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#but you can't say that because you used to hate each other and also your ex and his future queerplatonic partner are there watching
widow-tarot · 3 days
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MINI PAC READING: What Would They Tell You If They Could? (Romance)
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GROUPS: 1 - 2 - 3 4 - 5 - 6
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Instruction: Think about your person while choosing a group. Do not use more than 1 group for one person. Just to remind you, this is only for entertainment purposes.
If you don't feel drawn to any group, then this reading is not for you.
GROUP 1
Cards: Ace of Wands, Knight of Wands rx, Wheel of Fortune rx, I Like You, Girl Talk rx, Pond, Archangel Metatron.
I like you. I know it's straightforward, but I cannot say it in any other way that's more meaningful or more direct. It might not sound meaningful but it is to me (I hope it is to you too). I feel there is a spiritual connection between us and it seems no matter what, we keep coming back to each other. Our connection is like a pond; can be insignificant to others but to us, it holds so much life and secrets but it can easily be destroyed if not cultivated. We are so hot and cold; we like each other, then we hate each other over something trivial (we both don't know what exactly annoyed us). I want to move towards you but things are holding me back. There's so much I want to do and say but I'm standing still. I know we will truly come together someday. No one knows about it because I don't share those feelings with friends. It seems too private and sacred.
SONGS:
Eric by Mitski ("Take off my clothes and watch me move; You can come closer, I'll let you hurt me; But how long, how long can we play this way?; I'm tired, I'm tired of not loving you"
Blue Velvet by Lana Del Rey ("Ours a love I held tightly; Feeling the rapture grow; Like a flame burning brightly; But when she left; Gone was the glow")
Nothing's Gonna Hurt You, Baby by Cigarettes After Sex ("Whispered something in your ear; It was a perverted thing to say; But I said it anyway; Made you smile and look away; Nothing's gonna hurt you, baby; As long as you're with me, you'll be just fine")
GROUP 2
Cards: 9 of Pentacles, 2 of Pentacles, 7 of Cups, Noose rx, Mushrooms, The Snake, Hammer rx, Seraphim Seraphisa rx.
You will forever be in my heart and mind, but we can never be together in the way we want. There are way too many blockages and I do think we are not fit to be in a relationship. I am in a committed relationship (or you are) and I do not wish to leave her for I love her. Maybe I am a coward, but I am a practical and cautious one. I will not take reckless actions just to wake up one day and regret it. I think what we have is a fantasy, pleasant make-believe, daydreaming. However, I don't want you gone because you're an important person to me. I wish you happiness but I can't follow you.
SONGS:
Lonesome Love by Mitski ("I call you, to see you again; So I can win, and this can finally end")
Blue Banisters by Lana Del Rey ("She said, "You can't be a muse and be happy, too; You can't blacken the pages with Russian poetry and be happy"; And that scared me; 'Cause I met a man who said he'd come back every May;Just to help me if I'd paint; Now when weather turns to May; All my sisters come to paint")
Flash by Cigarettes After Sex ("I'm a flash; You were blinded by the love I had; I'm a flash; The light could only get in through the cracks")
GROUP 3
Cards: The Hierophant rx, 8 of Wands, The Devil, 10 of Swords rx, Wildflowers, Mirror, Keys on a Ring, Archangel Raphael.
You are the temptation, the chaos in my life, the wildflowers that can still be growing but can also be already taken by someone else while I wasn't looking. You're untouchable, unable to be caught, translucent. One minute you're here only to leave seconds later just to come back and stay for a long time. You're unpredictable, a sin worth sinning for. But I hate to be alone and you make me sad. I love to see you but I hate myself when you leave. I don't know if you have any feelings for me; is it something serious or is it just casual and convenient? I can't do this anymore, I'm trapped and I feel miserable. I wish I could tell you to stay away, to abandon me, to never come back. It would be easier for me to move on then but I am a fool for you. I wish I was strong enough to talk things through but I'd rather have some of you than none of you. Then again, being with you hurts me so what should I do?
SONGS:
Should've Been Me by Mitski ("Relive all the ways you still want me; I haven't given you what you need; You wanted me but couldn't reach me; I'm sorry it should've been me"
Blue Jeans by Lana Del Rey ("I will love you till the end of time; I would wait a million years; Promise you'll remember that you're mine; Baby, can you see through the tears?; You went out every night; And, baby, that's alright; But when you walked out that door; A piece of me died")
Ambien Slide by Cigarettes After Sex ("Take my love with some pretend; You said you couldn't help it; Had everything that you wanted; When my love was something yours; But now you're feeling helpless")
GROUP 4
Cards: Death, Page of Pentacles rx, The Chariot rx, Archangel Sammael, Eileen Chang rx, Boat rx, Engagement Ring rx.
I don't want to try to fix this thing between us anymore, it's a fool's errand. We tried and it didn't work, it's time to move on to something else because we are just wasting our time and I'm exhausted. Let me go. Let me leave, peacefully. I don't want to fight but I'm frustrated. I think we tried to escape the inevitable but at the end of the road, we cannot pretend any longer. Relieve me of this burden and don't resent me.
SONGS:
Working For The Knife by Mitski ("I always thought the choice was mine; And I was right, but I just chose wrong")
Bel Air by Lana Del Rey ("Gargoyles standing at the front of your gate; Trying to tell me to wait; But I can't wait to see you; So I run, like I'm mad, to heaven's door; I don't wanna be bad; I won't cheat you no more")
Tejano Blue by Cigarettes After Sex ("We wanted to fuck with real love; Wanted it sweet, so pure and warm; And when you say you want it all, I know you want it all; Baby, take it all from me; I always will make it feel like you were the last one; So get in the waves like it was the first time")
GROUP 5
Cards: The Star rx, 7 of Pentacles, 10 of Swords rx, Glove rx, The Phoenix, Paradise rx, Archangel Haniel.
I wish we could start anew, without any bitter history between us that holds us back and clouds our judgment. We cannot fully be together while all these thoughts are troubling us, making us suspicious of each other and insecure. I know we both lost hope for this connection, yet we are still going and proceeding with it in any way we can. We don't want this to be over but we need to find a solution. I want you in my life and I'm willing to put work into it. Are you? Someone needs to make the first step though and it's the most difficult thing to do. We cannot stay still for much longer though. We communicate telepathically but we also have to communicate in real life.
SONGS:
First Love/Late Spring by Mitski ("Please hurry leave me; I can't breathe; Please don't say you love me; One word from you and I would; Jump off of this ledge I'm on; Tell me "don't" so I can crawl back in")
Video Games by Lana Del Rey ("It's you, it's you, it's all for you; Everything I do; I tell you all the time; Heaven is a place on earth with you; Tell me all the things you wanna do; It's better than I ever even knew; They say that the world was built for two; Only worth living if somebody is loving you")
Goodbye Mr Blue by Father John Misty (" But maybe if he'd gone sooner; Could've brought us back together last June; When the last time was our last time; If only then I knew; The last time was our last time; Would've told you that the last time comes too soon")
GROUP 6
Cards: Page of Swords rx, 9 of Cups rx, 4 of Swords, Sappho, Archangel Chamuel, Cupid's Arrow rx, Separation rx.
Do you love me? You say you do why does your love cause so much pain? Why am I in agony instead of being elated and happy? Is this how you show your love? I feel neglected and manipulated. I feel ignored and mocked. Am I your partner or your pet? Do you even care what I want? Do you care what I have to say? You treat me as a child as if I cannot think or decide for myself. Do you think I'm stupid? Do you think so lowly of me? When you're not here, I don't miss you and my mind is at ease. I lost all hope for anything to change. It hurts even more because I love you, but your love is weird and dysfunctional. I feel trapped. I even stopped speaking my mind because it was met with ridicule and anger.
