#cause i got tons of those

[g00seg1raffe]

So there was a post a while back about Ben Solo always being told "don't do (x), that's how uncle luke lost his hand" when he was a kid - and I raise you: Elrond and Elros being told "don't do (x), that's how Maedhros lost his hand"??

Like, at Amon Ereb when the twins were newly acquired and refusing to eat their vegetables and Maglor is Mag-mothering them until Erestor, feral half-sane clinically depressed anarchist Avari hostage/patient/infiltrator and Certified Little Shit, hits em with:

"I would listen to the Lord Maglor, winyamor, he well knows the dangers that come to young elflings who don't eat enough vegetables - after all, that's how his brother lost his hand."

Elrond looks conflicted. Elros squints suspiciously. "Truly?"

Erestor, practically comatose since the massacre but ultimately saved from Fading by the biological compulsion to fuck with you, lays a hand over his heart. "I would never lie about such a thing! Just what do you take me for? This is a true tale and a grave warning - the Lord Maedhros' hand was tragically lost in the days of his youth, whilst he was still growing as you are. He refused to eat his vegetables and so, cruelly deprived of the strength it needed to grow strong, his body started to fall apart! First his fingers, then his thumb, and then his palm and wrist - all turned blue and dropped off!"

"No!" Elrond gasps. Elros looks both terrified and impressed. Maglor's face is scrunched up into something that the twins probably interpret as pained - at reminder of the horrors of limbs falling off! - but is actually just him busting a rib trying not to laugh.

"Yes!" Erestor cries with relish. "And it never grew back. All because he didn't eat his vegetables. Isn't that right, Lord Maedhros?"

Maedhros, a looming terror at the head of the table, scarred and solemn and impenetrable as his fortresses, narrows his eyes consideringly at the unfolding shenanigans and the rascal behind it. His conclusion? Fuck it. He gives a slow, solemn nod. Completely deadpan and exaggeratedly formal, because it may have been centuries since he last had his brothers smothering laughter at political dinners but the Finwëan sense of humour, once caught, is not an ailment easily cured.

Maglor conceals his wheezes behind his goblet as Erestor nods sagely to the wide-eyed twins, who suddenly seem a sight more interested in their vegetables.

[hana-bobo-finch]

extraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuughhhhh

[sapphicdib]

me: i don’t have chronic pain or a disability!

also me: my head has been hurting for 3 days straight and at this point even 800mg of ibuprofen didn’t help

me: but i don’t have chronic pain or a disability :)!

[terrorbirb]

I'm bored at work so I'm seeing if I should report my old company for violating labor standards.

[keeps-ache]

okay i'm out of evil mode. peace love and a little bit of still-tired on planet earth lol 🧃

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads // twitter thread

Love Letters For Joy

YA contemporary Cyrano de Bergerac retelling

an ace girl with cerebral palsy who’s determined to be valedictorian, with only her academic rival to beat

when her friends start pairing up, she starts to wonder if she wants something like that, and emails the anonymous romance advice email going around her school

[roaringroa]

not to make another post about loving my girlfriend but I LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!

[breawycker]

I was with my brother and the topic of super long video essays came up specifically Jenny Nicholson's 4 hour Star Wars hotel video and Quinton Reviews iCarly and Victorious videoes and he was complaining about going off on tangents and making their videos overly long because they won't shut up and I'm starting to think I'm the only child who got the family autism™

[loveletterworm]

unfortunate that attempting to make things of any substantial nature and put them somewhere that people can see them generally runs directly counter to having any sort of anonymity I still would really like to be making bad little games with stupid little characters because that has been my only big goal in life since i was little (very bad at fulfilling it despite it being not even that hard) but even so much as "Extremely niche micro-micro-micro-celebrity" is a fate worse than death in my eyes . But also having nobody look at anything i do is kind of sad like living in a cave so what gives

[maladaptivedaydreamsx]

as politely as I may put it.. can we please normalize putting the spoiler warning at the very top of the post, and not below the content that's likely already been consumed by the time you get to it (below all the photos/text)? 🥲

[misslobotomite]

realizing a pattern ...

