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No jokes here. The Navy’s best pilot and the Navy’s best admiral. Between them, eight air-to-air combat kills and five stars. These were men who commanded respect with or without your approval. This was the picture of ruthless competence.
Debriefing (& Other Stories) • part 2 of Easier Done Than Said by @compacflt
#easier done than said by COMPACFLT#this is one of my alltime favourite fics rn#and probably for the rest of time too#its a topgun fic written by COMPACFLT and its insane and its so fucking good#its basically a canon rewrite of#top gun 1986#and#top gun maverick#and spans thirty years of Ice and Mavs relationship#theres just so much in this#so much emotion and characterization and everything#which has driven me insane that im having one hell of a dopamine comedown this week after having read it#i highly reccomended people go read it cause its just really that good#pete maverick mitchell#tom iceman kazansky#bradley rooster bradshaw#jake hangman seresin#i love how the commander wrote mav and ice in this. like theyre clearly military men#but theyre also SO much more#icemav#and theyve taken the canon 'whos the best pilot' and given its own twist#'hes the best pilot in the world'#my heart cant take it anymore#i know im making this sound like 100k words of just fluff but believe me its not#its 30 years of pain and internalised homophobia and time away and falling in love and raising a kid and not once talking about any of it#but the ending is so so so good and the additional parts from different povs literally left me wanting more#i cant do this someone help me go read this go read this go read this#and come cry with me how we cant ever read this for the first time ever again#also shoutout to the commander once again for the insane amount of preplanning and research into the navy theyve done to write this fic#im forver thankful. sorry im a stalker
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*cough cough* @whorules
ooc /
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Not sure who it beat the futz outta but I'm sure they deserved it
#kept going back and forth on whether i wanted to make the blood stand out more#like to i make it bright and very very red or do i leave it more realistic#i ended up sorta compromising and then adding a bit of MBs own fluids to the mix cause why not#Murderbot#fanart#the murderbot diaries#art (asshole research transport)#Murderbot Diaries#secunit#first look at my Perihelion crew logo!#based on some of my favorite shirts from my own closet#shitty background because im working on another pic with a much more elaborate background thats slowly killing me#i have work i need to be doing and a zine piece i need to finish buuuuut my head hurts and rn its just#easier to work on some self indulgent stuff rn#anyway the scene in Network Effect where MB eviscerates the Grey Targets by more or less#liberating them of their spines#lives in my head rent free#i was having a good chuckle at all the tags on my MB character sheet that are like#ITS SO FRIENDSHAPED AND SOFT#because i was already drawing this one of it splattered in blood djejdhsh#get u a blorbo that can be both i suppose!
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More matador!Fernando! Ferrari this time :D (I can't help myself.....)
- facial hair
+ closeups
I really wanted the vibe of this Nando pic, I think I did pretty well??
#GUYS THE BULL DO YOU NOTICE WHAT BULL DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE SUBTEXT DO YOU UNDERSTAND MY IMPLICATION#lmao tho i mostly put it there cause i saw this rly cool pic w the shadow of a bull on a matador's cape#i dont understand how i ended up making this one more intensive and detailed than the other#but im not mad cause i really like it aaahhhhhh#but i think this one took more than 6 hours and the other one was 5½?#and both i ended up working until an absolutely horrible time. dont ask me what time i wrote this post#okay btw i didnt draw that embroidery. thank you medibang pattern brush now beloved 🙏#i think it suits him!!!! i was thinking of doing stars anyways so I'm glad it worked out#two people id like to blame:#thank you 005 for accidentally reminding me of the sword!! im glad his other hand is not just idle :)#and thank you suzuki-ecstar for asking me at some point if id ever draw facial hair on nando#^ particularly the 3 Musketeers look. so thanks. i suddenly remembered and i had to draw it 😭#it kept shocking me how baby faced i drew him every time i took that layer off#also every time i worked on the suit red genuinely ceased being an actual color to me#its bright red right?? like very fluorescent?? but my brain kept going: is this too orange?? this isnt red right????#anyways happy with this!!!!! there were a lot more roadblocks than the other but it all worked out#but wow wish i had this level of diligence for yknow. schoolwork.#i can spend 6+ hours on a drawing straight but school? nah i give up every 20 mins or less fjfkkfl#also not abandoning my other aus or anything but i have a lot more ideas for this honestly#i think the ref pics are a lot easier and more interesting to find than for my other AUs#<- cause its so much more modern lmao. so i have a lot more inspo than trying to find ultra specific 18th century paintings#i wanna draw 3 things rn:#nando w the ceremonial cape. seb in a matador suit. and of course some silly vett//onso in this AU#f1#formula 1#fernando alonso#catie.art.#fa14#matador au
