#cant unfollow them i know them in real life

[nexttothelamp]

bruh

[megaclaudiolis]

。

[divinesolas]

Ignored

Summary: Based on two requests; You had been best friends with Jacaerys since you were kids. But when he gets a girlfriend and joins the football team in college your whole life gets turned upside down and he's suddenly ditched you. A year after you are confronted by him and emotions spill to the surface.

w.c: 2.7k

c.w: Porn with plot, sub!jace, hand job, overstimulation, p in v, unprotected sex (WRAP IT UP), car sex, im not good at angry sex or mean stuff guys so sorry,

masterlist

One year. one fucking year since you’ve last spoken to him. You never imagined the two of you would end up like this.

He gets on the college football team and gets some hot girlfriend and suddenly he’s too good for you. You doubt he’s even noticed. It was slow to start, he started being busy during your weekly hang outs, then it would slip his mind to text you back, then he just suddenly stopped texting you. You had been replaced, you would always spend the holidays with his family but this past year you had seen Lucerys post on his insta holiday pictures and she was there instead. Everyone else in his family had reached out to you at some point. usually something along the lines of a happy holidays and that they hoped to see you soon, that they missed you. They even wished you happy birthday. He didn’t.

You had gotten to the point you stopped answering his family's texts, it made you feel sick when Lucerys asked if you would come to his birthday party and you didn’t have the heart to reply to him. You stopped checking their socials, even going as far as to mute them but you didn’t have the heart to unfollow them. then it would get too real, that the people you’ve considered family since you were basically a baby were no longer around.

You wish you didn’t miss him. You wish when started at your aunts gravestone he was not the face that appeared in your mind when you wished you had someone to comfort you. She had died six months ago, you hadn’t even bothered to text him about it. He met her a couple times, but its not like he would care now.

You do not cry for her anymore. Having come far enough in your grief, but you feel yourself come to a halt when you are walking through the graveyard and are stopped by a familiar family.

“Y/n?” You feel a knot grow in your throat. Why were they here? you could see lucerys was holding some flowers. “Hello.” What else are you supposed to say? You are frozen in place as lucerys walks over and throws his arms around you. “I missed you.” You try not to let your tears spill down your face as Lucerys pulls back and looks at you alarmed, “Are you okay?”

You laugh and cover your face with your hands, unable to even describe what you’re feeling. “You’re so tall.” Your voice cracks as you speak and he slaps you on the shoulder. “’Course i am, had to get taller than mr prince charming over there.”

You don’t want to look at him. You wish he was not even there. But you cannot help yourself the way your eyes drift to where Lucerys is referring to and you wish you hadn’t. He is as beautiful as he was the last day you saw him, he looks like he just came out of a romcom, a long trench coat covering him and a bouquet of flowers in his hands. You have no clue what he’s thinking, his face giving nothing away, cant take your eyes off him. The way his eyes have a gloss over them as he takes a couple steps towards you.

You swiftly turn away from his and notice rhaenyra standing at your side and she reaches out a grips your forearm. “It is so wonderful to see you dear.” You nod and smile at her, “It is always a pleasure Ms. Targaryen.” she hits your arm, “You stay away for a couple months and suddenly I’m Ms. Targaryen, call me rhaenyra dear you know better.” You want to correct her, tell her its been over a year. yet you don't, only nodding and apologizing to her.

“What are you doing here?” Its the first words he’s said to you in god knows how long. You swear your knees almost crumple at the sound of his voice. You want to punch him, spit in his face, you wish you hated him. “My aunt died.” You spit at the ground, you voice coming out angrier than you indented it to.

The people around you immediately flood around to give their condolences. You thank them, Lucerys especially kept you in a deep hug and mentioned how they came today to see rhaenyra's father but they'll make sure to stop by your aunt’s grave.

He says nothing. nothing at all. You hate him. You hate him so much. But you cant say no when they ask if you’ll join them to see viserys and your aunt. you cant even say no when they offer you to join them for dinner.

you two say nothing to each other, not until you say you’ll drive in your car on the way there and turn to walk towards it, still having the map to their house memorized until you are stopped, a hand gripping on your forearm.

“Can i ride with you?” You don't turn around to look at him. Continuing to stare straight ahead, your heart and head churning. You want to tell him no, that you don't wish to ever even see him again. “Please.”

“Fine.”

But you're a pussy. the biggest punk in the whole world as you watch him slide into the passenger seat as you close the drivers door. A silence fills the space between you two, you don't want to speak, a part of you hopes it will stay that way.

“What happened with us?” You harshly break at the red light and whip your head towards him. Rage boiling at your skin as you hiss at him, “What happened? What do you mean what happened? You're the one who ditched me!”

“What the fuck are you taking about?” “Oh so you’re just gonna act like you didn't fucking stop talking to me after you a girlfriend? What is her name? i don't even fucking know because you never introduced us.” A loud honk behind you forced you to turn your head away from him and back on the road, you swear your knuckles turned white from the pressure you were squeezing it.

“i-” “No. Because you know what Jace. Fuck you. Fuck you and your stupid face and your stupid girlfriend and your stupid friends because you fucking left me. You have no reason to sit around and ask me what the fuck happened between us because it was all because of you. i put in the effort to reach out i even sent you a fucking gift for your birthday because you couldn't spare the time to hang with me and you don't even text me a happy fucking birthday?!? Fuck you man.”

Your hands slam down on the wheel in frustration as you clench your jaw, the fucking nerve of this guy. You don’t even spare him another glance and he doesn't dare to say anything else for awhile. the drive is long, they were buried far out from your homes so the drive was over an hour.

it takes twenty minutes before he says anything. “I’m sorry.” It comes out strained, if you looked at him he would probably be crying but you do not dare look at him. “I wish i could explain to you why i did it, why i acted like that. But I’m sorry. I’m sorry i just think i liked the attention, i liked having people fawn over me. And her, fuck i don't know, i liked her sure, but she fucking cheated on me with one of the guys on the team, told me she only got with me to get closer to him. Its not an excuse, i should have never put what we had down the drain for someone that never really mattered because you, you matter to me more than anyone else. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry, ill say it forever because i don't deserve your forgiveness.”

