#category is: ships that make me fucking LOSE IT!!!!!!!!!

[apencilandpen]

i think of you more often than i'd like to admit...

[charmac]

just wanna say I agree wholeheartedly with your tags on that fandom post. I have been following sunny on here since 2015 and there is a constant cycle of sensitive, and frankly delusional people, who claim the show, make crazy headcanons and justifications to make it tolerable and acceptable to them before they eventually shun and condemn the show altogether. it was very bad in 2018 and made me withdraw from the fandom lmao. I remember being most annoyed with the endless woobifying of charlie and the absolute condemnation of dee above everyone else. like, they're all bad. that's the point of the show. I just don't understand how they could stomach it in the first place

You are a warrior, dude.

The reason it took me so long to join Sunnyblr in the first place was the fact that ~early 2020 I was rarely seeing anything here that was based in canon, mostly weird headcanons that made no sense to me, and Reddit genuinely seemed like a more based place to exist for this show.

I literally needed a friend to give me specific accounts to follow because the tag was (and, sorry, lowkey still is) a nightmare. (Though to be fair I’ve been in fandoms on Tumblr for over a decade and literally never liked scrolling tags.)

I got into Sunny and I fell in love with Sunny because of canon. Because it’s so fucking weird and fucked up but it’s FUNNY, and there’s genuinely nothing like it. The characters are horrible stupid terrible people but they’re actually deeply complex and rich to study, so much so that you feel extremely compelled in a multitude of ways to dedicate yourself to some part of them, or all parts of them. But.. if you strip them of those core identities, of what the characters stand for, that compulsion is gone, void, irrelevant.

Because it’s the extremely raw, almost purely acting on basic instinct, unfiltered humanity, worst parts of the self, inability to recognise or follow societal norms aspects of these characters that are relatable. It’s relatable in a way that *should* make you uncomfortable, feel unsettled, and maybe a little relieved that these parts of people can be acknowledged... That’s a unique and interesting feeling, something people engage with media like this to explore and expand upon, and it’s often something that genuinely helps or supports people who wrestle with a lot of the heavy concepts Sunny satirises (and sometimes just, shoves at you head on).

When people start to disregard all of this, for whatever reason they do, that’s when you end up with the Fandom using Sunny Characters as an “ability to project” or (much worse) a “near blank canvas to play with” (because, yeah, if you strip them of their literal reason for being created and continued existence, ofc you lose their whole identity!?)

The problem seems to be that either 1) they just don’t understand the show well enough to get that they’re disregarding this aspect of the plots and characters, and so they genuinely don’t recognise that the fandom for Sunny exists because of these terrible compulsions and insane trauma exploration and that’s why we enjoy discussing and playing with these characters or 2) they do understand this but they can’t engage with it without some kind of personal moral conundrum or extreme discomfort, so they have to sanitise or completely alter the characters to enjoy them.

The thing is, if you fall into category 2, you just don’t belong in the depths of it all, and it’s an unfortunate truth you have to face. If you cannot enjoy canon, if the actual show makes you extremely uncomfortable and you’re only here for a gay ship or to project your gender and sexuality onto one character, you need to go stan something else. I say that with the greatest intentions for you. As Anon here has stated, it’s an insane cycle in this fandom over and over, you’re just going to upset yourself and resent the show and the people here, because we like the canon and the fuckery because that’s what the show is for. That is the literal point of the show at the end of the day.

Now if you’re in category 1, I heavily encourage you to actually *talk to people about the show and the characters*, read analysis, watch the episodes with different frames of reference and in alternate states of mind. Do your own analysis or character work, try and just write out the plot of your favourite episode and put to words *why* you like it. Hell, try and write a fanfic or a spec script from the mind of one of the characters, even if you think you can’t write.

Honestly, honestly, honestly, if you genuinely like this show at face value but you’re only engaging with fanon because you feel like you ‘shouldn’t’ openly enjoy the canon because it’s seen as ‘bad,’ the best thing you can do is have a conversation with someone, or multiple people, who get the show.

That being said, I do wanna open this shell Discord I’ve made to people. For people who *enjoy* the canon, who want to discuss actual Sunny (and also have fun with it, of course!) you’re welcome to join.

A lot of you get it. I’ve made some amazing friends in this fandom and regularly have extremely stimulating and insanely throught provoking convos with the people I’ve met here. I love it, it drives my insane passion for this show and I am eternally grateful to have found people who love this show for what it is. I hope, if you’re struggling to figure out why you like this show or struggling to accept that you like media like Sunny, you reach out or join a conversation and learn to love it too. And if you don’t, if you genuinely hate the canon of this show and only like the version of Macdennis you saw in a dozen different Tiktok edits to Taylor Swift songs, I really hope you move on for your own sake.

[brekk3red]

On Lizzie and Tommy Shelby

☆ A Yapping Session ☆

Notes: I've recently finished the last episode of Peaky Blinders and I have so much on my mind regarding the relationship between Lizzie and Thomas. There simply isn't enough content online to accommodate for my internet surfing, so I'll post my thoughts on here instead, mainly about why I don't think the ship would ever work out. Spoilers and (probably) many grammatical errors after the cut!

It isn't that I don't want to like Lizzie x Tommy - in fact, I was on my knees the entire show praying that they would work out. Eventually, though, I lose hope seeing their relationship struggle to move beyond a painful, one-sided love for the majority of the entire show (except towards the end, but more on that later). It gets to a point where they need a miracle to work.

I should also mention Grace. To me, her significance in the show seems greater when she's dead than alive. I didn't even think that she would make an appearance again after season 1, and that her role is to solidify the distrust Thomas has in others (caused by their entanglements followed by her betrayal). I don't dislike her at all, but I don't think I ever got the chance to truly invest myself in her story before she is already killed. What the show stresses most is the impact her death leaves on Thomas. He is tortured by grief, self-blame, guilt, etc.. So while I don't care much for Grace x Tommy, it's not difficult to see that Thomas will never love anyone as much as he loves Grace.

As for Lizzie, she is who Thomas turns to after Grace's death. They haven't had much of a romantic history beforehand, but a sexual one turned professional when he offers her a job as his secretary (I will try to avoid recounting everything in the show lest this gets boring). During this time, Lizzie acts as his emotional crutch. This doesn't mean much, just that he uses her body to distract himself from the grieving of his late wife. Although he is the one to promise her complete exemption from her past job as a prostitute, he breaks that promise once at the Derby race, then again by basically treating her like one to cope with the loss of his wife. The only difference now is that she is exclusive to Thomas, almost willingly so because she harbours feelings for him.

Their sexual relationship continues throughout the seasons, and he turns to her once more when memories of Greta (pre-war Thomas' lover) resurfaces. So really, up to this point, there isn't a time when he has sex with Lizzie, with Lizzie in mind.

Lizzie's pregnancy prompts their marriage due to the stigmas surrounding children born of wedlock at the time, so it obviously isn't out of love. Nothing particular changes afterwards and Lizzie remains a long shot from ever comparing to Grace. I probably will go back to this topic a lot, but the difference between Thomas’ interactions with Grace contrary to other women is huge. Their sex scenes (often in slow-motion with backing music, etc.) is exceptionally intimate in contrast to the furniture-thumping, lustful fucking he has with prostitutes. Lizzie unfortunately falls into the latter category. Where even well into their marriage, she has to personally demand they do it on the bed.

That whole episode really stands out to me regarding their relationship. Thomas has no qualms in bedding other women while married to her, and Lizzie knows this. Yet she only goes as far as to forbid him from doing it in their own home and not within a day of holding their daughter’s hand (I think). It’s pitiful and only gets worse when Thomas drops the statement that she is “his property” and no one else may touch her. That sounds like something younger me would read on Wattpad and giggle and kick my feet (shame on me), but there is nothing commendable or romantic about this. While Lizzie has to negotiate against his cheating, he brazenly chalks her up as an asset in his inventory, like he would a car or a horse. Possessiveness also isn't love (‼️). There is a clear power imbalance in their dynamics; Lizzie is never in control, Thomas is. He almost never listens to anyone, let alone her. It is always him who makes the decisions and she could argue all she wants but inevitably, she would have to be the one to submit.

More specifically about Thomas' infidelity, I would understand if he has sex with other women for the sake of furthering his plans, such as with Jessie. After all, he isn't in love with Lizzie or their political marriage, so it wouldn't burden him to cheat on her if it means that he gets what he wants logically. However, he doesn't just do that. He hires prostitutes and speaks to Lizzie within the span of seconds and doesn't bat an eye. At some point even basic respect is lacking in their relationship, a relationship that Lizzie has been so loyal to, yet she is constantly met with nothing but humiliation. She holds the title of being his wife, but what supports it other than some rings and legal documents?

Heading towards the last few episodes, Thomas strives to change his ways due to false news about his impending death. He becomes more considerate of Lizzie, shows his care more often and more openly, but their relationship couldn't be salvaged with the given time constraints. At some point, Thomas says "I love you" for what is probably the first time. The way I see it, though, is that he is pushing himself to love her because he knows that is what she wants, what will make her happy. It couldn't, and doesn't work, especially given the short time they have. Even if what he says is true, Lizzie ends up leaving him.

I like this ending. Thomas is right when he says that she deserves better. My gorgeous, breath-taking, soul-stealing queen does deserve better than him and it's about time they let go of whatever relationship they have. While Thomas cares for Lizzie immensely, their relationship is more toxic than not and he ultimately couldn't give her what she needs and deserves after all these years. Sometimes things don't work out and that's okay. I hope that they do not return to each other in the movie (if it comes out), but find separate, better lives for themselves.

Notes: that is all of my late night rant, i may just be spewing nonsense atp so do tell me if i've gotten anything wrong or if you have different takes on these topics. thank yew (❁´◡`❁)

[ultravioletqueen]

I received some anonymous asks related to my last post, in which they said things like how not everyone has a sibling relationship like mine, that Andrew and Ashley came out like that because they had negligent parents, that I shouldn't watch the game, etc.

First: my experience with my own family shows that even with a good childhood, siblings can become codependent without needing to suffer abuse.

second: saying that Andrew and Ashley turned out like this because they had negligent parents is like saying that everyone who had parents like that wants to fuck their siblings or relatives, which is a disgusting generalization.

and third: just because I like the game does not mean that I cannot criticize it or its fandom (which has a sector that romanticizes incest the most), every product is made to be criticized whether you like it or not.

I understand that I may have expressed myself poorly in the previous post, but my point remains: that they made us choose the incestuous route after two hours of playing seems very forced to me.

I'm not against incest in fiction as long as it's shown as bad.

but i have to admit that the game doesn't normalize incest: renee's reaction to the idea, the fact that there were rumors about andrew and ashley in their teens, and ashley admitting that she doesn't see andrew that way (if ashley promises her to Andrew that they will never be like that) and that she would only go to that extreme for Andrew to stay with her shows that they are aware that it is wrong.

The fact that they want to shove incest down our throats before that moment makes it lose some value but shows that they recognize to some extent that the thoughts they have are not normal, but they decide to ignore it or they don't care (Ashley goes more into this category while Andrew is more discreet).

In conclusion: I have the right to criticize what I don't like about the game and that shouldn't be anyone's business (especially those who ship gravecest).

(Español)

recibi unos mensajes anonimos relacionados con mi ultima publicacion, en el que decian cosas como de que no todos tienen una relacion de hermanos como la mia, que andrew y ashley salieron asi por haber tenido padres negligentes, que no deberia ver el juego, etc.

primero:mi experiencia con mi propia familia muestra que incluso con una buena infancia los hermanos pueden salir codependientes sin necesidad de sufrir negligencia o abuso.

segundo:decir que Andrew y ashley salieron asi por haber tenido padres negligentes es como decir que todos los que tuvieron padres asi se quieren coger a sus hermanos o familiares, lo que es una generalizacion bastante desagradable.

y tercero: que me guste el juego no significa que no pueda criticarlo o a su fandom(que tiene un sector que son quiénes mas romantizan el incesto), todo producto esta hecho para ser criticado quieras o no.

entiendo que me pude expresar mal en la anterior publicación, pero mi punto permanece:que nos hayan hecho escoger la ruta incestuosa tras dos horas de juego me parece muy forzado.

no estoy en contra del incesto en la ficción siempre y cuando se lo muestre como algo malo.

pero debo admitir que el juego no normaliza el incesto:la reaccion de renee ante la idea, el hecho de que hubo rumores sobre andrew y ashley en su adolescencia y de que ashley admita que no ve a andrew de esa manera (si ashley le promete a andrew que nunca serán asi) y que solo llegaria a ese extremo para que andrew se quede con ella muestra que son conscientes de que esta mal.

el hecho de que nos quieran meter el incesto por la garganta antes de ese momento hace que pierda algo de valor pero muestra que reconocen hasta cierto punto que los pensamientos que tienen no son normales, pero deciden ignorarlo o no les importa(ashley entra mas en esta categoria mientras que andrew es mas discreto).

en conclusión:estoy en mi derecho de criticar lo que no me gusta del juego y eso no deberia ser de la incumbencia de nadie(especialmente de los que shipean gravecest).

