#but...... i'm not sure they're zero. and it WOULD be very funny

[blatantprinterpropaganda]

i'm actually dead at this. WHY did i not expect him to barge into the room and immediately confess that he was kidnapped by a vampire. of COURSE this guy would do that, what else would he be doing

[euclydya]

... If all goes well we might've switched Mains again. Yippee????!!

[autisticshadowthehedgehog]

predictions now that the trailer is out:

the intro makes it look like they go back to sonic's old cave for something. i wonder what it is

they jump out of a plane too. we NEED a "no food or movies" quip

when shadow says "you're a colorful bunch" he seems... confused? like he's not sure what's going on. makes me remember he probably hasnt seen another mobian before AND he has no context as to who these people who look like him are

sonic's getting lied to about what happened on the ark, or just straight-up not told until late in the movie

and dont worry guys we know they're pulling SOMETHING. we see a shot of shadow and gerald over maria's body while soldiers point guns at them so yeah i think the us military still killed her

the chao garden in tokyo seems like a cute ref to there being an actual irl chao garden in japan in sonic x

tom and/or maddie knocked out of commission, which causes sonic to go against GUN and get robotnik. in all the scenes with robotnik/stone there's NO implication that GUN let sonic do this and considering the robotnik family history with the ark....

iirc we saw "i found you faker" on a leaked merch package so let's get that entire scene pls

ivo "because i'm one of the idiots who lives in it" robotnik

as i said in another post, they have jessica mcfucking jones in this movie and her character got ZERO screentime in the trailer and only ONE promo image with her in it. which implies she may be doing something spoilery. like idk being an undercover nocturnal flying mammal

in relation: shadow's either working with GUN traitors or the "gerald" figure. we see missiles heading for team sonic's meeting with the commander, so it's not GUN sending the missiles and robotnik's out of commission soooo where else would shadow get those bombs

shadow: it's just me and my very real and alive grandpa gerald against the world

the totally real and alive grandpa gerald: hey grandson ivo push this button labelled "eclipse cannon" it'll be really funny i promise

also guys he's not robotnik's dad instead of grandpa in this. he calls him "pop pop" that's something people call their grandpas

IF gerald is alive and not an illusion/ai/whatever he's been alone for 50 years and is gonna be sooo sane about it. but we DO know there's a 50yr timeskip considering the last credits scene so it'd be very strange for him to uhhh still be kickin

that quill is becoming metal sonic and the midcredits scene will be a sonic heroes bit

[ruegarding]

Wait what's the tea on Wotg makin' Percabeth even worse? /gen /nf

tldr; rick is continuing his trend of having annabeth imply that she thinks her bf is stupid (u can see what i mean by trend here). this is coupled w a lot of ableism: acting like percy is too stupid to function and removing annabeth's disabilities so she can be a girl boss while refusing to address their mental health. this is supposed to make percabeth look cute, somehow, but instead comes off as mean-spirited at best.

first, to establish context, percy's incredibly overworked,

(he's also on the swim team) and bc of this percy is falling asleep in class and waking up in a panic. this is never addressed seriously despite being a series abt disability. as if that wasn't enough, percy also is never shown to enjoy any of his classes and is frequently written to be stuggling w his grades, just in case u forgot he was stupid (he also is written w the ableist stereotype of being lazy abt school work, too, instead of, you know, disabled). his main motivation is that annabeth will be successful with or without him so he better not be a stupid failure.

completely ignoring percy was the one who wanted to go to nru. also, zero mentions for the accommodation percy is receiving for his disabilities (nor annabeth's, but she's written like they don't exist so).

and then percy says that annabeth's friend, hana, doesn't like him bc she doesn't think he's good enough for annabeth, going on to think yeah that's fair. this is never addressed bc it's supposed to be a cute percabeth and #girl boss annabeth moment. then percy makes a joke (?) that annabeth's friends are gossiping abt how annabeth can stand to date him when he's too stupid to understand architecture when percabeth walks away to talk. this is not a percabeth win and i'm genuinely not sure how anyone on rick's team thought it was.

then there's this:

just in case u forgot, percy is the stupid one and annabeth is the smart one. teehee.

and, in relation to ignoring their mental health, annabeth talks abt putting spider webs all over hecate's mansion (bc she wants to make a haunted house), which rick says is ok bc it's not spiders. except part of annabeth's huge traumatic fight w arachne was being covered in spiderwebs that literally pulled her into tartarus. so. weird plotline. similarly, percy has a bit abt having nightmares abt cereberus, which is equally stupid. i talked abt it here. not necessarily percabeth but worth mentioning for context. oh, and percy also bodily-fluid-bends later in the book w no comment except annabeth's shocked expression. correction: while percy does bodily-fluid-bend w no fanfare, annabeth is not there. percy poison-bends in front of annabeth w no comment.

rick then keeps poking fun at how percy and annabeth would make great parents. which. they're seventeen. btw. but yeah anyway percy would make a great dad bc he's got the funny dad jokes (bc he's stupid. haha get it). annabeth would make a great mom bc she's soooooo nurturing what w taking care of a puppy who decides to call her mom and taking care of her stupid idiot useless boyfriend. i wish this was a joke. more on this later.

the line "[annabeth] looked surprised—me comforting her, kind of switching things up" is self explanatory and written specifically to piss me off.

this passage,

which sucks for many reasons, but especially bc this is rick trying to rewrite book canon w show canon despite very easy ways to include this without acting like percy is an idiot who just didn't notice for the past THREE BOOK SERIES (like a war that took place recently where chiron was injured idk just an idea). instead, percy has to take the fall for rick's error and annabeth has to act like her bf is the stupidest person on earth.

btw, did i mention that annabeth is ahead in her classes and percy sucks at school? teehee.

wow, it's like annabeth's dyslexia isn't even there!

now, it may seem that i'm exaggerating percy's incompetence.

this is a real quote from the book.

so is this!

and this.

and—u get the point. rick is acting like percy hasn't outsmarted his opponents bc his personality is stupid and annabeth's personality is reduced down to having the brain cell.

then, percy has a moment where his empathy shines thru and he's allowed to succeed at something (for the first time in the book), except he has to put himself down to make annabeth feel better. bc we can't have percy feeling good abt himself since it makes annabeth look bad. or something. idk.

again, there is no exploration of percy's self-esteem or their myriad of trauma.

to make up for all the times percy was treated like an idiot, annabeth says percy is "a pretty smart guy,"

which is a surprise to her despite them having known each other for five years.

furthermore, rick is writing percy w a sort of incompetence towards household tasks that is, quite frankly, sexist. here is a good post on how it mirrors weaponized incompetence and here is another one abt the disturbing nature of mom-ifying annabeth. i should make it clear annabeth provides percy food in multiple scenes while percy does adjacent to nothing. she also tucks him into bed like a child in one scene and gets nicknamed "mom" by a dog that pees on her (AND she cleans up the pee while percy does nothing).

so, wottg is essentially 300 pages of mean-spirited bullying from all sides. none of the humor shines through these jokes, none of the facetiousness, like hey isn't it funny that percy is really smart but sometimes completely oblivious, is there. there is no comedic disparity between percy's power and skill and his ability to trip over his feet bc there are no impressive feats of power and skill (anything that would count are immediately brushed off). comments abt percy learning to tie his own shoes w his newfound octopus tentacles don't land in a book where he's acting like he cannot have thoughts without annabeth. and there's no grace to be given bc at no point in any of this handled as a serious exploration of percy's insecurities despite the ample opportunity to do so.

then, when percy isn't being hounded w vitriol, annabeth is being reduced to a sexist caricature of a woman. it does not make percabeth look good in any way.

finally, i need to make it clear that however bad this breakdown makes the books seem, it is worse. i summarized and skipped over a ton of stuff for my own sanity.

[emcapi-gaming]

i am back on my tinfoil hat bullshit

ok so i know "x is a shard of y" theories are totally overdone but unfortunately i have a very specific flavor of autism that makes me go bonkers over similarities between characters

and i will be honest i'm putting a lot less stock in this one than the Wuk Lamat/Sphene theory in terms of how sure I am that I'm right, but! hear me out! (also even if this turns out to be absolutely nothing, i may still roll with it as a headcanon just for fun :3)

"but emcapi," you say, "they literally just look alike because they're both face 4 fem elezen!"

yes, i do fully admit this one might just be a coincidence!

but it's a really fun coincidence :D

additional points (thank you, Garland Tools, for enabling my tinfoil-hatting):

exact same iris color

exact same lipstick color

same bangs! (which I honestly didn't even realize until I put them side by side)

Now, narratively, this would actually explain a great deal about Shale getting pulled into the Main Character Squad at lightning (har har) speed. Which is that, specifically, I'm 97.5% sure that our next expac is going to be a joint Meracydia/Southern Seas + Void expansion.

