#can't people just not be awful to other people?

[kla1991]

Trump et. al. think some people matter more than others and most people are disposable chumps and stupid monsters.

Do you really want to stand here and agree with them on that?

Young people have GOT to stop talking about conservatives like they're scary menacing monsters. Yes the policies they back are horrifically destructive but that's entirely because of how individually stupid, fearful, emotionally stunted, weak willed and catastrophically gullible they are. That all is what made them become right wing to begin with. Just the most easily manipulated zombie sheep on earth.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Proud to be a blockhead

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/12/21/blockheads-r-us/#vocational-awe

This is my last Pluralistic post of the year, and rather than round up my most successful posts of the year, I figured I'd write a little about why it's impossible for me to do that, and why that is by design, and what that says about the arts, monopolies, and creative labor markets.

I started Pluralistic nearly five years ago, and from the outset, I was adamant that I wouldn't measure my success through quantitative measures. The canonical version of Pluralistic – the one that lives at pluralistic.net – has no metrics, no analytics, no logs, and no tracking. I don't know who visits the site. I don't know how many people visit the site. I don't know which posts are most popular, and which ones are the least popular. I can't know any of that.

The other versions of Pluralistic are less ascetic, but only because there's no way for me to turn off some metrics on those channels. The Mailman service that delivers the (tracker-free) email version of Pluralistic necessarily has a system for telling me how many subscribers I have, but I have never looked at that number, and have no intention of doing so. I have turned off notifications when someone signs up for the list, or resigns from it.

The commercial, surveillance-heavy channels for Pluralistic – Tumblr, Twitter – have a lot of metrics, but again, I don't consult them. Medium and Mastodon have some metrics, and again, I just pretend they don't exist.

What do I pay attention to? The qualitative impacts of my writing. Comments. Replies. Emails. Other bloggers who discuss it, or discussions on Metafilter, Slashdot, Reddit and Hacker News. That stuff matters to me a lot because I write for two reasons, which are, in order: to work out my own thinking, and; to influence other peoples' thinking.

Writing is a cognitive prosthesis for me. Working things out on the page helps me work things out in my life. And, of course, working things out on the page helps me work more things out on the page. Writing begets writing:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/05/09/the-memex-method/

Honestly, that is sufficient. Not in the sense that writing, without being read, would make me happy or fulfilled. Being read and being part of a community and a conversation matters a lot to me. But the very act of writing is so important to me that even if no one read me, I would still write.

This is a thing that writers aren't supposed to admit. As I wrote on this blog's fourth anniversary, the most laughably false statement about writing ever uttered is Samuel Johnson's notorious "No man but a blockhead ever wrote but for money":

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/20/fore/#synthesis

Making art is not an "economically rational" activity. Neither is attempting to persuade other people to your point of view. These activities are not merely intrinsically satisfying, they are also necessary, at least for many of us. The long, stupid fight about copyright that started in the Napster era has rarely acknowledged this, nor has it grappled with the implications of it. On the one hand, you have copyright maximalists who say totally absurd things like, "If you don't pay for art, no one will make art, and art will disappear." This is one of those radioactively false statements whose falsity is so glaring that it can be seen from orbit.

But on the other hand, you know who knows this fact very well? The corporations that pay creative workers. Movie studios, record labels, publishers, games studios: they all know that they are in possession of a workforce that has to make art, and will continue to do so, paycheck or not, until someone pokes their eyes out or breaks their fingers. People make art because it matters to them, and this trait makes workers terribly exploitable. As Fobazi Ettarh writes in her seminal paper on "vocational awe," workers who care about their jobs are at a huge disadvantage in labor markets. Teachers, librarians, nurses, and yes, artists, are all motivated by a sense of mission that often trumps their own self-interest and well-being and their bosses know it:

https://www.inthelibrarywiththeleadpipe.org/2018/vocational-awe/

One of the most important ideas in David Graeber's magisterial book Bullshit Jobs is that the ground state of labor is to do a job that you are proud of and that matters to you, but late-stage capitalist alienation has gotten so grotesque that some people will actually sneer at the idea that, say, teachers should be well compensated: "Why should you get a living wage – isn't the satisfaction of helping children payment enough?"

https://memex.craphound.com/2018/06/20/david-graebers-bullshit-jobs-why-does-the-economy-sustain-jobs-that-no-one-values/

These are the most salient facts of the copyright fight: creativity is a non-economic activity, and this makes creative workers extremely vulnerable to exploitation. People make art because they have to. As Marx was finishing Kapital, he was often stuck working from home, having pawned his trousers so he could keep writing. The fact that artists don't respond rationally to economic incentives doesn't mean they should starve to death. Art – like nursing, teaching and librarianship – is necessary for human thriving.

No, the implication of the economic irrationality of vocational awe is this: the only tool that can secure economic justice for workers who truly can't help but do their jobs is solidarity. Creative workers need to be in solidarity with one another, and with our audiences – and, often, with the other workers at the corporations who bring our work to market. We are all class allies locked in struggle with the owners of both the entertainment companies and the technology companies that sit between us and our audiences (this is the thesis of Rebecca Giblin's and my 2022 book Chokepoint Capitalism):

https://chokepointcapitalism.com/

The idea of artistic solidarity is an old and important one. Victor Hugo, creator of the first copyright treaty – the Berne Convention – wrote movingly about how the point of securing rights for creators wasn't to allow their biological children to exploit their work after their death, but rather, to ensure that the creative successors of artists could build on their forebears' accomplishments. Hugo – like any other artist who has a shred of honesty and has thought about the subject for more than ten seconds – knew that he was part of a creative community and tradition, one composed of readers and writers and critics and publishing workers, and that this was a community and a tradition worth fighting for and protecting.

One of the most important and memorable interviews Rebecca and I did for our book was with Liz Pelly, one of the sharpest critics of Spotify (our chapter about how Spotify steals from musicians is the only part of the audiobook available on Spotify itself – a "Spotify Exclusive"!):

https://open.spotify.com/show/7oLW9ANweI01CVbZUyH4Xg

Pelly has just published a major, important new book about Spotify's ripoffs, called Mood Machine:

https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Mood-Machine/Liz-Pelly/9781668083505

A long article in Harper's unpacks one of the core mechanics at the heart of Spotify's systematic theft from creative workers: the use of "ghost artists," whose generic music is cheaper than real music, which is why Spotify crams it into their playlists:

https://harpers.org/archive/2025/01/the-ghosts-in-the-machine-liz-pelly-spotify-musicians/

The subject of Ghost Artists has long been shrouded in mystery and ardent – but highly selective – denials from Spotify itself. In her article – which features leaked internal chats from Spotify – Pelly gets to the heart of the matter. Ghost artists are musicians who are recruited by shadowy companies that offer flat fees for composing and performing inoffensive muzak that can fade into the background. This is wholesaled to Spotify, which crams it into wildly popular playlists of music that people put on while they're doing something else ("Deep Focus," "100% Lounge," "Bossa Nova Dinner," "Cocktail Jazz," "Deep Sleep," "Morning Stretch") and might therefore settle for an inferior product.

