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sankyeom · 4 years ago

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lullaby | j.b

pairings: jacob bae x reader genre: neighbour au, strangers to lovers, kind of implied that you both are in college summary: in which your new neighbour sings you to sleep every night since the walls in your building are so thin, and you fall in love with his voice word count: 5.4k series: sankyeom’s 2k followers celebration note: yes i’m in love with jacob’s a to boyz video. yes it inspired this fic. yes i’m going through it.

masterlist

When your old neighbour moved out, you couldn’t be happier at the news.

The girl living in the apartment next to yours used to blast her music late at night and into the early morning, and she always kept you up. Sometimes she did it just for fun, other times she did it to overpower the sound of her arguing with her boyfriend. Either way, you would be up at night wanting nothing more than to go over to your neighbour’s apartment and break her door down as a form of revenge.

But you didn’t, because you quite liked your apartment and didn’t want to give your landlord a reason to kick you out.

Instead, you and your other neighbours filed enough noise complaints to the building’s owner until the girl moved out on her own accord. If you had to pinpoint the worst three months of your life, it would be the time when that girl lived next door to you.

Of course it wasn’t entirely her fault; your apartment building had hilariously thin walls. Her music wasn’t the worst thing you had heard through the walls, but it was certainly the loudest and most consistent thing that bothered you.

For a few weeks, the apartment next to yours was vacant, and you were able to relish in the silence that you had been dreaming about for so many gruelling nights. One afternoon after you came home from your day of classes to find the elderly lady who lives a few doors down for you peeking outside her front door.

“Hi Mrs Kim,” you greeted her with a wave. Her eyes flitted over to you and she offered you a smile. Mrs Kim was your favourite neighbour by far. She always brought you treats when she made too many and made sure to check in on you regularly since you lived alone.

“Hi dear,” she waved back, eyes crinkling as she realised it was you.

“What are you up to?” you wondered.

“I’m just spying on your new neighbour,” Mrs Kim informed you, stepping out of her door frame to speak with you.

You sighed. “Another neighbour?” you echoed, craning your neck to see them move in.

If they were interesting enough to peak Mrs Kim’s interest, you wanted to see them for yourself. Alas, all you could see were boxes and bags piled outside the open front door of the apartment next to yours, the new tenant nowhere in sight.

“I was just getting used to having some peace and quiet around here,” you recalled as an afterthought, wincing at the memories of your last neighbour. Although you had no personal issues with her, you were glad to see the self-absorbed music-blaster go.

“I know dear,” Mrs Kim gave you a sympathetic smile, thinking back to how tired and cranky you were a while back. “But he looks kind,” she offered. “He greeted me very nicely and he even has a guitar! How wonderful.”

“A guitar?” you repeated, frowning. “Not electric, I hope?”

Mrs Kim laughed. “Don’t worry so much, Y/n,” she told you, patting your shoulder in an endearing manner. “He was quite handsome.”

You rose an eyebrow. You had been at the hand of Mrs Kim’s attempted set-ups many times before. “And that’s my cue,” you laughed, saying your goodbyes to Mrs Kim and making your way to your apartment. As you took your keys out and started unlocking your door, curiosity got the best of you and you tried to peer into your neighbour’s apartment for a sign of him. “What are you doing,” you muttered to yourself, scolding yourself for invading your new neighbour’s privacy and entering your apartment.

You awoke from your nap to the sound of music.

“Not again,” you groaned, thinking it was your new neighbour in your sleepy state. Soon, you realised that it was just your phone ringing, and felt a little guilty for immediately blaming your neighbour without even meeting him once. “Hello?” you picked up the call.

“Y/N!” your best friend Changmin yelled into your ear.

“Dude,” you groaned. “Why are you using your outdoor voice?”

“This is my indoor voice,” Changmin exclaimed, surprised that you had found him so loud. “You act like you don’t even know me.”

“Oh, my apologies,” you mumbled, putting your phone on speaker just to get it away from your ear. “What’s up? You woke me from my nap.”

“Mrs Kim told me that you have a new neighbour,” Changmin said casually.

You narrowed your eyes at your phone. “When did you talk to Mrs Kim?”

“I saw her at the convenience store,” Changmin happily informed you. “She said she’d give you some brownies for you to pass on to me in the next few days.”

You laughed at this. “How can you charm everyone around you, including the old ladies that live on my floor?”

“Never mind that,” Changmin dismissed. “New neighbour? What’s he like?”

“I don’t know,” you got out of bed to draw your curtains, letting what was left of the sunset brighten your room. You had fallen asleep while studying, and thus hadn’t set an alarm. “I haven’t met him yet.”

“Mrs Kim says he’s cute.”

“Mrs Kim says everyone is cute,” you scoffed. “That woman is a saint.”

“Alright, that’s fair,” Changmin giggled. “Why are you napping this late? You won’t be able to fall asleep tonight if you nap for so long.”

“I know,” you hummed, stretching out and relishing in how relaxed you felt after your nap.

Your best friend was right, though. Whenever you napped in the late afternoon, you always struggled to fall asleep again that night. Of course, this wasn’t a problem when your monstrous neighbour blasted her music every night anyway, but once she left naps and a good night’s sleep were finally possible for you.

“Maybe my new neighbour will play me a lullaby on his electric guitar,” you joke.

“He has an electric guitar?”

“I don’t know,” you admitted. “Mrs Kim says he carried a guitar into his apartment. I haven’t heard him play yet so I don’t know what kind. But I’m delighted to hear it.”

Changmin snorted. “Really?” he asked in disbelief, having been on the end of some rants about you possibly kidnapping your previous neighbour and threatening her to move out.

“Sure,” you exclaimed. “As long as he plays it during hours of the day where I want to be awake, I have no problems what-so-ever with a little rock and roll.”

“Hilarious,” Changmin said sarcastically. “Anyway, did you finish your Chemistry study guide?”

“Is that why you’re calling?” you wondered. “Pretending to be curious about my new neighbour just to steal my hard work and Chemistry notes.”

“You caught me,” Changmin said happily, no shame in his voice. “So?”

You flipped through your notes to see where you go up to before falling asleep. “Yeah I finished them. I suppose you want my Econ notes when I’m done with them too?”

“Forget Mrs Kim, you’re the real saint,” Changmin said in lieu of an answer.

“No need to butter me up, I’ve already agreed,” you rolled your eyes, grinning at your best friend’s antics. “I’ll text you pictures later.”

Once you said your goodbyes, you made your way into the kitchen to turn on the kettle for a hot drink before wandering back into your room to search for a sweater. Once your water was boiled, you made yourself a drink and snuck back into your bed to burrow under the covers and finish studying.

As you took a sip of your drink and flipped through your Economics notes, you heard the faint timbre of an acoustic guitar. Pausing, you stopped your actions and sat up straight, as if this would amplify the sound more so you could hear it.

You guessed your new neighbour didn’t have an electric guitar after all.

The warm chords that you could make out were soothing and whimsical, and you allowed yourself to get lost in your neighbour’s playing for a moment. Deciding that it would make good background study music, you set aside your headphones in favour of listening to your neighbour play his guitar.

Soon, you were already finished with your Economics study guide so you snapped a few pictures of them and sent them to Changmin, along with your study guide for Chemistry too. A quick glance at the clock told you that you had been studying for an hour and a half after napping, meaning that your neighbour was persistently playing for just as long.

Just as you started considering what movie to watch to kill time so you could feel tired enough to go to sleep, soft singing started to accompany the guitar playing coming from your neighbours’s apartment. His voice was rich and tender at the same time; filled with emotion and lyrics close to a mumble in terms of enunciating. Something about his voice made your heart flutter, just slightly. If you thought he was a good guitar player, you thought he was a phenomenal vocalist.

Rather than watching a movie, you tucked yourself into bed and went on your phone to scroll through social media for a while, just listening to the sound of your neighbour’s voice and the music he was playing.

It didn’t take long before your eyes started to feel heavy; lulled to sleep by the timbre of your neighbour’s voice and the warmth of the covers on your bed. Thanking your past self for already setting your alarm for your classes the next day, you were soothed into a deep sleep despite the fact that you took a lengthy nap that afternoon.

The next morning, you felt as though you had never slept so well in your entire life.

Your bed was almost impossibly cosy and you had to seriously motivate yourself to get out of bed and head to your lectures for the day. After getting ready and dressed for the day, you wrapped a scarf around your neck to fend against the biting cold autumn air. As you exited your apartment, you couldn’t help but linger your gaze on your neighbour’s door, wondering if he was still inside or if he had already left.

“He’s gone,” you yelped as Mrs Kim’s voice startled you out of your stare. She stood as if she hadn’t scared you, unfazed by your reaction. “He left two hours ago.”

You put a hand on your chest in an attempt to calm its erratic beat. “Mrs Kim,” you greeted. “You scared me.”

Mrs Kim ignored you, smirking knowingly at you. “So you saw him then?” she assumed. “You must have, if you’re looking at his door like you want him to come out of his apartment.”

“I didn’t see him yet, Mrs Kim,” you denied with a small smile. “I was in my apartment all night and I’m only just leaving now,” you added.

“Then why’re you staring?” she asked, bending down to pick up her cat from the floor.

“Just curious,” you said, which wasn’t entirely a lie. You wanted to know exactly who had sung you a lullaby that was so sweet it put you right to sleep. “Is he really that handsome, Mrs Kim? Not only did you tell me but you told Changmin about it too.”

“He’s very handsome,” Mrs Kim insisted, pushing a container into your arms with her free hand. “Speaking of your charming friend, that’s for him.”

The container had cut up brownies in it, and you almost laughed at how well Changmin and Mrs Kim got along. “Thank you Mrs Kim, I’ll be sure to give them to him today,” you promised, making your way down the hall and rushing to the bus stop so that you wouldn’t miss the last bus that would get you to college on time.

Somehow, it felt as though your new neighbour was avoiding you.

Either that, or the two of you just kept missing one another. Any time you had to leave, you could still hear him milling around his apartment. The only times you ever heard his front door open was when you were just getting home, or had no intention of leaving. Even Changmin, who was a social butterfly and constantly fluttered in between your friends’ places, never saw your neighbour when he came by to visit.

Without a fail, your neighbour played the guitar and sang every single night.

Sometimes he would play during the day as well, but he only ever sang at night. You assumed that he figured he could sing at night so that nobody else heard him, unaware of the paper-thin walls that separated your apartments. You wondered if it was because he was being courteous, or if he was just shy about singing when other people could hear. Either way, you definitely credited your neighbour to being the reason that you fell asleep peacefully every night.

You never had trouble falling asleep in general, but you mostly had very restless nights of sleep, even in the complete silence you heard when your neighbouring apartment was vacant.

Something about your neighbour’s voice just relaxed you to the point where you slept like a little baby.

The first time you met the owner of said voice, you were running late for class and cursing Changmin on the phone as he laughed at your misfortune. He had been teasing you all week about a presentation you were nervous about, saying that you were so well-prepared that the only thing that could mess it up was you missing the class entirely.

Then your alarm didn’t go off and you woke up half an hour later than you usually would on that day.

“Ji Changmin, you’re an ass,” you fumed, pulling your coat on as you opened the front door of your apartment. “You must have cursed me or something, or at least you spoke it into existence. I don’t know but if you don-“

“I’m so sorry!” a familiar voice exclaimed upon your impact with another body. Two hands reached out to steady you and prevent you from falling over, and your eyes met those of a brown-eyed man.

A beautiful, beautiful, brown-eyed man.

“Are you okay?” he asked, since all you had done since the two of you collided was stare at him. “You’re not… concussed, are you? Can you get concussed by bumping into someone?”

“I don’t think so,” you breathed out, taking in his sharp features and large, kind eyes. “I’m sorry. That was definitely my fault, I was rushing, and yelling at my friend,” you tried to explain, but were interrupted when he laughed.

“No harm done,” he assured you, a shy smile appearing on his face. “I’m Jacob. I just moved in next door, actually,” he introduced himself.

Jacob. Mrs Kim was right, he was very handsome.

“Hi Jacob,” you replied, holding out your hand for him to shake. “I’m-“

“Y/n, right?” he stated. At your surprised expression, Jacob only shrugged. “I talked to Mrs Kim from a few doors down. She told me all about you.”

“Oh gosh,” you laugh, covering your face with a hand. “I hope not everything. She’s seen me at my worst, let me put it that way.”

“All good things,” Jacob assured you in his velvety voice. “She speaks really highly of you. Says that you’re smart, kind, and that you have great taste in friends.”

You grin. “Ah, yes. My best friend seems to have charmed his way into her heart. That’s why he gets brownies in a Tupperware and I don’t,” you informed him. “I’m sure you’ll get there too.”

“I sure hope so,” Jacob nods. “I’m a terrible baker and brownies sound really good.” The two of you shared a laugh. “You said you were in a rush, right?” he seemed to recall, causing your eyes to widen.

“Yes! I need to run. I need to catch a bus, like,” you glanced at the time on your phone, realising how late you were and that you were still on a call with Changmin. “Twenty minutes ago.”

“Good luck,” Jacob smiled, waving at you as you said your goodbyes.

“Nice meeting you!” you called back to him, starting to jog down the staircase before bringing your phone up to your ear.

“Jacob, hm?” Changmin’s voice teased you.

“Watch it, Ji Changmin,” you warned. “You’re on thin ice already. Save me a seat!”

Other than being sung to sleep by him every night, your relationship with Jacob pretty much ended at your first meeting. The two of you always exchanged pleasantries when you passed each other in the hallway, and he had once informed you that he really had reached brownie-level friendships with Mrs Kim, but nothing beyond that.

You couldn’t say that you were surprised, considering how the two of you had such different schedules and you kept missing one another, but you somehow felt a little disappointed.

It felt a little bit like the two of you already knew each other, as you heard him sing every single night; hearing the emotion and vulnerability in his voice with every song. But you knew nothing about each other.

After a particularly gruelling day of your Chemistry lab class, you dragged your feet up the stairs to your apartment, feeling utterly exhausted and worn out by your class.

Your lab partner was the absolute worst. He was one of those types that thought he knew everything better than you because he was a Chemistry major, and he belittled you about every single step in the lab. Most of what he was saying was wrong, but he wouldn’t listen to you because he was sure he was right.

Half a semester later, you had just gotten your midterm back and found out that you failed because the data from your experiments were incorrect, and your professor couldn’t give you full credit for any of your answers. Frustrated tears built in your eyes as you made you way to your apartment door, rummaging through your bag for your keys.

“This can’t be happening,” you whined when you realised that your keys were nowhere in your bag, and you had left them in your apartment that morning. “Seriously? Today of all days?” you exclaimed, wiping your cheeks to dry your tears as you headed for Mrs Kim’s apartment to see if she was home. You had entrusted her with a spare key to your apartment since you knew you couldn’t take care of it yourself, and becomes she was so close by.

Realising she wasn’t home, you trudged back to your apartment and sunk onto the floor, burying your face in your knees and letting out a sob. Your day had been mentally and physically exhausting enough without having to wait outside your apartment, in the cold autumn air, to anticipate Mrs Kim’s return so you could enter your apartment.

The door next to yours opened slightly, a soft, concerned voice calling out to you. “Y/n?” Jacob asked quietly, wondering why you were outside. When he noticed your crying, he immediately stepped outside and knelt in front of you. “Are you okay? What happened?” You could only sob in response, not having it in you to explain your situation to him. “Why are you crying?” sniffling, you managed to raise your head and point weakly at your front door.

“You’re locked out?” he guessed, earning a nod. “Okay, let’s go to my place,” Jacob offered you, holding his hand out to help you up. “I just made hot chocolate, and I have Disney Plus so we can watch something while you wait for Mrs Kim,” he paused when you didn’t say anything. “Technically, it’s not my Disney Plus account, but I have my friend’s password. He subscribed just to watch the Beyonce album film,” you laughed tearfully, which Jacob considered a success.

“I don’t want to bother you,” you admitted in a quiet voice, slightly raw from your crying.

“You? Bothering me?” Jacob exclaimed. “Never. Now c’mon. Our hot chocolate’s getting cold.”

Grateful for his kindness, you accepted his outstretched hand and let him pull you to your feet, gently ushering you into his apartment and closing the door behind you. He motioned for you to take a seat on his sofa and you did so, taking off your coat and scarf as you adjusted to Jacob’s warm apartment.

“Here,” he placed two mugs of hot chocolate on the coffee table in front of you, taking a seat on a sofa next to you but giving you some space. You mumbled a quiet thank you before sipping on the hot drink, savouring the way it warmed your insides.

Spotting his guitar leaning against the wall next to the TV, you cocked your head in curiosity to see what it looked like. It was made of a light brown, almost yellow, wood and looked like it was treasured by Jacob. Not only was it in perfect condition, it also looked like it had been used for years already. You silently wondered how long he had been playing it for. “Do you play?” Jacob asked, noticing where your eyes were looking.

Shaking your head, you told him that you didn’t. “You’re really good, though,” you complimented before you could realise what you were saying.

Jacob blinked at you, eyes wide and lips pursed in surprise. “Me?” he echoed. “You’ve heard me play?”

Feeling stupid, you only nodded, sipping more of your hot chocolate as an excuse to think about what you wanted to say. “Um, yeah. Walls are kind of thin around here.”

Jacob blushed. “I’m so sorry,” he apologised. “I play until really late at night most of the time. I even-“ he paused, realising you had heard him sing. “I even sing,” he whispered, eyes flitting to the ground as his cheeks reddened further.

“You’re really good,” you complimented. “At singing, too.”

Jacob shook his head. “It must be annoying.”

“Not at all,” you denied. “My last neighbour used to blast angry-girl rock music. Now, I have nothing against angry-girl rock music, but I do when it’s being played at an ear-splitting volume into the early hours of the morning. That’s annoying. Your singing… It’s more like a lullaby,” you finished your thoughts in a whisper, shy at your explanation.

“Really?” Jacob was shocked.

You hummed in agreement. “I’ve never slept so well in my life,” you admitted with a small smile.

“Oh,” Jacob sipped on his mug to stop a huge smile from taking over his features. After meeting Mrs Kim for the first time, he was intrigued to meet the person she was speaking so highly of. When he ran into you, he felt flustered and excited because you were even more stunning than he could have imagined from Mrs Kim’s description. “I’m glad I helped, then. Even though the idea of you hearing me is mildly humiliating.”

“What!” you exclaimed, louder than you had intended to. “Why would it be humiliating? Your singing is… I can’t even describe it with words. It’s beautiful, Jacob.”

“You think so?” he asked in a disbelieving tone. Your eager nod made butterflies flutter in his stomach. “Thank you. That actually means a lot.”

“You don’t seem to believe me,” you observed.

“I’m not that confident in myself, or my playing,” Jacob explained awkwardly. “I’m more the quiet type, so it’s not so easy for me to put myself out there when it comes to music. I want my music to mean something to other people, and it’s how I communicate best, so…”

“Well, I can confirm first-hand that you’re amazing,” you offered. “I might not be as great of a musician as you, so my compliment might not mean anything to you, but I really believe it.”

Jacob bit his bottom lip, deciding to nod in response to your words, too shy to say much else. You took his reaction as a sign that he didn’t want to continue the conversation anymore, so you focused your attention back onto your hot chocolate. “Do you want to watch a movie?” he offered.

“I would love to leach off of your friend’s Disney Plus account,” you agreed, referring to how Jacob ranted a little about his friend. Jacob grinned, getting up to hang your coat and scarf up for you before he turned the TV on.

Being with Jacob in a more casual state was more fun than you had expected.

Once the two of you warmed up to one another, you found that Jacob was actually really goofy and fun when he got comfortable with you. He made terrible puns about the characters in the film you decided on, and his laugh made you want to squeal because he was so adorable.

Halfway through your second movie, you had fallen asleep as a result of the hot chocolate that had deliciously warmed your body, and the exhaustion from your emotional day. When Jacob noticed, he took one of the throw blankets form his bedroom and gently placed it over your body, getting up from the sofa to let you stretch out and get some rest.

The few times you woke up after falling asleep, you were lulled back to sleep and relaxed by Jacob’s soothing guitar playing and singing. Despite being tired, you were awake long enough to be pleased that Jacob seemed comfortable enough around you to play for you while you were still in his apartment, instead of just waiting until you left.

The next morning, you woke up to the sound of Jacob’s sweet voice gently calling for you to wake up. After opening your eyes, you saw Jacob kneeling in front of you with a bright smile and ruffled hair. “Hi sleepyhead,” he greeted, handing you a cup of tea. You sat up, rubbing your eyes with one hand and accepting the mug with the other. “Mrs Kim came by to drop off your key,” Jacob said. “I texted her last night.”

“Thank you,” you replied, surprised that he had gone out of his way to contact Mrs Kim when you were an emotional wreck who had forgotten all about it.

“She also said to wake you before noon because you have classes in the afternoon and you hate rushing,” Jacob added in thought, passing your spare key from Mrs Kim over to you. “Seems a little ironic since you and I seem to only ever meet when you’re rushing.”

