#can you imagine that discussion between Buck & Chris though | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

chevelleneech · 6 months ago

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Thoughts for 7x08-8x01

(This is basically just a rambling of thoughts. Read if you want, message me if you want to expand or discuss any part of it, but leave me alone if you’re just going to bitch.)

I have no idea what to expect tomorrow!

Tbh, I hope there’s serious scenes between Amir and Bobby, and I hope Amir isn’t like the kid from s2. I’d actually really enjoy it being a hostage situation, but with Bobby eventually talking him down while at the same time unfortunately walking himself back into a darker mindset.

Because I can’t imagine meeting someone whom you physically altered in a horrible accident, wherein you also killed people, wouldn’t trigger something. And knowing how su*c*dal Bobby was in the first two seasons, Amir being one of Bobby’s victims would be seriously hard on his growth. So it would be interesting to me to see Bobby forgive Amir for whatever he may do, because he is back to feeling like he got more time and happiness than he deserved anyway.

I don’t want Bobby to die, mind you, but ending the season with him seriously injured would be the first one I think we’ve had where we have to wait a seasonal hiatus to find out if the character survives. Tim said he doesn’t want to kill anyone off, but that doesn’t mean the actors can’t choose to leave. If not an injury though, I think ending the season with both Bobby and Amir trapped in a fire would also work.

(This just made me think of how I would have restructured a lot of this season. Maybe I’ll make a post about not?)

Anyway, yeah I’m really intrigued to see how Bobby’s storyline will wrap up the season, because I was feeling like he and Athena got away a little too easy from the cruise ship arc. A lot of this season has felt one and done, with no lasting emotional turmoil. Eddie is gearing up to take some damage, but Bobby already said he essentially overstayed his welcome when he was willing to hold Athena up so she wouldn’t drown. Having that feeling circle back around after being confronted with someone he almost killed? Yes, good.

Circling back to Eddie, I would like to see him fall apart, but I also think I’m in the minority here who isn’t sure it needs to be horrible. I think for as uncertain of himself as Eddie clearly is, he is also self-aware because he has to be for Chris. So what would be most interesting to me, is seeing him lose Chris. Not custody wise, but trust wise.

I think Chris is at an age (12-14) where kids start to see their parents as people, and him finding out Eddie is cheating on his already relatively new girlfriend whom Chris likes, with a woman who either looks like his dead mother or who his dad is convinced looks like her, would be such a great way to integrate Chris into the back portion of the season while also allowing him to grow up as well.

Gavin is the only kid on the show who doesn’t get mature storylines, and while I understand his contract might be different or his health may prevent him from being on set as often, I do think they can give him bigger pieces to play with now. So for me, seeing Chris tell Eddie he doesn’t like who he has become, would be fantastic. It would also tie perfectly into Eddie feeling isolated from his friends and family. Not to mention, if Chris is the one who calls his grandparents to ask for help for Eddie, Eddie is 100% going to think they came to take him away, and lash out more.

So I don’t want Eddie to completely break the way he did before, but having to realize his mistakes and excuses don’t affect just him, would be a good story. And it still leaves room for him potentially discovering feelings or a lack thereof for women in a way he never allowed himself to confront.

With Buck�� my mind is blank. I’ve said before I think they wrapped up his coming out arc way too fast, so now he is one of the only lead characters not doing anything. I want more for Athena, but I feel like she could end up part of Bobby’s storyline. Hen and Karen are settling in with Mara, and I honestly think that’s the most consistent plots this season. I am tired of that being like their entire journey, however. They’ve been wanting a second child for like six seasons. Tim needs to let them keep Mara and move on to something that brings Karen further into the fold as a series main.

Back to Buck! Idk. I think we should have seen him single this season or at least be friends with Tommy as they built up to their relationship. Even if it’s meant to be fleeting, some form of a foundation would’ve been nice. I already said I think the jealousy arc was pointless and didn’t do the job it was meant to, if we’re speaking specifically on BuckTommy. As the ship itself is sailing solely on the fact that two men kissed. Because again, Buck has done nothing this season except realize he’s bisexual and tell people, which took two episodes out of ten. Now he’s just around, and kisses Tommy when they need a reason for Tommy to be on screen.

Thus far, nothing about this character development took its time. Nothing about his budding relationship unfolded as we got to know Tommy or what Buck is actually feeling about being queer and being out. Maybe that’ll come within the next two episodes, but I doubt it. And if BuckTommy are still together at season end, s8 will start with them having more development than what they ended with. Unless the season itself picks up at the same spot due to a cliffhanger.

So I guess what I want for Buck is for him to talk to Tommy. For them to end up in an emergency together or for Tommy to be there to pick up the pieces if something happens to Bobby or Eddie, and Buck breaks down about it. I want a reason for why Tommy was kept around, basically. Because he and Buck being acquaintances who kissed did not require this much screen time for Tommy.

Idk. I feel like Tim and company were so afraid of doing the coming out wrong, they ended up doing it poorly. An immediate potential boyfriend for a character they’re tired of writing revolving relationships for, doesn’t make sense. As shown by the lack of development since episode 4.

We didn’t see them realize they were attracted to each other in 7x04. They didn’t even try to become friends in 7x05 as they worked out a date. Tommy didn’t stick around for 7x06 (because that episode was about Madney), and Tommy wasn’t in 7x07 at all. Not even mentioned, I don’t think. So there is factually nothing happening between Buck and Tommy, which I would like to see fixed this season. Unless the plan is for them to not become official, and he’s only here for a short while.

Bringing me to Buddie, which… I have many thoughts, and most of them are pessimistic, lol. Not because I don’t think they’d work in canon, but in the real world I don’t think ABC and Tim are willing to commit for real. Buddie is great for PR sake, but one queer white boy (even a white Latino one!) is enough for them. Which could also explain why Tommy is around for lip service but has no plot, tbh.

So yeah, I don’t know what to anticipate here. If I go with what I hope to see going on with Eddie, then an intervention sort of scenario would probably work best. Maybe Buck is there as a buffer between Eddie and his family or Eddie and whoever potentially confronts him, but when Eddie calls on him to defend him, he can’t because he’s also concerned. Then maybe they go off separately and argue about that which leads to unsaid feelings coming out in the wash? I truly don’t know, but that’s as far as I can see it going if they choose to address it.

If there is no feelings revelations by 7x10 though, then I don’t see it ever happening. I think Tim and the writers are backed into a corner here, and have said over and over the only way I think it can be fixed is by addressing it or calling it quits off screen. And me personally, I’ll take not bringing it up at all in canon this season as them calling it quits, because where else is there for Buddie to go?

Both characters have reached what I would consider pivotal points in their journeys. It’s s7 and whether or not ABC knows they want to take it to 10, s8 has to be something new. I don’t want to go into it wondering: Have Henren finally rounded out their family? Will Eddie find The One? Will Buck find The One? What does this or that Buddie scene mean? Is Athena truly a good or bad cop?

I want to see Athena either forced to retire, put on the stand, or choosing to move up in rank. I want Karen to get a job offer she can’t refuse and the Wilson’s spend at least half the season contemplating moving out of LA. I want Eddie to be single. I want Buck to either be single or develop his current situationship into something lasting. And IF Buck and/or Eddie do have an “Oh” moment in the s7 finale, I want s8 to put in the work to prove it’s been them this whole time but neither realized it.

No more back and forth. No more repetitive storylines. Break the 118 up. Say goodbye to a beloved characters in someway other than death. Move somebody up a rank. Demote or fire somebody. Introduce a new class of probies. Something! Just, be as great as the show has been in the past.

Okay, post over.

#911 abc #bobby nash #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie

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matan4il · 2 years ago

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I guess for me the distance doesn't bother me for the moment for 2 reasons. While we generally agree they have never said they are straight, and most of us on here are the most carefully open minded people IRL.

I have zero doubts that In Canon 911 Buddie thinks the other is straight. If they ever tell me I'm wrong though trust me I won't care. I don't mind being wrong that it was some off the camera discussion and retconned.

But till that day they both think the other isn't a romantic option and probably not into them. They probably sadly just tuck those thoughts away and take them any way they can have them till one moves onto another girlfriend. Yes I gagged writing that!!

2. Even when one comes out, and the other confirms they aren't completely straight.... That doesn't mean they are just gonna jump in. These 2 are the most important people to each other, but also Chris is the most important to them. As Eddie said in 2 it's different dating when you have a kid. Well imagine the person is your kids gaurdian, his safe place to run. Imagine Bucks already huge abandonment issue's, fears of being left. I can still see them being awkward and dancing around it.

I guess I feel strongly I think we are talking something like the grocery store conflict that is what will push them out of the friend zone you know??

Hi lovely Nonnie!

I'm so sorry, this ask must have been in my inbox, but... last few times I was answering asks it wasn't, and now today it suddenly is, so this is probably Tumblr once again glitching. I apologize and am thankful for your understanding! *hugs*

And yes, I agree with you! Neither Buck nor Eddie had formally identified themselves (in fact, I think other than Hen, none of the team members have), but we all live in a society where the default is heterosexual until proven queer. And neither man has done something so far that explicitly identifies them as anything but straight. So yes, like you I believe Buddie currently assume that the other man (a) is straight and (b) has no romantic feelings for them. It's a part of their rom com plot, really.

And you're right, even if they find out the other is queer, that doesn't automatically open up the path to getting together. Beyond everything that you said which might make them hesitate on whether to risk their current r/s, there's also the fact that not every queer man is automatically into any other queer man. There has to be attraction. Even if Buck finds out Eddie is into men, he still won't know whether Eddie is into him. And that would be another satisfying obstacle for them to overcome if and when they go canon... God, they have so much potential to be one of the best love stories on TV ever if they're allowed to get together ('coz they kind of already are, even before they've gone canon), that it makes me wanna chew glass, I'm that feral over them!

I still don't know what's gonna push them over the line of obliviousness 'coz God knows, the most classic trope in that regard is "suddenly your life was in danger and I just couldn't stand my life without you and that's when I knew I was in love with you" and clearly that won't work with these two morons. So whatever happens, it has to be something different to what we've seen going down between them before. IDK what it is, but I'm so excited to find out if and when we do get canon Buddie...

Thank you, and again, so sorry for the delay. Hope you have a great day! As always, here's my ask tag. xoxox

#buddie #911meta #buddie meta #911 meta #9-1-1 #evan buckley #eddie diaz #edmundo diaz #evan buck buckley #ask #anon ask #911 #911onabc #911 on abc #911abc #911 abc

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wrenhyperfixates · 4 years ago

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The Secret Admirer

Pairing: Loki x reader Summary: When he is too nervous to confess his love for you, Loki decides to take on the role of secret admirer. Can a perfect night out with you give him the confidence he needs? Warnings: it’s mainly fluff and some pining with a slightly steamy (but very quick) make-out session A/N: 1) Though I usually aim to write the reader as gender neutral, they are a female in this one. It’s nothing essential to the plot, but Loki does refer to them as a “woman” and “lady”. I apologize to all my readers out there who don’t identify as female, but maybe you could just skip those lines? I promise the next one will be gender neutral again. Thanks for reading :) 2) Thanks to @shypickleghostsuitcase for requesting. This was a lot of fun to write!

Loki watched from around the corner as you walked into the kitchen, ready for your post-workout snack. You frowned as you searched for your favorite fruits, which were nowhere to be found. That is until you spun around and saw a basket filled to the brim with them. Loki was glad to see a smile tugging at your lips as you picked up the little notecard attached by an emerald green ribbon. He sauntered in as you read it.

“Another gift from you secret admirer, I see,” he said, raising his eyebrows at you.

“Yeah,” you replied with shining eyes. “It’s the third one this week.”

“Any clue as to who it might be?”

Loki, in reality, did not need to ask that question. After all, it was him who had been leaving you the presents around the Tower. However, he couldn’t resist an opportunity to see that adorable little blush creep its way onto your face.

“I might have a couple guesses,” came your carefree response.

“And who, might I ask, are they?”

“Well, you know Justin from accounting? I think he’s been dropping hints. Oh! And Chris from R&D has been pretty friendly recently. And he’s cute, too, don’t you think?”

“Yes, yes, whatever,” Loki answered, suddenly becoming very sour.

He’d known about this downside of his little plan, but he was too self-conscious to come right out and invite you on a date. Especially so after hearing you talk about others in this way. So, he resolved to make sure you fell completely for your admirer before coming forward. He made a gruff excuse as he left the room, and you stared on in confusion at his sudden mood swing.

Loki didn’t see you again until dinner, where the topic of conversation was him, not that any of his teammates knew it.

“Five bucks it’s that guy named Lawrence,” Tony speculated. “You know, that agent SHIELD keeps sending as a messenger.”

“Yeah, he does seem pretty fond of you,” Wanda added, playfully elbowing you.

“No way,” Nat argued. “It’s Matthew, that blonde from the labs.”

“Can we please talk about something else? Literally anything?” you pleaded.

“Indeed,” Loki came to your defense, and you shot him an appreciative smile that made his heart skip a beat. “Certainly someone has a different topic to conversate about.”

“Ok, ok,” Bucky conceded. “We’ll stop making guesses.”

“Thank you,” you said.

“So then, who do you want it to be?”

You just shook your head and got up from the table as the rest of the team erupted into a fit of giggles. They called you back as you stormed away with flushed cheeks, but you just flipped them off. When it became clear that no one was going after you, Loki took it upon himself to check on you. Once again fully immersed in their ridiculous guesses, no one noticed as he excused himself from the table.

He called your name as you were stepping into the elevator, and you held the door open for him so he could join you. You were still obviously pissed, and Loki wondered if he should have been like the rest of the team and let you blow off steam. When you fixed your gaze on him, though, your eyes were soft and appreciative. He wanted to get lost in them forever, to jump in and never come out. He certainly would have settled for being lost in a kiss, too, but he wouldn’t want to taint your sweet lips with his venomous ones.

It simultaneously pleased and annoyed him that no one had guessed he was your admirer. On the one hand, it meant that he was doing a good job keeping it a secret. On the other, it probably meant that no one thought you were a good match. Though, if they knew he was the one leaving you the gifts, that might change. After all, they fawned over the fact that you had a secret admirer. Sometimes they even tried to guess what he’d leave next.

“Hey,” you ventured, breaking the silence that had settled in between the two of you. “Thanks for backing me up in there.”

“I assure you it was no problem. The whole discussion was rather irksome, don’t you agree?”

You nodded your head in agreement as the elevator came to a stop. How Loki wished he could put an end to all those debates by just coming forward, but he was certain you wouldn’t feel the same. He was sparing both of you the guilt and embarrassment that would surely accompany his confession. Still, he couldn’t help but imagine holding your hand as you walked side by side, your head resting against him. It would show everyone that you were his. But you weren’t, not yet anyway.

“Um, Loki?” you asked after popping into your room for a second and coming back out with a jacket. “I was going to grab a bite to eat since I didn’t finish dinner and was wondering if you maybe wanted to come?”

Loki froze in his tracks. He knew how you meant it, but it almost sounded as if you were asking him out on a date. Never in his life had he been that lucky, though, so he was certain that wasn’t the case.

“Yes,” he said, masking the eagerness in his voice. “I would like that very much.”

The two of you made your way out onto the busy city streets, and Loki’s heart sped up as you took his hand to keep from getting separated. He knew that it was an innocent gesture, but to anyone else, it would seem as if you were something more than just friends. The very thought made the palpitations of his heart grow louder still.

Usually, Loki avoided going out into the world as much as possible. No one outside the Tower ever did seem to truly trust him and often sent him worried glances as if he might start another invasion right then and there. Being with you, however, seemed to ease everyone’s minds. People still sent him hurried looks that they thought he didn’t notice, but they were far fewer than when he ventured out by himself.

As the two of you stopped at a crosswalk waiting for the light to change, he felt something cold and metallic brush against his wrist. He looked down and saw you wearing the charm bracelet he’d left you about a week ago. It pleased him to know that you liked the gifts, even if you were unaware that he was the one giving them to you. He averted his gaze before you could think anything of it, and a few minutes later, you were pulling him into a storefront, brightly decorated on the outside with red and yellow.

“McDonald’s is one of my favorites,” you explained as the door closed behind you, and you got on line to order. “Are you familiar with it?”

“I cannot say that I am.”

Loki, in fact, was not well acquainted with any of the Midgardian cuisines dubbed “fast food” and squinted at the menu, trying to figure out which of the undoubtedly greasy options was the best. However, he didn’t have to, as you insisted on ordering for him and sent him off to claim a table in the crowded restaurant. He found a small booth tucked in the corner, and you soon joined him, arms filled with the food you’d bought. Loki hesitantly eyed the burger that you had called a BigMac but bit into it after seeing your excited smile. He had to admit; it wasn’t half bad.

After you two had finished eating your burgers and shared some hot fries and chicken nuggets, Loki’s eyes flitted back down to the bracelet around your wrist. This time, you noticed before he could look away.

“It was a gift from my admirer,” you told him, unaware that he already knew this fact.

“Well, I must say, they have excellent taste. Both in jewelry and women.”

You blushed both from the compliment and the intense look in his eyes. “Yeah, I guess. I mean, it’s very flattering, and I do appreciate it. I just kinda wish they’d confess already, you know?”

Loki frowned at that. He was certain that both of you would be disappointed if he came clean. Still, the idea was tempting. But then he’d remember just how many people seemed to be interested in you, and he was once again sure that no number of gifts could buy your affection. He knew that it was a great flaw in his plan, but he could find no better way. Besides, the gifts certainly made you happy, and that was worth it in and of itself.

“Actually,” you continued, “I’m not too sure I really mean that.”

“Why is that?” Loki said, somewhat shocked by your change of heart.

“Well, right now I can pretend that it’s the person I want it to be. But if the admirer comes forward and it’s not them, well, I guess I don’t know what I’d do. The gifts are thoughtful, so I suppose I’d give them a chance. Get to know them and see where it goes.”

“Unless it’s someone you already know and have absolutely no interest in, correct?”

“To be honest, I haven’t really thought much about what would happen if I felt that way. But, yeah, I guess not.”