You pull over into a road side parking lot because you couldn't see the road anymore. Your eyes filled with tears as your shoulders shook with silent sobs, “I am sorry i made you feel this way, that you couldn't even come to me when she died, i liked it, i remember she gave me the toy car display i still have in my room fuck i can't even imagine how you must feel. I miss you. I miss you so much.”

You put your head against the wheel and allow yourself to sob. This is all you’ve wanted to hear for so long that now you have no clue how to feel. You want to tell him to fuck off. That he has no reason to be begging for your forgiveness now.

“Jacaerys,” You swear you hear it wrong, that you must be confused. He whimpers. “No please,” “Its dragged out in a way that has your stomach churning and you shift in your seat. “Don’t call me Jacaerys, Jace please.”

You must be strong. You cannot give into to his sad puppy eyes and cries. Yet you look over to him and feel your resolve crumble. He has tears streaming down his face. He’s looking at you. Has he been looking at you this whole time? “You left me Jace.” He lets out a trembled breath as he dares with shaky hands to grab yours. “I'm sorry. I will beg you to forgive me till the end of time because i will never deserve it. I need you.”

Your heart pounds against your chest as the two of you stare at one another. You feel your hands shake in his grip as the two of you unknowingly move closer to each other.

“I realized after i found out what she had done i was more upset about the fact you were not there more than anything. She had begged me to take her back but the only thing i could think about was you. I was so stupid and so blind i will never forgive myself. You are everything to me.”

“Jace,” He cups your cheeks and lets out a trembled breath, “I was a fool to let you go. I will never make that mistake again,” You cannot believe what is happening, he does not truly mean what you think he’s saying does he? “I had months to think it over. I am so madly in love with you. If you do not feel the same i will act like this never happened and we can just go back to being friends or even if you cannot stomach being around me we can just never talk but-”

He lets out a surprised moan as you shove your lips against his and eagerly pressed his lips against yours. He a lot more vocal than you had expected him to be, eagerly humming against your lips as his hands have moved to your neck.

He lets out a shocked gasp when you push him back into his seat and looks at you with wide eyes as you climb over his lap, pulling the level to have him lay over his back and simply stare at him as you hover above him. He whimpers as you grab the front of his shirt and pull him towards your face, “This is for me. Not you. Right?” He eagerly nods, more than willing to take anything you’ll give him.

He whines as you unbutton his black dress pants and waste no time shoving your hand past his boxers and gripping onto his dick. His head is thrown backwards as you rub your thumb against his tip, ignoring his mumbles until enough precum has dripped down onto your hand before you begin vigorously pumping him up and down.

You do not stop even as he’s asking you to slow down. Well you do, but it is always right before he’s about to come. You do this again. and again. and again. He feels like he’s about to burst, the stimulation is too much for him to bare.

“Please.” You tilt your head at him as he grips the front of your button down shirt. “What do you want?” Your words are spoken like he a stranger approaching you on the street, he whimpers and shoves his head into your chest, his tears threatening to spill out. “Please,”

“awe are you so fucked out you have no clue what you’re talking about huh?” He’s babbling nonsense as you feel his tears pool into your shirt. You fully remove your hands off him for the fourth time and he thinks he might crack. “Please no I’m sorry I’m sorry please please just let me,,” His words trail off as he watches you fully release him from his pants and boxers, his breath shaky as he watches you pool up your shirt and move to hover above him.

“Please please.” “Shut the fuck up.” He whimpers as his tip presses against your folds but you don’t him in enter yet, simply allowing his tip to be dragged up and down your slit. He throws his head back as the tears continue to flow down his face, he can’t take this, his hips rise up to try and thrust into you but you hold him down and spit at him. “You don’t know how to behave slut.”

He lets out a surprised gurgle of sounds when you suddenly slam all the way down onto him and lightly slap him across the face. “Are you happy now slut? You happy your little loser friend is fucking you stupid?”

He can barely speak as you begin to bounce up and down on him. He’s dreamed of this for much longer than he’d like to admit but this is much better than anything he could have imagined. The way your lightly let out sounds of delight are like music to his ears. He wishes he could say something but over the heat that flows over his body and the way he feels your hands slip under his shirt and begin to rub up and down his chest he can’t find the words.

He keeps his hands at his side, not knowing if he is allowed to touch you not wishing to upset you more than he already has. You notice the way his hands twitch and slightly raise as if he wants to reach out to you. You slow down for a moment to grab his hands and place them on your chest, a wordless exchange between the two of you as he stares at you in wonder. So much love fills his gaze you almost flush with embarrassment. You begin to pick up your pace once again as he fondles you over your clothes.

The pit grows larger in his stomach much faster than he would like but due to the overstimulation and the overflowing of emotions he’s on the edge. “I’m so close.”

“Hold it.” He whines and watches as one of your hands slip under your skirt, “You think you should be allowed to cum before me?” He shakes his head, of course not, he doesn’t deserve too.

He swears he almost cums from your blissed out face alone, but he is surprised he manages to contain himself until he feels you throb and your essence drips around him. You slowly lift off him and pump him until his cum drips down your hands.

The car windows are foggy, you have no clue how long you’ve been out here but the sun as begun to set as you allow yourself to fall against his chest, feeling the way his heart beats erratically as his arms come to wrap around you.

“I don’t forgive you,” He feels his heart drop as he gulps, bracing himself for you to lift off him and drop him off at his house, never to speak to him again. “But i think i can one day, you just have to take me out on a couple dates first.”

He grins.

Perm Jacaerys taglist

@tyronesien @itsbookworm987 @cruelworldlana @smurfelle @ireneispunk @hxtd @venmondiese @urmomsgirlfriend1 @aegonswife @jacesvelaryons

[generalpalacefishgoop]

You know the posts recently about bbh neg on twter, the timing of it with that going on, makes me want to hurl, they don't give a shit about "victims" or the real issues. They just want to dunk on the next cc they hate using the current "momentum".

You know what, I say let them go ahead and try to "cancel" Bad, really, go ahead. They're just regurgitating shit DSMP fans has said over the years again and again about Bad. Its fcking funny actually. Oh not forgetting they had to invent new ones or ones THAT THEIR FAVES HAVE DONE TOO BTW, to "cancel" Bad. To think I was looking forward to QSMP fans being "healthier" or "better" than DSMP ones, oh boy am I sorely disappointed.

