#but yes me and miss piggy will be inside. probably doing nothing

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Will Ms. Piggy go out for her first Halloween?

likely not because i will not be leaving the house either <3

[horrorslashergirl]

I have a request, since they're open! Anything with the Collector x Reader x Chromeskull. I love that pair! Surprise me with what happens. Preferably angst.

The Collector x Reader x Chromeskull- Hazardous Toxicity

Authors Note: Getting some practice with angsty scenarios and these two see to fit the picture, because what’s not toxic about being in a relationship with a serial killer, neverthless with two of them.

Warning: Toxic Polyamorous Relationship

Words: 2.2k

You had a peculiar taste in men and that went with the fact that you didn't like routine or having a normal relationship with a normal guy with a normal job and a normal hobby. Normal wasn't an adjective or characteristic you were attracted to.

If you could describe what your preference in men was, you would start by saying that you always liked them older, maybe because you had enough of going on dates with guys your age that talked about the same topics; college, sports, nothing that would really spark a certain interest, but alas you were glad at the end of the date they preferred to remain just friends. Easier to get out and not make an awkward scene and probably explain why there was no chemistry.

The past relationships you had were to put it nicely, acceptable. The guys always let you take the lead; you ordered the food, you decided what movie to watch, what to do on a certain date. To be always in charge was tiring and you felt kind of empty. There was no excitement what so ever.

So, imagine the actual relationship you were having now. Never in your life would you predict that you would end up in a polyamorous relationship with two men that were much older than you. It was just a fantasy, one that turned out to be real.

To say that your partners were quite unique would be just an easy saying; they always stood out of the crowd, maybe one of the reasons you were so intrigued by them, but they were that type of standing out like 'He's so handsome and fuckable type'. Well, in your opinion, yes, but in your friends and people that knew you, they were downright intimidating. Possible another plus in your attractiveness book.

They had that certain vibe that if they wanted to crush someone's skull, they would do it, not that you minded because, in a certain twisted way, you felt protected because Lord helps the poor soul that would have the guts to hurt you.

At the beginning of the relationship, everyone said that you should be careful, be vigilant because you don't know them well; they were mysterious to say so, never putting all the cards down for you to see, making your stay on your toes and your mind always to wander to their personas. That was what made you be drawn to them, they excited your mind and the intimacy?

You never knew how much pleasure exists, nevertheless with two men like them. They always made you crave more, your legs turning to jelly and mind a mess, all morals flying out the window and letting your carnal instincts take over.

Everything was perfect because you felt cherished, they always treated you with all kinds of surprises, and sometimes it felt like they were competing for your affection and attention; the perks of having two alpha males.

They also had their differences, despite how similar Jesse and Asa were. Jesse was an extrovert, while Asa was an introvert. Despite Jesse being mute he always found himself teasing you, be it at first using the electronic reader and later on suggestive signing after you got better with ASL. Asa could speak very loud and clear but chose not to, only if he had something to say, which always was accompanied by an authoritative tone, more or less.

Both are very highly intellectual and that showed; Asa being a successful entomologist at the university and the many degrees and diplomas on the wall of his office spoke for him, not to mention how much he knew about history and art. Jesse was nothing less either, with running a successful chroming company, being a highly respected and feared CEO and it always amazed you how much he knew about information technology.

So basically your type was experienced, tall, intimidating, and smart.

After being for some time in the relationship, your known one always said that they were controlling you, which at first made you confused about this statement, wondering from where they deducted that.

Maybe you were a little blind, not able to see how they chose for you what to wear, what to eat, how you should do your hair. You saw them as a suggestion, but the ones outside begged to differ.

There also came a hard time when you were having trouble at your job, the economy was going down, your boss had to cut salaries and you couldn't afford to pay rent, not to mention that you needed to over-work; extra hours staying at work meant less time spending with your lovers.

They suggest that you should move in with them, switching from Asa's house to Jesse's depending on when they weren't working, plus they made you give up on your job, explaining how the money wasn't even covering how much you worked.

You agreed; maybe the lack of sleep, too much frustration, and injustice conducted you to agree with their proposition.

They took care of all your needs, be them material, spiritual or physical; they delivered it. You couldn't argue on that, but slowly, without you realizing it, they made you be dependent on them, seeking them whenever you felt like, but you were always the submissive, they owned the power and you only basked it what they emanated.

The apex of this relationship came when darker secrets came out because your curiosity got the better of you, not going to work that left you a lot of time to think and brown-noose into their stuff and business; the biggest mistake of your life, much worse than entering this hazardous relationship.

The first time your eyes looked over a photo-album of Asa's, you expected to see family photos, since he never brought this subject, you were interested in it, but seeing all the gruesome photos, you never thought a human could be shaped like this? This had to be some sick joke, right? But it wasn't.

You haven't told Asa about it or tried to question him, making sure you put the album exactly where it was. You debated if you should tell Jesse since Asa had to do some entomology related work for the weekend and you stayed by Jesse's house, but he had to go to work too, something about an unannounced meeting, leaving you to spend time all alone into his enormous house, so again curiosity got the best of you.

If you thought that Asa's photo album was gruesome, then the tapes you found in Jesse's Chrysler inside the glove box and trunk were sure going to give you nightmares.

You were pacing in Jesse's living room, drinking some whiskey to calm your nerves because you were sure that a breakdown was going to come, then it hit you. All the missing people, the murders on the news; you played detective and pin-pointed everything.

It all came down to you, the harsh reality; all the false sense of safeness and affection, it was pure-down manipulation, the undercover controlling that you were too blind to see because you were like a love-struck puppy to them.

The solution was simple; break up this relationship.

That's what you did, you wrote down a quick note, not explaining why you were leaving them, you just wanted to getaway. You left Jesse's place and walked for half an hour. Where? You didn't know, you had nowhere to go because all your friends left you; some that decided you were a lost cause, others too afraid of your men.

You had so much money just to stay at a cheap hostel for some days, but it was better than sleeping in a bus station on a dirty bench. Maybe you will go back to your parents? You didn't have a plan in mind.

The first night you couldn't sleep, not only because the bed was very much uncomfortable and the people in the room next to you were making too much noise, but because you felt like they were always watching; you were getting paranoid.

The next day, you managed to get some sleep in the morning, sleeping until it was the afternoon, the growl of your stomach waking you up. You walked to a cheap restaurant across the hostel, and as you took the first bite of the scrambled eggs and a little too burnt sausages, you grimaced.

Too accustomed to five-star meals and champagne, doll?

Alas, you swallowed down, reminding yourself that luxury wasn't an option in your current predicament. You sipped on the bitter coffee, the taste as truthful as the relationship which you ended, the dark liquid waking you up, and everything pouring down on you; it was only a game. The affection was only a camouflage for the twisted intentions, the protectiveness only possession.

After sitting there for hours and the waitress telling you that if you wouldn't order anything else you should leave, you walked back towards the hostel, walking upstairs to your room, entering and closing the door behind you, you were ready to hit the bed again, only to stop dead in your tracks when your gaze meets long black-clad legs, eyes moving up over the black clothes and wide chest and stopping on a bone-chilling chromed skull mask.

The bald head and tall frame of the mad was a dead giveaway to who he was, and when you heard heavy footsteps behind you, you knew who the second person was behind you, but your mind didn't want to acknowledge the scenario.

"Going somewhere?" the calm and familiar voice asked behind you, feeling Asa stop behind you, just a few inches away from his chest to press against your back.

'Piggy has been naughty.' Jesse signed, making your gut twist at the nickname he gave you.

"I-I...." you didn't know what to say, afraid of saying anything when your eyes saw Jesse twirl a large knife, clearly amused by your face that showed fear.

"You what? Trying to break things off without a specific motive?" Asa asked into your ear, gloved hands grasping your hips into a bruising grip, fingers digging into your skin behind your shirt.

Of course, they found out you were sneaking where your nose shouldn't be. Asa knew where everything he owned was, so it was no surprise when he found the photo album a little out of place, and Jesse? You cursed yourself for forgetting that he had security cameras all over his place.

Jesse moved off the couch and stalked towards you, looking down at your form and at this moment you really hated how tall and imposing of a figure he had. You were turned around and pressed to his chest, your eyes ready to meet Asa's face, only to be masked by a black-foam mask, making him look so very menacing, like a very dangerous spider.

You felt Jesse trail the tip of his knife up and down your thigh, his masked face pressing against the top of your head.

"You know what I am most curious about?" Asa asked, pulling out a knife of his own and trailing the blunt edge over your neck, the cold blade making your breath hitch.

"Any person in your situation would have called us in." he answered for you.

That's when it hit you, your eyes widening. Any person in their right mind would have gone directly to the police, telling them everything, you had enough proof to put them behind bars for the rest of their lives, but you hid out like a rabbit, ready for the wolves to find you.

"Aren't you such a loyal pet?" Asa murmured in your ear, the knife nicking your collarbone a little, feeling his hot breath and rough texture of his mask hit your skin.

'Someone has a little crush.' the electronic voice from Jesse's phone spoke, making you more aware of what was happening.

"P-Please....I won't tell anyone." you whispered, closing your eyes as you felt Jesse move his knife up and down on your inner thigh.

"I'm sure you won't. It would be a shame to kneecap you, queen bee." Asa said, sadistic promises behind the cruel words.

You whimpered at the nickname, one it used to make you smile brightly and nuzzle into his chest, feeling so loved and appreciated, but now it made you sick to the stomach.

'Very big shame to destroy such a cute face.' Jesse added, pulling his knife away only for his nitrile covered hand to come up and cup your cheek, running his thumb over your soft skin.

"Are you going to come home with us or do we have to train you through?" Asa asked, question rhetorical and by Gods, you didn't want to find out what it means 'training' in his mind.

Swallowing down, you nodded, doe-like eyes on his obsidian ones, his plush lips pulled into a winning lop-sided smile, then his lips pressed against your forehead, making you tremble a little.

Asa pulled away from you, walking towards the door, opening it. You were pushed forward by Jesse, who wrapped one long arm around your shoulder, making sure you wouldn't try to run away, not like you would get too far away.

As you passed the small reception you saw the owner of the hostel dead, into a pool of blood with his guts out.

This was a warning that this was not a childish game.

The meaning was simple; Try breaking things off with them and they will break your legs.

[willow-salix]

New week. New chapter!

And it's the return of Al Mungo!

Here's a snippet :

Selene paused outside the old fashioned tea room and took a deep breath, willing herself to go inside and not wimp out like she so desperately wanted to do. She peeked through the window, half hoping that they wouldn’t have turned up and that she could run away. She could call EOS and have the elevator there in like fifteen minutes and be back in her husband's arms in another ten, that sounded like the most excellent plan to her. Too bad that she could quite clearly see her mother and brother seated at a table waiting for her. Crap balls.

It wasn’t that she didn’t want to see them, although it was going to be all kinds of awkward after what Scott was calling the Al Mungo Incident, but also because she was going to have to tell them all about Nathaniel, and that was the part she was dreading the most.

“Come on, Sel, you’re a Tempest that married a Tracy, you shouldn’t be backing down from anything, let alone your own family,” she muttered under her breath. “Deep breath, push the door open and go in.”

For once she listened to herself without overthinking it any more and talking herself out of it, she shoved open the door and went in.

Celia was berating Adam about something, possibly his beard, which had little hanging crystals wound into it with what looked to be copper wire, his hair which had grown even longer and wilder or the fact that he was once again wearing the poncho that looked like he had simply cut a hole in the middle of a rug and stuck his head through. Actually, knowing him, that really wasn’t that far out of the realms of possibility.

Celia looked as she always did, her hair in its customary bob cut, reaching just to her shoulders, coloured a dark auburn, the highlights carefully maintained by the same hairdresser she had always used. Same long nose that both Selene and Adam shared, the same high cheekbones too. But her eyes were a warm brown rather than the blue that showed their Tempest heritage. Her clothes were that casual mum look, linen trousers and either a nice blouse or a vest top of some description. While you could never say that Celia Tempest looked glamorous, she was well put together, her clothing choices and colours usually complemented each other and she never left the house without some light makeup on and her earrings in. Celia prided herself on the fact that she looked normal, like someone that you would glance at in passing and notice absolutely nothing about her and she very much liked it that way.

“There you are, you’re late,” Celia said in greeting as Selene dropped down into one of the vacant chairs. “I poured you a cup already but it's probably cold by now.”

Selene took a polite sip of the tea, managing to not make a face. Her mother always forgot that she didn’t like tea and that, on the rare occasions that she could stomach it, she only liked the merest hint of milk and one sugar, not the gallon of moo juice her mother added and no sugar. She set the cup down and pushed it aside as nicely as she could.

“I’m really hot today and not really in the mood for tea, I think I’ll just order an orange juice.”

“But you asked to meet for afternoon tea,” Celia said, sounding utterly scandalised. “You can’t drink juice.”

“It’s not a law that I have to drink tea to attend tea,” Selene argued.

“It’s in the name.”

“Can we all just chill?” Adam asked, clearly already fed up with playing piggy in the middle between his family.

“Sorry, Ads, it wasn’t my intention to turn up and start trouble,” Selene assured him.

“There wouldn’t be any trouble if you’d just drink your tea,” Celia sniffed, “but you’re a married woman now and I’m sure you’re capable of making your own decisions.”

“I’d like to think so,” Selene muttered under her breath.

“If you aren’t going to drink the tea then at least have some of the pastries,” Celia said, pushing the elaborate stand closer to her daughter. Selene reached for a tiny cake, transferring it carefully onto her small plate, knowing that if she dared even so much as look at it wrong it would topple and splatter buttercream all over the white table cloth, her mother would never let her hear the end of it. Not that she really wanted it, she didn’t feel like eating anything at all.

“This is a lovely little place,” Celia sighed happily, pouring herself a fresh cup from the pot on the table and topping up Adam and Selene’s without asking.

“Yes, it is, Penelope recommended it,” Selene agreed, happy to be talking about anything other than the reason she had called them there. “I knew you’d like it and I wanted to do something a little special to make up for the fact that I’ve missed our last two Wednesday catch ups, I’m sorry, we’ve had a lot going on.”

“I just thought you were still annoyed with me because I dared to have a life away from you children,” Celia sniffed, clearly still a little put out with Selene’s interrupting of her date night with Parker.

“No, no, it wasn’t anything like that,” Selene promised, waving the thought away.

“Then what was it?” Adam asked, clearly not fooled by her act. For a laid back hippy it always surprised her how he could be so very observant and aware when the mood took him. “Is everything alright, Sis?”

Selene glanced up from the cake she had been mashing with her iddy biddy fork. “Sure, why wouldn’t it be?”

“Because you never invite me to these little lunches, and Jake said - “

“It’s John,” she reminded him.

“John said in his text that you had something to tell us both,” Adam finished.

Selene sighed, knowing she couldn’t get away with it much longer.

“It’s about Nathaniel…”

Read the rest here ➡

[delicatejisung]

𝐲𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐧𝐜𝐭 & 𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐯 (since some don’t agree that wayv is part of nct)

MAKNAE LINE:

♡ 𝓁𝓊𝒸𝒶𝓈 [luyan/lunna/yancas] :

- “MY BROTHER” duo

- literally supports and laughs at each other’s jokes everytime

- lucas had a teeny tiny crush on her when they were trainees but he claims he got over it

- they have a lot of inside jokes where they would suddenly nudge each other and laugh

- yanna nails lucas’ rap parts and he loves watching her do it

- “i want to be in nct dream” “i’m sorry but no”

- nctzens’ favorite moment: during that same exact wayv live (where yanna suddenly entered the room), winwin told yanna to greet the viewers but she said she had no make-up on. lucas then said “you’re pretty even without make-up” and yanna yelled “as expected from my brother!” before kun pushed her.