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not me realizing what caused my flare up and why it hasnt gotten better 😭😭
#its my SHOES#the insoles r completely trodden down now and causing pain 😭😭😭💀#as if i can afford new ones this late in the sneakers season#i use skechers arch fit bcos theyre literally the only shoes ive tried that doesnt cause me massive pain from feet up to shoulders#and the insoles r done for now (which i feel is silly that i didnt realize sooner)#im looking @ alternative insoles for a lower price since the shoe itself is technically fine. but u cant buy the skechers insoles seperatel#(fuck u capitalism) but spending that kind of money on insoles that might not even work is also p terrifying tbh#ill see what i can do but for now im basically cuffed to the bed whenever i Dont have obligatory engagements with the irl outside world#my brain is sooooo fried i might as well be put in a medically induced coma 😭😭😭#arfids still rly bad too but tbh its easier now that i dont move a bunch? require less sustenance energy 🙃🙃😭#abyways sry for my rant. im holding out nd miss u all so so so much !!!!!!#these r the longest words ive written for a while. im surprised im so coherent rn#nohr.txt
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actually yeah im gonna be delusional on main to avoid the breakdown a bit more anyways yall imagine IMAGINE if it was fake. IMAGINE. because itd be a funny retcon so id allow it but if hermie was there to steal the mascot suit the entire time he SHOULDVE BEEN MORE FLIRTY WITH NORMAL FROM THE START and i stand by that. but again its a funny retcon. id let it happen!
but im gonna be delusional and im gonna say this: hermie had all the time in the world to steal that fucking mascot suit. he was in normal's room for the entire episode. i know like, dnd combat time works different but the MULTIPLE MULTIPLE monologues and lengthy conversations... hermie had SO MUCH TIME to get that fucking suit and yet he didn't leave the room until normal showed up. NOT EVEN WHEN HE MUSTVE HEARD NORMAL COMING.
so here is my delusional idea. hermie wanted to get back at normal, he knew how to get to the goofs realm, and knows it had to be a heartbreaking scam- and, more than that, that normal has to BELIEVE IT! he spends the backhalf of last episode making the fake badge (another time he had to go get the suit if that was really all he cared about) which he leaves SPECIFICALLY FOR NORMAL TO FIND. and then he waits for normal to follow. and he waits for normal to get to his room to pull off the scam, convincingly enough that it WORKS, normal believes him !
and he'll probably just circle back around to be like haha gotcha THAT is for ignoring me and leading me on >:( only for normal to be actually genuinely upset with him because of how many times normal has been betrayed at this point LMAO
#kasey rambles#dndads#dndads spoilers#hermie the unworthy#normal oak#LISTEN. im trying to avoid thinking too hard about link and scary and taylor and normal's dynamic#all of my energy is going towards oakworthy rn cause its ~easier~#and this makes sense to me!!! it does!!!!#but also like. the idea of this being a long con is equally funny.
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Listening to the Big O soundtrack while doing a homework assignment makes me appreciate the ost more for two sole reasons:
It has multiple Leitmotifs, it’s not just that one song. A lot of songs seemingly reuse similar instruments or elements so it’s very cool it’s a trend.
It’s preventing my fucking mental breakdown from this assignment
#meg text#I’m HGGHHHSHS rn but I don’t wanna get into it#let’s just say this semester been hell and I’m nearing the end but can’t be relived cause that means crutch#oh and next semester cause idk if I mentioned it I have a class every day so- that’ll be something!#and I’m expected to get a job off campus- when it be easier to get a on campus job#but fuck me having a social life ig#its Venty in tags but im probably not gonna delete it cause the ost still peak
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look at this awesome arm i drew
#im having wrist problems rn that are mildly worrying#like i cant flex my hand or bend my wrist back without resistance and pain#but its okay 😁 i will persist#i really dont want to go to the doctor im gonna be honest so im kinda just trucking along like nothing is wrong#and ik thats not good for me but i dont have the mental energy to make a fuss about it rn#its easier ti just get it done and keep going instead of causing a big issue and postponing my homework#even tho i am kinda puttinf it off rn bc its torture#i hate drawing buildings dont ever ask me to draw a building ill fucking get you#hope my design teacher gets put in a saw trap fir all the anguish and anxiety hes caused his students
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I love having OCD. I love having insane panic attacks about insane things my brain makes up that cause me so much anxiety I nearly throw up. I love trying to relax after a long day of work and ending up locked in the bathroom in my minimal spare time trying to remember how to breathe. Because my brain made something up and told me to panic like it was real. I'm having such a fun time.