You laughed at this. “What can I say, you always catch me on a good day,” you joke. “But seriously. Thank you. You really helped me out last night, I don’t know how I can repay you.”

Jacob waved you off. “No repayment needed. I’m just happy to get closer to you after being your neighbour for over a month already.”

His large smile was one that you hoped you’d be seeing more of. “Has anybody ever told you that you’re an angel?” you wondered, resting your head on your hand as you observed Jacob’s face. The fluttery feeling in your stomach didn’t surprise you anymore, not after he had saved you the night before. “Like an actual angel. Now that I’ve gotten to know you better, I think I see your wings.”

A giggle escaped the man next to you. “I’ve actually heard that before,” Jacob admitted sheepishly.

“I’m not surprised,” you hummed, sipping on the warm tea Jacob made for you. “What time is it?”

“Just after eleven,” Jacob recited. “Do you have to get going?”

You nodded, finishing up your cup of tea. “I do, unfortunately. I have to go see my Chemistry professor and do some serious begging and grovelling.”

“Sounds rough,” Jacob gave you a sympathetic smile. “Well, I had a really good time last night.”

You smiled back easily, unable to hold it back. “I had a really good time last night too,” you assured him. “I really can’t thank you enough.”

“Stop,” Jacob laughed. “Don’t even think about it. I was happy to have you over.”

“I was happy to finally hear your playing in person,” you replied. “I only really heard it in and out of sleep, but I was still glad to hear it. Also,” you paused, unsure if you were going too far.

“Also,” he echoed, curiosity piqued.

“You said last night that you wanted your music to mean something,” you recalled. “It does mean something. To me, at least. It actually means a lot.”

“I think I can see those angel wings you’re talking about,” Jacob said. “Except they’re on you.”

“Very funny,” you laughed, getting up and finding your coat. “I really need to get going, though.”

“Okay,” Jacob nodded, walking you to the door. “I’ll see you around?” he offered, insecure that you wouldn’t want to spend more time with him.

“I’ll see you soon,” you corrected, flashing him a wink before you let yourself out. Jacob closed the door behind you and you let yourself sigh in delight, relishing in the evening you had together the night before.

“What are you doing walking out of your hot neighbour’s apartment?” you jumped, surprised by Changmin’s sudden presence at your front door. He held out a take-away cup of coffee for you.

“You scared me,” you told him, ignoring his comment as you accepted the coffee.

“Don’t act like you didn’t hear me,” Changmin scowled, following you into your apartment after you unlocked your door. “You came to school in those clothes yesterday. Did you hook up with your cute neighbour? Jacob?”

“You ask so many questions,” you complained, making your way into the bathroom to wash your face and brush your teeth. “No, I didn’t hook up with Jacob. I locked myself out and he graciously took me in for the evening, despite my emotional ugly-crying.”

Changmin laughed. “You would go stay at your hot neighbour’s house after having the crappiest day in the world,” he said, pleased at the outcome.

“Thanks, Changmin. Now I need to change so that I have enough time to beg our Chemistry professor to let me do extra-credit assignments so I don’t fail the class,” you added, feeling gloomy about what happened with your midterm the day before.

“Sure, sure,” Changmin nodded, taking a seat on your sofa and taking his phone out.

You made your way to your bedroom to change your clothes, going as quickly as possible so that you still had time to neaten your hair a little. When a knock sounded through your apartment, you called out to Changmin to open the door for you.

“Oh, hi!” you heard your best friend say in his usual chipper tone. “You must be Jacob! I’ve heard so much about you,” at the sound of Jacob’s name, you dropped your hair brush and rushed to the front door, where Changmin was smirking at your neighbour.

“Hey,” you greeted. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jacob assured you, glancing nervously at Changmin, who was still grinning at him.

“Could you give us a minute?” you asked Changmin, raising an eyebrow at his blatant eavesdropping. He sighed, sad that his fun was over, before he walked in the direction of your kitchen. “What’s up?” you smiled at Jacob.

He took a deep breath. “Would you want to get dinner some time?” he asked, tapping his foot as a nervous habit.

His question both surprised and delighted you. “Like a date?” you asked, hiding your smile.

“Like a date,” Jacob confirmed. “If you want.”

“I want,” you agreed, showing your smile. “I want a lot.”

“Great,” Jacob sighed, relieved. “I want a lot, too.” You giggled at how strange the two of you sounded.

“If you guys are going to start kissing, I suggest you do it now because we have to go,” Changmin called from the kitchen, ruining the moment.

Jacob pointed in Changmin’s direction. “He’s not coming to dinner, is he?” he asked.

You grinned. “Absolutely not.”

“How does tonight sound?” Jacob suggested. “Or is that too eager of me?”

“Just eager enough,” you assured him. “Pick me up at seven?”

“Sure thing,” he agreed, beaming as he stepped out of your doorway to go back to his apartment.

“I hope you don’t get lost on your way to my apartment,” you teased. “It’s awfully far from yours.”

“I’ll just follow the sound of your wings,” he called, waving before he disappeared into his apartment.

Dinner. You liked the sound of that.

note: second fic in my 2k celebration series!! i know that this fic and the last didn’t end with a kiss or a relationship but i still think the ending is cute, i hope it satisfies you!

#the boyz #the boyz imagines #jacob #jacob imagines #jacob x reader #the boyz x reader #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fanfic #tbznetwork #jacob bae #the boyz drabbles #the boyz fic #the boyz au #2k celebration #fic: lullaby #deobiwritersnet

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honeytea8 · 4 years ago

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✨✨La Squadra Boyfriend Headcanons✨✨

[Alexa, play Boyfriend by Big Time Rush]

Guys, I spend an ungodly amount of time thinking about La Squadra, so here are some bf headcanons for the sexiest group of assassins in Naples. No one asked but I am bringing it straight to your dash anyway! (under the cut for length lmao)

I’m going to start with Prosciutto, who has recently fallen on my radar pretty heavy!

He’s a good and decent boyfriend, if not a busy one. Not that he doesn’t care about the relationship, but most of his energy was going to Passione things before you waltzed in and so he’ll struggle a bit between his work responsibilities and maintaining his relationship with you, but only in the beginning.

If you are also a part of Passione, it’s a hell of a lot easier to manage.

I see Prosciutto as the gift-giving type: lingerie, sweets, perfume, designers, etc. His salary isn’t the best, but he manages it as well as he can just to accommodate you!

I just can’t get the idea out of my head that Pro was raised by a strict mama, that’s why he can be a bit of a stickler sometimes. He’ll catch you still lounging in bed at nine am, and be like “Why are you still in bed? Get dressed, we’re going out.” Dude!

I’m sorry to say, but Prosciutto is absolutely the ‘lecturing’ type. (He lectured someone in nearly every scene in the anime, Formaggio once and Pesci numerously and Bucci too)

He will lecture you when you make mistakes, especially because as his s/o, he has high expectations for you and believes you’re capable of so much more. It’s never, ever out of hate. He loves you, and that’s why he chides you a bit lol.

This does not negate the fact that he doesn't mind when you lean on him for support. He likes when you count on him, because he always comes through especially for you!

Depending on whether you’re in the mafia or not, I totally see him sparring with you, or working out with you in an effort to make you tough. Prosciutto wants you to be able to defend yourself, just in case. If you complain, he’ll tell you, “Better safe than sorry, tesoro”.

Prosciutto will respect you, period.

A good listener, goddamn! He’s up there with Risotto when it comes to who listens to their s/o more! If you have an issue, he’ll hear you out and offer advice if you want it. If you give him advice, he’ll take it into serious consideration. He’s honestly a good partner, can’t stress that enough.

Finally, sex with Pro is an entire event. Romantic dinner, candles lit, wine, the whole nine yards before he gives you nine inches of something else :) (I’m kidding!! Lmao, kinda).

But as I said, Prosciutto is quite deliberate, and a bit of a perfectionist. He knows what to do and how to do it, you can trust him.

Ghiaccio is next only because he’s my favorite.

The ice gremlin is probably the most interesting (and hilarious) boyfriend out of the bunch (I say this with only a tidbit of bias). He isn’t funny himself, but funny shit just happens to him.

Because of this, he will use you as a soundboard when everyone else refuses to listen to him. He’s got a lot to say, so be prepared for his TEDtalks. LMAO!

It will take some perception on your part to notice when he actually expects a response from you, and other times he’s just ranting to get his point out.

He will correct your grammar when you text, but barely notices when he makes a similar mistake (his brain moves in mph). Please use the proper names like Venezia, Italia, Roma and Napoli when talking to this man; save yourself from the headache.

When it comes to dates, please have mercy on him, he’s a textbook over-thinker! You’ll just have to plan something simple at home for you both to enjoy.

He isn’t incapable of planning dates, but he’ll want everything to be so absolutely perfect for his s/o and will throw a fit when it ultimately isn’t.

Contrary to popular belief, I think that Ghiaccio is a pretty attentive partner. He’s super intelligent and I think a part of it stems from his innate ability to read people (I’m referencing the part in the anime where he deduced what Giorno and Mista had come to look for, while going off very little information).

The more time he spends with you, the better he gets at it.

His form of affection will be shown through the amount of time you both spend together. When it comes to sex or anything related to that, be gentle and slow as Ghiaccio will likely be a flustered mess.

As he becomes more comfortable and confident, he will be bolder and just ask out right if you’ll suck him off tonight or not. The man appreciates directness, so don’t bother being coy. “You want me to give you head? Cool, lay down a towel or something.” is what he’ll probably say.

Very practical 👌🏾👌🏾

Melone, good lord, he’s kind of perfect.

A bit of a doting boyfriend here and there—very much concerned about your health. Expect him to ask if you’ve eaten, or taken your multivitamin. How are your bowel movements? LMAO

It can become a bit much, but he really genuinely cares. He’s not asking to be intrusive or nasty! If he was, you’d know. 🤣

But I seriously consider Melone to be the one (at least among La Squadra) who is way, way invested in his relationships. He will know every little detail about you; will ask you lots of questions and expects you to ask him just as many.

This may be annoying to some, but this dude will definitely bring up your horoscope in an argument. He’ll be like “I honestly can’t fathom why you’re being this way, though it’s to be expected from a libra.”

Peg this bitch so he can shut up.

Melone is also touchy as hell, but not in a clingy way. He loves touching, and just to tag onto the headcanon about his partial blindness, I want to say that he’s so touchy because that’s how he ‘sees’ you best.

Just know that half the time, he isn’t touching you to be lecherous, even if he genuinely does like the feel of your skin under his fingertips. Melone will even encourage you to touch him back.

Rub his thigh or back and he’ll be simping.

He is obsessed with your legs, and will paint your toes if you let him.

LOVES PDA! Melone will also tongue-kiss you in public if you let him!

Notice how I keep saying ‘if you let him’. Give him an inch and he’ll press you for a mile, so if there are boundaries you would like to establish, please do, cuz he sure as hell won’t, just saying!

When it comes to sex, Melone is a dick and coochie sensei. Oral is his favorite thing to do, probably enjoys giving more than receiving to be honest. I’d say he’s pretty much mastered sex for what it is.

That being said, if he’s ever talking out of his neck, just invite him to put his mouth to better use. He’ll even thank you for your gracious request.

Formaggio is next 💀

According to my JoJo compatriots from discord, he’s like the Optimus Prime of fuckboi’s so let’s ride that wave for a bit! LMAO

I hope it doesn’t come as a surprise that Formaggio is pretty shameless. He will send you a dick pic on Sunday morning before church and have the audacity to say “Just wanted to bless you real quick”.

@autumn-kouhai mentioned him giving his s/o sickly sweet pet names and I just have to agree.

Expect to be hit upside the head with: baby-boo, sugar plum, honey bunches, sweetums. I can imagine them becoming really ridiculous too like “the last piece of red velvet cake” or “cheddar bae biscuits from Red Lobster”

His catch phrase is “Got nudes?”

Send them, and he won’t be afraid to reply with something equally sexy.

Be warned though, he will stockpile whatever you send him and then be careless with his phone. If you don’t mind Illuso’s snoopy ass seeing your nudes then by all means, have at it. Otherwise, send them through snapchat, so they disappear later.

As far as La Squadra boyfriends go, he’s the most fun! Y’all don’t even go anywhere because man’s is broke. BUT, Formaggio knows how to have a good time without any need to spend money (my kind of dude tbh) you guys just crank up the tunes, dance, and get lit until the neighbors complain.

Formi is also the CEO of jokes/memes, and will have you in absolute tears almost always! I literally tell my friends that funny guys are so dangerous, don’t sleep on them! They will make you laugh until your panties drop, it’s magic, I swear. Formaggio has that same energy.

No matter how bad of a day his s/o is having, rest assured, he will draw the biggest laugh out of you.

Besides his fuckboi tendencies, his most redeeming quality is the fact that he’s super cool and fun to hang with. You’ll literally have a good time, always, because his energy is right! Very good vibes around this man, I swear! It’ll be exactly like dating your best friend, because essentially, he will be your bestie.

Formi has many moments of tenderness that aren’t sexually charged too—moments where the jokes stop and he’ll just rub your back or feet, this is usually when you aren’t feeling well and need some quiet.

However, Formaggio won’t let you mope all day, he’ll pull out the big guns and call you his “sweetie baby” and when you try to resist he’ll say “What, I’m just tryna show you some love.”

He’s a good dude lmao I’d date a guy like him irl 😭

Pesci stans wya??! Let’s get into this baby boy.

Pesci is boyfriend material, idgaf what anyone says.

He is pretty much the least problematic to be with among all of La Squadra, even more so than Risotto (don’t argue with me).

Pesci is hyper aware of your likes and dislikes and will literally go out of his way to make sure that you’re well and okay.

Arguments are basically nonexistent and if they occur it ain’t coming from his side.

I also think that Pesci has a lot of empathy, so when you’re going through something, he’s right there in the thick of it with you. If you’ve seen that meme that goes ‘when my gf is on her period it’s UterUS’ lmao that’s Pesci’s energy 100%.

Sometimes, he’s more of a lover and not a fight, that is perfectly okay!

However, if someone tries up his s/o, say farewell to Mr. Niceguy. He will defend your honor to his dying breath. And with you in his corner, trust me, he’s not going down.

A romantic at heart, Pesci will plan little date trips like picnics in the park or boat trips to Capri, actually, I’d like to point out that he excels in the art of date planning. If you’re the adventurous type, he’ll plan outings where you both will be more active, like biking through the city or renting a mop-ed and going sight-seeing.

Because Pesci has a sensitive stomach, he’s very much considerate of what you both put in your bodies. If you have dietary restrictions or allergies, this guy knows all about it and will cater to you perfectly.

A true gentleman through and through, he will never force himself on you, ever. In fact, he really doesn’t like engaging in anything sexual when you’re drunk or high, sorry if you’re into that!

Pesci is the kind of guy who keeps up with your favorite shows.

If ya’ll have similar taste in media or literature, he will immerse himself in it so that he can relate to you all the more.

If there’s anyone who will entertain anime-related discourse, no matter how nonsensical, it’s Pesci. And he isn’t just putting up with it, he’s actively engaging in the conversation so you are always heard and validated.

He’s an A+ boyfriend, that’s all I gotta say! Haters can stay mad :)

Goddamn Illuso... idk man.

I really feel like you have to have thick/tough skin to handle this guy, for various reasons.

The first being that Illuso can be a bit mean at first. He’ll push your buttons on purpose just to see what’ll make you tick. Will tease the living heck out of you, always, kind of a bully lmao but not to the extreme, it’s just his brand of humor—and the thing is, he won’t be mad when you dish it right back, so it’s cool.

Secondly, Illuso has big dick energy!!

I mean rightfully so, because he is indeed packing! But my word, he ain’t humble about it at all!

He is not above making jokes about ‘splitting you in half’. In fact all of his jokes have hidden, dirty undertones!

His affection is shown through speech mostly. Illuso will drop subtle innuendos and provocations, half to see you flustered and half because he wants you to know how much he wants you.

Illuso isn’t incredibly vocal about his feelings outside of ‘I’m tryna hit that thang’ but you won’t doubt that he loves you because Illuso doesn’t waste his own time.

If he’s spending his time with you, you can rest assured that it’s because he wants to.

Illuso is a voyeur and you’ll just have to understand/accept that and move on.

He loves watching you and will even creep over to your place through the mirror world just to hang or watch you do chores. Loves to surprise you and give you jump scares lmao it’ll make you a tad paranoid but it’s also fun.

Illuso is prone to random bouts of sweetness; it’s very sporadic, very touch-and-go.

One day, you’ll wake up to chocolates on your dresser or new shoes, lingerie, or makeup if you wear it. I imagine that if you’re low on funds, he will even help you buy your groceries that week.

It’ll surprise the hell out of you, but that’s just how Illuso is. He enjoys keeping you on your toes!

He’s prideful and smug as hell, so he will definitely expect a thank you, because even if he does it out of the kindness in his heart, he also wants to hear that you appreciate him

Same goes for the bedroom scene. Illuso loves making you vocal, it’s his favorite thing in the world, so he’ll make a game out of doing the things that get the biggest reaction out of you. Like I said, it's that big dick energy at work here, smh.

Sorbet and Gelato in a polyamorous relationship with you? Let’s get it!

We don’t get anything substantial about these two except that Sorbet follows the money, so these are all personal headcanons for how I see and write them.

Here’s the juice: when it comes to you as their s/o, these two are possessive as hell. You are theirs and that’s that on that! 😭 Don’t ask questions, just go with it.

Sorbet is the chill one of the duo. He can be a bit smug at times, but he’s mostly a laid back dude who doesn’t get bothered by much.

When it comes to you, Sorbet likes to spend quality time with you more than anything, and will ask you to cook for him at your place so he ain’t gotta spend money. Oh? Did I not mention that I kinda think of him as a cheapskate? Lmao cuz I do.

Sorbet will come by your place just to steal your coupons from the mail then head out; you’re not using ‘em so why should he let them go to waste?

Gelato is the complete opposite; personality wise, I headcanon him as a mix between Melone and Formaggio lmao

But it’s not as crazy as it sounds, he’s cute and outspoken like Melone, while maintaining a free-spirit like Formaggio. One quality that I like is that he’s quite devoted to you and Sorbet. If anyone crosses either of you, goodluck to them!

I like to think Gelato’s also just really boujee and high maintenance. He loves to pamper and be pampered. You and him tag-team Sorbet’s wallet and go on spa dates together at his expense (not that he ever really stood a chance)

While Sorbet is cool with just being in the same room as you, Gelato loves hugging/cuddling with you and Sorbet—will definitely fight for the middle spot between the two of you on the couch during movie nights.

He baby, so let him have it lol

In the bedroom, I would salute anyone with the guts to take the two of them on. They both lay down that work, period.

Sorbet gets his kicks from teasing and edging you (his sadistic side comes out a bit), while Gelato loves when you give him extra TLC. To put it short, they know how to take care of you, so there are no issues there.

Last but not least, Mr. Risotto Nero himself.

Man, idc on the lowest of keys, he seems a little bit like a grandpa to me

The type to sit at home and do crosswords, has a bird feeder in his yard and plays old Italian hits while washing the dishes. It’s very domestic 💀 (I find it cute, whatever!)

As a boyfriend, I can’t imagine him suddenly being spontaneous or outgoing unless you drag him out of his home/comfort zone.

Be patient with Mr. Nero, and he can come to surprise you

After a while, it won’t be just you dragging him out and about; one day he’ll ask you to come over and you’ll be greeted with a nice, traditional, homemade meal

Pay attention and you will notice him watching your face to see if you like his cooking 🥺

After seeing his fight with Doppio, I must admit that Risotto is very, very observant, almost scarily so.

I can totally picture him pointing out random things about his s/o that even they don’t know

One night, Risotto may come up to you and say “I talked to your neighbor about the dog, they’ll keep it inside now.” And you’re just staring like 😳 how did he know the barking was keeping you up at night????

He’s sweet, and will take good care of you as a boyfriend should.

Very good listener, won’t talk as much but will hang on to your every word, I promise. He could even recite it to you verbatim.

He’s a big dude, that ain’t news, so expect to be swallowed up in hugs and sometimes even picked up (as a tall girl myself, I simp!!!)

Gives A1 piggyback rides, lol

ALSO RISOTTO IS HUMBLE ASF!

Big dick energy, but on low volume 👏🏾 after all, he doesn’t need to do much talking, because a night with him is more than enough!

Listen babe, you better stretch, do some squats, and prep in whatever way you can before Mr. Nero gives you that work. 🤐

Lowkey a freak, but it’s well hidden behind his ‘quiet giant’ exterior

So, who are y'all dating? Personally, I’m going for Formaggio and Pesci hehe

#jojo #jojo’s bizarre adventure #vento aureo #la squadra #prosciutto #illuso #formaggio #melone #risotto nero #pesci #ghiaccio #gelato and sorbet #la squadra esecuzioni #la squadra di esecuzione #jojo headcanons #la squadra x reader #jojo part 5

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whatisthiswritingthing · 4 years ago

Text

Observation Skills - Part Six - Lindsey Horan x Reader

Lindsey is at camp, her relationship continues to develop and she returns with a new found confidence.