Why I'm so convinced:

Fits with "patches playing setup for the second-next expac" pattern: see also, Doman refugees in ARR patches -> Stormblood, Warriors of Darkness in HW patches -> Shadowbringers.

We have very obviously not seen the last of Zero (I MISS MY WIFE, TAILS)

We are SOOOOOO obviously going to Meracydia it's not even funny.

It's like the only destination on Emet-Selch's itinerary we still haven't hit up.

AND we had all that business with the Milallas coming from the South Seas, and using the Mysterious Hourglass to do it, which OBVIOUSLY warrants some investigation.

Huuuge connection between Meracydia + Void via the war with the Allagans (which is how Azdaja got stuck in the Void in the first place)

With the context of all the other hints, specifically having Cloud of Darkness as the first chaotic raid is making me go 🤔🤔🤔 another hint, perhaps?

IN CONCLUSION: i have max brainrot debuff stacks BUT i am definitely on to something with the next expac, and i am either on to something or have made a VERY fun new headcanon with Shale and Cyella/Cylva.

[flickering-nightfall]

Watcher Thoughts

Spoilers for everything!

This is a shortened version of a much longer essay where I jotted down all my thoughts about the campaign. This is still pretty long, but hopefully it’s digestible enough.

Gameplay

Loved the initial twist. Was disappointed that we'd have another repeat with the siblings for a second. I love them but after eight campaigns, I was ready for something new. I'm not put off about not having another iterator (yet? I’m not counting Prince) either. It would have been neat, but exploring different stuff instead is good.

Got stuck a couple times, as I didn't understand what I was supposed to do to progress. I had fun exploring the regions, but exploring the majority of the first three with no idea of what to do next was frustrating. It wasn't even about story progression either - I just wanted to see more regions! But region and creature discovery felt very rewarding at least.

Portal placements were pretty wack and regions felt disconnected - you've probably heard it all already at this point. Some improvements like portal markers on the map will help (I'm certain that they'll either add it officially, or someone will make a mod). I avoided playing any region mods before this to keep things fresh, so I have zero context for any of these places. They're certainly very pretty at least.

Story

Droplets forming ripples in the water…? Yes there's a stray pixel in one frame. I made this from a spritesheet, it's not my fault, I swear

Although I would have preferred something different, I respect that the devs wanted to explore new and frankly wild routes. If it were me, I probably would have done a rare working transit system or something. Keep things grounded, group the new regions by theming so that you can at least connect them to each other. (Like Badlands + Rusted Wrecks + Torrid Desert.) I would have liked exploring ideas like scavenger societies or new biome lore instead of... rift walking through time and space madness. But I can't deny it was fun!

I really enjoyed Spinning Top (the echo), I think they’re very funny. I’m not bothered by them being able to move around - Two Sprouts, Twelve Brackets kinda imply they can too, at least enough to watch the tunnels of Subterranean. Maybe it depends on the echo too.

The decision to make a proper, repeated character out of an echo was interesting. Though I’m on the fence about the demystification of echoes and ascension. I do like Spinny’s arc and their story, and it gave me strong feelings to see them finally choose to move forward. I liked what they had to say, in terms of more lore for the ancients, their own character, and also in their final scene. 

Being tethered to the world by the sorrow of realizing you weren't loved in the way you should have been loved. Craving a warmth you can see but never feel again. The concept of peace after long-lived suffering. Able to move on because you had someone at your side, someone who cared enough to keep coming back to you, even if it was just a silent, peeping little creature. It resonated with me.

The purpose of the ending confused me at first. I thought Watcher playing with the toys was an example of their personality, maybe - distant, relatively unaffected by the events that just unfolded. And maybe that’s still true, but the emphasis on the spinning top in the campaign select screen… I’m not sure what yet, but playing with the echo’s namesake, their former beloved toys… there was something there.

I feel weird about Watcher being able to influence the world physically. I thought the point of echoes was that they were ghosts unable to interact with the physical plane. Only able to provide a bit of enlightenment for slugcat with their presence - stuck between one world and the next. Unless it’s all a dream (a trope I dislike and partially assign to Saint anyways), or Watcher is not quite an echo, in which case… hm.

Personally I'm tired of the rot, and I preferred it as a relatable and contained disease, rather than a sentient force that can corrupt worlds across time (and dimensions/timelines?). What they did with it was interesting, at least. You can explain it being Like That™ as a different strain of rot from Pebbles’, or it being because Watcher is a separate continuity. But it’s not about the explanation for me - it’s about the themes.

I enjoyed Prince as a character - I like the way they look, move and speak. But I didn’t get as attached as I could have due to my lukewarm feelings about rot stuff and Watcher’s rift powers in this DLC. Though, due to this campaign, I don’t know if I’ll keep headcanoning voidspawn as a lesser consequence (than echoes) of not being ready for ascension. The "stinging idiots" seem very intent on getting Watcher/echoes to finish crossing over into the next realm.

It seems like they want to portray the void as a force, to which the rot is the antithesis of. Prince spoke of wanting all life to go on forever, never lost - and then a force opposing its own. And it seems like that force may have won. I suppose all things must return to the cycle, or come to an end, eventually…

You can hear a single whispering iterator voice as you walk up to Prince’s puppet for the last time. That voice disappears after the karma flowers take over. Patches of them now bloom across all the regions. But the rot continues to spread! So hm I dunno what’s up with that.

Since they're adding more content later, I feel like they'll probably be character-centric threads too. Spinning Top and the Prince are probably two chapters in a broader anthology. I wonder where they’ll go from here. (Maybe a way I can unrot my save file? Haha.)

Regions

The art direction is great in my opinion. Some regions that stuck out to me:

Badlands (minus the locusts, they should really not see you while you’re invisible). The vibes are immaculate.

Torrid Desert. I usually find desert maps boring, but the sand dunes were a refreshing break from geometric tiling. In general, I really like breaks from the tile-based geometry. The first time I saw a scavenger templar/disciple (don’t remember which one) was a neat moment. I find the implications of those guys existing quite interesting.

Shrouded/Stormy Coast. Something about the warehouse crates and hanging platforms really tickled my fancy. I think the scale of it all, as well as the color provided from the crates, contributed to it feeling so good to me.

Desolate Tract: Conversely to the wavy desert dunes, this place being so flat, not boring due to the uniqueness of that, and backdropped by the wind tunnel really made me curious about this place. I hope they fix the bug that makes your FPS tank here though.

Outer Rim: Rife with secrets, both left and right. The desert portion reminded me of Kingdom Hearts' Keyblade Graveyard. Against all odds the scavengers continue to survive, and like in Torrid Desert they have strange, powered garb. Void-infused clothing? It’s interesting.

Ancient Urban: Even if I'll argue about ancient scaling forever, the actual presentation of this place was amazing. I was eating it all up and now I really want to get around designing my ancient OCs. You think it was named this as a nod to the popularized fandom term? Haha. 

Unfortunate Development: The dead coral corpse of Pebbles 2 electric boogaloo. The void worm is weird and all (is it rot-corrupted or just a faceless facsimile the rot created?), but I enjoyed the environment more. The background was a tesseract-like frame that stretched on seemingly forever. That was what really spooked me.

Brightness and contrast adjusted for viewing ease. Where is your head?

What are Starcatchers? They look iterator-like. Maybe it’s an alternate dimension thing, just as Signal Spires has the pyramid concept art iterators in the background? They could be structures that aren’t iterators, a different build type of them, or an alternate timeline, I guess. Starcatchers probably perform a function related to their name, regardless.

I remember before this DLC, some people interpreted iterator bricks as cylinders instead.

In the files Outer Rim also has a curving sky and a placeholder background where the earth is crumbling at the edge. And it’s literally called Outer Rim. Could also be a floating landmass, or sinking into the void sea, if you wanted to try out some other explanation. But I think that flat planet Rain World theory has some more evidence with this one. (I don’t think I can use flat planet RW for my space-involved AU but it is still interesting)

At the edge of the world...?

Someone (I think it was a reddit comment, I've been brain blasted with so much Watcher stuff that it's all starting to mix together) pointed out that spreading rot in the past doesn’t influence their future versions, so alternate dimensions aren’t out of the question. (Unless all regions are separate places - I wasn’t sure if places like Stormy Coast vs. Shrouded Coast were supposed to be the same or not. Or if the karma flowers kill the rot in the past, only for it to crop up again in the future and die again, but that seems overly convoluted.)

