#can’t be both because then that’s not a separate continent

[freepsychicbiscuitfire]

The stupidest hill I will die on is that it isn’t ignorant of Americans to say they went to Europe instead of the actual country because Europe is not a continent just a country with an overinflated sense of ego.

[nyankochan]

Kissing You💋

Content: Fairy Tail Men x gn!reader and how they like to kiss you, fluff, mentions of sex in Sting’s part

A/n: this was in my drafts lol

Lazy Kisses

Some of your favorite kisses from Rogue are those first thing in the morning ones that he gives while he’s still somewhat drowsy. He’s so pliant and gentle when he kisses you in general, but first thing in the morning he’s like a big teddy bear.

Usually, if he wakes before you due to the rising sun peeking through the curtains, Rogue will usually stir, and feel around the bed to make sure you’re close. You usually are already pressed against his chest, but if you happen to have moved during the night, you’ll either roll back over or Rogue pulls you to him. He’s especially clinging in the morning.

He’ll press fluttering kisses against your jaw and cheek on the search for your lips. You’ll nuzzle up against his neck, your legs intertwining with his and the messy sheets. Rogue drapes his arm around your waist and inhales your scent continently. If you guys don’t have a job to take, you’ll fall back asleep for a while before getting up to start the day

“5 more minutes. I wanna hold you longer.”

Passionate Kisses

Sting is very passionate when he kisses you. He can be quite impatient at times, but overall is very gentle. Especially after you two have sex. You both will be hot and sweaty, tangled in each others arms and he’ll kiss your lips long and slow, savoring your taste.

He loves your body and finds any part of you attractive. He’ll kiss your neck. Your shoulder. Your chest. Don’t be surprised if he leaves little bite marks along the way. Sting does it honestly to just memorize the way you feel in his arms.

If you’re not going another round, he’ll just slowly make out with you, his touch intense yet sweet as he mumbles how much he loves you against your lips.

“You’re so sweet. I want to taste you more.”

Heated Kisses

Kissing Natsu is always exciting. He’ll find any reason to kiss you. In fact, he really doesn’t need a reason. He just likes PDA, and will kiss you out the blue even if it’s embarrassing. Natsu though, can get really heated and passionate with his kisses, especially if he hasn’t seen you in a while.

If you or him are separated for a while due to work, expect him to be all over you when you reunite. He grabs on to your chin, pulling you close as he groans into your mouth when your lips meet. Your hands find the front of his clothes, having to hold on to them tightly because Natsu will quite literally leave you breathless.

Natsu’s the type to never want to let you go. He always kisses you as if it’s his last time, so they’re always filled with such love and emotion. Sometimes, you have to remind him that you need to breathe.

“Have I told you how much I love you?”

Breathless Kisses

Gajeel definitely likes to tease you. He’ll pull away just out of reach so that you can’t reach his lips to kiss him if you’re shorter than him or turn his face at the last second to mess with you. He likes to catch you by surprise, kissing you when you least expect it.

When he does kiss you, he’s fast, rough but still sweet. His kisses don’t tend to last long. Instead, he pecks your lips multiple times, leaving you breathless and flustered. In between kisses he grins, and you realize he’s messing with you again which makes you laugh.

He can be passionate when he wants to, pulling you in by your waist and capturing your lips gently. Either way, he always manages to leave you breathless and gasping for more.

“You really take my breath away. You know that?”

Comforting Kisses

Gray has been through a lot and often leans on you for support when he has his tough days. You can usually tell when he gets in his head as he’s more moody. Even if words aren’t exchanged your comforting touch and gentle kiss against his lips soothe the aching feeling of guilt in his heart.

The same goes for you when you’re having a bad day for whatever reason. If you’re crying, he kisses away your tears, all while whispering soft reassurances in your ear. He’ll take your hands into his, caressing your knuckles with his thumb before too giving them a gentle kiss.

The sweet and sensual feeling of kissing Gray is always endearing. You very much complete him and he does not hesitate to let you know how much he values you. Through the good and the bad, his love is always comforting.

“Everything is going to be all right. I’m here.”

[lsd-astronaut]

Hello!! I hope you don’t mind me asking but could you do a fluffy Crowley x Demon!reader x Aziraphale fic (or headcanons)??

Maybe something like what it’s like all being in a relationship together?

(Also if it’s not too much to ask can the reader use a cane to walk around? Maybe because of something relating to when they fell and became a demon? If not that’s okay!!!)

First of all, I love you and I could kiss you in the mouth right now. I’VE BEEN SAYING FOR AGES THAT CROWLEY WOULD HAVE CHRONIC PAIN BC OF THE FUCKING FALL. I refuse to believe for one moment that you can fall all the way from Heaven, land on the ground and be all “hey guys i’m fine!”

Aziraphale x Demon!Reader x Crowley

Please like and reblog<3

Warnings: chronic pain, but nothing else, this is just good old fluff

• You were an archangel along with Crowley, with the same obligations in making the cosmos✨ so you both met Aziraphale at the same time

• When Azi told you both that the project was destined to close in a few thousand years, you were the one that proposed to fill a complain to God (and crowley seconded you)

• Cue a war and a Fall later, Crowley and you are in Hell, but in different departments so you don’t see each other much

• In fact, you didn’t see Azi and Crowley for the first time since the Fall until the crucifixion of Jesus

• You stood beside them in silent reverence to this poor soul lost for all of humanity

• “What sort of mother would wish this fate upon her own kin?” Crowley and Azi turned to you with confused expressions (although Crowley gained a lot of respect for that comment hehe)

• After some idle conversation, and Crowley convincing Aziraphale not to just smite you right there and then, you three decide to traverse the world

• Centuries pass, and Crowley and you stay around humans (you love their way of living, and he likes children so everyone wins)

• You like to read everything you can get your hands on, to Crowley’s chagrin

• “Now I have two bookworms. What have I done to deserve this?”

• It’s circa the year 1000, in the new continent that these curious people called Vikings have discovered, when Crowley and you decide to experiment a human thing that you had wanted to try for a long time

• Your first kiss is messy, and there are more teeth than anything else; besides Crowley insists it feels slimey

• However, she can’t help but to accept he got a bit aroused by it

• Practice makes better, as they say, and so you do

• Although you spend the most time with Crowley, your relationship with Aziraphale also evolves throughout the years

• The “we have a mutual but I still don’t like you” to “maybe I do care about you” pipeline, if you want

• You take him to all kind of food places and bookstores, and he warms up to you a lot

• Introducing him to classical music was your proudest moment, and also the pettiest as Crowley had crossed you a bit beforehand

• The first time you kiss Aziraphale (or rather, he does), is one time you both were a bit tipsy during a masquerade ball in Paris in the 18th century

• He is a bit unexperienced but he gets the hang out of it really quick

• The three of you “confess” to each other in 1941, after the magic show fiasco

• Crowley looks nonchalant but you can see behind his eyes, he was worried sick he would be separated from both of you

• You make sure to give him extra cuddles that night

• Fast forward to 2008 and you work in Warlock’s house along with Nanny Ashtoreth and Brother Francis, you being Warlock’s governess (like this is the fucking 1800s or smth lmao)

• It is at this time that the two of them notice you limping a bit every day after all chores have been done

• You insist that it is nothing and that you are perfectly capable of walking

• However, Ashtoreth happens to see you during one of your bad flares

• She immediately helps you to sit down on the bed, and looks at you expecting an explanation

• Her no-nonsense glare deters you from making up an excuse so you tell her the whole truth

• When you had fallen, you hadn’t landed correctly and had broken your legs on impact

• Miracles hadn’t done the full job and so you had been forced to endure the pain of the bones repairing themselves not quite right

• You had learned to mask the pain after centuries of practice but some days were just worse than others

• The next day, Ashtoreth gifts you a cane adorned with a snake head with little wings

• You proudly use it every day forward

• After the Second Coming, the three of you go to live in South Downs, finally able to be yourselves together

• There is still so much stuff to learn about everything, but you’re immortal and you are not alone, so why the hurry?

• As the sun sets on the horizon, you lean your head on Aziraphale’s shoulder as he reads one of Jane Austen’s books, and Crowley’s head is on your lap, already snoring softly

• You will be okay

I just wanted to say, I’m sorry if this is not what you asked for exactly as it is my first time writing for these two and I haven’t written either in two years so I feel I’m very rusty. I forgot ab the chronic pain until almost at the end, and I talk more about the history of you relationship than the actual relationship in itself lmao

Still, I hope you like it!

[callsign-rogueone]

resson (garrick's version)

Garrick Tavis x reader a Garrick and Angel chapter! I need to re-number these at some point, but this happens between 1 and 2 — some of the events at Resson, and them going back to Aretia. written in Garrick’s pov, since Angel isn’t exactly conscious at the moment... words: 2.9k 🏷️: fourth wing spoilers, major character death, canon injury, allusions to hypothermia, writing as Garrick is hard but I tried, poor boy isn’t sure she’s gonna survive this (we know she does, since I wrote this out of order, but still), he takes good care of his girl, Sweetheart makes an appearance along with Darling Spark and Love, somewhat proofread but not really. I’m sorry this took me so long, but here it is. better late than never?

There’s a red dragon lying on the ground, wounded. It’s either Cosa or Deigh, but I can’t tell from this far out. Deigh, I realize when I’m close enough to see his horns, and he isn’t moving. If he’s dead, then Liam only has a few minutes left.

I make the jump too quickly, scrambling to get my feet underneath me, but I’m too late. Liam’s gone. His girlfriend is sobbing into his shoulder, Bodhi attempting to soothe her through his own tears. He has one arm held to his chest, the other rubbing her back gently. 

But there’s a second body slumped against Deigh’s side, and my heart nearly stops when I realize who it is. 

“Angel,” I breathe, kneeling down beside her, brushing my hands over her cheeks. She’s cold to the touch even in the July heat, her head lolled down onto her chest and her body completely limp, but she’s still breathing, thank the gods. I couldn’t bear to lose both her and Liam on the same day. It would destroy me. 

A quick inspection and confirmation from Tab tell me that she’s not wounded — a few scratches here and there, and some tender points that will be bruised tomorrow, but nothing major.

“She tried,” Bodhi tells me quietly. “There was nothing she could do, but she tried anyway, and…” He doesn’t finish the sentence, knowing that I can see it as well as he can.

I’ve seen her drained before, completely exhausted after a long day mending in the infirmary, unsteady on her feet and ready to flop facedown onto my bed and sleep it off, but this is several steps past that. It’s clear that she’d used absolutely everything she had in trying to keep Liam and Deigh alive, and I don’t know how long it will take her to recover. 

If she does recover, I think for a single second before crumpling the thought up like a piece of parchment and shoving it deep, deep down. She’s going to live. She’s going to recover. She has to. There is no way that the two of us could ever be separated like that. 

I have to do something, but what? Is sleeping it off followed by a giant bowl of pasta going to be enough this time, or does she need to see a healer? Could the healers even fix this? Is there a cure for burnout other than rest?

“The Lieutenant Colonel would know. He’s a mender as well.” 

Brennan would know. Him or Colonel Colbersy would be the best bets — but the idea of taking her back to that hellhole school right now is enough to light my blood on fire. Graduation is in less than a week, and I know they aren’t going to give her any time to recover before they transfer her across the continent to gods-know-where and expect her to start working.