“Alright, who are talking to?” Rose interrogated the next morning. They had been down for breakfast for almost half an hour now and Lindsey had hardly looked away from her phone, a smile glued to her face.

She had woken up to string of texts from Sara.

Hot Trainer: Lindsey…

Terrible news

It’s a tragedy

Prepare yourself, sit down, whatever you need, but be ready

Are you ready?

I came to the gym this morning, worked out, showered, and then it happened

Are you sitting now?

I WAS OUT OF DINOSAUR OATMEAL!

Tragic isn’t it?!

It’s bad enough I don’t get to see you for three weeks, but now this?!

I’ll leave you process this tragedy, I’m here if you need to talk. We will get through this.

Waking to the plethora of texts with such a ridiculous story immediately put her in a good mood. And the blonde implying she would miss her definitely helped too.

Lindsey: That is a tragedy, however will you survive?

Hot Trainer: Which? Not seeing you or dinosaurs? Not seeing you, you’ll just have to find a way to help me with that. Dinosaurs, there is no remedying that, I needed to suffer through Apple Cinnamon. Like an adult!

Lindsey had sent a selfie after she had gotten ready for breakfast. The two continued to text the rest of the morning until Rose finally called her out.

“Who are you texting so much?”

“No one, don’t worry about it.”

“Bullshit, you have been glued to your phone all morning!” Sam joined in. “And you have such a stupid smile on your face.”

“Did Russell-wannabe-muscles, get his shit together and try to make up again?” Mal questioned

“Nice,” the two high fived with a smile and the cheesy nickname, looking to Lindsey for an answer.

“Fuck no, that’s never happening again,” the blonde midfielder replied adamantly, struggling to not pick her phone back up after hearing it go off again.

“Finally! So, who’s the new bae that has you all smitten?”

“Gross, never say that again. And no one,” Lindsey caved, picking her phone up trying to ignore Mal and Rose.

“Sonnett you are far too quiet about this,” Rose narrowed her eyes at the defender, “You know!”

“Who’s hot trainer?” Mal questioned loudly with a smile. Lindsey didn’t even notice she had left her chair and snuck up behind her, too focused on her conversation with Sara.

“Fuck, no one,” Lindsey quickly locked her phone and shoved it in her pocket.

“Oh no, that reaction definitely means it’s a someone!” Rose bounced in her seat across from her, then turned her head back to Sonnett, “What do you know!? Who is the hot trainer? Is it the trainer at your new gym?”

Rose, Mal, and Sam continued to fire questions at their fellow midfielder, occasionally pausing to discuss different possibilities between themselves.

Lindsey shrunk in on herself, the insecurities returning. Tobin and Emily had been so supportive, Sara made her feel comfortable, not that the other three wouldn’t be supportive but the sudden interrogation made it real. Real that this could be more than a crush, real that her last relationship hadn’t ended well (several times), real that her last relationship had been with a man and so had all the others. She understood that sexuality was fluid and fully believed anyone could love anyone, that wasn’t what bothered her. What bothered her was the sudden reality that this was more than a crush; that she wanted to tell her friends all about Sara, but also keep it to herself to figure out and enjoy

Taking a breath, Lindsey cut the other three at the table off while Emily sat and watched Lindsey process her thoughts.

“If you would simmer down for a second, I’ll tell you. It’s new and I don’t know what it is yet, so I’d like to keep it between us for now, please?”

At their nods, Lindsey looked to Sonnett for encouragement who smiled and nodded, then glanced down to the table and took a breath to steady her nerves.

“Her name is Sara. She is one of the trainers at the gym, we met a few weeks ago when I started training there. I trained with a couple times and we hit it off, we even went for coffee before I came to camp.”

The other soccer players weren’t phased by the news at all, quickly asking rapid fire questions again.

“Is she hot?” Mal asked first.

“Of course she’s hot, she swung Lindsey!” Rose commented with an eye roll.

“Can we see pictures?”

“Tell us about her?”

“How was coffee? Was it a date?’

“Does she know who you are?”

Horan quickly pulled up the most recent photo the trainer had sent of her and Blaze, turning her phone for everyone to see.

“She has a dog too?!” Rose asked, excited, disregarding the woman in the photo.

“That’s Blaze and that’s Sara, she brings him to the gym most of the time.”

Rose quickly lost interest in the blonde, more focused on the dog. Mal and Emily sliding closer to scroll through all the pictures.

“She’s gorgeous Linds, tell us about her,” Sam prompted, sensing the residual nerves.

“She’s great, coffee was incredible. I have no idea if it was a date, it was the first time we hung out outside of the gym. She’s so sweet and funny and smart. And so hot! Fuck, she’s so strong. Oh, she’s a firefighter!” Lindsey rambled, nervously fidgeting with the sleeves of her sweat.

“Wait, I thought you said she was a trainer at your gym?” Mal wondered.

“She is, she works as a firefighter and a trainer.”

“That’s so cool!”

The group continued to ask questions, Lindsey more than willing to answer them all. Talking about Sara to some of her closest friends made her feeling lighter than she had felt in a long time. It started to sink in the extent of her feelings for the trainer.

For the rest of the day Lindsey felt incredible. Practice after breakfast had gone so well. Vlatco pushed them right from the start, and Lindsey felt like she had played some of the best soccer she had in a long. The fitness session in the afternoon she had passed all her previous scores, she felt strong, she felt fast, she felt good. Plus, between each session Lindsey came back to phone to a message from Sara, adding to her phenomenal mood.

Even the incessant teasing from her friends throughout the day couldn’t affect her mood. And totally worth it. Like now, with them all giving her strange looks while she laughs at the text Sara sent her. She had sent her a picture of two boxes of Dinosaur oatmeal.

Hot Trainer: Lindsey! Look it! All balance has been restored in the world!

At the loud snort of laughter, the table looked at her questioningly.

“You good there Linessi?” Sonnett question with a laugh of her own.

Lindsey gave vague yupp, never looking up from her phone, replying to the firefighter.

“I take it back, I do not support this,” Rose said, gesturing to Lindsey. “All those feels over there are disgusting me.”

Lindsey didn’t even look up from her phone.

The group just rolled their eyes, leaving Lindsey to her phone, knowing there was pulling her away from it.

For the rest of the camp, Lindsey’s routine stayed relatively the same. By the end of the second week, she was drained. Camp was exhausting, practices were hard, and fitness was harder, no matter how prepared you were. Being around so many people all the time was overwhelming. All Lindsey wanted to do wanted to do was curl up in her bed and sleep. Most of the team felt the same, so had all agreed to have a quiet night in in Lindsey and Emily’s room to watch a movie. Everyone already half asleep spread across the beds and chairs in the room.

Lindsey expressed how she was feeling to Sara, the other woman showing genuine interest in how camp was going. So really, she shouldn’t be surprised at how good she felt after opening up. It had never been like that with Russel; he always reminded her it was part of the job, Sara reassured her that feeling this way was normal. Where Russel would tell her if she trained harder, she wouldn’t be so sore, Sara would suggest a different stretch to help ease her muscles and joked to give her massage. When she would vent her frustrations, Russel would get irritated, Sara let her rant and express how she felt.

Lindsey: Sorry I’m not much fun to talk to today

Hot Trainer: Lindsey, you don’t have to apologize for anything. I’m here anytime you need to vent. Want me to tell you a funny story from work?

Sara validated her and made her feel better about herself in a few weeks than Russel ever had. Hell, she made Lindsey feel better in just this conversation.

Now laying on the bed surrounded by her friends, exhausted, hardly paying attention to the movie she still felt good. Being given the opportunity to talk about how she was feeling with judgment eased the tension in her chest. Sara was telling her a funny story about how her and the other firefighters convinced their rookie he needed to remind one of the older firemen to “use the potty” before bed to mess with him. The levity of the story helping draw Lindsey’s tense shoulders down and continuing to help her relax.

The last week of camp flew by. Before she knew it, it was game day. They were playing Friday night, recovery and travel day Saturday; Lindsey couldn’t wait to be home. Lindsey had woken up to a hood luck text from Sara, who also said she would be watching the game as long as they didn’t get a call at the firehouse. Between that and getting the start, nothing could take away Lindsey’s good mood.

Knowing the blonde firefighter was watching her, Lindsey felt like she needed to impress her. And impress she did. There weren’t any nerves, she was motivated and ready to play come kick off. Right from the first whistle Lindsey was on fire; nothing got past her in the middle, she flew from box to box, nothing could stop her.

By the end of the game Lindsey had scored hat trick, plus recorded two assists, putting the US to 5-0 win. She was ecstatic, not only with the win but with how well shelf let she played the entire game. She felt like she was on such a high, roaming around the stadium taking pictures and signing autographs. Winning always felt good, but there was something about tonight, something about knowing she had someone special watching, someone that even though she knew wouldn’t judge her playing she still wanted to impress.

“Linds! You played incredible tonight!” Tobin came alongside her as they walked in the tunnel towards the change room. “Who knew all you needed was a hot blonde at home to get you to play this well.”

Lindsey gave Tobin a gentle shove, blushing and looking down. “Shut up,” she mumbled, shy because of the accuracy.

“What are you talking about Tobs, I live in Orlando now,” Sonnett joined in, slinging her arm around Lindsey.

“Wrong hot blonde Sonny,” Rose bounced past them, turning and walking backwards. “Toby definitely meant the hottie with the firefighter body,” Shooting a wink, she turned and skipped into the change room.

Lindsey again just blushed at how accurate it was. She made her way to her locker, immediately picking up her phone.

Hot Trainer: Great game superstar! You crushed it!

The other team knew they were supposed to defend you, right?

Lindsey’s smile just grew at the texts. Mal leaned over to her, “you disgust me, you know that? Even Dansby and I weren’t that gross.”

“Yeah yeah yeah, I know, I just, I can’t help It,” Horan shrugged off the teasing, more than ok with it. It was more than worth it to get to talk to Sara.

The two continued to talk as they got ready to get on the bus, Mal teasing her every time Lindsey would reach for her phone.

The next afternoon, after a quick recovery session, Lindsey was seated next to Tobin on the plane back to Portland.

“Alright Linds, what’s happening with you and your girl?” Tobin questioned once they were in the air.

“I really don’t know Tobs, we hit it off so well, this week has been great talking to her and I can’t wait to see her again this week. I just don’t know where to go from here, I want it to be more than just talking. But, but don’t know how,” the midfielder started to ramble, her nerves on the situation coming out. “What if she just wants to be friends? How do I know if she wants more? What if she doesn’t even like me?”

Tobin put a reassuring hand on her thigh.

“You’re overthinking it. She seems like she is pretty interested in you Linds. You just need to talk to her when you get home, ask her out again, make it clear you are interested. She sounds like she is pretty respectful, so I doubt she will be a jerk regardless.”

“I know; it sounds like it should be easy. She is relaxed and easy going, this whole camp she has been incredible to talk to.”

The continued to talk the entire flight, she was excited to see Sara, so it didn’t take much to convince her to tell her how she felt.

Immediately after landing, Lindsey turned her phone on, eager to talk to the blonde trainer. Emboldened by the conversation she had with Tobin on the plane, she quickly texted her asking her to talk.

Lindsey: Hey! Just landed!

Can we talk?

Hot Trainer: Uhh yea, I’m at work now. Did you want to text about it? We could call or we could do something when I’m off tonight?

Lindsey: How about tonight after you’re off work? In person would be better.

The two made plans to meet in two hours after Sara would get off work.

Lindsey rushed around her condo, quickly unpacking, starting a load of laundry before getting in the shower to get ready. Nerves returning while she thought about what she was going to say, she knew she had been vague when asking the blonde out, but she wanted to have the conversation in person. This conversation was too important to risk losing context over text.

Two hours later, Lindsey found herself waiting at the bar the two agreed to meet at, Sara coming right form work. Lindsey had chosen a quiet pub that would afford them the opportunity to have this conversation hopefully uninterrupted. She was seated at a booth near the back, legs bouncing, hands fidgeting with the coaster on the table, nerves settling low in her stomach.

The soccer player was startled out her thoughts as the object of her nerves slide into the booth across from her.

“Hey Linds, you alright?” Sara didn’t hesitate to question, her concern evident.

Lindsey sat up straighter in the booth, making eye contact with the blonde, forcing herself to stop fidgeting.

“Yea, I’m good, I just really needed to talk to you,” unable to make eye contact anymore, Lindsey looked at her hands at the table, hands resuming fidgeting.

Sara slid her hand across the table, grasping a fidgeting hand and rubbing her thumb across her knuckles.

“It’s alright Lindsey, take your time, you can tell me anything,” the trainer said soothingly.

“I know, I’m just nervous, I’ve never done this before. So maybe, fuck, just let me try and say everything and then you can ask questions? Or leave, umm which I hope you don’t, but yea,” Lindsey trailed off.

“Of course, take your time,” she repeated, still rubbing her thumb on Lindsey’s knuckles.

“So I like you, like, like like you. Fuck, I sound like a 13-year-old. But I do, I have feelings for you. I got teased all camp for being ‘smitten’ anytime we talked. These last few weeks have been great, talking to always puts a smile on my face and I look forward to seeing you at the gym every day,” Lindsey started, but then hesitated, debating what to say next. Sara’s thumb never stopping on her knuckles.

At her hesitancy, Sara stepped in, “I like you too Lindsey, as in like like you,” she mimicked. “I was so happy when you asked me out before you left, I’m not sure I would have had the guts to do it.”

Both women paused to look at each other, making eye contact they both smiled softly. Sensing Lindsey’s hesitation, Sara continued.

“I’d really like to take you on another date Lindsey Horan, if you will let me, of course.”

“Of course you can take me on another date,” Lindsey smiled, blushing. “It’s just, I’ve just, I’ve never done this before.”

“Never gone on a date?” Sara teased. “That’s fine, takes the pressure off on me to top any in the past.”

“No, I’ve been on a date before,” She chuckled to herself, but blushed, looking down again, still hesitating. “I’ve umm, never been on a date with a woman.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that Linds, we can do this entirely at your pace. Whatever you are comfortable with.”

Lindsey shook her head at that, she knew she had been nervous for nothing, how was this woman so perfect?

All her nerves before the conversation started gone, it had gone better than she could have anticipated.

The two stayed at the pub for another two hours, Sara promising to ‘woo’ her on a date when she was off next. Conversation moving on, flowing easy as usual.

Similar to when they went for coffee, Sara opened all the doors on the way out, placing a hand on her Lindsey’s back to guide her out and while walking her to her car.

“Is this ok?” the trainer asked, leaning closer to her.

“More than ok Sara,” Lindsey said, leaning even closer, pressing her side into Sara’s.

Lindsey felt like she was on fire as they walked down the street. She could feel the heat from Sara body, and solidness of her muscles; it made her want to feel more of it.

When they got to Lindsey’s car, the two blondes stayed close. Lindsey leaned against the car, boldly pulling Sara into her. Sara moved one hand Lindsey’s hip, her other hand resting on the roof of the car next to Lindsey’s head.

“I had a great time tonight, I can’t wait for this date you are going to ‘woo’ me with,” Lindsey placed both hands on Sara’s hips.

“I did too, glad you asked me out tonight,” Sara took a step back, removing her hands from the car and Lindsey.

Lindsey stood to her full height too, sensing the blonde’s hesitancy.

“You can hug me.”

“Yea?” Sara asked softly, stepping in close again, gently wrapping Lindsey in a hug at the midfielder’s nod.

Once they separated, Sara leaned down and opened the car for Lindsey. Lindsey slid into the driver seat.

The two bid each other good-bye, Sara turned and walked towards her own vehicle.

Lindsey sat back in her car, smiling as she watched the firefighter walk away in her rearview mirror.

#uswnt imagine #uswnt imagines #uswnt x reader #lindsey horan x reader #lindsey horan imagine #lindsey horan imagines

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xxmiizcornerxx · 4 years ago

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Darker the Berry (POC! Reader x Aizawa)

A/N: Okay so heres the late story I’ve promised! Sorry for the delay, my internet has been booty buttcheek and my only source of comfort has been Mario Kart 8 deluxe and my Soundcloud listening history 😣 ANYWHO~ This story is on the issues(insecurities) of colorisim. And this is for my insecure baes out there that just needs some love🥰So enjoy! (And hopefully my internet doesnt give out once im done (┬┬﹏┬┬).....)

A/N: Oh! Another side note, this is in Aizawa’s POV for the most part!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

‘Oh for fucks sake. This is just embarrassing.’

Thought Aizawa Shota, aka Eraserhead, a somewhat well known hero. At least till another well known pro hero comes around. Anyways, it was late at night and Aizawa was at a small restaurant waiting for his date to come. But by the looks of it, he probably just got stood up. Recently he has been trying to “get back out there” to not only have his comrades off his back but also because he was becoming lonely. He wanted that emotional support from someone other than his students, family and friends. Someone he could come home to every night to ramble about absolutely nothing or about everything going on in his world. And sure he had his best friend and his cat to talk to, but its not the same. He wanted that somewhat perfect love he sees everywhere he turns.

With a tired sighed, he was getting ready to leave but all of a sudden he could hear an all too annoying familiar voice. Even without his quirk, Hizashi Yamada is the loudest man on God’s given green earth. “HEY SHOTA!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” He asked loudly making the people in the restaurant jump but Aizawa was accustomed to it.

“OOH! ARE YOU HAVING A DAT-?!” Aizawa instantly covered his mouth annoyed, “How about you shut up? Anyways yeah but I was just getting ready to-” he was cut off when a 5′8 dark skinned woman with the most beautiful set of dark eyes that was barely covered by the few dreadlocks that poked out of her high bun. She was dressed in light shades of grey and white that made her skin pop out. She was truly what they called a goddess among men. “I am so sorry I’m late! I got so busy with work, I lost track of the time and decided to come straight here.” the woman rambled not fully realizing that Aizawa was too busy silently thanking whatever deity that was here for not only sending Hizashi for stopping him from walking out that door but also blessing him with the most gorgeous person he’s ever seen.

“It’s alright. My colleague here just stopped me from leaving.” He stated in his usual monotoned voice removing his hand from his friend’s mouth and sending him a look that said ‘ If you say or do something to ruin this for me, I will personally rip your vocal cords out.’, thankfully Hizashi got the memo nodding in slight fear. “Indeed I have! And now that you’re here miss, I can get what I’ve came here for and leave. Have a goodnight you two!” he stated as quietly as he can possibly get and left. “Sorry about my loud, somewhat obnoxious colleague. Here let me get your coat.” Aizawa said gently taking the woman’s coat setting it on the back of her chair. “Oh its alright, I have also been ‘plagued’ of having a very, very loud best friend. But you learn to get used to it.” she joked a bit taking her seat which only left the hero himself to take a seat. “I see. Well I don’t think we’ve properly introduced ourselves. I am Aizawa Shota, an absolute pleasure to meet you.” He said with a tiny little smile. “It’s wonderful to meet you, Aizawa. I am Y/N L/N.” she returned the smile flashing her pearly whites a bit. And with that led the beginning of a great date. The night was filled with a few laughs, a few stories about their past as children and teenage years.

Soon the two were at a park, the air was brisk and cold. The moon, stars, and streetlights illuminating their path and a small light drizzle of snow softly falling from up above. It was like a seen from a Hallmark Christmas movie, just absolutely perfect. Aizawa and Y/N were getting along great and were sitting on a bench somewhat snuggled up against one another but not quite because personal space still exists. Currently the topic of conversation landed on insecurities. Aizawa admitted to Y/N about how he felt about his own unkept look and how it took a lot of faith for him to even go out tonight. “That’s reasonable.” said Y/N, “But just in my own opinion, that unkept look is your own. Not many people can pull it off and still look as handsome.” she chuckled giving him a soft nudge of her elbow to the barely blushing man. “Well what about you? What are your insecurities?” Aizawa was genuinely curious about what she could possibly be insecure about. She was practically perfect in all aspects; has a good sense of humor, an amazing sense of style, very well educated, has more confidence than anyone he knows, and to top it all off, just carries herself respectably.

