#can we enjoy shit in peace its not real

[shrimpalbuspotter]

Trying to scroll through snape tiktoks without getting "stan bambi" or a paragraph comment on why Snape is horrible. Like I don't give a fuck if he's horrible I'm trying to live my life! Please look at your favs before speaking

[rottenpumpkin13]

Out Of Context Shit Heard On The SOLDIER Floor #7

Genesis: SEPHIROTH, STOP MEOWING AT ME.

Kunsel: Any loser twink can be a fem-boy, but it takes a real badass to be a fem-man.

Sephiroth: Did I "yee-haw" with joy, or did it convey depression?

Zack, holding up Cloud: BEHOLD.

Sephiroth, stealing a fry from Angeal's plate: A most generous offering. You will be spared. Angeal: FROM? Sephiroth: You will be spared.

Genesis, wearing sunglasses and holding a cappuccino: So there I was, gelato on my breasts—

Cloud: Aww, that's such a cute Halloween decoration. *pointing at Genesis sobbing in the corner*

Angeal: Who put a hotdog in the candy bowl?? Zack, in the background: Halloweenie.

Sephiroth: I could've sworn "motherfucker" was a compliment.

Angeal: IF YOU EAT THAT WEEK-OLD SUSHI PLATTER, YOUR INTESTINES WILL BECOME RADIOACTIVE.

Sephiroth: Zack, can I enjoy this steak dinner without you explaining A/B/O to me?

Lazard: I think we ALL need to beat our fathers with shovels, Sephiroth, you're not special.

Zack: NO! THAT'S MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT BANANA!

Genesis: He manspreads to assert dominance, I manspread to create a barrier between myself and heteronormativity. We are not the same.

Sephiroth: I just sent Angeal an email describing my feelings for him. If he doesn't reply, I'll show up at his apartment and superglue myself to the door.

Zack: Give me a pen, paper, and three Adderall, and I'll write something better than Loveless in one hour.

Kunsel: Everyone is subjected to failure, but at least I'm not Roche, who thought the plural of ninja was ninji.

Sephiroth: I have exactly three crayons on my person right now, and they're all stolen from Zack.

Angeal, chewing with his mouth full: Don't make psycho-sexual comments in front of my cheeseburger.

Zack, narrating what he's seeing: 🎶 Look at Angeal 🎶 beating Sephiroth with a frozen chicken because he forgot to take it out the freezer. 🎶

Sephiroth: Please refrain from analyzing my deep-seated fear of abandonment linked to my mother's absence and its impact on my emotional regulation, it's seven in the morning and I still haven't had coffee.

Cloud: I'm about two mental breakdowns away from resorting to gang affiliation.

Genesis: COUNTER SPELL! *flicks his wrist* TRAUMA!

Roche: I often have nightmares about Sephiroth attacking me with a spork.

Sephiroth, in the presence of a spider: I feel anti-at peace.

Zack: Dear diary, today I committed tax evasion, and felt great. Tomorrow I'll try embezzlement and eventually vandalism!

Sephiroth: Can you read this death threat note and check if my handwriting is recognizable?

Zack and Genesis: *Loudly arguing over who gets to be the ring bearer at Sephiroth and Angeal's wedding*

Angeal, laying on the floor: Good luck trying to find my will to live, gang.

Genesis: I'm flashing you a tit to maintain our friendship.

Sephiroth: If I had a gil for every time someone compared me to a cat, I'd have enough to purchase that expensive human cat bed that has been on my wishlist for ages.

Roche: Is my discount wig a joke to you, Zackary?

Cloud, placing an "I miss you" letter from his mother in Sephiroth's line of view: Yeah, that's right. Fuck you.

Lazard: Someone pinned a death threat on my office door written in glitter gel pen.

Genesis, flirting: I own an air-fryer.

Angeal: T-shirt that says "I survived Zack's power point presentation on aliens that included a photo of Sephiroth on the fourth slide"

Roche: Cloud Strife's evil twin…Grass Peace.

Sephiroth: *Showing Zack pictures of baby cows while Zack sobs into his burger*

Genesis: PUT. MASAMUNE. DOWN. No one is stealing your crayons.

Sephiroth: Genesis, I feel inspired to compliment your ass.

Lazard: Take a good, hard look at Sephiroth wearing flip-flops and tell me I shouldn't be stressed.

Sephiroth: A most efficient weapon to add to my arsenal *wielding an entire streetlamp*

Zack, talking to Angeal: My insecure trooper and faceless info guy, versus your 6'7 cat and walking red flag.

Kunsel: Is the cure to male loneliness *incomprehensible screeching* ?

[pookietv]

manager to missus | arthurtv

little social media au! arthur tv drabbly thing

first post! enjoy, sorry if it's a bit shit :3

liked by arthurtv, chrismd and 17,073 more

yourusername: turns out not being in london all the time isn't so bad, can actually see some stars in the sky

gkbarry: come back to london, i miss u x

↳ yourusername: i miss u more, ready for the podcast when you are

georgeclarkey: never thought i'd say this but please come back, chris cannot do anything without you sorting it out

↳ yourusername: afraid to tell you you will be stuck with chris for a little longer, suck it up

arthurtv: hope you're having a good time!

↳ yourusername: thanks arthur! will have to catch up when i'm back :)

↳ georgeclarkey: @/yourusername how come you're nice to him and i get told to suck it up ??

↳ yourusername: @/georgeclarkey thats because i like arthur more then you, glad we cleared that up x

chrismd10: slacking from work, typical

↳ yourusername: if you had to work with you, you would slack too x

liked by georgeclarkey, arthur tv and 23,803 more

yourusername: if i have to go to one more cold place for the sake of filming i fear i may actually kill one of the boys

faithlouisak: kill ethan if you want, i might get some peace then x

↳ yourusername: on it, i think i was debating it after he flashed his arse at the camera anyways x

maxbaledge: don't come back with them, life without george has been incredible x

↳ yourusername: i will try my best x

chrismd10: you have to admit i was the least annoying this time

↳ yourusername: i fear you are incorrect, you were easily the most annoying

↳ chrismd10: what ?? propaganda going on here

↳ yourusername: you literally almost smashed me in the face with a football

↳ chrismd10: was just trying to fix your face for you

↳ yourusername: and you say you're not annoying??

arthurtv: i am with you on this i do not want to be cold any longer

↳ yourusername: we should unionise against chris together x

↳ arthurtv: time and place and i'll be there

liked by arthurtv, bambinobecky and 25,930 more

yourusername: so apparently i'm twenty four now, not a big fan, feeling quite old. at least i got to get very smashed to ignore it! ps, thank you everyone for coming <3

bambinobecky: glad u had a good night, was so lovely to see you x

↳ yourusername: absolutely, you too! glad you were there to neck pints with me in solidarity x

↳ bambinobecky: anytime, what i was built for x

chrismd10: i will forever hate you for guilt tripping me into doing all those shots just because it was your birthday

↳ yourusername: don't lie, you loved it

arthurtv: couldn't have missed it, drunk y/n is one of the best things out there

↳ yourusername: glad to be of service

arthurtv: also the first photo is very pretty

↳ yourusername: going to make me blush mr television

↳ arthurtv: sorry but not

gkbarry: picking you up from the bottom of your own stairs after tumbling down them was a real bonding experience x

↳ yourusername: stop outing me on the main, i'm trying (and failing) to be classy x

georgeclarkey: glad you had a good night!

↳ yourusername: crazy that you're only nice to me when its my birthday

liked by arthurtv, georgeclarkey and 24,903 more. tagged, arthurtv

yourusername: well.. cats out of the bag ?

arthurtv: surprised it didn't come out sooner with chris' fat mouth

↳ chrismd10: hey i hid it for a while ! was getting bored

liked by bambinobecky, arthurhill and 32,048 more tagged, yourusername

arthurtv: to those who said i'd never go anywhere in life, i got a hot gf so

yourusername: clearly your biggest accomplishment

↳ arthurtv: too real it hurts

[1moreff-creator]

Do you have any Teruvid headcanons??? If so... *Grabby hands* 🥺👉👈

Hey! Man, Teruvid, huh? Well, I have to be honest and say I don’t know if I fully grasp what the dynamic would be like, but I’ll see what I can do! Non-despair AU as always, just to keep consistency with my other ship posts :v Or, perhaps a better term would be "non-killing game AU"; it's hard to imagine Teruvid without despair lmao.

CW: Toxic relationship, gaslighting.

How this relationship would start is hard to imagine, really. Especially outside the stress of the killing game. Teruko never believed David’s cheery persona was real, so she didn’t like the guy from the start.

However, outside of the killing game, David wouldn’t be actively trying to kill anyone, and Xander and Teruko would probably still be friends, so it actually works out better than expected. Presumably, the way this works outside the killing game is that David eventually realizes Teruko doesn’t believe his façade and chooses to start dropping it around her, eventually enjoying her company just because he doesn’t have to keep up a tiring act. Teruko doesn’t like him at first, so I imagine it would be David confessing. Something like, uh...

David: We both know no one will ever love us the way we are. And we won’t love each other either, and this is going to end horribly.  Teruko: Then why the hell are you even asking? David: It’s for your benefit, you know. More than anyone else, you must be well aware your luck will ruin any relationship you ever have. Teruko: … David (fake smiling, stars in eyes): But most of them will try to be optimistic, won’t they? Thinking themselves above your luck, wishing that if they just try hard enough, this time, it will work out. How hopeful~. Teruko: … And? David (smirking): And that just means it will hurt them all the worse when it all comes crashing down. And you'll feel even more miserable after all's said and done than you did in the first place. That wouldn't happen with me. Not that I'll let you, but you wouldn't care if you hurt me anyways.

Yeah I can’t see this relationship being healthy in any way lmao.

Like, they hate each other even together, that’s the Vision of Teruvid shippers right? They would both be miserable the entire time it’s happening, since they both reinforce the worst and most damaging views the other holds. If the Ultimate Inspirational Speaker can’t even inspire himself to think things can get better, then Teruko has no reason to believe they will. And if Teruko never tries to change despite hating her life, then that confirms to David that people can’t change. The relationship is held together by the illusory comfort of confirmation bias; neither has to challenge their worldviews like they would in a relationship that genuinely made them happy, so they feel at peace in their shared misery.

Speaking of, the most common intimate interaction is venting to each other about whatever bullshit they got going on, be it unfortunate events or Speaker business annoyance. Now, neither is particularly good at giving comfort, but they’re also both bad at receiving it (they don’t understand the concept that people can feel genuine affection towards them, of course), so they settle on just… not comforting each other. Just a simple “sucks” after a long rant, or even laughing at each other’s misery, but again, illusory comfort in being able to vent out their issues without having someone actually worry and care for them, because they don’t know how to handle that.

Other than that, lots of just cuddling while doing random shit. They’re both horrendously touch starved, so they never stay physically apart if possible.

That said, though, they’re not very public with their relationship. Obviously; if Teruko never seemed to like David, then they’re suddenly together, that’s gonna raise a few eyebrows. And David still tries to keep up the Speaker persona outside his one on one interactions with Teruko, a persona that Teruko dislikes due to its disingenuity, so they never really hang out in the presence of others.

Their closest friends know, except none of them actually realize that David’s persona is a lie. They think they’re keeping it quiet not to attract attention to Teruko, given David is a public figure and all. Because of that, they actually think they’re good for each other, thinking that David’s optimism and Teruko’s pessimism balance out to be pretty functional. This fundamental misunderstanding of their relationship makes David and Teruko both feel even more alienated from their friends, which feeds into the codependency. They need each other, because they’re the only ones that get it.

Indeed, this is a serious “they would make each other so much worse” situation, I can’t see Teruvid in any other way. Unless they both get some serious therapy, and even then, the way I’ve described the relationship, it would fall apart if either of them were any more stable. So, uh, yeah.

I kinda struggle to come up with much more than this for these two, so I hope that was okay! Thanks for the ask!

[writingonleaves]

how can you look so peaceful when you know i'm gonna leave - joseph woll

pairing: joseph woll x original female character

warnings: swearing, fluff central, talks of marriage, barely proofread

inspired by + title: "staying" by lizzy mcalpine

word count: 2.1k

author's note: a short love letter to long distance relationships, which, while brutal, are beautiful in its own way. a love so soft that its meaning transcends distance ... it's possible folks! i've lived it! wanted to put something quick out to get back into my writer brain again. i hope you all enjoy this one <3

Goodbyes are par for the course for Evangeline Patel and Joseph Woll. 

Their first real one was when they weren’t even dating yet. Something more than friends. Something just below commitment. It was after their sophomore year of Boston College, when Joseph went back home to St. Louis and Evie went back home to New York. Evie hadn’t wanted to let go as Joseph lingered by the door, having helped her pack stuff into her car. 

They were dating a year later during the second real goodbye, when Joseph’s BC season ended and he went to Toronto. But that time they had plans of visiting each other’s hometowns in the summer and the goodbyes felt more like promises and not finalities. 

When two collegiate hockey players date each other, they get more comfortable being apart than together with opposing practice and game schedules. But everyone knew, even at the start, that Evie and Joseph wouldn’t ever be driven apart by distance. 

And that stayed true through every ‘goodbye’ and ‘see you soon,’ whether literal or figurative. Through when shoulder surgery sidelined Evie and her dreams to go professional. Through when Joseph signed his deal with Toronto and Evie stayed at BC. Through when Evie’s post-grad journey took her back home to New York. 

They’ve passed every test thrown at them, every obstacle tossed in their way. As heartbreaking as it sounds, goodbyes are a part of what makes Evie and Joseph work. 

Because when they finally say hello again, it always feels like the first time they locked eyes, during a meeting during their freshman year when all the student athletes were gathering together.

Tonight, after spending their sixth year anniversary, they’re on the precipice of another goodbye. Joseph has to go back to Toronto for training camp and the Leafs don’t play the Rangers until late January. Evie always spends the holidays with her family, and Joseph has always respected that. 

Four months. They’ve done worse. But the familiar heaviness settles in her stomach as she curls up in bed, reaching out to place a stray hair back where it belongs. He looks at her in a way that makes her feel like nothing and no one can hurt her. 

It’s been that way for six years and she’s so lucky.

He narrows his eyes playfully, tapping his pointer finger gently on her forehead. “What are you thinking so hard about?”

Evie sighs with a wistful smile. “Nothing.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah.”

He leans forward to press a kiss on her forehead. “I know you’re lying. Tell me.”

She relents, “I love you.”

“I love you too, baby. That’s what you’re thinking about?”

She shrugs. “Do you ever think about what life would be like if we didn’t have to be apart so much?”

“All the time,” he says. “I probably wouldn’t be as upset coming home after a loss.”

Evie chuckles, but that’s not what she means. “I mean, like, I don’t know. If you had thought about breaking it off when you went to Toronto or when I went to New York or…”

Joseph’s eyebrows furrow. “Is there something you’re not telling me?”

Shit. “No, no! Not at all. Sorry. I probably should’ve brought that up more gracefully.”