Spotify calls this "Perfect Fit Music" and it's the pink slime of music, an extruded, musiclike content that plugs a music-shaped hole in your life, without performing the communicative and aesthetic job that real music exists for.

After many dead-end leads with people involved in the musical pink slime industry, Pelly finally locates a musician who's willing to speak anonymously about his work (he asks for anonymity because he relies on the pittances he receives for making pink slime to survive). This jazz musician knows very little about where the music he's commissioned to produce ends up, which is by design. The musical pink slime industry, like all sleaze industries, is shrouded in the secrecy sought by bosses who know that they're running a racket they should be ashamed of.

The anonymous musician composes a stack of compositions on his couch, then goes into a studio for a series of one-take recordings. There's usually a rep from the PFC pink slime industry there, and the rep's feedback is always "play simpler." As the anonymous musician explains:

That’s definitely the thing: nothing that could be even remotely challenging or offensive, really. The goal, for sure, is to be as milquetoast as possible.

This source calls the arrangement "shameful." Another musician Pelly spoke to said "it felt unethical, like some kind of money-laundering scheme." The PFC companies say that these composers and performers are just making music, the way anyone might, and releasing it under pseudonyms in a way that "has been popular across mediums for decades." But Pelly's interview subjects told her that they don't consider their work to be art:

It feels like someone is giving you a prompt or a question, and you’re just answering it, whether it’s actually your conviction or not. Nobody I know would ever go into the studio and record music this way.

Artists who are recruited to make new pink slime are given reference links to existing pink slime and ordered to replicate it as closely as possible. The tracks produced this way that do the best are then fed to the next group of musicians to replicate, and so on. It's the musical equivalent of feeding slaughterhouse sweepings to the next generation of livestock, a version of the gag from Catch 22 where a patient in a body-cast has a catheter bag and an IV drip, and once a day a nurse comes and swaps them around.

Pelly reminds us that Spotify was supposed to be an answer to the painful question of the Napster era: how do we pay musicians for their labor? Spotify was sold as a way to bypass the "gatekeepers": the big three labels who own 70% of all recorded music, whose financial maltreatment of artists was seen as moral justification for file sharing ("Why buy the CD if the musician won't see any of the money from it?").

But the way that Spotify secured rights to all the popular music in the world was by handing over big equity stakes in its business to the Big Three labels, and giving them wildly preferential terms that made it impossible for independent musicians and labels to earn more than homeopathic fractions of a penny for each stream, even as Spotify became the one essential conduit for reaching an audience:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/03/16/wage-theft/#excessive-buyer-power

It turns out that getting fans to pay for music has no necessary connection to getting musicians paid. Vocational awe means that the fact that someone has induced a musician to make music doesn't mean that the musician is getting a fair share of what you pay for music. The same goes for every kind of art, and every field where vocational awe plays a role, from nursing to librarianship.

Chokepoint Capitalism tries very hard to grapple with this conundrum; the second half of the book is a series of detailed, shovel-ready policy prescriptions for labor, contract, and copyright reforms that will immediately and profoundly shift the share of income generated by creative labor from bosses to workers.

Which brings me back to this little publishing enterprise of mine, and the fact that I do it for free, and not only that, give it away under a Creative Commons Attribution license that allows you to share and republish it, for money, if you choose:

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

I am lucky enough that I make a good living from my writing, but I'm also honest enough with myself to know just how much luck was involved with that fact, and insecure enough to live in a state of constant near-terror about what happens when my luck runs out. I came up in science fiction, and I vividly remember the writers I admired whose careers popped like soap-bubbles when Reagan deregulated the retail sector, precipitating a collapse in the grocery stores and pharmacies where "midlist" mass-market paperbacks were sold by the millions across the country:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/07/04/self-publishing/

These writers – the ones who are still alive – are living proof of the fact that you have to break our fingers to get us to stop writing. Some of them haven't had a mainstream publisher in decades, but they're still writing, and self-publishing, or publishing with small presses, and often they're doing the best work of their careers, and almost no one is seeing it, and they're still doing it.

Because we aren't engaged in economically rational activity. We're doing something essential – essential to us, first and foremost, and essential to the audiences and peers our work reaches and changes and challenges.

Pluralistic is, in part, a way for me too face the fear I wake up with every day, that some day, my luck will run out, as it has for nearly all the writers I've ever admired, and to reassure myself that the writing will go on doing what I need it to do for my psyche and my heart even if – when – my career regresses to the mean.

It's a way for me to reaffirm the solidaristic nature of artistic activity, the connection with other writers and other readers (because I am, of course, an avid, constant reader). Commercial fortunes change. Monopolies lay waste to whole sectors and swallow up the livelihoods of people who believe in what they do like a whale straining tons of plankton through its baleen. But solidarity endures. Solidarietatis longa, vita brevis.

Happy New Year folks. See you in 2025.

[jmdbjk]

Jungkook telling it like it is...

He did tell Spotify that he'd use the blanket they gave him. Just not the way they probably thought he would: Jungkook's glossy black marble floor shows his bare feet prints on it and he used his Spotify blanket to clean the floor. He says he'll have to always wear socks or slippers. I can see him leaving a pile of toe socks at the door just for him to put on when he's in that room...

He says he briefly and unseriously considered quitting the business to be a full time cook. (JK, you can't do that, you have to make enough money to pay for the utilities and property taxes on your new fortress...) But that's his introvert kicking in, the routine, the comfort zone, the way his job holds his interest enough to make him want to keep doing it. But he is aware and he knows this about himself and knows he has to return to his "spot" as he called it.

He seems to accept the fact his place of residence is going to be known by the fans just like many other aspects of his life such as details of his military service. He seems to take it in stride but he also sets boundaries by asking fans to not come to his house and do not send packages, not only to his house but to his army base. He explains why, that he cannot accept them and that packages containing food are restricted. He clearly instructs to send letters to the company.

How do people know where he lives? Here's the answer, or at least part of it:

We all know if you spend time on Youtube the algorithm will feed you videos and channels similar to what you've watched. If you are restrained enough to limit your viewing to only BangtanTV I applaud you. But if you watch anything else, youtube will serve you similar. We all know that through the anecdotes of Armys talking about being flooded with edited, slo-mo shipping videos.

Personally, I like watching youtube channels that show walking tours of Seoul. The city captured my attention and I've learned so much about it. But because of this interest I have in Seoul and Korea, more "walking tour" and Korean travel type channels are suggested to me. Some are better than others. Some are actually run by K-Army. I am very interested in K-Armys' perspective about life in Seoul so I watch. We get to see the birthday cafe events and such that I'm probably never going to experience.

Inevitably one of these channels is going to walk by the members' homes... because they are Army and can. Streets are public. And this is how other people find out where the members live. The videos show that none of the homes are accessible. They are all behind walls and gates. None of the videos show hoards of fans congregated in front of the homes. The only place you ever see that is in front of the Hybe building.