#its fucking impossible to get in to see my therapist rn and its so frustrating cause like#i could go elsewhere and get appointments easier but my therapist is REALLY good soooooo#im just here like uhmmm. if anyone has a 5pm maitenance appointment they wanna drop me this month. i am having the worst anxiety since....#honestly since a couple year ago when we tried to get me off my antidepressant cause i felt like it wasnt working.#ten milligrams down had me in shambles lmfao#anyways next time i go into my doctor who prescribes for me im gonna talk to her more abt doses like#idk if i can go up on what im on but maybe something else would be better for me after...#over a decade on my current medication.#anyways#vent#personal#anxiety#ocd#tw panic attack mention#mental illness#not yr
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sobbing
#its kinda dumb#but im so angry and heartbroken that katie got rid of all our LPS's#i always have been ig#she did it with a lot of shit that our smaller parts miss really bad#we used to wake up in the middle of the night with anxiety that she had gotten rid of something else we loved and then we'd go check#god i hate her#what the actual fuck#i also used to dread when winter would be over because i knew there would be a mandatory day i had to go through everything#and i wasnt allowed to Not#she's so fucking mean#just. that's a fucking child man#let them have their fucking things#im also angry because i can't replace these things to try and make us feel better or whatever#that's stuff that's just gone and not being produced anymore#im so sad#genuinely someone just was like. I want to die so theres some intense feelings in the brainspace rn#fascinating what stuff really hurts#i'm glad it's not everything anymore#but you'd assume the big stuff would still cause the most distress#granted there is some big stuff that is still heavily dissociated from anyone who fronts#most alters are internal only tbh#or emergency only#i've made a lot of progress but i think ive just realized that there's still a lot to go#and it's probably a lot of stuff that im embarrassed to call trauma#it's easier to call rape trauma than psychological/emotional abuse#even the more covert sex abuse is easier for me to accept
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okiii so what if i was to make a side blog or smth dedicsted to all of my favourite note pages and doodles bc these are so fun to make, launching this at yall
#bio related to physiology and anatomy is the best science jus bc i lov drawing so much for it#and i think its just a lot easier for me to pick up bc i can visualize how all of these body processes are going on in MY OWN body right no#right this second and im like…….woah…. i got action potentials flowing thru my body and causing every function happening in my body rn snd#RAUYGHHGHGHH I LOV PHYSIOLOGY#el.doc#el.mdp
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i need to dye my hair i need to cut my hair i need to bleach my eyebrows again i need to shave them off completely i need to DO something i need CHANGE or ill go insane
#sorry im panicking for no reason whatsoever and need to do THINGS to my mortal body but like.#something that will not cause any actual harm because we dont do that here sir na-ah not anymore#also swinging a bat at the part of my brain that keeps telling me i need to lose weight because i liked my face better X kg ago#and also i need to step on the scale and check how much i weigh now cause what if ive put on weight since spring (i most definitely did)#also my mom keeps nagging me about going to that super great endocrinologist again but last time i went i told him i had an ED and he went#'yes very sad. anyway' and weighed me and told me the number anyway. but hey! he also said#'i have fatter patients than you its ok dw your situation isnt that bad we can concentrate on losing that weight later' so its cool :))))))#(its not. im never fucking going there again id rather rip my whole thyroid out of my throat with my bare hands)#also i really want that rhinoplasty but more than a failed surgery im afraid of betraying my ideals lol#its much easier to be anti make up or anti plastic surgery or preach about self love and acceptance when you're naturally pretty lol#anyway. fucked up mental state rn idk why it was fine an hour ago kms
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ran into my ex best friend today. so that sucked.