He grins. “That’s okay. You rarely think before you speak. I know that.” He earns a light slap for that. “But to answer your question, no. Not really. Even among all the uncertainties of going to Toronto, you were always the constant. I knew that no matter what changes would come, I’d always want and need you to be in my life.”

She feels her heart rush with emotions. Even after six years, he can still make her feel like a lovesick idiot. “How did you know that early on?”

He rubs her shoulder with his thumb. “You make my brain calm down. Even on our first date, my hands were so sweaty and I didn’t know if you were gonna think dinner was too cheesy but you just made me feel so at peace.”

“It was cheesy,” she points out as he lightly pinches her skin in retaliation, which makes her laugh. “But it was you. So I didn’t care.”

“Talk about cheesy,” he snickers. “But yeah. I never had a doubt. I knew that even though it was very likely we wouldn’t live in the same city, it would be worth it. It was more if you wanted it.”

“What do you mean?”

He swallows. She plays with his fingers, something that always calms him down. “Well, when I first went to Toronto, I wasn’t sure if you’d want to, you know, keep this going. And I would’ve understood. You were gonna be at BC another year and then be who knows where and I could’ve moved around at any moment. Not being able to give you that stability…it’s still something I worry about.”

“I think we’ve made it work this long,” she says playfully. 

“We have, and I wouldn’t change it for anything,” he assures. “And usually, I’m fine. But, you know, on the days I miss you more than usual, the thought creeps into my head.”

She catches his hand that’s been rubbing her shoulder and places a kiss on his palm. “Honey, I appreciate the concern, I really do. But I knew what I was getting to. And I’m still here, aren’t I?”

“I feel very lucky that you are.”

Sap. Evie lays back down on his chest. “That still doesn’t mean this gets easier though.”

“Yeah. I know.”

She glances around the room, stopping at momentos she’s collected throughout the years. The BC flag she has hanging above her door. The puck for the first goal she ever scored for the Eagles on the corner of her desk. A stuffed elephant Joseph won her in an arcade four years ago. A cork board filled with scraps of memories, tickets to concerts, boarding passes and little notes she’s gotten from friends and family. 

Right in the center is a ticket to Joseph’s first game in net for the Leafs. November 13, 2021. She’ll never forget it, getting special permission from her coach to meet the team at New Hampshire the next day for their game so that she could go up to Buffalo to catch the Leafs play the Sabres. 

Her eyes then scan to the bouquet of lilies on her night stand, courtesy of Joseph from when they stopped by a flower shop yesterday. Then to the duvet that he had gifted her for her birthday last year because she needed a new one. 

And then finally, to him. Those blue eyes that always hold so much warmth. The eyes she immediately saw when she woke up from her surgery, a professional hockey career officially out of reach. The eyes she always looks for in a room, whether he’s there or not. 

“Hi,” he says softly.

“Hm?”

“Lost you for a minute.”

“Sorry,” she shakes her head. “Were you saying something?”

“Nah,” he says with a smile, kissing her forehead. “Four months isn’t too bad.”

“Joseph,” she deadpans. “It’s not great either.”

“I know,” he murmurs. “I’m just trying not to be sad about it now because I know it’s inevitable. You think it would get easier after six years.”

“I hope some of the Toronto jobs I applied to get back to me.”

He sighs and she can’t blame him. It’s a conversation they’ve had multiple times. “Me too, Eve. But-”

“Go where the job you want takes you, yeah, I know,” she finishes for him. “But I’m ready for a change. And I miss living in the same city. Or country. Even that’s a start.”

Joseph snorts. “Yeah. That would be nice.” He reaches over to dim the lights. “Well, if anything, I’m glad we get to at least spend anniversaries together.”

She hums. They miss out on a lot in each other’s lives — her birthday which is in March, various holidays, Valentine’s Day — but anniversaries are in the summer. And that can be theirs. 

Sometimes Evie does wonder what life would be like if they weren’t dating. If she hadn’t taken the chance and asked for the shy, cute boy’s number. If she hadn’t realized at a BC men’s hockey game that the goalie in net was so talented that she couldn’t take her eyes away. If she hadn’t said yes to going on the first date. By then she had already known he was on his way to Toronto sooner rather than later. And she still said yes. 

She went to her childhood best friend’s older sister’s wedding a month ago. Her and Joseph have talked about marriage — they’ve been dating for so long it would be strange if they hadn’t — but it wasn’t until Paige and Taylor were saying “I Do” as they put rings on each other’s fingers, Paige’s jumpsuit and Taylor’s dress flowing gracefully with the wind, did Evie look at her own ring finger for a split second and yearn for something for the first time. 

Well, he’s leaving tomorrow. Might as well bring it up now. 

“You know, if we want to get married eventually, we probably should be in the same city.” She holds her breath, waiting for his reaction, fiddling with her necklace. 

(It’s a silver maple leaf charm that Joseph had gotten her right before he left for Toronto. Evie hasn’t taken it off since.)

“You’re my favorite person in the world.” He rushes out, almost like he’s stumbling over his words. But they’re no less genuine, eyes wide and cheeks the slightest bit red. She loves all of him, but she loves him the most like this. When he’s completely vulnerable, no filter and only hers. 

She has to share him with a whole city who lives and breathes hockey. He does a good job of reminding her consistently that even with all that, what’s theirs is theirs and always will be. It’s moments like these when she remembers. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. And I also know you very well,” He taps his finger on her forehead. “Just be patient, baby. It’s coming.”

She decides to act dumb, hoping she’s not clamming up. “What’s coming?”

Joseph snorts. “Yeah, nice try.” He takes it a step further, taking her left hand and rubbing her ring finger smoothly. “I knew I wanted to marry you the second your eyes opened after your surgery.”

Evie’s not sure what to be shocked at first. The fact that he immediately picked up on her signals or what he just said. She blinks. Surgery. Her shoulder surgery. Which was-

“That was like, five years ago.”

He shrugs before taking a deep breath, and she knows he’s also thinking back to that time. She didn’t know it at the time, but they’ve talked about it since. Joseph had been downright terrified, sitting in the waiting room for hours while Evie was in the operating room. He had flown to New York specifically to be by her side when she woke up. They hadn’t even been dating for a year and a half at that point, and he still says it was one of the scariest moments of his life. 

“Why then?” She asks. She has to know. 

He smiles softly. “I know it was stupid, and the success rate of that surgery is so high, but I was so, so afraid you wouldn’t wake up or it wouldn’t be successful. Then when you woke up and I saw your eyes, I realized that I don’t think I could go through my life without seeing those eyes. I guess it’s kinda cruel that I don’t literally get to everyday, but you know what I mean.”

“Oh,” she mutters. Because what else can she say? “So you do want to get married.”

A pause, then a bark of laughter. “Of course I want to get married.” She must flinch because Joseph immediately softens. “Sorry, babe. I’m not making fun of you. I just-I thought you knew. I’ve wanted to marry you for a long time. We’re just, you know, we’re young and I knew neither one of us wanted to be married young even though we could’ve been by now.”

Evie bites her lip. “You know that I don't need a ring, right?”

“I know,” he says with a warm smile. “But you’re getting one anyways. Soon. I promise. Can’t let you slip away that easy, eh?”

“First of all, I know you play there, but you’re not Canadian so stop with the ‘eh,’ he snorts before she continues. “Secondly, you kinda have had me for awhile now. Don’t think I could slip away even if I wanted to.”

He laughs before turning serious, placing a soft but poignant kiss on her lips. “I love you. I’ll miss you.”

“I love you too,” Evie says, biting her lip as she wipes a tear from his cheek. “I miss you always.”

(Three months later, Joseph proposes during sunset in Boston, echoing to their very first date when they had dinner and walked by the Charles River during sunset. Five months later, Evie gets a job offer in Toronto.)

~*~*~

tag list: @ru-kru, @bunbunbl0gs (lemme know if you wanna be added!)

[catchyhuh]

CAMPINGG YAAAY

everyone look at this image and imagine a beautiful world with me

lupin:

the first to suggest it and the worst at it. there’s a difference between “we HAVE to camp for a few nights” and “we should TOTALLY camp out you guys!!” so sure, he can survive it easily… if it’s framed as a necessity. but when its supposed to be a fun thing, ehhhh

getting all the shit together, finding a safe enough spot to set up, struggling through dinner and how to get rid of the trash right AND how to pitch the tent…

it’s the little things that keep drawing him back to it though. he hates working with the tent, but after the initial wave of irritation, he thinks back on the others laughing before asking if he needs some backup there and he’s like. yeah that was probably funny. he loves the sound of a forest at night too-- usually he can’t sleep when it’s too quiet, but with the trees rustling and bugs chirping and all that, it’s a nice, consistent sound machine. so he tends to forget how grouchy he got last time they went all because he starts thinking about when they all laid down and just stared up at the sky for nearly an hour

jigen:

bitch is like a cockroach he can easily survive any conditions at all. but that doesn’t mean he isn’t complaining

despite his. jigenness, he’s probably the one that gets the most actual enjoyment out of it. every other vacation they could take kind of still feels like a job, in his head. he can’t fully, totally relax in some luxury hotel, even if he enjoys it, because subconsciously, his brain is figuring out where the cameras are, the quickest route back to the car from their room, etc etc. camping is different just because it's SO isolated, it's SO different from anything else. so when he pulls his hat over his face and leans back in a beach chair they took from some resort in miami, he actually does feel totally at peace

unfortunately though as the guy who specializes in taking apart and putting back together doohickeys (read: giant real life fucking guns) he always ends up being the guy to read the manual and go “guys its a solar powered lantern. there is no switch. you just let it sit in the-- you keep it in the box this WHOLE TIME?”

fujiko:

also has a bit of that jigen thing where she feels like she can actually, completely and totally relax like this. you’d expect her to be the fussy type with camping but-- no. she’s not sleeping in the damn tent if she can help it, but getting a camper and just enjoying their little opening in the forest is pretty sweet. fujiko (and this is the case for a lot of things) is really the main one who truly understands her own limits and just Doesn’t Care beyond that. who gives a shit if its “real camping.” she’s having a good time

secretly kinda loves packing for these things and imagining all kinds of one off freak scenarios that would happen to justify needing some of this shit. “be sure to bring the flashlight in case somebody has to piss in the middle of the night” bullshit. “be sure to bring the flashlight in case we find a cave with a huge mouth that somehow leads to a long forgotten crypt” NOOOW you’re talkin!! it’s all about the essentials-- sunscreen, long socks, backup snacks, and, of course, the cursed amulet that’s SO cursed it’ll just ward off anything else that tries to fuck with them. nobody handles it like fujicakes

despite all this she’s not often one to suggest camping because she, uh. kinda forgets how much she enjoys it until it’s like, actively happening. she’s like you guys WANNA camp….?? really? and then the minute they arrive she gets all smiley and happy about being so close to a lake and seeing all the frogs and stuff like she’s a little kid in science class

goemon:

goemon uh. kinda does this all the time. just for himself. they’ll be in a nice hideout and if its isolated enough to the point passerby won’t look up and go “is that fucking goemon ishikawa the thirteenth chilling on the roof” well. yeah he chills on the roof. you know he loves that

but when they actually go CAMPING camping, he tends to go in a bit too much. like, he won’t use the little portable stove, gets downright offended if he’s offered bug spray, sometimes he gets so stubborn he’ll insist he doesn’t even need a tent! 

when it’s all said and done he almost subtly picks fun at the others for so obviously not being the type of people to enjoy camping like normal humans do. he’s seen 7yos with more survival instincts. uh ignore the fact that he stayed outside of the tent on a cold night because he was “strengthening” himself and he got like suuuper sick ignore that f

zenigata:

ALL IN OR NOT AT ALL PUSSY!! if you want neat, easy camping GO GET A CABIN! this is all about the CHALLENGE baby this is all about ROUGHIN IT!! no hate if you arent cut out for it but… heh… maybe consider a cozier vacation next time. we’re cooking shit over a campfire here we’re preparing to fight entire goddamn bears if necessary THIS IS THE BEAUTY OF NATURE! THIS IS TOUGH GUY TIME!!!!

he didn’t sleep at all last night because he set up his sleeping bag wrong and the tent collapsed on him at 4 am. don’t worry though the others only laughed at him for twenty minutes before helping him out of his nylon prison

so yeah, if its a necessity, he doesn’t have a problem with it at all. but if you frame it as a special trip, good fucking god help you. he says he loves it! and maybe he does a little bit, buuut he. tends to get a bit overzealous. like immediately. like as soon as they arrive he gets all serious about trees n shit, and then just 8 hours in he’s bundled up in one of fujiko’s gigantic velvety blankets by the fire like “snnf… pass me the trail mix.” he eats all the reese’s pieces out of it. they hate him so much

[fullmetal-scar-simping]

Remember that scene where Heinkel implores Alphonse to use the Philosopher’s Stone against Pride, arguing the souls within it would want him to fight?

That should’ve been Scar and his mentor. Those are Ishvalan lives, and while Heinkel at least wasn’t involved in the genocide and has also been dehumanized and experimented on by the system, he’s still a white man and a former soldier, imploring a white boy to use these resources to save Amestris.

Idk I think it’d be soooo much more compelling if Scar’s mentor went from being skeptical of his violence to recognizing the need. To see him remind Scar that he’s ultimately committing an alchemical taboo anyway for the sake of his fellow Ishvalans. Something about Ishvalan souls reclaiming actual agency via the mentor being a fellow Ishvalan himself, acknowledging they would likely want Scar to use them.

And not to protect Amestris, but to protect the Ishvalan refugees within the circle. That isn’t talked about enough, if at all; Scar says he’ll save this country so he can change it (so he can save his people) but what about the fact that we’ve already seen two communities within the border of the circle?

What about him doing this to prevent the remaining Ishvalans from being sacrificed into a Philosopher’s Stone, and how the lives of a prior stone would feel the same way? What about Scar recognizing that the Promised Day transmutation circle was what his people were slaughtered for, and so he won’t let anymore die in direct fulfillment of it?

And then when Scar is mortally stabbed by Wrath, whose mindless violence is contrasted with Scar’s meaningful, justified violence, he actually gets to use the stone to save his own life and live and heal. Because these Ishvalans would give up their lives to save their kinsmen. That’s exactly what Scar is doing. It would give them peace to reclaim their objectification as energy that is instead used to prevent further harm to their community. All while giving their souls peace by freeing them.

At least it’s not a white doctor who created this specific stone from their lives speaking on their behalf to a war criminal who’s killed more Ishvalans than anyone else, saying that Mustang needs to heal his eyes and ultimately use these souls for the good of the remaining Ishvalans so if you think about it this is what these Ishvalan souls would REALLY want. Because there’s no way Mustang could possibly give reparations to the Ishvalan community as a blind man who is still wealthy and with connections to the new Fuhrer (reminder that state alchemist payrolls are huge and there’s multiple jokes about this too).