Yes, it is controversial knowing these things but it is also one of those things that is almost unavoidable. What do I do with the information I gain by watching? Nothing. I satisfy my curiosity and move on.

Jungkook knows we are curious. He knows with his position in life there are things he cannot control and he's aware of it. It's pointless for him to pretend he isn't aware of this. That's why he sets boundaries. And he's very kind about it when he does set boundaries.

Are there bad actors out there who will take advantage of the knowledge? Of course. But that's on them. Are there people who will post every detail they learn? Of course. That's how the information spreads to other social media platforms.

Anyway... the Weverse translations are sort of skimming over what he says. There's a little bit of nuance being left out sometimes.

The Weverse English subs say "We'd sing it every day while taking showers." But Jungkook more accurately said: "We always sing together while taking a shower." (begins at 1:00:00)

The Weverse English subs say "Recently, with Jimin, now during our clean up time I finished up in the kitchen and came back up we talked a lot about music and we'd always be humming (he hums) and I'd go far away and sing songs (he gestures away from him). I'll try to practice more when I have time." But more accurately he said: "So these days I'm with Jimin and now when its personal maintenance time I go upstairs after finishing kitchen work. We talk a lot about singing and we're humming along to each other all the time (he hums) like that and we go far away and sing and stuff (he gestures away from him). I'll practice more in my spare time." (begins at 36:48)

The Weverse English subs say "I've been doing well with Jimin in my military life. I've been well." More accurately he said: "I'm/we are working hard and doing well in military life together with Jiminie-hyung. I'm doing well." (at 8:18)

He showed us his entertainment room, he clearly states he can't show us the upstairs but he does not give a reason why but as he talks he explains he has not "organized" his house. Maybe he won't show it because he doesn't want to or maybe he won't show it because in his opinion, its a mess right now. Regardless, its his choice what he wants to show us and we are privileged when he does so. I'd bet that at some point, we'll see his kitchen because he's Jungkook.

He talked about his job as a cook in the Army. He said he prepares many Korean dishes and they are either boiled or braised. He mentions that they cannot grill food. He says its not easy making large amounts of food. He says he does his best to make them tasty. I've noticed on the timeline the accounts that post military menus that on most days, meals include stews and soups so he is definitely learning how to cook a wide variety of dishes.

He sang about 30 songs including several off Golden. He sounded really good singing Standing Next to You, in fact, his off the cuff live singing of all the songs from his album was pretty exquisite even if he didn't sing most of the songs to the end.

He spoke with a slight reverence regarding only singing BTS songs with the rest of the members. It gave me the impression he knows it will be a special moment for them as well as us.

He picked at his lip, bit his cuticles, touched his lips, scratched his head under his beanie and yawned many times before finally telling us good night. Until we see you again soon, Kookie! Be safe and keep practicing with Jimin!

[resident-idiot-simp]

I know this has been said before, but Logan who isn't used to being picked up casually and just blue screening when Wade does it.

Wade comes up behind him and hoists him up to move him out of the way so he can get something in the kitchen.

Logan just freezes because.... WHAT?! HOW?! Very few people could ever lift him up in fact it was one of the students favorite past times. They would challenge one another to pick him up and he usually had to stop them before someone got hurt by being a bit too enthusiastic.

He could count on one hand who had managed to pick him up. No way had he expected Wade to make that list.

Wade hadn't noticed him freeze he had just went to doing whatever it is he was doing. Logan couldn't help but just stare. Wade turned back around with a cup and squinted at him.

"What's your deal?" Wade asked and Logan just blinked at him. Wade sighed. "Peanut what broke you?" He asked again.

"You picked me up." Logan says blankly. Wade squinted at him, "Yes." He confirms patiently.

Logan doesn't continue. Wade blinks, "Is-Is that..is it that easy broke you?" He asked confused.

"Wade people can't exactly just do that. I weigh like 500 pounds!" Logan explained exasperatedly. It was such a simple thing, but it was so foreign and brought back so many memories he couldn't help it.

Wade pursed his lips before putting his cup down and stepping forward. "What are you do-" Logan was cut off as Wade easily picked him up. Logan's face went red as Wade just looked up as him with gleaming eyes and a shit eating smile.

This wasn't fair Logan couldn't do this, this was bullshit! Wade looked like the cat who got the cream however as she swung him back and forth.

"Aaawww does my Wolvie like being carried?" The merc crooned and Logan ducked down hiding his face in the others neck.

"AW he does! All you had to do was tell me I'd be happy to carry you around." Wade continued on and Logan just grumbled into his neck.

This wasn't fair

[weareweirdpeople]

I want to apologize for how this post is written. I'm not discounting everything I said, but I acknowledge that I wrote this when very emotional, and that I definitely have built up anger at teachers for a variety of other issues. We do need better systems, and I absolutely belive it is not teachers at the core of it's problems. I was just angry at the time over the fact that despite the 8 (at least) different schools I've been too, I've had awful experiences due to teachers at pretty much every single one of them. A large amount of the issues were directly connected on going abuse and/or neglect happening in the background. Again, maybe its just me, but I hope you understand that after 8 schools, and sometimes behaviors and/or symptoms that were so blatantly obviously something happening at home being completely ignored or outright blamed on me when I was a small child, I have some resentment against teachers, if we don't also add other factors of resentment like ignoring my IEP when I had one, or scapegoating me at 6 years old for all behaviors I had that were directly connected to ptsd, something that teachers were told about through therapists, because I hadn't suddenly been an ok normal child after surving being domestically held hostage for around a year, only to find myself in another volatile abusive situation that was leading towards homicide, just like the one before, only a year later. To put it flatly, I have bias. I will say the fact that teachers can't actually, or at least every teacher, or even mandatory reporter I've met seems to be unable to actually acknowledge any of these things going on in the background to the child is a serious problem in my opinion. If there would've been any as mentioned kindness, or sympathy, or anything that wasn't followed by police showing up or walking away to call the police, like for example, not immediately being mocked and questioned for not knowing the current problems in math class because I had been hospitalized for 2 weeks straight after being unable to handle everything going on at home and telling a councilor, I would probably have less resentment.

I think that the whole system is fucked, and I was angry at the people who were consistently fucking me over regardless of if they wanted to. I was upset when I wrote this, but I hope you can understand why someone would be upset at people who absolutely had direct control over how a crucial part of their life was wherever or not they thought of it that way.

Maybe its just me but I think its really fucked up that the only way teachers can "help" a child is with cps and the fucking police. I think its really fucked up that they're constantly talking about "tell a trusted adult" when sometimes you just don't fucking have one. Because all of them were bad options. I think its fucked up that my, and many many many children's only fucking options have been tell someone and put everything in danger or do nothing and continue on in silence. I think its fucked up that even without saying it I had to start understanding that no matter how kinda a teacher, or counselor, or school staff member was to me at times, that they would never put me over them being held liable or their job. I would never be that important. They get to pat themselves on the back while I get put in handcuffs and put treated like an example of what not to do as if im not even there. I think its really fucked up that at a certain point it will never matter how nice a teacher is, no matter how many "I know it sucks...." or "I'm sorry but it's my job..."s or "I don't want to have to do this..."s you get, because its always the same fucking thing. Your a liability, and no adult is going to risk their job with a child that they could easily just hand to someone else more 'qualified' to handle.

