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needcake · 1 year ago

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So today is the birthday of one of my favorite persons in this fandom and this life:

✨✨@oumaheroes / @rainbowfruitpastilles✨✨

(lovingly nicknamed Rains by yours truly back when we first starting talking because of eurovision, but who also goes by Ouma, Heroes and Fandom Grandma✨)

And to honor her and her incredible work I wanted to do something a little different this year! I've selected some of my favorite passages from her beautiful beautiful fics and I hope this makes you go insane and absolutely feral the way I know you like it 😌😚

From Earthbound, chapter 4:

Peter dreams that his legs reach down deep into the ocean, right to the sea bottom, and he watches the years pass silently by. Cast in metal and garbed in rust he falls, piece by piece, into an unforgiving sea. He dreams of rain, of smoking guns and angry curses, of abandonment and loneliness as he's left behind. He tosses and turns, unable to get comfortable, as wisps of memory lap gently against his consciousness. He dreams of a gruff voice mumbling soothing words after a nightmare, handmade toys and a warm calloused hand carding through his hair. Hot tea and biscuits in front of a fire. Bedtime stories and scratchy kisses. Of a man who loves him but who just doesn't know how to do it the way Peter needs. He wakes with dried tear tracks on his face and the ghost of a name on the tip of his tongue.

This fic is so incredibly beautiful, every character, every story. It brings you to this new and remade world that is fatally flawed, and as the characters slowly go back to their original Earth, their memories of their past lives and past selves come back like a punch, and the force of it just leaves us gasping. It's so powerful, so beautiful!! I absolutely adore it!!

---

From Lavender's Blue:

New officers are the worst, in Arthur’s personal opinion. They have this hopeful gleam about them that Arthur, world-weary as he is, cannot stand. Butter and milk fed children chasing honour and glory into hell itself, so blinded by it that they cannot see the dangers that litter the ground around them. They’re terribly young: nineteen, twenty, twenty-two. This and this alone causes Arthur to soften enough to answer them and he shakes himself back to the present where he doesn’t want to be, ‘Yes?’ ‘Come and play cards with us. We’ll deal you in.’ One of them breaks the deck expertly, a flick of his wrist and fingers sending the cards from one hand to another. Arthur can’t help but think of Gilbert doing the same thing sprawled across a sofa in Arthur’s parlour merely a few years ago, sleeve damp with rum where he’d spilt it. Too drunk to bloody well hold a glass of Arthur’s finest alcohol but hands always sharp enough for pretty tricks. Eyes clear despite it all, watching Arthur mischievously over Francis draped loose limbed in his lap. ‘No, thank you.’ Arthur straightens up and rolls his shoulders, feeling the knots and tension there under his coat. He’d been sitting too long. He’s due out on patrol soon and he checks his watch to assess the time.

I don't think I've told you enough how much I love this fic, the grittiness of it, the desperation, the idleness. You can almost see the men in the trenches, see the young officers playing cards to pass the time while they wait and Arthur's restlessness and anxiety. Absolutely flawless! ---

From Gold Filigree and Chainmail:

‘I’m not entirely vain.’ ‘We could have been doing many things today but instead we are here, admiring you.’ ‘We are not admiring me,’ France told him, coming up alongside, ‘Just my people and history. Which you can argue is me, but it is not really.’ England gestured at the painting with his head, ‘That’s you.’ The diner in question was in profile but it was easy enough to tell, from those who knew him well, that it was France himself. A habitual way of draping himself on a chair and the same loose, wavy hair as today. Half grin unchanged, a connection through time via the almost direct look at the painter through the fourth wall. He looked so much younger. France smiled fondly, ‘Ah, so it is.’

No one writes such delicious Fruk like you do!! You have such a hand handling these two together, you can take them from having a fight to talking about philosophy and love and it'll always be absolutely delicious and banter-y and iconic, and I'll always want to jump into the page and grab France by the hair and give him a good shake and kick England in the shin for good measure (but also lock them in a closet and throw away the key).

---

From Seen From The Other Side, chapter 1:

Their captain died last year. He died at their feet and now he turns and grins. Sees them staring, sees them know. Watches as they take him in, the horrifying, unholy miracle of it. Strong arms and broad shoulders, sharp white teeth in tanned skin. Blood in his heart and no hole near his neck. Ancient eyes that hold them there.

This entire series just makes me want to go ballistic!! I want to eat a hole in the concrete every time I read it because it's so good!! LOOK AT IT THAT'S SO GOOD!!!!!

---

From It's All About The Delivery, chapter 8:

‘Mr Williams, I did not and you are stepping way outta line here.’ ‘If you just look-‘ ‘No!’ his voice was far too loud- it rang out clear across the marble floors but the PM couldn’t help himself, an uncomfortable churning feeling inside his chest clouding all reason and logic, ‘I will not, Mr Williams. I’m doing so much already; I’m here in a manor in the middle of nowhere with a posh boy Lord who believes he’s the embodiment of dirt and I’m quite willing to go along with that to keep things smooth, but please, for the love of God, stop pushing me.’ ‘I do beg your pardon.’

The embodiment of dirt!!!!!!!! I laugh so hard every time I read that!! This entire fic makes me both want to give Matt little kisses and tuck him in at night and throw my laptop into the sun because Stephen is so STUBBORN (I adore Leigh though, we can keep her). It's the perfect mix of politics, family affairs, work relationships, interpersonal relationships, PMs that are too dumb to be alive, glorious jokes and little genuine heartfelt moments that just make me weep with joy!! Absolutely perfect!!!

---

From Reset, chapter 8:

They fell silent, remaining pressed together tightly until England had stopped shaking. 'I was supposed to have Reset.' He said, voice distant and quiet as if he were speaking more to himself than to anyone in particular. France was almost about to fall back asleep again, but became alert instantly, 'What?' 'I'm due one, it seems.' France racked his brain, struggling to try and think of the last time England had had his stint at being human. 1800s? No wait, before that... it couldn't have been anywhere around the 1600s, he'd been too busy starting to pillage and conquer to allow himself to enjoy a mortal existence. Late in the 1700s then, perhaps? 'We're all probably due one,' England continued, 'so much has changed even in the last hundred years that we're all a bit out of touch- Francis' lifespan being one example.' 'How could you tell that you...' France floundered, 'why do you think that?' France felt England give a small shrug, 'I know it was time; it was very hard to stay, I guess. You're dead but still there, but this time I had to actually think about staying.' He ran out of words, language not really enough to describe what he intrinsically knew. 'I knew it wouldn't be a good idea though, not right now.' France huffed. 'Well no. I, for one, would have to deal with your government and also reintroducing myself to mine, whilst at the same time being embroiled in a murder inquiry.' 'Don't forget that someone is still trying to kill you.' 'Oh yes, that too. How could I have let that slip my mind.' England chuckled and then coughed, lungs not quite ready. France helped him sit up a bit higher and rubbed his back, 'This isn't something we need right now. One more hit on you and it'll be even harder to fix this mess if you actually stay dead.' England continued to cough and try to wrangle his breathing back under control, but shook his head. France tutted in annoyance. 'I doubt that you'll be able to put it off for long, it's not something that you can simply avoid.' He sighed and leant back against the tree. The gap between them had filled very quickly with cold air, and once he stopped struggling to breathe France pulled England back down again and covered them both back up. 'This is going to make things a whole lot more difficult, you know.' 'Dreadfully sorry.' England did not sound in any way sorry. 'Next time I'll just die better, shall I?' France gave him a smiling kiss to the temple, 'You could always learn to die better, you are never very pretty when you do.' England elbowed him in the gut and leant hard against him on purpose. 'I cannot wait to not have to see your face again after this.' France huffed at him. 'You would miss my shining example of poise, culture and beauty before too long.' 'Would not.' 'Oh! Think of how boring your life would be without me to enhance it, for example, consider that nice long holiday we'll go on after all of this blows over. Southern France, by the beach and in the sun...' 'You can sod off, I'm going home.' 'Back to your rainy lump in the sea, of course my dear. I shall not join you.' 'Thank fuck for that.'

DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN WHEN I SAY YOU ARE A MASTERMIND WRITING WITH THEM??? I love to see it!!!! I read this with the biggest grin because every dialogue just jumps out of the page and they are both so alive!!! I absolutely love it!! I love the plot, I love the idea of Reset for them, I love the execution, the humor, the romance, the love!!!! I love it!!!!!!!

--- And to close this humble offering on this very special day, I hope you have the most wonderful day today, my dear, and that we can share many many birthdays and eurovisions and stories together for many many years to come!! I love you and I hope you all the best in this entire world!!! 💖💖💖💖💖💖

#rainbowfruitpastilles #oumaheroes #hetalia #fic recs #fruk #hws england #hws france #hws sealand #HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAINS!!!!!!!#🥳🥳🥳

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princess-unipeg · 2 years ago

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I got around this watching the series finale today. I didn’t feel like watching it as soon as the official Disney Channel YouTube channel posted the episode. It was overcome with a lot of feels and I wanted to spend my Easter eating candy and watching funny feel good easter specials. It felt overwhelming enough watching some of the tidbits with a belly full of sweets. Anyway for the amount we got, I thought the last episode was grand.

My only real gripe about it was the complete absence of Caleb and his witch wife Evelyn. Their love story set in motion of Belos and his grip on the Boiling Isles. No flashback, no discovery by our main characters and no one who was there to tell their story to our heroes. I want to see confirmation of Evelyn being a Clawthorne ancestor. Hopefully Disney will grant the show some supplementary tie-in books to grant us the information not provided by the show like they did with Amphibia with Marcy’s journal.

Anyway I got some theories right and wrong about the finale. I was right that Luz would be granted a temporary power-up. That form of her looks awesome and I can’t wait for the cosplay.

I was also right Luz would have her obligatory ��sorry my sacrifice means you’ll lose me” scene albeit with an actual death. I at least got it right that the Titan themself would be the one to revive Luz. Though Luz died before her power up which I didn’t expect. The ones who witnessed her death was Belos, The Collector, King and Eda. The rest merely felt her death with the glowing lights. Thankfully it was only Eda and King since right after they went absolutely feral on Belos. The rest of her friends and family wouldn’t have survived had they known and just charged at Belos without thinking. Still I hope Luz showed off her form either in drawings or her memory pictures.

The Titan was not what I expected when they appeared. Looked more like a dad lounging for the weekend rather then a god of grand elegance. Though the confirmation of being bigender does explain how he laid that egg by himself. The Titan did eventually became more godlike after sending Luz back though.

As it turns out he did feel bad that he chose to lock the Collector away. I can only imagine what it was like for his soul to be trapped in the InBetween dimension and being alive enough to feel the pain. At least he had the comfort of knowing King was being treated well and being loved by his found family. It’s sad though that he couldn’t relay his first and last dad joke to King in person. The Titan being dead dead meant the glyphs that Luz took the entire series to learn stopped working. Which means she can no longer “speak to him” so to speak.

It was nice to see everyone reunite with their families for real and see Hunter realize he’s had family in the Boiling Isles all along. Especially when Camilla outright accepts Eda and King as family.

It was great that The Collector was reformed thanks to Eda, King and Luz’s friendship. The millennium years old child was able to learn empathy for the first time and through his efforts everyone on the Boiling Isles was spared. Too bad The Collector had to go so soon. But considering the most of the Boiling Isles had suffered their playtime, it was for the best that he keeps his distance. Though they get to have The Owl House to visit every time they need a break from being in the stars. With Francois keeping them company in the meantime.

With the Titan now in a different position most of the landscape in Bonesborough has shifted which means having to rebuild everything from scratch. Though the environment and surrounding nature was revived thanks to Luz’s Titan magic.

Eda and Lilith are still cursed but from the looks of it they made peace. It hasn’t hindered their lives and only flourished now that Belos is no more.

The prediction I was definitely wrong on was the fact that Luz needed King’s blood to make a new portal door. Turns out The Collector gave them a new portal door for them to use. Though I was glad that the theory that Luz doesn’t have to leave the Boiling Isles behind turned out to be true!

You know with the fact that Luz spoke to the Titan personally and was blessed with his magic, it did make me wonder if during the timeskip Luz was revered as the “chosen one” like she’s alway wished to be? I mean the citizens of the Boiling Isles had to have someone to follow with Belos gone and their homeland shifted. She probably was their ruler temporarily but she needed to get back to her own life back on earth and only took charge of the rebuilding and left the rest to the more experienced adults.

I’m overall glad to see everyone get their redemptions/happily ever afters after everything. This was my say on the series finale.

#my post #my posts #the owl house #disney the owl house #disneys the owl house #disney’s the owl house #the owl house series finale #series finale #thoughts #my thoughts

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satanicspinosaurus · 1 year ago

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>Octavia and Gale get a little close, tell each other some things about themselves.

O.o

>Not even in Octavia's childhood celebrating her hero ancestor

>sees the statue of Tav, her great grandmother.

DAMN. That’s, uh, gotta be a thing. Also now I get to know more about Gale.

>his ancestor Gale

I love the idea that Gale is so nerdy either he has made a million little nerds or he’s popped back in for round 2. I don’t care which one, because either is delicious in its own way.

>"Incredible! You somehow always have a trick up your sleeve don't you? Oh I cannot wait to tell Astarion!"

:) He’s so happy.

>I don't know if you realize by how little I mention it, or by how quietly I just told you in a gigantic party, but I'm not exactly one to advertise my family lineage.

Damn, girl be setting boundariiiiiiiies! <3

>She was on her third different way of wording the same answer

The worst. Absolutely horrible when this happens. Octavia should get to kill (1) person for free because of this.

>gross tasting champagne

I don’t drink. I should mention that. Isn’t champagne one of easier ones to drink? Idk. This feels weird? (Or I know nothing about alcohol, either way!)

>He strolls up from behind Octavia and dumps the champagne into a topiary planter.

That can’t be good for the plant.

>Don't know how many times I was approached by the same Drow woman

So did Araj get run through the spin cycle too?

>Seems hard.

Thank you! DnD focuses on adventures, but they are kind of weirdos! Most people aren’t running through dungeons and shit because farming’s hard enough. We don’t need to add monsters to the mix.

>They're the elites who came up after all the shit everyone else cleaned up.

Oooooh, interesting. Usually worlds get calmer as they go, so yeah Astarion having helped make things easier would probably affect how he views people today.

>Somehow this seemed like what he needed right now.

Ahhh, yes. Many years later, Astarion is still a feral cat and she’s just letting him come at his pace. 🙂

>his ears wiggled a little

Elf ears should be able to wiggle. @ Me I don’t care. This is good and I like it.

>"I thought I saw 'starion here with you..?"

So he’s drunk, yes?

>I haven't seen him all night! He's always moving around in the shadows like some sort of-"

Finish that thought, gale. Finish it. >Astarion comes out and interrupts Gale OH GOOD, he’s still a shit

>"She told me that she knows stuff! Like...real good stuff..."

Gale. Sad. No. I get info dumping is great, but no. Octavia said no.

>before he could finish, Octavia jerks him back, his whole body turning into rubber, pulling them down onto the floor

GOOD

>Octavia seizes the opportunity to shut him up, go home, and end this whole night all at the same time.

>Astarion lets out a scandalous laugh "Oh I see how it is...good for you Gale"

WOW. So I did NOT see that coming!

>"Oh no dearest, don't worry, I'm not jealous of the walking encyclopedia.

Said like a man who has to have thought about this a few times, lol. For real though, elves recycle souls. They probably don’t always pair up again, so that’s uh….got to be something. >Yeah, let's go Gale.

DAMN CLIFF HANGER! I cannot wait to hear more about Octavia’s motivations here

Memories of Us Chapter 6

Chapters: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |

Summary: It's party time bitches. Octavia and Gale get a little close, tell each other some things about themselves. Gross wine is involved.

Inspired by @cheesy-cryptid 's fan art that took root in my mind and continues to do so.

As always I want to give credits to my best friend @micropoe10 for reading this and helping me come up with stuff. You're the best babe 😘

Tag list: (as always thanks to those who asked to be tagged! If you'd like to join, let me know!)

@justporo @satanicspinosaurus @sleepy-timaeus @tragedybunny @davenswitcher @wayward-hel

Chapter 6

maybe you and me

Inside the museum, the crowd is evergrowing. Hundreds of people are flooding the main atrium. Not even in Octavia's childhood celebrating her hero ancestor had she seen this many people in one place. She and Gale keep walking linked arm in arm, as they step through the convention she sees the statue of Tav, her great grandmother. She feels like now is the perfect time to tell Gale.

"Uh...Gale?" She tugs a little at his sleeve, he turns to look at her quizzically. "Everything okay?" He asks, she nods reassuringly " I have something to tell you and I don't want you to freak out or anything..." She looks over at the statue and begins telling him about her childhood.

The stories her grandmother would tell her about the hero matriarch of their family, the adventures that were had with his ancestor Gale of Waterdeep, the grand wizard who also saved this town. The trials they had through with the Gith, the Sharran turned Selunite, the Tiefling with the heart of iron, and the Blade of Frontiers.

The whole story fascinated Gale and he couldn't believe that she knew what he had grown up with, to be one of the line of people they came from was no easy task. "Incredible! You somehow always have a trick up your sleeve don't you? Oh I cannot wait to tell Astarion!" His eyes are alight with renewal behind them. He shakes his head and holds on to both of Octavia's hands. "You are the key. You are the one who could help, this is why he gave you the damn book! How? How the hells did he even know?!"

Octavia's brows shot up and a cold worry quickly filled her. "He doesn't know. I don't know if you realize by how little I mention it, or by how quietly I just told you in a gigantic party, but I'm not exactly one to advertise my family lineage. People tend to get weird about it.." She slowly drops her hands out of Gale's. "I would appreciate it if we didn't tell him...not yet." She swallows nervously, "Maybe after this whole painting business is done?"

She smiles wryly and takes a pair of drinks from a tray carrying waiter passing by. "Let's just take a note from his book tonight? What does he say? 'Live a little, daaahling'." She ends with a bad impersonation of Astarion, hands Gale the glass and they clink glasses; he shakes his head with a smile and drinks.

—-------------------

It had been roughly two hours since she and Gale were separated by the guests who had a million questions about the new exhibit. She was on her third different way of wording the same answer to a halfling who kept making it very clear that their family was one of the many donors to this museum. She laughs and nods, appeasing them and excusing herself. She finds an open door to the outer balcony and swiftly walks towards it.

Thankfully there was another drink table next to it, she grabs a flight of what looks like sparkling water and quickly drinks it. To her distaste, it was more of that gross tasting champagne. As she comes out onto the balcony, she wriggles as the bubbles shoot down her throat, the sensation causing her to make an audible groan.

"Isn't it just awful? I pay for the best but get this vinegar in a champagne bottle. How utterly disappointing." Of course, as if on cue, Astarion makes his appearance. He strolls up from behind Octavia and dumps the champagne into a topiary planter. He's dressed in the most immaculate outfit she has ever seen him wear.

Black from top to bottom, his shirt was opened and his chest exposed to the moonlight, very fitted pants, and a hint of red in the lining of his jacket. His eyes are covered by his glasses, Octavia was hoping he wouldn't wear them tonight but she doesn't bring it up.

