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titan-god-helios · 1 year ago

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pt1 of oddly specific things that give me gender affirmation/euphoria (that may not be that odd but i didn’t expect them so shut up <3 /lh):

wallets !!!! a good stereotypically masculine wallet that’s small and leather and still has lots and lots of usability and looks like something a dad would use makes me feel so masculine !! love it

any type of trouser or bottoms with more than two pockets

windbreaker jackets - they make me go “FUCK YEEAAHH im such a boy a man a male tm yessir” and idk why they just do tho, even the fem ones to an extent

plantssss i love plants and they make me feel like a little gardner boy just yessss

energy drinks for some reason ???? they make the internal man dialogue of “IM A MANNN” go haywire so much

hairbands on my wrist and an excess of those wooden beaded bracelets or even stone beaded jewellery

cross earrings but just bc they look cool (i’m an atheist so yuh, i still love people who have religion too, y’all are awesome <3)

doing the thing with your hair where you take hair from one side and flip it on the other with one hand and its kind of like running your hand through your hair but with long hair…. esp of my other hand is on my hip and i scrunch my face ?!?!?!??!? so boyish i feel so good

dancing like an absolute idiot. i dont know why but every time i just do a little jig for myself by myself my gender is just like “yessssss you’re a boy frfr slay king”

watches !! big chunky analogue watches

following on from the last point, clocks too

mushroomsssss they make the more nonbinary side of me jump for joy cause like “yes ofc im a fucking forest goblin dude i love mushrooms im just a goblin guy leave me alone and let me love the shrooms”

sketching in public. it just doessss

camoflague clothing !! i mean this was probably obvious but when i came out to myself and i wore camo cargo pants (with loads of pockets mind you) i just freaked out in joy i felt so manly that day it was glorious

singing !! singing my favourite songs as low as i can go with it still sounding good

just being as stubborn as possible but in a non problematic (for the most part) way. like if you give me the option to make things easier and more convenient or not i’ll choose the harder option. idk it just makes me feel manly (is this toxic masculinity ?? i dont know but i try to remind myself that this only applies to non mental stuff so i don’t end up self-harming againnnn)

being unnecessarily overdressed

not brushing my hair till its perfectly untangled and just letting it be a bit wild - this came with me figuring out that my hair type is waywayway wavier/curlier than i thought my whole life and learning to take care of it the best i can whilst i have like zero products for waves/curls on hand and as a bonus i felt more masc !!

looking at the stretch marks underneath my boobs in the mirror. i have a large-ish chest i think (DD cup), plus i’m a lil chubby, so i have loads of stretch marks around my chest, and the ones underneath look like top surgery scars, so if i’m having a particularly rough day with my chest dysphoria i’ll look at em and feel a bit better

using my stim toys and accommodations with friends and by myself for my autism and adhd - being capable of taking care of myself finally makes me feel really confident and as a result quite masc as well

stimming by flipping my beaded bracelets between my fingers - this is specific to greek and possibly other cultures similar to greece but it’s typical for a lot of greek men to flip long-ish beaded loops (?? they’re not jewellery and specifically made for this but idk what they’re called so) between their fingers in a similar fashion, and it’s a thing that my dad does a lot when bored. whether neurodivergent or neurotypical it’s a very common thing for men and so doing it makes me not only feel good stimming but also feel manly as fuck ! it feels even better now that my mum saw me doing it once and said “what are you a man ??” and being closeted i had to say “idc im just flipping a bracelet why does it have to be gendered” BUT INSIDE I WAS SO HAPPY

playing card games - when i was younger and even now my dad and grandpa would let me sit in on their card games late at night when we visited them in greece and now when i play card games i always feel so calm and comforted and quietly masculine

drinkingggg now hear me out yes im a minor but i’m also half greek so as a result whenever my parents drink im allowed a bit too (under supervision ofc). anyway that out the way, i have a pretty fucking high alcohol tolerance and considering the fact that it comes from my dad (being asian, my mum’s tolerance is dogshit) plus the stereotypical “men can drink more” stuff i feel SO MANLYYYY when i can quite literally drink more than my dad and feel okay whilst he’s starting to be tipsy (just to clarify though, the stereotype is bullshit and should NOT be perpetuated as much as it is, at least with intent. you guys with low alcohol tolerances are just as manly !! maybe you’re even more manly than those with high tolerance !! and women with high tolerances, you’re still very fem and very cool and valid as a woman and those who aren’t binary or aligning you are valid as your gender or as no gender no matter what tolerance you have <33)