I hook an arm under her knees, another behind her back, lifting her up from the dirt and gathering her into my lap. She’s too drained to speak, to open her eyes, but I feel a little flare of recognition from her as she leans into my chest — she knows it’s me. She’s still in there. 

I tuck her head into my shoulder, stroking a hand over her disheveled braids, because that’s all I can do right now.

Our little sister has silently slotted herself between me and Bodhi. She leans her head against my shoulder, sniffling quietly. She looks unharmed, but there’s dried blood coating her nose and upper lip, and her cuticles are shredded; she’s been peeling them since we left the school, as a nervous habit. Something’s bothering her, but I haven’t had time to ask what — though I have a suspicion that it has something to do with that little joker in Violet’s squad.

And now this. Liam had become her best friend, the first person her age that she was truly comfortable with, and now… I put my other arm around her, squeezing gently. She’s trembling, crying as quietly as possible — even in a situation like this, she doesn’t want to make a sound.

“I’m so sorry, kid,” I say softly, as if that will make it hurt any less.

She leans into me a little further. “Is she going to be okay?”

“Yeah,” I promise her, “She’s gonna be fine in a day or two. She just needs rest — you know how it is.”

I pray to every higher power that exists that I’m right — that Angel will be fine, that our sister won’t lose yet another loved one. She’s finally coming out of her shell, starting to let people in, but I’m afraid that losing Liam might send her right back to square one: the girl I’d met six years ago, who was too scared to speak. I didn’t hear her voice for a week and a half — only timid nods or shakes of the head for yes or no questions.

My eyes widen as I see Xaden approach, a limp-looking Violet in his arms. She’s wheezing, black blood trickling from a wound in her side.

“It has to be poison,” Imogen reasons, sounding more torn up about this than I thought she’d ever be. “Look at it! We have to get her back to Basgiath. Nolon might be able to help.”

“That’s a twelve-hour flight.” Xaden’s voice rises. “And I’m pretty sure her arm is broken.”

Is she going to make it that long?

“There’s somewhere closer,” he says quietly.

“You can’t be serious,” Ciaran interrupts.

“You’ll put everything at risk,” I warn.

Tairn roars in dissent.

“I wouldn’t say that again,” Imogen mutters, “or he’ll probably eat you. And don’t forget, if she dies, there’s a damn good chance Xaden does, too.”

“I’m not saying he shouldn’t, just reminding him what the stakes are.”

“I don’t give a fuck what happens to me!” Xaden yells. “We’re going, and that’s an order.”

Bodhi agrees without protest. “No need for orders, man. We’ll save her.” 

“You’re sure about this?” Imogen asks.

“Stop fucking asking him that,” I snap without thinking. “He made his decision. Support him or get the fuck out, Imogen.”

“And it’s a bad one.”

Bodhi turns his head to glare at him. “When you have a hundred and seven scars on your back, then you get to make the fucking decisions, Ciaran.”

Rocks crunch under a pair of boots as another of our friends approaches. She looks utterly defeated — her face, neck, and hair are splattered with wyvern blood, and the makeup she’d so carefully applied for the Reunification Day party is running in dark trails down her cheeks, her eyes swollen and red from crying. She’s unusually quiet as she speaks. “X is right. We need to lie low for a few days — get our wounded help, and…”

And bury Liam. Her little brother. 

A wave of guilt floods through me. I had been too focused on Angel to fully process the fact that Liam, Xaden’s little brother, who may as well be mine too, is gone forever. We have to bury him tomorrow. I’ll never hear him laugh again, never receive another one of his little wood carvings… Oh, fuck. Sloane. She’d been counting down until her conscription day, when she could see him again, but now she never will. 

“It’s settled, then,” another soft voice says — Bodhi’s wife. “We’re going home.”

Nobody dares to disagree with her.

I give our sister one last gentle squeeze before I rise from the ground, Angel in my arms, and carry her the hundred yards to the rest of the riot, who have been keeping watch over us.

Tab lowers his head, mournful and dejected. He must regret not cutting her off, blocking her out from his magic before she overdid it. She’d never forgive him if he had interfered with her efforts to save Liam, but if he had, she might still be lucid. 

It’s absolutely terrifying seeing her like this. 

Chradh nods in understanding before I can ask, lowering himself flat to the ground so I can climb up while still holding her. I know it’s a major no-no for a dragon to bear anyone but their rider, but all of ours understand the gravity of the situation — a few of us aren’t in condition to fly, and will need to double up with someone who is.

She’s still freezing cold, and I know that the altitude and wind on our flight home won’t help. I sit her up in front of me, removing my flight jacket one sleeve at a time. 

It’s like dressing a doll — she’s completely pliant in my arms, and I have to keep moving her to get the jacket on, guiding her hands through the sleeves and buttoning it closed on top of her own. I pull her goggles up so the wind won’t hurt her eyes, and turn her head to tuck her face into my neck. 

Chradh wraps an invisible band of power around us to help keep her in place. 

“Just hang on for me, Angel,” I murmur, my lips brushing her hairline. “We’re taking you home.”

———————————————

Every step up the staircase sends a wave of pain up my left leg. I fucked up my knee in my running landing, too panicked to think straight once I realized that one of the dragons was wounded so severely.

I can worry about myself later. Right now I need to get her in bed, and prepare her for Brennan’s assessment.

My magic works to open the doors here, too, so I don’t have to worry about dropping her while I get us inside. I sit in my desk chair and prop her up in my lap, the wood creaking under our combined weight. 

I get her out of my flight jacket, then hers, and assess the state of her base layers. I decide to get her out of her leathers, at least — those are terrible to sleep in, and she’s always been picky about “outside clothes” on the bed. 

She was cold to the touch even with the extra layers, but without them I realize exactly how icy her skin is. I leave her with shorts and a tank top, but I pull back the bed covers with one hand and lay her down, piling her with blankets to make up for the loss. As soon as I drape them over her body, I’m rewarded with a small sign of life — she burrows deeper into the covers, seeking warmth.

Maybe warming her back up will be enough to get her lucid again, like this is some kind of hypothermia. But how did that happen? It’s July, the warmest part of the year across the whole continent.

I drag my desk chair over to the edge of the bed, taking a seat. It’ll be a while yet before Brennan can check on her — it’s going to take a small miracle for him to get the poison out of Violet’s system. 

She’s turned her head away from me, so I occupy myself with fixing her braids. They’re undone in places, big strands pulled out by the wind. I untie the leather band at the bottom, setting it on the nightstand and gently undoing the plaits. 

I’ve been practicing, but I’m not skilled enough to do the style she usually wears. I settle for detangling as best I can with just my fingers, and gathering it all into a low ponytail. It’s a small comfort to see her looking less disheveled. This way I can almost pretend that there’s nothing wrong, that she’s just taking a nap in my bed on a winter afternoon, piled up with blankets. 

“Can you ask Tab to keep an eye on her while I shower?”

“He won’t be taking his eye off of her anytime soon.”

If Tab can still feel her, that’s a good sign, I guess. I’ll take anything normal as a good sign right now. I cast one last long glance at her before I slip into the bathroom, keeping the door open just in case.

I look like shit after nearly two full days of flight and combat, but a shower and some real sleep should help. The water here is warmer than at Basgiath — though that’s a very low bar — and the pressure isn’t terrible. It’s almost nice. It would be a welcome reprieve, if I wasn’t so worried about her and Violet and all of our friends. I’m pretty sure Bodhi broke an arm back there, and our sister looked so shaken… she’d disappeared as soon as we got home. I need to check on her in the morning.

I haven’t heard anything from the bedroom, which is either a good sign or a bad one, but when I peek my head out, I can see the pile of blankets still rising and falling with her slow breaths. I dry off as quickly as I can and begin the search for clean clothes.

My old pajama pants are loose enough to accommodate the extra inches I’ve put on my thighs in three years as a dragon rider, but I can’t fit my arms through the sleeves of the first shirt I find. I make a quick modification with one of my smaller knives before tugging it over my head and settling back down beside her.

There’s a soft knock on the door.

Brennan looks absolutely exhausted, but he waves a hand at me in dismissal as I rise from the creaking desk chair and offer it to him. Stubborn fucking Sorrengails. 

He examines her for a minute, his eyebrows drawn together the way I’ve seen them when he’s looking over a battle map as he checks her pulse. Her breaths become even slower as he wraps his hand around her wrist, her body relaxing. 

“How long has she been like this?”

“Since we left Resson,” I answer. “She didn’t wake up on the flight.”

He blows out a breath. “I can fix the smaller stuff, but I don’t know what made her this way. I’ve seen burnout before, but this isn’t it.” He pauses, and his voice is strained as he continues. “It’s like she siphoned half her life away to try to save him.”

I can’t help but wince, knowing how his friend had done just that in the battle of Aretia five years ago — only Naolin had given up not just half his life, but the whole of it. And him being reminded of that on the day that he’d finally reunited with his little sister, who is currently residing on Malek’s doormat… 

I break the silence after a moment. “She’s not a siphoner, though. She’s a mender, like you.”

“That explains it, I guess. The loss of Deigh’s power is what ended Liam’s life, but we can’t mend magic. There’s nothing she could have done, but she kept trying anyway, and it was too much for her.”

Again, he sounds pained. 

I tread carefully with my next question. “Have you seen it happen before? A rider lose their dragon?”

“Yes. I tried as hard as I could to save her, but it was futile. I felt utterly useless.”

“How long did it take you to recover?”

He shakes his head. “I didn’t need to. I was fine, just a little shaken.”

I exhale. “She’s always had issues with her signet. It’s easy for her to overwork herself, but I’ve never seen it this bad.”

He lets go of her wrist, setting her arm down gently, and I hear a soft sound of discomfort leave her lips. Why is she in pain? He’d just mended all of her visible injuries away, and I didn’t see anything under her clothes when I’d gotten her into bed. Maybe it’s the sudden cold — being mended always feels warm, and she’s still freezing.

“I’ll keep an eye on her,” I say softly. “Thank you.”

He nods, looking ready to head up a flight to his own room and collapse.

The sun has set, the warm dusk we’d landed in now replaced with dark night, and I’m absolutely exhausted. I lift up a few of the half dozen blankets, slotting myself in next to her. My entire body relaxes as soon as I’m horizontal on a real mattress, the pressure taken off of my legs. 

She curls into me with a soft sigh, and it takes an effort not to flinch at how cold she still is even through the layers of blankets, but I wrap my arms around her, trying to warm her up. “Angel?” I ask softly.

No response — not even a hum. How long is she going to be like this?

“I love you,” I say quietly, even though it’s doubtful she can hear me. “Get some rest, okay? You need to recover. You have to recover. I need you. We all need you.”

Another sleepy sigh as she shifts over a little, resting her head over my heart like she always does. It’s probably just muscle memory from sleeping like this every night for years, but part of me wonders if it’s her telling me that she loves me too, and that she’ll be okay.

“Sleep,” Chradh encourages. “We’ll watch her.”

I don’t respond, my eyes already closing. Shitty circumstances aside, it’s nice to be home again, curled up with her in my — our — own bed, away from the demands of that infernal school. 