♡ 𝓂𝒶𝓇𝓀 [markyanna] :

- okay iconic duo

- lyk literal bros

- mark doesn’t see yanna as cute, he thinks she’s SUPER cool but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t like it when she’s being forced to do aegyo

- yanna cried like a baby alongside hyuck and jisung in mark’s last dream show

- “yo markeureeeeee” everytime yanna accidentally sees him in the practice room

- the dreamies revealed that out of all of them, she’s probably the one that misses him the most and she denies it all the time

- has lyk 3 songs together but sm won’t let them release them so they’re stuck in mark’s phone

- nctzens’ favorite moment: when they were filming the “walk you home” music video, their scene was at the playground. mark had to push the swing yanna was on but he accidentally pushed too hard and it became way too fast for her and she grabbed mark to make it stop but they both just ended up falling while the other members kept laughing at them.

♡ 𝓍𝒾𝒶𝑜𝒿𝓊𝓃 [xiaoyan/yannajun] :

- okay so here’s the deal with xiaojun, yanna finds him attractive

- lyk really attractive (because he is)

- and xiaojun finds her very pretty as well

- they both told kun about this and that was their first mistake

- because everytime they try to interact, kun shows up and teases them

- but there’s nothing going on between them

- they don’t really know each other much but they’ve hung out and tried getting to know each other since most of their friends are mutual

- nctzens’ favorite moment: when yanna reacted to the “love talk” music video with jaemin, she commented on almost everyone but immediately shut up when xiaojun’s part came. “why are you suddenly so quiet?” jaemin asked her but she denied it and continued talking about the other members.

♡ 𝒽𝑒𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇𝓎 [yanndery/henderyanna] :

- she finds hendery absolutely adorable

- she can’t even believe he’s older than her

- lyk he looks like a kid

- “he even looks younger than yang-“ “HEY”

- they’re not close but also not awkward, just friendly but not clingy

- she admitted that hendery’s eyes scare her because it was looking through her soul but hendery laughed and she was just lyk “ok he’s not scary”

- nctzens’ favorite moment: there was a video where the both of them kept on bowing at each other and ten had to pull hendery for it to stop

♡ 𝓇𝑒𝓃𝒿𝓊𝓃 [yanren] :

- ok, renjun thinks they’re twins

- yanna’s pretty sure she has seen renjun before

- literally though, they have the same aura

- small but vicious babies

- they agree on everything and it’s scares the dreamies sometimes

- that doesn’t mean they don’t bully each other, though

- piggy back rides!!!

- she buys him a beret everytime she shops because it really suits him

- he sends her moomin memes all the time

- nctzens’ favorite moment: renjun mentioned once that he wishes he met yanna sooner so he’d have a closer relationship with her like the one she has with mark, jisung, jaemin and jeno. yanna then said “if this isn’t close enough for you, we’d have to be married.” before giggling.

♡ 𝒿𝑒𝓃𝑜 [yanjen/nonna] :

- highkey adorable

- highkey shippable

- yanna just finds jeno adorable af

- jeno thinks yanna is someone he needs to protect all the time

- everytime jeno makes an adorable sound or just talks and she finds it cute, she’ll literally grab jeno’s face and pull it closer to hers sideways while laughing saying “you’re so cute”

- loves hugging each other

- you. will. always. find. yanna’s. hand. on. jeno’s. arm.

- she wears jeno’s things more than jeno wears them

- makes vomiting noises when jeno’s abs are a topic (also jaemin’s, she just doesn’t like the thought of her besties having abs people will thirst over but she also has them lol)

- obsessed with each others’ shoulders

- nctzens’ favorite moment: during a vlive, yanna’s head was on jeno’s shoulder when she started smelling his hair. she suddenly hit him and he was like “why?”, turns out jeno used her shampoo that day.

♡ 𝒽𝓎𝓊𝒸𝓀 [yanhyuck/hyucknna] :

- since yanna is pretty much like renjun, she also never backs down from hyuck

- “haechan cam with a viewer-“ “NOPE NO NO NONONONO”

- they ALWAYS fight and the members ALWAYS think it’s for real but they’re lyk “issa prank”

- except for that one time they really got mad at each other but we’re not gonna talk about that because only the 127 hyungs know about that

- “remember when you two fought because-“ “mark-hyung, shut up”

- hyuck remembers everything about yanna

- yanna likes reminding them not to put too much foundation on hyuck because she likes his skin

- nctzens’ favorite moment: “tmi, haechan is yanna’s first kiss” “NO ONE WOULD REVEAL THAT EXCEPT HIM” “atleast explain why and how it happened, it’s not like it was intended” “this really happened?????” (yup, that whole mess)

♡ 𝒿𝒶𝑒𝓂𝒾𝓃 [yanmin/nnamin]

- again, highkey shippable

- jeno and jaemin are her boyfriends tbh

- she literally dies when he’s being goofy

- they hit each other when it’s too funny

- clingyyyyyy

- “na jaemin’s mine” “yes, baby i am” “PLEASE STOP”

- she also cried when she found out jaemin wasn’t joining them for mfal

- cried harder when he joined them for “go”

- people always question why she doesn’t call him “hyung” when he’s a 00-liner and she just answers with “just because”

- if y’all think you’re confused if they’re in a relationship or not, so are they

- often have 2 minute-long eye contact

- nctzens’ favorite moment: when jaemin’s series was on-going, it seemed like the two were asked to interact less because yanna was obviously trying her best to avoid jaemin. one time, she got scared and hid behind jaemin’s back. as soon as she noticed, she started walking over to jisung who saw the whole thing and laughed at her.

♡ 𝓎𝒶𝓃𝑔𝓎𝒶𝓃𝑔 [yanyang] :

- yanna loves clowning him

- “GOT ME GOING THROUGH THE ROOF ROOF” “i don’t get it?” “ROOF ROOF” “what?” “YOU SOUND LIKE A DOG, YANGYANG”

- she thinks yangyang’s very intelligent and asks him to teach her

- they’re close but not the same level as the dreamies close

- they speak in english with each other a lot

- seriously, they just laugh a lot around each other

- nctzens’ favorite moment: yanna was on vlive with jisung and chenle when she pulled her airpods case out because she was looking for something inside her hoodie’s pocket. czennies saw the case and it was ice bear from wbb, they started asking where she bought it and she said “i don’t know, yangyang gave it to me”

♡ 𝒸𝒽𝑒𝓃𝓁𝑒 [yannle/yanchen] :

- chaotic duo

- it’s always yanna’s idea to mess with the hyungs, it’s just that chenle has more guts to do it

- she always babies chenle even though they’re the same age

- yanna literally can’t get through one vlive without touching chenle’s hair

- chenle can’t get through one vlive without reading a comment meant for yanna

- “yanna, do aegyo please” “no”

- no one believes they’re the same age

- yanna hits chenle when he lets out spoilers

- chenle likes pinching yanna’s armpit

- TAEYONG STANS

- always very supportive of each other

- nctzens’ favorite moment: chenle has a baby picture of yanna and he shows it off saying it’s his sister until yanna told czennies that it was actually her.

♡ 𝒿𝒾𝓈𝓊𝓃𝑔 [yansung/sungna] :

(i can’t add another gif i-)

- dancing duo!!

- jisung wanted yanna to join dancing high with him but she was too nervous

- they’re each others stress reliever when it comes to dancing

- yanna also takes good care of him

- “if jaemin’s your mom then who am i?” “your my mom’s spouse” “what?” “nice, jisungie”

- yanna’s always clinging to jisung’s back like a backpack when they’re sitting on the couch for a vlive

- dance covers!!!!

- jisung’s hand is big so yanna really likes playing with his fingers uwu

- nctzens’ favorite moment: during idol room, it was revealed that yanna‘s good at giving the silent treatment and when she was asked who she often has a hard time ignoring, she said it was jisung because he would start whining “why aren’t you talking to meeeee?” and she would find it really cute.

[jungle321jungle]

Level Two: Wait, You’re Not An NPC?

The world of Swords of Power and Conquest was one Virgil dove head first into, giving his soul and life to the game. He would play whenever he could, and had even decided he wanted to go into game design. At times he had even dreamt of how wonderful it would be to be inside that world for even a moment- until that world became his reality.

The familiar world he had come to love was now a foreign prison, one with no way out.

A Log Horizon AU. If you don’t know what that is, this is a Show Better Than SAO AU. If you still don’t know, the sides get trapped in a video game.

Ao3 - Masterlist

Taglist: @hells-missing-a-goat @angels-and-dreams @ollyollyoxinfree @gattonero17 @chumo-cookie @dreaming-always @anxiety-ismy-name @mrbubbajones @janustheliar

~~~~

Level Two: Wait, You’re Not An NPC?

Virgil wasn’t sure how long he had stood there. Stood there staring at his surroundings in shock and disbelief. But it was the familiar sound of a message which shocked him out of his stupor. Virgil’s eyes darted around him wondering how to open and answer- or if he was truly insane- when a voice sounded in his mind. 

“Tony?”

The voice was one which filled Virgil with relief to the point of tears welling in his eyes, but none of this could be real, right? Right? 

“Tony?” It asked again.

Virgil chose to indulge his own delusions as he wiped at his eyes. “Jack?”

“Oh thank God that worked!” The voice came from the other side of- of Virgil’s mind? “What the fuck is going on?”

“You’re asking me? This-” He stopped looking around at the forest and taking in the feeling of the sun streaming through the trees to let its warmth land on his skin, and the sound of animals running round. The sounds which were both so familiar and yet so foriegn. “This is all...” 

“I know. One moment I was sitting in my room, the next I’m standing in the Tavern. And I mean, not my character but- but me.”

The unsteadiness in that voice was something Virgil wasn’t sure he had ever heard before. But then again, neither was this situation. “I’m at the fork,” was all he said. 

“Then get your ass over here.”

With that the “call” ended and Virgil found himself moving. Leave it to Piggy to calm him down to a state of action with so few words. He wasn’t sure anyone else he had ever known was capable of such a thing. 

Virgil moved quickly. He ran down the path following the way he knew but keeping his eyes peeled. Monsters had always been in this area, but when the Tavern had been opened the monsters had become some sort of a rite of passage. If someone couldn’t get past them, then they didn’t deserve to be in the Tavern in the first place. That’s why he and Piggy together had placed the sign post and the teleport spot at the fork. It was a test. One Virgil hoped he could pass. 

He gave a hard swallow as he continued on listening carefully to the sounds in the trees, bushes and forest floor. But not daring to stop long enough to wait for something to find him. He was close. The Tavern would be in the coming clearing. 

Ralph was waiting for him in the coming clearing. 

It was when the breeze ceased that rustling became clear. Virgil’s breath shuddered but he didn’t stop and draw the sword he could feel strapped to his back. Not yet. As it grew closer and it’s footsteps sounded heavy Virgil reached back his fingers closing on his sword hilt- ready. He would wait as long as he could- because he couldn’t afford a fight. He couldn't afford the risks he had thought he had enjoyed. 

Virgil could feel the roar of the monster in his bones- in his core. Tyren. A level 28 monster resembling a mix of wolf and cat with claws which hold poison. They were generally weak on their own. But they had a habit of traveling in packs. This wasn’t a fight he could win- not anymore. All he could do was run. 

His heart drummed faster in his chest with every step he took. His eyes were burning with unshed tears but he couldn’t let them fall and obscure his view. Not when he could see the Tavern. Not when in a few moments he knew he’d be able to see the sign for the Serpent’s Den. Another roar sounded to his right. Followed by one to his left. And the growling from nearly all sides. 

They were going to trap him. To get in front of him and surround him and then take their time ripping him apart. He wanted to puke. He wanted to feel like the walls weren’t closing in. He wanted to be back in his room- hell he’d go back to taking that fucking exam. He’d go back to anything. Anything but this. 

He launched himself into the clearing not daring to look back as the roars continued. He sprinted for the back door praying to anyone who would listen that the door would be open. Thankfully his prayers were swiftly answered as the door burst open and Ralph was standing there crossbow in hand. Despite himself Virgil felt his lips curl into a smile as he watched his friend take aim. He ran toward him not bothered with where Ralph was aiming. It could be to his heart for all Virgil cared, it would be better than being torn apart. But he heard the whistle of an arrow flying past his head and the screech of a pierced tyren. He didn’t dare look back. 

It was close. Ten steps. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. 

Virgil threw himself onto Ralph sending them both flying to the ground and he could only laugh in relief as they both hit the ground, and the door slammed shut behind him. 

Virgil closed his eyes letting his tears fall as he listened to the sound of Ralph’s heartbeat. Ralph himself did nothing simply laying there, not saying a word nor pushing Virgil away. But after a moment Virgil pulled himself off and Ralph moved himself into a sitting position. Today’s face scanning Virgil with eyes that screamed worry. 

“I’m okay,” Virgil said finally. 

“No you’re not,” he disagreed. “No one’s okay right now.”

Virgil only gave a nod as he wiped at his face. When he had he looked back to Simon’s face unsure of what to say or do- but he found his gaze drifting above his head to the screen name which still managed to float about his head, lordofthelies.

“This is too real,” he said finally. 

Simon gave a chuckle, “Not the word I’d pick, but yeah. You sure you’re okay?”

“None of them got me,” Virgil assured him, but seeing the disbelief in Simon’s face he continued. “But I never thought I’d be scared of tyrens ever again. Haven’t worried about them since I got past level 45.”

“I’m not sure if alcohol works here,” Simon said standing. His eyes darted around his office before he extended a hand. “Join me in finding out?”

“Hell yes.”

They drank and sat in a comfortable silence and it wasn’t until Virgil could really feel its mind numbing effects that he spoke again. “Customers?”

“None,” Jack replied. “Today was the peace talk remember? I had closed in order to prep for the guilds which had rented out the space for a private space to talk. They had just walked into the forest and me back into my office when...”

Virgil nodded and knocked back the rest of his glass and reached to get himself a refill. “I had been out scrap picking. I had just teleported.”

“Have you been able to reach anyone else?” 

Virgil shook his head, “I don’t even know how.”

“To be honest I’m not entirely sure either. I was just thinking that I needed to message you no matter what; and then I heard the sent sound. And then I could hear you.”

“Have you gotten anyone else?”

“A few. Tact, Rolls, Bilder67. But for those who aren’t responding I don’t know if it’s because they’re not logged in or because of something else.”

“They probably don’t know how.”

Piggy’s eyes showed overwhelming disbelief but he changed the subject. “You should get some sleep. I’m going to stay up in case anyone comes.”

“But-” 

“You know where my room is.”

Virgil wanted to argue, but the thought of sleep was enticing, so he made his way upstairs to the small little loft and flopped on the bed, drifting off near instantly. 

~~~~

“Morning.”

“Morning,” Virgil mumbled back, moving to sit at the bar counter. “No one came then?”

Simon shook his head then he sipped at what must’ve been coffee. “None. And I’ve only heard back from Tact... but I figured out a few things.”

“Like how to cook us breakfast?”

A smirk graced that face as he turned slightly to face Virgil. “I was going to explain that I figured how to use game controls but I mean if you want burned eggs I can do that instead.”