[callme-holly]

okay do this with whatever boy(s) you want but like what abt them x reader who is just like the happiest person ever. they havent lived the prettiest life, its clear, but theyre still so happy, they just find a way to love everything. the way theyre always laughing, the way they point out simple things with just beaming joy. theyll see a random bird and start ranting about how cool it would be to be able to fly like that, how they love birds and how beautiful they are. they see bugs and talk about how pretty they are even if theyre a bit scared of it. they gush about how the grass feels cool at night and the way it gives them goosebumps all with a smile of giddiness at the dark. theres nothing they dont love, and they make sure he see the beauty in everything too, slowly but surely.

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐞!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐚/𝐧 : im finally on christmas break y'all!! i've still got quite a lot of requests to get through, but im scatty as hell so please bear with me

Darry Curtis:

Your positive energy is something Darry craves in his life. He’s been through more than anyone should ever have to face, and when he met you, you were like a breath of fresh air. He knows your life hasn’t always been perfect, but neither has his, and you two balance each other out.  After a long day of work, all he wants is to sit on the couch with you curled up beside him, rambling about all the little things in your day that have made you happy. He loves the sound of your laugh, your smile, and the way you move your hands when you talk. He starts to notice things he might not have noticed before and learns to slow down a little and appreciate life as it comes. 

Sodapop Curtis:

You and Soda are a match made in heaven. You’re both such happy, positive people, despite everything you’ve both gone through, and people can't help but envy you both.  The two of you will sit together on the porch and talk for hours about your day, no matter how good or bad it may have been, pointing out all the little things you loved about it. Soda makes it his sole challenge to make you laugh all the time; he just loves seeing you smile. You both see the world from the same point of view, and no matter what it throws at you, you both learn to love every little thing. 

Ponyboy Curtis:

Pony finds your happiness both relieving and fascinating. We all know he can get a little down sometimes, and having someone like you around to pick him back up is something he needs.  Watching the sunsets together is a key part of y'all's routine; you always take the time out of your days to sit together and watch all the colours as they blend into one, appreciating the beauty of nature. Pony will read poems to you when you’re both alone in the house, and you’ll always make an effort to point out the tiny little details, laughing about them and smiling throughout. 

Johnny Cade:

Johnny’s homelife is pretty awful, as we all know, so having someone like you around who is always so upbeat is something he desperately needs. He loves listening to you ramble, and he’ll just nod along as you tell him about all the wonderful little things you saw on your walk. He can’t help but smile whenever you do; he laughs when you laugh. You really help to brighten up his life, and you help him see things a little more positively, even if it’s just for a little while. 

Dallas Winston:

Your positivity probably annoys Dally a little. It’s not that he wants to rain on your parade; it’s just that he can't see what's so good about the world that you need to constantly be talking about it. He always tries to make a snarky comment whenever you start gushing over something small, but the moment he sees your smile, he forgets whatever it is he was going to say. Something about your outlook on life confuses and intrigues him, and he slowly starts to realise it’s not all bad.  He’s not the type to gush about it, but sometimes you’ll catch the subtle things he does to show his appreciation for you: the way his smirk softens when you laugh, the way he pulls you closer when you ramble. 

Steve Randle:

Steve is drawn to your energy like a moth to a flame. He’s home life isn’t grand either, and it amazes him how you manage to find so much good in the tiniest things. He teases you for it, but he loves the way your eyes light up at the simplest things, and he finds himself going out of his way to make you laugh or smile. On his lunch break, he’ll hold you close while you tell him about all the things you’d seen on your way over, and he’ll just chuckle and kiss you softly. Your positive perspective is something he needs desperately, and he finds that time seems to slow down whenever you’re together. 

Two-Bit Mathews:

Two thrives off of your happiness and always manages to return it with the same energy. He loves how you can see the silver lining in almost any situation, and he always finds himself joining in with you as you marvel at the little things in life. Your laugh has him cracking up, and if you’re smiling, so is he. He firmly believes that you light up any room you walk into, and he just helps to keep that light shining bright.  While he’s probably the most positive one of the gang, he’d never taken the time to slow down and appreciate the little things until he met you, and now thats he’s got you, he can’t seem to stop.

[owldownag]

Amir Romantic Gemini Emote Lines

bby gurl is gonna end me he's so sweet, why can't i stop dating people who bark for me even in video games?

"Anybody order a Smart and Sexy? I got an order here, hot off the grill!

Boo yeah! Let's do this babe.

Never fear, your baby Amir is here.

Honey, I'm hooome!

Aw, I missed you too, my wittle fwuffy duck.

This is gonna be good! You are just so adorable when you are covered in blood-- that came out wrong.

The couple that slays together shtays together *uwu*

My Shmoopie and Me: The Love Story of a Genius H4XX0r! and his Wacko Time Traveler

Ah, I love you too, cuddleywumps~

Y'know, this whole "having someone drive me around" thing would suck if it weren't you. Love you!

"That's right, nobody touches my SO! barks"

Funny, I was just thinking of you, heh, my little velvet owl.

Some people give each other flowers. Other people wear each other like meatsuits.

Kisses!

clears throat A haiku for you Because I love you so much Let's go kill things… fffffffish

I wonder if I'm still ticklish like this. Maybe we can find out later.

singing Gonna share a body with the one I love, which is weird, but it's okay, cuz we're in love, doodideedoo"

update (missed a line) Babe after this what do you say we get some pad Thai?

[bossuary]

Neve is painless. Rook is real.

Lucanis likes Neve because she represents what he is desperate to regain. He wants to feel normal, to work and cook and focus on the things he used to enjoy (such as they were) before the Ossuary. He wants capital R Romance, right out of a book.

Most importantly, he wants to get rid of Spite. He wants to pretend that he is the man he was...not this abomination.

Without truly knowing her, Lucanis believes Neve is a pathway to all of that. He's attracted to her, and she to him. Their flirting has an edge, but it's also friendly. She dislikes Spite, and her presence makes Spite disappear.

Neve will tell Lucanis that he's still himself, and that Spite doesn't change that. She will never be the one to reconcile Lucanis with Spite, to get them to accept each other. So, yeah, he gravitates to the charming, flirty, warm person who (through no fault of her own, really) feeds his desire to pretend he's not an abomination.

Even early on, I think he's smart enough to know that accepting Spite is his only option, but he...just... can't. With what tools? Nothing in his life has prepared him to deal with this. Rook does that. When denial tears Lucanis apart, Rook puts him back together with acceptance. Rook accepts the reality of Spite, and deals with it head-on every time.

Neve will remind Lucanis that she's not going anywhere. She'll tell him to open his eyes and look at facts, but she (probably) won't be the one to push him out of his own prison. Lucanis knows this, so Spite knows this, and therefore Spite will not look to Neve for help.