We can sleep as late as we want tomorrow morning.

[paeliae-occasionally]

Hello! Intro Post.

Hi, so I’ve been hanging around for a while now, but I have recently started posting more so I have decided to write an intro.

Online I go by Pae, (or Pae pae) I am non-binary. (they/them) and I write and draw.

Current WIPs

Blue Posts are the essentials of you want to send me an ask , or if you just want an intro to the blog.

Pink are my personal favourites.

Scenes

Memory and death

Marsh Prison scene

Lore stuff:

Magic

Magic Systems

The history of the runes

More runes lore

Culture

The mages immortality lore

The death realms

The gardens

Languages

The Druids

The Mulai’Kaleppi

The Opyri

The Tiel’Drysar

(More Necromancy)

The lighthouse keepers

Laith’Zairel

Gods Culture

History

The blood wars

Blood wars 2

The mist war

The Separation, Dissolution and Accords

Maps

-Laith’Emeris 1

-Laith’Emeris 2

-30BD map

-Laith’Zairel

-How I make maps (continents)

Join the Tag List~

Summaries:

Paeliae - Magic politician

A mage living in the period when the god vs mages war starts. (8 BD, before dissolution) He is a politician, despite having no patience for the ages old elvish mages who currently run the council. He is obsessed with leaving a lasting legacy even if that means dying today. As such he is vehemently against the concept of immortality, During the war he helps negotiate with the gods to come to a truce. 27, He/Him.

Xaeren - Runic Inventor

Xaeren designed 42 of the 47 runes and uses them to protect himself from the vengeful goddess Schaeres. When she finally attacks him, Xaeren realises there were very few limits to what he could do with the runes and sets out to kill Schaeres, both as payback and just to prove that he can. But some things can’t be done alone…

Xaeren lore 1

Xaeren lore 2- (This is a bit old so some of the Kell stuff has changed)

Xaeren lore 3

Kell - Magic Student

Xaeren rescues her from a small dock town and gets her a place at the Lysandri school of magic. Kell is thrust into a world of magic and has to keep up with the help of Xaeren’s tutoring, but as she begins to fit in with the mages there, her loyalty to the criminal godkiller Xaeren comes into question.

Tyro - Traumatised Sorcerer

lives in the modern day (about 1500 PD, post-dissolution). They have recently escaped from the abusive cult that adopted them as a child, with their adoptive brother Apollo. They are a sorcerer, so have born magic, but also we’re taught to use runes by the cult. They never used them because of trauma but they could if they wanted to. They are currently running from the cult and trying not to be noticed by the government, who take in all sorcerer children so they can have a monopoly on magic. They have found a family in some other sorcerers living in an abandoned manor outside the city. 17, They/them

Apollo - adopted older brother of Tyro.

He took care of them and the others in the cult, despite being abused severely himself. Despite the trauma he is a very powerful runic. He is currently being attacked by, and looking for other cults like the one he was adopted into to help other children like him. 21, He/They

Ez and Rin (~1000 BD)- The gay bois, who definitely don’t start the apocalypse.

Ez (short for Ezemhaziel) is the god of refined magic. He falls in love with Rin when he is researching to create the runes. He is somewhat of a Prometheus figure, as he brings the first magic to mortals by teaching Rin.

Rin is a gardener working for one of the altic kings, who equally loves Ez for his magic and creativity. Ez and Rin end up working on the runes together. The other gods get mad that Ez gave magic to a mortal, and they let the mortals murder Rin. Ez is mad. This will spiral and cause the start of the godly war, which then ushers in the godly mages war, where 3/4 of all mages die and the gods are removed from the world.

Ezemhaziel lore

Daimion and Marsh - the regretful and the merry murderer

Daimion and marsh grew up together being trained for an elite military unit, which they both got into. While in the unit they are ordered to fire on civilians and they do it, but later Daimion regrets killing innocents and leaves the unit without notice. He goes on to find the daughter of one of the people he murdered that day and the woman who has been taking care of her. He protects them fiercely and tries to make up for what he did. Marsh however, fully commits to the ‘I kill people as a job, I might as well enjoy it’ and ends up being so recklessly violent that he is imprisoned in the highest security jail in the country, which he later breaks out of to commit a massacre, then returns to his cell like nothing happened. This occurs a couple of times until Daimion has to go get him. - Marsh intro - Marsh lore

Just a brief overview of some of the things I am currently working on. I plan to post more about the magic systems and historical events of the world. I also post maps.

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Thanks for visiting, feel free to stick around <3

[horizon-verizon]

A lot of people are gonna disagree with me, but Daenerys is arguably THE most important character in the story. Like previous anon stated, there is a reason her chapters and ONLY her chapters were published first and independently before AGOT. There’s a reason she was mentioned specifically when GRRM talked about what the Ice and Fire refer to (the Others vs Daenerys and her dragons). There’s a reason her house specifically gets the most backstory. There’s a reason that she’s the only character whose story happened completely separately from the primary plot on a whole other continent that warranted a POV from the very beginning of the series. There’s a reason the very first book ends with her performing an unprecedented magical feat that is the biggest status quo shift in centuries in the entire universe of ASOIAF. There’s a reason that the magical feat aligns with a chosen one prophecy and happens before the audience even learns that said prophecy exists.

People are extremely resistant to her being the main character, but she’s so exceptionally different and unique both textually and metatextually that saying otherwise comes off, to me at least, as people believing otherwise because they kind of just don’t want her to be. They’re jealous she outperforms, outsells, and overshadows all their favorite characters combined. They’re mad a 15-year old is all around better in every single way and will be the savior of the world. It burns them and they can’t take it.

Anon talks of this post.

I agree, and I have a funny thought. It wouldn't surprise me if a lot of people saw Dany "rabid" stans as being too "arrogant" like a Targaryen, like Daemon, and even Dany herself. Definitely sees us as "narrowminded", to be so "bold" as to say she's the "most important" and defining character of this entire series, but if we review the values GRRM is writing in for ASoIaF, Dany embodies that without it turning into a "Mary Sue", perfect-girl boss situation. We see her learn and self doubt.

[olympeline]

I can see why The Parent Trap became such a staple AU for FACE family FrUK. It’s just too good to resist 😍 Here’s my version:

Francis and Arthur meet when they start attending the same London university: Francis to study fashion, Arthur journalism. Over the next four years they have a classic “enemies to lovers” relationship. They’re a couple by the time they graduate, but an immature and stormy one. Lots of fights, lots of near break ups, lots of making up. They get married early and start living together early, which was probably a mistake as neither were ready for it. They move to Paris (part of the reason for early marriage was visa based) and live together in a tiny, shitty apartment. Lots of up and downs, but life is generally good. Their relationship slowly improves, they grow together and stop fighting so much

Then they have their first real difference of opinion beyond just a spat: Francis has always wanted kids and wants to have them young. Arthur was more unsure, preferring to wait until they were older and settled. Deep down he’s afraid of losing Francis, and so gives in sooner than he should. Francis notices, but lies to himself about the depth of Arthur’s discomfort because he wants children so badly. Again, the immaturity and lack of communication hobbles them. If this problem had come up later, say in their early thirties rather than twenties, they could have handled it and compromised. But it didn’t, so a kid is on the way

Either this is set a little in the future, or Arthur is still his wizard self, but by science or magic they have a pair of twins. Born by surrogate, but Alfred and Matthew are biologically theirs. Alfred resembles Arthur more, Matthew takes after Francis. It doesn’t matter; both dads adore each baby so much it hurts

Unfortunately, this doesn’t stop things getting tough straight away, not in the least because they were only expecting one baby. They planned for one, budgeted for one, then got double. They might have coped, but then Francis’s fledgling fashion business gets an irresistible offer from a company in Quebec. Arthur really doesn’t want to leave France, but grudgingly agrees. They move when the boys are barely toddlers and the stress gets even worse. Moving to a new continent with twin babies and stretched finances? Cracks are starting to appear in the marriage for real by this point

Still, Francis and Arthur cope and hold their relationship together. They’re having problems, but neither wants to split up. They still love each other dearly. Also they have kids now. Even if the love had died, they’d want to try and make it work for their sake. They struggle on for a while and keep their heads above water. Both are too stubborn and proud to get therapy because that would mean admitting how bad things were getting between them.

Then, bombshell: Arthur gets a huge opportunity…but it would mean moving to New York for a year. And after everything, this is the straw that breaks the camel’s back. Francis doesn’t want to leave Canada because it could have a bad effect on his growing business. Also the boys would be starting kindergarten soon and Francis doesn’t want to uproot them again. Arthur argues he already did the same for Francis, and they’d be back soon anyway. And a boost to Arthur’s career would help set them up for the future, so Alfred and Matthew would benefit in the long run. They can’t agree and things get heated as the deadline for Arthur to accept approaches. Both accuse the other of being selfish and unreasonable. It snowballs from there. Long simmering resentments boil over. They can’t communicate well enough to get through this. One of them leaves to stay with a friend, then just never comes back to live at their apartment. Soon they’re living separate lives and only communicating about the boys. It’s unbearable, unsustainable. Break up. Divorce. The court awards each of them one twin. Arthur takes Alfred and moves to NYC, Francis stays in Quebec with Matthew.

Years pass, the twins start to grow up. There’s so much hurt and bitterness that communication between Francis and Arthur completely breaks down before the boys are old enough to remember their other parent. By the time they start elementary school, it’s total scorched earth. Francis and Arthur just refuse to talk about each other. Alfred bombards Arthur with questions, but his dad is a stone wall. Gentler Matthew gives up more quickly, but that doesn’t mean he’s any less curious. Eventually even Alfred has to give in. The twins accept that their “other dad” will always be a mystery

Life settles. Francis’s fashion label blooms and he and Matthew live a charmed life as Quebec upper crust. Meanwhile, Arthur gets work at a prestigious newspaper and writes historical nonfiction novels in his spare time. Alfred goes to public school and is a loud, joyous, ball of endless energy. Matthew goes to private school and is sweet, academic and well behaved, but so shy.