“You can’t cook?” Virgil asked in surprise. 

“Not well.”

“And you own a Tavern?”

“A virtual tavern. Why don’t you cook and I’ll explain?”

“Alright,” Virgil shrugged, hopping off his stool and making his way to the kitchen. He paused upon entering it, “How do I even access food? Is it in the cabinets? Or my inventory?”

“Ah, so you do need to know how to play.” Simon smiled. 

“Just hand me food.”

Simon shook his head, “You need to learn. Basically focus on what you usually see on the computer screen.”

Virgil raised an eyebrow but when Simon made no move to do anything he closed his eyes picturing his screen in his mind. In the top corner left would be his health. In the bottom right would be the mini map of the area, and his five saved skills. In the bottom left corner would be the inventory he’s wearing, the stats of his clothes and his sword. And in the top right would be the bar for him to access skills or inventory. Picturing it all he took a deep breath and opened his eyes and nearly stepped back in shock to see his screen as pictured. 

And he wasn’t exactly sure if he was shocked or relieved to see his HP at 73%. 

“Push inventory,” Simon advised. 

Virgil nodded and reached up to hit the word inventory and was surprised to see as the boxes appeared. For a few moments he scrolled through what he had, before he found some eggs and he apprehensively moved to tap the icon. Except his arm went into it and his fingers closed around a large egg. He pulled his arm back and the large egg came with it- he needed to take it in two hands to ensure he didn’t drop it. 

“Nice,” Simon nodded, moving past him to turn on the stove and setting a pan on the burner. “I want it over easy.”

“You’re getting scrambled.” Virgil replied, setting the egg on the counter and already searching his inventory for some milk. “This thing is too big for me to flip it. It’s scrambled or nothing.”

“Fine.”

They lapsed into silence as Virgil worked, but a question was still burning in his mind. “The Starter Village... it’s probably safest there, isn’t it?”

Jack gave a sigh, “Probably. But it’s also probably swarmed with people thinking the same.”

“Safety in numbers?”

“Chaos in crowds.”

“Avoid people then.”

“That’s not what I mean. I said I talked to Tact right? People are rioting in the Starter Village. And most cities. They’re gonna deplete all their resources. Meanwhile it’s just the two of us here, we’d last longer here. And if someone makes it here? Well, if we’re gonna survive we need strength. People who can make it here are strong. We know that much.”

“We don’t even know if we can make it here anymore,” Virgil pointed out as he put the eggs on a plate. “But I get what you mean. Is Tact coming here?”

Jack gave a shrug as he handed Virgil a fork and poked at the food. “I don’t know. He said he wanted to gather information first, but I doubt he’ll come this way until we figure out what happens when HP reaches zero. And if health potions work.”

“I hope they do.”

“Same. And when people do get here. I think we should lay low for a while. People will probably swarm you for new armor and swords. Maybe we can get more information from listening to the chaos. But it might be a few days before anyone comes.”

Virgil only nodded, not wanting to acknowledge that they could really be here that long. 

~~~~

Nine days. 

It had been nine days since Virgil found himself trapped in the game he had fallen in love with. And he still found there wasn’t much he could do. One day four he and Jack had been bored and daring enough to step outside the Tavern, to see how their swordsmanship fared against one another before even daring to take steps in the woods. 

From it Virgil had learned he could still use basic moves and swing his sword well enough. And he had also realized he could use his saved skills or very basic skills the same way he had accessed his inventory. But now one day nine neither he nor Jack had figured out how to do both simultaneously. And it seemed the few customers and coworkers which had trickled in didn't have a clue either. They had all run for their lives and stuck to the basic skills and had barely managed to make it to the Tavern. But all of them agreed that despite the danger outdoors the Tavern was safer than the cities which were rapidly running out of space, and due to fear of going hunting players were running out of money and had resorted to robbing one another. Virgil could only hope those people wouldn’t come his way. 

“Hey! Anthony! Get me another beer!”

Virgil only blinked at the drunk customer (blueskiesareyellow according to his screen name), “Hello sir, would you like to browse my shop?”

“Beer! I want to buy beer!”

“I’m sorry I don’t sell that item. But I do my best to sell all sorts of armor, weapons, and rare items. Would you like to look around?”

The man gave a look of disgust and began shouting at one of the Tavern girls, MannaM, to get him a beer. “Damn NPC. Good for nothing.”

A woman further down the bar gave a laugh, and Virgil recognized her as one of his repeat customers, FuckThisImTheB3st. “Be nice to my man Anthony. He’s got some good stuff to sell!”

Virgil gave him a slight smile, “Hello ma’am, would you like to browse my shop?”

“Not right now,” she dismissed. 

“Alright. Please let me know when I can be of service.”

On any other day this would be considered horribly slow. Only six customers, and two workers. Usually they were packed all days of the week with players gossiping information to be sold to the highest bidder. But now all they had was a depleting amount of food and alcohol to be sold. And Virgil wasn’t entirely sure what they would do when they’d run out of food, Simon claimed he was working on it but Virgil doubted he knew either. 

The slamming open of the Tavern door was something of a surprise. Then it walked three faces which Virgil recognized. Virgil tried to keep himself calm as one of which locked eyes with him and stormed up the counter and slammed his hands down on it. “I need the owner. Now.”

Virgil gave him a smile, “I am the owner of my shop. Would you like to browse?”

“What? No- I want the guy who owns this place.”

“I do my best to sell all sorts of armor, weapons, and rare items. Would you like to look around?”

“No! I want to speak to the owner.”

“I am the owner, sir. Would you like to browse-“

“Are you even listening to me?”

“He’s an NPC dumbass!” FuckThisImTheB3st shouted. 

Tact stepped up next to his companion. “Hello Anthony, May we gain entry to your shop?”

Virgil gave him a smile and moved out from the behind the bar and led the way to the hidden door. He unlocked it and stepped into his shop. Inside Simon stood holding out an armored vest to a player, kittycat=patt, but both looked up as Virgil entered. 

“Tact!” Simon smiled. “Good to see you.”

Tact gave a nod as he moved forward leaning on his cane as he did. “I’ve told you many times to call me by name and not that uncreative nickname.”

“And since when do I listen to you?”

“Roman! Remus!” kittycat=patt smiled. “It’s good to see you both! I haven’t seen you both since the Dragon Raid!”

“Patts!” <3getting2Dsat1 cheered running forward to embrace the other girl. The two started talking quickly and suddenly but Virgil was still trying to process that TheSwordTwins- aka the duo with their own YouTube Channel that Virgil had watched every video from were casually standing right in front of him. 

“Tony, lock the door?” Simon asked, stopping Virgil from staring. When the door was locked all of them sat down at the table leaving Virgil standing. 

“Hey Lies,” royaltyforroyalme or Roman started. “Can you tell your NPC to stop staring and leave?”

Simon paused before he shook his head, “He stays. Anyway Tact, why are we all here?”

“My name is Logan,” He corrected instantly. “I am a tactician for the pay, it’s not who I am. But as for why we all are here I have two pieces of information to share. And lucky you for you I won’t charge a fee.”

“How generous.”

“The first is I have seen first hand that just as when this game was purely game, revival is possible.”

“You’ve seen it?” kittycat=patt blurted.

Logan gave a nod, “I have. I had posted myself outside of the East Hospital and was awaiting to see if anyone revived. And someone had. Two evenings ago I was about to head back to the inn where I was staying when the tell tale glow of the building started and a player appeared in front of it proclaiming and crying in relief at still being alive. I kept my post until this morning and confirmed this was not a fluke by watching it happen multiple times and I also interviewed each of the revived players. Thus I can conclude that when a player's HP reaches zero they come back to life as a character should. But at the same time it doesn’t seem to be a pleasant experience.”

“I think that’s the best thing I've heard since this started,” Piggy commented, relaxing in his chair. “But what’s the second piece of information?”

“I have a theory- or perhaps hopeful thoughts on how to get out of here.”

“What is it?” Virgil blurted moving closer. 

“Ah, is that what it takes to get you to break character Anthony?” Logan asked, amused. 

“Answer the question.”

Logan nodded. “The main quest. This game was designed so that it would update itself when the main quest was completed. Perhaps a fix to the servers can free us. That’s why I asked you all here. Lies is not only a legendary holder, but one of the biggest names in the information trade. Roman and Remus each hold one as well, and when I called both they told me Patton was as well. And you Anthony are certainly high enough level to aid us.”

“That’s a gamble.”

“It is,” Logan acknowledged. “But it is better than simply sitting and waiting for rescue?”

“Wait,” Roman cut in. “You’re not an NPC?”

Virgil blinked, “No. I’m not.”

“Then why?”

“People are more likely to talk about things when they don't know they’re being listened to,” Piggy commented. “And now since the joke wasn’t as funny as I intended, Tony come sit.”

“I can’t go get a chair, everyone out there doesn't know I’m not an NPC.”

He patted his lap, “Sit.”

“Fuck off Piggy.”

“Am I not good enough to sit on?”

Virgil resisted the urge to punch him in the face as he looked back to Logan. “If the game reboots if the quest is cleared, wouldn’t that just kill us?”

“As I confirmed there is no death as we know it in this world, that is unlikely,” Logan replied. 

“But how are you going to do it? We’re still missing five swords. Not to mention the main quest is literally impossible. That’s why no one has done it!”

“There was no motivation to. Before the goal of most players was to simply enjoy the game for all about its main quest. We simply need to shift focus.”

Virgil shook his head, “Ralph tell him it’s impossible.”

Ralph paused in thought before he sighed. “We don’t have any better ideas at the moment. And at least it’s something.”

“What if we only have a limited number of lives?” Virgil tried. 

“There’s only one way to find out!” Remus cheered. “Roman! Stab me through the boob!”

Roman paid his brother no mind, “He does have a point. We don’t know if our luck will run out.”

“I think we should go for the swords,” kittycat=patt tossed in. “If it’s possible we can get out quicker shouldn’t we?”

“Do we know where the missing swords are?”

At that Logan turned to Jack, “What do you know?”

Jack gave a frown and his eyes flickered to Virgil before he crossed his arms over his chest. “Before we talk about that we should talk about logistics.”

“What's there to talk about?” Roman frowned. “Either you have the information or you don’t.”

“The game ends when one person collects all ten legendary swords. Shouldn’t we discuss who will be doing the holding of these swords? Because quite frankly I don’t know anyone sitting here well enough to believe you won’t steal everything and sell it.”

“I want to go home, not make money!” kittycats=patt said quickly. 

Logan gave a nod, “We both know I have gold to spare.”

“I want to get back to my life,” Roman agreed. 

“How much money do you think you’re all worth?” Remus asked. 

“Remus.”

“I’m kidding Ro! Kidding! I wanna get back too... mostly. I mean can you blame me? This is cool as hell.”

“I suggest we each hold onto our own swords until the end,” Logan stated, putting things back on track. “And as for acquiring more, I suggest the person who claims it carries it. And once we have them all between us we figure out how to clear the game itself. Until then we have no choice but to trust one another.”

For some reason Virgil wasn’t sure he liked that idea. 

“We’re going to need to practice fighting,” Virgil pointed out. “Jack we could leave the Tavern to MannaM and head to a low level area to grind and figure it out.”

Jack gave a nod of thought, “We certainly could.”

“Have any of you figured out how to use the skills?” kittycats=patt asked. “I can use the easy ones but I can’t do any combinations.”

“I can,” Remus tossed in. “You just gotta move and it kind of happens.”

“I’ll need you to be a bit more descriptive,” Logan frowned. 

Remus gave a shrug and pulled at the mustache on her face. “They just happened. Like muscle memory or something.”

“Hm, then training will need to proceed. Perhaps you can tell us what it is we will need to know about the other locations when we have?”

“No, I’ll tell you here,” Jack sighed. “I know this is the most secure spot. I can only hope your lips are sealed just as tightly.”

Virgil wanted to disapprove, but he knew Simon was right. “Well maybe first we should start with what swords you all have and then Simon and I can tell you everything we know?”

There was a pause as eyes looked round the table before Logan spoke, “I hold the Sword of Time.”

���I have the Sword of Ice and Water,” Patts announced. 

“Sword of Sound,” Remus put in. 

“Wind,” Roman said quickly. 

“Faces,” Simon finished. “As for the others, I know that two elemental swords are still fully unknown, some rumors say they are in circulation others say they are yet to be claimed. I personally believe there’s truth to both sides. One of them, likely the Sword of Stone, is in circulation, given the Sword of Flame is pretty distinct. Someone would know if it was used. The Swords of Darkness and Light are also both unclaimed. Tony has a theory on those. And then the Sword of Stars is in circulation. Last I knew it was in the hands of a guild, so Mr. Guild Hopper might know something.”

Roman crossed his arms, “I don’t.”

Simon didn’t seem convinced but he let it slide. “Tony, your theory?”

Virgil gave a sigh, “The location of the Sword of Darkness isn’t exactly a secret. But despite that no one has been able to get it given the pitch blackness, and the boss monster. According to the lore to the game, the sword belonged to a fallen angel who tried to attack the heavens. When he lost and died the sword created the barrier to protect him. Meanwhile the Sword of Light was considered tainted and needed to be purified. But my theory is this, that given the true quest of the game is to unite all the swords, that the Sword of Light and the Sword of Flame must both be used to retrieve The Sword of Darkness.”

“I don’t understand,” Logan frowned. “I understand wanting to use the Sword of Light but why Flame? It’s said that any lights are automatically extinguished within the dark.”

“Yes, but there’s multiple reports about the boss monster inside. Some seem to think it’s the fallen angel himself revived, some say it’s a dragon, some think both. But all seem to agree that they were certainly burned inside the dark. Now perhaps the Sword of Ice and Water could put it out. But if the Sword of Flame is used it could theoretically form a protective shield of flames to absorb those thrown at us. Or something to that effect.”

Logan paused and Virgil could see the wheels turning behind those glasses, the Tactician's mind working. “Then after training we’d need to go after the remaining sphinxes and gain clues about the Swords of Stars, Light, along the way.”

“I can continue to check in with my network,” Simon promised. “But we need to be careful about people knowing we’re going after the swords.”

Virgil gave a nod before a thought occurred to him, “Eric please do not tell R3M333. He’s not subtle.”

“He’s not that bad. He’s good at collecting information, just not keeping it...”

“Please Eric.”

“Fine.”

“Real quickly,” Roman put in. “What should I call you? Because you’re not-NPC has called you like ten different names.”

Eric blinked as if the thought hadn’t occurred to him, “Tony is a bit of a nerd. See my screen name is lordofthelies. But he read it first as lord of the flies, and ever since he calls me by the name of different characters from the book. But you guys can call me whatever, Lies, Lord, or-”

“Sexy?” Remus asked. 

Eric gave an awkward smile, “I was going to say my middle name is Dante. You can me that or Dee. Trapped in a game or not, I rather not give you my first name.”

“Pleasure to meet you Dee!” kittycats=patt smiled. “I’m Patton! Call me that or Patt! But before we leave, can I buy some armor off of you too? As much as I love this outfit it’s not good for defense.”

Virgil paused looking over Patt’s oversized skirt and heels silently wondering how she had managed to make it to the Tavern in the first place. “Yeah feel free to look around my shop.”

~~~~

“You think this is all a terrible idea don’t you?”

Virgil looked up from where he was sitting on Dee’s bed and gave a slight nod, “I don’t trust them. And yet we just told them everything, Dee.”