Y/N bit her thumb a bit nervous, for what she was about to reveal is going to be silly or at least that's what she thought. “Well. The thing I am most insecure about is my....complexion. As you can clearly tell I am not in anyway light skinned or even milk chocolate. And I know it is silly to be insecure about but from where I come from looking like me is a target in more aspects than one. To some being dark skinned has even been turned into a personality trait.” Without even noticing, Y/N ended on an entire rant about how her skin was and still is a target for ‘dark as night’ jokes or the ‘loud mouth, ratchet, Hot Cheetos’ girl. How people within her own community would just assume that she (and many others) fought or was angry all the time or lived in a really bad area where there was a lot of sun. Or the worst of things, that if she was a slave back then she’d be in the cotton fields. Every time she was told that or something similar, Y/N’s self-esteem would just crumble entirely. It made her feel unwanted, unloved, unnoticed, and just down right ugly. By the end of her little rant, she found herself trying hard not to cry in front of Aizawa. She didn’t really intend to just lay it all out there on the table for him, but maybe it was for the best. If they were going to continue dating then it was best for her to lay out all of the cards on the table and show him what he’s getting into.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to make everything so gloomy with my little insecurity reveal.” she said giving an awkward smile to the now stunned man. He personally didn’t understand how anyone could be cruel to their own people, let alone for how they looked. It was foolish and childish to say the least. But he was more than proud of Y/N for being able to overcome it all. “Well I’ll be honest here. I won’t pretend that I have any form of resemblance of what you must’ve gone through over the years simply because of your skin color, but I will tell you now. Your skin is beautiful and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I am willing to learn about the struggles you face and if fate allows it I’d love to be by your side as I do.” He said in a serious tone, gazing into her eyes and gently taking one of her hands bringing it to her lips planting a soft kiss upon her knuckles. “All those people in the past or in the now that has anything to say about your skin in a negative light are simple minded nincompoops' that have yet to be enlightened. After all, don’t they know?” he asked tucking a dread behind her pierced ear. “Know what exactly?” she asked with the most brightest smile that night. “Don’t they know that the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice?” That alone made Y/N laugh but Aizawa was being serious. “Boy, don’t do that. Plus how would you know?” she asked as her accent came out a little. “Well I don’t. But why don’t we find out?~” he asked teasingly leaning into her ear.

Needless to say.....

Best.

First Date.

Ever.

#aizawa x reader #bnha x poc!reader #poc representation #bhna x reader

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yoichichi · 4 years ago

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Bunny’s 200 follower event

request: omg hey babe i’m so excited- can i pls get one matchup from haikyuu and one from aot? whoever you think is best and not just bc you know how much i love asahi and hange lmaooo okay so i’m bisexual with a preference for females! i am an infp and a scorpio sun, leo moon, and gemini rising (and a scorpio venus 😳). i love writing and dancing! i love kpop (i know 😔), more specifically girl groups! my favorite is the group “twice” and i would prefer to be with someone who will listen to it with me! and i’m passionate about politics and playing the violin and piano! i’m rather introverted, very intuitive, very empathetic, and and i am perceptive. (literally described my mbti i’m so sorry) i am rather awkward and can appreciate a partner who is strong where i lack. i think i would like someone who is self-assured and able to assure me despite my severe social anxiety. i would also like someone i could extend my protective tendencies to, someone who would let me take care of them. i love to cook, clean, and bake (when i’m not being forced to) and would love someone who would let me do those things for them. i’m a rather physically affectionate person and i would NOT be able to be with someone who couldn’t match my energy. if they don’t enjoy physical affection i couldn’t be with them. i would appreciate someone who could understand my need for validation and offer it without being overbearing. i’m family-oriented and am determined to build a strong, healthy family with a partner who shares the same values. i would also prefer to be with someone who can appreciate my cultures since they’re pretty big parts of who i am! i am agnostic and would prefer to be in a relationship with someone not overly religious because religion makes me uncomfortable :/ i also refuse to be with someone who does not share my progressive views. if they wouldn’t be wearing their mask over their noses and refusing to eat out during a pandemic i wouldn’t even look their way. i’ve never had a serious relationship before and would prefer someone who has been in one and understands that i need time to adapt to it. as for a physical description i’m a little on the heavier side, i’m mexican-japanese, 5’5, have pretty pale skin, and extremely dark brown hair and eyes. i have a pear shaped figure and dude i have like no tits at all. i’m wearing a b-cup rn and i don’t fill it i hate it here. i tend to wear dark colors in comfortable fashion and i prefer modern/androgynous fashion. my pronouns are she/they!

a/n: omg hi bae!!! ALSO PLS THE KPOP PART WAS SO FUNNY and these guys better watch out before I match you with myself bae 😏 okok teehee pls enjoy ❣️ anon! Also omg this took 5 years I’m so sorry I don’t have internet until the 12th so using my data is a struggle 😭 okok I hope you enjoy!

Reading your request, you have been matched with...

(づ￣ ³￣)づ Mikasa Ackerman

LISTEN I think y’all would genuinely make such a good couple

Any of your interests she will sit and listen to you talk to them for literal hours and want to combust cause she thinks you look so fucking cute ranting about it it’s unreal

Sometimes you do have to take breaks ranting though cause she just wants a kiss so bad but she promises she’ll let you continue after a half hour of making out LMAO

Her favorite position to listen to you rant about k-drama is with your head laying in her lap while you look up at her so she can play with your hair and still see your face, and it makes it easier to steal a forehead kiss or too

Her second favorite though is when you’re ranting about work and you get particularly frustrated so she pulls you into her chest and runs her fingers down your back and the sides of your arms while you relax

If you can’t tell I strongly HC mikasa loves physical affection

I think its just easier for her to show you how much she cares through little gestures of affection - and she’s currently obsessed with the way your eyes close when she cups your face with both hands and rubs her thumbs across your cheeks so there’s that too LMAO

Massages‼️‼️

When you’re watching a movie and you rest your legs on her lap her hands just naturally start rubbing at your legs and if you get sleepy she just leans over and gives you a kiss on the cheek and carries you to bed and is so <3333333

Ok but she loves when she’s laying between your legs and her head rests on your chest and you play with her hair, like she’s out 5 minutes TOPS and she does drool a little but it’s ok cause she’s cute

Whenever you play the violin or piano in front of her she’s just so 😍😍😍like she will happily sit and watch you practice for hours cause she just loves how pretty you sound and how she can just feel your passion through the way you’re playing

Ok at first I think she’d have a hard time understanding why you take care of her like she’d come home and you’d have dinner already made and she’d just be 🧍🏻‍♀️...... w-what do you want from me LMAO

But I feel like she’d get use to it really fast and always appreciate the things you do for her

Now her heart gets so warm when she comes home and smells dryer sheets cause you did the laundry already, or if she hears the you blasting music she knows she’s probably gonna find you in the kitchen cooking dinner

Ok but Mikasa leaning against the door frame with her arms crossed and she’s just smirking and staring at you cook until you notice she’s there?

🏃🏼‍♀️🏃🏼‍♀️🏃🏼‍♀️ WHew

Omg she loves being your little taste tester while you cook and will sometimes just wait around the kitchen like 😶 until you offer her a bite and then she acts all surprised like 😯🤭 I mean ok 🤗

Ok ms quiet feet loves scaring you sorry LMAO

BUT ITS NEVER IN A teehee GOT YOU WAY

She just knows she walks quiet and she loves when she walks into a room you’re already in and you jump a little and clutch your chest she just thinks it’s the cutest thing ever

She’s one of the most appreciative people of you and adores everything about you 🖤🖤

Your vibe reminds me of...

Another suitable match for you would be...

(づ￣ ³￣)づ Iwaizumi Hajime

No cause LISTEN

THis man sees you and his knees are WEAK

Idk what it is but I just know that you’re his type like

Smth about your androgynous dark fashion catches his eye

Like he deadass watches walk across whatever room you’re in like 👁👄👁 and it’s so obvious too and you’re sweating like 👀 what’s this mf WANT

And he’s a bold mf too

Straight up just goes up to you and asks for your number yes he’s getting really sweaty and definitely is stuttering and walks away feeling 🥴

But when you text him back he is so !!!!!

Okok onto the relationship sheesh

He is so patient and understanding with you it’s unreal

The type mf to make you think like,,, damn people like this exist?

The first date y’all go on he even asks if you’re ok with him holding your hand and when you say yes he literally smiles and goes “cool :)” and his hands are so warm and big compared to yours and he keeps your hand for most of the date after that lolol

Ok but listen

Y’all went to Walmart once to get some much needed groceries and this old guy wasn’t wearing his mask right, like it wasn’t covering his nose, and iwa just s t a r e d at him like 🧍🏻

And when the guy was like ???

He went “I’m just trying to figure out how stupid you must be to not know masks cover your nose, too. 😐.”

You had to get Iwa out of the aisle before he almost got into a literal physical altercation with an elderly man LMAO

But He was like :/ I’m sorry I was dramatic inside I just didn’t like it :/ once you got in the car and he was embarrassed so much for saying something to the guy ajsksdjwij

He lets you blast whatever you want on the aux when y’all are driving even if he hates what you’re playing 😭 and he would NEVER be caught dead admitting he doesn’t like what you’re playing cause you like it so much but sometimes a song comes on and he just shoots you a side look like 👀 oh nice nice LMAO

You made him breakfast once and he cried

Like he came out and you were dishing up his plate and he just went 😐😖🥲 t-thanks

He denies it to this day though

He lovvveesss making dinner with you

It’s his perfect destresser after a bad day :(((

He loves it when you fall asleep on him too like he naps with you on accident all the time cause he’s just so big and warm and when you fall asleep on him he gets so lovey and cozy that he just dozes off and at this point he just doesn’t care about his sleep schedule anymore 😭

He’s your big ol cuddle bug :)

Your vibe reminds me of...

ongomgomg im sorry this took so long 😭 I hope you like your pairings and I can’t wait to hear from you 🥺🤲🏼

And to everyone else waiting I’m finally able to start writing again but I still won’t have internet for almost another week so they might be pushed out slowly but I’m going as fast as I can 😭❣️

Love y’all!

-🐇out

#aot matchup #haikyuu matchups #🐇200 follower event❣️

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imagines-for-the-fangirls-soul · 5 years ago

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Return to Me - Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine: Show the Way

A/N: I’m sorry this is late! I’m really trying to get back on track but school is taking up a lot of my free time. Anyways! I hope you like! This chapter brings us to the end of the Last Jedi, which means that after this I’ll have more creative choices in what happens! I’m still not sure how canon my story will be to the Rise of Skywalker, but we’ll see! As always, please comment and let me know what you think. Your kind words have really kept me going and I love talking to y’all. If you have any questions or want to be tagged, let me know, too!

Oh! Also, I want to respond to your comments, but if I did, it would be from my main bog, @agoodbitofmagic. Would y’all be cool with that, too? Lemme know!

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader Word Count: 3,968 Synopsis: With the First Order quickly catching onto their plan, Poe and the reader have to scramble to find an escape from Crait as they also try to keep their emotions in check. Final TLJ chapter!

Tag List: @xeniarocks, @too-many-baes, @araceli91103, @holybatflapexpert, @themihala, @idocarealot, @treblebeth, @treestarrrrrrrr, @thescarletknight2014, @charlottie2998, @ibikus, @mellow-f1, @mrsdaamneron, @trustme3-13 @missjess71, @ella-solei, @minelskede, @gleigh42, @usuallyweepingnacho, @givemethatgold, @and-claudia, @constantdisgrace, @wordsinwinters, @readingvogueonprivetdrive, @trshbb, @kaitlynw011, @ihave2muchtimeonmyhands, @constantdisgrace, @fairytalesforever, @thanos-jeep, @mixedfandxms, @pastelbunny1501, @emotionalcal, @daniellajocelyn, @getyourselfaunicorn, @spider-starry

Previous Chapter - Next Chapter

“What the hell?” you asked, your blood pumping fast in your veins. Before she could even argue, you raced away from Nové’s side back onto the hangar, rushing to Poe, who you hoped was just unconscious.

“I thought I'd find you on the bridge with him,” Leia said with a gentle smile, looking down at your panicked face as you crouched down next to him and brushed his stubble covered cheek with your hand. “He's only stunned, don't worry.”

“What happened?” you asked, looking up at both her and Amilyn.

“Poe’s plan was unsuccessful,” Leia said grimly.

“What about Finn and Rose?” you asked.

“I’m not sure,” she said with a shake of her head, “But—”

“We're taking the transports, aren't we?”

“We are,” she said, giving you a small smile. “Take him aboard,” she ordered. Two men walked up and led Poe onto the transport when you finally pulled your hand away from him. You watched him go before looking back, feeling both of their eyes on you.

“That one's a troublemaker,” Amilyn said with a smile, “I like him.” You raised a questioning eyebrow at her, considering that every interaction they had on board the Raddus had been disastrous. Leia laughed at both her comment and your face.

“Me too,” Leia said with a smile. “Now, time to board the transports.” You took a step towards the transport, eager to get back to Poe’s side, but as you moved forward you noticed that Amilyn did not. You and Leia both looked at her inquisitively.

“For the transports to escape, someone needs to stay behind and pilot the cruiser,” she explained. Dread dawned on you as you realized what she was saying.

“No, Amilyn, you can't—” you tried, but stopped, feeling that any argument you made at this point would be useless, especially considering the determined look on her face.

“Too many losses. I can't take any more,” Leia tried.

“Sure you can. You taught me how,” Amilyn said with a sweetly sad smile. Leia nodded her head in acceptance.

“May the force be with—” they both began.

“You go ahead, I've said it enough,” Leia laughed. Amilyn smiled back at her as she spoke.

“May the Force be with you. Always.” Leia hugged her tightly before walking to the transport, leaving you alone with Amilyn. “You need to go, too, Y/N.”

“You should come with us,” you said sadly.

“I can't. But it's going to be okay,” she said as tears began to form in your eyes. You hugged her, and she held you tightly. She was your mentor during your time in the Resistance, at sometimes seeming more like a mother to you than your own. “Keep an eye on Poe for me. He's brave, but it gets him into trouble.”

“He usually finds his way out,” you said, pulling out of her arms.

“Nonetheless. The Resistance lies with the two of you. I have a feeling you're going to be the ones to decide how this all ends. And I know you'll do amazingly,” she added when she took in your expression.

“Well, if I do it's because of you.”

“You are everything I've taught you and more, Y/N,” she said, hugging you once again. “Now, please, you've got to go. May the Force be with you.”

“You too.” You took a deep breath and began to walk onto the transport. Just as you were on the walkway, she called to you again.

“Y/N, he’s a good man. What’s past . . .” she trailed off.

“I know,” you said, smiling gently. She gave you one last nod, motioning for you to get onboard.

You found a seat next to Poe’s unconscious figure and felt tears prick once again in your eyes, just as the transport took off. Leia took a seat next to you a few seconds later, touching your back calmly.

“I don’t know how you can do this,” you said.

“Do what?”

“Fight every day. Lose people you care about.”

“It’s not easy. But it’s necessary. We have to keep fighting, so that one day, the ones we care about won’t have to lose their loved ones, too.” You frowned and looked down at Poe, brushing back his curls. A horrible thought washed over you that Poe could only look this peaceful if stunned. You didn't look away from him for a while, completely forgetting about anyone else around you.

“Y/N.”

“Hmm?” you hummed, not looking up.

“He'll be alright.”

“Today, yes.”

“And after.” You looked over at her, sitting up straight again.

“So, what's the plan?”

Leia told you about the mineral planet, Crait, that had once been a hideout during the age of the old rebellion, where you could take shelter until the First Order passed. She convinced you to leave Poe’s side and led you across the transport to speak with Commander D'Acy about a plan. Even on Crait, you were going to have to scramble to get a distress signal out. Naboo would be there in a moment, if not for the fact that your home planet was being currently occupied by the First Order.

A yell came from across the transport a few moments later, pulling you from your discussion of allies to contact when you arrived on Crait. You turned around to see Poe up off the stretcher, racing towards the window.

“No, no, no!” he cried, pounding his fist against the frame in defeat. Leia nodded to you, giving you the go-ahead to tell him what was going on. You walked over and gently touched his back.

“Poe,” you said calmly. He turned to look back at you and his face immediately fell. “Well, hello to you, too.”

“This wasn't the plan. We're supposed to be safe on the cruiser. We're—”

“Okay, okay, baby, before you keep ranting, come here,” you said, taking his hand and leading him to the other side of the transport, showing him where you were headed.

“What is that?”

“The mineral planet, Crait. An uncharted hideout from the days of the Rebellion,” Leia said, coming over. He looked back at her and instantly smiled.

“That's a Rebel base?”

“Abandoned, but heavily armored. With enough power to get a distress signal to our allies scattered in the Outer Rim.” Poe looked bewildered as Leia motioned for him to sit next to her. “Holdo knew the First Order was tracking our main ship. They're not monitoring for little transports.”

“So, we could slip down to the surface unnoticed until The First Order passes,” Poe said, realizing her plan, “That could work.” You tutted, and he took notice, kicking your foot playfully.

“She was more interested in protecting the light than she was seeming like a hero,” Leia explained. Poe nodded his head, hoping to hide his shame.

“Holdo?” he asked, looking around the transport.

“She decided to stay back with the cruiser.” Poe looked up at you tenderly, offering his sympathies without saying a word. You took his outstretched hand and frowned at him. Your gentle moment was broken up when the transport two down from yours was fired on and destroyed.

“Damn it!” Leia said, struggling to her feet. “Contact Holdo!” she ordered. There was panicking in the front of the transport, as your pilot tried to avoid the incoming fire. You and Poe ran to the front, getting to work. He took over the controls as best he could, giving his best advice for a straight shot target on limited fuel. You contacted Holdo as two more transports were destroyed.

“Should we turn around?” you asked when her holographic image formed hazily.

“No, full speed ahead!” The connection cut out as damage from a nearby ship hit yours.

“Y/N! Are you alright?” Poe asked as you stumbled into the window.

“I’m fine, we just need to get down to the planet,” you said, standing upright.

“I don’t know how. I don’t think we're not going to make it,” he said grimly.

“We just might,” Leia said, drawing both of your attentions to the back window. Amilyn’s cruiser was turning around, and you didn't need the Force to sense what she was about to do.

“No,” you said softly, feeling completely helpless as the cruiser went into lightspeed and flew through the firing First Order ship. Poe wrapped you in his arms, and you couldn't do anything but hug him back, watching the spot where the cruiser had been. Your parents, Han, Captain Zolbowl, Naboo, and now Amilyn. Since you had come back to the Resistance, the list of your fallen loved ones just kept growing and you were beginning to worry who would remain off of it.

“Full speed ahead,” Leia commanded as everyone stood in awed silence. “Now.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Once landed on Crait, Poe became Commander Dameron again. He was clear headed as he made sure everyone got inside and that the giant door protecting the base shut tight, just as the First Order came onto the planet. The door was slow to shut and during its procession, an incoming ship crashed through the closing doors. Everyone pulled out what weapons they had and fired on the fallen ship.

“Don't shoot, it's us!” a voice from inside called. Poe held up a hand and the firing stopped.

“Finn?” he called hesitantly. Finn popped his head out of the ship, hands raised, and Rose came out a moment later, doing the same.

“Finn! Rose! You’re not dead!” Poe cried happily. “Where’s my droid?” BB-8 came out of the ship, rolling straight to Poe. They embraced warmly before BB-8 began to tell Poe his story. “Buddy! I’m so glad to see you! Wait, what? Wait, wait, wait, slow down.”

“This is all that’s left?” Rose asked helplessly.

“What happened?” Finn asked, taking a step closer to Poe. He stood up and touched his arm gently.

“We’ve got a lot to discuss,” Poe said.

“And not much time to it looks like,” Finn said, motioning back to the wall, behind which were the approaching First Order ships.

“Nope. But I’ll try to explain as we go,” Poe said, leading them both over to the central part of the cave base. The controls were old and weak, but still functioning. You stood next to Connix as you tried to send out a distress signal to anyone and everyone you could think of.

“Use my personal code,” Leia said, “If there are any allies to the Resistance, it’s now or never.” You nodded at her and kept working on sending the signal out. Nové came up next to you and touched your arm. You were frantically pressing buttons, doing everything in your power to get help, and you hadn’t realized that you weren’t actually helping at all.

“Let me take over,” Nové said, “Relax, okay?” You let out a sigh and nodded your head, looking over to Poe in the corner. He looked at you in concern, but he had a lot to be concerned about right now. He was about to take a step forward when Rose walked up.

“Rose, what do you got?” he asked, moving over to her.

“Rotting munitions, rusted artillery, some half-gutted skim speeders,” she said with a frown. Poe nodded, matching her face as he let out a sigh.

“Well, let’s just pray that big-ass door holds long enough for us to get help,” he said. As he spoke, a rumble shook through the entire base, scaring off some of the Vulptexes. You all looked at each other nervously, worried that the door wasn’t as stable as Poe suggested.

“Let’s go see what that was,” he said despondently. He started to move with Finn towards the door but you grabbed his arm to hold him back.

“Poe,” you said gently. He looked back at you and saw all the fear and worry in your eyes. You had done a good job of hiding it the last few hours or so, but since your first trip back to the Resistance, you had only just been keeping those emotions at bay. With the First Order literally at their door, Poe could see every inch of that fear etched on your face

“It’ll be alright.”

“You don’t say that like you believe it,” you said with a frown.

“I’ll work on it,” he said, shedding his dark leather jacket. He wrapped it around your shoulders, which were very much exposed to the cold in your pink dress, and placed a quick, soft kiss to your temple. You gave him a weak smile as he walked off with Finn.

Peering from behind the safety of the door, Finn looked through binoculars carefully to see what exactly the First Order had brought down with them.

“A battering ram cannon,” he said. He looked over at Poe, telling him how bad it was without speaking.

“A what now?” Poe asked.

“Miniaturized Death Star tech. It’ll crack that door open like an egg.”

“There has to be a back way out of here, right?” Rose asked, trying to lift up the spirits in the room.