Time and space riftwalking shenanigans were already a lot - timelines/alt dimensions feel like quite a step further. In this case you are not following just the one “thread,” as Spinny puts it.

Final Thoughts

Initially I had a poorer reaction to Watcher's story, but some of it was defensiveness over the tone and headcanons I had come to like about RW and DP. After a few days of it settling in, I find myself warming up to Watcher more. I may have liked something different more, but I can enjoy and appreciate Watcher for what it is. 

If people can differentiate the canons of the DLCs (...it might be a little easier than vanilla vs. DP, because Watcher is so fantastical), I think I can have a fun time with both. 

Speaking of headcanons, giant ancients are pretty inconsistent with a lot of the environmental clues about ancient size, even the new regions within the DLC itself. I’ll post some stuff about it with screenshots and drawings later. 

Here's a couple of them...

I think literal hand puppet iterators are a good reminder that an iterator is more than its puppet. I can really imagine them as a giant machine waving a cute toy on a stick, a form more palatable for their audience. (Although that does make Moon being stuck in the PoV of one feel a little weirder too.) It emphasizes the way ancients likely thought of them as well. The concept is just neat.

However, I don't know if I would have fixated on iterators so hard without seeing puppets as more of a proper body. The superstructure is fantastic - but the puppet avatar makes it easier to identify with them as people and characters. The puppet being completely toylike rather than closer to a body-like vessel makes that a little more difficult. 

For a lot of stuff I’ve already written, especially interactions between ancient and iterator OCs, the size discrepancy is too much. So I just won’t adhere to giant ancients or tiny everything else hahaha

In general I mostly see myself using the snippets of ancient lore, region stuff, new creatures. If possible, I'd like to see what secrets can be uncovered about the new regions. 

I’m not interested in using stuff like the sentient rot when it comes to the continuities I more deeply engage with. My opinions may continue to evolve over time, we’ll see. But these are my thoughts after a few days of processing.

[lsunstreakerl]

Hiii Sunny! Maxiel and 32 for the ask game? (Hope you have a good day ❤️)

in the true nature of the tentacle verse this got longer than I meant it to. also, I'm not sure if the humor comes through as funny as it is in my head, but. please. it's funny. 1.7k words, alternating Max POV and Daniel POV.

heads up! this is the tentacle verse. nothing explicit but like. the verse as a whole is just. yeah.

Max is curled around the eggs, carefully cradled between his side and his tail. Charles is out hunting, even though Max is perfectly capable— and slightly better at it— because there's a runt in this brood, and he's been stressing about it.

Once they know what species it'll be, Max will be sure to get the aquarium set up for it. Charles still doesn't know about the aquarium, but Max thinks some secret keeping in their relationship is fair, considering he hadn't known about... pretty much anything, getting into it.

There's an uncomfortable twist in his chest, and Max shifts, flexing his nails against the sand underneath him, gills flaring. Nobody's stupid enough to come near the den— Max has made the consequences of that very clear.

It feels almost like a sneeze, and he wrinkles his nose, unsure about the mechanics of sneezing underwater—

------

He's dry.

Max's heart immediately picks up, eyes darting around the room frantically. He's not even sure—

He's on land. In a bed. His limbs don't feel right, and his hair is brushing against his forehead. He lifts a hand to push it out of the way, and the tanned skin staring back at him, the inked rose—

He screams.

------

Daniel's pretty fucking confident he hadn't taken anything weird in the last day or so. Definitely not anything strong enough for him to be having the dream he's having.

He's a mermaid. There's a bunch of little white squishy orbs in the curl of his tail, although it's not scaly or sparkly at all, which feels kind of unfair, honestly. He read somewhere that once you're aware of a lucid dream you can change it, but no amount of wishing makes the tail any cooler.

It reminds him of sharkskin. There's small brown spots all along the tail, traveling up his sides and across his arms, but it's weird.

He's pale.

More pale than he's been in his entire life. There are small, sturdy fins along his forearms, and his nails—

Daniel gets distracted looking at them, long and sharp, slightly hooked at the end. It's a weird dream for sure, especially when he feels up at his neck, the gentle fluttering of skin where water rushes in and out.

He'd never thought about the finer details of a mermaid before, so he's got to give props to his sleeping brain for creativity, although he's not so sure about the squishy things.

His first thought is that they're eggs, based on the small, sandy cradle he's wrapped around, but that doesn't seem right.

Daniel has zero aspirations of mermaid parenthood, even in his subconscious. That much he's confident about.

He tries flicking the tail slightly, finding it intuitive but difficult. There's a soft burble near a hole in the wall, and then something comes in.

Daniel screams.

------

Max probably looks like a crazy man, running outside barefoot, hoping with everything in him that this somehow hasn't happened.

He's Daniel.

He'd checked in all the ways that mattered— bathroom mirror, tattoo tour, phone unlocked with face ID, and helmet collection.

The driveway is hot against his feet. Normally it would burn, cause him to hop around and swear, but Daniel's been doing it his whole life, and the soles of his feet are tougher than Max's are.

He's in Australia.

With legs.

It's not like Daniel can magically turn into a fish or anything either, and Max grips his hands in his hair.

He's trying not to panic, it's just—

If Max is Daniel...

Well.

------

Daniel throws an egg at the intruder. There's plenty of fish bones around, he realizes a moment later, but the egg was nearby. It doesn't throw very well either, drifting through the water until a fucking tentacle wraps around it, carefully tucking it close to a lean chest.

Daniel picks up another egg in one hand, fishbone in the other, eyes narrowed.

The thing uncurls, still holding the egg protectively, and Daniel reconsiders his drug theory as Charles chitters at him through the water.

It's definitely the other driver— the hair, the facial structure, the arms— but the waist down is what has Daniel tripping out, all coiling tentacles and a soft glow.

Charles chitters at him again, sounding annoyed. There's a huge fish wrapped in one of the tentacles, clearly dead.

Daniel isn't sure if his imagination is this vivid.

An irritated trill, and then tentacles are speeding towards him, snatching the egg, the fishbone, and Daniel.

The egg goes back in the clutch, the fishbone gets dropped in the sand, and Daniel gets pulled above water.

"What the fuck? Why did you try to throw an egg at me?"

Charles sounds pissed, and also extremely confused, which is really not helping Daniel's situation any.

"So it is an egg. Are you still a mermaid, if it's tentacles?"

His own voice startles him, low and raspy. There's no trace of his accent, tongue and lips wrapping around the words in a way Daniel doesn't recognize.

Scratch that. He recognizes it, just not on him.

He's staring at Charles, mouth open. The other man eyes him weirdly.

"What, is there blood on my face? Seriously Max, you are acting weird, why the fuck are you throwing the eggs?"

He swallows.

"...Charles?"

His voice is quieter. He's...

He's not so sure he's dreaming.

------

Max takes a private flight. It's 20 hours he'll never get back, but he's panicking. Charles, the eggs—

He sighs in relief that Daniel won't remember any of it once they get him out of the water. He's pretty sure.

Ten hours later he bolts awake in the cabin, blanket stuck to him with sweat.

The memory loss is only because of the secretions, which only happens when—

------

Daniel wheezes, neck crushed by the tentacle wrapped around his throat. His limbs are pinned down in a way he's only seen once on a porn video he definitely hadn't meant to click on, and Charles looks like he wants to kill him.

His fingers twitch weakly as Charles hisses at him, small pointy teeth poking out when he curls his lip.

"How?"

Daniel has a small fear of dogs, and he is rapidly developing a very large fear of the ocean. Specifically squids.

The tentacle around his throat relaxes enough for him to speak, black dots dancing at the edge of his vision.

"Charles, it's me, Daniel."

Charles' eyes widen, and the death grip on Daniel relaxes slightly.

"Ricciardo?"

Daniel nods.

Charles' eyes narrow again, leaning in close to his face.

"Prove it."

He's wracking his brain, trying to figure out how he could possibly—

Oh.

"Vegas, at the Aria—"

The tentacle squeezes tighter again, and Charles' face goes pink.

"Right, yes, I believe you."

He lets go of Daniel, who immediately tries to scramble back a few feet, rubbing at his wrists to try and get blood flow back.

"So I'm... not dreaming."

Charles makes a face, thinking. He shrugs.

"Not necessarily. Some dreams are very vivid, yes?"

Daniel isn't sure that's how that works.

"But if I'm not dreaming— how—"

Charles moves lightning quick, a tentacle constricting around his throat and squeezing, leaving Daniel gasping, clawing for air.