[approximately12lbs-of-ducks]

For the WIP title ask game, “DSMP space AU where Tommy and Wilbur are both humans that end up with alien crewmates Techno and Philza. Wilbur is known to be human. No one knows tommy is. I’m really normal about this one”! Very curious about this :D

And also if you wanna ramble about your extended Exile AU, absolutely go ahead >:D

*cackles gleefully while rubbing hands togetehr*

SO. In this AU, Tommy is kidnapped when he’s 12. He’s abducted by alien traffickers, and manages to escape and cobble together a life for himself. Details blurry. He learns how to move in a more twitchy, stuttering fashion - kind of like a bird - smoothes out his gait so it looks like he glides more than walks, constantly dyes his hands black using a pigment he commonly finds, holds his hands so his ring and pinky fingers are tucked into his palm and then wears gloves; he also wears a mask, reflective goggles, and then a veil over all of that. He basically does a ton of stuff to obscure his form with clothing and make it so that any human features he can’t hide are altered. He has a heavy accent but knows a fair bit of one of the more common alien dialects, enough to mostly converse with ease. He manages to get hired by Techno and Phil, two aliens, on a really shifty job as an engineer for their ship. Tommy’s been working on repairing ships for a couple years and has a pretty good idea of how they run, and so his boss recommended him when Techno and Phil asked for someone skilled (and who wouldn’t be missed incase they had to. Escort him off ship if yanno what I’m saying (they’re space mercenaries because of course they are)). Tommy takes the job cause it’s even more secluded than the back rooms of a space port, and because it pays mega bucks, and because he’s still trying to find a way home (the hope has dwindled down to almost nothing now but he has to keep ahold of it because he doesn’t know how to keep going without it).

upon boarding the ship, techno and Philza introduce him to another crewmate that they mentioned but Tommy never met before getting hired. His accent is extremely heavy and he clearly knows very little of the common dialect. Tommy thinks his accent is familiar but he just can’t place it - the new crewmate is very enthusiastic and friendly, despite techno and Phil seemingly a bit nervous about the two of them interacting. Tommy is delighted to discover that the crewmate can actually bully him right back, even with his limited vocabulary. It all goes wrong, however, when the next day Phil and techno sit tommy down and introduce him to Wilbur properly. Wilbur. Who is human. Who pulls off his mask to reveal warm brown eyes with white sclera and pale, hairless flesh and eyebrows and a mop of curly brown hair and glasses that are a bit crooked with a crack in them and a smile carefully not showing teeth and Tommy just freezes. and the next few months are frustrating and heartbreaking and it’s so hard. Because Philza and techno are deathly protective of Wilbur and love him, human as he is, and have emphasized so many times tk Tommy that Wilbur will not hurt him, that Wilbur is sentientc that Wilbur is emotional, that Wilbur feels love, that Wilbur has a complex personality - and it’s affirming and it’s terrible and Tommy is far too terrified to chance revealing himself as human. He’s also far too terrified that this is a trap. Is this a shapeshifter who saw a human and learned to mimic them? If he reveals himself as human, will he be locked up and sent to another place to be sold off for experiments or exotic zoos or other even more horrifying acts? Is this Wilbur a lure to catch other humans? Is he actually human, and still a lure, selling out his compatriots? Tommy is terrified. Terrified of being caught and hurt again. is the tune he has stuck in his head a human song? If Wilbur’s human and a traitor, will he recognize the tune if Tommy hums it? Will he put together how much T’mi sounds like ‘Tommy’ with the ‘o’ removed? is this catchphrase from earth that he translated into common a popular enough phrase on earth for Wilbur to get it?