Loki admired your features as you took on a pensive look, trying to sort through all these puzzling thoughts. He had a lot of thinking to do, too. Right now, it seemed as if his chances were decent. Even if he wasn’t who you’d been hoping for, he might be able to get at least one date with you. Though, he’d put a lot of thought into the possibility that you might have no interest in him, and actually believed it to be the most likely option. But that soft look on your face as you turned your attention back to him did change his mind a little. He made up his mind; he was going to tell you, and he’d do it tonight.

Before he could figure out the proper way to confess, you were dragging the raven haired god out of the restaurant, pursuing your next craving. He quirked an eyebrow at you as you came to a stop on a short line at an ice cream parlor. By now the sun was almost completely set, and a chill was settling into the air. He was worried about your frail mortal form becoming too cold after consuming the frozen treat. Voicing his concerns elicited, what he considered, an extremely cute scoff from you.

“I happen to like things that run on the cool side,” you said with a little shrug, stepping up to place your order.

Loki couldn’t help but wonder if there was some hidden meaning behind your words, especially considering a frost giant was your chosen companion for this evening. He didn’t have much time to ruminate on this, however, since he had to place his order. Surprisingly, before he could get the words out, you spoke for him. Not only that, you knew his favorite flavors: chocolate and strawberry. Realizing how much attention that meant you paid to him, he felt his cheeks flush. He wanted to say something, but you were very pointedly looking away from him. He supposed you might not have thought before speaking and were now embarrassed because of it.

You made your way out of the store after polishing off your ice cream, once again grabbing Loki’s hand as not to lose him in the crowded streets. He was enjoying the easy conversation that you shared when suddenly you squealed in delight and pulled him once again to chase your latest desire.

“Look, Loki!” you exclaimed, practically jumping up and down in excitement. “Carriage rides! I’ve always wanted to go on one.”

“Well, I see no reason to deny such a pretty lady her wish.”

Though he was a perfect picture of nonchalance and suave on the outside, his insides were a jumbled mess. As he paid the driver and helped you into the carriage, Loki thanked the Norns for this excellent opportunity to confess. For once, it seemed that the universe was actually on his side. As the horse trotted along the road, you began to shiver, and, giving you his best “I told you so” look, Loki conjured up a blanket for you. It wasn’t his intention to share it, but you insisted. Bundled up under the fleecy material, you took in the sights of the city. Loki, however, basked in the sight of you and all your radiant beauty, bursting forth from your bright smile and infectious energy.

“What is it?” you questioned, noticing how he was observing you. “Is there something in my teeth?”

Your hand flew up to cover your mouth, flustered at the possibility. Loki gently grabbed it and pulled it down, considering his next words carefully.

“No, my angel, there is not.” He took a steadying breath before continuing, “I do, however, have a confession to make.”

“Oh?” you remarked, the most adorable look of befuddlement adorning your face. “Ok, I’m listening.”

“Well, you see,” he began, second-guessing his decision to reveal himself, but the eager expression you wore egged him on. “I am the one who has been leaving you presents.”

“Wait, wait, wait. So you’re my secret admirer?”

Loki bit his lip, trying to assess the emotions hidden in your voice. It was something that, in any other circumstance, he was exceedingly good at. His own complex feelings, however, were preventing him from coming to an accurate conclusion at the moment.

“Yes. I am.” Before you could say anything else, he plowed on in an unusual mix of confidence and concern. “When we were speaking earlier, you admitted that, so long as you didn’t hate the person, you would go on a date with them. And I was hoping you would. Settle for me, that is.”

You blinked a few times, doing your best to process everything he just said. Loki waited with bated breath for your reply. As the seconds ticked on, he considered launching into another rambled explanation but thought better of it. It took all his energy to remain composed as you began shaking your head.

“I’m afraid that, no, Loki. I will not be settling for you, as you put it.”

“I understand,” he said, once again resigned to the fact that you would never love him. He couldn’t believe how foolish he’d been to think for even a second that you could.

“Actually, I don’t think that you do,” you continued as he quirked an eyebrow, doing his best to keep that glimmer of hope from invading his heart again. “You see, I won’t be settling because I was hoping that it would be you all along.”

For what was possibly the first time ever, the trickster god was at a loss for words. “I must admit, I am not quite sure what to say.”

“Then shut up and kiss me already.”

It was all the encouragement he needed before bringing his lips to meet yours. You grabbed his shirt and brought him even closer to you, deepening the kiss. Loki tried to memorize every detail of this moment, terrified that you’d suddenly change your mind. He was pretty sure that he could get drunk on the taste of your lips. Your fingers tangled in his raven locks as your tongue darted in his mouth and started exploring. Where he was afraid to go too fast and scare you off, you were sure of what you wanted and went for it. It encouraged him to move his hands down to your waist and slip them under your shirt.

All too soon, you had to break for air, but Loki wasn’t yet ready for his lips to still. He placed sloppy kisses along your neck as you panted, still trying to catch your breath from the passionate kiss. He managed to pull himself away as the carriage came to a stop, suddenly remembering where he was.

“So, about that date?” he ventured, now brimming with aplomb.

“Yes, Loki,” you laughed. “I would love to go on a date with you. Oh, and by the way, that kiss was the best gift yet.”

He looked shyly away as you snuggled up next to him under the blanket. After finishing the carriage ride, Loki walked arm in arm with you back home. You placed a hand on his shoulder, stopping him before you walked in the doors.

“So, do you want to break it to the rest of the team that their guesses were wrong, or should I?” you playfully asked.

The two of you shared a laugh as you walked into the Tower, hearts full and lips red from kissing.

“Whatever you want, dearest,” Loki replied, placing a gentle, loving kiss to your head. “Whatever you want.”

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thisissirius · 4 years ago

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because 4x01 happened and i had feelings about it. the therapy stuff is taken directly from my own counselling sessions. i might not have gone through a tsunami and a truck bombing, but i’ve seen some shit lol. ANYWAY. i hope y’all like this.

for @capseycartwright who always deserves the best buck content and quality sassy eddie <3

need help (but can you help me? [ao3 link] buck, buck/eddie, hurt/comfort, therapy

Eddie leaned against the doorjamb to his bathroom, arms folded across his chest. “I hear you’re cheating on me with a Covid crush?”

Buck snorted. “You’ve been talking to Chim.”

“More like had to listen to him,” Eddie corrected. He met Buck’s eyes through the mirror.

“You know I would never—”

“I know, Buck,” Eddie said quickly. He straightened up, came to stand next to Buck at the basin. Buck looked to the left, lips quirking up. Before he could say anything, Eddie leaned in, resting his head on Buck’s shoulder, their eyes meeting in the mirror again. “I trust you.”

Fingers curling around the edge of the basin, Buck sighed. “I should just tell them.”

Eddie kissed Buck’s neck. “You don’t owe anybody anything.”

Silence lapsed between them.

“When you’re ready to tell people, you will,” Eddie said, sliding a hand up Buck’s back, scratching through his hair and then pulled back. “Breakfast in half an hour. Chris is already up.”

“Fuck you,” Buck said with a laugh.

Eddie blew him a kiss and tapped the doorframe on his way out.

_________

Buck wasn’t keeping it a secret deliberately.

Quarantine was difficult. It wasn’t as bad for him as it was for a lot of people given that he was still able to work, but he hadn’t been alone since the quarantine had started. It had started to get too much for him to handle around the second month.

“I used to think I was lonely,” he said, leaning on his desk.

Lisa nodded, sitting back in her chair. “And now?”

“I havent been for a while,” he said. “But not because of quarantine. That’s just made me realize I love my workmates but living with them has been difficult.”

“You’re ready for them to go home.”

Buck huffed a short laugh. “Yeah, I am. Well. I’m sad Eddie’s gone, but I know why he had to.”

Lisa’s face remained impassive. It was one of the reasons Buck liked her. “Do you miss him?”

Missed was an understatement. Though Hen and Eddie had gone home and Buck had been glad to have his apartment mostly to himself, that didn’t stop him missing Eddie like a phantom limb. It had been difficult without Chris around, moreso for Eddie, but Buck had missed him too. That would change now, as long as they were careful and took precautions, and Buck wanted to go back to having Eddie and Chris to himself—without Chm around. “I just wish Chim would leave.”

“Hmm,” Lisa said.

“Not because I’m sick of him,” Buck said. “It’s just hard when he’s here. I feel like I can’t be myself.”

Lisa stared at him. “You can with Eddie?”

“Yeah,” Buck said. “I can.”

“Then start with that,” Lisa said. “Keeping it a secret is taxing on you, and I can imagine on Eddie, but if the two of you have decided it works for you, then only you get to decide when you tell your friends and family.”

“I know.” Buck blew out a slow breath. “Thanks, Lisa.”

“It’s what I’m here for, Buck,” she said with a smile. “However, that’s the end of the session and I have to go. If you need anything, text me, alright?”

Buck nodded, thumb hovering over the mousepad. “I will. Thanks again.”

The sign off was always awkward over Zoom, but Buck hadn’t dealt well with face to face sessions. When he closed his laptop, he sat back in his chair, hearing Maddie’s laugh through the speakers of Chim’s laptop. Great. Rolling his eyes, Buck cast a quick eye at the clock. Not long and they had to be at work.

_________

“Well,” Eddie said. “At least it’s not a tsunami.”

Buck gave him a look. “Are you kidding me?”

Eddie was smiling, the dick, and Buck elbowed him. “Ow,” he said through a laugh. Sobering quickly, he reached out, squeezed Buck’s arm as best he was able in their gear. “It’ll be alright.”

“I can’t do it again, Eddie.”

Eddie turned. “Buck, look at me.”

Buck winced but did as asked. They didn’t have long before they’d be on the roof.

“I’ve got you, hear me? No matter what, you’re not on your own this time.”

I wasn’t before, Buck didn’t say. “Okay.”

“You hearing me?”

“Yes, Eddie, I got you.”

Eddie smirked. “Don’t sass me, Buckley.”

“I’ll do whatever Ilike,” Buck said mulishly, but he couldn’t stop the smile from forming. “Thanks, Eddie.”

“Anytime,” Eddie said, dropping his voice. “Now let’s get this done, alright?”

_____________________

Buck massaged his temples. “It was a disaster. Literally.”

“It was,” Lisa agreed.

“With everything that went on, it reminded me of the tsunami.”

Lisa nodded sympathetically. “That must have been difficult.”

It took Buck a minute to find his voice. “I had a job to do this time as well and I didn’t have Chris to look out for.” When he realised Lisa looked ready to speak, Buck powered on. “Not that I resented looking out for Chris. I know—you know how I feel about that and that I’ll probably always regret it, but I had Eddie this time. I had—a job and someone to help me.”

“Okay,” Lisa said. It wasn’t a dismissal, and Buck nodded. “I know how much trust you have in Eddie, Buck. I just wonder how much you have in yourself.”

“What do you mean?”

“We’ve talked about the truck bombing, the tsunami. We’ve talked about the blood clots and the lawsuit,” and Buck winces at the reminder, “and throughout all of that you mention everything you’ve done wrong.”

Buck frowned. “Yeah?”

“What about the things you did right?”

There was a long silence.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“I want you to do something for me, okay?”

Buck waited for her to finish, not knowing how to answer.

“Before you next call me, I want you to write down five things you’ve done right in the time you’ve been working. I would prefer it to be related to those incidents we discussed, but I will take other things as well.”

“I—” Buck started.

“If you can’t, it’s okay. I just want you to try.”

“Okay,” Buck said eventually. “I’ll try.”

_____________________

Maddie narrowed her eyes. “So when do I get hear about it?”

“Never,” Buck said, not having to ask what she meant. “It’s private, Mads.”

“Even from me?” Maddie sounded hurt. Buck hated himself just a little but he was taking to heart the things Lisa told him; he and Eddie were the only ones with the right to tell people that they were in a relationship, nobody else could decide for them.

Reaching out, he touched the screen, wishing he could hold her hand. “It’s not what you think, I promise you that. When I’m ready to tell you, I will.”

There was a long pause, but Maddie shut off the call and she didn’t look annoyed. “Okay. I am here if you need me.”

“I know,” Buck said. He missed his sister terribly, but was determined to make Chim leave before he met her himself. . “I wish I could convince Chim to come home.”

Maddie’s face shifted. She looked sad and Buck wished he could change that too. “I’m just as scared as he is. I shouldn’t be doing this alone.”

“Want me to kick his ass?”

Shaking her head, Maddie at least let out a little laugh, so Buck counted it as a win. “No.”

“Maybe this,” Buck said, waving a hand behind him to encompass everything that had happened. “Will shake him up. He hasn’t come home yet.”

“He hasn’t?” Maddie frowned. “Didn’t he finish work with you?”

“I think Hen took him out,” Buck said. “Maybe she’s doing the yelling for you.”

There was the trace of a smile on her face. “I just want him want this as much as I do.”

“Hey,”Buck said, leaning forward. “If there’s one thing I do know about Chim right now, it’s that he’s desperate to be a dad with you, Mads. He’s been going through all my parenting books while we’ve been in lockdown.”

Maddie paused. “Why do you have parenting books?”

“For Chris,” Buck said, rolling his eyes. “Stop it. They were so i could help Eddie.”

“Oh,” Maddie said, and there was the sister he knew and loved so much. “If it’s for Eddie.”

“I’m going now,” Buck said, waving a hand. “Go do whatever it is you and Albert do.”

Maddie laughed and cut off the call.

___________________

“It’s my therapist,” Buck said.

Eddie looked up from cooking dinner. “What?”

“The person I’m calling.”

Eddie didn’t say anything for a long time. Buck worried it was because he was mad, but realised he was just turning off the burner. “Come here.”

Buck went, standing awkwardly next to Eddie, until Eddie reached up, wrapping his arms around Buck’s shoulders. Like a string had been cut, Buck fell against him, sorry when Eddie had to adjust his stance or send them toppling. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“You didn’t have to,” Eddie assured him, ghosting a kiss across his head. “I’m proud of you.”

“For seeing a therapist?” Buck scoffed.

Eddie pulled back, touching a hand to Buck’s face. “For telling me. I know it’s not an easy thing to do.”

Buck’s breathing was shaky, he could hear it, and he wanted to look anywhere but at Eddie’s face, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away. “I wanted to make everything less messed up.”

“You’re not messed up,” Eddie snapped, then sighed. “I’m sorry. You might feel that way, but I don’t see messed up.”

“What do you see?”

“I see the man I love hurting and struggling.”

The words came out so easily that Buck was almost physically struck by them. “Eddie.”

“I love you,” Eddie said quietly. Buck knew what a gift it was to be loved by someone like Eddie. “I’m behind you no matter what.”

“I know,” Buck said, just as quiet. “I love you too. I just needed—quarantine got to me and I know it did to you—”

“You’re allowed to feel things too. It’s not a competition.”

Buck shrugged. “I know you had Chris.”

“And you had Maddie and me.”

“You were there.”

Eddie nodded, but made a face. “Not in the way we both wanted. It killed me not to be able to touch you or hold you in the way I’m used to.”

“Same.” Buck leaned in, pressed a soft kiss to Eddie’s mouth. “We’re together now.”

“Yeah, we are,” Eddie said, the smile on his face as brilliant as Buck felt. “Come on. Dinner’ll be ready soon and then you can challenge Chris to a lego battle.”

Buck snorted. “I’ll lose. I always do.”

“The joy of being a father,” Eddie said.

Again, Buck was struck by the words, and thought of Maddie. “I am, huh?”

Turning back to the stove, Eddie looked over his shoulder. “You will be.”

It sounded like a hell of a promise.

The next time Buck spoke to Lisa, he was sure he would have those five things she wanted. But if he didn’t, he could talk about Eddie. About Chris, his family, the future. He had something to look forward to and that made everything look brighter.

#buddie fic #buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911 #fic by me #otp: i forgive you #911 spoilers

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porgthespacepenguin · 3 years ago

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Mini-meta about S5 Buddie

Since I am now fully in Buddie hell, I have been thinking about the future of A*a/Eddie and Buck/Taylor, and what those two relationships ending may mean for S5.

Eddie/A*a

Better meta writers than I (and the whole fandom, really) have discussed the topic to death so I won’t go into too much detail. I don’t actually dislike A*a; she’s not the monster some fics make her out to be. But it’s become patently obvious that Eddie/A*a cannot be endgame. Here’s why.

Endgame couples:

don’t get together in a jinx/bad luck episode.

don’t have “nice” horrible dates.

don’t get interrupted as they are about to kiss. In a will-they-wont-they scenario, to tease the audience, sure. But not as an established couple.

don’t make the character’s kid run away from home.

Don’t have the LI fade to the background when their other half is in mortal danger.

And then there are the problems specific to A*a herself:

She calls Eddie Edmundo. Now that’s an interesting writing choice in a show where “finding out who you truly are” is a major theme. Whoever she’s dating, isn’t who Eddie really is.

She has (at best) ableist tendencies. The show takes a dim view of that, and she was framed as the bad guy in the skateboard episode.

She’s paradoxically too perfect on paper: she’s a young, pretty, female latina school teacher, practically checking all the boxes of what Eddie thinks he needs. There’s no narrative growth to be found here.

Carla does not find her right for Eddie, or at the very least, doubts that she is what Eddie truly wants/needs. Final nail in the coffin, right there.

Buck/Taylor

As obvious as it is that Eddie and A*a are doomed to failure, I think it's equally clear that Buck and Taylor won’t last.

Why? Because Taylor kept Buck at arms’ length all through season 4, effectively “friendzoning'' him (though I dislike the term) -- until he put himself at risk. Then and only then, did she kiss him.

She only wanted Buck once she got scared for him.

Their relationship reinforces Buck's certainty that he is only worthy of love and attention when he puts himself in danger and/or gets hurt. If that's not a callback to Buck Begins and his childhood self-harm, I don't know what is.

Plus, Taylor ran away after kissing Buck, and expected him to go after her. Which, again, is a callback to Buck’s pattern of always chasing after people and being left behind (Abby, anyone?).