It's important for Lucanis to accept that Spite has changed him. But when it's Rook who says it--for whom Lucanis has developed real feelings, not idealized ones--well, it destroys the fantasy Lucanis clings to so vehemently, the one where he isn't this.

For me, the Lucanis/Rook romance feels the way it does NOT because the writers "preferred" that Lucanis and Neve get together, but because Neve is simply easier for Lucanis to accept. She's easier to talk to, unchallenging. Easy isn't bad! Comfort isn't bad! God knows they both deserve some comfort.

Loving Rook is a profoundly complex choice. There's not a lot of cute ways to work that profundity into sexy banter. It makes sense, then, that Lucanis doesn't have as much dialogue for a romanced Rook as he does with Neve. What he can do is cook, make small gestures. He can, heartbreakingly, tell Rook, over and over, that he doesn't have the words to express how he feels. That's such an awful state, knowing that the person you care about needs to hear words you simply cannot locate. As soon as he does have the words, he shares them.

Rook is real. And real is not easy.

To Lucanis, Rook represents a difficult path to recovery, a path he has to keep choosing to follow, every day. At a time in his life where he is incapable of seeing Spite (and his own PTSD ) as anything but a 'distraction' to shove aside, Rook shows genuine interest in helping Lucanis heal. Rook takes consistent action toward that goal, particularly when it's clear that Lucanis doesn't know how.

Lucanis also has to believe that he's worth the effort, his own and his love's. Neve is great, love her, but I don't see this struggling cynic, this chronic worrier, being very helpful in the self-worth department. No, people in a relationship do not have to perform therapeutic roles. But, partners do have to respect each others' boundaries and needs.

Of course Lucanis goes all-in for Neve, romantically, even while he and Rook are dancing around each other. Accepting how much he loves and cares for Rook means looking at himself the way Rook does. That is so much harder than whatever will happen with Neve.

The fact that Lucanis isn't afraid to pursue Neve, even if Treviso is blighted, tells me that Neve is an indulgence for him. Again, that's not a value judgement. If they treat each other with respect, then the merits of the relationship don't have to fall on whether Lucanis 'heals' as a result. Sometimes not hurting all the time is enough.

BUT. Contrast the ease he feels with Neve with his feelings about Rook:

"When I was afraid to want you..."

That is a powerful admission.

What was he afraid of? The annihilation of neglect, worthlessness, and shame. The awful but knowable pillars of his existence.

Wanting Rook means that Lucanis wants to dismantle everything he knows in pursuit of something he doesn't. To love Rook is to love and accept himself, exactly as he is.

Then...then...Lucanis finds real comfort.

[ultramaga]

"Males are evil on a biological level"? Imagine if a human found there were demons, and told other humans about it. Would they just sit there moaning about it for sixty years, or would they take up arms - or flee? Feminists lie constantly. They lie that men are evil, and we know it's a lie because they neither fight nor flee. Instead, they bitch at men that they should feel bad.

If we were genuinely as they say, we would just kill feminists. Especially if, as they claim, we run the world. So the terrible evil overlords just let them squat about all day doing nothing except bitching?

Feminists are awful, and radfems are just the worst. This is what happens when people have nothing in their lives, no responsibilities, just sitting at home all day every day... And I have to wonder if it's because these people have never been useful. In the past, kids and teens had to do some work. But this is a generation raised without anything past maybe a little homework.

Growing up, I saw kids that were useful, that learned skills and self reliance, and they became strong and independent. I can't think of any radfems that resulted from these successful people.

So here's a proposition. We take the radfems, put them on a survival island, maybe leave them with tins of food and can openers until they can grow crops etc. I think they will starve to death screaming at men to open the tins for them. These are totally dependent useless people - but the prison is in their minds.

If you have never struggled, you will never know your own strength.

“Not all men”

Yes all men.

The widespread oppression of women would never have happened in the first place without every male’s contribution.

In the west women have fought incredibly hard for what rights we have now, however just a few short decades ago we had none of that, because males enforced it that way. You cannot have such a widespread oppression without each and every oppressor pushing it. This isn’t mere “social upbringing”, it’s an innate drive to hurt and control. Males are evil on a biological level, they are not capable of real change, they’ve well proven that. Every male you know is just a bad dog on a leash.

The male has not changed from 100 or so years ago, if these laws keeping us “safe” didn’t exist, all males would treat us the very same as they did in the 1940s.

In eastern countries women are still fighting for even the basic rights we now have, the males in those countries are no different from the males in western countries, the only difference is the existence of laws and punishments. Have a look at our sisters in eastern countries, how many males amongst them fall into the “not all men” “category”?

[thequeenofsastiel]

I'm curious about something: Why is it that a shockingly large majority of us are more invested in Fadel and Style's relationship than Kant and Bison's? I'd make a poll, but I'd much rather hear people's longer opinions. I think for me, it's a mixture of things. For instance, even though Style had an ulterior motive for hitting on Fadel, it was less sinister. Not that I blame Kant for having to be a narc, but convincing Bison to fall in love with him was unnecessarily cruel. He could have just been friends with benefits with him. Instead, he's engineered it so that Bison will go to a horrific prison with a broken heart. So there's just a level of subtle coldness on Kant's part. I can't root for them because of how wrong I consider what Kant is doing to Bison. I know Bison is a killer, but he was forced into it and is trying desperately to stop. So honestly, I feel like Bison deserves better than Kant.

Plus it just makes me uncomfortable to watch someone pretend to be into BDSM when they clearly aren't. Also I'd never buy Bison as a Dom in a million years. Which isn't really Khao's fault, he gave off slight Dom vibes in The Eclipse, idk why he hasn't been properly directed to here.

Style, on the other hand, had no idea what he was doing. He didn't know that he was helping condemn Fadel to a prison which entirely disregards human rights. Were his motivations pure? Absolutely not and I very much judge him for it. But it was at least less cold and cruel. And he clearly fell for Fadel and feels awful about helping send him to prison. I strongly suspect that very soon Style is going to plot a way to save Fadel.

Plus they actually are both kinky and super into it and that just does it for me.

Y'all?

[misshunterskye]

in which zayne turns your bad day into an amazing night ... a one shot i wrote because i got kind of sad and thought about how zayne would probably be an amazing & comforting presense. so we got this out of that lol.

You're having an absolutely awful day. You come into your apartment, trying to think about anything that isn't your work load, your training schedule, and your lack of food intake. Your stomach growls in protest, and as you slam your purse down onto the counter, you realize that it will probably be another 2 hours before Zayne gets home to hang with you.

And you can't help it. You start sobbing. You're still sobbing 5 minutes later when Zayne rings your phone. You sniffle a few time trying to calm down before answering. You still still sound awful when you pick up with a timid and weak: "Hey."

There's a pause on the other end of the phone, and you can almost see him analyzing the situation. "You sound like you're having a bad day, my love."

And it's that simple acknowledgment. The way he knows you enough to know exactly what's wrong. That something is wrong. Most of the time, people buy your fake smile.