“BB-8, what do you got?” Poe asked, turning to look at the droids. C-3PO stepped forward to answer.

“BB-8 has analyzed the mine’s schematics. This is the only way in or out.” Poe shook his head and put his hands on his hips. He refused to give up this easily. He had promised you that everything would be alright, and he was determined to keep that promise, not just for you, but for everyone huddled inside this freezing cave. Poe began to rack his brain for what to do, just as Finn stepped up.

“Come on,” he said encouragingly, “We have allies. People believe in Leia. They’ll get our message, they’ll come. But we have to buy time. We gotta take out that cannon.”

“Alright,” Poe said with a nod, “Let’s do it.”

“Poe.” He turned his head to see Leia walking up, with you a step behind her. He jogged over to the two of you, hoping for good news.

“Anything yet?” he asked.

“No,” Leia said as you averted your eyes. “What are you going to do?”

“We’re gonna take out that cannon,” Poe said, looking back at Finn. “We’re gonna buy some time until our allies get here.” He made sure to speak with conviction so that the look in both yours and Leia’s faces would change.

“May the Force be with you,” Leia said with a sigh. He nodded his head and looked over at you. You stepped forward and touched his cheek softly as you looked into his eyes.

“Be careful.”

“I will.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

You watched nervously from inside the cave as Poe led a group of Resistance fighters out on the rickety skim speeders, watching as they headed towards a cannon that looked as if it could take them all out in one strike. As quick as they went for the cannon, they turned around, except one. You listened over the intercom as Poe ordered Finn back, and watched in amazement as Rose knocked him off course just as he was about to destroy himself, crashing both of their speeders.

When they came back inside, you helped Finn find a place for Rose and began to patch her up as Connix turned to Leia.

“Our distress signal’s been received at multiple points, but no response,” she said grimly.

“They’ve heard us, but no one’s coming,” D’Acy added. You looked to Leia, expecting to find her signature hope and reassurance, but she looked just as distraught as the rest.

“We fought ‘til the end. But the galaxy has lost all its hope. The spark is out,” she said. Poe came over to your side, the same hopeless look of defeat in his face. He sat down next to you, glancing down at your hand for a few moments before he took yours in his and held it warmly. It seemed that this would be the last of the Resistance, the last of all of you. You looked to Poe, readying yourself to say what you should have said long ago, as Leia spoke again.

“Luke.”

Everyone in the room turned to see Luke Skywalker walk towards his sister. With no clue how he got into the cave, everyone looked at him with a mix of confusion and hope. Maybe he was what you needed to escape. You looked at Poe and saw the same wish in his eyes.

“I know what you’re going to say,” Leia said with a smile, “I changed my hair.”

“It’s nice that way,” he responded, “Leia, I’m sorry.”

“I know, I know you are. I’m just glad you’re here at the end.”

“I came to face him, Leia. And I can’t save him,” he added weakly.

“I held out hope for so long, but I know my son is gone.”

“No one’s ever really gone,” Luke said. He smiled once more at his sister and then made his way through the crowded group of Resistance fighters and out the door. He walked across the salt-covered field and waited out in the open for a few moments.

“What is he doing?” you asked, watching from inside the cavern. Poe shook his head, trying to make sense of what was happening. You moved closer to get a better view of what was to happen, but you couldn’t see anything until the First Order started firing on Luke. You gasped, ready to add him to your list when the firing stopped and he was still standing there.

“How the hell?” Poe asked, looking intently at the scene as a dark figure began to make his way towards Luke. “It's Kylo R—” he began, but you shook your head. You hadn't been around your old friend in years, but even standing as far away as you were, you could feel the tension in your head that you used to feel when around him. Even this far away, it felt like he was trying to get into your mind. “Y/N?”

“I'm fine,” you said quietly, “But Luke's facing him alone. We can't just leave him—” you stopped, clenching your fist. Your head was pounding, and your heart was racing. You hadn't had to fight off this feeling for so long that you were almost forgetting how to.

“We should help him,” Finn said, “Let's go.” Poe was standing in front of you, trying to read your face. Your eyes were shut as you fought the mind trick. Poe touched your shoulders sweetly and as he did, your mind relaxed.

“No, wait, he's doing this for a reason,” Poe said, looking back at the group. You took a step back from him, wrapping yourself tightly in his jacket he lent you as you recentered your mind. “He's stalling so we can escape.”

“Escape? He's one man against an army, we have to help him, we have to fight,” Finn said.

“No, no,” Poe said. You watched him carefully, looking at him lost in strategic thought. “We are the spark that'll light the fire that will burn the First Order down. Skywalker's doing this so we can survive. There's got to be a way out of this mine,” he said, addressing the gathering group, “Hell, how did he get in here?”

“Sir,” Threepio said, stepping forward, “It is possible that a natural unmapped opening exists. But this facility is such a maze of endless tunnels that the odds of finding an exit are . . .”

“Shh!” Poe said, trying to silence him, “Sh—sh—Shut up!”

“To one,” Threepio finished, somewhat in defeat.

“Listen.”

“My audio sensors no longer detect the—”

“Exactly,” Poe said, stepping deeper into the base. He was looking around, and suddenly you realized what he was listening for.

“Where'd the crystal critters go?” Finn asked. One of the little animals ran past, seemingly following the trail of Vulptices.

“Follow me,” Poe said. You smiled, feeling prideful at his taking control. The group, however, looked to Leia.

“What are you looking at me for?” she asked in confusion. “Follow him.” Poe smiled this time, and you were the first to follow his lead. He ran after the Vulptex, keeping in step with it. Eventually, you reached a dead end. The Vulptex struggled through a crack in the wall of rocks but managed to get through. There was no way any of you could fit through the same opening.

“Well, there has to be somewhere else to go,” Poe said, trying to budge some of the boulders.

“Hey, hey,” you said, pulling him away, “Even if you could break through, you would be crushed.”

“At least the Resistance would survive,” he said, breaking free from your hands. You sighed, looking back at the gathering body behind you. Nové gave you a warning look, but you turned from her. Poe was still manically pulling at the rocks. You touched his shoulder again, this time more gently.

“The Resistance isn’t anything without you. None of us are,” you said quietly. He looked back at you and frowned slightly. “I’m sorry I didn’t say it before and every minute since I’ve seen you. I love you,” you said, grabbing his cheeks and bringing his lips to yours. He kissed you back, wrapping his arm around your waist. You kissed for the two years you lost, the pain you had inflicted in those years, and for everything you had wanted to say and do since you saw him again. When you pulled away, you smiled at him, and at the miracle surrounding you.

The boulders blocking your exit were suddenly floating around you, giving you a view of the white terrain outside. Poe smiled, too, and gave your hand a squeeze in his. Although you had never met, you recognized the girl standing a few feet from you.

“Rey!” Finn cried, running to embrace her. You couldn’t stop grinning, especially when you realized that the Millennium Falcon was behind her, a clear escape from the First Order.

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Poe asked with a smile, looking back at the rest of the Resistance. He led the way to the Millennium Falcon, but you held back. You watched him greet everyone as they boarded, checking that they were okay and that everyone left was together.

“Ready to go?” You looked over your shoulder at Nové and smiled.

“Yes, I’m just not sure where we’re going.”

“We’ll find a place. I know we will.” You both looked to your right at Leia, nodding happily at the Falcon. “Let’s go.”

You fell back from the other two as they boarded the ship until it was only you and Poe still on Crait. You approached him slowly, not wanting to think about what would happen when life finally got back to normal.

“Well, Flyboy, you did it.” He bit his lip as he smiled at you.

“Rey moved the boulders.”

“You got us here. And you kept the faith,” you said, touching his chest. “We’re going to fight another day, thanks to you.” He put his hand over yours and smiled.

“Let’s get out of here.”

#poe dameron #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron imagine #poe dameron x you #sw imagine #poe dameron fanfic #poe dameron fanfiction #star wars #star wars imagine #star wars fanfic #star wars fanfiction #sw #sw fanfic #sw fanfiction #return to me

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ourbrokeninsanity · 5 years ago

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Hulk/Reader SFW and NSFW Headcanons

Hulk is my bae. I spend too much time thinking about this so decided to share. No idea if these are any good or if anyone other than me even wants this but *shrugs*

SFW aka Hulk is a gift

Hulk is a tactile guy. If you’re ok with it, he tends to touch you a lot - a hand on your shoulder, an affectionate back pat, hugs, have you sitting in his lap or on his shoulder like an pirate’s parrot. It’s a way for him to show you affection, but also he just enjoys non-harmful touching - it’s a reminder to you but mostly himself that he can, in fact, touch people without hurting them. If you reciprocate, he’s over the moon.

So, yeah, you’re probably going to spend a lot of time in his arms. Which is pretty great, as Hulk is warm and surprisingly cosy.

Dates tend to be non-traditional - very little going out to the movies or to a restaurant here, people just don’t react well and everything is tense and no fun. You don’t mind much, the two of you find other ways to have fun. Movie nights at home in comfy clothes with loads of snacks - what could be better? Other date ideas include: playing pranks on the other Avengers/Smashers, helping him train (ie Hulk showing off his strength for you), cooking together (Hulk is fond of spicy food - he is technically from New Mexico after all, and he is always happy to eat the evidence of botched recipes. Also he is the best at kneading bread. If a recipe calls for an ingredient to be smashed he is on it, which becomes an inside joke.)

Hulk isn’t the most eloquent guy, but he’s serious about relationship negotiation. Hulk is very aware of just how much bigger and stronger he is compared to you and how the outside world would view your relationship - he needs to know that he isn’t pushing your boundaries or making you uncomfortable. If you’re willing to initiate these conversations or help him clarify his viewpoint he’s grateful - he appreciates that you understand how important this is to him.

He is protective, sometimes very protective. He’ll let you fight your own battles but he is always going to be watching, ready to wade in if he has to/you ask him to. Frankly, anyone who messes with you is on his ‘to be smashed’ list. If someone, anyone, actually hurts you (especially physically - he has the same reaction to emotional hurt but is aware that smashing isn’t always the best response here - especially if the perpetrator is a friend or relative) then they’re getting smashed. Hard. He will then stick to your side like glue, offering affection, protection, comfort and reassurance until you bat him away. This applies whether you are a superhero yourself or not.

Hulk is super supportive. He’s great to vent to, able to offer supportive silence with affirming noises and/or increasingly ridiculous and violent smash offers depending on the subject of the ranting. You try not to do so too much, aware that Hulk has enough anger issues himself, no matter how well controlled. He supports your hobbies, even if he doesn’t understand them. He may not be the most vocal cheerleader, but you know that he supports you. Really enjoys watching you do/talk about the things you’re passionate about, he finds it really sweet. He also trusts you with his hobbies - you are the one person trusted with The Zoo (also he absolutely has a figurine of you, made after he introduced you to Glorian. It’s one of his favourites. You blush when you see it).

You will fight anybody who calls Hulk a monster or a beast. Hulk will try and pull you away, but inside he is super touched. Also, he admires your left hook - for such a small person you’re a pretty effective smasher. You also get annoyed when the other Avengers treat Hulk like smashing is all he is good at - you see a side of Hulk that not many others are aware of but you insist that it’s there to see, if people bothered.

He has quite a few nicknames for you: Tiny (no matter your size you are tiny to him, Little Smash(er), Pretty Girl/Boy/One (when he’s feeling playful or wants to see you blush).

Hulk is rather protective, and proud, of the fact that you’re his s/o. Not Banner’s, his. He cared about Betty, but she loved Bruce over Hulk, and really only loved Hulk as an extension of Bruce. You, on the other hand, care and love Hulk as his own person. That means the world to him. He repays you by seeing you as you are and loving the real you, rather than what others try to paint you as. Basically, Hulk is a literal gift and you don’t understand why the world can’t see that.

NSFW (such sin, but good sin)

I personally headcanon Hulk as demisexual. As such, you’ve been together for quite a while before sexual stuff gets broached. He just notices one day that he’s attracted to you, and is honestly a little mind-boggled; when did you become so sexy???? It takes him a little time to get used to. For a little while pretty much everything you do turns him on a little and he gets all flustered. He’s very glad that his thick green skin means that his blush isn’t very noticeable.

Hulk doesn’t really have a preference for physical characteristics on a partner. Rather adorably though, once you’re together and he starts noticing you sexually, he tends to notice people who have your traits more, simply because they remind him of you. Not that he becomes attracted to them, he just notices certain traits that match or nearly match yours.

So much negotiation. Hulk is so worried about hurting you, it takes a lot of discussion and reassurance from you before he’s ready to do much more than kiss you. For this reason, you initiate pretty much all sexy times at first. Eventually he becomes confident enough in himself and his knowledge of you (your body, your boundaries) to initiate.

Because of the huge amount of discussions, your sex life is a slow build thing, which just heightens your anticipation. Like pretty much all aspects of your relationship it’s non-traditional, based not on societal expectations but on what feels good and comfortable to you both. Because of this it is very, very good. You realise you may be spoiled and now ruined for any future sexual relationships, Hulk takes such good care of you.

You tend to be on top. It makes the size difference easier to manage, and lets Hulk relax a little. He’s not going to fall on you or accidentally crush you. You approve of anything that lets Hulk relax.

Hulk is a gentle and enthusiastic lover. He is super responsive to you and enjoys instruction. Tell him what you like, guide him, beg him and just watch him light up as he gets to it. It is quite possible that your first sexual foray started out as a make-out session where you pointed out how much you like his size (”your forearms are works of art, big guy. I could get off against that wrist.”) where you precede to do just that. Hulk has a Thing about you masturbating on him, whether that’s you fingering yourself/jacking off whist you’re sat on his lap or humping his arm/thigh.

Unless you have some shapeshifting/sizeshifting/magic of some sort, penile penetration just isn’t going to be a thing, he’s far too big. Frottage is a large part of your sexual repertoire - but as you will smugly tell anyone who asks, penetration is over-rated. Hulk does not find this at all frustrating - he’d never want to do something that would risk harming you. Also his focus is on making you feel good over making you cum/orgasm - and it’s really nice that he takes the pressure off (especially if you’re female-bodied).

The absolute king of oral (fight me on this). Hulk loves going down on you, absolutely loves it. It turns him on (loves the smell and taste of you, and the noises you make, yes, give him more) and soothes his ego - see he isn’t just a monster he is also a beast in the bedroom who can make you sound like that. Whether you’re on your back or riding his face he loves it. He will totally sling your legs over his shoulders and effortlessly hold you up as he goes down on you - oral sex + showing off his strength = win. Sexual episodes where he doesn’t go down on you at some point are pretty rare, honestly. You learn some tricks to reciprocate but Hulk honestly prefers giving over receiving. He gets of on getting you off.

Also the king of making out, once you get used to the size difference (honestly you are starting to realise you may have a size kink). Lying on him, mouths locked together, scraping your nails against his scalp as you grind down on his bulk = the best way to spend a lazy afternoon. 10/10.

His fingers are the same size of other guys dicks. Do with this information what you will.

Hulk lowkey has a praise kink. He doesn’t accept a lot of praise outside the bedroom but you notice that once you’re getting down and dirty he just soaks it up, so you keep giving it to him. Tell him how good he’s doing and he just gets even more enthusiastic.

He also likes some sensation play, which you figure out after witnessing his reaction to you wearing velvet. This leads to you incorporating different fabrics and textures in the bedroom - Hulk is pretty open to experimentation (your whole relationship has been pretty experimental really, figuring out what you both want and can give each other) as long as he doesn’t feel like an experiment and it doesn’t risk hurting you). Velvet is a favourite of his.

He enjoys bathing with you. Showers can be a little awkward as he’s so much bigger, but if you have a tub large enough he’s pretty much always down to bathe with you. He loves the warm water and skin contact. He’s very relaxed and playful in the bath. Will both splash you and wash your back. Great bath buddy.

Hulk lowkey enjoys feeling you struggle against his strength. He’s not consciously aware of this, and would likely be horrified if he was - it screams harmful dominance, monster, to him because of his experiences. You are aware of it. And enjoy it. You know him using one hand to hold to hold your hips still as he gets you off (so you don’t get carried away and hurt yourself, he justifies) and enjoying the feel of you writhing and bucking against it, is a whole world away from forcing someone down to hurt them.

#hulk #hulk x reader #avengers assemble #hulk and the agents of smash #s/o #hulk imagine #hulk headcanons #monster post #can you tell i adore hulk #let me know if you enjoy these

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bodakim · 6 years ago

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Happy new year everybody ! I wish you all the best for this year 2019 :D May all your wish come true and may a lot of yuri enlight your life again.

I am going to do a few rant about tumblr and about all the yuri I love for the past year and for the incoming year :) (and you can read whatever interest you or not because yeah, my rants can be long.)

About Tumblr : I started my blog a bit more than a year ago now (I never posted on it before). The main goal was being able to fangirl about all the yuri I love when I couldn’t really do so somewhere else (or more likely, not as much as I wanted). Obviously I wanted to show my love to Kumirei everyday as well. And gosh, I am pretty surprised because in a bit more than a year, you are almost 7700 to follow this blog and I am like “wow, that’s a LOT of people”. So thank you for following my usual yuri ranting (or shitpost, depend), I didn’t expect so many people to be there but yeah. I will keep doing the same for this year. Obviously I don’t agree with the new Tumblr policy about NSFW (I find it... Pretty stupid. It has good intention, but it’s really really badly done) but I won’t stop this blog because personally, even if I do post NSFW from time to time (there’s an amazing Kumirei doujinsh cover I would have loved to share... RIP) but most of my post are shitpost or safe for work so it doesn’t really affect this blog. (And it’s still the easiest place for me to fangirl).

About Hibike : This year was pretty amazing with Liz to Aoi tori release. This movie is just gorgeous (please watch it if you haven’t yet). The movie has even been screened in the USA and is now planned in France ! I am so happy the Hibike fever is starting again. The movie gave me so many emotion, too. As I’ve mentioned, I am just a bit sad (like after this Comiket period) there were so less Kumirei doujinshs. Talking about that, Oath’s finale is coming up in april and I am both excited and worried about the movie. I know there might be a lot of Kumirei cute scenes because I heard there’s some in the novel. Actually my worries are pretty much over : I was a bit scared about the eventual shoe Kumiko (even though it’s not that way even in the novel). I wouldn’t have minded Kumiko ending up with anybody tbh, as long as it’s logical and they have a great bond (because we can’t really complain about something like that, even if we can be disappointed) but... Not him. Because I think Kumiko would be more hot and bothered by a cube of ice than the Shoe. I am looking forward for the first movie impression by people in april and I really hope the movie could lit the Kumirei fire inside people heart once again (and a lot of gay merch pls Kyoani).

About My Unrequited Love : this serie became clearly my favorite serie along Yagate. Maybe the fact I am working on it helps big time, but I absolutely adore all the characters and the pacing. I do love angst as much as I love fluff and I don’t mind slow pacing. I am conscious this kind of story isn’t for everybody (according to the complain I read also), I do think personally this is a really “real” slice of life. In a way that tMnR is really good to show the different point of view of the characters (and how a scene can be totally different depending of who saw it... That’s why I don’t mind the skip after chapter 14) and the serie take its time because yes, sometimes in life, not a lot happen and people are mixed with their own struggle. They can have some issue because they don’t talk with each other and I love how it’s done here. I am really looking forward to see how the story will progress (starting from february because this month, we get the volume 4 release). And tMnR is love.

About Yagate : The anime just ended and gosh, it was really an amazing anime. I would even say so far probably my favorite yuri anime released (and by that I mean “really yuri labelled” since i consider Hibike as yuri too). I love the way they adapted the serie, they did their very best and you could really feel it in the animation and all the adaptation idea like with the background play and the metaphore (though they were some animation quality drop for some episode, but we can’t complain about that). I really hope they will be able to do a season 2 to match the manga ending! I don’t think the manga should end this year (with probably one more volume after this one), or more likely at the very end of the year. I am really looking forward to follow Yuu and Touko. I can’t wait for them to be finally happy together and seeing them as a couple. (And I do hope for a great girlfriend for Sayaka! She really deserves love).

About Citrus : Citrus main serie ended in 2018, letting place to the spin off Citrus plus that started in december. It’s an odd feeling since it’s a serie that really affected me and helped me during quite some time of irl struggle (I started it back in 2013-2014) and I have a special thing with this manga. The animation at the beginning of 2018 was maybe not the best, but surely a kind of dream coming true that made us fangirl big time. Citrus has also been my main manga collection so it is a huge part of my life. Unfortunatly, though I still enjoy reading Citrus plus because I am curious about it, it’s not my number one serie anymore (after a volume 10 that left me a bit... Meh). I am still really curious to see what Saburouta has for us in 2019. About other series : I started quite some yuri series in 2018, and so there’s a few things I want to mention

I started 2DK G pen, and it is a really great yuri. The manga just finished in Japan this year, and I am pretty surprised it wasn’t picked by SevenSeas to be released in english book. The pace is slow but the manga is great and popular in Japan, so I would really like if they could pick this one someday.