#like thank god we didn’t actually interact#i was at my college’s scene shop meeting with its head abt a project#and he just happened to be there#but he kept fucking looking at me#fucking infuriating#at least my friend [redacted] was there#even tho we’re at a weird place rn. some of you may have seen. the posts abt that. el oh el.#at the very least she and I aren’t fighting it’s just tense bc she’s dealing with shit and needs space#whatever I’m getting off topic#almost cried in the car on the way home but like. im fucking done crying over that friendship#even though I have to remind myself that every time I think about it I am literally done#it just sucks cause it would be so much easier if he’d been a really shitty friend. but he was BOTH a shitty friend and a really good one#and I didn’t want that friendship to end. even though looking back I think it’s probably for the best that it did#but yeah. felt like a low blow from the universe to be reminded of losing him at the same time im temporarily losing ms redacted#which is a whole other vent post that im not actually gonna make bc I talked it through pretty well with my best-best friend#honestly it was a little poetic#whatever#personal
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Does Jiro has ghost like abilities (possession, ability to levitate things, etc etc) or does she just live in Shiro's head?
when i created this au, i thought the best option would be for her to be unable to interact with the physical world in any way(including possesion), beacuse i really wanted to lean into her isolation and how it affects her....... and while thats something i still want to emphasise here, lately ive been toying with the idea of jiro being able to impact the physical world somehow(though it still being fairly limited). i think letting her have some control could have a lot of potential! buuuut i also have no idea what abilities i want her to have lol
For now i think im not gonna give her any telekinetic abilities, bc i feel like it would be giving her too much power......... if she could throw shit, shed go APESHIT with it. it would made things too easy for her. i'm sorry babygirl but i'm NOT giving you the possibilty to throw knives and other sharp objects, i dont trust you to not kill someone:/
i really like the idea of her being able to temporarily posses her old body in certain circumstances tho- maybe when shiros uncouncious?? or like when hes is very tired or heavily injured she can kind of 'squeeze through' and take control back for a few minutes???? idk. i think this could be a very cool ability to give her- it cant be frequently used but can also be very helpful, and also theres so much potential for ✨shenanigans✨here>:) oh god i could put these fuckers in so many Situations with this..........
uhhh. so basically i think all of her influence on the physical world are through shiro. shes here bc of her connection to her old body, and thus its the only way for her to interact with anyone besides him- and shes NOT HAPPY about this(neither is shiro).
#ask#thank you for this ask!! it made me think more in depth about jiros abilities and come up with this so thanks<33333#if you have any ideas pls share them with me cause im still not really 100% set on everything lol#also im making a new tag for this au ->#two disasters au#bc. theres two of them.. and theyre both Mentally Unwell#also im gonna use this ask as an excuse to ramble about jiros motivation and character a bit-#okay. so i feel like the most importrant things about jiro are her tunnel vision and self-rightiousness#she gets really focused on one thing at a time and then fixates on it so much that she doesnt see how her behavior affects others#so when she gets evicted from her own body her first reaction isnt 'oh god this is such a messed up and dehumanizing thing to do to your#friend. what the FUCK guys'#its instead 'oh COME ON how am i supposed to be the black paladin without a physical body??? what the FUCK guys'#and bc deep down she KNOWS that if she ever stopped and thought about her situation for like 5 seconds shed just fuckin BREAK. so. she#doesnt do that.#and bc her self worth hinges on being the black paladin#she is really protective of tha title and tries her hardest to make sure shiro knows just how much better at paladin-ing she is than him#and that he wouldnt be able to keep the role without her help#she doesnt have any sense of personhood besides her job and so she clings to it desperately#the same applies to her gender#when jiro gets a new body(did i mention that???? i feel like i forgot to mention that. whoopsie???) he#(sometimes im gonna use he/him for jiro for when im showing things from a certain characters perspective cause thats what pronouns#she was using at the time)(if thats not okay i can stop tho) was trying very hard to pretend that hes just Shiro No. 2 and nothing more#to kinda 'make things easier for everyone' and bc he could FEEL the gender crisis approaching and was just. dead set on ignoring it and#hoping those feelings would go away(spoiler- they very much didnt. it just made things so so much Worse)#so anyway. basically jiro is a person obsesed with being Good Enough and respected but also lacks the experience patience and foresight#wnich results in her ignoring everyone and everything else to focus on doing her job Correctly#does this makes sense?? im still figuring shit out with her but thats what ive got rn