“Not everything.”

“Oh?”

Dee raised an eyebrow as he sat beside Virgil on the bed, “I know you lied about your theory. That’s not it at all.”

Virgil gave a shrug, “You don’t know that.”

“Yes I do. I may not have heard your theory before but I know that’s not it. I just know you’re a good liar. But I also won’t ask you to tell me what it is.”

Virgil looked into his eyes- those actual eyes. The way Dee has designed the character before he had earned his legendary sword. “Then what are you asking of me?”

“I ask that you don’t trust anyone.”

“I take it that includes you?”

“I’m number one on that list.”

Virgil gave a yawn as he laid back on the bed, “Then make sure I’m number one in yours.”

~~~~

Level One - Level Two - Level Three

[rwbyremnants]

WARNINGS: Winter/Ruby: teacher/student roleplay, hot wax, scene interruption, under the table action, accidental exhibitionism, accidental parent/child incestuous feelings (no actions).

 (Also, reminder that the Jacques Schnee in this story isn't very similar to the one in canon)

Oh... this chapter. Haha we almost didn't go through with it, since it treads very close to a specific line, but it was just too fun an idea to resist. Hope you guys enjoy it~ and Happy New Year very soon!

=Chapter 7

"Oh wow… yep. That’ll be perfect."

Ruby and Penny had been discussing a few details about the session she would be going through with Winter for the evening, about how she was expected to already be in a particular costume and begin the scene as soon as she entered the door. What had Winter requested? A school uniform. It wasn't something that completely surprised Ruby, but was certainly new and unexpected. Her time at Signal High didn't require a uniform at all!

Thankfully, Penny had come to the rescue. They were both a similar size, and upon hearing Ruby's dilemma, she immediately offered up her old uniform for her to use. Penny had attended a high end private school in her youth in comparison to Ruby's public school, and knew that the uniform wouldn't come cheap. So she saw no point in allowing her girlfriend to go out and buy one when she had one stashed in the back of the closet.

Satisfied with how it fit on her, Ruby turned from the wardrobe to look at her girlfriend. "And you're sure I can use it for this, right? Like, no second thoughts?"

"Of course," Penny said, mostly focused on her laptop screen. "I do think it's strange, of course, but I'm also not using it at all. Why shouldn't you and Winter get some use out of it?" Then she sat back slightly. "There. What do you think about this? 'I am a highly-motivated Berkeley graduate, seeking to enter the workforce and to bring the skills I have gained there and from real life experience to my new employer in a field that offers potential for advancement.' Good, or is it too wordy?"

"Wordy is good! They're always looking for wordy. And if you go for an interview, you're just as smart when you talk as you seem on paper," Ruby complimented. Taking the jacket off the hanger she inspected it closer. Penny's fathers really didn't spare any expense; the material looked wonderful! It almost seemed a shame to use it for some clandestine purpose in Winter’s torture chamber.

"Alright," Penny sighed, finally looking up from her laptop. She gently, not saying anything for a moment. "You look wonderful today. I wish you had gone to my school; it really suits you."

"You think so?" she asked, placing the jacket gently on her bed so it was out the way for her showy little spin, one that made her giggle when she felt the skirt drifting up slightly. "It would have been kinda cool, but I think my dad would have missed me too much to let me stay there all that time."

"Probably true; he didn't want you to go to college where you did, either." Penny giggled as she picked up the little roll of black material that had been on the corner of her desk, standing up and crossing to the bed. "Now, you promised I could do the honours; that's the deal for getting to use it."

"You just wanna see up my skirt," Ruby teased. But not wanting to disappoint her partner, she held out one of her legs, giving her toes a small wriggle to tease further. "Ready!"

"Sit," she ordered, and Ruby did so. Then she took the ankle and gave each toe a delicate kiss. It was different than Winter's reaction to her feet; while she seemed to be drawn to them magnetically, against her will, Penny simply enjoyed doting on the smallest, most insignificant parts of her romantic partner. Who just giggled in response. She always enjoyed how tender Penny was toward the simplest parts of her. From the top of her head to the tips of her toes! Waiting patiently as Penny pulled up the tights, she blushed again.

"And you don't mind if these… rip, do you? The tights, I mean."

"Not the tights. The rest of the outfit, I would appreciate it if you tried your best not to harm it. At least, not in a way that can't be fixed with dry cleaning." Picking up the second stocking, she again kissed Ruby's toes as she said, "But Winter had better not harm these little piggies or I would be very upset."

"Oh, she won't." Chuckling to herself once more, that actually reminded Ruby of another subject to do with Winter. One that she hadn't actually mentioned to Penny yet. "Funnily enough… she actually likes feet. A lot. It's something I didn't expect."

"Really?" Penny asked, hands only halfway raised to put on the other stocking at last. She glanced down at the feet, one covered and one not, then back up at Ruby's face with a slight smile. "Well, why shouldn't she? They are adorable; yours especially."

"Yeah I guess toes are kinda cute and small, but like, sexy? I mean, I got nothing against it, whatever floats her boat." She smiled again, pushing the foot into the stocking as Penny held it open. "Winter's really mysterious like that. I barely know any of her kinks."

Penny's smile was gentle as she tugged the stockings into place perfectly, then reached down and picked up the fabric-covered feet, cradling them fondly in her hands. "They are nice. I mean, as far as I can tell, since 'sexy' is a strange concept for me. So I will defer to Winter." The smile turned mischievous as she kneaded into the soles with her thumbs. "What if… I had control of one of them, and Winter had control of the other? Would you enjoy that?"

"Hmm…" Looking upwards as she allowed herself to relax, Ruby rolled her foot slowly into Penny's motions, softly groaning from how pleasant it felt. "Both massaging? Well, hey, I like being pampered…"

"Massaging for me. I'm not sure what Winter's preferred activities are." Again, she kissed the feet through her stockings and then picked up her saddle shoes, slipping them on. "Have… you talked to her about your romantic feelings yet?"

Deeply sighing, that once relaxed smile faded away. Instead she leant forward again, staring into nothingness. "No… I still don't know if I should. I don't know if Winter's Aro or not, but she's never really had a relationship, or dated or anything. Maybe she doesn’t want that with me, and it might just make things weird."

As Penny continued tying her shoes for her, she said reasonably, "Well, you can't know if you don't ask. Perhaps you should pose it to her as a question; simply find out whether or not she would be open to doing romantic things with you. If she says no, then you don't have to tell her that you're already feeling that way."

"Penny, you know me better than anyone else. You know I'm not that slick. She'll see through that a mile away." Resting her chin on her hands, she continued to stare out blankly, already giving up without trying.

"Oh, Ruby…" The job done, Penny got up and sat next to her girlfriend, hugging her close. "You're a beautiful, sweet, wonderful woman. If she's going to feel romantic feelings for anyone, why wouldn't it be you? And if she doesn't, then I'm sure it's only because she doesn't feel that way about people – the same way I don't feel sexual desire for people." Then she lowered her voice and added, "Though I can make exceptions for my little Rubáiyát."

That had managed to bring a smile to Ruby's face. Somehow Penny always seemed to manage that with her, even when she was in her lowest of moods. Turning to face toward her, she wrapped her arms back around her partner, giving her a big kiss on the cheek before she nuzzled against her. "And you are just as sweet, just as beautiful; inside and out. You're so good to me, Penpen."

"Just protecting my investment," she joked in a gentle tone; an old joke for them. "Love you."

The smile turned into even more of a grin as she nuzzled again, softly stroking her shoulder. "Love you more."

-------------------

For the thirteenth time, at the very least, Winter checked the clock on the wall. Resisted temptation to call Ruby, or text her; to triple-check she was on her way, since she had passed double-check quite some time ago. As she sat in the chair, legs crossed and one shoe bobbing up and down anxiously, the elder of the Schnee sisters again reconsidered why she cared so much. For most subs, if they were on time, that was fine. For Ruby… being on time wasn't good enough. She wanted her there much earlier, so they could begin right away; have plenty of time to chat once their session had ended.

Because you care about this one, a small voice in the back of her head whispered. Too much.

She silenced it with a physical wave of her hand. Yes, she obviously cared about Ruby; she was a friend and a sister-in-law, besides her favourite person to dominate. Those were plenty of reasons to cherish her greatly. And if she found herself fantasizing about more than simply deriving sexual pleasure from the girl…

If she found herself wishing she could wake up next to her more than just the once in her life…

The sound of the doorbell shattered those thoughts, and she now found herself grateful. Pulling out her phone, she sent Ruby a quick text, smirking to herself all the while. It was time to begin.

Just as eager to start, but anxious for what was to come, was Ruby. She patiently waited outside the door to her Dom’s flat, holding her hands in one another to try and maintain her focus. This was to be slightly different from their last sessions, in that she would be thrown straight into the role. No preparation, no film and drink. They had already agreed on the terms over the phone, with their usual safety word in place. As soon as Winter would open the door, they were in-scene.

The text only read: Door unlocked. Come to the office, first door on right; bring in what's outside.

“She really is prepared,” Ruby breathed to herself Quickly pushing open the door and stepping inside, she shut the door tight behind her; she saw no point in locking it, not with Winter's reassurance that her roommate was out for another weekend. Besides, she had not been instructed to do so. Following the message to the letter, she headed straight for the hallway, toward the office.

Sat outside the door was a backpack. When Ruby picked it up, it didn't seem to weigh much. Just an average school bag. No doubt she expected Winter wouldn't want her to look inside until she got in the room, so she didn't. Finally, she turned the knob on the door, slowly pushing it open.

The room was very different from when she had glanced in before; then, it had been a fairly dull office space. A few filing cabinets, a fine oak desk, and a potted plant… and literally nothing else. Just a place for Winter to do some of her work when not upstairs in the main Schnee offices. Now…

Now it was a classroom.

“Whoa...” she couldn’t help breathing as she gaped at her surrounding. The dull painting that had hung on the far wall had been replaced with a blackboard, and the couple of other comfortable chairs vanished in favour of smaller student desks. There were only two, but that was enough for realism's sake, given that this was for play. A globe stood on one of the filing cabinets, and there was now a bookshelf with a full Encyclopædia Britannica racked up along its planks. Winter's own desk was the same, but the contents on top had been changed out for a syllabus, a stack of papers to be graded… and a shiny red apple.

"You're late," Winter said in a firm tone from where she sat. Though Ruby could only see her from the waist up, she could see one of her crisp white blouses that she wore to work had been augmented with a cardigan, the sleeves tied around her neck so the rest draped over her back.

"S-sorry, Miss Schnee!" That seemed to fit the role. Ruby had guessed they were doing a teacher-student thing, but not for the entire office to be changed so drastically! Straight away she went to take one of the seats – the closer one, as Winter expected her to, resting the bag on the table.

"You are already in trouble, so the least you could do is be punctual for your punishment." Then she sighed, a very slight cloud forming in front of her mouth, and set about straightening a few of her papers. "And I am sorry about how cold it is in here; the heat is inferior in this room, and with only the two of us in here to lend our body heat…"

"O-oh…" Thanks to the jacket, Ruby hadn't noticed just yet. She had only just opened the bag: a few blank books, some papers, and a pencil case. Her student didn't know if they would be used or not, but it was worth getting them out anyway just to make sure. "It won't happen again," she reassured, setting them on her desk. "And… do you want me to write lines, Miss?"

"Yes I do." Picking up a pair of square-framed spectacles, she pushed them onto her face as she scooted her own chair back. "Given that you aren't much of a troublemaker in my art class, I see no reason to make it too strenuous. Let's say… fifty times. And nothing too long, either."

Then Winter rose and turned to the board. From there, Ruby could see she had her now-red hair in a bun, and was wearing one of the tightest black pencil skirts she had ever seen. Her hand grasped a piece of chalk, then wrote in loopy cursive on the board:

I, Ruby, have been naughty.

"Okay… I can do that." First thing first, she opened the notebook on the first page. Although she was expecting it to be clean, she was mistaken…

Right there, on page one, was a large heart in brilliant red marker. In the middle of it was written in blue, "Ms. Schnee + Me". There were a dozen little hearts drawn around it, as well, in various hues and sizes. So dark was the press of the marker that the next several pages past it had experienced bleed-through.

Oh GOD. Ruby's face went bright red. Not only was she already distracted by the resemblance Winter had to her teacher that she had once described, something that had prompted double take; but Winter had embarrassingly marked the notebook for her! Straight away she could be heard loudly turning the pages, trying to find a single one where there wasn't anymore bleed-throughs and eventually, halfway into the book, she found one.

Sighing in relief, she then went to unzip the pencil case. Only to find that wasn't the only surprise. The first thing to emerge was a pencil, of course; it rolled neatly up against the spiral of the notebook. After that rolled out a small plastic device, shaped like an overlarge medicine capsule, about the size of her thumb. It seemed to be twistable at the centre. There were other things inside the bag, too indistinct to see without tumping them out, as well… but even in shadow, they certainly didn't look like school supplies.

Blinking again in surprise, Ruby was beside herself. There were rather suspicious items in there, and love notes all over her book. And with how well Winter now resembled her old teacher, she didn’t know what to do besides take the pencil in her left hand to begin writing, and cover her mouth with her right in a vain attempt to try and hide the intense blushing she now has all over her face. This “lesson” was going to drive her mad.

Shivering as she sorted through her papers, Winter said, "This won't do. Hang on, I think we have…" Opening one of the lower desk drawers, she made a good show of rummaging around for something in there. Up came a candelabra of long tapers, and two smaller candle holders with small, squat red candles in them.

"Keep to doing your lines," she said offhandedly as she saw Ruby looking, producing a box of matches. But when Ruby looked up again, she couldn't. She had scarcely even written three lines, before she realised what Winter was doing. She was playing directly into the kinks she described; the teacher-crush, and the wax play. At least, she expected that was what they were for. Winter didn't just do decoration for the sake of it.

But when her “teacher” looked up again, Ruby quickly got back to it before she could say another word, quickly writing more lines as fast as she could. Nodding in satisfaction, Winter finished lighting the candelabra, then blew out the match. The room filled with the acrid smell of sulphur as she flicked it into the bin. Then she used one of the tapers to light the two smaller candles.

"This isn't much, but I hope it will help," she sighed as she stood, carrying the smaller ones over. The minute she came around the desk…

A powerful scent of strawberries filled the air between them. The tapers might have been simple wax, but clearly those two weren't. Unable to help herself, Ruby hummed; the scent was relatively strong, enough to relax her a little more. But not enough to ignore the still wonderful sight of Winter. She had nailed the look of her old teacher perfectly, from the shades to the bun. Not only that, but the outfit she was wearing didn't leave much to the imagination, either.

Hey, I wonder if she's still wearing that plug from the other session. But the instant that thought crept into her mind, Ruby pushed it down, trying to get back to her lines. You dummy! She wouldn't have kept it in for that long!

But after her twentieth line, she thought, Then again, she could have always put it in again for you before you got here, maybe…

The clack of her black heels against the white tile floor gave nothing away, whether or not Winter had a plug inside of herself. When she bent away from Ruby to set down the first candle on the other desk, showing her pert, rounded posterior, there was nothing sticking out too obviously that Ruby could see. However, when she turned back with the other one, she found herself face-to-face with the girl.

"Miss Rose, what were you doing a moment ago?"

Looking up from the lines and toward her, she found her shoulders shrugging as more. Rendered utterly speechless as per the norm with Winter, she stuttered and stammered, trying to come up with some form of response. "U-uh… I-I was, um… w-working on my lines, Miss Schnee?"