"Shhhhh Daniel. Just a dream. A weird, terrible dream."

His vision is spotty, lungs burning.

The last thing he sees is Charles watching him with furrowed brows.

------

Max hadn't thought this far ahead. He's standing barefoot on the beach, in Daniel's body, and the den is completely inaccessible to a normal person.

Which Daniel is.

Charles is underwater with the eggs, so he doesn't have his phone.

Max winces, tapping at Daniel's phone screen and pulling up the keypad.

It rings once, twice.

"This is Arthur."

"Hey, it's Max. Verstappen. It's complicated. I need you to swim me back down to the den? Within regular people air time?"

"Max? You don't sound... okay, whatever. Are you at the beach?"

"Yes."

"I'll be there in five."

Arthur eyes him with extreme suspicion as he makes his way down into the private cove, hands in his pockets.

"Ricciardo."

Max sighs.

"Not Daniel. Me, Max. We are, uh. Body swapped, I assume."

Arthur's eyes widen.

"Seriously?"

Max holds his arms out in a shrug, lazily spinning in a circle.

"If I could shift gills and swim back down to the den myself, trust me, I would."

Arthur grins at him, canines slightly too sharp.

"Don't worry, I will be gentle. I hear there is a very broody shark that lives down there and likes to eat nosey neighbors."

There it is. Max groans, pulling off his shirt and tucking it under some rocks.

"It was one neighbor, and they were a little more than nosey—"

------

Max's lungs are burning by the time Arthur hauls him up into the air pocket of the den. Charles whips around, startled.

He's leaning over— oh, that's weird, Max doesn't like that— Max. Or Daniel. Daniel-as-Max. There's a shredded piece of fish in his hand.

Arthur blinks, slowly sinking back underwater.

"I will... leave you with that. Have fun."

He disappears with a quiet splash, and Max looks back over at Charles.

Daniel-as-Max is unconscious, dark bruises around his throat. Max makes a face.

"What the fuck?"

Charles winces.

"He thinks it is a dream! If I just keep him unconscious all the time, he will still think it's a dream!"

"So you strangled me? And now, what, you're force feeding him?"

Charles tosses his arms up, glaring.

"I don't see you with any better ideas. And you have left me alone with the eggs! I do not know how to brood, Max, that is the entire point of having you!"

Max rolls his eyes, kicking his feet idly in the water.

"Deadbeat."

"Excuse me—"

------

Daniel wakes up with a hangover that will be going in his personal hall of fame. His bed is rumbled, sheets halfway on the floor.

It smells like saltwater.

There's a phantom pain in his throat, but no bruising when he gingerly touches his fingers to his neck, and he's not in the outfit he remembers wearing the other night—

Mermaid. Charles.

He shudders, grabbing his phone. It's dead next to him, and the breeze is blowing in through his open window, curtains dancing lightly.

He makes a mental note to never take whatever the hell he did last night again.

His phone goes on the charger, and his clothes go in the hamper, and it's only when his screen lights back up that he seems missed messages asking why he'd been spotted barefoot in Monaco.

He wishes he had an answer. Having to chalk something up to a complete rager is something he's getting too old for, but—

He has no idea what else it could be.

[burningcheese-merchant]

It's so cool to see CRK getting popular again, it feels so refreshing like so much new quality fan content dropping that we couldn't even DREAM about a couple of months ago, but it hurts my very soul seeing new players being interested in beast x ancient ships, in their dynamics, asking is it okay to ship it and getting slapped in the face with another "IT'S ABUSER X VICTIM IT'S A PROSHIP IT'S A DARKSHIP" (which is just not true) killing off all the fun, bc apparently enemies to lovers, AUs and what-ifs doesn't exist anymore and everything that isn't pure fluff is illegal now. "IT'S NOT ENEMIES TO LOVERS, BEASTS ABUSED AND TORTURED THEM" yeah THAT'S WHAT ENEMIES DO??? What else do you expect from a villain honestly??? Like in ANY media??? Beasts still got their ass beat in the end as they totally deserve BECAUSE ANCIENTS ARE NOT SOFT INNOCENT SMALL BABIES THAT NEED TO BE PROTECTED, they're grown ass IMMORTAL ADULTS with huge responsibilities, they rule kingdoms, they hold a huge power in their hands, they're imperfect and not innocent. They can stand for themselves, they can fight, they can destroy, they can lie and they WILL if they need to.

I can SMELL that a shit tonne of people in this fandom secretly enjoys beast x ancient as a guilty pleasure, a forbidden fruit, but they will never admit it just because they're afraid of being harassed and bullied and it's just sad how normalized it is to hurt actual people over shipping some mobile game characters, who are adults, doesn't have power imbalance between them and aren't related.

And allat coming from ME, who doesn't ship a single beast x ancient ship

It's sad lol. Sad for the Beast x Ancient community and honestly kind of pathetic for ardent detractors at this point. I've seen sooooo many Beast x Ancient fans get harassed and even sent death threats, it's not even funny (not that it ever was in the first place). Don't you have better things to do than get this mad about video games lol. Like a job or school or a hobby or something

You're right, the Ancients are not helpless widdle babies and I'm kind of sick of how often they're infantilized, in general and just for the sake of tearing down BxA. They're grown adults who are thousands of years old. Two of them are parents, whose children are grown adults themselves. 4 of 5 founded entire nations. 1 is an active ruler still (Cacao), one seeks to rule again (Golden). Let's not kid ourselves, they've probably all got blood on their hands (not to the degree the Beasts do, but still. You don't live that life without having to make tough choices). Stop treating them like porcelain dolls lol. Yes, the Beasts attacked them, but they're villains. That's what villains do. Go play Animal Crossing if you can't handle heroes and villains fighting each other lol

And then I get a laugh whenever those same people who screech about toxicity and abuse and yadda yadda turn around and ship H*llyt*ya or Sh*dowSp*ce. The former is BxA in a different costume. The latter... Man. You know. Because TWO deranged maniacs, who are fundamentally incompatible in every way and do not make sense at all and absolutely would hurt each other and bring each other down I hate that ship so damn much. Do not ask me abt it I WILL ramble and nobody needs that. Zero beef with fans though, we're coolio! Just a difference of opinion!, is such a better option, isn't it lol. Hypocrisy.

I'm sure you noticed that ep 7 + 8 brought out a whole lot of new ShadowVanilla fans. I agree w/ you, I can feel that there are a fuckton of BxA fans lurking in the darkness, waiting for an excuse to poke their heads out (like 7 + 8 lol), only hiding because they don't want to attract lunatics. Even YOU sent this ask anonymously. Most of my inbox is stuff from anons, and I look at them all and wonder, "how many of you are just afraid of backlash for expressing any joy in BurningCheese or any of the other BxA pairs?" It's ok, guys. Don't listen to them. Be you. I'm being me right now, as cringy as I am. I am Extremely Normal about BurningCheese and I'm not ashamed :) they're video game characters at the end of the day, just have fun. Why can't we all just be bros, man, what does any of this matter

[i-am-snowils-admiral]

So the dpxdc fandom has been trying to come up with more ways to get Danny into Gotham without relying on the old Bat-adoption trope (though it's a fun trope that I love), which typically either means aging him up or giving him a fake id and making him live alone in Gotham pretending to be aged up, but personally I think we can streamline the process a bit by borrowing liberally from Marsalias' fic Adoption (if you haven't read it, definitely do, it's a really good fic) and sticking Actual Master of Time Clockwork in Gotham as yet another weird rich cryptid.

For those who haven't read that fic, the basic premise is that Clockwork decides to adopt Danny completely legally through both ghost and human methods. He is required to establish a human persona for this, which I find hysterical. He and Danny end up living in an incredibly creepy manor that they both love. We can easily uproot that thing and plop it into Gotham. If we want to be particularly funny about it, we can sandwich Wayne Manor between Clockwork and the Drakes to make them all neighbors.

Now what you do from there is obviously subject to whatever story you're wanting to tell, but there's a couple fun things I want to suggest:

Clockwork doesn't try very hard on his human persona. He still dresses like a time god in a fantasy novel (I'm a little in love with 13thcat's designs so I like to imagine his human form looks a little like this). You have to live, what, 40-50 years in a city to be established? Sure. Why bother aging visibly in this time? That's not necessary! What does he do for work? Uhhhh he's a woodworker who makes clocks. That's why he has millions or even billions of dollars, obviously.

