#cause why am i awake its 7am

[itsyourstarboy]

Freebound

(Redacted Audio fanfic—1247 words)

Summary: Its the moonbound solstice, and Freelancer is freebound. Watch them cause chaos, on accident and on purpose.

Read here on Ao3

—

I.

The sunlight streamed through the curtains above the bed, cascading a golden glow across the room. Gavin, still dazed with sleep, stretched out an arm to pull his deviant close. His outstretched hand met cold sheets, and his brow furrowed as he felt around, cracking an eye open in confusion.

“Deviant?” He softly called.

When he was met with silence, he got up. It wasn’t like them to leave him in bed all alone. Quickly finding his pants that were discarded the night before, he exited their bedroom. Where were they?

As he neared the kitchen, he picked up on their aura. It was bouncing off the walls, feeling strong one minute, and practically nonexistent the next.

“Deviant?” He softly called, again.

They turned to him, a small smile on their face, “g’mornin’.”

The kitchen was… well, it wasn’t a mess, per say. It was… different.

“What are you doing in here, love?” Gavin asked.

“I’m rearranging the cabinets.”

“At 7am?”

Freelancer stared at him for a moment, “yeah.”

Gavin suppressed a chuckle, “may I ask why?”

“Well, I woke up this morning and I felt like I had bees in my bones, so I went to the grocery store down the street to buy six pounds of butter. Then when I got home, I accidentally set the couch on fire. Went shopping for one online, but I think I ordered 20.”

Gavin was speechless. “H-how long have you been awake?”

“1:14 am,” they laughed out in a sigh. They looked so tired.

“When you told me the solstices were often… interesting for you, this is not what I expected.”

“There is never a way to predict what may happen, I am a slave to my core for the remainder of this solstice. I think I just caused the large oak tree outside to become an even larger oak tree.”

At that, the ground shook, and Gavin’s eyes went wide.

“How about we go back to bed for a bit?”

II.

Lasko was doing paperwork on his coffee table. Nothing too strenuous—he was sunbound after all—just some stuff to keep him occupied while he felt like a dry apple slice.

Freelancer walked in the door, “hey, Lasko-babe.”

“Wh- oh. Hi, Freelancer. What are you doing here? And why didn’t you knock? N-not that I’m upset you're here, I mean, I-I’m always happy to see you, it’s just that you’re not exactly the type to just invite yourself into someone’s apartment… At least- at least I think you're n-not… are you?”

They sighed with a tired smile, “yeah I know, m’sorry. I would’ve knocked, but it’s too… too much. Too noise. M- no- that’s not… words.”

Lasko stood as his friend swayed on their feet, “are- are you f-feeling? Alright? Pft- no, what am I saying? Of course you’re not, it’s the solstice. Com- come sit down, how did you even get here, anyway?”

“Mmm,” Freelancer hummed as Lasko forced them to sit on the couch. They immediately sunk into the cushions, “I was feeling up, an’ I wanted to come hang out with you, but halfway here I felt not-up.”

“Not-up?”

“Yeah.”

“I mean- I guess that makes sense? Y-you are a freelancer, so you’re going to feel all kinds of… ‘ups’ and downs. M- Magically, anyway.”

“M’yeah, my magic has been ups and downs,” they mumbled, leaning into Lasko as he sat next to them. “I used psychokinesis to launch my phone into orbit.”

III.

Huxley was laying on his side, his head propped up on his arm, and his fingers threading through Damien’s hair. He was happy taking care of him like this. Right here, in this moment, with his boyfriend curled up next to him.

There was a knock at the front door.

“Are you gonna get that?” Damien mumbled when Huxley made no attempt at getting up.

“No,” he sighed contentedly, “whoever it is can just come back later.”

It would turn out that Huxley wouldn’t need to get the door, as whoever had knocked opened it for themself.

“The heck…?” Huxley said, sitting up slightly.

A familiar voice rang through the house, “Huuuuux? Damiiii?”

The two boys sighed in relief, glad that the home intruder was just Freelancer. Sweet, innocent Freelancer-

“Are either of you here? I think I drained the town's water supply.”

Huxley immediately sat up, telling Dames that he would be right back. The fire elemental could only let out an affirmative hum in response as he tiredly laughed at the freelancer's antics.

Entering the front room, Huxley found Freelancer hovering by a window.

“Freelancer? Dude- why are you all wet??”

They turned to him, panting heavily, “I was walking here from Damien’s place, and the Dahlia Spring decided to start chasing me, so I started running, but that made the water faster, so I jumped into your neighbor's pool to escape.”

Huxley slowly approached the window, “holy shi- Freelancer, the entire street is flooded!”

“I knowww,” they whined, “I’m sorry. I would clean it up but I’m afraid I’ll level the entire neighborhood.”

“Okay, well… let- lets just get you dried off,” Hux said, taking Freelancer’s hand to lead them to the bathroom.

“Wait, wait,” they pulled away, “is Damien here?”

“Uh- yeah, he’s resting in the bedroom.”

Freelancer made their way to the room and peeked their head through the doorway to see Damien all bundled up, “oh god that’s adorable. Is he wearing your sweatshirt??”

“Shut up,” Damien groaned, his voice all muffled from the blankets. “Why are you here?”

Huxley appeared next to them with a towel, “jeez, dude. You’re freezing.”

“It’s the solstice,” Freelancer answered, stubbornly trying to push Huxley’s hands away as he desperately tried to dry them off. “I remembered that you’re sunbound, so I was like ‘Fireboy must be feeling like shit right now, and I, too, feel like shit,’ so here I am, to feel like shit with you.”

Freelancer paused, hissing in disapproval, as Huxley ruffled their hair dry.

“I went to your place first, though. Let myself in. I cleaned everything.”

Damien sat up a little, propping himself against the pillows, “you… cleaned everything?”

“Yeah,” they wavered, leaning against the wall, “and then I remembered I was looking for you, so- oh god-” they keeled over, “I’m gonna throw up-”

Before either of the boys could react, Freelancer had run to the bathroom.

IV.

Damien’s phone buzzed with notifications from the group chat.

Gavin: does anyone happen to know where the freelancer is? I swear I left them alone for five minutes

Lasko: yeah don’t worry they’re here at my place

Lasko: they randomly showed up and eventually passed out on the couch

Lasko: sorry I would have told you but I was doing paperwork

Gavin: it’s alright as long as they’re safe

Damien: Lasko, I think you should check your couch.

Lasko: what?

Lasko: why?

Damien: Just do it.

Lasko: um…

Gavin: ???

Lasko: I’m so sorry

Lasko: they’re not there

Lasko: I lost them

Gavin: how did you lose them!?!?

Lasko: how did you???

Damien: Calm down, they’re here at Hux’s place.

Damien: They showed up a couple minutes ago.

Damien: They’re puking in the toilet.

Gavin: oh thank god

Huxley returned to the room, a sleeping Freelancer in his arms, “Dames, they tried to escape through the window, and when they couldn’t they said, ‘I’m going to stop existing now,’ and passed out.”

Damien looked back at his phone.

Damien: Please come get them.

—

[sinkat-arts]

It’s 5am and I can’t sleep… so, I wrote a Daisuga Drabble about… not being able to sleep. Completely unedited and tapped out on my phone, so apologies if it reads terribly.

—

3AM

Daisuga, sexytimes implied but not written out

Insomnia struck at the worst times. If you asked him, Daichi would deny being an insomniac - it wasn’t a daily, weekly, or even monthly occurrence. But every so often, there were some nights when all he could do was lie in bed in a quiet rage, furious that he wasn’t sleeping... which, of course, only made it worse. He couldn’t sleep, so he was angry, and he was angry, so he couldn’t sleep - the insomnia ouroboros, repeating into eternity. Or at least until it was time to get up and get ready for work. 

Those nights had sucked when he lived alone, but now that he shared his bed, he was discovering that they were somehow worse. Tonight marked the first time insomnia reared its ugly head since he and Suga had decided to move in together, and it was like the sound of Suga’s measured breathing was taunting him. Somehow, the sound of someone he loved so dearly sleeping so peacefully next to him only added fuel to the fire. It wasn’t an entirely logical reaction, but logic was in short supply at 3:00 am on a weeknight. Especially when you needed to be awake in 4 hours.

It wasn’t for lack of trying that he couldn’t sleep, either. He’d cycled through so many strategies: white noise, rain sounds, meditation, hypnosis, melatonin, even those asmr recordings that Suga swore by but Daichi secretly thought were kind of creepy. Nothing really did the trick when his body, mind, or both just up and decided that he wasn’t sleeping that night. The best thing he could think of was simply to accept the situation. Instead of lying in bed angry at the world and becoming increasingly resentful of the fact that his boyfriend apparently came equipped with an off switch, he just gave in and decided to get up. There were plenty of things to be done - work to look over, books to read, something in the kitchen always needed cleaning -  he could at least be productive. 

Which was how Suga happened to find him on his hands and knees, wiping down the hallway baseboards at 3:30 am on a Monday morning. 

“I can’t say that I hate the view… but I have to ask… what the heck?” Suga’s voice came from somewhere behind him. 

“I’m… cleaning the baseboards?” Daichi answered, a little pinch of guilt for waking Suga up added itself to the heaping helping of embarrassment at being found doing something so damn weird in the middle of the night. He turned and saw Suga watching him, one hand on his hip and a look on his face that landed somewhere between puzzled and amused. 

“Yes, dear, I can see that. But why? Did I miss the memo that said the emperor was stopping by for breakfast?” 

“You didn’t get it?” Daichi asked, sitting back on his heels and giving Suga his best look of wide-eyed innocence. “7am sharp. You’re in charge of the table settings.” 

“Then I guess we’re in trouble. Unless the emperor finds mismatched chopsticks quaint…”

“Afraid not. It’s a fine china affair… damn, at this rate we’ll be the shame of the whole country. Maybe even the world…” 

Suga laughed. It never failed, even after all these years - the sound of Suga laughing always made Daichi’s heart thump… and when he was the cause of that laughter? There wasn’t anything better in the whole world… not even 8 hours of sleep. 

“But seriously… why are you cleaning the baseboards, you big weirdo?”

“I can’t sleep,” Daichi answered, folding the cleaning rag neatly into a little square and setting it down beside him. “Figured I should get something done,” grinning, he shrugged, “You know, instead of lying there plotting your murder because you, my love, snore.” 

In an instant, Suga’s face screwed up with indignation. “Don’t you ‘my love’ me - I do NOT snore!” Both hands were on his hips now. “And if you’re gonna murder me, at least do it for something less pedestrian. I deserve some scandal. If they don’t make a Netflix documentary about my death, what even is the point?” 

“You know… you’ve got me there,” Daichi said, chuckling as he pulled himself to his feet. He took the few steps needed to stand in front of Suga and wrapped his arms around his shoulders. Still smiling, he pressed a kiss against his forehead. “You deserve the best four-part true crime miniseries money can buy.”

“Four-part minimum,” Suga sniffed. He looked thoughtful for a moment, and then that mischievous twinkle sparked in his eyes. He sidled in closer, both hands dropping to grip Daichi’s hips, pulling the two of them together so there was no space in between. Biting his lower lip, Suga looked up into Daichi’s eyes. “Maybe you just have a little too much energy. I could… help you burn some off, you know.”

“Mmm,” Daichi hummed. His voice was cast low… in spite of the long hours he’d been awake, having Suga this close, with his fingers pressing into his hips like that? He was feeling the first spark of heat. Suga had his attention - it didn’t take much, not from him. He lowered his head, cocking it a little for a better angle, but stopping just millimeters short of the kiss Suga was most definitely expecting. Daichi could feel the anticipation coming off of him. “I could go get another cleaning cloth, if you really wanted to help…”

“Shut up,” Suga breathed and crossed that millimeter gap to press their lips together.

An hour later, coated in a thin sheen of sweat and utterly spent, Daichi was back in bed, lying on his back with the love of his life slotted in next to him. Suga’s head rested on his chest, and Daichi pressed a kiss into sweat-damp hair as he listened to the sound of his breathing as it settled. His own breathing fell into rhythm naturally, and they rose and fell together. 

He still couldn’t sleep. If anything, he was worse off than before, but… he couldn’t say he was still angry about it. How could he be mad when his heart was so full? The sun would rise soon, and their day would carry them apart to their separate destinations, but right now, this moment together in the dark, set to the sound of his sleeping lover’s breathing… it was peace and fulfillment and so much more love than he ever thought possible. It was everything. 

Well worth one sleepless Sunday and a miserable Monday, he’d say. 

[morethanweseem-a]

“But why does it have to be morning?  Would it be wrong if I used a little magic and just move the sun back a couple hours?”

[jeonsjiddies]

and then came you | pjm (m)

summary - Jimin was having a harder time getting over his unrequited love than he’d like to admit. He was desperate to escape the longing in his chest; he was searching for something to make him feel alive again. Jimin was about to give up hope that he’d ever find anything meaningful to cling to again, and then came you. 

rating- explicit 18+

word count-  7551

pairing- jimin x reader

genre- fluff, smut, angst

Warnings - a little angsty/ a little heartbreak at the beginning, some sexual harassment ( from an ex), mentions of cheating, thigh riding, ice play, creampie, multiple orgasms, slight dom!jimin, Oral (female receiving)

a/n - while this story can stand alone, it is based off the 8 letters AU, which can be found here. :) as usual, all the thanks in the world to @sweetnspicy93​ for all your help and thank you for urging me to give 8 letters Jimin his own happy ending. 

Jimin knew it was a bad idea, but he’d done it anyway. He would’ve done anything for the girl with the soft eyes and the bright smile, the girl who was now Namjoon’s. Jimin thought his crush was small enough that he’d be able to assist in making Namjoon jealous and walk away unscathed. At least she would be happy. That would be enough for Jimin. Or so he thought. 

Jimin’s mind wandered back to the way she looked on top of him, grinding her hips into his. His cock stirred at the memory. Of course, it had all been a show, strategically designed to make her roommate and crush jealous. That didn’t stop Jimin’s heart from slipping a beat when her core ground down onto his member. It didn’t stop Jimin from melting when she’d giggled and covered her face to hide it. Jimin knew it wasn’t real, he’d laughed off his boner, but he let himself enjoy the feeling of her skin under his tongue, the soft noises he drew from her which he knew weren’t completely fake. 

He felt empty, lost. Maybe he was being dramatic, but Jimin felt like he needed purpose. He’d feigned happiness when he saw her tucked into Namjoon’s loving embrace, congratulating the new couple as pieces of his heart chipped away and fell into the black hole of his chest. It seemed like his desire to do anything had faded away as quickly as his grasp on her. Now, he moped about his apartment, listening to the dull roar of the rain outside. It had been weeks since Namjoon had finally cracked and claimed her as his own, and Jimin was tired of feeling so… tired, dejected, lonely. 

Jimin decided he needed a change of scenery. The messy apartment with the dingy walls he had been cooped up in for weeks wasn’t doing anything to help him, he needed a fresh start. He didn’t give himself time to think about it, only packed a bag and scurried out the door, through the pouring rain to his car. He didn’t have a real plan, just decided to hit the open road and let his gut guide him until he found a place to explore. He drove through the rain, letting his excitement seep through his bones as he made random turns and took unplanned exits to get to his unknown adventure. 

Jimin drove for a few hours, deciding no matter where he went he wasn’t going to escape the dastardly rain. He took the next exit he saw, something in his chest guiding  him towards the small town it led to. Near the exit he saw a sign illuminated promising a hotel room for only $35 a night. Jimin, having nothing to lose, pulled into the parking lot. Entering the building and shaking the rain from his dripping hair, he looked around to find the front lobby devoid of any life. 

“Hello?” He called out. 

You didn’t hear him enter the building and couldn't see anything past the stack of boxes you were balancing. He didn’t see you coming around the corner. You tripped over a flipped up rug and went tumbling forward, boxes flying out of your hands and landing haphazardly on the tile floor, contents spilling out and rolling in different directions. You would’ve splattered on the floor much like the contents of the boxes had it not been for the beautiful stranger who currently cradled you in his strong arms. Your palms were pressed flat against his chest, and you could feel the toned muscle under your fingertips. Your gaze traveled up his neck and face until your eyes locked with the deep brown pools of his.  Though they were a dark color, they shone with the intensity of the sun, bright and vivid, so beautiful it almost hurt to look at. Your mouth hung open in shock for a moment at how gorgeous this man was before you came to your senses, stumbling back and out of his grip. 

“I am so so sorry! Are you alright?” You questioned, skimming over his body for any obvious signs of injury. You sighed in relief when you found none.

“I’m fine. Are you okay?” He wondered, eyes searching yours. 

“Yes, thanks to you. Thank you. For catching me.” You giggled nervously. 

“It’s not every day a beautiful girl throws herself into my arms. Couldn’t pass up the opportunity.” He winked playfully.

You blushed and looked down to hide it and squeaked in surprise, scrambling to collect the contents of the boxes. Jimin leaned down to help you, collecting items and tucking them safely in the box before lifting it and following you to the counter where the both of you set them down. 

“Thank you, again.” you smiled, taking your place behind the desk. “Were you looking for a room?”

“Yes, please.” he grinned back at you, his tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip. 

Your eyes lingered on the action a little longer than was socially acceptable before you shook yourself back to reality and searched the old, worn down computer system for available rooms.

“Okay, I’ve got a double queen and a single king available. Which would you prefer? They’re both non-smoking rooms.” you smiled politely.

“The single king, it’s only me.” Jimin sighed, his sunshine filled eyes dimming a bit.

“Okay!” you tried not to show your concern, but selected the room and input your employee discount.

“How many nights?” you asked, glancing back up at him.

“Ummm…” he trailed off, looking away as he thought carefully. “Let’s go with seven. For now.” 

“Okay, a one week stay…” your fingers tapped at the keys, and you rung up his total. 

“Okay that will be $187.25. Cash or card?” you smiled sweetly. 

“That doesn’t sound right… it’s for 7 nights right? $35 a night?” he confirmed. 

“I, um, put my employee discount in for you…” you admitted shyly, avoiding his gaze. “It made it $25 a night, plus tax. We’re allowed to give the employee price to friends and family and I was thankful for your help.”

Jimin watched you for a moment, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as he appraised you.

“Thank you. That’s… really sweet. Probably the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me.” his voice lowered at the end, as if that part was a secret.

“Well, you helped me. I helped you.” you shrugged, trying to play it off and hoping he wouldn’t notice the blaze in your cheeks.

