#cal hcs

[slantosdoom]

random hc but cal 100% plays LPS with his little sister

sometimes when cal’s family isn’t home andre comes over and they use them as little action figures.

i can see them jokingly reenacting their plans for zero day through the littlest pet shops and laughing like idiots.

sometimes they pick a specific LPS to be brad hoff just so they can have the other ones jump him 😭😭

[sillyhahasilly]

caldre would never label their relationship or call each other bfs in the canon timeline. sure they would kiss and fuck and flirt but cal and andre are only ever cal and andre.

[treasure-goblin]

hmmm I feel like I kinda know a lot about you ! but here are my hcs anyway .D

you have short , blond curly hair

your voice is kinda deep and you’re really good at singing

when you were younger , you really liked gymnastics

you don’t like peppers

These are all based on vibes so I could be totally off

DUUUUUUUDE YOU ARE SOOOOO CLOSE WTF /POS

[sillyhahasilly]

cal told andre that when they die they'll come back and fuck w any of the people on their kill list that survived (which ended up being practically all) and andre js rolls his eyes, not believing that they are gonna die or be able to come back.

the first time they tried the oujia board, cal tried to contact past dead school shooters 😭😭. andre made comments making fun of them about how their endeavors practically failed (hint hint the columbine guys) and THATS when the planchette moved. it made andre laugh his ass off but cal freaked tf out.

cal 1000000% believes in ghosts while andre is the biggest skeptic. they bought an ouiji board to test in andre's basement. it moved, but andre refuses to believe it was anything other than cal moving it around with his fingers. still, cal tries to convince him with bloody mary or charlie charlie, but none of them ever work.

[calwasfound]

heart of the sea

[stealingpotatoes]

random thought of the day: do you think Cordova braided Cere's hair or do you think she did it herself?

Then did Cere try to do the same for Trilla?

sorry i need 5-7 business days to recover from thinking abt trilla and cere for 12 seconds

[cubiclez]

RANDOM ZERO DAY HCS

TW/CW: SH & GORE: ones that are about this will be in italic

more will be added to this list eventually! updated 12/15/24

-andre is chronically ill in some way. he’s often getting sick and he has days where he throws up often. he refuses to have anyone care for him though, as he feels like he’s independent enough.

-cal experiments with fire. he used to start fires in his backyard when he was a young teenager but after his mom caught him & gave him a lecture about it, he resorted to starting them out in the field before or after shooting with andre.

-andre will wear the same three outfits, while cal has a problem with owning too many clothes, specifically band tees.

-andre’s good in science and history, while cal prefers english for the poetry and writing aspect. they both can’t do math, but andre is somewhat better than cal so he copies off of him, whether andre likes it or not.

-cal and his siblings had a hamster growing up. they probably named it something basic like ‘buddy’, and when it died they buried it in a shoebox and had a funeral for it.

-somewhere in the kriegman household, there are photos of mel sleeping in andre’s bed with him when he was younger.

-speaking of mel, she’s woke the boys up before at a sleepover by jumping on them and trying to get their attention. when they finally got up, turns out she just wanted to be fed.

-rachel is a great artist and often draws portraits and eyes. she’s tried to get cal to stay still for her so she could draw him. cal claims it ‘doesn’t look like him’ to tease her.

-modern-day rachel is also the type to own a flickr, tumblr or pinterest account to post her photos. they would usually be of nature, drawings, her and her friends, sunsets, and outfits.

-rachel has a german shepherd and/or a shih tzu. she also posts tons of photos of her pets.

-if cal lived long enough to witness the peak of gore sites, he would have a big, bulky laptop infected with viruses from visiting them. andre would also watch gore with him and give tons of commentary as he’s watching, while cal just stares.

-sometimes, when everyone’s asleep, cal goes into a dissociative state where he doesn’t feel like he’s real. he’s numb and is almost convinced he can’t feel pain. in response to this he will cut. he does it on his thighs and forearms. he also burns himself if he doesn’t have a blade.

-andre knows about cal’s sh, but cal didn’t tell him. he found out. it confused him a little when he first found out, but he’s still learning how to understand it.

-andre listens to classic rock and some german artists. he’s not too deep into the music scene as cal is, so cal’s always on his ass about ‘name three songs.’

-cal smokes weed before school sometimes. when he can’t do that, he’ll skip class to smoke. he does it out of a water bottle, and andre thinks it’s disgusting and tells him to ‘just get a bong or a pipe if he’s gonna do that’.

-andre has tried thc once with cal. he didn’t like it as he felt it made him ‘too aware and too nervous’. however he will take cbd as a pain reliever.