"I… thought you were watching…" Shaking her head slightly as if to rid it of a stray thought, she reached to place the candle on the corner of Ruby's desk - and knocked the small pink object to the floor. "Oh, your eras-"

Her voice cut off when a quiet vibrating filled the air.

Immediately, the blushing on Ruby's face got even worse. This was so embarrassing, even if it was part of the session! She looked straight back at her lines again, red as the apple on Winter's desk. All she could say after that was, "That's not mine! I swear!"

As Winter picked it up, Ruby was granted a generous glimpse of cleavage; not as much as Winter might have shown her otherwise, but a little just above the knot of her cardigan. A little pendant hung down, swinging back and forth above her ample bosom, which was cut off by a lacy black bra. She couldn't resist taking a peek at that. Blinking repeatedly while Winter collected her “eraser”, she continued to stare. God, how she wanted to just get on with things and for them both to have their way…

No, she had to wait. Had to wait for whatever punishment Winter had lined up.

"Well, this…" Winter blinked at it in mild confusion for a moment, playing her part well. Then she cleared her throat nervously, twisting the device to end the noise. "You must have taken out this… neck massager instead of your eraser."

"Yeah, I must have! C-clumsy me!" Ruby giggled nervously, though soon got back to her writing again. She had to, it was the only thing keeping her sane anymore. But the fifty lines were done long before she thought they would be. On to whatever she had planned next. "Done, Miss."

Having just settled both candle and "massager" on the desk, she looked down and said, "Have you, already? Then… hmm." She leaned down and placed one hand on the side of Ruby's desk, the other draped over the back of her chair as she leaned down to study the lines.

Her chest was now so close that it was resting just the slightest bit on Ruby's shoulder. Already, she could feel her breath beginning to hitch up, her body temperature heating up. If Winter wasn't an agent for her favourite popstar and sister-in-law, she would suggest a teacher would be a good role for her.

"Very good so far. Now then… how about we try fifty more lines, something else? When you finish that, you can move on to your homework." Her hand trailed very lightly over the back of Ruby's neck as she drew away and walked back up to the chalkboard.

"Hmm…" She lightly shuddered when feeling the soft fingertips, finding herself watching quite closely. Each sway of her hips was alluring. Biting her lip gently, she asked, "What lines do you want next?"

Raising her delicate hand, this time Winter arched her back slightly as she erased the previous line, causing her plump backside to be more prominent. Then she went for the chalk and wrote:

I wanted Ms. Schnee to punish me.

Once again, Ruby swallowed in fear of what was to come. Winter was simply building it up, but it was already going to her head. She could feel herself beginning to heat up more and more as she began writing on the next page, trying to be as neat as possible to impress her.

Meanwhile, Winter seated herself for a minute, pretending to go over her lesson plan. Who knew what was written in there, if anything; perhaps she had even borrowed it from an actual teacher. Either way, she was certainly dedicated to making the scene authentic. That was what managed to get Ruby going the most: Winter had gone all out once again to make this as best an illusion as she could. Right down to the shiny apple.

A few minutes later, she sat upright again. Lowering her pencil, she cleared her throat and announced, "Finished, Miss Schnee!"

Without looking up from what she was "working" on, Winter said in a dispassionate voice, "Bring your notebook up here, please."

Swallowing again, Ruby held the notebook open to the right page as she rose from her seat. Pacing over, she did as she was asked, placing her punishment on her temporary teacher’s desk. Her only hope was that 'Miss Schnee' wouldn't turn the page.

Winter barely glanced at it, too absorbed in her lesson plan. From where she stood, it could be seen that she had filled it out, after all: the page was open to the current date. Written in very bold letters was: Alone time with little Rose. Blinking in surprise, Ruby couldn't help but begin to read the parts of the page she could see. For now, most of her arm had covered the rest up, but she read the next item on the itinerary quite easily: Get her undressed.

Finally, Miss Schnee did glance up at the notebook, then further up at Ruby, as if she had forgotten she was standing there all the while. "Yes?" she asked.

"O-oh! Um, sorry." Ruby anxiously shrugged her shoulders again. "Do you want me to sit back down?"

"Please. You should still have your art homework to complete." She started to turn back to her syllabus, then looked up with a slight smile. "These individual projects were fun to choose for my students. Have you taken a look at yours yet?"

"I-I haven’t," she admitted, slowly walking back to her seat again and pulling the chair out. But before she sat… "Remind me again, Miss Schnee?"

"You should have it in your bag, I hope," Winter sighed in an aloof tone, flipping a few pages back and forth in the lesson plan. "In the envelope I gave you earlier today. If not, then I'm not sure what else you'll do for the rest of detention."

"Oh, sorry! I… Forgot." She quickly made the excuse, taking her seat and picking up her bag from the ground to rummage through it's contents. Sure enough, there was the envelope that Winter spoke of, still sealed. Taking it and opening it up, she took the note from it and began reading.

Please take your time and do as good a job with this as you can, with whatever media you see fit; pencils, pastels, or paints. It counts for a quarter of your grade. Then, behind the note, was a picture…

And what a picture. It was an eight-by-ten glossy photo of Winter, sitting forward in a wooden chair with her wrists bound in the small of her back, facing away from the camera. One eye was looking back over her bare shoulder, but with the blindfold and ballgag, it was hard to tell for sure it was her.

For a moment, Ruby had to hide the photo from view. Winter seemed to have discovered that even though she was no Dom, Ruby enjoyed seeing her in such a submissive state just as much as she enjoyed being dominated by her. After regaining her composure, she pulled the selected picture back out again, taking a closer look. Even if it was presented without context, it was truly a beautiful photo; well-lit, the angle was perfect. How much more had she spent on this good of a photographer alone?

Able to sense she was being watched by Winter, she quickly placed the picture back down, covering it with her pencil case. "U-uh… I was just… Uh…"

"Doing your homework?" Winter prompted with a bemused smile, making a gesture over toward Ruby with her red pen. "That's the idea, isn't it? Just do your best; you know I grade on effort and overall improvement, so don't worry about if it's 'perfect' or not."

"Cool, cool… I think I know what I can do."

Taking out a sketchbook that Winter had placed within the bag, she went through the pencil case again. Perfect; a black ballpoint pen. It had been a long time since Ruby last made art, but whenever she did, her weapon of choice was ink. She began to roughly sketch the basic outline, mastering the different shades by the amount she had to scribble against the page. She began with the darker tones first, the small of her back against her bound hands, continuing up her arms and the rest of the piece. It was quick and rough, but the shape was pretty accurate to the photo.

Ruby was just putting the finishing touches on her masterpiece when Winter's voice reached her, sharp and clear even though it was still on the other side of the room. "What… what is the meaning of this?"

It was enough of a distraction to cause one line to go slightly too far. Probably something Winter wouldn't notice, but something Ruby cursed herself inwardly for. Looking up, she asked, "What? What is it?"

The teacher was holding open Ruby's notebook, still with the other hand gripping the cover as if to close it. As if she had accidentally flipped to the front page and was on point of closing it the rest of the way… when she saw. Her eyebrows were knitted in very convincing confusion.

"Is… this some kind of joke? One of your friends teasing you?"

Her time drawing had completely wiped her memory of the embarrassing notes in the book. And now there they were, right in her face. "I… U-Uh… I don't know h-how that… I-I…"

"This looks like your handwriting," the woman persisted. Her voice had been sharp before, but seeing Ruby's reaction was causing it to grow softer and softer. "Like it…" Finally, she closed the cover as she coughed into her fist, eyes on the other side of the rectangular-framed spectacles averted. "But you can't have feelings like that. This is a v-very cruel joke to play on your teacher and I am not amused."

"I'm so sorry," she began, looking down at the table in shame. Unfortunately the fact there was a picture of her bound and gagged right in her vision wasn't helping; it was only making her core heat up all the more, and the blush to flare up once again. "I-I don't know what I was thinking. I was just… I-I…"

But Winter had opened it again, staring down at the garish heart. Her cheeks were getting a little pink themselves, though not nearly so much as Ruby's. After another second, she closed it again and shook her head, standing up and striding around her desk.

"We can't have this going on. It could lead to a lot of unpleasant questions for both of us, you understand?" Then she very carefully added, "Regardless of… whether or not this is a joke."

"I swear, Miss Schnee, I didn't mean to embarrass you!" Even if it wasn't something she did at all, she still felt humiliated by the sheer insinuation of it. Slowly she looked up toward her again, eyes still wide and nervous.

"I know you didn't. You've always been a near-perfect student. It's… been a real pleasure having you in my class, Ruby. Every day, I looked forward to seeing you most of all." Clearing her throat as if realizing she had gone a bit too far, she instead walked closer to Ruby's desk. "How is your project coming along?"

That filled Ruby with a bit of confidence. Picking up the paper, she turned it in her direction immediately. It was a rough drawing, but more than enough for Winter to see Ruby's style of artwork. Scratchy edgy lines with different pressures tones the piece, with softer lines in the light parts to keep it reasonably neat. It was a talent Ruby rarely displayed anymore, but she wanted to do a good job.

For just a moment, Winter was completely speechless. Her mouth opened several times, closed again, opened. Then she finally whispered, "Strawberries."

That made Ruby raise her eyebrow. She lowered the piece again, suddenly seeming a lot more nervous than she was in play - which was now paused. "Did I do something wrong?"

"Ruby, that's really good," she hissed, barely moving from her position. The Dom seemed to be desiring not to break from their play too much. "Sorry, wow, I just wasn't expecting… I'm honestly really impressed you did that just while we were in here."

"Really?" Turning the drawing back to herself for a moment to take another glance, she began to smile again. Turning it back, she asked, "Did you wanna keep it after this? I mean… it wouldn't be this good if the photo wasn't top notch. Did you hire someone to do that?"

"Yeah," Winter whispered, biting her lip and smiling as she nodded. "It was an ad on KinkHub that I answered; the shoot was free, so long as he could have free reign with the pictures that didn't clearly show my identity. Like that one, because of the blindfold and gag."

"It's… I mean, I know for you both, it's a kink thing, but it's sort of an artsy pic," Ruby noted, placing the drawn image down right by the photos side. Bar a few slight flaws a casual observer would never notice, it was more or less a perfect copy with the shading. Clearly no one had seen Ruby's art skills apart from teachers and her father.

"Thank you. And sorry, I just had to stop play because, I mean, my next move was going to be yelling at you and demanding to know what you had drawn. I wanted you to know first that I thought your drawing was truly exceptional."

Her face was glowing with pleasure as she stood there, still holding the notebook full of lines. Even though she was still blushing wildly, Ruby was grinning from ear to ear, looking down again to her rather quick drawing. When she realised there was one final touch she needed to do. Taking the pen again, she quickly signed and dated one of the corners, before pushing it back beside the photograph, looking up with the still beaming smile.

"I hope you'd like to keep it, then. All yours!"

"It should be in a gallery somewhere, but… I'd be honoured." Clearing her throat, Winter seemed to come back to the moment. "Right, then - sorry, that really was bad form to stop play, but I couldn't have concentrated until I let you know how talented you are. Ready to begin again?"

Scratching the back of her head for a moment to compose herself, Ruby simply continued to smile happily. It was an honour to hear Winter's delight with her drawing more than anything else. But now that she knew where the play was going, she had to sit back down and recompose herself. "Begin play."

Winter's eyes slid closed, and she took a deep, slow breath in. When they opened again, they looked shocked, very realistically. "Wh… what on earth have you drawn, Miss Rose?! What is that?!"

This time, it was a little more obvious she was acting more than normal, and she seemed to withdraw into a shell, drawing the image back toward her. That, of course, revealed the photograph right next to it. "I-I… That was the photo I got! See?!"

"No, you…" The "teacher" gulped, her hand trembling as she reached toward it. "No, no, you couldn't have - there's no… I d-didn't- you were supposed to have a still life of nature, I'm sure- how did you find this?!"

"It was in the envelope, Miss Schnee," she said rather shyly, pushing the photo toward her. "I th-thought… you gave it to me on purpose – like you were making a pass at me or something, I didn't know!"

Her eyes swiveled between the two images, the original and the artist's rendering. Then she looked back up at Ruby, her cheeks a deeper red and a guilty look coming over her. "It wasn't on purpose. I… I know how this seems, but… Miss Rose, I would appreciate you not telling anyone that this happened. I promise you, I didn't…" Her chest began to heave, and her voice turned into a harsh whisper. "I am not the sort of woman who harasses her students!"

"I never assumed that!" she squeaked out. Unfortunately now that she was more clued in about the subject of play, the words didn't sound genuine. Something she would have to work on in future perhaps. "You said that our subject for this assignment was 'helplessness', right? That's what I assumed this was. There are so many ways it can mean that!"

"W-well, I guess that's a funny coincidence…" Under her breath, she whispered, "That was supposed to go to Glynda; I must have sent her the picture of a dog with its head stuck in the bannister. Wonder what she thought of that…"

"Possibly not as sexy as this image…" But in her haste to make a joke in character, she realised what she had let on instead, and immediately looked wide eyed. "I-I mean, I don't- well, n-not that you aren't sexy! Well you are but… I-I…"

Winter's eyes were wide as she stared at Ruby, cheeks still rouged. After a few more seconds, she shakily asked, "You… weren't trying to play a prank on me, were you? When you drew thi- OOP!"

The notebook caught the edge of the candle as she brought it up to show Ruby again, knocking it over. Most of the hot wax landed on the table, but a drop of it splashed onto the back of the student's bare hand.

And instantly Ruby found herself yipping loudly. She brought her hand in by instinct, but by then the wax had already cooled onto her skin. Before then, however, it was very satisfying to feel the warm sensation – just enough to send a tingle or two down her spine and make her sigh with enjoyment.

"O-Ooohhh…"

"Are you alright?!" Winter demanded, laying the notebook on top of the photograph as she snatched up Ruby's hand, bringing it in toward her face to examine the spot of wax closely.

Face reddened again, she realised that she had done the worst thing; moaned out loud in enjoyment. Way to hold back! Drawing her hand away again, she nervously looked down. "Y-yes, ma’am! Sorry, I'm fine! Just… Just surprised me! Y-you know how dorky I am!"

The woman didn't quite look satisfied. "You're sure? I could get you some ice, or…" Almost as an afterthought, she reached back and righted the candle. "What you must think of me today, giving you obscene homework and burning you…"

"No way, Ms. Schnee," she reassured, rectifying her desk a little more to place the photo on top of her artwork. At least then Winter had the option of taking it back if she wished, or even just leaving it till the end. In truth, Ruby just enjoyed seeing it. "You… you could never do anything wrong. You're the best teacher."

"No… no, I am not." Taking up the hand again, she looked at the little disc of wax clinging to it. Her thumb brushed over the spot very gently, frowning down at it. "The best teacher isn't one who… who could hurt her student the way I have."

"It was an accident." With it only being a thin drop, she brushed it to one side. If any more had spilled onto her, that would be a much harder task to get rid of, but this wasn't the case at all. Ruby then looked back up to her, cheeks turning red as she bit her lip. "Besides… wax doesn't exactly hurt me."

"Thank goodness it doesn't." Winter's soft lips drifted so close to Ruby's hand that her shallow breath could be felt, warm on the slightly red spot where the wax had been a moment before. Then she looked up. "I… what am I doing? You don't want me to kiss it and make it better; I'm not your parent."

"You're not, no… but…" How could she keep this going and play into the role? It was proving rather challenging when she just kept imagining it as her previous teacher. But eventually she smiled up at her again. "You are my guardian while I'm in this building. And that means you can."