So while in early S5 we may see some initial regression as they get together for a while, narratively, Buck has to keep growing. He has to leave behind his old self-destructive, self-sacrificing patterns. And the writers have already established right off the bat that he’s not going to do this with Taylor.

So what’s next?

Let’s imagine the writers decide not to make Buddie canon, and just keep them purely platonic BFFs.

They can either leave the boys single forever (cruel and hard to justify when both really want to find love), or they have to introduce not one, but two new characters as love interests.

Considering they just brought back A*a and Taylor as a LIs this season, that makes very little sense. Why waste precious screen time on those relationships in S4 if 1) they’re not meant to last, 2) they’re not meant to bring Eddie/Buck together eventually?

But let’s go past that and assume both new LIs have chemistry with Eddie/Buck (always a coin toss, honestly), and get enough screen time to actually develop their relationships. Sounds good, right? Except, there’s still a gigantic problem:

There’s no room left for them.

The writers have consistently shown us how important Buck is to Chris. In S4, we saw how scared Chris was of being left behind by the people he loves. Pushing Buck aside to make room for a random new LI would be cruel and make no narrative sense.

Worse, we know Eddie made Buck Chris’ legal guardian in his will a year ago. He’s not going to change his mind in S5. Should anything happen to him, Eddie clearly doesn’t plan on leaving his kid with a distant friend or relative. So we know Buck’s role in Chris’ life is likely to increase, not diminish. At this point, Buck is essentially Chris’ godfather/co-parent and Eddie is likely to want Buck to spend even more time with Chris to deepen their bond.

What about Eddie himself? Well, if we had learned about the will without him ever being in mortal danger this season, I honestly would have been scared the writers planned to kill him off. But he did almost die, so that ship has clearly sailed. If they wanted to get rid of him, for whatever reason, they had the perfect opportunity to kill him and get a tear-jerker season finale out of it. Eddie clearly isn’t going anywhere either.

So. What we have in S5 is two adult men co-parenting a child for the foreseeable future.

Now ask yourself this: what woman in her right mind would want to come not only 2nd (after Chris, which is normal but already not easy) but 3rd (after Eddie/Buck) in a serious relationship? None. At least, not long term.

So the only logical way forward, narratively-speaking, is a romantic relationship between Buck and Eddie.

#buddie #buddie meta #911 season 5 speculation

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diazboys · 4 years ago

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i’ll be holding on to you | 1.3k words | buddie | domestic, established relationship | ao3

written for Eddie Diaz Week 2021 | Day 1 - “I have no idea what I’m doing” + fatherhood

“You know, for a former soldier, you’re really bad at packing.”

Eddie doesn’t even bother to look up from the mess in front of him. Even without looking, he knows exactly what Buck’s face looks like - the corner of his lips curling up into a mocking smile, one brow raised slightly as he leans against the doorframe and watches Eddie.

“Shut up, Buck,” Eddie mumbles half-heartedly.

It’s not packing that he struggles with right now. If needed, he can pack a bag in less than 10 minutes with minimal chance of wrinkles or running out of space to stuff one more shirt. But that’s not the point. Christopher insisted that he wants to at least be a part of packing for the trip, so Eddie won’t do it without him. Eddie just wanted to prepare some things before he goes to pick Chris up. Make sure that no favourite shirts are left behind in the laundry or no sock is missing its pair. Somehow, Eddie ended up on the floor in his son’s bedroom with the contents of Chris’ entire closet spread out before him on the floor.

According to Buck, he’s been sitting like this for almost an hour.

Currently, Eddie clutches in his hands a red T-shirt with some cartoon characters he doesn’t even know the names of. What he does know is the fact that Christopher has grown out of that one at least a few years ago and there’s no reason for this shirt to even be in the closet.

“I have no idea what I’m doing,” Eddie says with a heavy sigh, finally looking at Buck.

There’s a heavy feeling in his stomach and at least some of it must show on Eddie’s face, because Buck doesn’t even try to make fun of him. Instead, his whole face softens and he pushes himself off the doorframe.

“I figured,” Buck says as he takes a few steps towards Eddie. “You look a bit… troubled.”

Eddie sends Buck an unimpressed look and the other man only laughs in response. A moment later a shoulder is pressing against Eddie’s as Buck sits down on the floor next to him. They’re quiet for a moment. Though, even the solid presence by Eddie’s side is enough to soothe his nerves slightly. He doesn’t even realise he’s still gripping the shirt until Buck reaches down and gently frees the material from his hands. It’s replaced by warm fingers, entwining with Eddie’s.

“I don’t want him to go,” Eddie says and he probably should feel embarrassed by how weak he sounds.

If it was anyone else sitting beside him, he would be. But it's Buck. Eddie knows that he'll understand and he won't judge and he'll still love Eddie even if he's weak. So he lets himself be just that for a moment. The laugh that escapes his mouth is a bit watery but he continues.

“I know it’s just two weeks and he’ll be taken care of. He really wants this, but— God, I don’t want him to go to that stupid camp.”

“Me neither. I will miss him like crazy and I can only imagine how it’d feel for you,” Buck says. His thumb is rubbing the back of Eddie’s hand in a calming gesture. “But it’s going to be OK.”

“Weren’t you the one who told me this camp was a stupid idea?” Eddie asks, looking up at Buck with a raised eyebrow. "What happened with that?"

Buck chuckles before he answers. "That's called being an adult and making sure to take into consideration all the factors instead of just focusing on your own feelings. You should try that sometimes," Eddie rolls his eyes at him and Buck adds, his voice turning softer, reassuring. "You know it's good for him. He’ll make new friends, he’ll have fun. And then he’ll be back with you soon."

Eddie nods automatically. All of this sounds reasonable and true but the heavy feeling is still lurking in his chest, making it harder to breathe. “I know. I know you’re right but— It’s really hard to let him out of my sight for too long. I’ve already spent so much time away—”

Before he can even finish, Buck’s hand goes around his shoulders, tugging Eddie closer and placing a kiss on his temple. “Don’t do this again. You’re a wonderful dad and Christopher knows that. Although he might change his mind if he sees the current state of his bedroom.”

Eddie lets out a small laugh and shoves at Buck’s side. It doesn’t really work, considering how close they’re sitting, so he ends up pressing further into Buck’s arms and their welcoming warmth. It’s good enough.

“We’re going to let Christopher have fun at the camp,” Buck starts, leaning back just enough so he can look at Eddie properly, “and we’ll hate it as much as we want once he’s gone. Deal?”

“Deal,” Eddie agrees, finally managing to curl his lips into a proper smile.

His heart still feels heavy but at least now he knows he doesn’t have to carry that weight on his own. It's a comforting thought.

Eddie turns his head to press a short kiss to Buck’s lips. When Buck smiles, Eddie can feel it pressing against his skin.

“Besides,” Buck says, not trying to put any distance between them. “I’ll try my best to keep you occupied for those two weeks so you won’t have much time to worry.”

With one last kiss, Eddie finally leans back and shakes his head at the smirk on Buck’s face.

“I appreciate it, but I’d rather not discuss the ways you’re going to keep me occupied while we’re in our kid’s bedroom, please,” Eddie says.

Hearing that, Buck beams, his eyes glowing with so much love and joy that he's barely able to contain it. It’s hardly the first time Eddie implied that Buck is as much of a parent as he is, but it still seems to catch Buck off guard. Eddie doesn’t mind. Not if it means that he gets to see the pure happiness lighting up Buck’s face every time he says that.

“I meant kicking your ass at Mario Kart, obviously. I don’t know what you’ve been thinking about.” Buck grins and then kisses Eddie once more before getting up. He pulls Eddie up from the floor and gestures to the mess. “Come on, one step at a time. Let’s deal with all this and then go get Christopher. We can still spoil him before Monday comes. Maybe he’ll change his mind and decide to stay with us after all.”

“I mean, I wouldn’t. Two weeks without your stupid face sounds like a dream, sometimes,” Eddie jokes.

In response, Buck shoves at him hard enough that Eddie stumbles and falls onto Christopher’s bed. He laughs and takes a moment to just lay there. His eyes track the glow-in-the-dark stars Buck helped Chris stick to the ceiling. Then he glances down, watching Buck fold some Christmas sweaters that Eddie apparently dragged out of the closet during his little meltdown. Eddie takes a deep breath and gets up to help. One step at a time.

The anxiety is still tugging at his heart and Eddie doubts it'll stop before Christopher is safely back home. But he feels lighter. As if every word, every worry he shared with Buck lifted some weight from his chest. His feelings are out there now, safe in Buck's hands instead of crushing Eddie, slowly but surely.

They can do this.

#eddiediazweek2021 #eddieweek2021 #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie fic #buddie #my writing

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detectivecarlosreyes · 4 years ago

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In Case of Emergency (Ch 8/10)

Ao3 | 2.2/15.6k | Buddie | Status: Incomplete

Prev. Chapter | Next Chapter

Chapter 8: 30 feet of mud between you and me Both Buck and Eddie struggle with the concept of sleep after Eddie gets taken to the hospital and Buck gets through the rest of the shift wondering what the rest of the team thought of reaction to Eddie's accidental burial. Set mid-Eddie Begins- 3x15, after Eddie's self-rescue and before Chris's show and tell.

Retrospectively, Buck knew he had let his emotions get the best of him. Losing his best friend, his partner, the man he decidedly loves to the depths of the earth to a place that he couldn’t easily follow was unlike anything that he ever felt, and it sent him in a spiral of despair that could not be easily explained to the others.

And it wasn’t just the fact that Eddie was trapped under 30 feet of mud with no certain rescue that sat heavily on his chest, it was his immediate thought afterward - what am I going to tell Chris? - that really had him hell-bent in believing that despite the odds, Eddie was somehow still okay because he just couldn’t fathom any alternative that didn’t result in Chris getting to see his father again.

And then Eddie was just there, having resurfaced in a way that was so typically Eddie that Buck couldn’t feel anything other than joy and relief. He reveled in just being able to hold Eddie’s hand even for the short period it took to get him to an ambulance.

Buck was ready to get out of there as soon as he could because all his thoughts were consumed by Eddie and the gravity of that situation, of the fact that he’d almost lost him for good. The need to see him and hold him to be sure his self-rescue wasn’t a figment of his imagination was near overwhelming, thankfully when they returned to the station, they were mercifully free of calls for the next few hours allowing them time to get warm and clean after being out in that torrential rainfall, but that didn’t mean he was able to get even a wink of shut-eye.

And with the mental exhaustion of being at the tail end of a 24-hr shift, there was little energy for speculative conversation to which Buck was secretly grateful because at least the tiredness gave him a buffer from the potential consequence of that call resulting in Cap calling him into his office to discuss interpersonal relationships and ask the questions that could very well be on everyone’s mind since witnessing his less than subtle emotional outbursts, something he assumed based on the way they looked at him.

Not that it would be a bad thing seeing as neither he nor Eddie were actively trying to keep it a secret anymore, not since Christmas really, but it was one thing for people to guess and speculate, and another thing entirely him to announce and confirm it without his better half present and consenting to share such news.

Much to his relief, the end of their shift came around soon enough, and having had a message relayed from Eddie through the hospital reminding him that Chris would need to be picked up from Pepa’s for school, a job he usually reserved himself but seeing as he was out of commission the job defaulted to Buck, meaning he had to leave as soon as humanely possible to keep to the schedule.

It was enough for Chim and Hen to question his eagerness to leave, seeing as he was usually the one of the last out of the station.

“What got you in a rush this morning?” asked Hen as he collected both his and Eddie’s bags, slinging them over his shoulders, “got somewhere to be or something?”

He looked at his watch and said distractedly without missing a beat as he added up time it would take to get from the station to Pepa’s and then to the school, “Actually yeah, I need to pick Christopher up for school seeing as Eddie is still at the hospital, and if I’m going to make it, I really need to leave right now. I’ll see you guys later.”

And promptly left with a wave, leaving Hen and Chim to share a long questioning look before staring after him, only now noticing that he was in fact not just carrying his own bag.

** ** ** ** ** ** ** **

Eddie was glad to finally be allowed to go home having been given the all-clear some 8 hours later.

The hours had passed slowly for him, lying in the hospital bed, waiting for his observation period to be over. It was excruciating, especially knowing that he could not for the life of him get any measure of rest despite being told by the hospital staff that was exactly what he should be doing.

It was something that he was unable to do, not when his mind was replaying what happened in that tunnel over and over again feeling as though he’d just barely cheated death, which in reality he had. He shouldn’t have survived being trapped down there, probably wouldn’t have it not for the family that he created for himself, with the fire station, with Buck, with Buck and Christopher.

Christopher.

Tears had sprung to his eyes at the thought of his son, knowing that he had been so close to not being able to return to him and that Chris could have very nearly lost both parents in the space of a year. It was a sobering thought, one that plagued him in the early hours of the morning while most of the hospital still slept.

And thinking about it all had just left him restless, itching to hold his son in his arms to remind himself that he actually did make it out and Chris still had a father to come home to. It was those thoughts as well that lead to remind him that he was supposed to be taking him to school and ended up convincing one of the nurses to call Buck to take his place for the morning, something he knew Buck would do without hesitation.

Speaking of Buck; the man showed up after dropping Chris off with an inexplicable warmth to him greeting him with a soft “hey” before insisting that he hang around until he was discharged despite looking just as exhausted as he felt, as if he had just as little sleep as himself.

Much to his displeasure, his body still betrayed him still showing signs of exhaustion despite being given a clean bill of health. And Buck walked closely beside his tired frame to the door carrying both of their bags and opened the door using his own key looking distinctly at home in doing so, a stark difference to the first time all those months ago.

With a sigh he sat on the couch, eyelids drooping while Buck left him for the kitchen stating he should at least have a shower while he made them some tea before getting some rest. Rest: there was that word again. Something Eddie was slowly beginning to hate because every time he closed his eyes he was back in that hole, trapped and alone. It was enough to keep the chill in his bones.

Reluctantly, he trudged to the bathroom and turned the shower on as hot as he could stand, and gave himself a quick but thorough wash not wanting to be surrounded by water for longer than necessary, unwilling to let the sensation of it get the best of him.

Soon after, he returned to the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed, smoothing out the pillow and finding himself unable to lay down, terrified that the moment he closed his eyes he would just keep reliving that moment when he realised he was alone, no connection to the outside world, no way of knowing that they knew he was still alive.

“I made you some camomile tea, thought it might help,” Buck announced as he joined him in the bedroom, setting the tea beside him on the bedside table, before turning and standing between his legs, cupping his cheek with one hand and pressed a kiss to his forehead. Eddie couldn’t help but lean into it with his eyes closed, relishing in the contact.

It was over too soon, and he mourned the loss of contact until he heard the sound of clothes rustling and opened his eyes to see Buck changing into his sleepwear. He watched over his shoulder as Buck climbed onto the bed behind him and felt his heart speeding up at the prospect of the simple act of sleeping.

“Eds?”

“I can’t close my eyes, Buck.” He admitted under his breath unable to move from his spot, “I still feel cold even though I know that I’m not and I’m afraid if I close my eyes, I’ll open them again and I’ll be back there.”

He felt Buck’s weight shifting on the bed before his warm body pressed up against his back, a firm but gentle hand placed on his waist, and Buck’s lips lightly touched the junction between neck and shoulder.

“If it makes you feel any better, I haven’t been able to sleep either,” Buck murmured against his shirt, “Let me be here, with you- for you. I’ll keep you warm.”

He could feel the tension melt from his shoulders, not realising that he had been holding any in the first place and allowed Buck to drag him with him to lie down. Almost instantly he relaxed into the comfort of Buck’s arms, feeling the heat the man radiated seep into his core, warming him up in the specific way that he had been sorely needing.

And they just lay there in the still partially lit room, finding an easy rhythm in their breaths. He was close to sleep before he started with a sharp intake of breath, his brain reminding him of one important thought, “What about Chris? We need to pick him up from school.”

Buck shushed and lazily stroked a hand in his hair, “Don’t worry, I’ve got an alarm that’s hours from now to get us up before pick up, and then we can cuddle him on the couch for as long as you want, but right now we both need to sleep.”

That was something that he loved about Buck. His innate sense of knowing and understanding him as much as he knew and understood himself. He settled back down, nestled in Buck’s arms, and reflexively breathed out the words neither of them has said out of fear of saying it too soon despite knowing how the other felt.

“I love you.”

Buck’s arms gently tightened around him, pulling him in closer to his chest as he answered softly into his hair, “I love you too, Eddie.”

** ** ** ** ** ** ** **

True to his word Buck’s alarm startled them into consciousness. Much to their relief, sleep had come easily, exhaustion pulling them under swiftly, leaving no room for dreams or memories to wake them.

In no time they were dressed and fed with sandwiches Buck had prepared earlier when he was in the shower and were at pickup waiting for the moment that Eddie had been waiting for since he resurfaced in that pond.

“Daddy!”

After that nothing else mattered, he scooped up his son and held him tight and wouldn’t let him go, even going so far as sitting in the backseat with him on the drive home.

“Bucky said you had to go to the hospital because you got really cold when it was raining last night. Did they help you get warm?”

“That’s right bud, I was very cold and tired because I was helping a little boy, only a couple of years younger than you, get back to his mom.”

“You saved him?”

“He sure did Chris! Your daddy is a hero.” Chimed in Buck from the driver’s seat, and Eddie shared a look with him as Buck mouthed in the reflection of the mirror, our hero.

Soon enough the three of them were cuddled up together under a blanket on the couch with Eddie in the middle and Chris and Buck on either side of him, bellies full of pizza and ice cream, slowly being lulled into a food coma while watching the latest Disney movie that Chris was excited about.

Eddie was content, having the two reasons that helped him make it back alive wedged under each arm, feeling the most at peace than he had ever been in the last 24 hours.

By the time the credits were rolling, Chris was out like a light and he and Buck weren’t that far behind, despite having a solid 5-hour nap earlier. So, they drowsily set about relocating Chris into bed before falling into their own, resuming their earlier position with Eddie curled around Buck’s side head on his chest with Buck’s arms circled around him, securing him in place.