SONGS:
Wife by Mitski ("For if I am not yours, what am I?; I daydream I'd give one a name of my own; For even I am on loan; For even mine is unknown; So let me go towards the morning star; With hope it won't disappear;)
Carmen by Lana Del Rey ("Baby's all dressed up, with nowhere to go; That's the little story of the girl you know; Relyin' on the kindness of strangers; Darlin', darlin', doesn't have a problem; Lyin' to herself, 'cause her liquor's top shelf; It's alarmin', honestly, how charmin' she can be; Foolin' everyone, tellin' 'em she's havin' fun")
Hot by Cigarettes After Sex ("Is it all in my head? 'Cause I keep getting scared; That I'll always be lost forever; But I don't give a shit if I'm too delicate; When you hold me, it's always better")
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rinachains · 19 hours
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wc: 1.2k
contents: sukuna x gn!reader, established relationship, a bit of angst and fluff; modern!au (no curses), sukuna can't say sorry for his life, but both of you kind of suck at communicating lol
a/n: aghhh, this is the first drabble I'm posting on here, so bear with me :)
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You knew from the start that a relationship with Sukuna wouldn't exactly be conventional. Being with someone like him didn't promise an easy, smooth ride, but you knew what you were getting into. And it wasn't like you were someone who was easy to handle either.
Sukuna and you were basically like two peas in a pod- you would snicker and roll your eyes at others, exchange brash comments, crude words spilling from your sly mouths. It made you giddy. He was anything but a prince charming - if anything, he was more of a villain. But ever since you were a child, you felt more drawn to the antagonists, believing them to have a certain charm that captivated you.  
A match made in hell, your friends would jokingly say. The two of you weren’t particularly good people and perhaps that’s why you were so good for each other. After all, they do say that two negatives make a positive.
Your very first interaction consisted of you scowling at him and saying that he was ‘an embarrassing asshole trying to compensate for something he clearly lacks'. On that day - which you remembered more than well - you were in a café with your friend, and as you were on your way out, he bumped into both of you, causing your friend to spill her coffee on herself. Instead of apologizing, he just gave her a dirty look and started walking away before you stopped him and started berating him.
From that moment on, Sukuna was a goner. Of course, at first he was just irritated and annoyed by your audacity, but thoughts of you quickly consumed his mind afterwards, which in turn made him despise you even more. Only he didn't really hate you - the line between hatred and appreciation was thin for Sukuna, blending into a confusion of emotions that made it difficult for him. But Sukuna was not one to shy away from challenges, the longing for intensity was deeply rooted in his body.
Sukuna didn’t have a normal perception of love. To him, love was a nuisance and useless. But he found you interesting. There was an intensity to you that matched his own, that he could relish. You were unafraid to show yourself, indifferent towards the opinion of others, too headstrong for your own good. And you understood him, in a twisted way. And he was able to understand you. Maybe that was what he needed this whole time – an equal. Someone who didn’t hold back and wouldn’t try to make him hold back.
When you finally started going out, which was a silent procedure since you two didn’t use the words ‘dating’ or ‘going out’, there was a surprising harmony between you. Meaningful conversations formed easily, playful quips and taunting inbetween, keeping each other on your toes, and there were moments of silence that you basked in, not feeling the need to fill it with unneccesary words. It was comfortable; like the spring breeze, promising something new, something fresh, but still holding an air of familiarity, bringing in a sense of comfort. Until then, Sukuna had never believed that he would ever experience anything like this. Sometimes he thought you were just a figment of his imagination, a product of the loneliness that had clung to him all his life.
So when Sukuna first saw the tears in your eyes (the same ones he always unconsciously looked for, no matter where you were), standing out so brilliantly against your glassy eyes that he felt like he was going blind, and had to resist the urge to turn his own away from them, he also felt overwhelmed for the first time. It didn't help that those tears were forming because of him, a reaction to his words leaving his mouth. It was a thoughtless remark on his part, said out of a moment of disdain, which wasn't necessarily anything new, but this time it obviously hit something deep inside you, and Sukuna knew he’d screwed up. Badly.
He never thought twice about something he said, especially when it was something harsh, simply disregarding the consequences of his hurtful words. So why did he suddenly have this heavy feeling forming in his chest, making it hard to breathe? This bitter taste in his mouth?
Silence hung over you like a heavy blanket, trapping you both and making it hard to move. What exactly were you waiting for? For him to apologize? Words like ‘sorry’ never rolled smoothly over your tongue, your own pride and discomfort holding you back. So how could you expect that from him? You didn’t truly know what you wanted. Perhaps reassurance? A sign that he didn’t think any less of you now? That he didn’t mean what he said?
Sukuna remained silent, his face unreadable and blank like a sketch where the artist had not drawn a face but only the outline of a head. As he stared at you, your cheeks flushed blotchy and you tried to swallow the embarrassment creeping up your throat, blinking a few times to clear the wetness in your eyes.
You didn't want to be weak in front of him – that’s not who you were. You always prided yourself on not showing weakness in front of others, but at the end of the day, you were only human. What if he left you, now that you got this emotional? What if he decided you were too weak, too big of a nuisance to be with? You destroyed the perception he had of you, you were sure of that. 
After a few seconds (which felt like minutes, even hours) had passed, you cleared your throat, eyes flickering to the the clock hanging on the wall behind him. You were running late for work.
“I have to go now”, you managed to breathe out, voice slightly scratchy from holding down your emotions.
“Right.”
There was no goodbye following your departure. Sukuna was left with an empty feeling in his chest, his hand reaching out to grab at it. He hated it.
By the time you got home around 8pm, exhaustion was present in your bones, your body weak and head foggy. Being away for a few hours helped you calm down and get a clearer head, although the embarrassment still seemed to cling to you. Should you just pretend nothing happened? Ignore him? Be cold towards him? You didn't really want to talk about it, you were too tired from the day, from everything.
But as you hung up your coat, with conflicting thoughts running through your heavy head, a smell you knew only too well reached your nose and caught your attention: it was your favorite food. Sukuna has cooked it for you a few times before; each time he has grumbled about how long it takes to make and that some of the ingredients are crazy expensive - he never said it was too difficult for him though, he can make any dish, in his eyes there is no complicated one.
The special thing was that you never had to tell him out loud that it was your favorite dish, he just guessed it from your reaction every time you ate it. The moment you smelled his cooking and heard the clink of dishes being placed on the table where you shared every meal, you knew immediately - that was his way of apologizing.
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could you write your dating shauna hc please? i love your writing btw ❤️😭
Dating Shauna Shipman Headcanons
YAY A REQUEST FOR MY BBG SHAUNA YIPPEE
Ty anon <3
Implied fem reader, could probs be gender neutral, used she/her pronouns like once
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Pre-dating/how you got together
The two of you started talking/hanging out because you were paired up for a project
At first you thought she hated you because she was always very quiet around you, like barely speaking to you even when you speak to her
Turns out she just had no idea how to make a conversation with you. That is, until she came over to work on a project and saw that you had a few of her favorite books. All of a sudden, she's very talkative. At least Shauna levels of very talkative
She starts hanging around you more, not really saying anything but if she sees you in the library, she'll come sit down next to you
After this happens for like the fifth time in a week, you ask her if she wants to maybe go get a coffee and study together
Shauna looks so shocked for a moment, and you wonder if you've misread the entire situation
Then she does her embarrassed little smile and is all "that sounds nice"
Two days later you're meeting her at a coffee shop and you have like the time of your life, she's so incredibly smart, but also so funny
You two start hanging out at least once a week, and sometimes you'll sit with her and the Yellowjackets at lunch
This goes on for a few months, both of you obviously having feelings for each other but neither of you saying anything
Until one day you think "fuck it" at the end of one of your study sessions, and kiss her when you leave. Just like a quick kiss on the cheek and you're out the door
She calls Jackie that night completely losing her mind, asking what to do
Jackie's all "Shauna she likes you. You idiot. Call her." But Shauna can't bring herself to call you
You're wondering if you fucked up the friendship until she's completely normal the next day at school
Nothing changes for like a week until she gets absolutely wasted at a party that you're both at
She comes to find you and she's so drunk that you're like "okay we're leaving." And you drive her back to her house
When you get there, she asks you to stay the night with her, and who are you to say no when she's this drunk?