Your hands brushed when he handed over his card and you audibly gasped at the shockwave that shot through you when his skin met yours. His mouth parted in shock as well and you both locked eyes for a moment. One heartbeat passed. Two. The only sound in the lobby was both of you sucking in shaky breaths. 

You gulped, pulling your hand away and swiping his card through the reader. You handed it and a receipt back to him, careful not to touch him again and smiled the most professional smile you could muster. You reached behind you and pulled the corresponding keycard out of its slot and handed it over as well.

“Room 318. If you need anything, you can call me. The front desk number is 0. I’ll be here until 7am, but if you find that Mina is a little too… blunt?..for your taste, I’m actually right down the hall in 338.” you explained.

You weren’t sure why you told him that, you never offered that information to any other customers. Something about him just pulled you in. You wanted to protect him. You wanted to know what was going on in his mind, what could possibly be dimming those glittering eyes. You were enamoured by him, intrigued, fascinated really. 

“Thank you for the heads up…” he trailed off, eyes scanning your shirt for a name badge.

“Y/N. And you?” you offered.

“Jimin.” he beamed at you, causing your heart to skip a beat for probably the 92nd time since you’d laid eyes on him.

“It’s very nice to meet you Jimin. I hope you enjoy your stay.” you told him sincerely.

“I think I will.” he winked, making his way down the hallway towards his room.

*** Jimin couldn’t sleep. He was used to tossing and turning and lying awake until the sun came up, he was no stranger to the way his mind whirled when the silence crept in. He kept himself busy during the day, but when the sun went down, the restlessness set in. Jimin hated the silence. He hated being alone. He glanced at the clock, it was midnight. He sighed and shoved himself out of bed, slipping on his shoes and making his way down to the coffee bar he’d spotted earlier. 

He filled two cups, fixing one the way he liked it and leaving the other black, but grabbing a couple of cream and sugar packets to bring with him. He peered around the corner to see if you were busy before he entered the lobby. You were sat on a stool behind the desk, head leaning on your hand as you struggled to stay awake. Jimin smiled, turning the corner and setting the coffee in front of you.

“Looks like you might need this more than I do.” he grinned, taking a sip of his own. “I wasn’t sure how you liked it so I just brought the extras to you.”

“Oh my gosh. My hero.” you cooed, ripping open the sugar and creamers and dumping them in before taking a sip.

Your head lolled back blissfully and you moaned quietly. Jimin’s eyes widened at the unexpected lewd sound rolling off your pink lips and had to discreetly adjust himself before you noticed the way his sweats got a little tighter. 

“You saved my life. How can I ever repay you?” you giggled. 

“Keep me company? I can’t sleep.” he whined.  

“I’m not going anywhere until 7. You’re welcome to hang out with me here.” you offered.

Jimin hopped up on the desk, swinging his legs back and forth as he peered down at you. You rolled your eyes with a smile.

“Where are you from?” you asked him.

“Just a few hours south of here.” he answered. “I couldn’t get far in the rain.”

“Oh, you aren’t to your destination yet? Why did you book seven days then?” you wondered aloud.

“I didn’t really have a destination in mind. I just wanted to leave for a while. I had nothing holding me there anymore, and I thought a change of scenery would be nice. So I just kinda went where I felt like going and ended up here.” he shrugged.

“Your grand adventure led you to our little town?” you laughed.

“It’s got it’s charms.” he smirked.

You bit your lip and looked down, willing the blush on your cheeks to chill out. Jimin chuckled, the vibrations of his body shaking your desk.

“So what do you plan on doing now that you’re here?” you asked.

“I don’t really have a plan. I just felt kind of suffocated and needed to get out of my dingy apartment and that stupid town.” he left off the part about how SHE was everywhere he went when he did venture outside his apartment, and how every time he saw her hand laced with Namjoons bile rose in his throat.

“Well, on behalf of our tiny town, welcome. I hope you find what you’re searching for.” you smiled.

Jimin stayed perched on your desk for hours, until the sun started streaming through the blinds in the lobby, filling the room with a soft glow. In your opinion, though, the light wafting through the space couldn’t dare compare to the light that came from Jimin. When his head was thrown back and his body shook and his smile reached from ear to ear while giggles and chuckles fell from his pillowy lips, Jimin shone brighter than the sun could ever hope to. 

You both got more comfortable as the night went on, delving into deeper topics, more personal ones. You told each other stories, shared your hopes for the future, It honestly felt like you’d known him your whole life. The conversation flowed easily, there weren’t any awkward pauses or times when neither of you could fill the silence, unsure of what to say. It was easy with Jimin. Being around him made you feel lighter, less broken. Like the light inside of him was seeping out and filling you with hope too. 

You could tell there was something on his mind, something plaguing him. Who else stays up talking to a hotel clerk until the wee hours of the morning? He was running from something when he left without a plan, but he didn’t offer much information on it. Despite the darkness that sometimes threatened to break through his cheery exterior, Jimin was just… bright. It was who he was, a part of him. He was warm, friendly, and welcoming. 

Neither of you had realized the time until the front door of the lobby swung open and Mina shuffled through, her ever-present scowl plastered on her weathered face. She glared at Jimin the moment she saw him. His eyes widened in fear and he slipped his bottom off of the desk, backing away from it. You sent him a look that said ‘I told you so.’

“Shifts over. Go.” she grunted, pointing her disappointed gaze at you.

You nodded quietly, gathering your purse and walking over to Jimin, who was almost cowering in the corner. You nodded for him to follow you out of the lobby and only spoke once you were out of earshot.

“See what I mean?” you giggled.

“She’s terrifying.” he whisper-hissed.

“She’s old and everything hurts. I’d probably be mean if I had to work here at her age too.” you shrugged, “but yeah if you need anything come find me. She definitely didn’t like the way you were sitting on the desk.”

Jimin nodded, covering his mouth as he stifled a yawn. You laughed.

“Did I wear you out talking your ear off?” you teased.

“No, that was the most fun I’ve had in a while to be honest.” he chuckled. 

“Happy to help.” you smiled shyly, pausing in front of his room with him. 

He hovered by the door but made no move to go in. You didn’t make a move to leave either. You both laughed at how ridiculous you were being. You placed your hand on his arm.

“Goodnight Jimin, sleep well.” 

Suddenly, Jimin pulled you towards him, his arms wrapping tightly around your frame, head resting in the crook of your neck. You melted into his embrace, allowing your arms to circle around his body as well. 

“Thank you for keeping me company.” he quietly spoke, warm breath hitting your ear and making you shiver.

“Any time, Jimin.” you answered back just as quietly. 

He pulled back and sent you a smile before he slipped inside his room. You slowly made your way back to yours, every inch of your skin tingling, relishing the way it felt to be held by him, even for just a moment. In the  arms of his stranger was the first time you’d ever felt like you were home. 

You and Jimin had developed a nightly routine. Each night, he’d show up around midnight and perch himself on your desk, gifting you a cup of coffee (which he tailored to your tastes now.) The two of you would talk and laugh and just enjoy each other’s presence throughout the night. Maybe you should’ve gotten bored spending so much time together but you never ran out of things to talk about. 

It felt like he’d always been there and he always would be. Even Mina seemed to get used to seeing Jimin when she arrived. She wasn’t friendly but she’d stopped sending him evil looks, which was quite the compliment from her. You found yourself looking forward to work rather than dreading it.  Your favorite part of each day was the time you got to spend with Jimin. On the 4th night of this routine, Jimin wrapped you up in your nightly hug. You’d be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t wait all night for this part, longing to be wrapped up in his embrace, however fleeting the moment may be. 

That night, Jimin surprised you. When he pulled away from your hug you felt his pillowy soft lips rest upon your cheek in a chaste kiss. The moment was over before you had time to process what was happening and Jimin smiled innocently at you.

“Goodnight, Y/N. Sweet dreams.” 

You stood frozen in place, letting your hand come up to touch your cheek where his lips had just been. His lips were so soft, so plush, and you longed to feel them against your own. Your cheek burned in the best way where the lingering heat from his lips stayed. You couldn’t stop the goofy smile from spreading across your face. 

That was until you rounded the corner to get to your room and walked face first into the chest of the man you despised more than anything else. Your ex boyfriend, Stuart, loomed over your like a predator stalking it’s prey, using his large body mass to trap you against the wall. He reeked of alcohol and you rolled your eyes at the familiar scent. 

“What are you doing here? Get off of me.” You hissed. 

“Awww don’t sound so disappointed, Y/N. Don’t you miss me?” He cooed, one finger sliding it’s way up the side of your face. 

“No.” You spit. “Get the fuck off of me.”

“Come on baby… don’t you want to have a little fun?” He smirked and your stomach threatened to release your midnight snack all over his button up shirt. 

“Let me get one thing through your thick ass skull, I will NEVER touch you again. Do you understand?” You hissed through gritted teeth 

“Don’t be like this. Just unlock the door. We can go in your room and play around like we used to. You used to like it when I showed up like this.”

“That was before I found out you were fucking half the town behind my back.” You threw back at him. “If you think I’ll ever get with you again you’re insane.” 

“Quit playing hard to get and open the fucking door.” He growled. 

“I believe she said no.” 

Your gaze snapped to the voice that had just spoken, your eyes landing on Jimin, who was carrying his ice bucket. His eyes were swimming with concern for you but he stood tall and held his ground, refusing to be intimidated by the giant drunk moron who had you pinned to the wall.

“This isn’t any of your business. Fuck off.” Stuart hissed. 

“Actually it kind of is. You’re sexually harassing my friend.” Jimin spoke evenly, keeping a calm persona. 

“You know this clown?” Stuart asked you. 

“Yeah. He’s my friend.” You shrugged.

“You little slut, you’re letting him hit it aren’t you? Bitching at me for having a little fun but you’ll bust it open for anyone huh?” Stuart goaded you.

“Well Stuart, I don’t really think that’s any of your business.” You growled.

“If you’ll put out for him you better put out for me.” He hissed. 

Jimin’s fist connected with Stuart’s jaw before you could reply or react. Stuart stumbled back in surprise and Jimin took the opportunity to grab your hand and sprint down the hallway with you in tow. A roar of rage sounded from behind the two of you which only fueled your legs to move faster. Nearing a T in the hallway, you made a split second decision to shove Jimin into the supply closet and shut the door.

Stuart wasn’t smart enough, especially while drunk, to think of that as an option and you strained your ears to listen as his footsteps clomped past the storage closet, pausing before retreating down the hallway. You let out a sigh of relief, looking up to meet Jimin’s gaze. It was then that you realized how close you were. Your noses almost touching, you could feel his ragged breaths against your skin. You told yourself it was from the running.

“Are you okay?” He whispered. 

“Yes, thanks to you. You keep rescuing me.” You grinned. 

“Well, call me Prince Charming then.” He laughed quietly. “Do you think he’s gone?” 

“I’m not sure. We should probably wait it out.” You sighed.

“Why don’t you call the police?” Jimin wondered.

“His dads the sheriff. He won’t do anything.” You huffed.

Jimin shifted, trying to maneuver around you to set down the ice bucket he was holding. He opted to place it on the floor, bending down to set it beside the two of you. He misjudged the space between your bodies as he stood up, stumbling forward a little, his face ended up in your cleavage, his lips brushing against your cloth covered nipple. He froze in shock, unable to peel himself from your breast. His breath circled your nub, damp and warm. You let out a breathy moan at the feeling and your eyes immediately widened in panic. 

Jimin straightened his posture, eyes locked on yours and lips parted in amazement. Neither of you spoke or dared to move. You could feel his chest rising and falling rapidly, brushing against your own each time in the cramped space. Jimin could feel his cock stirring to attention in his sweats and decided it was time to check if the coast was clear. He cleared his throat and opened the closet door, slipping his head out and checking both directions.

“I don’t see him anymore.” Jimin told you quietly.

You nodded and followed him towards your room. You paused in front of his, shaking with anxiety when he looked at you in confusion. 

“Jimin… I’m scared. Can I… can I stay with you? I’m worried he’s going to come back and I-“ you rambled bit Jimin put you out of your misery. 

“Of course, come on.” He unlocked the door and ushered you inside. 

You followed him inside, thanking him quietly and following him like a lost puppy to the middle of the room.

“Make yourself comfortable. Do you want me to turn on a movie?” He asked. “Are you hungry or thirsty?”

“I’m okay, but I won’t turn down the movie.” You smiled gratefully. 

Jimin flipped on the tv and sat at the opposite side of the bed, careful to give you room and made sure he was under the covers so you couldn’t see his semi. You got under the blankets too, but still shivered in the cold of his room. 

“Are you still cold? I don’t think I have a clean sweater…” he thought out loud, wracking his brain for ideas. 

“It’s fine! I’ll warm up soon.” You assured him. 

Things shifted back to normal for the most part, but there was a lingering tension in the air neither of you were willing to talk about. You fell into easy conversation about the movie, giggling and poking fun at the plot holes together. You continued to shiver despite your best efforts not to show how cold you were. Jimin sighed. 

“Come here.” He instructed. 

“Hmm?” You questioned. 

“Come over here and let me warm you up, you’re making me feel bad.” Jimin motioned for you to join him on his side of the bed. 

“Really I’m fine-“ you began but the look on Jimin’s face had you obeying his command in an instant, crawling your way over to him and snuggling up beside him as he wrapped an arm around you and pulled the blanket up to cover you both, trapping the heat of both of your bodies. 

The hotel mattress was lumpy and uneven, but you’d never been more comfortable in your life. Jimin’s arm wrapped around your shoulder so it wasn’t sandwiched between the two of you and you molded yourself against his side even closer. Your bodies fit perfectly together and it made your heart beat faster than normal. You only hoped Jimin couldn’t hear it. When the movie ended, Jimin switched off the tv and laid down. You followed suit, pressing your body up against his and resting your head on his shoulder, your hand on his chest.

“Tell me something I don’t already know about you.” you requested, voice soft in an attempt not to disturb the peaceful atmosphere.

“What haven’t I told you yet?” Jimin chuckles to himself. 

“What’s the real reason you’re here?” you pondered, bracing yourself for him to close himself off.

Jimin sighed, and you were about to apologize and change the subject when he nodded, glancing over at you.

“Actually, I was kind of running away. I had this friend, and I liked her but she liked her roommate. He likes her too but wasn’t doing anything about it, so we fake dated to make him jealous. I know it’s immature but he needed a push. I wanted her to be happy but didn’t realize how I’d feel seeing them together all the time. It’s actually kind of nice, I haven’t thought about her in days.” Jimin explained.

“I’m sorry Jimin. You’re a wonderful guy and you deserve someone who appreciates you.” You told him, eyes searching his face. 

“Thank you.” He scrunched his nose up in that cute way that made your heart clench. “Tell me something I don’t know about you.”

You wracked your brain for information you hadn’t already provided to Jimin during your nightly talks. You noticed then that Jimin was shifting beside you, growing antsy with the vulnerability of the conversation, you assumed. In an attempt to lighten the mood, you threw out the first thing you could think of.

“Hmmm… I can touch my nose with my tongue.” you lied with the best straight face you could muster.

“No way. Show me.” Jimin laughed, turning to watch you.

You stuck your tongue out and tried your hardest to push it far enough to touch the tip of your nose, but failed miserably. You refused to give up and kept trying, making silly faces while attempting to reach. Jimin couldn’t control the laughter bubbling from deep in his belly at your ridiculous antics. 

His smile reached both ears, and Jimin watched you make a fool of yourself, realizing that he hadn’t felt so light and carefree in the longest time, even before the incident with Namjoon and his new girlfriend. Something about being near you just made Jimin turn into a version of himself that he actually liked. Being around you made him feel like it might actually be okay. 

The two of you shared hushed whispers for a while, Jimin absentmindedly drawing shapes on the soft flesh of your hand that rest on his chest. The whispers died down and you were left with the quiet humming of the air conditioning kicking on and off periodically and the sound of Jimin’s even breathing. You lifted your head to see if he was asleep and watched his chest move with each inhale. You allowed yourself to study his features up close. You couldn’t help yourself, reaching out and letting your fingers brush against the skin of his jaw, a featherlight touch in the hopes of not waking him. 

Jimin stirred slightly and you held your breath, ceasing all body movements. You watched his eyes flutter before stilling. He snuggled farther into the blanket and sighed happily. You waited a few moments before returning to your exploration. Your fingers danced lightly towards his lips, letting yourself marvel at how full and soft they were. Your thumb brushed against the tender flesh, and Jimin’s tongue darted out to wet them. You removed your fingers from his warm, now wet mouth. 

His eyelashes fanned across his cheeks delicately, and you gently ran a finger along them, watching them flutter under your touch. You sighed, completely in awe of how beautiful the man next to you truly was. He was painfully attractive, that was a given. But he was also smart, funny, kind, open. You found yourself idly wondering how anyone could pass him up, but you were honestly not upset that she had. It was a stupid daydream, you knew that. There was no way he was into you. But you couldn’t stop yourself from imagining what it might be like to show Jimin the kind of love he’d been missing, the kind he was so clearly desperate to find. 

If anyone deserved to feel raw, unconditional love, you had no doubt that Jimin did. He was so sweet and friendly and had so much love to give in return. You wanted to watch those eyes light up, see how brightly he could shine when properly adored. You wanted to be that for him. He shuffled in his sleep, mumbling something under his breath and his arms reached out, seeking your warmth. He brought you flush against him, enveloping you in his warm embrace. You smiled to yourself and carded your fingers through his silky hair. 

You let yourself melt into his hold, feeling welcome and needed and wanted. You began fading in and out of consciousness, the comfort and safety of having Jimin so close putting your mind at ease. You fell asleep to the sound of his strong, steady heartbeat, which sounded a lot like your new favorite song.

You woke up before Jimin, the sunlight finding its way through the thin curtain that covered the large window of his hotel room. You blinked a few times and tried to sit up, but Jimin’s arms instinctively wrapped around you tighter, holding you in place against his firm body. You grinned, snuggling back into his embrace and pressing yourself up against him. That’s when you felt something hard pressing against your backside. You experimentally wiggled your hips against Jimin’s, wondering if it was what you thought it was. His sleepy moan and the friction against your bottom proved your suspicions correct. 

Your eyes widened and you bit your lip as arousal pooled in between your legs. Jimin’s rock hard cock pressed against your backside made your head spin. You attempted to remove yourself from his grasp but that only made him hug you closer, effectively pressing his erection against you more. You whimpered quietly, torn between not disturbing Jimin and relieving the ache between your thighs. You pushed your bottom farther into him, hoping to gain a little friction. Suddenly, his hand gripped down on your hip, stilling your movements. 