Man I wish instead of Father talking hot shit about how life is unfair in a neutered take on Dante’s Equivalent Exchange is Bullshit speech, with Ed rebuking him, Father did the opposite; Contrasting Dante’s speech by suggesting this ‘injustice’ of Roy losing his sight IS the rightful toll for his genocide. Maybe even insinuating that Hughes’ murder was also justice, too, ever think about that human? Both villains in either version of the story having different takes on whether equivalent exchange is real, yet ultimately using it to deliver the same brutal wake-up call to our MC.

If this had been what Brotherhood served instead of the hot garbage that is its actual canon I'd have been over the moon. (Would still dislike a lot of other things, but at least I'd be able to say I enjoyed it enough to not want to launch it into the sun.) Seriously, I love this take on the last chunk of mangahood.

We were absolutely robbed of any opportunity for a dialogue between Scar, his Master, living Ishvalans, and the souls that comprise that particular stone. How that could have eventually led his Master to rigorously challenge both Scar's and his own clashing spiritual, culture-honouring, and political philosophies. Perhaps have some other monks of Ishvala (is there a specific way to refer to practitioners of the Ishvalan faith?) bring up their own shift in perspectives, some agreeing with the methods of rebel fighters and Scar's tactics. And contrast these opinions with those who are resistant to adapting their beliefs and goals (because of course some will not budge). The dissonance between passivity feigning as tradition, leaving Ishvalans at the mercy of Amestris and other powerful nations for the foreseeable future; versus an active stance of principled violence and land reclamation, that seeks to give Ishvalans a fighting chance against full annihilation/unending displacement/amalgamation. Coming to a head with the Master imploring Scar to use it as needed, in a form of restitution and ceremony that finally grants the dead to peace.

And man, how that would enhance Scar's battle against Bradley. (What you wrote about how this could change that showdown, and what that would mean for the transmuted Ishvalans, Scar, and his people-!!!! 🥹) That he has to allow his own people to heal him, while reminded that Ishvalans are actually in his corner. That he isn't doing this for Amestris, that countering Father's nation-wide circle is to protect surviving Ishvalans. Having the knowledge that if he is forgiven and cared for by his own people, then salvation need not come from prostrating himself to Amestris whatsoever.

All of this would of course require Scar to have never fully reneged on his own actions against the State, even after being cornered into agreeing to aid the military insurrectionists. Some part of him cannot swallow their chauvinistic idealism that still centers the protection of the existing imperial nation. Slowly returning to a rejection of this rickety compliance with the military writ large. And you wouldn't necessarily have to retcon the fuck-awful Briggs recuperation of Scar either. It just can't go from the canon bs "Woah yeah, being an Ishvalan ~changing minds~ in the military is so based, unlike me, who is shitbad," to a sudden "We need violence to upend Amestrian domination of our people". Some part of him, even with his coerced comradery, would have to be internally rejecting that premise, and increasingly so. Without that, the change wouldn't scan imo.

Scar and his Master actually tearing into the meat of Scar's and his brother's blasphemy; what Scar has seen in his path of vengeance, as well as what he's seen/overheads regarding the attitudes of the military members who wish to overthrow Bradley, with their obvious bid for self-serving power rather than seeing Ishvalans and other occupied peoples as anything more than bartering chips; the will of the transmuted Ishvalans pushing through the stone just enough to rally their wishes for liberation of their living kinsmen; Scar and his Master having to reevaluate some of their long held beliefs and their distaste for all forms of alchemy. Hell, getting to see Scar admit to his Master what his brother had been studying and what he discovered in the process when he was recruiting Ishvalan refugees for the coup effort would have been a huge character moment for them both!

We could have had it all.

Rip to what could have been, but bless those few fans with taste and the wide range of changes/ideas you all have shared so far! You guys make talking about mangahood far more enjoyable than it has any right to be.

With the Ishvalan stone, I wouldn't be surprised if Scar would have to reclaim it out of Amestrian possession secretly. Maybe, without yet fully tapping into the unheard voices of their souls, he could feel them resonate and rejoice being in Ishvalan hands. The weeping of the damned who cannot bare to be used by Amestris for one second longer stirring his (re)growing suspicion and anger against the people who forced him to ally with their cause at the cost of his degradation and threat of imprisonment (and let's be real here, the threat of execution by the State was guaranteed if he rebuked Miles and therefore got arrested). He could feel their storm of memories and regrets, their hopes and their sorrows. If the stone could have called for action against the homunculi, they would just as much call for action against the human monsters as well.

But no, instead of all of that we focused on the will and humanity of the Xerxian philosopher's stone exclusively.

(Super love the military getting to exploit Scar's deep-seated self-hatred and suicidality for their own gain. Cool moment all around. Awesome. Really good stuff there. Very reformed. Checkmate, Scar.)

Everything you mentioned re: Father, his neutered approximation of Dante's speech, and what you would have preferred his perspective to be is 💯💯💯. ESPECIALLY with how he would mock Roy for having his eyesight taken in order to fulfill his own plans for yet another nation-wide sacrifice. It would serve as a biting counterargument to the nonsense excuse that Roy and friends "had no choice in joining the military and killing Ishvalans". His choices led him to desecrate so many lives for himself, to transmute as much of a (smaller) country as possible for their own goals (thus having already served Father). How would this be any different then? Mustang can argue with Truth and Father that he was forced to perform human transmutation, but why did that ever excuse anything in the past? Did clinging to the nation "betraying" Mustang's naivete ever spare any suffering for anyone? He has part of himself nonconsentually sacrificed now because of his continued pigheadedness, suffering only a fraction of what he's done. And Roy thinks he's going to make reparations for so thoroughly incinerating Ishval by vying for the Fuhrership? The very system Father and scores of humans built? This is the toll for everything foolish people like Roy have done. It's not random or unfair insofar that equivalency can merely be another way of describing consequences. Survivors might interpret Mustang's maiming as justice, so why should he resist that when he still wants to hold the power that decided their fates to begin with?

Father could have been a more cold, conniving fucker who grinds Mustang's remaining fortitude into dust. From there Roy would either have to have the greatest reckoning of his life as the eclipse fast approaches and understand that reforming what Father and his legions have created is not worth it after all, or be a husk who falls crumbles under his desperate need for a seat of power that would never be his anyway. Buuuuuuuut that would ruin the big fun shonen fuck yeah humans rock we're all best pals slapping faux-god wowowowow action scenes and alchemic-jojo punching and our protags were always right and just and super cool finale that 99% of the fanbase has been fellating since 2010. So. 💩

Total aside, but the design for Father's humanoid homunculus form (when he sheds Hohenheim's appearance for the eclipse) sucks so much ass lmao

[quantum1mmortality]

Wiggity wack yo(🍋Crewel x Fem! Reader x Sam🍋)

Real not click bait

OKAY AHHHHH so I was told by my boyfriend that tumblr is gonna think im a bot for a bit I can assure you I'm not so im offering this for peace

Okay uhm now back to the fic LOLO

♧CW!! Fem reader, fem pronouns, fem descriptions for body parts, sex with older sexy men yummy, READER IS NOT YUU!!!, reader is like staff or some shit idk make your own shit up i dont care, penis stuff, what stuff? Idk yet your guess is as good as mine, anal AND vagina sex, at the same time btw, threesome or however you spell it M/M/F, yeah you're getting them both at the same time crazy shit ik, I can take them both, what? In a fight? Who said anything about a fight? We get praised, bc my biggest kink is being loved, I love these two, im used to Ao3 im so sorry for how this is formatted, also I hella ship crewel x sam and they will be together in this fic dont you dare think they won't.

Okay so yeah the CW does have a lot of jokes in it but im nervous bc this is my first fic thats like this but it does have actual warnings btw so please read them

NOT PROOFREAD!!!

Okay now onto the fic. Enjoy, you horny goblin.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~

♧It had been two months since you came to NRC for the first time.

Crowley hired you to be a counselor for the boys in the school. He decided that having a housewarden overbolt every so often wasn't worth the trouble and they needed a shoulder to cry on. And that just so happened to be you.

Crowley had made it apparent he wanted you, telling the agency you worked with that it had something to do with "women being better at comprehending emotion." You didn't mind, the pay was generous and the students were sweet enough to make you want to stay.

You already met most of the students by now, having all the housewardens in every other day just to express their family issues was something you had to deal with. Having the vice housewardens in afterwards wasn't very pleasurable either, but you had to make do. Sometimes Crowley would come in just to see how things were going, he'd say it was to "be generous", he brought you food Sometimes too.

You found yourself getting very close to the married couple of the school, Sam and Crewel. They were very sweet to you, complementing your style when you'd come in, hang out with you during break, Crewel would even bring you snacks from Sam's shop when he had the chance. You would hang out with them a lot, and though you didn't want to admit it, you did find both of them attractive, but you would never hurt their marriage.

Every once in a while, Crewel and Sam invited you over to their house. You'd have drinks, play games, get into really deep conversations about how Crowley sucked, the things friends do.

You didn't want to admit your feelings. You didn't want to admit how you'd slightly blushing when they were being nicer than usual. You didn't want to admit how your heart would beat out of its chest when Crewel would stand behind you, snaking his hands over yours to guide them to teach you how to make a margarita. You didn't want to admit how you'd get so excited when Sam would willingly buy your favorite snacks and have Crewel deliver them to you. It wasn't worth losing two amazing friends over two simple crushes.

You had just gotten done a long day of counseling all the first years, Ace and Deuce to get their counseling together. It was just as hectic as it sounded, taking up almost 4 hours of your time with other students coming and leaving when they realized how long the wait would be. You needed a way to relax and get your mind off this job. Luckily, Crewel came into your office at the end of the day and invited you over for drinks.

This was the perfect stress reliever, hanging out with your two amazing friends and having drinks sounded perfect after a long day. Crewel quickly noticed how tired you were, your disheveled appearance quaking from the little sleep you had. He decided to schedule the meet up for later in the day so you'd get some sleep beforehand. "We don't want you falling asleep on us, now do we?" Crewel gives you a small chuckle and a wink before bidding his goodbye and leaving.

Getting up from your chair with an exhausted sigh, you pack your notes into your bag and leave your office, locking the door behind you. Crowley said to always lock your office when you aren't there, something about the students being nosy and may snoop around. It didn't matter though, it was the end of the school day and the start of the weekend, who would spend their Friday snooping around in a counselors office?

Finally getting to the chamber room and walking through the mirror, you're at the part of campus where all the staff lives. Medium sized houses in a nice circle with Treins house being the biggest and in the middle. Unlocking your front door, you sigh and take off your jacket while laying your keys down on the table next to the door. Going upstairs and into your room, you take your bra and skirt off, climbing into bed after setting an alarm.

Crewel was nice enough to set the meet up back a few hours, scheduling it for 10. Giving you a nice 4 and a half hours to catch up on much needed sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After being asleep for around 4 hours, you awoke to your alarm going off. It was 9:25, giving you 30 minutes to get ready.

Getting out of bed you hop into the shower to get washed up. Using the lovely sugar scrubs you usually do and washing your (H/L) (H/C) hair with a wonderful smelling shampoo and conditioner. Getting out of the shower, blow drying your hair and figuring out what to wear.

You finally decided on a nice (F/C) dress, not too skin tight, but leaving enough to the imagination to make it desirable. Luckily it wasn't out of the ordinary for you to wear something like this, so they wouldn't think anything of it.

It was getting to the time of leaving, so you quickly pack your things and head out. Closing the door behind you, you walk across the empty street and make it to their door. Since they lived in the same house, you would often catch them walking out early in the morning. It was convenient to say the least.

Knocking three times before the door opens with enthusiasm, you're greeted with Crewels smiling face as he greets you. He holds the door open as you walk in, taking your bag and coat off and putting them on the hangers near the door. Sam greets you from the kitchen, beckoning you to come and see him.

When you do, he has a bunch of machinery on the counter. "Sam used to be a barista before he started working here. He stopped a long time ago, but his love for coffee didn't. We decided to invest in some machinery to indulge in his hobby. Expensive, but worth it to see him happy." Crewel says as he walks behind you and gives you a smile.

"I've always loved working with coffee, the pure smell alone is enough to drive a man, me, wild. Come here, I'll show you have to work an expresso machine!" Sam says with a huge smile on his face. Something tells you alcohol isn't being involved tonight, perhaps its for the better.

Walking over to Sam he steps behind you and guides your hands to the different cups and powders to make a shot of expresso. Did Crewel and Sam always have similar ways of teaching? They aren't like this to the other staff..

After making the expresso, Sam grabs some coffee he brewed earlier. Pouring it into a mug and the expresso on top, he starts the foam art. Watching him pour the foam in different directions was almost mesmerizing, and soon enough, you had a little foam kitty! How cute!

Sam had finished his and Crewels coffee and you sat down at the coffee table with them. They were silent, more than usual. Their eyes would dart across the room, occasionally landing on you but quickly shifting focus. It seemed as though they wanted to say something, but couldn't figure out how to put it.

"Is something wrong? You guys are awfully silent tonight, I hope I didn't upset you in anyway-" you trailed off, trying to figure out what was going on.

"No, no! Its not you at all!" They both practically shouted while jumping from their chairs, spilling some coffee in the process. Grabbing some tissues and sitting down, they clean themselves up.

"Look, we've been meaning to ask you something- its just- we don't know how to exactly ask about it." Sam says, Crewel still trying to dab some coffee off of the vest hes wearing.

"We think that, maybe, we can open our marriage, but, just to you. We want to try things with you, see what we like, experiment a little." Crewel adds with flushed cheeks. He must be pretty nervous about this.

Sam takes a nervous sip of his coffee before continuing on what Crewel had just stated. "We trust you. We think that you're the only person that could be fit for this, and we're willing to help you explore that side of you. The 'nastier' side, so I've heard the kids say."

Well that was a lot to take in, a bit too much actually. You had felt your entire face heat up as you realized what they meant. A sort of rush of adrenaline creep in. Was this actually happening? You've wanted it bad since you first met them, but you never thought it would actually happen.

Sam and Crewel looked at you as you completely space out. You could feel the tension in the air, their stares getting impatient as their cheeks formed new colors you'd never seen on them.

"We completely understand if you don't want to do this, we won't force you into anyth-" Crewel chimed in after deciding the silence was too much, but was then swiftly cut off.

"I'll do it. I mean- I want to, that is. I've been wanting to, I just didn't want to make you guys uncomfortable. I mean, you're always so sweet to me, I thought we just had something platonic going on, but I had no clue you guys felt the same." You say while practically being out of breath. Pressing your thighs together as an instinct, Crewel quickly switches his gaze to a lovely house plant as his cheeks heat up more.

"Are you sure you want to do this? We'd never force you into anything, but we do want your full consent." Sam practically sighs out. Crewel is still red, but now is occasionally sparing glances at you.

"Yes, im sure. You may do whatever you please." Chuckling, you say with a smile directed to them. Sam gives you a soft smile while Crewel stands up from his chair.