He was nearly lulled to sleep by the sound of Buck’s steady heartbeat when Buck’s voice quietly rumbled in his chest.

“Hey Eddie.”

He hummed in response, not bothering to open his eyes.

“I’m pretty sure the team knows about us now,”

“Is that so?” He asked with an air of levity as he shifted his head.

“I would like to preface it and say that it’s not my fault, I thought I lost you.”

“I guess I can forgive you for that,” He answered before quietly laughing into Buck’s chest, “Really it’s on them for taking so long to notice anyway, its not like we’ve been all that subtle at recent gatherings.”

Buck softly snorted at that, “Yeah, that’s true.”

“We can figure it out in the morning when we’re awake to remember it.” He suggested with a deep yawn, barely able to stay conscious.

He barely got a whispered okay before they were both fast asleep in another peaceful slumber.

#jess writes #my fic #911 fic #buddie fic #eddie diaz #evan buckley #911 on fox #buddie #userkourt #userkimmy #userpauline #userjillian #eddiesdiaz #gracieli #useraninha #javachik #tuserjamie #buddie4ever20

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jaestay · 4 years ago

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A study session with Mr. Bang and Mr. Lee!

Pairing: Bang Chan x Y/N and Felix x Y/N

Genre: Smut

Content/Warning: Teacher-student relation, female reader, age gap (not mentioned), threesome, oral (f, m), anal, double penetration, unprotected sex, semi public.

Requested: Anon- “Could you do an One shot of English teacher Chan x English teacher Felix x student Who doesn't speak very well English? Smut?”

Word count: 3,3k

You’ve always been a good student.

Acing in everything as usual, except English. Your parent and your teachers didn’t understand the sudden drop of grades, on no other subject other than English.

But you knew exactly what the sudden cause to the drop was. The reason being none other than getting extra private classes from your favorite teacher Mr. Bang Chris and sometime his co-worker Mr. Lee Felix.

Both teachers were good looking, young and single, so it isn’t a surprise that the whole school wanted to sleep with them. But you took the need to next level, as you were determined to sleep with one of them if not with both of them.

You constantly had this crazy fantasy of them both taking you in the library, where the usual tutoring sessions would be. You’d edge yourself almost every night imagining them reading out loud your mistakes and making sure you get every grammatical error you made, as both of their cock were dragging inside you.

You put these thoughts aside the as the final bell rang, shivers of excitement run through you, knowing that it’s time to go to the library and meet your hot English teacher Mr. Bang.

Truth to be told all throughout your school career, you lowest was always English, because it was not your native language and it was always difficult for you to speak because you have a heavy accent. So falling behind wasn’t a difficult task for you. And to everyone’s disappointment, you indeed took a big step back.

You quickly dropped by the toilets to check if everything was in place, you do not want to be out of place for your favorite teacher. You fixed your hair and applied an even coat of your lip balm, which smelled like strawberries, also spraying yourself with your favorite perfume.

Maybe it was the dirty thought you had at class or maybe it was the seducing scent of your perfume that you just sprayed, an idea that today you must have him dawned on you, your heat also getting wetter at the same time. Without missing a beat you started fixing your pleated skirt by pulling it up from the back a bit just to showcase your back thighs more than usual, you also leave two more buttons undone from your button down white shirt, reveling a good portion of cleavage out, for those willing to look.

Feeling contented with the sudden changes, you giddily packed your things up and skipped to the library. You showed your student ID to get in and quickly went into one of the rooms that you always have classes on.

He was already there, and surprisingly with Mr. Lee on his side, discussing some exam questions. They quickly concluded their conversation when they saw you.

“Good evening, Mr. Bang and Mr. Lee, did I interrupt you?” you asked with your heavy accent and smiling, owing to the fact that you were happy to see both of them and to be in the same room with them.

“No, y/n, don’t worry” Mr. Bang smiled back at you.

“Now, quickly get your things so we can start”. Mr. Lee said with urgency. His deep voice echoed through the room, it sent a tingle of sensation through your whole body.

You give them a perplexed look when they both moved to the side of the table leaving a big gap between them. It took some time for you to understand that both of them are going to teach you and they want you to sit in the middle of them.

While looking at them, you observed that the undone buttons didn’t go unnoticed from both of them as both of them kept staring at your chest and not in your eyes like they always do. Feeling confident enough, you turned around, and when you had your back facing them you let your bag fall to the ground. You slowly bent down, to pick up your book and pencil case from inside you bag. You could hear their breath hitch when your shorts inside your skirt came to light, which at the same time revealed the curves of your butt mesmerizingly to them.

Without hesitating, you took your designated seat, in between them. You couldn’t believe that you are really living this. Oh, how often you’d let your hand under your panties thinking about this scenario.

“May we start now?” you asked innocently looking into their eyes, just as you squished in between them, to sit.

“No baby, it’s -shall we start now” both them laughed, you blushed not only at the mistake but at the pet name too, making you more wet and clench around nothing, as you felt the wetness sliding inside your pussy.

“Yeah right, sorry”, you said rubbing the back of your neck from embarrassment, while squeezing you thighs to ease the movements down there.

They start the class like normal, bringing out your past exam paper to pin point your mistake, so you could work on them.

“Are you wearing perfume y/n?” Mr. Lee asked, abruptly, while he took a sniff of you.

“Mmm, lavender” Mr. Bang added from the side of your ear, as he was suddenly close to you.

Take aback from the unpredicted inquiry, not understanding what they are saying well and the closeness, you jerked a bit to the side, then out of nowhere, you felt Mr. Bang’s nose rub against your ear accidentally when he came to take your scent in again, you let out an audible moan at the sensation.

You suddenly opened your eyes and clapped your hand on your mouth as you blushed deep red. You quickly stood up and sat on the table as you stared back at them, who were looking at you with wide eyes. You took a second to look deep inside both of their eyes and you noticed that their pupils were fully blown out, because nothing other than blackness of desire started back at you.

Suddenly you were pushed back until you back hit on the table by Mr. Bang, and you saw Mr. Lee walking away to lock the door, because you heard the tiny click.

After the two men exchanged glances, Mr. Lee came from behind the table and Mr. Bang from the front trapped your small figure in-between them as you struggled to breathe. You took a deep breath as both of pressed their chest against your body.

You tried to push them away, with the little bit satiny left in you. Even though this is exactly what you wanted, you suddenly felt little uncertain.

But when you felt Mr. Bang’s lips on your and Mr. Lee’s lips on the back of your neck, you immediately gave in. You moaned as your hands went to grab their hair to push them in deep. His kiss is full of desire, it’s like he knew what he came for precise and taking the enough measurement to make you more turned on and make you needier.

When you ran out of breath you tired pull Mr. Bang away, just as you took a deep breath, Mr. Lee came in, with his open mouth over yours, you took his scent in, and bucking your hips as you felt his sloppy kiss leave a trail of saliva on your chin. You moaned into Mr. Lee’s mouth when you felt Mr. Bang’s mouth on your neck and going down.

“Please” you wailed as you had to push them away to take deep breath as you were getting lightheaded.

“What happened now, princess?” Mr. Bang asked mocking you the same time.

“Yeah come on, we know you want this, you think we didn’t notice the way you stare at us” Mr. Lee announced as they stared at you making you shiver just by looking at them. How did they know your best kept secret? Where you not that secretive? Did your gaze of desire give it away, as he said, and made them aware of your wet dreams? Your questions to your self was bought to en end when Mr. Bang made it more comprehensible for you.

“Or the way your thighs press together, when I speak to you” Mr. Bang declared, licking his lips. Your body really gave away the need of wanting them, because you were too horny whenever you saw them. You stare deep in to Mr. Bang’s eyes, to know if he really meant what he said and if he knew more of your secret.

“Little selfish of you to think that only Chris want to rail you” Mr. Lee broke you from the trance that trapped you in the eyes of Mr. Bang and you look at him apologetically as you were letting him know, he is also in your wet dreams, that were supposed to be secret.

“Nah, I think princess imagines both of us ruining her, don’t you?” His Australian accent heavy, as he nodded his head towards waiting for an answer. You stared at both of them, not knowing what to say, should you humiliate yourself and admit that they are reason you orgasm every night or keep denying them?

“By the way, you okay with this?” Mr. Lee uttered, concern filling his face. Thank god that he broke the tension building between you and Mr. Bang.

“You okay with both of us taking you?” flirty Mr. Bang asked you winking at you.

They left no space for you to think as they reattached themselves on top you. You quickly nodded at them as you push them on to you more. Mr. Bang quickly pulled your shorts down and Mr. Lee ripped your shirt apart and quickly pulling you’re your bra over your head.

You let out a deep moan as your wet pussy hit the air. You lie there legs apart and supporting yourself on the table, as they both look at your hard nipples and your shimmering pussy folds, in awe and mouth agape.

You got shy under their ogling eyes and try to close your legs but that ended nowhere as they immediately pulled it open to keep looking at it. They both got close to your pussy, then Mr. Bang blew at your wet clit and you squeezed your boobs at the sensitivity and letting out a whine.

“Dude, she’s dripping” Mr. Bang states as Mr. Lee comes to the front, so he could sniff your juicy cunt, he groaned at your scent, he cannot wait anymore. Both of their eyes shine back at your shining pussy.

“Damn, princess, all this for us?” Mr. Lee asks you. You have no idea what to say as you had no idea what he meant because you were too flustered from what was happening in front of you.

You mutter a quick “No” since you were confused.

“No?” Both men said in unison, as they let out a laugh. You were really confusing them.

“Tell us baby do you want it or not” Mr. Lee asked you, patience and care dripping his voice.

“Are we not getting our message of wanting to fuck you raw, across?” Mr. Bang urged you, as he couldn’t wait any longer than this.

Your twitch at his words. As they swiftly move and you feel Mr. Bang leave open mouth kisses on your nipple as he bite it down and swirled the sensitive top in with his tongue.

“Mr. Bang” you screamed, your hands were flying to catch him as your other nipple was being pinched and squeezed by his delicate fingers.

“It’s Chris” he corrected you, in the tone he always use to point out your mistakes. You clench around nothing at the use of that tone.

Mr. Lee on the other hand, stated kissing your inner thighs, you grab his hand, with your other hand to stabilize yourself, he quickly moved to kiss your pussy lips, and you moaned his name but he quickly corrected you to only call him “Felix” for the night.

His teeth nibbled your nub and started giving you long licks, inhaling your pussy fold to inside his mouth as he hums from satisfaction. You opened your mouth to let out a inaudible moan, taking advantage of your state Chris moved from sucking your nipples to, quickly unbuckling his belt pushing his pants down and freeing his hard on.

After getting on top of the table, he tapped his cock on your tongue that was hanging out from your open mouth. You opened your eyes and saw his pink tip begging to get inside your mouth, you quickly swallowed his tip and licked it, and suddenly from a confidence boost you decide to take it all of him inside, but you choked as you were inexperienced at this.

He pushed your head back and looked at you, and since you smiled back at him innocently, he pushed his cock back in you, making you take his whole cock inside your mouth. You closed your lips at the end of his dick and your tongue on the inside rubbed against the slit of his tip, making him let out deep, vibrating groans, which made you more wet while, your slick were being swallowed by Felix.

You took quick glances down when you felt Felix’s lips leave your already sore pussy, you watch him as he tapped his dick on to your wet pussy. After smirking at you, he tried to push inside, but because his girth was too much, your hit his chest to stop him, because you were still swallowing up Chris’s cock.

Felix made Chris pull away from your mouth, to make it easier for you, so he pulled you up and made you bend over the table. Your head hit the cold table and you arch your back to Felix. At this position Felix tried again, this time though, a bit by bit but he slipped in, making you see starts by each push but nonetheless, when he bottomed out you motioned that you need some time to get used to it the feeling of his cock stretching you out.

Even though you had experience before, you were completely new to this, imagining how it feels is completely different from having them in front of you, you noted to yourself.

While you were waiting, Chris, understanding that you’d need some time and to not waste any more time on his plans, pushed his fingers deep inside your ass hole, you cried out at the new feeling. Now you need time to get used both of these stretching you out to no end.

Just when he started pushing his second finger and started scissoring you, both you and Felix let out deep moans at the feeling. Because Felix could also feel the other males hand through the sheer walls separating them. The feeling of his fingers inside your one hole and Mr. Lee’s dick on your other made you shed tears from sensitivity. Mr. Bang noticing it kissed your tears away

“You okay honey, do you feel stuffed enough” he mocked you again, you cannot take any more of his teasing as his fingers were plunging inside you.

His words made you squirm without you knowing. You cried more when he pushed third finger inside you. Felix also started moving up and down. The intensity is making you see white as your eyes roll back from the pleasure that was filling you up. Felix moved swiftly inside you. You groaned and moaned as you feel his width filling you so deliciously.

“Fuck, you feel so good inside me” you shout out to Felix

“God, baby y-you too” he kissed your back as Chris pulled away.

“Pull her up” you hear Chris said tell Felix.

He was broken from the trance and while still inside you, he pulled up to his chest, you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist and arched your back so it would be accessible for Chris to enter your anus. Felix felt you clenching around, from excitement and started moaning as he was having hard time not to push his dick in and out of you, but he had to wait for Chris to bottom out, so it wouldn’t be difficult for you.

Chris pushed his dick inside your gaping hole with ease, as his fingers stretched you enough. All of you wait another two minutes to get used to this feeling. The sudden movements from both of them stuffing both of their cock made you wail and scream from pleasure. You spasmed and twitched as both them started fucking you without mercy, from the start. Filling both of your hole not caring about your tears or the fact that you’re squirting.

You on the other hand, squirted and cummed as soon as they both started moving up and down inside of you, you couldn’t control it anymore, it felt too good. At the middle of your session as the vulnerability and sensitivity from both the cock filling you up sent you to overdrive. You scream both of their name and dug your nails deep in Chris’s arms which were holding you up from your hips.

“Did you come princess?” Felix asked you as you where bouncing on their cock, unstoppably.

“Shit, you are clenching so hard” Chris scorned at you, “you squirted so hard too”

“Chris, Felix, o-oh my god, stop, please” you sobbed from hypersensitivity.

Seeing you in these state and the constant clenching around both of their cocks made Felix also edge.

“I’m gonna cum, baby” he moaned and sped up to a speed you didn’t know he could go, as he was thrusting with like there is no tomorrow in to you.

“Inside me, please” you wailed when he squirted his liquid deep inside your walls. Meanwhile the over-stimulation has turned in to pleasure again as you feel his sloppy thrusts. When the sloppy thrusts changed angles and started hitting against the wall which was being filled by Chris. You cry out Felix’s name as you feel the Chris groan against your neck, you knew he was close, so were you.

“I’m gonna finish too, baby girl” he moaned out.

“You too, inside me Chris” you screamed, not caring if you are in library or anywhere, because your climax was dangerously close. You clenched immensely around both of their dick, filling you up as you cum again for the second time, which also sent Chris to end it inside you.

You both pant loudly, as Felix stared at both of you coming down from your high. To thank both of them, you started kissing Felix as he was in front of you. Your lips move delicately, as both of your lips fit like a puzzle piece, like you were made for each other. After the romantic kiss, you turned around and give the same attention Chris who had sweat running down from his forehead. Funny to you, he also fit you just like a puzzle piece. You brush off the feeling of spark you felt when you kissed both of them.

They pulled out, while you whine from over-sensitivity and let you lay down on the ground to clean you up. Before cleaning you up, they took a look at you. You had both their releases coming out and running on your to your thighs, you were sweating and you had dried tear marks all over your red cheeks, but overall you looked so pretty in their eyes as they stared sweetly at you. All of you smile smugly as you knew that this won’t be a one-time thing!

After they started cleaning you up, all of your head snapped to the door as you hear a knock, bringing you back to reality.

“Oh fuck!” Mr. Bang said in surprised,

“Shit, no!” Mr. Lee uttered while looking at both of you, waiting for what’s to come.

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himbo-buckley · 5 years ago

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Sex, Intimacy and Buddie (better known as I have a lot of feelings about this show, some of which are related to the before mentioned topics) - Part 5

Hej alla,

hur cool att du är här! Vad kul!

(Kay, that’s it, all the Swedish I remember from two semesters of not really studying, so it’s probably also wrong, uups?)

(Still passed though.)

You guys! We made it! And please, do not imagine this read to you in a happy voice. I am sobbing. I already miss it!

(Also, if you do imagine how I might sound please consider due to several unforseeable circumstances of student exchanges in my youth I have a very weird mixture of British and American English, which basically translates to sounding like either of those doing a bad impression of the other accent - or you know, Australian.)

I’m really having a hard time finishing this meta because I loved doing it so much and I loved talking to all of ya’ll so much. This is a sad moment. (HEY, what if ya’ll came and visited my askbox and I get to discuss random stuff with you!)

Just a fair warning now, somewhere hidden in the middle: this thing is fucking long! We are talking longer than Season 2, so be warned!

Anyways, in case someone is new:

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4

And some general info:

This meta was supposed to be a lot shorter and only talk about how both Buck and Eddie use sex to distract their respective partners from whatever topic they actually wanted to talk about but since I decided to rewatch the show to make sure I don’t miss any such scenes, it has exploded a bit and taken on more topics

I should also mention that I am a Buddie shipper and while I tried, you will find several references and arguments for the ship in this Meta, not all of which necessarily call for a romantic pairing but just: These two are deeply connected and you cannot look at one without discussing the other and they are each other’s strongest emotional connection.

I should also preface this by saying that the whole of the 118 has some obvious intimacy / commitment issues except Bobby (which is sort of surprising) but *John Mulaney voice* we don’t have time to unpack all of that!

On another note I cuss a little in this Meta because my parents let me listen to TicTacToe as a small child and after that it never stuck that cussing is wrong so, uhm, parental supervision is advised or something

This Meta has FIVE parts. Season 1 and 2 make up one part each, while Season 3, due to something pesky called feelings and the fact that I can’t shut up, has been split in three parts: Part 3 aka Season 3A, which spans 3.01 - 3.10, Part 4 which spans 3.11 - 3.17 and this part which is officially only one episode - but still manages to be just as long. Yay! (Sorry.)