But slowly, as it becomes clear that Wilbur is human and not a traitor or faking being a human, Tommy develops a new fear. He’s drilled his humanity out of himself, he doesn’t act human any way; what if they think HE’S a shapeshifter if he reveals himself? What if Wilbur is the exception and Philza and Techno still throw him out the airlock? Can Tommy even calm himself human? Being around Wilbur makes him realize he’s lost some of his grasp on English, his first language, what used to be his only language, because he’s barely spoken it for five years and he was so young when he was taken. He doesn’t remember much history, art, culture, he doesn’t remember how politics and currency worked, he doesn’t remember geography, he doesn’t know how his own body works, he - never got a chance to learn. He had just started middle school when he was taken and had never been that dedicated to his studies, other than English because he liked stories and making them. The details of what he did learn have become fuzzy. He doesn’t remember the feeling of grass. He doesn’t remember how the glow in the dark stars were arranged on his ceiling. He doesn’t remember how to get to the corner store from his house. He doesn’t remember the lyrics to his moms favourite song. He doesn’t feel human - he let so many details go in favour of survival, and because being human meant he was in danger. Holding onto the things that made him human would have gotten him killed. But each discovery of human experiences he missed, that he forgot, that he can’t remember anymore feels like a knife being pushed into his chest. He should be able to read Wilbur easier than anything else, because they’re the same species, but it’s the same as any other alien - Tommy has to RELEARN what some of Wilbur’s body language means. Tommy doesn’t feel human anymore, and he questions what he’s even trying to go home to.

And to top it all off, Wilbur is hurt that Tommy is ‘afraid’ of him, because at first Tommy avoided him out of terror of being caught, and now out of terror that he’s not good enough to consider himself human. Phil and Techno keep on giving him disappointed looks and talks and Tommy doesn’t know how to explain that he’s not scared of Wilbur hurting him but he’s so scared of what Wilbur Represents. And also the thought thag maybe- Wilbur will reject him. Confirm Tommy’s feelings that he’s not human anymore, be disappointed he can’t bond with Tommy over being from the same planet and speaking the same language. Tommy had a very hard few months lol. After a few months he starts to warm up to Wilbur though and relax around him, thanks to Wilbur’s incessant attempts to make friends with Tommy. He’s still terrified and closed off but he starts to loosen up a bit, and finds himself feeling at home with wil, tech and Phil, and sometimes, even, safe - even though it’s constantly tainted by the guilt of keeping himself hidden.

I’ve run several different scenarios for how Tommy does get revealed to be human; he gets sick and they try to strong arm him into going through the biometric scanner (which he refuses point blank to go into of his own volition), he accidentally responds to Wilbur in English (or similar scenario if Wilbur’s like ‘(in English) what’s this word in common’ and Tommy’s like ‘(in common) it translates to ___’), the ship gets attacked and he sheds his layers for easier maneuverability and also so he can use his nails and teeth and go feral as a treat (but which ultimately reveals him as human), just a gentle admittance to Wilbur one time after Wilbjr talks about earth and Tommy can’t contain his heartbreak anymore ((oh yeah Tommy def has some good angst moments of being homesick and trying to explain to his crewmates that he can’t just go home)); none of them fully satisfy me yet though. I’ll keep running the simulations lol

[nopeferatu]

ugh.. going on the wranglers lj drives me crazy. there's sooo many of these supposed great lost fics, but honestly...of all the ones i've been sent, 271horses' have been the only ones that lived up to the hype. and they have comparatively less hype surrounding them than other ones :/

[shewassharpasthenameofneedles]

RAYMOND FROM MY FONTS???

[genderqueerdykes]

had the consult for my gallbladder surgery. the doctor told me i need to "lose 10 - 15 pounds" before they'll perform the surgery on me, and that I would need to wait 2 - 3 months before they would schedule it. i told her i have PCOS which makes it difficult to lose weight. she told me that does happen, and offered to refer me to a bariatric surgeon who is used to bigger bodies who could perform the gallbladder removal instead. i asked her for the referral to them instead

i was very angry at her for this, as 10 - 15 pounds do not make any difference when you are 300 lbs. my weight fluctuates between 280 - 340 lbs depending greatly on what i've eaten, how much i exercise, and so on. this will also vary greatly depending on if the stone is blocking my gallbladder completely or partially- if it's fully blocking the neck of my gallbladder, i cannot get enough digestive juices into my stomach to properly digest my food, so i will begin violently vomiting to get the undigested food out, and to get bile flowing into my stomach again. i begin to lose tons of weight when this happens, and i put it back on during the periods where i can get enough bile in my stomach to properly digest my food.

i can't digest my food properly. eating "healthier" will not change this- i can't digest food at all, period. healthy or unhealthy, i can't digest anything, because a good half of my digestive juices are completely missing from my guts. there is a functional issue with the way my guts work, of course i will lose weight drastically and put it back on at times. of course the issues will be episodic.