"I'll get everything situated. Sam, if you want to take her into the bedroom and get her situated, that would be appreciated, I'll be in as soon as I'm done getting everything ready." Crewel says while walking out of the room, giving you both a wink on the way out.

"Alrighty then! Let's get you ready!" Sam yells while taking your hand and leading you to the bedroom. When you walk in, you take in the beautiful scenery. Large king sized bed, beautiful red curtains, their bedroom is huge! "Dont be intimidated, Crowley decided to give us extra space. He says we're his 'little gay friends.' We're not even completely gay! Wiggity wack, yo!"

You were so grateful that Sam knew how to break the silence and make you comfortable you didn't even notice he had left your side to go to one of their personal cabinets. "We had been planning this for awhile, we just didn't want to scare you away is all. Crewel and I had picked up a few sets of lingerie for you. You can try them on while we wait for him to get back! No pressure of course. I just figured you may not have expected something like this to happen and you wanted to change into something more... fitting... for the occasion."

Then, it hit you. You were wearing such normal panties, it hurt! Shame on you, shame on you!

Going to the cabinet, you skimmed through the sets of lingerie. None really caught your eye, until you landed on a lacy white two peice with pearly accents. Sexy, baby!

"Oh, you like that one? Thats Crewels favorite. Hes gonna go batshit crazy if he sees you in that! Personally I dont give a shit what you're wearing, you'll be naked and in my arms by the end of the night so it doesn't matter." He says with a smug look on his face. Was that... a threat? Why was it sexy for him to say if it was? He was leaning with his arms crossed on the cabinet, looking for any sign that you were uncomfortable. They really were putting your needs above theirs.

"Go! Try it on! I wanna see Crewels face when he comes back!" He lightly shooshes you away with a hearty laugh that made your cheeks red. After showing you to the bathroom, he leaves you to the privacy of the semi cold, hard floor room. Getting changed, you heard the door open and Crewel walk in. Sam and him were talking about something you just couldn't hear what. Putting the panties to the lingerie set on, you had realized they untied at the sides. How convenient! Stepping outside, you felt their eyes practically rip you apart.

"Hot diggity dog! I'm so sorry, that sounded so weird oh my god." Sam slaps his face before cupping his eyes in embarrassment. Crewel sent him a death glare before looking back at you with wide eyes and completely red cheeks.

"Uhm.. we should uh.. go over safety precautions. Our safeword is going to be, 'blue', understood?" Crewels voice was shaky and he was clearly avoiding your gaze, but he did sound serious. Shaking your head yes, he continues. "Alright. Remember, any time you get uncomfortable, or you want to stop, or anything, just say the safeword and we'll stop immediately. As for everything else, I got some things for us. Just to make everything a smoother process is all. Lube, vibrators, simply just things to have your body relax. As for protection, both Sam and I can't have kids. In our defense we didn't think something like this would happen."

"In short, you're gonna be fine. We'll make sure you're treated nice and good, don't worry. Crewel and I are, as the kids would say, 'freaks in the sheets', but we'll wait until later dates to actually try those things with you. If you're comfortable, that is." Sam smiles at you. It was comforting to see all the precautions they're taking.

"I'm okay with anything really, I mean, I dont have very much experience but im willing to try things out! It's just, im a bit nervous is all.." Sam looks at you as though he's seen something so otherworldly gorgeous he can't explain it, and he gently takes your hands.

"Hey, dont be scared, okay? We'll go as slow as you want, and if at anytime you want to stop we will. We just want you to have a good time." Sam winks as he gives your hands a gently squeeze of reassurance. Crewel was silently taking off his coat all the while looking at the way the lingerie was hugging your body. Blush was covering your cheeks as you take your hands out of sams grasp and cup them together in a nervous fashion.

"Thanks.. its just this outfit im wearing is starting to be a bit uncomfortable." You say while looking away from their prying eyes.

"Well let's take it off then." Crewel says with a grin on his face while making eye contact.

"Mhm. I agree. If its making you so uncomfortable we should take it off." Sam says while giving you his signature grin. He takes your hand and leads you to their shared bed, sitting you on his lap in the middle of the comfortable mattress. Crewel followed and crawled towards the two of you, while landing front of you and spreading your legs gently.

Sam slowly leans into the crook of your neck, "I'm gonna take these off, okay?" He whispers in your ear as he places the strings of your panties in his fingers. Nodding in agreement, he gives the shell of your ear a soft nip, earning a small yelp from you, making the men giggle.

He slowly takes his fingers and pulls on the drawstrings, Crewel in front of you, watching in anticipation. Shyness taking over, you instinctively shut your legs close when Sam begins to take the peice of loose fabric off.

Crewel places one hand on your inner thigh and pries them open, clicking his tongue while shaking his head in light hearted dissapointment. "Ah-ah, no hiding sweetheart, cmon, you'll be begging to be touched more by the end of the night, we have to start somewhere, dont we?" Crewels voice was laced with last, you had never heard him act like this before, but God you wanted more.

You you began to crawl up Sams lap in a stroke of nervousness, to which he only gave a soft smile at. "You'll be a good girl for Divus, wont you? You'll be so good for him, let him eat you out, right?" Sam says from behind you in a teasing tone, while Crewel waited patiently for your response. Nodding yes, Crewel dove between your legs like a starved man.

A loud moan escapes your lips from the sudden burst of pleasure, earning a chuckle from the man behind you. Placing both hands on Sam's thighs in an attempt to keep your balance, you only ended up digging your fingernails into his skin. Leaving harsh, painful nail marks on his legs, Sam groans at the sudden pain. He takes his hand, interlocking it in Crewels hair and pulling him forward so he can reach deeper parts of you. You moan loudly at Crewel being able to hit spots no one else could, and Sam takes his hand out of Crewels hair and places two fingers on your clit, making circular motions with light pressure.

With all the stimulation, it doesn't take long for you to cum, which you do with a loud moan. Crewel licks all of your juices up and swallow them in a single motion. "Delicious, as expected." He says as he softly caresses your cheek for comfort. Sam begins to rub slow circles into the flesh of your thigh, giving them light pinches every word often.

Crewel begins to unbuckle his belt with one hand, the other still stroking your cheek. "Are you alright with taking us both at the same time? Its alright if not, we can take turns if you'd like." Crewel makes eye contact with you as he asks, making you swallow hard in anxiety. As you begin to think, Sam lays his head in the crook of your neck in anticipation.

"I'm alright with taking you both at the same time, its just please be slow, im a little scared is all... this is my first time doing something like this..." you say as a small chuckle comes from them both. "Of course we'd be slow silly! You're our main priority, so we just want to make you comfortable." Sam says as he kisses your neck and slowly retreats from his resting place on your shoulder.

"I'd suggest you prepare her for... well, anal. You're alright with that, right?" Crewel asks with concern in his eyes. Now THIS was something you didn't expect tonight, but not unwelcome.

"I'm okay with it! But please, please be gentle, I've never done this before." You say as you look behind you at Sam. He gives you a smile before ruffling your hair. "I know I know, I'll be gentle I swear." He says as he begins to let his slender fingers roam to you ass. "Get ready, okay? This is gonna feel weird and possibly hurt for a minute, but it'll get better."

Taking a deep breath, you nod your head. Sam takes one finger and begins to slowly inch his way in, letting you stretch out. You slowly grown out at the alien feeling, gripping Sam's thighs harder than you were before.

He begins to curl his finger in you, slipping in another one as you start to loosen up more. Crewel could sense the way it hurt, he leaned down and started kissing and rubbing your thighs gently, hoping it would help you ease.

Sam could feel you loosen from this, to the point he was able to slip a third finger in, earning a moan from you. He began to curl his fingers upwards as he kissed and sucked on the sensitive skin of your neck. With the stimulation, you ended up cumming after a few minutes.

As Crewel lapped up your juices again, but gently this time as to not overstimulate you, Sam began to praise you more. "Look at you, doing so good for us, taking us so well. I cant wait to have you coming undone on us." Sam said as he placed a light kiss on your cheek.

Crewel took the rest of his clothes off, leaving him in just his boxers, letting you stare in awe at how well built he was. He took your hand and let you sit in his lap. "Just a second doll, Sam needs to undress himself." He says as he buries his face in the crook of your neck, placing sweet kisses on it. After a minute, Sam was done and was also in just his boxers, guiding you back onto his lap.

"Which hole ya wanna take? Rock paper scissors? No, thats too cliche.." Sam rambles on. "I'm fine with whatever, what do you want, y/n?" Crewel tags into the conversation as he scoots closer to the two of you, holding your waist in the process.

"I'm okay with the position we're in right now, with you being in the front, Sam in the back.. it seems fine like this." The men smile at how genuine you're being, voicing your concerns, ect. Its cute to them. They nod and hum in agreement as Crewel grabs a bottle of lube.

"I reckon I won't have to use this as much as you will, Sam. Take it slow, hurt her and I'll beat the shit out of you." Crewel says with a smile on his face, sort of whispering that last part.

"I am gentle! I'm always gentle, some would even call me a gentleman!" Sam says with a playful scowl, taking the bottle from him. You begin to giggle as you see Crewel slowly take off his boxers, reveling his already, very hard member.

"Sorry love, you looked too cute, couldn't help it, yknow?" He says, giving you a wink as his breath speeds up. You feel Sam shifting under you and you feel him take off his boxers, throwing them to the side.

Oh no, they're both huge! Crewels is long, around 7-8.5 with reasonable girth, while Sams is 6.5 and a lot thicker. How are you gonna take them both at once?

"I know what you're thinking, you'll be alright. We'll take it slow, build up speed with time." Sam says as he places a quick kiss on your temple. He squeezes the lube on his hand, rubbing it together to warm it up before putting it on his cock. Earning a hiss from him, he sighs and places both hands on your waist. Lifting your body up, both him and Crewel line themselves with your holes, and wait for your confirmation.

Placing both hands on Crewels shoulders, you nod your head before they begin to slowly sink themselves into you, stretching you out more in the process. Moans from all three of you fill the room as they lower you down more and more.

Once they are fully in, they both huddle close to your body, singing you praise after praise as they wait for you to let them move. After a few minutes pf being out of breath and simply just panting you give them the go ahead.

"You can move, I'm okay now." And with that, they pull their torsos away from you and place their hands on your waist. Starting at a slow pace for you to get used to it, they slowly and gradually add more speed as they both bounce you on their cocks.

Sam rests his head on your shoulder, panting in your ear as his grip on you tighten and his muscles tense. Crewel doing the same, but while bouncing you, he begins to thrust upwards when you come down to make a larger impact, earning a loud moan that makes you tense around them.

Ssm gets jealous of how Crewel seems to be fucking you better, so he starts to do the same, meeting his thrusts with your timing. You were all moaning messes and by the looks of it, none of you could last very long.

Sam grits his teeth as his hands make their way to your tits, softly squeezing and pinching them. Crewel let's his hands wander to your pussy, taking his thumb and rubbing circles on your clit. You dont last long after they begin to do this, and cum for the third time this night, riding out your high as Sam and Crewel chase theirs.

You can feel Sams breath speed up and grow more hoarse as his grip on your thighs and breast slightly tighten. "Shit shit shi-" a loud groan erupted from his chest as he spills his seed in you. Crewel falling seconds after, cumming in you as he thrusts upwards, keeping it in.

You all lay on the bed for a few seconds, basking in eachothers presence while catching your breath. Crewel slowly pulls out, earning a whince from you. He walks into the bathroom and comes back seconds later with a wash cloth.

"Cmon Sam, you gotta get out." Crewel says as he looks at him, with a whine Sam pulls out too, letting both their juices spill out of you. "Such a good girl for us, keeping all our cum in her. You did so well for us dear." Crewel says as he cleans you up. Lightly dabbing the cloth on your now sensitive areas, he softly chuckles at the way your body reacts.

Sam walks to the other side of the room, going into a small fridge and grabbing three waters and a few snacks. "I've got waters for all of us and some chocolates for the girl of the hour." He says with a wink. Crewel is done cleaning you and goes to throw the soiled towel in a wash basket as Sam opens your water and chocolates.

Replenishing your thirst and munching on the surprisingly delicious chocolates, Sam picks you up unexpectedly and moves you to the front of the bed. "What, you didn't think we were gonna kick you out after this, did you?" Crewel says chuckling as he comes back from being in the bathroom.

"Honestly, im not sure what to expect from you guys anymore." You say with a chuckle. Both men chuckle aswell as they make it into bed with you, sandwiching you between them. Shifting the pillows and blankets around until you're all comfortable, you lay in a comfortable silence.

As you all say your goodnights as the lights in the room turn off, you can't help but think of what situation you're in. Having two men who just fucked you into oblivion now cuddling you goodnight? You could get used to this.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: im lorde yaya im lorde yaya

[akingdomscrypt]

Forget-Me-Not

Part Two

Pairing : Gaz x male reader

WC : 7.35k

Summary : I warned y'all it would happen.

Warnings : referenced (minor) internalized homophobia, minor injuries, a teeny bit of panic. But that's all.

A/n : don't hate me 🧍

---"and here is how we end."---

Kyle was having a hard time focusing on the book in his lap, hardly digesting a single word on the page and far more enraptured by the warmth of your body pressed against his. Between lulls in work, when both of you had a bit of free time, you two could usually be found just outside the main building.

You're sitting on a smooth, flat stone, while Kyle rests against you. Back to your side, and his knees bent to prop a book up in his lap. The residual morning dew in the grass likely seeping into his clothes, but the heat rolling off you in waves, the peace of sitting beside you in complete silence, is worth the wet trousers later.

Sitting together while doing entirely different things—Kyle with his book, and you with that worn rubik’s cube, the colors faded and barely distinguishable now—was enough on its own for him to tolerate whatever feeling it was that made his heart beat a little faster, made his chest grow warm.

It had a likeness to adrenaline, the same sensation Kyle would get when on the chase, hunting down one target or another. This was different. You were simply sitting together, enjoying the company of one another.

“So why're you called that anyway?” You pipe up from beside him, and Kyle tears his gaze away from the book he had definitely been absorbed in. He sits up a bit straighter to get a proper look at those curious eyes.

“Hm?”

“Gaz,” you say, shifting on the little stone you are sitting on when Kyle moves away. Looking down and giving him your full attention. “Surely there's some sort of reason for it?”

“Ah,” folding the corner of the page he had been reading to mark his place, Kyle closes the book. “It's nothing special, really.”

“C'monn, it can't be as bad as mine.” you goad, and Kyle can hear the smile in your tone just as much as he can read it in your eyes.

“A'right, a'right,” Kyle relents with a soft laugh, holding his hands up in mock defense. “truthfully? It's just shorthand for my surname.”

The blank stare you give him his pure gold, and Kyle wishes he could capture that dumbfounded look on film.

Instead, he merely shrugs, “See? Told ya it was nothing special.”

“And here I was, thinkin’ it was something dramatic or some shit,” you huff, setting down the little cube you had been fidgeting with in your lap before giving him a playful shove.