5-year-old Bruce Wayne is OBSESSED with Clockwork (aka Charles Worth). This is baby's first incredibly pure crush. This is your really cool kindergarten teacher that you remain a little in love with well into adulthood, except instead of being nice CW is just really weird and doesn't care about what 5-year-olds are able to discuss. Baby Bruce does that little kid "I'll marry you when I grow up" thing that everyone finds adorable but CW says "there are many timelines where you get married, though never to me. Some options are better than others, but I won't tell you about them" because what else would he say.

When Danny shows up in Gotham decades later as CW's adopted kid Bruce is zeroed in on all the gossip. His interest is based entirely on his childhood obsession though so he uses absolutely zero Batman skills to investigate the situation and therefore finds nothing weird about Danny's background. The batkids find this hilarious because there is Clearly something weird going on with that kid.

Clockwork could easily solve all of the Bats' problems and tell them the answers to all the investigations they're doing but why would he do that???? That's boring. He's vibing in his new house with his cool liminal son why would he be worried about *checks notes* the hundreds of people dying to rogue attacks nearby.

Despite never being genuinely helpful he DOES randomly drop in-universe lore that no one would've figured out otherwise. Usually he does this about six months after it would've been really nice to know.

He doesn't do this out of malice he just doesn't intervene in things normally and if he does, it's only by request. The Bats (besides Batman because he's still oblivious) are too worried about what he might ask for in exchange to make requests though they know he's powerful but they are totally wrong because he's just sitting there baking bread thinking "hm I wonder why Timothy never asked me to help him get Batman back from being lost in the time stream, I could've done that really easily without changing too much. Oh well, whatever makes him happy."

Danny also never makes requests but that's because CW went a bit too hard on teaching him messed up karmic lessons about interfering with time so Danny just assumes it's always a bad idea to ask.

[veryintricaterituals]

We need to talk about queer representation in What We Do In The Shadows

I'm just going to say it: for a show that claims to have great queer representation I sure haven't seen a gay couple in five seasons.

(The closest they've come is with Freddy and we all saw how that turned out)

Okay, I've been thinking about this for a while and I honestly don't love the discourse but fuck it. We need to talk about queer love and queer representation on wwdits and how it's not great.

Let me begin by saying that I love this show, I do, it's my favorite and I adore it and I am not going to stop watching it. But the internet holding it it as the be all, end all of queer representation needs to stop. We need to take off our heartshapped glasses for a second and think critically.

Now I'm not saying it's homophobic because it's clearly not, but a beacon of queer representation and love it is not.

Yes, it has its moments and when they come they are incredible (Guillermo's coming out episode my beloved). But if we stop and think about it for a second it becomes clear that same sex love in the show it's not treated with the same respect that straight love gets. And it's time to aknowledge that as a fandom.

It's 2023 and we don't need to be living off scraps or jokes made at our expense anymore. The times of Supernatural or Sherlock are done. But in wwdits we are, a lot of the time, the butt of the joke and not always in a good way. I'm begging you to think for a second about why the jokes are supposed to be funny, think of Laszlo and Nandor, or Laszlo and the Baron, or Nandor's guy wives... the joke IS that it's gay, there's nothing else.

And you know what? That could be FINE or it would be if they commited and treated gay love with a little bit of respect but they don't, not really. Show me queer love, stop just talking about it and SHOW it.

Or at the very least when you do show some semblance of it (looking at the season five finale, season three finale and a lot of other moments) don't immediately undermine it with articles about the power of friendship, it's the least you can do. We are just asking to be more than a joke.

It's like a reverse of what happened in Supernatural where after so many homophobic jokes it just turned kind of gay, it feels like after so many gay jokes with zero commitment behind them wwdits is starting to feel kind of hurtful.

I'm not saying they should have Nandor and Guillermo get together (though they should), I'm saying that after five seasons we should at the very least have seen a couple of the same sex treated with the same respect and love they've shown Laszlo and Nadja, Sean and Charmaine, or hell even Colin and Evie.

All I'm asking is for the show to make us more than just a joke or they're just going to end up circlying around and not looking great, and after five seasons it's starting to happen and I'm worried it's going to leave me with a bitter taste in my mouth by the end.

[c0la-queen]

Hellooo! I just found your page and saw that you write eddsworld stuff! (It’s hard to find fics like yours) and I was reading some of it and I just had a request I wanted to ask (if you don’t mind :D) okay so imagine tords father being actually affectionate with his wife (in private of course) but not just like kisses and stuff he’s LITERALLY all over his wife and is literally not afraid to drag her into the bedroom and tries to tell tord to be like that with his future wife! Btw I love all your fics I’m still reading them now lol

Okay this is a little funny to me because I'm just imagining my version of Tord except he has zero to minimal amounts of daddy issues compared to what he has in my usual timeline. So for this ask, we're delving into Tord: Healthy Family Edition. (Also I am so sorry for being dead. I'm a freshman going to college for the first time and have been adapting to everything!! You guys' support and patience means everything to me!)

--

So we're running off the scenario I gave in my Red Leader dating headcanons. If you haven't read that, see my General Dating Headcanons post.

If you're not interesting in reading that, which I totally understand, here's a brief summary of how Red Leader and Reader met:

Reader starts out as Red Leader's personal secretary. He's notorious for having such a horrible temper that he runs through secretaries like Sarah Boone ran through lawyers (true crime joke, sorry). However, Reader handled his temper and returned it to him tenfold, earning his respect and eventually his love.

Now, in this world, Tord actually had a healthy family life. As the ask said, his father was very openly affectionate and in love with Tord's mother when in private. With Tord and his younger sister, it was what you'd see from parents in media that were happy and in love. Open PDA, frequent dates, and compliments galore. Tord's father, as the Red Leader, would shower Tord's mother in gifts - the finest jewelry in whichever metal she preferred, luxury chocolates, trips to different countries, etc. But it wasn't always money. He spoiled her in other ways, too. Filling the house with vases of her favorite flowers. Giving her massages in the privacy of their bedroom if she was sore. Doing everything in the house on days when she's especially tired. When his mother was pregnant with Tord's younger sister, his father's already heavy spoiling was increased tenfold. Tord was old enough to perceive the world at that point, so his father made sure to hammer into his brain that when his future wife is pregnant, he needs to treat her like a goddess incarnate. Tord took that to heart.

When Tord got older - about his teenage years, maybe around when his father had "the talk" with him (he had no idea Tord didn't need "the talk" and that he had been exposed to copious amounts of hentai when he was 15) - his father started to teach Tord how he expected him to treat his future wife all the time. Of course, Tord had grown up seeing how his father lavished on his mother. But there were some parts that he didn't quite understand as a child that his father clarified. Like his mother's periods! His father taught Tord that while all periods were experienced differently, there were a few different things that generally all period-havers enjoyed. I recently saw a TikTok where a woman said "however much you're spoiling your girlfriend during her period, I want you to triple it." This is something that Tord's father would say to him.

As for bedroom happenings, Tord's parents would do what good parents should do and make sure that the kids are never exposed to that part of their lives. When they're old enough to know what sex even is, Tord wants NOTHING to do with even thinking about his parents having sex. It sends shivers down his spine. For your pleasure as the dear readers on the other side of the screen, I will just say - Tord definitely got his father's genetics <3. Tord's mother was a very content woman.

Back to present day Red Leader (Tord, not his father), there are two stages to his relationship with Reader. The first stage is when they're still dating. Well,, dating in Reader's eyes. As I said in the general headcanons, Red Leader sees dating Reader as an unneeded formality. But Reader, being sensible, still wanted to take it slow instead of jumping straight into marriage. She would continue to work as his personal secretary - its his fucking army, whose going to stop him? The HR department isn't going to say anything since they're both consenting adults and any soldier who is stupid enough to try to accuse Reader of being a gold-digger is going to be cleaning every bathroom on base for a month.

Where it differs in this timeline is that Red Leader wouldn't try to keep a professional air around you in public. He'll come up behind you and wrap his arms around your torso, resting his chin on your shoulder. It doesn't matter if you're talking to another soldier about some paperwork or some other red tape nonsense. If the soldier you're talking to has any objections, they're quickly silenced by Red Leader's piercing stare. They're not risking putting their ass on the line. If you berate him for it afterwards, Red Leader will just pout and whine like a petulant child. He was getting bored doing paperwork and just wanted to hold you, how is that a problem :( He's so protective of you and is even more open about it now. He'll give you at least one body guard if you're going somewhere without him. Makes sure that you're exempt from normal soldier duties because HIS darling should only be tending to him and that's it. He openly shows so much favoritism toward you that even if you two were trying to keep your relationship a secret, every soldier was able to see it within like a week.