both her and the student that was working with me kept assuming that i said that my pain got worse after "high fat" meals. both of them put this in my mouth-

the student did it first. she asked when the pain gets worse and i said sporadically, but sometimes after i eat. she literally asked me "so you said it gets worse after fatty meals, right?"

i got frustrated and said "no, it's really random." i didn't get to tell her that raw leafy vegetables and lightly steamed or cooked vegetables make me vomit. broccoli and cauliflower that aren't heavily cooked, salads, raw vegetables, lightly cooked carrots, applesauce and apples in general are all problem foods.

the doctor then came in and said "it gets worse after high fat meals, right? you said that" and i went, again, "no it just kinda happens."

i don't even eat a high fat diet. i cook at home now for every meal now that i have all the tools i need to do so. i make rice, fish, pasta, and certain vegetables that i can digest like potatoes, sweet potatoes, onions, mushrooms, and so on. i eat bread, seeds, nuts, dried fruits, and drink oatmilk. i don't eat land meats, eggs, or dairy. i don't have any of those things. i do eat french fries and fish sticks, but not for every single meal. i don't eat chips because they're too salty and irritate my stomach. i don't eat candy or sweets unless the food bank delivers them to me. i don't eat much sugar other than pancakes and certain fruits

she wouldn't listen to me and went "well when you eat fatty meals, your gallbladder has to contract more and it can cause you a lot of pain." you would not believe how many times she came back to "you need to eat a lower fat diet." "the pain gets worse after you eat a high fat meal, so eat lower fat meals and your pain will go down." "just eat a lower fat diet and it'll help."

i just kind of sighed. there were tears in my eyes. i felt defeated. they made a bunch of assumptions just because i was sitting there, being fat. i was wearing long sleeves due to it being cold and they didn't get to see that i have a lot of muscle in my body mass. quite a lot. i wanted to tell them that i'm on testosterone and physically active when and where possible, and that i frequently lift heavy objects and move, but i never got a chance. i wanted to tell them my BMI isn't what they think it is, but i just didn't bother to try

i despise that people assume that fat people are fat because they eat "unhealthy" foods. i ate high fat foods for a few months while i was homeless because i didn't have the resources to cook every single meal. it affected my liver, i'm dealing with some fatty liver. but my gallbladder has more important issues in the form of the literal stone inside. she would not stop pushing for me to eat lower fat meals. all because i was sitting there, existing, as a fat person. i wish i would've told her i can only eat fish and plant matter

i don't understand how a patient telling you they're vomiting and can't keep down certain foods does not sound like a more pressing issue than an arbitrary number. weight as a number means nothing, it tells you nothing about that person's actual body composition. i have trauma with vomiting and yet i'm going to have to keep doing it anyway despite the fact that it could kill me via dehydration or if i just. can't stop

either way i'm very unhappy with result as i already waited for a month for this consult. now i have to wait for a referral for another surgeon to go through, and to do the consult with them, too. all while being in pain and having GI issues the entire time. just because a surgeon doesn't want to take the time to learn how to operate on fat bodies. i'm tired. what a joke

[stellacendia]

I've been enjoying my Spanish lessons on Duolingo for so many reasons but one of them is definitely that my confidence in speaking it has gone way, way up from where it was back when I was taking classes in high school. And one of the reasons for this, I'm finding, is that in a lot of places Spanish is literally physically easier for me to speak than my native English. Like, the way my mouth needs to move to form the proper sounds is easier than my strongly American-accented English.

I have a really hard time pronouning words that have multiple r's or an r and a w. Rural, for example, is a word I absolutely hate because it's super hard for me to say. There are others I can never quite say right but I can't think of them right now.

But tonight's Spanish lesson? It included the word librería, which I looked at and thought 'oh man I'll never get that one right' because if that was an English word I was saying in my normal accent those two r's so close together would trip me up so badly. (Just for fun I tried saying it in the most American way and I actually couldn't.) But pronouncing it with the right accent and rolled r's? Super easy! Rolls right off the tongue, is even fun to say.

There are several reasons why I chose to learn Spanish but I think my choice to return to it after so many years out of high school is this, that it's so easy for me to speak.