And now for the last time for now: part 5 (also called „You’re a godless, half-witted himbo, Evan Buckley, and I wish I loved you less so I could talk about it more“)

Episode 3.18:

My oh my, this episode.

I loved it but I also … didn’t.

It was way too much and at times felt a little rushed and the pacing was just weird.

I mean I loved the party but did we really need 5 min of it? Did we really need Josh’s storyline and Michael’s so randomly in the middle of the episode? Could we have gotten a longer apology scene? Why the weird phone call?

Let’s talks about all of that! (It’s why you clicked read more, right?)

Ya’ll, I gotta be honest, I am from Europe and I regularly go to places via train and while it’s better than a bus, I can’t see anyone falling in love with that! I am just gonna assume Abby did not go by train in Germany. Or Austria. Or Italy. Listen, I like trains just fine but man, do they not look like what we see here!

But also, as someone who has watched Community, the train lady saying „This isn’t Subway“ in an Episode where the human embodiment of Subway acts is very very funny to me.

I feel like I don’t have to point out how significant the cut from Abby saying „They stopped waiting for me a long time ago“ to Buck and Eddie discussing Chris is. Everyone has talked about it by now. But yes, it registered, as did the fact that Abby is dating a single father - while Buck is apparently basically dating a single father. But, you know, that probably means nothing! *chugs a whole bottle of wine*

The co-parenting was very cute and honestly I feel for Christopher and Carla and the firefam is Buddie does happen because they will try to out-protect each other and it will be glorious and also Chris might never get to leave the nest ever. That poor boy.

Sidenote: We as a fandom have not talked enough about Eddie’s reaction to Bobby yodelling and I think that’s very tragic of us. Because his reaction is the best, all: „Is he - should I - no, you know what, fuck it, Eddie, ignore this, that’s too much, you can not unpack all of this, just move on. Brush it off!“

Just watch his face ya’ll, it’s great! (He will be talking to Frank about this, I know it.)

Sidenote: Also Eddie in 3.15 / 3.15. / 3.17 / 3.18 > any other Eddie, and no, I do not take criticism. That boy has always been fine but the military hair cut or what ever is doing things to me as do his happy eyes and the smiles - my god, the smiles!

It does seem significant though the way the show focused so heavily on Buck’s reaction and - as it had been the case since „Eddie Begins“ - we basically don’t see Eddie without Buck and that’s weird. That feels pointed and important, the fact that after realising, who his family is, Eddie basically never leaves Buck’s side if they are at work.

Also the way Chimney and Bobby look at each other in between, yeah, again, making fun of Christopher’s dads! Like, even if you don’t read this as Buddie, you cannot not read this scene as somewhat confirming the „Buck is Christopher’s other parent“-thing. And I know I answered an ask on Tuesday(?) where I said he wasn’t really but yeah, he is getting there. The whole season spent a lot of time focusing on Buck’s relationship with Christopher and even if it isn’t about Buddie, I still think it will cause trouble in Season 4 if Eddie begins dating again, specifically Chris’ teacher.

I also need to talk about Eddie and control, because like I said in part 4 Eddie needs to learn to let go of Christopher a little which is what we see here happening, specifically through the lens of making Buck even more overprotective than Eddie to really cement the fact in all our minds that Eddie is trying to let his son have some freedom. I am so proud of him, you guys! He just signed up for the worst two weeks of his life, he will be dying on the inside out of concern and Buck will pester him every two seconds about whether or not Chris is fine. This is why these three haven’t been to Disneyland, ya’ll! Eddie wouldn’t be able to handle it without murdering either Buck or himself. I’m sorry.

And speaking of how the episode is cut:

One thing I love about 911 is the way it always makes me consider new character pairings and connections I myself would have never thought of, in the context of this episode: Athena, Josh - and Eddie.

And look, the Athena and Josh thing is daunting enough but you can probably still catch my train of thought, because both are recent victims of assault and the episode shows them dealing with trauma and confronting their attacker, even though in Athena’s case it was just theoretical. But now you’re probably wondering, okay, why Eddie?

Well, for starters, what the episode made me realise, whether on purpose on not through cutting from scene to scene is how many similarities there are between Eddie and Athena, both of them always trying to be in control, both of them more prone to violence / more okay with violence than the others, both soft underneath, both with a tendency to let anger take over, both considered to be extremely capable, both with an intense need for control, both straight talker.

And now I will obviously not pretend that letting your child go to sleep away camp for two weeks is similar too confronting your assailant who beat you up, but still: facing fears and letting go of control vs. finding different ways to regain control is the theme for these three in the episode (or this Season in Eddie’s case) and I like it.

I really like what they did with Athena in general in this episode, because, while I don’t think we will see her as a civilian in Season 4, I am confident they will address her trauma and PTSD - especially if they only do a short time jump of say three months and not jump all the way to January / February which is when it might air if we’re lucky.

And I do think the comparison between her and Josh is very nicely done as both characters did the whole brushing it off / moving forward / I am not fazed by any of it thing, as we as viewers clearly saw what utter bullshit this was.

Which of course connects nicely to Mr. „Brush it off and move on“ who has spent a whole season learning to not just move on but to talk about it. A lesson he might have learned? At least that’s what the episode made me think, from the way he came to Buck / the firefam to talk about Christopher and camp to the way he so clearly tried to get Buck to open up about Abby. Jup, that is some motherforking growth right there!

I also wanna say hi to Brooke Shields and say I hope we see her again, cause her character seemed interesting!

And I do appreciate Athena herself addressing the fact that she messed up a little by not calling for back-up right away. This is not meant in a victim blaming way, I just think Athena is very used to handling everything on her own and not asking for help and it is interesting to see how that changes, now that it has backfired on her once.

And now we are getting into the Abby of it all and if anyone reading this is anti Buddie or severely pro Abby this is the moment to either leave or scroll down some more, because ya’ll I won’t really hold back!

(I think.)

I wanna begin by saying, uhm, Abigail, honey? Can you not read what is written on Eddie’s and everyone else’s helmets? Yes, he is from the 118, it literally says so on like every article of clothing he is wearing, omg!

(Writers, do better, that made an already unlikeable character seem downright stupid.)

Now it is very interesting, that the first person we see Abby interact with directly from the main cast (I’m counting the phone call with Maddie as indirectly) is Eddie who doesn’t know who Abby is but who is close enough to Buck to know the second he sees her who she is. The episode spends just as much time focusing on his reaction to Abby as 3.15 did on Buck’s reaction and tbh that feels … fairly non platonic. Of course we can always go back to „Stuck“ and remember what Hen said about Tatiana but still. That was one scene, here we have several scenes highlighting Eddie’s reaction to Abby and just, what do you want me to do with this, Tim?

I mean, the meeting scene literally goes like this:

Eddie *talking to Abby* > cut to Buck, coming closer > Buck: „Abby?“ > cut to both Abby and *Eddie* > Abby: „Buck?“ while the camera is still on her and Eddie > cut to just Eddie’s face having a realisation > cut to Buck

That is some very extreme focus if we’re being honest.

Also her panic reminds everyone of Buck in 3.15, right? The way she is screaming, disregarding her own safety, all desperate to get to her fiancé. Yeah.

I like how Eddie lets them talk and then steps in when he realises Buck is too shocked and only then rushes off, nearly touching Buck. Too be honest I didn’t realise his hand didn’t make contact until I saw some gifs of the scene.

Also the way Oliver plays this scene? The whole scene is so painful and I love it a lot, his whole delivery is so very painful, from the way he says „We’ll find him.“ to the „Um, what’s his name?“ to the „No. Oh. Don’t worry about it.“ because you can actually see him go through all the emotions from devastation to being so very pissed off and then locking that shit down!

Listen, I know it was teased that Buck had to grapple between being a professional and his personal feelings and I think this episode is him being a professional, because this is Buck and Buck cares so for Buck being a professional means risking his life for some guy on the train, regardless of his promise and who he is engaged to.

Sidenote: This episode really brought home why Eddie is a firefighter and not a paramedic, because his bedside manner is shit. „This is gonna hurt a little“. Way to downplay, dude!

Also, while I do love the idea of Buck getting to be Captain one day, I think this episode shows why he won’t be. Because even when he is being professional and having great ideas Buck still cares too much and is unable to make the hard decisions. Compare it to Eddie, who, yes, does say „If we have to choose“, but also is willing to make the choice. Because sometimes you have to. (And now I’m crying a little and oh my, this is why I do not work in any job that has me make such decisions because I could not imagine living with myself if I did.)

I do think however Buck did good, from the way he talked to Sam being his usual self and all.

I’m also such a fan of smart Buck and him standing up for himself with Bobby because he doesn’t get to do this often enough and because it is important for him as a character to learn to trust his own judgement and not depend so much on Bobby’s approval. So yay, my baby is growing up!

(Also, obviously Bobby’s worry was also about Buck and not just Athena, we’ve had half a season of Bobby doing the most to „protect“ Buck, mostly against his will, so I really like that Buck got to do the rescue his way in the end, because it shows growth on both sides.)

Now, Eddie and his dramatic reaction in this scene, first of all:

I wanna take a moment to remember the fact that Edmundo Diaz, my main man, my love, my absolute ray of grey sunshine, apparently lacks any kind of self-awareness - or he would stop acting all high and mighty around Buck because the second Buck is out of view he like, drops any pre-tense of having critical thinking skills or something akin to self-preservation and does the next thing that enters his bird brain no matter the consequences. So a moment of silence for Hen, Chimney and Bobby and all they had to go through in the 6/7 months between Buck getting crushed by a ladder truck and coming back to work, because Buck? They can at least make fun of. Or tell him: yo, bro, you being stupid!

You can’t do that with Eddie - because when Eddie does stupid he gone nearly die but like in a heroic way where he still ends up saving himself and you have to be impressed. Urgh, the nerve!

So, you know what, how about, Mr. Edmundo Diaz, you do not judge Buck for wanting to save people and risk his own life UNTIL WE HAVE FORGOTTEN ABOUT YOU CUTTING THAT MOTHERFORKING ROPE? Got me? Thanks. (I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed, dude.)

(But then again EVERY MOTHERFORKING CHARACTER ON THIS DAMN SHOW SUFFERS FROM CRAZY STUPID DISEASE and no, I do not take any criticism.)

Also I loved Eddie’s dialog and how clearly the whole thing about the promise slipped out if the way his hands closed are anything to go by (or was he imagining punching some sense either into himself or Buck because in both cases: Call Frank, Eddie!). Anyway the way he just left, like, „I can not deal with ya’ll’s stupidity, I am leaving!“ has me shook! That is the top tear entertainment I expect from my favourite show and I love them for it!

I do love how both Buck and Eddie are in protector mode in this episode, Buck with Sam and Abby and Eddie with Buck, especially because if we’re being honest, which we are (this is a safe space ya’ll), Eddie is the one being far more unprofessional! For his standards, of course.

But this is the closest Eddie has come to showing some form of violence since 3a viewed chronologically (because 3.15 happened mostly in the past) yet Buck is just being is usual too caring self. It’s telling and it’s interesting and I’m just gonna say one thing:

„No one is good when it’s personal.“ - because for Buck with Sam it isn’t really personal (though that won’t hit him until later) but for Eddie it kinda is because he is worried about Buck. (And now I did spell it out! But, oh well, I did say we were gonna do some Buddie right around here!)

Sidenote: what exactly was the meaning / reason of that phone call between Abby and her stepdaughter? We already knew Sam had children and from the was she was looking outside they could have had her just see Buck and step out of the tent to watch the rescue, so why do it this way I ask? Why this incredibly unnecessary phone call that felt so very awkward?

Also I am not gonna talk about that scene right now, because I get mad every single time!

So I will just leave a link to what I’ve said about this scene so far here *and* give you the notes I took on this scene:

ALWAYS READY TO DIE

godless heathen of a man he makes me so angry i hate him i hate this show I wanna leave

EVAN BUCKLEY LOOKS GOD IN THE EYES AND SAYS NAH BRO NOT TODAY

(It’s not like his suicidal tendencies are relevant to this meta anyways because like I said a few paragraphs ago: The whole firefam has them! )

Also, for the first time ever: here is a picture I took while watching the show because what are these two extras doing? Why are they touching like that? Who are they and will we see them again? Does my brain get easily distracted by completely unrelated things?

Anyways, the way Buck answers Sam „She’s down there waiting for you.“ when he asks for Abby and his „Good to meet you Sam.“ really brings home how none of his behaviour was about Abby and all about Buck being Buck. (And now I am angry at him again, urgh, THE NERVE! Selfless fucking himbo!)

I really liked that Sam knew who Buck was and that they got to have this little interaction where he probably reevaluated the whole night because that boy just risked his life for him, the guy marrying his ex-girlfriend, and has spent the whole night being so very nice to him and talking to him. Not gonna lie, Buck is a good guy through and through and Sam probably feels like shit now.

Also Eddie coming to stand in front of Buck - I know some people think it was out of protectiveness, which got me thinking:

Tbh at first I was convinced it was a camera angle thing? Because if Eddie stood behind Buck we wouldn’t really see him. Then I thought, so why choose this angle to film it? Obviously the set had to be built a certain way so was there no other way to do it? Also why was it even important, that we saw Eddie arrive like that, couldn’t they have just changed the angle after Abby was gone to get Eddie in the frame? Why was it important that we knew that Eddie was there and 1) was putting himself physically between Abby and Buck meaning 2) that when Abby leaves with her single father, Buck is left with his single father? Why does an episode that is supposed to give Buck closure focus so much on the reactions of his non romantic partner?

(Because tbh, even if they needed to find ways to use Ryan Guzman in this Episode without adding too many scenes, they could have done it with less focus on Abby. I say this as a Buddie shipper who does recognise how important the connection Buck and Eddie have as friends is: storyline wise Bobby would have made more sense in most of these scenes and Eddie could have been used in a different way.)

I’ll leave this scene with the very nice visual of Buck running back to the traincrash and Eddie following him. These two. Like magnets.

And a quick topic change, because I do wanna talk about Michael and Doctor Hale as well in this meta, one because I found them very cute and two because I’ve now talked to a few people about Ana and Eddie and while we by now know she will probably be in Season 4, I feel like we need to compare Michael and Doctor Hale vs Eddie and Ana. Because there is such a difference in the way these love interests where introduced.

Now, of course we need to realise that Eddie and Michael are fairly different characters and Michael has way less relationship related baggage than Eddie has which is why he goes after what he wants way faster (also, carpe diem, he just found out he won’t die). Also of course, there is no moral component to address in Michael dating some doctor vs. Eddie dating his son’s teacher, but still:

Michael and Dr. Hale had one scene together and it wasn’t even overly flirty and yet, we knew where it was heading, we felt the chemistry and everyone ended the episode saying: I ship it, more of that - which they did give us, just *one* episode later. They had some awkward moments, yet the show never left a single doubt in your mind where this is heading.

Now look at Eddie and Ana:

Sidenote: I do wanna say be kind to the character and no hate, especially not to the actress! Yes, she needs to be flashed out more; no, what we saw so far does not make me ship them; no, I do not mind if they dated a little.

First of all we learned more about Doctor Hale in the two short scenes than we did about Ana in four scenes. That seems deliberate.

Second, while we do realise Eddie thinks Ana is attractive from the get go she repeatedly shuts him down by pointedly saying „Mr. Diaz“.

Third, every scene between them - and I mean every single scene - is connected to Buck in some way:

In „Fools“ we cut from Buck saying he likes being single to Eddie doing parent-teacher conference and yes, meeting some other teachers first but also Ana, showing us that while Buck is fine with being single - Eddie might not be. Also, Carla’s „blue eyes“ line which is a little clown-y, so take it with a grain of salt that it could connect us to Buck

Then of course her next scene is Eddie getting in her face about Christopher being hurt. Later in the episode we see Buck reference this on a call, meaning either Carla or Eddie told Buck about it (I am leaning a little toward Carla making fun of Eddie in front of Buck and Eddie then having to come clean about all of it, because I cannot wrap my head about the idea of Eddie telling Buck about having a crush, I’m sorry.)

Her next scene is Eddie coming to apologise to her and she gives her speech about limitations - which we can of course connect to Buck and Eddie talking about Christopher and his limitations before that and then afterwards going skateboarding with them. (It does feel a little deliberate.)

And then of course we have „Eddie Begins“ and you guys, they could have very very easily have either Carla or Buck make a joke about Mrs. Flores and Eddie’s crush in the firehouse scene, but they didn’t! And then we do get to see her at the end where she has one whole line and Eddie barely looks at her and you know what happens? They have a child ask the same question Buck asked at the beginning, making us think of Buck. Like, it would have been enough to establish Eddie doesn’t feel like a hero if the question was asked only once - twice in the span of 45 minutes constitutes a callback, meaning we are supposed to think of the other scene and that means thinking about the other person that asked, which was Buck

And yes, once Season 4 premieres and we get Eddie and Ana in this epic romance because Tim Minear wants to be the next Rick Berman, I will go back to this meta and beat my own ass. Or something.

(Listen, her returning in Season 4 does not mean endgame or the end of Buddie, it just means Eddie might get a love interest. Tbh I actually think it could get us closer to Buddie and you know what, I’m just gonna link all my Ana Flores posts here here and here now so you can read all the other stuff I, alongside some other people, said on this topic, if you’re interested because none of this has a point right now.)

Now, let’s get into the meat of things and talk about *that* scene:

Was it a good apology? No.

Did Buck deserve better? Fuck yes.

Did he get closure? Yes.

Is the way that scene was done actually perfect? I mean, ya’ll, yes? A little?

Listen, this scene was always about closure and that’s what Buck got here and that’s what Buck needed.

Buck, who in Season 1 had described Abby as the perfect woman, needed it to go down like this so he could realise she wasn’t and he could finally let her go. And that’s what it was about!