I started Nettaigyo too... Lesbians + aquarium = <3 (I can’t do a faster summary, this is just amazing)

I watched Bandori (BanG Dream!) anime with a friend, and recently she convinced me to play the game... And gosh it really got me. I got myself a new bae (with Rinko) and some new ship I love. (Fun fact: Misaki x Kanon : Misaki is voiced by Tomoyo Kurosawa, Kumiko’s VA while Kanon is voiced by Toyota Moe, Midori’s VA. So Bandori is the only place you can ship Kumiko with Midori x’) ) There’s a lot of other ship I love, but damn.

And I think that’s it for the ranting... Happy New Year again, and looking forward for more yuri :D

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yaz-the-spaz · 5 years ago

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oh absolutely! i agree we shouldnt give a full pass. i just find it exhausting in the grand scheme of things. im very pessimistic about these things sometimes. it pisses me off that people can wear my culture as a costume, but when i want to do something simple like carry a fucking eagle feather at my high school grad, the world ends. i just struggle with thoughts like, what is The Point here. anyways, if anyone likes the aesthetic, please buy from a native crafter! we love 2 share our culture❤️

(2) anyways thanks for entertaining my rant. youre great ❤️

awww you’re the one that’s great nonnie! i love having these kinds of discussions so thank you nonnie for giving me a reason to talk about it and highlight it more (and hopefully educate some ppl in the process) lol, and tbh i totally agree with you on finding it exhausting and getting pessimistic about it, racism’s so fucking pervasive and a lot of white people don’t even realize just how pervasive it is (because they have the luxury of not having to deal with it)...every time i see a little white girl in cornrows or ‘boxer braids’ as they’ve been apparently renamed i wanna fucking scream and slap both her parents in the face, every time i see some white woman online doing a hair video on bantu knots or whatever ‘new’ way they’ve discovered to try and make their hair ‘fuller’ and more ‘curly’ (aka more like black people’s) or rocking some nasty ass fake ass dreads i wanna fucking rage because it’s the same goddamn hairstyles that black people have not only been persecuted and ridiculed for for centuries but are literally still being persecuted for to this very day by being denied entry to schools, fired and/or denied access to jobs, competitions and events, told their hair is ugly or unprofessional and doesn’t fit certain standards or requirements to be allowed in a particular place or event. but when white people do it it’s suddenly ‘trendy’ and ‘cute’ or a new fashion statement. and it’s the same for our language/the way we speak. when we do it we’re called stupid or told we don’t know how to speak english right and need to learn how to speak ‘proper’ english (nevermind that there’s tons of other recognized and legitimate dialects of english besides the the ‘standard’ or ‘proper’ one and ours is also one of them), but white people start talking like us online and they look ‘cool’ and ‘hip’ or they suddenly discover some ‘new’ (read: old) word or some ‘new’ thing that we’ve been using or doing for decades and then literally won’t. stop. fucking. using. it. to the point where it gets so overdone and overexposed/played out that even us black ppl don’t wanna use our own words anymore (thinking of twerking here, or ‘bae’). anyway now i’ve become the one that’s gone on a rant i didn’t even mean to go on lol but once again thanks for giving me the opportunity to vent and if you ever wanna come off anon and talk more about racial discourse or ziam or literally anything really lol, my proverbial door is always open nonnie :)

and p.s. i just pray that we’re* not still here explaining shit like this to white people a century or more from now

#asks #anons #cultural appropriation #racial discourse #*we as in poc's not necessarily you and me specifically #although with the ways science could go who knows you and me personally could also still be here explaining this shit too #i hope not though lol #also yessss babe get that native crafter promo in!

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speckofglitter · 6 years ago

Text

get it together - kny

→ word count ; 1.3k

→ genre ; fluff | angst if you squint ??

→ pairings ; artistl!yoshinori x artistl!y/n

everything is an art form. yet you always seemed to have the wrong paintbrushes or a shaky hand.

yoshinori is lying on his bed, watching you paint. he's admiring you, eyebrows furrowed and tongue poking out as you try to mix the right shades together. you've been working on this painting for the past 3 hours and it still doesn't look quite right. you step away from your canvas, observing it at a different angle before giving up.

you sigh, settling down onto the bed next to yoshinori as he gives you an encouraging smile.

'i'm tired.' you sigh out.

'then let's sleep.'

'yoshi?' you mutter.

'hmm?' he responds.

'can you give me a goodnight kiss?' you plead. he widens his eyes in disbelief, making you laugh out loud.

'fine.' he moves closer, placing a quick kiss on your cheek before licking your cheek and running away.

'argh yoshi that's disgusting!' you yell out, running after him.

yoshinori is your best friend and lifeline. he's the only one keeping you sane. you rant to him about your struggles as an art student, the exorbitant prices of art supplies and about how much your art teacher absolutely hates your guts. you sleep over at his apartment anytime you have a big assignment due. he keeps you calm. you still remember the day you met him. you were in the campus art studio, having a panic attack. you looked like a shell of a human being, shoulders hunched over as you cried over your sketchbook. yoshinori had walked in, choosing to sit beside you, softly stroking your hair as you cried and explained your frustrations. if he hadn't been there you probably would have ended up breaking your expensive crayons and brushes in half. he was so approachable and warm. you supposed there were no strangers in yoshinori's world, only new friends. you two quickly became inseparable after that day.

you wake up to an amazing smell. yoshinori's side of the bed is empty so you look around, trying to find him. he always makes your favorite nutella pancakes when you sleep over. it's become a tradition.

'come in.' he says, turning around to find you peeking from behind the kitchen door.

'good morning, thanks for the breakfast.' you smile, giving him a quick hug as he flips another pancake. his hair is still slightly damp from his shower, the smell of his cotton candy shampoo engulfing you.

you settle down onto the table, scrolling through your instagram feed as yoshinori finishes making the pancakes.

'yoshi, do you think i can make it as an artist?' you ask in between bites.

yoshinori looks at you, stunned by your sudden question. you take a huge bite of pancake, nervously waiting for his answer.

'i know you will.' he answers after a moment.

'you do know mr. clent hates me right? i haven't gotten a single grade above a B this whole semester...' you whisper.

'it's not always about the grades, especially in a creative field. when i see your art, i feel like it's going to jump off the canvas and come alive. your art tells stories that no one else can tell. that's your weapon.' he explains.

he smiles at you and it's that smile. the smile that makes you feel like all of your dreams can come true and everything will be okay. you stuff another bite of pancake in your mouth, desperately trying to ignore the way your heart is pounding inside your chest.

'you're a really good talker mr. kanemoto' you shake your head, trying to hide your smile.

after a quick shower, you're back to painting. a weak stream of light peers through the small window in yoshinori's room, making you look angelic.

you hear beeping and turn around to see yoshinori on his phone texting. sometimes, you wished yoshinori wasn't so popular. he wasn't only liked by students, he was also mr. clent's favorite student. the promising art prodigy. whenever there was an art exhibition, girls would flock to his side. they would ask irrelevant questions about his artworks, mostly interested in the way he would sip white wine and arch his perfect eyebrows as he talked about technique and color theory. surprisingly, he never worked on his drawings in front of you. he probably didn't want you to have a mental breakdown over how talented he was compared to you. you turn back around, painting more aggressively this time.

is it normal to feel slightly envious?

'wanna get some coffee?' he asks.

'yes please, i feel like i'm going to go insane if i see one more speck of gold' you laugh, grabbing your cardigan from his chair.

you walk towards the campus café, noticing the cold breeze as you wonder how yoshinori can wear ripped jeans in this weather.

yoshinori rests his hand on his chin, staring at you with an endearing look. you're ranting about yet another annoying professor as he swirls his straw around, taking frequent sips of his matcha latte. you talk with your hands, bright eyes twinkling as you get to the key point in your story.

yoshinori thinks about how fitting your drink choice is, a caramel macchiato. you pretend to be a bitter artist yet deep down you're the sweetest person he has ever met. you're always frustrated because you run on hope. hope that the world would be a little better, a little kinder. he memorizes the way your lips purse as you take a sip, planning to make you his next project. for him, it came easily. the lines and the shapes came together in his head as soon as he saw you.

summer is settling in and you no longer have to worry about strict professors and artist statements. it's 9pm when you burst into yoshinori's apartment, a tiny bottle of red wine in your front jean pocket. yoshinori doesn't bother asking questions as he lets you in.

'you know that guy i went on a date with last week? i can't believe that jerk ghosted me.. you know what? fuck him he looked like a noodle anyways.' you yell out, walking past yoshinori to sprawl yourself onto his couch. yoshinori chuckles to himself, watching you drink straight out of the tiny red wine bottle. even during rough times you absolutely refused to drink hard liquor.

you notice that yoshinori is drying his hair with a fluffy looking pink towel as he sits next to you. you try not to stare but he looks really, really good.

'not to put you down when you're having a rough time but could you take some of your skincare products home? your 13 bottles of rosewater and clay masks are taking up all the counter space in my bathroom.' he says, running a hand through his damp hair.

'fine. guess i'll just be bae-less and ugly.' you scoff, placing your legs over his.

'you're neither of those,' he whispers.

'what did you just say?' you raise an eyebrow.

he freezes, pink towel in hand as he realizes his mistake.

'i said... you're neither of those. you're beautiful y/n, i've told you that countless time.' voice not coming out nearly as steady as he would have hoped.

'yeah but i'm still bae-less' you whine.

'i could be your bae...' he mutters.

you picked a horrible time to take a swig of wine because the moment yoshinori says that you spit a mouthful of red wine right into his face.

'oh my god i'm so so sorry' you say as you grab the pink towel in his hands, dabbing onto his skin. you didn't realize you were so close until yoshinori places his hand above yours, taking the towel before kissing you softly. he hooks his hands around the back of your thighs as you wrap your legs tightly around his torso. your palms splay across his chest, pressing into him. you taste a little bitter and a little sour from the wine but yoshinori doesn't mind. you let out a small whine of protest as your lips separate.

'i can't do this anymore. i can't pretend not to be into you anymore.'

'i like you too yoshi.... we could be together but you know... i should really to get my shit together before i try to be in a relationship...' you mumble.

'i don't need you to get your shit together y/n. but if you need help, i'll always be here for you. as your friend or as your bae. you call the shots.' he winked.

you thought it over for a few days, isolating yourself in your room as you survived on cubes of cheese. yoshinori was beginning to think he had made a huge mistake by confessing to you. maybe you just weren't ready.

yoshinori had always been there for you, a little too generous if you were honest. you weren't scared of him breaking your heart. you were scared that one day he would wake up and realize he could do better. knowing him, he would probably break it to you in the kindest way possible. your mind wandered back to the first day you met him. if he wasn't ready to be in your life, he wouldn't have sat and comforted you for hours. he wouldn't put so much time and effort into making you pancakes every time you were at his apartment. he wouldn't have been the one and only person who motivated you as an artist.

you suddenly get up, putting on your sneakers as you rush to your kitchen cabinet, grabbing a bottle of vodka. you had never run so fast in your entire life. by the time yoshinori opens the door, you're out of breath and glowing with sweat.

'what are you doing here?' he questions.

'you said i could call the shots so i'm here.' you say, walking past him and into his kitchen as you look for shot glasses.

'let's cheers to us, being baes or whatever the kids say these days' you laugh, pouring him a shot.

as yoshinori watches you down your shot, he silently thanks whatever or whoever guided him to the art room on that day.

masterlist - requests are open !! - ya girl tiyi ❤️

#ygtb #treasure #magnum #treasure 13 #treasure 13 scenarios #magnum scenarios #yg entertainment #yg artist scenarios #kanemoto yoshinori #kpop fluff #kpop au #kpop scenarios #yg treasure box scenarios

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attraversiamo19 · 6 years ago

Note

For the fanfiction questions: 11, 14, 19, 40, 45 and 51! Sorry I chose so many, I just genuinely want to hear your answers!

Holy moly anon that’s a lot of numbers! Okay here we go...

11. Who is your current OTP? God I can’t pick just one? I’m a multi-fandom and multishipping hoe... Ereri, Erejean, Jeanmarco are all up there in SNK fandom but if I had to choose one forever OTP it would be RoyEd from FMA. They were my first ship and they will forever be my baes.

14. Go on, who are your BroTPs? OH OKAY SO this one is easier. Erejean obviously is #1. I also love Springlestein (brot3? yeah?) a whole lot. In FFXV fandom all the Chocobros in any combination but the four of them are just ughghggh, best boys 100%. And the Elric brothers? Are actual brothers but they still count shhh.

19. Is there a ship which you wished you could get behind, but you just don’t feel them? Oooh so I think I’d go with Eruri for this one. There’s gorgeous art that I appreciate very much, and I’ve read some really incredible Eruri longfic that I’ve enjoyed a LOT, but despite that the pairing just doesn’t spark for me, if that makes sense? I can definitely appreciate it in some ways and I’ll always love the art, but I don’t actively seek it out.

40. What do you struggle the most with in your writing? HAHAHAHAHA good one anon. Actually doing it, probably. Finding the motivation to focus on it. It’s been... a good couple of months since I’ve felt inspired to sit down and work on any WIPs, so many other distractions and things I’ve been more excited about. Sigh.

45. What is your all time favourite fanfic? Oh holy shit okay. So. We’re back to RoyEd here. Favorite fic of all time that I can (and do!) go back to over and over again is actually the Loud and Clear series by @tierfal. It’s (kind of?) a coffeeshop AU that becomes so much more than that and it’s just... fucking brilliant. Characterization and world building? All the fluff? Painful angst? Perfect smut? SO MUCH humor??? Fucking kill me it’s perfect. And if you’ve never read RoyEd - great news, you can still SUPER enjoy this fic because the themes translate to everything everywhere. Just think of it as original fiction. Or better yet read it and I will convert yet another to RoyEd and Tierfal YOU WON’T REGRET IT I PROMISE.

51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go! I fucking LOVE how I can lose myself in 100k+ worlds of fiction and that there are authors out there who are inspired enough to write that much for us. Wow we are so fucking blessed in fandom like holy shit??? I’m a binge reader for sure and it’s so wild to just sit down, block the world out, and be a fly on the wall while my faves go through hell and back again. Anybody who shits on fanfic writers or relegates them to some sort of ranking below “real” writers can fuck right off. I can legit say of the fanfic I have read and some of the authors I return to time and time again: I enjoy your content a hell of a lot more than a lot of “real” fiction out there. So I guess that’s a love and hate rolled into on. Fanfic is amazing, and people who shit on it are dumb.

ANYWAY tonight is apparently “SJ writes novels for answers” so if you want more ask me about fanfic stuff!

#anon tbh I was overwhelmed seeing your list #but damn these were fun ones to answer #answered #sj speaks #Anonymous

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hopeishappinessff · 7 years ago

Text

Holding Onto Hope: Chapter 12.1

Hope

The entire campus was in a jovial spirit in the days leading up to the first basketball scrimmage before the start of the season. There were black, bright red, and white flyers hanging left and right in every building. There were events covering every inch of the nearest calendar from campus pep rallies, to parties and gatherings. There was even an unnecessary parade arranged by the city of Athens just for the basketball team! It was all a bit overwhelming since it wasn’t even a real game, but I took in every bit of it and couldn’t deny the sense of excitement I felt from it all. I was excited for the scrimmage, I was excited for the team, but most of all… I was excited for Chris. It was all that I could hope and pray that the lively environment would outweigh whatever funk he was in, but his peculiar behavior just panned out longer, forcing me to believe that something was seriously wrong. He attempted to put on a happy façade, but I knew better. I had a knack for recognizing his troubles and although I knew something was wrong with him, I fell back from the matter to ease the unwanted tension. I didn’t know whether he was putting on the entire façade for the upcoming game, or if he was really trying to fool me into believing he was his typical self again. Whatever it was, I simply had to accept it for what it was and keep moving. With the scrimmage only hours away and people steadily pouring onto campus to wait in the smoldering heat for the arena doors to open, I had hopes that Destani, Cammie, Angel, and I could get there in time for decent seats. Although Chris deliberately pushed a set of four near court side tickets into my hands, promising me that no matter what time we arrived the seats would be vacant, I feared that these die hard Bulldog fans would claim the seats with no shame. It also didn’t make matters any better that with no regard to the time quickly ticking away, Destani forced me to set out on a mission through the overwhelming congested center of campus to find Taylor. He’d told her that him and a few of the other players would be in the Athletics building just before the game and he wanted to see her before setting foot on the court. Following closely behind Destani, I kept my eyes balanced between the uneven pavement beneath me and the untamed tresses of the back of her head, focusing hard on not tripping. She was nearly running and I was trying to keep up with her so we wouldn’t get separated in the crowd.

“Dez, slow down please.” I yelled over the commotion of the crowd.

“So we can get there late and have Tay play horrible ‘cause he couldn’t see me, I don’t think so!” She yelled in return, not even bothering to turn her head in my direction so I could fully hear her. She tugged on my hand as if I were a child about to get lost in a sea of predators, but I couldn’t complain. If it just so happened that we got separated, we probably wouldn’t even be able to use cell phones to find each other in this mass of loud people. With the front doors of the building visible ahead of us, she tugged harder on my hand until she was within reach of the double glass door handles. With a huff, she pulled me through and finally slowed her pace.

“Geez Destani… do you know how many times I almost fell back there?” I complained, whipping loose strands of hair back into the messy bun at the top of my head.

She giggled and sighed, catching her breath after our long hurdle through the throng of obsessed fans “I’m sorry, but that’s how you gotta navigate with these damn crowds… people be wanting to stop all in front of you like you ain’t in no damn hurry. Don’t nobody have time for that.” Rolling my eyes at her rant, I sighed and eyed our new surroundings. The building itself was fairly large and there were weight rooms left and right down the span of the hallway. The scent of sweat and laborious exertion permeated my nose and a sudden waft of remorse washed over me. I couldn’t even imagine what these boys went through day in and day out during their practices. The loud vibration of male voices suddenly surrounded us and I squinted in an effort to spot the source of the commotion. I had even failed to realize that Destani was still speaking to me in a low mumble.

“… and I guess you completely forgot that Chris is probably somewhere here too.” I stared at the back of her head as I tuned in to her words. I hadn’t actually acknowledged that realization and I could no longer control the abrupt excitement I felt after hearing her words. “Babe.” Glancing over Destani’s shoulder, I spotted an ecstatic Taylor rushing toward us from a weight room off to the left side of the hall. Destani squealed and skipped a few steps away from me, greeting Taylor as he quickly stepped up and wrapped his arms around her tiny waist. She threw her arms over his shoulders and pecked his awaiting lips a few times, grinning widely as if she hadn’t just seen him a day ago.

“Hey bae.” She whispered gently, ogling at him as he reached to resituate of few of the curls on her head. I shook my head and smiled at the adoration they showed for one another, suddenly remembering those same feelings that I shared for Chris. “’Sup Sy?” Taylor smiled my way and released Destani from one of his protective arms. I reached out to hug his left side, smirking slyly at Destani as her cheeks flushed. The familiar sight of her openly wearing her esteem for Taylor on her shoulders prompted me to tilt my head past Taylor’s broad shoulder in search for one particular bulldog. “Aw, he ain’t here yet Sy.” He said.

Raising my brows and dropping my gaze, I sighed and mumbled a low “oh” before stepping back from Taylor. From the corner of my eye, I could feel Destani staring at me, clearly catching on to my sudden gloomy demeanor. Ignoring both her and Taylors stares, I smiled at Taylor and blinked back my frustration “So, are you ready to face the crowd tonight?”

Glancing first at Destani, Taylor acknowledged my silent plea to overlook the topic and move on. He smirked and licked his lips, suddenly staring off into space as if he were some high-profile celebrity posing for a magazine “Well, I mean I’m just ready to get out there and… and give the fans what they want.”

Lightly smacking her lips, Destani rolled her eyes and poked her index finger into his side “Boy stop that… the fans don’t want you.” Leaning to accommodate her short stature, he meshed his lips with her forehead and gripped her closer to his side “Actually they do babe. I know you saw the crowd out there. They feigning over us like some fucking crackheads.” With her lovable features quickly contorting into a frown, Destani scoffed and crossed her arms over her chest. Taylor only chuckled and readjusted his arm over her shoulder. I laughed at the sight of her lips pouting out like an irritated child. It was truly hilarious to me that she was always able to manipulate people with her innocent features and expressions. Taylor opted to keep us there with him and the other players until the very last minute, refusing to believe that there was a problem with us loading onto the shuttle with them to head to the gym. Destani, completely immersed in his presence alone, saw nothing wrong with the idea either and I could only be thankful that I was present to prevent her from getting onto the shuttle with them. She pouted a bit more and put me through nearly five minutes of torment when she engaged in a full-on slobber session with him just feet away from me, but she ultimately gave up the fight and walked with me back out into the dwindling crowd. -- “Okay, so one more mothafucka back the hell up on me like they don’t see me fucking walking through here, & I swear I’m swinging.” Cammie fussed as we struggled through the main doors of the Stegeman Coliseum. The amount of people teeming through the doors would fool anyone into believing that we were ducking into a concert hall full of celebrities and I was completely enthralled with the sight and even more astonished with the size of the inside of the arena. I was quite positive that every seat in the place would be full in less than an hour. Struggling through the high archways of the gymnasium, we were finally within reach of the elevated bleachers. We pushed through a thick line of people searching desperately for seats and the anxiety quickly set in… I was sure someone had already claimed our reserved spots. Fortunately, a few minutes later we found our seats pretty quickly and thankfully, they were vacant.

