The five times James Potter asked you to marry him

(and the one time he meant it)

Pairing: James Potter x Slytherin!Reader

Warnings: 18+, Sexual content, swearing

Word Count: 3.6K

A/N: I saw this done with Fred somewhere but can’t remember who it was that wrote it, so thought I’d do the same with our boy James. There is also a lil bit of smutty goodness within this so please don’t read if this offends you or if you are underage!

One

The first time James Potter asked you to marry him was when he first met you.

Quidditch season had begun and Gryffindor vs Slytherin was the first game, enticing everyone to the stands to watch the two rival teams battle it out. James was aware of the new team members he was playing against, but blissfully unaware of how one of them was you.

Their Gryffindor keeper had just saved a goal from your teammate, throwing the quaffle to James, only for it to be stolen from his grasp before he could blink.

“What the-”

His eyes caught sight of your green quidditch robes as you zipped away, throwing the quaffle for another goal and succeeding as it soared through. The Slytherin stands erupted into cheers, but James could barely focus on it as he was too focused on you.

Shaking it off, James pushed himself to focus on the game again, more determined to score, yet when you somehow stole the quaffle away from him another time, he couldn’t help but laugh.

Had Slytherin finally recruited a decent quidditch player?!

The sarcastic thought barely slipped through his mind before the quaffle vanished from his hands a third time.

“Prongs!” Sirius flew up beside him, pointing his beater’s bat towards him in an accusing way, “stop giving her the bloody quaffle!”

James just rolled his eyes before flying off towards you with the intent to nick it back.

Whilst you easily avoided a bludger that Sirius had hit towards you, James quickly pinched back the quaffle in the split second you were distracted. With a cheeky grin in your direction, he winked and flew towards the Slytherin goals.

After that, it became more of a game between the two of you rather than the actual match. Stealing the quaffle back and forth had you both snickering at the other when they lost it.

With the commentator suddenly breaking the information that the two seekers were in a battle to catch the snitch, James’ attention shifted for just a moment to watch, which was just long enough for you to steal the quaffle away once more, just as the game ended.

Noticing the quaffle no longer in his grip, his attention shot to you where you held up the ball with a grin, winking back at him.

Despite the two of you messing around with each other the whole game, neither of you had said a word to the other. Breaking the silence between the two of you, James couldn’t help but laugh, despite the fact Gryffindor had just lost after Regulus Black had caught the snitch for Slytherin.

“Marry me.” He grinned widely at you as you smiled back just as big.

“Not today.” You snickered, winking at him once more before flying down to join your team.

Sirius appeared beside his best mate with an odd expression on his face, having just witnessed the exchange.

“Am I missing something?”

James just chuckled, but his gaze stayed on you, watching as you cheered along with you team at the win. He wasn’t aware of who you were before the game, but he was very aware of you now.

Two

Despite the fact you were sorted in Slytherin, you didn’t get along with certain members of your house. The common room always seemed to be the hotspot for wannabe dark wizards who publicly shared their common views on blood status and who wasn’t worthy of studying magic.

It was something you didn’t agree with and so avoided as much as you could. This was why you sought your refuge in one of the alcoves off the third floor corridor. It was quiet and you didn’t get nearly as distracted as you would if you had stayed in the common room, or even the library for that matter.

Hearing a loud swear and then the sound of feet pounding down the corridor, you couldn’t help but be curious. Sticking your head out, you had to admit you weren’t surprised to see a panicked James Potter and Sirius Black running down the corridor towards you.

The loud shout from behind them, which could only have come from Professor McGonagall, followed them as it echoed down the hall.

The corridor came to a dead end and the two friends shared a look of dread. Before you knew what came over you, you stuck your head out and whispered to them.

“Psst,” their attention was immediately on you, “in here.”

Stepping out of your spot, the two boys clambered in as you walked down the corridor to come face to face with a furious Professor McGonagall.

“Miss Y/L/N,” she controlled her anger as she questioned you, “have you seen Mr Potter or Mr Black come down here?”

“The two Gryffindors?” You inquired, your face void of anything that would give you away, “not down here, no, though judging from the noise and smell of chaos, I think they went that way.”

Pointing down the direction of the opposite hall, the professor thanked you before turning and storming down it, turning the corner at the end and disappearing from sight.

With a snicker, you turned and headed back to find both James and Sirius with huge grins on their faces.