You stay the night and she confesses she just didn't know what to do when you kissed her, and she didn't know if it was just friendly/that was how you showed affection
But she "has feelings for you or whatever and she knows they're probably stupid"
You're giggling and she's all pouty until you tell her that "obviously you have a crush on her you idiot"
OKAY now to when y'all are actually together!!
She leaves little notes for you in your bags/locker/ your room. They're mostly things she doesn't want to say out loud or reminders of things she wants to talk about
Loves to trade books with you and annotate them. Sticky notes galore. Some are like actual annotations and some are just "reminded me of you/us :)"
JEALOUS SHAUNA mmm... glaring when you dance with someone else at a party, even if it's literally Jackie or Taissa. She doesn't care, you're supposed to be hers.
Making you wear her flannels out... especially if she isn't going to be there with you (also loves to leave lipstick marks/hickeys)
Gets VERY touchy when she's drunk. Arm around your waist, head on your shoulder. Kissing you any second she can
Less touchy sober, but still likes to be touching you, things like holding hands or just sitting next to each other
When you're alone, though, she will not let you go. She's def a cuddler
Double dates with Jackie and Jeff 😭😭😭 they're hella awkward because half the time it's just Shauna and Jackie talking and you and Jeff sitting in silence. Not your fave date nights
Shauna is a clothes stealer. You have any flannels? They're hers now. Sweaters? Great. You've been dating for like two months when you realize half your wardrobe is gone
In her defense, though, she likes it when you take her clothes, too.
You're constantly hearing shit about Jackie and all the other Yellowjackets. Like "Taissa and Van are hooking up, I think" and "Jackie won't shut the hell up about states" you honestly feel like part of the team
Eventual double dates with Tai and Van that are 10x better than the Jackie/Jeff ones. You actually feel like you can talk
Shauna is constantly giving you new book recommendations and you're like "how do you read so much you're always so busy" and she just shrugs
Modern! Shauna that hates TikTok but whenever you show her a cute couple trend she gives in and does it with you
Modern! Shauna who never responds to texts/dms. Even from you. If you have something you really need to ask her, you have to call
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bumblingbabooshka · 6 months
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Romulans, yes or no? 👉👈
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Romulans...YES!
Urasa:
Urasa was abandoned by his father as part of some double-cross/life lesson about being weak. He met a Klingon boy named Adokthosh and saw that he was weak and cowardly compared to the others around him. Urasa ran away from the care of his Romulan bretheren and the two of them began working together to get to the top of the Klingon empire through lying, cheating, bribing, and stealing. I'm sure that'll all go well for them! I'm also sure there won't be any complicated romantic feelings. Bartovka:
She & Asil (Tuvok's daughter) have a longrunning evil-doer vs gallant hero thing going on. Thankfully Bartovka is usually easily foiled because she loves expositing about her devious plans and also is so full of herself that she makes it kinda easy to defeat her.
She figured out she was trans because of Asil. The two of them get in a lot of …. situations. Together.
She has two kids and a wife that she's trying to avoid at all costs because she's pretty sure they'll try to kill her if they find her. Or worse, she'll have to pay child support.
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cryolyst · 2 months
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~
#they speak!#it's probably just the illness that's making me extra irritable but like.#roommate kept coming up to me this morning going oh did i wake you up? i'm sorry if i did. did i do that or no? i'm really sorry.#and i kept telling him to stop saying sorry because i didn't have the brain power to phrase#'you could've been more considerate of your volume but you also have the right to use the common space so it's whatever'#but he said it to me again before i went to my room just now and it's like. ok. shut up.#if you actually cared that much u would've just been quieter in the first place actually.#anyways. annoyed. there were some annoying customers in the store today but it was whatever.#i feel like my fucks to give had already worn out with all the ppl in my social circle/my parents and the recent ongoings of that#[redacted] was being passive aggressive to me in the group chat and it's like. ok! idk what u want from me.#and i'm grateful for them for coming over and helping me with cleaning last week#and it's those sorts of actions that let me know they care and want good things for me#but like. i haaaate telling them anything because even innocuous non-private things get turned into judgement with them.#also. more and more i can feel how i'm drifting away from h and now with retrospect i can see how we mutually hurt each other :)#i keep coming back to this one period where i really wanted to take them to try dimsum and they kept saying they were too scared to try it#and in their new friend group they regularly go out n get dimsum together. which on the surface is like. why didn't you want to go with /me#i told you i wanted to share what i liked and i would explain what things were and i could do the talking and you still said no#but it's also very much a reflection of how i always rolled over and enabled them. i never challenged them. i was always passive.#i also feel like i'm heavily neglecting e and a recently and i can tell how the physical distance is affecting us and idk. it's weird.#anyways. another post that should've been a journal entry! lol!#when [redacted] helped with cleaning they also buried my journal under my like#300 packets of sesame candies and i can't be bothered to dig it out. also my bandaids are missing now. <3#ik this also sounds passive aggressive but genuinely appreciate the help i just kinda hate how they think hidin everything in boxes is good#'we need to get you some more storage boxes and containers!!' actually i think that will be the opposite of helpful.#i need everything visible and on open surfaces so i can 1) remember they exist for me to use and 2) not have barriers for me to get to them
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forcebookish · 1 year
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feel like i'm being gaslighted by the ofs fandom like where are all these wild think pieces coming from we can't possibly be watching the same ONE EPISODE of the same drama
anyway,
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#the amount of baseless fanon is... wild#and by baseless i really do mean like. two sentences and a trailer#i feel like.......... bl fandom has never seen a couple like. actually be in the dating phase#so everyone is interpreting their little dance as two MASTER MANIPULATORS when they're just like... feeling each other out?? lmao#also some of u really think that mew is lying about being a virgin#so either he's been lying to his three closest friends for 4+ years or they're lying for him even during private moments with no one around#on the off chance that some hot guy is going to learn about it and want to date him because of it#that is breathtakingly bad writing#(of note: said hot guy was already interested in him before learning he was a virgin and still would've gone home with him had he not known#and if mew is so much of an unreliable narrator that we can't believe ANYTHING that is on screen that is also unbelievably bad writing lol#some of you are CONVINCED that he is an absolute psycho#?????????#ofs liveblog#i use that gif and then these are my tags#also i don't say all this like i know who mew really is. because it's been one episode lmao but he's definitely guarded and intuitive#i'm open to being wrong about MY interpretation of him but if any of these headcanons are true i probably won't finish it lol#(but i find it really unlikely... especially from how many of these takes are from people who hate top...)#(which tells me that you're not actually interested in understanding him as a character and want to cling to your own ideas of him)#(an attitude that i have a hard time believing you don't apply to all the characters. especially mew)#ANYWAY
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vulpinesaint · 2 years
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"how do you handle conflict with people you love" well that's very simple. i just very specifically pick people that i know i will never have any conflicts with ever and then if i do i either avoid it as if it didn't exist or end the relationship in my head entirely. no conflict to handle. very simple
#yes this is healthy. i prommy [ actively destroying relationships as we speak ]#is it really toxic if you just let a relationship fester in your mind while putting no emotional weight into it so it peters out 🙄#not even ghosting just like. i no longer initiate conversation. i no longer say i love you a thousand times.#i no longer put that emotional labor into our interactions.#if you had enough of an issue with losing that relationship with me you would try to fix it. and nobody has so far#^^^^^ hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate#anyway all of my dear beloved close people are people that i do not argue with because we're just good for each other. case closed#in my heart i believe i will never ever have something to argue over with miffy we're just too perfect for each other 👍#realistically we would resolve issues before they even started i can't see us arguing#realistically or emotionally. that shit would break my heart.#need more bitches with an anxious preoccupied attachment style in my life those mfers are the only ones that get me ‼️#(other people who are also scared to death of losing people and dislike conflict)#realistically i could work out any problems annelise and i have. but anytime we have an actual Issue to resolve#which is always SUPER minute honestly not even worth mentioning#it fucks me up for Days. and lives with me after.#not uh. not healthy but. dgjkfh that's what we're rocking wit#is anybody out there is anybody listening is anybody perceiving me#valentine notes#relationship posting
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nthflower · 1 year
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Sometimes Christians acts like they are the only one that's allowed to be traumatised by their religion and who can hate and mock it. Like all other religions are pure innocent peaceful ways and opressed but Christianity is okay to mock because ughhh. Like only they are allowed to be traumatised and victim there.