Zayne doesn't.

"Well, lucky enough, I was calling to tell you my last patient cancelled, and I'm ahead on my paperwork. I'm already on my way to you."

A smile breaks over your face, "Yeah?"

"Yeah. I'll see you in just a second."

In about 30 minutes, you hear the door open and shut. There's a bit of shuffling, so you go to meet him in the foyer -- and see him carrying a bouquet of your favorite flowers, a grocery bag of your favorite snacks, and take out dinner.

It's almost enough to make you cry again, but this time out of pure happiness. You take the bouquet from him, and before he can even say anything, you're kissing him deeply.

"I love you," you say, in between kisses. "I'm so lucky to have you."

He chuckles against your lips. "I love you too. Come on, my love, let's get settled in. I want to hear all about what's wrong."

[perseephoneee]

secret santa [ficmas day 12] [stiles stilinski x afab!reader]

↳ masterlist ↳ ship exchange ↳ taglist ↳ ficmas 2024

@mayfieldss: Since you're extending ficmas may I request stiles stilinski and secret santa plssssss

author's note: my boyfriend said that if teen wolf had modern slang it would be one of the worst things he'd ever watch

playlist:

buy me presents -- sabrina carpenter

christmas caller -- beach bunny

santa, can't you hear me -- kelly clarkson & ariana grande

"Why did Lydia think this was a good idea?" Stiles groaned, opening the 'Secret Santa email.' Scott was sitting on his bed doing homework while Stiles debated the merits of ignoring the email. 

"Because she says this is cheaper than us all having to get gifts for each other."

Stiles ignored that comment and opened the email to receive his assignment. He could think of a few different ideas for the various people in his life. Scott was easy; they were best friends. Isaac could get an embroidered scarf that said, 'I'm bitter for no reason.' Derek could get a new personality, although Stiles didn't know how much that would cost. 

He watched the wheel spin on the automated Secret Santa email, and against his best wishes, he got your name. 

"No, no, no," Stiles kept trying to refresh the page, hoping for a different answer. Scott looked up in personality, getting off the bed to see his screen. He started laughing when he saw your name. 

"You're screwed."

"This is awful!" Stiles spun around in his chair. "I can't get the girl I like a gift; she's going to hate it."

"Probably."

"Has anyone ever told you that you're not helpful?" Stiles looked at Scott, raising his brow. Scott patted him on the shoulder. Stiles hit his shoulder, and it quickly devolved into a wrestling match with Stiles in a headlock and Scott getting kicked in the face. Sheriff Stilinski entered a second later. He took one look at the scene and left a second later. 

After Stiles lost in wrestling, they ended up at the mall. They agreed that it was the most likely place to find a gift. Scott had to shop for Isaac, which Stiles was weirdly envying at this moment. 

"Okay, we're going to split up. Meet in an hour at the food court."

"For food?"

"Yes," Stiles sighed. "And to check progress."

"But also for food?" Scott questioned. "I've been craving a corndog."

"Scott, I need you to lock in," Stiles groaned. He had been staring out at the bright expanse of the mall and was already developing a migraine. "We have a mission."

"You have a mission," Scott nudged Stiles with his shoulder. "I'm doing fine."

"I really hate you," Stiles muttered as Scott took off towards whatever he smelled. Likely a pretzel. He was strangely food-motivated. 

Stiles checked out Bath and Body Works first, but after feeling like he would pass out from the smells, he elected to leave. He wandered into a Brandy Melville and got offended by the sizing (or lack thereof). He then sat on a bench outside the darkest clothing store he'd ever seen. Just as Stiles wished for divine intervention, Lydia came into sight. She beelined over to him immediately. 

"Do I want to know why you're here?" she asked, arms crossed. Stiles squinted up at her.

"Because of your stupid Secret Santa and my stupid assignment," Stiles said, sinking further into his bench. Lydia sat down next to him. 

"You got Y/N, didn't you?"

"How–"

"I know things," Lydia pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Stiles glared at her. She crossed her legs, looking over at Stiles. "I'm going to help you because you make me sad."

"Thanks."

"What have you thought of so far?"

Stiles pondered for a second.

"A sexy candle."

"Okay, I'm going to say no to that immediately," Lydia opened her purse, grabbed out a lipgloss, and reapplied it. Stiles had no idea why she needed to reapply it. "Let's go look around at a few places."

Stiles wished for Scott in that moment. Scott didn't stress him out to no end. Lydia dragged him to eleven different stores and shot down almost all of his ideas. He was ready to quit, move to a different state, and change his name in order to avoid disappointing you at Secret Santa. You were too important to him to disappoint. Right as Stiles' legs started hurting, he saw one store that gave him pause. 

"I'm going in there," Stiles announced, ignoring Lydia's protests. It was a traditional gift store with various accessories, gag gifts, home decor, and more. He avoided the seasonal aisle and the stupid kitchen towels with quotes on them to make a beeline for the kids' section, specifically the stuffed animal section. 

He saw a floppy Snoopy and pulled it off the top shelf. Stiles showed Lydia. 

"What do you think?" Stiles asked. He was out of breath from his quick run into the store. "She loves Snoopy; she mentions it whenever there's a Snoopy thing."

Lydia smiled, taking the Snoopy from him. She gave it a few squishes for good measure. 

"It's perfect; nice job, Stiles."

"Thank you," Stiles beamed. He tossed the Snoopy back and forth between his hands. "Who did you get for Secret Santa?"

"Derek."

"Just get him a new personality."

"I hope you know that both you and Y/N said that," Lydia rolled her eyes. Stiles grinned, moving to the cash register to buy his Snoopy. He paid a little extra to get it wrapped (he can't wrap it for his life) and skipped out of the store. Stiles pulled out his phone to check the time, guessing he should probably be catching back up with Scott. He, of course, ran into you at that exact moment. 

Literally ran into it. 

"Hey, Stiles," you laughed, catching him by the shoulders. His cheeks burned red as he saw who it was. 

"Hey!" he grimaced. "What are you doing here?"

"Probably the same as you, Secret Santa shopping," you shrugged. He liked whatever you did with your hair today. However, Stiles has always loved whatever you did. You eyed the bag in his hand. "Did you get something already?"

"Yeah…I had help from Lydia," Stiles scratched the back of his neck. 

"I'll see you around, Stilinski," you punched his shoulder, running off to who knows where. Stiles was still frozen in place a second later. He shook himself out of his stupor, immediately running to the food court to look for Scott. 

~

Scott and Stiles showed up in matching ugly Christmas sweaters to Lydia's Secret Santa party. They were very proud that they found not one but two of them at Goodwill and felt it was a theme to show up in. Lydia was not amused. 

She almost refused to let them in. 

Stiles was excited to see that you were already there. You had on sparkly tights and a sweater dress, and Stiles was once again struck by the thought that you were the prettiest girl in the room. He suddenly felt very stupid in his sweater. You took notice as he approached. 

"Oh, that's hilarious," you laughed, reading his top. It had all the reindeer decorating the tree on top of each other, saying 'Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, on top of Vixen.'