[tempkiriri]

Tiger & Bunny Week (Day 1)

Technically I'm late but uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

April 2: Favorite Character, Episode, Movie, and/or Song

Most people seem to be doing them all, but I'll be skipping movie since there's only 2 of them.

Favourite Character:

MY CRINGEFAIL SON IVAN!!!! I relate to him immensely, even his dynamic with Edward I'd say I can somewhat relate to with someone in my life. It's uncanny. He tries his best to be outgoing but anxiety and self esteem issues sure are fucking bitches, so he can only really do it behind a mask. Even in S2 whilst his whole outlook may have taken a bit of a rollback, that's honestly realistic, not everyone can just keep marching and continuously improving themselves, there are setbacks and holes you can fall into at times. I wish we knew more about his personal life beyond his backstory of getting bullied as a child + what vague stuff we have of his hero academy days, a lot of heroes suffer from this, however. His passion for his hobbies is also just like me. He's cringe but he is free, just like many of us wish to be. Runner up is Keith I love the Autistic dog man

Favourite Episode:

I gotta go with Sky's The Limit. The title is a very OH GEE WHOS FOCUS EPISODE IS THIS kind but genuinely it doesn't prepare you for the content. There's a wholeass lore drop, an intense fight scene with a robot, and of course Keith being Keith. It also puts into focus just how much pressure heroes are put under when it comes to the rankings, and second place apparently not being enough for Poseidon Line is a very corporate reality. It's go big or go home. The ending is also like OH MY GOD IM CRYING???? Like, we know Cis isn't very capable of behaving like a human, but Keith doesn't realise she's not human at all, he treats her as any other person and falls harder than an anvil for her despite their short time in contact. It makes me think that Cis had a potential to be something, someone more than she was initially made for. And these two are a bit of a guilty pleasure ship that me and like 2 other people in the west side seem to ship and yes I will be taking those "Keith is still lowkey in love with her even in S2 era" crumbs thank you-

Favourite Song:

Oh shit this is where it gets tricky. I have so many, so I'll split it into categories:

OP: Earth Diver ED: Pilot Character Song: GHHHAAAAAA DONT MAKE ME CHOOOOOSE Other supplementary Song: Orion Wo Nazoru Hero Cover

I can't really put to words for Earth Diver, but I really like how it starts and kinda soothes you into the song before it really kicks. The lyrics are also very passionately sung.

I really like the calmer tone of Pilot and even though the explicitness of the shippyness isn't as heavy as Aida, the subtlety honestly fits them more. The credits themselves are also just beautiful; the visual aspect of them hits immensely hard in ep 14 especially since you saw what could happen to their suits in the fight the episode prior, and they're both no longer in their prime. Closing it out as they stare at the sunset makes me emotional and Proud Fiesta I love you but goddamn why did you return for Episode 25 that was a fucking mood killer I stg.

I love a lot of the character songs, with the ones from Best Of Hero very enjoyable romps, especially Mikirezakura and Thanks and Thanks Again, the energy these two songs have makes you wanna coreograph something. Some other highlights are POWER OF JUSTICE and Aaa Hero Suit. (Also Hidden Heroism actually kinda sucks it tries to be Mikirezakura 2 and thus loses out on an identity of its own which is very disappointing).

I love the harmony of the heroes cover of Orion, I can really picture them all in recording booths singing next to each other...who's the cheering guy, though? I've listened to this cover so many times and the line the cheering guy seemingly sings just sounds like Hirata's Kotetsu, I don't get it. I get wanting to balance the lyrics between groups and characters evenly but that was an awkward way to do it.

[fandom-scatteredthoughtsonpaper]

Announcing a fandom community server!

Hi, guys! This is sorta directed at my followers but also Obey Me fans (and other fandom people).

I mentioned, like, a looong time ago I wanted to do a community server, but I didn't really understand how to use Discord, but since then I've been in a zine, a few collabs, and hosted my own collabs (currently running one for Lucifer 👀). So, I have the experience and knowledge of running a server now!

My urge to create a fandom-centric server has really bloomed and after sitting on the it for a year, I feel confident enough yet still anxious to release a link of an invitation to it (found at the bottom)! It's still fresh, and bots haven't been implemented yet, but I really want to push this out.

I myself am in a lot of different fandoms, obviously Obey Me, but also Baldur's Gate, Stardew Valley, Kingdom Hearts, Persona games, What in Hell is Bad, a few obscure fandoms (like Alien Stage and Touchstarved) and older ones (Homestuck), so I have all the intentions to have this server be inclusive to webcomics, anime and manga and adjacent media, games from standard video games to phone games, graphic novels, books, otome and romance stuff, indie media like web series, cartoons, and games, and more as it grows.

I also want this server to be a hub for writers and artists to share their stuff they're too awkward or anxious to post and receive feedback, and as a place to get to know fellow-minded people in shared fandoms. AUs, theories, headcanons, crossovers, self-inserts, your MCs/OCs - all allowed!

A few things to note:

This is a fandom community server, but it might start out as Obey Me heavy because I'm trying to direct attention to that fandom since that's the one I am mostly in and participated in most things as a fan.

Adults and minors (16+) are allowed, but there are rules implemented that divide channels into SFW and NSFW categories and channels.

Writers, artists, content creators, cosplayers, fans that dabble, etc. are enthusiastically welcomed

The server can also function with channels regarding roleplays and self-publishing (commissions, Etsy shops, etc.)

I really want this server to kinda be a central spot for small fandoms or dying fandoms (like Obey Me) or old fandoms or growing fandoms and ones in-between basically non-existent and probably way too big. I want the server to be a community of different fandoms and the people that incorporate them, and I want it to be a fun place to just either relax with other fans and share works you like or works you've made or as a place to just dip in a silently lurk to look at what people are talking about or look at what is shared or as a place to lose your fucking minds when updates happen or something wild or devastating in the media occurs.

I want this to be a respectful but enjoyable place to come to and join and feel like you can invite friends or maybe even make friends!

Hard rules:

Before entering though, the server has a soft screening process for people to join.

Verifications will be done by me to make sure no one with ill intentions has a chance to cause harassment or harm to members. Fandoms can be toxic and mean in public places like here and Twitter, but this server will be, to the best of my ability, a space away from that.

Absolutely no pedophilic content is allowed. Like, none. It'll be one of the fastest things to get you kicked and banned and blacklisted.

There are rules and specific channels for certain ships and certain explicit content that can be talked about in the server if there are any questions.

This server is for fandom communities and politics and religious hot takes are not applicable here. This is a designated relief zone and none of that is really welcome.

I think that mostly covers the sales pitch and important stuff, lol.

So with all that out of the way--

Link to join: https://discord.com/invite/g8VeSe4t

[sephirthoughts]

Just Like Honey: Chapter 9

SOMEONE PHOTOSHOP GLASSES ONTO A PICTURE OF REEVE PLEASE I NEED IT FOR REASONS

AU: organized crime, cabaret, sex work

SHIPS: MULTIPLE! rufus/cloud, vincent/cloud, sephiroth/cloud, reeve/cloud, rufus/cloud/tseng, cloud/other characters as clients because that's his job, weiss/nero, background aerti

RATING: EXPLICIT, MINORS DNI, NO MINORS ALLOWED

WARNINGS: sex workers, prostitution

Chapter 9: Friends in High Places

Leslie and Cloud’s old tenement apartment and Reeve’s Shinra Tower penthouse represented the bookends of residential living situations in Midgar. Expansive didn’t begin to describe Reeve’s place, and the entirety of it had clearly been furnished by a professional decorator. 

Overworked, oblivious Reeve probably didn’t even notice how gorgeous the mahogany bookshelves were, or how supple the calfskin leather on the couches, or how thick and plushy the hand-woven Persian rugs. To him, this palatial residence was a box he went into, once in a while, to sleep and shower.

In all fairness, Cloud hardly noticed, either, because Reeve answered the door wearing a cable knit, v-neck sweater, grey slacks, and a pair of—

“Glasses!” Cloud gasped, pointing accusingly at Reeve’s face. “And you didn’t even warn me!”

“Uh…sorry. Do you not like them?” said the understandably confused Reeve, reaching up, to take them off. 

“Nuh-uh! Don’t you dare!” 

Cloud kicked the door shut behind him, dropped his bag, and grabbed Reeve, dragging him into a kiss. Reeve was too startled to react for a second, then he gave a soft groan and leaned into it, letting his hands roam hungrily over Cloud’s taut little body, as they fumbled their way to the sofa and fell onto it, without breaking the kiss.

“I guess—I guess you like the glasses, then,” Reeve said breathlessly, when Cloud released him. 

“No fucking way, they’re flat-out cheating!” Cloud complained. “You’re already that hot, and you really have the nerve to pull out the sexy-dad glasses and sweater look? Rules violation, unfair play!”

Reeve chuckled. “Wow. No one’s ever said I look like a dad before.”

“Maybe not to your face. I bet a lot of little Shinra employees call you daddy behind your back.”

“You’re making me sound a lot more attractive than I really am. Trust me, there’s no way anyone at work thinks of me that way.”

“Oh, no. It’s just as I feared,” Cloud lamented, cupping Reeve’s face in his hands. “Overwork has fried your brain, and you’re living in a delusion where you’re not one of the sexiest men alive.”

“W—what?” Reeve stammered. “I’m not even close to one of the sexiest men alive. Especially not when men like you exist.”

“We don’t count.”

“Oh?”

“Yep. In the interest of fairness, athletic twinks have our own separate category. Otherwise, all other men would always lose to us.”

Reeve laughed again. “Well, you’re not wrong about that.”

Cloud couldn’t help but smile, too. “You’re a lot happier when you’re not in that stuffy office. Speaking of which, I’m gonna go change into something a little more comfortable. That ok?”

“Yes, please. Make yourself at home. The bathroom is the third door, there. Can I get you something to drink?”

“Yeah, anything’s fine. Whatever you’re drinking.”

When Cloud returned from the bathroom, Reeve choked on his sip of wine, coughing and sputtering into a napkin. “Holy—holy shit! You can’t say I’m cheating, when you’re wearing that!”

“What, this old thing?” Cloud said innocently, while doing a little twirl, to demonstrate that the pink-lace short-shorts laced up in the back, with a pink ribbon. With the matching camisole and slippers, he was basically dressed like he was playing a teenaged girl in a naughty sleepover porn. 

“You said you wanted the girlfriend experience, so I dressed accordingly.”

“If I had a girlfriend who dressed like that, I’d never leave the house,” Reeve muttered. 

“So, what do you feel like doing tonight, honey-bunny?” Cloud crooned, accepting the glass of white wine Reeve was holding out to him. “Want to snuggle up on the couch and pretend to watch a movie?”

“I, uh…yeah. That sounds good,” Reeve said awkwardly.

“Or, how about I give you a neck rub, and you tell me about your day.”

“Sure.”

Cloud narrowed his eyes. “Don’t just agree to whatever I say. I’m here to make you happy. If there’s something you want, I want to hear it.”

“No, no I don’t—well, maybe. Ok, yes. But it’s kind of…embarrassing.” 

“Good news. If there’s anyone you don’t need to be embarrassed telling about it, it’s me. You’re the one who told me sex workers are like therapists. So, treat me like that. A safe space.”

“Hoo boy.” Reeve passed a hand across his forehead. “It’s just, I know it probably isn’t a cool fantasy to have, and I’d never want to do anything like that in real life, I just—”

“Hey,” Cloud interrupted, taking his hand to squeeze it. “Every kind of fantasy is ok. It doesn’t matter what you get turned on by. It doesn’t make you a bad person.”

Reeve looked unconvinced. “Are you…are you sure?”

“I’m sure. You could tell me you daydream about fucking cartoon hedgehogs, and I still wouldn’t judge you. As long as it’s just fantasy, or you express it as part of consensual play between adults, literally anything is ok.”

“Well…alright.” Reeve took a deep breath and let it out. “Here goes. I would like it if you could pretend to…to be asleep, while I touch you and…do things to you.”

Cloud blinked. “Is that really what you were worried about telling me? Then it’s no sweat, I’ve done plenty of somno play.”

“Somno?”

“Somnophilia. Wanting to fuck someone who’s unconscious.” 

“Oh. Wow. I didn’t know there was a real term, for it. But there’s more. I—I also want you to ‘wake up’ partway through, while I’m already inside you, and, uh…”

“You want me to struggle? Beg you to stop? I can cry, if you want.”

Reeve squinted an eye at him. “You’re not nearly as weirded out by this as I expected.”

“Reeve, my sweet, summer wolfman,” Cloud sighed, patting his shoulder. “This is one of the least weird things I’ve been asked to do.”

“Really? Wait, wolfman?”

“Yeah, really. I had a client once who wanted me to soak in a cold bath, first, and play dead while he fucked me. I got a married couple who wanted me to pretend to be their kid, and walk in on them fucking. One wanted to be a new stepmother, and I was the horny stepson who took advantage of her, while dad was out of town. I have multiple current clients who like to be put on leashes and treated like dogs. I even have these four brothers who make me cook food for the three younger ones, then the older one fucks me in another room, while they eat.”