“Oh, you’re not just a normal Slytherin are you?!” James gleamed, stepping forward, out of the hiding spot.

“A normal Slytherin?!”

“Conniving, back stabbing, selfish.” Sirius listed off, “my entire family’s full of them, but you are different.”

“Glad I could break the Stereotype.” You shrugged a shoulder, before your attention shifted to James. “What did you two do anyway which set off McGonagall like that?!”

The pair of Gryffindor’s looked slightly sheepish suddenly as if they were reluctant to say.

“Uhhh, maybe because we set up a prank for some Slytherins’ to drop honey and feathers on them as they walked through the Great Hall, but McGonagall ended up walking through it instead.” James grimaced at the memory of how furious the teacher was.

“Well that was stupid,” you snorted whilst grabbing your bag from the floor, “she obviously just vanished it. Next time you should definitely add a sticking charm so they can’t just magic it away. Oh and get the right target. As far as I’m concerned, the Slytherin’s that are the biggest dickheads are fair game, deal?”

“Marry me.” James gazed at you like you just discovered the stars.

With a small laugh and a roll of your eyes, your attention was quickly drawn to a piece of folded parchment on the ground which you were sure wasn’t yours.

“What’s this?” You questioned as you caught sight of the front. “Messers Moony, Wormta- hey!”

“Nothing!” Sirius said quickly, snatching it from your grip and tucking it away.

“Yeah because if it was nothing, you wouldn’t just rip it out of my hands now?!” You snickered, “you know if you really don’t want it to be read, you should put a password phrase on it to at least make it look like it’s nothing.”

“Actually, that’s not a bad idea.” Sirius grinned, “you know, you’re not that bad.”

“So I’ve been told.” You laughed back at him, completely missing how James was grinning at you with utter wonder in his eyes.

Three

After inspiring the Gryffindor duo with both the prank idea and how to further the map, you didn’t expect that James and Sirius would rarely leave you alone.

Because of this, you were introduced to Remus and Peter since both James and Sirius had determined you should be friends, especially when you could give them inside knowledge on which Slytherins to go after.

You weren’t sure how to feel about it at first, but after a while it became natural to sit with the boys for breakfast or dinner.

You also didn’t expect to see Amycus Carrow walk through the common room late one evening, mysteriously covered in honey and feathers after relaying a snide comment to you about your newfound friends.

The satisfaction you got from seeing Carrow try to explain there was obviously a sticking charm, preventing him from vanishing the sticky mess to his friends, was so much better than you could’ve imagined. You told the boys that very thing the next day.

It also wasn’t long before James took the plunge and asked you out to Hogsmeade.

The two of you had grown close despite your different houses, yet you both couldn’t deny there was a major attraction between you. (Something Sirius constantly commented on.)

Which was why you found yourself in the Three Broomsticks with James, laughing over butterbeers with story he told you.

“So then Remus enters the room to find it destroyed with Sirius handcuffed to his bed, naked, with only a pillow covering him. And you know what he said, like any other Tuesday? ‘I heard they’re serving Pie for dinner tonight’.”

“I’m telling you, those Ravenclaw girls are devious! Maybe even more so than us Slytherins!”

“Well if it’s any consolation, I would hate to get on your bad side.” James grinned at you, raising his glass.

“I’ll drink to that.” You snickered, clinking your glass with his.

“Well well, I wouldn’t have expected to see you in here with this riffraff, Y/N.” A cold voice was heard from behind you. “Then again, you did always hang around with the wrong sort, a blood traitor no less.”

Turning around, your eyes met the steely blue ones of Lucius Malfoy.

“Don’t call me by my first name like we’re friends, Malfoy. And for the record, at least I don’t associate myself with wannabe death eaters, like your friends.”

To further your point, your eyes flickered over to the group where Malfoy was originally sat, the group containing the Carrows, Mulciber and Snape.

Lucius’ expression was tight, yet both James and you could see the look of hate in his eyes.

“You should leave.” James stood to match Lucius’ height as he rounded the table, effectively putting himself between the two of you. The two men stared each other down.

“And why should I?” Lucius questioned back, his voice cold.

“Because it would be an absolute shame if anyone found out about your midnight visitor the other night. Right, Malfoy?” You questioned with a innocent look on your face.

Standing up and linking your arm with James’, Lucius’ eyes snapped to you as you held his expression with a stern one of your own.