Both dads watch their son grow with pride. They seem happy, and sometimes they are, but in their private moments, the pain is still there. Francis is better at hiding his emotions than Arthur, while Matthew notices more than Alfred. So each twin knows their father is wistful. Thet can guess it’s about their “other dad.” Alfred and Matthew try to cheer up their dads in their own ways, but the hurt remains

Francis and Arthur never have any other long term relationships. Francis has no trouble finding partners, but nothing sticks. Matthew is secretly glad, then feels bad about it. He wants his papa to be happy but the thought of a stepfather/mother scares him. Meanwhile, Arthur’s dating life is a disaster and after a few years he just gives up on finding new love. Alfred is fine with them being a family of two. He likes having his dad’s attention focused on him rather than some lame boyfriend

That all changes when, after a night of commiseration and far too much whiskey, Arthur ends up in bed with Antonio. Antonio is a fellow immigrant and friend of a work friend, who happens to be going through his own disastrous love life problems. They met through Romano, who works at Arthur’s newspaper as a caustic restaurant critic. Arthur reminds Antonio of Romano, Antonio reminds Arthur of Francis. They’re both lonely and needy. It should have been just a one night stand, but they cling to each other and start a relationship (wrong tsundere, Antonio!) Romantically it’s not good and everyone can see there’s no real spark. But Arthur and Antonio’s hearts are raw by this point and they dive into denial and start living together. Antonio is good with kids and Arthur thinks two parents will make for a better life for his handful of a son. Alfred likes Antonio, but he doesn’t think he should be his stepdad. Nevertheless, Arthur and Antonio get engaged but never set a date

Life settles, life goes on. Arthur starts sending Alfred to summer camp, which he loves. Francis gets a school report that Matthew is a lovely, polite boy, but he could do with trying to be a little more extroverted and making more friends. Francis decides to send him to a highly reviewed summer camp just across the border

At long last, Alfred and Matthew finally meet, and…! Instantly loathe each other. Total antipathy. Alfred sees Mattie as a boring, sissy, goody-two-shoes who just wants to spoil everyone’s fun. Matthew sees Alfred as a loud, obnoxious, dumb, jerk jock who doesn’t care what happens to anyone else so long as he gets to do what he wants. An intense rivalry begins. Neither boy realises how much their lives are about to change

(This is getting really long so stay tuned for part 2! (´ε｀ )♡)

[i-heart-hxh]

I read one of your asks the other day and it’s got me feeling so bad for Killua. The fandom tends to make his decision to leave Gon about the chimera ant arc events but the truth is he just realized the seriousness of Alluka’s situation and is aware of what Illumi might do. He thinks to himself at one point that if Illumi knew how Killua can bypass Nanika’s restrictions he’d put more needles in him. And he tells Nanika to go away initially because he’s still afraid of Illumi. So it naturally makes sense that he wouldn’t want Gon involved but the problem is he can’t tell Gon this is the reason he’s leaving because Gon would insist on getting involved if he knew Killua was in danger. He’s keeping his most precious person safe but can’t tell him his true reasoning. And just imagine if Gon tries to reunite with him but Killua is torn on linking up with him again out of fear of putting him in danger but he also wouldn’t want Gon to feel unwanted. Honestly screw Illumi for putting Killua in this situation. Realizing Killua left mainly to keep Gon safe (because he could conceivably still protect Alluka with Gon there but he can’t keep Gon safe with Alluka there) has me sympathizing with him so much. When Gon finds out the truth the least of Illumi’s worries will be a broken arm.

Hi anon! Yeah, I really feel for Killua. He ends up going from one difficult and painful situation to another, and the situation does necessitate him not being totally honest or forthright with Gon in order to keep him safe. I see Killua as essentially trying to balance a bunch of different factors in the only way he can to protect his loved ones, which requires him to make some painful sacrifices--like having to separate from Gon for now, until he can figure out a solution to the issue of Illumi's pursuit and Alluka and Nanika's safety. His bravery in doing what he feels needs to be done is not to be underestimated, especially with everything he goes through in CAA and beyond. We have to remember he's still only a young teenager, and one who has been through tremendous amounts of trauma on top of that.

I actually wonder if he made the decision to separate from Gon after Alluka wouldn't let him seal away Nanika... He didn't express anything about separating from Gon prior to when they did, and it's possible he was planning to stay with both Gon and Alluka until he realized that wasn't something he'd be able to do while keeping them safe, as Illumi will stop at nothing to access Nanika's power. There's no one else in the world who can help Alluka and Nanika, it falls only on Killua (plus he has the guilt of having left Alluka behind before), so he had a terrible choice to make. It is also possible he made the choice before then, however, as he did ask Alluka well before that if she would be okay if he was the only person who loves her. This was partly him reassuring her when she asked if things would be better if she wasn't there/if the family would be better off without her (...which is so, so sad), but it also may have been related to him grappling with the decision of what to do next.

I really hope at some point we'll get to see the resolution of all of this in canon. There's so much to be excited for in this whole plotline, with the dynamics between Gon and Killua of course, what can be done about Illumi, how the story will develop with Alluka and Nanika and Nanika's ties to the Dark Continent, Killua freeing himself from the grip of his family once and for all, etc.

But yeah, Killua has been through a lot, and the position he's currently in is heartbreaking and complicated.

[lucky-clover-gazette]

prince's gambit highlights & annotations

chapter 18

indented text is from the book. some quotes have commentary, some do not. some comments are serious, and some are definitely not. most of them will only make sense to people who have read the series. and, like, there are spoilers. so please read the books first if you're interested!

also: part of the reason i'm doing such a close reading is to study cs pacat's style, especially in terms of how she does romance and erotica. there are "craft notes" that might seem weird, like i'm being redundant or restating something rather than analyzing, but those are more things that i want to remember/take away from the writing!

i'm going to tag these longer posts with "sam reads capri" in case anyone wants to read them all at once.

this is a google doc i wrote with overall content warnings for the captive prince series. it's not perfect, but i do think it's important to include.

‘I ordered the section cleared,’ Damen said. Jord was intruding. At home in Akielos, he’d only have had to glance up from what he was doing and order, Leave us, and the intrusion would be gone. And he could go back to what he had been doing. To what, gloriously, he had been doing. He’d been kissing Laurent and that should not be interrupted. His eyes returned warmly, possessively to their object: Laurent looked like any young man who has been pressed against a battlement and kissed. The slight disturbance of the hair at Laurent’s nape was wonderful. His hand had lain there.

His attention swung back to the intruder. The threat that Jord posed to him was galvanising. What had happened was not going to be threatened by anything or anyone.

damen is about to laser jord to death with his eyes so he can keep kissing laurent

‘Here to warn me about the dangers of making command decisions in bed?’ Laurent said.

OUCH

‘While we compare notes on spreading for the enemy?’ said Laurent.

the fact that laurent knows he’s doing this too!!! he has convinced himself that he has control over this situation purely because it can’t last

Jord’s eyes had turned to Damen, full of bloody-mindedness. But, He is Damianos of Akielos, Jord didn’t say, though he looked strained to his limits with repulsion at what he had just seen, and the silence stretched out, thick and tangible with what lay underneath. Damen stepped forward. ‘Maybe—’

was he about to tell the truth?? like "maybe we should talk"

Damen passed a hand over his face. Everyone in the fort was coming to the section he had ordered cleared.

damen is more persistently frustrated by having his first kiss with laurent interrupted than he’d been like. getting flogged

‘Jord,’ said Laurent, ‘this is why he fucked you. This moment.’ ‘I know that,’ said Jord. ‘Orlant,’ said Laurent, ‘didn’t deserve to die alone on the sword of a self-serving aristocrat he thought was a friend.’

laurent lecturing a guy for compromising his values and integrity because he got laid, after kissing the dude who killed his brother… i mean laurent seems to think he���s still in control here, again with the cognitive dissonance thing, but still…

‘I should make you watch,’ said Laurent, ‘while he’s stripped down for every man in the troop to have him.’ Damen stepped forward. ‘You don’t mean this. You need him as a hostage.’ ‘I don’t need him continent,’ said Laurent. Laurent’s face was perfectly smooth, his blue eyes cool and untouchable. Damen felt himself recoil slightly from that callous look, the surprise of it. He realised that he had fallen out of step with Laurent at some crucial point. He wanted to send everyone away, so that he could find his way back.

damen surprised by laurent’s ability to immediately separate himself from his emotions and attractions to do stone-cold haterism… i feel like throughout the series damen is both frustrated by this and deeply attracted to it

He said, ‘If there’s to be justice for Aimeric, then let it be justice, reasonably decided, publicly applied, not the men taking matters into their own hands.’ ‘Then by all means,’ said Laurent, ‘let us have justice. Since you’re both so eager for it. Drag Aimeric away from his admirers. Bring him to me in the south tower. Let us have everything out in the open.’ ‘Yes, Your Highness.’

laurent is in a bad mood because of the interruption as well. broken out of the romantic haze, he probably wants to take out some of the anger he has with himself over kissing damen on another person who he can project his bullshit onto

‘What are you doing?’ he said. ‘When I said there should be justice for Aimeric, I meant later, not now, when you’re . . .’ He searched Laurent’s face. ‘When we . . .’ He hit a look like a wall, and the uncaring lift of golden brows. Laurent said, ‘If Jord wants to get down on his knees for Aimeric, he should know exactly who he’s crawling for.’

okay laurent now you’re projecting. everyone here is a mess.

The south tower was crowned by a platform and a parapet pierced through not with useful rectangular slits but with slim, pointed arches, because this was Vere and there must always be some flourish...

yes damen please take that extra second to talk shit about the architecture to avoid dealing with the stressful situation you’re in

He knew that expression. His sense of danger, highly attuned to Laurent’s moods, told him that Aimeric was better off downstairs with a half dozen men than he was up here with Laurent. Laurent’s lids were smooth over a cool gaze, his posture straight-backed, his fingers poised on the rim of the goblet. I kissed him, thought Damen, the idea unreal here in this small circular stone room. The warm, sweet kiss had been broken in a moment of promise: the first slight parting of lips, the hint that Laurent had been on the cusp of allowing the kiss to deepen, though his body had been singing with tension. When he closed his eyes, he felt how it might have happened: slowly, Laurent’s mouth opening, Laurent’s hands lifting hesitantly to touch his body. He would have been careful, so careful.

damen brain: oh shit laurent’s pissed off. he’s going to eviscerate that guy. but also he was so soft and sweet when we kissed and i want to get back to that because i’d treat him so well <3

‘The loving reunion,’ said Laurent.

laurent you’re so fucked up for this. deal with the fact that you just kissed your brother’s murderer and liked it, instead of antagonizing this dumbass and your friend. although is he antagonizing jord, really? he might be trying to absolve jord of his guilt, exposing aimeric for being completely unworthy of his sympathy. which, i mean, is what some part of laurent probably wants to do to damen right now—remind himself that damianos is not worthy of his own sympathy or love. these people are so messy they need a reality tv film crew

Jord made a violent move forward, and Damen felt his whole body come under strain as, instinctively, he pushed in to halt him.

i don’t know if this is a lamen hr complaint. i don’t think so. damen almost certainly disagrees with laurent for lashing out and hitting aimeric, but also, he enables it by stopping jord. but i feel like everything about this situation is acting against the employee handbook anyway so who the fuck cares

In the first burst of movement, Damen had flung Jord ungently back, then held him off in a restraining grip. Jord had gone still but the strain of muscle was still there, his breathing harsh. Laurent replaced the goblet, with exquisite precision, on the table.

it’s a little hot that laurent has himself a bodyguard who will enable his pretty (typo for petty but that works too) violence ngl

Damen heard Aimeric say, thickly, ‘You can hit me as much as you like.’ ‘Can I? I think we’re going to enjoy each other, you and I. Tell me what else I can do to you.’

so laurent didn’t know it was aimeric. since learning, do you think he’s figured out that the regent specifically has been using/abusing him? obviously he figures it out/finds out eventually, but i’m curious about this scene, esp with what he says a few paragraphs later.

also the contrast between verging-on-sweet kissy laurent and sadistic bitchy laurent is mwahhhh pacat does not like to make things simple or easy

‘Stop this,’ said Jord. ‘He’s just a boy. He’s just a boy, he’s not old enough for this, he’s scared. He thinks you’re going to wreck his family.’

aimeric is 19, laurent is 20...