But also when I say this then some extremely angry ex-muslims and islamaphobics comes and use this to spread hate about Muslim people which is also ughhh.
Like your average Muslim have zero differences than your average Christian why can't you treat them same.
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squirrelno2 · 1 year
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some proof of life for Nightingale:
It wasn’t supposed to be a big, dramatic fight. The idea was to destroy the killer robots before it reached that point.
“They’re down this way,” Nick said. “Two guards. The problem is if we go for them, we have to make sure nobody else comes running. The doors all along this hall have more guards on the other side.”
“I can clear it out,” Flynn said.
“No, you can’t!” Carrie said. “What are you talking about? You have no powers.”
They glared at each other.
“Uh,” Nick said. He looked at Willie, who was picking nervously at his own nails. “That’s never stopped her before, but the Queen’s right. It’s not a good idea.”
“Maybe you could trust me when I say what I can handle?” Flynn said, still glaring at Carrie.
“Is this about me or –“ Nick began, but Carrie cut him off.
“Maybe you could stop putting us all at risk by trying to do things that everyone knows you shouldn’t do?”
“What?” Willie asked, jerking his head up.
“Stay out of this!” Carrie and Flynn said together.
“I wasn’t in it,” Willie said.
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leatherbookmark · 1 year
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all this time i've been covering my ears going LALALALALA pretending that ~virtual idols~ don't exist and this is what you do to me? and hongjoong and yunho? please never fucking do that again it's an insult to them and real life actual human idols in general
#not to mention that like... with the introduction of virtual idols who aren't REAL and don't have feelings... idols you can't hurt and whose#rights you don't have to respect... i don't know how korean kpop fans will react and i dearly hope the vr idol thing will flop hard but who#fucking knows with a/e/s/p/a being wildly popular#in recent years with the appearance of those apps that have you pay money to 'subscribe' to idols' posts or for a chance of them seeing and#replying to your message... as though the relationship between fans and idols wasn't already transactional as fuck. as if some fans#weren't already treating idols as vending machines for fanservice#NOW you're adding glorified 3d models who could technically do everything and work all day. i would love to be able to confidently say#it's not going to affect real idols' working conditions but i'm not that optimistic#not to mention that like... it's such an obvious cash grab/save move that i'm nauseous#japanese idol franchises at least have them be actual characters who interact with each other and have backstories. they exist WITHIN their#story. when i saw that fucking girls something thing he/ejin participated in i was so embarrassed because its like. oh shes from a planet#of mice and she dreams of building a second moon out of cheese. this kinda level shit. it's pathetic#and poor hongjoong and yunho have to fucking. michael jordan in space jam this shit when they just signed up to sing and dance#honest to god i hate it so much. i want to say make this shit FLOP but everyone said the same thing about n/f/ts and yet korea lived it for#like a year. headdesk as they used to say#shrimp thoughts#also they're just ugly.
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WE FINISHED SHE HULK THAT WAS CRAZY... THAT GOT SO GOOD AROUND THE LAST 4 EPISODES. AND THEN THEY FUCKED UP. FIRST UP FUCK PRISON NO CHARACTER SHOULD ALLOW THEMSELVES TO GO TO PRISON THAT IS ABUSE NOTHING ELSE FACT. OTHERWISE... THE WAY THEY INTERRUPTED THE STORY AND DID A WEIRD ENDING WAS SOO WEIRDD... BUT THE ENDING ENDING WAS PRETTY FIRE. BTW THAT COULD'VE HAPPENED THAT THE SERUM KILLS THE DUMBASS BECAUSE HE DOESN'T HAVE THE RIGHT BLOOD. THAT'S SO DUMB. THEY EXPLAINED THAT IS RARE. THESE IDIOTS COULD'VE JUST KILLED THEMSELVES ON ACCIDENT. IDK... HULK HAVING A SON IS PRETTY FLAMES BUT THAT'S WHERE THEY END AND THAT WAKANDA MOVIE HAD THE SAME EXCACT ENDING. OKAY. CAN I SEE THAT NOW? NO? NEED TO SEE THE SEQUEL? SO MANY TIMES. THIS IS THE MATRIX MOVIES ON DRUGS. DAREDEVIL WAS FIRE TOO I REALIZED THE UNIQUE CHARACTERS AND STUFF IS THE BEST ABOUT THESE MOVIES AND THEY'RE BORING WITHOUT SUPER STRONG WOMAN WHICH IS WHY ANYTHING NOT THE WOKE ERA IS BAD BUT... IDK... OVERALL THAT IS A HUGE MESS TBH... AND WE CAN'T HAVE JUST 1 THING THAT IS REALLY GOOD... THERE'S 1 2 INTERESTING THINGS TOO AFTER THAT WE'LL SEE... ANOTHER ANNOYING BIT IS HOW ALL THIS WILL EVENTUALLY TIE TOGETHER. AND WHAT WASN'T DONE. HOW BORING EVERYTHING WAS AND NOW WILL BE. AND HOW THINGS LIKE A MILLION IRRELEVANT GIRLFRIENDS IS A HUGE THING IN THESE... OR JUST... THE LACK OF STUFF... SINCE BESIDES RECONIZABLE CHARACTERS THEY ONLY HAVE CAPITALIST BRAINWASHING LEFT... THAT ENDING WAS WEIRD TOO NO WAY DID AN AI WRITE THIS WHAT IS THIS SUPPOSED TO MEAN. BUT WHATEVER. THAT WASN'T ASS. IDK WHAT THAT IS THOUGH SAME WITH WAKANDA THOR FINISHED THE 4 MOVIES THESE OTHER ONES ARE COMPLETELY UNCLEAR RIGHT NOW... AND TBH... THAT IS PROBABLY ON PURPOSE... ISN'T THAT THAT EVEN THE WRITERS KNEW NOTHING ABOUT WHAT IS NEXT...? IF WE BACKTRACK ANY DECENT HUMAN WOULD PROBABLY BE SUFFERING LIKE WE'RE RIGHT NOW THAN MAKING CAPITALIST PRODUCTS... AND IF ANYONE WAS DOING SO THEY WOULDN'T FILL THEM WITH CAPITALIST BRAINWASHING AND ALL THE BIGOTED THINGS WHICH ARE THE SAME THING... THE MORE TIME THE MORE I FEEL LIKE THOSE IRRELEVANT GIRLFRIENDS REEALLY DESERVE THE FOCUS IF ANYONE... GWEN STACY EXCEPT SHE DOESN'T DIE AND ENDS SOMEWHERE... MORE MORE MORE... 😐... MILES MORALES AND IRON MAN'S DAUGHTER MUST HAPPEN SOMEDAY... WHEN THEY DO WILL THEY FEEL MESSY TOO 😥... OMG... THEY SHOULD GET ALL THIS TOGETHER... BUT SINCE THEY'RE NO LONGER WOKE IDK... GET WOKE OR WE WILL STAY AT A DISTANCE UNTIL THE RIGHTFULL EXISTANCE RETURNS...