Let them run their mouths about Bad. Cuz I'm 100% sure the CCs , QSMP admins, and Quackity give 0 shit about them. Etoiles knows and has already expressed how he knows that Bad is overly hated by the fandom and how he receives neg on the daily. Despite knowing that, he's still cordial with Bad. And he even expressed how he tries to not be "angry" or "frustrated" at Bad or else the parasocial fucks will come running to "defend" him from "evil" BBH when he has said a million times over that its not a fcking big deal, and hes just expressing himself NOT IN A NEG WAY. but noooo parasocial fucks be like "oh no my skunkrly wrunkly his feelings got hurt oh no" same shit with foolish fans. Fcking blind af. Esp the new ones who hasnt experienced the prank wars in dsmp. Fcking joyless fucks who cant handle a fcking block game that theyre not even playing. But thankfully, Etoiles stopped being so concerned, and well, yk with Foolish lmao same old same old.

(Disclaimer: SOME FANS NOT ALL, IM TALKING ABOUT THE TOXIC PARASOCIAL FUCKS, YES EVEN THE BIG ACCOUNTS ON TWITTER WITH THOUSANDS OF FOLLOWERS. You know who. Big numbers doesn't mean they're more RIGHT. A parasocial fuck is a parasocial fuck. Also, when I say parasocial, I mean the ones who are toxic and project themselves onto the CC. Being parasocial is fine, if it's the healthy kind, if you know what I mean)

I digress, there's no fcking unfollows or subtweets from CCs to Bad, unlike with D or F. In fact, some CCs and CLOSE FRIENDS of Bad's have always praised Bad and defended him TO THIS DAY. If that is not enough of an indication of how unproblematic he is, Idk what else to say. Just fuck off and live a life in constant misery and hatred ig. That's why don't respond to fucks like that. Just mute em. They can yap all they want but it means SHIT ALL if you don't see it. BBH's community is WAY WAY smaller than the whole fandom (and theres wayyy more toxic fucks) so bbhs community saying shit back to the toxic shits will also mean SHIT ALL. They CLEARLY don't watch Bad anyways so what's the point. Better way to deal with this shit is fight the misinformation, that's all. Spread more positivity and give ppl FULL context and CORRECT information. If you see some shit against Bad, report it and send it to whatever ban list qsmp uses. Send it to mods or something. Ik that Bagi's discord has something like that.

Oh but ppl be like /rp or /lh or "it's just my opinion", who gives a shit. Still report them. We're not dumb. The mods or whoever admins are not dumb. That negative toxic fuck smell on it, is fcking obvious enough.

STOP GIVING THEM ENGAGEMENTS. We can happily stay in each others bubbles without ever talking to each other, AND THAT IS FINE. Don't let the negative fucks in. Mute and report them, and I guarantee you, that fcking stranger on the Internet, you'll forget within DAYS. those fuckers won't even exist to you, vice versa.

THEIR WORDS HOLD NO POWER OVER YOU OR THE QSMP COMMUNITY. KEEP THE QSMP COMMUNITY HEALTY AND SAFE. Fuck them toxic shits.

[futturmangamez]

Hey futturfriends! Here for another important reminder/announcement🌰

Hope everyones doing well first of all. I know lately a lot of us have been going through it. Wanted to remind a lot of you that I am in fact a person behind this account just like the rest of you. I'm not perfect and do go thru some things personally. Some days I am very active on my phone, some days not very much, and other days not at all. Please do not get offended or take it personally if I dont post/answer your messages right away sometimes. Yes my dms are always open..apologies if I also suck at answering the few c ai like scenarios in my messages as josh. And to you guys as well, please remember to take breaks from social media if u can/need to. Social media can be an escape for us, but also poison. Go outside, stay hydrated, and put yourself first always. After that, pls remember to tell the people you care about that you love them. Please. Life is so short. Just because someone is posting positive stuff on social media, it absolutely does not mean there is positive stuff going on in their head. Check in on your people and stay in touch as much as you could. A simple check in (a real check in) can save someones life.

On another note, as much as I'd like to interact and show love to everyone on my tumblr, this account is very nsfw, as the show future man is. I would very much appreciate if you do not follow/interact with this account if you are 14 and under. I know it's scary putting your age on social media and theres no force to, but I do recommend putting if you are an adult or not somewhere in your bio or intro👌Also if you have no posts, especially no pfp I will assume you are a bot and remove you. Everyone else, you are responsible for your own media consumption no matter who you are. If you are an older minor saying absolutely gross disgusting things, do not be upset if I remove you. Yes nsfw asks+dms are still allowed but if you're ONLY hitting Josh up for sex stuff, I will get annoyed:/(even if Josh is not acting annoyed lmao)

Plus, I'd appreciate if you dont bring hate or negativity to my page. If you have a problem with this account or me personally, message me:) let's talk it out. Sorry for a bit of inactivity lately. To my new followers, I used to be much more active lol..ik theres a lot of posts and reblogs on my page but theres no rule that says you cant scroll thru my page for some silly old posts😆🤭

Sorry that was so much. If you got to the end thank you for reading. If you understand feel free to like this post and if not, feel free to ignore or unfollow respectfully. Sending you love, positive vibes, and virtual hugs🌹💜🍯-🃏

[jinxcdd]

the writer is not the character. the character is not the voice actor.

this apparently needs to be spelt out to people.

you can still like something even if someone in the background is problematic. it's being able to separate fiction from reality.

look at jk rowling and how she got cancelled for one comment. harry potter is still loved by many. michael jackson - how many of you still listen to his music when the allegations came out? James Gunn - how many of you still watch the guardians of the galaxy movies and think their great?

What i'm getting at is the product is not the person behind it. you can enjoy something without endorsing the bad parts.

someone saying they like the voice of a character is not them admitting they like the voice actor - they just enjoy the voice. as someone who is audio sensitive there are some podcasts that i just cant listen to because i dont like the voice behind it - doesnt mean i dont like the person or the show... it's pained me before because i really enjoyed the show but i couldn't stand the voice. it works the other way.

liking harry potter doesnt mean you have to like jk rowling or endorse the comments she made. just appreciate the art and move on.

this is the internet.

this is a place to relax and escape.

a show is just a show.

a character is just a character.

if you dont like that character that's fine no one's going to hunt you down for it.

so don't start harassing people for a character that they do like!