“A Hufflepuff, wasn’t she? And a muggleborn no less. Which is weird because, aren’t you engaged to Narcissa Black? I wonder what her family would think, them being the ‘Noble House of Black’ and all?”

Lucius looked furious, but you held his glare firmly, only for him to step back a few moments later, allowing a space for you to pass. Pulling James along with you, you headed towards the door with a spring in your step like you hadn’t just blackmailed one of the Slytherin prefects.

“Ooh, can we go to Honeydukes? I need to stock up on chocolate frogs.”

James was stunned, captivated and slightly aroused.

Watching you take on Malfoy like it was nothing more than a brain training activity, made him laugh in wonder as the two of you exited onto the street.

You kept talking about the new limited edition sugar quills before you paused, realising James wasn’t really listening to you anymore.

“Hey, you alright?”

“Marry me.”

With a grin, you just linked arms with him again, the two of you heading in the direction of the sweet shop, a growing list of sugary items to buy.

Four

With a groan of pleasure, James pulled you tighter to him as you moaned out his name, your hands wound in his hair making it appear a lot messier than usual.

The two of you had graduated Hogwarts only a few months ago, and after dating for just over two years, James asked you to move in with him once you finished school.

The small flat the two of you shared was found in Diagon Alley, above the quidditch shop, which you wondered whether he had planned or not when he first suggested you view the place. Sirius and Remus had their own flat which the former had bought for the two with the money he had inherited from uncle, after being disowned from his family.

Your small group of friends supported him the best you could, which included Sirius moving in with James and his parents for a while as they finished Hogwarts. Yet, when they entered the final months of their seventh year at school, Sirius insisted he would look for his own place, not wanting to intrude longer than he already had, not that the Potters’ would call him staying with them an intrusion of any kind.

“Fuck, Y/N.” James gasped out as he quickened his pace, thrusting into you faster as you christened the different rooms.

You had both started in your bedroom before moving to the living room, kitchen and then the bathroom, before ending up back in your room once more.

His lips met your own as you pulled him by his neck closer to you, wrapping you legs around his waist tighter, effectively getting James to hit a spot deep within you, causing you to cry out in pleasure.

Quickening his pace, James used his expert fingers to bring you closer to your brink, before you gasped out loudly, quickly reaching your climax. The feeling of you coming around him had James grunting out, thrusting harder to chase his own release.

Gripping your headboard, he came with a groan, muttering your name over and over as he pulled you close to him, both of you basking in the bliss that came from the several orgasms you’d both experienced over the last few hours.

“Marry me.” James murmured into you hair, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“Maybe later.” You chuckled, exhaustion now hitting you hard as you both relaxed back in bed. “Too tired now.”

James snickered as he pulled a blanket over the two of you, finding a comfortable position as you curled up together, both utterly content within that perfect moment.

Five

A lot had changed since you left Hogwarts and being inducted into the Order of the Phoenix was just one of them.

Your closest friends were also recruited which both reassured you and terrified you. As much as you were glad that you were fighting on the right side of the war with the people you could trust with your life, if anything happened to any of them, you don’t know what you’d do.

It was suppose to be a small mission, just quick enough to gain intel for the Order which was why Moody chose only a select few of you to complete it.

James, Remus and you, accompanied by Lily Evans, who you had been properly introduced to in your seventh year, were the four chosen for the task. This of course had annoyed Sirius to no end as he hadn’t been picked and constantly moaned about it the few days prior.

Accidentally setting off the taboo alarm, death eaters apparated before you causing the four of you to split into two’s, fighting back to back.

Quickly hitting the three death eaters before you with a stunning spell, you turned and shot another ‘stupefy’ at one who had their wand aimed at Lily. She successfully took out a couple more as she was back to back with you, sharing a grin at how well both of your training had helped you.

Glancing over at James unconsciously, you spotted one sneak up behind him as he was separated from Remus after one death eater blew up the floor beneath them.

With the first spell that flew to mind, you aimed your wand at the advancing threat, shooting a bat bogey hex at them, just as their killing curse missed James by inches, only for him to be hit by a weak confundus charm.

You were certain your heart skipped several beats due to the stress and anxiety as you dropped to your knees next to him on the ground. His nose was obviously broken from one spell shot at him and a dazed expression was present on his face.

Taking his face in between your hands, you quickly got a good look at him to check for more injuries as Lily and Remus stunned the last of the attackers and started to round them up.