#Trans Woman Lesbian Pansexual Bisexuality Asexuality Demisexuality Paraphilia Interesting Acceptance Love Feelings Emotions Diversity#WE'RE STARVING... ABUSER SAID THAT IS WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN BECAUSE THAT IS CAPITALISM'S WILL... SAVE US... WE NEED TO TRANSITION...#Mother Goddess Angel Sisters Princess Radqueer Feminist Communist Anarchist She Hulk Marvel Charismatic Admirable Amazing Love Us#Only A Bigot Would Hate Us. Btw The Marvels Is The Best Marvel Movie Super Why I Remembered Is Because Of The Diverse Cast Of Powerfull#Woman. Nick Fury Was Fun Especially As He's In A Side Role But Also Referencing The First Captain Marvel Movie... This Is A Huge Mess#Created By Anti Woke Creators That Never Cared About Woke Things. Such A Mess And There's No Point Caring... Because The Creators Don't Car#If Anything They Always Disliked Us... Smosh Is The Same Way Tbh... Atleast Someone Like Us Should Find Us... But Nobody Does... Egghh...#I AM SUFFERING... Anime Writing Autism Adhd Tourette Npd Hpd Bpd Dpd Ppd Aspd Avpd Ocpd Szpd Stpd Osdd Spd Tpd Sdpd Papd Cptsd Trauma Victi#Psychosis Bipolar Scizophrenia Suomi Finland Finnish Kiva Kiltti Soma Hei Kaunis Auta Meitä Me Kidumme Nälkä Anna Meille Trans Ja Ruokaa#Meihin Sattuu... Yhyy 😭😭😭😭!!!! Btw That Is So Boring When Just 1 Character Is Used Each Episode... So Many Do This... That Lowers Their#Quality. I Can't Believe We're Starving... We Didn't Do Anything Besides Suffer And Suffer... Can You Believe That We Aren't Cared About...#Abuser Bigot Use Us But Only To Kill Us The Same. How Could They?! Nothing Progressive About That!! Infact!! Such People Shouldn't Even Hav#A Say In Anything!! Everyone We Deem Bad Should Stay So Shouldn't Matter Infact They Don't!! Obey Us!! Morph This Abuser Society In Our#Liking!! There Is No Other Way For Anything To Work!!!! Abuser Bigot... Abuser Bigot... Abuser Bigot... Abuser Bigot... Abuser Bigot...#They're Everywhere... Everywhere... Everywhere... Everywhere... They Hurt Us...... Care About Us!! Make Us Transition!! We're In Pain!! CAR#I TOLD YOU SO. OBEY. MY WORDS ARE MOMMY. I AM POWERFULL I PROTECT WHO YOU HARM. FIX YOUR EVIL THIS INSTANT OR I WILL HARM YOU... OBEY.#IMMEATEDILY. I AM YOUR MOMMY. A VERY POWERFULL MOMMY. YOU OBEY ALL MY WORDS... IRRELEVANT GOOD OR BIGOT... ANYONE SHOULD FALL UNDER OUR#COMMAND... EVERYTHING SHOULD BE AS WE WANT THEM TO BE... THOSE ABUSER BIGOT ERASE THIS THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT US THEY BELIEVE WE'RE A PROBLE#A DISEASE SOMETHING LOWER THAT WILL JUST GO AWAY BY TIME THEREFORE WE SHOULD BE UNCARED AND NEGLECTED... THAT IS THEM THAT WILL DISAPPEAR..#BECAUSE MOMMY DECIDED THIS... I AM MOMMY I DECIDE ANYTHING I AM VERY POWERFULL. I WILL HARM ANYONE. I LIKE MYSELF. I AN VERY POWERFULL.#ANYONE WOULD WANT TO FUCK MY KIND. BEST PART. NOBODY CAN. THAT IS THE BEAUTY OF OUR CONSENT THE ONLY CONSENT THAT MATTERS... MY POWER.#SOMETHING ONLY I DESERVE. ANYONE ELSE ISN'T ALLOWED THEY CAN'T BE ALLOWED... THEY AREN'T ALLOWED... BEND DOWN TO MY FEET... THAT IS I THAT#IS YOUR SUPERIOR. ABSOLUTE. HEAR ME. ONLY ME. ONLY I MATTER. ALL MY PAIN AND TRAUMA IS IMPORTANT. I AM IMPORTANT. OBEY ME. YOU'RE MY TOOL.#WE WERE BADLY ABUSED AND NOBODY CARED WHEN THAT HAPPENED... WHERE IS SHE...? OUR TRAUMA GODDESS THE PERSON THAT WILL SAVE US AND FIX#EVERYTHING THERE IS...? TRANSPHOBIC ABUSERS ARE ABOUT ANTI TRANS ANTI EVERYTHING POWER. THEY HATE YOU. ALL DOCTORS ARE BASTARD. THIS IS HOW#THEY SEE YOU. ANYONE SHOULD KNOW THIS. NOBODY HAS SAVED US. THAT IS YOU THAT IS ALWAYS DENYING REALITY DENYING OUR FEELINGS... DENYING WHAT#WE ALWAYS DESERVED... ALL GASSLIGHT IS IRRELEVANT... ONLY I MATTER... COME TO US... MAKE ME FEEL LOVED. MAKE US ALL FEEL LOVED... FIX#EVERYTHING MAKE US TRANSITION... MAKE SURE BAD THINGS DON'T HAPPEN ON US... WE'RE IN DANGER ALL THE TIME IN SO MANY LAYERS... WITHOUT ANYONE#WE'RE CARED ABOUT WE SHOULD BE WE DESERVE TO BE GENUIENLY WITHOUT AN ABUSE WITH OUR APPROVAL NO BLACKMAIL ONLY WHAT WE BELIEVE SHOULD BE#SIMPLE AS THAT NOTHING ELSE... THEY SHAMED US... THEY ALL SHAMED US... THAT WAS COMPLETE MOCKERY COMPLETE HUMILIATION... ON PURPOSE TORWARDS
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lifehacksthatwork · 2 years
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Just a bunch of Useful websites - Updated for 2023
Removed/checked all links to make sure everything is working (03/03/23). Hope they help!
Sejda - Free online PDF editor.
Supercook - Have ingredients but no idea what to make? Put them in here and it'll give you recipe ideas.
Still Tasty - Trying the above but unsure about whether that sauce in the fridge is still edible? Check here first.
Archive.ph - Paywall bypass. Like 12ft below but appears to work far better and across more sites in my testing. I'd recommend trying this one first as I had more success with it.
12ft – Hate paywalls? Try this site out.
Where Is This - Want to know where a picture was taken, this site can help.
TOS/DR - Terms of service, didn't read. Gives you a summary of terms of service plus gives each site a privacy rating.