Aimeric turned his bruised, bloody face to the words, in disbelief that Jord was defending him. Laurent turned to face Jord at the same time, his golden brows arching.

well there’s a parallel. laurent reacts with similar disbelief when damen demonstrates earnest devotion to him

Uneasiness swept over him as he looked from Laurent’s face to Aimeric’s, and realised suddenly and for the first time how close Laurent and Aimeric were in age. There was six months’ difference between them, at most.

that's what i'm saying!!

‘But it’s not his family he’s fighting for.’

regent has entered the chat

Like a lover, Laurent smiled and touched a stray curl, tucking it behind Aimeric’s ear. Aimeric flinched, violently, then repressed the flinch, though he wasn’t able to control his breathing. Tenderly, Laurent drew a fingertip through the blood that welled from Aimeric’s split lip. ‘Pretty face,’ said Laurent. Then his fingers dropped back to brush Aimeric’s jaw, tilting it up as though for a kiss. Aimeric made a choked sound in response to pain; the bruised flesh under Laurent’s fingers was white. ‘I bet you were a peach of a little boy. A pretty peach. How old were you when you fucked my uncle?’

do you think that’s what the regent does… yeah probably. everyone here needs so much therapy

‘Did he tell you you’d be together again, if you’d just do this one thing? Did he tell you how much he missed you?’ ‘Shut up,’ said Aimeric. ‘He was lying. He wouldn’t take you back. You’re too old.’ ‘You don’t know,’ said Aimeric. ‘Thick-voiced and rough-cheeked, you’d make him sick.’ ‘You don’t know anything—’

damen not Getting It is important to the plot but also come ON damen

‘Loves you? You paltry little upstart. I doubt he even preferred you. How long did you hold his attention? A few fucks while he was bored in the country?’ ‘You don’t know anything about us,’ said Aimeric. ‘I know he didn’t bring you to court. He left you in Fortaine. You never asked yourself why?’ ‘He didn’t want to leave me. He told me,’ said Aimeric. ‘I bet you were easy. A few compliments, a little attention, and you gave him all the naive pleasures of a country virgin in his bed. He would have found it diverting. At first. What else is there to do in Fortaine? But the novelty wore off.’ ‘No,’ said Aimeric. ‘You’re pretty enough, and you were obviously hot for it. But used goods are not appealing unless they are something worth using. And the cheap wine you drink in a backwater tavern is not the kind that you serve at your own table, given choice.’

so yeah laurent def means this. it’s not quite pure projection because it’s true, but also… is he not saying the same things to himself about finally giving in to his own attraction to damen, who is leaving him tomorrow to go be the prince again?

‘My uncle is discriminating. Not like Jord,’ said Laurent, ‘who’ll take a middle-aged man’s sloppy seconds and treat it like it’s worth something.’

that's true. sorry jord

‘You cold-blooded son of a bitch,’ Jord said to Laurent. His voice was shaky. Laurent rounded on him, deliberately. ‘And then of course,’ said Laurent, ‘there’s you.’

jord RUN

To Laurent, in the same voice, he said, ‘Calm down.’ Laurent said, ‘I wasn’t finished.’ ‘Finished what? Reducing every man in the room? Jord isn’t any kind of match for you in this mood, and you know it. Calm down.’

god i love them i love them i love them they make me insane. damen stepping in like laurent is a cat antagonizing a mouse, “i wasn’t finished” has the slightest edge of pathetic acquiescence to it, like the cat has stopped with the mouse but it’s glaring at the owner who stepped in, and damen being like “you’re too powerful sweetie you know it’s not an even match and i don’t like seeing you like this, it’s not good for you, calm down” they make me CRAZY!!!!

‘Are you going to try it with me? Or do you only take pleasure in attacking those who cannot defend themselves?’ Damen heard the hardness in his own voice.

book 1 callback! and rightfully so!

‘I don’t share your craven habit of hitting only those who cannot hit back, and take no pleasure in hurting those weaker than myself.’ Driven past reason, the words came out in his own language. Laurent, who could speak his language, stared back at him, and Damen met his eyes and did not regret his words, feeling nothing but loathing.

‘I remember the last time you were like this. You blundered so badly you gave your uncle the excuse he needed to have you stripped of your lands.’

he's riiiiiiight

Abruptly, Laurent turned away. He put the heels of his palms on the table, gripping its edge, standing with his head down, his arms stiffly braced, tension across his back. Damen watched his ribcage expand and deflate, several times. Laurent was still for a moment, then, sharply, he swept his forearm across the table, a sudden, single movement that sent gilt plates and their contents crashing to the floor. An orange rolled. Water from the pitcher dripped from the table’s edge onto the floor. He could hear the sound of Laurent’s unsteady breathing. Damen allowed the silence in the room to stretch out. He didn’t look at the wrecked table, with its spilled meats, its scattered plates and overturned, fat-bellied pitcher. He looked at the line of Laurent’s back. As he had known to send the others out, he knew not to speak. He didn’t know how much time passed. Not long enough for the tension in Laurent’s back to unwinch. Laurent spoke without turning around. His voice was unpleasantly precise. ‘What you are saying is that when I lose control, I make mistakes. My uncle knows that, of course. It would have been an amusing pleasure for him to send Aimeric to work against me, you’re right. You, with your barbaric attitudes, your brutish, domineering arrogance, are always right.’ Laurent’s hands on the table were white. ‘I remember that trip to Fortaine. He left the capital for two weeks, then sent word he was extending it to three. He said it was his business with Guion that needed more time.’ Damen took a step forward, called by the tone in Laurent’s voice. Laurent said, ‘If you want me to calm down, get out.’

the homosexual having a panic attack...

anyway laurent is also confronting the fact that he lost control with damen, leading him to make a mistake. and that the regent sent/gifted him damen hoping that would happen. hence the gtfo.

[calamari-minecraft-corner]

Brain not working properly right now but the thirst for more au lore never ceases so I shall try to be at least somewhat making sense in my questions :)

In dnd con, what's disc duo like? I think Tommy's only been mentioned once but in canon almost anyway you slice it, that's a major relationship for both of them. Is their any parallel for exile arc somehow? And does Tommy know about Wiblur's whole 'being undead' thing? Or like is that a thing that only Wilbur and Dream know about? Come to think of it, how exactly did Wilbur die in the first place, was it just from the explosions or was Phil involved like in canon?

Hope that makes some amount of idk right now, brain is pretty scrambled

YEEEES DISCDUO MY BELOVED

1. Discduo is actually very cathartic for me in this au. At first when Tommy meets the party and Dream, he doesn’t like it. He’s fully running on his emotions and disdain and the only reason he’s alive right now is because Wilbur told Tommy not to kill him. It’s very jagged and messy at first-/ from BOTH sides. And Cala and Spooky notice it and so does Fundy but Fundy understands why Tommy is acting like that. And Tommy I will admit is being an ass, even when he realizes that Dream got hurt in prison because in his head that’s a good punishment for the hell tommy endured, even though a part of him just has that feeling that it isn’t right.

Over time though Tommy does come around to Dream. It’s slow and MESSY. and both of the boys go to Cala to talk to her separately on how they’re in the right for feeling this way and all that- and Cala doesn’t side with either of them but gives them honest advice- and she lets them come up with their own conclusions and how they want to handle it.

Early dnd con au it’s very much like exile- and during the war Tommy did go through an Exile esque arc with Dream which led to one of the many things that ended up fucking him over in the long run. So Tommy is still really fucked up by that despite thinking he’s healed and Dream sees this as a sort of power and control he can get back and feel like HIM again.

But the rest of the party nip that in the bud so so fast when they realize what’s happening.

And after a lot of uneasy talks and some major major arguments from both sides they come to an uneasy alliance, which later on becomes like.. a reformed friendship. They don’t like to admit it but they enjoy each other’s company a lot and they’ve both gotten insight from one another. And later in the au Tommy is a huge role that helps the party and even joins them for a while as a party member (he had to at first but it was more unwilling)

But now it’s literally along the lines of this animatic I made!

Tommy doesn’t forgive Dream for what he did to him- and vice versa. That’ll always be the big point. But they’re moving on because that’s really the only thing they can do.

And they still go back into the past but they know they have to move forward. That’s the only thing they can do if it’s to help the continent again.

2. Tommy has NO idea that Wilbur died. He was there when it happened and from his perspective, he saw the old kingdom blow up with Wilbur in it— Dream coming out minutes later being smug and fuckin unhinged, and then Wilbur coming a moment later turning on Dream and being the one to take him down and issue the command to surround him. So Tommy sees Wilbur as a hero and is loyal to a fault to him-/ even if he makes questionable choices. Nobody knows that Wilbur is undead but him and Dream, Techno and Philza, and that’s a hell of a reveal in in the AU :3

3. I mentioned it before but it was vague! But the way Wilbur died was that Wilbur in a moment of him kind of going mad blew up the kingdom at the height of the war, having a “if I can’t have this country no one can moment”, but thankfully the explosion didn’t obliterate the entire country just the capital and it did cause some casualties. But Wilbur was still alive in the explosion.

During the chaos, Phil found Wilbur since he knew what Wilbur was doing and was trying to talk his son down, hell to even convince him to come into hiding with him but Wilbur was blinded by rage and being manic and Philza realized he was too far gone.. so he killed him :3

And Phil left the scene since he was not supposed to be there— no one knew he was there except techno.

And Dream the bastard man saw that as he was hiding and thought he could use Wilbur as a way to win the war, so Dream revived Wilbur.

And the second Wilbur revealed himself to be “alive” to everyone he turned on Dream in literal seconds.

And it led to Dream going to Pandora’s vault c:

[gloamvonhrym]

oh I never posted all my silly phoenicis worldbuilding (birdbuilding) that I did while in fanfic writing hell

here’s a huge mostly-boring set of notes expanding and/or playing havoc with canon. I’m putting it here for future reference. maybe to link to it for funsies if I ever post this hell fic

phoenicis is a small insular nation with little social hierarchy, living on inhospitable mountains inaccessible to anyone except other birds. phoenicis has therefore evolved on a somewhat separate cultural track from everybody else in tellius. in this essay I will

economy/practical shit

implicitly in canon hawks are intensely community-oriented. again, they’re a small nation without much hierarchy, and with some preference for chaos. they all “just do what needs to be done”, paraphrasing ulki. they’re not the Strong Guys for the heck of it: they work together to protect & care for their own, and harbor a strong sense of collective duty and trust.

so they’re commies

with serenes out of the picture they’re the biggest commies in tellius

they don’t have currency, that’s some human shit. to each according to their need etc

(exactly how small and close-knit is. phoenicis? small enough that kilvas, a similarly small nation with even fewer resources, could kill everyone on the home front in basically a day when it was left undefended. so. take that for what it is)

infrastructure

minor architecture tangent: we don’t see much of phoenicis & kilvas except for the exteriors of their respective castles, which is kinda boring. obviously not everyone lives in the castles. but phoenicis DOES have some other visible infrastructure, namely the funky detail of these open doorways built into both the castle itself and the surrounding cliffs:

(I don’t know if there’s any kind of proper name for these, because obviously irl we don’t need them and they’re not a thing. I’ve been calling them sky doors, and I might have nabbed that from rebecca roanhorse’s ��between earth and sky”, although idk if she in turn nabbed it from anyone else)

anyway there appears to be no actual barrier on these, at least not externally. what did I say. commies. who’s gonna rob and kill you in your own home, in your little nation-commune, where nobody except other birds can get to you, and everyone trusts everyone else to do their duty and provide for each other. (the answer is that other birds will betray you, eventually. sad!)

anyway it’s boring to stick around the castle 100% of the time. I imagine that this architectural idea continues down into the valleys, where maybe artisans can make stuff and services can be provided and bargain economy shit can happen

hawks have seemingly only been pirates for the last 20 years or so, and they do piracy for the sake of vengeance rather than need, and they can’t do that much of it because there aren’t a ton of them; and unlike kilvas, they abstain from trade with the whole rest of the continent, and are isolationist by choice. so they must be self-sufficient in basically every way. someone’s got to be making fabric, making clothes, making shoes, forging metals, creating pottery, creating music and art, administering medicine, providing education, etc, somewhere.

healthcare

tangent about medicine: phoenicis is probably the only nation in the continent that has historically had no contact with healing magic at all. the herons had innate healing magic, and everyone else either has human mages or contact with human mages. but phoenicis is on its own. their medical science is therefore more advanced by irl standards, because it has to be. they know more shit about practical mundane antitoxins, antibiotics, wound dressing, surgeries, anesthetics, and complications. it’s less pleasant than magical means, but it works.