Once you two are married, you don't have the option of still getting to be a soldier. Red Leader will let you have whatever hobby you want - no matter how strange, niche, or complex it is, he'll fund it just to make you happy - but you're not going to be doing ANY kind of work if he has anything to say about it. Even if you just end up sleeping through most of the day, he's perfectly content to let you nap the day away all safe and cuddled up in his luxury satin bedsheets. Shows so much PDA all the time. Doesn't matter where you are or who is there. If you're in the base and some soldiers come into Red's office for something, he'll talk to them with a straight face while you lounge on his lap doing something or other. Discussion over drinks with an ally world leader of his? He'll still have you pulled flush to his side with his arm around your waist. Out in public with cameras on you? You bet your ass he'll still pull you in for a sweet, chaste kiss or press his lips to your temple as a silent reminder that he loves you.

Took all his father's advice to heart. You are the most spoiled person on the entire planet, you think. Cleopatra would be so envious with the way that you had Red Leader falling to his knees at your feet just to make you happy. Anything you want, anything at all, he'll get it for you. There has been multiple times where you were craving something specific from a certain country and Red Leader made it his mission to fly out to that country just to get you your craving. All the same kinds of presents that he watched his father shower on his mother - he would get for you, too. Jewelry in your favorite gemstones or ones that matched your eyes. Diamonds in every form, shape, and size. Clothing made of the finest imported materials. Desserts from around the world that were made for queens. Hundreds of dollars of perfumes in your favorite scents. Anything and everything just for you.

Takes your periods very seriously. He somehow knows your cycle better than you do. Tracks it like his life depends on it. He knows that your period is coming days before you're even aware that its time. The morning it starts, he's already got everything on hand. Whatever things work best for your period. A heating pad or ice packs, a bottle of Midol, and every snack and drink that you crave. He'll have the base kitchens make bulk desserts just to have on hand for you. Ice cream is already in the freezer. You're aching or bloated? The bath is already full and has your favorite bath oils added. That metal arm does wonders to massage your aching muscles. If you need something weighted for your cramps, what better than a buff soldier to lie on top of you! (If you need any kind of release, Red Leader isn't afraid of a little blood ;3)

If you ever get pregnant? Forget ever getting up for any reason other than daily exercise that's healthy for you and the baby. Even then, you're only allowed to walk around you and Red Leader's living quarters or out in the grassy training grounds with Red Leader by your side the entire time. Other than that, you are confined to bed or couch rest at all times. You are literally growing his child every hour of the day for the next nine months. Red Leader doesn't want you even thinking of doing anything other than resting and being the amazing person that you are. He'll do everything that the base doctors said would be good for you and the baby. He makes vitamin and herbal drinks for you, gets you every craving, and makes sure you're at top health. He deals with your shifting hormones without ever making a fuss. The affection is cranked to maximum - with the gift-giving having the added bonus of baby oriented items. He was never happier than when he sat on the floor of the nursery, putting together your new IKEA crib while you researched nursery themes on Pinterest in the plush chair against the wall. Not to mention, he increased base security more than ever during those nine months. He didn't want any of his enemies even sneezing within 1,000 miles of the base without him knowing about it. Not when the love of his life was more vulnerable and fragile than ever.

Tord's father in this timeline would be proud of the man he raised. Women are a gift to this world and deserve to be treated as such. Reader is Tord's entire world and he wants her to feel like it.

[brucewaynehater101]

Just read the Power-Cancelling Bruce ask and aaaaaah. That idea is just so perfect.

All of the heroes think that Batman is being snobby and looking down on them when actually he's just trying to keep them safe. If people like Luthor or Waller found out that there's someone they can use to completely shut down metas they would do anything to get their hands on him. In this idea Bruce can't control his power it's something automatic like Superman's invulnerability, so he knows he's a liability to all others if captured. Furthermore, his powers are only effective against other metas, he has no particular advantage against regular human bad guys looking to use him for their plans (aside from you know, being Batman). He knows he's not easy to subdue, but he can't risk it.

This continues until the Titans are fighting against this meta supervillain and they're completely outclassed. Maybe something like Amazon where their meta ability consists in copying other super powers in a radius. The leaguers have to stay away for fear of making things significantly worse for the kids, until they see this black plane flying by. By the time they make it to ground zero of the attack, Batman is already gone but the villain is subdued and the Titans can't stop talking about how cool Dick's dad is.

On another note I think Bruce would be a lot closer with Oliver, Helena and any non-powered vigilante. I don't know whether he'd tell them or not (what do you think?) but just imagine the comedy of Green Arrow talking about his pal Bats, and how he's really such a sweet guy while the other's go "HE'S REAL?!?!/NICE!?!".

Another comedy potential is the sitcom logistics of his children's dating life. Especially if they don't know either. Dick thinks his dad is racist against aliens because he had no problem with him dating Babs but won't allow him to bring Kori to Gotham. They know he can't be homophobic because he had no problem with Jayson and Roy but he won't let Kon or Jon set foot in the city either ("See? He's racist, I told you all").

Also, Bruce developing some sort of parasocial relationship with the Justice League from spying on them (giving little mermaid vibes). Maybe he has to send Duke with one of them after he does his basic bat-training once he realizes he's a meta. Sorry, I just had so many thoughts and I wanted to share!

My questions are, who does he tell and when? How do the kids feel when they get to interact with metas for the first time? On the line of sending Duke away part time so he can reach his full potential, would he even know one of his kids was a meta? Is his power radius the entire city or has he found a way to amplify his power specifically in Gotham? Feel free to add any other thoughts, love your ideas!

Hello! The post being referenced is here ^^

I very much so vibe with Bruce having a close relationship with non-powered vigilantes/heroes and being practically a myth to powered ones. This is especially funny if you think of Green Arrow and Black Canary.

Also, this could become a cute Clark/Bruce fic where Superman is trying his hardest to become friends with Batman (the dad of Kon and Jon's friends!) while Batman is trying his hardest to run away from him.

Part of me thinks that Bruce would want the JL to have practice not having access to their powers during training. So, I'm debating how long he would keep his power from that purpose 🤔

Then there's the idea of who knows. The funny answer would be no one but Alfred. Not sure, though, particularly if we question how the power works. Does someone under its influence immediately know or do they only know when they try to use their powers?

Is Bruce aware when it affects someone? Since it is always on, perhaps he doesn't notice? I really am curious about the specifics of this power :/

As far as radius of power... While all of Gotham would be hella cool, a few of Batman's Rogues have some sort of power. They would have to move to another city if they could never utilize their power. Also, Duke would have to move too :(

So, I'm thinking the radius is naturally ~10 feet, but he can purposefully push it up to four miles? Does that seem like a fair estimate?

And I appreciate the ask! I love exploring ideas ^^

[11queensupreme11]

So all the Cú talk reminds of the fact of in ireland irish (Gaelige) is a mandatory subject. Like you there's no way of getting out of it UNLESS you have something like dyslexia, ADHD or something of the sorts

Just cos the language is super old (pretty sure it's one of the oldest actually but I'm not sure) and really difficult to learn , cos ot follows it's own rules

So I just had the mental image of Cú bullying Percy by speaking in irish and since she has both dyslexia and adhd, will absolutely not be able to make heads or tails of what is going on and has zero chance of understanding it

Also I noticed how you said Anubis hates the English and I honestly feel like Cú would too.