Astarion takes a red handkerchief from his coat pocket and wipes his lips in one fluid motion. "Good evening to you too, Astarion. I take it you're having a good night? Well aside from the drinks." Octavia giggles and leans back on the edge of the enclosure, her hands resting on the wall.

"I would if these people would stop making me repeat myself. Don't know how many times I was approached by the same Drow woman asking me idiotic questions about the other exhibits. Thank the Gods she got pulled away by an hors d'oeuvres tray passing by. I made my dashing escape afterwards. What about you, darling? Are you finally enjoying yourself?" He stands next to her, facing out towards the city.

"Yes, somewhat. I mean I'm right there with you about the cycle of questioning. Other than that it's been..." she pauses, looking down "it's been fine. Like I said before, I'm more of a 'work silently in the background' type. So for me to be here, under all this attention...it's intimidating. I'm just not used to it." Her lips upturn slightly, she plays with the hem of the sleeve hanging off her shoulder. "I'm sorry if that's not the answer you were looking for."

She huffs and turns her body to look out. "Growing up here, you learn a lot of things, fantastical adventures, death defying actions to save the world, magic and gods, demons, mind flayers....honestly I'm glad I didn't have to do all of that. Seems hard." She bends a little and places her elbows on the edge of the wall, there she tucks her hands under her chin.

Astarion looks down at her, his brows somewhat knitted together, a small frown on his face. "Darling, it's one thing to read about it, doing it is a completely different story." He turns to his right, looking into the patrons inside the atrium. "Those people in there would never get it. They're the elites who came up after all the shit everyone else cleaned up. They weren't the ones knee deep in it for who knows how long. Sleeping in dirt, chasing monsters, killing whomever or whatever tried to kill you first. It's exhausting."

He spoke like someone who had first hand experience with this, the way he seethed through the whole speech. Octavia sensed there was something else behind that anger, but this was not the time to pry more. She turns to him, standing close under the evening stars, she places her hand on his. Somehow this seemed like what he needed right now.

Astarion tenses a little, but Octavia can feel him relax soon after. From the corner of her eye she could swear a small smile cracked in the corner of his mouth and his ears wiggled a little. There was a small huff behind it, followed by Astarion clearing his throat. They stand there in the silence, staring out at the lights glittering in the veil of the night.

"OCTAVIA!!! FINALLY I FOUND YOU!!!" Gale comes stumbling through the door, his jacket is undone and the drink in his hand is swirling wildly with his movements. "I have been..looking EVERYWHERE for you!!!" She and Astarion break their contact, startled, and she walks towards Gale catching him in her arms. Astarion instantly disappears into the shadows. "I thought I saw 'starion here with you..?"

Gale slurs a bit, his breath smelling like the champagne that Astarion had criticized earlier. "Oh no, I was here alone. Maybe it was one of the waiters they've got wandering around?" She holds up her glass, giving him a slight smile. She links her arm with his and sits down on the bench in front of them. "Why? Were you looking for him for any particular reason?"

Gale enthusiastically nods, his whole body shaking in return. "Yes! I wanted to talk to him!! I haven't seen him all night! He's always moving around in the shadows like some sort of-" "Is there something you wish to talk about, my dear Gale? I just walked past and heard you mention me?" Astarion comes out and interrupts Gale, he walks towards the pair, and he crosses his arms and legs on the wall in front of them. "YES! I..was thinking about that book!"

Octavia quietly gasps, her whole body turning cold in an instant. Whether it was from the lack of covering on her shoulders and arms, or the fear of Gale's drunk inhibitions outing her in front of Astarion "Octavia here..." He continues, "She told me that she knows stuff! Like...real good stuff..." He leans back some, his body fully consumed by the alcohol pulling her down a little. "She was telling me..uh that she's-" before he could finish, Octavia jerks him back, his whole body turning into rubber, pulling them down onto the floor.

She lands on top of him, her arms on his chest, his wrapped around her. "Hi. I forgot what I was talking about." His face full of a drunken blush now turns into a whole body flush. Octavia seizes the opportunity to shut him up, go home, and end this whole night all at the same time.

She pulls Gale up to her and kisses him, the taste of the bitter alcohol filling her mouth. She feels his arms squeeze her down a little and he leans into it some. She pulls away instantly and Astarion lets out a scandalous laugh "Oh I see how it is...good for you Gale"

Octavia gets off, rolling onto her legs and turns up at Astarion. She puts on a somewhat convincing drunk voice, "Sorry, he pulled me down and I...I guess I just couldn't help myself?" Astarion laughs more, extending his hand to help her up, "Oh no dearest, don't worry, I'm not jealous of the walking encyclopedia. I'm happy for you, really. You should probably take him home, seems like he's had a little too much fun for one night, hmm?"

Astarion laughs and helps Octavia pull Gale up, he sways softly as he catches himself. "But..." He pouts, Astarion pats his back and straightens him up more. "Gale, whatever it is you can always tell me later. There are more pressing matters that I feel you should attend to..." He motions his head towards Octavia, she could feel the salacious glare behind the lenses he wore and it made her face go warm. "Yeah, let's go Gale."

#also can't wait to see who gets mad

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lalunanymph · 3 years ago

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exhibition w kaku where he's talking on the phone with the haitanis and u suck him off under the table and he's having a hard time forming words bcos your game too good 😭

EYES ON ME — KAKUCHO

cw. oral (m! receiving), blushy bois that turn feral, cucking (ish), dirty talk, daddy kink, mentions of a breeding kink, ran tries to humiliate kakucho but reader is a real one, degradation, voyuerism, tit job, mild exhibitionism, nipple play, cockwarming

“—and we would have to provide the firearms for the—“

kakucho’s face on the screen pauses, and the other executives wait for him to respond. through the small square, ran studies how he bit his lip, shaking his head slightly side to side as if to dispel a harried thought.

“s-sorry,” he clears his throat, a light blush forming on his cheeks.

on the other end of the screen, underneath the luxurious l-shaped desk that housed bonten’s most important documents, you swirl your tongue over his weeping slit and pause in your ministrations.

kakucho makes the mistake of flitting his gorgeous dual-colored eyes down to where you’re kneeling between his spread thighs, and his blush deepens.

“if i didn’t know any better,” ran’s drawl catches his attention from the sinful sight spread beneath him. “i would think you’re getting some good ol’ head underneath that damn desk.”

as much as he wants to sock ran in the face for his sleazy words, he can’t dispute nor confirm them.

in hindsight, if he wasn’t so busy with his work, your poor husband wouldn’t have been punished by your slick mouth or velvet tongue lapping at his balls.

wouldn’t have to endure the sight of you curling your fingers into your warm and wet heat, or the way your tits strain against the see-through blouse you had worn which led him into this mess in the first place.

for the first time in his life, the dark-haired man curses how advanced technology is and wishes this meeting was done face-to-face so he wouldn’t have to be subjected to your torment.

but mikey’s wife had an emergency today and he needed to stay home which resulted in your absolute joy at having him back for the first time in days.

how could he tell you—his sweet, beautiful and patient wife no—when with just one bat of your eyelashes, you had convinced him to let you suck him off under the desk while japan’s most dangerous organization discussed how to take down a prickly firearms dealer?

a fucking witch, that’s what you are. you have him all wrapped up in your pretty french-tipped finger and you weren’t even aware of it.

kakucho narrows his eyes at the older haitani. a second too late in responding to his teasing. “i’m n-not.”

barely even convincing when his voice faltered. ran’s grin widened. below the table, you tongue at his balls, leaving a strip of saliva on his slick length only to nuzzle your cheek on the pulsing red tip, smearing his pre cum all over your teasing grin.

kakucho bit down on a whimper.

mikey blinks. “if you have unfinished business with your wife, i suggest you get it over with and not disrupt this meeting.”

mustering his strength after being called out by the head of bonten himself, kakucho sinks his fingers in your hair, holding you back and nodding firmly into the camera.

“i’m not feeling a little too well today but we can still continue on.” lying through his teeth while your tongue dances over his sticky tip. his grip goes lax and you move back onto his cock with an eagerness that would’ve made him proud if takeomi didn’t start talking about the history of trade wars between two warring gangs in tokyo.

he wasn’t even listening—mesmerized by the sight of your plush lips stretched around his aching length. how they were glossy from the combination of your favorite cherry balm, spit, and his precum. tenderly, he swipes a bit of drool from your chin, and you hum, repaying his kindness by taking him down your whole throat.

kakucho would’ve jumped out of his skin and yelled if he wasn’t quick enough to switch off the camera.

panting, his colleagues become a distant memory; lust warring with common sense to come out on top. the blood rushing through his ears drowns out any last shred of rationale.

that and the soft flesh of your tits bouncing after being released from the confines of your skimpy blouse had something to do with his sudden speechlessness. his jaw goes slack when you wedge his cock in between the valley of your plush fat, jerking him off with your sweet tits. placing a kiss on the flushed and angry red tip whenever it got close to your lips. a whimper slips past his gritted teeth and kakucho lays his head back.

he doesn’t even notice when the call has gone silent.

how could he when he could barely focus only on the slurping sounds of your mouth sinking over and over again on his cock?

you dribble a globe of spit on his aching tip and his cheeks heat up, those beautiful dual-hued eyes at half-mast studying you intently.

kakucho’s head lolls to the side, soft pants escaping his pretty mouth.

“eyes on me, daddy,” you murmur, and his breathing hitch. “want you to watch me taking your cock.”

at your words, you clamber onto his lap, smiling sweetly despite your devious motions of fisting his length and running his tip through your folds. kakucho desperately slams his lips on yours, and you love how he was slowly unraveling under you.

the power it gave you to see your usual stoic husband losing it was heady—leaving you lightheaded.

to finally ease the ache in your cunt, you plant your hands on his shoulders, sinking down onto his throbbing cock.

“ohh ffuccckkk,” kakucho hisses, eyes falling completely close at the sensation of your velvet walls melting around his length. from his attached microphone, someone groans.

his eyes snap wide open, trying to stop you from swiveling your hips, but you were too far gone. sweet whimpers and your needy hands burying in his hair, you push his his face in between your tits and your whines were unmistakable to the men who were listening in.

heavy breaths and the clinking of belts slipping off tented pants; the rest of the men were enjoying your little show.

“daddy, daddy, please,” your whimpers join the cacophony of shuddered breaths coming from his earpiece.

“begging like a bitch in heat.” ran’s voice on the other hand.

“bet she’s creaming, too.” rindou’s observation prompts him to look between your joint bodies. the rings of white on the base of his cock have him immobilized, unable to even stop this from happening. your tongue slips into his mouth, and your hips stutter over his cock.

takeomi clicks his tongue and sanzu jeers. “don’t act like you ain’t enjoying this, old man.”

to his surprise and mortification, mikey chuckles from the other end of the line. “never would’ve pinned kaku-chan for someone who shares his wife.”

at the expense of the youngest bonten member’s pride, the older men made comments on your body; how you would scream under each of them and how they would teach you a lesson to put you back in your place. his anger was igniting, the ugly monster rearing its head and he snarls, lifting you from his lap to slam you down onto the desk.

your squeaks alert the other members, and he doesn’t offer an explanation, taking out one wireless bud and placing it in your left ear for you both to share the mic.

“k-kaku—”

“say hi to the boys, love.”

your eyes widen like saucers, and you don’t have time to voice out your surprise, his cock already ramming into you at a punishing pace.

“fuck!”

a snicker. “damn. bet her little pussy was not prepared for that.”

you could hardly believe this. kakucho was insane. he wasn’t himself, as evident from how he was plowing into you, barely caring that you were scratching his back, a silent reprieve for him to slow down. what could’ve made your taciturn and level-headed husband this unhinged?

you found the reason for his outlandish behavior soon enough.

“don’t pretend like his cock is enough, doll,” ran drawls. “i know you’re keening ‘cause you want us, too.”

your head was pulsing, and you were not in control of your barely concealed anger when you whisper, “you’re wrong.”

silence resounds from the usually cocky executive.

moaning in a way that would make even a pornstar blush, you cry out, “daddy! god—fuck, love your cock, daddy!” panting, you twine your fingers in his midnight blue hair, forcing him to look into your eyes as you swirl your hips. wanting to mean every single word you say to him.

palm on your belly, you hiccup, “can f-feel you so deep in me, s’like your cock was meant for me—you’re so big. so so big i—ah!”

kakucho, emboldened by your responses, grins and leans forward to place a sloppy kiss on your parted lips; his tongue dips into your mouth and samples your sweet whimpers.

“yeah? like my cock? say it,” he growls. “say ‘i love daddy’s big cock’.”

“i love daddy’s big cock,” you wail, watery eyes locking on his glossy ones. “i love my daddy’s big cock!”

the thought of the rest of the executives on the other end completely slips your mind. you rub tight circles on your throbbing clit as your husband pounds into you from above, his delectable deep tones urging you to spill your orgasm for him.

“give it to me, pretty.” you were never one to find begging attractive, but when your husband did it? you creamed even more. “give me your cum and i’ll give you mine. my pretty, pretty baby. my love, my y/n. fuck i know you can give it to me good so do it now, b-baby, oh—fuck...”

“s’all yours,” you whine pathetically, tears dribbling down your face. “pussy all yours, daddy. all yours. made just for you, kakucho.”

he grazes his lips with yours, so lost in the sensation of your sweet cunt clamping down on him. “yeah? all mine, huh? that’s right. this is my pussy, my fucking property—ah, fuck—g-gonna—”

kakucho stutters, watching with rapt zeal as you play with your clit and nipples while he continues to fuck into your creamy mess. that sight alone was worth more than a hundred lame lap dances his comrades received. easily beating out the best porn on the internet because this was you.

his perfect wife. the love of his life. the one whose soul, body, and mind was made for him.

white explodes behind his eyes and he surges into you with one hard thrust, stilling to spill his cum deep in you.

your body twitches; lost in the throes of this shared orgasm. “that’s it daddy, god give me your cum, love it when you paint me all white and pretty with it, want your babies please, please—love you, love you daddy.”

kakucho melts into you, kissing you softly on the cheek and temple.

a cough resounds on the other end and he’s genuinely surprised that the rest of bonten were still on the call.

“that was... interesting,” he could picture kokonoi’s leer.

someone sighs. “god me when?”

sanzu giggles. “maybe in your next life, old man.”

an awkward throat clearing. “so. should we continue on with the meeting?” ran’s surly tone would’ve made him laugh if mikey’s next words didn’t leave him reeling with disbelief.

“you boys go ahead. i have some... stuff... to discuss with my wife.”

the ‘stuff’ is evident when mikey’s call disengages and so does his phone. a tell tale sign he was spending—ahem, quality time—with his own wife.

how easily these women turned the fearsome bonten men into putty.

kakucho gives you a fond smile and brings you into his arms, sinking back into the office chair and grabbing a blanket to wrap around your shoulders. you were already dozing off, content to warm his cock, nestling your face in the crook of his neck.

you flinch slightly when he leans forward to give you a kiss on the forehead, shaky from the overstimulation.

not even caring that you were astride on his lap, he took the stray bud back from you and stuck it into his other ear, pushing back his tousled hair. switching his camera back on, he was met by five incredulous faces, all staring at his reddened cheeks and the half-naked woman asleep in his arms.

kakucho tries hard not to smirk, face perfectly composed. eat your hearts out, you bastards; y/n is mine and mine alone.

as if he didn’t just fuck his wife’s brains out in front of his colleagues, kakucho clears his throat and continues on like nothing has happen.

“as i was saying, we would have to provide the firearms through a secret distribution channel that i managed to hack...”

a/n. COMBUSTING. he’s so sexy when he’s feral i love him so much ;__;

#kakucho thirst #tokyo revengers thirst #tokrev smut #kakucho x you #kakucho smut #bonten kakucho #bonten smut #thick dick daddy kakucho strikes again #thirsty thots 🥃#🦢 writes

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gale-gentlepenguin · 2 years ago

Text

Gale Reviews: ML Season 5 episode 5 Illusion

(Spoilers below)

-XY is me. I’m sick and confused by all the name changes

-MR. BANANA is an expert. But considering Bob roth is considered one too… He might be overqualified.

-Glad Alex is keeping the wigs

-Alex went from Simon to Paula in one season (for those that get that reference.)

-As always Mr.Banana is known for his Expert opinion. Truly the intellectual Paris needs at this time

-Plagg having fun with the alliance ring. Adrien being annoyed that he is an NFT

-I just realized how TERRIFYING this actually is for Adrien. He Litterally has no control of his image and voice. Before he was tricked in his ads, now… yikes my dude

-Adrien sounds so shocked that his father wants to see him in the kitchen

-I will say this, Adrien’s horror and confusion over seeing his father is the reaction I had in passion. I too would be very confused.

-Adrien right now

- Gabriel is so f***ing manipulative. My dude like I can’t.

-The only genuine emotion seems to be when he got burned

- Gabriel is actually really good at manipulation. If I didn’t watch the last 4 seasons I’d almost believe he’s trying to be genuine

-Alya’s theory about Fetch being used makes sense. We know better but it’s a nice idea.

-Nino being left out again. Pass my boy a bone please

-THE RESISTANCE! Nino my guy. I love you dearly. He planning a resistance group

-COMRADE MAYO! Adrien being the token White guy. I love it. Also @xhanisai probably frothing with joy over this

- Nino is shocked that Adrien can have lunch with them. I agree

-Baby boy never been to a cafeteria. That’s adorable.

-DAMN ADRIEN, you gonna kill that girl with your kindness

-Nino, can you give the boy one day to have lunch like normal?

-Nino being an absolute dork and I love it.

-Wait beurre Maître d’hotel (Butter hotel supervisor?) I think he meant butter. XD

-Chloé’s speed is super human

-Nino outted Alya and him to Adrien and Marinette (hilariously they both know)

-Alya is like wtf?

-Nino has a point

- Marinette is mortified tho

-Nino telling them Adrien knew, and Adrien being awkward

-Nino is taking Ls today

-oh and there’s Lila

-Marinette being feral protective

-Nino committing to the bit

-Lila posting social media pics of Adrien. That’s… so like her

-Damn, Nino picked up on the powers thing. He did that BY HIMSELF! Points for Nino. Respect the hustle

-Nino’s plan makes sense tho. But it is a dick move.

-Comrade Béchamel? Cool name

-Adrien really can’t have nice things

-Nino has a conspiracy board. Also I see Alya is rubbing off on him

-Nino is completely right. It is a stunt, but Adrien wants to believe it isn’t

-Nino realizing he went too far. That’s a good friend for apologizing

-And Lila overheard it and is probably gonna tattle

-I did like that quick exchange. Gabriel keeping his cool. But now he knows

-Gabriel acting like a parent… it’s so wrong

-And here comes the plan

-They had Marinette be the klutz. Did they seriously do the PIZZA BIT?!

-All over his White suit. Damn

-But no reaction. To be fair, He was expecting it. But only Marinette’s clumsy is experience

-Adrien… baby boy looks so awkward.