Reeve looked appropriately astonished. “My thing probably sounds pretty tame, then.”

“Non-con fantasies like that are the most common ones, believe it or not. But I’ve done pretty much everything. Power exchange, age play, pet play, teacher-student, coach-athlete, voyeurism, incest…”

“Incest?”

“Yeah, mostly daddy and big brother stuff.”

Reeve swallowed hard. “Would you…would you call me daddy?”

“Try and stop me.”

A little while later, Cloud was ‘asleep’ in Reeve’s huge, ridiculously comfortable bed, with the lights out, and the only illumination coming from the windows. The door opened softly, letting a beam of warm light from the hallway fall across the bed.

He heard Reeve call out, “Sweetheart? You awake?”

Cloud didn’t reply, obviously.

Cautious footsteps padded across the carpet, to the bed. He was lying on his stomach, hugging a pillow, with his legs splayed out and one knee bent, so when the covers were drawn back, the first thing Reeve saw was the pink lace of the tiny shorts, barely concealing the bulge of his sack, between his thighs. 

A knee pressed down on the bed, then big, warm hands slid up under the shorts, to gently cup his ass. Reeve’s thumb hooked the crotch and pulled them to the side, and the other thumb and forefinger spread him apart.

Cloud heard him curse under his breath and grinned inwardly. Covering his asshole, was a sparkling, pink, heart-shaped gem, which was the base of the plug he was wearing, and hadn’t told Reeve about. 

There was a short pause, then Reeve’s warm weight pressed down on him, as he leaned over to whisper in his ear. “Playing with yourself in daddy’s bed. I’ll have to teach you a lesson.” 

The scent of wine on his breath, mingled with Reeve’s aftershave, really did lend to the atmosphere of a slightly drunk parental figure, about to do unspeakable things to a sleeping teenager. Cloud’s dick began to swell and thicken, with excitement.

Reeve slipped his pink shorts down, leaving them hanging around his ankle, and slid a palm under his abdomen, to pull his half-hard dick down between his thighs. There was another pause, in which Cloud could hear Reeve’s uneven breathing. Then the hands took hold of his ass again. 

It was only because of his extreme professionalism, at that point, that Cloud was able to remain still and unresponsive, breathing relatively evenly. Reeve’s beard tickled his inner thighs as he bent down and put his hot mouth on Cloud’s sack, sucking and licking, while his thumb rhythmically prodded the plug. Pretty soon, Cloud’s dick was rock-hard, despite being forced to point downward between his thighs.

Reeve drew away, then took hold of the jeweled base of the plug and began to pull. Cloud stirred slightly and made a drowsy murmur of protest, as it popped out, with an obscene squelch. A thin stream of clear lube trickled down over his balls. 

“Got yourself all ready for daddy, didn’t you,” Reeve said hoarsely. 

Cloud heard a belt and zipper, and the rustle of fabric. Reeve guided the head of his cock to Cloud’s taut, lube-slick entrance. 

“Fuck, baby. Your pussy’s so tight,” he breathed, as he pushed in. “Daddy can barely fit inside you.” 

Cloud was about ready to explode. His dick was throbbing and drooling, and it took all his self control not to moan from sheer relief, when Reeve finally bottomed out, filling him to the brim. Cloud waited for him to set a good rhythm, then he began to stir, and groggily lifted his head.

“What…what’s happening,” he mumbled. Then he froze and pretended to panic. “What are you doing! Stop! Help!” 

Reeve grabbed his wrists and pinned them, as he began to sob and thrash. “Sh, sh, sh. It’s just me, sweetheart.”

“D—daddy?” Cloud sniffled. “Why are you…why are you doing this to me?”

“Isn’t this what you wanted? You were playing with yourself, in my bed, weren’t you?”

“I didn’t! I wasn’t—!”

“Don’t lie to me,” Reeve cut him off sternly, punctuating the sentence with a savage thrust. The uncustomary aggressiveness in his voice amplified his sexiness by about ten-thousand, and sent chills up cloud’s spine. “Daddy came home and found you asleep in my bed, with a toy stuck up your slutty little hole. Weren’t you playing with yourself and thinking about daddy fucking you?”

“Hngh—ah! I was! I was!” Cloud ‘confessed.’ “I’m sorry, daddy! I won’t do it again!” 

Reeve slid almost all the way out. “It’s too late for that. You wanted daddy’s dick, so now you have to take it.” He slammed it back in, all the way to the base. 

“Noooo! Daddy, it’s too big!” Cloud whined, pretending to struggle under Reeve’s solid weight.

“Don’t fight, baby. Be good and take it,” Reeve panted, thrusting even harder, as Cloud bucked against him. His cock was getting hotter and harder. He was close. “You’re gonna make daddy come, if you keep tightening up like that.”

“Daddy, s—stop! It feels weird!” Cloud wailed (while gleefully tilting his ass up to take Reeve’s dick as deep as he could).

“Hngh…baby! Daddy’s coming! Fuck!” 

Reeve pulled out abruptly, and Cloud felt warm fluid spattering across his ass and thighs. As soon as he’d finished, he pushed back inside, to ride out the spasms, while Cloud wrung himself hard and fast, till he came in the tight space, between his stomach and the mattress.

“Oh, fuck,” Reeve said breathlessly, falling onto the bed next to him. “That was—that was amazing. You’re amazing.”

“Not so bad yourself, daddy,” Cloud said, with a wink. Then he pretended to pout. “You’re not tired already, are you?”

“Not yet. Thank the goddess for all that boxing. Just, uh…just give your old man a couple minutes.”

They rolled around for a while, flirting and laughing, and wound up fucking again, with Cloud on top, riding Reeve cowgirl style. After that, they took a long shower together, in Reeve’s enormous spa-style Swiss shower. Reeve wanted to walk him out, but Cloud waved him off, saying he was a big boy and could take care of himself. And so the two cheerfully said goodnight at Reeve’s door, promising to see each other again, soon.

When the elevator reached the lobby, Cloud peered around, half expecting to see Zack, or Reno and Rude, but no one was around except for a few security guards and holographic receptionists. The scene was less desolate, outside, since this part of Shinra Tower was a block from Loveless Avenue, and the nightlife was always lively.

Cloud was crossing the bustling fountain square, bound for the train station, when a hand fell heavily on his shoulder, giving him a jolt. “I see you’ve been making friends in…high places.” 

Cloud attempted to swallow in a suddenly dry throat. “Sephi? W—what are you doing here?”

“I might ask the same of you, if I didn’t know perfectly well, already.” Sephiroth leaned close, so Cloud could feel his breath on his ear. “There’s a man’s scent, all over you.”

His voice was hard and cold and crystal clear. Like knives made of ice. Which meant he was sober, and thus at his most dangerous. Cloud suppressed a shudder.

A gloved hand took hold of his arm, and Sephiroth deftly steered him around the corner, onto the intersecting street. He glanced anxiously about, but he wasn’t thinking of calling for help. His fear was less that Sephiroth would hurt him, and more that he’d hurt other people. He didn’t want anyone to get killed, so the only choice he had was to go along with the man, and hope he’d stay calm.  

They walked for about half a block, before Sephiroth pushed him into a dark, narrow space between buildings and shoved him up against the brick wall, pinning him with a hand on the back of his neck and a knee between his legs. 

“I don’t think you quite understand your situation, little puppet, so I will explain it.” Sephiroth lowered his voice to a menacing murmur. “You belong to me. The fact that you are able to run about and do as you please, is because I allow it.”

“It’s my job, Sephi. It’s not like I can just—”

“Hush. If I objected to your waywardness, I would put a stop to it, but I do not. It amuses me, the way you play these fools like perfectly tuned instruments. The way you make them line up to lay riches at your feet, in exchange for a taste of your body. You have given yourself to so many men, and yet none of them can truly possess you. They are your servants and playthings. You are free.” 

“B—but you just said I belong to you,” Cloud faltered.

“That does not mean I intend to cage you. You would wither in captivity, and you would hate me. I would rather…but that is not what I’ve come to talk about. I sought you out because you are in a position to be useful to me. You are going to be my eyes inside Shinra.”

Shit. Cloud’s stomach dropped. “What do you mean? Why me?”

“There is no chance you would travel regularly to Shinra Tower for an ordinary client, and even less chance an ordinary client could dispatch the Turks, to transport you, to and fro. That means your clearance must grant you upper-level access.” 

Cloud was stunned that Sephiroth knew all of that, but he didn’t dare ask how. He also didn’t think his usual tactic of playing dumb was going to do much good, so he just kept his mouth shut.

Sephiroth slapped something onto the wall, in front of his face. It was a creased and faded photo, of a pretty young woman, with brown eyes and light-brown hair. 

“Who’s she?” Cloud asked, confused.

“Irrelevant. All you need to know is that she is somewhere in Shinra Tower. Memorize her face. You will look for her, for me. Tell me, immediately, the moment you see her. That’s all. Simple enough, yes?”

“Seph, this…I can’t just go snooping around in there. What if I get caught?”

“I trust you can use your talents to talk your way out of any minor trouble you encounter. But if it truly came to life or death, you’ve no need to fear. I will come to your rescue.”

“Oh, you will? And how the hell are you gonna rescue me, inside Shinra Tower?” Cloud demanded, his blue eyes sparking defiantly.

Sephiroth answered with a cold chuckle. “There are few places in this world that can keep me out.”

“If it’s so easy for you to get in, then why don’t you look for this woman, yourself? What do you need me for?” 

“The time has not yet come, to move openly, against Shinra. For now, I must stay in the shadows.” His grip tightened on the back of Cloud’s neck. “I trust my little puppet will do his very best, for me.”

“I—I will,” Cloud gasped, as Sephiroth pressed him into the wall with his body, and his hard dick dug into his ass. “You know I’ll—ngh! You know I’ll do whatever you say.”

Sephiroth gave a pleased hum, then grabbed his hair and yanked his head back. Cloud’s mouth opened readily, to submit to the invasion, as the man’s tongue rolled forcefully over his.

He didn’t like being suddenly grabbed on the street and ordered around, but being near Sephiroth for any length of time had an intoxicating effect on him. No matter how insane and dangerous his rational mind knew Sephiroth was, Cloud’s body always wanted him so badly he could taste it.

That raw, animal desire was even more intense now, away from his workplace, and without the context of a professional transaction. He was already fumbling to undo his own trousers and yank them down around his thighs, as they kissed feverishly. He heard steel buttons jingle faintly behind him, then that huge, heavy dick slotted into the cleft of his ass. 

“My bag,” he panted, licking his kiss-bruised lips. “There’s lube.”

Keeping a hand on his hip, Sephiroth reached down and picked up the bag. Cloud dug out the bottle of lubricant, which he squeezed all over his hand, then reached back to slick the thick, hard, veiny shaft. That was all the preparation Sephiroth had the patience for. He pushed the big, blunt head against his hole, still pink and swollen from Reeve, and impaled him, in one long slide, clamping a gloved hand over Cloud’s mouth, to muffle his moans. 

Once he was all the way in, he set a ruthless pace, showing no tenderness, whatsoever; thrusting hard and deep, pounding Cloud into the cold bricks. The way Sephiroth fucked was always pretty rough, but this felt different. Possessive and domineering, with a hostile edge. Like he was trying to fuck Reeve out of him (despite the fact that Reeve was a gentleman and hadn’t come inside, and Cloud had already showered, anyway). 

Just then, a wave of Sephiroth’s aromatic, masculine scent, like leather and cedar smoke, washed over him, and made Cloud’s head spin like he was drunk. He let go and lost himself in the unhinged lust and brutal intensity, radiating like heat from this monstrously strong and preternaturally gorgeous man. 

That massive shaft was drilling into him, thrumming over his prostate, making his dick so hard it ached, and was leaking like a faucet. He wanted to come so badly, he didn’t care about anything else, let alone the fact that they were outdoors, in a public alleyway, only a few meters from a busy street.

Biting his bottom lip, he looked over his shoulder at Sephiroth, and grabbed hold of his leather coat, tugging him closer, urging him to fuck him harder. 

Sephiroth’s slit pupils dilated visibly in his pale, blue-green irises. He clamped his hand over Cloud’s mouth again, and with a low snarl, he bared his sharp teeth and bit into his neck, so deep it broke the skin. 

Cloud went rigid, screaming hoarsely into Sephiroth’s muffling glove, while he came hard, spurting against the wall, in hot, rapid pulses. Sephiroth came at the same time, with a strangled groan, hips stuttering, as his big, thick shaft pulsed, pumping a molten hot flood into Cloud’s convulsing hole. 

The gloved hand released his mouth. Cloud’s head lolled forward and he let his sweat-damp forehead rest on the cold brick, enjoying the soothing coolness, while he caught his breath. Sephiroth was breathing hard too, still holding him pinned, but more gently, now, pressing what felt like apologetic kisses to the badly bruised spot on his neck. 