Unable to hold back any longer, Winter pressed her lips into Ruby's flesh. Once she did, she seemed unable to stop, kneading into it over and over, leaving tiny wet spots as she went. Her eyes closed, in bliss at being granted such an opportunity with her student… who began to smile again. All she could do was push her hand further into the kisses, offering her up more and more to play with. Oh, how she loved being pampered by her favourite teacher; something no other student would get. Despite the fact that the class size was exactly one.

When she finally drew away, Miss Schnee looked up at Ruby with heavy-lidded eyes. Licked her lips, swallowed. Then she whispered, "I… absolutely should not… have done that, Miss Rose."

"I didn't mind." And she didn't at all. Given that she was pushing the hand further toward her again, she more insisted it was kissed than anything. "I was enjoying it, a lot."

"No, no, this is a problem." The teacher stood, taking the photograph with her and staring at it as she strode to her desk, then turned around and gazed at Ruby fearfully. "You should never have seen this. And I should never have seen what's in your notebook. Some lines are… are not meant to be crossed."

"Maybe not, Ma’am." She would have kept to her desk, but when Winter was over there, backlit by the candles present on her desk, it was impossible to resist. Walking over and placing her art by the photo, she looked gradually toward her teacher again, blushing scarlet. "But now… it seems we're on the same page."

The teacher stared down at the desk at the two images, her fingertips running over the ink In the sketchbook. Then she whispered, "That doesn't make it right that… if I take advantage. You said it yourself: I am in charge of you. I should be telling you to go back to your seat right now."

But she wasn't. Instead, Winter stood there, breathing hard as she glanced at Ruby out of the corner of her eye, caressing the drawing as her other hand clutched the edge of her desk. Half closing her eyes, Ruby made her need for her teacher as obvious as she could. She made sure to stand close to her teacher, unbearably close; despite how much her breath was hitching up.

"But you don't want to," she began, looking straight into the icy blues of Winter's. "And maybe I… want to be taken advantage of."

There was a moment of indecision. In that moment, Ruby of course knew that they would progress; it was the point of their play, after all. But still, the acting was superb; Winter's face showed all the earmarks of an older woman, tortured by desiring a younger one.

"Nothing that happens ever leaves this room," she breathed, voice shaking. "Not the photograph, or the feelings in your notebook…" Her eyes raised again to bore into Ruby's. "Or the 'massager' that we both know you're not going to use on your neck. Or anything after."

She had forgotten about that little tidbit. Blushing again as she looked back, she seemed to be weighing the options of Winter's offer. No strings attached, no conditions; sounded perfect to her. If only things were so easy outside in reality. Nodding, she held the back of her hand out to her teacher again, offering it up to be kissed.

"Yes, Miss Schnee."

Then Winter smiled. It wasn't a kind smile, but it wasn't cruel, either. Somewhere in between. "Tell me about your feelings," she urged, voice still shaking but now with more than simple fear. There was excitement building, as well. "One page in a notebook tells so much… but not enough."

Hoo boy… That was the question, in and out of play. It would be extremely difficult for her to answer that one without giving too much of the game away, and would leave awkward questions when they were done. But maybe she could purge these feelings by feeding them into the role.

"It started at the beginning of the year, when you first taught me. When you told me there was no need to be scared; that I should just… go with the flow- with my art, I mean."

Both of Winter's hands raised, fingering the lapels of Ruby's jacket. Fondly, almost affectionately. Their bodies were much closer now, even though Winter had seemingly done nothing to make it worse. "That's when it started, with me being kind. Where did your mind go from there? What changed it from merely being grateful to a teacher to…" She gave Ruby's necktie a little tug. "Something else?"

Pulled in toward her even more, she swallowed nervously. That was a question she couldn't answer, in or out of character. Taking a small breath in, she shakily began, "I-I dunno… I-it just began, y'know? I don't know how…"

"I'm no one special; just an art teacher. There are dozens of boys - or girls - at this school worth developing a crush on. It had to have been one thing or another." Both hands slid further up, one caressing the side of Ruby's face while the other tousled her hair. "Something I did, or said…?"

"N-no… just… you being you." That was the honest truth at the end of it. Out of character, it really was her discovery of how Winter was as a person that caused her feelings. She was kind, thoughtful, underneath her rather hard outer shell. How could anyone not fall for her? Edging herself closer, Ruby was more or less ready to slide into her lap, still smiling nervously.

"Just me?" Winter's fingers hooked around the bridge of Ruby's glasses, drawing them off and setting them on one of the filing cabinets as she walked to erase the board. Then she lifted the chalk and drew Ruby's name in large, ornate cursive. "I… can relate."

"You can?" Still standing herself back, she watched Winter write her name beautifully, waiting for her to make the next move.

"Why do you think I lit candles? To warm us up? They barely give off any heat, at all." Winter turned, biting the corner of her lip for a moment before she said in a low, sultry voice, "I wanted to see you by candlelight. Even if this was the only way I ever could, it… I can only allow myself so much without tipping my hand."

"Then…" Stepping toward Winter, allowing her character a moment of confidence, she half closed her eyes, placing her hands onto Winter's shoulders as she held her closer, fluttering her lashes seductively. "Maybe you should tip your hand now…"

"Miss Rose…" Her hands slid around Ruby's waist, very naturally sitting there. As if they belonged. Then she whispered, "Why haven't I been able to get you out of my mind? Did… I really put that photo in your envelope by accident? Or did my subconscious hope for this?"

"It could be a little both. I know that… this is like a dream come true for me." Gradually, Ruby began to lean forward. Her eyes seemed to focus on one particular part of her; her lips. Slowly she was heading toward her goal, eyes closing all the more…

Until there was a call from the main room of the apartment. One jarringly familiar for the teacher. "Winter! Do you have a moment?"

They both froze solid. Winter looked at the door, listening hard - and hearing the sound of footsteps, she hissed, "Shit, it's my fa- I mean, the headmaster! There will be too many questions if you're seen here!" Pulling out her chair quickly, she whispered, "Hide under the desk!"

Not even asking twice, Ruby immediately did as she was told and ducked down under the desk, scooting herself right to the back so she would be out of sight from anyone coming in. That was her out of the way; what about the rest of the things that were laid out for their scene?!

Seemed there was no time to do anything about it. The door opened, and entering immediately was Winter's father. Thankfully, he was distracted by a tablet in his hands, on which he tapped through a few of the screens, until he looked up toward her. "Ah, there you are! I just needed to confer with you about these few appointments coming u-"

Then he paused, looking at the desks in front of Winter’s. Blinking in confusion for a moment, it seemed as though he was going to figure something was going on, until…

"Are we due for the interns today? I thought that was next week."

"O-oh, it is," she sighed, sinking down into her chair. She scooted it carefully forward until she felt her shins up against Ruby's chest and stopped, not wishing to squish her but also needing for her seat to look as natural as possible. "I mean, they are. Next week. But the desks got here early."

"Hm… very well, that's fair." Leaning against one of the desks, he brought up another list on the tablet, before giving her his full attention. "I've had a few calls from different talk shows; some for FNKI, some for Freezerburn. Anyway, you're better versed in some of the topics they want to talk about than I am, so I need your input before I book these."

Below the desk, Ruby was blushing again. From where she was, she got an excellent view of Winter from down below. As part of her outfit, she didn't wear any underwear, and was freshly shaven just for her – other than the landing strip. Already she could smell that Winter was aroused, and right in front of her.

"That sounds fine, sir," Winter sighed, legs shifting somewhat anxiously. No way was she forgetting about their invisible guest, either, but was doing her best to sound as if nothing out of the ordinary was going on. "If you could forward the dates to me, I'll consult my calendar. Or send them via instant message, if you would ever take the time to learn how to use it…"

"Hey, I've only just joined the twenty-first century learning how to use this thing." He turned the tablet in her direction for a moment, before looking back at it. "Can I go through some of these with you? I need your input on how appropriate these subjects are for your sister."

"Of course." But Winter wasn't budging. She couldn't take the risk that she would stand up and her father might walk around behind the desk, spotting Ruby much more easily. As surreptitiously as she could, she scooted the lesson plan book so that it mostly covered the photograph before she reached out for the tablet.

"Right. The first one is Lisa Lavender again. She's doing a marriage special and wanted Weiss and Yang on, but I have a feeling she's going to bring up the same 'so who's the father' if Fènleng comes up…"

Ruby had more or less zoned out from the conversation going on overhead. She was far too distracted by the sight and smell in front of her. Oh, how much she wanted to lean in, take another taste of it…

And she could; it seemed like something a student would do under these conditions. They weren't exactly playing by the rules here. Giving into her temptation, she placed her hands on Winter's inner thighs, beginning to stroke very slowly. Testing the waters.

"Well, it should be alright; Yang and Weiss are pretty good at redire-AH!" Clearing her throat, Winter adjusted herself in her seat slightly, trying to press her thighs together and trap the hands still. "R-redirecting questions by now. But we could have a word with Lavender before the show."

Alarmed by the sudden yelp from Winter, Mr Schnee raised an eyebrow. For now, he said nothing about it, and simply continued. "Right… well, that could be a possibility. Anyway, she wants FNKI possibly the week after, for both an interview and to perform; that I think would be fine. But I'm more worried about the other few shows on the list that want Freezerburn. I mean, I know they're pretty good with questions but I do worry sometimes on their behalf."

Unfortunately, Ruby wasn't stopping. She only began to smirk more, gradually pushing the legs apart a little more. She was determined to begin teasing as intimately as possible, to continue her habit of getting into risky situations. Wanting to give as good as she got for once.

Not that Winter was making it easy for her. The thighs were opening, but clearly she was pushing back against the hands forcing them apart. As she did so, she hitched a smile over her discomfort. "I know, Father. Weiss is still your baby girl, and Yang is an important part of our family, now, too."

"They are indeed. I just won't tolerate people attacking either of them and spreading rumours. Especially not while they're sensitive right now, I mean; you know what Weiss has been like since Fènleng was born, and the situation with Yang's mental health."

It didn't stop there. As well as hands, a soft pair of lips could be felt against her skin. Ruby was planting more and more kisses upward, giving a brief taster of what was to come. Which caused the scent to get stronger. Winter could only hope that her father didn't notice, but hopefully it would remain trapped beneath the skirt – or masked by the strawberry candle still burning on the second student desk.

"Y-yes, um… you know that I, of all people would never wish any further harm on Yang. But she's strong, she can handle a f- a few reporters."

"Yes… I hope so. I did say ‘no’ to the more infamous shows known to pressure their guests, thought that best. But if you could give a mark on the ones you think they'd enjoy, I'll be on my way."

The kissing continued upward still. Her hands instead moved to Winter's knees, holding them apart so she could continue that journey further upward, more and more until they finally hit home. And she pressed a soft kiss against Winter's petals.

At that instant, Winter had just been reaching up to grasp the tablet… when she couldn't help but let out a low moan, trembling from head to toe and accidentally knocking the apple from her desk as she braced herself against the sensation.

"Y… you can…" Clearing her throat, she sat back again and redoubled her concentration. "You can do as you see f-fit, Father."

Now it seemed he suspected something was wrong, and his brow furrowed again. "Is… everything alright? You seem awfully… on edge."

It could be more felt than heard, but Ruby giggled against Winter's flower at that comment. She could feel herself that Winter was on edge, especially when she delivered yet another kiss. When she saw fit, she allowed her tongue to press directly between her lips, giving a long lap over the length of her.

"S-sorry about that," Winter struggled to say, thighs pressing into both sides of Ruby's head, one of her heels digging into the girl's side. "Cramps, I… think I might have eaten… bad sushi…" She bit her lip to keep from calling out again, bracing herself as best she could.

Her student chose to ignore the mild pain. She continued to lap at the moist petals even more, loving every moment she could feel Winter reacting against her in some way. And all in front of her own father! This was as risky as it got; she was doing great! Winter would no doubt be so proud of her when they were alone again.

"I see. Well, I have some pain killers back in my apartment if you need them, I can go fetch them if needs b-"

But something else caught her father’s eye as he glanced toward her desk. Although she had managed to cover the photograph, Ruby's sketch wasn't covered at all. It was there, out in the open, forgotten by Winter. And was enough to raise both the man's eyebrows.

"Th-that won't be necessary," she told him, attempting to hold his attention away from the photograph. "I… I'll weather it, and if…"

A fresh wave of pleasure cut off the rest of her words. Seemed Ruby was actually not just aiming to tease her a little here or there, but to drive her all the way to orgasm! While Mr. Schnee was still standing on the other side of the desk! Had the Dom created a monster?

"Winter…" It didn't seem to work. Although his attention was away from the photo at the least, he was looking at her instead. There was silence for a moment, until he lightly smiled. "You… never told me that you were also into women."

And from below the desk, Ruby had to stop herself from suddenly laughing. Drawing herself away from the lips for a moment, she quietly chortled to herself, biting her own lip as tight as she could to prevent any sound escaping.

"What? Oh, that's… it's m-merely a drawing a f-friend did." Even though she was breathing easier now that her companion had taken a break, clearly she was still deeply affected by Ruby's attentions. "I… why should that mean I'm… you know, that?"

"Well… I can only assume, a picture of a naked woman – in this context, no less! You must have paid good money for a piece of art like that, and I can't think why you'd want it for general… aesthetic." He was finding himself becoming rather flustered at the subject. Mr Schnee had only just in recent years become more open to his family, including the extended family they now all shared. To his daughter, this would be a strange surprise to hear him talk about, or even see him blush because of the art. "I-I mean, nothing wrong with it, you know. Just… wow, I've been a bigoted old man all this time and both my girls are queer. What a twist."

Winter found herself completely in disbelief. Though she knew her father had come a long way since his old homophobic leanings, she hadn't expected him to very nearly not bat an eye at such an obviously perverse drawing lying out for anyone to see. Even if she had only forgotten about it and not meant for anyone to see it.

But there was something else about his blush that brought a question to mind. She didn't want to ask it, knew the answer would be nothing good. But try as she might, she couldn't resist.

"Do you… like that sketch?"

"I-it's… Uh…" Obviously from a drawing, he didn't recognise the figure; much to Winter's advantage. The last thing she wanted was to try and explain why there was a picture of herself bound and gagged on the desk. Still, he shrugged his shoulders, trying to nervously continue. "I-it's rather… interesting. I don't think you'd want to hear your old man admitting he likes that sort of thing."

"What do-" She hesitated, pushing her thighs together. If Ruby decided she was going to take advantage of the situation again, she wanted her to at least have to fight for it. "Perhaps I would never have asked if the topic hadn't come up this way, but now I'm curious. What do you like about it? The subject matter, the artist's skill… the model?"

And Ruby did. Even if her head was trapped between Winter's thighs, that wasn't going to stop her attempting to push back forward again. As best she could, once more she prised the legs apart, pushed her face to the petals beneath. She was determined not to let Winter off that easily.

And the ever-oblivious Papa Schnee could only look a little more, tilting his head. "Hmm… a-a mixture of the three. Though I haven’t ever seen anything quite like this, the art is very lovely. An interesting style."

"Isn't it, though?" Winter said, gasping as softly as she could when she felt Ruby's mouth attacking her anew, as she feared it would. "You'd… never believe who drew it. Quite a talent, even if it's… well, it's a little kinky, isn't it?"

However, during her brief respite from being eaten out, Winter had thought of a better plan for revenge. As she did her best to lean casually against her elbow, gazing down at the risque art, she raised her feet up and dug the pointed heels down into both of Ruby's hips.