-Walks in, just Pastas his dad. Like not even making it look like an accident

-Now it’s Alya’s turn. I’m embarassed for all of them. Like Marinette could get away with it, because… it’s such a Marinette thing.

-Alya doesn’t even try hiding it. She’s like “this is dumb, yeet” no emotion

-I’m getting such squidward vibes.

-OH S*** He’s taking Adrien out of school. And for once… I can completely understand why. (The dietary food but was HILARIOUS tho)

-Nino went too far, I feel like Adrien is gonna be akumatized more than Gabe.

-Oh… Adrien can’t catch a break

-AND IT WAS A BIT! Gabriel you SOB

-GABRIEL YOU F***ing bastard! I hate and love how brilliant this is. It’s like Collector but crueler

-The plan worked… but it didn’t. Clever bastard

-WHY CAN WE SEE HIS EYES!

-So the bit allowing him to vanish is teleportation.

-Comrade Ketchup. Nino commits to a bit

-Monarch REALLY being petty

-Pollen, Nooroo and Kaalki… oh dear…

-AND CHICKEN! Noooo

-The rings make it so he doesn’t get I’ll from the effects!? Boooo

-he can use Sublimation to make himself INVISIBLE! Omg!

-“Grated Cheese?” “Plagg would be happy?”

-clever move monarch

-BUT NOT CLEVER ENOUGH!

-DEFEATED BY RATS! Amazing

-Dude just faked falling into the sewer.

-So pro, cool strategy, con beaten by sewer rats… I’ll say he broke even

-Magic lightning bolt? Nino honey… no

-But they did get to appologize to Gabriel but… Gabriel being manipulative

-COMRADE TARTER SAUCE. As funny as this is, this now makes the resistance useless.

-Gabriel you manipulative bastard

-This heartwarming scene brought to you by the letter M. FOR MANIPULATIVE F***!!!

-Nino added more sauces

-And Lila… now it’s detrimental

-Comrade sweet and sour oh! Cause she is TWOFACED. Clever 🙄

-And Tomoe is in on this but maybe more than we know

____________________________________________

8/10

I think it’s solid. It has some cringe but I thought the plans were clever. Nino showing how Alya has rubbed off on him is interesting. Though I swear Gabriel’s kindness is F***ing disturbing. And I’m loving it. Gabriel now is starting to feel more like a villain to me.

Adrien also getting some freedom is nice.

But it’s all fake. An illusion.

I am intrigued

#miraculous ladybug #gale reviews #ml #ml spoilers #ml illusion #ml illusion spoikers #adrien agreste #nino lahiffe #marinette dupain cheng #alya cesaire

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rebeccccccaaa · 4 years ago

Text

𝔻𝕒𝕚𝕤𝕚𝕖𝕤

___________________

ʙᴜᴄᴋʏ ʙᴀʀɴᴇs x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: Bucky gets hit with that god awful (but really hot) sex pollen. (this was requested)

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: Dub-Con/Non-Con as per usual with sex pollens fics (although i try to write them as consensual as possible :T) Smut obvi (18+ minors dni), slight daddy kink, age gap?, public male masturbation; it's brief but still

TW: very brief mention of possible suicide

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ's ɴᴏᴛᴇs: hot

____________________

“Where are those daisies we collected from the last mission?” Tony asked you, eyes staying glued to the hologram in front of him.

“I left them on the quinjet. Fury said to wait for transportation until Shield confirms safety. It’s literally in a glass case, but whatever,” you rolled your eyes, making the older man laugh.

“Just protocol, kid,” he snickered.

Meanwhile Bucky sat with Steve eating lunch, chatting it up like old men do.

“So what did you bring back from the last mission? I saw a bunch of agents in hazmat suits,” Steve said sipping his coffee.

“Uh, well Thor said we should bring some plants back for research, but it seems like a bunch of normal lookin’ daisies,” Bucky shrugged.

“Y/n loves daisies,” Steve smirked.

“Ok?”

“And you love Y/n,” Steve teased.

“No I don’t-”

“Hey boys!” you skipped past the kitchen.

“Y/n,” Bucky said standing up with a big goofy smile on his face.

“Where ‘ya going?” Steve asked with a chuckle.

“Quinjet. Fury gave us the go to start doing tests on that plant you brought the other day,” you smiled lightly jogging to the runway.

“Why don't you ask her on a date, Buck,” Steve nudged.

“Come on, she’s way too smart to go out with a dumbass like me,” Bucky joked.

“Seriously.”

“I don’t know. It’s been years since I’ve talked to another woman. It doesn’t come naturally anymore. Wha- what’s even the first I’d say to her?”

“I don’t know, man. I’m on the same boat with you. Just… Tell how nice she looks today when she comes back.”

“Really?” Bucky asked skeptically.

“Yeah, be nice to her.”

“I am nice to her.”

“I mean be extra nice. Flatter her,” Steve told him, “Go wait in the lab until she comes back and tell her she looks pretty today.”

“Isn’t Tony in the lab?” Bucky asked.

“Ha ha, yeah,” Steve teased, patting his back before leaving to his room.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Tony mumbled seeing Bucky waltzing in the room awkwardly.

“Nothing,” he mumbled back.

Tony dropped his hands and stared at Bucky with an unimpressed look on his face. Everyone but you knew about Barnes’ little boy crush on you but he’s never had the balls to say anything. You were close to Tony and seeing as though he doesn’t particularly like Bucky, he didn’t want you hanging around him. But you were an adult so of course you hung out with whoever you wanted.

He was sure you liked him back too which never ceased to make him roll his eyes.

You walked back from the quinjet with the glass container of daisies. You weren’t exactly a plant expert but it was apparent that these daisies were mutated seeing as though the pollen swirled around the flowers gracefully. It was beautiful but then again they might be extremely dangerous considering it was a Hydra experiment.

“Hey Y/n, off to the lab again?” Steve smiled.

“Yup, gotta check these babies out according to Thor; said they might be dangerous if they’re what he thinks they are,” you said, still walking.

“And what’s that?” you just shrugged at his question unsure of the answer yourself.

“Well, Bucky’s waiting for you in the lab,” he slipped in the conversation.

“Really? Why’s-” Crash!

“Oh no,” Tony mumbled, seeing the collision in action.

“Shit, I’m so sorry,” you stuttered.

“No, no. I should be sorry. Here let me help,” bucky knelt to the ground grabbed the fallen daisies with his bare hands.

“No! Don’t touch-” Tony shouted practically sprinting towards you two.

The golden pollen swirled in a misty manner engulfing Bucky completely. You stared with furrowed brows confused at the sight before you and what was going on. Bucky’s skin began to burn and his senses were being overloaded. All he could smell in that moment was you; the same scent that he got a whiff of this morning when he hugged you, the perfume and the shampoo that filled his senses when you walked passed him.

Tony pushed you out of the lab roughly throwing you in Steve’s arms who was just as confused.

“FRIDAY,” Tony called out.

“Yes, Mr. Stark,” the familiar voice answered.

“Lock all the doors to the lab and maybe turn on the a/c,” he commanded.

“Of course, Mr. Stark.”

All the glass walls and doors instantly shut and locked, locking Bucky inside. Bucky’s eyes found your and slammed his body against the glass desperately trying to reach you. You too ran up to the glass wall trying to understand what had happened to him. Everything was happening so suddenly.

Your forehead was pressed against the glass as was Bucky’s; both of you staring into each other’s eyes momentarily. In that moment, you could see his eyes turn golden for a quick second before his pupils dilated ridiculously before your eyes.

“Is he going to be ok?” you turned away.

“Y/n! Please!” Bucky’s muffled screams shocked you.

“Uh… where’s Thor?” Tony panicked.

“What the hell is happening?” Nat asked; Sam, Wanda, and Vision trailing behind closely.

“Nat,” you ran to her.

“What happened to Bucky?” Same asked.

“He- I ran- I ran into him by a-accident and the box dropped. There was mist everywhere and Bucky's eyes. His eyes,” you stammered breathlessly.

“Please! I need her!” Bucky hit the glass in an attempt to break it.

“Oh my goodness,” Wanda gasped at the sweaty Bucky hitting and practically going feral.

“Oh god, is he gonna be ok?” you teared up. This is your fault, dammit.

“I can asure he will experience no physical harm,” Thor’s voice made all of you turn around.

“Just physically? What the hell does that mean?” Sam argued.

“Well, uh… I’ve never actually seen it’s effects in person. Especially not on a Midguardian…” his voice trailed off and his eyes grew big.

Nat snapped her head, eyes widening as well. Bucky with absolutely no shame held his hard dick in his hands pumping it with his eyes trained on you. You went to turn around seeing nat’s expression but she covered you eyes before you could actually see the lewd behavior Bucky indulged in.

“What’s happening?” you asked holding onto Nat as she led across the room.

“Nothing, they’re gonna take care of Buck. Don’t worry about it,” she said quickly.

You sat in your room bouncing your leg as the movie on your TV played. Every now and then Bucky would moan and cry particularly loud making all of you wince and cringe. But your mind felt foggy simply thinking about Bucky and his safety; especially that moment when his eyes went from confusion to you don’t even know what. Hunger? Desire? Lust?

Whatever it was, it made your tummy flutter.

“Steve, any news on Bucky?” Steve stood at the doorway with a worrisome face that did nothing to ease your already panicked nerves.

“Well, as far as Thor knows the plant that was mutated with the daisies was pollen extracted from a breeding plant common among other galaxies; for species that can’t… reproduce like we do. The pollen enters the system and targets the nociceptors causing excruciating pain without physical harm. If untreated the victim can reach a traumatic state and truthfully, they will do anything to stop the pain; even kill themselves.”

“What the hell does any of that mean?” Sam grunted.

“It means the tin man is painfully horny,” Tony interrupted.

“Are you fucking serious?” Sam said in disbelief.

“What’s the cure?” Nat said.

“Oxytocin, of course,” Tony said.

“The cuddle hormone,” you whispered.

“Yup. Banner and I are already working on a serum containing artificial oxytocin in hopes to minimize the pain or even better cure him completely. We-”

“I’m afraid it’s going to be a bit more complicated than that,” Thor interrupted Tony.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, see the pollen, it’s a little tricky. The oxyputin-thingy you mentioned…”

“Oxytocin,” Tony clarified but Thor didn’t care too much.

“I don't think artificial love is going to cure the boy. If you want results, he needs to be the one he desires most. That’s where you’ll get your oxy-pudding.”

“Oxy- You know what, we can figure this out without anyone needing to have sex,” Tony groaned.

“Tony, maybe we shouldn’t-” you started.

“Nope, we can do this. We’re science bros,” Tony stormed away like a child.

“Isn’t your lab being ‘occupied’,” Nat called out.

“Shit!”

Hours went by and the oxytocin experiments were clearly a fail. The first dose did nothing. The second also nothing. The third relieved him for only ten seconds before he went back to his painful state. Since then, they haven’t been able to help or relieve Bucky’s circumstance any longer.

You thought about Thor’s words, about how the one he desires most could cure him. A ping of jealousy struck your heart but you knew you to find the woman Bucky loved and just pray that she'd help him. You made your way back to the lad area where Tony and Bruce had their new makeshift set up while the lab was locked down.

“Tony, this is ridiculous. It’s been going on for too long. You heard what Thor said about what happens when it gets too much,” you begged.

“And what do you suggest we do?” Tony said angrily.

“We need to find the woman that Bucky loves so she can help him,” you argued back.

“It's not just some woman, Y/n! He wants you.”

“What?”

“All the bastard’s been doing for the past eight hours has been masterbating while moaning your name. I’m not putting you in that situation,” Tony yelled.

You couldn’t speak. Was he telling you the truth? Did Bucky want you like that? The same way you secretly wanted him? It’s not like you haven't thought about what being with Bucky would be like before. He was perfect; so handsome and charming.

You ran back to your room where the rest of the guys still were practically out of breath; your heart hammering out of your chest and your stomach fluttering like it does whenever you think about Bucky.

“I need to get to Bucky,” you panted out.

“What?”

“Please you guys need to help me. Tony said that Bucky wants me; I mean can you believe. A guy like him wanting me? I’m just… nobody. He’s way too out of my league and-”

“Y/n, focus,” Nat said.

“Right. I- I want to help him. I know I can.”

“Y/n, we don’t know how dangerous this is. I mean, it came from Hydra, this could be weaponized and you could get hurt,” Steve argued.

“Bucky could never hurt me,” you whispered; Nat looked at you softly, understanding the situation better realizing you were probably Bucky’s only chance of a cure.

“You’re not actually considering letting her do this are you?” Steve scolded Nat.

"Are Tony and Bruce making any progress?" she sighed.

"They haven't been to even relieve his pain for longer than ten seconds," you whispered.

"Steve, this is Bucky we're talking about. Hasn't he endure enough torture in his life?" Nat said softly.

That seemed to convince him. Seeing Bucky in so much pain like he had been only years ago was unfair, especially when they technically already knew a cure. Waiting this out was pure evil at this point.

"How do you suppose we go about this?" he asked.

You devised a plan in order to let Bucky from the lab; he'd find his way to you on his own. Wanda stood from afar using her powers to tamper with the equipment. Tony frustratingly would have to run across the compound to the conference rooms to grab new devices in order to continue with his notes and tests.

On his way back, Steve and his convincing and charming ways would stall Tony's return asking him all sorts of questions about Bucky's state. Meanwhile, Thor made up some excuse to lure Banner away just for a minute so Nat and Sam could override the lockdown through Friday and free Bucky.

All the while you sat in your room waiting anxiously for Bucky to barge through the door and have his way with you.

A few minutes went by and no sign of a ruckus you'd assume would accompany the escape plan. You fiddled with the hem of your skirt biting your lip in anticipation. Still no sign after a couple more minutes. Wanting to make sure you still looked alright for Buck, although he'd probably not even acknowledge your appearance, you stood up to walk to your bathroom.

Just as you stood up, Bucky in all his muscle and broad glory slammed the door behind him staring at you with nothing but desperate hunger. Your stomach flipped when you saw him lock the door, pushing a small chair you had just next to it in front of the door under the handle.

He stalked towards practically panting and you took in his appearance. His hair was quite disheveled and sweat lined his forehead and slightly down his neck. Despite that, he still looked so handsome and sexy.

"маленький, all dressed up for me to ruin," he growled crawling up the bed as you crawled back.

"Buck, are you ok? I want to help you," you whispered.

"I'm more than ok now, beautiful," he whispered leaning into you, his nose brushing against yours, chuckling when you visibly trembled.

"Is my красивый маленький ангел gonna let me use her?" he whispered, huskily.

"Bucky, I don't understand what you're saying."

"так драгоценно," he whispered against your lips before pressing himself completely against you.

His hands, contrast between hot and cold, crept under your shirt brushing lightly over your delicate skin. You had somewhat expected Bucky to have no control and use you relentlessly, of which you wouldn't have minded, but this soft ginger foreplay was really making your panties wet.

Bucky slowly lifted the shirt from your body before tossing it to the side and removing his own. His hands cupped your breasts squeezing the soft flesh quite roughly making you sigh and moan at the feeling.

His lips attached themselves to your neck biting and sucking harshly littering your skin with dark purple marks. He nibbled on your ear as he grinding his pelvis against yours, his large erection poking your center making you even more aroused.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you. It smelled just like you," he whispered.

"T- The daisies?"

"I've been craving you, aching for you. Thinking about how good you're gonna feel wrapped around my cock," he panted speeding up his grinding thrusts.

"Buck," you breathed out.

Bucky shuddered over you before stilling for a moment. He couldn't help it, your scent, your warm skin pressed against his, he couldn't hold back anymore coming straight away in his pants.

You brushed his hair softly soothing him from his high. You thought it was over, that he felt better and was finally cured but almost instantly you felt Bucky harden under you, poking between your thighs and you gasped knowing very well it was going to be a long night.

Bucky stood on his knees and pulled your bottoms down your legs nearly ripping the material. He too rid his bottoms throwing them god knows where before climbing back on top of you. You stared adorably up at him and Bucky almost came again. He smiled softly at you before kissing you once more.

Suddenly, loud bangs on your door startled you but not Bucky.

"What the hell are you doing!" Tony screamed.

"Tony, you gotta stop! This is the only way! It's not fair to him to let him keep suffering. He's done enough of that, ok?" Nat shouted.

"She's gonna get hurt," Tony sighed.

"No she won't. This was her idea."

Tony looked back teary eyed. He really cared for you as his own and putting you in a situation like this wasn't fair to you either. He really tried to help but this was just too complicated and too advanced to solve in only a few hours. They were right, Bucky needed you as much as he didn't like that idea too much.

"Fine."

Bucky lined his cock with your entrance wrapping your legs around his waist. Slowly he pushed in pulling moans from you both. You've only had a couple lovers previous to Bucky but neither of them ever filled you so perfectly. Bucky stretched you out like none other and admittedly he wanted to use his fingers on you first but he'd been away for too long it was too painful to go another second without being inside you.

"So tight and warm, little one. Feel so fucking good wrapped around me."

"Buck," you moaned.

You wrapped your arms around his neck pulling him impossibly closer to you as you kissed along his neck and jaw. Bucky moaned breathlessly in your ear and you couldn't help the clenching around him from arousal.

"Fuck, keep doing that, little one," he groaned.

Toy squeezed your thighs together and clenched around him again making him groan louder this time. His thrusts became sporadic and you moved against like a ragdoll unable to keep up with his relentless pace.

Your legs began to shake and your back arched into his chest reaching you first high of the night, gushing all over his cock. You realize he hasn't come and gently push him off you before flipping over to let him take you again from behind.

As expected, Bucky pushed into once again deeper this time and you shuddered under his hand that rested atop your arched back. Bucky smacked and kneaded your ass thrusting in and out. The lewd squelching sound of his thrust mixed with the sound of skin slapping against each other echoed in the room.

"Shit, little one. Taking my cock so fucking well," he reached forward and bunch up your hair pulling your head back harshly.

“Shit,” you mumbled.

Your knuckles turned white as you gripped the sheets as hard as you could. You were approaching your orgasm quickly and you weren't going to be able to hold back any longer. Your pussy clenched around Bucky's cock making him throw his head back in pleasure.

"Please, Bucky," you whimpered.

"You wanna come, darling. You wanna cream all over daddy's cock?"

"Yes! Fuck!" your arms shook before giving out completely; your head buried in the sheets as Bucky continued that same wild and rough pace.

"Please let me come, daddy!"

Your body felt on fire. No one has ever made you feel this good before, it was almost too much, too overwhelming. Tears brimmed your eyes from trying to desperately hold back. You wanted to come with Bucky but seeing as his pace had yet to slow down you were beginning to think he wasn't even close.

"Let go, doll."

Your body squirmed beneath him as you released all over his dick. You came with a near shout, your body violently trembling from the intensity of your high. Bucky slowed his pace for your comfort, gently riding your orgasm slowly down despite his still aching erection.

He languidly rolled you over to your back, his hands softly rubbing your sides up to your breasts. You breathed heavily, eyes feeling droopy, all you could feel in that moment was his cum dripping from you onto the sheets.