When he pulled out, he held Cloud open with his thumbs, to watch the semen trickle down his thighs, which seemed to please him immensely. Cloud wrinkled his nose in annoyance, but he was facing the wall still, so Sephiroth didn’t see. 

It really was incredibly rude of him to come inside, considering Cloud still had to ride the train for an hour to get home. He was thinking irritably about that and zipping up his pants, when the roar of a motorcycle engine filled the air, amplified by echoing off all the walls in the small alleyway. 

“Come,” a much subdued and unusually lucid-looking Sephiroth said, holding out his gloved hand. “I’ll take you home.”

Kadaj was waiting on the street, astride one of the gang’s huge, black motorcycles. When he saw them step out of the alleyway together, he dismounted and stood there sullenly, looking at the ground. Sephiroth threw his long leg over the saddle and Cloud climbed on, behind him. Without so much as a glance at his younger brother, Sephiroth instructed Cloud to hang on tight, then gunned the engine and sped away, down the street.

Kadaj lifted his pale-blue eyes and glared venomously after them, his fists clenching and unclenching, at his sides, till they faded from sight. Then he turned and walked away, in the opposite direction. 

Atop the roof of one of the many brownstone residential buildings, that filled this area, another figure leaned out and peered down the street, in the direction Sephiroth and Cloud rode off, then the direction Kadaj went. Then it also vanished into the night.

When they pulled up in front of the Honeybee, Cloud clambered off the bike, and hung his arms around Sephiroth’s neck, while they shared a slow, lingering kiss. Even after they drew apart, Sephiroth gazed at him for a long time, tucking his hair behind his ear and stroking his face, like he was reluctant to let him go. 

Cloud’s cheeks got hot and his stomach fluttered. He’d never felt so much like Sephiroth was actually looking at him and seeing him, before. There was something lonely and longing in the man’s eerily beautiful eyes, that made made Cloud’s chest ache. 

His own eyes began to sting with impending tears. Then all at once, it was as if a wall of ice snapped up between them. The catlike eyes glittered and the line of that perfect mouth hardened.

“Go,” Sephiroth said, turning away. “Don’t forget to do what I told you.”

Cloud stood there looking dazed, as the motorcycle roared away, down the narrow street. Then he shook himself and hurried inside. He almost ran face-first into Nero, who was standing directly in the doorway, for some reason. 

“What the hell!” Cloud said crossly. “Why are you always blocking every door I go through!”

“Who was that man, on the chopper?” Nero asked. “It can’t be…does our little bimbo have a boyfriend?”

Cloud wanted to tell him to fuck off, but asshole or no, Nero worked here, now. He should know about the hazards he might encounter. “That was Sephiroth, the leader of the Remnants biker gang. He’s psychotic and dangerous as fuck and I don’t want to die, so I do whatever he says. If he comes here, we all do whatever he says, and don’t give him an excuse to kill anyone. You can ask Andrea, if you don’t believe me.”

“It didn’t look like you were scared for your life, just now. It looked like you were kissing your boyfriend goodbye.” Nero sniffed the air and smirked. “And you smell like you just fucked in an alley.” 

“How could you possibly smell an alley?” Cloud retorted. “You’re just saying any shit you can think of, to be insulting.”

Nero arched a black brow. “Am I wrong?” 

Cloud blushed guiltily and scowled to cover it up. “It’s none of your business! Why are you even talking to me?”

“Andrea wants you. He said to bring you to his office, when you got back.”

Cloud slumped. He was sticky and grouchy and exhausted, having spent the past several hours having sex with two men in a row, and then riding on a motorcycle all the way from the upper city, clinging to a madman for dear life, the entire time (which was still more than half an hour, despite Sephiroth’s kamikaze style of navigating traffic). But Andrea was the boss, so he dragged himself to the elevator, pointedly ignoring Nero, who followed him in, looking infuriatingly smug. 

“Cloud, you’re here,” Andrea said, beckoning them into his office. “Your client has confirmed that trip, he mentioned. You’ll be leaving Friday afternoon, and returning the following Friday.”

Cloud nodded, unable to suppress his smile, upon hearing that he really was going to Wutai with Vincent. And for a whole week! 

“That’s why I called you both in,” Andrea went on. “Nero, this means you’ll be filling in for Cloud, for the first time, Saturday night. It’s a big responsibility. The Honeybees will be counting on you to carry the show.” 

Nero’s crimson eyes flashed eagerly. “I won’t disappoint you, boss.” 

“Good! That’s what I like to hear,” Andrea said, looking pleased. “Cloud, you have a few days before your trip, so I want you to spend them helping Nero prepare for the headlining spot. That’s your top priority. Got it?”

“Yeah, I got it,” Cloud said glumly, his Wutai excitement severely dampened by the prospect of having Nero stuck to his side for three days.

When the two left the office, Nero’s hands were shaking with adrenaline. This was the moment he’d been waiting and preparing for. He was going to see Vincent Valentine, face to face. Finally, everything would be set in motion. Cloud noticed his agitated fidgeting, while they were riding the elevator, and misunderstood.

“Don’t be nervous,” he said. “It’s not much different from the Friday night shows.”

Nero didn’t correct his error. “I heard all the VIPs come to your Saturday shows, though. That’s a lot of pressure.” 

“They’re just bored, old, rich guys. They’re not scary,” Cloud assured him, as the two disembarked, on their floor. “The only one we absolutely must keep happy is Vincent Valentine, and he won’t be there, so there’s nothing to stress about.”

Nero’s heart stopped. “What…he won’t?”

“Of course not,” Cloud said, as if he should have known. “I’m going to Wutai with him. That’s why you’re covering for me, in the first place. See you tomorrow.”

Nero was still reeling from the emotional whiplash, as Cloud walked away, and their rooms were on opposite ends of the hall, so he had no excuse to follow and probe for more information. His initial disappointment quickly gave way anger, at the little blonde who was blithely ruining all his plans. Under a black cloud, he stalked to his room, slammed the door, and threw himself on the bed. Weiss flipped down from the headstand push-ups he’d been doing, and came to sit beside him. 

“I’m covering the bimbo’s show Saturday,” Nero said, before he had a chance to ask. 

“That’s exactly what we wanted,” Weiss pointed out. “What’s wrong?”

“Vincent Valentine won’t be there! He’s taking the bimbo out of town, and that’s why I’m covering for him! It’s like that little rat-faced eyesore exists just to get in my way!”

“There will be other opportunities. Don’t get upset, you’ll make yourself sick,” Weiss said, spreading his arms. “Come here. Let me hold you.”

Nero turned his back and curled into a sullen ball. Undeterred, Weiss dragged his stubborn little brother into his lap, to wrap him up in a tight embrace. Nero wriggled and kicked petulantly, but only for a moment. Then he surrendered and burrowed into his brother’s bare chest, taking deep breaths of his scent, to soothe himself. 

“I hate him, brother,” he pouted, peering up at Weiss from beneath his long, sooty eyelashes. “Kill him, for me.”

Weiss smiled adoringly, smoothing the silky, black hair back from his pallid face. “Soon, my love. We must first fulfill our purpose. Then we will have leisure, to bathe in the blood of our enemies.” 

“But who knows how long that’s going to take,” Nero huffed. “I want to kill him, now.”

Weiss chuckled, a low, rumbling sound that vibrated in his broad ribcage. “Have patience, little one. When all is done, I will bring him to you, and we will take our time with him. I wonder how long we can keep him alive.”

Nero pushed him onto his back and straddled him, sliding his hands up and down his ridiculously muscular torso, his crimson eyes kindled with a deranged light. “Tell me, brother. Tell me what you’ll do to him. I want to hear it, so I can imagine every single detail.”

THE AUTHOR HAS SOMETHING TO SAY

MY SAD MURDER-BABY SEPHIROTH SOMEONE BE NICE TO HIM

[curry-and-gunpowder]

Okay so I have some stuff to get off my chest, might get a bit heated, but I mean no disrespect to anyone, just expressing my genuine confusion and frustration and trying to make my stance on some matters clear.

Clearly I ship Odazai. But that does not mean I reject other interpretations of their relationship. Be it platonic, queerplatonic, brotherly, it's all lovely to me - I genuinely just enjoy their unique dynamic.

However, I am constantly on the brink of losing it over hearing them referred to as a father/son pair by so many people in the fandom. And I'm gonna attempt to break down why this interpretation bothers me so much.

Firstly, it just flies in the face of my personal experience of intergenerational friendships - I'm a young-ish Millennial with many Gen Z friends. And I find it completely incomprehensible to try and force people who are relatively close in age into such a dynamic. I'm aware that a lot of bsd fans are teens or young adults who maybe don't have much social contact with people outside their age range. But as a 30+ person on the Internet, let me tell you, five years? That's nothing. The plain truth is, the older you get, the less age starts to matter. Once you get out of school, you will interact with people of all ages regularly and you will have friends who are older or younger than you and nobody fucking cares. The thought of seeing any of my younger friends as my children is, pardon my french, fucking ridiculous.

Secondly, and I've spoken about this before, the fandom's tendency to parentify Odasaku way beyond what the text ever implies. It's easy to put him into the role, considering the way he cares for his orphans. In that way, he has some parental traits - but it's only a facet of his personality, and, i would argue, one that the fandom puts way too much emphasis on, imho. I'll gladly write some more meta on that at a later time, but doing that here would make the post even longer than it already is. Just to quickly reiterate, for anyone who hasn't read the dark era lightnovel - Oda does explicitly NOT treat the kids like his children. Why then would he treat Dazai like one? Dazai, whom he explicitly invites to go drinking with him in TDIPUD? How does that track? Is he supposed to be just a shitty parent? Or could it maybe indicate that he sees Dazai as his equal more than anything?

(Tangentially, I would argue that Oda's perception of what constitutes a child/an adult is horrendously skewed, considering his own past.)

Thirdly, and this is probably gonna be the one that might get me into hot water with some people, the thing I like to call the Cope. The tendency in fandom to manifest a hard line between groups of characters that somehow should never be crossed when shipping, otherwise that makes the ship badwrongtoxic. This is a phenomenon I've observed developing more and more in recent years, and it's ngl pretty worrying, because it's generally used to present one's own ship as "superior", and all "rival ships" as less than/bad. Ships with "significant" age gaps tend to fall into that category relatively often, but I suspect very few people actually genuinely care about the characters' ages, but rather use it as a shield to justify why these relationships are To Be Avoided. Odazai is an absolute stellar example of such a ship - by all means it should be way more popular than it is, considering the themes that surround it and the way its absolutely center to the nareative of bsd. But without fail, when I look up media for the ship, be it YouTube videos or simply browsing the tag on tumblr or pinterest, I see the same mantra repeated over and over - "how can you ship them, they're like father and son!"

(I'm concerned about the relationship you have with your parents, I say to myself in response.)

And its, quite frankly, just not the case. I cannot for the life of me find any indication of this so-called parental relationship anywhere in the text. All I can see is two people who are friends who have a deep and sincere love for each other.

In conclusion, not every relationship has to fall into the category of familial or romantic. Sometimes... people are just friends. Sometimes friends are some years apart in age. It's not shocking or special or anything, it literally happens all the time.

Just let them be friends. It's fine, really, it's allowed.

[eisforeidolon]

Heller: Explain to me how Dean wasn't totes in lurve with the angel when he went into a deep depression every time Castiel died and was totes happy every time the angel came back?!?

Why bother? It's not like they listened the first fifty times, but hey, I'm bored today. Let's ignore the blatantly wrong hyperbole of Dean doing anything "every time" Castiel died. Fundamentally, you can break this down into two equally stupid categories of assertions:

How People Work: A person would only be devastated by the death of someone they were in love with.

What Even Is Canon: Dean was genuinely devastated by Castiel's deaths even given the comparisons to times we saw Dean actually devastated, devastated by Castiel's death alone in any of those situations, and glad to have Castiel back for himself and not what he could do for them as a semi-indestructible ally.

The first is hellers demonstrating their usual pointed ignorance of normal human behavior and relationships in service of pretending their ship is the undeniable center of the universe. Only someone who has never had a genuinely good friend - or is too young and/or lucky to have never lost one - would assert you can only be devastated by losing a romantic love. Whether it was pure lipservice or not, the show repeatedly told us Castiel was the Winchesters' "best friend" who was "like a brother". So the only thing further thing that needs to be said about it this is: fuck right on out of here with that weird-ass antisocial bullshit.

The second is hellers ignoring literally everything in the canon that they can't make about Dean and Castiel - so they can pretend a storyline actually exists between Dean and Castiel. They can keep acting like context is an entirely foreign concept, but that doesn't do anything but make them look like fools over and over.

We've seen Dean actually devastated - when he lost or was going to lose Sam. He told Bobby to let the world end, sold his soul, made deals with Death and random angels, etc. I could go on, but the basic underlying point was that he literally never went to similar lengths over Castiel. Not only that, but for every single time Castiel died and Dean was upset? Bigger and far more devastating things were going on contributing to his overall mindset and alcohol abuse.