“These damn security guards better be lucky these seats empty… if one bitch and or nigga woulda been sitting here, oh Lord… blood would be shed.” Destani threatened. Both Cammie and Angel laughed and eased behind me into the empty seats. I could only shake my head at Destani’s fussing and sigh with relief. The game didn’t start for another thirty minutes, and with Destani complaining for food at my side, I decided to head down to the concession stands with her, leaving Cammie and Angel in the stands to monitor our seats. I already knew the line would be ridiculous before we rounded the corner to see the extent of it, and much to my dismay, I was completely correct. The line itself stretched to the furthest end of the concession area, curving a bit to fit everyone into the space. Groups of people waited impatiently for their orders to the left of the line, which gave the illusion that there were more people waiting to order food then there really was. Not wasting a minute, Destani swooped my hand into hers and swiftly guided me to the end of the long line. Finding our place at the end, I took the time to occupy myself by people watching. There were several people, females in particular, dressed in Bulldog apparel. Several wore only the colors, either coordinating shirts and accessories, or going all out with body paint and tattoos. After a while I started to notice that several, if not most, of the student body seemed to advertise their favorite player. With a few glances in just about every direction, it became quite clear to me that just about everyone in my near proximity wore the same familiar double digits… #20. Whether it was the simple fact that they adored him for his skills or for something more, I wasn’t sure. I took one last glance at the identical numbers on the backs of a group of girls who squeezed past us and decided to let the thought go. Cruising through the line much quicker than I’d anticipated, Destani ordered herself a burger and we headed back to the stands just minutes before the countdown until the start of the game. ….. With forty-three seconds still on the clock and each player positioned strategically on the court, I leaned forward with an anxious twitch and chomped down on my bottom lip. I was quite sure my mouth would be completely red and raw by the end of the game, but I didn’t care… the boys were tied with the South Carolina Trojans at ninety-eight points. The clock ticked steadily, showing no remorse for who would lose, as the Bulldogs moved swiftly down the court with the ball in their possession. Thirty-one seconds now… 102-98. The ball was back in the possession of the Trojans and I spotted Chris crossing an oversized, aggressive guy from the opposing team. With no intent of letting Chris find his man, the one guarding the ball, the oversized Trojan pushed against him with most of his body weight, attempting to send him flying to the floor. Chris, however, had already been blazing through the game with every ounce of hostility aimed at the opposing team. There were even a few occasions where he was benched, not by the refs, but rather by his coach because it was obvious that the rage was rearing its hideous head. I watched him closely, zoning out every other aspect of the game. The guy managed to bump him just slightly from his path, which was more than a blunder on his behalf. I rose to my feet before my body could catch up with my mind. He turned in a flash, glowering at his opponent with less than zero interest in the game, or anything going on around him for that matter. Time slowed to a near halt and so did the clock as I imagined, in horror, what Chris was soon to unleash if he couldn’t keep it together. A shade of deep crimson seemed to rise from the depths of his cheeks to his forehead as he stepped closer to the husky, slightly larger guy. His appearance was that of a human lethal weapon. With a heavy layer of perspiration sheathing his arms and face, and fists clinched tightly at his sides, pushing the veins in his arms to the limit… he looked almost like a cold blooded murder before the very eyes of hundreds of fans and onlookers. I could feel my body trembling in utter fear of what was to come… and what was worse was that I didn’t think there was any way I could even get his attention just to give him a moment of serenity to simply calm himself. I’d completely disregarded the four tickets he’d given me though… and the reality that he knew exactly where we sat in the crowded stadium. Closing his eyes for a split second, he abruptly turned his gaze toward the section of seats situated directly in front of section E of the stadium. It didn’t take long for his darkened orbs to connect with my own and I held his gaze for dear life, fearing that if I faltered even a bit, he was sure to have a meltdown in the middle of the court. I pleaded with him through my eyes alone, begging him not to let a simple competitive push from a guy twice his size get to him. A sudden nudge against my right arm broke my stare and a gasp fled my lips as I snapped my head in Destani’s direction.

“Sy, they won!” She shouted, clapping loudly to match the uproar of the crowd around us. I blinked back my confusion and turned to face the court. 104-98. The bright red neon numbers leapt out at me, confirming that they’d actually snagged a win. Turning my attention back to the ecstatic players on the floor, I searched frantically for any signs of Chris. It’d all happened so fast. One second, I was silently pleading with him to keep his temper under control through only a stare, the next… Chris had suddenly disappeared and the Bulldogs had won. Chris The damage had nearly been done. He had nearly been unleashed. In the middle of the court… in the middle of the damn game. And it was shit like that that had me in a therapist on a weekly basis, trying to get a better understanding of what the hell was happening to me. I could feel myself on the verge of blacking out, but I didn’t understand why and that genuinely scared me. It was the power of a simple second of eye contact with that captivating ice blue stare that saved me. It was absolutely amazing to me that all Hope had to do was look at me, hold my gaze, to give me the strength to calm down. This girl, this… heaven sent angel, was perhaps the only person in the world with the incredible ability to calm me down just by looking at me! She was the reason that, on so many occasions, I’d been able to withstand my own anger and not make a complete fool of myself. Yet, I could no longer bring myself to even touch her with the hands of filth that I’d tainted because of my, “problem”. It literally killed me to know that she was so determined to keep me from hurting myself and those around me, yet all I seemed to do on a daily basis was hurt her and she didn’t even realize it. Out of her presence and away from the watchful eyes of many admirers and fans, I stormed through the wide walkway leading to the locker room. I needed to distance myself from her for a while, because for some reason I couldn’t bring myself to look at her any longer after what she’d just managed to do. Barging into the locker room before the rest of my teammates, I sped to my locker area, snatched up all the necessary shit for a shower, and headed back toward the stalls.

“Man, I can’t believe we just won that shit dawg. That shit was too fucking close man!” The loud and slightly annoying voice of Shawn blasted through the atmosphere, followed by several other teammates. They all cheered and hollered like they’d just won the damn super bowl and I closed my eyes in an effort to drown out their obnoxious voices. Their voices grew to an annoyingly high level and I leaned against the cool tiles lining the wall, heart racing as I waited for them to ‘round the corner and bombard my moment of peace. “Breezy, yo… that was a sick ass game, huh?” Shawn half yelled, directly in my face. I glared at him with a blank face. With him being the damn loud mouth that he was, I wasn’t expecting him to read my obvious irritation and move on, so I simply held my breath and counted to the highest number my patience would allow.

“And dawg, let me tell you… I see exactly why they got your ass straight from Syracuse… nigga, you are a beast!” Slamming his hand down on my shoulder, he grinned wide and nodded his head. The frown on my face could not be measured as I took in the length of his arm and finally the hand that rested on my bare shoulder. Literally a second before I could feel myself about to snap, Taylor rounded the corner behind Shawn, shower gear in tow, and snatched his intruding hand away from my arm “Step up out the man’s space Shawn, damn.”

If there was a way to send my thoughts of appreciation directly to Taylor for his sudden appearance, I would… Shawn was mere seconds from enduring a great rush of pain against the side of his face, compliments of my hand and the cold tile wall beside him.

“Shut the hell up T… I was just congratulating him.” Rolling his eyes and scoffing like an irate female, he turned and ambled back toward his locker space.

“Annoying as fuck sometimes, I swear.” Taylor mumbled. Choosing not to stick around much longer for anymore annoyance from these niggas, I stalked toward the showers and stepped into the furthest from eyesight. I turned the water to a lukewarm, soothing temperature and after stripping to nothing but skin and body ink, I stepped under the spout and shut my eyes, enjoying the feeling of the water as it drained over the top of my freshly faded head. I timed the shower so that when I did finally get out and make my way back to the locker area, it would be completely empty. I was nowhere close to a frame of mind that would allow me to be near anyone else, especially the annoying niggas that I called my teammates. Luckily for me, majority of them had already fled the locker room and the coliseum in its entirety, probably in hot pursuit of after parties and alcohol. With a few stragglers left, I chose to ignore each of them as I marched with the full intent of getting dressed and retrieving my belongings, so I could get the hell away from the building. Not even bothering to check to make sure I’d grabbed all my things, I headed for the door and out into the empty hall. I was glad the stands had finally been cleared… glad that all the screaming fans and students were out of earshot… glad all the thirsty temptation had dispersed without attempting to stick around to make my life even more of a living hell. And I was glad that the only thing I could spot as I headed out into the empty gym was the all too familiar shape of my personal savior. She gazed at Destani and listened intently to whatever she was saying. Though her face was purely relaxed, and beautiful at that, there was an unsettled gleam in her eyes that I couldn’t overlook. She looked like she was listening to everything Destani was saying, but not actually hearing her. Sighing and licking my lips, I tore my gaze away from her. I knew exactly what had her so detached from whatever Destani’s conversation was about and I felt awful for living with the knowledge that it was I who was troubling her. Following the outline of the spacious court, I walked closer to them and kept my head low. I could tell she’d already spotted me long ago, but I refused to face her because now the guilt was starting to set in.

“Damn nigga, I was starting to think your ass passed out somewhere in there and I was ‘bout to have to come save you.” Taylor chuckled. I completely ignored him and the way he stood there, cuddled up against Destani. It reminded me entirely too much of what I used to have and so desperately wanted to get back with Hope, and I really couldn’t stand to seem them rub it right in my face. Inching closer to them, I finally stopped a few feet away and glanced up only to find Hope staring right at me, brows bent sorrowfully. Taylor was now occupied with his phone and Destani glared at me as if I’d just stepped on her pet mouse.

“You okay?” The soft, melodic tone of her voice caught my attention and I looked down at her as she slowly approached me. She stretched her small soft hands up to cup my face and she gently stroked my cheeks, forcing me to briefly shut my eyes and enjoy her touch. I couldn’t for the life of me understand her ability to soothe whatever this monster was that dwelled in me. Of course I was now more grateful than ever to have her in my life… but now I was starting to obsess over what it meant and how much I knew I really didn’t deserve her. I nodded my response and stared down at her. She looked like a concerned mother and I held back a smirk as her expression lingered. I wanted to assure her that there was no reason for her to be concerned, but I’d be lying to her if I did.

“You played really good tonight.” She mumbled. She suddenly leaned closer to me, balancing herself against my chest, and hesitantly rolled onto the tips of her toes. She paused for only a moment before finally pressing her incredibly soft lips against my own. I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d kissed her, let alone been this physically close to her, and I was slightly shocked by the abrupt intimacy. She stayed there for a few seconds, waiting for me to respond to her kiss, but of course all my awkward ass did was stand there, stunned as if this was my very first kiss. Slowly pulling away, she sighed and frowned, staring straight at my chest with frustration all over her face.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, closing my eyes and pressing my lips against the top of her head “Thank you.” “So Sy, we going to this party now or what?” An evidently irritated Destani asked, not even trying to hide her distaste for me. She was still mad at me for what I'd done to Hope weeks ago and it was clear that it would take some time for her to move past the incident and forgive me. I honestly couldn’t even blame her for the way she felt. It was just hard to face her, knowing that she was never gonna let me live down my mistake. “Um, I think we’re gonna pass on this one Dez,” She mumbled, breaking our intense eye contact and turning briefly to face Destani, “You and Taylor can go ahead and I’ll just meet up with you later.”

Destani eyed her carefully, raising a skeptical brow as if allowing Hope to venture off somewhere with me was the absolute worst idea. With a nod of reassurance, Hope turned and focused her gaze on me, grabbing a limp hand from my side. I still wasn’t quite used to the feel of her touch and I flinched, but all she did was smile, already accustomed to my unnecessary edginess.

I had no idea where she planned to go if she wasn’t going to any of the after parties with Destani. I didn’t even know if she had a set destination in mind, but she seemed content enough to go sit on a bench somewhere, instead of wasting her time at an overcrowded, funky party. I couldn’t complain though. I was extremely content being in her presence, even though our time spent with each other now-a-days measured nowhere near what it’d once been.

TBC...

#chrisbrown #chrisbrownff #chrisbrownfanfic #jasminesanders #chrisbrownfanfiction #jasminesandersff #teambreezy #teambreezyff #fanfiction #fanfic

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poppymadness · 7 years ago

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💖 HQ, Knb, All Out, Free, BNHAand DnA I think you watched at least a little bit of it, didn't u? And since I know who some of your favorites are already u can just rant about why u love them

@naturalpeaches said:💖 can i be an ass and say twdg even tho ik the answers p much OH the last kingdom. bring it to ur blog amber. talk about it. accept it.

💖 listen those 2 weren’t enough. give me the raven cycle. give me the foxhole court. give me six of crows. giVE ME CRIMINAL MINDS HAAAAA BITCH. why not throw the 100 in there too. also talk abt ur boo in the sun is also a star. give him some lovin

💖 N A R U T O

hope it’s cool just to throw ya both in here bc i’m lazy

haikyuu: (3) kuroo tetsurou - iiiiiiiiiiii fucking love kuroo sO much, a huge tall not so dumb dumbass god. i don’t know what to say dfkhka i fuckin Love him thanks dude. i nEVER FORGET THE FUCKIN LAUGH GOD FUCK FOR FUCKS SAKE skjfd. whenever i get in Kuroo Moods they last SO long i can’t get a break. and gamer au kuroo is killer it’s too good. listen he’S A BIG FOOL and i LOVE him want the best for him bc he’s great, good, good dude. i also rlly fuckin love terushima man ooooo my god, imagine him and kuroo bein buds hORRIBLE

kuroko no basket: (1) kiyoshi teppei - mY BOY KIYOSHI AAAAA. hE’S EVEN T A L L E R mmmm 6′4″ the fuck mann. we know my love for this dumbass i love him so so muuch fuck. thought it was kuroko at first, bitch no. I LITERALLY DIDN’T KNOW I LOVED HIM TILL AFTER I FINISHED THE WHOLE SHOW. like, just, the more i saw stuff involving him the more i was like ooo no no waiT i LoVE HiM i screamed when he showed up in the second opening when we rewatched it oooommggggg. he’S SO GOOD I HOPE HIS KNEE IS HEALED I HOPE HE GETS TO PLAY BASKETBALL AS A LIL SIDE HOBBY OR SOMETHIN HOPE HE’S FUCKIN HAPPY!!!!! whY DOES HE SELF-SACRIFICE SO MUCH BOY OOO MY GOD WHEN HE REALIZED THE TEAM GOT HIS BACK TOO BITCH HE SO CUTE. mmmmm i love hiiiiim bois. also love akashi i keep finding it funny ur intimated by him cj

all out: (4) ebumi masaru - i can’t. i can’t explain why i love him oR WHY HE’S SO HIGH A FAVE GOD. this whole fandom is like Those Thighs and make ebumi all about fuckin sex like what a Tough Boy like yA HE BUYS (rents? whatever) PORN THAT’S FUCKIN SO FUNNY TO ME BUT MMMM he. more. i nevER STOP THINKIN BOUT THE EP WITH ISE THAT EMO SHIT DO U SEE HOW MUCH EBUMI CARES BOUT HIS FRIEND GOD Fuck. like yeah, just take the money. this is what was left for me but idc here take it u need it i stg season 2 better be in the works i want more of his backSTORY. oh hE FUCKIN BLEACHES HIS HAIR WHAT A PUUUUNK, HE TRAINS SO HARD HE CARES SO MUCH ABOUT RUGBY GETS P I S S E D WHEN PPL HALF-ASS IT LIKE?? FAIR ENOUGH. OH THETY ACTUALLY DREW HIS HAIR DOWN RIGHT ADJHF A OoO FUCK TAHT. i’m good it’s cool alright bye gion, raita & ise are my best friends thank

free: rin matsuoka - i. thought it was nagisa at first. i wanna cry fuckin nagisa jesus. good boy but hell no. rin?? is so sweet i’m sorry fuckin flew haru to australia & shit he’s so good i love him. i gotta do this i’m srry FUCK whoever thinks rin would be abusive with haru thx. i havE A RIN POSTER G O D

boku no hero academia: todoroki shouto - i literally didn’t have a fave in this show until one (1) specific episode in season 2 with him. thought i was gonna live forever not having a fave in this show. i had actually been growing to like him and was like No, i told myself to not like him bc he’s so popular hdkfa. and then that ep came and i was like,,,oof i Love him, love love love what a goOD BOY. he’s…so cute..comin to terms with his powers still can’t get over he interned with his dad he just…..wants to improve…is improving…..so good.

daiya no ace: ? - ok, i never developed a fave while watching it, at least not where i got to. i don’t even remember where i stopped oof that’s bad. but i had thought at that time that i rlly loved chris?? eijun is precious, i fuckin love him. miyuki is great i love him too. also really loved kuramochi?? so if i had continued i think it would’ve been one of em.

the walking dead game: kenny, luke, clem, gabe - pls don’t make me choose… kenny…tried his hardest to be good, worked his ass off till the last moment to improve himself and didn’t get the redemption he deserved. that man is good, he was just pushed to his max and couldn’t get back down. luke, luke is a sunshine boy who was too good for the world, a positive outlet could make anyone happy, did his best, didn’t deserve to die. cleM MY BADASS B A B Y HAS GROWN SO MUCH I LOOOOVE HER AND CAN’T WAIT FOR HER HAPPY ENDING TELLTALE YOU FUCKS I AM BEGGING YOU1!! gabe…annoyed me at first…stole my heart….just a boy thrown into the apocalypse tryin to be happy…he’s doing his best, he’s learning, truly not such a brat as assholes make him out to be. nick my boy i’m so sorry i would’ve included you ur so close

the last kingdom: uhtred & alfred - i love uhtred the godless and king alfred of wessex very much indeed. uhtred is just a wreck honestly, this danish bro got a lot goin on he just wants the land he deserves i just say he’s bein greedy, go be happy under alfred’s rule i still love u tho uhtred u dumbass. alfred! got the peace he wanted! i love alfred so much he wants to be a king without war unless he’s not given the choice, cares about his family so much, afraid he’ll be punished for the crown that’s not rightfully his own. alfred is so good, i love this man.

the raven cycle: (5) adam parrish - mmmmmmm what a good boy. an important boy, a very much loved boy. iiiii hate havin his pov sometimes, some relatable things in there, i love him so much. he’s not. his father. thanks. gotta say that a lot wanT HIM TO KNOOOOOOOW. he’s so good he’s improving himself he’s doin it!! go adam!! goD ASHLETY I KEEP THINKING OF THINGS YOU HAVEN’T GOTTEN TOOOOOOOO. mmmm it’s ok to still be stuck and to have bad days he doesn’t have to get over it right away!! it’s not somethin that’ll just be over!! dhfad smALL STEPS my boy i love u…. all bc, he…legally free (tryin not to spoil dfhjdaf).. don’t mean he has to be over it…take ur time adam. i’m thinkin of the emo thing in trk fuck wrong devil dkhfad. i just wanna cry he’s so good worth so much ronan & i will fight any and all fucks who wanna Go. i!! love him!! he deserVES TO FEEL LOVED AND TO FEEL HOW TO LOVE MMMM COOL i’m gonna stop i’ll just repeat myself - i just thOUGHT OF THE ‘FUCK YOU GANSEY’ WOW FIRST BOOK FUCK B YE

the foxhole court: …andrew minyard… - idk man?? it’s so lowkey?? it’s chill i literally don’t even have anything to say. nicky, neil & dan are my squad love em.

six of crows: jesper fahey - idk what fuckin bitch ass mood i had to be in when i read soc but if i wasn’t in it jesper would totally have been my fave. i wouldn’t take him away from wylan anyways (statement kiiinda counts for the two aforementioned also whoop). jesper?? deserves the world, but so does everyone else they all deserve the world even u bitch ass brekker who would not deal with my bullshit ever.

criminal minds: aaron hotchner - god ashley screw off askin me for cm. love hotch, would die for him, too good of a guy.

the 100: bellamy blake - is a fuckin whore. iiiiiii love bellamy so much. bitch ass goes from a punk i hated to a good dude to a punk ass influenced by some huge ass prick dick and then struggles with himself for the next season and will now hopefully feel a bit better at least for gods sake. all bc you’ve done bad things doesn’t mean ur bad bell… i still never get over fucking pike taking advantage of him when he was vulnerable fuck off i just want him to feel better!! take responsibility but don’t let it push you down fucking get up!! you’ll get up!! mmm he’s so good he just wants to make everything right but clarke makes everyTHING FUCKIN GO WRONG. i just…not everything is excusable but he can make up for it he will and he’s worth it,,,, people gotta forgive him at some point he’s trying his hardest to make up for everything and he keeps beating himself on it mmmmdfahdf i love him

the sun is also a star: daniel jae ho bae - idk what to say about him ashley god fuck. he’s so cute though?? what a cheesy dude. ugh literally so cute i gotta reread it

naruto: kiba inuzuka - what a prideful ass i fuckIN LOVe him thx. i mean i was fuckin doomed from that start he has best boy akamaru & fuckin has a jutsu where he turns into a wolf?? and his fuckin mom and sister have wolves?? doomed before i even fuckin knew it. he’s soooo cute, never take his fuckin hoodie off idk what’s cuter him trying to look tough in that hoodie that everyone literally thought was hair or havin the hoodie off and showin his actual hair that somehow makes him cuter,,, what’S HORRIBLE IS THE LEATHER JACKET OR WHATEVER IT IS HE WEARS IN SHIPPUDEN fuckin idiot. imagine him as hokage i can’t believe he wants to be hokage it’s so funny i’m sorry kiba i’ll support u just give me a minute to catch my breath. guys he’s just so cute, trains so hard, he’s so good i love him enthusiastic boy

#this is so long i'm srry #i didn't even rant in all of them either #also like #clarification not prob needed but numbers- where the top five r in the top five #i didn't rant enough about kuroo even tho i'm in a kuroo mood now lOL #idk what to say about him?? i just love him so deeply #and so many things are more headcanon-y #so idk

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imgilmoregirl · 7 years ago

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AO3 Link

Notes: This chapter got the best of me. Seriously. I think I've re-written it like three times until I got this final version which is the one I've liked the most, but this is a chapter to give you all some hope.