“What are you doing?” He questioned, his morning voice raspy and deep. 

“I...uh….” you gulped, heat flooding to your cheeks at having been caught grinding against him.

You tried to flee, but Jimin’s firm grip on your hip didn’t lessen, his fingers dug into your skin deliciously. 

“It looks like you were grinding your pretty little ass on my cock.” He purred, his hand sliding from your hip to grasp the fleshy globe of your bottom, giving it a rough squeeze. 

“Ah, fuck.” You squeaked out at his possessive actions, you leaned into his touch and brought a chuckle from him. 

“Hmmmm… you like that?” He chuckled, “you like when I touch you?”

“Yes.” You gasped as his hands traveled farther up to cup your breast, giving it a light squeeze. 

“So needy. Why don’t you do something about it?” He prodded. 

Your brain was fuzzy, you weren’t even registering his words. You didn’t think about what you were doing, you just let your body take control as you turned around then swung a leg over his lap and straddled him. Jimin’s words died in his throat and his mouth hung open in shock. You didn’t let yourself think or slow down, knowing you’d chicken out if you did. You pressed your lips to his in a needy kiss, which he reciprocated after he processed that it was happening. 

His hands found purchase in your hair, tugging gently as his tongue explored your mouth. You moaned into his mouth when his free hand pinched and rolled your nipple between his fingers. You began to grind your hips down onto his, delighting in the way his cock felt dragging up and down your clothed folds. Jimin groaned, letting his head fall back and hit the headboard with a quiet thud before he lifted it and grabbed your hips, holding them still.

“Wait, wait.” he panted.

“What’s wrong?” your hips stilled, embarrassment flooding your cheeks.

“It’s uh, been a while, and if you do that I’m going to cum in my pants.” he admitted sheepishly. 

You bit your lip to hide your giggle when an idea flashed in your mind. You moved your hips so you were straddling his thigh rather than his crotch. You began to rock your hips again and Jimin’s eyes darkened as he stared at the spot where your sex met his thigh. 

“Holy shit, you look so sexy right now…” he hummed thoughtfully, his hands coming to rest on your hips again only to grind you down harder on his toned muscle.

The arousal pooling between your legs was soaking through your clothing, and you were certain Jimin would feel it soaking his flimsy sweats soon. You whimpered at the friction on your clit and when Jimin tensed his thigh it sent a wave of pleasure through you.

His fingers found the edge of your shirt and he glanced at your face to make sure it was okay. When you nodded, he lifted it off of your frame and tossed it aside. He licked his lips as he surveyed your skimpy bra. His lips attached themselves to the tops of your breast while his hands slipped behind you to unclasp the fabric preventing him from seeing all of your upper half. The bra fell off your shoulders and Jimin whisked it away, taking a moment to admire your breasts.

“I think I might have died if I didn’t get a chance to have a proper taste of these.” he hummed, eyes flicking up to yours as a smirk graced his lips.

“Fuck, Jimin.” You whimpered pathetically as electricity shot to your core. 

Almost immediately, his lips were on your nipples.His soft, plump lips sucked at your sensitive nub, his teeth gently scraping along the flesh. Your movements on his thigh stuttered, your mind going blank at the shivers coursing through you. His tongue darted out and swirled around your nipple, before he moved his delicious assault to the other breast. This time, he bit down, pulling the nub between his teeth. You yelped, arching your body closer to him as the sinfully pleasurable pain raced through your veins.

Jimin smirked against your skin, biting and soothing it with the flat of his tongue afterwards. He blew cold air against the red marks on your breasts, and you shivered. Your hips picked up speed the closer you got to letting go and Jimin sensed you were near your high. His fingers dipped past the waistband of your pants and panties, and he began rubbing your clit harshly, until you were just about to fly off the edge, then he ripped his hand away and held you still.

“What the fuck?!” you whined.

“You don’t cum until I say you do.” he growled, “you were a very bad girl, rubbing up against me and teasing me, using me for your own pleasure. So fucking sexy.” 

You whined, trying to rock your hips against him once more, but Jimin was stronger than you. He grabbed your waist and flipped you over so he was hovering above you. The tips of his fingers teasing at your waistband. Your breath caught in your throat, the palpable tension growing thicker with each passing moment. He quickly discarded his own shirt, giving you the most glorious view of his toned chest and stomach. 

You made no attempt to disguise the way you ogled him. You licked your lips seductively as your eyes raked over his body, drinking him in. You reached up to let your hands rake down his chest, fingers tracing the lines of his abs and brushing over his nipples on the way down. His body jerked and you smiled to yourself. Your perusal of his body came to rest at the elastic in his sweats.

“Someone’s eager.” Jimin quipped.

“Someone might not be so eager if she’d been allowed to cum.” you huffed, tugging the sweats and boxers down in one smooth  motion. 

Jimin laughed, standing up and kicking the clothing off of his body before crawling back onto the bed.

“Mouthy little slut. Don’t you know only good girls get to cum?” he shot back, pressing you flat against the mattress and kissing down your neck.

You squirmed under his touch while he worked his way down your body, stopping just above your aching sex. He placed a soft kiss to your clothed folds, making your body react and arch closer, seeking relief. He chuckled to himself and shed you of any remaining clothing. The contrast of the cool air meeting your aching heat caused a shiver to rip through your body. Something lit up in Jimin’s eyes and he removed himself from the bed and walked over to the mini fridge, opening the freezer compartment.  You watched curiously as he returned with the small ice bucket he’d filled before finding you last night.

“Feeling thirsty?” you joked. 

Jimin raised an eyebrow, shooting you a half-smile before taking an icecube and running it over your already hard nipple. You cried out, the stark contrast of his warm hands with the freezing cold of the icecube was divine. You watched as it slowly melted, water droplets rolling off your body and falling onto the bed.

“Jimin…” you whimpered.

“Mmm?” he smirked, repeating the action on the other breast.

Your back arched, seeking more from the man above you. He was playing you like an instrument, and he knew all the right notes. You were putty in his hands, and he knew it. It stroked his ego more than you would’ve cared for but at this point you would’ve done anything to get some attention on your sodden pussy.

Jimin popped an icecube in his mouth and moved up to kiss you. It rolled around between your tongues until it melted between your combined heat. Jimin kissed the tip of your nose before moving his face down between your legs. He pressed his tongue flat against your clit, and the coldness from the icecube that he’d just had in his mouth stunned you. He left your clit to tease along your folds, letting his tongue dart experimentally inside your heat. 

You groaned,writhing underneath his ministrations. He flicked the tip of his tongue against your clit quickly, building the heat in your belly as he moved. He slipped two fingers inside you, curling them and hitting that delicious spot with every pump. He paused for a moment, and suddenly there was something very cold and very wet pressing against your walls. 

You gasped, the ice pressing against you as Jimin moved it in and out with his tongue. The melting liquid joined your slick and spilled out of your hole while Jimin flicked his tongue, and the remaining ice against that spot that drove you wild. Once the ice was gone, and you were panting enough for Jimin’s liking, he doubled down on his efforts, tongue pressing against your walls and fingers working beside it while his other hand worked your clit in small, deliberate circles.

Jimin pulled away abruptly, and you nearly began crying as another orgasm slipped away.You groaned in frustration, reaching down to play with your own clit but Jimin caught your wrists and clicked his tongue.

“Nuh uh, darling. What did I say? You don’t cum unless I tell you to.” he purred, licking a bold stripe along the veins in your wrist, which was strangely erotic.  “I want you to beg for it.” 

“What?” you hissed.

“Beg me to cum. Beg for my cock.” he smirked.

You sighed audibly, and Jimin just watched you, the smirk still pasted on his stupidly handsome face.

“Please…” you mumbled.

“I’m sorry, what was that darling?” Jimin chuckled. “I can’t hear you.”

“Please fuck me, Jimin. I need to cum. Please!” you whined, all of your pride flying out the window as your pussy clenched around nothing.

“That’s my good girl.” he cooed.

“Please hurry.” you whined.

“Shit. I don’t… I don’t have a condom.” Jimin realized out loud, shoulders slumping.

“I have an IUD and I’m clean.” you panted, fingers wrapping around his neck and bringing him to meet your lips. “Are you?”

“I’m clean,” he assured.

“Then fuck me.” you whispered, nibbling on his ear.

Jimin wasted no time obliging your request. He lined himself up with your entrance and slid in smoothly, aided by your dripping arousal, courtesy of your two denied orgasms and the skills of his tongue. Jimin bottomed out, both of you emitting a low groan. Jimin wasn’t super long, but his girth more than made up for it, as well as his ability to move his hips in the most delectable ways. He filled you up perfectly, hitting spots inside you that you were unaware even existed. 

“Jimin.” you moaned, clawing at his back as he thrust in and out of you at a painfully slow pace.

“Say it again.” he whispered, hips picking up speed.

“Jimin.” you repeated.

“Louder.” he growled, snapping his hips in and out of you with vigor.

“Fuck! Jimin!” you cried. 

Jimin pounded in and out of you, causing your body to bounce with each movement of his hips. He loved the way your breasts bounced and the way you bit down harshly on your lip, overwhelmed with pleasure. His head fell into your neck as he pistoned his hips against yours, one hand sneaking between your joined bodies to expertly rub at your clit. You could no longer form a coherent sentence,gibberish falling from your lips as the familiar fire built deep inside you. 

“Jimin.” you warned, your cunt clenching around him.

“Are you gonna cum for me? Cum all over my cock? Do it, baby. Cum for me.” he coaxed.

His teeth sinking into your neck was the last push you needed before you were careening off the edge. Your body trembled at the most intense orgasm you’d ever experienced in your life. White dots clouded your vision and you screamed so loud your throat felt raw. Jimin came soon after you, working you both through your shared euphoria. His thrusts slowed and he stilled inside you, breathing as heavy as your own.

“Holy shit.” he groaned, and you could feel his muscles shaking just as much as your own.

He pulled out of you, watching in awe as his cum seeped out of your beaten hole. He slid a finger along your folds, gathering his seed and bringing it up to your lips. You obediently opened your mouth, wrapping your tongue around his fingers and sucking them clean, the taste of your own slick combined with his cum coating your tongue. Jimin shivered at the sight.

“Fuck, you’re perfect.” he sighed breathlessly.

He stood up, walking into the bathroom to dampen a towel with warm water and bring it back to the bed, gently cleaning you up. You bit your lip, suddenly feeling vulnerable under his gaze. He made his way back into the bed, snuggling up next to you and pulling you into his arms. He watched your expressions and you watched him. You both giggled nervously.

“Do you maybe… want to go out sometime?” he asked, teeth raking over his bottom lip nervously.

“I’d like that.” you giggled, hiding your face in his chest.

You both lay there in comfortable silence, holding each other while your breathing returned to normal. You nodded off, spent from the activities of the morning, and it was Jimin’s turn to watch your peaceful face as you slept. His eyes trailed over your features, adoration and a tinge of something more filling him. True, Jimin had arrived in this small town running away from something. He was searching for something to make him feel anything but the jealousy and pain that had settled deep in his chest. Jimin felt like he was running toward something now, a possibility of the two of you. He knew he wasn’t “fixed”, but he felt good with you, whole with you. 

Jimin knew both of you had a lot of learning to do, and a long way to go and a long way to grow, but he couldn’t stop the excitement bubbling in his chest because for the first time in what seemed like forever, Jimin was happy. Truly, unabashedly happy. He’d started this journey of his running. He thought he’d never recover from the darkness that had taken him over. He thought he’d never find joy again. Jimin had gone desperately searching for something to give him hope.

And then came you.

[fatoomie2801]

his queen | kyoya tategami

💫 preview 💫

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The door slammed open, causing Kiara to jolt awake and look around cautiously, before placing her hand on her chest after she concluded that it was just Kyoya standing in the doorway. She diverted her attention to the clock on the wall opposite her. 7AM?!

"What's up with that, Kyoya?" she muttered tiredly, annoyance present in her voice.

"Wake up," he spoke sternly.

"It's 7am!" she yelled.

"And?" he retorted.

"Get out and let me sleep," she groaned, retreating under her covers.

"Today's your first day of training. Get your ass up or I'll leave without you," Kyoya warned before leaving, shutting the door with a loud bang in order to wake the sleepyhead. He's so annoying for no reason, she thought. I should annoy him too, sometime.

Kiara hopped out of bed to prepare herself for the day ahead of her. After getting ready, she climbed up the spiral staircase and met with Kyoya outside the mechanic shop. He began to walk in the direction that led to the marketplace, confusing the girl as he had not said a single word to her about where they were headed.

"Where are we going?" she asked, falling behind. "Kyoya? Kyoya!"

Not a word. The boy didn't answer so she had no choice but to simply follow him and go wherever he went. Although she could spot his spiky green hair from a mile away, it wasn't the easiest thing to keep up with him. Why does he walk so fast? she wondered, frustratedly. After passing through the busy marketplace, they arrived at the bridge by the river where she had told him about her ex and her brother. Why are we here?

She had paused momentarily to observe the glittering river she loved so much, taking in the tranquil environment around her, before she realised that Kyoya was nowhere to be seen.

"Ugh, where did he go?" she sighed, looking around for any sign of green hair.

"I'm right here," she heard his voice in the distance and looked to her right to see him leaning against a warehouse a few metres away from the other end of the bridge. "Stop staring at the river and hurry up." The girl turned away from the beautiful sight of the water and made her way to the boy, following him into the warehouse.

"What is this place?" she enquired. "Wait, wait, wait. Isn't this the Face Hunters' old hideout?"

"You know about that?" Kyoya asked, confused. "Ugh, Benkei," he sighed under his breath, realising how Kiara had come to find out about his embarrassing past.

"Oh yeah. He told me all about how you were supposed to be some scary gang leader but then you lost to Gingka and disbanded the gang. Haha. Pussy," the girl laughed.

"What did you call me?!" Kyoya glared daggers into Kiara's soul.

"P. U. S. S. Y. Pussy," she teased, unafraid.

"Right. I'm leaving," Kyoya spoke, turning to face the door.

"Listen, if you get to wake me up like that at 7 in the fucking morning, then I get to make fun of you for being some stupid gang leader!" she yelled at the boy who had now left the warehouse. Once she realised he wasn't coming back, she went after him. Looks like he can't take a joke, Kiara told herself. Oof.

"Wait!" she exclaimed, grabbing his arm. He immediately retracted his arm and stared down at the girl.

"Don't touch me!" he warned, his finger pointed in her face.

"Alright, sorry," she apologised, raising her hands in defeat. "You're still gonna train me right? You're not pissed off or anything?"

"You're annoying. But I'll tolerate it just this once," he sighed, lowering his hand. This is a waste of my time, he thought. "Come," he instructed, walking back into the warehouse. "And don't try any funny business with me or I'll leave for real."

"Fine," she sulked, following him.

"Get your bey out," he ordered. Kiara took her bey out from her bey holder and attached it to her launcher. "You see that box?" he gestured to a large, brown wooden box that was placed in the centre of the large space. "Break it."

Kiara nodded, launching Cassiopeia. How hard can this be? she wondered. "Go now!" The bey made contact with the box, ramming itself against it but causing no damage before falling to the floor.

"Weak," Kyoya scoffed. Kiara glared at him. "Try again."

Cassiopeia was launched a second time, making contact with the box but still causing no damage. Kiara groaned, picking up her bey and attempting to break the box a third, fourth, fifth, and sixth time.

"Took me one attempt to do this," Kyoya uttered, his arms crossed as he leant against another box.

"You're joking," Kiara commented, looking in his direction. "There's no way that you managed to break it on your first try."

"Oh, believe me. I did." No I didn't, of course I didn't, Kyoya told himself. She's an idiot. But I'm sure this'll work.

Kiara groaned again in annoyance.

"I'm gonna go," the boy informed her, making his way out.

"Huh? Where are you going? Kyoya?"

"Don't get your undies in a twist. I'll be in one of the other warehouses."

Kyoya left Kiara on her own with the box. Well, if he can do it, then so can I, she thought. Kiara tried at the same task over and over again but made no progress. Okay, this is much harder than I thought. Upon closer inspection of the box, she noticed a small scratch. It might be small, but it's still a scratch.

The next few hours were, of course, spent trying to break the one wooden box. Kiara gave up trying as she now thought it was impossible to break it. Ugh, how come he was able to do it? That's not fair! She slumped on the floor in defeat and played around with her new bey, inspecting each and every nook and cranny until she got bored. She then lay on the floor and began singing songs in order to keep herself entertained while she waited for Kyoya to return.

Kyoya had left the area to get food once he became hungry. He himself had also been training in another warehouse, doing much more than breaking a single wooden box, which to him was a walk in the park. Once he made his way back, he paused by the river which shimmered in the pearly white light of the moon. Whilst he was enjoying the calm of the night, he heard the sound of a girl singing, her angelic voice echoing off of the walls in the warehouse, amplifying its beauty. Who is that? he wondered. Upon approaching the warehouse that Kiara was in, he heard the voice louder and clearer. That can't possibly be her singing, right? Kyoya stood outside the entrance of the warehouse, hiding himself so that he could listen to the rest of the song. Wow, she's got an amazing voice, I gotta give her that, he thought to himself. She seems to be done doing the thing I asked her to do. Let me check. He waited until she had stopped singing to walk in. Much to his dismay, the box remained standing just how it had been when he left.

"You still haven't managed to break it yet?" Kyoya deadpanned as he walked in, noticing Kiara lying on the floor like a child. I guess my plan of telling her I was successful on my first try didn't work, he thought.

"Stop scaring me!" Kiara yelled back, her hand placed on her chest as she had been startled by the boy's sudden appearance.

"Who's the pussy now, huh?" Kyoya mocked, earning a glare from the girl. "So you haven't broken the box. Disappointing."

"At least I scratched it!" she retorted, sitting up and pointing at the box.

"Ooo, a scratch? Let me see," Kyoya spoke mockingly as he walked towards the box to find the smallest scratch possible. "You call this a scratch?"

"Look, at least it's something," the girl huffed, crossing her arms. Kyoya picked up her bey from the floor and walked back towards her. "Get up."

"Help me up," Kiara muttered as she raised her arms in the air towards the boy. He simply looked at her with an eyebrow raised and arms crossed. "Argh, you're so useless," she whined, helping herself up. He placed the bey in her hand before walking to stand behind her, watching her as she repeatedly launched her bey at the box but still making no progress.