The first two angel explosions, Dean barely has time to react. So let's jump directly to the Leviathan fiasco. First, Dean's not just upset Castiel's dead, he's upset Castiel was fucking lying and going behind their backs for a year and is now dead after breaking Sam's brain and declaring himself God. Again, going back to a lack of understanding of how people work? If you don't get why being mad at a dead friend would fuck you right up ... well. Which doesn't even get into the fact that Dean is ALSO very upset about having to go on the run from seemingly invincible monsters from Purgatory (including ditching his beloved car), Sam currently barely holding on to his sanity, more guilt over lying to Sam about Amy, and then Bobby dying on top of it. As to him being happy to have Castiel back? He's happy - to find someone with the potential to fix Sam, after which he ditches Castiel's comatose ass with Meg in an asylum without looking back. When the tablet wakes the angel back up? I'm not even sure you could call his reaction "happy" so much as willing to take advantage of someone with knowledge and powers to try and fix the still ongoing shitstorm of the Leviathans.

There's an interim death where April the reaper stabs him, but since Gadreel immediately heals him - just as he did with Charlie an episode later, except Dean actually asks for Charlie to be resurrected, Gadreel brings Castiel back on his own initiative? There's again not much of a reaction to speak of. Except in the sense that Dean's very next action, after seeing the consequences of Castiel being on his own mostly human in a world full of angels out for his head? Is to kick Castiel out of the bunker without even giving him money or pointing him towards one of their safe houses because he's not as important to Dean as Sam continuing to be healed.

When Castiel is stabbed by Lucifer at the end of season 12, sure Dean is upset. But it's fucking insane to pretend that he's not more upset about his recently-returned-to-life mother, the trauma of whose original loss basically shaped his entire fucking life, being yanked into a rift to an alternate universe with Lucifer! FFS. Then there's the part where Lucifer's super powerful Nephilim child has just been born and might kill just them or maybe the whole world, too. Sure he prays to Chuck for Castiel's return - right along with Mary's and even Crowley's. But he doesn't offer anything for it and immediately gives up when there's no answer. When he meets up with Billie a few episodes later after temporarily killing himself on a case, despite their meta it was in despair over the angel? He asks immediately to go back to life, and when Billie prevaricates? He asks for the ghosts in the house to be freed. He admits to feeling fatalistic because of his inability to save Castiel BUT ALSO Mary AND EVEN the rando VotW kid that just died in the house with equal weight. He asks for information about Mary. He does not ask for Castiel to be resurrected or to be reunited with him in any other way. Sure he's glad Castiel returns shortly thereafter - but it does not stop any of his angsting the rest of the season over Mary and Jack. I think his pulling a gun on Kaia is deeply OOC, but that's well after Castiel's resurrection and they're gonna pretend that's happy, well-adjusted Dean totes fixed by Castiel's return? LOL. Not even to mention that after one episode of the angel being back, Dean is perfectly happy for Castiel to fuck off out of his presence to search for Jack - and when Castiel promptly gets himself kidnapped? Dean doesn't notice the person who is calling to check in every single day about the search, who it is explicitly canon he personally talked to on the phone, is not Castiel. Just like Dean didn't notice him being possessed by Lucifer in season 11, oops.

Then we get to the final one. Yeah, Dean is upset Castiel died after his brain reboots from having to listen to Misha queerbait the shit out of his sheep Castiel's derpy, rambling goodbye speech about ambiguous love. But he was already upset and drinking for pulling a gun on Sam, for Billie's plan being a double-cross, for Chuck having turned full villain and absorbed Amara making him more powerful than ever while Jack got de-powered, for the overall questions he's struggling with about destiny and free will when Chuck has been manipulating their entire lives, for Chuck disappearing seemingly every-fucking-body on the planet except him, Sam, and Jack. Sure Dean mentions Castiel specifically when he and Sam offer to fight to the death for Chuck's amusement if he puts everything back - probably because he was killed in a different way from the rest of the vanished. But it's not more of an impassioned plea than Dean gives birds or showing more upset than when Chuck vanishes Miracle right after they find him. Then there's having to deal with Michael again, so sure, Dean is hopeful that Castiel might return for a hot second when they need all the help they can get. But once it's all said and done and they've tricked Chuck and installed Jack as the new God who brings the rest of the planet back? Dean doesn't ask Jack to bring Castiel back one last time. When Sam is sad about missing Jack and Castiel, Dean waxes philosophical about how they need to just enjoy their lives without them and is more interested in his pie. They can write all the bad meta they want about Dean intentionally impaling himself on that rebar, but he's clearly happy with no Castiel in sight. When Dean arrives in heaven, even when Bobby explicitly mentions Castiel, Dean shows literally no interest in asking about or seeking out the angel. His car, on the other hand comes immediately to mind. If that isn't clear enough, we see exactly what reunion makes Dean's heaven more than "almost perfect" and brings full closure to his story. Since they desperately wanted to count TW when they had delusions of it canonizing their ship, let's throw in that TW's meddling ghost Dean is still fixing things so Sam can have a full life, looking up random AU versions of his parents, and hanging out with ghost Bobby - while literally no one even mentions Castiel anywhere in his vicinity. Everything he could ever want or need or dream? Doesn't include Castiel. Totes twue lurve, yeah?

While I think that makes the point as clearly as anything could, I'd also like to mention in passing that I didn't even go over several additional times when Castiel was maybe going to die and/or Dean basically shrugged it off because he didn't care that much or bigger shit was going down elsewhere. This is already long enough already, and ultimately no amount of actual canon is ever going to matter to people who pretend anything that doesn't fit into their fantasies about YA romance tropes and the secret meaning of wardrobe and pastry magically doesn't exist.

Still, it's very easy to explain, it's all right there in a basic human understanding of relationships and the show's canon.

[jynjackets]

for the ask game your fav ship ever: bix/cassian 😍

omg my otp <3

dedicated to all four of the shippers aka my biggest fans mwah 😙

before i catch strays, here’s some optional background information under the cut

tbh, I would not give a single shit about this ship if:

-their dynamic and her character wasn’t written to be extremely sexist. it’s literally so fucking sad if i have to explain that fridging a woman who had zero significance outside of ‘caring about cassian’ is sexist. like. this character is unique in that she was purely, entirely made in bad faith. have you even questioned why she is the only latina? along with the fact that his biological sister was implied to be a prostitute?

- the ‘fans’ weren’t using it as a hateship by saying a background extra was meant for cassian just to hate on jyn before the show even fucking aired. i might believe there’s like 2 genuine people out there but that’s because they genuinely like to know the history before rebelcaptain. that said…

- the binian shippers who also ship rebelcaptain weren’t pretending they’re not insane misogynists for obsessing over a fictional man’s fictional sexual history, as if it is ONLY Cassian’s relationship with them that establishes these women’s importance; as if women literally don’t create their own importance lmao. and even if that extremely fucked-up logic had any truth, even then bin STILL loses

And also like, you idiot fans, please show me where the bin hate is. like WHERE?? because i would be liking and reblogging that shit. where is the hate that ISNT grounded in defending latinos and better writing for female characters? and don’t fucking show me a post from fucking 2022 because the fans made entirely of orientalist men-obsessed bitches are acting like they’re a persecuted minority

- the ‘fans’ weren’t fucking latinophobes and literally harassing me in my anons for being a latina speaking out against their favorite anti-black show. and whose biggest shipper wasn’t a racistass homophobicass first-world white woman in her 60s like 💀 i’m side-eyeing the fuck out of any of you who are even nice about this. you want to /not/ be called a misogynist sooo bad you’ll pretend one of the worst characters ever actually means something to you. let alone to latinas. and is that not weird?? that almost every latina in this fandom doesn’t like or just doesn’t care about this bitch? like who are you trying to fool?

- if the miss morbius actress wasn’t one of the worst people alive. i am so serious.

aside from her father being a piece of shit and one of the richest men men in latin america (meaning she’s a nepo baby, and if she has ever called herself poor she is literally lying), she’s dumb as bricks bruh. not a single brain cell behind anything she says. this is my post about her sexism with some dumb shit she’s said over the years. once in a while is understandable i guess but it’s every fucking time

she’s also a zionist

so yeah. otherwise I genuinely wouldn’t give a shit. i wish we had someone like q’ira which would make it super interesting how cassian ran into criminals before. THAT would say something about cassian and his moral departures in relationships and what that meant meeting jyn who was a rebel ‘on the wrong side’ versus q’ira who also had limited choices but different priorities in needing to rebel. she moreso ‘followed orders’ with maul which would make him understand and be familiar with someone like her. being with someone too similar to him AND contrasting in his morals would be an interesting development to see them need to break it off in order for them to grow.

but alas we have this shit. it’s pretty fucking hard to be a shipper and not fall into one of these categories of shitty fans i talked about. the least worst imo being having piss poor media literacy. so maybe you’re just a dumb don’t-know-better sexist instead of an intentionally malicious sexist. same shit to me tho.

[rat-cannibal]

Word Count: 2000+

ao3:

It’d be weird fucking you with explicit permission from Valentino. I don’t want him to know when I get off.”

“Honestly?” Angel grinned. “Same here. Don’t get much of a choice, though, personally.”

“A real shame.” Husk smiled coyly. “A hottie like you deserves full autonomy over his body.”

“Holy shit, that’s the sexiest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”

“I’ll take anything you want to give me.”

Husk’s eyes narrowed as he idly shuffled the deck of cards in his hands. Instead of gambling today, he was dealing - the euphoric high he got from winning would cloud his judgement for the overlord meeting he was being forced to attend.

Every so often, Valentino liked to host ‘casino-themed meetings’ that consisted of Vox, Velvette, Husker, Zeezi, and Valentino himself. Husk was certain they were just an excuse for Valentino to rebuild his ego after the regular overlord meetings. Everybody in the aptly named ‘casino squad’ was either allied with Valentino or didn’t give enough of a shit to argue with him.

Husk sat staunchly in the second category.

He still continued to attend them because why the hell wouldn’t he? Free entertainment. Watching Valentino prance around like a child while spouting whatever inane idea he had recently come up with brought Husker more joy than it probably should have.

But whatever. He would take his dopamine rushes where he could get them.

As he dealt the deck, he watched the microexpressions of the patrons. A cheek twitch and a tap of the finger - a good deck. 

A thick swallow and a lax grin to put off the other patrons - a bad deck.

Husker knew the game all too well, and was well versed in playing it.

The bad deck guy was bad at bluffing. He was trying to bait good deck guy into folding, and was betting more than he probably should have been on it. Rookie mistake.

Not like being good at gambling was a good thing, either, though, thought Husker, somewhat spitefully. Look at where it got him. Knee deep in cash, and elbow deep in a bottle of vodka every other night. 

He didn’t drink to feel happy anymore - that ship sailed a long ass time ago. No, he drank to not feel like shit. The only thing that brought him joy was gambling.

He knew his position as overlord wouldn’t last forever. Even the best gamblers had to lose sometime. Maybe being kicked out of his self-made fortress of destructive habits wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

His phone buzzed in his pocket. Valentino.

“Sorry, fellas, gotta bounce. You’ll be alright without me, won’t you?” He handed the deck to an employee of the casino and gave the bad-deck-guy a comforting pat on the shoulder. “Good luck on the floor tonight,” he murmured, just loud enough for him to hear, “and by the way - your tell is your right leg. It bounces when you bluff.”

Husk entered the VIP lounge, where Vox and Zeezi were already waiting. Valentino and Velvette usually liked to make some sort of grand entrance.

He motioned to the bartender. “Gimme a scotch whiskey. No ice.”

The bartender slid the drink to him. He grabbed it, then took a seat, sipping it idly. With the tolerance he’d built up, one drink would do nothing to him. Made him look pretty badass, though.

As expected, around 5 minutes after the meeting time, Valentino and Velvette strutted in, followed by a posse of their employees.

“Hello, darlings!” crowed Valentino, languishing onto the loveseat. “So lovely to see you all today.”

“Lovely to see you, too, Valentino,” said Vox, crossing his arms. Husker grunted, then took a swig of his drink. The TV demon leaned forward. “Any particular occasion for this meeting? Or is it just a little get together between friends?”

“As a matter of fact, there is! Some of the other overlords - Zestiel specifically - are a bit too uptight to appreciate what I do. It is, however, the 10th anniversary of the opening of my business, so I thought it was due time to celebrate! To mark the occasion, I brought some of my favourite pets along to show off.”

With a snap, Valentino dimmed the lights. Pornstar after pornstar filed in from the door, striking a couple poses before draping themselves over Valentino suggestively.

Velvette and Vox clapped enthusiastically for each one that entered the room. They weren’t anything special in Husk’s opinion, but he paid attention as a courtesy.

“And, as a grand finale, my favourite little pet, Angel Dust!”

A white spider demon with multi-coloured eyes came strutting towards the table, a seductive grin across his face. 

His eyes didn’t match his smile, and his movements seemed forced - Husk could tell he didn’t want to be there. 

When Valentino traced Angel Dust’s jawline, he flinched momentarily, before leaning into the touch, purring something into the porn demon’s ear.