caring about myself more. and i don’t mean in a “i’m gonna have a nice fucking bath and be happy about it” way i mean in a “i’m going to feed myself well, drink lots of water, get good exercise and be respectful to myself at the very least” way. and also in the bath way. baths are nice

collecting shit !! idk dude but having a collection of dumb shit just makes me feel so masc and good cause i swear to the stars nearly every dude i’ve met and stepped into the house of has a collection of SOMETHING whether it’s games, books, rocks, crystals, cookbooks and recipies or art supplies or whatever makes them happy. like legit fucking anything and i like collecting stuff too so its a bonus !!

just being nice. just being a nice dude makes me feel so manly

being silly and myself and doing dumb shit and being unapologetic about it (im still working on being able to do this since i struggle a lot but when i can it feels so good !!)

being stupidly loyal to something equally stupid /pos. like yes i have had this stuffed animal since the dawn of time no i will never get rid of her. she’s a genderfuck lesbian rainbow tiger from buildabear workshop who goes by the name of Roxy i will never get rid of her >:(. and so what my ring is so rusty it makes my skin green every three days ?? i clean it and take it off when it gets out of control back off bitch its mine. why are you so concerned about my shoes ????? fuck you i like them how they are (falling apart and dishevelled, the sole is halfway off already and it hasn’t been even remotely okay since three years ago) and they still fit and work so i’ll wear them until i literally cannot anymore. its so fun and it’s such a “just some guy” activity AND it makes my autism goblin feel safe and good too so its great would reccommend

just talking about stuff i like and that makes me feel good but not to anybody in particular. maybe in my notes, maybe on tumblr (like right now !! i’m doing this one right now !!) maybe on my personal dm to myself. it just makes me feel like a boy i love it PLUS i dont actually have to stress about humans on the other end of it so i feel way more confident and comfortable and as a result even MORE manly !!

ice cream on cones. i will not elaborate

travelling and exploring !! like legit anywhere. as long as i’m moving from one place to another and exploring the world i feel so happy and right and also masculine it’s great i love travelling so much. on holidays i enjoy the act of travelling even more than the holiday itself tbh

(to clarify i identify as male but a bit fucked in the gender - if you want a label i still identify as nonbinary but male aligningg <3)

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ronanceautistic · 9 months ago

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Are there any stranger things characters besides robin and nancy that you think are autistic?

I think possibly all the Byers are. Jonathan definitely is, blatantly, because he stims a lot, got a special interest w photography, is kind of an outcast. I also think Lucas is, too. Like how much he overthinks social interactions, plans them out in advance, has a special interest in like military and weapons n shit (his slingshot, the camo gear, all his vietnam weapons in s1).

El definitely displays a lot of autistic traits, sensory issues, stimming, social difficulties (although she has another reason for that as well). And also I enjoy the Eddie autism headcanon too.

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jinlizz-dragondrama · 1 year ago

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Chapter 7

Dive, Dive Dive

Trigger warning mentions of first period and swearing

F/c- favorite cereal

Today is the day, of my first swimming competition. I was so stoked but very nervous that my stomach was in knots. I woke up to my alarm blasting in my ears which caused me to jump out of bed, tripping on the pile of dirty clothes, and fall face-first onto the floor with a quiet groan. Groggily I get up, stumble to the bathroom, and lazily look around for the light switch, finally finding it I see the remnants of last night's online video gaming session.

*Flashback*

My alarm clock's pink neon numbers read 3 am, wearing my cat-eared headphones (pictured above), cozily reclined in my gaming chair, sipping on a pop/water and assorted junk foods, the sounds of my fingers jamming onto my controller as I absolutely annihilate Donnie in a game he introduced me to.