(canonically, healing magic works on wounds and not so much things like regular illnesses, so everyone’s still got some mundane medical care; but when that’s ALL you’ve got, I think it follows that you necessarily come to understand the pure mundane science better than most other people. I bet phoenicis has bred its share of real scientists. if anyone in tellius is going to invent electricity,) (also: they might value physical strength very much, but because they’re commies, I figure they take care of their sick/disabled/injured pretty well, and most of them are at terms with the fact that not everyone can be the Strongest Guys. reyson’s complex about being too weak to live is likely more due to survivor’s guilt, helplessness to protect others/wreak revenge personally, and a post-traumatic focus on violence as a primary determinant of outcomes, rather than any actual pervasive cultural messaging that he’s useless.)

age

hawks live to some, what, 300+ years? janaff says a 24 year old should barely be speaking, but I feel like his ass was just being dramatic, similar to the way we needle real-life 18 year old adult humans about being tiny babies. there’s no reason why any creature should take 20+ years to be at least functional, that would be a huge evolutionary disadvantage. I posit that hawk adolescence is considered to last roughly age 20 to 70 (with heron adolescence lasting somewhat longer, given their longer lifespan; maybe to 80-85, such that reyson has somewhat recently hit true adulthood by the time PoR rolls around).

teenagers are stupid. hawk teenagers are REALLY stupid. chaos predilection + hormones. many of them will gleefully pick a fight over any dumb thing and be horny about it. strong with the vigor of youth, but exceptionally poor sense of their own limitations

by age 100+, their temperament evens out; but any contender for the king’s power is probably going to come from the young crowd at any given time. speaking of which,

government

there isn’t much of one. phoenicis is not big. everyone knows everyone and they’re very efficient commies so everything gets done that needs to get done. tibarn has 2 dumbass advisors. who needs a secretary of state.

the title of king goes to “the strongest” (I assume the intent is that this is determined by combat, against self-selected challengers who get to take over if they win, wakanda style). although canonically, his power is that he gets to call some shots but doesn’t really get any special privileges or reverence beyond that, which is nice because it means that if the king became super unpopular, the rest of phoenicis could probably depose him without much trouble if they wanted to. no divine rights here.

(worth noting: I think tibarn’s characterization is super different between fe9 and fe10, with RD tibarn being a lot sassier and more informal. FEH skewed towards the RD vibe, and I think they were right for that. given the hawks’ uniquely relaxed philosophy towards royalty, their insular culture, and the likelihood that they all knew tibarn by name before he ever had a title, it wouldn’t make sense for them to do a lot of formalized bowing and scraping. RD tibarn would never have unironically addressed caineghis as “o majestic king of lions” or whatever he said)

(by contrast, apparently, in japanese, reyson consistently addresses tibarn formally (and also naesala, up until naesala betrays him). I don’t speak japanese and can’t really count this as an aspect of my experience of these characters, but I wonder if the other birds also address each other in this way, or if it’s a trait peculiar to reyson.)

family

families are not nuclear. hawks raise their kids pretty communally, foremost in unstructured “flocks” (households or clusters of households). actual bio parents may or may not be closely involved

parenting is kind of hands-off overall. the concept of adult supervision falls away pretty fast. “let your kid do the stupid dangerous thing so that he learns what’s stupid and dangerous” ass culture; learning by experience is optimal, and if you’re not adequately responsible then others are less likely to be sympathetic and/or have your back in turn. hawk kids tend to gain squads quickly, and they often hang together for life ride or die

if a young hawk is neglected or entirely rejected by their home flocks - rare, but not impossible - likely someone else will pick up the slack, if not adults then some loyal friends

relevant headcanons: tibarn, ulki, and janaff have been sticking together since an early age. ulki in particular had some problems - his original family did not appreciate that he kept overhearing things he shouldn’t, and he was way too autistic to know what was meant to not be repeated, so after not too long he became a bit of a lone wolf. tibarn and janaff already knew each other - janaff’s exceptional sight didn’t cause him any similar problems; and were initially concerned with ulki’s misfit status, but his ability was a valuable bonus. they all adopted each other.

food

the main thing hawks don’t do is cook. because they mostly eat raw meat, fish, and bugs, which is very sexy of them. I imagine every household has certain members designated to hunt regularly on its behalf. add that one to the chore chart

(maybe someone starts experimenting more with cooking when herons are there, and further when phoenicis is open to international relations. for fun and community!)

gender

ok the shit I made up, let’s go off the rails

hawks are queer-normative. in that they don’t give a shit about the anatomy or superficial presentation of who sleeps with whom. most of them are equal-opportunity in that regard

they are, however, by human standards, masc-centric to a sort of absurd degree. they’re not dumb senseless brutes (see again, commies, intense intra-community trust); they’re also probably not the most emotionally available fellas

(“but wouldn’t this level of intra-community trust result in greater emotional availability, not less?” look I’m not saying they’re scared of it. but why would you cry out your feelings with some other guy when you could be killing animals or committing piracy about it.)

gender presentation: I said equal-opportunity in terms of sexuality. might be because it’s a little difficult to tell. the games appear to have no female hawk characters but in MY headcanons their presentation is just masc-centric across the board, and maybe they skew a little less sexually dimorphic in general, so you wouldn’t know anyway

most hawks are he/hims. that’s just a quirk. like discworld dwarves but with less to say about it. just a nation of butches, for fun

bad gender parity in the tellius games? how do you know janaff isn’t a he/him lesbian

hawk dress is largely unisex, earth-toned, and utilitarian. not necessarily fully unadorned - tibarn has an earring & a few other things, including a necklace (feathers; battle trophies?) - but he’s still pretty rugged. nobody is flashy.

nothing AGAINST conventionally feminine presentation per se. hawks would chafe against overly rigid norms. but the way medieval-fantasy femininity looks, they’d probably think it’s a little odd in a practical sense. but who knows. maybe leanne starts something with those she/her pronouns and flowy dresses yk.

(tangent on clothing: phoenicis isn’t really friendly for something like cotton crops, but they can have wool, because goats & sheep can live on mountains. I’m also happy to make up that there’s some kind of hardy tellius breed of mulberry-adjacent tree, which can grow at least somewhere in phoenicis, resulting in the availability of silk and maybe barkcloth. or something. idk I’m not that kind of historian.)

sexuality

hawks primarily value strength, physical + emotional. we knew this. again, doesn’t make for the greatest emotional intelligence. overt softness is not the thing. tibarn kind of sucks at the direct empathy that reyson claims all living beings share, for instance. 2 hawks in a fight would rather tussle it out than waste time talking.

this carries over. in a partner, again, attraction tends to disregard sexed anatomy, but the most valuable thing is being well-matched physically. being creatures of chaos, they trust their impulses, they like a challenge, they don’t mind a fight, and they probably don’t super want to be with someone they have to worry about hurting

(hence that kind of hot chemistry between tibarn & nailah. also janaff hits on lucia at first glance bc she’s a knight obviously she’s got some beef babeyy)

pursuant: by and large, hawks really don’t find herons very attractive. that delicate graceful peaceful affect is kind of a mystifying ideal to them. it’s like art - nice to look at, ig, but what would you actually do with it. people significantly weaker than you are for you to protect, not sleep with. tibarn is a notable exception because he is down bad for reyson

and reyson is like an alien, and tibarn is maybe a bit of a freak for being into someone so fragile. you are the very strongest guy, tf you want with a boy who breaks if you look at him wrong. what do you get out of that sir. he has complexes about this :) but I’m not going to elaborate on that because that’s what hell fic is for

“herons in phoenicis: conceptualizing the vulnerable body in hawk-normative society”, the title of my tellius gender studies thesis at the university of crimea or whatever

speaking of reyson. what does this mean for him. I need to talk about it because I’m obsessed with him. the commie stuff isn’t that much of a culture shock at least

but have some added fuckery: sole survivor, adapting to another culture, learning another language; lone chaos-sensitive empath in a sea of macho chaos-oriented dudes who aren’t very attuned to that kind of thing; also extremely physically distinctive in a way that is kind of weird at best

how do you even maintain a sense of personal identity when the baseline relevant factor is “you’re incomprehensibly different from everyone around you in every way possible”? I think reyson experiences some Gender about this. the most masculine heron is still a lily reed compared to even a fairly femme hawk

reyson’s gender, per the rest of the continent: male. reyson’s gender among hawks: heron

I imagine leanne is somewhat shielded from this once she comes round - she’s able to lean on reyson and naesala, and I figure she does, pretty heavily, considering she picks up maybe a few words of the modern tongue over the course of 3 years. she’s deliberately feminine, and also has already chosen her own terrible boyfriend [affectionate]. she’s not without her own traumas, but she’s more supported, and maybe is even in a place to kind of enjoy the confusion & attention she garners from being the sole girly-girl. I feel like she would.

and her terrible boyfriend [affectionate] is a raven, not a hawk. and by contrast, ravens are VERY attracted to herons. because herons are pretty. and ravens like shiny pretty things.

misc

I’m not quite committed enough to make constructed-culture art, but in my mind hawk visual & aural culture resembles late antique/early modern celtic styles in a few ways. insular culture yk. some book of kells bullshit.

(kinda weird, upon reflection, that phoenicis isn’t full of ancient tongue speakers, considering serenes was allegedly one of the few nations they were ever friendly with. and yet even tibarn understands very little ancient. at the very least, being the most isolated nation, it would make sense for the hawks to have their own modern dialect. but they don’t, that would have been hard for an FE game to pull off, and I’m not enough of a linguist to try. so it is what it is! maybe, even though they don’t fraternize with other nations, they’ve always kept pretty close tabs on them just in case, the necessity of spying facilitated the shift to modern. whereas serenes never did that. anyway sometimes the hawks sound a little irish in my head.)

they are also superstitious. all those lonely windswept coastal peaks, there’s a lot of howling winds, spooky nooks, weird environmental physics interacting with weather phenomena. you end up with stories about folk monsters. hawks know shit about ghosts, fairies, sirens, and banshees, and how to placate them if you piss them off. also the herons sometimes scare people to death because they wear nothing but white and drift around like specters.