Valentino pulled Angel Dust into his lap. “Quite something, aren’t they? This is the epitome of all of my hard work. The hottest, sexiest, most desireable demons in hell are all in this room.” Valentino spread his arms. “Go on! Mingle! Get to know them.” He grinned saucily. “The first time for you, my friends, is free.”

Husk held back a scoff. This bitch was whoring out his workers to total strangers. No fucking way this was in the porn star job description. Knowing Valentino, he probably added it to the fine print of the contract they were no doubt forced to sign.

A scantily-clad cat demon shimmied up to him, giving him a sultry smile. “Hey, handsome, love yer whiskers,”

“Uh, thanks.” He shifted uncomfortably. He had no interest in sleeping with one of Valentino’s toys, but he had a feeling that outright rejecting her would land her in trouble with her boss. “I like your, uh, smile. Real genuine.”

Her eyes widened slightly. Surprise. Then, oddly enough, her pupils dilated - arousal. “Why, thank you, honey,” she purred, “my teeth certainly are sharp, aren’t they? Wanna see what they can do?”

“Hey, Callie,” interrupted a brooklyn-accented voice, “lay off, why don’t ya? I got a feeling he doesn’t swing your way.”

The cat - Callie - walked away wordlessly. Husk’s rescuer made himself known by stepping towards him. Angel Dust. “Thanks for helping me out,” thanked Husk.

Angel Dust waved his hand dismissively and took a seat next to him. “Nah, don’t mention it. I could tell you were uncomfortable. Yano, you could’ve just said no and she woulda backed off.”

“I could have,” agreed Husk, taking a sip of his drink, “but I’m sure Valentino would’ve made her pay for it. Am I wrong?”

The spider demon fidgeted with his harness. His eyes darted to the side. “Well, yeah, but that’s not your problem. You don’t need to sit through that shit if you don’t want to.” The words ‘unlike us’ were left unspoken.

“I don’t want to make her job any harder than it has to be.” Husk cleared his throat. “No pun intended.”

Angel barked out a laugh. “I like your style, sweetheart. Kind when you don’t gotta be, not to mention legs for days. Nothin’ compared to me, though, of course, but that’s real hard to accomplish.”

Husk could tell the porn-star was rambling. He didn’t know how to communicate without flirting. A pang of sympathy shot through him. “You know you’re more than that, right?”

Angel swallowed. “What?”

“You’re more than just a sex figure. You’re a real person. And you seem like an upright one, too - real hard to find down here.”

“I’m not part of the ‘first time’s free’ deal, just so ya know. You don’t gotta butter me up.”

“Don’t worry, I have absolutely no intention of doing that.” Husk finished off his glass. “Even if you were part of the deal, I wouldn’t be interested.”

“How come? In case ya didn’t hear Val, I’m hell’s most desirable boy toy.”

“I like my sex fully consensual and free of coercion.” Husk shot a disgusted look at Vox and Velvette, who were indulging in Valentino’s offer already - in plain goddamn daylight. “Unlike some people.”

He heaved himself up from his seat and returned to the bar. He knew the bartender really damn well - too damn well, actually. Both he and the barkeep knew exactly how the night was going to go.

The bartender wordlessly slid a glass of overproof rum over to him - no ice and filled exactly halfway, just how he liked it.

Angel Dust, much to his surprise, had followed him to the bar. “So what’s your deal then, huh? Why’re you at this meeting anyways? No offense, but ya don’t exactly fit in here, toots.”

Husk snorted. “Oh, don’t worry, I take it as a compliment.” He swirled his glass. “I’m here outta boredom.”

“Boredom? I’d think bein’ an overlord would be enough to combat boredom.”

“You’d be surprised,” quipped Husk. “Shit gets old fast. Every day is pretty much the same down here when you don’t need to fear for your life. And when you do the same thing over and over, it stops bringing you joy. So when I find something that does give me that hit of dopamine - namely, your boss making an ass of himself - I indulge it wholeheartedly.”

Angel blinked. “Goddamn. That’s way deeper than I thought it’d be.”

“Sorry.”

“No, no, don’t apologise. Happens a lot in the industry, actually. Drunken colleagues spillin’ secrets to their porno partners, cryin’ in the middle of a scene..” Angel’s eyes widened. “Not that I mean to compare you to us, though. You’re obviously doin’ way better for yourself. Just reminded me of that is all.”

Husk chuckled duly. “Don’t sweat it. And for the record, I’m not doing nearly as well as I seem. I doubt you are, either, are you?” He waved his hand. “You don’t have to answer that.”

Angel took the out and changed the conversation. “So you’re the gambling demon or somethin’ right? I’ve heard a bit about you. Killin’ people with card tricks is pretty badass, ya know.”

“I wouldn’t call them ‘card tricks’,” sniffed Husk, “and I didn’t know people referred to me as the ‘gambling demon’. Not exactly flattering, being named after an addiction. Even if it is accurate.”

“Oh, you think that’s bad? People point to me on the street and yell ‘hey, that’s the porn star!’ At least your title gets you respect.”

Husk laughed deeply. “Well, they’re exposing themselves by saying that, then, aren’t they?”

“As someone who watches porn?” Angel rolled his eyes. “Not much of a confession down here. I’d be more surprised if someone didn’t.”

“I don’t,” said Husk, staring at Angel over the rim of his glass. “I prefer to go straight to the source. Being an overlord doesn’t exactly leave me wanting for a bed warmer. Pretty people are aplenty when you’ve got the power and money to make ‘em stay.”

Angel blinked. Then swallowed. Then bit his lip. “Lucky people they must be, to get a taste of that. I wouldn’t mind joinin’ em.”

Husk threw his drink back and motioned to the barkeep for another. “Tempting offer, but your boss doesn’t seem the type to share. Not outside the industry, at least.”

The spider demon’s eyes darkened. “He owns me in the studio, but outside it, I’m my own goddamn man. He can’t stop me from fucking who I want, when I want, no matter how much he may want to.”

Husk looked him up and down. “Good to know. I’ll store that information away for safekeeping.”

Valentino slinked up to them, draping an arm across Angel’s shoulders. The spider demon flinched slightly, just as he had when Valentino touched his jaw, but relaxed into his arm. “Enjoying yourself, Angel Cakes?”

Angel smiled tightly. “You know it, Val.”

“So glad to hear that.” The moth demon grabbed Angel’s shoulder. Husk held back a wince - he’d seen Valentino’s nails before, and they looked sharp as fuck. “You and I are going to have our own, private celebration after the party. Understood?”

Husk watched Angel’s face fall slightly. His smile looked forced. “Yes sir,” he purred, nestling into Valentino’s arm, “looking forward to it, Val.”

“Good.” Valentino retracted his arm. “I would expect nothing less from my good, little moneymaker.” He looked up at Husk, who had started on his third drink of the night. “You’ll take care of my Angel, won’t you? I don’t like my toys too broken when I play with them.”

Angel’s eyes widened. “But Val, you said -"

“That was for Vox and Velvette,” said Valentino dismissively, “they’ve already taken a liking to you, and I wouldn’t want to get you stolen away. Husker, here, on the other hand.. Well, I’m sure he knows better than to try to take you from me. No matter how tempted he may be.”

Husk grinned laxly. “That I do, that I do. I’d say most people know better than to mess with you - unless they’ve got a death wish, that is,” he flattered. Playing the game was one of his greatest talents. One of the only reasons he still got invited to the casino club gatherings, too.

Valentino relaxed, seemingly satisfied with Husk’s answer. He laughed heartily. “Very true, my friend. Well, I’ll leave you two be.” He sauntered back to the Vee’s table - how he was able to stand Vox and Velvette’s obnoxious moaning was a mystery to Husk. 

Angel hesitated. “So, uh, you wanna..?”

“What, fuck you?” Husk sighed. “Like I said earlier. I like my sex fully consensual and free of coercion. And honestly? It’d be weird fucking you with explicit permission from Valentino. I don’t want him to know when I get off.”

“Honestly?” Angel grinned. “Same here. Don’t get much of a choice, though, personally.”

“A real shame.” Husk smiled coyly. “A hottie like you deserves full autonomy over his body.”

“Holy shit, that’s the sexiest thing anyone’s ever said to me.” Angel bit his lip. “You know, I have a phone number. You can have it, too, if you’d like.”

“I’ll take anything you want to give me.”

[kquil]

every time i find a new blog by sifting through the x reader categories i find the prettiest blogs known to mankind istg ♡ congrats on 1000 btw!!! im new here but love, love, LOVE your writing already.

for your celebration, could i get a 🧁 by chance?

im 5'4, brown hair with dark blue eyes. im an introvert, infp, and a slytherin [ mainly cause im ambitious as hell ]. i love, love the color pink!!! it's my favorite color of all fucking time. like, i see something i like, ill be looking for it in the color pink. i like to think im a very giving and generous person. just today one of my new co-workers said they liked my bracelet and my instant reaction was to give it to her. plus, i like to see other humans happy. i truly believe in the kindness is free sort of deal.

when it comes to interpersonal relationships, my usually introverted self becomes much more open. still, i can be pretty reserved even with my friends because my social battery drains so, so quick. however, with those select few, it feels like i don't have a social battery. my hopes for a romantic relationship would definitely include movie nights with a giant pillow fort. if we can't do that, then what's the point. oh, and bookstore dates + picnics afterward. also, my love languages are definitely touch and gift giving. something wonky and weird about me is that im extremely prone to accidents. im constantly discovering random bruises all over myself + getting hurt, and ending up in the emergency room.

i think that's a pretty good description of me!! so yeah (: again, fricken love ur blog!!!! ♡

awwww~ thank you so much for liking my blog aesthetic and calling it pretty and enjoying my writing! that makes me so happy! (≧▽≦) since you’re new here, welcome! and i hope you enjoy what i came up with for you~ 

I ship you with Regulus Black 

i. for a slytherin, you’re quite unique in how you act sometimes. regulus being his usually observant self always sees you in his peripheral with your close group of friends but also often easily making friends with other houses when forced to interact during classes. he can see that they realise how personable you are and how…you’re nothing like a slytherin but regulus can also see those snake-like traits in you. he sees your high ambitions and it isn’t anything like his other slytherin friends’ hopes for their futures. you don’t crave power for yourself, you crave reaching your personal, unfeasible goals. he often hears you muttering to yourself about what achievements you want to get in your academics, he doesn’t believe you’ll make it but keeps his mouth shut and waits for the results… proving him wrong each time, and now, he finds himself secretly hoping that you achieve everything you hope to achieve in life, no matter how formidable. 

ii. you keep surprising him. he’s never seen green be paired with so much pink before. but you make it work somehow, he doesn’t know why it suits you so well when it would look ridiculous on other people. when he glimpses you from across the library and takes in all your pink stationary, he imagines his slytherin friends with the same pink materials and snorts when the image that manifests in his mind becomes too ludicrous for him to imagine further. “What’s got you in such a light mood, Reg?” one of his friends asks suspiciously, missing the way his steel-grey eyes linger on you before answering, “nothing…”

iii. another way that you intrigue regulus is through your interaction with your close friends. he has many who would rather lose their limbs than share their good fortune with others but you don’t even bat an eye when offering your personal valuables. It’s so otherworldly to regulus how you’re passive to power and wealth but still so ambitious and snake-like. you bring a new image about slytherins that’s refreshing and hardly ever antagonistic, creating a warm feeling that blooms in his chest. regulus reasons that it’s hope for future slytherins to follow in your example when he’s too caught up in his family drama to confidently make independent decisions. That’s not the only feeling he’s experiencing, however, and it becomes obvious the more time he spends at Hogwarts with you slowly moving from his peripheral view to his centre of focus.

iv. regulus was subtle in his approach but to his friends, who knew him, he was being too obvious. he first approached you in the library, appearing to look at the books in the shelves next to you as you were preoccupied with reading one you had recently pulled off the shelf. he glances at you over the cover of the book he was pretending to read and you do the same, the two of you actually meet eyes a couple of times but never say a word to each other. it’s become quite a small routine for the two of you to read standing side by side at the shelves. sometimes, regulus would be the one to approach you, other times it would be you approaching him. Sometimes it would be for long periods of time, to the point where you both would end up sitting on the floor together, and other times, it would be for a short few minutes and one of you has to leave. it was a good routine, quickly becoming familiar and comfortable but it was too silent. 

v. eventually, at the same time, you two plucked up the courage to ask the other to sit at a table and read. it was quite a flustering situation; it was the first time he got to hear your voice up close and it was the first time you got a close up look on the famous, younger one of the Black brothers. over time, your relationship and readings together became a semi-cuddle on the common room sofas where you both held a book to read and one of you would eventually find their fingers combing through the other’s hair. many of your house mates saw you two like this and grew curious over how such an odd couple came to be. a unique pairing, indeed. a very true slytherin loving on a slytherin that didn’t really act like one. they grew to accept it eventually. 

vi. the two of you were in denial, however; you two were just good friends. good friends who spent a lot of time together, gifted each other small but meaningful things, who go to the bookstore together while holding hands, who frequently go on picnics by the lake after visiting the kitchens and who cuddle close to each other at every opportunity. It’s all innocent, just like how regulus innocently kisses your temple whenever he greets you and innocently holds your hand on instinct; carrying around a bottle of bruise ointment for your clumsiness. Very innocent indeed, with the way you like to curl up in regulus’s arms for comfort, seeking him out for every little thing, no matter how small, innocent, with how close you like to keep your face close his, how you seem to be the only one to make regulus happy and how he only seems to relax into your arms and nobody else's — he wouldn’t even let others touch him, especially not in the same way you do. 

vii. yes, it’s all very innocent but you two are so perfect together, i can’t see you with anyone else other than our beloved reggie. you two just have to get it together and finally make it official — everyone’s sick and tired of your puppy love, simply because you’re too cute of a couple to even make fun of.