-cal has done, or at least considered doing shrooms. he knows a few people who can get him some, and the days leading up to zero day make him think ‘i might as well, before i die’.

-andre takes quick, cold showers. cal’s in there for an hour with the water steaming hot. he’s nearly passed out from it, multiple times.

-cal draws on the desks in school all the time. his desk is covered in drawings and it only gets more and more filled as the days go on, because the teachers just gave up on telling him to stop.

-rachel has a couple friends that rebel more than her, so she’s coined as the ‘innocent one’ or the ‘goody two-shoes’. she’s still popular nonetheless, but known as the nice girl.

-modern day cal is a white monster junkie. sometimes he gets the original flavour too.

-it broke rachel’s heart when she found out about cal’s sh. cal never intended to tell anyone, but over time he got a bit too comfortable and accidentally let the fact slip out in conversation. she was scared and after that she would always double-check to make sure cal was okay. cal didn’t know how to accept her kind words, and i like to think he died still not fully believing she cared.

-cal and andre getting their hands on the first sims game once it came out. they’d make brad huff, giving him the ugliest and most overdramatized features. they’d make each other, too. they’d argue when they get to see the reveal of their characters, but it’s the funniest thing ever at the same time. the night ends off with them making their own sims and brad’s sim fight and other shenanigans.

-andre’s lips get chapped easily causing them to peel, so he developed a habit of biting the skin off.

-cal’s hands are always cold. like, concerningly cold. he’ll put his hand on andre’s arm randomly sometimes and make him jump. it catches him off guard and pisses him off every time.

[sillyhahasilly]

THANK YOU!! THIS IS SO GOOD

physical affection hcs?? not nsfw, unless u want to, but cuddling and shit.

of course! can be read as romantic or platonic

andre

he is really really really awkward when it comes to physical affection with someone he isn’t really close with

he won’t initiate anything on his own

if you ask him to be more physically affectionate, he’d like give you a side hug

HOWEVER the closer you get with him the more comfortable he’d be with physical contact

he doesn’t like pda tho…

he would give short hugs, keeps his arm on your shoulder but that’s about it for public

in private? different story

he likes the feeling of someone laying on top of him, the pressure feels nice to him (coughcoughautism)

deep down he loves being little spoon but he has to be REALLY comfortable with u to even ask

if you like giving random kisses and ur only friends he’d feel a bit weird at first but he’d get used to it

he ends up even liking the quick pecks on his cheek as a greeting!

tbh i think of everything he likes holding hands the most

it’s just so simple and ur close n touching but ur also at a distance

his hands are a tad bit sweaty tho

cal

he is way more physically affectionate but it’s not overbearing yknow

arm around the waist is his favorite way to hold u i just know it

the type to walk up behind u and wrap his arms around u with his chin on ur head/shoulder

if ur equally/more affectionate he doesn’t mind at all! he quickly adapts

u like greeting w tight hugs? he can do that

he doesn’t care about pda, he’s not obnoxious about it but he does it

in private he cannot keep his hands off u

if ur watching tv or a movie he is cuddling up into you and he dozes off so now ur trapped

he gives hand kisses without thinking

speaking of kisses… if ur just friends and u like showing affection through pecks he literally doesn’t mind

might tease u a bit

“if u wanted to makeout u could just ask”

he has cold hands he WILL make u hold his hand when and whereever

[levemetal]

Dual calamities Qijiu AU save me.... save me Dual Calamity Qijiu...

Yes they are wearing each other's former coats/outer layer and tons of matching accessory and garment pieces why do you ask

Details under the cut/Rambling ahead

Dual calamities AU, post pidw. SJ kills himself on the shards of Xuan Su by swallowing them. Qijiu end up entwined into one ghost amalgamation, their combined regrets hatred spite and resentment and everything creating a nearly supreme/calamity level ghost. They go off indiscriminately murdering in the demon realm in a mindless unaware rampage, consuming ghosts and demons alike and becoming stronger until they are strong enough to be aware once more.

Luo Binghe becomes aware of the new calamity too late, due to his distraction with the Bingge vs Bingmei extra happenings, and ends up regretting it as he fails to catch up to them time and time again, despite attempting to chase down the new calamity that slaughtered half the demons in a mindless rage.

It could go down the Bingqijiu path or be simply Qijiu retreating somewhere to live in peace. Maybe being annoyed later on by Hua Cheng and/or He Xuan, maybe even Bai Wuxiang once. They kick Qi Rong off a mountain once, when he comes to annoy them for the title only to prove that is not a calamity (unfortunately for him, ily stinky green ghost). SJ is gonna have the time of his life roasting his ass. Qi Rong will leave both in pieces and tears.