"Bootyshaker9000 I can smell losing sweat stink!" I say while smirking

"Oh please this is only the first round-" he says before getting interrupted

"Correction this is round 4 and I will crush you! Evil laugh!"

"Tis I who will be crushing you"

"Oooo I'm shaking in my custom black fluffy slippers," I say while giggling

"Scoff did you just- No No No No!" He says as he spams the controller buttons

"Yes... I... did!" making sure to pause between each word

I smirk while looking at the victory screen as my character's victory stims around his. While Donnie sounds like a stuttering tea kettle and no doubt has serious eye twitches, I sign off. Turning my TV, cleaning up my snack mess, and making my way to the kitchen I see Papa Lui drinking a hot cup of cocoa, while he sips I see there is Papa Brutus' signature cocoa cup which is empty and my unicorn cup with chocolate goodness with extra whipped cream.

"You're up late," Papa Lui says while taking a big sip

"Yep, burning that midnight oil with gaming" I chuckle

"We have the opening of our new business venture the "Foot Shack" so we will cut the rubbing do the necessary pleasantries and come to your swim competition. I know you will crush those....what do you kids say these days? Noobs?"

I almost spit out my cocoa when he tries to figure out the hip teenage word. I roll my eyes and smile.

"Wow, a ninja clan owning a storefront sounds like some shady underground business, you guys selling drugs?"

Awkwardly laughing Papa Lui denies any suspicious activities will be happening, I shrug my shoulders while thinking about using this info as blackmail.

"Well whenever you guys need help let me know, I also have a few shoe designs if you're interested" I wash my cup, wave goodnight to him, and jump into my bed.

*Flashback ends*

Looking in my mirror I rub the eye crust out from my eyes, scratch my crazy bedhead, and run the shower water, stepping in I lather my hair with shampoo, rinse, and repeat, once my body is clean I step out of the shower. While drying my hair I put in my contacts making sure they are perfectly positioned. I walk into my room, look through my closet pick out an outfit, grab a camo oversized t-shirt dress wi

th a black belt, put on a pair of Spanx underneath, brush my hair and place it into a messy bun with a dark green scrunchie, grab my phone to check the time, making sure I have everything I needed in my backpack and gym bag. Picking up my shoes I skip to the kitchen to pour myself a bowl of (f/c), some toast, and an orange, while I eat Cass comes in and snags a slice of toast, and rushes out of the room while giving me the peace sign while I flip her off and giggle. I see a note on the table from both my pops telling me good luck and how the whole clan will be there in support, several baggies of healthy snacks (trail mix, granola bars, fruit cups), and a chocolate protein shake with the note. When I'm finished I put my roller shoes on, shrug on my backpack and gym bag, and walk to the hideout front door, clinking my heels together the skates pop out of my shoes. Locking the door behind me with the code I start skating to school.

As I skate I put on my headphones and hit play on my Playlist, I retreat into my little world while skating through the crowds of people on the busy new york streets. Reaching the gates of the school I disengage my skates, seeing April at our meet-up spot I wave to get her attention, she sees me and waves back, we high-five and head over to our first-period class. The day thankfully goes by rather quickly, I start to feel tightness and queasiness in my stomach area it wasn't too bothersome so I ignore it. I make it to the end of the day not seeing April like I normally do I decide to go to the swimming pool to do a couple of practice laps. Changing into my competition bathing suit the colors are purple and black, put on my swim cap making sure all my hair is inside it. I step outside the locker room the sun is shining directly on my face, and I shield my eyes, I feel like I'm being watched but I ignore it. I place my towel on the bleachers, and walk over to the pool while I put on my goggles, jumping into the cool refreshing water I come up for air and float on my back for a brief moment before I start to take slow swimming strokes to the other side of the pool. The feeling in my stomach hasn't gone away but it hasn't gotten worse either, soon my teammates start showing up and starting their warm-ups as well.