1K MILESTONE EVENT | NAVI.

[inevitablestars]

hehehehehehehhe <— me cackling evilly while rubbing my hands together

sirius pls for the ask game<3

oh so you want me to yap

How I feel about this character

.... say it with me: INSANE ABOUT SIRIUS. have been thinking about sirius since i was a small child and i just never stopped??? attached myself to him like a stray dog and i cant let go. very very very normal as you can see. ill be thinking about sirius for the rest of my life i fear. sirius is just so complex and i want to root around in his head for hours. i could find something new every time i do. also no matter what fic i am writing i am inside of sirius' head it might not be his pov but i am in there and know how he would react to everything.

and like. there's so much there!!! his family the prank the marauders harry azkaban like the possibilities are endless. and because of all of the previous pieces (and more) or any combination of them like thats one fucked up little guy and it only makes me love sirius more

they are in my pocket and will be there for the rest of time

All the people I ship romantically with this character

the obvious, remus. can't go wrong there. put them in any situation and it will work. literally any.

and heres the thing, i don't actively read or seek out any other sirius ships but like... now that im being asked.... i could be convinced of others. give me a good and compelling story and i could be interested. some that fit in this category are: james, lily, wolfstarbucks, peter, kingsley, marlene. have i read most of those? no i have not, but if someone im friends with wrote any of them yeah id give it a shot. nothing replaces wolfstar tho nothing can

My non-romantic OTP for this character

regulus. i think thats obvious (<- guy who has never shut up about the black brothers) whether they are close and have a good relationship or havent spoken in a decade im gonna love it. they love each other more than anything else and soemtimes that drives them apart but sometimes it doesnt and god i will explode if i think about them for too logn it causes me phsyical pain

also the rest of the black family. in order of how insane they make me after regulus: bellatrix (she literally killed him what do you want me to say), andromeda, narcissa, walburga, everyone else

outside of the family though, james and lily. easy.

My unpopular opinion about this character

sirius can do no wrong. idc!!!!!!!!! hes never done a single thing wrong in his life. like yeah hes stupid sometiems but thats my stupid guy :( hes trying his best hes fucked up and has been since he was born its not his fault

also just like why is there discourse about his appearance. i dont see characters in my head but like idc if hes tall or not or if theyre whatever gender. sirius is hot and also a little guy.

also also he's smart. really fucking smart. he just doesnt always care so it comes off like hes not. and like he wants it to seem like hes cool and has his shit together but he is losing his mind all the time

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

that he and regulus got to reunite :( or that he didn't die. that would be lovely. or if you know his name was cleared and he got to actually take harry in like he wanted to that would be so so cool for everyone involved

[leam1983]

Grief

Sarah and I didn't do shit today. I mostly bawled through the morning and emerged out of the bedroom in sweatpants, unshaved, to head straight down to the kitchen where I wolfed down two peanut butter toasts and - proceded to cry my eyes out for forty-five minutes longer. Sarah's face scrunched up as soon as she saw me turn red and she bawled with me off-and-on. Walt steered the ship with the sort of self-control you'd associate to Bomb Squad technicians - at least until he stepped away for coffee or his lunch break.

Then it was a long, strong and silent hug, with his own anguish making his diaphragm and belly shake. Walt's the type to cry when something positive or beautiful moves him to tears - but when pain's involved, he turns mostly silent.

Our Compliance Officer got a little nosy and Walt was forced to spill the beans, over vidcon. She shrugged.

"Well, you can always get another dog, right?"

Famous last words traditionally spoken by those who never owned a pet before. There is no getting another dog. There is no replacement to consider. You don't replace family members when they're gone. It's not a fucking catalytic filter that God steals from your metaphorical Mommy SUV for the ceramic and copper inserts.

When Romeo died, eleven years of love, patience, mild exasperation and so, so much fun got ripped out of me. Imagine realizing that these are your last instants with your parents, knowing it'll take you weeks, months or more to process their absence. Then imagine Walt's split-second expression of white-hot rage at that thoughtless suggestion.

I don't imagine you grieve sea monkeys. I also figure terrarrium owners trying to follow the trend of self-sufficient ecosystems in sealed jars also don't grieve nematodes.

Curiously enough, though, you do grieve computers you donate. You grieve shirts that no longer fit you. You grieve your first set of furniture, your first condo. Your first love.

Obviously, you grieve friends and family when they pass.

If your pets don't fit in that category, affectively speaking, I would contend that there's something deeply wrong with you. Pets are family - unequivocally.

I didn't just lose a dog, last night. I lost a friend, a little brother; the most constant companion in my life outside of my parents, Sarah or Walt.

Or if you want a more on-the-nose example, consider that the John Wick series, with its hours upon hours of stylish shoot-outs and body counts that would make actual hitmen and assassins blush, is entirely predicated upon grief.

Grief isn't to be taken lightly. Tell me my dog is replaceable and I'll tell you your significant other is just a lump of flesh on legs that wears cologne or perfume right.

[this-world-of-beautiful-monsters]

WIP Wednesday

Wasn’t planning on do this, but got inspired by @kayjaydee17‘s amazing teaser, I hope that’s okay.

Warnings for blood, injury, fire, sensory overstimulation, and very brief references to noncon and ableism.

Here's a recipe:

Take a girl. Make her part Na'vi, part Avatar, part demon, part miracle, part future Tsakarem, part future warrior. Make her the daughter of three mothers--one living, one dead, one beyond such categories--and a soldier father at war with a hungry ghost.

Shift her one step to the left, so that she sees the world the way no one else quite can. Give her a brain that haunts her with seizures and strangeness, give her a planet face alien invasion, giving a strange hunger curling in her bones that she can't explain.

Take her home in the woods and send her to a strange land, where the pounding sea keeps her awake every night and the word freak haunts her steps like a shadow. Take her friend, and give him back broken. Take her brother, and give her a corpse. Take her mother and give her a woman bleeding from wounds old and new, struggling not crumble under them all.

Add a bunch of bruising hands, snap cuffs, hungry eyes as she kneels on a deck with her sister at her side. Leave her with enough innocence to only sense how much worse it could have been, how lucky she was, enough knowledge that suspect that others (Monkey Boy) weren't so fortunate.

Stir her up with terror and blood and fear, the weight of pleas on her tongue and in her ears. Send her running through a dying ship with her family and the screams of tearing metal ringing through her skull, grinding her to dust.

Bring past the boiling point, high enough to burn.

Take a deep breath and wait.

They kept Tuk from falling into the darker bowels of the ship, but the access hatch sliced Mom's ribs open. Not as deep as it could be (Kiri can see a flash of someone else's memory, her brother heaving for air on a dull red rock) but deep enough to leave her panting on the tilting deck of the ship, heaving for air.

"Fuck," Spider rasps, hands pressed next to Kiri's against Mom's damp skin. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." Blood drips from his own chest, mixing with Mom's cut, and honestly there's probably some kind of metaphor or whatever there, like a song, but right now Kiri's head is too full of screaming to contemplate it.

Besides them, Tuk whimpers. She's curled up in a ball next to them, hands pressed over her ears, and Kiri feels so desperate to do the same it hurts. She wants to curl uptight, wants to rock herself into oblivion as she loses herself in her own head, her own body, reclaiming each fragment of them as her own.

Mom coaks, eyelids fluttering. "Go," she grits out, hand joining Spider's and Kiri's to press against her stomach. "Come back for me."

"We’re not going anywhere," Kiri shoots back. Her tongue is numb with smoke and her head is buzzing with heat and she has never felt as lost as she has today; her voice comes out a smoke-cracked, desperate growl, impossible to recognize.

Everything's loud, everything so loud, fire screaming and crackling until she's terrified of having another seizure. Her hands shake and she wants to press them to her ears, but she'll get blood on them, sinking down the canals and burning up her brain.

Her wrists hurt, aching with the memory of cold cuffs and cold railings, and her throat is worse, a faint sting from the blood crusted on her neck. Not like Mom's or even Spider's, but the knife had been so cold cutting her skin, and the voice curling in her ear had been colder still. 

Hold still, little lady, the demon purred in her ear, voice like rotten honey dripping down her back, and she couldn't breathe. She still can't breathe.

She feels Tuk's fear along with her own, jittering over Kiri's skin. She can pick up on the terror Mom's trying so hard to hide, the grief and pain and sick creeping strands of resignation in that heart which has always been so strong. Kiri's sickeningly grateful she can't feel Spider's mind, too.

She thinks about what Tuk said when they first came to this place: I want to go home. Kiri wants that too, especially now; wants the quiet of the woods wrapping around her like a heavy blanket, the familiar sights and sounds keeping her sane. She wants to go back to the forest as it was before the Sky People came, when it was just her and the people she loved, when being different felt like a blessing instead of a burden growing heavier every day.

"Leave me," Mom insists. Kiri just shakes her head wildly, tears tracking down her face.

Mom's wrong, she is, but there's still no way she's swimming off this ship with her wound. They need something to hold her, they need herbs for her wound before it bleeds out, they need it to be yesterday or two years ago before everything started hurting so much.

"Great Mother," Tuk sobs, little voice shaking. "Great Mother, help us, please, please..."

Please, Kiri joins in silently. She grits her teeth and pushes her mind into the chaos, the endless spiraling noise, struggling to stay grounded as her head throbs and her hands shake. Great Mother, someone, anyone. Help us.

Around her, she can feel the terror of ocean creatures fleeing from the fire, the pain of those caught up and burning. She can feel the flash of Metkayina warriors still battling in the distance, taking revenge for all the terror and grief the Sky People have inflicted on them.

Somewhere she can catch Dad and Quaritch battling, fragments of hate like nothing she's ever known. She thinks she's feeling echoes of Lo'ak and Tsireya, the deep slow consciousness of Payakan, but it's impossible to pin any of them down.

Deeper than all that is Eywa's heartbeat shuddering through her bones, a wild, almost frantic beat, or maybe that's just her imagination. Maybe she really is crazy, maybe there's nothing, but Kiri can't believe that, she can't, or she'll break completely.

Help us, she insists, her mind balancing on the line between ragged need and iron will. Show me the way out.

[aelaer]

Alright, let’s take that follow up ask 😂

18. What are some tropes that others love, but you just tend to avoid?

Or something along those lines. Things you like/dislike. What marks the difference between a “good” and a “great” fic for you?

Whelp I lost my draft as I started this. I figured that's as good a sign as any to save this as a draft and review it a few times to make sure I'm critical of the *genre and trope* and not the individual writing it. And yes I think they're two *very* distinct things. And I'd like to piss off as few people (who aren't blocked) as possible while still remaining true to myself. We'll see how successful it is.

Cut cuz it got long and if folks click it thinking they might get mad, and then get mad, well, you can't say I didn't warn you. I don't like quite a few popular tropes in a lot of stories you see Stephen in. And I'll not hide my own opinions on my own blog. 😜 What's the terminology? Don't like, don't read? Yeah, if (general) you don't like strong opinions that might go against yours, don't read on. You've been warned!

Let's start with some of the most popular AO3 tropes, taken from the 2016 Fanfic Survey from Fansplaining. Here's the top 20 tropes across the survey and if I dislike it, I have bolded it and have a comment beside it. Otherwise I'm indifferent to it or I like the trope.

Friends to Lovers

Canon-divergent Alternate Universes

Slow Burn

Rescue Missions/Saving Each Other

Bed Sharing (aka One Hotel Room Left) Honestly I find this trope really stupid in most circumstances. It just makes me roll my eyes. This isn't to say that fics with this trope are badly written, I just... think the situation's really contrived. There's better ways to explore pining.

Teamwork

Fluff

Hurt/Comfort

Huddling for Warmth I only dislike it if it's adding unnecessary sexual tension. Like if you're in a perilous situation you don't need to talk about how omg touching him makes you feel things. It's like - dude you're gonna lose fingers otherwise. Characters, you need to shut the fuck up, this is not the right time. You guys can be romantic later. Hell this even counts for established relationships; characters getting aroused when they're in actual perilous situations is one of my biggest pet peeves in romance. It's dumb. (Note- this doesn't count if they're joking about it, joking is a great coping mechanism. I mean legit horniness as they're half-dead or something. What the fuck. Exception if the author explicitly lists being in legit perilous situations as a fetish in which case, good for author for that creativity.)

Mutual Pining

Established Relationship

Fix-it Fic

Isolated or Trapped (e.g. in a cave, a Canadian shack, etc.)