"Am I doing something wrong?" she asked, turning to face him.

────────────────────

the rest of chapter 4 is available on wattpad:

[comfy-whumpee]

Experiment 5

CN: lab whump. Fantasy gore/tree gore. Bystander syndrome.

The holes and gaps had scabbed over with thick bark by the time Pike chose the fifth piece he wanted from his Subject One.

 Spencer had been living at the lab for the last fortnight. It wasn’t too bad, not least because going home apparently pissed Pike off, and made their working conditions worse. They had been put on cleaning duty four days in a row and outside food and drink had been banned. It seemed his demands only grew as the project developed, but hey, they could handle it.

 They came out of the little on-site kitchen to find him already striding down the corridor. It was 7am, but he was fully dressed, dark hair slicked back, serious eyes focused straight ahead. “With me,” he said to them as he passed.

 This was really why they stayed. It meant they could be a part of things. No more showing up hours after the latest development. No more being late to the exciting ideas.

 “Patel!” Pike called as he reached the ground floor, Spencer at his heels. “The saw!”

 Spencer stumbled over the last step, catching a hand on the chrome banister. The saw? No way, after last time, really? What, was he going to take her other arm? What was the fucking point? Why couldn’t he take small samples, like she mattered?

 “Clipboard, Drew,” he snapped, and they grabbed one from the desk and quickened their step, catching up just as he pushed through the doors to the courtyard.

 Silver Birch didn’t sleep. She was always awake, always looking at the sky or watching whoever was watching her through the windows. When the doors opened, she was already turned that way, her body leaning away from her tree. She was almost completely free of it now, though she still lacked proper legs. It didn’t seem to cause her any difficulty to balance a foot away from the trunk.

 Her head was still bare. Nothing had grown to replace the stolen hair. Just like how the flower hadn’t come back.

“Take notes,” Pike ordered. “Subject One, sample R-1. Operation site at the rear of the torso, eight inch incision.” Patel arrived, delivering the saw to his hand, and Spencer gripped the clipboard tightly. Pike didn’t notice, crouching to examine the site. “Subject shows half-centimetre exterior bark coverage.”

 Spencer copied down what he said. Then they processed it. “Eight inches? Surely that’s unnecessary for a sample.”

 Pike ignored them, drawing the saw across whatever invisible line he had marked in his head.

 “Sir! Eight inches for a single sample? When you cut off her hair it didn’t grow back, surely we shouldn’t—”

 “The subject is not female, Drew,” Pike interrupted, casting her a freezing glare. “Cease your sentimentalising of its camouflage. Your role here is to develop its language capability, not treat it like a person.”

 “She’s intelligent, sir.”

 “Enough.” He turned back, making quick work of the dark, deep brown bark, and exposing again the silvery layer beneath with its pale tracery, imitating the roots that secured her underground and mapped almost identically to a human nervous system. “The imitation nervous system is unchanged for the cover grown atop it. Its purpose remains unknown.”

 He held the saw out to be taken, and it was exchanged with a wood shaver.

 “A layer of the wood will be removed to expose what is underneath.”

 He drew the blade across the smooth surface. Spencer found that they were watching the dryad’s face for pain. There was none, of course. She looked mildly displeased, but that was all.

 “Sample R-2,” Pike said, and the shaving was delicately sealed into a bag for later. “No visible change to the exterior.” But, before they could stop him, he did it again. A faint swish-scrape sound, and Pike’s impersonal voice. “Sample R-3. No change. Photography.”

 He stepped back, and one of the other technicians began taking photographs of the site before any further changes were enacted.

 This was stupid. He didn’t know what he was looking for, just like the rest of them. Spencer had read the reports, on sleepless nights between shifts in their lumpy on-site bed. The attempts to grow a new dryad had failed. They couldn’t even grow a tree sapling. They had all grown slowly or never even sprouted from their clippings. None of them had any sign of the unique root structures that Silver Birch had used.

 “What is the purpose of the imitation nervous system?” Spencer blurted, when the photographer stepped back and Pike approached. “Silver Birch? Tell us what they’re for.”

 The bald head turned, eyes fixing heavily as always. She stared at them.

 Spencer met her stare. “Tell me, please.”

 For a long moment, she didn’t reply. She barely look like she had understood the question. But then she spoke in her wispy voice. “Imitation.”

 “Imitation? Do you – need them?”

 “No.”

 Spencer’s head spun. Why map a nervous system so accurately, if it was all for decoration?

 “Do you need any of the things we took from you?”

 “Need? No.”

 Why the fuck had she wasted so much of their time with objections, if none of it was needed?  Why hadn’t she just said? Why had they spent so many nights feeling guilty?

 “Drew, notes,” Pike cut in, and Drew ignored him.

 “Why create it? Any of it?”

 Silver Birch blinked. Her eyes weren’t fucking real. She didn’t even – did she even see through them? Was there a point to meeting her gaze, or was it like Pike said, and they were as real as the pattern on a peacock feather?

 They would ask that later.

 “When change,” Silver Birch said, “you looking at me. No change, no looking at me.

 Everyone was staring, watching the confrontation, even Pike observing the two of them with interest. But Spencer couldn’t bring themself to care, not this time. They felt – stupid. Like Pike was being proven right. Like they’d been strung along by an imitation of life—

 “I am intelligent,” Silver Birch said, turning away and, for the first time, addressing someone other than Spencer or Pike. She looked out across the scientists gathered out of the woodwork for Pike’s experiment, meeting gazes with her disapproving frown. “Humans are intelligent and I am intelligent. I am sapient. I have thought. I work. I adapt. That’s intelligent.”

 The courtyard was silent. Pike was watching them. Spencer clenched sweaty fists and was about to reply, when she spoke again.

 “You didn’t treat me like a person. I am a person. When I looked like one, then you treat me like a person.” Her head turns again, and Spencer feels their heart stutter as the eyes return to them. “You. Spencer Drew. See I am a person.”

 Spencer swallowed. Silver Birch stared down at her, the bark-lined cheeks of her face severe, her eyes impossibly wide, and her expression faintly echoing Pike’s – and yet Spencer realised they liked Silver Birch more than anyone else in this fucking lab.

 They pull away and glance at Pike. He is already looking at them, eyes moving over their expression, their shirt, their clenched fists, right down to their battered work shoes. His eyes are cold and – analytical.

 He wasn’t looking at them at all. Just looking.

 Their chest shrank tightly around their heart. They turned, looking to Patel, his second in command.

 Patel didn’t look back.

 They turned further. Gregory, Miller, Petrova, none of them would meet Spencer’s eye. Some of them looked, but...

 “Drew,” Pike said, and their head flicked back to him, eyes wide. He showed no recognition of their sudden fear. “I have underestimated your work. I believe you are crucial to this research.”

 They should thank him. Or ask him why. “Crucial?” they repeat faintly.

 Pike acted as though they had not spoken. “Gregory, as we discussed.”

 Gregory stepped forwards. Spencer turned to him, and instinctively moved back when he approached. Gregory looked unbothered, grabbing their wrist and pulling their arm out. With his other hand, he snapped something around it.

 They looked down.

 A bracelet. No – an electronic cuff.

 For monitoring them.

 They turned their eyes to Pike again, holding the arm away from their body. “Sir, you can’t do this! The law—”

 “Has never been part of our work here,” Pike said flatly. “Your working conditions will not change, provided you can maintain your rationality. You are simply too valuable to leave.”

 Spencer looked to Silver Birch. They didn’t know why.

 She met their gaze. “I’m sorry,” she said.

 A hand landed on the back of Spencer’s neck and pushed. They stumbled forwards. They left Silver Birch and Pike behind as they were steered, too panicked to resist, into a small sterile room with nothing but a cot inside.

 The door closed. The door locked. How long ago had they prepared this room?

 They slumped down onto the cot and pulled their sleeve back to look again at the cuff. A black band tight around their wrist, with a small, blinking light, and a label.

 Subject Two.

[vivilove-jonsa]

Some prompts for you! Hope they aren’t too terrible! “Is… Is that my shirt?” “When you asked me to join you upstairs, this is not what I imagined.” “Shut up and hold my hand.” “Good morning! This is your 7 am wake up call.” “Why do you only call me when this happens?” “

Thank you so much for all the cool prompts @mariah-on-fire !  I decided to choose one of them although I could potentially follow this up using some of the others.  

This is modern, one-night stand (but go ahead and tell yourself it’ll be more) and I hope you like it!

**

BRING-BRRRRING!  BRING-BRRRRING!  BRING-BRRRRING!

Sansa whimpers, burrowing into the covers as her sleep-fogged brain tries to make sense of this horrible, yet vaguely familiar sound.

“Shit,” a gravelly male voice mutters beside her and suddenly a body is leaning across hers.

The fog is rapidly dispersing.  

Jon…Jon Targaryen from Corporate.  The conference and...  

Her eyes fly open.  There’s something a bit like panic fluttering in her chest now.  What did they do?!  Well, she knows what they did.  She won’t be forgetting that.  But what was she thinking?!

He lifts the receiver of the hotel phone before that awful ring sounds again.  “‘Lo?”

“Good morning!  This is your 7 am wake-up call,” she hears a chipper, wide-awake voice say on the other end.

“Yeah, thanks.”  He sets the handset back in its place before gingerly moving off of her.  “Sorry,” he says giving her a sheepish look.  

It’s sweet really and reminds her of those teasing, tasting first kisses they’d shared in the corridor while waiting for the elevator after he’d managed to ask her if she’d want to leave the hotel bar with him.  

“My phone died one time overnight when I was traveling and I missed an important meeting so I always ask for a wake-up call.”  

His voice sounds sexy this early, all gruff and raw.  It reminds her of one of his hands plunging into her copper tresses, wrapping it up and tugging, just this side of rough, as she’d moaned into his kiss while his other hand had been desperately rucking up her dress no sooner than he’d thrown the latch on the door.

“Right.”  Her voice is a croak and she wishes for water.

“You want some water?”

It’s like he read her mind.  

She nods and he scoots off the other side of the bed.  He hesitates for a second before deciding to stand as he is, buck naked and pretty fucking glorious really.  

Her eyes enjoy the view as her lips twitch into a grin touched with more than a smidge of smug joy.  For once, Sansa Stark has done something that wasn’t what was expected of her.  She dove in headfirst rather than planning it out and weighing the pros and cons.  She actively went after a man she found desirable, not submitting to one who’d been chasing her for a change, though Jon had definitely been interested.  He’d certainly not put up a fight last night. Not that she’d wanted one.  She’d just wanted a man who wanted her too with no strings attached.  

But those strings are more the norm for her and she’s not sure what to do now.  Maybe he’s not either.  He’s all shy glances and testing smiles this morning.  He’s jerked on his boxers before he passes her the glass of water.

“Did you want me to fetch some ice for that?”

“No, it’s fine like this.”

He looks over his shoulder at the little coffeemaker on the counter above the mini-fridge.  “I could brew you a cup of coffee…or tea if you prefer.”

She’s guzzling down the glass and shakes her head.  “No, this is all I want right now.”

“So…”  He’s biting at his lip and she catches his eyes darting down to the covers that are covering her a time or two.  “That was my wake-up call.”  

“It was,” she nods.  

“I don’t really want to go anywhere,” he admits with a very tempting grin.

His words cause another flutter in her chest, this one less panicky and more…something.  “Me, either. But I guess you need to get ready and I do, too.”

“Yeah, we’ve got that financial growth and development meeting with…”  

“The one your father’s hosting.”

He groans and rubs his eyes.  It’s kind of boyish in a way.  It’s kind of adorable.  “Yeah, him.”

He’s not fan of the CEO who is also his father.  She’d heard that rumor even in her little satellite office on the other side of the city.  This four-day conference which she’d been so thrilled to attend initially has opened her eyes as to why Jon might feel that way. She’s no longer a fan of the big boss either.  

“Did you want to shower?” he asks next, nodding towards the bathroom.

“No.  Well, I do but all my stuff is in my room.”  

Her room which is two floors below this one.  She grimaces.  It’s 7am and there’ll be people stirring.  People from the conference maybe.  People who are just other guests at the hotel.  Her little black dress and heels aren’t exactly subtle.  

All her earlier smug joy has dried up at the thought of being spotted, of whispers following her for the rest of the week about Sansa Stark chasing after the CEO’s son, whispers that will follow her back to work the following Monday and maybe always.

“Hey.”

“Yeah?”

He sits down on the edge of the bed, his mischievous roaming eyes from earlier replaced by sincere concern.  “What do you need?”

She realizes he’s been watching her.  “I just need a dose of courage, I guess,” she answers, putting on a brave smile.

He nods.  “Want me to walk you to your room?”

“No, I’m a big girl but…”  She snickers. “Sorry.  I’ve never done this before.”

“I’m no expert at it, not at all,” he shrugs.  “After you’ve showered, would you want to have breakfast with me? They’ll be serving it downstairs and…I’d really like to have breakfast with you, Sansa.”

What does she say?  And what will people think?  

She realizes she doesn’t care.  She likes him and he likes her and it’s just breakfast.  She can worry about this thing and their day and the world beyond that later.  

“Yeah, I’d like that, Jon.”  

[momo-de-avis]

I am absolutely at my wit's end.

Its currently past 7AM. Its the second night in a row I cannot sleep. The second night in a row I twist and turn for two hours and just will not sleep.

I am so tired. I am exhausted at this point. I drag myself across the house all day long, every day, barely able to concentrate in anything. At one point, it hurts to keep my eyes open. I've been having headaches for weeks because I have not slept a proper night in months. I spend the whole day yawning. I can barely stand on my feet. I drag on and do half of what I'm supposed to do because I just can't function. And then my head hits the pillow and I will. Not. Sleep.

I've dead ass tried everything. Sleeping pills kind worked for a very short while, and then they went back to what they always did: actually kept me awake all night. I've tried relaxing music of all sorts, it doesn't work. I tried a million different things in therapy, nothing works.

At this point I just fully believe I am wired to not sleep. I very rarely sleep any more than 6h a night. I used to be a heavy sleeper like, you could play the drums near me and I would not wake up, but for the last fifteen years or so, I've become the lightest sleeper. Everything wakes me up.

It adds to this that there's just something fucking wrong with me that I cannot explain. Occasionally (no criteria to this occasion), I get these bouts of heat. My ears feel like they're on fire. If I touch them, it feels like I'm pressing sandpaper against them. My skin turns bright red and it genuinely feels like someone is pressing hot coals against my ears. It takes my sleep away. I have to get up and go to the bathroom to literally soak myself in cold water every five minutes because I cannot stand it. It is painful and the most uncomfortable thing I've ever felt. Because the slightest touch to my ears (and I mean the slightest) will feel like sandpaper that was set on fire, I can't sleep on my side. I have to sleep on my back, which is the most uncomfortable position for me. I NEVER fall asleep on my back. But it is genuinely painful to just lay my head on the side. Usually, as night progresses it only gets worse. It feels like my whole fucking face is on fire and it's starting in my ears. It doesn't go away. I don't even know why the fuck it's here. I've been having this since I can remember, ever since a child, and there was never a solution. In fact, despite the fact that it literally didn't let me sleep, no one even saw it as a problem. Bf has suggested sleeping slightly sitting instead of totally lying because he suspects it might be a blood circulation problem and you know what, he might be right, who fucking knows anymore.

"Try taking naps during the day, Ana" you say, sensible person. I would, of my body resorted to sleeping during the day. It doesn't. Like I said, I am literally exhausted all the time. I might as well be at the plight of fatigue. I will lie down for a nap, close my eyes, and will not sleep. I mean, yeah, I rest a little, I guess, but I never actually fall asleep. I just lie down quietly with my eyes closed, fully aware of my surroundings, of everything happening around me.

I swear to fucking god I feel in my bones that the total amount of time I spent sleeping in my life is half of what I need. I genuinely, wholeheartedly, feel like I am going to fucking die of this shit one day, but I just don't know what else to fucking do. It's funny cause shit like light isn't even a problem, though sound might be. Whatever the fûck is wrong with me, I actually used to sleep, though I was pretty unregulated and have always been, but I'm starting to pick on that this might just be the result of some 12 years living with people who completely tore my sleep apart.

For a month now I've been stumbling out of bed at 7AM with tears of rage in my eyes cause I feel so exhausted I just. Want. To fucking sleep. And I can't.

I'm sorry, I'm just really at my limit here

[msjr0119]

We Belong

Part 8

Evangeline Bruley returns to Cordonia to take over her families Duchy. She was betrothed to the now King, however he is engaged to Duchess Riley but still has lingering feelings towards his first love. What will happen during her time back in Cordonia?

Just using combined tag list- if you want to be removed just let me know 😊

@pedudley @kacie-0156 @loveellamae @annekebbphotography @burnsoslow @ladyangel70 @kingliam2019 @bbrandy2002 @butindeed @bascmve01 @drakewalker04 @captain-kingliamsqueen @duchessemersynwalker @insideamirage @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld @kozabaji @texaskitten30 @ibldw-main @kimmiedoo5 @nikkis1983 @gnatbrain @walker7519 @lodberg @cmestrella @hopefulmoonobject @addictedtodrakefanfic @angi15h @liamxs-world @rafasgirl23415 @notoriouscs @yukinagato2012 @dcbbw @qammh-blog @nz1091 @cordonianroyalty @custaroonie @seriouslybadchoices @rainbowsinthestorm @princess-geek @jared2612 @desiree---1986 @gardeningourmet @twinkle-320 @queenjilian @forthebrokenheartedthings-blog @princessleac1 @scarletreesex

Warnings: Swearing, alcohol abuse, mention of murder, potential murder. Long chapter- sorry! There’s lots of skipping time...

*****

“Oh really Bast. Care to explain why I was the reasoning behind my husbands death?” Denial had set in, as it had done all these years- providing a confident smirk she couldn’t wait for the guard to elaborate on his assumption.

“Your problem with alcohol, Bi. He was too worried about you and your children’s welfare that he wasn’t concentrating that day... he failed the royal family...” Letting out a sinister laugh, Bastien looked at her frustratedly- he knew the real Bianca and this wasn’t her. When he had first met her, she welcomed everyone into her family home- she mothered everyone, she put her family as number one priority.

“Fuck the royal family. They wouldn’t give him time off, that’s why he died...he was tired... I don’t see how it was my fault. Then the Bruleys stole my kids off me...” Knowing whatever he said, she was going to respond with denial- but he needed to defend the people that were there when she wasn’t even if it took him the rest of his life for it to sink in.