I also have a lot of headcanons about herons. but they’re more feelingsy. so I’ll leave that go. I might add to this as I remember more stuff

[lilioopdf]

I JUST READ YOUR PEPE FIC AND OMG ITS SO CUTEEEE IM SQUEALING IM CRYING IM GIGGLING IM KICKING MY FEET WHAT DO I NEED TO DO FOR A BEST FRIENDS TO LOVERS ARC WHAT DO I NEED TO DO FOR A UNI ROMANCE

This is also amazing comfort after my “best friend” (we’ve been disgustingly down bad for each other since we were fifteen but just never did anything about it) left for uni again (we’re in our second years so this is the second goodby) and he kissed me right before he left for uni last year lmao because I wasn’t coming back home for either Xmas or Easter and my family and I had a long ass summer vacay planned so he panicked coz he wasn’t gonna see me for over a year then and we’re not dating because we’re on separate continents for uni 🫶 basically she fell first he fell harder but we just didn’t get the timing right like Jim and Pam

SHUT UP OH MY GODDDD i did not expect to receive an ask like this today but im so grateful i did because

1) i’m SO HAPPY to know that you loved the fic aaaa 💗💗this one is definitely very close to my heart so to know that it influenced you into wanting a uni romance too?? my job here is done 🤭🤭

2) cutest yet most heartbreaking thing ive read today like all that just for the timing to not be right?? ☹️☹️ are you both still in contact though? like as friends or best friends or… otherwise? idk if im just delusional or if i just have a very innocent viewpoint on relationships but i always think it could work out if you really wanted it to (if not now, then later) but i also believe that sometimes things just can’t work out if there’s too much hurt surrounding certain things in the relationship even if you really do love the person yk?

ive always wanted a childhood best friends to lovers trope like its been my favourite trope for years and will continue to be until the day i die but i don’t have any male childhood best friends i could marry and the only ones that come close are the sons of my dad’s friends that i met like… once or twice when i was 5 and 7 so no way

also im just not attracted to people in my country for lots of reasons but anyway! the things i would do to experience a childhood best friends to lovers trope (teenage love to adult lovers just doesn’t hit the same in my opinion) UGDHHDDJ and pepe just fits that trope perfectly though don’t you think 😊💞

have a lovely lovely day/night ahead!! thank u for sharing this with me because it made my very busy and fun day 100x better so i hope everything ends up working out with you and your best friend (if you still want it to ofc 🫣🤭) take care! 💗💗

[ae-neon]

There are 6 queens and 3 realms right? well then aren’t there one queen per realm with a co-monarch?? But if that’s the case, that would mean they are lesbians and sjm writing actual representation for lgbtq?? Can’t believe it but maybe the queens aren’t sisters but cousins and that would be why they’re related to one another while the kingdoms are kept "separated"

or maybe 3 of the queens were sisters married to the kings of the different realms and are sent as representative?? But then i can’t explain the other 3 queens because if they were just servants thy wouldn’t be considered queens

or potentially there are 3 realms and each is divided into 2 "sub realms" which would mean tte 6 queens unite 2 by 2 to "assemble" each of the three realms (what in the marvel universe is this???)

Am i putting too much thought in this? I don’t know

Too much thought? Maybe, maybe not. But one thing is for sure: it's more than the author herself.

Lets start with the mortal lands themselves. There are 3 kingdoms existing under the Wall on the Continent: Scythia, Neva and Bharat.

Neva (Russian? Spanish?) is said to be a city. Papa A travels there to trade with merchants and attends a summit about the threat of Hybern on Prythian.

Scythia (Greek) is referred to as a "Realm/Kingdom" but is also said to be the smallest of the realms ruled by the queens (smaller than a city???) It's known for trade and horses.

Bharat (Indian) doesn't have much of a description but is also a place of trade, namely spice and cloth.

Now the queens. Only three are named. Vassa, Demetra (the golden queen) and Briallyn. The other 3 are older. A is brown skinned. B is fair skinned and C is dark skinned.

Vassa and Demetra are both Greek names so it might make sense for them to be the rulers of the region of Scythia. (Sparta had 2 kings so that's not unheard of)

A and C having darker skin fits them more in Bharat. (Maybe the region is called Bharat but within are two kingdoms?? Maybe they are married or twin sisters or represent two different groups in the region)

B and Briallyn could be the rulers of Neva. (Is is one city so the co-queen doesn't make sense unless they are married or twin sisters or something)

But that still doesn't explain the relationship between all the group of queens. (Especially because sjm makes it sound like they all live in one castle in the middle of the continent?)

So let's say the continental kingdoms have an alliance and because of that a central castle was built. I think that's the best explanation I can give

(maybe that's why it's not a big deal that Vassa is living in Prythian instead of returning to Scythia, they're used to not having their rulers around. Doesn't explain why she has no guards or entourage tho)

[jiminy-crickets]

make a new post with the names of all the files in your wip folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! then, tag as many people as you have wips.

Aaaaughhhhh @nightshadehasblorbos omg tytyty I can’t wait to info dump about my beloved WIPs

I’m tagging @mercurymilkcap (ty bestie for letting me yap at you about my fics) and @v8mpvrse (again ty for letting me yap) and literally anyone else who wants to do this <3

Obsessed

Mattdrai with past mcdrai, takes place from 2018 to the november 20th Edmonton Florida Game of this last season, it’s a song fic based off of Obsessed by Olivia Rodrigo, and it is from Matthew’s POV as he spends YEARS feeling like a bad boyfriend for obsessing over Leon and Connor’s long since ended ‘friends with benefits’ esque situationship, but it’s mostly about just falling in love how how to be a good boyfriend when you are both closeted public figures who have to keep up appearances of being rivals, and surviving long distance and what it’s like when you haven’t even met each others parents because you can’t come out because your father is a blabermouth with a history of hating you for being gay, the mortifying ordeal of coming out to your teammates and having them think you are actually dating your boyfriends ex, and figuring out how many ways you can have phone sex to forget about the thousands of kilometres between you and the love of your life.

Winners room trope exploration

It’s what it says on the tin, this is a doc with a bunch of half finished ideas, and outlined one shots exploring the logistical side of winners room verse, I made up a fun new job position “player health coordinator” who on paper are essentially health advocates for players and make sure that the team doctor is acting in the players best interest not the teams, but do double duty as being the people who organize rooms, and make sure the rules and followed and enforced. Also they gossip with each other and have a group chat where they are like ‘XYZ is being a little bitch lately, do NOT let him in rooms with dudes who are doormats, it will NOT end well” and “please remind visitors to XYZ arena that the room has shut sound insulation, the things I have heard would make a sailor blush” but these fics are mostly just like explorations of the culture around rooms, what teams let the winners pick? What teams pull straws? What is it like when you are dating someone and you meet them in the rooms? What players do people never pick from unspoken rules? What’s it like as a rookie? Etc etc etc

Lake House: Kiss Me Over The Garden Gate

This is my baby!!!! Quinn/Brady “secret dating” (everyone knows) the title kiss me over the garden gate is a type of flower that Quinn grows in the garden Brady made for him at the lake house <3 it’s about being tender and domestic and in love with your boyfriend of almost a decade for the short amount of time you have together before you need to go back to other sides of the continent and separated by five timezones… it’s also about how a LOT of queer teens/young adults want families, kids, white picket fence etc etc, and how it can seem impossible to achieve and how being closeted public figures who lives across the country from your LONG TERM boyfriend is hell, and how some days it seems like you will never get the life you want with one annother…. But mostly this fic is about Brady and Quinn being gross and sappy and in love and Jack, Luke and Matthew third wheeling them and they can’t even say “ew you guys are gross and in love and we hate third wheeling yall” because they made a pact when they realized Brady and Quinn were dating that they would let them come out when they were ready… but they made that pact seven years ago and oh my GOD can they be ready to come yet???

I know what boys like

Sid being a dude magnet at clubs and being all coy and not actually letting them hit because he’s a TEASE (and a closet case) and also because it’s MUCH much more entertaining to make dudes think they are about to hook up with Sidney Crosby then go “this is was fun… bye” before hopping in the closest taxi and speeding away to go jack off in his hotel room. Anyways he tries this trick with Colby and Colby is having NONE of it he’s like “sid!! I know your tricks I am wise to them!!! You cannot do this to me, I won’t let you!!!” Sid does however succeed in making Colby think they are gonna hook up… and they do!!! And it’s very sweet <3 (song fic based off of I know what boys like by the waitresses)

Guess

I’m not 10000% sure on the pairing, but… the vibes are telling me it’s two leafs, this is yet another song fic based off of guess by Charli xcx, and it’s very much living upto the chorus “you wanna guess the colour of my underwear, you wanna know what I got going on down there, is it pretty in pink or all see through? Is it showing off my brand new lower back tattoo? You wanna put it in your mouth, pull it all down south, you wanna turn this shit out that’s what I’m talking about, you wanna try it bite it lick it spit it pull it to the side and get all up in it, wear em post em might remix it send it to the dare yeah I think he’s with it” and “guess how much money I just took from this deal, guess the password to my google drive, you wanna guess the adresse of the party I’m at, you wanna guess if I’m serious about this song” basically player A just told player B that he’s about to sign a new deal (player A and B are in a FWB situation) and player B is like ‘let’s go out let’s celebrate!!’ And so they do… and right before they get into the Uber to head out player A sends player B a photo of a messy ‘someone just rummaged through here” drawer of panties and poor poor player B spends the entire evening hard and wanting to KNOW what player A is wearing but he can’t ask because ya know closeted athletes in a major hockey market and people eavesdropping, anyways it ends with player B indeed trying, biting, licking, spitting, wearing, pulling to the side and getting all up in player A’s panties.

Girl at home (mcdrai edition)

Wow shock and surprise yet annother song fic, though this one is more playfull teasing based off of the title then actually based on the song (girl at home by taylor swift) its mcdrai (oh and it’s called “mcdrai edition” because years ago I started… and abandoned [sorry to the ao3 commenter who was exited to read the rest] a Sidon/Zelda/Link fic based off of the same song) with background Edmonton polycule, and it’s right after the WCF and Connor is making big puppy eyes at Leon to kiss him in the locker room and Leon is all ‘it’s gonna be so embarrassing to pay a PDA fine as the captain, smh Lauren is gonna be mad if she isn’t the first one to kiss you after that goal’ and Connor is like ‘oh please we both know her and Cel are up in the box three white claws deep dry humping each other infront of the other WAGs’ and Leon is like ‘hehe yeah <3 they areeee <3’ and then they do kiss because Leon is powerless against Connor’s puppy eyes.