A muffled yelp could be felt against Winter's sex. It hurt, but not to the point she had to stop. Just enough to prove again that she was doing a good job of inflaming her desires.

And further adding to the bonfire were the words of her own father, who could only give a nod of approval. "Yes. If you could give me the details, I may even attempt to commission them, maybe. Though… probably not something as kinky as this! Something more... tasteful, suitable for framing."

Winter nodded, using the time to let another wave of pleasure pass through her, into every last nerve ending. She couldn't stand it. If Ruby didn't let up, or if she didn't get rid of her father within the next few minutes… something unthinkable was going to happen. But she couldn't concentrate. Normally, she would know exactly what to say to get rid of him, or to make him lose interest in the conversation. But all she could do in that moment was to respond.

"I think that… could be arranged. I'll se- I'll set it up. One of the same model? Not kinky, but it could be… anything you want… name it…" Toward the end, her mind had drifted down under the desk again, as ashamed as she was of that.

But once realising what she had said, her heart stopped. No. She couldn’t pose nude for a sketch that her father would be buying – there was a line, and that was definitely over it!

"I may have a model in mind, perhaps… we shall see yet. Though I’ll keep her in mind, as well, of course; she's clearly a beautiful woman indeed. Reminds me of your moth- well, you won't want to hear about that." Thankfully, he did seem to be wrapping up the conversation. That much was obvious when he took the tablet back from her.

What a relief – in more ways than one. Although he did still spend a moment looking at the edits Winter had made to the list. Giving enough time for Ruby to continue. Rather than just lapping at the length of it, she began to focus directly on the clit. Giving a firm circle around and around, she smirked to herself when she felt Winter's legs shuddering. She was close.

The word "Shit!" fell from Winter's lips, soft and stressed. But even before her father could ask, she smiled up at him as convincingly as she could. "Oh, n-nothing, I just… knew the artist is f-fond of that model. Who d-did you have in mind?"

Ruby's mouth was magical! Every lick and nibble at her clit was making her skin tingle all over, her stomach clench and her heart race. A little further and she would be over the edge. The woman hated it, and yet she couldn't stop now; if she tried to get rid of her father at that exact second, whatever story she told him, she knew that one way or another, she would most likely have to stand up – and that when she tried she wouldn't be able to. Those knees were going to buckle. It seemed her only option was to bear down and weather the approaching climax.

Giving a small nod at the tablet, he finally tucked it under his arm. Business taken care of, he refocused on her question. "No one you'll know, I'm afraid. That's… more a conversation for another time, I think."

With a final grin to herself, Ruby went in for the kill. With a few more circles around the clit, she allowed one of her hands to head forward, drifting around her entrance that little bit to tease her. And once feeling the heels stab in a little more, she finally let them enter inside, trying to curl to hit that spot – as a vague revenge for the pain.

Both of Winter's eyes flew wide, her mouth falling open. Even throughout all of the teasing, the segue into earnest cunnilingus, she had never expected for Ruby to finger her! In front of her father! It was all she could do not to call out in ecstasy, to keep her reaction to a mere few breathy sighs despite the grinding through her inner walls. She had been so wet and ready, worked up to receive this pleasure. If they were alone, she would have been rejoicing as vocally as possible; she still wanted to.

But they weren't alone. Looking up at her father, she took a deep breath so as to sound as firm as she could manage. She was too close to wait for him to leave now. She had to ask him something that would keep him talking while she let her end come to the surface. "Ohh, Daddy…." That was NOT good; she tried again. "Y-you can tell me anything. Maybe I would… l-like to see the model's other work before I p-pass it along to my artist."

"Well… she's not a model." Thankfully, he was continuing. It was probably the worst kind of subject to have whilst in the middle of these activities, but it kept him talking. And easily distracted. "Of course, your mother's been gone a fair while… and though I still miss her, very much so, I know she wouldn't want me to be lonely the rest of my life. It's only been recently that I've found the strength to begin searching again. And, well, I've met someone new."

While her father was talking, Ruby was simply intensifying her efforts. It was now or never! She had to do it while he was distracted enough to look away or else Winter would never forgive her.

"O-ohhhhh?" Winter just managed to turn the end of her moan upward so it sounded like a question. It was too late to turn back. Widening her thighs to give Ruby headway, she forced herself to keep it together long enough to ask, "Do you… have a… picture of this new… lady in your life? I'd lo-LOOOOVE to see."

Eyes widening in surprise at Winter's apparent enthusiasm, he blinked back at her, taking the tablet back from under his arm. "You… really don't mind? I mean, I was worried that you or Weiss would be angry at me, or uncomfortable with- this is quite fantastic!"

He seemed to have not noticed Winter's predicament at all. Somehow, Ruby's continued actions on her clit and inside against her spot were going unnoticed by him still, and Winter still wasn't there yet! Probably because him being there made her too nervous. Thrusting faster and faster, she tried to make sure she would be ready to finish her off at the perfect moment…

Which came when Mr Schnee began to scroll through his tablet again, rolling his eyes and groaning to himself. "Where is that blasted Facebook app?! I only just had it open!"

That was the moment, alright. Gripping one arm of her chair to tether herself, Winter stopped resisting, stopped holding herself away from Ruby's punishing fingers as her inner walls clamped down around them, moisture pushing outward as she came. Wave after wave of ecstasy flooded out from the two points of Ruby's mouth on her greedy clit and the fingers hitting her internal spot, down into her shoes and up into every hair follicle on her head. There could be no denying how phenomenal of an orgasm it was.

But it had consequences. They could have been worse, or more prominent, but she had heard herself moan Ruby's name in an undertone during one of the early aftershocks. Even if her father hadn't heard it, she also felt wetness running down her inner thigh, and down her chin from her open mouth. As sensitive as they were rubbing up against the lace, she found herself eminently glad that she had worn a bra so that her rock-hard nipples wouldn't show through her linen shirt; that would have been too obvious to ignore.

Finally, Ruby could be felt backing herself away. She had Winter's liquid splashed on her face, in her hair; a clear marking of what she had just done. Something her student was going to wear with pride when this was all over, and she gradually drew her fingers out to finally stop the teasing.

Meanwhile, Mr Schnee had at last brought forward a page belonging to a Latina woman with shoulder length brown hair, one who seemed a similar age to him, give or take a few years. "Yes, here she is. You might have seen her in the building a couple of times."

"She looks ni-iiiice," Winter let out with a shiver as she was exited, her neck twitching slightly. The drool rolled even further down her chin, but she couldn't quite force herself to raise a hand and wipe it away just yet. "Is… was she the representative from the… from our paper supplier? She's hot."

Inwardly, she cringed. That had not been quite what she meant to say! It was true, but she had intended to be more moderate about it!

"Why, yes, she is! She's actually been helping me a lot when I have bad days grappling with my loneliness; it took me far too long to realise I’m attracted to the woman, however." Although straight after the comment of her being “hot”, he pulled the tablet slowly back again, teasing. "Hey, hands off, you."

Smiling weakly, his daughter finally leaned against her hand in such a way that she could surreptitiously wipe the drool track away. "Very funny. But I am happy for you."

Even in the midst of such a strange moment, Winter realized that was true; her father had found someone to help ease his lingering grief. It was a lucky thing indeed, as she had noticed how bad it was getting over the years. Maybe the relationship would last and she could become part of their odd little family.

"Thank you, my dear. And… I hope, if I was right about earlier, that you're happy. That's all I care about. And if you do happen to find someone, man or woman, I'd like to meet them."

"That may never happen, Father. But… I promise you will if it does." Then she shuffled some papers, purely so she would seem too busy to walk him out, before she said, "Oh, and please send me a few pictures of your new lady friend; I'll forward them on to my artist, see if she would be interested in working with her."

"Shall do." Finally he was going to make a move to leave, drawing the tablet back fully and pacing back toward the door again, not before leaving one last quick remark about the drawing. "Though this model truly is attractive… if I wasn’t already working up the nerve with Amber, I might ask for her number."

And with that, he finally closed the door behind him, and could be heard doing the same to the main door as well. Leaving poor Winter with the knowledge that her father clearly still was head over heels for their mother… even if that knowledge took the form of knowing she would do in a pinch.

[purplesurveys]

1096

survey by doedear

When you get an account for something, what's the first username you try? It depends on what I’m signing up for. For social media and informal sites I use the same username I’ve been using for like a decade now just because it makes it easier for me to remember; for more professional websites I use my first name, my middle initial, and my surname. 

What do you think might be someone else's first impression of you? The most common impression is quiet and aloof, which I’m honestly fine with.

Is texting having a negative or a positive effect for social relationships? I appreciate that it makes staying connected with my loved ones a lot easier, but I disagree with how it’ll sometimes be used to deal with situations that are ideally handled by person, like breakups or serious arguments. In other words it can definitely have both; it depends on how it’s used.

Would you be okay with a friend wanting to date one of your exes? I might have a personal problem with it, but it’s not like I would do anything to prevent it from happening. I would not be in the place to do so. I will probably distance myself from that friend though, just so that I don’t have to get updated on what’s going on between them.

Have you ever been addicted to something other than a drug? No.

Have you ever been addicted to a drug? Nope.

Do you like macadamia nut cookies? Sure, though I really ever only eat one kind; Starbucks has a dark chocolate macadamia cookie that I like to get from time to time.

What kind of accent do people typically have where you're from? Philippine English, which I’d say sounds a bit similar to American English, excep for the small differences here and there  of our differences in pronunciation.

Bruno Mars - fail or win? He’s a win for me. When it comes to Top 40/pop music, he has always been one of my honest favorites. Have kind of a crush on him too lol, so there’s that.

Can you sleep without a fan on? During this time of the year, yes. It doesn’t last that long since Philippines was never meant to be a cold country, though.

Does history interest you at all? It really does; I can watch, read, and go to museums about it all day if I could. It was also my favorite class and it was the subject I could rely on to have good grades in and pull my average up, hahaha.

What's something you wish you could do-over? As much as possible I don’t really think of this as I don’t see the point in focusing on situations that are already done and over with. But if I had no choice, I’d pick the time I was a college freshman and make myself less-breakdown-y and less-depression-y.

How many times a day do you apply deoderant? Once, at the start of the day.

Have you ever tried any drugs? Other than caffeine, no.

What caused the most intense physical pain you've ever felt? The time I accidentally ripped my earring off and permanently disfigured my piercing. Also, when I touched a plugged-in clothing iron thinking it wouldn’t be hot enough.

Do you like those Sperry Top-Sider shoes? They’re actually pleasant to look at, yes. I’d buy a pair for myself.

Can you wear shoes like that without getting blisters on your ankles? When I’ve worn them like 5 times already, yeah. I always get blisters with newly-bought pairs, though.

Would you agree that dark chocolate tastes like rotten chocolate? Uh, no? That’s some poorly-made dark chocolate you have. 

Do you touch your lips when you're nervous? I have other habits.

Do you think you can read other people's body language well? Yeah. This is on surveys a lot...

Are you a good driver? I’mmmmmm honestly a little reckless because my temper is shortest when on the road lol. But since I’ve driven the longest out of all my friends and have grown used to parking in tricky spots, changing lanes, overtaking, etc., they all still prefer to ride with me.

Did you pass your driver's test the first time you took it? Yes. I think he passed me out of sympathy though (because I did terrible and we both knew it), because failing me would’ve taken so much more time on my end and theirs. And in the Philippines, getting things over with matters more than quality control haha.

Would you rather be involved in a watergun or a paintball gun war? At this point maybe a paintball gun war, since I’ve been to many water gun fights before.

Is your hair in layers or is it all the same length? It’s the same length. I haven’t had it layered since the 5th grade.

Is there anyone who you're afraid to be in a car with, if they're driving? A friend who’s new to driving, like Jo or Angela.

What's a quick fix for a bad hair day? I just dab my hair with some water at the sink; it’s usually able to do the trick and make me look prepared when I’m unable to take a full shower.

Do you enjoy flying or do you get scared? The idea of accidents and crashes scare me, of course, but I try not to let it ruin my experience of flying and traveling.

Be honest. Do you like making other people feel jealous? Sometimes but it has waned more as I’ve gotten older. It has just started to mean less and less through the years and as my priorities change.

Have you ever purposely made someone of the opposite sex jealous? No. When it came to Mike, I didn’t really flaunt my relationship since I felt bad for him.

Are you addicted to shopping? Nope, but I can definitely see myself being if I ever decide to make it a weekly habit.

Do you always wear mascara and eyeliner? I never wear either.

Do you have any huge hoodies lined with snuggly fur on the inside? No, and I can tell you that is uncommon to see here because that sounds insanely warm to wear.

Is there anything you do, kind of habitually, that's completely mindless but helps you think? I don’t think so. I’m not sure I understood the question, either...

Do you like headphones or ear-buds more? Earbuds. Headphones undeniably have better quality, but they’re bulky.

What's your favorite winter sport? I don’t watch or play any.

What's something you're very good at? Meeting deadlines. I never miss one.

Where do you spend the majority of your summer? At home? ...Where else am I supposed to spend it in? Haha.

Who do you usually spend the most of your summer with? My family. I don’t have any yearly practices set every summer.

How old were you and where did you go on your first real date? I was 16; it was a quaint, Italian-American restaurant in Greenbelt.

Have you ever had a bonfire on the beach at night? I don’t think so. I would love that experience.

Do you like sour gummy worms? Yeah. I like the more gelatinous kind than the gummy candies with sour powder on them, though.

Have you ever helped a complete stranger with anything? I’m sure I have, but nothing super specific is coming to mind at the moment...just little things like holding the door open for someone carrying a heavy bag, cleaning up the plates and utensils on my table so that the server won’t have to do much work, teaching a stranger the COVID safety protocols before entering an establishment if they look confused, etc.

Would you pick up a hitchhiker if they seemed harmless? Probably not.

When playing a sport, are you more focused on winning or having fun? Winning, which I know doesn’t make me the best person to play with so I prefer to watch by the sidelines anyway. I do have fun playing table tennis though :)

Who's the last person who gave you a piggy back ride? Gabie.

Who's the last person that you gave a piggy back ride? I’m lighter than everyone else I know so I’ve never given one.

Rock, paper, or scissors? I switch it up every time.

Would you be bothered if your boyfriend liked to bite you? No. I liked lightly biting my ex as a show of affection and just to get her attention whenever I wanted to be playful.

Are you any good at dancing? No. I’m good at memorizing routines, but could never do them on my own.

Even if you aren't, do you like to dance? Only by myself.

What makes you feel the most 'alive'? New places and new experiences.

Whose conversations do you appreciate the most? Angela and Hans.

Is there anyone's advice you value enough to take against your own judgment? Gabie. At least in the past.

How often do you get the opportunity to be completely alone? Very seldom, which is why I try to give it to myself every weekend as a reward.

Do you like being alone or does it drive you crazy? I appreciate if I’ve been around people for too long, but I also shouldn’t have too much of it.

Do you have a trampoline? No.

Do you get nervous when driving in convertibles, knowing that if you flipped, you'd be screwed? I’ve never had this concern because I’ve never driven in one.