“They did no such thing! They were good people who looked after your children along with the King and Queen. All because you cared more about the booze. Now I will escort you to a spare room. Then you will go home to Texas.”

“I’m here for the wedding, and to see my children and my grandson.”

“You have never cared about them. So what is the real reason as to why you are here?” To bring down the crown, and Evangeline. I’m not the only one- let’s hope your tired and not concentrating during this important event, head guard.

*****

Evie began to stir, dreaming about her passionate night with Drake- she didn’t want to wake up. Feeling content with her life at the moment, in her dreams and thoughts she regretted wasting all these years without Drake as they are now. Wondering what their future held, could they be happy like all their friends are? Was Toby cheating on her fate? Was him and Kiara not working through their relationship fate? Was all of Olivia’s meddling fate? The answer to all those questions were, yes- and now she couldn’t wait to finally settle down. The strong scent of whiskey surrounded her waking her up from her slumber, blinking as she checked her phone she realised that it was only 7am. Too early for drinking, seriously Drake?Turning around there was no sign of Drake- suddenly she was alert and awake, wondering where he was and where the sudden smell of whiskey had vanished to. Putting the satin babydoll dress on, she took some painkillers before searching for Drake.

“Hey, what are you doing out of bed?” Facing away from her, he could sense her presence as soon as she entered the kitchen- pouring her a coffee, he eventually turned around giving her the newly brewed drink and a kiss on the cheek.

“I wondered where you was. I smelt whiskey...” But it’s not you. Am I dreaming about whiskey now?

“Must be your imagination. I know Olivia thinks that I’m an alcoholic but I know it’s too early to have a drink. Although I feel drunk around you when you are wearing that...” Damn these painkillers must be strong, imagining whiskey. She was snapped out of her thoughts as Drake lifted her up on to the table.

“Can your imagination predict what I’m about to do to you Duchess?”

*****

Liam woke up debating what to do about Bianca, internal thoughts battled against each other- not knowing which was the right path to follow. There was a slight bit of jealously that his friend was with his childhood sweetheart, but he cared for Drake- and didn’t want to ruin his happiness or friendship. Besides he had a beautiful fiancée and child on its way.

“Li?”

“Sorry, did I disturb you?”

“No... okay - yes you did. You’ve been fidgety all night. Is it because of Tariq’s and Neville’s funerals next week or because of Drakes mom?”

“Both. Especially Bianca. I can’t tell Drake and Savannah that she’s here. But I can’t send her away whilst she’s like this.” Liam wrapped his arm around Riley, hoping that she could help him decide on what to do. Drake had briefly informed her about his relationship with his family- how she ran away when life got tough, then how Savannah did the same. But he failed to mention to her that his mother was an alcoholic- Riley now realised that it was probably to do with embarrassment, or to protect himself and Savannah.

“How long has she been like this? Did it start when Jackson died?”

“No. I think we was about ten when she became dependent on the alcohol. Her sister was on the verge of losing their ranch, she couldn’t cope with Jackson working long hours. Two days before he passed away, she showed herself up in front of Evie’s parents- they took Drake and Savannah in for the night. I don’t know what to do Ri. Do I tell them or not?” In the back of her mind she believed that he should inform them of their mothers impromptu visit- especially to warn them. But on the other hand would that warning cause trouble, she didn’t want her to become a burden on everyone especially Drake. She was thinking about why people had left her to continue struggling with the addiction and why no one had convinced her to attempt counselling and rehab.

“When’s Savannah and Bertrand back?”

“They are coming back for the wedding. I’m not sure the exact date, as far as I’m aware they are returning the night before. She seems to only show up back here when it’s a special occasion.” Hearing a knock on the door, Liam immediately shot out of bed. Ready to berate whoever it was.

“Sir? Sorry to disturb you so early. I have some bad news.”

“Is it Bianca? What has she done now?”

“No, she’s sleeping. It’s your father. He passed away in the night. I’m so sorry, Liam.”

*****

The King father’s funeral took place a few days after his death- the whole country were in silence, mourning their “beloved” ex monarch. Shock was also a common expression throughout the country- the only people that was aware of his illness was his family, but they believed he had a longer lifespan- so were all also shocked at the news. Liam and Leo supported their step mother throughout the ceremony, she explained how Constantine wasn’t thrilled about Riley being his choice- but he would have loved to be at the wedding and support them.

Tariq’s and Neville’s funerals were quick and short. Many people providing crocodile tears- the two men were despised within court, but the majority of people just attended out of curiosity. Hoping that the truth regarding their deaths would come alight. Liam provided a speech, not wanting to criticise the deceased instead turning negative factors about their lives into positive ones. Many ‘mourners’ now expressed the same expression- grimace but deep down were relieved.

*****

Liam and Riley had decided to postpone their wedding due to all the deaths that had unexpectedly occurred- it was now taking place two months later than its original date. It was a hard decision to make, especially as Riley was beginning to grow a slight baby bump. They were due to go for her first scan today, if everything was adequate with the baby’s health- they had decided to announce it at their wedding rehearsal dinner that was taking place later that night.

“Your majesty, Duchess Riley. Are you both ready to see your baby?” They both nodded, both excited but also nervous at the same time. Liam had believed that when he was younger that this would have been him and Evie. Now it was reality with Riley, his fiancée- he understood that fate had a way of changing destiny, in a positive way. He was finally getting the family that he had always dreamt of- with everything that had happened the last few weeks, this was now something positive to look forward to, not only for himself and Riley but also for Cordonia. Holding her hand, he slowly began to lose his usual stoic expression- worrying about this, as most new parents would do.

“Are you okay?” Riley asked cupping his cheek, knowing that he wasn’t as his whole body was tense.

“Yes love. I love you both. I’m just nervous.”

“We love you too daddy.” Hearing her say this made it finally sink in- he was going to be a father.

Placing the gel onto her stomach, Riley flinched at the sudden coldness even though she had a pre warning. After a while, they heard noises escape the machine- both their eyes formed tears as they looked at their child for the first time.

“The baby is fine, all measuring correctly. Is there anything you’d like to ask?”

“No.” They said in unison, both jaws nearly hitting the ground- disbelief still surrounding their minds that they had created this little miracle.

“I love you my Queen, are you ready to go back. We can then announce to everyone our news.” Looking at the photo, she traced her fingers along it.

“Yes, lets hope our closest friends can act surprised.”

*****

Everyone arrived at the rehearsal dinner, they had decided to add an American tradition for the Queen to be. The guests all congratulated the happy couple, all looking forward for the nuptials that were taking place the next day.

“Drakey!” Bianca ran up to her son, he wasn’t sure how to react. The anger towards her that lingered every day since his childhood. The confusion as to why she was here. The frustration that she was drunk as always. Placing his arm around Evie he whispered in her ear, I’ll see you in a bit- I need to sort her out. Evie was hesitant about leaving him, knowing how she ruined his childhood as well as Savannah’s- but eventually agreed. Kissing her on the cheek, he had hoped that his mother’s visit was just a flying visit and that she would become non existent again.

“What are you doing here?” For the first time in a couple months- his infamous scowl had returned.

“No kiss for me, but a kiss for the little bitch who’s parents tried ruin your life- her parents who tried to take you and your sister away from me.”

“They did no such thing.”

“Oh please tell me you and Evangeline aren’t....”

“What if we were? It’s none of your business. I love her, Mom. Now answer my question. Why are you here?”

“I’m here for Liam’s wedding obviously. You can’t love her. Would you love her if your father didn’t stop the arrangement?”

“Im actually surprised you’ve turned up, oh silly me- you only come back for special occasions that provide a free bar. I loved her when she was in that arrangement. I am going to spend time with the woman that I love, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t follow me.”

“Oh Drake, let me in to a little secret.... I killed Michaela and Alexander. Alcohol and driving doesn’t mix. I paid someone to cover my tracks. Why do you think I insisted that you came to Texas when the was funeral taking place? Who do you think started those rumours off about the Bruleys- the rumours that turned everyone against them. I’m not leaving Cordonia- it would be a shame for anything to happen to poor little Evie. Goodnight son, I’ll see you at the wedding.”

Evie had been watching the interaction between Drake and Bianca from a distance- noticing how his expressions were originally anger but confident, then how it turned into shock.

“Hey handsome.” Fuck, I need to protect her.

“Evie I can’t be with you... I’m so sorry.” Evie’s eyes widened, immediately searching for Maxwell- assuming that he would be stood in the corner laughing at this practical joke. Trying to convince herself that this was something Maxwell would do for entertainment. There was no other explanation as to why their relationship should abruptly end.

“Excuse me?” Were the only words she managed to express, as Drake looked at her with sorrow in his eyes.

“My mom has some vendetta against you. I can’t ....”

“Yeah I heard you Drake. You can’t be with me...” Not realising how loud she was, everyone turned their heads towards the two of them. “How could you humiliate me like this? What was I Drake? Just a fuck? To get back at Liam for stealing the girl you love?”

“No. I love you. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“Too late.” Fighting the tears back was proving a difficult task, hoping that this conversation wasn’t ruining the night for her friends. Remaining in silence, she couldn’t comprehend what was happening- Drake tried to comfort her, but she pushed him away.

“Is everything okay?” Bianca asked as she smirked at Evie, before standing next to Drake placing her hand on his shoulder. Grimacing at his Mom, he brushed her away from him- not wanting to be anywhere near her.

“The best mother and actress award goes to Bianca Walker. See ya around Drake.” Regretting what he had done, he was undecided whether to follow her or not. Deciding how to grovel for forgiveness. Bianca watched Evie storm out of the room, with Olivia following her- she knew Nevrakis wouldn’t be an issue. Her focus was to brainwash her son against them all. Maybe get him on her side to accomplish her vengeance.

“Don’t worry about her. All these nobles care about are themselves. Come back to Texas with me darling. Where you belong.”

“You got what you wanted Mom. Why couldn’t you die instead of dad? I hate you. You are not my mom anymore, goodbye Bianca- enjoy the flight back to Texas on your own.”

*****

The day after the disastrous rehearsal dinner was the wedding of the century, all of Cordonia was relieved that this day had finally arrived.

Leo and Drake went up to Liam’s study, both already suited and booted.

“Don’t you both look dashing. Are you both trying to upstage me?”

“Well I did that a long time ago little brother, but I’ll let you have the spotlight today. Just this once though- I’m the more handsome brother.” Leo knew Liam was nervous, so decided to keep the upbeat attitude rather than provide a heart to heart conversation.

“Drake? Are you okay?” Liam hadn’t heard from neither Drake nor Evie after the commotion that Bianca had caused- he even had doubts that the two of them would even turn up.

“Yeah Li. It’s your wedding day, it should be me asking you that.”

“You need to fix things with Evie, I don’t know what you was thinking. All I wanted my whole life was for her to love me back, you had that and you let her go.” Drake felt guilty, knowing that he had a diamond - a diamond who the king, his friend had pined for all those years- and he let her go in an instant.

“Li, my mom hates her.. I don’t want my mom’s vendetta to cause trouble between us. You don’t know what she’s capable of. Could you imagine if we got married or had children... my mom would destroy us. So I’m saving her and myself from the heartache now.”

“No offence Walker but is your mother in this relationship too? No she isn’t.”

“Leo’s right. She will going back to Texas, and who knows when you’ll see her again. I still don’t understand why she’s here- we didn’t invite her to the wedding.”

“You didn’t?”

“No. Listen, I’m sure Evie will have calmed down- at the reception, try and talk to her. Ask her for a dance. Myself and Riley won’t be offended if you both sneak off.....” Straightening his tie, he closed his eyes. It’s time. “I think I’m ready. Leo are you ready to marry me?” Leo nodded, the three men had a scotch before making their way to the cathedral.

****

Arriving at the cathedral with Olivia, Evie was in a trance- not really wanting to attend, not wanting to see Bianca again.

“Are you okay? Fuck Bianca, Drake is a jerk- but he does love you and you love him. Just talk to him now you’ve calmed down.” I’m not wasting anymore time watching you cry, I sacrificed my love life last night to comfort you.

“I feel really sick. I don’t want to be here. I’ll listen to their vows and then I’ll leave. I’m sure they won’t mind.... Liv pass me your bag quick!” Olivia passed her best friend the bag, not really understanding why- until she heard Evie use it as a sick bag.

“For fuck sake Evie, it’s Prada!”

“I’m sorry, I’m just really nervous. I don’t want to see him.”

“Are you sure it’s nerves? It could be a stomach bug, or alcohol poisoning after the amount you consumed yesterday. I better give the bag to Riley in case she wants to use it too...”

“It’s nerves. Trust me.”

Walking down the aisle the two duchesses took a seat, Olivia smiled at Liam and Drake whilst Evie stared off into space.

“Look at you two, don’t you both look lovely.”

“Fuck off!”

“That’s no way to talk to people Duchess Evangeline.”

“I can talk to you however I want Mrs Walker. Excuse me I’m going to be sick.”

“What is her issue?” Bianca asked Olivia, in an innocent tone of voice.

“You are. You are everyone’s issue. I’m surprised you’re not stumbling around yet. Or is it because you don’t want to make a scene in front of the press?”

“Duchess Olivia, I can behave when I need to. Besides my daughter and grandson are on their way- I don’t want Bartie to inhale my alcohol breathe.”

“Oh but it was okay for Drake and Savannah when they were kids to inhale it. Go away Bianca no one wants you here.”

****

Leo made the ceremony entertaining, with laughter echoing throughout the cathedral- the emotions soon changed the moment Liam and Riley said their vows to each other. There was tears throughout the cathedral, it truly was a fairytale love story.

“What’s up Evie? You’re pretty emotional- that could have been you.” Bianca asked as she lent forward, intentionally ready to cause trouble yet again.

“That would have never been me.”

“No you just prefer Dukes who cheat on you. Shame really, the Bruley name would have disappeared in a flash if you stayed in London and married him. Like your parents disappeared, they thought they could steal my children off me.”

“Don’t talk about my parents. They did a lot when you was absent along with Constantine, Regina and Bastien.”

“Bianca shut the fuck up because I’m going to do it for you if not. Leave my best friend alone.” Before Bianca could respond, Savannah squeezed in next to her mom after overhearing the conversation.

“Mom, you’re embarrassing me. Everyone helped myself and Drake- you need to make it up to these people. And please get some help.” Evie turned around, shocked that savannah had defended her, providing a half hearted smile- she turned back towards the happy couple.

“You ready to go?” Olivia whispered, with a smirk- as she pulled out the hip flask.

“I’m a Duchess, get me out of here- get me to the champagne that’s at the end of the bridge.”

****

Throughout the reception, everyone mingled with each other- The congratulations continued for the happy couple. Drake stood in a corner, his eyes focused on Evie- admiring her beauty, his heart just wanted to take her away from all of this. Liam had noticed what Drake had been doing ever since they arrived- giving his friend a nudge, he knew what to do. Feeling like he had to drag his feet forward, it was as if a magnet was pulling him away from her.

“Duchess Evangeline, may I have this dance?” Drake wasn’t aware about how many whiskeys he had consumed to pluck up the courage to speak to her.

“Sir Walker, thank you. But I have to decline. I promised a dance to Lord Maxwell.”

“He’s dancing with Hana.”

“I meant Leo.”

“He’s with Penelope.” Fuck.

“Rashad. This champagne has gone straight to my head. Rashad... I meant him.” Drake looked over towards Rashad, who was whispering into Kiara’s ear before leading her on to the balcony- Evie noticed too, knowing there were no other options apart from Toby and the mysterious man stood with him. But she wasn’t going to go down that route.

“Evie, please. I know my mom has caused trouble, I want to rectify it. I wasn’t thinking straight. I love you. I can see a future with you. Hate me all you want, I deserve it. I just want you to know that I love you, and I’ll carry on fighting for you. Even if it takes me another ten years....”

“Evie! Dance off?” Maxwell shouted as he bounced towards the two.

“Sure Maxi. See ya Drake.” Max jumped up and down like an excited puppy, Drakes heart sunk watching the Lord place a smile across her face. He was extremely disappointed that she couldn’t provide a bit of an inkling that she still cared for him.

“Give her time Drake, she’s not feeling well. She’s been sick three times today- once in my Prada bag, she’s lucky she’s still walking.” Drake wondered why she would be sick, why she was in fact still walking if anyone else had done that they’d be planning their funeral. Leaving Olivia, he went back over towards Liam- knowing full well he had failed Evie and was potentially going to get a lecture off of his best friend for not trying hard enough.

Evie had finished her dance with Maxwell, and noticed Bianca pestering the Queen. Making her way over, she grabbed another glass of champagne- hoping it would blank Bianca out of her mind- luckily for her Bianca created a distance.

“Congratulations Riley. Your vows were beautiful.”

“Thank you Evie. I’m glad you came.”

The two women spoke comfortably in other’s company, with Bianca lurking in the shadows. Evie informed Riley about Liam’s childhood- the times they shared together with the rest of their friends, all the embarrassing memories of Liam. Then the conversation turned into the future heir, Riley showed Evie the photo of the scan that they had. “Aw. Riley, I’m so happy for the two of you. I’m going to spoil him or her.”

“Myself and Liam were talking last night... I’m sure he won’t mind me telling you. But we wanted to ask you to be godmother. You’ve had my back, protected the baby before it’s even born.” Evie remained silent, not knowing how to respond at first. Wondering what people would think about her being her ex’s child’s godmother.

“Id love to be its godmother. Thank you so much, Auntie Evie can’t wait to meet you little one.” Uncontrollably crying, she didn’t know what had come over her- maybe it was just the reason as to why they chose her out of everyone.

“I’m glad. I didn’t think you’d get this emotional though.. I’m the pregnant one.”

Before Evie could respond, Bianca knocked into Riley sending her straight to the floor- her head narrowly missing the vase that stood next to them.

“Oops! Did I hurt you, your Majesty.”

****

“Riley! Are you okay?” Evie helped the Queen to stand before providing Bianca with dagger eyes.

“Yeah. I’m fine.”

“Do you want me to get Liam for you?”

“Do you want me to get Liam for you... because I’m little miss perfect... why do you care about her?”

“Bianca shut the fuck up! I’m caring about my godchild too!”

“I’m glad my son humiliated you... he deserves better than you. You would put everyone first before him- are you jealous that she achieved the crown and not you. You’re abnormal Evangeline.”