Bucky, still knelt on the bed and still chasing his release, lifted your legs over his thighs gripping your hip with one hand and his cock with the other. You squeezed your thighs together when you felt his tip poking at your entrance once again, soft whimpers emitting from you shakily.

"Such a good girl. Gonna let me take you again? Gonna let me keep using you?" he moaned.

"Use me, Buck. I'm all yours," you breathed out.

Bucky pushed himself past your folds once again, your cum easily letting him slide in. Both his hands made home on your hips gripping hardly surely to leave marks for you to remember this very moment. You looked at Bucky as his thrusts slowly began to pick up, bringing your own hands to your breasts to play with your nipples. You twisted the perked buds, moaning softly at the feeling as well as Bucky filling you perfectly once again.

"Filling me up so good, baby," you moaned, arching your back slightly allowing Bucky to hit a newer and deeper angle inside you.

"Pussy was fucking made for me," he growled.

His hand moved from its home on your hip right over your lower belly where he could feel his cock so deep poking his own hand through your tummy.

"Feel how fucking deep I am?"

You moved your hand and he pressed yours in the same spot under his and you moaned loudly, shuddering under him.

His pace quickened and for a moment he thought he was going to finally reach his high, that release he'd been thinking about for hours today, but when he felt you clench again, squeezing his cock tightly and he didn't cum, he knew it was gonna be chase that he didn't know you'd be up for. You gushed all over his dick, back arching and your legs pressing tight around his torso, coming with a loud scream of his name.

Bucky fell forward with tears in his eyes. His skin still felt hot and sticky. His sense felt dialed up to an eleven. It was all so overwhelming and all he wanted was to cum in you and hold you closer whispering how he really loved you. He pressed faint kisses to you equally sticky and warm skin and when you felt warm liquid dripping onto your skin to lift Bucky's head to find him crying.

"What's wrong, baby?"

“I can’t cum. I just wanna cum,” he whined.

“Hey, hey. It’s ok. I can go as many times as you need me to. I want to help you, let me do that.”

“Can- Can you uh… use your mouth please? I want to feel those pretty lips wrapped around my cock so bad,” he moaned.

“Of course, baby. I’d do anything for you,” you smirked before pushing him and crawling over him holding his dick in your hand.

Hours and literally hours had passed until Bucky was finally tired out only having cum three times compared to the fifteen-plus times you had. Your bed laid on the ground; the wooden stands snapped about two hours ago. Most of your sheets were torn to shreds and marks littered your body from your neck down to your hips and your knees from, well you know.

Your body shook as you laid in a fetal position. You burned between your thighs; the soreness overwhelming but pleasant at the same time. Sweat made what was left of the sheets stick to your body until Bucky pulled them from you to clean you. He used a warm towel all over your body with tears in his eyes whispering how sorry he was about everything.

“I swear I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I’m so sorry. I understand if you hate me now; if you never want to see me again. Just know that I’m so sorry about your bed, the blankets, if I hurt you, everything,” he sniffled, eyes and nose red and puffy.

“Bucky,” you whispered, your voice raspy and croaky from your moaning and screaming all night.

“Y/n,” he whispered back. You pulled him by the back of his neck into a soft yet passionate kiss.

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” he breathed out when you pulled away. You cupped his face with shaky hands but a smile on your face.

“Do you mean it?”

“Of course. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met. I’ve dreamt about holding you far too many times, more than I’d like to admit. I should’ve told you sooner but like everyone else, I was scared you didn’t like me back; at least not this way,” he rubbed your legs indicating the intimate love he had for you.

“Buck, it’s virtually impossible for anyone not to fall in love with you. Unless they’re Tony,” you giggled as did he.

“Can you say it?” he asked softly.

“That I love you?” you smiled brushing your nose against his; Bucky practically purred as he nodded.

“I love you, James,” you whispered.

“Fuck, I love you too.”

He laid you down softly again on the broken bed pressing light kisses all over your collarbones and shoulders. You brushed his hair with your fingers as he clung onto you ready to sleep.

“Thank you again, doll. For helping me today,” he said after a couple minutes of silence.

“Of course, my love. Besides I’m the one who ran into you with those damn daisies.”

“Thank god for them then. And for your clumsiness,” Bucky chuckled.

“Meanie,” you snorted, making Bucky laugh even more.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Buck.”

ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ: (For all my work)

@mathletemadison

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Bucky Barnes Taglist:

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#bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x reader #james buchanan barnes #james buchanan barnes smut #marvel smut #marvel fics #bucky barnes x you #sex pollen

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mandoalorian · 4 years ago

Text

Sinner [Dark!Din Djarin x F!Reader] *SMUT*

Summary: The Mandalorian has been attending confession for weeks now, with the sole intensive purpose to see you.

Rating: 18+ smut

Warnings: Dark!Din, implied age difference, religion kink (don’t come for me...), sex in a place of worship, smut: loss of virginity, mutual masturbation, dirty talk, degradation, unprotected p in v, cunningless, death mention, alcohol mention, brothel mention.

Word Count: 4000+

Masterlist

REBLOGS APPRECIATED!<3

He’d been coming to confess for about a year now. He’d gone off the rails when he lost the kid. You’d heard rumours about the Mandalorian — strong, fierce, brave... a warrior. You certainly wouldn’t have pinned him for a man of faith. You’d seen him a few times when you were shadowing your father in church. He was tall, broad shouldered, and only came during the dead of night, when the abbey was completely isolated.

“Hello,” you greeted him, your soft voice echoing throughout the chambers. Your crimson red heels clicked against the marble floor beneath you as you approached the masked figure. Curtseying politely and removing your hood, you couldn’t help but bat your eyelashes in the direction the Mandalorian. “It’s quite late. I was just closing for the night.” you admitted, biting down on your lower lip in hope that he’d understand.

“I thought places of worship aren’t supposed to close?” He countered quizzically, an air of amusement in his voice.

“You’re right, technically,” you hummed, picking at your nails as a wash of nerves flooded over you. “But my father is out of town and... I need to sleep.”

That’s where he recognised you from— you were the daughter of the Grand Bishop. He’d seen you before, doting around the abbey in your signature black gown and red robes. You were hard to miss, your beauty being beyond standards of measure. Yes, he knew you. He had noticed you watching him from the pillars above, when you thought nobody was looking. He noticed the way you’d deliberately brush past his body... desperate for just the slightest touch. He recognised your scent too; it was sweet like honey. And your ruby coloured lips. He’d dreamt of them plenty of times. It was really you.

“Where is he?” The Mandalorian asked after a beat of prolonged silence.

“He was requested by Senator Berenko to present evening mass on Naboo, for the Festival of Lights.” you explained, probably offering a little too much information.

“When will he be back?”

“Next week.”

“Well, I’ll be back then.”

No, you couldn’t just let him leave. You couldn’t just let him walk away from you. This was your chance. In a fluster, you extended your arm and pawed at his bicep. He froze under your touch, and you hoped that you hadn’t overstepped.

“Are— you’re here to confess. Aren’t you?” you asked him with a nervous gulp. Maker, why were you so nervous? The Mandalorian didn’t say anything, so you heeded to continue. “I’ve seen you come by before. I know you speak to my father usually but— I can do it. The confession, I mean. I’ve been shadowing my father for the past few months— training with him. I can do it. If... if you’d like me to.”

The Mandalorian took a moment to process your words. Maker; you were a sight to behold. Your eyes were starry and reflective of the galaxy he’d spent so long venturing. Your skin was soft and delicate. You were pure— untouched— holy. He was afraid the discussion of his sins might be a bit too much for you to handle.

Or maybe there was something more.

Maybe he was afraid that once he’d start opening up to you, he wouldn’t be able to stop. He wouldn’t be able to resist you.

“Aren’t you a little young?” The Mandalorian scoffed incredulously, bringing his leather gloved hand to his helmet, his thumb grazing the cloth between his chin and his neck. His rude manner didn’t surprise you at all, but yet, you kept a strong posture and held your head high.

“I’m old enough.” you declared, not ripping your gaze from him once. Even through the dark tinted visor of his helmet, it felt like you were looking into his eyes, staring deep into his soul.

So, he agreed. You told him to wait in the confession box by the altar. “I won’t be long, I just have to lock up and turn out the lights.”

As you walked down the aisle, you lit a match and ignited some candles. They were tall and made from beeswax, and the flicking amber flames provided barely enough light. But it had to be enough. It had to do. The wax dripped down the sculptures and chambersticks, pooling into swirls of hardening ivory.

The Mandalorian waited for you in the confession box, having already discarded the plates of his beskar armour. It was hard to wear, and heavy on his back, but he felt safe… here, with you. He had no reason to be still wearing it. No more fighting tonight, he hoped.

The image of you couldn’t escape his mind, no matter how hard he tried. Dirty thoughts — it was wrong of him. You were the Grand Bishop’s daughter for Heaven’s sake.

When you entered your side of the confession box, your full intention was to follow the ordinary strict protocol. There was no reason for distraction.

“State your name for the records,” you requested, shuffling around as you worked on getting comfortable in your chair.

“Din Djarin.”

Din Djarin. It was a beautiful name. Your mind immediately went to pairing his last name with your first name, and then you cursed yourself for the inappropriate thought.

“Din,” his name left your lips like the sweetest tasting honey. “Why are you here today? What would you like to confess?”

“I went to Corellia over the weekend,” he announced, his voice cold through the modulator. “The bad part— well, it’s all bad over there,” he corrected himself before continuing. “Got into some trouble gambling at Lady Proxima’s casino and a bunch of white worms surrounded me. So I killed them, all of them. I didn’t have to. But I did. I murdered them in cold blood.”

It was in that moment you learned how dangerous of a man The Mandalorian was. His beskar armour was just as cold as his heart.

“Wh— why did you kill them?” you asked timidly, almost afraid to know the answer.

“For the release. The adrenaline. The feeling of power. I can’t escape it. Have you ever killed?”

“N—no.”

Din scoffed incredulously. “Of course you haven’t.”

“What do you do after you kill?” you inquired, hoping to change the subject.

“Corellia has the best brothels… cheap too. I sought them out and look for a quick fuck.”

“Out of wedlock?” you pondered with a queasy frown.

Din laughed. “You’re asking if I’m married?”

He was right, it was a foolish question.

“Do you enjoy your time at the brothel? Or do you regret it soon after?” you wondered.

Another laugh— and Maker, he made you feel terrible. Were you really that bad at this?

“Yes, I enjoy myself. The girls there are pretty little things. Needy. Desperate. But— it’s not special, you know? It’s not… not exactly what I crave.”

“What do you crave?”

“To touch someone untouched. Pure. Holy…” the Mandalorian trailed off. “So, when I fuck the girls at the brothel, I tend to think of the Grand Bishop’s daughter.” He revealed, feeling his cock harden in the confines of his pants at the memory. You swallowed, a wave of heat immediately washing over you. You. He was thinking about you.

This was ridiculous. Was he messing with you? He had to have been messing with you. Sure, he’d seen you around before but neither of you had even held a conversation, prior to today. And he’d been thinking about you while he was sleeping with other women? You had to suck it up and remain professional, no matter how much it irked you. He was here to confess and you couldn’t let this become personal.

But it was so hard. Maker, why was it this hard? Was it because you’d thought about him too? Because you’d imagined his cock in place of your fingers, at night when everyone else is sleeping? You yearned to know more. You ached to know the details. Surely that was fair. He was speaking about you, after all.

You could already feel your panties begin to dampen with arousal. How could one man have such an effect on you? In your place of worship too. You wanted to punch him, kick him, take out all your anger on him. But most importantly, you wanted him. His touch. His hands on your body and his cock splitting you open. That’s what you wanted the most.

“What did— what did you think of?” You swallowed, anticipating the details. You were glad he couldn’t see how flustered and hot you were right now. It certainly wasn’t in the code for you to ask about details such as this but… surely one question would do no harm.

You could just about hear Din chuckle, from the other side of the wall, and it made your slick wet cunt clench around absolutely nothing. He was driving you feral. “I’d think about her ruby red lips and how they’d look wrapped around my cock. I’d imagine fucking her mouth, making her gag— wanting her to cry. I’d want to see the tears stream down her cheeks as I give her my all. And finally, I’d imagine her letting me cum down her throat.”

There was something about him talking about you, to you, in third person. Like you weren’t supposed to be there, listening. Like this information was not made for your ears.

Your panties were soaked at the thought. You couldn’t believe it. All this time, all these sessions of confession with your father, and it had only stirred him on more. He’d been going to confess, only to see you.

“Tell me, princess. How does that make you feel?”

Shit. He could not be serious right now. You placed your palm flat against the wall and took a deep breath. “Mando, you’re here to confess. Not me.”

You tried to shut out his words, but your body ached for him. Ached to feel him… touch him. You wanted him just as much as he wanted you — but it would be wrong. It would be so wrong.

Another chuckle. You hated when he did that. As if all of this was some kind of joke to him. Did he even know what he was doing to you? It was like torture.

“See, the Grand Bishop’s daughter… oh wow. She’s a vision. She dotes crimson red lips and she walks around as if she owns the place, her stiletto heels clicking against the floor. She’s bad, like the devil in disguise, and yet, I know her. She’s young and untouched. Her father will probably marry her off to some other minister in the outer-rim, ship her away for good. And she’ll be forced to deal with very mediocre sex for the rest of her life. Which is a shame, really, because she deserves better. You deserve better.”

“You have no idea who I am.” you spat out, feeling your cheeks burn with rage. How dare he make these assumptions about you and your family. This crude, older man with a tongue that could kill. How dare he.

You wanted to be mad at him so bad. He couldn’t possibly get away with this. But he was going to. Because what exactly could you do?

“She’ll never know how it feels to be stretched open by a real cock,” Din gritted out, dismissing your comment completely. “F—fuck.”

Din was palming himself through his pants, desperate for some kind of release. His sleuth, dirty words set a fire blazing in your core. You wanted it too. You wanted it so bad. You contemplated all the things you could do, all the actions and their consequences. You and the Mandalorian, both in the confession box. You couldn’t even see one another… the prolonged silence on your end prompted Din to get up and leave when he heard your honey velvet voice speak once more.

You had to say something.

“When the lights are out and everyone is asleep, I think about you,” you confessed, hating the way the croaky admission left your lips. You’d done it now. Din’s head snapped upwards to face the wall and oh how he wished he could see you right now. You were squirming around in your chair and when you heard the zipper of his pants become undone, you knew it was your queue to continue. “I touch myself. It’s hard to keep quiet… thinking about you. I imagine you touching me… running your gloved hands all over my body,” you bring your hand to your breast and give it a little squeeze. “I figure.. maybe you don’t take the gloves off. You praise me when you feel how wet I am, and I tell you that it’s all for you. I’m all yours. To use however you like. I want you to ruin me. Spoil me for any other man. Fuck me until I cant walk. Bite me, give me marks I have to hide during tomorrow’s mass.”

Din made a fist around his cock and began to pump as he listened to the dirty words that left your holy lips. His grunts and groans echoed throughout the box and went straight to your core. Oh how you wished you could see him right now. Peeling up the hem of your robe, you slid your fingers under the waistband of your panties and began to rub tight circles into your clit.

“You’re a virgin?” he asked, although it came out more so like a statement. Like he already knew the answer.

“Ye-yeah,” you whimpered, quickening your pace.

He was achingly stiff now, beads of milky white precum already dripping down his shaft.

“You want this?” He quizzed. “You want my cock right now? Think you deserve it?”

And in that moment, you made your decision.

Maybe this life that your father had given you, just wasn’t for you.

“Y-yes, oh God yes. I deserve it.”

A low and dark chuckle left Din’s lips. “You’ve been a child of God your whole life. But you want this, yes? You’ve been waiting for this?”

He was right. You had been waiting for this.

“P-please Din, please. Wreck me. Ruin me.”

“In the chapel too?” he laughed, rising to his feet. “You really are desperate. C’mon then.”

In a fluster, you practically fell out of your side of the confession box.

The Mandalorian stalked towards you with his cock in his hand, jerking himself off as he got nearer and nearer. His eyes didn’t leave you once and although you couldn’t see his face, you could only imagine the predatory glint in his eye. Maker he was huge, and thick, and you wondered how you’d ever be able to take him.

You weren’t used to this— Maker, you’d never done anything like this before. There was no way your fingers would ever be able to compare to the size of the Mandalorian.

“Are you sure you want this?” he grunted, releasing his cock and grabbing your throat, giving it an experimental squeeze. You nodded your head desperately and subconsciously licked your lower lip. “I must know. If I start, I won’t be able to stop. Do you want me to claim you?”

Just like Hades claimed Persephone? You shut the absent thought out of your mind and agreed to his proposition.

“I do.”

If it was so wrong, why did it feel so right? You had dreamt of this moment. How could you ever deny him?

He pinned you against the altar and tapped at your thigh, gesturing for you to open your legs up. His eyes dropped straight to your dripping core and he had to hold back a guttural moan.

Din wasted no time and rubbed his cock along your slick wet folds. For a second you were afraid he’d knock over the many burning candles that you had lit earlier in the evening, before your little confession session had begun. But, to no surprise of your own, the Mandalorian had extremely good coordination.

“Oh f-fuck, such a pretty little thing. So warm, bet— bet you feel so fucking good.” Din mumbled utterances of praise, his grip tightening around your wrists as he propped you up.

Every now and again the bulbous tip of his cock rubbed over your clit and the sensation practically sent you into orbit. You were touch starved, having never experienced intimacy like this with anyone before. “Do you want me to fuck you now, huh? Want me to fuck that pretty little cunt of yours?”

You whimpered a small ‘yes’ and Din chuckled darkly, tapping his cock against your cunt before sliding into you with one swift movement.

You let out a squeal, your fingernails digging into the muscles of his back as he seated deep inside you. Underneath his helmet, his perfect lips were parted into an ‘O’ shape as your fluttering walls clenched around him and made him feel like he was home.

“Fuck— so tight, so fucking tight. Just like I’d imagined.” He murmured, feeling like he was already seeing stars.

Din thrust upwards into you, the curve of his cock stretching you open and pulsating inside of you. His movements were rough and bruising, as his fingers dug into the soft flesh at your hips as he held onto you for support. Just like you’d requested, he was completely and utterly using you.

“How’s that?” his gasp rolled into an achingly long groan as his balls slapped against your cunt, creating the most obscene wet sounds.

It was uncomfortable at first. He wasn’t soft or gentle by any means, but you’d anticipated that. After just a few thrusts, the intrusive pain turned into bolts of pleasure that coursed through your veins. It clouded your vision like white noise— like what the red berry wine you’d drink during Sunday mass would do to your mind. Din grabbed at the thin cloth that covered your chest, and ripped it off, exposing your bare breasts to him. A sheen of glistening sweat glazed your skin like the most beautiful honey dew. The Mandalorian was tall and broad, and as he towered over you, he coated you in his dark shadow.

His large hands palmed at your breasts and you moaned at the sudden, unexpected contact. He continued thrusting, fucking you mercilessly. With every movement, he hit that sweet spot inside of you, and you knew he’d been doing this for a long time. He was definitely experienced.

He dropped his hand for your chest and lowered it to your clit, expertly moving his two fingers across your bundle of nerves. That feeling, combined with his thick cock, was enough to send you over the edge.