Soon it's game time, and the competing school arrives as to parents and guardians of students. I immediately spot April who waves excitedly at me, I wave back and see the turtle brothers in their disguises which are just their hoodies with the hoods up and their choice of pants/shorts even Master Splinter made an appearance in his hip teenage disguise. They all smile at me giving me big thumbs up, I return the gesture and blush a bit as I see Donnie smiling at me. Then I hear my name being called, turning to see Papa Lui and Papa Brutus with Cass and the whole Foot Clan in civilian clothes. I'm so happy they were able to make it after unveiling the shoe store. They are all holding signs with my name and pictures of my face on them, sighing while hiding my face as I quickly walk over to my teammates to see what events I'll be participating in.

I was one of the first to go as my event was the starter one which is the 50-meter freestyle (which is swimming from one end of the pool and back to the original starting spot aka one lap). Stepping onto the small diver board I adjust my swim cap and goggles.

"Get into position," the announcer says on the megaphone

I bend over, with my dominant leg in front with my toes curling over the edge of the board, and my arms and hands in front of me gripping onto the board.

"Take your mark" they announce

"You got this Bitch!!" I hear Cass yell.

"That's our girl!" both of my Pops' say while waving their sign about.

"Go Y/N!" The Turtle Bros, Splinter, and April shout

But the voice that mattered the most to me yelled "Go Aquatina!" Shouted Donnie. His voice made my heart race and my mind focused on winning.

The horn blares with the signal for us to start, I push off the board with my legs and arms propelling me, I dive into the pool gracefully and start to swim. I glide through the water effortlessly and I'm in the lead, coming to the end of the pool I flip over and start swimming back. I look to my right and see a rival competitor coming in hot, picking up the pace more determined than ever I reach my hand out and touch the pool wall. Pulling my head out of the water I hear cheering and clapping.

"The winner is Y/N L/N" the announcer's voice booms over the megaphone. I smile widely and shake the hands of the other swimmers before I pull myself out. I make sure to make eye contact with Donnie and he smiles at me. The rest of the competition goes on then it's my turn again for the 100-meter freestyle (which is swimming back and forth 4 times or two laps) which I also win, last but not least is the hardest swim ever which requires a ton of endurance the 500-meter (which is 20 laps). The announcer asks for volunteers to hold a countdown sign that is waterproof to put underwater for the swimmers to keep count of what laps they are on. April pushes Donnie and tells him to go volunteer to be my counter.

Donnie's POV

Exquisite, absolutely beautiful, such grace she has while she cuts through the water like a knife slicing through a block of butter. Oh, how I can watch her for hours on end.

"Man she's a fast swimmer, I think she might be part turtle," Mikey says jokingly

Donnie rolled his eyes, but his imagination went a bit wild with this statement. Thinking of the possibilities if she had become mutated would she swim as gracefully still?

April ends up pushing me to grab the countdown, looking back at her wasn't my proudest moment of me stuttering and stumbling. Bad boy image 0 April Well....who needs to count. But I make my way to where Aqua's part of the pool, grabbed the counter, and place it on my lap with the numbers facing her. I try my best to put on a supportive but unbothered facial expression. She waves shyly back as she stretches.

Aqua POV

I see Donnie on the other side of the pool holding the counter, seeing him wave at me makes me fluster and I wave back a bit awkwardly and decide to stretch to distract myself. Soon the announcer states its time to start the match, stepping onto the diver block I get into position, and looking up from under my long eyelashes I see Donnie, I look to my right seeing my family and the turtle bros, I take a deep breath and exhale, I start to focus and cancel out all the sounds, I can hear my heart beating in my ears. My pops' are taking tons of pictures and the gang was shouting my name. The blaring of the horn snaps me out of my zone briefly and I dive into the pool, taking my time to conserve my energy I start a bit slow, I get to Donnie's end of the pool as I flip over to get ready to swim to the other side we make eye contact and he gives me a thumbs up. I continue swimming and he starts putting the countdown sign in the water when I start to get higher up in the numbers. I could see the other swimmers start to falter and tire a bit but I was still feeling amazing.

I hear a bell ringing signaling the final laps, now Donnie was on all fours leaning over the edge of the pool with the sign shaking it excitedly. I giggle to myself and start to pick up speed once it's the final lap I kick it into overdrive and reach the other side. I touch the pool wall at the same time as the rival school swimmer. I try to regulate my breathing to calm myself down, pulling off my goggles I shake the hands of the other competitors and pull myself out of the pool. As soon as I'm out I get tackled by Mikey with a big hug and excited chatter. I laugh and hug him back soon the rest of the gang catches up and Raph gives me a head pat, Leo gave me a fist bump, April gave me a hug and Splinter gave me an approving nod.