Kyle simply laughs, shaking his head. “Sorry not sorry, Viper.”

“I hate you.”

“You really don't,” he says with a smug grin. “Now, it's your turn. Why do they call you viper?”

“Mm.. I don't wanna do this anymore.”

“Oi! You can't keep it from me,” Kyle protests. “I told you mine!”

“Yours was underwhelming!” You cheerfully snap right back, the mirth dancing in your gaze telling Kyle that there's no real ill intent behind it.

“Too bad! You gotta tell me now,” he returns your earlier shove, that damn smile never once leaving his face. “Besides, I think I have a pretty good idea..”

“I doubt that."

“Oh really? It has nothin’ to do with that fiery attitude of yours?” he would truthfully be pretty damn surprised if it wasn't.

“Hey- what's wrong with how I act?” You feign a pout, giving Kyle the most distraught puppy-eyes he's ever seen. The sheer amount of power you held using your eyes alone was befuddling.

“Nothin’-” he quickly reassured, patting the arm closest to him with one of his own hands. “Now, tell me!”

“Fine, fine..” you sigh. “so.. when I was first recruited, years ago, and after bootcamp, we got shipped out for our first taste of ‘real’ military life. At least that's what my lead at the time had called it.”

“Go on…” You give him a little glare and Kyle does his best to suppress his grin, which doesn't work very well, but you continue anyway.

“Got shipped out for Europe-” now, he has to cut you off then. Can't let you go on with this line of thinking, now can he?

“Wait- which part? You can't just say Europe and that's it, there are so many countries-”

“And y'all are all in the same tiny portion of land. So, Europe.” You say with a raised eyebrow.

“But-”

You cut him off again with a deadpan, “You wanna hear the story or not?”

“....”

“That's what I thought, now, as I was saying..” you continue with a dramatized sigh. “Ended up in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by way too much fuckin' grass. Was so thick, we couldn't see shit beyond surface level.”

“Following my CO’s instructions, we were squatted down at the top of a ridge. I just happened to be the most unlucky, and when I sat down..”

Kyle let out a disbelieving gasp, a hand flying up to dramatically clutch at his heart, “No..”

“Shuddup-” Kyle hears the clatter of the cube falling away, those fierce eyes turned on him as you give his shoulder a quick shove.

“I'm going to spread the word like wildfire.”

“You will not-” He barely has any time to react, tackled into the grass with a surprised yelp. Your body pressing down on him from above.

“Ah! I will- I'll tell everyone-!” Kyle struggles beneath you, grappling for the upper hand, but his laughter makes his muscles weak.

“How was I supposed to know there was a damn snake hiding there!?” You huff, trying to pin him in place, but his infectious giggles and wriggling limbs makes the task near impossible.

“Ha!”

“You are a menace, Garrick-!” You two roll around in the grass, neither having a proper hold over the other for long. All bright smiles and bubbling laughter.

“Says the man who got his ass bitten by a damn snake!” Kyle teases when he finally gets on top of you, softly panting, knees straddling your stomach, your body going limp beneath him.

The last thing he expects is to suddenly be flipped, a shocked “ack-” escaping him as he now finds himself face down in the grass. Held up by only his forearms, still shaking with silent giggles. “Okay, now this is just unfair-”

“I am going to strangle you,” your voice rumbles against his ear, and it's clear you're trying to stay firm, but the humor lacing your breathless tone is an obvious giveaway. “Your captain would surely understand-”

One of your hands comes down to loosely wrap around his throat, the other planted firmly on the ground by his head. Kyle can't take you seriously though, soft wheezes still escaping his lips.

“I'd really prefer to keep all my sergeants intact, if that's no trouble to you.” Your body freezes on top of his, all touches slipping away as you stand up.

Kyle's own humor abruptly cuts off at the sound of the familiar rumble of his captain's voice. Slowly, he turns to look up at the newcomer.

“Price, h-heyyy,” he says with a nervous chuckle, pushing himself up onto his knees. Then stumbling to his feet.

Your hand reaches out to steady him, a friendly gesture, really, but Kyle's body reflexively steps away at the last moment. A forced smile plastered on his features, pretending he doesn't see that dejected look in your eyes.

“Did ya need something, Cap’?”

Price glances between you too, and it takes everything within Kyle not to take another half step away. To distance himself from you even more.

“S’ matter ‘o fact, I do,” Price says. “Was goin' to send someone to get you, but none of them seemed to know where you rascals were.”

“Ah, about that..” Kyle rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorry, sir.

“None of that now, just wrap this up and meet me in my office in five.” With that, Price leaves, the two of you left alone together once more.

Kyle stands there, unsure what to say, or do for that matter, a few awkward moments later, before deciding on a quick, “see you ‘round then, Viper.” And walking away.

“You needed somethin’, sir?” Kyle asks once granted verbal access to Price’s office, shutting the door softly behind himself.

Price shuffles a few papers on his desk, pulling out a few and shoving others into a folder. “Just a little chat, Garrick, then you can go back to messin’ around with that friend ‘a yours.”

“We weren't-”

Price cuts him off with a, “None ‘o that now. Come on in. Sit.” And if Kyle didn't know any better, he would assume the man was annoyed with him. He did know better, though, and the slight twitch of Price’s mustache gives away that the old man found this all humorous.

Resigning not to even try to defend himself this time, Kyle sighs and walks to the chair in front of the desk. Pulling it out and seating himself, his posture far too stiff, a bit awkward.

The captain keeps it short and sweet; informing Kyle that, for the time being, they were going to sit tight at base until their teammates needed them. Ghost, Soap, and a unit of the Mexican Special Forces had apparently managed to capture a lead who knew where the stolen missiles were.

The lot of them were currently on an op to secure the second one, and the only reason he and Price weren't out there searching for more was because the captive refused to let slip where another was- or if there even was another out there.

So the two were sitting ducks once again, but Kyle found himself not minding it just as much this time. Maybe it had something to do with the companionship he had found in you, or maybe it didn't.

“I'm a bit surprised you're not more eager to get back out there,” Price says, leaning back in his chair with a brow quirked up, arms crossed over his chest. “Never known you to be the type to enjoy lingering in one place for too long.”

Kyle shrugs, “guess I'm just getting old like you, eh?”

A small huff leaves the other man, and Kyle hopes it'll all be left at that.. but when have things ever gone his way?

“That it?” Yes, that is it, it definitely has nothing to do with you and your- “Sure there ain't somethin’ holdin’ you here?”

And your.. uh, excellent.. company. Yeah. Totally not. Price had it all wrong.

“You mean somethin’ other than a guaranteed cot to sleep in and decently warm water to shower with, sir?” Kyle asks, feigning ignorance. As if he hasn't got a clue as to what his captain could be hunting at..

“All great things, I'm sure,” Price says with a slow nod, playing along with- with whatever Kyle was doing right now. What was he doing exactly?

“And I'm quite sure it has nothing ‘t do with.. one of the temporary soldiers on base currently, would it?” It's not- it isn't like there was anything.. weird or something going on between you two. It was just a friendship. A friendship that would almost certainly end the moment you packed up and had to leave.. to leave and never come back.

Why does the thought of you leaving, likely never to return, never to meet again.. no more of the inside jokes you lot have already gained in this short amount of time, no more midnight chats after a nightmare, no more hangouts in the grassy field.. why does it cause a deep ache in his chest, one Kyle swears he's never felt before?

Like something's missing. A part of himself that you've already stolen; ripped straight from his heart and tucked right away into one of those various pockets on that ridiculous outfit of yours.

“I'm ‘fraid I don't know what you mean, Cap’.” Kyle forces out, the words weighing on his tongue like lead. And, fuck him, but the sergeant has no idea why he's acting like this.

With a heavy sigh, Price uncrossed his arms and leaned forward. Resting his elbows on the hardwood of the mahogany desk and giving Kyle the most unconvinced look he's ever seen on the captain's face.

“So there will be no problems then?”

“..Of course not, sir,” he says. And maybe they both ignore his hesitation. Maybe they pretend that nothing has changed. “None at all.”

And maybe that is for the best.

Trying to find you the next day was like searching for a needle in a haystack. Worse. Trying to find a needle in a pile of more needles; if those needles were all donned in swaths of black clothing. All of these damn Shadows looked exactly the same.

Sure, Kyle could easily identify you when it was just you and maybe a few other soldiers, but this morning another group had shipped in. This one is much bigger than the one you had arrived with.

He came up empty in the morning, unable to find you in the mass of all black uniforms and visor covered faces. Giving up on the search and resolving to simply speaking up and asking one of your teammates.

The Shadows in his immediate vicinity, a small group of four, all unmasked but one, give him an odd look.

“We thought he was with you.” The one on his left says, tugging at a stubborn strap of a vest. The man paused, frowning. “Now that I think ‘bout it, I haven't seen the bastard all day.”

The Shadow just beside that one cuffed him on the back of the head, hissing something Kyle doesn't hear. “What?” He asks, looking at his teammates with a deep grimace. “Don't pretend y'all weren't thinkin’ it too.”

And this throws Kyle off his groove, unable to control the twist of his own features as he considers the implications of what the man is saying. Were you not as popular as he had assumed? Was that the reason you hung out with him so often?

Throwing in a disarming huff of laughter to settle the tension amongst the soldiers, Kyle digs deeper. “What, he not famous amongst you lot or somethin’?”

One of the other Shadows scoff, the masked one this time. “Famous? Yeah.” She deadpans, then sneers. “For all the wrong reasons.”

The woman to her left winces, but doesn't comment further. Instead, the Shadow that had reprimanded the other guy pipes up. “Yeah.. he's pretty well known for his temper, and that's about it.”

“Don't forget the fucker is also is the lieutenant’s favorite.” the woman from before speaks up again. Looking a little closer, the patch on her vest reads the numbers 2-6.

“Him and Venn both,” the first guy, 1-4, apparently, grunts. “The both of them have the poor man twisted tight around their fingers. Always agreeing to their every whim.”

The second woman finally speaks up, much more soft spoken than her loudmouthed counterparts. “C’mon guys, that's not fair. Y'know the lieutenant doesn't play favorites.”

“Shut it, Kayllee,” 2-6 snaps, albeit a bit more softer than she had been previously. “You're just sayin’ that ‘cause you've got a little crush on the big man.”

The appointed ‘Kayllee’ flushes a deep pink, whacking 2-6 lightly. “Shuddup-” she squeaks. “I do not!”

“That's not what you were saying on the flight over here…” There's a certain spark in 2-6’s green irises as she looks down at her friend. One Kyle had often seen shining between two particular teammates of his own.

And another place he outright refused to acknowledge.

Deciding to let the group continue squabbling in peace, Kyle takes his leave.

He doesn't see you that entire day.

Perhaps you're just busy. Yeah, that's it. There is no way it could have anything to do with what happened yesterday- not that anything did happen. You two had just been playing around. Like guys do; like friends do.

Kyle doesn't sleep right that night, and so what if he pretends it’s because he is too caught up worried over his teammates in Mexico?

It's just not right; that's what his grandparents always said.

Not right for relationships that weren't friendship to blossom between couples who weren't strictly man and woman. Kyle had always thought it was a bit odd that people cared so damn much about other people's lives, what did or did not happen between others.

But these two had raised him and his sisters; had taken care of the lot of them when their own parents had been deemed unfit to care for the bunch by the law.

Besides their, sometimes questionable, opinions, they had otherwise raised him and his sisters pretty damn well, in Kyle's personal opinion.

So, deep down, Kyle knew they were wrong when it came to sexuality. He had never cared much one way or another when his friends, first in school, then when he got older and enlisted, “came out” to him—aka when he saw them getting flirty with the same sex. And, of course, it existed within his own team as well.

He saw the way Ghost and Soap engaged in and off the field, and knew there was something there besides simple friendship.

Kyle didn't have a problem with it. It simply wasn't his business. Everyone could do whatever the hell they pleased, as long as no one got hurt.

Everyone.

Everyone..

Everyone. Or, well.. everyone with one exception.

..everyone besides him.

Now, Kyle liked to believe it was never an issue before. He had his fair share of crushes; whenever he brought home a friend who happened to be a girl, his grandma always gushed about how cute they would be together; his grandpa teased him about his little ‘girlfriend’.

They all laughed it off, finding his stuttering responses adorable.

Who was Kyle to tell them any differently? Sure, he never felt the urge to engage with the girls the same way his school friends always had. And ladies often preferred to hang out with him as opposed to the other guys their age- but that's just because his grandma raised him to treat everyone equally!

Even later, Kyle never had the urge to get with.. anyone, really. Women were pretty, yeah, but any attempt at starting a relationship was one-sided and would eventually end with them being better as friends.

Kyle didn't question it.

He had no reason to.

Until now.

Until he was cradling a nice, steaming cup of tea in his hands. Your eyes locked on him, gauging his reaction as he slowly brings it up and takes a sip.

It tastes.. okay? Not the best he's had, and he's pretty sure you may have microwaved the water.. but despite its imperfections, Kyle swears it's the best damn tea he's ever had.

“So..?” You urge, expectant.

“It's.. good.” He says, offering a small smile.

“Ah, shit, ya don't like it..” Your posture deflates, glancing back at ingredients left out on the communal counter space. Some sugars and a little residue of milk where you might have accidentally split a drop or two.

Kyle bites his cheek to keep from smiling like some sort of imbecile. “No, no- it's good! Really.” He says, trying to get that little spark to relight in your eye.

You give him a deadpan look, huffing. “.. I've just.. never, uh, made it before..?”

Oh, hell, now if that doesn't melt Kyle's heart into one big, sappy puddle…

“Awe, so ya did this all for little ‘ol me?” Kyle teases. “I'm honored, truly.”

He places a hand on his heart for dramatic effect, bowing slightly, other hand clutching the handle of the mug as if is we're his damn lifeline. Despite the joking tone, Kyle meant it.

It may not taste the best.. but, fuck, it was one of the- the cutest things someone had done for him yet. The sugar was there, a little splash of milk, just how he liked it.

Which meant you had paid attention to how he made it for himself.

So maybe he hadn't been completely honest before. Maybe it was time to admit to himself that the way he looked at some other men wasn't out of pure admiration. The way he looked at you.

If it was wrong, why did it feel so damn right?

The next instance that gives Kyle the same fluttery-feeling in his gut is when, after returning from one of your own wayward ops, you come to see him immediately.

The moment you step into the common room, Kyle knows something ain't right. You act just as you usually do, only this time there's a still-irritated scratch across the bridge of your nose, your clothes are rumpled, and he's on his feet faster than he can think. Abandoning the group he had been playing cards with, who all grumble their displeasure, but he brushes them off.

Kyle had more important things to handle than a silly card game.

“Viper? You a’right, mate?”

“Mhm,” you him with a little nod. “Mission success.”

“That's great, man!” He steps closer, giving your body another once over. “Have you gone to medical yet? Get checked out? Maybe get some food in ya?”

“Nah, none of that. I came to see you.” Kyle's heart stutters to a stop right then and there. It's a heavy pause before it kicks back into gear again.