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life is like
extremely vague gestures
#i dont think i want to die today so. thats an improvement from the last two days#but like. i dont know#i got rejected from a job again today. you'd think it gets easier after you stop counting how many times its happened cause its so often#but no not really. and that combined to everything that happened yesterday i just. feel so unwanted#im not good for anything or at anything. i dont know what to do. with myself or my life#i have to put aside plans if i want to eat this month cause everything is so fucking expensive#im so tired. im so lonely. im so useless#i dont know why im sitting here complaining. i dont know. you deserve better than this but i need to get this out of me rn#its all so much. i hate everything#i dont know#night is an absolute mess on main
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YIPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE PRICELESS IS SO GOOD RIGHT... LOVE THE ENDING FOR THAT... and very much anticipating First Penguin's... which I am DETERMINED to continued today... I feel bad for falling behind because I ended up binging a whole anime yesterday since the secondary protagonist was based on Tsutsumi and lost track of Fucking Everything 😭😭😭he is so cute though😚
OH BUT YEAH I played DQXI's demo [the first ten hours of the game or so]... yeaaahhhh... definitely that kind of game for me too... but I hope whenever you get back to it you have a good time! I may not know a thing about Metroid but I am also happy to hear it was an enjoyable experience overall :] I enjoy the tag rambles very much :]
REGARDLESS... EPIC... I HOPE YOU ENJOY SP... OR AT THE VERY LEAST I HOPE YOU CAN STICK WITH IT UNTIL IT BECOMES ENJOYABLE...
AND YOU'RE JUST NOT GOING TO DROP THE TITLE so mean telling me about all these interesting things to watch and not sharin the title (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)
TEN HOURS FOR THE DEMO ??? long as hell demo... OH BUT NO i love the games a lot !! ive followed the series for a while since. i do have that dragon ball/toriyama fanatic in me unfortunately even if i dont like toriyama himself ☠️☠️ i only really got to actually start one of the games last year when my bro got DQXI for me and ive been loving it so far (*￣▽￣*)ミ|Ю
i've BEEN enjoying it so far !! i'm just about to start episode four tho i AM gonna lose my mind if this hospital arc goes on one more episode bro this half the series already ☠️
#snap chats#joking of course.... haha unless--#if this is the chara you mean then he seems like a nice fellow :) i trust his vibes already..... he seems like a chara i'd like...#OH BUT PRICELESS WAS SOOOO GOOD AND SO LOVELY TYSM AGAIN FOR RECCING IT... i hope you enjoy the rest of first penguin !!!!!#NO WORRIES BOUT RUSHIN IT fair nuff theres no deadline !!!! id rather you take your time and enjoy it on your own terms anyhow :)#but SPEEEAAKING of DQ im actually playing it rn LMAO. i only stopped last year cause i just had an awful exp with a boss#and then i got busy with Life but itd been bothering me that i just stopped so i finally decide to get back into it#the boss wasnt even that hard this time around... tho i think thats just cause i went in Prepared this time ☠️#i dont remember why my bro got me DQXI.. i think he was just using some gamestop deal he had and got himself something too..#NOOO UGH i dont know if its in the demo but the boss was arachtagon and he's who i thought of while making that ichi and masato comic LMAO#of course i couldnt reference that fight since.... that wasnt the DQ game of the time... but still we get the point i think...#nono i love dragon quest and playing it's something i'm happy i finally get to do#it definitely requires you to think a lot more and be more careful with what you do#i mean itd PRRROOBBBABLY be easier if i did sidequests but i have a terrible tendency to wanna finish the game first...#in any case. i am playing it while watching SP because i was thinking of the next part of the game and was stuck on it#and when i looked up where to go i was like 'no i already checked that spot' and i was just gonna leave it at that but now i cant stop#but i ALSO really wanted to watch SP today but fortunately i can multitask#not like i need to pay a LOT of attention to dq rn.. im just grinding. cause im broke ☠️#oh but im glad you enjoy the tag rambles :) i have too many thoughts for my own good#like how when i was at the game store i saw DQ treasures AND metroid dread AND the megaman battlenetwork collection..#i was fighting real demons that day not to empty my wallet....#luckily my bro was with me so i felt like him being there was a way to keep me in check. even if he prob wouldnt have opposed (￣▽￣;;)#IN ANY CASE. i have multiple medias to consume lest i let The Thoughts take over my brain again for even a second ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶#inoue's chara is so funny like He's Super Human um doc... i think he's just autistic lowkey..... he still a baller regardless tho
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