I'm not gonna get into Irish history, cos it's long but as an example of how badly we were treated. During the times were Africans were slaves IF they had Irish blood in them they were immediately cheaper or even free because they're seen as tainted with barbarian blood, cos we were also bot consider white too lol

But ye , considering the English made us speaking our native language, celebrating our culture and also lead to a MASSIVE population decrease (8m to 4m) I feel like he'd hate them. I'm saying this cos I can imagine them bonding over how to traumatise the Brits

ALSO I AM NOT ASKING YOU TO SUDDENLY HAVE CÚ SPEAKING IRISH TOO PERCY. like unless it's a nickname or something or maybe curses I feel like that's pointless and kinda ooc, so obviously I'm not telling you to make Cú's whole personality be irish lol

I just thought of it in irish class yesterday and thought it was funny

Anyway love ya x

THIS WHOLE THING JUST REMINDED ME OF MY ISSUES WITH CÚ CHULAINN'S AGE (tho either way, he'd still hate the english LMAO, but my question is whether he was actually alive to witness the shit england was putting ireland through)

the thing about the ulster cycle is that it's not very... cohesively written?? idk if that's the right word for it, but basically it's not written by the same author, but many authors over generations. so a lot of the dates and real-life historical events being talked about in there contradict each other

some sources deducted that he was born in 200 BCE, but king fachtna, cú chulainn's grandpa, dies in 94 BCE.

then another deduced that he was born between 13-28 BCE

then another at around 1 CE

etc. etc. 😅😅😅 however, most of the answers do seem to agree it was at least in first century BCE and not CE, which makes him 2000+ years old.

i think back then ireland and britain (not yet england at the time) interacted, but idk much about conflicts so that's why i was wondering if cú chulainn was around to personally witness/experience it before going to valhalla

but yeah, regardless, he'd absolutely HATE THEM. cuz even if there was nothing really going while he was alive, he definitely experienced some shit while he was traveling around valhalla's many irelands as the years went and learned what the english have been doing and how they continued to shit on the irish even after death 💀 probably killed many of them cuz they pissed him off so bad too 💀

ALSO I'M PLANNING ON HAVING HIM SPEAK IRISH TO PERCY, BUT LIKE... PET NAMES LOL. but actually very cute and loving ones solely because he knows she won't understand it, meanwhile he calls her insults in english 😂😂

cú chulainn speaking to percy in english: 👹🖕

cú chulainn speaking to percy in irish: 💖🫶

[whoslaurapalmer]

twin peaks but it happens in 2010. laura palmer have iphone etc etc

this ask has been haunting me since i saw it last night oh my god okay okay so

i wanted to lead with laura being an influencer but no one was quite influencing in 2010 yet. but the point here being that i think she posts a lot online and cultivates her online image very carefully (very soft, carefree, excited teenager) and has a LOT of followers on everything and always gets a ton of likes. bc it's laura, she's so beautiful and special and popular, of course everyone is following her, of course everyone is liking all her posts to get a piece of her

she has a twitter (laurapalmer93) where she posts a lot of pictures with little captions like.......'morning donuts at the diner!!' with a picture of the donuts and a milkshake or a Coffee To Be An Adult, 'can you believe this guy? <3' with a picture of bobby making a face (or even.........dare i say it...........doing the dougie), a picture of donna and james with '<33333333' (modern emojis were just getting really big then but i myself was not a big emoji user in 2010 yet, so neither is laura), 'don't tell ;)' with a picture of her holding a cigarette (of course everyone still smokes in the high school bathrooms).

one time she gets away with posting the lyrics to if i die young by the band perry (IF I DIE YOUNG! BURY ME IN SATIN! LAY ME DOWN ON A BED OF ROSES!) (FUNNY WHEN YOU'RE DEAD HOW PEOPLE START LISTENING!) bc it's a popular song. it raises a few eyebrows but it's a song and it's laura. how seriously do you take teen angst, even among your friends? that's just what laura does. what's there to really worry about, huh? (the song was released in may 2010 but let's say the lead up to her death is in 2010)

on facebook she posts a lot of volunteer stuff. school dance photos, which she helps organize. buy some cookies to support the french club!! she's very involved with student council, and she organizes the group halloween costume. her facebook is filled with photos of her with other people, but not really any of just her. she doesn't post a lot of statuses, but they're usually about homework or tests or 'feels like summer!' towards the end of the school year. she's friends with her parents. she definitely takes ap classes.

she has a private vent twitter (lostinthewoods) with zero followers that she uses as a diary bc she thinks it'll be safer than having it physically written down. her childhood lisa frank diary with the tiny lock and glitter gel pens that she kept in her bed post went missing, after all. her vent twitter is filled with sooooooo many tweets bc this was still the 160 character limit days and she would just post and post and post especially late at night. (she definitely has string lights in her room.) she is a MASTER of using her phone with no one seeing -- she has the layout absolutely memorized. she was only caught texting in class once and of course the teacher let it go.

bob/leland finds her passwords and breaks into the vent twitter and leaves her horrifying tweets she sees later, instead of the back and forth they have in the diary and leland ripping the pages out.

i think she has a third twitter, for sex, but i'm not sure if that tracks for the time period? (snapchat wasn't a thing until fall 2011.) or like a forum sort of thing? i think it's still super easy for laura to sneak out, even in an increased security camera world. there's still a lot of stress on the, yknow, ~secret unexposed underbelly of the world especially in a time of more eyes on everything~ in the 2010s.

meanwhile, james posts music a lot on facebook, and also acoustic covers of songs. like. yknow. HEY SOUL SISTER. donna loves the original pusheen stickers. they record the picnic video on her flip video camera. mike loves icanhascheezburger, and he jailbreaks his phone. audrey gets really into audrey hepburn quote posting, Aesthetic France, black and white photos, berets, has a photography phase and carries and actual camera bc it's Vintage. she's an early tumblr user. no one else in school has a tumblr yet, so she feels very cool but also very lonely about it.

harry has very little understanding of social media, however cooper is very into all social media, he finds it delightful. he enjoys a good cat video. he looks through all of laura's photos, her tweets, facebook videos, and i think there's, honestly even more of a feeling of tragedy bc of how much more physical evidence there is available of laura's life, lingering fingerprints, last tweets, last posts, passwords to put in and information to see, cold blue computer light, the even worse voyeurism in people expecting so much of your life to be online, in watching it play out online, in the image laura created for herself online to be the person people expected

donna rereads laura's twitter in the dead of night, just over and over again. goes back through their texts. so much of grief has become so much more public with social media and using it as a teenager, and there's this back and forth in donna of not posting anything and then posting the most miserable statuses about losing her best friend.

i know i should get deeper into the investigation but i keep thinking instead of how laura definitely gets a 20/20 special. it's probably definitely called 'the secret life of the american teenager.' (bc there was that show on at the time with the same name) elizabeth vargas visits twin peaks, is appropriately grim, there's a lot of b roll of the town and the woods but without the grace of twin peaks' cinematography. they play up the creation of a narrative big, as they always do on 20/20. the revelation of her 'double life' is at the halfway mark and simultaneously not discussed enough and overestimated. 'laura palmer was your average, everyday teenager -- she liked horses. cats. she got good grades, was homecoming queen, had a boyfriend on the football team. she volunteered on weekends. she had her whole life ahead of her. or was there more to the story than anyone knew? was there a dark side to the all-american girl?' oh, it's agonizing. the trailers play up a lot of potential spooky woods stuff that isn't followed through on in the actual episode.

now 20/20 prides itself on getting the story right, so i feel like it's.........i feel like they have to say it's leland at the end (and they definitely never get into anything about bob). but i also think, for some reason, it could easily have a 'we never found the killer' ending. especially re: s3........the thing is, i feel like laura's death particularly is the kind of thing that shows up on 20/20, but the rest of the circumstances would've ended up on like the unsolved mysteries website (the last revival ended in 2010, before the netflix reboot in 2019) (especially with WELL OUR FBI AGENT WENT MISSING). and there's so much online to put together in a website about it, there's so much for people online to dig into who have never even been to twin peaks, to think they know a town and the people in it and the girl who died even if it's just literally THE MOST DISGUSTING VOYEURISM IN THE WHOLE WORLD i just think there's such a. horror in that. people have the most, just, enraging takes when they get involved in a Murder That Happened Somewhere Else. people thinking they alone can figure out a mystery they've never seen, they can of course see something no one else has. and it's different than the people in the town ignoring it -- i think a lot of the secrets in twin peaks stay the same, no matter the time period, so of course it's still, a terrible dying town killing the people in it, maybe even quieter than it is in the original, some new infrastructure but old buildings, not all of them occupied anymore, ANYWAY -- like of course yes people in the town ignore the same amount they did in the original, all small towns bury things. but just bc the town itself isn't paying attention doesn't mean that some rando online is going to know more, no matter how much they think they will. there's like an entitlement to details of a murder, an I Must Be The Hero, The Savior, bc i'm on a fucking reddit thread about it

now i have zero (0) idea of how medical science and forensics work, but i have to assume there have been some advancements in the field between 1989/1990 and 2010/2011. the town still rushes the funeral, but would albert have been able to find anything else sooner? what is it he would have found to point to leland sooner? oh........dna testing, maybe? would he be able to find out about leland right away? there's more of a sense of urgency, maybe less of a slowness between events, even more of a shattering horror. maybe leland goes missing in an attempt to cover things up. hmmmmmm.

final note -- cooper gets called mulder as a nickname bc the x files happened as a show in this universe.

[gl1tchr]

It would be quite lovely. If perhaps you elaborated on connecting the dots between Dano and Arkhamverse sksjd-

(IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY. I AM SO. SORRY I CAN LEAVE YOUR INBOX ALONE AAA)

NEVER leave my inbox alone. Harass my inbox. Follow it home. Look through its windows.