"That's what I thought. Lydia disagrees," Stiles sat down next to you. You curled up your legs underneath you. 

"Lydia is stressed about the party."

"She throws the best parties; why is she stressed?" Stiles saw a platter of cookies out on the coffee table and took one for himself. He offered you half. 

"Probably because you have to constantly be stressed to throw the best parties." You accepted half of his cookie.

"Touche."

Stiles was gleeful that he could talk to you until the present reveals started. Everyone else showed up, and at forty-five minutes past the hour, Lydia called everyone to attention to exchange gifts. Suddenly, Stiles felt very nervous. 

It was easy for him to get caught up in everyone else's excitement and forget about his own doom, so when he received his gift (some nice plaid shirts from Allison), he got all clammy as he handed you yours. Your eyes lit up as you saw the bag. 

"I knew it was for me," you whispered, recognizing the bag from the mall. Stiles shrugged, wringing his hands. You unwrapped it carefully and then let out a squeal of delight as you saw the Snoopy. Stiles let out a sigh of relief. 

"I know you love Snoopy."

"Not just any Snoopy, Joe Cool Snoopy," you grinned, hugging the plush to your chest. "He's really cool."

"That's why they call him Joe Cool," Stiles answered. Lydia gave him a subtle nod from the other side of the room. Everyone else got to open their gifts, which is when Lydia brought out the champagne she stole from her Mom's stash. Very quickly, everyone got a pleasant buzz that only made the conversation louder. You nudged Stiles and gestured towards the kitchen, Snoopy still in hand. He followed after you. 

You launched yourself at him as soon as you got in the kitchen. 

"The gift is perfect," you mumbled, voice blocked by his shirt. Stiles thought you smelled like peppermint. You pulled away to look at him. "Thank you."

"A-Anything for you," Stiles stuttered, struck by how close you guys were. You didn't seem to notice or mind. 

"I have a gift for you."

"You didn't get me in Secret Santa," Stiles asked, confused. You just shook your head. 

"A gift of my own volition."

You leaned up and kissed him, lips still tasting of champagne. Stiles could do nothing but melt into you. He was dumbstruck when you parted. 

"Merry Christmas, Stiles," you hummed. Stiles grinned, kissing you again. 

"Merry Christmas, Y/N."

[romanology]

tropes i plan to make jegulus fics out of

hitman (James) vs target (Regulus) Regulus is some sort of important figure like a politician or a CEO and James absolutely hates everything Regulus' business stands for, so he and his rebellion called the Marauders (which Sirius isn't in) decide that they're going to kill Regulus to send a message. But when they storm the building and when James runs upstairs to hold Regulus at gunpoint, he doesn't expect Regulus to be so young. It was as though he'd been thrust into this job. But as soon as a sentence comes out of Regulus' mouth, James realises just how wrong he was. Also enemies to lovers because obviously.

gentleman thief (James) vs corrupted detective (Regulus) 'Come on, don't you want to join the dark side?' 'I accept bribes. I'm already on the dark side, moron.' 'Harsh words from a guy with a pistol.' 'I can literally see your gun in your pocket.' 'Are you sure that's a gun, Detective?' '...shut the fuck up.' Rivals???? to (reluctant) friends to lovers

soulmates destined to kill each other When your souls are bound together, you feel trapped. There's nothing except the title of soulmate on your head. Like the blade of a guillotine hanging over your neck. Nobody can handle it for long. But Regulus seems so sweet. Why would anyone want to kill him?

lovers to friends to strangers Sometimes, things just don't work out. And that's okay. Regulus didn't really expect to stay with James forever. He saw how James sometimes looked at Lily. Regulus looked at Barty the same way too, sometimes. But no matter. They didn't work out. It's okay. They can still be friends, of course.

reverse hanahaki disease Instead of coughing up flowers, people would instead go into a zombie-like state where they start gorging themselves on flowers instead.

one-sided hatred + holiday fic 'James Potter? Is that the overly pretentious Chaser on the Quidditch team? Gryffindor, yeah? God. I hate him. He's awful.' 'Regulus Black? Oh, yeah, he's my best friend! My boyfriend, if my confessing to him this Christmas works out! <3' 'Sorry, James said he was going to what??'

WELL. I was going to add more but I can't find more tropes to twist into my weird mind. Anyhow. Which one do you think you'd read! ^^

[mad-hatter-memes]

FunkyFrogBait Starters

A collection of dialogue prompts from the videos by FunkyFrogBait. Feel free to edit quotes as necessary.

TW: Swearing, threats, and suggestive references

"My fellow Caucasians astound us with their ingenuity yet again..."

"This is just an evil, evil thing to do with pasta..."

"No spaghetti for you, sir."

"I could be doing any number of things with my life, but I've chosen to share this moment with you...Don't you feel so special?"

"This feels very forbidden..."

"I don't know what this is but it's not fettucine!"

"I just scalded myself! That was uncomfortable..."

"To be clear...I would not feed this to a dog..."

"This esophagus is rated E for everything!"

"Aren't I a lucky little boy? Only 40% of these are broken!"

"Is this a complaint that I'm hearing? Spitters are quitters, [Name]."

"It's just you and me, [Name]. So...who's gonna union with you?"

"If there is a god, he has abandoned us for celestial milk and cigarettes."

"That looks like something that would leak out of an infected wound!"

"This looks like porridge was spilled on the floor of a gym locker room and left to ferment for forty days and forty nights!"

"Trying to boil Pringles to make mashed potatoes is like trying to send her flowers after she's already taken the kids."

"Hahahaha, that's really cute, how about you go fuck yourself?!"

"Being a dad seems pretty fun; All you have to do is sometimes remember their names and forget to pick them up from soccer practice. "

"Now, now, don't be hysterical, dear. This is a nearly painless procedure...For me anyways!"

"I have not been allowed around a glue gun since...The incident..."

"The caveman method usually works in my experience."

"Aw babe, your texture makes me wanna barf."

"Now the nice thing about turkey bacon is that you can eat it raw! I think..."

"This says says it serves twenty four people...They haven't met me."

"Hello, Mr. [Last Name]. I'm here to pick up your daughter."

"Please don't call the police...I know this a weird use of my free time but it's technically not illegal."

"I'm about to give myself an accidental haircut..."

"Can I just call up a priest and have him waterboard me...?"

"Whoookay...This makes me want to join a nunnery."

"Who up praying with they rosary right now?"

"STOP FINGERING EVERYTHING! I AM A CHILD OF GOD!"

"Girl, what foundation is that?! Not a pore in sight!"

"[Name], honey. You're already slaying, you don't need to slay innocent civilians."

"Where did they find this child? The Victorian Era?!"

"ASAB: Assigned Sidekick at Birth. How unfortunate..."

"Who is giving these children access to deadly weapons?! Hello?!"

"The kids like thirteen. Just throw a Roblox gift card as hard as you can and run in the opposite direction."

"[Character Name] is dead, [Muse Name]! And you're worried about the fidelity of this game to it's source material?!"

