#can't crochet

[freshstitches]

One of my posts keeps getting reblogged with hashtags like

It's funny because a while ago, I made a few KNITTING patterns that purposefully look like CROCHET.

I call it faux-chet.

Off the hook shawl - yes, it's knit.

Some of you may find these patterns interesting, they're all I cord based stitches. I know that most of these would be basic projects to crochet, but not everybody knows how. I designed these for people who want the look but don't have time or the desire to learn a new craft.

Loaded Taco Shawl

Another advantage of these faux-chet patterns is that they use a lot less yarn than crochet. The taco above uses i cord like chain stitch, it only weighs 85 g. The boardwalk wrap and top below mimics fillet crochet openwork.

All of these faux-chet patterns are made with a technique that I call the lattice stitch. I made a YouTube playlist of the basics and sometimes teach classes on this topic.

I named this pattern Definitely a Knit Shawl to avoid Ravelry mods relabeling it AND included photos of it on the needles to prove that is actually knitted. I have had arguments with people who think that I just crochet poorly and that's why my stitches look funny.

If you think the stitch is interesting, you should definitely check it out. The YouTube videos are free and I have plenty more patterns on my Ravelry page that use this technique.

[castletemprwine]

i'd devour you whole if you'd let me 🩸🫀

hand knit and crocheted, words by me

[sea-salted-wolverine]

Nothing quite like a new crochet pattern to really drive home the fact that I can't count. not even to big numbers, I have failed to count to 5. This baby blanket will be able to teach my niece profanity just by osmosis. This thing had better be fucking treasured for generations. It's gonna be gorgeous. I can't count. Also. What the FUCK is a double treble and why would anyone think thats a good thing to call it that. Front post half double, yeah, sure, fine, I got that. I can do that, we can even abbreviate to something terrible. Thank God this is ombre yarn because if this was all the same color I would have made the news by now.

[fennopunk]

It's kinda funny when someone sees me unravel a fiber project either partially or completely, and gets distressed on my behalf and I have to go "No no no, it's part of the process! You gotta trust the process."

[thelittlecellwhocould]

15+ hours of crocheting/knitting in the last 3 days but I gotta say I'm extremely proud of how this last minute present turned out 🤩

(is it really last minute if I've had at least 3 rows crocheted for the last 2 years though??)

the inspiration

[trashpandacraft]

knitters and/or crocheters, a poll for you! i'm a long-time knitter and very occasional crocheter; my wife is capable of knitting but very much prefers crochet. i feel like many (maybe most?) people have a strong inclination to one craft or the other, and am wondering how true that is.

i ran out of options in the poll, so this assumes that you're more skilled at the craft you prefer. if you're objectively better at knitting but really love crochet, or vice versa, please accept my apologies, and maybe go with 'prefer [whatever], equally skilled'.

for the 'prefer, but can' options, 'can' is meant to encompass basically any level of skill from 'i can do the most basic stitches' to 'i'm genuinely skilled at this, but clearly not as skilled as i am at the other craft'.

i imagine that this will only have like twelve votes, so it may not tell me much, but i'm interested anyway!

[lirulua]

I hate money <3

So we're just in a perpetually tight spot, apparently and my mental health is shit and this is making this worse. And no we cannot get financial help from the government because my dads boss is a cunt and puts his tips as part of his pay check rather than tips so we make "too much" for assistance.

Anyway, we need help covering rent, getting food, my dad needs new glasses cause his broke and we need gas in the car. And I need some shorts for summer since I need to start walking for the sake of my health but we genuinely cannot stand the heat, it makes our depression worse we can't move, hell our bladder doesn't even work right when we get too hot. (We cannot afford to thrift right now either, but that is what we will be doing if this post actually works)

I'm trying to get some booths for craft fairs but they're either $300-$1,000 (I'm not exaggerating) or expect you to sign your soul over to them and almost all require you to have insurance which I also can't afford.

Our Ko-Fi is open for commissions. Currently, we have

Mushroom Boys - $20

Mushroom pops - $12

Mini Octopi - $5

Gummy Bear Plush - $10

Giant Heart Pillow - $200

Mystery Boxes - $25 $50 $100 $200 $500

Please if you can help, just please. If not Please spread it around. More stuff will be added once a week, next up are mini whales.

I don't know what to do man. This shit isn't worth it but my girlfriend is moving in in july which is the only thing keeping me going at this point.

[babacontainsmultitudes]

Folks, I come with important news from a dndads patreon monthly discord chat.

Anthony thinks Terry would crochet.

This has been a public service announcement, thank you.

[dailypokemoncrochet]

have you ever done guzzlord? sorry if you have and i just cant find it, tumblr's search function does not always work very well lol

Anon I assume this was a response to me asking What's an overly complicated pokemon? and you were sooo right. I spent 16 hours on this guy. (Guzzlord post)

Bonus Guzzlord closer up:

[ansitru]

Small crochet pet peeve: if I pay nearly €7 for a crochet pattern that is described as "confident beginner" (and I am an experienced crocheter), I should not have to look up Youtube videos of free, similar patterns, to make sense of flawed instructions and lacking photos.