Just skip past that blog - unfollow - block - or just dont follow in the first place. no one is forcing you to have anything to do with them.

you dont have to make everyone aware of the behind the scenes. let people enjoy a FICTIONAL character.

we all read fiction. we all read books/fanfics that have massive redflags on it. god knows the amount of trigger warnings in the books i have read but do we all enjoy a morally grey character that have the biggest red flags ? yes. would we go near them in real life? fuck no.

We know the difference.

grow up and let cancel culture die the death it's meant to. we can all wear our socks how we like. get over yourselves and MOVE THE FUCK ON. it's boring now and im sure im not the only one that is done with this PATHETIC behaviour.

[unabashedlyinlove]

About Jai, Goob and other fandom grifters

I have been off tumblr for a while, but keeping up with things happening on Twitter. This is a post I made there and want to share here too:

Its time for people to actually walk the fucking walk. "Oh I didnt know Jai&co were so bad". In which world do live you dint notice it before? But now that you know what they do, cancel your subscription to their Patreon, leave their discord servers, unfollow their Twitters/tik toks/ Tumblrs, stop buying their merchandise.

Stop signal boosting or donating to their GFM. Like cant you see youre being grifted? "Oh I need pay rent & bills". No. Theyre using your hard earned money to go to Conventions. If not going to conventions, they use it to sit at home every day making videos and posts with the malicious intent of playing with people's emotions, worsening their mental healthy issues, smearing innocent people's reputation and even suicide-bait!

Take away their engagement and means of making money with stalking/ bullying/misinforming /trying to doxx/sending death thread to actors and people in fandom.

Because THE MONEY YOU GIVE/DONATE TO THEM SPONSORS BULLYING, HATRED & PAIN. YOUR MONEY! YOU!

By stopping all of this, youre actually making fandom safe, not only for yourself but for others too! Its time for us to make a stand against them, make them understand all that hurt and pain they caused people and that it all has consequences.

Theyre not going to die of hunger or go homeless because of it. This is MANIPULATIVE tactic to keep people as paying customers. Without your financial support, Theyll have to go back to real world and get themselves jobs and live a healthy life instead of keeping on this full of hatred existence.

Please, STOP amplifying their voices. reblog this to reach more people and educate the fandom friends that still believe them.

[isa-ghost]

hey it's the anon who asked what dr*m did,

I decided to do my own research (mainly cause I was curious) but... I can't find much? let me rephrase it - I did find the allegations from 6ish months ago, that he's going to court with one(?) of them, but that's... all? I didn't find the court's verdict, confirmations, or him admitting either... and any post or video I find has both the OP and the comments mostly on his side and believing that it's either not true or true but not grooming, even people who say they're not his fans or don't even like him.

so Im not sure if the confirmation didn't reach youtube or if I'm searching wrong or something?

but honestly while researching I realized that I cant stand him lmao, gotta agree with some comments I read - he made a mistake by showing more of his personality online, looks like any time he can handle a situation wrong/respond wrong he does it

so dunno, guess I didnt find the confirmation but at least now I don't find his old minecraft videos interesting anymore so theres that

Yeah he can't act properly to save his fucking life

Also I think most of the threads on Twitter and stuff that have all the proof he's guilty/etc is probably long buried, unfortunately. You could probably try to ask around saying you're trying to get the whole picture but tbh it's not a huge deal if you can't. You can try searching my blog but Tumblr sucks with that shit. The fact that this and his other controversies have been buried and lost to the void of the internet is typical white boy with a monstrously big platform shit so I'm not surprised. I never heard any details about court (prob for legal reasons) or a conviction either. All I know is there was screenshot proof from the victim that they talked, and Dr*m confirmed the screenshots were real but didn't say anything about other details. But those details literally can't be false if the screenshots & the shit said in them are true.

Anyway, as far as his other bullshit goes:

People found old kkk meme edits on his yt account through the wayback machine. More than once if I'm not mistaken

He has a history of defending himself using the r slur

He cheated "on accident" in a speedrun (the least important thing ever but everyone always brings it up)

He claimed he was going to donate all proceeds during pride month to lgbt+ charities & he'd do charity streams all month but never did

He defended himself about replying to haters, which would send thousands of his toxic stans after the person getting them doxxed/death threats/etc and he refused to address that it was irresponsible of him bc he was too entitled to immaturely clap back at the antis. Even other ccs, like B/itzel called him out about shit related to how he uses his platform irresponsibly & he unfollowed & shaded them like a bitch baby

The whole "accidental" copycat shit with QSMP/USMP and basically softcore stalking Q/uackity online.

His "apologies" for all of the above fucking sucked in multiple ways. And that's just 2021-Now shit I can remember off the top of my head, I lost my Twitter in May last year so now I get my info from people's posts about it on here or links to tweets.

Everyone largely suspects he spontaneously reignited d/smp lore & started the finale to cover up the groomer thing bc he has a history of doing smth "new and cool" every time he causes drama to divert attention and avoid accountability.

He's also suspected of suddenly rewriting the d/smp finale to paint his Irredeemable Abuser Villain Up Until The Last Stream as a sympathetic poor baby out of nowhere and wrote that his victim, c!Tommy apologized to him, which sends a HORRIBLE message about abusive relationships. T/ommy and T/ubbo have both subtly mentioned not liking the finale and that Dr*m had AWFUL communication during the last like 6+ months of the smp.