“Drake deserves a better mother. I think you should leave. You wasn’t even invited.” Riley defended Evie, knowing that the woman had got under her skin.

“Trust me Evie, my little stumble with the Queen was nothing... I’m not going anywhere...”

Evie snatched the drink out of Biancas hand, if it was anyone else she would potentially have empathy towards them- try and help them battle their demons. But not Bianca Walker, the woman who for over a decade had caused trouble due to her alcoholism.

“What the hell do you think your doing?”

“You’ve had enough, and you are going to kill yourself.” Beginning to shake, Bianca watched Evie pour the liquid in the nearest plant pot. Anger began to build up, how dare she- she thought in her head on repeat. Seeing the man walk towards her- she knew his intentions, she was involved as well. Taking her opportunity, the original plan had changed- Bianca was after vengeance, not only on the crown but on the last remaining Bruley.

“How dare you humiliate me?” Pulling Evie’s hair, she dropped the glass- before being forcefully pushed into the man. Evie, this wasn’t what was supposed to happen. I was just needed to threaten the Queen with the knife not cause harm.

“EVIE!” The ballroom suddenly went silent, hearing the Queens voice. Liam and Drake immediately witnessed Evie fall to the ground.

“Bastien get the medics now!”

“Mom- Bianca what happened? Who the fuck are you?”

“Duke Tobias... he... he... I couldn’t stop him Drake... he came over to Evie and just stabbed her... for no reason.” Bianca smirked discreetly as Toby removed his balaclava- horror written all over his face.

“Evie, I didn’t mean to... she fell into me... your mother.... id never hurt her... I love her...”

“What happened?” Liam asked Riley as she stood shaking, whilst watching the guards remove Toby from the situation.

“She fell into me before- Evie defended me.... again...she was horrible to Evie....so she took the wine off her. Next minute he’s there with a knife, and Evie was pushed into him by Bianca. I thought you had security scrutinising the palace Liam! What if that was for me? Or you?”

“Bastien, take Mrs Walker to cells too! And get my Queen to safety. That’s your kings orders.” Bastien nodded, feeling like he had failed everyone- looking at Evie laying in a puddle of blood, he then focused his gaze onto Drake who was applying pressure to wound whilst cradling her.

“You better hope she survives Walker!”

“I know Liv, this is all my fault... and you’re gonna stab me for hurting her... I already know.”

“Well yes... but if she dies... the Bruleys wrote in their will that you will become heir to their Duchy.” What the fuck? “Savannah can’t do it because she’s soon going to be Duchess of Ramsford. I know you’re not into all this court shit- but you better get praying now.”

“Liv shut the fuck up! If you’re not going to help go away!” Looking at her friend, she tried to hold the tears back. Ready to kill Bianca and Toby herself. Leaving the crime scene, she assisted the majority of the guests outside to give Evie some privacy.

“Evie you can’t leave me, one reason- I don’t really want to be a Duke... unless I marry you. Two, I’m sorry for trying to protect you and finishing us. I love you so much... I’m a dickhead for letting you go. Please don’t leave me... I love you.”

Evie it’s time.

Mother?

My darling daughter, it’s time to come home to us. We’ve missed you. We love you.

Father? Both smiling softly at her, they held their hands out in the distance.

I’ve missed you both so much. I love you both.

“Evie get that stubborn ass up. You’re a fighter! I can’t cope with Walker crying. I’m beginning to cry- and I don’t cry. Please...you’re my best friend.”

It’s time. Come with us. We will be together again- as a family.

I’m sorry if I’ve disappointed you.

You haven’t, you’re a fantastic caring friend to everyone. But it’s time to let go.

“Evie, come on. Wake up. Who’s going to cry over titanic with me? Come back jack. Come back Evie.”

I can’t leave my friends.

You will be reunited with them when their time comes. You saved Cordonias Queen and the heir.

I don’t know how much more I can fight. I’m going to be a godmother. I can’t fail it already.

“Evie, thank you for saving my wife and child- but you are going to survive this. We all love you. We need you to fight.”

Liam’s right, you need to fight.

“Walker?”

“She’s just said Walker... Drake talk to her again.” Olivia said as she dragged him down towards Evie’s body.

I’m surprised you didn’t call me Sir. You’re a fighter Evie Bruley. I love your parents, but they are incorrect. It’s not time.

I’ve got nothing left, I may as well give up.

You’ve got your friends. You have my son, Drake.

“Where are the fucking paramedics? Evie, I’ve known that I’ve loved you since I was probably about thirteen. I waited years to have you in my arms. You and I have a great future. Just us. I fucked up, please forgive me. Maybe in time we can have a little Gracie and a little Tommy. You can’t give up, I’m not leaving you...”

Drake doesn’t think, he was protecting you from my wife. She hates your family because you all looked after him and Sav when I passed. He gave you up out of love. I saw you both at my cabin, the whiskey you smelt was me, the door suddenly opening was me, the cold breeze after you two- you know what- that was me. Myself and your parents are always watching over you all.

He should have fought for me, not given up - even if Bianca is forever causing trouble.

“Your majesty, the paramedics are here. I’ll escort everyone into the back room. Who’s going with her?”

“Drake.” They all said in unison.

It’s time Evie. If you decide its time, we will wait for your spirit to leave. If not, we are so proud of you- keep making us proud. We love you.

Evangeline, don’t give up. I’ll keep an eye over you, my son, my daughter and my grandchildren.

Grandchildren?

Yes. My grandchildren. Bartie and.......

[atragedycalledmom]

Shut the fuck up and let me sleep!!

Along with the rest of the troubles, the most pissing off one now is that everyone have taken a sudden interest in how I sleep. And all I want to say is a big Fuck You.

Since the time that I got into a relationship, my sleep has gone from bad to worse. Before, I slept when I needed it and refresh. Sure I’d be up all night and wake up late, but every damn kid does that. The day I welcomed a person into my life, my sleep was lesser in my control. We’d fight if I dozed off in a convo, I’d adjust my time to meet his always, and an endless list of how I slowly lost control over more than just my sleep. One time I nearly killed myself because wanting some sleep was so damn offensive.

Married to the same person, fast forward to a time 2 kids later. Every dot of a chance I had of reclaiming control over my sleep - I stripped myself of it when I had kids. So now I try to make sure I get a lil decent sleep when I can. I find it hard to fall asleep while being squeezed out to a corner of the bed with my blanket getting pulled from me every darn second. I tried sleeping on a tiny mattress on the ground so I could sleep better and just as I’m falling asleep, I have a kid shrieking for me and I have to get me ass back on the bed and squeeze in. At 4-5 am my body gives up and starts to fall asleep however and wherever. 6-7am the hubs gets ready to go to work, sometimes wakes the kids up as he does - resulting in a torturous day for me - otherwise 7am to 11am is the best sleep I’ll get all day. Once the kids are up, its feed-clean-entertain-feed-clean-entertain-feed-clean-bedtime. If both the kids took an afternoon nap, I could catch some sleep in the middle. But they don’t. Even if there’s one awake, I’m their only entertainer around.

Now this household has many people. Let’s talk about how everyone sleeps:

Hubs-falls asleep by midnight, takes most of the bed and blanket, sleeps like a rock until it’s time to wake up and go. At least 6 hours of quality sleep. I could do with 6 hours of sleep if I had that kind of quality too.

Dad-in-law sleeps whenever the hell he wants. Got the whole place to himself. Wakes up drops his kids to school at 7? Gets home and sleeps till 12pm something. Gets the kids from school by 2, eats lunch and then another hour or two long nap. Wakes up watches TV, nothing interesting=another nap. Then rest of the night to sleep at will. Yet he won’t stop telling me when and how I should sleep. Yes, his kids - twin girls aged 7. He also said “you should wake up early and get a 30 min nap after lunch or else you’ll get fat!! Particularly get fatter if you sleep in the morning!!”

Mom-in-law wakes up and gets the kids ready for school around 7 and then goes back to sleep till 10:30-11. Wakes up and cooks and goes to work. Works till late so her sleeping till 10 is justified. But obviously stay-at-home-mum isn’t considered working is it? Or maybe everyone would shut the fuck about my sleep.

Sister-in-law on work days is up early (2 days a week)- otherwise its 2pm. No one dares to say a word.

Brother-in-law on work days is out of bed by 4pm and on off days by 6pm. No one dares to say a damn thing.

So why me? Because I’m an outsider? Because I’m just home all day with kids? I have to now beg for people to be considerate?

All I want is to sleep when I can. So I will sleep when I can. Cause none of them will last a damn day in my life if they didn’t get sleep. So here is a big damn FUCK YOU.

[skyechaser]

Bumbleby: The Musical 2/??

She did her best to go unnoticed and yet she was seen She did her best to be the star and and yet she found something better.

This idea has been on my mind FOREVER and I finally decided to publish it. This is what the name implies: a Bumbleby story with songs. Most will be from musicals with some degree of adjustment to match the story. I hope you enjoy.

…………….

Blake woke up on saturday unsure of what had actually transpired the day before. There was a book on her nightstand: The Tales of the Fourth Moon I. That could only mean one thing: she had actually gone to the mall with Yang, had the time of her life and gotten a brand new book. The black haired girl could feel her face getting increasingly hot. What was it with that rambunctious blonde that made her feel so weird? She had made the resolution not to get close to anyone. She couldn’t let the get involved with hee. And yet with Yang...

“Are you awake?” a voice made its way to her ears. The question, though it seemed simple and direct, made her think. Was she actually awake? “Blaaaaake” the voice growled.

“Yes, Illya, I am awake” she replied, laughing a bit. “You’re such a kid”

“Well yeah, kinda” her best friend replied. They had met back home, at Menagerie, and had become quick friends even though Blake was a year older. Still, Illya was the most mature of the pair in most occasions. They shared many interests and had actually enrolled together in the… No, Blake told herself, don’t remember those days. She took a deep breath. You are in Patch, in Vale. You are safe.

“Why are you awake this early?” she asked once she had calmed down, rolling in her bed to look at Illya. She was so thankful that her parents were willing to take her in when she left Menagerie. They had actually become like her second family and made the transition so much easier.

“I have soccer practice” Illya answered “Do you recall I made the team?”

“Yes I do” the black haired girl replied with a groan “But what does that have to do with me?”

“Drive me there. I don’t want to walk” Illya grinned into her words, making the face she always did when she was asking for a favor. The more outrageous the situation the happier she’d try to seem.

“It's saturday” Blake said with a serious face “7am on a saturday”

“Pretty please?”

“You are so lucky that you happen to be my best friend” the black haired girl muttered as she raised herself from the bed and walked towards her closet to get a change of clothes. She couldn’t see how Illya’s face had changed its expression.

“Yeah, I am” the redhead whispered, too soft for Blake to actually listen.

There’s a fine, fine line (Avenue Q)

[ILLYA] There's a fine, fine line between a lover and a friend There's a fine, fine line between what i would wish and what is And you’ll never know what I have inside and I have hidden for so long There's a fine, fine line between love And a waste of time

There's a fine, fine line between a lover and a friend There's a fine, fine line between “I love you” and “being In love”. I guess if someone doesn't love you back it isn't such a crime But there's a fine, fine line between love And a waste of your time

And I know that you’ll never love me back like I do I don't think that you even know what you're missing out For my own sanity, I've tried to close the door And walk away

There's a fine, fine line between together and not And there's a fine, fine line between what you wanted and what you got So I’ll keep my feelings to myself so I don’t ruin what we have. There's a fine, fine line between love And a waste of time

"So… Are you coming or what?" Blake yelled from the bathroom.

"Rising up!" Illya stood up with a smile. This was good enough.

…………….

“Get out of the car, Illya” Blake asked nicely as her friend refused to leave the vehicle.

“Do I like soccer enough to get to school early every saturday to train?” Illya replied as if she hadn’t heard the other girl talking

“Illya, you made me drive you here. You are going to practice so get out of the car” she said, almost in a growl. She hated mornings. She always had. She was more of a night person. She liked reading and silence, both things that are better done in the later hours of the day. Being awake this early on a saturday was going to ruin her circadian rhythm.

“Fine" the redhead answered as she got off the car “Thank you for the ride, Blake. Seriously” she smiled. It was hard to be mad a Illya. Blake loved her quite a lot for she was the closest thing she had to a sibling.

“You are welcome… But don’t get used to it”

“I already have so we have deal bye” Illya said as she ran towards the field, giving the other girl no time to answer. Blake rolled her eyes and sighted. She was about to drive away when she saw Yang and the world stopped moving. She was training with the lacrosse team not too far from she was parked. It surprised her that the blonde hadn’t mentioned being on the team during their afternoon together at the mall. Yang had told her about her younger sister Ruby and their dog Zwei. She even told her that her mom had walked away and her father had remarried. So why not mention lacrosse? As she debated with herself mentally a certain blonde had noticed her presence.

“Hey, Blake!” Yang shouted as she waved her hands in the air. Her voice brought the alluded one back to reality. “Wanna see our practice game?” she offered. The black haired girl blushed ten shades of red and she didn’t even know why. What was the deal with her? “Blaaaaaaake!"

“Oh… I’m sorry I… I have to get home” she replied finally as she started the car. “Bye!”

“Okay…” the Golden Dragon said under her breath as she watched her drive away. Why had she made such a proposition? And why hadn’t Blake stayed? They had a very good time the day before and, even is she was the one doing most of the talking, she had taken a liking to her. They could be very good friends or maybe…

“What are you doing talking to the new girl?” she heard behind her back. She turned around to see Emerald, one of Cinder’s minions as she liked to call them. If she wasn’t such a great player Yang would really hate her.

“I’m being nice… What’s the problem?” the captain replied.

“She’s a complete loser. Don’t bring her to our practice” this time it was Cinder who did the talking as she walked towards both girls. Yang despised her. When they met it elementary school they had actually become very close friends and they had trusted each other with very personal issues. The blonde had told her about her family situation and her struggles with reading. Cinder, on the other hand, had told her about being adopted and how her biological parents had treated her like shit as a kid.

Everything changed when, in seventh grade, Cinder entered the lacrosse team. She quickly became one of the best and ended up convincing Yang to sign in. The blonde had played several sports in elementary and middle school but hadn't been in any official team yet. It didn't take long before the Golden Dragon awoke. Yang was simply too good and the team was quick to notice and celebrate. Cinder, on the other hand couldn’t deal with Yang being better than her even thought she had been the one that suggested her to try out in the first place. They had been rivals ever since and the animosity between the two was palpable. When Yang had made captain Cinder was the only one not to congratulate her.

“Chill out, fire demon” the blonde replied, making emphasis on the nickname.

“Don’t call me like that or I might have to…”

“What’s the deal girls?” coach Ironwood yelled before blowing on his whistle. He was getting pretty fed up with his players losing priced training time. There was a tournament getting closer by the day.

“Sorry, coach!” Emerald replied as she ran back to practice. Yang and Cinder stared at each other intensely.

“If you want to preserve your current popularity status I’d recommend staying away from Belladonna. She doesn’t belong with our crew”

“Why do you have to be so mean?” Yang asked. Cinder snickered.

“It’s not personal. It’s just the way things are” she said “And there are things not even the Golden Dragon should be doing. That girl is fucking weird”

“Shut up, bitch, you don’t even know her” hearing that demon talk trash about Blake was enough to make her really mad.

“Make me you retard” the dark haired girl spat. “I may be a bitch but at least I know how to read”

“I’m not going to say it one more time get back here or I’ll suspend you both from the team!” the couch yelled once more, his voice cracking with anger. Yang turned around and started running back to practice. She was livid with rage. She and Cinder had an unspoken agreement to keep each other’s secrets secret. Still, the dark haired girl had no problem in bringing it up when it was just the two of them.

“Thank you for blessing us with your presence” Nora joked as Yang got closer to the rest of her teammates.

“What was the deal with Cinder?” Pyrrha asked raising an eyebrow.

“The usual” their captain replied “She’s a bitch”

“Who was that girl you were waving at?” Nora questioned.

“That’s Blake” the blonde answered “She lent me her library card the other day”.

“Oh I know her!” Pyrrha exclaimed suddenly “She’s the girl that got transferred from Menagerie” That made a lot of sense. Every since the island of Menagerie had gained independence from Vale, many people had started hating its inhabitants for rejecting their country. Now that their new government had decided to reunite with its motherland a civil war had started. It was pretty understable that Blake had no time to take her books with her. She had probably ran away in fear. It also explained why Cinder hated her so much. She was quite the xenophobe even if she wouldn’t say it explicitly. Yang had seen her be rude to Sun and Velvet, two other students transferred from Menagerie, several times.

“I don’t want to sound mean but why would you want to be friends with her with all the trouble it would cause you if you already have us as friends and we are honestly the bestest of best friends?” Nora asked in a single breath. Yang laughed.

“She’s nice. That’s all” she lied. She might not be that good at school but she was pretty good at identifying her feelings. Years of therapy after her mom abandoned her had taught her that. There was more there than she wanted to know. She had just met Blake and most of all Blake was a girl. Patch could be a very beautiful town but it was pretty conservative. When she was a freshman there was this girl, Coco, who decided to come out of the closet. She was pretty cool and popular and had been for very long so she thought she could actually be herself. Once the truth was out things rapidly changed. No matter how strong Coco was or how high she had been on the social pyramid, the bullying just got worse and worse with time. One day somebody broke a glass bottle on her head in the school’s parking lot. Her family left town two days later. All Yang had to do was remember she was straight. She had to be straight even if a part of her knew that she had always liked girls. She couldn’t do this to her family, to her reputation. Then why did she want Blake to see her practice? Why did she want to ask her out so badly?

…….

“Here you go, Mis Xiao Long” Goodwitch said as she handed her back her essay once the class was over. “Better luck next time” Yang looked down at her paper and her eyes shot open immediately at the sight of a big red D minus. She had failed.

“But.. I…What did I do wrong? I did the task!” the blonde asked with a frown.

“It is not about doing the work just to hand in something. You have to actually think and make valid arguments” the teacher explained with a severe tone “I gave you one extra day and yet you barely did any work”.

“I can’t fail this class. I can’t fail any class or I won’t be able to play the tournament”

“I fail to see how that is my problem” the woman replied as she started gathering her things.

“Please let me do some extra work. I’ll do anything” Yang begged, tears starting to build up in the corners of her eyes. Why was she such a pain in the ass? Why couldn’t Goodwitch be like the rest of the teachers that gave her passing grades for being the team’s star? “Please” she repeated. The blonde woman let out a sight.