Seriously.

[m0ose-idiot]

The little ones were so excited to find another ghost living in the adjacent field! Unfortunately Maddocks just found them all profoundly, profoundly annoying, bless him 👻🤍🦡

[imtrashraccoon]

I made more butterflies!

The first one was an experiment with colours, like the ones my friend @superbfirnacho used in some art for me.

The second was supposed to be an attempt to make a sort of monarch butterfly pattern but the black was too much. I still think it looks good but I'm going to try something different.

[bisexualbaker]

Crochet Pattern for Palestine and Israel Relief

At long last, it's done!

This crochet pattern is for small cats, of a good size to make into keychains, magnets, or even hair clips! There are six PDF versions available:

- US stitch names in 12 point Atkinson Hyperlegible - US stitch names in 22 point Atkinson Hyperlegible - US stitch names in 22 point Comic Sans

- UK stitch names in 12 point Atkinson Hyperlegible - UK stitch names in 22 point Atkinson Hyperlegible - UK stitch names in 22 point Comic Sans

Between those six options, that should cover most pattern accessibility needs. If you need something else, though, let me know! I'm prepared to offer a .doc or similar file on an individual basis if you need a screenreader to access crochet patterns, and have a sheet I can use to translate things to German stitch terms (though more in-depth instructions would still be in English). The pattern is worked primarily in (US) single crochet/(UK) double crochet, with the ears in (US) double crochet/(UK) treble crochet popcorn stitches, and is bundled with similar file options of a popcorn stitch tutorial PDF (no stitch names used).

"Socchan," you say, "These cats are super cute! And you said that this pattern is for charity? How does that work exactly?"

I'm glad you asked! Simply donate a minimum of $3 or close-enough local equivalent to a related charity, then take a screencap of your receipt/proof of donation. Block out any information that could doxx you; it's nice if you trust me, but it's not impossible that my email could get hacked, and I want you to be safe! Finally, email the altered screencap to socchan (at) protonmail (dot) com.

Once I get and check the screencap, I will email you back with a link to a MediaFire folder and the password you'll need to open the PDFs. Yes, it is a bit of a pain to need a password to open these files, but this was the simplest way I could figure out how to do things without needing to upload and send a minimum of six files to every person. Download as many of the variations as you want, keep a copy of the password somewhere safe (and don't delete the email with it), and go to town!

As a bonus, if you take your donation up to at least $5 (or close-enough local equivalent), I'll throw in an additional link and password for a very cute little flower pattern!

"That sounds pretty easy," you go on to say, "but where should I donate? There are so many options to choose from!"

No problem! Here's a couple of short lists of options that can help you narrow things down:

Palestine: Palestine Children's Relief Fund - Focuses on medical aid to children in Palestine Medical Aid for Palestine - "[H]elp MAP respond to the ongoing emergency in Gaza, as well as provide medical supplies, support healthcare services and deliver long term development to healthcare in the occupied Palestinian territory and Palestinian refugee camps in Lebanon." MAP reportedly has a team on the ground in Gaza, providing critical medical aid. Anera - Providing food, hygiene kits, and medical care in Gaza, the West Bank, and East Jerusalem. Palestine Red Crescent - More medical support in Palestine; the rest of the webpage is in Arabic, so be prepared if you want to click around at all. Basically the Palestinian Red Cross. Gaza Cemetery Project - "Al-Hamdulillah, a ​​5,500 square meters’ piece of land has been secured to create a public cemetery for the city and neighbouring areas." This area still needs a fence to protect the burial plots before it can be used.

Israel: Zaka - A group of first responders and people who identify bodies and prepare them for burial (sadly, sorely needed right now); they are in need of safety equipment, medical supplies, first aid kits, and more. Red Magen David - The Israeli/Jewish equivalent of the Red Cross; first responder medical support and similar. (This one has some pretty immediate upsetting text, so take care!) Hatzalah - Similar to Red Magen David, another first responder and emergency medical group. The Koby Mandell Foundation - Focuses on bereavement aid in Israel for people who have lost loved ones in traumatic circumstances; they've got support hotlines and can arrange for support visits, among other things. The Refuser Solidarity Network - Providing support for Israeli citizens who refuse government mandatory military service.

I think that's everything, aside from: Please Signal Boost! If I end up having to send out two hundred emails in the next couple of days, that still won't be too many.

[lonelyslutavatar]

I am in love with the idea of post-canon jmart just catching up with the stuff they missed from having a shitty childhood/spending their twenties stuck in a shitty job.

[gadzooksgalore]

Despite my consistent struggles with drawing, I picked up a new hobby this year in the form of crochet :> It's something I've wanted to learn for a long time and I'm pretty much addicted to it now. So mission accomplished, I guess!

This was my very first amigurumi attempt, and while the chunky yarn made the process a bit difficult, I think it was a good start! I've been learning a lot so that's what matters. Plus, the finished plushie is just so darn cute. I followed this tutorial to make this little stingray, if you'd like to make your own!

[skelecentral]

Day 6 of Bad Sansuary (hosted by @owl-bones!): Heavy

"WHY NOT??"

"because then you'd leave :("