Missing scenes or fill-in fic

Everyone Knows They're In Love

Unresolved Sexual Tension

Fake Relationship (incl. Married for a Case and Marriage of Convenience)

Pining

Worldbuilding

Only 2 out of the top 20, not bad! Most are "take it or leave it" but some I like so yay.

Okay now for the next part.

On my Doctor Strange AO3 filtered page that I have up in perpetuity on my phone, I have the following filters applied to exclude (which takes off about 20% of all fics in the category from sight). Ordered from least likely to offend to most likely to offend others:

Non-English fics

Peter Parker/Stephen Strange

Stephen Strange/Reader

Not Civil War Team Captain America Friendly & Not Steve Rogers Friendly

An honorable spicy mention that isn't easily filtered so I don't filter it but I get into it below. It involves Peter.

Not English fics: With as picky a reader as I am, auto Google Translate simply doesn't work well for me. Trust me, I've tried and I was very sad when translate proved to be less than great. I wish I could speak/read all languages.

Peter/Stephen: I had to block this one because it was just coming up too much after NWH, but America/Stephen falls here as well (it's just significantly rarer and I can easily skip those fics). No hard feelings to those who write/ship it because they're, you know, fictional, but I'm definitely not a fan of the trope. Underage with two minors already skeeves me out, underage with a middle aged man and a minor is a big no-go unless the adult is framed as a villain in the narrative (and with luck gets justice served to him). But in the shipping sense this isn't usually the case in the story, and while some authors do a great job in showing it's not right/good, this isn't my flavor of Stephen at all. Even villain Stephen.

In the case the minors are aged up to be legal, I still dislike it. I find it incredibly creepy IRL when a person goes for someone who is young enough to be their child, and I can't separate that feeling in the fiction I read for the most part. The exception to this rule is when the person is like over 35 - by that age you know if you want to be with a 55 year old, and you have all that life experience. But there's so much growing done in the 20s and a lot of life experience that nothing but time can provide.

Finally, I find men in their 40s who are looking for someone (especially a girl) 24 or younger incredibly immature and, frankly put, the absolute opposite of dignified and sexy. There are exceptions of course, but my good guy!Stephen doesn't fall into that category. He's interested in brains, personality, and life experience, with looks being like, the 4th factor, haha, so no need for such a large age gap. Again, just skeeves me out.

Stephen Strange/Reader: I wouldn't have blocked it if it wasn't so prevalent, but it's literally Stephen's second-most popular ship. All respect to anyone who enjoys reader-insert fics, but I just... don't. The handful of times I've tried it I couldn't see myself as the supposed character because they were so different from who I am as a person. "Choose your own adventure" books that I read in my youth worked for me because I had choices in steering the story; that's not the case in reader fics so I'm left seeing "myself" doing things that I'd never do in a million years. That contradiction just makes me unable to appreciate them myself.

Big reason I don't have that problem with OCs is because they're not me, and so I don't have that weird contradictory feeling while reading the fic. They're another person so I can appreciate them as another character, especially if Stephen manages to stay in character within the story. But as romance isn't a genre I actively look for, I don't tend to look out for OC fics either as they're usually super romance-heavy as opposed to the romance being a side plot (which is how I get through canon char romances - if it's a side plot in the very long story I'll get through it for juicy plot).

Not Civil War Team Captain America Friendly & Not Steve Rogers Friendly: Blocking these two covers the majority of the stories that are not other-character friendly, and it blocks almost all Civil War Team Iron Man fics, so these two tags cover basically the entire gauntlet of that type of MCU fic. Ever since AO3 canonicalized those tags my blood pressure has lowered significantly and it's made browsing AO3 so much less stressful.

I'll say it up front: I don't think a fic can be good writing if it's written to be Not Team Cap Friendly. That's not to say that the writer themselves is incapable of writing quality works because that's usually not the case. But for works with that specific trope, I do not think that work can be good. A significant factor of what I consider good fanfic writing/bad fanfic writing is characterization, and the characterization is usually butchered in this genre of fic.

If an author chooses only to write this trope POV, all the more power to them. However, I think they are limiting their capabilities in choosing to ignore the grey storytelling the MCU brought to the story and are definitely limiting their visions by choosing to view these grey characters and their grey choices as black and white/good and bad with all the nuances erased. And because those choices are made, I don't think that the fic that comes out with those limitations can be considered good writing. And here are the reasons why, largely centering around characterization:

The only way these fics work is by making Steve completely OOC. I've seen writers erase all his leadership capabilities established in the first 3 films he was in, his ability to think fast on his feet, any sign of intelligence that is firmly established in the first three films he was in, and make him callous in a way that he hasn't ever shown in canon. I've seen writers make Steve unaware of email, I've seen them say that he never led men in WW2 (and isn't an actual captain), and most ridiculously, I've seen them say he was trying to kill Tony in Siberia and left him for dead there and completely ignore all his training in that if he wanted to kill Tony, he very well could have. (And ignore that T'Challa was there as well ffs - that's another rant.) But yes - this is all OOC to Steve's character. If someone wants to know why saying Steve trying to kill Tony in Siberia is OOC and thus not Steve friendly, send me a separate ask as I have a write up on Discord that I can bring here if folks want clarification on that front.

If you have to make other characters OOC to make your best boy shine better, I don't trust you to write best boy well. And usually he isn't. Tony is a terribly flawed character which is why he's so so so interesting, but Not Team Cap friendly fics are determined to erase all of Tony's flaws and everything that makes him interesting. For instance, I've seen Tony suddenly become an expert negotiator and politician, ignoring both IM2 and his lack of finesse with Ross in CW (this isn't him delegating the work to lawyers/PR people - this is in fics where he's the figurehead behind this because he's suddenly an expert political negotiator). Then in some fics Tony's suddenly a socialist, ignoring the fact that he's made his fortune and still makes money from his corporation and there's nothing in canon that suggests that he ain't still benefiting from the capitalist institution. He's *generous*, absolutely, and I headcanon he put in hundreds of millions into rebuilding Sokovia - but he's not suddenly a socialist. He's a rich white man with rich white man privileges and while he's doing his best to make good in the world, he has benefits that the rest of the world just doesn't. And Tony's still arrogant and it can still be hard to work with him and erasing all those flaws makes him just... not Tony. He's just this bland vanilla OOC caricature.

In a lot of "not team cap friendly" fics I see a tag along the lines of "actions have consequences". If that's the case, why the hell wasn't Tony prosecuted for making Ultron? Wanda didn't force him to make anything - she amplified his fears, absolutely, but he made the robot. In secret. And that robot killed a city. Tony in CW is rightfully really regretful about it - but if actions actually had consequences and Tony tried to get Team Cap like, jailed or forcefully retired (like he or his friends do in some fics), Nat should strike back and tell everyone that he was behind Ultron. IT'S LIKE EVERY CHARACTER MAKES MISTAKES OR SOMETHING AND THAT NONE OF THEM ARE PERFECT. WHAT A THOUGHT. And that's why that tag is not very well thought out. The tag ignores the stark (hah) fact that all Avengers have made mistakes, some of them major - and Tony's absolutely not exempt from that. And his mistake-making didn't stop after he became Iron Man.

All of Tony's friends ignore that Tony recruited a 15 year old to Germany and guess what? Pepper and Rhodey aren't Tony boot-lickers. They'd give him the appropriate "What the fuck were you thinking" language because yeah, that was fucked up! Ignoring that happened is another big item in these type of fics.

Stephen's personality is typically bland and he often has no life beyond Tony's in these type of fics. He definitely has no opinions on the Avengers that *differ* from Tony because him having his own opinions, or taking the time to form his own opinions from his own interactions, would be showing more nuance and depth than these fics want to get into.

Stephen's often petty and violent, especially towards Steve - and again completely ignores all of Tony's mistakes because Tony doesn't make horrific mistakes, oh no! I'd argue the petty violence is OOC, but fucking DS2 and fucking Waldron Jossed that. So if you want that petty violence, it's technically seen on screen, but that's a *Waldron* idea so... yeah. I don't know any big Stephen fan who is particularly fond of Waldron and what he brought to Stephen's character. But this whole essay is about OOC characterization so I can't argue that this is OOC anymore. Fucking Waldron.

Like Stephen, Rhodey and Pepper also lose their personalities and ability to argue with Tony because Tony is always right. Rhodey forgets that Tony is a billionaire and can easily go use a lab in Stark Industries buildings across the country, or go to one of his many homes that all billionaires have because they're *billionaires*, if he *has* to avoid Steve for some reason. Rhodey also forgets that Tony could handle this with the best therapist money can by if he can't physically handle being in a room with someone he dislikes. If Steve actually tried to kill him in a fic, please go back to the first bullet point on this list. An IC Steve wouldn't so there wouldn't be that fear of more physical retaliation because Steve wouldn't be trying to stop Tony from killing Bucky, so again, unless Tony tries to kill Bucky once more, the situation won't escalate to violence. But yes, in these fics, Rhodey would prefer that the civil rights breaking Accords that allow indefinite imprisonment with no promise of trial stand. He'd rather the rest of the Avengers remain fugitives with no home because he forgets his friend is a billionaire with virtually unlimited resources to go wherever he wants and to get the help he needs. The growth we see in his stance that came with IW after he saw the Accords' rollout just poofs away.

Pepper tends to be turned into a secretary again just there to help with Tony's emotional needs instead of a powerful CEO whose really fucking busy running a company.

So with an OOC Steve, it usually leads to an OOC Tony, OOC Rhodey, OOC Pepper, and OOC Stephen. And that is why I consider these fics bad.

There may be exceptions to this, but when I was still attempting the tag in 2019, I never found a fic under the tag that was an exception. I stopped trying the last 3 or so years. And unless you're an author who's written in that tag and you want me to read your story and want to try to change my mind (because you're a masochist? why would you want to do this to yourself?), don't send me those fics. 99% I'm going to find them bad.

I'm not gonna subject those authors to the above opinion because they enjoy the black/white world and they have a huge readership who loves that crack. And good for them! That doesn't change my opinion that I think it's lousy writing because characterization is 70% of my opinion of a fic. If you have all this OOC characterization in a non-crack/parody fic, I just won't have a high opinion. And I'll say it in my own space under a cut, but I'm not going to search you out anymore - I haven't since 2019 (early 2020 was the cut off). Writers have the right to write what's popular - and I can dislike that popular content. But it's a lucrative readership and if that black and white world brings you joy, then all the more power to you.

Important: Not character-friendly fics are different from Dark!character fics. Dark character fics acknowledge that in canon, the characters are written as protagonists and heroes, and the author is purposefully changing this. In not character friendly fics, the author is usually inventing something stupid or terrible (and often enough ooc) for the character to have done/not done to strengthen the position of their chosen protagonist, or is ignoring canon traits of the character to, again, strengthen the position of their chosen protagonist. This is especially seen with Steve.

Honorable mention: I dislike the majority of fics (no idea of percentage but very likely over 50%) labeled Supreme Family, *strictly* due to how Peter is treated. Let me explain.

Peter is an incredibly independent teenager living in NYC with his own friends and his own brains and solo superheroing the majority of the time. These fics have a tendency to erase all of this, making him overly reliant on Tony, making him act as if he's aged between 8 to 12 rather than 15 to 18, and erasing his connection to May, Ned, and MJ. His whole life is made secondary to be part of the Tony Stark fanclub and it's *weird*. Peter is so much more than his connection to Tony and fans of this trope sometimes forget this.

I'll give a real world example. There's a large age gap between my sister and myself, so I got to see her in her teenage years while I was an adult. She's smart, fiercely independent, and had good friends and extra curricular activities throughout high school just like Peter did. We had family dinner together on occasion but she wanted to be doing her own thing as much as possible. She'd text my parents for the "Hey I'm alive" check ins but otherwise? She was AWOL as much as she could get away with.

Peter may be less so, especially if May insists on dinner together at least a couple times a week with his form of extracurricular activities, but I cannot emphasize enough how Peter having his own life is so important to his character and him being around Tony most of his free time outside of school and Spider-Man is *weird*. Even if he likes him!

This is just one teenager in my example, but a staple of teenagers is finding their independence as they grow into adulthood. Clinging to other adult figures does not tend to be the trend with those who have a big independence streak.

Peter in canon is all about establishing his independence - and you could see this especially throughout all of Homecoming. His independence is integral to his character. And if Tony was his adopted dad in the fic, I'd say him always hanging out with him is doubly weird because, again, independence. It's a major part of most teenagers and it's very well established in Peter's personality.

So yeah. Fic writers please stop writing him like a 10 year old unless he's actually 10 in the fic. Let him live his own life in the Supreme Family trope. Let him go out with friends and do after school clubs and not go to Tony's lab after school every day of the week because it's just not him and his movies established that very well. Let him get annoyed at the tracking and let him yell at his parental figures because conflict is normal. Let him be a teenager.

(And as someone who loves Found Family, I can't emphasize enough how much that theme falls short if the characters within the family forget their independence and lives outside of the family. It's just no fun.)

So yeah. Have all these spicy hot takes!