“James, can you hear me?”

“Y/N,” he grinned widely, “what are you doing here?”

“Saving your arse from being killed.” You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the small smile on your face at how dopey your boyfriend looked.

“You always save my arse, I think you quite like my arse really.” James snickered loudly like he had just told a funny joke. “I think you might want to marry my arse. Ooh, I think you should really marry me though.”

You chuckled at him, quickly fixing his broken nose and helping him up.

“It means you’ll have to actually propose to me then, with a proposal better than that, my love.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

James nodded, deep in thought before his eyes lifted to spot Remus and immediately he waved an arm to try get his attention.

“MOONY! I NEED YOUR HELP TO PROPOSE.”

Six

The truth was, as much as James joked about it, and as much as he said it within the span of meeting you, you did not expect it for one moment when he actually asked you to marry him.

Saturday started off as any normal weekend would.

With the promise from Dumbledore to call only if it was an emergency, your group of friends was given the day off and so a plan was set in motion to have dinner at yours and James’ flat. Despite popular belief, James could actually cook very well and so insisted on whipping up a roast dinner for you all, shooing you out of the kitchen when you tried to help.

Sitting around your dining table with your closest friends, you couldn’t have asked for a better day. It was the first in a while where everyone could relax slightly and take the time to enjoy themselves.

Remus and you were in a discussion about a book he had recommended to you, when James entered the room with the meal, putting it in the centre of the table. Whilst Sirius was avidly denying James could cook, Lily and you snickered between you as you watched the boys interact with each other.

The meal went by quickly, everyone enjoying their time together before Lily and you cleared the plates away as a compromise, after James cooked everything.

You didn’t suspect anything going on until you reentered the room to find the boys in a hushed discussion, giant smiles on their faces, jumping away from each other after noticing you return.

“Everything okay?” You asked slightly suspicious as the four boys shrugged off your concerns.

“Yeah, absolutely perfect, wanna sit down?” Sirius wrapped an arm around your shoulders, guiding you to the living room with the others following.

“You’re acting weird, Siri.”

“I am weird, honey, I was born into the House of Black.”

With a smile and narrowed eyes, you decided to ignore whatever secret it was the boys had, and focused on enjoying the time you had together.

It wasn’t until James stood and grabbed your hands, pulling you up from your seat, that you became slightly suspicious again.

“Y/N, if you don’t mind, I’d like to say something to you and all our friends.”

Wrapping an arm around your waist, he brought you closer to him, pressing a kiss to your head. Wrapping your own arm around his waist in turn, you cuddled close to him, feeling absolutely content.

“As we all know,” James began, catching the attention of the small group, “it had been an absolute shock for most of you hear today, that I can actually cook a meal and not poison anyone.”

A round of snickers passed around the group as James rolled his eyes at your reactions.

“We also all know that me being able to cook, is far from the most shocking thing to happen to us all. The biggest shock, was of course, the Gryffindor quidditch team losing to Slytherin when this little minx showed up and stole the show!”

“Here here!” Sirius agreed, lifting his glass of Firewhiskey in agreement.

“Another shock was also when I asked her on a date and she agreed, yet I think that was more Y/N’s mistake than anything.” James chuckled out, now looking slightly more nervous than he did before. “If we’re talking about biggest shocks throughout our relationship, her agreeing to move in with me was another, along with my shock when I discovered what she could do with her tongue-”

“James!”

“Ow! Okay, fine, no bedroom talk!”

The punch to his arm barely phased James’ smile though as he grinned at you so wholeheartedly, you think you might melt on the spot.

“Anyway, one thing that probably isn’t a shock is the countless times I’ve mentioned my intentions to you. Which is why...”

James unravelled his arm from your waist as he quickly caught something thrown at him by Remus, before dropping to one knee in front of you.

You were sure your heart had stopped.

“I’m now going to ask you again, legitimately this time.”

Opening up the small white box, a gorgeous diamond and ruby ring was readily positioned, shining up at you as your eyes flicked from the ring, to James and back repeatedly.

“Y/N, I know I’ve said this before, but please, marry me?!”

Throwing your arms around his neck, you must’ve repeated the word ‘yes’ over and over again as James proceeded to kiss you, before slipping the ring on your finger.

In that moment, surrounded by your closest friends and the man you loved more than anything, you felt the happiest you ever had and wished for nothing more than to live in that moment forever.

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