“Oh yes, yes, yes,” you chanted his name like it was a prayer— and he felt powerful.

The Mandalorian grinned wolfishly under his helmet as he increased his speed. You were seeing stars and it felt like your whole body was trapped under a spell. His spell.

“I ca- oh I can’t, I’m close, I’m close,” you cried as he continued to rock his hips into yours.

You hugged his body into yours, wishing the pleasure would never end. With every twitch of his cock he watched you intently. He watched the way your body reacted to him, revelling in the way your face screwed up in heated pleasure. Din adored the way your brow knitted together and your mouth parted as the most angelic noises omitted from your plush lips.

“Have you ever felt so alive than you do right now, with me inside of you?” Din queried with a grunt.

“No,” you answered, shaking your head profusely. “Please don’t stop.”

Your orgasm ripped through you like a tornado and without warning, The Mandalorian split his seed deep inside of you, his salty cum roping your perfect walls as they gripped down around his cock. Now he had marked you for life.

Din returned to confession a week later when your father had returned from the Festival of Lights. There was no reason for you to see The Mandalorian anymore.

“Forgive me, Grand Bishop, for I have sinned yet again.” Din announced, his voice clear as daylight after discarding his beskar helmet. He ran a gloved hand over his face.

“Another kill?” your father inquired, but from the other side of the wall, Din could only smirk.

“I’ve met a woman. A holy woman. And she has consumed my every thought. When I think about her I feel more inclined to sin, over and over again.”

It was true. Your ruby red lips, high heels, thin robes… Din had become completely enraptured with you.

Your father spent a moment contemplating the Mandalorian’s words, finding that he was speaking a lot differently than ever before. Not as ruthless or dangerous— but almost genuine.

“Would you give your body to this holy woman, if she requested you do so?” The Grand Bishop asked, not realising he was speaking about you, his own daughter.

“I already have,” Din confessed, subconsciously licking a stripe over his lower lip, at the memory of your taste. “And I would do it again.”

-—-—-—♡—-—-—-

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#din djarin #pedro pascal #the mandalorian #din djarin x reader #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal smut #din djarin smut #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian smut #dark din #star wars #jose pedro balmaceda pascal

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cower-before-power · 4 years ago

Text

Piety

Summary: Gojo has sinned, and he will repent at the altar of his beloved

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x F!Reader

TW: swearing, implied sexual content, idolatry

Link to A03 here

A/N: First time writing for everyone’s favourite sensei, hope I did him justice. This man can step on me. Enjoy, sweet potatoes!

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“You’re late.”

He laughs softly from the doorway. “I told you I would be.”

“I know,” you say, your eyes focused on the rising moon out the window. “But you’ve always said I was the exception.”

“You are,” you can hear walk over to the closet; next, the rustling of clothes as he sheds his uniform. “But Yuuji-kun is doing so well I got overexcited and just had to stay a bit longer. When I was finished with him, I was planning on rushing straight home to you, but then I ran into my other darling first years. They wanted me to watch them fight. Their training for the exchange is coming along nicely too.”

“Hmmmmm,” you hum, rocking on your heels, “good reasons to be late, I suppose.”

You can’t help but let a little irritation creep into your voice. You’re not angry with him, not truly, but you can’t help be a little annoyed. Your lives were so busy it was often hard to find time to actually act like a couple. The two of you had set aside tonight to finally go out together, a real date. You’d made reservations at a fancy restaurant and even got dressed up for once. Not that you didn’t love your late night routine of takeout, Netflix and sex, but it was nice every once and a while to get out.

To pretend everything was normal. To pretend you were normal.

So when he texted you that he was sorry but things came up, could you please cancel the reservation-you couldn’t help but feel....cast aside.

You loved Gojo’s dedication to his students and his passion for his cause. You were proud of his strength, his powers. But sometimes it felt like you were a planet orbiting around his brilliant sun, competing with all the others for his warmth and light. He was the best, and was always needed by someone somewhere. You knew it was what you were in for when you put your heart in his hands, but it was still sometimes a bitter pill to swallow.

“You’re upset with me,” he says, and you finally turn to face him. He’s out of his uniform and only in a pair of dark sweatpants; your favourite look. You have a strong urge to run to him and bury yourself in his chest. You stay put.

“No not at you, per say,” you run your hands through your hair, taking out the style you’d coaxed it into earlier. “Just at life, I guess. Things are always crazy around here, but they seem to be getting even wilder and it just makes it even harder for us to spend quality time together.”

“You’ve never complained before.”

You sigh, tugging at the straps of your dress. “I know, I know. I’m just in a mood today, I guess. I was really looking forward to going out, and when you texted me, I just felt, I don’t know, shuffled aside.”

He stays quiet, face unreadable. It’s unusual and quite frankly rather unsettling. You feel guilt suddenly bubble hotly in your stomach.

“I mean, it’s fine! What you were doing was very important! Yuuji needs all the training he can get, poor boy. Plus, Megumi and Nobara miss you, they’ve noticed you haven’t been around a lot and they probably just wanted to see you be proud of them, even if they’ll never admit it. I’m being silly, I mean, who cares if we missed the reservation, the students and their training is definitely more important than going out with me-“

Your words die on your lips as you find yourself suddenly pressed flush against the chest you were just admiring moments earlier. You blink and gasp-bright blue eyes are staring intently down into yours. It always stuns you momentarily to see them. They are like sapphires; not only beautiful in shine and hue, but rare and precious. They only show up when he’s feeling particularly loving and mushy, or the very limited occasions when he gets serious.

You have a feeling it’s the latter.

“What have I told you about being too kind, angel?” He scolds you, shaking his head as he cups your face in his large, warm hands. “Just come out and say I’m the asshole here.”

“But-“

“Hush now,” his voice grows stern, the tone he uses when he’s got you at his mercy. You obey on instinct, snapping your lips shut. “I shouldn’t have stayed so long at school, and I definitely shouldn’t have assumed that cancelling would be okay without asking. I’ve never, ever wanted you to feel like you’re playing second string, and I’ve gone and done just that.”

You frown. “I don’t feel like that all the time, please don’t think I-“

“Once is one time too many,” he interrupts. His fingers smooth over your skin, stroking the frown from your face. “I clearly fucked up. I let my angel, my reason to live, my sweet darling thief who stole my heart, down.”

(You feel warm. So he is feeling mushy as well as serious.)

He replaces his fingers with his lips, featherlight brushes over your skin that make your knees begin to wobble. “It’s okay,” you breathe, eyes slipping shut so he can kiss your eyelids gently. “You didn’t mean to.”

He laughs. “Sweetness, you are shit at being mad at someone. This is the part where you call me a prick and make me grovel for forgiveness.”

“You’ve never groveled in your life,” you hum. The irritation you’d been feeling earlier is melting away under his gentle ministrations. He hadn’t meant to hurt you. He sometimes forgets the two of you didn’t always operate on the same wavelength. He sometimes forgets that everyone didn’t operate on his wavelength.

“Another exception I’d make for you,” he nibbles at your bottom lip, and you can’t help but chase him, trying to catch him in a proper kiss. He just laughs and sweeps a thumb over where he’s just nipped. “I’ll even get on my knees.”

The image of the worlds most powerful shaman on his knees before you sends a shiver up your spine. And the perceptive bastard doesn’t miss it. He pulls away, peeling himself from your body with a sticky slowness that causes the air around you to heat and thicken. He sinks to his knees before you, palms upturned in perfect piety.

“Oh goddess divine, please accept my humble apologies,” the words drip from his lips like a sacred prayer. “I have displeased you, and I seek to make amends.”

“Only you could apologize and make fun of someone at the same time,” you murmer, feeling your cheeks begin to flush. “You’re an idiot.”

“An idiot who only wishes to repent for his sins,” he grins lazily up at you, and his upturned hands are suddenly on your legs, beneath your dress. His thumbs begin to rub circles on your inner thighs. Time stops; your next breath lodges in your throat.

“Tell me what I must do,” his voice is smooth like the silk of his blindfold, slipping over you. He leans in and presses a kiss just above your right knee. His mouth is hot against your skin.

“Ummmm....” you try to speak, but nothing comes out but a choked whimper.

“I’m waiting very patiently,” another kiss, this time slightly higher. Your brain begins to malfunction. You open and close your mouth, trying to get the words out, but there’s nothing. Nothing but his warm breath and deft hands. Nothing but crystalline blue darkened with hunger. Nothing but need beginning to boil in your blood.

“I’ll just have to decide the form of atonement myself,” he murmurs, skimming his nose along your inner thigh. His hands slowly slide up your legs, your dress is coming up with them....

And then you both hear it.

The loud grumbling of your very empty belly.

He pulls back and blinks up at you. You stare back, mouth open. And then you both burst into raucous laughter.

“What a mood killer,” he grins, sitting back on his heels. “I’ve never been cockblocked by your stomach before.”

“Sorry!” You rub the offending area, still giggling. “I guess in all my stewing I forgot I was hungry.”

He’s on his feet in a flash. “Well we can’t have you starve on me, can we, sweetness? I know, how about I cook for us?”

Your eyes light up. Gojo is an excellent cook, but he rarely does it due to his busy and exhausting schedule. And his bad habit of filling up on sweets. “Really?”

“Sure,” he’s already across the room, throwing on a shirt and his blindfold. “Tell you what, you go have a nice hot soak in the tub while I cook. I’ll bring you a glass of wine and something from my extra secret sweets stash to tide you over till I’m done.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Something from the secret stash? I’m honoured.”

He grins. “Another exception for my angel.” He suddenly claps his hands together. “Oh, and tomorrow we’ll play hookey! Go to Tokyo for the whole day, and I’ll spoil the absolute shit out of you. The kids can survive a day without us.”

“You already spoil me,” you laugh, shaking your head. “I’ll just be happy to spend a whole day just us.”

“No arguments!” He wags his finger. “I will drop mad cash on you and you will enjoy it.”

“Ugh you are such a dork,” you roll your eyes, but your heart fills with love for this silly man. You know he really is sorry and is trying to make it up to you. He’s an idiot on occasions, but he’s your idiot, and you wouldn’t trade him for the world.

You make to move towards the bathroom, but the lingering feel of his touch on your skin reminds you.

“Hey, what happens after the bath and food?”

Before you can blink, he’s back in front of you, gathering you against him. His smile is absolutely feral, and you can feel his smouldering gaze even through the black fabric now covering his eyes.

And his lips are descending on yours, hot and hungry. He licks into your mouth, swallowing the moan that’s threatening to escape. There’s nothing left but him. His touch, his taste, his scent. He is everywhere, in every sweep and valley of your body, in every corner of your pounding heart. He consumes you like fire consumes a forest, and you are happy to burn, burn, burn.

All too soon he pulls away, and you are left empty. Bereft. Lost. But he leans back in, his lips brushing your ear, his voice dark with reverent desire.

“I’ll worship at the altar of my divine goddess until my penance is paid a hundred fold.”

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chaoticevilbean · 3 years ago

Text

Another Star Wars AU, TBN*

*To-Be-Named

I love time travel. A lot. So here is a time-travel au, with the CW trio.

Somehow, perhaps by touching a Sith artifact, perhaps by the Force deciding they should, perhaps from some sort of weird ritual the locals were performing that the trio didn't know about, Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, Anakin, Rex, and Cody travel aback in time.

[Please keep in mind that Canon Timeline has died tragically in a fire, and I am but the weeping widow with an inheritance.]

Due to whatever happened, they all also end up (technically) deaging. They still have their memories and their knowledge and skills, just stuck in smaller bodies. They can think and act like adults, but they also have to struggle a bit more to implement Older Skills in Younger Bodies.

Ahsoka is 2. She's nubby. She's emotional. She's tired and sore from her deaging.

She wakes up in someone's office. She's in a spinny chair, a big one with leather padding. It's kind-of chilly in the room.

She's not thinking, because all her brain is putting together is that she's still tired. She grabs the jacket off the back of the chair and pulls it over herself. She goes back to sleep.

Rex and Cody wake up together.

They are their actual age, which is to say they're both about eleven.

They find themselves on Mandalore. In the more wild areas.

(let me believe that there are parts of the planet that aren't covered in city)

(also, this is the Mandalore in the cartoons)

They find a teen trying to wake them both up. Rex has absolutely no clue what's going on. Cody has a vague idea, because this girl looks very similar to a picture he once saw...

Obi-Wan does not fare as well. He is 3.

He wakes up in someone's arms. He's just as tired and sore as the other three. However, he's also got more awareness because he's in someone's arms.

He looks up to see who's carrying him.

He looks around at the people walking with them.

He starts crying. He cannot help this, as he is suddenly flooded with Emotions, and he is Smol. Smol = harder to handle Emotions.

Because Qui-Gon is walking right next to him, tapping away on a holopad as they go. Dooku is on his other side, on a comm call where both parties sound very tired.

And Obi-Wan is being held... by Obi-Wan.

So, yeah, not that great for a suddenly Smol Obi.

Now, Anakin is 8, so he's better off in that perspective.

But he wakes up on some remote planet without anyone around. He just was in the middle of a group, so he ends up kinda panicking.

Then he hears something coming towards him, and he panics more.

He's Tiny! He's Smol! He's massively at a disadvantage against attacks! He can't fight off whatever is on a planet like this!

It's Mace (and Depa).

Anakin, however, doesn't realize this. He has gone Feral.

Back to the beginning

Jango Fett has been very busy w/Important Mand'alor Paperwork all day. He finally has time to go and relax a little, and he makes it all the way down to the exit before he realizes:

It is really cold outside. He is not in armor bc he was planning to only do paperwork today (though he still has many weapons). When one plans to stay in the same room for almost the entire day, one does not wear normal garb.

That said, he has no protection from the cold. He forgot his jacket upstairs. He rushes back up to his office.

He distinctly remembers that he left the jacket on the back of his chair, not on the seat.

He also is wondering what that lump is.

He arms himself, grabs some of his "emergency" armor plating, and walks over to the chair.

He lifts his jacket up, expecting a bomb or some paperwork that fell off the desk, or something logical.

He does not expect to find a tiny Togruta child clinging onto the fabric, whining as they're woken up by his yanking of the jacket.

Jango's brain stutters for a moment, then he kicks into action.

First things first, he wraps the jacket around the Togruta. They thankfully stay asleep. Then he turns up the heat, because he knows the office has gotten colder in the twenty minutes or so he's been gone, and Togruta are from warm temperate zones.

He decides to call, in this order, a guard who can help him watch the Togruta (they did break in, after all), a medic to check the Togruta’s health, and the first person he can find in his contacts that might know an adult Togruta.

Next group

Rex and Cody manage to get the teen to stop fussing over them for long enough to ask for her name.

Her, clearly lying, but that’s understandable: My name is Ine.

Cody, who knows exactly who this is now: Oh, kriff. You’re Duchess Satine, aren’t you? Kriff.

Rex: Wait, Satine? As in the General’s Satine?

Satine, now very suspicious and reaching for her stunner: I think you need proper medical attention.

Cody, looking down at their eleven-year-old selves: Yeah, I think so, too.

They agree on one thing, at least.

Obi-Wan is crying. Loudly, uncontrollably, w/too many Emotions to even care that he’s supposed to be an adult rn.

Other Obi-Wan is very uncomfortable, bc he doesn’t know how to handle children too well.

They found this kid unconscious in the middle of a ruined, abandoned town.

Obi-Wan was meant to hold this kid while Qui-Gon did research and Master Dooku tried to convince the Council that it was entirely necessary to bring the kid back to Coruscant. Granted, they can still give the child to the locals at any time before they make it back to their ship, but apparently the Force is Being Loud.

The Force was Being Loud when it told Master Dooku to come along.

The Force was Being Loud when it led them to that town.

Qui-Gon and Dooku have argued fifteen and a half times on this mission, and an additional six times on the flight here. Obi-Wan is trying to mediate but also doesn’t want to overstep. The Force is Being Loud, sure, but the kid is also Force-sensitive so it might be something off that.

He didn’t argue with holding the kid bc he thought that it was better than being caught between the Masters.

Holding a crying child and trying to get two adults to stop arguing bc they can’t decide how to comfort the kid is not better.

Obi-Wan keeps walking past them to the ship with this baby. He does what he’s seen some crechemasters do to the younglings. The kid eventually calms a little, and he belatedly realizes that both Masters are still behind him, not with him.

Anakin is panakin.

He is currently in a state of Feralness. His instincts have kicked into overdrive, full-on Survival Mode.

Depa and Mace do not know this. All they know is that there was suddenly an extremely powerful Force presence that started fading quickly (bc Anakin started shielding).

They burst into sight of Anakin and are suddenly attacked by all four feet and some of Feral Force Child.

It’s all they can do for a good minute or so to avoid losing their fingers, eyes, or untorn clothes.

Mace puts a few things together very quickly.

This planet is uninhabited by any sapient life. Therefore, this child is utterly alone. This child also is clearly strong in the Force, and knows how to hide their presence, for whatever reasons. Mace is a Jedi, and therefore is bound by certain duties.

He decides it is his Duty to get this kid back to Coruscant safely.

Back to the beginning

Ahsoka wakes up to find a familiar face looking down at her. She’s still tired, but not as much. She’s very aware of her size, and does a few quick observations.

She does not fully know who Jango Fett is. She does know that some clones run off bc they hate war and weren’t given a choice an- no. Not going down that path yet.

Ahsoka assumes, semi-incorrectly, that she was shrunk or deaged and somehow found by a rogue clone.

She knows it’s a rogue clone bc they’ve got weird armor.

So she does the logical thing and tries to comfort this clone bc he looks really worried and kinda panicked. She stands up on the spinny chair and tries to balance and he practically lunges to help her and she can’t help but giggle, but it comes out in a bunch of chirps instead.

The clone picks her up and looks really awkward so she pats his face bc that’s the best she can do bc she doesn’t want to disprove the fact she’s two yet.

For all she knows, this rogue clone has no idea she’s actually a Commander in the GAR.

He doesn’t, but for different reasons than she thinks.

Rex and Cody go with Satine to the city. They have introduced themselves and said that they were separated from their aliit. They don't know where said aliit is.

Satine is highly suspicious by this point, bc these two kids recognized her with only part of her name, and they were alone, and they speak Basic with Mando'a thrown in.

Basically, she thinks that they're children of people like Death Watch, but she's too young to know that Death Watch isn't really into children.

Rex and Cody get checked over by a medic, but also start trying to get access to some working comms. They are refused on account of being suspicious children (which makes them a little upset bc they're not children)(Well, they are, but not those types of children)

They have not yet figured out that they are in the past, bc Cody and Rex only know that General Kenobi talks about Duchess Satine, and they know about Padme Amidala from General Skywalker, so clearly this Duchess is really young and the General simply viewed her as someone he wants to protect.

They are very very very wrong.

Obi-Wan manages to calm himself somewhat now that it's just him and... him.

He is three, and he knows roughly what's happening, so he knows he should probably act like a 3yo.

Unfortunately, he has very little understanding of how child ages work. 3 is smart enough to go up the stairs and communicate with adults, but def. not old enough to speak sentences that are 15 words long with at least 2 5-syllable words.