He can overthink on the implications of that later, right now you need his help.

And that is how the two of you end up in his room. Again. For the second time now.

Only this time it's you who's injured. You who's sprawled out on his bed like you own the damn place, an impish sparkle in your eyes, the corners scrunched up in a way that tells Kyle you find all his fussing over you amusing.

“C’mon..” you drawl. “It ain't that serious, really. Just a few scratches.”

Kyle doesn't dignify you with a response. Instead he briskly walked to his desk and pulled out the little first aid kit he kept there.

“I mean it, Kyle,” you sigh. “It's nothing. The place we infiltrated just had a couple mutts were weren't expecting-”

Kyle flips around, kit in hand, and glares a million tiny daggers into your careless body. “How is that not serious?” He stomps over to the bed, plopping himself down beside you. “I should just send your mouthy ass down to medical.”

He taps your shirt with a few fingers—his touch gentle despite his grumbling—before pulling away to fiddle with the box. “Off.”

“Damn, take me out ‘t dinner first, at least..” whatever look he gives you must betray a bit more of his frustration than Kyle intended, if the way you put your hands up in mock surrender is any clue.

Kit open and set aside, Kyle takes it upon himself to twist his body to get a good look at you. Hands hovering just above your hips, a silent question in his eyes that you answer with a small huff and relax bodily into the thin mattress.

When he'd dreamed of taking your shirt off, it certainly wasn't like this.

Ever so slowly, Kyle pushes the fabric up, his pal just barely grazing your flanks. He stubbornly keeps his gaze locked on the skin gradually being revealed to him and not making contact with your own.

Once the cloth is bunched up just under your armpits Kyle grunts a small, “up” and pulls it off the rest of the way when you dutily follow the command. It's a good thing you had shucked off the majority of your gear upon entrance, made this shit a ton easier.

It hits Kyle right then and there that he's seeing you shirtless for the first time. Seeing more skin than just that glimpse of your eyes for that matter.

Fuck.

Now wasn't the time to marvel. To take in every inch of soft, lightly scarred flesh bared to him. It would be something right out of a damn magazine if it wasn't for the scratches and teeth marks marring your skin.

Kyle sucks in a sharp breath, but you seem as aloof as ever. “See? Told you it wasn't that bad.”

“Shut up.” He traces a few of the indentations a fairly large canine had left behind with the pad of his thumb, wincing when he sees the slight twitch your abdominal muscles give. Shit, that probably hurt.

It's out of sheer luck that the dogs hadn't been able to pierce your skin, otherwise Kyle would have a much bigger problem on his hands. Seeing as you were apparently not at all inclined to get yourself checked out.

Other than the handful of fang imprints, there's a scattering of scratches that litter your chest and belly. Nothing some antiseptic and plasters couldn't fix.

Kyle doesn't notice the trembling of his hand until you capture it in both of yours as he dabbing at the last cut, this one just above where your heart would be.

“Gaz?” He doesn't look up, instead rummaging in the first aid box with his other hand. Searching for another bandage. A tug on his wrist pulls him back to the present, body freezing.

Why did you appear so unaffected by all of this? Sure, they all came close to death every damn time they went out- hell, even on base, they were all still at risk. This shouldn't bother him, even with these pesky emotions. Complicated as they were.

It wasn't even that bad. Just like you said.

“Kyle?”

It wasn't just that you had gotten hurt that was bothering him. It wasn't too long ago when Kyle himself had been dangling out of a damn aircraft by nothing other than a flimsy rope-

Another soft tug, and Kyle finally drags his gaze to meet yours. “Hey there,” you murmur. “It's okay- I'm okay.”

That telling crinkle still lingered around your eyes, but Kyle finds it does nothing to quell the squeezing between his ribs he hadn't noticed before.

It wasn't that you had gotten hurt,

It was that you clearly didn't give a fuck that you'd been on the receiving even if several snapping jaws hours prior.

“Right.” He says, clearing his throat when his voice comes out more rough than intended. “Right. I know that.”

“It's sweet, though,” you continue. Gloved thumb brushing so delicately over his knuckles. It's silly, and Kyle can't help but let out a tiny chuckle at the ridiculousness of it. You, laying in his bed shirtless, with only a pair of gloves on. Fuck.

“What is?” He asks, the corner of his mouth quirking up just the slightest.

“That you care so much about little ‘ol me.” Kyle gets the feeling that was supposed to come out more as another teasing remark, but there's an underlying softness that makes it not quite strike its mark.

With another shaky chuckle, Kyle squeezes your hand then pulls away, opening up the final bandage and smoothing it down over the scratch. Directly over your thrumming heart, and Kyle swears he feels it speed up, just a tiny bit, under his touch.

“That I do.”

Or he could've been imagining things.

It's not the easiest conclusion to come to, and sometimes Kyle swears he can still hear the grating voice of his grandfather grumbling at the TV that fateful day in 2014. The day parliament legalized the marriage between same sex couples.

But he wants this. He wants you.

You're far more important than the gripes of a couple elders who, though he loves them dearly, are stuck in the past.

Kyle had mulled over it time and time again. Ideas of you leaving, shipped off back to your home, wherever that was. Furthermore, thoughts of you finding someone else, maybe some cheerful bird, filled the sergeant with a sickening jealousy.

He had come to terms with this, despite Ghost's warning still lingering in the back of his mind, but he was still stuck.

It was, well, not easy to come to this on his own, his feelings for you. Ones that had quickly developed beyond friendship.

That didn't mean you felt the same.

Kyle tried not to let that sinking feeling linger as you two lounged on the couch, watching some dumb horror movie. Something that moreso consisted of the two of you bickering amongst yourself about the inaccuracies of the film.

Had the directors never seen a dead body or something- scratch that. It was extremely likely that they, in fact, had not. Sometimes he forgets that not everyone murders people for a living.

“-those are the worst blood effects I have ever had the misfortune of seeing.” You pipe up beside him, the resulting snorted laugh you make jostling him slightly.

The both of you were seated side by side on the couch, the room dimmed and the TV the only source of light. No one else was around, but that likely had more to do with the fact that they all were in the mess hall getting dinner.

You and him had decided on sharing a few snacks while watching your little movie. Thighs and arms touching, comfortably relaxed against one another.

“It looks like they just squirted a ketchup bottle all over the wall.” Kyle agreed, stuffing his mouth with another handful of trail mix. The kind with mini peanut butter cups in it; the best kind.

“Poorly.” You grunt, smacking his hand away playfully when he makes another grab for the bucket—a treat you had apparently had stashed away—and grabbing a scoop of your own.

Kyle hums his agreement, and the two of you continue through the remainder of the film just like that. When it ends, you start up another, and he has not a single protest lingering on the tip of his tongue.

It's a quarter of the way through—something about space; Kyle's never been a fan about space movies, but he doesn't mind it so much when sitting by you—the film when he starts to feel the alluring siren song of sleep calling his name.

He fights it at first, determined not to waste a moment of the time he has with you. But after a certain point, the sergeant can't hold back the drooping of his eyelids anymore. Fluttering shut and slipping into the blissful quiet of slumber, a sleep far more restful by your side than he's had in weeks.

Warm. The mattress is warm and soft beneath him. Kyle's eyelids peel open slowly, taking in his surroundings with blurry, sleep heavy eyes.

The first thing he notices is that he's not in his room. Startling, but then the memory of watching a couple movies with you comes to the front of his mind and Kyle settles. He must've just fallen asleep on the couch, the TV still mumbling, volume low, images flickering.

The couch was breathing.

It's then that Kyle registered the scratchy texture of a shirt beneath his cheek, when he realizes the pillow he is clutching is not a pillow. No. It's far, far worse. The shit of nightmares.

…It was you.

And the entirety of Kyle's upper body was sprawled over your own form. That pillow? Not a pillow. No, no. His fingers were just shy of grabbing your fuckin' pec, right beneath it, splayed over your ribs.

His head nestled against your stomach, an honest to god puddle of drool staining the poor fabric of your shirt and sticking to his cheek. Fuck. Fuck.

Kyle did not want to deal with this shite. Fuck that. He was tired. And this was so far the best damn sleep he has ever had.

Maybe.. maybe he could just return to that. Just drift off again. Surely you hadn't noticed that he was awake yet.

So, he does just that. Controls his breathing to the best of his ability, calming his heart to an acceptable pace again, and doing his best impression of an unconscious shift in his sleep that he damn well can.

You say nothing, and Kyle takes that as a win.

The next second it takes all his strength not to flinch, not to make any indication that he felt it, when your hand comes up to brush gentle fingertips over his scalp. It's unbelievably soothing, falling into the rhythm of your nails scratching lightly over his hair.

Kyle's body relaxed immediately, eyelids drooping once again. Lower and lower, until he can't keep them open any longer.

It's nice. Now that he doesn't have to worry. Your hand drifts a bit lower, playing with the tiny hairs at the base of his skull.

He blacks out after that.

Things shifted after that night. Kyle doesn't know how you managed it, but he had woken up in his own bed that next morning. More well rested than he could ever remember being. That worn little cube on his desk.

The following week, you both dance around each other. It's infuriatingly similar to the way Kyle has witnessed Ghost and Soap doing it; at the same time he just can't fucking make himself do anything about it.

Kyle feels like one of those stupid birds in those nature documentaries. Like a peacock when he sees you in the gym at the same time he is, flaunting his strength and lean build. Finds himself puffing out his chest a bit more when he's out throwing drills at the newbies and sees you walking by.

The days are filled with touches that linger a little too long to be considered friendly, buzzing electricity between you two with every brush of an arm, every playful shove. He hasn't seen you in anything but full uniform since the time he tended to your wounds—after you got attacked but a hoard of fuckin dogs—, but somehow those little touches feel so much more intimate than if you two just got your shit together and fucked.

That was another idea Kyle had considered before he accepted the feeling he held for you; he wanted to make sure it wasn't just physical. Wasn't only surface level shite.

And it wasn't.

Don't get him wrong, you were hot as hell- something he was still coming to terms with, but not wrong. It's just that he spent more time observing every twitch of the meager features he could see, than he did on obvious things. Things like those thick thighs, the muscle defined even through the cloth, that could probably crush his damn skull.. or that nice arse.. and those biceps he wanted to be squished between..

Enough of.. that. What Kyle meant was that he searched out things like the crinkles at the corners of your eyes that meant you were either giving him a blinding smile, or glaring a burning hole into one of your rowdy teammates. The scrunch of your eyebrows, adorably so, when you fidget with something. Or that one time when he caught you cussing out one of your subordinates.

Fuck. He was so ruined.

There were also a few more movie nights, all of which either ended with him falling asleep on you again, or the both of you slumbering away on that old sofa.

You two always, without fail, ate your meals together. Never in mess, almost always in the communal kitchen or outside on your hill.

He liked the way the sun reflected in your eyes, how it brightened the color of your irises. Kyle got so caught up in it sometimes that he didn't realize he was staring until he heard you stumble over your words. Snapped out of your trance long enough to catch a glimpse of the privileged sight of a light pink just barely noticeable across the bridge of your nose.

You were skilled in the arts of handling your mask just like Ghost was. Always slipping it up just enough to take a nibble before tugging it back down, too fast for him to catch a glimpse beneath the cloth.

Kyle didn't know why you wore it, more than the other Shadows did, and it wasn't his place to ask just yet. He would never push you if it made you uncomfortable. At the very least he was glad to see you were fine with eating in front of him.

It all came to head one evening. The two of you are watching the sunset on your little hill again, sitting shoulder to shoulder in the damp grass.

Kyle doesn't know when the tone became so strained between you, but he felt you start to tense up beside him. Nearly imperceptible to anyone who wasn't attuned to your every move.

Gently, he nudges you with a light knock of his shoulder against yours, giving you a small smile when you glance over at him.

“Something on your mind?” He asks, voice softer than he had ever used with you. But.. but it felt right.

The two of you. On this hill. The sun setting and casting an array of colors across your features, lighting up those gorgeous eyes he adored so much.

You shrug and shake your head, eyes crinkling slightly. “Nah, nothin' much. Just thinking.”

Kyle nods. “A’right,” then, “but I'll listen if you need to get something off your chest.”

Your smile becomes genuine, and you nudge him back. “I know you will.”

He takes it with a soft hum, looking back at the setting sun, now almost completely past the horizon. The heat and light slowly sucked from the earth along with the great ball of fire.

Kyle knows it's just his mind playing tricks on him, but he swears the air has already dropped several degrees. Enough to make him shiver, and suddenly there's a rift between you two he doesn't remember being there before.

It feels like you both are miles apart, even though your arm is still pressed snug against his.

You shift then, pulling away to stand and brush off your clothes. “Best get inside now, yeah?” Your voice is quiet, lacking in its usual spark.

“Yeah.” Kyle says after a pause, and he takes your outstretched hand without hesitation. The glove is a rough contrast to his softer palms; the contact breaks as soon as he's on his feet.

You descend the hill together, the tension between you both growing higher and higher and Kyle is afraid it might snap. Afraid what could have changed.

He's just a few steps away from the side door of the building when your hand shoots out, grasping his wrist and yanking him back.

“Wha-”

“Kyle.” You say, and he finds himself with his back against the brick wall, your hand pressed against his chest. Keeping him in place.

“Everything okay..?” he trails off. You don't speak, seeming to be considering something. And Kyle wishes desperately, not for the first time, to see what is going on in that pretty little skull of yours.

You don't answer, a trembling hand raising, the one not holding him in place. Kyle is too late to realize what you're doing, your mask tugged down for the first time.

And what a wondrous sight that was.

He doesn't get the chance to react before your coming in closer, closer, closer-

The spark is back in an instant, that earlier warmth blossoming between you two as your lips meet. Soft, delicate at first. As if you're both afraid of fracturing this moment before you have the chance to savor it.

Just a brush of your mouth against his. Kyle's hand finds its place on your jaw, cupping it ever so gently, the other resting on your waist.

You pull back a few centimeters, a small, nervous smile on your lips.

Kyle's heart stops right then.

He never thought he would see you smile. The sight of which has heat warming his chest, his heart pounding heavily against his ribcage. It had to have been the greatest thing he's ever witnessed.

“There you are,” he murmurs, thumb brushing over your cheek.

A small laugh bubbles from you and- scratch out what he said before. This. This is the best thing he's ever seen. And heard. The sound drew a soft chuckle from his own chest.

“I wanted to do it sooner..” you admit, pulling your bottom lip into your mouth and nibbling on it. Kyle wants to do it for you, but he lets you speak. “But I, uh.. didn't know if you'd built some fantasy of what I looked like. And.. I didn't wanna, y'know, disappoint..”

“You didn't.” He breathes, and Kyle's other hand leaves your waist to join the other in cradling your face. “You never could.”