Kevin/Connor nesting fluff

Everyone give @pwhl-mybeloved a big round of applause because these two WIPs would NOT be possible without Mary indulging my Connor brainrot and bouncing ideas about how weird and funny he is. Anywaysss THIS fic is gonna put the ‘non traditional’ part of the ‘non traditional A/B/O dynamics’ tag to work lmao, basically in this world being an alpha or an omega is a vestigial trait, and 90% of people will never know what/if they are one, and heats and ruts are most commonly brought on my stress and lifestyle changes… and Connor breaking his jaw and being hopped the fuck up on painkillers send him into heat. But again its not a traditional omegaverse heat, plus the fact that he’s on hella painkillers he just makes himself a nest in the shooting room at the practice facility (using whatever things and gear he found around the facility) and camps himself out sleeping, walking up and practicing as much as the trainers allow him, and drinking protein smoothies, Kevin tries to get his sweater back from Connors nest and Connor is VERY firm on that not happening, but he does let Kevin in to cuddle and they chat and nap, and it’s very sweet and fluffy and Connor is high and passively horny so he’s just happy someone is taking care of him without telling him “no Connor you can’t practice big shots! No Connor you can’t skate!!”

Road Roomies (it’s not gay if I don’t kiss you)

Yet annother Connor/Kevin fic we all can thank @pwhl-mybeloved for, this one was gonna be a simple one shot… and then it grew… a lot. I think I can still make it work as a one shot but it’s gonna be LONG. And yeah, it’s road roommates + masturbation based hockey superstition/ritual + the mortifying ordeal of being on a team that fucking sucks and they keep looking at the new kid to fix it + having a crush on the one person you really fucking shouldn’t (x2) + how to come out when you have spent the last few road games jacking off in proximity to one annother + miscommunication (very brief though, because I don’t like miscommunication as a trope) and then to quote my outline “they just fall into bed and exchange sweet puppy love big cow eyes looking at each other tender kisses on the others nose soft and sweet handjobs”

Muahahahaha I love yapping about my WIPs <333333 yippeeeee

[bropunzeling]

Director's commentary, anything from mattdrai soulmate AU (or future snippets!)

hello anon! gosh it's been a while since ive looked at this one; here's the early section where they are in germany and going for a little walk:

Leon harries Matthew until they’re both dressed and ready to go, grabbing a spare key from the table in the hall. The weather outside, once they get there, isn’t too bad; it’s a little brisk, but nothing that either of them can’t handle compared to an Alberta spring. Matthew still looks shivery, though, hands tucked into his sweatshirt pocket and head bowed. [poor bondsick matthew! in all seriousness figuring out how to portray bondsickness was honestly really fun - just being a pathetic lil mess until someone touches you. idk if i ever said so explicitly in the fic/fully committed, but in my head/memory as of now, i think it's one of those things that is not so much caused by physical distance but by emotional distance. they haven't figured out/reconciled their feelings = you get sick. leon leaving was just a triggering event. but the beauty of never saying so explicitly is i can't get it wrong either way lmao.]

“Hey,” Leon says, bumping Matthew with his elbow until Matthew looks up. “You okay?” he asks, feeling like a broken record, but there’s not—what else is he supposed to do? [leon just actively flailing throughout the whole of the 2022 sections was also fun. he's a demonstrative guy but it's hard to be demonstrative when you don't have a clear sense of what either of you want. also, he is not yet willing to internally acknowledge how important matthew is to him, so he's just gonna... kinda suck at it.]

“Yeah,” Matthew says flatly. There’s big purple circles under his eyes. It makes Leon think again about how badly Matthew’s taking it, much worse than how Leon’s doing. Sure, he supposes he didn’t feel great for the twenty hours they were separated by an ocean, but he also didn’t look like he’d been run over by a zamboni. [bc you are not in emotional turmoil my guy]

Leon knows, at this point, that he should know better, but he’s still not sure how exactly all of this works. Bond-sickness is a thing from romance novels and weepy made-for-TV movies, not for a couple of hockey players who are regularly a continent apart. [again because it's an emotional thing, and leon isnt ready to clue into the emotional aspects of their relationship - purposefully oblivious] Leon leaving shouldn’t have done anything, he’s pretty sure. What difference would the Atlantic make, compared to North America? [bc you ~left~ him/aren't easily accessible anymore!]

Besides, in every depiction of bond-sickness he’s seen—which was mostly the one movie Kim watched on repeat when she was thirteen, some weepfest based on a Nicholas Sparks novel that Leon got so sick of he threatened to snap the DVD in half [my favorite thing about writing aus is figuring out alternate media for aus. i love a shitty reality tv concept. i love a bad romance novel. i love an ed sheeran ballad. it's the most fun part and also is such an easy way to add color and a sense of heft to your world building.]—it always happens to both sides of the bond. He’s pretty sure that if Matthew’s sick, he should be too, or else neither of them should be. [more hinting at one-sidedness] Which—that’s something he’s not sure he wants to interrogate too closely.

“Here,” Leon says finally, pulling at Matthew’s arm until he finally manages to get at Matthew’s hand. “Let me just—”

The second his fingers wrap around Matthew’s, Leon has a sensation of realignment, like one of his joints has eased back into place. Matthew starts to look more alive, color returning to his face as he sighs with relief. It’s kind of fucked up, how much touching makes things better, but it’s kind of cool, too, that this is all it takes. [one of my fave lines! (a) i think that would be the appeal of a thing like a bond to me, that you can make each other feel better and (b) i like it as an unconscious acknowledgement on leon's part that he wants matthew to feel better. he gives a shit! it isn't really platonic anymore even if he can't see that or admit it]

“This okay?” Leon asks, darting a glance at Matthew before looking down the street.

“Yeah,” Matthew says, fingers squeezing once. “I mean—if you don’t mind.”

“Whatever will help,” Leon says, more sincerely than he means to.

Leon started their walk without any destination in mind, but it isn’t far from his parents’ new house to the west bank of the Rhine. Once they get to the river, they stop, looking out at the Rodenkirchen bridge, huge and coppery green; the trees dotting the riverbank on the opposite side; the water reflecting the bridge as it flows north. There are ducklings following their parents down through the current, people walking past with dogs and strollers or only themselves. It’s peaceful to be around other people, to hear pieces of their conversation and the rush of the river and Matthew’s steps in time with his own. [i never made it to cologne but it looks really gorgeous in pictures! love a big bridge by the river. fixes me every time]

He wonders what it’s like for Matthew, somewhere unfamiliar, where not even the background noise is the same. [there's a thing about this that like, is tricky to articulate but i'll do my best lol - when they were both in alberta, they were both far from/couldn't always go home, which is a theme i find compelling (see marriage bets) but leon is obviously more separated. and during the 2022 sections of the fic, it was fun to explore matthew as the one far from home, in an unfamiliar environment, with leon as the one fixed point. idk! it's a fun theme.]

“Want to go farther?” he offers, tugging their hands towards the river. “Not too bad right now.”

Matthew nods, fingers tightening around Leon’s. “Sure,” he says. “If you want to.”

“Yeah,” Leon says. Now that he’s looking at Matthew, it’s like he’s gotten stuck, gaze snagged on Matthew’s eyes, as clear and blue as the spring sky. [ur in love with him. hope that helps.] He has to blink hard before he can look away, back to the tree-lined path and the river ahead. “Yeah, I want to.”

They spend another half an hour walking down the river and back, until it’s too cold to continue. [i just love a romantic walk!] Then they turn down into the neighborhood, wandering streets that should be more familiar to Leon than they are. [another bit of that far from home theme; what even is home in the first place if you've spent your adult life somewhere else?] Eventually they find a café and Leon gets them coffee, more to warm their hands more than anything else. Matthew stumbles through a “Danke schön” when he takes his.

“Did you practice or something?” Leon asks, raising his eyebrows.

The tips of Matthew’s ears flush, [he has been practicing for at minimum six months and at least a year. maybe started during those summer calls. he has an irrational hatred for the duolingo owl] and he takes a long sip of coffee. Leon decides not to push. It’s just—unexpected, is all.

Eventually they find their way back to the right street. Matthew’s shivering again. Leon should’ve given him one of his heavier jackets; they’re close enough to the same size. [them being the same build is important and sexy to me] He’ll remember next time.

“You good?” he asks again.

Matthew nods, takes another sip of coffee. “This is strong,” he says, narrowing his eyes.

“I’ve been telling you, your coffee is shit,” Leon says easily, accepting the misdirection. [european coffee just is better. alas.]

“Just because you’re a snob,” Matthew retorts, and they’re back to not quite normal, but closer. When Matthew nearly shoves him off the sidewalk mid-argument, it’s practically a relief. [they will always be a little bit butting heads but in a fun flirty way :)]

[phaeton-flier]

What do you think gay men are attracted to in men that they can’t be attracted to in women?

It can’t be anything about femininity or masculinity obviously. That’s both sexist, and cultural so can’t be what drives men-only attraction.

It can’t be anything about stated identity because someone could lie just as easily as they could tell the truth in such a statement, and it makes no sense because homosexuality and heterosexuality exists in other species with no stated identities. It’s not like other animals without gender are all pan.

Saying idk it’s the vibes or some indescribable trait men have that women can’t but “I can’t explain” is a nonanswer.

Soooooooo what is it? Or do you think any sexuality but bi/pan is just cultural performance or an identity rather than an inborn orientation?

- [ ]

Oh this one's easy, you're confusing the concept of a category as a useful way to separate out semi-differentiated blobs when communicating with other humans with categories that are fundamental to reality. Continents are categories of the first kind ("We call this blob of land Europe, and this blob of Asia, but that one the Americas because they're connected" "But they're not disconnected! Why not call them Eurasia?" "Because that's what everyone else calls them.") and Particle Physics has categories of the second kind ("This one is a proton because it has these properties, this one is called a neutron because it has these properties", and no proton has neutron-like properties)

Sexuality is a category of the first kind. When a woman asks a man on a date, and he says "Sorry, I'm gay." this isn't meant to say that he can strictly define what is and isn't a man, and then is attracted to all men and no women; It's to say "I'm not a potential partner for romance." (It also functions as a way to soften a rejection; "You're just not attractive to me." is harsher to hear than "I'm just not attracted to the category of person you are.", even if for practical purposes they have the same effect in the moment.)

Like, it's not like you can open up a person's metaphorical object instance and see the "ATTRACTION" parameter inside set to either "gay", "straight", "bi", or "ace"; its more that a wide variety of things that make up a person can be attractive or unnattractive. Alice likes Red Hair and short height and this angle of cheekbones and this kind of voice, and that kind of humor, thousands of facts about a person, all of which influence whether or not she's attracted to them. And if you looked at all the idioscynratic ways every individual on earth has attraction, if you could see that 10-dimensional vector space, you would not find clear sharp delinations. Just big blobs that you can sorta cut around.

I do think you could see semi-obvious places to draw your categories, if you wanted to, the same way you can look down from space and see the isthmus of Panama and go "Oh, we should call those two seperate continents, that's a good place for one to end and another to start". I suspect a big category of traits you could call "masculine" and a big category of traits you could call "feminine", but you're not going to get easy categories like "Men who only like masculine traits" or "Men who only like people who define as men" without any overlap or weird edges. There are going to be people who like mostly feminine traits that also like beards, or wide shoulders, or being able to gut a fish or whatever.