Against All Odds

The closed sign had been pulled on for hours when the bell in front of the shop jingled. Robert Gold had been distracted, restoring an old chair while Sarah took a nap on the cot. He had picked her up from school earlier and brought her to the shop while Belle was on her appointment with Archie, but she had to take the medicines and it made her feel sleepy, she struggled to keep her eyes open for a while but ended-up falling asleep in his arms. After he pulled Sarah down on the cot, Gold spent quite a long time, just watching her sleep, contemplating the change of scenario in that shop, because just a few months ago he would have found himself in there, finishing a bottle of scotch and trying to decide if he should risk himself to go home or just spend the night right where he was, but now he had Sarah back to look after and he would never be tempted to drink to oblivion again.

A tiny smile filled his lips, as Gold thought that despite the circumstances, he was happier than he ever thought he would get the chance of being again, but the sound of the bell, of course couldn't bring any good news. He pulled his paintbrush down and grabbed his cane, standing up from his corner at the floor and making his way to the front of the shop, where he found Regina Mills carefully dusting a finger through his counter.

"What do you want?" He asked behind clenched teeth, not even caring for greetings and amenities.

Regina had once been somewhat a friend of his. She was already the mayor when he arrived town and was the very first person he met once he made it to Storybrooke, she was a nice and very professional person, offered him her condolences over his father's death and helped Gold with the documents he needed to make all of Malcolm's properties legally his. From that moment and on they mainly saw each other during the monthly town meetings, but she attended his and Belle's wedding, was present in most of their children's birthday parties and they always looked for each other when business asked to. Things changed, however, when she arrived his shop on a cloudy day, crying and begging him to help her find her husband's murderer. For the good of the town, he agreed, but then, surely, he retreated it. After the accident he avoided Regina in all ways he could, he didn't go to town's meetings anymore, he didn't take a list of the people who moved out of his properties and he didn't answer her calls.

Gold knew it wasn't really her fault, because she hadn't been the one to sabotage his car, but still, there was a small part of him, that blamed her. She looked back at him with angry eyes, folding her arms and taking a step ahead.

"You're avoiding detective Rogers," the mayor accused.

"Oh, the cry-baby came to you?" Gold mocked. "I've told him to stay the hell away from me."

She shook her head angrily at him. Ever since Robin died, Regina's life mission had become to find his murderer, people barely saw her out doing stuff with her children like she once used to, but that man was dead for a year now and she should recognise when to stop.

"Why are doing this?" She asked harshly. "He is going to put the man who killed your son in prison, you should've been feeling thankful. All he needs is some information you haven't written on the files."

"Regina, about nine months ago when you came here and asked me for help, I did everything I could to find evidences and discover what exactly happened to your husband in that night. The thing is, I was an idiot back then," Gold answered, looking right at her eyes. "I lost everything, because of you."

The dark-haired woman gasped, eyes narrowing in what every single people in town would have taken as a threatening look, but not him. If Regina was feared, then so was Gold and even though he was soft and good inside, he knew very well how to play the part of the cruellest man he could.

"So, your problems are my fault now?"

"Yes, they are," Robert stated. "You brought me to the killer's aim, now Bae is dead and Sarah might still die!"

"This is ridiculous," Regina replied. "I don't know why I came here in first place, you've gone mad."

Turning around on the balls of her feet, the mayor crossed the shop and slammed the door behind herself when she left, but she could do all the drama she wanted now and Gold wouldn't give a damn about it. He was angry too, more at himself than at her, but he needed someone to discharge those guilty feelings that were burning him inside or he would be back to wanting to die.

"Papa?" Called the soft voice behind him.

Gold looked back to see that Sarah was standing near the curtains, rubbing her eyes with fists as she yawned. He smiled fondly at her, thinking that he would never tire being amused at how much she looked like his Belle and how he could have helped making something so beautiful as her. Gesticulating for her to go back to the back of the shop, Gold walked towards her, following little Sarah to the cot, taking a seat and allow her to climb up onto his lap.

"Sweetheart, I didn't know you were awake. Are you alright?"

"I was dreaming about Bae," Sarah told him. "He said that something good is going to happen."

As impossible as these dreams might sound, Gold was glad Sarah still had this connection with Bae, because at least she wasn't grieving so terribly as he was Belle were. Robert kissed her forehead, stroking gently the curls that framed her face.

"I hope he is right."

"Papa," Sarah started, very hesitantly, "do you think mama is going to be fine again?"

A confused expression crossed his face. He knew Belle was still struggling with anxiety, but she always seemed to pretend to be alright when she was near Sarah, so unless it had changed since the last time they really spoke to each other - in which she dumped him after they just had sex - then he didn't know why his darling daughter appeared to be so concerned.

"What do you mean, my love?"

"She is sick too, but in the mind. Aunt Ruby said she is crying and she is seeing Doctor Hopper because her mind is messy and hurt," Sarah explained. "I didn't know you could get sick of the mind."

"And the heart too," Robert completed. "But your mama is a strong woman, she will get over it."

Oh, Ruby, of course! She had quite a big tongue that she couldn't keep inside her mouth. You don't try to explain mental disorders to children, everybody knew it. Telling Sarah that her mother was ill would only get her preoccupied and do no good.

"She is not getting any better," Sarah sniffled, tracing his tie with a finger. "She is crying more and eating less."

"You're too attentive for someone of your age," Gold whispered, tapping a finger to the tip of her nose. "Don't worry about it, ok?"

"Ok."

Even though she had agreed, Gold could see in Sarah's eyes that she was not quitting worrying about her mother and it made him feel worried too. With many layers of clothes and make-up Belle could look normal to most people, but he had seen her naked and exposed and knew she was getting too slim. He wanted to help her more than anything, but she needed space and he was trying to understand it. However, sometimes he knew doing right for someone was also showing them support and not letting them get totally lonely.

"What do you say about us getting some lasagne from Granny's to her?"

Sarah's eyes shinned as she nodded.

"Great!"

Smiling Gold took her off his lap, placing Sarah on the floor and offering his hand to her. She grabbed her bag and they went straight to the diner.

"You're scared," Archibald Hopper affirmed, that afternoon, after almost an hour of poor rantings from Isabelle Gold.

On her very first appointment, she had cried more than she had talked, but lately Belle was feeling a bigger appeal to complain about life than she did weeping in front of her therapist. She didn't have anyone to talk, although Ruby and Alice were good friend that were trying their best to help, because she didn't want to be that annoying person who only talks about herself. Her father had always been willing to listen to her, but they haven't spoken to each other ever since that unfortunate episode in the library, so she was feeling really lonely and the fact that she had pushed Robert away didn't help with anything.

"Yeah, I've just told you so. The test's result shall come soon and there is a huge possibility that Alice's baby is not compatible to Sarah."

"That's not what I'm talking about, you're scared of life in general."

"Doctor Hopper..." Belle trailed off with a sigh.

The bad thing about therapy was that Archie always told her the truth and, sometimes, she wasn't ready for it, but at least the things he said, her anxiety could take. She had a bad time after speaking to people like Regina and Hades, but Doctor Hopper could irritate her as much as he'd like and she wouldn't feel her body reacting badly to it, which was good because it meant there was a part of her brain which understood that therapy was a good thing for her. However, it didn't make it any easier for Belle to hear when he was being sincere like now.

"You said you wanted to try again with Gold, then you suddenly stepped back and now your anxiety symptoms are exploding," Archie pointed out.

"It's just the nausea mostly and sometimes, the heartbeat."

The last couple of days were a whole new hell for Belle. She would sleep with her heart beating so damn fast that sometimes she thought it might explode inside her chest and she woke up rushing to the toilet to empty her stomach, not to say how tired and sleepy she was feeling lately. Belle had never felt so ill in her entire life. Before the accident she rarely got sick, but now her body was betraying her and the more ill she felt, the less she ate, which she knew that couldn't be a good thing.

"Alright," Archie started after writing something in his notebook, "I want you to make a list for me. Write what happened before you felt sick, each time you do and then we can analyse the problem."

"The heartbeat increases whenever Sarah coughs or I have to see Gold, but the nausea is usually during the morning," Belle told him.

"Dreams can affect the anxiety too. Did you have any nightmares recently?"

"I don't think so."

"Ok, I think that's all for today then," the therapist smiled at her. "Make the list and don't forget to face the chair."

Rolling her eyes, Belle grabbed her purse and made her way to the door, leaving the building as quickly as she could, because she was tired of trying to face chairs. It never worked and only made her more anxious. Belle would rather hide in her apartment and not think about her problems at all than attempting to do anything about them when she knew that they could hardly be solved. She was about to make her way to Gold’s shop to pick up her daughter when a hand on her wrist stopped her and Belle froze in place, startled by a brief moment before she looked to see it was Ruby.

"How was the therapy?"

"Are you my shadow now?"

"No,” the other girl affirmed, pushing a cup into her hand, “but I brought you cocoa."

Shaking her head, she refused. Anything with the slightest taste of chocolate was exactly what she felt the desire to have right now, but Belle knew that if she drank the cocoa it would only last a few hours in her stomach at best perspective and given the fact she had a whole night with Sarah, she couldn’t allow herself to try even a sip of it.

"No, thanks."

"Seriously?" Ruby inquired outraged. "I've prepared it myself."

"I’m sorry, Rubes, my anxiety has stricken me down this week. My stomach is rejecting everything."

"Belle, honey, I didn't want to be the one telling you this, but you're so slim that you seem to be ill. You need to eat."

"I'm - " she started about to object it.

The sentence, however wasn’t finished, because Belle’s vision got blurry and she had to get a hold of Ruby’s arm not to fall. Her knees were bucking and the cup fell from her trembling hands, hitting the ground and spilling hot chocolate on the street. Belle’s breath became difficult and she felt a sharp pain on her abdomen, coming right from her surgery scar. She needed a moment to compose herself again before she glanced back at her friend with a nervous sigh.

"Whoa, what was that?"

"I guess you might be right," Belle murmured, still feeling a bit of. "I'm living on tea. I haven't eaten anything today."

"Alright,” Ruby said in a decisive tone. “You're going to the hospital tomorrow, whether you want it or not, you'll make a full check-up and ask for the doctor to indicate what you can eat and what you cannot, then you’ll start a whole new heathy diet."

"Ruby..."

"We are not arguing, Isabelle, I'll take you there by myself."

Of course, she was just about to reject the idea completely because Belle hated the hospital more than she hated anything – well expect Hades – and she wasn’t willing to go over there and submit herself to a whole check-up. Plus, she was pretty sure it all was due to her anxiety so there was nothing the doctors could actually do for her. She didn’t have time to tell any of it to Ruby though, because in that moment Sarah crossed the street running towards them and collapsing against her legs, almost making Belle lose her balance.

"Mama!"

"Hey, sweetheart."

"Belle, are you alright?” Asked Gold who was coming right way with something in his hands. “You look pale."

"I'm fine," she guaranteed.

For six weeks they only had a few quick conversations like this one whenever he came to pick Sarah and Belle was really angry at herself for being the one to have caused this awkwardness between them again. He had been so gentle with her in that night, so loving that she still couldn’t believe she ruined it all.

"I bought some lasagne for you."

"Oh, thank you," Belle said, accepting the package from Granny’s that he was offering her.

Granny’s hamburgers used to be for date nights, lasagne for lazy moments at home in which they would watch movies with the children before sending them to bed and making passionate love on the couch. She smiled bitterly at the warm tray of food in her hands, feeling her stomach clench at the wonderful smell of it, complaining about its emptiness.

"Mama, can papa eat with us?"

"That's a wonderful idea, little Sarah," Ruby exclaimed even before Belle could managed to understand what her daughter just said. "Go on."

She wasn’t going to be the one to say ‘no’ at this point and a part of her hoped Gold would accept the inviting and hey could maybe have a real talk and end this weird tension between them – maybe in the same pleasurable way they ended it the last time – but when he shook his head, her hopes died.

"Actually, I’ll need to decline. I have a few things to do," Gold said, excusing himself as he pointed back at his shop. "But I hope you two enjoy the meal."

Belle tried to smile to show him that she didn’t care, however the expression in her face was so sad that she wouldn’t have managed to trick anyone, not even herself.

Five years ago.

Giving birth, Belle decided, was the most bittersweet thing in life. She had been in labour for fourteen hours to bring a daughter to this world, begging for the epidural when she couldn't take it no longer. Robert stood by her side all the time, whispering words of encouragement as she pushed and panted, but then when the squealing baby was pulled down on her arms all the pain seemed to be worth it. Everyone in the family was very happy to receive Sarah, including the ever-grumpy Moe French who even showed up at the hospital after the baby was born to bring flowers and balloons.

Her pregnancy had been the best she could expect: no symptoms at all, no water retention, just backpain and swollen feet, which everybody could take for a while. Belle was overjoyed to now have a baby entirely hers, but she constantly stopped everything she was doing to simply give Baden some attention, because after he was her son too and she loved him to the moon and back. She didn't want him to feel pulled aside, so even if she was super tired and sore, she would sit, read for him, help him with homework or just play some video-games. Belle had found out from the moment she met Bae and held him in her arms that she wanted to be a good mother and she would do anything in her reach to give those children the good life they deserved.

Sarah's first two months were basically spent at home. They had a lot of visitors coming and going, wanting to see the new baby and bringing her presents, but after a while Belle grew tired of being at home. She knew she should be enjoying her maternity leave to rest as much as she could, but Belle missed being out and about, so after insisting a lot, Gold allowed her to take Bae to school by herself as long as she promised to always take the stroller with her and not let everybody in town bounce around their baby like fools.

She had been happy to agree with these terms and, in her first day out, she dropped her son at school and decided to take a walk on the park on her way back home. It was a beautiful sunny day and she wore one of her favourite outfits, red skirt and blue shirt, enjoying the natural warmth that bathed her skin as she pushed the pink stroller through the park. Belle was almost too lost in thoughts to notice anyone, but the man sat on the bench was sighing loudly as he stared at a tree and it caught up her attention.

"Robin, hi!"

"Oh, hello, Belle," the man said, forcing a smile to fill his lips. "I've heard you had your baby, is that her?"

"Yes," she smiled, sitting by his side and picking the tiny sleeping child up from inside the stroller to nestle her against her chest. "Meet Sarah Grace Gold."

"She is lovely," Robin praised.

This park, his safe haven, was one of her favourite places, there was a space for the children and she loved to bring Bae there to let him play and be free. From the moment she became his mother, she wanted to give him the world and Belle had a conviction that allowing your children to feel free was a big step into making them independent, fearless and clever. She could tell Bae was all of those things and it made her very proud. Belle truly hoped she would get to raise Sarah to be like that too, so she would always choose her own paths and never let anybody decide her fate.

It was a good thought, even more hopeful now that she was holding this small baby in her arms, but when she looked back at Robin she saw that he looked ponderously again.

"Are you alright?" Belle questioned. "You seem a little bit off."

Robin straightened himself on the bench, moving his shoulders uncomfortably as he glanced down at her. She wasn't much acquainted of his wife, but he was a nice person and whenever she was at the park with Bae, he would bring his oldest son, Henry to play with him while the two of them discussed the weather and the changes in Granny's menu.

"Have you ever done something and then regretted it five minutes later?"

"Many times," she admitted, before asking as empathically as she could: "Have you done something like that?"

"Yeah," he nodded, pinching the bridge of his nose as he snorted. "I thought I was doing the right thing, but now I'm not so sure and I think I have angered the wrong people."

A slight frown appeared in her face as Belle caressed her daughter's pink cheek with the pad of her thumb. The way Robin was talking with this horribly hopeless tone of voice made something inside her feel cold and fearful as if it was the beginning of something big and definitely bad.

"Maybe you could ask for forgiveness?"

"There is none of this for me, friend," Robing sighed. "I can't tell anybody about that, not even my wife. She would hate me."

"Is it so bad?" Belle inquired.

Robin nodded, clasping his hands on his lap as he went back at staring at the trees. He appeared to see something past them, his eyes distant and his breath short. She had never seen him in such distress.

"How much does you value the life of your child?" The man questioned, looking back at her. "Of both your children?"

"They are everything to me," Belle said, stupefied, clutching baby Sarah close.

"That is it," Robin pointed out before standing up. "Have a good day."

With that he disappeared in the woods, leaving Belle alone to wonder what was really happening to him and if it was as bad as he made it seem to be.

Present days.

Belle spent the whole morning in the hospital. She wasn’t willing to go over there, but Ruby appeared at the library when she was just about to leave and take Sarah to school and insisted she needed to be checked, so after they dropped her girl there for the day, the two friends headed to the hospital and Belle allowed Whale to take some blood from her and do some other few exams. He was all cheerful and hopeful, saying the compatibility test’s result would arrive that afternoon, but it only made her more anxious, which wasn’t good.

She was expecting good news of course, but Belle wasn’t a fool, she knew that the result would mostly likely be negative. Whale told her to not keep thinking much about it and that he would call her by the end of the day to tell if something was wrong with her or not. Truth be told, she didn’t give a damn about herself at that point, she just wanted Sarah to be fine.

Ruby took Belle to Granny’s after that and prepared a nice lunch for her. She wasn’t really hungry, nor wanted to risk eating and feeling sick again, but her friend was being so kind – in her own irritating way – that she ended-up eating a bit before going to work. Belle didn’t think anybody would bother for the library not being opened in its usual time, so for a moment she was surprised to see a man waiting outside, until she realised who it was.

"Hey, Belle!"

"Jefferson, hi,” she greeted him. “How is Alice going?"

Taking the keys out of her purse, she opened the front door making it invitingly to whoever might wish to get a book, not that much people did, as Storybrooke had a poor number of readers, but she was always there to help whoever seek some acknowledge or wanted to travel very far away without leaving the comfort of its own home.

"Fine, she actually asked me to come over and ask if you already have the test results," Jefferson told her. "She really wants to help."

"You two are good friends," Belle smiled. "I just spoke to Whale, he said he shall have the papers this afternoon, then I'll let you know."

"That's nice," he nodded, noticing that her gaze was fixed on the floor. "Hey, if you ever need to talk, I'm here."

"Thanks, Jeff. See you around."

"See you around, bookworm."

A smile crossed her lips at the old nickname he had for her, but Belle didn’t allow herself to stick to old memories of a time in which she was truly happy, she only entered the library and started to work. That day thankfully wasn’t a cleaning day, so she wouldn’t have to see Will, which made things easier for her in addition to the fact no much people appeared and the very few teenagers that were there, made no much noise as they studied on the tables in the back room.

She wasn’t expecting to receive a world from Whale anytime soon, so she started to choose books for the afternoon with the children when her phone started to buzz on her purse. Belle reached for it, furrowing when she saw the hospital number shinning in the screen, but she picked up anxiously anyway.

"Doctor Whale, hi, I was really eager expecting your call."

"Mrs. Gold good and bad news," he answered in an impassive voice.

"Give me a moment, I need to sit," Belle said breathing in and reaching for her chair with heart pounding furiously in her chest. "Alright, I think I'm ready."

"Unfortunately, the Madden's baby is not compatible to Sarah," Whale started, carefully. "But against all odds, I've found another donor."

Her heart attempted to stop. The Madden’s child suddenly didn’t matter anymore because they had a donor, a compatible one. Her daughter was going to be safe and sound again, she would be cured. Tears started to stream down her face as Belle covered her mouth with a hand in wonder, the happiness she was feeling with this news something she hadn’t felt in a long time.

"You did?"

"Yes," Whale confirmed. "Mrs. Gold, I'm holding the results of the exams you did today. You're pregnant."

#rumbelle #rumbelle fic #mine #writing #rumplestiltskin #belle french #belle gold #baelfire #neal cassidy #ao3 #fanfic

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