And then you're kissing again. This one is more firm, more confident than the first. Both of you pressing closer and closer as if you can't get enough. The sun is back and shining in his damn chest, it's so fucking blinding but he doesn't care, you. You. You. It's all you and you are his sun. He meant it before, there's nothing you could ever do to disappoint him–

A shrill buzzing cuts through the air, the two of you separating. Panting into each other's mouths, dazed as your eyes meet his. Open and full of liquid adoration.

The noise goes off again and it takes you both a delayed moment to realize the sound is coming from your pocket.

Kyle keeps his hands on your waist as you fish the damned device out. Fiddling with it until you get it unlocked and see what all the fuss is about.

You freeze. And the cold is back. Same as when the sun had set. Dying flames burning out.

“Who is it?” Kyle chances, hesitant to break the silence but that's all it takes. You pull away and Kyle goes to follow, to keep you from slipping from his hold when he's only just gotten you-

“I- I gotta go.” You rush out, not even glancing up at him as you shove your phone back into your uniform and head inside. The metal door shuts with a deafening slam.

Kyle doesn't go back inside until the tips of his fingers have gone numb from the cold.

Price drags him out of bed the next morning with a sharp rap on his door and Kyle has to pretend he had been sleeping. Like he hadn't been sitting at his desk all night—he had only had you in his bed twice, but that was enough for your memory to haunt it—, staring at his phone. Hoping it will buzz.

Even if he had never given you his number.

Price doesn't give him any more time to sulk, knocking on his door again and barking at him to get his arse up to one of the briefing rooms.

Kyle is barely present by the time he reaches his destination. Not even remembering the steps it had taken to get this far. Nonetheless, he pushed the door open and stepped inside, greeted by a dim room, a pissed Price, and a grim Laswell on the laptop.

“‘Bout damn time, Sergeant.”

“Sorry, sir-” Feeling horribly exposed, Kyle shoved his hands into his pockets. Stalling when his fingertips brush against a familiar cube.

“Nevermind that. Laswell.” Price looks at her, and Laswell’s frown only deepens. Kyle doesn't bother sitting.

“What's wrong?” He asks when no one else speaks, idly toying with the rubik's cube in his pocket.

“Go on,” Price grits out, and this had to be one of the few moments Kyle had ever seen his captain so pissed off. A scowl etched deep into his features.

“Well, boys,” Laswell sighs. “This isn't going to be pretty.”

She pulls out a thin folder, but Kyle knows better by now to feel his stomach drop as she opens it.

His fingers squeeze tight around the cube.

Little didn't mean good.

“Ghost and Soap are on the run in Mexico,” a beat. “From Shadow Company.”

Little just meant they didn't know jack shit.

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Masterpost | One | Next

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@cptg00s3 @ruthgrimxiao @20nerd04-blog @gloma08 @mikahrh @in-down @hauntedapplefarm @mello-life25 @unkn0wnd3ad @tayaisback @starre-eyes @gabbvr-dog @suhmie @lazyrel @spiritzofthedead @yeonpm @its-ares @k1ssesofdeath @ravagerdogz @embry-garrick-ravengard @the-spartan-himself @justacreamcheesesandwich @dilf-lvvr @tukus13 @literallyrousseau @olibird @academiq

If you want to be added, or removed, to the tag list, let me know in the comments!

[lurkingshan]

Japanese QL Corner

ICYMI: There are so many Japanese qls airing weekly, so I’m going to start posting this little round up at the end of each week. All but one of these are on Gaga and I highly recommend watching! Yes, even the ones I'm not loving! We need to encourage these Japanese studios to keep giving us access to their content. Changing up the order this week so as not to lead on a bum note (we can end on one, instead:)).

Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yara ka

When we left off with Kazuyo’s confession last week, I said this: “Kazuyo is such a sweetheart that I really hope she'll stick around rooting for this pair once she inevitably gets let down gently.” And we got all that and more this week, because this show is my perfect angel that has never done anything wrong in its life. I love that Kazuyo is not only at peace with Sakae’s feelings for Soga, but very enthusiastically supportive of his pursuit. I love this friendship, and I love that we’re spending real time on Kazuyo’s feelings in the aftermath of this rejection. And we continue to see bits of the past relationships that have been weighing on Sakae and Soga. This show really cares about its characters and it shows. Sakae’s confession at the end of this episode was another great moment of grace and kindness and I’m looking forward to Soga’s response once he has a chance to process alongside some healthy jealousy as Sakae’s ex returns.

Perfect Propose

The first two episodes of this new jbl dropped today, and I loved it. Overworked young salaryman, Hiro, is falling apart. His childhood friend, Kai, finds him lying exhausted on the street and invites himself to move in to take care of him. Kai explicitly declared 1) that he is gay and 2) that he considers himself Hiro’s fiancé within the first five minutes, and helped Hiro get off so he could sleep properly in the first episode. This drama really said eat real food, have a nice orgasm, and get a good night’s sleep and you will be happy, and it seems to be building to some themes about the harm caused by the culture of overworking. I support this message!

Ossan's Love Returns

...where to even begin. This "honeymoon" episode was bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S. I went from crying to laughing hysterically to gasping to staring in mute horror at my screen to laughing to crying again. This show is so good at keeping these characters grounded in authentic emotion even as their behavior spins far out of the realm of how real people behave. It's a minor miracle that I can be gaping at Maki in disbelief and then bursting into tears two seconds later because of one perfectly executed line. I don't even want to talk about what specifically happened in this episode, I just want you to go watch it.

Tsukuritai Onna to Tabetai Onna 2

WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK, BABY!!! I got my hot little hands on the first four episodes of this excellent second season and let me tell you, the joy I felt to see Yuki and Kasuga again! I love that we came back to find out the gals have been eating like queens and blowing the budget. Plus, there's a new baby lesbian in the building! This season is really delving into Yuki's exploration of her sexuality, and the show is handling it with the expected gentle grace. I am enjoying the journey and putting on my patient pants to settle in for a long wait before these two actually officially get together.

Chaser Game W

This was a rougher week for this show, in that the pacing felt very jerky as the story suddenly executed a rapid turn in the romance that did not really work. The backstory reveal was weak (very poorly motivated noble idiocy), Itsuki's casual decision to start caring for Fuyu's child at the expense of her own life and Fuyu's decision to let her was under-explored, the messages about the importance of these women's work was decidedly mixed, and the sudden love confessions straight to sex didn't get proper build up. Add Fuyu continuing to be a violent drunk who treats Itsuki like shit, and it's hard to root for this pair--I am not really invested in the romance. This show is clearly going somewhere with its commentary on gender roles as it relates to Fuyu's behavior, and I hope wherever it is will feel worth it.

Sahara Sensei to Toki-kun

This show ended this week, and I pretty much hated it, but I will always love Toki despite the mess this show made of his story. We have one more show coming from Drama Shower for the season, and I sincerely hope we can end on a good note with this project.

[utilitycaster]

@notstinglesstoo replied to your post “The thing is, and I haven't gotten a chance to...”:

I saw someone not long ago say cr has always felt like a product to them vs D20 feeling organic and I protected my peace but I did want to ask them if they were brain dead

​Oh man I wanted to address this at length because I feel this. My posts have been centered, again, specifically on published journalists picking Daggerheart aprt critically and applauding themselves for doing so despite it being within a couple of hours of its release and therefore any analysis is necessarily going to be based on at best, a skim, when they just as frequently will claim D20 seasons/Kollok are flawless works of genius based on only a partial read, but man D20's got a fandom problem too. (and all of the following comes with the caveat of "I really enjoy D20, and Dropout, and while we're at it WBN and NADDPod which both are half D20 Intrepid Heroes cast, and think Brennan is a particularly brilliant GM, and also it's obvious that the D20 and CR casts are on great terms, and wish the fandom for D20 were more welcoming and enjoyable because I feel it wasn't like this when I first started watching, as a CR fan, in late 2019 and has since curdled into something really weird and bad.")

The first point is the obvious one: technically speaking these are both products. These are performers doing an art form; it is also a portion of how they make their money with which they can buy goods and services. Believing that art is inauthentic when the artist gets paid and acknowledges that is a thing that happens is a fucking libertarian position at best. Like cool, you think only people who are independently wealthy by other means can make art, because it's not real labor, my kid could paint that, etc etc.

The second point is also pretty obvious. I have pushed back pretty hard on the "uwu CR is just watching friends! it's like we're in their living room" mentality among the fandom, which has decreased, thankfully, but like...it did in fact start organically as a private home game, and they decided, when invited, to make it A Show For An Audience. D20 was created on purpose as a show for an audience. This doesn't make it bad or fake - reread the previous paragraph - but in terms of "this is an group of people who really played D&D in this world together even before the cameras were rolling," Critical Role literally is that, and D20 is not.

I think beyond that...my biggest issues with the D20 fandom are first, the level of discourse is abominable. The tag is almost always just shrieking praise and the most surface-level readings possible. I keep bringing up the "Capitalism is the BBEG" mug but it genuinely sums up so much of how I feel; people who want their existing beliefs fed to them as surface-level no-nuance takes. I mean capitalism is fucking terrible but I do not need every work I watch to have a character turn to the camera and say "capitalism is bad" to enjoy myself, and indeed it makes it harder due to the lack of subtlety and grace. For all D20 fans complain about how unhealthily parasocial CR fans can be (and some can be), I find that a lot of the most unhealthily parasocial "how dare they BETRAY my TRUST by having a ship I don't like or not speaking up about every single societal ill" ex-CR fans move over to D20 and then pull the exact same shit; it simply doesn't get called out. Every time D20 fans are like "we don't want to become the CR fandom" it's like "your toxic positivity and unhealthy parasocial behavior exceeds the HEIGHT of what I've seen in CR; the main difference is that CR started in 2015 when D&D was still shaking off the raging bigot dudebros and so in the early days it acquired more of those fans, whereas by the time D20 came around the landscape of who played D&D and watched Actual Play had shifted wildly, and you need to judge September 2018 D20 fans in parallel to September 2018 CR fans, not September 2015 CR fans."

I also feel, and I alluded to this in the post about journalism, and other people have said this better than I have, but the pedestal people have put D20 on does feel like a single...not even misstep, but just, difficult choice that doesn't capitulate to the loudest fans will bring a good chunk of that fandom crashing to the ground. And that includes the journalists. For all the fans of CR can still be obsessed with the cast to an unhealthy degree? The cast and company have put up pretty strong boundaries and have not budged. D20 hasn't, and I think the second they do - and I think it will be for their benefit as a company and a channel - a big chunk of their most vitriolic CR-hating portion of the fandom will viciously turn on them.

[hotwaterandmilk]

Just a reminder that the first volume of Nanao Tomo's The Hachioji Specialty: Tengu's Love comes out in English from Yen Press this week. I already double-dipped on the Japanese volumes, but I'm going back for more with the English volume too.

While a lot of series captivate me with their plot, Hachioji Meibutsu: Tengu no Koi grabbed my attention with its beautiful retro-tinged art and has continued to hold my interest with its atmosphere.

So why is this series such a highlight in the current ASUKA magazine lineup? I've tried to breakdown my thoughts (albeit sleepily) on why I like this title and why other readers might be keen to give it a shot now that it's enjoying an English-language release.

The series description from Yen Press describes the series as follows:

"Can a determined tengu bride change a lonesome bachelor’s ways? Well, it’s not like he’s got much of a choice— ’cos she’s already moving in! Young systems engineer Kotarou has had to make his own way in life. Nothing remains of his early childhood before he was orphaned—nothing except his grandparents’ antique house in Hachioji and memories of Hime, the winged spirit girl he’s come to dismiss as a youthful flight of fancy. But after his return to Hachioji and reunion with Hime, it becomes impossible to deny the existence of his fine, feathery friend—especially given that she’s declared they’re getting married at second sight!"

Which makes it sound like you're signing up for a typical 90s-style magical girlfriend series and, well, to an extent you are. Hime is beautiful, powerful and innocent in the ways of the human world. Kotarou on the other hand is somewhat average, cynical human who now finds himself saddled with an otherworldly bride. Hijinks ensue!

What I think helps Tenkoi differentiate itself from other series with similar setups (aside from the stunning art) is that it gives both the reader and the characters time to breathe, to be in each other's company, and exist without needing constant jokes. There's this ancient peace to Hime's village and a gentleness in her exchanges with Kotarou, even as a gaggle of her relatives argues around them.

Even the gag moments have a beauty and sense of pacing about them that's hard to find these days. We actually get the space to see Hime interact with the vacuum, for example. What so many titles might have condensed into 3 panels at best is expanded here, allowed to sit, presented to us for enjoyment. I just love that about Tenkoi, there is no real rush even when the series is moving Hime and Kotarou's relationship forward.

There's a willingness in Tenkoi to sit with difficult moments, mundane moments, humorous moments and moments of affection. To let each have its time to unfurl, to let us savour them all.

There's also an appreciation of the Hachioji region and the way the local population interact with the natural and spiritual world despite being in a suburban location (though this comes up a bit more by the second volume).

Another thing I like is that while there are a few gags about Kotarou being entranced by and touching Hime's wings (which she says are off-limits) overall Kotarou is a decent guy. While initially unsure about the situation he supports Hime in leaving the village for her own sake, aiming to empower her rather than to score himself a tengu bride. While at one point in the first volume he gets frustrated by just how hard it is to hide a lively tengu from the world, he soon sees the error in his ways and again pledges to support Hime in whatever she chooses to do.

It's just nice to see a male lead who can be wrong, admit he was wrong, and strive to make things right with the people around him in such a mature way? He sleeps on it and is like fuck, I was an asshole my life is better with her in it and immediately gets his shit together. Some leads can go dozens of volumes without figuring out that much so it was nice to see that corner turned early on in the series.

I should mention that food is an important part of how love is expressed in this series and a big part of how Hime begins to learn about the human world, so if food is a major trigger for you then Tenkoi might be best avoided. However, there are minimal other warnings I can think of for those considering starting the series (aside from consent being established regarding Hime's wings).

Tenkoi is still ongoing in ASUKA (which is published bi-monthly these days) so there's only two print volumes right now. There's enough little moments in this lushly rendered and atmospheric supernatural love story that it could go for many years at its current clip, but whether that happens remains to be seen.

Right now though I enjoy Tenkoi for being a simple story told well and with heart. If you're not looking for major plot innovation and are happy to just spend time in the presence of these characters experiencing simple joys in Hachioji, then this is a title I recommend.

(Also Hime is super cute, I adore her.)

[lostonmyroad]

Moments That I Want Tattooed On My Forehead From S-Classes That I Raised Chapters 30-50

BEWARE OF SPOILERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

things are starting to get going. and by get going i mean starting to get unhinged but its still nothing compared to the shit going on by the 300s

chapter 30-40

lmfao yoojin forgetting he blocked yoohyun’s number...king shit

yoojin daring yoohyun to call him out on his suspicious behavior...also king shit 

chapters 40-50

let’s go sung hyunjae makes his debut!!!!