Obviously looking at Abby’s character this episode does not make her look good, like not at all and I’d be very surprised if we ever saw her again. But looking at it from Buck’s point of view it was exactly what he needed. (Not what he deserved, but yeah, if this show was about what Buck deserved it would be a whole lot different and Buddie would be canon by now.)

One thing I really loved about the scene was the way it was filmed, with LA in front of us, Abby and Buck with their backs to the camera and us only ever seeing them in profile, because it was a private moment and this sort of made you feel like you were intruding. Like you were listening in on a conversation and I liked that a lot.

Also I think her speech about losing herself through helping people is very interesting because it contrasts her to Buck. Buck found himself in helping others and lost himself when he was no longer allowed to do that and I think that is what she means when she says she would have lost herself with him again. Because Buck is selfless and he is so selfless he inspires others to be the same, except Abby isn’t but being with Buck she would need to be and that is a problem.

Look, if you’ve followed this blog at all or maybe just read part one of the meta you have probably guessed by now that I don’t like Abby. I found her character boring. I thought she overstepped all the time. I got so mad at her for the way she treated Buck in Season 1!

Because in 1.06 she *actually* complains about him being too thoughtful and scared of messing up while calling him a *toy boy*. The truth is, after 1.05 and their first meeting, Abby no longer takes him seriously. She hardly ever takes his feelings into consideration. The relationship, from Valentines Day onward becomes all about what she wants and what she needs and our Buck is the selfless idiot who gives her his all.

I mean, she never even talked to Buck about wanting to leave, just presented him with her decision and then lived her life and never thought about him again.

And like, I think she is wrong if she thinks she’d have lost herself with him again, because Buck was what showed her that she lost herself in the first place. He helped her on the path of self-aquaintance (I guess? I’m lacking the word here), but she is right if she means the relationship wouldn’t have worked.

Because one of them would have lost themselves, though I do think it would have been Buck and not Abby. After all, Buck was the one who gave everything up from the get go and yes, Abby helped trigger him finding himself alongside Bobby and the job and she did help him stay on that path in the beginning - but in the end it was never about her at all. It was about him and him alone and the amazing person he had always been.

And I think that is what Buck realises in the scene. Despite Abby ghosting him, he still looked at her through rose coloured glasses and with fondness, but here, he realises, oh, Abby isn’t perfect. Abby isn’t like the woman I made her out to be. Abby never really cared about me. And as much as that probably hurt, this is what Buck needed to let go of her!

He needed to see that Abby wasn’t the perfect woman so he could let her go - and find himself the perfect person, someone who reciprocates and doesn’t just take. (Am I crying?)

(And look, I am not saying he already found someone like that, someone who proved in this episode how much they care about Buck and his feelings and making sure he comes home every night to his family - I’m saying he found someone who is working on being that person!)

Let’s talk about Eddie and Abby for a second, again, okay?

(Bro, how did I just get to that topic? So random! *laughs in Buddie*)

When I watched the episode my second time to take notes, I wrote one that said ‚Abby and Eddie parallels / lawsuit‘ - and I gotta be honest I barely remember what I meant. But I did still produce some thoughts (just not sure if that was where I was going with the note, so if anyone has some other ideas, please share):

You know how Abby talks about losing herself when she is with Buck? Well, I know someone who lost themselves just this season because he wasn’t with Buck! (Jup, we’re back with the lawsuit, ya’ll really thought I wouldn’t bring this up? You guys! More than 20000 words and you still don’t know me!)

It’s a very nice parallel to have Abby talking about losing herself with Buck when we saw Eddie losing himself without Buck. Because while I think Eddie himself is a selfless person just like Buck, similar to how Buck needed Abby in Season 1 as a catalyst of change so to speak, Buck was the catalyst of change for Eddie.

I talked a lot in the other parts about Eddie having problems with voicing his needs and feelings - and now please once again look at his relationship with Buck. Because here he has been doing this, not from the get go of course, Eddie didn’t take one look at Buck and his whole life was turned upside down (that was Buck looking at Eddie), but I think Buck steamrolling through Eddie’s life helped Eddie find himself. Buck, from the get go, is a calm centre for Eddie, an anchor, even after he reconnects with Shannon. Buck is who he turns to in a crisis, who he trusts with his son, with having his back.

And I think in both cases - Abby and Buck as well as Eddie and Buck - the relationship is brought to the next level through Buck’s selflessness and willingness to help. But while Abby just takes it and doesn’t really see it as the gift it is and never fully lets Buck in, Eddie does the opposite. Eddie, whether knowing or unknowing, makes himself exactly what Buck needs: someone who puts trust in him, who treats him like an equal, who opens his home and his family to him. And he also tries (and this is a big thing considering who we’re talking about right now) to be there for Buck, to be his anchor just like Buck is his - which obviously works with mixed results, because one person, no matter how hard they try can never fix the problems of someone else alone. Believe me. I’ve tried.

And wow, did that get deep and fast! Damn ya’ll and I haven’t had a drop of alcohol in like 5 days. This show really gives me all the feels!

Now, to keep me and maybe ya’ll from crying I’m gonna change the subject and talk about something else, also known as the rest of the episode:

To go back to the start of the episode, Buddie really had some extreme couple / family vibes going on, especially with Christopher in the mix. It’s telling that they included a scene of Buck and Christopher specifically and it was to remind us once again that these two have a strong bond. I won’t go all: Buddie confirmed, this is were we are heading, ya’ll! Because as you must have realised by now I am fairly cautious when it comes to this and am always fighting to keep my own clownery at bay, but I do have to say so far nothing in this show and Season 3B specifically has read as a red flag for me, disapproving the possibility or making me feel queerbaited. Now, maybe I am just very off in my intuition and they will change gear in Season 4, but well, right now I have some hope! I also loved the scene of Christopher going to camp and the card which reminded me of 3.01 and also, Eddie looks so good here! And he came so far, letting his son go to camp and all!

Of course I would have loved to see Buck there as well, but one, that would have been a Buddie confirmed and we’re not quite there yet and I’m glad cause right now they aren’t fully ready (in show terms, fanfiction is something different), and two this proves what I said about Buck and Christopher being connected and him having parental / fatherly feelings toward the boy but like, not being his actual father yet! Buck loves Chris and Chris loves Buck and obviously he is part of the Diaz family - but he also isn’t.

(Also: I went to something like camp when I was 11 and you think both my parents brought me? Nah, son, they didn’t. My dad brought me while my mom made breakfast.)

Now, some sidenotes to round it all off:

Karen is a gift and I really hope we see more of her because omg, I wanna be her friend, I wanna be her wife, I wanna learn about life from her! She is awesome and I will never fully forgive Hen for cheating on her, like girly, Eva isn’t even close to Karen on any level?

And speaking of Hen, I love the subplot of Chim coming to terms with her potentially leaving and deciding to help her because he was who she really needed on her side - not anyone else. I’d write a meta on their relationship but tbh it’s so consistent and unproblematic, I really don’t know what to write except: goals about 10000 times. Which isn’t that different to me finding new ways to write THE CONNECTION, if we’re being honest but oh well! Now it’s too late to stop that!

I loved Athena getting spooked by Bobby showing up behind her when she was getting a drink - talk about this show finally addressing the trauma these characters go through! And it only took, oh well, about 35 episodes. Let’s hope that is the energy they bring into Season 4.

Now the apology scene with Bobby, I do hate how Buck is once again the one apologising and especially since it’s with Bobby but I do think it was a nice scene and a great callback to 3.01. Also this episode showed a lot of growth in Bobby and Buck’s relationship. Because after 3a was all about Bobby projecting onto Buck and making decisions for him based on what he thought was the right thing, this episode not only had Buck standing up to Bobby in a healthy and adult way (no lawsuit this time!) but also Bobby giving in and letting Buck make the decision even if he disagreed. That is some motherforking growth right here and Babe, I hope you are not to disappointed with me, but if they keep Bobby like this I might actually begin to see his appeal to people (still need him to suffer the consequences of his actions, though).

But to end on a great note:

Buck is doing okay and - most importantly - MADNEY BABY!!! You guys, we knew it was coming from the promos and all but I cried! I cried so hard! I am so happy for them! These two soft characters and their amazing, open, caring, trusting, adult relationship deserves all the luck in their fictional universe!

Whew, you guys! We’ve done it! And it’s longer than Season 2 (I’m sorry, are ya’ll surprised? This episode was a lot!)

I feel like I should write some form of conclusion to this whole meta and yet my words elude me. Here are the few I have for you though:

This meta began with the idea that neither Buck nor Eddie really knew how to be emotionally intimate with a person and instead used sex as a substitute. This is no longer true for either character.

Buck has learned through his relationship with Abby, that he can be both physically and emotionally intimate with a person and he has proven how this is still true in his reaction to Taylor and his relationship with Ali, what little we saw of it. Furthermore Season 3B specifically showed that Buck, while still afraid to open up to people, is trying. I do think Season 4 is heading toward some kind of romance for him and while I am praying to several deities I do not believe in and the universe itself that it is Eddie, I am not sure. I hope so. But never the less, my shipping aside, Buck has grown tremendously in the course of 3 Seasons and I am so impressed both with his character and the way the show has so realistically done it. I love him. Even more than Buddie I hope we get to see him truly happy in Season 4, happy and settled and learning what life actually holds for him because that kid could rule the world if he wanted to. Now, Eddie: It’s funny, when I began this meta I felt more connected to Buck, I didn’t really see myself in Eddie, I barely had a grasp on his character at times. Now? Now he is my favourite, I love his greyness, his goodness despite his faults, the way he always struggles with himself to do better, to be better because it doesn’t come naturally to him, because it has been taught to him to do the opposite. And that is so impressive. I love the growth we saw in him, the evolution, the fight to be a better man than his own role-models and I love especially how all of this was motivated by and for his son. He truly loves him more than life itself and I am so impressed with 911 subverting something that feels like a very female storyline by giving it to a man.

But of course Eddie isn’t done yet and Eddie still struggles with intimacy and opening up but he is getting there. Through Frank and Buck and for Christopher he is fighting and he is getting there and I love that for him and about him! He deserves to be happy in Season 4 just like Buck, but mostly he deserves to be at peace with himself!

And I already talked at length about Ana and their potential and linked what I thought didn’t fit in here, so I will not bore you by repeating myself and just say: wait. Wait and see. Maybe the show will surprise us. Maybe it won’t. Maybe corona will kill us all before we have a chance to see Season 4. Maybe we are in the Matrix and the blue pill is a metaphor for being trans. Life is strange!

Also on a more personal note I wanna say thank you to everyone who has read and liked and reblogged and commented. I love all of you. Your support and trust in what I am saying has meant a lot and will mean just as much in the future and I do hope I get to do this again in like a year once they return!

(Also, not to sound needy but another reminder to please reblog and comment? Because I *am* actually writing this because I really wanna talk about the show and my feelings and your thoughts and you know, that can only happen if ya’ll do some reblogging)

(Or come to my ask if you are more comfortable being even more anonymous, I don’t judge - I NEVER ask question any other way!)

In diesem Sinne: hamma wieder was gelernt, recht herzlichen Dank für Ihre Aufmerksamkeit und auf Wiedersehen!

Also, of course, the tagging:

@chimbuckleys @angelcamael @greyhello @the-family-we-choose-118 @ipleiade @sevensoulmates

#buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie meta #buck meta #eddie meta #911 meta #911 #911 fox #meta #textpost #mine #season 3 #my meta

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adamngoodbuck · 4 years ago

Text

the well and beyond

part 1 part 2

part 3: what i keep for you in the heights

link to ao3

Eddie’s first shift back goes by smoothly, with only a few minor calls.

Being back at work helps. Eddie finds himself surrounded by his chosen family and it establishes a routine that helps ease him back into something resembling normalcy. Even with Bobby being onto him. He seems to know him better than Eddie might’ve thought. When the team is scattered around the firehouse by the end of the shift, Bobby corners him in the kitchen, coffee in hand.

“Eddie, can we talk before you go?”

“Sure, Cap. All good?”

“Yes, you?”

“Good, yes. Or getting there, I guess.” There’s no reason to hide from him. Eddie feels as transparent as glacial water with Bobby looking at him.

“That’s good, I’m glad, and just so we’re clear, I’m not going to make you grovel, okay? You know what you did wasn’t okay, you went against a direct order and made a call that risked your life. But I think you’ve tortured yourself enough and Frank will most definitely take care of the rest. So, I just want you to know one thing; we’re all rooting for you, we’re all here to help you, hold your hand and carry you when you can’t carry yourself.”

“Cap… I can’t put that on you or the team.”

“You’re not putting anything on us. You’re family. And this is what family does. There’s no question about it.”

“But it’s not fair.”

“Listen, we’ve had enough drama to last us a decade. You know there’s actually a running joke in the department. When something major happens, the Chief asks ‘was it the 118 again?’ They’ve calculated we’re responsible for eighty-three percent of the LAFD drama. But all jokes aside, yes, it’s not fair. Life isn’t fair. And yet, we just keep living.” Bobby pats him in the back as he walks away. He doesn’t leave any space for a rebuttal.

After his first group of consecutive shifts back at work, Chris is spending the night with Isabel and Eddie gets to spend the night home alone. He takes advantage of a lazy night off. He throws himself on the couch and turns on the TV on mute while he checks his social media with a beer in hand. He’s distracted, scrolling absentmindedly through Instagram when he catches a glimpse of the news. He unmutes it when he sees Hayden’s mom appear on his screen. Eddie blinks and then blinks again. There, big and bright and colorful, a recording of that night starts playing. A journalist is reporting the night’s events, but he notices in the background a clearly distressed Buck screaming and clawing at the dirt with Bobby on tow, trying to pull him back.

Eddie panics and turns the TV off. He's sitting in the dark, feeling completely drained, but the screams of terror that escaped Buck that night are now replaying constantly in his mind.

He needs to talk to Buck about this. They need to have a talk about this.

About what it means.

Eddie storms out of his house and starts his car.

---

Even if his first intention is to talk to Buck, Eddie finds himself at Bobby’s door.

He knows he’s barging in. He wasn’t invited. Bobby doesn’t even know he’s coming. He opts to send Bobby a text message letting him know his outside his house. eHe gets no answer, but the door opens wide revealing Bobby and Athena standing side by side with confused faces.

“Hey,” Eddie sighs and rubs his face with his hands.

“Eddie, is everything okay? Is Chris okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. I just-” Eddie interrupts himself when Bobby gestures for him to go inside.

“Come on in, I’ll just leave you two to it,” Athena says.

Eddie nods and tries to smile. They walk through the house until Bobby opens the door to the backyard and takes a seat at the table outside while Eddie paces around it.

“Do you-” Bobby starts, but Eddie talks over him.

“You didn’t tell me.”

“What?”

“About Buck.”

“I’m not sure I follow, Eddie.”

“I mean you didn’t tell me about Buck and how he- how he reacted when I was trapped under.”

“I didn’t think it was my place.”

“I know,” Eddie nods and takes a seat. “I know.”

“Buck cares about you. A lot. He really cares and he had a visceral reaction to- well, you know- losing you.”

“Yes, because I cut the line and he must’ve lost the weight, I can only imagine how he-” Eddie looks at the floor. He tries to think what would have been his reaction if he was the one losing the weight while Buck cut the line.

“He reacted how he reacted, there’s no denying that.”

“No, I mean, I saw it on TV.” It’s ingrained in his mind now. There will be no more avoiding it.

“You what?”

“Saw it, on TV.”

“Oh, okay. He hasn’t seen it, I think, but I’ve already talked to him about it. Have you?”

“No, I wanted to, it was the original plan when I stormed out of my house in a panic, but I ended up here instead.”

Bobby shakes his head and laughs. “You two, really.”

“The thing is that after, you know, after what happened?” Eddie feels his cheeks go from pink to read in an instant, “Buck’s been there. For me. And for Chris.”

“Yes.”

“He’s been there. Consistently.”

“Okay?” The puzzled look on Bobby’s face is baffling. Eddie’s always thought Bobby’s known all along there was something going on between Buck and him.

“Just give me a minute, okay?” Eddie groans, “This is so embarrassing.”

And Bobby is so patient. He smiles and he waits in silence for him to just get the fucking words out.

“He’s been there since the moment I met him, I think. Since the earthquake and I don’t know how, but somewhere along the line, I think we might have become something more. More than friends. More than best friends. And, I’m just confused and I’m scared and maybe a little bit of a coward.”

“Have you two discussed this?” Bobby asks.

“No. I couldn’t. I tried. I just couldn’t. I think he tried too, but-”

“I once told Buck that to be a good partner he needed to step inside the bubble, with all the baggage and the history, and not to try and take his partner out of it. It was when Abby- it doesn’t matter. The point is that he’s learned from that experience all those years ago and he’s changed his way of dealing with intimacy and closeness. But you know what? You should talk to him about it,” Bobby suggests.

“What if he doesn’t- fuck, this is lame.” Eddie shakes his head and plants his forehead on the table. “What if he doesn’t reciprocate?” He feels like a teenager having a crush on his best friend, even though he knows this is so much more than that. So much more than a crush.

“You should give him the chance to tell you himself how he feels,” Bobby suggests.

“I know. I know. I’m too much of a coward to risk it.”

“It’s okay to be scared, but you should trust yourself. And him. But mostly, you should trust what you two have, Eddie.”

---

Days and weeks keep piling on and on and Eddie tells himself that he is taking the time to muster up the courage to talk to Buck. He really is trying to find the right time and the right place. But life just won’t give Eddie a break.

First, Red comes into Buck’s life and he’s turned into a bleak, somber, doubtful version of himself. Eddie tries to be there for him, but he’s too much of a coward to offer what Buck now needs. He thought he was ready, but when confronted with the reality of it, he’d backed off and walked away silently.

Soon after, Abby reappears like a hurricane with a force that leaves Eddie spinning out, and Buck, transformed.

The universe must really hate him. Eddie believes timing might be his worst enemy.

Only now Chris is going away for two weeks and he’ll have the house to himself and Buck to himself and-

No. To have Buck he needs to talk to him first.