The coaches and announcers review the videotape, and soon the results are in. It was a tie! I smile brightly and Donnie walks over to us, running over to him in excitement I jump into his arms and hug him tightly, we spin around as I almost knock him over. We both chuckle, we hear so "Oooooo's" from behind us and quickly separate. Hiding my blushing cheeks with my hands and he hides his face with his hoodie. An origami ninja paper flies towards me, I quickly catch it and see a note on it and some money. The sun is starting to set and it was beautiful.

"Go have fun with your friends" it read and I smile knowing they probably had to go back to the store.

"Let's go get some pizza!!" I say excitedly

I feel a bit of cramping but ignore it until April grabs my hand and pulls me to the locker room. She stuffs me into a bathroom stall and I notice some blood running down my legs.

"Oh my god I'm dying," I say nervously

April does her best to calm me down, but I laugh saying that I know what's happening thanks to the very awkward conversation with both my pops' PowerPoint presentation and all. I roll my eyes thinking about it, April thankfully came in clutch with pads and Tampons. Donnie was awkwardly texting April asking if I'm ok as he was thankfully the only one to notice the blood and quickly washed away the blood with pool water. He discreetly sends S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N with some painkillers that he made himself which I side eye but I trust him so I take them. April leaves to let the gang know I'll be done soon. After getting myself situated, I leave the locker room and walk over to the gang.

"There's our winner" Leo says

"You were amazing Y/N, I mean Aqua" Mikey says while looking at Donnie as he types away on his phone.

Donnie blushes a bit but rolls his eyes and scoffs.

"Yep, it's a nickname we came up with" I say while shrugging

"Very fitting indeed" Splinter says agreeing

We start walking out of the school and making way to the pizza restaurant. Ordering our pizza, grabbing the many boxes, by the time we walk out of the shop it's dark. We climb down a man hole and march to the lair.

"Hey....so, do you want a victory ride to the lair?" Donnie says while rubbing the back of his neck.

His voice startled as we were in a comfortable silence as we walked. I turn to him and see his hoodie isn't covering his face anymore, punching his shoulder I agree to a victory flight.

He starts up his flight she'll, I hop on the seat with his help, we take off and I shriek with excitement.

"Victory screech!" I shout

Thankfully the sewage pipes were huge so we were able to get a few loops in and land infront of the lairs front door. I jump off, Donnie inputs the code and I skip inside. Donnie quickly goes into his Lab grabs me a comfy blanket and a heating pad, I'm sitting in one of the two seater beanbags. Handing them to me I tear up a little and accept them.

"I had these just in case for April, I also have extra snacks but now I should add your favorites into the mix as well." He days while avoiding contact.

Everyone else joins us we open the pizza, Leo goes into the kitchen and tosses me a soda pop which I catch. Opening it up I take a big gulp and continue to eat my slices of pizza. April sits next to me and the boys are arguing on what Jupiter Jim movie we should watch and we just laugh while they fight.

"Man I love you guys" I say quietly and April pokes my cheek.

"Love you too girly" she says.

#rottmnt #rottmnt donatello #rottmnt x reader #rise donatello #rottmnt fanfiction #rise donnie #rise of the tmnt #donnie x reader

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dinos-are-cool-posts · 2 years ago

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My dad: *thinks it's silly that I think I might be autistic*

Also my dad: *will just decide to spend hours sitting and organizing things (colored pencils, fishing lewers, ect), wears only camo green grey and brown, will make fun of me when I don't get sarcasm but HE DOESN'T GET IT 50% OF THE TIME EITHER, and stims in various ways when frustrated or overstimulated*

#my dad does some shit #things my dad has said with no context

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gmanmedias · 1 year ago

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BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME

📹 📹 📹

🔫 🔫 🔫

⛓️ ⛓️ ⛓️

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lumin-au · 29 days ago

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Call of Duty Multiplayer Basic Builds

I want to share with you guys something I have softly tweaked\made over the past few Call of Duty games. This is my general custom loadout template I use for each game. I've cleaned up a little yesterday in hopes that it's relevant for COD Black Ops 6. The idea for them is the below:

Each loadout is tailored for very different playstyles. You can't just be running and gunning the same way with all of them. Keeps the game interesting and makes it easier to switch to what your team might need given the objective.