“I’ll give you one more chance” she said finally rolling her eyes “I’ll give you a passing grade on the essay if you do the assignment one more time. Double the word count and the bibliography. You have until friday”

“Thank you so much” the Golden Dragon replied. She wasn’t really sure how she would tackle this challenge but at least it was another chance. She walked back to her place to get her books when her eyes fell on Blake at the back of the class. Yang knew getting close to her could bring her trouble for more than one reason. However, she really needed help with the essay. She couldn’t fail world history. She’d just have to see her outside of school and control herself when they were alone. Piece of cake.

“Hey, Blake” she called as she walk towards the alluded girl. The black haired girl raised her face to look at her.

“Oh, Yang… Hi” Blake replied with a timid smile.

“What are you doing after class?” she asked with a playful grin.

“Well… I was going to do homework and read the book you gave me”

“Would you please help me with the new essay I gotta do? I need to do some extra work to bring my grade up or I’m going to fail” Yang asked, her usual confident tone completely gone. Blake was unsure how to answer. She didn’t want to get close to anyone. No one could know there were people she cared about. It was enough putting Illya and her family in danger she wouldn’t bring other people into her mess.

“Sure” Blake answered and she didn’t even realize she had until the word left her mouth. What was going on with her? She hadn’t felt that nervous around someone since…

“YES! Thank you so much! Could we meet at your place? Mine is kinda crowded with my sister, my stepmom, my uncle, my dad…”

“Not… Not really. I live with Illya and her family and I don’t want to intrude by bringing guests” Blake said as her body once more shrunk in embarrassment.

“Oh, okay” the blonde replied “We’ll just study at my house. Give me your number and I’ll message you the address. Could you drop by around 6?” she proposed. She didn’t want to be seen walking home with Blake so meeting later was probably a good call. Blake looked up, her mind settled on saying no. Don’t do this, she repeated in her mind. Don’t say yes. It's too much. It's too dangerous. Its too...

“Sure”

Fuck.

[mcrmadness]

I woke up at noon and I slept about 8 hours (tho first had problems with falling asleep), why do I feel as tired as when I’ve stayed up 24 hours???

I wish my brain would get its shit together and would stop producing the melatonin WHEN IT’S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE PRODUCED. I have been up for 3 hours and I feel like I’d have stayed up for 20h.

I hate this so much. I mean, it’s a feeling that just totally makes me incapable of doing anything, it causes me sensory overload and makes the executive dysfunction even worse. I don’t have energy to anything because all I can feel is my body wanting to go back to bed but I don’t want to go back to bed because I should wake up around 10am tomorrow and I cannot sleep at night at all if I take a nap now because I only can take 6h naps, shorter ones just make me feel more tired than what I am now and I’m not able to get up after like, 15min nap. I will feel so terrible that closing your eyes again has never felt as good as when snoozing (or turning off) an alarm clock after a short nap.

I know this is basically jetlag because I desperately try to move my sleeping schedule backwards because next week I should be elsewhere already at 9am and then on Wednesday I should be behind the wheel at 7am and I think I have to drink coffee that morning or I can’t do shit, I have never liked driving in the morning because I’m a night owl and I will always feel tired in the mornings because my inner clock just doesn’t go together with the society’s idea of mornings. For me already 9am is early so starting my car at 7am feels the same as if someone who’s an early bird should wake up and start driving after 2am. And for me the best time to drive a car is between 8pm and 2am. I literally always arrived around 11pm to my school on Sundays because I was procrastinating so hard with leaving that’s when I am the most awake and that is the safest time for me to drive, I easily get sleepy behind the wheel when driving long distances and it doesn’t matter how much I have slept the previous night, I’ll always be extremely tired in the mornings and you should never drive when tired but how can I avoid it when I’m ALWAYS tired before noon???

That is why I feel so tired when it’s 3pm and I can only dream about falling asleep at midnight but once the clock hits 9pm, I’m not longer tired. I cannot falls asleep nor stay asleep that early yet (and if I do, my brain will wake me up after 1am because it thinks it was just a nap - at nighttime we can do 3h naps even!). It often is that I’m extremely tired during the day and can’t get anything done and THEN when I should start preparing myself for bed, I suddenly feel awake and feel like I have all the energy for all the things I wanted to do. But I can’t start anything because I don’t have enough time. If it’s 9pm, it’s still too late because I easily can hyperfocus on things and then I’m sitting here still at 6am because I’m never too tired at night, only at daytime.

[drabblesanddreams]

Hi !i hope you enjoyed your vacation! Can you write a atsushi x blind reader and she falls in love with his voice and it kinda takes him a while to like her?

Hi! I did enjoy it thank you so much:) Sorry this piece took so long i was honestly kind of scared to write a disabled reader as i didnt want to fuck it up but at least i tried haah! Also i tried writing a reader who didnt work in the ADA which i hope worked out good, regardless thank you so much for your request, i hope it turned out to your liking though i did get carried away as its a little longer than usual…

Word count: 2.6k

Pairing: Atsushi x reader

TW: nothing

Summary: Basically u cant see much and atsushi is insecure cutie again

It was a long day ofworking and there was nothing that you wanted more to do then go to bed forwhat would seem like all of eternity, that’s how tired you are. Yawningslightly, you made your way up the stairs to your apartment with a relativeamount of ease. 

Your body had already gotten familiar to the pathway to your livingspace, although you were partially blind. You had been partially blind yourwhole life, only being able to recognize the shifting of light and whatnotbehind your (e/c) eyes. 

The familiarity of the routine encompassed a feeling ofserene comfort. All your life, you relished in the concept of order, everythinghad their place in the world and you greatly respected that notion. It onlymade living life a tad bit easier, with that belief you had clung onto.

As you continued toclimb the stairs, you briefly let go of the railing in order to place a handupon the wall, letting it travel upwards as you felt up the hard, stone surfacebeneath it. 

You recognized the sudden shifting of light and realized that youwere at the top of the stairs now. Making haste, you walked the approximate numberof steps that you were familiar with in order to get to your door and unlockedit, before scurrying inside in and shutting the door behind you.

You briefly turned onthe light in order to recognize the area in which you should place yourbelongings and did so before making your way sleepily to your bedroom.

 You didn’teven bother changing into your pajamas and instead just settled for strippingout of your work clothes so that you were in your undershirt and underwear.

  Allin all it was kind of a shitty day, you thought as you settled into yourbed. See, you worked in a café that normally wasn’t this exhausting but todayit seemed as if you had received a greater number of either ignorant or rude customers.Accompanied by the fact that your manager asked you to stay back to close onlyirked you even more. 

This had overthrown your routine and you were upset aboutit as you had most likely missed your favourite part of each day.

Unfortunately, youlied in bed feeling quite awake now.

Of course, that was until you heard it, hisvoice.

Smiling to yourself,you rolled over in bed until you were closer to the thin walls that separated youand your neighbor. You could clearly make out the mutterings and comments madeby your neighbor, Atsushi Nakajima. 

Every night the poor boy would come backhome and spend half an hour or so speaking to someone, most likely over thephone, about the day’s mission he had to endure. It was always so entertainingto you, his whole life was an adventure to you, almost like a good book that hewould speak verbally out loud to. It always lulled you to bed ever since hefirst moved in. 

From what you could gather, he was a recent employee of theArmed Detective Agency starting from a few months back. 

This agency was right besidethe café that you worked at so you always managed to hear him there as well asin the mornings when both of you would greet each other a good morning.

You let your eyelidsfall shut as you homed in on his soft voice. Unlike the noisy sounds of thecity that so often gave you a headache, his voice was incredibly soothing andquiet.

 It was always accompanied by gentle undertones as well which shocked youslightly at first as you couldn’t believe how someone could be that type ofkind. 

His voice was almost to the point of melodic, the words that would takeform by his tones would spin into a plethora of stories and recounts that youyourself liked to listen to as you fell asleep.

Besides his voice, hehimself was a kind and gentle person. You had heard that way he had interactedwith his co-workers in your café, his undying patience in the antics of his,what you assumed to be, supervisor Dazai Osamu. 

The interactions between thetwo never failed to make you chuckle as you would hide your amusement behindthe coffee machines.

Through all this, itwas no surprise that you fell in love with him.

Unfortunately, the feeling was not mutual as both of you were mere acquaintances. 

But you werefine with this, as much as it pained your heart you accepted that not everyonein the world was lucky enough to be loved back by the person that theycherished close to their heart.

With this thought inmind, you let yourself quickly let yourself succumb to the sweet promise ofsleep with Atsushi’s voice in the background.  

Hours later, yousnuggled into your comforter serenely, turning over and inhaling deeply. It hadbeen quite a while since you’ve been this well rested.

 In fact… the mere notionof how well rested you were feeling was a tad bit suspicious.

 Throughthe foggy haze clouding your mind, you shot up in bed as a shocking realizationshot through you. It seemed that you had been so exhausted the previous nightthat you had forgotten to set your alarm for the upcoming workday.

The possibility thatyou had slept in quickly caused your heart to speed up slightly in fear thatyou completely missed your shift. “Siri, what time is it?” you demanded as youdistressingly rolled out of bed.

“The time is 6:47 am” YourAI responded back in that calm, robotic annoyingly professional voice. A suddenbout of irritation shot up through your body, how could this stupid phone be socalm when you were here panicking the hell out, trying to find your belongings?

 Shaking your head, you focused on the fact that you had 13 minutes to get to workand you had to scram!

You paced around the room, hands reaching out and patting every surface insearch of your work attire. Thank god you had memorized the layout of your flatotherwise you would surely be stumbling across every piece of furniture in yourwake. Okay, so maybe you were stumbling, but not as much as if you were in a completelyunfamiliar place.

Suddenly, your handsfound several articles of clothing and once you had identified them as yourwork clothes by running your fingers over the logo stamped on the shirt, youwasted no time in pulling them on before racing out the door. 

Not so carefullysprinting across the living room, you grabbed your backpack from where you hadthrown it the previous night and pulled open the door. 

Shutting the door behindyou, you turned the corner to the right in order to make it to the stairsbefore you collided with a taller, harder body.

The impact sent yousprawling to the ground and in return, you heard some of your belongings fromyour backpack crash as well. Oh my god, you thought Did I just make afool of myself?!.

“I-I am so sorry sir!”You hurriedly apologized as you dropped to your knees, quickly trying to searchfor your belongings so you could get the hell out of there in order to not be moreof an embarrassment.

“A-ah no it’s my fault,here let me help you,” the other body hastily said back, and you felt your bodygrow hot with the awful realization that you recognized this man’s voice. It wasyour neighbor, freaking Atsushi. It seemed that you had indeed made yourselfout to be an embarrassment. Crashing into your crush on a 7am morning wasnot how you wanted to make your first impression on said crush.  

“You’re too kind, haha,thank you!” You anxiously said back as the both of you quickly gathered the itemsthat fell from your backpack. Once he had finished handing you your items, theboth of you stood up. 

“I-I’m really sorry again, I didn’t see you there,” hesaid, the sound of him scratching the back of his head could be heard and youcould only smile at his nervous behavior. His antics were adorable if you hadto be quite honest. 

“That’s alright Its kind of my fault, I was too much of ina rush to get to work to remember the layout of my surroundings,” you said backapologetically.

A brief pause followed before he cleared histhroat, “You can’t see?” he asked and you could only imagine the cute way hisfeatures would scrunch up, the widening of his beautifully coloured eyes,whatever colour they may be.

 Shyness coursed through you as you nodded, youhoped this fact didn’t define you or change how he would possibly see you inthe future. 

After all, you were more than your disability. You then explained, “I’vebeen visually impaired since I was a kid..b-but I can still see shadows and light,even movement.”

Another pause followedand you swallowed in anticipation of his reply.

“If it’s no trouble miss,please let me walk you to work to make it up for crashing into you!” Atsushi rapidlyoffered and your (e/c) widened. You felt your jaw drop slightly at hisproposition but before you could ask why, he answered for you, “I- you work atRen Café right? Near the ADA?”. You blinked at this; how did he know? Could hehave possibly remembered you from the small interactions you both shared?

“It’s just Dazai’salways talking about how good the coffee you make is which I guess is how I knowyou and its also on the way so it would be no problem.” He shyly explained andyou felt your cheeks heat up at this.

“A-alright,” youaccepted hesitantly and the both of you made your way down the stairs and outof the building, Atsushi kindly offering any assistance if you were in need.

Days turned intoweeks, and slowly this became a part of your routine.

More precisely, Atsushi kindly walking you towork before moving on forward to his own workplace. On those walks, not onlydid you learn more about Atsushi himself, you got to hear more of his voice.

 Throughhis words, you learned about his special ability, about his work as a detective,how Dazai managed to do this, or how his other co-worker Kunikida managed to dothat. It was still as lovely to you as it was back then and only caused you tofall for him even more as you got to know him.

The slight low pitchof his voice grew increasingly more attractive to you with each passing day.

On this particular day,you opened the door of your apartment, “Good morning Atsushi-kun!” you greetedcheerfully, knowing full well that he would always be waiting for you on theother side of the door to walk to work. 

“M-morning (Y/n)-chan!” he replied, andyou could basically sense the smile on his lips. 

Shutting the door behind you,you looped your arm through his before rounding the corner like you would do everyother day. Humming, you let your stride fall into a small skip, unwillinglypulling Atsushi along with your movements. 

“You seem like you’re in a good moodtoday,” he commented as the both of you made your way down the stairs. His armtightened around yours to ensure that you wouldn’t fall as you had done the daybefore. 

Oh, how much you had laughed from the sheer embarrassment of it all ashe quickly fretted over you in clear worry.

“What?” you asked,feigning offense, “Am I not allowed to be happy?” you accused. Laughing at howhe stumbled over his words in an attempt to deny your words, you shook yourhead, “Just kidding!” you giggled.

“(y/N)-chan!” hewhined adorably at your teasing before quieting down, “(y/n)_chan..” he saidquietly. “Hm?” you hummed at the sudden change of tone.

“I-uh, are you evercurious to how I look?” he asked, and you blinked, turning your head to hisdirection silently probing for him to expand. “I mean, you know what I am.. I mean…the monster inside of me, but you still want to be my friend..” he hesitantly said,“What if…what if it’s only because you can’t see me, the person I could really be…”

You took in his words,confused for a moment before you realized. Something you had not known beforebefriending the detective was his incredible low level of self-confidence. 

Itwas no secret how close the two of you had become recently, you even taking theinitiative to visit him at his workplace as he would do the same to yours. 

Hemust have been blaming his current happiness of your friendship because you couldn’tsee, and thus was never witness to his transformation into his alter ego of thetiger.

 Because of this unintentional avoidance of not seeing him at his worst, hemust think that I am in an ignorant position.

Huffing slightly, youfelt your growing irritation spike, “Atsushi, me being blind doesn’t haveanything to do with our friendship or my judgment of your character,” youstated annoyed, “I don’t need to see in order to know what you can become andthe fact that you even think that I need to see in the first place so that our friendshipcan have true meaning is frankly offensive” you furrowed your eyebrows angrily asyou placed your hands on your hips.

“A-ah Im sorry(y/n)-chan! I didn’t mean to insinuate… I just…” Atsushi trailed off andyou sighed, letting your arms fall.

 Softly you took a few steps forward untilyou were sure you were much closer to him. “Atsushi, you know how I know you’rea good person aside from what you’ve told me?” you gently asked. “No, I don’t…”he whispered back.

“Your voice,” youstated.

“M-my voice…?” hestuttered out in confusion.

“Yes Atsushi, yourvoice,” you reaffirmed, “You speak in such a gentle manner, in a way that is socomforting and serene to the people around you, its so full of kindness andpatience and that is so rare to find in a world like this.”

“It paints me all thepictures ill never see which I’m fine with because I would honestly just have yourvoice then see any of the sights of the world…and I don’t know about youAtsushi but I don’t think anyone would describea monster like that” you continued to explain before letting the silencesink in as he took in your words. 

Exhaling, you took a step forward and reachedfor his hand, intertwining it with your own. Tilting your head upwards, you leta sudden burst of confidence fill you as your nose brushed against his, “(Y/n)-chan”he stuttered out, but you never let him finish.

“Your voice is the most beautiful thing I’veever heard” you admitted in a shy whisper.

 Where this confidence came from, youhad no idea, but he had to know how much of a good person he was, how he wasnot the monster so many people had previously tried to make him out to be.

 Itseemed as even though you were blind, you could see things this man couldn’t.

“(Y/n)-chan…”he breathed out as you felt his hands caress the sides of your face. His foreheadrested upon yours before he whispered, “thank you” and then you felt his softlips claim yours.

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

When asked to write a daily diary for anxiety management.

Here are a few days example....

Sunday 24th 

Mood/anxiety = numb. 

Additional meds =8mg of diazipam.

My whole body aches yet it shouldn't. My stomach is growling yet i feel physically sick. 

Things i ask myself....

Q.1 Will i leave my safe space, weighted blanket & mountain of pillows?

A.1 NO. 

Q.2 Will i manage my yoga routine

A.2 NO

Reasons....Why

I feel exhausted even though ive not been outside since Thursday. I just want the aching to subside the pain to leave. My jaw is clenched closed making eating an ordeal. I know this needs to be done. 

The dread of what passive aggressive message/s ill receive today either in person or written either way im struggling to motivate myself to move.

The Internet has been blocked for nearly a wk now. But i just let it slide as the saying goes choose your arguements "wifi is not the hill i want to die on" quote from TBBT. I hear Luke (my brother) is now in his bedroom and his door is closed. He has been banging around the house sending passive aggressive messages (sms) since 4am. My belongings that i left downstairs were thrown into my room. I'm nervous to leave my room till i know he is asleep. 

Flashback/negative thoughts....

1. How can my baby brother be an emotional manipulator. 

2. Last time i had to justify my everymove i was in Portugal in a very bad relationship. 

*****Ways im looking to excuse his behaviour. Find the cause to my sudden crash of low mood aka depression with a nice battle of anxiety.

---Logically i know its not the same. 

---Emotionally it hurts the same. 

The way he looks at me with disgust, resentment & impatience is the trigger. I realise this. How someone you love can make you feel this way. 

Solution: i decide to find a solution to the sudden conflict of money and i know there is a receipt in the car. I go to the normal place the keys are kept and theyre no where to be found. I look in all the obvious logical places they  could be and realise theyre hidden by my loving brother. His Reasons, 1-to stop me  buying shit (his words). 2. He has decided its his house, his car so therefore his rules. (Its all my mums btw)

As im downstairs i notice the kitchen is a mess. Pots all over from a feast Luke cooked up the night before. Or should i say 2am. 