Fortunately, his older (younger?) self doesn't know children either.

So when this 3yo starts telling him that he needs to leave the two Masters on the planet and head to Tatooine really fast, Obi-Wan is more concerned about the idea than the strangeness of "this is a 3yo suggesting this".

Obi-Wan is really good at convincing people. Including himself. He manages to get Padawan Kenobi to leave supplies where the ship is supposed to be and head towards Tatooine.

He says that the Masters will be fine, they know how to survive, and they need to be alone together in order to work through all the tension. Plus, it gives them plenty of time to talk to the Council.

Toddler Kenobi also tells himself that he'll take the blow and say he used a mind-trick.

Padawan Kenobi doesn't believe him yet, but Toddler Kenobi smiles like a very smug adult and says "you'll get there eventually". What he truly means is up in the air.

Anakin, since waking up, knows much less than everyone else. Which is saying something.

He knows he's Smol. He knows he's Alone. He knows Someone has come and they are Strangers.

One thing about Anakin's instincts is that they are very much Survival Based. He was Feral when he joined the Jedi, only he had to hold those instincts back for most of his life bc of being a slave.

A slave cannot bite someone who approaches and Vibes Wrong.

By the time he felt okay with being Feral Out Loud, he also felt safe enough that he didn't need to activate his Survival Mode.

What I'm trying to say is that Anakin does not realize how strong his Feral Instincts are. He has absolutely no control over them rn.

When Mace decides to Help this child, this child is trying to Maul them.

Mace makes a small ruckus to draw Anakin's attention to him so Depa can move back. Depa pulls out her saber now that she won't hit the kid. The kid notices Purple and Bright and Lightsaber.

Lorge Jedi Mind says this is Good. Safe. Jedi.

Smol Feral Brain says this is Dangerous. Mean.

Anakin freezes on sight and just starts tracking Depa's saber. She does one of those things where a snake or something is focused and the person waves the fire or the food slowly to make sure the wolf is watching it and usually they toss the thing away so the snake follows it.

Mace instead takes this opportunity to wrap Anakin in his cloak. And Depa's cloak. And the spare ones in their bags.

Feral Child is not happy with this. Feral Child is also unable to scratch or Maul or do things other than bite and snarl.

Depa carries Feral Child while Mace comms the Temple and they walk back to their ship.

The Temple is having a field day.

First, one of their Shadows reports that a well-known bounty hunter got an emergency message from a pal of theirs that said Jango Fett needs help learning Togruta childcare.

Then they get a call from Dooku, which is not the mission report they wanted.

Yoda: Mission report, you have?

Dooku: Of a sort. We successfully spoke with the locals, then went to investigate a rather large disturbance.

Mundi: A disturbance?

Dooku: We found the source to be a Force-sensitive child.

Mundi: So you are here to ask for more time on the planet?

Dooku:...

Yoda: Bring the child back, you wish to?

Dooku, unapologetic: He is of an acceptable age to be admitted into the Temple, and no other beings were around at the time to entertain the idea of there being guardians.

The Council is sighing and muttering bc this is a Disaster Lineage (and they haven't even met the other two yet). Their call is interrupted by the sound of crying and Dooku saying the child's woken up.

Then there's another Shadow who sends a message saying a set of twins that seem like Death Watch were found by the heir of Clan Kryze.

Finally, to top everything off, they get a call from Mace Windu and Depa Billaba. Two very dignified, not-at-all chaotic Jedi from a perfectly respectable lineage.

Yeah, most of the Council and the Order itself forgets that Yoda had a hand in raising Windu. Yoda "Feral Grandpa" who throws children at every problem. Grandson isn't doing too well? Throw a child his way. Other grandchild is struggling to cope with grief? Throw another child their way. Oh, there's a war going on and newest grandchild is angry a lot? Here's a child!

The entire lineage has a soft spot for children.

Anyways...

Mace: Our mission was a success. We found the artifact and both specimens.

Koth: How long until your return?

Mace:...

Yoda: Found a child, you did?

Gallia: Master Yoda, that's a rather illogical guess. Once is unusual, twice is-

Mace: Oh, did Qui-Gon find a child as well?

Yoda, smugly: Bringing the child back, are you?

Depa, from the background, after a rather loud snarl is heard: We do not bite things, young one.

*more snarling*

Mace: We have no reason to believe he was not alone.

Tiin: *deep sighing*

Mundi: *mild confusion noises*

Koon, eagerly: Please send photos of this youngling. For the archives, of course.

Mace, nodding sagely: Of course.

*extremely loud yowl* *sounds of Mace turning*

Mace: DEPA!

Depa: He nearly bit off my finger!

Mace: That doesn’t mean you pinch him!

Depa: What else am I supposed to do?!

*sudden exclamation filled solely of Mando’a, Huttese and Twi’leki curses*

Mace: So, I don’t know if he speaks Basic, but Master Che should be able to talk him through a check-up.

Yeah, several Council members are experiencing headaches now. Normally, they would have some empathy for Mace and his own stress-induced migraines. They currently do not.

Right after that call, Dooku calls back to say that Obi-Wan has left without them.

Mundi: He left the child with you, right?

Dooku:

Mundi: He left the child with you, right?

Obi-Wan did not leave himself with the Masters. Obi-Wan has listened to Mini-Obi and is off on some wild space adventure to a criminal-run planet.

The toddler won’t stop staring at him. He asks for a name. The kid says to call him Ben.

OW: Is that your name?

“Ben”: It is a name I am called :)

OW: That isn’t what I meant.

“Ben”: I know :)

Ben also keeps staring at OW’s lightsaber. OW decides to make sure the kid doesn’t start playing with it when he isn’t looking.

MEANWHILE

Ahsoka has figured out that she was really very oh-so wrong. She’s on Mandalore. As in, the Mandalore that is under Jango Fett. Bc she’s with Jango Fett. He’s holding her hand bc she was nervous about the strange looking medic (who was just wearing armor, but not clone armor and civies don’t wear armor.)

Ahsoka knows very little about Jango Fett. Clone Buir, Mandalorian leader, tried to kill Master Kenobi. Also dead.

He asks how she got in. She shrugs. She is too small to fight back so she can’t let him know anything. Whatever everything is right now. But also, he doesn’t seem mean or evil or anything.

Oh yeah. Skyguy said that Mandos love children. That's why the clones were so protective of her, even with Skyguy on her side of the argument.

She decides to use this to her advantage. She can probably get herself a comm, and enough time to call the Temple. If she can convince them she at least knows a Jedi, then they can come get her and she'll work from there.

ELSEWHERE

Rex and Cody are getting really upset. This Duchess is really nice, but she's acting really weird and keeps insisting she's not actually called Duchess. No one will give them a comm, they keep getting weird looks for speaking Mando'a even though they're on Mandalore, and Satine's father keeps mentioning a Fett. Maybe Boba's set a bad example again.

Rex starts to fall asleep, to his chagrin. He's too bored, sitting and getting some abnormally extensive check-up. Cody is fine, but he's used to the calm that is General Kenobi. Rex usually has a Togruta teen in the vents and a Human that is never where he's supposed to be.

Rex does, in fact, fall asleep. His "twin" starts glaring when a doctor goes to wake him up. Cody makes it clear that his brother is like Cat: once asleep, you do not wake.

Satine is giggling, but trying not to let the others hear. Cody does. Cody looks at her. They have a stare-off.

Cody goes back to glaring at the doctors. He will not admit to any emotions besides Protect™.

BACK TO

Obi-Wan and Ben have made it to Tatooine.

#star wars #star wars fic #another star wars au #obi-wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #kote fett #cody fett #rex fett #cody #rex #ahsoka tano #disaster lineage #mace windu #depa billaba #jango fett #duchess satine #time travel #deaging

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poisoned-peppermint · 3 years ago

Text

Part 4 of incorrect quotes because i feel obligated to make more due to the sheer number of people who liked it

Dream: My dearest beloved fuckos, is a fun, gender-neutral way to begin a speech

George: See also, esteemed bastards

Bad: Gentlefolk, Ferals, and Domesticated cryptids.

Sapnap: My fellow yees and haws

~~~~~~~

Techno:Hey I know skyrim is revered as a classic but are we just going to ignore the fact that the entire game only had like 3 voice actors

Wilbur:Stop right there criminal cum

Techno:My ancestors are smiling at me, bastard, can you say the same

~~~~~~~

Foolish:When's your bedtime :)

Purpled: Whenever I next collapse in purely up to the gods

~~~~~~

Ranboo:Human skin is a fursuit for skeletons

Tubbo: i’m going to debone you like a fucking trout

~~~~~~

Bad:You’re enough

Bad: love yourself!!!!!!! or suffer my wrath!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dream:And by wrath I mean love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bad:no I mean wrath!!!!! You reading this, if you don't love yourself I’ll beat you with a stick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~~~~~~~

Bad:I hope everyone is today well! And tomorrow!!!! After that you’re on your own.

~~~~~~

Bad:what am I supposed to do all day while you’re at work

Skeppy:I don’t know, what do you normally do while I’m gone

Bad: wait for you to get back

~~~~~~

Velvet:For my next stunt, I’ll wake up at 5am on the day I can sleep in

Ant:Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.

Velvet:Early to bed and early to rise makes me a massive bitch

~~~~~~

Tubbo: 3:23 AM make a wish

Ranboo: I wish that you would go to sleep

Tuddo: Yeah well I wish I grew an inch taller every day as you get an inch shorter until you’re as flat as as a piece of paper and I’m 11 feet tall

Ranboo: You’re going to die of a mixture of skeletal instability and heart disease.

Tubbo: Yeah but I’ll look good while doing it.

~~~~~~

Bad:Disrespect me again and I’ll determine your bodies resonant frequency and play a jaunty horn solo that boils your miserable organs inside out

~~~~~~

Quackity: If I were dating you? Well, heh. Let’s just say horses wouldn't be called horses anymore

Karl: hey what the honk does this mean…..I’m shaking what does this mean!

~~~~~~

Skeppy: Are you ok?

Bad wrapped in a burrito blanket drinking his 6th cup of coffee: Yes, this is exactly what mental stability looks like

~~~~~~

Sam: My hands are cold

Ponk: *holds their hands*

Ponk: better?

Sam: My lips are cold too

~~~~~~

George at dream’s funeral: can I have a moment alone with them?

Sapnap: of course *leaves*

George leaning over dream’s casket: Now listen, I know you’re not dead.

Dream: yeah no shit

~~~~~~

Skeppy, jokingly: I should have Bad kill you for that.

Bad, peering around the corner: Who do I need to kill?

Skeppy: Wh- no, I was just kidding around.

Bad, pulling out a switchblade: No, who’s bothering you

~~~~~~

Bad *watching the news*: Some idiot tried to fight a squid at the aquarium.

Skeppy *covered in ink*: Maybe the squirt was being a dick.

~~~~~~

Peacock: *spreads feathers at Bad*

Skeppy: It’s trying to attract a mate

Bad, extremely confused: *shyly lifts top*

Skeppy: No!

~~~~~~

Sapnap: Karl, do you eat olives? My dad wants to know

Karl: No, I hate olives. Olives are the spawn of satan. I hate olives so much my mom forced me to live in Mount olive for the rest of my childhood as a curse from the olive gods. Do you understand how much olives have ruined my life? I'm so offended that you asked me that have some consideration for people who have been abused by olives please!

Sapnap: K A R L ……….they’re just olives!!?

Karl: JUST OLIVES EXCUSE!

~~~~~~

Tommy: If you’re bored you can simply close your eyes and rotate a cow in your mind. It’s free and the cops can’t stop you

~~~~~~

Wilbur: is there anyone even named sheldon irl?

Tubbo: my class turtle from 6th grade :)

Wilbur: that’s a turtle

Tubbo: When god sings with his creations, will a turtle not be part of the choir?

~~~~~~

Ranboo: No bcuz why do ppl like salad?? What’s so good about it

Tubbo: chew leaf like god intended

Ranboo: No

Tubbo: Abandon god and see what he does next time you lift your hands in prayer

~~~~~~~

Tommy: Guys, there’s a monster under my bed and it’s really ugly.

Wilbur, on the bottom bunk: Honestly, fuck you.

~~~~~~

Quackity: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can’t ‘legally’ be a lawyer if your license is ‘cut out of a cereal box’.

~~~~~~

Puffy: If you had too, what would you give up food or sex?

Bad: Sex.

Skeppy: Seriously, answer faster.

Bad: I’m sorry honey, when they said sex I wasn’t thinking about sex with you.

Skeppy: It’s like a giant hug.

Puffy: Ant, what about you? What would you give up sex or food?

Ant: Food.

Puffy: Okay, how about sex or dinosaurs?

Ant: ……...Oh my God it’s like the movie Sophie’s Choice.

Gumi: What about you Velvet? What would you give up sex or food?

Velvet: Oh… um… I don’t know, it’s too hard.

Gumi: No, you gotta pick one.

Velvet: Um, food… no, sex… no, food…sex… food. Ugh! I don’t know! I want both! I- I want Antfrost on bread!

~~~~~~~

Tommy, holding a gun: If the conspiracies about life being a simulation are true WHOEVERS CONTROLLING MY SIM I JUST WANNA TALK.

~~~~~~~

Bad: Why are you guys acting like this?

Boomer: Oh, we’re not acting. We really are like this.

~~~~~~

Techno: Dream has only knocked me out three times this week. Our friendship is really developing.

~~~~~~

Tommy: You’re pathetic!

Wilbur: You’re pathetic-er!

Techno: You’re both losers.

~~~~~~

Bad: I wish I could help you, but I shorn’t.

Skeppy: Bad, please!

Bad: What part of shorn’t don’t you understand?

~~~~~~

Tubbo: Why did you leave Wrestlemania on for Michal?

Ranboo: They need to learn how to protect us.

~~~~~~

Antfrost: I regret getting dragged into your heterosexual tomfoolery.

~~~~~~

Bad: Strawberry milk doesn’t taste like strawberry OR milk.

Skeppy: Go the fuck to sleep Bad!

Bad: LANGUAGE!!

~~~~~~

Ranboo: Tubbo, please calm down.

Tubbo: I asked for two large fries!

Tubbo: *dumps fries onto table*

Tubbo: But all they did was give me a MILLION FUCKING LITTLE ONES!

~~~~~~

Bad: That was the worst throw ever. Of all time.

Skeppy: Not my fault. Somebody put a wall in the way.

~~~~~~

Wilbur: When you’ve been on the internet for as long as I have, you develop thick skin.

Tommy: Navy blue isn’t your color.

Wilbur: Navy blue brings out my eyes you prick! *Chases after Tommy*

~~~~~~

Bad: *Pulls a glass a water from out of nowhere*

Puffy: Where did you get that?.

Bad: My pocket.

Puffy: How do you keep a glass of water in your pocket?

Bad: Skills.

~~~~~~

Tubbo: I will come to your house after work and knock on your window at 11 AM. You will not open the curtains, knowing full well what awaits you, but the knocking only grows louder, more demanding. Finally it stops, your ears ringing. You nervously let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. You're safe now. Minutes pass by and you start to relax. And then you hear a knock at the front door. Like before, you stay still and clutch the blankets around you. You try to tell your self that it's just your imagination. Maybe the milk man? But why would he come so late? Everyone else was asleep, save for Naomi who was playing video games down stairs. To your relief, the knocking stops after a few. Minutes and you breath easy once more. Until you hear a knock on your bedroom door. You don't move. It's just your imagination. She isn't here. She can't be here. You tell yourself, shutting your eyes and willing yourself to sleep. The knock comes again, but with horror you realize that it came from the closet inside your room. You know that you have no choice. You get up, climbing out of bed with shaking limbs. You walk to the closest, trembling, and holding back the tears threatening to spill over your porcelain cheeks. You hesitate with your hand over the closet handle. Maybe it's just your imagination? She's not really there. You can go to sleep and laugh it off in the morning. Your naive thoughts are cut off by another, more demanding knock on the closet door, inches from your face. You know what you have to do. You open the closet door, and there she stands. Chuck e cheese, the mouse looms over you in the dim light. It's soulless eyes boor into you. It raises its arms, and you flinch as it begins to floss at lightning speed. Tears spill over your cheeks. This is the last thing you'll ever see.

Ranboo: Wait, Chuck e cheese’s pronouns are she/her? Trans Chuck e cheese? Good for her.

~~~~~~~~

Bad: Would you like something to drink? *They opened the fridge* We have water, milk, juice, spiders, Dr. Pepper-

Quackity: Spiders?

Bad: Spiders it is then.

Quackity: No, that wasn’t-

*But they were already pouring him a brimming glass of spiders…

~~~~~~

Puffy : Make her pussy wet not her eyes.

Velvet : Make his dick hard not his life.

Punz : Break her bed not her heart.

Skeppy : Play with his boobs not his feelings.

Ant : Get on his dick not his nerves.

Bad : Always salt your pasta while boiling it.

~~~~~~~

Wilbur: Bet you can’t eat 15 crayons!

Tommy: Bet you I can!

Phil: *sips coffee, checks to make sure 911 is still on speed dial, and goes back to reading the paper*

~~~~~~~

Ant: We need a way to lure in new customers?

Ponk: Maybe we could have some fun, interactive events!

Skeppy: Badboyhalo bath water.

Bad: ABSOLUTELY NOT!

~~~~~~~~

Fundy: GET BACK HERE YOU DUMB FUCK!

Wilbur: LET ME RUN FROM THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS!

~~~~~~~~

Bad: Mint is just cold spicy.

Pummel party Squad: …

Gumi: What the actual fuck is wrong with you.

~~~~~~~~

Quackity: Isn’t it amazing how I can feel so bad and still look so good?

~~~~~~~

Tommy: Why does my arm shake and turn bright red when I’m eating dirt?

Phil:

Phil: Why are you eating dirt?

Tommy: Did I ask you if I should eat dirt? No, so answer my question.

~~~~~~~

Tubbo: I wish I could control wasps and bees to sting my enemies.

Quackity: You’re too young to have enemies.

Tubbo: You don’t even know.

~~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Is there a cactus where your heart should be?

Puffy: What’s up your ass this morning!

Bad: *walks in* …Hi!!

Puffy: Hmm… nevermind.

Skeppy: WAIT NO!

~~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Ha! Don’t you know the trappers trap can trap the trapper?

Skeppy: I must be losing it, I’m quoting Bad.

~~~~~~~

Skeppy: Bad, I sense hostility.

Bad: Good, because I hate you

~~~~~~~

Bad: Are you a painting?

Skeppy: What-?

Bad: Because I want to pin you to a wall.

Skeppy: OH GOD I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO SAY YOU WANTED TO HANG ME OR SOMETHING-

~~~~~~

Tommy: You’re giving me a sticker?

Phil: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying “me-wow!”

Tommy: I’m not a preschooler.

Phil: Fine, I’ll take it back-

Tommy: I earned this, back off!

~~~~~~

Dream, sweating: George, there’s something I need to ask you-

George: Finally! You’re proposing!

Dream: How’d you know?

George: Dream, you’ve dropped the ring five times during dinner.