Each loadout is focuses on type of guns, not individual guns themselves. That way you can constantly be leveling up and getting camo challenges for each gun, and then swap them out with the same type while still sticking to the general premise of the loadout.

I do have quite a few other loadouts that I've played around with, slight tweaks and more focus on versatility. I might post them in the future if I find any more particularly unique. 1. Navy SEALs (Commando)

Primary: Assault Rifle (suggested: Suppressor, Reflex Sight, Tactical Foregrip)

Secondary: Silenced Handgun

Perks: Stealth Abilities

Equipment: Smoke Grenade

Lethal: Frag Grenade

Playstyle: Focus on covert ops. Moving through maps slowly and silently taking alternative paths to your teammates, taking out enemies without revealing your position. Ideal for flanking and surprise attacks.

2. Delta Force (Assault and Recon)

Primary: Battle Rifle (suggested: Red Dot Sight, Laser, Extended Mags)

Secondary: Launcher

Perks: Protection and Ammo focused

Equipment: Flashbang (for breaching)

Lethal: C4 (for objectives or vehicles)

Playstyle: Front-line fighter, pushing objectives and clearing paths for your team. This loadout can handle both close-quarters and mid-range combat with the ability to disable enemy air support.

3. Spetsnaz (Support & Suppression)

Primary: Light Machine Gun (Suggested: Bipod, Extended Mags, Compensator)

Secondary: Shotgun (for close-quarters protection)

Perks: That assist in camping.

Equipment: Trophy System (to protect from enemy grenades)

Lethal: Proximity Mine\Claymore (for securing areas)

Playstyle: Focus on immobile area suppression and control. Hold down key positions with sustained fire, providing cover for teammates or denying enemy access to objectives.

4. British SAS (CQC Specialist)

Primary: SMG (suggested: Suppressor, Quickdraw, Laser Sight)

Secondary: Combat Knife (for fast takedowns)

Perks: Movement Primary, Stealth Secondary

Equipment: Flashbang (to disorient enemies)

Lethal: Throwing Knife (silent kills)

Playstyle: Ideal for fast-paced, indoor and tight corridor combat. Push hard into enemy territory, disorient with flashbangs, and eliminate targets in close-range encounters with speed and precision.

5. Army Rangers (Assault)

Primary: Assault Rifle (suggested: ACOG Scope, Foregrip, Flash Hider)

Secondary: Handgun

Perks: Protection and Equipment buff

Equipment: Stim Shot (for quick healing)

Lethal: Frag Grenade

Playstyle: Balanced across all combat scenarios, excelling in holding objectives, engaging at mid-range, and providing steady support to your team.

6. Canadian Joint Task Force 2 (Special Ops)

Primary: Marksman Rifle (suggested: Variable Zoom Scope, Bipod, Extended Mags)

Secondary: Compact SMG

Perks: Stealth & 2 Primary Weapons

Equipment: Smoke Grenade (conceal movement or sniping spots)

Lethal: Proximity Mine\Claymore (for protecting your sniping location)

Playstyle: Focus on overwatch and long-range engagements while remaining mobile enough to relocate when necessary. The compact SMG ensures you aren’t defenseless in close quarters.

7. Australian SASR (Special Air Service Regiment)

Primary: Battle Rifle (suggested: ACOG Scope, Extended Barrel, Foregrip)

Secondary: Shotgun

Perks: Mobility\Visibility\Stealth

Equipment: Concussion Grenade

Lethal: Semtex (sticky grenade for tactical destruction)

Playstyle: Great for methodical, precise engagements. Use your battle rifle to dominate medium- to long-range combat, while keeping your shotgun ready for room-clearing or surprise close-range fights.

#Call of Duty #Codbros #Video Games #Article

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