He also suddenly showed up in T/ubbo's chat lurking while T/ubbo happened to be mentioning he'd do his own research on the grooming situation instead of blindly siding with Dr*m and it was some shit out of a horror movie is2g, he suddenly dmed T/ubbo out of nowhere during it on discord saying they'd talk about it after T/ubbo wasn't streaming. Basically sounds like he was gonna bias T/ubbo about his innocence. Like he hadn't been in chat all stream long but SUDDENLY he was there the second the topic came up. But the d/smp ccs also can't say anything about the situation since it's a legal matter, so a handful of ccs have just stated/implied they don't support him other ways

He only quit MCC bc he threw a tantrum about how he couldn't practice for it but now that MCC island exists, people were getting better than him. He's habitually a sore loser about that kinda shit

He's got that whole weird "is he, isn't he" bullshit going on about him being lgbt. I personally think he's just catering to his stupid d/n/f shippers bc they like to truth their relationship & sexuality all the time and he's never explicitly said he's bi or smth. He's just vaguely been like "yeeeaahhhh I mostly like girls like 99% but maaaayyybeee I like guys idkkkk. 🤪" But he's also done that multiple times so who tf knows. I'm not gonna fully dismiss him & I understand no one including me is entitled to his specific sexuality, but he has garbage credibility on like everything so I'm neutral on the matter and find it hard to believe him

Not directly him related, but his stans went on a long and horrifying witch hunt on Twitter during the kkk ordeal doxxing, death threatening & harassing ENTIRE mcyt subtwts who spoke out against him and called him out on his racism, performative activism, shitty apology, etc. For example, I was part of S/neeg's subtwt and all my mutuals and me had to go private to avoid getting doxxed. It felt like being raided in some dystopian ass horror film. Entire subtwts were going private, panicking, paranoid they'd get outed & stalked & harassed by people just for condemning racism, raising Black voices, etc. It was borderline traumatic to some people, I know people who lost sleep over it bc they were so afraid.

That's all I can think of off the top of my head but the end of 2021 to early 2022 was a fucking nightmare between him being an immature entitled piece of shit and his stans blindly defending him and going out of their way to endanger people who rightfully opposed him.

[fefairys]

definitely something to be said about the privilege of having queer community in real life. cause not everywhere has places where u can go and easily/safely meet other queer people... so there are a lot of people online who are in echo chambers bc they only surround themselves with people like them and they dont really know any queer ppl irl (through no fault of their own) and so they end up only knowing about perspectives of themself and people who agree with them on everything.

in real life queer communities youre not going to agree with everyone on everything, but thats a good thing. we're all from different backgrounds and have different experiences, different upbringings, etc. online if you disagree with someone you can just unfollow them, but if you're in a community irl and you disagree with someone you cant just kick them out of their damn community. you have to listen to each others perspectives and find common ground. and sometimes agree to disagree on certain things. i feel very lucky to be able to be exposed to so many different queer experiences through my irl queer friends that i wouldn't have if my only exposure to the queer community was the people i choose to surround myself with online.

[tenderperversion]

your post about internet friendships is so real. ive had mutuals for years that i cant bring myself to unfollow even though i actively dislike their current fandoms or whatever. i just have to filter out the fandom tag or, if absolutely necessary, filter out their username.

wow youre even more of a people pleaser than me i think i would draw the line at filtering out someones username if it was that severe i would unfortunately just unmutual them ... but yeah most of the time i try to blacklist what i need to and i dont break mutuals even if i only like < 30% of someones content - i can still like their personal posts + maybe one day we will have a common interest again - i guess i subconsciously treat people in my phone like real people and you wouldnt unfriend someone in real life if they got into something that is kind of annoying to you right. but it depends im pretty picky about who i follow in the first place so i dont know. feels like its a very subjective thing, im just kind of a lovepilled attachmentmaxxer at the end of the day. the people likerrr even.

[olderthannetfic]

I really don't get the issue with tagging stuff like goncharov as unreality, lmao.

"Oh why can't you just google it??" Because nonnie, having an entire website act like this one pretend thing is real can be disorientating even if the words on the Google search page say that thing doesn't exist, especially before there were articles specifying it was just a joke. Hell, i don't have any particular health condition that would require this type of tagging for my own continued wellbeing, but it was still extremely disorientating to log on one day and see everyone talking about this one thing as if it were a fully fledged movie while at the same time being told it didn't actually exist. I can only imagine how it felt like to people who are liable to experience hardship when confronted with this type of scenario.

Like, if you personally dont want to tag for a certain thing on your own blog, then all the power to you. Whoever doesnt like the way you do things can just unfollow you, no harm no foul. But people taking that idea a step further and saying "Oh, if stuff like goncharov upsets you then why are you on the internet in the first place?" is like me asking people with allergies or other diet restrictions why they go to restaurants every one in a while. "Like, hm actually sweetie, why are you eating out if you're intolerant to gluten/allergic to x? You cant expect the world to cater to your needs :/". "Why should I put an epilepsy warning in this movie or video? If you don't want to trigger an epilepsy attack the you shouldn't be watching videos in the first place.", so on and so forth.

"Oh but those are serious!" Not necessarily. An allergy can just leave you feeling itchy for a while, and lactose intolerance can just give you a stomach ache, depending on the person. "Oh, but those are physical conditions!" So? Why should that make them more worthy of your considerations? They are still health conditions that need to be accounted for and looked out for. And the people who have those health conditions should be able to go about their life without fear.

It's actually not that weird to ask the people that share your space for some kindness and consideration when it comes to dealing with your specific needs, especially if those needs can prevent you from coming into harm. As long as, of course, "asking people to tag a type of post" doesn't snowball into, I don't know, insults or demands or what not. I haven't seen that sort of post or discourse yet, but I'm just leaving the caveat to be safe lmao

--

This is becoming tedious. There's a disability need here that is clashing with the fundamental nature of the activity. People will make various choices about what to do about fundamentally incompatible needs. The end.

[finnleyandsillys]

I really need to speak about a certain someone on this platform. Someone I regret calling friend and trying to find a just answer to why they did these things. I specifically want the people related or close to this person to DNI.

I'm going through something right now as of real life and this is something I feel I have to bring attention to know.

One of my Ex mutuals was online stalking and admitted it openly. The person they had done this too was an adult on the platform they had a platonic crush over of which they chased after this person and talked to them constantly. They're a minor. They got drunk and texted them. Made them uncomfortable and proceeded to lie about being other people and friends of themselves to talk to the person and apologize after multiple statements of wanting them to go away. They made multiple accounts to stalk the person but they were all blocked shortly after being made.

I don't think the victim of this would like to be known- nor the person who did these things. But they know who they are and I don't want people asking me why I chose to disconnect permanently from this person. I'm not calling them out… because honestly they call themselves out enough.