Their only disadvantage really is that they cannot seperate too much, physically. But I imagine after being in each other's brains after the soul merge they don't particularly care to be (nor would they want to be. This is Qijiu we're talking about.) It's Qijiu's codependant dream. Xuan Su sewed them together and actually they are very very codependant and possessive after everything so this is just fine. They probably even have a Xuan Su blood weapon, that heeds both their commands and calls. While fighting they synchronise, with YQY being the strength and SJ the brains.

I imagine YQY is able to conjure the arrows that pierced him as spiritual projectiles, and SJ chains that bound him in the water prison. Their strength was cultivated by absorbing and devouring other ghosts and demons.

@ace-shenanigans came up with the lovely title "jade dragon stalks bamboo" which is a much better title than I could ever hope to come up with. Thank you for listening to my mad ramblings

I've been wanting to draw and think on this for a while, of how grotesque to make the initial ghost + the later higher cultivation form. But basically the kiln and everything would count them as one ghost, probably a dual title too. They'd be like a myth amongst the realms, retreating to a comfortable mountain peak with bamboo, occassionally off to hunt down slavers.

[bisexualmcqueen]

(sketch dump) they do bite

part of a headcanon non (@/youhavehitawall) has where basically racers get to look extra badass and have fangs. ive adopted the hc also now. biting and attacking etc etc

[calilk]

GEHDBISHENDJHD GRIAN WE ARE SORRY

[sillyhahasilly]

this might be controversial but I don't think modern day caldre would shoot up their school. I js think they'd be really fucking annoying and regular mentally ill.

[treasure-goblin]

Headcanon!

You like your hair loose as they're fun to shake around and play with

Ooooh that's mostly correct!

Yall are supposed to be giving me headcanons, not facts about me /lh /j

[soelvfiskart]

[operationandre]

WAIT. Before you give up on headcannoning, what are you’re thoughts on what would happen if they both succeeded in fleeing the country

okay so... andre canonically planned enough that he has fake ids and money and all that shit. i think cal is a brilliant thief, enabling him to steal snacks and drinks from gas stations. he would even go so far to take more than they need, piling things in all of his pockets.

andre would shave his head while cal just cuts his hair. andre said they'd look too suspicious and easy to point out if they both had buzz cuts. cal would also dye it a darker color with dye they stole from a small store they stopped in.

the boys would have filled the car up with gas before zero day, at least andre would have. he'd have a full tank of gas that's ready to go the moment he needs it. they'd be driving as fast as they can without being pulled over.

if they ended up making it to mexico, andre would most likely get a job while cal would stay somewhere that he could keep an eye on the news. neither of them would go in public much; they know that people won't stop looking for them.

they'd make it for a while, but they'd probably get caught with guns and knives on them. they'd get arrested and extradited back to connecticut.

[hetfieldlvr]

SOME OF MY ZERO DAY HEAD CANNONS🤓☝️ (they are real bad and random)

—————————————

- andre probably had some type of jealousy at cals ‘attractiveness’ but he wouldn’t say anything.

-when andre and cal would have sleepovers, whoever’s house they were in the guest would be forced to sleep on he floor (ex: when they slept at andre’s house, andre would make cal sleep on the floor while andre would be cozied up in bed)

-andre got bullied more than cal but andre would just be pissed over it and cal would have a total crash out, EVEN THO CAL DOESNT GET BULLIED A WHOLE LOT.

-cal has tried to get andre and rachel to be friends once but when he left the room they sat there waiting for him to come back and when he did they began to talk again.

-rachel thought cal was gay for andre for a little bit.

-andre hates doing presentations. not because he’s nervous but because he hates everyone in his classes.

-when andre said he wanted to shoot up the school for the very first time cal was like 😲

-if Ark was made in the 2000s, cal would play it and andre would clown on him for it.

-cal would order pizzas to ‘bother’ andre but andre does NOT care🙅‍♀️ (cuz he making money🤑)

-every time cal would do something weird, andre would ignore it because he either does not care, didnt really process what he said, or thinks that cal says this type of shit all the time.

-andre would pretend to throw punches at cal but he would use so much force that sometimes he actually does punch him and he would say “oops” and try not to laugh.

-when andre would drink like a coke or something and he has to burp, he taps on cals shoulder and when cal looks at him he would burp in cals face🙁

-when cal would think about shooting himself on zero day he would get sad at how he wouldn’t be able to talk to andre when he’s dead.

-i’m sure younger people (freshmen, and sophomores) would have a hallway crush on andre and cal.

-andre was considering if he should hang out with cal, after people called them fags for being together so much.