George: I even picked it up once

~~~~~~~~

*Bad and Skeppy looking at a locked gate into a park*

Bad: Aw. :(

Skeppy: You know what they say.

Bad: Please don’t-

Skeppy: BE GAY DO CRIME! *hops gate*

Bad: Frick-

~~~~~~~~

let me know if ya’ll want more <3

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mrpenguinpants · 4 years ago

Text

Genshin: Roommate HCs [V1]

To be honest, I just wanted to ramble some more and let my brainworms take over. This is sorta late but Happy Valentine’s everyone! I was gonna post this earlier but this honestly took me a long time to write so I moved it to today.

Once again, this is 90% crack 10% content. Seriously, as much as I love writing this non-serious fics. Why do you people like this?

—

Based off my ramblings with Keqing anon: Link

Genshin: Holding Hands [V1]

Genshin: When you’re cold [V1]

Genshin: University AU [V1]

Genshin: Royalty AU [V1]

[Masterlist]

—

[taglist] <- if you want to be added, please read this first.

@youaskedfurret @diaxfeliz @wintergreen-aix @kaechu @thegayrubberducky @lovelykittycatmeow @yuunoagivesmelife @dokidokisama @rokipersonal@minakohasmanyhusbandos @strwbrry-lia @tigerpriestess @yuu-yuukurotsuki @hanniejji @mikeysbike @unionwitch @musekala @sunnshiii @stanzastic @akaasea @xoneaboveallx @adoring-ghost @asheseiler @childelover @dilucsz @dai-tsukki-desu @thicmitten @nonniechan @htnicayh @genshins1mpact

---

Diluc

What? Diluc has a roommate? Did you blackmail him in living with you? Is that even possible? Did you throw yourself in front of his car because you needed someone to pay for your student loans and the easiest way was to file a lawsuit? In this economy no one would blame you. Diluc seems like such the self-isolated character that would murder his roommate in cold blood but in reality, he act’s detached from the world because he forgot how to socialize and he’s desperately trying to cover it up without choking. That or he’s trying to learn how to astral project. If he could drink away the pain he would but instead he buys 20 packs of grape Kool-Aid and injects it into his veins.

Does not and will not ever have a normal sleeping schedule. You’ll wake up to him working, come back home to him working, and will sleep to him still working. His daily dose of Vitamin D is from the brightness of his screen rather than the sun and he’s filter feeding at this point. It’s concerning. He’s going to crumble and he’s bringing the world down with him. Through the power of tax evasion. But as soon as he needs to walk out into society, he pulls movie magic and looks like perfection. It’s both physically and mentally disgusting.

He’s actually is a really nice roommate to have just so long as you give him space. Great cook and knows to clean up after himself. Though he does have crash and burn days where’s he’s completely out of commission. You could set the entire apartment on fire and he would sleep through it. The entire two weeks are dedicated to zombie eye marathons and then he’ll suddenly collapse and sleep for 46 hours straight. When he wakes up from his hibernation he’s the most groggy and nonsensical person. His life blood is coffee because you keep hiding the 5 hour energy away from him because, you know, life is enjoyable and those cancer bottles will actually kill him.

“University sucks our money out of our bodies faster than our will to live.”

Beidou [Happy Birthday Queen 💕]

Despite her appearance, she’s actually really strong and it scares the piss out of you when you’re doing something or scrolling through your phone mindlessly and you suddenly get your spine re-arranged when she slaps you on the back to ask what you’re doing. Likewise, when she hoists you up and throws you over her shoulder so you come with her on her 3am convivence store raids for alcohol. It’s either you change now or else we’re walking out of the apartment in your t-shirt and no pants self. She can and will carry you under her arm that way. It’s both incredibly attractive and horrifying at the same time.

She’s really friendly and a great talker if you’re alright with her “I must hold you in my arms, fresh prince of bel air style”. It doesn’t matter if you’re taller than her, she’s doing it. She does however, get in a bit of trouble from her rowdiness and you often get noise complaints but Beidou just passes them off to Ningguang and everything is fixed. She has ovaries of steel when neighbors rather confront her personally and she’s ready to 1v1 in the parking lot. You’re trying to desperately hold onto her shirt to stop her from pile driving your neighbors for the third time this week but she’s too strong.

She’s constant party until we die attitude and suffers the hangover in the morning. It’s actually really funny to catch her in her hangover moods because whatever filter Beidou had, which is none, is gone. She really takes “cursing like a sailor” or the next level and the amount of creativity she comes up with is actually impressive. She can be a bit messy but she’s really likeable and always down to go anywhere with you as long as you’ll do the same. It’s a very ride together, we die together situation. You’re my best friend, you’re dying with me. I’ll see you in hell.

“Imma T pose over my dad and then crash the car into the parking garage.”

Kaeya

Kaeya on the surface seems like such a chill roommate. And he is for the most part. But he’s such an ass. Your things are his things, no questions asked. If you just bought a really nice sweater or you had leftover food, that’s his now. He’s innocent until proven guilty even if he’s literally holding your lunch. The pure amount of bullshit he can spit out to convince you that no, he did not pull the fire alarm because he wanted an excuse for not going to work, puts him on Shakespeare level. He’s also very pretty, way too pretty, sir can you share some of your genes?

But aside from that, he’s actually super dependable. You forgot something at home? Sure, he has nothing better to do so he can bring them for you. We’re missing eggs? No problem, he’s just by the store. You’re 95% sure that he just wants to be cheeky and make you thank him for 20 minutes before he actually hands you what you asked for. It’s better for you if you never tell him anything you’re afraid of because Kaeya has no social cues, or more like he throws them out the window, and he’s probably a psychopath.

He’s incredibly private of his room and things despite his attitude towards yours. You’re convinced he either has a secret lab or that’s where he’s storing the bodies. I was the good guy but due to unfortunate circumstances, I need to stab a bitch. But he’s a really good serious talker for those 3am, because everything happens at 3am, talks about life and the meaning of the universe. It absolutely wrecks your sleep schedule but some of the things you talk about are the most crackhead things like what’s the lowest amount of money someone would have to pay you to walk outside without clothes? It’s a legitimate question.

“Never before have I been so offended with something I 100% agree with.”

Jean

Okay, what world did you save in a past life to live with his absolutely wonderful woman? Mother Teresa take a load off, take a seat. You have nothing to worry about. She’ll bring home little treats back home and it’s the most wholesome thing ever?? Is this what love and affection feels like? We’ve been starved for so long. She says it’s not a big deal and anyone would do it BUT THE MOMENT SOMEONE BUYS FOOD FOR YOU. IT’S A MAGICAL MOMENT. They are forever stuck in your will until proven otherwise. An absolute ray of sunshine that must be protected.

She does get super busy so you don’t often see each other or get to hang out as much. She’s a bit of a workaholic but a lot more easier to talk her into taking a break. She’s also a pretty decent cook but she prefers baking and jesus christ, girl can you calm down? Be still my beating heart, I’ve been smitten. Has mother hen vibes that you’re not sure if she’s your roommate or if she adopted you into her family. It’s time to start a petition for the Jean protection squad. Given the opportunity, I would aggressively hold your hand.

She’s always open to whatever you want to do. Any recommendations or things that you like she will try out at least once despite her busy schedule. She’s lowkey lonely because work consumes her so any time you want to hang out or do something together, she jumps on it like she’s feral. She get’s a bit shy to ask if she can join in on your plans because she doesn’t want to bother you or intrude no matter how many times you tell her that’s okay, she still get’s a bit iffy about it. Please save this girl before she trips. In your arms. Platonically. Just kidding haha. Unless?

“I can’t wait to see you happy and not hating everyone again haha.”

Childe

First impressions of Childe were great, until he opened his mouth and you realized how much of a two brain cell child(e) he was. He has two braincells because they constantly have to 1v1 in his brain. He’s lived with a lot of siblings so he has no social awareness or concept of privacy that you’re lucky if you come home and he’s half-dressed. It doesn’t matter if you’re 2 weeks older than him, he’s going to call you 82 years old and why your bones aren’t being fossilized at this point. He’s such a little shit, this fucker licks the yogurt lid peel.

He get’s really restless when he’s stuck under house arrest, because apparently 1v1ing in the parking lot of a Wendy’s is illegal for some reason, so he makes dying whale noises until he get’s to go outside again. But he’s actually a really wholesome guy, probably because of his younger siblings, that he’ll sometimes get you something because you seemed down and it’s such whiplash? Who is this man and where did he come from? You’re starting to have a change of heart before he tells you that he got banned from the library for accidently punching the school’s computer. How you “accidently” punch something you have no idea but Childe always comes home with some sort of injury. Maybe he’s just incredibly clumsy. For your sanity, you’re going to go with that.

He’s actually so uncultured that it’s crippling. You can’t blame him too much considering his upbringing and it’s great that he’s so interested in learning new things but...child no...It makes you want to take your spine out of your ass and rip it like a Beyblade. Watching him take chopsticks and stab his food like it’s marshmallows makes you want to fall into a blackhole and let the chair consume you.

“I, too, fantasize about beating the living shit out of people.”

---

Is this another tag yourself game cause I resonate with Diluc. I’m crying in insomnia. As much as I enjoy writing these fics I absolutely hate tagging them. I remember I used to have a tag anon but that was back when I wrote for bnha.

Valentine’s Day was fun tho. I had a drinking game with friends as we played league then ended it off with a movie night.

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guqin-and-flute · 4 years ago

Text

Episode 73: Koala Chlamydia Is A Problem [My Brothers, My Sister and Me Excerpt]

[MBMSAM AU] [First Installment] [Podfics!] [Ao3 Link]

[COVER ART BY THE FANTASTIC LITTLESMARTART]

Jin Zixuan: Do we want another question?

Qin Su: Sure, yeah, got one right here. 'When I was younger, I was really skinny and weak'--hey! Hey, now, negative body talk, much! That's super judgmental of yourself!

Mo Xuanyu: And of us people who are skinny and weak right now! [teasing] Right, Yao-gege?

Meng Yao: [calmly] I'm not affiliated with you.

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [cackles]

Qin Su: 'When I was a kid, I was really skinny and weak, so I made it my mission to get as jacked as possible so people would take me seriously. I put in a lot of hard work, changed my exercise routine and diet and it worked. But now, as an adult I'm a 6 foot 7 dude--'

Jin Zixuan: [incredulous] 6 foot 7 ?

Qin Su: Just a mountain of a man. '--6 foot 7 dude with serious muscle mass--'

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: [sotto voce] Good God .

Qin Su: '-- and a pretty intense resting face. I routinely make children cry just by existing and everyone shoots me nervous looks in the grocery store. It gets to me sometimes. I’m not a bad guy! I just look scary. What are some ways that I can make myself less intimidating?’

Mo Xuanyu: Huh.

Qin Su: I mean, let’s see...puppies are unintimidating. Can you devise a system where you carry a few around with you at all times? Maybe in some saddle bags, everywhere you go?

Mo Xuanyu: The movies, the gym, on dates… .

Jin Zixuan: Sure, until they start pissing down your legs. Then you’re not just unintimidating, you’re the guy no one wants to stand next to at the bus stop.

Meng Yao: I mean, it still does the job, doesn’t it?

Mo Xuanyu: You could get a butterfly tattoo, like, directly on your forehead.

Meng Yao: Okay, please explain to me your thought process on how exactly that would make anyone more approachable.

Qin Su: They still want to be able to navigate human society, A-Yu.

Mo Xuanyu: Ew, why?

Jin Zixuan: Let’s see...what makes someone approachable….Who is the least intimidating of all of us?

Qin Su: [immediately] You.

Meng Yao: [affirming] Mm.

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: [incredulous] What?

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: Oh yeah, you’re like...you’re like a poodle. Or a--

Jin Zixuan: [highly offended] Excuse me! I'm the oldest and definitely the tallest one here!

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [ill concealed snort]

[crosstalk] Qin Su: [pityingly] Oh, da- ge .

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: Or a golden retriever.

Qin Su: Please don't tell me you think that being tall translates into you actually being scary. You’re tallest by, like, 3 inches. At most, that’s just part of the equation of being scary.

Meng Yao: And the rest of Zixuan’s equation is just filled with collared polo shirts. Which absolutely tanks the intimidation ratio.

Mo Xuanyu: That doesn't tank yours, though.

Meng Yao: I wear button downs. It’s not the same. [Vaguely disgusted undertone] Collared polos.

Jin Zixuan: Excuse you, polos are weekend wear and there is nothing wrong-- I can be intimidating!

Qin Su: [doubtfully] Ehhhhh…

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [badly stifled snickers]

[crosstalk]Jin Zixuan: I can! Just because I’ve never had to intimidate you --

Qin Su: Let's just say; citation needed

Mo Xuanyu: Please, jiejie has you beat.

Jin Zixuan: [indignant] Wha--

[crosstalk] Qin Su: He's right, gege; an unopened jar of mayonnaise has you beat. And I'm no unopened jar of mayonnaise.

Mo Xuanyu: That shit is opened .

Meng Yao: That’s a Tinder profile quote.

Qin Su: What? 'Spicier than mayo?'

Mo Xuanyu: [half singing, half chanting] ‘My mayo brings all the boys to the yard, and they’re like-- [normal voice] this is really underwhelming.’

Meng Yao: [musing] ‘Saltier than soy sauce, spicier than mayo….’

Qin Su: Why do we always come back to food? Are our Skype calls haunted by starving Victorian ghost children? Are we possessed?

Mo Xuanyu: [mournful, high pitched, bad British accent] ‘My name is Bartholemew and I’m starving. Please, spare some mayo.’

Meng Yao: It’s your own fault if none of you bother to eat before we record. You all had the schedule.

Mo Xuanyu: [crunches loudly near mic]

Meng Yao: [falsely happy] Hey, thanks! Thank you so much, A-Yu, love the level spike on that one. Editing mouth noises out of our podcast makes my day brighter.

Jin Zixuan: [under his breath] Just...unbelievable….You all….

Qin Su: [smiling] I think we broke him.

Meng Yao: [laughing] Zixuan is limping behind the conversation indignantly, brandishing his cane….

Mo Xuanyu: [sympathetically] Awww.

Jin Zixuan: I--! I am a high powered businessman! I am trained in martial arts and archery and swordsmanship --

Mo Xuanyu: [mouth full] Oh please, gege, you’re a pod caster.

Jin Zixuan: [forcefully] I am a CEO--

[crosstalk] Qin Su: [ignoring him] I think Yao-gege is somehow the most and least intimidating out of all of us at the same time, if we're all being completely honest with ourselves and our place in the world.

Mo Xuanyu: Aww, I thought I was at least a contender!

Qin Su: Honey, you're feral. There's a difference.

Mo Xuanyu: What does a kid have to do around here to be intimidating?

Meng Yao: Learn how to chew with your mouth closed, for one.

Jin Zixuan: [indignantly] A-Yao? Are you not going to deny this?

[Brief silence]

Meng Yao: [calmly] I don't think I'm scary.

Qin Su & Mo Xuanyu: [instant uproarious laughter]

Jin Zixuan: Oh, come on! He's like...a little koala bear or something! How is that scary!

Meng Yao: [offended] Excuse me--

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [still laughing] I’m gonna pee --

Meng Yao: -- koalas have smooth brains and eat poisonous leaves all day. Are you calling me a poisonous idiot bear?

Qin Su: [wheezes] Only in private.

Mo Xuanyu: [laughter trailing off] Wait, wait, hold on. Don’t all koalas have chlamydia or something?

Qin Su: [renewed laughter]

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [startled laugh] What?

Mo Xuanyu: Chlamydia! I think that I read--!

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Oh my god, I think I’ve actually heard that. The plague, the bubonic plague, isn’t it? Or that--Some sort of--that disease people used to get where bits of you fall off?

Qin Su: Beheadings?

Meng Yao: [voice strangled from laughter] Yes, A-Su, that ancient disease the French Revolution that all koalas have--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: [snickering]

Mo Xuanyu: [loud and close to mic] LEPROSY .

[crosstalk] Qin Su: Ow--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Holy shit--

Mo Xuanyu: It’s leprosy and you’re thinking of armadillos, da-ge.

Jin Zixuan: [muttering] Aren’t we all….

Qin Su: [solemnly] Armadillos and guillotines. Every damn minute of every damn day.

Mo Xuanyu: And I googled it, I’m right; koala chlamydia is a problem.

Meng Yao: And we’ve just found the title of this episode.

Qin Su: If most koalas have chlamydia, I feel like they have other problems they have to deal with.

Mo Xuanyu: Those pesky, promiscuous koalas!

Qin Su: Get them some damn sex ed! Use those eucalyptus leaves for protection!

Meng Yao: [pleasantly] That’s just about the worst thing I’ve heard all day.

Mo Xuanyu: Eugh, that menthol, though. Like Vicks for your dicks!

Meng Yao: I hate it.

[crosstalk]Jin Zixuan: [pained] PSA: don’t do that. Ever.

Qin Su: The voice of experience?

Jin Zixuan: I don’t think you actually want an answer to that, meimei.

Meng Yao: You people make me hate learning and also knowing things.

Mo Xuanyu: Also I've been looking it up and mountain lions are the ones that can have the bubonic plague.

Meng Yao: Choose your fighter; chlamydia ridden koala, leprosy ridden armadillo, or mountain lion with the Black Death.

Qin Su: Well, at least the mountain lion could inflict some damage. Use it like a poison delivery system, like an anthrax letter to secretly infect people.

Meng Yao: [patient teacher tone] ‘A mountain lion is to an anthrax letter, like a koala is to a…?’

Qin Su: [mock frustration] Oh, man, I know this one….

Mo Xuanyu: 'I can't come into school today, I got attacked by a mountain lion.'

Qin Su: [acting concerned] 'Oh my God, are you okay? Are you gonna have scars?'

Mo Xuanyu: 'Worse. The Plague .'

Jin Zixuan: Okay, glad we got our animal infections all sorted out--back to what we were talking about. So, riddle me this--

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [delighted, Riddlemancer voice] Rrrriddle Me Piss, kids--!

[crosstalk] Meng Yao & Qin Su: NO!

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Oh my god --

Mo Xuanyu: [laughing] I don't actually have anything today--

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: A blessing .

Mo Xuanyu: --but I'll get you next time.

Jin Zixuan: No, I need to know, genuinely, this is not a bit-- why do you think A-Yao scarier than me?

Qin Su: I mean, what's not scary about a smooth brained bear full of toxins and chlamydia?

Meng Yao: [disgruntled] Uh huh.

Mo Xuanyu: Technically, they’re not bears, they're marsupials! And I think Yao-gege is more of an armadillo--hard on the outside--

[slight crosstalk] Qin Su: --And full of leprosy on the inside.

Meng Yao: [further from mic, keyboard tapping] 'And to Mo Xuanyu...and Qin Su...I leave... absolutely nothing, except...this bag of dog shit and...spiders…..'

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [laughing]

[crosstalk] Qin Su: Awww, A-Yu, we're being written out of his will again!