So i feel defeated. Ive basically been cleaning non stop everytime i use a room as per gov guidelines and he just doesnt seem to comprehend the severity of the situation. 

I decide i need to eat. So i opt for Shreddies with Oat Milk (Luke has a serious milk allergy to the milk proteins in cows milk so im not fussed about milk and am happy to use alternatives) topped with vanilla soya yogurt, bannana, a few cranberries, 3 strawberries, sultanas and crushed Almonds. My logical brain is telling me eat well as we are not leaving the bedroom again unless desperate. 

I send a few messages to the family whats app (Luke refuses to be a part of this) and receive encouraging and support in return. Everyone is struggling in their own way so i appreciate having a small outlet between us all.

After food i sleep finally. 

Trying now to Ready myself for round 2 which i know is coming.

My mum calls i dont want to answer but i do. I explain the situation. She knows, she has dealt with his angry behaviour since he was 11yrs old. She stated she is coming to visit Tuesday as per new gov guidelines and we will meet in the park. She then asks me to pass the phone to Luke which i pointblank refuse. Im not ready for round 2 yet. Especially since he has his own phone he is just not answering making everyone worry about him but he just resents it. Its safe to say im proud i refused to do something. Gold star award ⭐

Monday 25th

Mood/Anxiety -  still no change from yesterday but i decide i have to force myself to move. Wash, clean and pack the additional things my mum has requested. 

Additional meds - i decided against taking anything today as i need to be clear headed for my appointment Tues and obvs my mums visit.

I check the weather see its a nice day decide washing is task 1. I set a bath running (multi tasking saving time from all the free time) and head downstairs to pop the washing machine on. Before i left my room i checked my phone for messages i have one from my mum telling me she has had words with Luke and that he needs to basically deal with the resentment in a more positive way. 

This explains all the banging and loud music yesterday early eve. He decided to actually clean. 

Anyhow I head downstairs. Kitchen is clean, messages all wiped from the black board. 

I decide i must try and communicate with Luke as we cant take the conflict with us to the park it isnt fair to our mum. 

I can hear him moving so send a sms message asking if he wants anything in the oven. No response. ***He did finally get out of bed at 3pm so a peaceful day so far. 

I decide food is required. I opt for protein soya burgers x2 with Spinach, tomatos, avacado, sultanas, almond pieces and some crumpets. I sit in the garden to eat.

All washing is out and drying but im to anxiety ridden and unmotivated to enjoy the sunshine. 

I head back to my room to sort bits for my mum and throw away my origami collection. It was over taking my room and again causing conflict. 

Lukes awake!!!. I decide to say hello. So far so good. He decides to make himself lunch and throws a fit because i ate a £0.45 avocado. I walk away as i know he is just venting and i need to not start the circle of negative thoughts or interactions. This is rewarded with resentment. Luke suddenly decides to do his own washing and cut the grass. Which means my washing is in his way. Before he even starts i am pulling in whats dry mainly because i want to go back to bed and need my bedsheets but also because he wont care if my washing turns green or is damaged. To my delight my sheets are dry but my pjs etc need another 30mins so i leave them whilst i go and make my bed. 

Im bellowed at about washing as Luke needs the line. So i head down stairs to reteive the rest of my belongings. 

Self soothing thoughts...

Im walking on eggshells trying not to provoke the beast and i need to keep going. Focus on my achievements. I left my room. I cleaned myself, my clothing and my pillow fort which has been my safe zone for the past 4days. 

Deep down thought i am disappointed as i know isolation and distancing is not a long turn solution as the yrs pass im becoming more and more isolated and lonely. 

Im downstairs again and i ask Luke if he wants anything popping in the oven as i was having toast. He requested 2 burgers and chips but on seperate trays as he was hungry. Easy to do popped into the oven. 40mins later chips are cooked he is plating up and all he says is "why have you cooked so many chips, clearly we now live in a household of wastefulness". 

This was the turning point for me id had enough for 1day and just told him to give it a rest and went to my room. 

Im dozing with Big Bang on in the backround and Luke is banging on my door. Mums on the phone. Confirming arrangements for tomorrow. I say a few oks with the occasional nod. 

I start packing the bits n bobs my mum has asked for and carry then downstairs so theyre ready for the car tomorrow am. 

Its PJs and bed time. Luke has other ideas. He is awake and up and about at 4.30am. Having a bath at 5am, doing weights after his bath at 6am then leaves in the car at 7am. He is back around 8am banging has a shower then decides to leave again in the car. He is meant to be house-bound until July 1st. This in itself causes me anxiety as i cant handle watching another member of my family die in front of my eyes. 

Thoughts...

Yes this is VERY dramatic. STOP IT BRAIN!

Take precautions all will be ok. 

Tuesday 26th

Mood/Anxiety = No change 

Additional meds = 4mg diazipam but late afternoon as i couldnt stop shaking and fidgeting.

My mum is coming to visit. Im trying not to think about the fact Luke is out of the house. 

We are having a picnic social distancing style. 

We head to the coop as Luke has decided even after knowing our mum all his life never be on time, we have to be early. I buy Costa coffee, fresh bread, hummus, bananas, diet coke and some biscuits the nature valley ones theyre really good. Luke doesnt go into the shop I think at least he is listening to some rules. He rolls his eyes as i spray the shopping with dettol spray and use the alcohol hand sanitizer for my hands and door handle etc. I just tell him its how it needs to be done.

We find a perfect parking spot under a bunch of trees. I notice that all the trees are trimmed in a very even shelf across the bottom. It looked like it was designed perfectly for people to walk straight onto the park from the car park without having to fight with tree branches or go around.  But in actual fact its the deer. They eat the lower leaves this made me smile and relax for a moment. WIN.

My mum is late so im nervous that she is 

1. Stuck somewhere (over reaction)

2. Lost (over reaction)

3. Just running late (normal reaction) 

Im a tad fidgety as im aware i have an appointment in 2hrs. Hurry up MOTHER...

I ponder about work and whether or not ill still have a job to return too. Had an email this am stating theyre cutting 200jobs from the team i work in. So not sure if thats a good thing or not. But its also increasing my anxiety as ive read the email and now have a burning desire to do the research to see what my probability of keeping my job will be. Before my brain can go on a major tangent my mum arrives. 

Shes brought Oscar (her poodle) he is so excited to see me. And the big hairy fluff ball  gave me the biggest snuggles. He has a major Covid hairdoo. My mum doesnt hug me which hurts but i know she cant. 

Picnic time. We sit in the middle.of a field away from everyone. Social distancing 10/10. My mum has made me my favourite cakes, rock buns. (Apparently these are a northern thing) but im feeling the love. Its fairly chilled only 1 disagreement with Luke over blinkin avocados.

Im clock checking and aware of impending appointment, im a little (understated) nervous because ive not had positive relationships with therapists or doctors in the past. 

[honeyboyfelix]

1 through 47 answer pls 😩🙏

1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend?~ im a ok with either 

2.When did your last hug take place?~ uh..............its been months

3.Are you a jealous person?~ hmmm it depends i get friend jealous :l but thats cause im used to being replaced 

4.Are you tired right now?~ always!

5.Do you chew on your straws?~ of course i do how do you not???

6.Have you ever been called a tease?~ asdfgh yeah

7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?~ im sure i have at least once

8.Do you cry easily?~ i have been recently but i didnt before i got into kpop

9.What should you be doing right now?~  hhhh its exactly 9pm rn so playing dnd

10.Are you a heavy sleeper?~ hmmm no

11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months?~ 2/3 of my relationships have lasted more then 6 months so yes (the third lasted a week...we dont talk about that)

12.Are you mad at someone right now?~ uh no? i dont thinki am

13.Do you believe in love?~ yes

14.What makes you laugh no matter what?~ watching mbmbam compliation

15.Who was the last person you talked to?~ im talking to my dnd group rn~

16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like?~ yes

17.Will you get married?~ hmmm i dont know i dont think you need to be married to be in love (but those tax benefits tho 👀)

18.When was the last time you smiled?~ uh rn, but i smile all the time, i make it mandatory to try to smile everyday

19.Does anyone like you?~ god if i know

20.Do you secretly like someone?~ hmmmm rn? no i dont like to have crushes on people who i dont know if they like me so i just dont??????

21.Who was the first person you talked to today?~ uh goblinon

22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?~ also goblinon~

23.What are you NOT looking forward to?~ whatever the fuck dm chris has planned for us today, he keeps mentionaing that shits going down soon and im scared

24.What ARE you looking forward to?~ christmas! the secret santa event! levanter!! so much to be excited

25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it?~ uh yeah im sure someone has (its hard to tell if people mean it but plenty have told me they love me)

26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do?~ uh turn and walk away? i dont like watching people kiss but i wouldnt care if my ex was kissing someone like???? not my problem

27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year?~ uh i hope i can but probably not

28.Are you a forgiving person?~ i try to be :]

29.How many TRUE friends do you have?~ uh...pass

30.Do you fall for people easily?~ yes

31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend?~ nah

32.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth?~ coffee

33.Who was the last person you drove with?~ my mom

34.How late did you stay up last night and why?~...7am because im a menace to society

35.If you could move somewhere else, would you?~ absolutely 

36.Who was the last person you took a picture of?~ my cat

37.Can you live a day without TV?~ yep 

38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?~ uh idk

39.Three names you go by..~ sam, sami, nani

40.Are you currently in a relationship?~ nope~

41.What is your all-time favorite romance movie?~ uh i cant think of any rn

42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?~ uh no i think that people have soulmates but not just one

43.What’s your current problem?~ depression

44.Have you ever had your heart broken?~ uh no? maybe?

45.Your thoughts of long distance relationships?~ im alright with them! theyre a little complicated but if you love someone its worth it~

46.How many kids do you want to have?~ uh currently 0

47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them?~ yes 😫

i finished it ayyy thank you for asking anonnie i love youuuuu~ 

[ventrue-rosary]

“You’ve been out for days.” For Amaranthe and Balthazar?

God this has been sitting in my inbox for months but I had a little idea for a fic which fit this perfectly, so enjoy!

Ko-Fi

‘Cut!’ 

Amaranthe sighs as she flops down in her chairs, accepting the proffered bottle of water from one of the interns. 

She thought modelling exhausting work, but acting is on whole new level, even just for commercials.

‘Alrights that's a wrap people,’ the director calls.

‘Thank the gods,’ she murmurs, mincing to the dressing room. It isn't often she is so eager to take off her face but the artists had been overzealous with the foundation. Like anyone needs that amount of makeup.

By the time she reaches the dressing room she feels...off. A very tender stomach. She did think the salad looked rather sad and wilted when presented to her it. It must have been out of date.

She makes it to her vanity, despite the overwhelming fatigue. She really is unwell. She reaches for her bag to call for Balthazar to pick her up. It's just out of reach. She leans far out of her chair and falls to the ground.

‘Shit!’ Amaranthe hisses. Her ears ring. The room spins. She wants to puke.

‘Let me help you.’ A voice pierces through the ringing. 

She allows them to pull her up.

‘I don't feel well. I need to get home…’ Her eyes flutter as exhaustion surges behind them.

‘I’ll take you home. Don't worry.’ He hoists her over his shoulder as her consciousness slips away.

Amaranthe emerges slowly from a dreamless sleep. Her head thumps rhythmically as she slowly opens her eyes. A bright light causes it to spike. She throws her head to the other side with a moan. Only then does she notice the manacles binding her wrists and ankles to a chair. She tries to struggle free, shaking and then straining against her restraints.

‘Hello? HELLO!’ Her hoarse voice breaks. Her eyes close from the pain. So thirsty…

‘Please don't yell. I’m right here.’

Her eyes open. A pair of male hands hold a plastic cup of water. They press it to get lips and she drinks greedily, slaking the burning thirst. 

Amaranthe peers up at her benefactor and blinks in confusion and shock, seeing cloudy grey eyes and tousled sandy hair.

‘You...from the studio? You have to let me out, please!’

He reaches over and cups her face. His touch makes her skin crawl.

‘Why would I do that after all the trouble I went through to get you here?’

Amaranthe trembles and shivers but not from his words. She nearly blacks out, her surroundings fading to a dim blur.

‘HEY!’ A sharp slap brings her back to the present.

Amaranthe gasps as she opens and closes her jaw to check the damage. The strike certainly stings.

‘Seems the drug is still in your system.’ He sighs as he stands back, pondering her. ‘But can I really afford to wait? A high profile woman goes missing, people notice.’

Amaranthe ignores him for now to take stock of her surroundings. For any clue to her location or any tool to help her escape. 

The room is large and mostly empty, just one door on the far wakk. The part of the room she is in is mocked-up to look like a studio for a photo-shoot, a plain back-drop behind her, studio lights and a tripod aiming a camera at her.

No way for her to escape on her own. 

‘Why did you bring me here?’

He chuckles as he kneels down in front of her. ‘Is it not obvious? We are meant to be together.’

Great. He’s not just sadistic, he's a nut job, she thinks to herself, cursing silently.

How long has he shadowed her steps, waiting, watching, wanting? How long had she been ignorant to his presence?

‘So you love me?’ 

‘Of course!’

‘You’d do anything I asked?’ 

‘I would burn the world and everyone in it, if you asked.’

‘Then can you undo these restraints? How am I supposed to return your love when I’m chained down?’

He smiles. Amaranthe supposes it must be kind, but it's like like a wolf baring its fangs.

Her vision blurs again. She’s losing lucidity 

‘Darling, you don't need to do anything to prove your love, other than sit there and be perfect.’

Her head lulls. She clings to whatever consciousness remains, but it escapes her.

‘See?’ A camera shutter snaps. ‘You're perfect just the way you are…’

Amaranthe awakens again. She has no idea how much time has passed, but she feels more alert and awake, like a fog has lifted from her mind.

She's alone the time, no sign of her captor. She tries her manacles again, and gasps from the pain of the cold metal against her broken skin.

Amaranthe's mind wanders out of her prison to the outside world. Vander and Balthazar...surely they both noticed she is missing. Balthazar at the very least expected her home after the filming. How long exactly had passed since then? 

She wishes he was here to take her away from this awful place.

She whispers her name in the dark, a private wish she speaks into existence. 

Footsteps echo down from across the room. A door opens and the lights flicker on. She squints as the harsh fluorescents assault her eyes.

‘Good morning, my love,’ he greets her exuberantly, holding a tray with a plate of scrambled eggs, sausages and hash browns and a cup of water. Her eyes notice the knife on the plate. ‘Hungry?’

‘How long have I been here?’ She asks. Her throat itches once more.

‘Almost twelve hours. It’s 7am--breakfast time.’ He pulls up a chair in front of her, and holds out a forkful of eggs. ‘Eat.’

Amaranthe turns her head away. She couldn't possibly stomach any food now.

‘Don't be stubborn now, love, you need to eat.’

‘I don't want any food,’ she mumbles.

‘It’ll help you feel better. Now open wide--’

The manacles offer her a few inches of movement--just enough. She kicks the leg of his chair. He falls back, the tray flying from his grasp. She manages to use her foot to pull the knife towards her as he recovers.

‘LOOK WHAT YOU DID!’ He roars, spittle flying. He takes a few deep breaths, fists clenching and unclenching. ‘I didn't mean to yell. But you ruined breakfast. Now I need to...I need to clean this up. And arrange a suitable punishment for you.’ 

He casts her a dark look before he leaves the room, the door slamming in his wake.

Amaranthe wastes now time. She swings her chair from side to side until she falls on the ground to the right. Her fingers blindly grope until they clasp the hilt of the knife. She twists it in her grip until the blade rests against her bindings, and begins working. But the chains are metal. It would take hours to saw through them.

‘Fuck! Please…’ she begs as she continues, as though prayers alone would free her.

A yell and a series of dull thuds sound from upstairs. The knife clangs against the tiled floor. Silence falls, but not for long.

Two sets of feet descend down towards her. Neither are her captors.

The door swings open. Balthazar and Vander step through, appearing frantic. They take one look across the room before they spot her.

‘Amara! Oh, god...what did he do to you?’ Balthazar gently caresses her face. She breaks into sobs.

‘You came...you both came.’

‘Of course we did.’ Vander pulls out some lock picks and gets to work freeing her from her manacles.

When they finally fall from her limbs, it is a feeling of utmost freedom and relief. She throws herself into Balthazar's arms, relishing in the warmth and protection.

‘Come on, sweetie. Let's get you home.’ He throws his jacket over her shoulders before taking her up in his arms, carrying her away.

The limo is waiting outside. Vander sits close in back with her, chatting idly mostly to make sure she remains conscious.

Amaranthe makes it for the whole journey to the hospital before she falls back into unconsciousness once more. Vander's gentle voice lulls into a muffled whisper, then silence.

Amaranthe’s rest is interrupted by the steady beep of a heart monitor. Her eyes meet the fluorescent lights above, fending off the impending dim of dusk. She winces as her wakefulness draws awareness to her aching body, and the nausea swirling in her stomach. 

Her stirring rouses Balthazar dozing in the chair at her bedside.

‘Finally awake, sleeping beauty?’ he smiles at her sleepily. ‘You’ve been out for days. I’ll get the nurse.’

‘No!’ She seizes hold of his forearm. ‘Please, stay.’

‘Of course.’ He settles back into his chair, holding her hand between his. ‘How do you feel?’

‘Exactly as expected after sleeping through for days.’

Balthazar laughs softly, but the levity is short-lived. ‘Amara, do you remember what happened?’

Her eyes drop to the blanket covering her lower half. She idly picks at a loose thread. ‘Of course I do.’

‘Can you tell me?’

‘I was done shooting for the day. I drank water from one of the interns...then I woke up there in that...place. He took a photo.’

‘He took several. We found them,’ he corrects her gently.’

Amaranthe only feels sicker, her hands instinctively curling into fists. She had only been conscious for one. ‘May I see them?’

‘Sorry ...we turned them into the police. For evidence.’

‘Of course.’

‘Did anything else happen while you were there?’

‘He didn’t rape me, if thats what you’re asking.’

‘It wasn’t but....that’s a relief.’

‘What did you do to him?’ Amaranthe raises her gaze to his. Tears spill from her eyes as an uncustomary anger consumes him. ‘What did you do?’

‘He won’t hurt you, again. Or anyone. We made sure of that.’

‘Good.’