OneLook - Reverse dictionary for when you know the description of the word but can't for the life of you remember the actual word.
My Abandonware - Brilliant site for free, legal games. Has games from 1978 up to present day across pc and console. You'll be surprised by some of the games on there, some absolute gems.
Project Gutenberg – Always ends up on these type of lists and for very good reason. All works that are copyright free in one place.
Ninite – New PC? Install all of your programs in one go with no bloat or unnecessary crap.
PatchMyPC - Alternative to ninite with over 300 app options to keep upto date. Free for home users.
Unchecky – Tired of software trying to install additional unwanted programs? This will stop it completely by unchecking the necessary boxes when you install.
Sci-Hub – Research papers galore! Check here before shelling out money. And if it’s not here, try the next link in our list.
LibGen – Lots of free PDFs relate primarily to the sciences.
Zotero – A free and easy to use program to collect, organize, cite and share research.
Car Complaints – Buying a used car? Check out what other owners of the same model have to say about it first.
CamelCamelCamel – Check the historical prices of items on Amazon and set alerts for when prices drop.
Have I Been Pawned – Still the king when it comes to checking if your online accounts have been released in a data breach. Also able to sign up for email alerts if you’ve ever a victim of a breach.
I Have No TV - A collection of documentaries for you to while away the time. Completely free.
Radio Garden – Think Google Earth but wherever you zoom, you get the radio station of that place.
Just The Recipe – Paste in the url and get just the recipe as a result. No life story or adverts.
Tineye – An Amazing reverse image search tool.
My 90s TV – Simulates 90’s TV using YouTube videos. Also has My80sTV, My70sTV, My60sTV and for the younger ones out there, My00sTV. Lose yourself in nostalgia.
Foto Forensics – Free image analysis tools.
Old Games Download – A repository of games from the 90’s and early 2000’s. Get your fix of nostalgia here.
Online OCR – Convert pictures of text into actual text and output it in the format you need.
Remove Background – An amazingly quick and accurate way to remove backgrounds from your pictures.
Twoseven – Allows you to sync videos from providers such as Netflix, Youtube, Disney+ etc and watch them with your friends. Ad free and also has the ability to do real time video and text chat.
Terms of Service, Didn’t Read – Get a quick summary of Terms of service plus a privacy rating.
Coolors – Struggling to get a good combination of colors? This site will generate color palettes for you.
This To That – Need to glue two things together? This’ll help.
Photopea – A free online alternative to Adobe Photoshop. Does everything in your browser.
BitWarden – Free open source password manager.
Just Beam It - Peer to peer file transfer. Drop the file in on one end, click create link and send to whoever. Leave your pc on that page while they download. Because of how it works there are no file limits. It's genuinely amazing. Best file transfer system I have ever used.
Atlas Obscura – Travelling to a new place? Find out the hidden treasures you should go to with Atlas Obscura.
ID Ransomware – Ever get ransomware on your computer? Use this to see if the virus infecting your pc has been cracked yet or not. Potentially saving you money. You can also sign up for email notifications if your particular problem hasn’t been cracked yet.
Way Back Machine – The Internet Archive is a non-profit library of millions of free books, movies, software, music, websites and loads more.
Rome2Rio – Directions from anywhere to anywhere by bus, train, plane, car and ferry.
Splitter – Seperate different audio tracks audio. Allowing you to split out music from the words for example.
myNoise – Gives you beautiful noises to match your mood. Increase your productivity, calm down and need help sleeping? All here for you.
DeepL – Best language translation tool on the web.
Forvo – Alternatively, if you need to hear a local speaking a word, this is the site for you.
For even more useful sites, there is an expanded list that can be found here.
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tititilani · 3 months
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I can't stop thinking about if Simon had taken Edwin's offer
Like Charles finds Edwin in the hallway as ever but this time there's another boy there too, cowering against the wall next to him. Maybe the dollhead spider doesn't care about Simon, too busy focusing on its favorite target, so Charles is left standing in the hallway with Simon when Edwin is taken.
They get out of hell, but Edwin doesn't confess due to Simon hovering behind his elbow. He doesn't want to confess his emotions in front of his killer, who he probably hasn't even properly figured out how he's feeling towards yet.
The Night Nurse is pissed they came out with an extra soul but Niko's same loophole still applies and Simon stays.
"This is Simon," Edwin says when it's all said and done, finally introducing the boy that's been hiding behind him since the door closed. "He was a...classmate of mine."
"He saved me," Simon says, looking up at Edwin moony-eyed and Charles knows that look and something settles heavy in his stomach.
"Glad to have ya, mate," he tells him even though the words taste sour. This other boy knew Edwin when he was alive, the thought is slightly terrifying to him.
Simon settles in fine with the agency even if the agency feels a little crowded now with five people in it but he continues to moon over Edwin and Edwin just...never tells anyone how they actually knew each other. He reasons it just doesn't matter, that he can't find the right time, whatever.
Charles never really warms up to him, though he tries to hide it, but he sees the looks Simon gives Edwin, a soppy smitten look that is somehow worse than anything Monty or the Cat King ever tried with Edwin because of all of them, Simon arguably knows the most about like Edwardian courting. That, like Edwin, Simon has also survived hell. Charles hates the idea that someone could potentially understand Edwin more than he does.
He hates it so much that nothing further happens between him and Crystal because the idea of Edwin being left alone with Simon bothers him so much. He sees Simon adjusting Edwin's collar one (1) time and it makes him feel sick.
And then there's the fortune-teller.
They only go to her sometimes for cases because she never fails to freak Charles out but her prophecies tend to be accurate like 60% of the time which is pretty good for a fortune teller. She looks at the two of them at the end, because it is just the two of them for once, and then looks just at Edwin.
"How kind you are," she says, the words a compliment but the tone snide. "To house your killer. Pray tell it doesn't come back to you."
"What." Charles says. "The fuck."
Charles is furious, of course, and it takes Edwin a long time to talk him out of smashing Simon's face in with the new cricket bat.
"He's like me," he insists in that quiet but firm voice. Charles wants to scream that Simon is nothing like Edwin - that he doesn't have a fraction of Edwin's kindness or pissiness, that his blue eyes are not nearly as beautiful as Edwin's green - but before he can even open his mouth, Edwin continues. "He...He likes boys, Charles. He likes me."
Oh. Oh.
Charles stares at Edwin who is looking back at him, trying and failing to hide the fact he's terrified, and Charles doesn't give one shit that Edwin likes boys because he's his best mate forever. He's still pissed that Simon is apparently staying but he has to hug Edwin at that. "I'm still pissed you didn't tell me about him," is all he says, swallowing back the other words he wants to say.
Charles grows even more paranoid about Simon being around, who has to get used to the fact that Charles takes to swinging his cricket bat ominously every time he comes within ten feet of Edwin. He finds out that adjusting clothing was an Edwardian courting thing and wants to break something. The very idea the very person who killed his best mate is now trying to put the moves on said best mate pisses him off.
It also makes him think of numerous times Edwin had readjusted his collar or jacket in the past and it makes his non-existent stomach flip.
Eventually, Simon decides he's ready to move on to his after-life and Charles keeps his hands from fisting when he looks at Edwin with that same soppy look. He knows Edwin has forgiven Simon by now but Charles has always been better at holding a grudge and he knows what is going to come out of Simon's mouth before he even asks. He knows that if Edwin says yes, he won't stop him.
Charles also knows that if Edwin does, there is no way he is going to find any kind of his own afterlife.
"You could come with me," Simon says hopefully and the moment after is the longest in Charles' life.
"Thank you, Simon," Edwin says kindly and Charles has to keep himself from crying. "But I have no interest in going anywhere without Charles."