But with the stalking, lying, and manipulation, I cant see myself being friends. So if you are close to the person I am talking about please unfollow or block me, or might be and don't know who im talking please dm me to ask.

And too them :

If you feel like making shit about putting yourself down for something that was your fault- dont victimize yourself. You know what you did, you have to live with the consequences. It's a mental decision to do what you did.

Go to an asylum you sick monster.

[sapphos-darlings]

hey. im a lesbian and lately ive been teally frustrated at the uptick in people calling themselves "bi lesbians" and talking about how lesbians can have sex with men if they want to

how have we fallen this far? i just cant understand it anymore.

Hello, Anon!

I'm not sure if there's actually an uptick or if it's people you follow and the circles you run in, because I am familiar with the term from a while back too, but haven't seen that recently.

At the risk of being controversial, I'm going to recommend you just block and move on instead of arguing with homophobes. As a fellow lesbian, I know the frustration and hurt that comes when we encounter homophobia within the LGBT community, but I've found there's nothing to really win by arguing with random people online.

This might be a strange comfort, but it's really nothing new to despair over. There's always been misunderstandings, different interests and agendas, and even prejudice and conflict within the community, since we are only people. This is just homophobia with a new coat of paint and a funny hat, we've dealt with that before, and so we're going to deal with this too.

If anything, we can take comfort in knowing that nothing is going to change the truth that female homosexuality does exist. We as lesbians are a real group of people, and no matter what wordplay or labels get used and confused, the simple truth that you either are homosexual or you are not will prevail. Instead of arguing, we just need to speak up about our experiences more and louder.

So don't worry too much, and don't get too discouraged. Unfollow and block annoying people on the internet and don't let them cast a shadow on your everyday life. No lesbian is ever going to feel desire for a man, so it's not like there's some highly inconspicuous infiltration operation happening in lesbian circles. If you're in a lesbian-exclusive group you can just ask that person to leave, if you thought you're on a date with another lesbian you can just end it and walk away, and if you're in a WLW space you can roll your eyes and not be friends with that person. If anything, feel sad that some bi women struggle with internalized biphobia so much that they distance themselves from other bisexuals and their own culture.

-Lavender

[questionablepastries]

large vent

tw: suicidal ideation

I need to type this out for my own sanity. But also the entire purpose is on the off chance that someone reads this and, in some way, relates to what I'm experiencing. Not the entirety of it, but a part of it, would be enough for me to justify sharing my experiences. Normally, I would have written this out in a diary but something tells me that by sharing it and letting people they are not alone would be more beneficial than keeping this to myself. To preface everything, these are first world problems. All of this spiraling - ok first off my behavior towards what is really the most minor of all triggers is annoyingly blown over. All that happened was that someone i thought i could have befriended more given time and more chats- just one day decided i wasnt worth being (and i hate typing this) mutuals with.

What made me laugh was the idea of describing my lil hissy fit emotional tantrum to my boomer absolutely not online coworkers and they would all most likely laugh about it. But the more i thought about losing this mutual, the question i kept going back to was why? why was i blowing this out of proportion? what even caused this big of a reaction in me? well first off, i was really riding on the hope to get to know them better. i really wanted to be friends with them. the great thing about online friendships is that it eliminates any barriers that would be present if someone tried to make friends with you in person. you dont worry about smelling bad, looking weird, stuttering, bad posture, etc. so truly i was thinking if our interests aligned enough and we cracked some jokes we had something, that could blossom into something cool. instead it didnt and they just dropped me entirely out of nowhere, and me being my silly self thinks somehow its my fault.

honestly though im sure they were going through something - like they would constantly post about wanting ppl to unfollow them and me going oh that cant be about me surely, nah it was most definitely about me. i cant nail down what it was though, did i not reach out enough? did i joke too much? was i too little was i too much. unfortunately, with the lack of a physical barrier im taking this as a personal fault that I Really messed something up. Something about me as a person is inherently undesirable and therefore not worth putting in the time or effort to talk to -- there must have been something off about me for this to have played out the way it did, right? I keep running scenarios in my head like oh what if i reached out more, or what if i responded in a different way that one time -- as if it can change the outcome of what has happened but. all of this. all of this emotional self inflicting stupid reaction im having stems from my own struggles in real life to make friends. this has been a running trend all my 28 years (yeah 28!) and.. to bring myself back to reality and to keep my emotions from spilling over. I came up with a good strategy.

I always ground myself by saying to myself in a silly voice as if one would calm down a pet "are you punishing yourself for having become the person you are today due to your shitty environment/upbringing that you had no control over" and "are you punishing yourself for factors out of your control Again? eye roll come on now" and thats literally how ive been grounding myself this entire time whenever i get really uncomfortable with how i am as a person in real life. and yeah honestly my upbringing sucks ass it sucks soooo much. i have no extended family and it has never been more obvious since i became conscious as a toddler to this day that my extended family on both sides absolutely does not give a shit about me nor my immediate family. my immediate family being my mom and my sister. my mom and my sister are my ONLY family. side note and i mean this semi-jokingly: if you have a family fuck you. when my coworkers talk about their uncles or their aunts or their grandparents or how they were raised by their grandparents or how they hung out with their cousins and how they went on vacations, or how they spent time with their dad. i feel this massive vacancy in my heart that is a placeholder of what i want so desperately to have happened. i feel like those scenarios they describe to me are just not possible, families only exist on tv shows, and christmas specials, thats not a real thing. it has never been a reality for me. unrelatable. all of it. and as a first generation child from immigrants (lets not even get into my dad we havent spoken to him in over a decade) my only memories are of food stamps, being smelly in school because my mom could literally not afford the time to take care of me or afford a baby sitter, my stuttering, my inability to join extracurricular activities due to money, all of it added up to my ostracization throughout the entirety of my school years.