YOOHYUN ACTING INNOCENT IN FRONT OF YOOJIN AS HE MEETS THE GUILD LEADERS AKFJEIDIDOODSOOS highkey one of my favorite scenes ever. “my brother is more mild mannered than me” “yoohyun is an angel” everyone else in the room: press X to doubt

moon hyuna woman that you are. my beloved. you’re too good for this world 

i live for yoohyun generally being a freak about yoojin

i need to know what blackmail he has on moon hyuna. what happened at the convenience store????? moon hyuna what did you do???

thank u yerim and moon hyuna friendship. we love to see it. Now s ranks also passes the bechdel test!!

ah yes potion addict yoojin has arrived. rip buddy at least you get better flavors later down the line

it’s only chapter 44 and yoojin is already being overworked. true cale henituse moment. rip your slacker life!!!

everyone ganging up on him to start enforcing self care. oh honey it only gets worse from here!!!

so far yoojin is: a monster tamer, social media account manager, recruiter for hayeon, owns a building with a research lab…my guy was speedy with it

yoojin going "i just need to complete one (1) more task and then I can live like a slacker" in the early chapters is. oh wow. famous last words. truly need to learn from cale

even peace is a borderline freak when it comes to yoojin. doesn’t give a shit about anyone else 

YOOJIN ANSWERING SPAM CALLS JUST TO MESS WITH PEOPLE SKDJEIODO…he enjoys it…this explains so much about him…he’s bragging about how much experience he has answering them…

yoojin guessing who the kidnappers were because they didn’t call Peace cute is so valid. Anyone who doesn’t like Peace is an enemy

we’re starting to get into “oh wow fear resistance is kind of fucked territory”!!! yoojin is a little freak!!! he’s committing war crimes but sometimes it just be like that

rip blackie chapter 46-47 :(

yoojin treating the s ranks like normal people and them not knowing how to handle it ;((

GIVE YOOJIN HIS OSCAR NOW “uwu i’m a poor kidnapping victim” like sir. you dissolved your kidnappers in acid. sir. 

all the details about yoojin’s life as a low ranked hunter pre-regression :(((

like not yoojin casually mentioning he used to be an alcoholic and yoohyun sent him to rehab pre regression. ok king. we don’t have time to unpack all that

kang soyoung intro!!! i so desperately need to know what her deal was with yoohyun pre regression. why does yoojin think of her as his sister in law. why did everyone believe they were dating.

next chapter brings us a real introduction to sung hyunjae character of all time

[darcytaylor]

It is tiring, is it not, trying to be a voice of reason in a fandom hell-bent on indulging in anything but? I admire your conviction and constancy, you're a stronger soldier than I.

Day after day I log in, finding very little in the fandom that interests me. I deleted my original blog because I was getting hate in my inbox on one hand and getting blocked by certain accounts then getting shit-talked by them on the other and people telling me about it. I don't need something like that in my life, especially not about something as inconsequential as a bloody TV show. Now I just mostly observe and occasionally slide into the ask box of people like you.

I think it's important to realize that at its core, this isn't about the show or Nic or Luke at all, it's about people meeting emotional needs by latching onto a piece of comfort media. A lot of the more extreme accounts in the fandom seem to be run by people with substantial trauma who are just trying to cope with the realities of life by rejecting them. It's unfortunate that they're taking it out on real people who just happen to be actors, but my hope is that the outlandishness of the claims makes it very easy for Nic and Luke to dismiss them outright and protect their peace.

I've been protecting my peace as well by not engaging. It just... It doesn't matter that much, none of this does. It's just entertainment. One day, people will delete their blogs, Tumblr will cease to exist, and so will the Universe, eventually. Not to get all existential on you lol, but everything that's ever been created and will ever be created will fade into irreversible nothingness. Do we really want to spend the limited time we have on Earth having bad experiences, especially unnecessary ones? The answer for me is no. But if other people are choosing this distress, it's not for me to tell them not to. It is their job to protect their own peace, if they so wish. And if they don't - well, it's their life to waste.

Appreciate you and hope we get more good career news from Nic and Luke soon! Have a good one.

Well, this is a thoughtful and introspective ask. Thank you for taking the time to share this, and for your kind words. It can definitely feel exhausting sometimes, trying to keep a level head in a space that can be so volatile and toxic. (I wouldn’t call myself the voice of reason - I’m just a human trying to be a positive presence online). But messages like yours remind me why I try - because there are people out there quietly observing, navigating the chaos in their own way, and some who may find some value in what I share.

I completely understand your decision to step back and protect your peace. That’s a smart move, and honestly, a much healthier one in a lot of ways. I’m sorry you had to deal with hate and gossip - it’s so disheartening how a space meant to bring joy can spiral into something so toxic. Like I’ve said before, if you don’t like a take you come across that isn't hurting anybody, there’s no need to respond in a hateful way (I do it all of the time!). People don’t need to belittle others for thinking differently. That doesn’t create an environment where everyone can actually enjoy themselves, learn, or connect. Instead, it just breeds hostility and defensiveness. And when people feel attacked, they’re less likely to engage in meaningful ways and more likely to retaliate. It’s just a vicious cycle of negativity, and no one wins in the end.

You bring up a good point about fandoms being a way for people to meet emotional needs (I mean I guess that's one of the reasons why I'm here). It’s such a bittersweet thing. On one hand, fandoms can be this amazing space for creativity and connection, but it can also turn into an unhealthy escape for some. Like you said, when this need for comfort becomes fixated on, it can lead to harmful projections - where the lines between fantasy and reality blur, and the people involved, like Nicola and Luke, are treated as though they’re part of that escape, instead of being real individuals.

I'm sure that Nicola and Luke are able to dismiss the more extreme stuff. I imagine that as public figures, they’ve probably had the opportunity to get some training or support to help them deal with everything that comes with fame - whether it’s media training, social media strategies, or just leaning on the people around them. They should hopefully have the tools they need to manage.

It’s a bit of a comfort to think that the more outlandish claims might be easier for them to brush off though, but it’s still a shame that they even have to deal with it in the first place. It’s a good reminder for all of us to try to approach spaces like this with more care and awareness.

Your existential perspective makes sense, none of this will matter in the grand scheme of things. What does matter is how we spend our time and the experiences we choose to let into our lives.

Thank you for your kind words and for this reminder about the bigger picture. Take care of yourself, and know that your choice to protect your peace is something to be admired.

Bring on more good news from Nicola, Luke and the rest of the Bridgerton cast! ❤️

[lilyosamu]

Normal Fucking Day

Alastor × Reader

Before reading, i will like to inform you that this version isn't finish and will never will be, if you want more information i will put a link where i talk why, anyways hope you still enjoy.

Warnings: cursing, blood, killing, reader has a problem

______

Fucking shit…

who could have thought that your co-worker could be a degenerate fucking cult leader…?!

I am sorry but i am done from this shit. Nope this shit is worst then the time that my mother tried to stab me with a fucking sandal. Actually i prefered if i could go to that time then this shit….

Ugh, why the dangerous psychopaths are the hot boys? Literally he is soo fucking hot Alexander. I could say some catching quotes like: “i don't mind you stabbing me~” but i could say that for shits and giggles! Not when that person literaly tried to stab me!?

Alexander almost stabbed Reader untill he paused and look at Reqder and ask:

“Do you always think aloud?”

“Shit! Did i say that aloud?!”

“yes and you are doing again”

As Reader was distracted as she felt ashemed and Alexander had the time in succeding in stabing her on her left shoulder.

“Fuck! You motherless son of a bitch! Hope you choke on a dick! No actually i hope you choke with your salivia! Hope you have the most stupidiest death! I want it to be so stupid that they can't make it public! Like…you electrocute yourself when you tried to use a sex toy when you could be in a bathtub with water you dumb shit-”

Of course Reader inuslted Alexander for the 15 minutes or at leats she planned that but Alexander didn't let her and knock her out.

You may be wandering why didn't she fight back? Well the same reason you start your homework at the last minute. because both of you are stupid.

______

When you opened your eyes you were tied down on a..table…?

“oh great. Do you know people this is how almost every porn video start?”

Actually you didn't know shit because you never saw a porn video in your life, i guess It's a curse and blessing at the same time or…maybe you have been cursed by the god of porn because you didn't watch in your entire life a porn video…

“what the fuck.”

You didn't even look at your surroundings but now with the voice that interrupted your thought you notice there is at least 34 people surrounding you.

“Oh, did i talk at loud again my thoughts?”

You said as you look at them. You had a feeling they were done with your shit without even seeing their faces. Well, it's not your fault they chose to be in a cult.

____

“Borther and Sisters, we are reunited in this beutiful demoniacal hour for our sacrifice for our lord-”

Before Alexander could say something else Reader interrupted him

“if i die as a sacrifice can at least die in peace knowing that i died to a hot god or whatever..?

One in the crowd said

“how dare you, you insolent-”

Reader again interrupted

“yeah yeah, “how could i?” but did you forget how your leader captured me? He propose me a one night stand and he knows how I am weak for pretty boys or girls~”

“okay just stop” Alexander said “Can't you be fucking serious for once in your life?! aren't you afraid for you life?!”

“ho you sweet summer child. Bold of you to assume i love my life-”

“would you shut up if i give you a dollar?”

And that actually did shut Reader as she was similing like an idiot with her one dollar that could not even spend, if the sacrifice was a success or she doesn't escape.

But guess what? Did she even try to escape? Nah, will she regret it? Probably but like she said “future problems for future me”

____

As the cult do its ritual, flames, dark shadow and a dark black light come from no where. Reader wasn't a religious type but that didn't mean she didn't believe in supernatural beings, she was pissy because she didn't have any popcorn for this or maybe she should film it but she thoughts that if she publish on YouTube no one could think the video is real but she could always do some buzz!

Reader didn't have an angel or demon on her shoulders. No, she had another version of her but with an expensive suit with expensive glasses that always thinks “mmmh…is it worth it the effort? Is it beneficial with money?”

anyways like every sane person you think, why Reader is thinking about that when she is in an horrible situation ?! Well i don't know Charle, why are we alive when we will die at the end?!

____

Before Reader could lose any other type of sanity (if it even exist) she stopped her thoughts and look what the fuck the cult members summoned, it could be funny if they summoned an instopable force without any morality and kills you but also the memebers…AHAahah…oh fuck..you realise you jinks it.

And guess what? You were right, the thing that they summoned it attacked everything and killed every members that tried to run away, you didn't know how after all you closed your eyes to not be even more traumatized then you are already but you could certainly hear their screams of pain, it feel like hearing souls from hell getting tortured there. It felt like the entity knew exactly how to inflect pain to give the most horrible death possible.

Even when the screaming stopped you open your eyes again after a good minute and you didn't believe what you are just seeing! A fucking furry…?! Actually you have no idea if It's a half wolf but you are sure that his aesthetic is a little too red for your liking and it felt like even if it had a humanoid appearance it was everything but human. That thing had too much of a dark aura to not feel like fleeing like a little bitch but you were lucky because mama didn't raise a bitch so you are going to face him! Wait- actually mama didn't raise anyone. She was a bit-

Plus it's not like you had a choice, you were still tied up.

You waited for your end (even if you didn't want a furry to kill you, i mean the ears could make you laugh if you weren’t in such a horrible situation)

And waited

And still waited until you see that that thing was looking at you curiously, ominously like it was thinking what to do to you.

Well the little human was right for once, the demon was interested in her why she wasn't screaming or trying to escaped, it isn't as fun if the victim already accepted Its end. That completely cuts Alastor appetite.

“sooo…” a voice break the tension “are you gonna kill me? After all normally i was suppose to be the sacrifice…”

Alastor's smile went even wider as he said with enthusiasm “Oh my dear! Actually that was the plan! But you seem more interested alive." Was that a compliment?

“oh…thanks..? I think….?..”

Alastor chuckles as your no longer tied down with a simple gesture of Alastor's hand.

“Well my dear..should you introduce yourself?”

“you know my mom said to not talk to strangers-” you tried to joke but that beast gaze was becoming a little too dark

.....

[alottodix]

if South Park was British (lmao) what would the main fours’ favourite insults be. I can so vividly imagine Kyle calling someone a pillock or a knobhead its so funny. I think Cartman

OHHHHH ANON HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU

Okay, so. First, Stan Marsh. He’d definitely be more fond of the blunt ones, the ones that are so simple they’re reflexive for most of the nation – tosser, prick, twat, all of those fun ones. HOWEVER, I also see him having an awesome time with “bloody hell” to portray how fucking fed up he is, like when he does the pinch bridge of nose + look down + very defeated “Jesus Christ” combo in the show. I ALSO IMAGINE HIM BEING SUPER FOND OF HOW BLUNT STUFF LIKE “sod off” IS TO TELL PEOPLE TO LIVE HIM ALONE OR EVEN JUST TO REACT TO DUMB SHIT LIKE THE LITTLE CYNIC HE IS

Now, onto Kyle. Every single time I see the Jersey episode, I mentally have to compare the reality TV show element to shit like Geordie Shore, so if it was a show based in the UK I can only imagine him being Geordie – proper Ant and Dec style. Americans, if you haven’t already, go listen to the accent and tell me it doesn’t have Kyle vibes – it just does. SO, WITH THIS IN MIND, I can totally imagine him whipping out gobshite as an insult, or what a load of bollocks in response to Cartman being an asshole, fun clipped shit like that. There was also a moment of time where I sat down and started plotting a Hogwarts AU, in which I realised I’d have to make these guys vaguely British, and I had such a strong mental image of Kyle jokingly calling Stan a daft git so I feel like he’d love the ones like that – and I agree with anon I think he’d have a lot of fun with knobhead

I feel Kenny would enjoy basically all of them, but for the sake of this dude being muffled as fuck I think he’d get a real kick out of the backwards peace sign – like whenever possible. Also “get stuffed”, for vibes. LISTEN I FEEL I SHOULD BE MORE SCIENTIFIC IN MY METHODS BUT LEAVE ME ALONE LMAO WE GO OFF VIBES HERE

Now, when I think of a British Cartman, I can only imagine a younger Del Boy from ‘Only Fools & Horses’. This is both a blessing and a curse. It’s the shared entrepreneurial spirit and lack of dignity I think. Also the fur coats. And con-artist swagger. And also how well Del Boy takes the piss out of Rodney – if you were to replace Rodney with Butters or Kenny in their search for wealth; this is such a niche reference but somebody reading this is gonna be so fucking happy with it. Because of this, I can only imagine him with the strongest cockney accent known to man, and so, a list of ones I feel he would use:

“Berk”

“Muppet”

“You jammy prick”

“Bleedin’ hell”

“You daft cow”

“Shut your cakehole”

“He’s a right tosser”

“You bleeding mug”

“Wazzock”

Also unrelated but with this guy being the gayest homophobe around, he’d totally be one of those guys to call everyone “babes” (the mental image is making me cackle, he fucking would don’t lie)

ANYWAY LMAO FEEL FREE TO DISCUSS, THANK YOU ANON – THIS WAS INCREDIBLY FUN TO DO, I APOLOGISE FHDKFN