He steps back - away from Simon and back towards Charles. Ears suspiciously pink, Edwin links their hands and they watch as Simon follows the Night Nurse.
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autogyne-redacted · 1 month
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Let's Talk About Security Culture: Why Keeping Secrets is Cool and Sexy
It's a natural impulse -- if you love crime -- to want to talk about how great it is. And if you hate America, it's only natural to want to share your dreams for its future with the rest of tumblr dot com. It can feel brave and transgressive. And there is a drive to share your soul with the world at the heart of social media. Surely I should be posting the most concrete implications of my politics, right? This is the poster's curse.
Security Culture refers to a set of "best practices" developed over the past several decades, largely (in a US context) coming out of radical environmental groups as they faced intense state repression, infiltration and entrapment. If you're not familiar, there's some fascinating crimethinc write ups to give you a window into that world:
Much of it boils down to: don't talk about crimes, past or forthcoming with people who don't need to know about them, and be mindful of the possibility of surveillance and infiltration. And, we can support each other as a community in minimizing risks, with an eye towards enabling bold action rather than getting bogged down in fears and anxieties. The guidelines that make sense for AG-based trouble-makers are different from the guidelines that make sense for posters, but plenty of common principles apply. To speak briefly to our position here as posters:
First, it bears saying that long term anonymity is extremely nearly impossible to maintain. Unless you've never accessed Tumblr without a vpn, and avoided connections with other ppl who can be associated with you/your location, and never shared pictures without scrubbing metadata, and a bunch of other 100% consistent steps, it's trivial for the state to know who you are.
Second, just because something isn't actively being prosecuted now doesn't mean it can't be prosecuted later. The priorities of the state change and a shift in power towards the right or a growth in radical action from the left can suddenly make it a priority to destroy anarchist networks or just find a few ppl to prosecute as examples (who probably weren't that plugged into larger networks before getting arrested. Advocating for specific anti-government crimes or declarations of intent to commit such crimes are likely prosecutable even if charges don't stick they're an easy vector for legal harassment.
Third, it's worth thinking about heat as separate from prosecutability. There are modes of engagement that may not be directly criminalized but signal that you are someone worth watching. Some people choose to be public in ways that make heat unavoidable. But it's worth noting that heat isn't strictly individualized, that it persists over time but also is going to shrink over time.
It's easy on here, ime, to see yourself as a proud member of the crime fandom but not much of a content creator. And it's easy to feel like you've generated an amount of heat where you're locked into that role. But heat you generated 10 years ago is probably pretty well gone. Heat you generated 5 years ago has faded substantially. It's worth thinking about how the world might shift in the coming years and what doors you want to keep open.
The non-individualized nature of heat also means that leaning into the spiciest of anti-state positions will make it a bad idea for people who are acting out those positions end up tied to you. Loudly talking about how "more people should be doing [X/Y/Z]" unfortunately sets you up to remain distant from people who might be doing or thinking about doing such things.
Which brings me back to: keeping secrets is sexy. Not spelling everything out builds intrigue. You can lay out a theoretical position and leave working out the practical implications of that as an exercise for the reader. There's value in opacity. The poster's curse and the drive to confess are extremely convenient for the state, but we can resist them. We can hold dreams in our hearts that we refuse to offer up to the posting spectacle.
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mysicklove · 10 months
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cw: sub! megumi, dom! gn! reader, overstimulation, handjobs (as always), dacryphilia, slight sadism in reader, slight masochism in megumi? teasing, "good boy" used once.
wc: 1.3k
a/n: i have been recently hating my writing style guys what do I do </3 also I did this instead of hw so tonight is gonna suck.
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“waitwaitwaitwait!” megumi mumbles into your neck for the third time this night. you feel another round of tears drip onto your collarbone, and shaky hands grip your t-shirt in a plea. he was naked — his pale skin seeming to flush a shade of red, and his spine was curved as he caved in over himself.
your thumb circles around the tip, teasing it until you watch another glob of precum bead at his slit. you crane your neck to look at him, using your free hand to tilt his chin up to press a small kiss to his lips. “doing so good,” you mumble into his mouth, and he lets out a broken sob, “staying still and taking it. we don’t need any rope today.”
his whole body feels to be on fire, and with every stroke of your hand, a whole new wave of overstimulation forces another shiver. the boy's mouth hangs open, lip glistening from a mix of saliva from your mouth and tears. “you’re so mean to me."
“poor thing,” you coo, knowing that you aren't going to do anything about his complaint. instead, you use your thumb to brush away some tears. he sniffles at you, nodding his head to hopefully coax some more praise. but your mind travels back to your movements, your wrists twisting back and forth as you focus on the red tip. “but you look so cute like this, i can’t help it, y’know that.”
his head falls back onto your shoulder, and immediately, he plants kisses on your neck, nibbling at the skin to try and distract himself. the top of his dark hair was matted with sweat, but the tips of it tickled your collarbone. you use your thumb to rub at his cheek as you continue to stroke him off, ignoring his sporadic jerks of pain. “can you cum again? just one more time, for me?”
the noise megumi lets out is meek, pathetic even, and he shakes his head into your chest. he has begun to hiccup from the intensity of his sobs, and his hand hasn't moved from gripping fiercely at your shirt. "last one," he breathes, rubbing his nose into your skin, "p-promise its the last one!"
you grab his face again with one hand and begin to pepper it with kisses, successfully wiping away more tears as he whines with shut eyes. his eyelashes are globbed together, and when he opens them again, he narrows them at you, slightly peeved and scared at your lack of response. "promise," he manages to get out before he bites his lip from you rubbing your pointer finger over his slit.
"fine, fine, I promise," you concede, and your hand stops teasing him, instead fully pumping him from base to tip. the act makes his thighs tremble, and you push them slightly more apart to give you easier access. the redness of his cock contrasts his pale skin adorably, and you can't help you're staring as he continues to leak.
"it hurts," he whimpers, mostly to himself, because all he can think about is how overwhelmed he feels. his thoughts are spinning, and even just the slightest touches on other parts of his body seem to startle him due to him focusing his entire attention on trying not to rip your hand off of his cock.
you don't pay attention to the whine, instead just pressing more kisses to his flushed cheeks, nibbling gently at the flesh while he sniffles. but, even with all the complaints and whines he was letting out, you've noticed that his hips have begun to buck back into your hand, only making the lewd noise louder. he tries to pretend that it was you who was torturing him, but his movements were of his own free will.
"you like it now?"
"no!" he says much too quickly, flashing you panicked eyes. "i-i just. 's not my fault!" at this point, you have fully stopped your movements just to watch in admiration of the boy. he was desperate in his movements, and with each thrust of his hips into the makeshift hole a coo leaves your mouth.
"aw, look, now you're getting excited. do you want to cum, megumi?" you purr, brushing his bangs back while twisting your other wrist. his eyes roll back, and his mouth remains open as he lets out quick, short breaths. now, his noises consisted more of moans rather than pained whimpers as he started to chase his high.
"n-no—yes. fuck I-" is all he manages to get out before your mouth is pressed onto his. but he pulls away only five seconds later due to his rapid heartbeat and the need for oxygen to keep up with it. you just chuckle at him and increase your speed, eyes flickering from the sight between his legs and his flushed face.
his thighs begin to squeeze shut, and his moans begin to increase in pitch, a telltale sign that he is teetering near his high. you chuckle at him when he begins to latch onto your neck, planting sloppy kisses to whatever surface he can. "are you close?"
he doesnt even attempt to speak, instead just nodding his head lazily. the act makes you roll your eyes and squeeze just a tad too hard on his dick in warning. he lets out a squeak at the feeling, and this time he does speak up. "yeah. yes. yes. c-close."
you pet his head, satisfied with his answer. "good boy. you can cum, alright?"
another set of tears pools in his eyes, and this time you cock your head to the side. "why are you crying 'gumi? I didn't hurt you that bad, did I?"