#buddie #buddie fic #911 fic #911 fox #911 on fox #eddie diaz #evan buckley #bobby nash #one more part and we're done #pre relationship #AND PINING #SO #MUCH #PINING #eddie is a pining machine

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croonerboy1965 · 4 years ago

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As Many Forms of Love: Chapter 2- Thief of Hearts

By librarian-von-sassypants and croonerboy1965

Eddie didn’t detest formal dances exactly. He knew there wee good reasons for this one. It solidified his social standing, gave him less of an air of “crazy loner with the damaged son” which many people wanted to attribute to him. He just never saw the point of them otherwise. Crowding one hundred of your closest neighbors into a too-small room, making them dance and fraternize and eat food that everyone secretly thought was sub-par, where everyone talked about everyone else behind their backs, and smiled prettily to their faces.

Eddie had the good fortune of being a conventionally attractive man, and wealthy. He never lacked for conversation or dance partners, and he played the part obligingly, but if he had his way, he’d spend the evening with a book and a glass of brandy, or perhaps reading Christopher bedtime stories.

He’d made one ally early on. Lady Lena Bosko. Utterly beautiful, charming, and, as far as Eddie could tell, utterly uninterested in the company of men, at least in a romantic sense. She was the only female in the room, it seemed, who was not trying to foist hints of marriage upon him, and thus had become a wonderful companion with whom he could simply stand back and observe the party.

“Lady Fortense is absolutely sleeping with the Earl of Viconze,” she whispered to him behind her fan.

He was slightly enamoured with the way her vibrant red hair caught the candlelight around them and reflected it back like fire.

“She would never admit to it, of course, and neither would he, but you can bet her husband knows.”, she said.

Lena was abreast of all the latest gossip, and the circle she chose to share her vast knowledge with was small indeed.

“Poor Viconze,” Eddie remarked as he took another sip of his wine. “She’ll eat him alive.”

Lena smirked.

“She most certainly will.”, she said, biting into the ripe berry she pulled from the lip of Eddie’s glass.

Eddie was well aware that most people took their lingering on the edges of the room together to be a declaration of intent to marry, or at least of amorous feelings. In a way he took it for granted. He needed to find a wife. He knew, and Lena would make a spectacular one.

“So what about you?”, he asked. “Any inclination to nab yourself a husband? I am single, you know.”, Eddie said, as he took her hand in his and kissed the tips of her fingers gently.

Lena giggled and pulled her hand away, feigning shyness as she fanned herself, turning away.

“Well, you are charming, sir. And I can definitely see the benefit of a mutual bond.”, she said.

“Sadly, I have no real interest in the carnal pleasures of the company of men...You on the other hand,” She gave him a knowing look.

Eddie, looked down at his feet, and flushed hot in the face.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”, he said with mock indignation. Then he broke into a smile and they both laughed out loud.

“I guess we’re both just a couple of mavericks.” she said, taking his hand again and giving it a squeeze.

“Still-- it’s nice to have a friend in all this.”, Eddie motioned to the crowded ballroom.

It had been a month since he’d gotten settled into his country estate, made the tour of the surrounding homes, and introduced himself and Christopher the neighbors. Lena was by far his favorite of the lot, and he had visited her estate, where she lived with her aging father.

To their left, a hush seemed to ripple over the crowd, as a new guest arrived.

“Lady Arielle Valens, and Escort”, the announcer said. Lena commented without looking over.

“Everyone’s been up in arms about who she will invite to her ball later this year. It’s supposed to be one of the most exclusive and sought after invitations of the season.” She said to Eddie as she took a long swig from his wine.

A voluptuous woman entered the room, with a dashing, young, strawberry blonde man on her arm. Her face was set in a smile that seemed chiseled from stone, not quite real, not quite false. She wasn’t remarkable looking by any stretch of the imagination.

“There’s something… mysterious about her---intriguing.”, said Eddie. He had only met her once when he’d introduced himself initially, but on second look, was caught up in her strange web. Something about the way her blue eyes latched on and didn’t let go. Or how there was a secret second smile hidden beneath the veneer, one blossomed like the sun, when she’d sat in her drawing room with Christopher, who had regaled her with tales of growing up in London. That boy could charm the pants off of a gargoyle if given the chance, and Lady Arielle could not help but let her guard down, in spite of herself.

She and her companion were making the rounds of the room, and when they drew near to Eddie and Lena, she looked over, and winked conspiratorially.

Eddie couldn’t help but grin.

“A friend of yours?” Eddie asked.

Lena, he noted with some surprise, flushed so red she was nearly purple, and buried her face in her fan with a small grin she couldn’t seem to pry off her face.

“We have...met.”, she said.

“Well, we will absolutely be discussing that, later.”, Eddie said.

Eddie let his gaze linger over Arielle’s companion. She was, to everyone’s widespread knowledge, quite single, but managed to show up to parties with ridiculously attractive men on her arm, and this new one was no exception. Tall, thin, with strawberry blond curls, cheekbones that could cut glass, and a smile that whispered of both sex and confidence with each glance. There was something vaguely familiar about him, Eddie thought, though he couldn’t quite place it.

“Her new one is rather attractive,” Lena commented as the two of them watched the newcomers make a slow circle of the ballroom. Every single eye in the room was doing the same, though most everyone pretended to be busy doing anything else.

“Hmm?” Eddie was distracted.

“Lady Arielle’s new companion. I haven’t seen him before.” Lena said. There was jealousy in her eyes, Eddie was sure of it, but she didn’t take well to teasing, so he held his tongue.

Once they had made a full circuit of the ballroom, Lady Arielle and her companion ended up in proximity to Lena and Eddie, as several of the guests slowly gravitated into their orbit.

“Lord Diaz, Lady Bosko, delighted to see you again,” Lady Arielle made a small curtsy, and nod of her head. “May I introduce my friend, Sir Evan, Lord of Buckley Manor.”

Eddie had never heard of Buckley manor, and he’d studied the surrounding area extensively during his decision to move. Still, no one would ever call her out on it, definitely not Eddie, so he stayed comfortable in the knowledge.

“Pleasure to meet you,” Eddie sticks out his hand for the man to shake. Lord Buckley takes his hand gingerly, and even through the gloves, Eddie can feel the heat radiating off him. The man doesn’t do that usual firmer than necessary handshake, as men so often do with Eddie, in an attempt to assert dominance.

“This is Miss Lena Bosko,” Eddie introduced them, as Buckley took her hand and brought it to his lips, kissing the air just above it.

“The pleasure’s mine,” Buckley said, and the smile he gave her was absolutely breathtaking. ‘Too bad he’s barking up the wrong tree.’, Lena thought to herself.

“You both must come to my house for tea next week,” Lady Arielle smiled, though it was a mere whisper of her full force. “Do, bring Christopher!”

“Christopher?” Buckley asked the question, and then looked like he wished he could stuff the words back inside himself. Lady Arielle either didn’t notice or chose not to.

“Lord Eddie’s son!”, she said brightly, a little bit of sunshine leaked out when she talked about Chris. “Absolutely the most charming human I’ve ever come across. Buck is staying with us for a few weeks... He loves kids, don’t you Buck?”, she said.

So it was Buck now. Eddie made a note in his mental ledger.

“Indeed!” Buck says with a smile, but doesn’t quite meet Eddie’s eyes.

Just then, a waltz began to play.

“Shall we have a dance?”, Lena said, in an attempt to break the tension.

“Of course.”, Eddie said.

“Shall we?”, said Buck, as he took Lady Valens by the arm and led her to the floor.

Arielle followed and soon they were swallowed up by the whirling flashes of color from a room full of glorious gowns.

Lena looked at Eddie as he led her round, her brow furrowed.

“Eddie, what is it?”, she asked.

“Nothing.”, he said as he guided her, a bit stiffly, in any direction that might put some distance between them and the Lady Valens.

“Eddie.”, Lena pressed. He was looking off in Buck and Arielle’s direction.

“How well do you know, the Lady Valens?”, he asked.

Lena cleared her throat, and said, “Fairly well.”

“How well?”, Eddie insisted.

“Well. Very well.”, she retorted, indicating she meant to add no more.

“Why?”, she asked.

“It’s just--her companion--”, but he was cut off as the pair of them bumped into he and Lena, throwing them ever so slightly off their rhythm.

“I beg your pardon, sir.”, Buck said, throwing Eddie a mischievous grin.

“Mind your steps!”, Eddie spat through a tight smile. As he came round to meet him on the next turn, Eddie almost caught his foot on the hem of Arielle’s gown, his eyes locked on Buck’s.

“Mind yours!”, Buck said, in mock indignation.

“Wha--?!”, Eddie scoffed.

“Buck! Mind your manners!”, Arielle said.

“Apologies Miss.”, Buck said, eyeing her buxom breasts. He thought perhaps he brushed them inadvertently.

“Not me, you nit!”, she said.

They had stopped in mid-round.

Buck looked up, face now red, and met Eddie’s gaze yet again. Try as he might, he could not speak. He felt embarrassed, yet --there was something else.

Lena turned away from Eddie, and tapped Arielle, on the shoulder.

“Might I cut in?”, she said. Arielle’s face became sunny, and she said, “But of course, Madame.”

Arielle met her palm in Lena’s and Lena placed her other hand around Arielle’s waist.

“Men.”, Lena sighed.

As they began their first turn on the floor, Arielle pushed her backside into Evan’s and he came immediately up against Eddie. Not knowing what else to do, he took Eddie in hand and began leading him in a waltz. The closeness, their eyes locked together, the slightest scent of sweet anise on Buck’s breath. His lips were crimson, almost blood red against his pale skin. Buck was slightly taller but his taught frame felt sinewy in Eddie’s arms. This made Eddie harden in his nethers, in spite of his better judgement.

Buck felt Eddie pressing against him, and his own rig twitched with desire.

He recalled the same sensation a few weeks ago, on the road. Buck could not believe he did not realize it sooner. This man. Sure, he is more groomed, more cultivated, more polished. But it is the same man. The one he almost robbed. The one he inadvertently molested.

He can see the exact second Eddie sees it on his face. Eddie can suddenly see through him. The brigand from the road. Nearly unrecognizable in a fashionable emerald waistcoat and cravat, but Eddie would recognize those eyes anywhere. Those stunning blue eyes.

It hits them both like an avalanche.

“YOU!?”, they said in unison. They separated, suddenly aware they had been pressed together a bit longer than either one intended. Then covered themselves as each one spied the other’s reaction to said closeness. They quickly covered themselves with their hands in as polite a clasp as they could manage. Evan could not believe this was the same man. He was so...regal. So...handsome. Not at all like the disheveled traveler he’s nearly robbed a fortnight ago.

“I believe it might be time for you to call it an evening, Lord Buckley.” he said, mocking the title.

“Indeed.”, Buck said, turning to go without another word. As he left, he slid past Kingston, who glared at him, and then looked worriedly at Eddie.

Eddie put up a hand, and then put it quickly back down again, to cover himself. “It’s alright, Kingston, it’s been taken care of.”, he said.

“What have you done?”, Arielle said, looking accusingly at Eddie. “Buck! Wait!” she called after him, but he was gone. Lena shot him a look.

“What?”, Eddie said.

“Miss Valens…” Eddie said. “My deepest apologies, I shall have Kingston call you a carriage, and escort you home.”

“I think you’ve done quite enough.”, Lena said. “I shall escort Lady Valens home.”

Lady Valens, gave her a sheepish look. “How kind.”, she said. And they paraded past Kingston, who looked quite confused.

==============================================================================

Buck walked briskly toward the gate, and as he opened it, he was met by the two henchman he was in league with. He stopped, hands raised.

“Hi fellas.”, he said.

“Hello to you.”, the larger of the two said, his gun drawn on Buck.

“Griff…”, he said, “We are calling this one off.”

“Cawlin’ it off??!!”, Griff said. “I don’t fink so.”, he stepped forward and Buck stepped back.

“I s’pose you were finking of leaving me and Shep out in the cold and taking all the booty for yourself, eh?”. Griff said.

“Yeah, yew tryin’t’ cut us owt?”, Shepp said. He puffed out his chest. He was a full head and a half shorter than Griff and Buck. He sniffed and wiped his nose on the sleeve of his coat. Griff looked over his shoulder at Shepp, making sure to intimidate him. Shepp shrank down and looked at the ground.

“Look, they just moved here, there really isn’t enough to bother looting.”, Buck tried to sound convincing,

Griff looked back toward the manor, and he could hear the chatter of voices and the strains of music off in the distance.

“Sounds to me like it’s ripe for the picking, wut wif all the fancy laawds and laydees and wot not.”, Griff said.

Buck tried to sound forceful in his protest.

“NO! I hired you and I say what goes! And I say, we aren’t doing this!”, Buck said as he stepped to Griff.

Griff took the butt of his gun and cracked Buck on the head, knocking him out. He fell like a rag doll to the ground.

“Who’s the boss now, eh?”, Griff said.

They stepped over Buck’s unconscious body and off in the direction of the house.

Just as Lena and Arielle, made it to the door, they stopped dead, as Griff pushed his way in and forced them back inside. Once in the ballroom, he announced, “Awright everyone, This is a sick up! Get your ‘ands in the air!”

The crowd stood still for a moment as the music stopped, unsure if this was really happening.

Griff shot the pistol into the air over his head. The loud blast cause some of the ladies to scream.

“I said, get ‘em up!”, he ordered. Now, if you do as we say, no one’s gonna get ‘urt…Put all your money and fancy jewels in this here bag,”, Griff said, as Shepp took out a satchel and went around the room collecting valuables.

Griff looked over at Eddie, who was stepping protectively in front of Lena and Arielle. He motioned at them to join the crowd now pressed against each other at the far end of the room. “Now nobody move and we will be off shortly, and y’can go back to your li’l soiree--“, Griff said, just as he heard a small voice from behind, him.

“Papa?!”, Christopher said as he made his way bleary eyed down the stairs.

Griff whirled on him and instinctively fired his gun.

“No!” Eddie shouted and he ran at Christopher and dove to grab him up.

The bullet went straight into Eddie’s back, just as he reached his son, shielding him from the blow. Christopher screamed.

Buck burst into the room, his eyes as wide as plates, and his mouth dropped open. Blood was streaming down the side of his face, as he looked first at Lena, then Arielle, then Griff and finally Eddie. He thought he should charge at Griff, but Kingston was already there and tacking him to the ground. Kingston smashed the man to his back and throttled him with one hand while gripping Griff by the wrist with the other. He put his full weight to bear on him and bashed his gun hand on the marble flooring repeatedly until the gun came free. Sheep, dropped the sack of valuables and made way to the gun, but Lady Valens was there first and cold cocked him squarely in the face, sending him flying, flat on his back. This made Buck smile just for a moment, and then his thoughts returned to Eddie. Lena was already at his side, when he reached them. Christopher was crying and squeezing his father around the neck, his face buried in Eddie’s shoulder.

“Papa! Pappa, NO!”, he cried.

Lena tried to calm Christopher, so she could turn Eddie over, but he would not be moved.

“Eddie…Eddie! Wake up!”, she wailed into his ear. Buck moved in and managed to pry the boy off so Eddie could be laid on his back.

Griff tried to wrestle himself free, but Arielle had him. She scooped up the pistol, cocked the hammer and said, “Don’t even think about it.”

“You go collect the little one, I’ve got this one well in hand, sir.”

She motioned for Kingston to get up and she took his place, straddling Griff, sitting her full weight upon him. Griff thought for a moment this might be something akin to fun, in any other context. He half smiled at her as he felt her fit into his lap.

“Don’t get any funny ideas, you hear?” She pointed the barrel down to the waistband area his pants, pressing the barrel against the fabric of her skirt hard enough where he could feel it tucked neatly between them. Griff’s half-grin faded to a look of horror as Arielle leaned in and whispered, “Best save that for the boys in the big house, eh? I hear they like a stodgy man-toy.”

Kingston, took the binding cords from the drapes and bound Shepp. “Someone fetch a doctor! And get the constable!”

Eddie loosed his hold on Christopher, who immediately threw himself forward on to Eddie’s chest and wept. His glasses were all akimbo as he pressed his face into his father.

“Right away!”, Buck stood and dashed out the door. He headed for the carriage house and unhitched and mounted the nearest horse. “Hyahh!”, he commanded. The horse bolted forward and off he rode into the night.

#regency #911 fanfic #buddie

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let-me-love-you-loki · 5 years ago

Text

An Ending Within--Ch. 5

Chapter 5

“Daisy, come here,” I said, sitting on the top turnbuckle of the practice ring at Black and Brave. The structure bounced as the tall brunette climbed into the ring and bounced, warming up.

I hopped down and stretched my shoulders. “Let’s work on that collar and elbow lock up.” I took position—right foot forward, balancing my weight on a wide base, arms up, elbows soft, wrists and palms aligned. Across the ring, Daisy did the same. I studied her form carefully, watching for her balance and position.

We took a moment to look at one another. On a nod, we met in the center of the ring, chests parallel, right hands hooked around each other’s necks, left arms folded over, fingers wrapped around our opponent’s elbow.

I pushed her back and she stumbled, tripping over her own feet. I released, letting her wobble into the ropes.

“Again,” I commanded, backing up and taking position once more.

Daisy rolled her shoulders and wiggled her fingers. She moved first, rushing to the middle of the ring. I met her, slamming into the hold hard. She pushed, trying to do to me what I’d done to her. I tightened my hold on her neck, pulled down on her elbow, and shifted my weight to my front leg. My back foot popped up, bent at the knee, and slammed ball first into the mat to jam me in place. I pushed off with the back foot, using her force against her. She rocked back onto her heels and overcompensated, falling hard on her ass.

“Again.”

***

I sat in my favorite booth at 392 dport, watching people coming and going. There was a new guy who was training with one of our long-time baristas. He looked like he was picking things up quickly. Whenever they looked my way, I made sure to give him an encouraging smile.

The electronic bell at the door let out its bing-bong as someone stepped in out of the rain. Familiar electricity snapped along my skin as Seth tugged down the hood of his zippered jacket and slipped behind the counter, saying his hellos and providing encouragement to the new recruit. Then he buzzed around the espresso machine, putting together the concoction of his that was stronger than anything I’d ever tasted. How he managed it, I’d never know.