& as a child on welfare it was very much drilled into me that the only escape from poverty is through education and i took that very seriously. im a fucking scientist now i passed the national exam to get where i am. where i failed socially didnt matter to me back then as long as i had good grades, grades were All that mattered to me. and i succeeded. but not without some draw backs. ive always been an awkward person. i have a couple of friends few and far between in person. its literally three people that i keep in contact with in real life and i am extremely grateful that they reach out to me but its also like. i gotta do better lol one of them forgot my birthday this year and the other one only texted me 'birth' on my birthday, the last one he's a keeper - we're basically brothers and he always checks in on me, but he doesnt live in the same state as me. so all of that is to say. When this person broke mutuals it kind of made me, or rather for my own sanity, seriously re-evaluate my relationship with how i spend my free time, and who and what exactly am i placing value in. this person absolutely does not care about me and i dont expect them to. and given what little we had in terms of an online friendship i guess i let my hope of a cool friendship with them blind me to the reality of what we actually had. time and time again i have placed more hope and love into online individuals that do not reciprocate - and usually they just drop the ball on me. which is like ok. im sure i was either too little or too much i can never accurately gauge how intense i am due to, you know, Lack of Real Life Experience. oh right the suicide thing, so like for the longest time i struggled with suicidal idealization - it only stopped until i graduated about two years ago. In my pre-teens to late teens i told myself that if i was in the same scenario where my mom and my sister are my only family but we were well off i would definitely have killed myself.

I decided as a pre-teen that my only worth was how high i could get into my academics in order to lift my mom out of poverty. that was the Singular Only driving factor that kept me alive. kinda. damn that sucks to write out lol but its true! that was my mantra back then and i would repeat it anytime something shitty happened to me or someone was mean to me. im not sure where im going with this. i just wanted to get it out there, that i was and still am very lonely in person, and whats funny is that im not even like ugly im just average, i hung out with my sister and dolled myself up a bit for my birthday and we went to the mall and three guys hit on me unprompted so its definitely not a looks thing - SPEAKING OF when i got into uni and moved into an apartment with four roomates i was like this is my YEAR, im gonna go out SO MUCH im gonna walk around campus im gonna go out late and do school clubs!! and then covid happened. the apartment lease was worthless. i stayed indoors exactly the same amount as i always did only this time it was justified, but it sucked because that was the time i had decided i was going to break my cycle of staying inside holy shit that fucking sucked. and then my senior year of college i didnt need to stay in an apartment anymore because i was required to be in a hospital four days out of the week for training so i ended up back at my moms. i think there is something wrong w me tho bc im not saying it was being poor that led to me being awkward. but it didnt help, and im gonna go ahead and blame my lack of a support group - family wise, my entire life, on how uh. i came out. lately im trying to reel back how blunt i am. which. uh. hmm. i actually have a large language barrier with my mom. somehow i picked up on understanding spanish but not speaking it perfectly, it improved, im way better at speaking it now.

but i could hardly communicate with my mom while growing up, and she never expressed interests in my hobbies or who i was as a person, to this day i am and will forever be a 7 year old toddler in her eyes. she still shows no interest in me as a person or who i am. which is fine with me, ive accepted that she wont change, because she grew up in a more messed up environment and this entire time only until Recently, she had been on breadwinner providing for my two daughters survival mode. um. so , like i mentioned. that person breaking mutuals just shone a light on how, broken i am as a person? you would think, without physical barriers the sky is the limit when it comes to befriending people but no i still struggle i cant do anything right i suppose. i just need to focus on improving my life outside of online spaces. people online will reach out of they want to and can so im trying to lessen my hopes in general. and um. idk im at a loss for words currently. i simply dont know where to begin when it comes to , anything? living? hmm. i only just escaped school so i feel like i can breath - air for once. im no longer under the scary pressure of - if i fail at school im better off dead- ohh i think i know what i can add - offline people are WEIRD. ive had a couple of hiccups with friends irl that i literally dont talk to anymore! one of them became a misogynist red pill guy, another guy kept trying to touch me every time we hung out! and the last guy kept telling me to fuck off when i asked how he was doing!! hmmm. yeah this is just circling back to my current mantra which is to not be overly mean to myself for how i am currently due to my , situations leading up to now. I DONT KNOW. here's hoping..!! something !! anything is nice to me!! ohhhh i remembered something else. recently my coworker exchanged numbers w me saying something about haning out with other coworkers in the future. i am so desperately trying not to get my hopes too high up. always happens tho!!!!!!!! i get my hopes up when it comes to making friends both offline and online!!!!!! and guess what keeps happening again and again!!! HAHA………..can i have hope this time??? do u know once i tried reaching out to a mutual i wanted to befriend and get closer to (we were calling each other friends by this point) on Three Separate Platforms i knew they were active on only for them to Not respond to Anything i sent? AND i didnt even reach out three times in a row I Spaced It Out like a Normal Person. Only for Them to Tell me how they were having Fun in Their Friend Group of Other Online People talking about our Mutual Interests. Do you know how fucking stupid i felt at that moment. Oh im sorry am i not cool enough to be invited to that. Am i too stupid what is it about me thats so repellent??

I know its common courtesy to not be straight to people and tell them whats wrong with them but damn i wish someone would be straight with me and Not leave me hanging UGH. I realized at that moment tho that I never wanted to BE that desperate EVER AGAIN. I felt like such a stupid asshole holy shit. I never want to be that desperate for some onlines person attention ever again oh my god,, i dont think ill ever forgive them for that. its all on me though!!!!!!!!! mY FAULT!!!!!!!, for placing Value and i guess getting my Hopes up that i could make friends again WHOOPSIES i forgot im fuckin uhhh Ultra stinko Stupid Bitch who cant maintain any sort of relationship!!! back to the ditch on the side of the road i go to drink my stupid pond water like the unlovable unwarranted piece of shit nobody wants to hang out with again!!!!!!!! MY BAD!!!!!!! SO SORRY TO BOTHER. well its whatever i got money now, i have a job. and as much as i would like to say well earning money is all that matters right? its not. im a greedy greedy jealous little sniveling BITCH and my heart will never stop yearning for what others take for Granted. SO YEAH LOL. this has felt great to type out!! if you relate to any of that...um... Im sorry!!!!! we all in this together. but maybe not really im just gonna be kept at arms length with literally anyone i try to befriend offline due to me bein a little weirdo who cant relate to anything haaa,,, i want to end this on a positive note but fuck that! This is where im currently at and this is my current predicament! Will it improve? sure if i put some effort into myself and spend less time online and stop putting rakes on the ground to step on. i literally set myself up for getting hurt everytime ill figure out a way to make the pain hurt less.