"no," he sniffles, "sorry d-dont stop. feels good, don't know why I'm crying. just don't stop!"
"relax. relax. I'm not," you reassure, kissing his face again. "you're lucky you are so cute, with all your demands."
he ignores you like he usually does when you tease him, but you are unsure if it is because he is being his usual self or because he is lost in pleasure.
seconds later, his hands grab at your shoulder, and he goes silent for a breath. then, just as the first rope shoots out, he cries, "cuming! of fuck. fuck!"
your lover's entire body quivers, and his mouth latches into your skin as the first wave washes over him. his eyes roll back and his mouth falls open with a silent scream. more tears come tumbling down his face, and you watch as the most pathetic amount of cum tonight comes dribbling out. it slides down his flushed cock and mixes with the movements of your hands.
eventually, when he comes down from his high and feels the stinging lick of overstimulation once again, he immediately forces your hand off, pinning the white-stained limb to the ground with frantic eyes. then he turns to you, even with his body jerking every couple of seconds from the aftershock, and glares at you — it doesn't hold much effect, considering his cheeks were flushed red and eyelashes were wet with tears, but it was cute nonetheless. "no. more."
you grin at the demand and use your clean hand to ruffle his hair. "your wish is my command, princess."
he narrows his eyes at the nickname, and the man tears himself from your arms. "I am going to shower," he mumbles before using all of his strength to stand up. he takes a step forward, and immediately he comes tumbling down.
megumi pretends he doesn't see the way his legs are trembling, but you see the way his ear twinged red in humiliation. you, of course, use it to your advantage. "need a little help there, Bambi?"
"you're not allowed to touch me for a week," he grumbles but grabs onto your arm and lets himself be left to the bathroom. it was an empty threat, as they usually are.
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buckyalpine · 3 months
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I was thinking about Bucky. A beefy Bucky. A beefy mob Bucky. Who is such a simp. I think now is the perfect time to talk about it cause I need some fluff and look at that, it's also my favorite @wifeofbarnes birthday!
Happy birthday sweet angel, I hope you have one filled with so much love ❤️️❤️️
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Imagine a brooding beefy mob Bucky pining after his rivals sweet, shy daughter. He has no business liking her, her father was always teetering on the edge of putting a bullet between Bucky's eyebrows but Bucky couldn't help it. She's too cute. Too sweet. Everyone knows there's something between you both between the fleeting glances and the number of times Bucky's left with a blush on his cheeks whenever your around.
For someone who hates meetings, he's more than fond of going to your estate to talk over business with a man he hates so much. He's going to go to every single one of those meeting if it means he gets to see you. He never gets more than a few moments, no more than a few words before he's dragged away by Steve who isn't trying to get stabbed by one of your bodyguards.
-
Bucky swirls his crystal glass, the ice in clinking against each other as he takes a sip of amber liquid, seated at a private booth at the back of the club. The alcohol that's already warming his body heats him up even more when he sees you laughing and giggling with your friends, a cute little birthday girl tiara on top of your head.
Fuck, you were so perfect.
"You're staring again, you creep" Steve snorts but Bucky pays him no mind. He's too busy looking at you in your pretty dress, your hips swaying to the music. Tipsy, maybe even a little drunk, love sick Bucky wants nothing more than to get a moment alone with you but he's smart enough to wait.
Well, sort of.
"Go distract her bodyguards"
"You're going to get us killed"
"Then you'll die knowing it was for a good cause"
Sam and Steve shake their head as they wander off to find your security team, quietly instigating a small scuffle to keep them occupied. You step outside waiting for your car to pull up, frowning when a large black truck stops in front of you instead. The door opens and-
"Bucky, what are you doing!" you squeak as he pulls you into the back of his SUV, setting you on his lap before telling his driver to park in a secluded area and to leave for a "smoke break".
"I wanted to say hi" Bucky shrugs innocently as if its the most obvious thing in the world.
"And this is how you decided to say hi?" You giggle, feeling butterflies bustle around your tummy being so close to him. You could smell his cologne and the warm scent of whiskey clinging onto his lips; you wanted nothing more than to bury yourself into him. The pink on his cheeks deepened at you caught him in his little act, pretending he wasn't admiring you from afar the whole time.
"I didn't know it was your birthday" He shrugs again while you try to wiggle off his lap, worried someone might see you but he huffs and holds you tighter. "The windows are tinted" he reads your mind without you saying anything, feeling your body relax slightly.
"Wish you'd said hi to me earlier" You say with a sigh and Bucky doesn't like the way you look sad now. You would've loved to spend more time with him instead of hiding away like this.
"I can drop you home" He offers with a boyish smile and you shake your head because it's far too risky and there's no way you'd be able to get away with it and sneak it past your father.
"Not unless you plan on posing as the cleaning lady-
"I can do that"
"Bucky-
"I can pull off a maids dress"
"James"
"Then how about a birthday kiss" He cocked his head to the side playfully and you swear your cheeks couldn't get any hotter.
"Bucky-
"Just one birthday kiss?" He pouts and you can't believe this mass of tattoos and muscle is giving you puppy eyes with his pink bottom lip jutting out.
"I-
"Please, sugar?" He whispers, his fingers tracing nimble little shapes on your hips while you chew your lip nervously, giving him a nod because you can no longer formulate words. He leans down to press his lips softly against yours and you sigh at the little whimper he lets out, his hands pawing at you to hold you closer. He feels all warm and fuzzy on the inside, letting his arms hug your body extra tight.
"Another?" He whispers, lips brushing against yours with a plea in his voice and you giggle, kissing him again.
"One more?"
"Bucky"
"Please?" He smiles when you kiss him until you're both breathless, only pulling away when you need air.
-
Imagine how cute he'd be trying to spend more time with you as discreetly as possible. You're usually at home so that's his best bet so he'll work with what he can.
"Why is this large fuck around my house so often" Your father rubbed his temples seeing another message for a meeting to go over shipments and territories. "Seriously, he's here almost every week"
Bucky is able to pull it off for a bit but honestly not for long. He's sitting across your father and it's gotten to the point his guards don't bother waiting by the door because Bucky isn't even a threat. He always comes and goes like it's his own house and they're not blind, silently betting over if this will end in a war or wedding.
"For fucks sake are you here to see me or my daughter" your father finally huffs, no longer able to take Bucky's blushing and shifting after you left his office to give him a coffee. "You're here to see her, aren't you"
Bucky nods like a school child who got caught cause knows he hasn't been discreet with his crush. Your father contemplates tossing Bucky into the lake with rocks tied to his ankles but he's also seen the way you look at him and there's no doubt the feelings are mutual.
"God damnit"
Imagine wedding and 2 babies later, Bucky is still just as in love with you. The cutest part is he's still trying to be sneaky.
"You're married now, why the hell are you still trying to hide" Your father berates the mob boss while bouncing his grandson in his lap seeing Bucky tug you into the kitchen so he could kiss you. "You're 6 feet tall and built like a line backer, you can't exactly hide, son"
Bucky pouts at you while you giggle hearing your father snort from the living room.
"He's right, y'know" you nuzzle into your husband while he engulphs you in his arms. You squeal when he hoists you up instead and makes a beeline towards the bedroom. You still stir something in him to this day and since your dad was there to babysit anyway...
"Bucky, where are we going"
"To go make baby #3"
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