ANYWAYS HJGDKSG this is actually my Long Standing Belief That Arkhamverse Riddler Played An Extremely Big Role In The Writing of Dano Riddler here's some Literature but I'll talk More right now

SO we've all seen the Early Concepts for the Riddler figures and even some of the promo material - his logo's a little funny, ain't it?

It's like they had an initial design and scrapped it for the one that looks slightly less like traditional crosshairs. Now I'm SURE this variation of Eddie's question marks has been used before, but I found it hard to find any results for this particular variation of his symbol outside of these version of Dano Riddler merch. EXCEPT. on the walls in Arkham Knight, as part of Eddie's wall scribbles

(do forgive the image being so. itty <//3)

NOW we do Know based on the wiki that he was ALSO inspired by Zero Year. THOUGH I have Yet Another Long Standing Opinion that Zero Year and Arkham Knight are two sides of the same coin. They are the same flavors of Riddler in different clothes, and walking in slightly different directions. And I think Dano is the babychild mixture of the two, taking on the grit and anger and fury of Arkham Knight and the cunning and even playfulness of Zero Year.

PUSHING ONTO POINT TWO, Arkham Knight and 2022 both attempt, at first, to maybe not be - *as* villainous. AK is first Enigma in Arkham Origins, working FOR the GCPD's cybercrimes unit and aiming to expose Gotham's most corrupt individuals. Though, he was fully aware such an aggressive, dangerous move would likely result in mass chaos, but he didn't care. The point was getting the TRUTH out. So, a man named Edward Nashton (Arkhamverse DOES also start as a Nashton. That's not an especially common choice, it's very deliberate for Eddie writers to start with Nashton and move into Nigma later) works for a legitimate organization, uncovers corruption, and does everything in his power to expose it, regardless of who he may hurt in the process? Deja vu.

now all of this is to say, Edwards is the same ghsdkg Edwards are GOING to have similar stories because. They're comic book characters, they have archetypes and standards for how they're portrayed, but writers do enjoy playing with Eddie's story a bit, so for there to be a conscious effort to mirror AK And Zero Year so hard compared to OTHER Riddler backstories, I'm convinced AK is in there a lot more than he's given credit for

[akaikali]

TMAGP EP 31 REACTION (SPOILERS)

OH. OKAY. SO WE'RE PICKING UP IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE SEASON 1 FINALE. OKAY THEN.

so its just colin's hand??? not his entire body??? i mean, clearly he's become part of the system, right? like im assuming he TURNED into a system, like wires for blood kind of situation???

gwen you absolutely infuriating woman please get fucked (literally) i think it would really do you some wonders. find someone to dom you please im asking nicely it would do you So Much Good

OH. HAND'S GONE. GREAT. COLIN GOT EATEN BY THE COMPUTER AND NOW THE ONLY PROOF THEY HAD OF THAT IS GONE. LOVELY.

OH. OKAY. OKAY WOW. SO. firstly, jmj=null??? its not .jmj error rn??? and also "extension BECHER" so yes colin is become part of the system. and im assume the computer recording we're hearing is from...inside of him or something.

CROWBAR. YOU'RE JOKING. THIS HAS TO BE ON PURPOSE. BRUTAL PIPE URDER VS BRUTAL CROWBAR MURDER. EXCEPT THE CROWBAR WAS KIND OF SELF MURDER.

oh. oh thats. thats fucked. this is so sergey ushanka coded. tessa winters how i miss you my autistic girl with a tech special interest <3

hmmm okay thats strange. "self.host errors resolved" but ".jmj error not resolved"? but also now its like. if what happened to colin happened to jmj and THATS why they're in the system...my poor babies. except for jonah. jonah fucking deserved that.

new administrator permissions assigned?? TO WHO???? COLIN HAD ADMIN PERMISSIONS BEFORE, WHO HAS THEM NOW???? I THINK WHOEVER IT IS PROBABLY HAS FREDDY'S TARGET ON THEM.

"it sounds like the system was...provoked" SHUT UP GWEN YOU ARE SO FRUSTRATING YOU ARE JUST LIKE UR PREDECESSOR (our dear jarchavist)

"no, no, i'm sure we can leave!...Um. Freddie. Can we leave?" gwen i fucking love you, you stupid fucking dumbass <3

so like i also wanna know what alice knows about lena because CLEARLY, she knows that lena would know how to deal with this. also slightly concerned that lena might be dead seeing as she had uh. no exit interview. the government might have just nerfed her.

gwen acting all tough and like she's in charge but immediately running after alice and going "wait, wait for me!" because she's scared of being alone with the murder computer is SO funny

HELLO????? SAM???? MY BOY MY POOR DEAR BOY ARE YOU GOOD?????? listen i know we have mixed opinions on sam but like. come on. the man still fought off the archivist to protect celia when it came after her.

repeated by something. why is that underlined in the transcript. are there...are there like tape recorder creatures. is that whats happening here.

celia. celia honey no. i know you've got a kid and everythin but like sam is NOT okay. my girl, you sacrificed him and used him. and on top of all of that, you've lied to alice about all of this. this is going to end so badly.

"i...recognized it from a case" celia honey i know you can lie better than that. come on. you know alice does NOT believe that.

OH. THATS NOT FUN. THE PHOTOCOPIER PRINTING COLIN'S FACE EVEN WHEN UNPLUGGED. YEAH THAT IS VERY VERY SERGEY UNSHANKA. LOVING THAT. but also honestly valid coping mechanism alice you gotta make the dark jokes or you will break down.

IM SORRY YOU HAVE TO WHISTLE SOMETHING HAPPY TO MAKE THE ECHO MONSTERS LEAVE??? AND SAM CHOOSES FUCKING CIRCUS MUSIC??? "Not circus music, you cretin!" PLEASE IM DYING THIS IS SO FUNNY okay greensleeves is somewhat better.

OH MY GOD ITS GEORGIE ITS WIFE SHE'S BACK I MISSED YOU MY GIRLLLL she's always here for celia i love her. i think she knows whats going on. vaguely.

"But I just want you to know I think things are looking up. All going well, this should be the last zero-notice call out" "We'll see" GEORGIE WHAT DO YOU KNOWWWWW

"i want a solicitor" oh honey :((( even after being dragged into another dimension he first asks for a lawyer. i don't know if that was intentional but with him clearly being a brown man :((((

GEORGIE???? SHE'S. WHAT. CAPTAIN OF THE WARDENS???? "lacks the military mannor one might expect" IS THIS OUR TMA GEORGIE???? WHAT??????????????

"you got a ride in Gertrude" A RIDE IN WHAT NOW???? ARE YOU TELLING ME THEY NAMED A FUCKING TANK OR SOMETHING AFTER GERTRUDE????? okay wait if this is TMA verse then melanie would be around and melanie knows about gerrtrude's explosives so that. checks out actually.

oh celia. celia your web of lies is going to come back to haunt you. i know you cant tell them but at the same time they are going to find out the truth eventually and alice might straight up chuck you into the "tear" herself.

"licensing issues?" alice i love you never change

"How convenient that your only proof is sat in an inbox I can’t read in case it tries to eat me." "It did not 'eat' Colin! The system just… responded to an attack." "By eating Colin." dyhard how i adore you.

OHHHH ARCHIVIST CREATURE FOLLOWED SAM WE KNEW THIS OFC FROM THE TRAILERRRR

okay so. wait. is. was heidi a watcher???? like when the eyepocalypse happened, was she touched by the eye? like she seems like what i would have expected to happen to someone like amy patel.

oh my god we're getting to find out what LONDON was like during the eyepocalypse. whatever the creatures that were hunting down georgie, melanie, and their little cult was. oh my god.

OKAY SO THIS IS DEF TMA-VERSE "Not when the tower fell and the eye closed. Not when the pupil collapsed and the Archivist died, his face still burned into my mind." BUT ALSO FUCK ME NOOOOO IS JARCHAVIST REALLY DEAD NOOO NO NO HE'S SOMEWHERE ELSE I AM IN DENIAL HE'S ELSEWHERE HE AND MARTIN ARE LIVING IN ANOTHER UNIVERSE HAPPY IN THE SCOTTISH HIGHLANDS

oh heidi. bye bye heidi.

WOW WHAT A START TO THE SEASON. WE GOT SO MUCH. I HAVE NEVER SAID "WHAT THE FUCK" THIS MANY TIMES IN A ROW BEFORE. GERTRUDE IS A VEHICLE NOW. WHAT THE FUCK.