[linalavender]

[🇸🇪/🇵🇸Political ranting] Im fucking tired.

This is a Political post, Normally I would be very apologetic for expressing my opinions on something but Im not gonna do that. Not anymore. Ill tag it as Political just as I do with spoilers but if this is the stuff you actively want to avoid just ignore it/unfollow me.

I... I think whats happening in Gaza and the absolute indifference or even defense my goverment has to the matter is what makes me actually go into political activism because this shit is fucking insane. Its plain for the world to see whats happening but Swedish Goverments official stance just still seems to be "Israel has the right to defend itself". WHAT FUCKING BULLSHIT IS THAT? THERES A FUCKING GENOCIDE AND AN ETHNIC CLEANISNG HAPPENING RIGHT UNDER YOUR FUCKING NOSE AND YOU ARE CALLING TO STOP OUR FINANCIAL AID FOR PALESTINE?! SUPPORT ISRAEL IN THEIR EFFORTS? The party ive always supported is ofcourse staunchly against this shit, They are always on the side of the Opressed. (They are quite literally the former communist party, duuh)

Public service reporting is doing the Propaganda tier stance of Palestinians "dying" of seemingly unkown causes becuase thye never elaborate further than that ofcourse, while Israelis are brutally murdered in cold blood.

Same with other publications, The only ones ive seen actually call it out for what it actually is fucking far left publications. Its so fucking tiring. The thing that made me so fucking mad recently was finding out a CHARITY FUNDRAISER EVENT in which 4 hosts lock themselves in a glass box for 2 weeks and do a radio/TV show 24/7 has fired one of its hosts for standing up for Palestine. Whats the Fundraiser for? Starving children. The person responsible for this event? Has been very outspoken and supportive of Ukraine, But Palestine is too much apparently. Or Perhaps to brown? Who Knows really. All we can safely say I guess is that children starving in a systematic and slow killing of a ethnic minority doesnt count.

Ive always had strong opinions on things but I never shared them for years, Especially in real life. Thats fucking over. Im done just being fucking silent on things. Fuck your Zionist bullshit you far right piece of shit goverment.

Leve Palestina, Krossa Zionismen. ("Long live Palestine, Crush Zionism" A lyric from the Swedish song Leve Palestina - Kofia that translates to "Long Live Palestine" From the 70's, The Left wing of Sweden has long stood with Palestine but this has changed in the recent decade which is fucking gross. I cant stand for that bullshit.) From River to the Sea.

Sorry for having such a long post its just suffocating not sharing these thoughts over the past few weeks or so.

[malevolententity]

hrmgmgm 4ever situ thoughts

this will probably get messy and personal because that Really informs how i feel and i need to expel it from my body LMAO

i still dont know how i feel. or well. i know how i feel but its nuanced and conflicted and im mad that i cant concisely say how i feel. we Know the initial information didnt come out in good faith. we Know that the girls involved were not asked how they felt prior to the callouts. we also can see from current actions that this doesnt happen anymore. that it doesnt represent who he is as a person in recent years.

and i fully believe that people are able to change and grow from past wrong actions. regardless of if those actions were just wrong jokes or Literal Actions.

this cycle never gets easier. ive been on both sides e.g. being like one of the girls. but also being one of the ccs. so i get their no nuance just anger. because m still mad as hell about ike/ciel. as someone who was good friends with him. but also was the same age as his victims and very easily could be considered one by some people. shout out to being two people removed from ironmouse though 🤪.

but ive also like. been in the girls situation. you dig back 11/12 years on here. theres Going to be evidence of 22 year olds with thousands of followers flirting with 13/14 year old me. some of whom were harmless friends making weird tasteless no intent jokes. and some of whom were genuine pedophiles that either were complete strangers or people i knew in real life and called friends. and id be fucking pissed if any of those were taken out of or even in context without my permission. because its my story. if anyones going to be talking about it it should only ever be because i decided i wanted it to be talked about. not some random person having a vendetta against people i used to talk to and finding and using bits of my story as a way to defame someone whos recent actions do not line up with the deplorable actions of them in 20 fucking 12.

and so i cant help but have 800 fucking emotions. because what we know about is gross. but i dont believe he should be fully deplatformed over shit he hasnt done in 5-7 years. and that is absolutely fueled by my emotions because as far as we know. the girls did not ask for him to be deplatformed. the girls stories are being spread without their input to ruin a guys life. and i would feel violated if i was used as evidence by strangers against my will.

but maybe thats just the victim brain in me who will always feel the need to shield some of the guys from my past because its complicated and messy and humans are complicated and messy. and im just projecting. because i have been in those girls position. a few times.

and thats why ive been mostly silent through this whole thing. because i am a Hashtag Bad Victim and no one wants to hear from the people who think were being too hasty and think information should come from the people involved. not twitter sleuths who really fucking hate a cc.

that said for people who need to see it written out. im not supporting him with views on future videos. i still enjoy 4ever as a character. i will still probably reblog 4ever art every now and then, because ive also gone thru this in a dnd fandom where one guy turned out to be a shitter but i still enjoyed his character so i will engage with the character when i feel like it. because that character is not the streamer.

this whole situation just feels bad and unfair to absolutely everyone involved. no one here is winning. celebrating his removal is weird. because the removal means something Did happen and thats horrible. and watching this turn into a spectacle to see who unfollows next/what the next announcement is, is disgusting. this isnt a game and it feels like some of you are treating it that way. these are real lives, these are real people.

side tangent.

i really fucking cant stand everyone whos been comparing this to the dream situations. because every single dream situation has come from victims or people posing as victims. so of course. listen to them and do your own research but believe them from the get go. THIS THOUGH????? WAS ADMITTEDLY UNRELATED PEOPLE WHO HATED A GUY, WHO FOR MONTHS HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO DEPLATFORM HIM. AND FINALLY FOUND SOMETHING THAT WAS ACTIONABLE. of course some of us were going to hold off on forming thoughts and were gonna be skeptical of where the information came from because it was not victims coming forward.

its two different fucking situations and acting like theyre the same is insane to me.