He grinned as he slid into the seat across from me. I couldn’t help but smile back, seeing that little gap between his front teeth and the way his eyes crinkled. My heart dropped into my toes.

“How was class?” he asked, stretching himself out in the booth. He reached across the table, our fingertips touching.

“Daisy is struggling with the basics. Chris has what it takes to do well on the independents, but I don’t know if he’s pro material. Logan… I don’t know why he’s with us. He should already be signed to a promotion. He doesn’t need to train, he needs to compete.” I tilted my head to the side and watched Seth savor his caffeine concoction.

“I’m working on it. I might be able to get him a spot in ROH. Depends on who calls me back.” He curled his fingers around mine.

I felt my smile soften. He worked so hard for the students. I was amazed every day by the man he was—the husband, the father, the mentor, the teacher, the athlete, the friend. There was so much about him that I could love, and new things showed up all the time.

“Can we talk about my debut this week?” I asked quietly. Even though we seemed to have some common ground about my decision to sign with AEW, I was always afraid of how Seth might take the discussion.

A momentary flash of hurt. A faint dimming of wide brown eyes. There then gone again. Pushed away by a genuine smile and a thrum of excited buzz in the space between us.

“Right, you had that call this morning. How’d it go?”

Relief. Happiness. Gratitude. Emotions flooded through me faster than I could name them. “Good. So, I don’t know if you know what’s been going on over there, but Dean—Jon, I have to remember it’s Jon now—is on his way to a title shot against Jericho. And Jericho has his goons, right, and they’ve been beating up on D—Jon a lot lately.”

Seth nodded. His expression was unreadable. I couldn’t tell if he was pleased with the idea that his former partner was getting his ass handed to him every week or not.

“They’re thinking he needs some backup,” he said knowingly.

It was my turn to nod. “I don’t know how they’re going to work in our ‘past partnership’ but they’ll figure something out. And they’re opening the door back up for intergender wrestling over there… who knows what might happen?”

“Is that the storyline they’ve got for you? His friend?”

Pressure, squeezing his fingers tightly. “I have almost full creative control on my character, Seth. And they actually listen when you pitch story ideas. After I got off the call with Cody and the Bucks, I had a seriously long talk with Jericho. This is a good place for me.”

Quiet descended for a moment, broken only by the hiss of the espresso machine and the bing-bong of the door. I watched him, hoping that he would understand.

“If you’re happy, then that’s all that matters,” he said at last. His fingers reached out and twined around mine, squeezing gently. “I’m sure you’ll be running the place in a month.”

I gave him a sideways smile. “Will you watch?”

“With Sefina if I can. She’s going to know that her mother is a badass.”

***

Nerves made my stomach turn. A tingle burst to life along my skin. Static buzzed in my ears. My heart pounded. The world was lit up in Technicolor.

It was the moment before a lightning strike. The awe of watching the water rush from the shore before a tsunami strikes.

I bounced in gorilla, feeling my heart jump into my throat and back again. Warmth slipped into my limbs. Time compressed. Stretched out then rushed by.

“You okay?”

I turned to see Kenny approaching. He had opened the show with a killer match. You wouldn’t know it to look at him. He wore an AEW hooded sweatshirt and jeans, his two-toned hair somewhere between fluffy and damp. His hands were stuffed into the pockets of his sweatshirt. Kenny had been kind to me since the day I set foot in the doors of AEW.

“Yeah,” I said, doing a little shoulder wiggle like Jon used to do. Adrenaline spilled into my veins. “I’m ready to get out there. It’s amazing to be nervous like this again.”

Kenny nodded and grinned, closing the space between us. He settled his hands on my shoulders and squeezed. “You’re going to be fantastic. I promise you; it’s going to be just as big of a moment as when Jon showed up. Maybe even bigger.”

I grinned back and bounced once more. “Thanks, Kenny. Security ready?”

A guy dressed all in black nodded from the corner. Kenny gave me one last squeeze on the shoulders before pushing me gently toward my escort. I followed the surly security guard out to the concourse. A few fans were at concessions or coming back from the merch table. At least two of them recognized me. I grinned and put my finger to my lips.

At last, there I was. Standing in the tunnel that led to the floor level. AEW venues were smaller than the arenas I was used to. I missed coming from deep within the fans, but there was more space to ham it up this way.

It reminded me of my days with the Shield… coming in through the crowd.

My security and I stood in the tunnel out of sight from the fans. I could see what was going on in the ring, waiting on my cue. Jon was in the ring, Jericho and one of his goons, Jake Hager, across from him. Both Jon and Jericho had mics, talking shit and throwing threats, running up the hype for the pay-per-view that was coming up. They had the main event for the championship.

Their feud was legendary. And that final match was going to be brutally beautiful.

Unsurprisingly, it all broke down into a brawl. Jon launched himself at Jericho and started wailing on him. Hager joined in the fight, turning the scrap to Jericho’s favor. I watched as Jon burst through them, creating some space to catch his breath. He let out a roar and, the moment he got his breath back, ready to launch himself forward again.

“Here I go,” I whispered.

My music hit, the guitar heavy rock anthem spilling through the speakers. I took a deep breath and took off running. Jon stopped, so did Jericho and Hager. All looking toward me. The crowd popped, vindicated in their belief in the dirt sheets. My debut had been anticipated for months. I could only imagine the announce team.

“Is that…?” Excalibur questioned.

“Looks like the rumors were true!” Tony Schiavone replied.

“That’s Leighton Black!” JR shouted. “Jon Moxley’s old tag team partner!”

I hopped the barrier and slid under the bottom rope. I jumped to my feet and took off toward Jericho. Jon slammed hard into Hager, knocking him onto his back and slamming closed fists into the bigger man’s head. I ran at Jericho, but he dropped to the mat and rolled out to the outside. He scrambled to the ramp, yelling for Hager to follow.

A moment later, it was just the two of us—Jon and me. For the first time in what felt like forever, we stood across from one another in a wrestling ring. He looked at me, the light in his blue eyes so bright they looked like ice. We grinned at each other.

My heart thumped with joy.

Jon grabbed me up in the center of the ring, lifting me off my feet and hugging me tightly. When he set me on my feet, he pressed his forehead to mine and held my head between his hands.

Just like he used to.

“It’s good to be back, dollface,” Jon said just before dropping a kiss on the top of my head.

We turned together, facing the still retreating Jericho and Hager. Jon started shouting, talking smack about what he was going to do at the pay-per-view. He hooked his arm around my neck, dragging me toward the ropes. Jon climbed up on the middle rope, leaning over as he shouted taunts and obscenities at the retreating Jericho and Hager.

Jon hopped down and turned toward me, the grin on his face as bright as the one he wore during our very first TV match together. My heart missed a beat, stealing my breath. I closed the distance between us and grabbed him by the shoulder. He spun around, still grinning and swearing. I smirked and kicked out, hitting him square in the stomach, doubling him over.

I hooked his arms and snapped him toward the mat—flattening him out with his own finisher. The Paradigm Shift… the move I’d used a thousand times, the one I’d known as the Dirty Deeds. The moment the mat reverberated with the impact, the crowd exploded with jeers and shouts.

I tucked the tip of my boot under Jon’s body. I rolled him over onto his back and stood over him, one boot on his chest. My gaze went to the ramp, where Jericho stood with his title on his shoulder. He raised a mic to his lips.

“Leighton Black!” He grinned sadistically. “That’s my girl.”

I grinned back, unzipping my AEW hoodie to reveal an Inner Circle t-shirt. Judas thundered through the sound system. I slipped beneath the bottom rope and sauntered up the ramp toward my new faction. The camera swept by me. I stared into the lens, giving a dramatic shrug and saying, “Sorry, Jon. It’s just business.”

Oh, I thought as Jericho swung a free arm around my shoulders, this is going to be fun.

_______________________________________________________________

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minimuffinmountain · 7 years ago

Text

Welcome to the Family (One-shot)

Summary: After you elope with your now-husband Bucky Barnes, Tony agrees to let your family spend Christmas with the Avengers at the Compound. But when it’s revealed that your family is nothing short of “Fantastic”, things start to unravel and family secrets are found out.

Relationships: Bucky Barnes/Pregnant!Reader

Warnings: Swearing

A/N: I have not seen the Fantastic Four reboot, so I’m using the early 2000′s versions in this story (meaning Johnny Storm is played by Chris Evans, not Michael B. Jordan). Also, I had no idea how to end this so I’m sorry if it stops abruptly >_>;

“Oh my god, I can’t wait for you guys to meet them!” you said, all but bouncing up and down with joy. You would’ve been bouncing if not for your hugely pregnant belly and overprotective husband, James “Bucky” Buchanan Barnes. He was already eyeing you warily, and not just because he was afraid of you bouncing off the walls.

Eight months ago Bucky had gotten you pregnant after about a year of steady dating. Being from the 1940’s, Bucky’s first instinct in such a situation was to get down on one knee and beg you to be his wife, preferably before your father found out and shot him. You had agreed on the condition that it’d be a small ceremony, and Bucky agreed. However, Bucky’d never imagined your idea of a ‘small ceremony’ was being married in the NYC courthouse with only Steve and Natasha as witnesses.

In other words, the two of you had eloped.

Bucky was - for the first time in a long time - scared out of his mind. Tony had agreed to let your family come to the Compound to celebrate Christmas, meaning he’d be meeting his in-laws for the first time. Your parents had passed away in a car crash when you were in your early 20’s, leaving your older sister, her family, and your twin brother to make the trip. They were all coming up together, much to your brother’s complaint.

“Excuse me, Mrs. Barnes?” said F.R.I.D.A.Y.

“Yes?”

“A family by the name of ‘Richards' is here to see you. They say they're family?”

“Yes! Omygosh yes, let them in!” You turn to the Avengers with a megawatt smile on your face. “You all stay here, I’ll go get them!” You turn on your heel and waddle into the elevators. As the doors close you see Bucky give you a look of wide-eyed panic.

Oh, let the fun begin!

------

“Jesus, this place is in the middle of nowhere!”

You smile as you hear your brother complaints echo through the garage. You turn the corner and there they are.

“Susie! Reed! Johnny!”

The three turn and you rush toward them. Reed is holding his and Sue’s four-year-old son Franklin, and Sue is holding a baby carrier that must be holding your new baby niece, Valeria. Johnny has a big smile on his face, and you can tell he’s trying not to laugh at your ridiculous waddle-run.

“Y/N! It’s goo-” Reed is cut off as Franklin squeals and jumps out of his father’s arms and runs full speed toward you.

“Auntie Y/N!” he yells, but before he can collide with you, two hands grab him under his arms and pull him back into Reeds arms.

“Good catch Reed,” you laugh as you rub your belly.

“Yeah that could have been a disaster,” chuckles Johnny. He scoops Franklin out of his brother-in-law’s arms and twirls him around at arms length. Franklin immediately stops pouting and squeals with delight as he flies through the air.

“Johnny, stop it before you make him sick.” Sue huffs at your brother and he laughs. He listens to her though and hands Franklin back to Reed.

“Aw, c’mon Sue. Let me spoil my favorite nephew.”

“Careful Johnny,” you smirk, “my son might get the wrong idea.”

Johnny spins around so fast you’re afraid he’ll get whiplash. “You’re having a boy?” he asks, a smile plastered on his face. You laugh and nod, rubbing slow circles along your belly. Johnny whoops with delight and does a little dance. “Yes! Boys for the win!” he shouts. You laugh at your brother’s antics along with Franklin. Reed and Sue just shake their heads.

“So where is this new husband of yours?” asks Sue. “I was looking forward to meeting him.”

“And setting his ass on fire,” adds Johnny.

“Johnny…” warns Reed, “little ears are listening.”

Franklin giggles and you smile. “He's upstairs with everyone else. Oh, and Johnny?” Your brother turns to you. “Captain America's here too.”

You and your twin share a devilish smile.

“Well, this should be fun,” he chuckled, rubbing his hands together wickedly. You cackled fiendishly, making your sister and her husband sigh and roll their eyes.

This was going to be a long night.

------

“What’s taking them so long?” Bucky mutters under his breath as he paces the room. The rest of the Avengers look at him with mixed emotions that range from exasperation to amusement. Steve gets up from his stool at the bar and walks over to his friend.

“Relax Buck,” he says, putting his hand on Bucky’s shoulder, “I'm sure they're just catching up. Come sit before you wear a hole through the floor.” Bucky opens his mouth to say something, but before anything can come out Bucky hears the sound of voices approaching.

“Here we are!” you say, throwing your arms open in a ‘ta-dah!’ fashion. Bucky turns to see his wife leading a woman and a man around the corner. The woman has blonde hair and is holding a baby carrier, while the man has dark hair with silver side streaks and is holding the hand of a small blonde boy. “Everybody, this is my family; my sister Sue, her husband Reed, their two children Franklin and Valeria, and my brother…” You pause, realizing your brother is not there. “Johnny?”

“Right here!” he says as he rounds the corner. You hear an intake of breath from behind you and turn to see all the Avengers staring between your brother and Steve. Steve himself looks like he’s swallowed a porcupine and your husband is as pale as a sheet and looks like he is about to vomit.

“... What the hell?” Clint hissed. You try not to burst into a fit of giggles.

“Everybody, meet my twin brother Johnny Storm!” Johnny smiles and you hear Bucky make a strangled sound.

“T-twin?” Bucky stutters, still not believing the doppelgänger of his best friend is here in this room, let alone related to his wife.

“Yep! Older by 12 minutes,” Johnny declares as he slings his arm over your shoulders. You roll your eyes and shake his arm off to go and stand by Bucky.

“Susie, Reed, Johnny, this is Bucky Barnes, my husband.” Bucky nods a ‘hello’ at the trio, and Johnny grins devilishly.

“It’s very nice to meet you,” greets Reed as he shakes hands with Bucky.

“Y/N has told us so much about you,” says Sue.

“So you’re the asshole that knocked up my sister,” Johnny growls as he mock-glares at your husband.

“Johnny!” you and your sister yell as Reed covers Franklin’s ears. Bucky gulps.

“I-I uh….”

“And then you had the balls to convince her to elope,” your twin continues.

“That was my idea Jonathan,” you seethed.

“Aw, c’mon Y/N, you know I’m only joking!” he chuckles. “And did you really have to use my full name?”

“Well technically your real name is Jonathan Lowell-”

“Ack! Stop!” he yells as he covers his ears, and you and your family laugh.

“Uh… how about we stop standing around gaping and eat?” asks Tony. “The food will be cold by the time we eat if we keep this up.”

“Sure thing Tony,” you giggle as you lace your fingers with Bucky’s and everybody walks to the dining area.

-------

After dinner was done with and everybody had gotten to know each other, things ran a bit more smoothly. Until, of course, the subject of your “wedding” (or lack thereof) came up.

“But seriously Y/N, why would you choose to elope?” asked your sister, a look of hurt on her face. You sighed, sinking further into the living room couch, knowing that this was not going to be an easy subject.

“I didn’t want the fuss of a big wedding like you and Reed had,” you said. “It took you, what, three tries before you finally tied the knot?”

“I thought it was four,” supplied Johnny. Sue glares at your brother.

“But you couldn’t have at least called one of us so you could have a family member there?”

“Who said I didn’t have family there? Steve was the Best Man!”

“Look-alikes don’t count,” chastised Johnny. You simmered in your seat on the couch, creating a patch of ice crystals at your feet.

“Who’s side are you on?” you spat at your brother, who just chuckled and shrugged. “Besides, Steve is family, and I can prove it!” You pushed off the couch and waddled over to the giant flat-screen that doubled as a computer monitor. “F.R.I.D.A.Y., pull up the family tree I’ve been working on.”

The screen flashed blue before displaying your family tree. You were technically a biologist, but you had dabbled in genealogy in college. It had started with a small family tree of just you, your siblings, your parents and grandparents, but as the years passed you added more and more until you were tracing your family back to the 1800’s.

“See? Here we are,” you zoomed in and pointed to your family’s names almost at the bottom level of the tree (you had added Franklin and Valeria recently), “and here is Steve.” You scrolled up to your great-great-grandparents and scooted over to their first child, Grant Rogers, and his wife Sarah. Sure enough, branching off below the couple was a box with the name Steven Grant Rogers in the center followed by the date July 4, 1918.

The room was silent for about 2 seconds before it erupted into chaos. Johnny, Clint, and Sam burst out laughing; Natasha, Wanda and Vision entered a heated discussion over the odds of Johnny looking like Steve over such a vast generation gap. Tony began demanding samples of everybody’s DNA to really see if they are related, with Bruce and Rhodey trying to calm him down. Sue and Steve were in a state of shock, and Bucky had his head between his legs while doing deep breathing exercises. Your brother-in-law was the only calm one, as he was thoroughly examining the family tree on the monitor and explaining it to Franklin - who, for the record, was more focused on Steve than listening to his father.

“We’re related?” Steve gasped. “How?”

“You’re father was my great-grandmother’s brother, making us first cousins twice removed.”

“I-I remember my Ma saying my dad had a sister, but I never knew she had a family or that I had cousins. I never met them because she moved to the Midwest after the Great War.”

“Well, now you know,” you smile. Bucky lets out a moan.

“What the fuck…” he groans, his head still between his legs. “I married Steve’s cousin… what the fuck…”

“Don’t forget you got her pregnant too,” adds Johnny, and Bucky has to go back to taking deep breaths before he passes out. You glare at your brother and waddle over to your panicking husband to try and help calm him down.

“It’s okay Bucky, you didn’t know. Hell, I didn’t know we were related until a couple weeks ago when I was given some old paperwork that had been pushed to the side and forgot about.”

“... At least there was some family at our wedding,” Bucky says after a while. You smile.

“Yeah, I guess there was.” Steve scoots closer to Bucky and claps him on the back.

“Welcome to the family, Buck,” he chuckles. Your husband just groans and buries his face in your neck as he wraps his arms around your middle, vowing never to let go.

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