Jin Zixuan: Listeners, am I wrong? Am I crazy? He’s the size of a toddler--

[slight crosstalk] Meng Yao: [still away from mic, keyboard tapping] ‘And to Jin Zixuan...I leave--’

Jin Zixuan: He looks like a sugar glider baby that got turned into a human man--

[slight crosstalk] Meng Yao: ‘This box...of useless...tetanus filled screws….’

Qin Su: Da-ge--

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: ‘--that i...encourage him to use…--’

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [snickering]

Meng Yao: ‘As acupuncture needles.’ There. Sent to the notary. Now, what were we talking about, again?

Qin Su: Da-ge, all those things might be true--

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [flatly] Wow.

Qin Su: But here’s a test. What would you do to someone picking on A-Yu in school?

Jin Zixuan: [immediate, sounding businesslike and slightly aggressive] I would contact their parents and set up a meeting with the school officials and make it very clear that they are never to do that again.

Qin Su: [grinning] Okay. Yao-gege, what would you do to someone picking on A-Yu in school?

Meng Yao: [calmly] Absolutely nothing you could prove in a court of law.

Mo Xuanyu: [bursts out laughing]

[crosstalk] Qin Su: I mean--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Uhhhh--

Qin Su: You see? Also-- [quick sing-song voice] 🎵 This is a joke, for legal reasons, this is a joke 🎵 [normal voice] He’s got that--that--

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [lingering laughter] Yeah, it's that menace. Da-ge, you’re like--you’re like if a duckling--okay, you remember when I brought you to Hot Topic? You were like a duckling at a Death Metal concert.

Jin Zixuan: [defensively] The music was so loud--

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [pityingly] Oh, Zixuan.

Qin Su: You're like if a golf course got turned into a human.

Meng Yao You're what would happen if you gave mac and cheese a social security card and keys to a lamborghini.

Jin Zixuan: [unamused] Okay.

Mo Xuanyu: [laughing] You're the lightly salted almonds of people.

Qin Su: You're like a wholesome Hallmark movie fucked the concept of the suburbs.

Jin Zixuan: [unamused] Sure. Sure.

Meng Yao: You emanate the peril of a box of lethargic kittens.

Jin Zixuan: Wow. My own family. This is coming from the physical manifestation of a My Chemical Romance song--

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [smug] You say that like it’s a bad thing.

Jin Zixuan: -- and the woman who cries at the Land Before Time every time she watches it. I think this is a case of glass houses, here. Let ye who are intimidating...

Qin Su: Oh, so we’re not roasting Yao-gege back?

Meng Yao: Not sure how me being compared to a STD riddled marsupial for about 5 minutes straight escaped your notice, A-Su, but alright.

Jin Zixuan: I feel that you are all being...heinously short sighted, here. Are you seriously trying to tell me that A-Yu is scarier than me, a full grown man?

Meng Yao: I would certainly be more warranted in my concern about him stabbing me than I would about you.

Mo Xuanyu: Oh my God, gege, that was like 5 years ago and I already said I was sorry--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: [loudly] What--

[crosstalk] Qin Su: Did we actually help this person? I mean--

Mo Xuanyu: We always help, jiejie.

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Hold on--

Qin Su: We learned a lot about exactly how disturbing the animal kingdom is, but….

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: No, go back--

[slight crosstalk] Meng Yao: Dress like a middle aged accountant, share minion memes on Facebook, and buy your son a puppy so you have an excuse to talk to the dog and not people. There you go. Done.

Jin Zixuan: No, rewind--Xuanyu, you stabbed our brother?

[brief silence]

Qin Su: [brightly] Well, that's going to do it for us today, folks--!

Jin Zixuan: A-Yu!

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: It was only a little!

Jin Zixuan: How can you stab someone a little ?!

[crosstalk] Qin Su: Thank you so much for listening in this week--

Jin Zixuan: With what ? Why?!

Mo Xuanyu: It honestly wasn’t that bad, he made it sound like--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: That's not an answer --

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [begins laughing]

Jin Zixuan: A-Yao--!

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [still laughing]

Qin Su: [brightly] We hope you enjoyed our enlightening romp, here! We want to thank Sister Sledge for the use of the song We Are Family. A-Yu, how about that last Yahoo?

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [farther from mic, clearly grinning] Ohhh, boy.

Mo Xuanyu: Okay, okay--anonymous Yahoo Answers user asks….[exaggerated, desperate voice] ‘I can’t afford a freezer. Where do I put my deer meat?’

[Outro music begins quietly]

Qin Su: [laughs] I’m Qin Su.

Jin Zixuan: [sighs, disgruntled] I’m Jin Zixuan.

Meng Yao: [grinning] I’m Meng Yao.

Mo Xuanyu: [sheepish] I’m Mo Xuanyu.

Qin Su: And this has been My Brothers, My Sister, And Me! Thank you to everyone, see you next week and remember; send your trash dad straight to jail!

#my stuff #my fic #mbmsam #au #modern au #jgy #jzx #mxy #qs #text #ALSO THANK YOU LITTLE-SMARTASS FOR THE IDEA FOR THE THEME SONG I added that on the AO3 version because I FORGOT

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volleychumps · 4 years ago

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omg omg omg ive been waiting for open requests!! okay so, is it okay if i ask for a stuck in the locker scenario with iwa, tsuki, kuroo, and akaashi?? thank you sooo much! ur blog is one of the only ones i check daily cuz the content is just 💓💓💓💓

Getting Stuck in the Locker Room w/ Iwaizumi, Tsukishima, Kuroo, and Akaashi (slight tsundere! reader)

ahah for the sake of it let’s make them enemies who come out as friends (maybe more?)

---------------------------------

Iwaizumi

“Oi. Lemme have a go at it.”

“Oh, my apologies! Allow me to make way for the manly man to come and magically unlock the door with his brute strength.” You quip sarcastically, Iwaizumi rolling his eyes as he takes your place in front of the door to tug at the handle, frowning when it doesn’t budge. He tilts his head, towel around his neck tilting with it.

“It won’t open.”

“Thank you, no really- you’re too helpful.”

You sigh, doing what you originally came here for as you slip Kindaichi’s knee pads into his locker, your cousin accidentally leaving them in his classroom before pleading with you to bring them. Your original plan of getting in and out had obviously been severely tarnished, leaving you with the one guy you-

“Ah. So that’s why you’re in here.”

You flinch at the sound of Iwaizumi’s deep voice sounding behind you, much closer than you expected before you turn, not being able to mask the scarlet that tinges your cheeks at Iwa’s exposed broad chest.

“Would it kill you to wear a shirt, perv?”

“Says the girl in the boy’s locker room.” Iwa takes another step towards you casually, a hand slipping into the sweats he had just changed to as you swallow tightly, looking away as your back touches the lockers. Iwaizumi’s face remains stoic, save for the slight arch of his eyebrow that signals his amusement.

“Who’s the real perv here?”

“Just put on a shirt and stop teasing me...please.” You mumble, embarassed as a small smirk overtakes Iwa’s lips as he opens up the door two lockers down from Kindaichi’s, pulling a white short-sleeve over his head that highlighted his arms quite nicely-

You shake your head of such thoughts before running a hand through your hair, sitting down on one of the nearby benches as an awkward silence fills the room.

“Can’t you call Oikawa or someone to come un-jam the door?”

“Nope. That shithead’s in practice with the rest of ‘em, and I left my bag in the gym.” Iwa replies shortly, taking a seat on the opposite end of the bench before opening his water bottle. “I was supposed to be excused today, but I ended up stuck here with my favorite person.”

“My luck is immense right now.” You retort with a sarcastic chuckle, eyes widening when Iwa scoots down the bench so his muscular thigh is just touching yours.

“Well, on the bright side: I have you cornered to ask why you don’t like me and avoid me like I’m some kind of sickness.” Iwa shrugs, offering you his water bottle before lowering it at your deadpan stare. You hesitate before sighing, allowing him an inch of the truth.

“I don’t not like you. You’re just mean- do you know how many times Kindaichi comes to me with tears in his eyes?”

“Hm.”

You huff, wanting to go hit on the door to catch someone’s attention before Iwa moves to crouch in front of you, causing your breath to hitch at the proximity and a involuntary heart beat to sound in your ears.

“I can be a lot meaner.”

“Stop joking around.”

“Am I joking?” You bite your lip when Iwa’s face nears even closer, his head tilting as you panic, grabbing the towel he had been drying his hair with and throwing it over his head. He frowns, wondering if he had actually made you uncomfortable with his little prank, before deciding to back off-

Iwaizumi scoffs, lifting the white material only for onyx eyes to widen at the sight of your flushed cheeks and furrowed brows, expression one of-

“Y/N-! oh. Oh crap-am I interrupting?”

The sound of Kindaichi’s voice had you pushing off the bench to race past your cousin and out the door, Iwaizumi still blinking at the spot where you had sat before he rises to his feet, lips twitching into a hint of an amused half-grin.

He ignores Kindaichi’s inquiries of what happened as he throws the towel over his shoulder, the sight of your flushed cheeks filling his mind as he huffs through his nose in disbelief at what he had discovered.

“Oi Kindaichi.”

“Y-Yes, senpai?”

“Give me your cousin’s number, will ya?”

Kuroo

“This is not happening-”

“Y/N-”

“Out of all people! It had to be you-”

“First of all, rude-”

“God, why couldn’t it have been Kenma? I’m going to kill Lev for making me come in here to get his shitty shoes-”

“Kitten-”

“Don’t kitten me!” You stop pulling on the door to turn on an amused Kuroo, who whistles lowly as he adjusts the towel around his waist. He runs a hand through his slightly damp hair as he opens one of the locker doors, turning his head to offer you a lazy grin as he does so, arm resting on top of the door.

“Relax. We’re not stuck in here, someone’s bound to come eventually.” He takes out a shirt and his school pants, glancing at you with a glint in his feral eyes. “And I’m gonna get dressed, so stop acting like the world is ending, sweetheart. You can watch if you-”

“Pass.” You turn to face the wall with heat in your cheeks, Kuroo’s chuckle annoying in your ears as you resist the urge to groan. You touch the wall with your forehead as a steady beat sounds in your chest, wondering why it had to be him.

“That wall isn’t the cleanest, babe.”

You flinch at the whisper that tickles your ear, Kuroo stepping back on instinct when you turn on him with that same smug look that you-

“Why do you hate me again? Just because Lev tells you I’m a little mean-”

“An absolute monster.” You correct, glaring at him as you put an arm out to distance yourself.

Kuroo’s grin only widens, hand reaching out to rest on the wall-space next to your head as he leans a little closer.

“Oh? And why does this pretty kitty believe him?”

“I...” You stand your ground, not breaking eye-contact as you pray he can’t see the heat tickling your cheeks and ears as your arm wavers. “I don’t. Stop flirting with me like all the others-”

“You think I pay attention to the other girls?” Kuroo’s eyebrows rise in amusement at your words as you blink in surprise, lips beginning to tremble.

“T-Then you’re trying to tell me I’m the only girl you pay attention to?”

“Would it be that big of a surprise?” Kuroo leans a little closer until his lips are by your ear, causing you to involuntarily shudder as your body betrays you. “It’s hard not to, you know?”

“Shut up.” You find strength in your legs and voice again as you shove him lightly, Kuroo merely catching one of your wrists as he grins at the fact that you seemed to be responding to his advances well. The blush on your cheeks only making him continue as his hazel eyes brim with seriousness.

“Kitten, do I have to spell it out for you?” Kuroo’s grip on your wrist tightens ever so slightly as the clean scent of him fills your nose, hazel eyes glinting as he takes in your now embarrassed expression from mere inches away.

“You’re always the prettiest one in the room.”

Your arm falls to your side completely as Kuroo takes the opportunity to rest a hand on your waist, his other hand going to cup your jaw as his breath ghosts over your lips-

“Y/N I CAME TO RESCUE YOU-!”

Lev stumbles through the jammed door dramatically, and you shove Kuroo away as you glare at the captain heatedly, gritting your teeth at the fact that you almost fell for it.

“Please don’t mess with my head, Tetsurou.”

Kuroo’s calls for you to come back fall on deaf ears as Lev looks between his captain and your retreating figure in wonderment, wondering what the hell was going on before a sinister-sounding chuckle fills the damp locker room.

“S-stop bullying my little cousin-!”

“Lev.” Kuroo turns his head as a shiver runs down his junior’s spine, Kuroo running a hand through his hair in an agitated manner as all teasing tendencies from before washed away. “Go. Make sure she gets home okay.”

The captain sighs as his own forehead touches the wall where yours had, a soft disbelieving scoff slipping his lips as the sound of Lev’s steps fade down the hall.

“I wasn’t messing with your pretty little head, Y/N.”

Tsukishima

“I feel like you did this on purpose.”

“Don’t flatter yourself.” You bite back as Tsukishima scoffs from behind you, and you turn slightly to cast a slight glare to the laid back blonde as Tsukishima scratches the back of his neck boredly. “Would it kill you to help me?”

“It’s locked. What can we do? You’re wasting strength.”

“Right, we have to use my upper body strength because I forgot you don’t have any.” You smile sweetly before breaking into a yawn, Tsukishima narrowing his eyes at you before pushing you slightly to the side.

“Move. I’ll be the one to open this damn door.”

“For someone who seems really calm you get riled up really easily.” You grin through slightly teary eyes from your yawn as Tsukishima makes the smallest effort at tugging the handle before turning to you.

“We’re stuck.”

“Oh are we?”

Tsukishima rolls his eyes as you take a comfortable seat against the lockers, sitting on the floor before groaning. “I can’t believe neither of us have our phones.”

“You’re a teenage girl, why are you without it?”

“Very good observation, Tsukki!”

“Don’t call me-”

“Anyways, Tsukki.” You cut him off, mock-cheeriness filling your voice as you bring your knees to your chest. “I came here to drop off Kageyama’s books for his homework tonight, so I left my phone in my classroom.”

“Funny way of saying you wanted to see me shower. That floor’s disgusting, by the way.”

“Bite me.” You yawn again, causing the blonde to lean against the jammed door while glancing at you, rubbing his fogged eyeglasses with the bottom of his practice shirt.

“Why do you look like you’re about to pass out?”

“Stop pretending to act like you’re interested.” You mumble, leaning your head on your crossed arms that rested on your knees. “But if you must know, I had exams today and ran soley on caffeine to get through them. I think the crash is hitting me.”

“Don’t die on our locker room floor, that’d be a pain to clean up.”

“Awe, your concern for me is the sweetest.” You quip, fighting the urge to close your eyes. “Just wake me when someone comes, will you?”

Tsukishima says nothing as he sees you beginning to nod off, cursing when you almost fall too far forward, his legs jutting out to cover your forehead and keep you steady when you’re fast asleep.

“Troublesome woman.” The blonde’s eyes narrow as he takes a seat next to you, carefully setting your head down on his shoulder as he rolls his eyes at the obvious heartbeat in his ears.

“Why did it have be you, anyways?” He whispers, brushing some hair out of your face before leaning his head back against the locker. Had it been anybody else, he would have been on the other side of the locker room, maybe even waiting it out in the showers-

so why did it have to be you?

“Tsukki.” You shift in your sleep, still halfway out of it as he merely hums in response, still acting disinterested until you cuddle your cheek into his shoulder, causing the blonde to tense up at the contact.

“You’re not a total bastard.”

Tsukishima can’t help the small smirk that overtakes his lips as he finds himself forgetting that every day seemed to be a challenge of who would confess first, praying that your even breaths signalled you were asleep again as he allows a ghost of a smile to grace his lips.

His hand slips into his sweats pocket as he wonders if he should feel guilty, taking his phone out as the screen lights up.

“And I suppose you’re not the worst choice of girl to like.”

Akaashi

“You’ve been at it for fifteen minutes.”

“Okay first of all- you’re creepy for keeping track.” You respond to the setter as Akaashi continues to absent-mindedly dry his hair with a towel, watching evenly as you finally give up before leaning your back against the jammed door.

“I’m sorry you’re stuck in here with someone you don’t like.” Akaashi mentions as he sets the damp towel down, frowning as he keeps a safe distance away from you. You bite your lip, guilt flooding your system as you mentally curse at how things turned out: Akaashi Keiji assuming you hated him and you having to go along with it to save face.

“I-It’s not just that.” You mumble, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I don’t do well in confined spaces.”

“Is...is there anything I can do?”

“As if you could help.” You laugh a little sarcastically, chest panging when Akaashi backs down quietly, and you mentally wish that you hadn’t taken Konoha’s request of coming into the boy’s locker room to grab his forgotten gym bag.

“I don’t hate you.” The words rush out before you can stop them, and you curse that you weren’t able to handle Akaashi’s dejected expression.

But you feared if he knew the real reason-

“Then...why do you always leave the room when I enter it?” Akaashi stands, and you gulp when he begins to approach you. “I respect your space, but how come you told Bokuto that you can’t stand being around me?”

“Why do you care?” You manage to laugh. “I’m a nobody to you, Akaashi.”

Before the setter could respond, you begin to have trouble controlling your breathing, Akaashi just managing to catch you before you could collapse as blue-green eyes widen when you stumble to regain your balance.

“I-I’m fine-!”

“You’re not.” Akaashi scolds, carefully setting you down on the floor gently as you take deep breaths in through the nose and exhaling through the mouth. “What can I do-?”

“Stop! Just quit being so damn nice all the time!” The words burst out before you can realize them, putting some distance between the two of you as the confinement of the locker room makes you laugh a little hysterically.

“You make me have all these damn feelings for you when you’re just nice to everyone. That’s just who you are.” Your eyes brim with unshed tears. “That’s why I can’t be your friend, Akaashi! Not when I’m in-”

“Sh.” Akaashi tugs on your wrist as your eyes widen when he pulls you into his chest. The dark-haired boy digs his face into your neck, holding you tightly as the confinement of the room suddenly begins to fade away, the tightness in your chest relieving to allow a new emotion to take place.

“You were never a nobody to me, Y/N. When you stopped being my friend I wondered for days why you would just suddenly hate me...”

His hold tightened as a few tears slip your widened eyes, his voice falling to a hush in your neck.

“I’m sorry I never noticed. I’m sorry, so just be with me from now on, okay?”

“I-I already told you-”

“Not as my friend.” Akaashi cuts you off, thumb wiping at your eyes kindly as he pulls back gently to brush your nose with his. “Be with me as someone more than that.”

Akaashi smiles softly as your breathing evens out, tugging you into his chest even more as you smile as a new kind of tear runs down your cheek.

“I missed you, Keiji.”

Unbeknowst to the two of you, Konoha and Bokuto touch knuckles from just outside the door, Konoha trying to be silent as possible as he twists the key to unlock the lock.

“I told you we should meddle!”

“Akaashi would absolutely kill us if he found out, Bokuto-”

The two stiffen as said setter flings the door open with your giggling form behind his back, darkness cascading the setter’s face as Bokuto chukcles nervously, Konoha whistling as he looks off to the side while throwing the key a good distance away.

“Funny seeing you here, Akaashi!”

“Whaaaat Y/N, what are you doing in there-”

“I hate both of you.”

------------------------------------

General works: @takemetovalhalla @kasandrafaye @dreebbles @savemesteeb @yams046

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