"Paint a picture for us, [Name]! Don't hold back!"

"I would've bully the fuck outta this kid. And I did musical theater!"

"Where are people getting all this Tannerite?! I want some!"

"Is the cockroach infestation required or optional?"

"I'm being manipulated by a gothic aesthetic and common sense!"

"Yikes! Don't show that to your grandma!"

"That's my heart after the hot girl in my Com Sci class tells me that our star signs are incompatible!"

"I really wouldn't talk how other people look if your eyebrows can't agree on what timezone they're in."

"Is god really rockin' with you? Sinner..."

"Let me eat my oreos in peace goddamnit!"

"I'M GONNA START POWERWASHING THE CEILING!"

"You know what crybaby fumblefingers? At this point you owe me money. Hand over twenty, pretty boy!

"Why is she beckoning me ominously...?"

"That's because you've been selected for ritual sacrifice, [Name]. You know how they are this time of the month..."

"Do you have family, [Name]? Anyone you'd be particularly devastated to lose in a violent and sudden way?"

"You know what, [Name]? I'd probably punch you over a Hot Wheels too!"

"I see god's law not as a restriction...but a challenge!"

"I am deeply dissatisfied with my life choices and I am NOT afraid to make that your problem at five o' clock in the morning!"

"I hope one of your family members is in a car accident this week!"

"It's fucking terrible and I'm overcome by a desire to kill James Corden for some reason!"

"I'm sorry...Do you think mother earth is just lactating blue raspberry surprise, bitch?!"

[cxffecoupx]

dear santa

lee seokmin + jokingly going up to the santas at the mall and embarrassing the other one wc: 645 warnings: written in a rush to finish the series, seokmin being painfully embarassing author's notes: I'm so sorry I keep posting such mediocre stuff i really don't wish to😭😭 also this should preferably be read before chan's drabble 'wrapping errors'. but I hope you like it <3 winter wonderland masterlist

"i think the store over there has some good gifts," you point towards the store with one hand to seokmin around who you've wrapped your other hand.

seokmin's still in awe over all the christmas decorations done in the mall when you look at him. red sparkling decor hangs from the high roof, glistening when light hits it at particular angles; lights arranged in the figures of reindeers and pandas; arches made of green leaves, with stars dangling at points; santas standing at various places in the mall, talking and playing with the kids that have come to the shopping center.

christmas is in full swing here.

however, you're falling behind because the two of you have spent days procrastinating and postponing buying the gifts for people you're meeting on christmas. like every year, all of you are meeting at seungcheol's place for the big bash he throws regularly, and for you, staying away from your family, they have become a second family to you.

you head over to the shop and look around for a while, contemplating whether to buy the most beautiful things you see there, even though they're basically useless to anyone. you manage to purchase a few presents, and when you're leaving, you notice that seokmin is nowhere to be found.

hands full of bags and gifts, you exit the store, mind wandering just like your eyes trying to spot him in the crowd. couples and families thronged the place, kids walking around with balloons and candies possibly gifted by the santas.

how the hell were you gonna find him?

the thought didn't stay for long when you hear his voice from somewhere, "yn!!"

"minnie?" when you look over though, you instantly wish that you hadn't.

there he stood, a few feet away from you, wearing an exact same white beard like the santa standing near him. the prop looked odd with the rest of his clothes, and his pose suggested that he was clearly losing some marbles. even the santa nearby seemed to ignore the embarassing creature standing near him.

you'd always had the fantasy of him role-playing as santa during sex, especially around xmas, but if this is what it's gonna be, you'd rather take up chastity. seriously.

"yn! wait why are you walking away- YN, c'mere. this is so fun," seokmin calls out to you again, this time louder, and the people nearby follow his gaze to see a shy you, face the colour of a ripe tomato. you could only wish that the ground would swallow you up.

and if all this wasn't enough, your boyfriend decides to laugh in an obnoxious manner, a distinct 'ho ho ho' echoing through the mall even in the chatter of the crowd.

that's when the mall starts playing one of your favourite songs, a song he'd start singing whenever, wherever you were. when you turn around to look at him, you see him already watching you, eyes searching yours for the silent message that comes with the song.

Shall I stay?

Would it be a sin

If I can't help falling in love with you?

you walk over to him, pressing a quick kiss to his lips before taking his extended hand to pull him away from the crowd. you return the beard to the santa with an awkwardness you're sure he understands as well, and return to seokmin, who's now decided to entertain a few kids who'd thought he was santa indeed, and the sight melts away any urgency you'd felt. it replaces with a warm and cosy feeling that slowly settles in your tummy.

"the kids loved me; i make a pretty good santa, don't i?" he asks when he sees you near him.

"i don't know about santa, but you'd make a pretty good dad. now let's get home quick now, we have to wrap the gifts."

prompt by @novelbear; dividers by @adornedwithlight

[yooniesim]

Just wanted to let you know that tearybite might be making some good points but shes over on twitter acting the fool throwing the R slur about on the daily and interacting positively with transphobic and ableist accounts.

There are better people out there making the same points. This girl is just mack with a dental plan.

Nonny, im going to sue you for making me look on fucking twitter smh. it's like i can feel the terminally online virus entering my veins 🤢

anyway, I'm all for getting the truth out, but what we're gonna do is try to be accurate in our claims bc atp I hate random people the internet just saying whatever they want because they dunno how to compare bad behavior accurately. Mack was an extremely fucked up bigot that was openly racist, ableist, transphobic, targeting black & trans ppl specifically, and harassed many people on this & other platforms for months at a time. What we're not gonna do is compare anyone to that freak without sufficient evidence to back up that claim. Ppl can have levels to their shittiness so let's remember that first. Unlike Mack, I'm... hoping she'll have a genuine change...? 😭 (inb4 my hope for ppl gets destroyed yet again)

Now... when I went on Twitter and skimmed, what i saw was an account that seemed to make fun of some transphobic/awful ppl (nick fuentes, djt) at times, but an... overall concerning amount of slurs and questionable vibes. Now idk what her story is, idk if she's trans and/or autistic & doing the reclaimed thing or if she genuinely just throws slurs around bc she thinks it's ok for some awful reason, but yeah. I'm kinda getting the vibes that she could be autistic (hence the referring to herself/inward with the slur at times) but i just personally don't really like ppl throwing that shit around flippantly like that. Plus the trans shit and tweet re: white sins gave me a specific ick. I'll post what I saw & let yall judge for yourselves and if she wants to respond she can, or not. She said shes a lurker on my page so I'm sure she'll see this. I'm thankfully not online enough there to say if the other accounts she interacts with are known bigots or not so I can't really say on that. Is she as bad as Mack? I don't think so. But it's a lil... it's a lil ick ngl.

(tw for r slurs, trans related slur, yt ppl, kinda weird vibes idk)

Edit: there's more that I missed, seems like there's a lot of dogwhistles and shit. I haven't been online enough lately/on Twitter enough to recognize it all but yeah. It's giving Terf vibes too. Ick.