What's your favorite Pixar movie? Toy Story, of course.

Are you capable of successfully lying to someone you love? I guess, but I’ll hate doing it.

Who do you adore? Angela’s mom.

[horrorslashergirl]

Chromeskull becoming infatuated with the reader so he stalks her and leaves special gifts on her doorsteps. 😊

Your girl here has a habit of getting writing ideas when buying lace lingerie and high brand perfume. Yes, because I bask into a little luxury...and Chromeskull.

Here you have a piece of some big-bad-killer-skull-daddy .

Chromeskull x Reader- Dating tips from Chromeskull

You attracted weirdos, that was your own opinion about yourself and you had a huge list of examples to attest to this said theory.

First, it was a guy in high-school who used to have a stash of playboy magazines. Nothing weird, only that he used to keep it in his backpack all the time with him. You even heard he masturbated in the school toilet. Gross. Just no.

Then there was a guy named Darwin that gave you love letters, only said love letters were always theories about how you resembled cartoon characters, not to mention the guy had a habit of spitting all the time when he talked.

Last, now in college, a pervert who always smelled of cheese and was a vegan. No, you weren't judgemental, but he always eats with his hands and tried to show his theories about eating meat is evil down your throat. You had enough to say the last.

Dating has never been your top game and being in college, you hoped you would find a decent guy, but your expectations weren't meet. Guys who were decent enough always scrambled away once they found out you weren't a dizzy bimbo who only giggled at every comment they made.

This is how you ended up on a Friday night at home, drinking some wine and watching serial killers documentaries, while your classmates were probably at a party, snorting cocaine and fucking into dirty bathroom stalls.

Yeah...Not exactly something you would look forward too.

Now, you weren't a prude, but giving head to a guy in a place that had probably STD all over the walls wasn't exactly appealing to say the last.

If only you could find a decent guy that would, at last, have the decency to wash before going on a date and who wouldn't choke on his own spit when laughing.

You were ready to get yourself a refill of wine when your doorbell rang, making you furrow your brows in confusion.

You sure weren't expecting anyone, but knowing some of your friends they sure would stumble to your house when drunk because they couldn't find their cellphones or keys.

Putting on your fluffy bunny slippers, you marched up to the front door and looked through the hole to see who it was. You learned from murderous documentaries that you shouldn't open the door at night if you don't know who it is.

None.

So, you opened it, looking from left to right to see if you could spot anyone, but no such luck. Probably some children messing around.

You were ready to close the door when your eyes looked down to see a white envelope on the welcome matt. Crouching down you grasped it and looked one more time left to right, hoping to spot the person who left it.

The silence of the night and chilly September night made you shiver a little, so you moved back inside to the couch and opened the envelope to see it was a letter, so you started reading it:

My dear little piggy,

Ever since the first time I meet you, I must say I always wondered how you would look in red, dripping down your body, your kissable lips into an 'o' shape, your nails dragging down my back as your flesh envelopes my knife.

Aren't you scared, so alone?

Your eyes widened at the twisted words on the white sheet, and the fact that the only sign at the bottom of the letter was a scribbled skull made it all the more unnerving.

That's the moment when you felt like you were being watched, your paranoid mind making you feel anxious.

If only you looked out the window you would see the ominous and out of the scenario black Bentley on the other side of the road.

In the past three months, things haven't been any decreasing either, because from twisted letters it all went to gifts if you could even call them that. Yes, they were gifts, but what made them unsettling was how the coincidence went.

You went out shopping one day and saw your favorite perfume, but didn't have the money to buy it. Imagine the surprise that after two days a velvet pink box sat in front of your door with the expensive perfume.

Then one time you saw a beautiful dress from Chanel that you were oh so tempted to buy, but rent and food were more important, then later that night you received it and it was your size. That was just disturbing.

This continued for months and from anxious to went to curious and intrigued. It was insane, but none in your life put so much thought in spoiling you, despite not knowing who this person is.

To put it simply you were basked into luxurious gifts and cards for shopping.

You felt special.

-----------------------------

It came to no surprise that Chromeskull was always chasing piggies, but this time it was you that he was chasing after; not the usual slaughtering piggy way, but more like spoiling a little kitten who was you.

It was pretty comic to see a 40-year-old man chasing after a girl that has half his age, but what can you say? Jesse has always liked them young and fresh, no wonder he gave off big-bad-killer-daddy vibes.

He loved to see your appreciation for his gifts and attention towards you, despite it not being direct, but his self-consciousness after he lost his face made it almost impossible to get woman willingly.

Paying piggies to suck him off didn't count.

He wanted someone who was willing to go full length into a relationship with him, someone who he could have a good time, from conversations to mind-blowing sex.

That's why he chose you.

It all started with an unpredictable meeting.

Yes, you have meet Jesse, but you didn't know it.

How?

You were shopping and because you were in such a hurry to catch the bus, you run into him while you looked down at your phone, your head meeting his chest.

The way you looked up at him at that time almost made him want to stop you. Your wide eyes, not of fear or disgust, maybe it was surprising because he knew very well how a displeased face looks like, your pouty lips and slightly pink cheeks of embarrassment were so appealing.

"I-I'm so sorry, sir!"

That was the only thing you said before sprinting away and that was also the moment when he knew he wanted you and what Jesse Cromeans wants, he gets.

In the past months, he made sure you weren't lacking in anything and he was even more so pleased when you accepted all the gifts, seeing you wear the clothes he gave you made him feel like he owned you.

Normally, Jesse was the ever so most confident person you could meet, but now he felt like his shy teenage self, looking at you from a few feet away as you were grocery shopping.

He wanted to approach you. Badly, but how could he? His face and his muteness didn't help.

You were at the liquor part, looking over bottles with furrowed brows, not knowing what to get, until a pale hand gripped a bottle of expensive scotch from the top shelf, the forearms fully tattooed.

You looked behind you to see a tall and bald man, dressed in all black, the fully tattooed forearms been on display from how his sleeves were rolled up.

'This one is the finest scotch from here if you want to drink something more refined.' an electronic voice spoke from his phone that he held in the other hand.

You were to say so surprisedly by this man's approach.

"Oh...You're mute? I know ASL, so there's no need to type on the phone if it's easier for you." you quickly said, making the man grin.

Did you know ASL? How could he miss that? You were full of surprises.

'That's good. I hate to use the electronic reader all the time.' he signed, his grin never leaving his scarred lips.

'I'm Jesse.' he signed and you introduced yourself, shaking his bigger hand.

"I would love to try this scotch, but donating my kidney for glass doesn't sound too appealing." you said with a dry chuckle.

Dark sense of humor. Good. Check.

'How about I buy it and you go out on a date with me? Sounds like a deal?' he signed and you arched an eyebrow, a lop-sided smile on your face.

That was the moment Jesse felt nervous, despite not showing. He could already imagine you laughing at him, for thinking that a cute girl like you would go out with someone like him.

"Sure."

What? His brown eye widened a little and you giggled at his shocked expression.

"You don't have to buy me a 2,500$ bottle of scotch to go on a date with me." you said, making him silently chuckle.

'Do you want a ride?' he asked, signing and you grinned, nodding.

----------------------------

Yes, that was the start of an interesting relationship. At first, it had ups and downs because of the age-gap and the hateful comments, that made Jesse want to murder all the people that even dared to question his relationship with you.

Imagine the surprise when one time you punched one guy for calling Jesse 'old-sugar-daddy' and you 'nasty-gold-digger'.

That was another aspect of you that he learned that you had and started to love it a lot; you were a feisty little thing and protective of him.

You always took care of his ego, assuring him that he was perfect just how he is and it made Jesse's heart swell with things he almost forgot existed.

To put it simply, you completed each other....In all ways.

-------------------------

Your hair was splayed in a mess on the black silk pillows, one hand fisting the bedsheets and the other rubbing the bald scalp of your lover who had your red lace panties pulled aside and his tongue wiggling inside your heat, making your toes curl.

"Fuck.......Jesse......I-If you don't stop...I-I'm gonna squirt." you breathed out, chest heaving and nipples hard from all the pleasure that was jolting up your spine.

The man between your legs stopped, giving your clit a flick with his tongue, his body moving up on top of you, scarred lips meeting plush ones, kissing with you such vigor you sometimes couldn't keep up.

He broke the kiss, looking down at you, so perfect on his bed.

'I'm going to wreck your world.' he signed with a dark smirk and you couldn't help but smile, your hand coming to cup his cheek, your thumb brushing over his scars.

"Please do, Chromeskull." you whispered, looking up at him from under your eyelashes.

Jesse grinned, pulling you into another passionate kiss, taking your breath away.

[smuttyassholes]

Home - Gikwang

Request: Can you do Lee Gikwang, where he hasn’t seen his gf in a month because of a tour. I know there aren’t a lot (if not any) smuts with him in them.

A/n: Can y’all tell I want this man to wreck me? Cause ever since Don’t Close Your Eyes came out, I’ve been haunted with his bitchass in that black suit just begging to get the succ of his life. - #4

“One more day.” You sighed to yourself as you crossed a red dash over the small calendar that stood on your nightstand.

One more day till it marked a month.

One more day till he came home.

You couldn’t completely complain though, knowing full well what dating Gikwang involved. Hell, you met him at a damn fan-meet.

But you were lonely. The house was too quiet without how he sang to himself or hummed while walking about. The bed was too empty without his imprint in the sheets, and not to mention cold.

Oh, how cold the past nights were. You even bought another blanket to make up for the lack of body heat.

There were some upsides to his absence, though. Like eating a single cookie for breakfast without getting scolded, or how you didn’t really have to cook anymore, surviving off of takeout (which he was never gonna know about).

Though you had your fun, you were still lonely. Sure, being able to do whatever was nice, but at what cost?

All you wanted was your boyfriend back.

-

You’re not sure when you fell asleep, the last thing you remembered was watching some rerun of an older show while you laid in one of Gikwang’s hoodie.

Nonetheless, you turned the TV off and threw the blanket back before rolling over and crossing a red dash across the current day with a smile.

Today was the day.

With that same smile, you grabbed another one of his hoodies, along with two towels and some underwear and headed to the shower.

You had nothing to do today, so what was the point it wearing real clothes? You were most likely just gonna lounge around and wait until he got home.

After showering, you moved the curtain back and reached for the towel, wrapping it around your body before wrapping your hair.

As you stepped out, you moved towards the sink to brush your teeth thinking of what to make for dinner since you knew he wouldn’t want takeout.

After finishing, you unwrapped the towel, tossing it into the hamper before putting on your underwear on and shaking the towel off of your hair, making sure to get all the excess water out before tossing that towel into the hamper, as well before settling on throwing your hair into a ponytail.

As you made your way back to your room, you decided to make the bed. Nothing fancy, but definitely not leaving it to look like how you left it when you got up.

By the time you finished, you still couldn’t think of a dinner idea, and you stuck your lip out with a pout.

Would he even be home at dinner time? Would he be back later? Would he be too tired to eat? What if he came home earlier?

You groaned in frustration at how he never told you what time he’d be back, and settled on the fact that he’d probably tell you what he wanted once he was home.

But the thought of him being back early had you shooting off the bed and running towards the living room, trying to clean up any signs of your messy habits, starting in the kitchen.

You grimaced as you saw the empty take out boxes in the trashcan and nearly face palmed. You were supposed to take that out last night.

With a sigh, you started cleaning, making sure nothing was left. No dirty dishes, no stains, no smells, no messes.

While you were on your little cleaning spree, you figured you might as well clean everything else, starting with cleaning out the fridge, then moving to the cabinets, getting rid of anything old, or things you just weren’t gonna eat.

When you had finished, you flopped onto the couch, and placed your phone on the coffee table while you turned the TV on, settling on whatever was on.

-

“Baby.” You heard someone whisper, a warm touch on your shoulder lightly shaking you. “Baby, wake up.” You heard the voice chuckle.

“Since when do dream people laugh?” You mumbled, turning over and putting your hand under your head, the hoodie riding up and exposing your underwear covered ass.

“This isn’t a dream.” The voice laughed, placing a playful smack on your ass.

“How can dream people deny their existence?” You mumbled again as you moved your hips. “Only one person would spank me and he-”

Your eyes shot open at the realization and you rolled over.

“It’s really you.” You whispered, getting up and throwing your arms over him.

“God, you take so long to wake up.” He mumbled, wrapping his arms around your waist. “I’ve been here for ten minutes already.” He laughed as he picked you up, your legs immediately wrapping around his waist.

“I missed you so much.” You whispered into his neck.

“Yeah, can you like, not breath on my neck.” He chuckled, moving the both of you to the kitchen so he could sit you on the counter. “Not having anything for a month makes a person kinda sensitive.” He laughed as he turned towards the fridge.

“Tell me about it.” You mumbled, your feet swaying as you watched him. “So how was it?” You piped up, your head moving around to see what he was grabbing.

“Pretty good.” Was all he said, turning back around with some eggs and vegetables, setting them on the counter next to you. “Would’ve been better if you were with me.” He smiled, moving towards the cabinets and pulling out some packets of ramen.

“Of all the dishes I racked my brain for, I not once thought of ramen pancake.” You shook your head, watching as he brought out a pot.

“Good.” He smiled as he filled it with water. “That means I get to cook tonight.”

“Ton-” You started but stopped. “What time is it?” You furrowed your brows.

“Close to nine.” He smiled, placing the pot on the stove and breaking the noddles before dropping them in. “Why, did you sleep the day away?”

“No.” You glared. “I cleaned all day. I guess I fell asleep around five-ish? Six-ish?” You questioned.

“Did it take you so long to clean cause you’re secretly a pig?” He raised a brow, grabbing a bowl and placing it next to you.

“If I said yes, would you be less attracted to me?” You raised your own brow.

“No, but instead of ‘kitten’, I can call you ‘piggy’.” He joked, earning a smack on the arm. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry.” He laughed. “But if you weren’t so kinky, I wouldn’t have anything to use against you.” He pointed out as he started cracking the eggs.

“You weren’t complaining about my kinks when I called you ‘daddy’.” You smirked. “Or ‘sir’.” Your smirk grew as he cracked one of the eggs a little harder.

“Remember what I said about sensitive?” His tongue poking the inside of his cheek as he reached for the vegetables. “You’re on thin ice, princess.”

“Ohh, Mr. Gikwang threatening me with chives-”

You were cut off with a gasp as his hand gripped your chin tightly.

“I get home after a month to my girlfriend dressed in nothing but my hoodie and thin ass panties.” He growled. “The last thing I need is your bratty little attitude.” He warned before loosening his grip. “So are you gonna behave?” He raised a brow and you nodded, earning a kiss to the forehead. “Good girl.”

You stayed quiet as you watched him continue to cook, the ache between your thighs growing the longer it took, but you didn’t dare speak up. The last thing you needed was for him to snap and end up burning the house down due to ignoring the stove.

When he was finished, he cut it in half, putting it on one plate, and grabbing a fork before making his way back to you.

“Ah.” He motioned you to open your mouth as he brought up a piece of food, holding it in front of your lips.

You opened your mouth and accepted the food, chewing happily as you hadn’t eaten the whole day, him doing the same.

If anything, his duality made you even more frustrated. How could he switch from being dominant to domestic so easily?

“How frustrated are you that all it took was some attitude.” You asked, testing the waters.

“You’ll find out later if you keep it up, princess.” His tone flat as he placed the fork in his mouth.

“Maybe I wanna find out.” You mumbled shy.

“What? You don’t want any sweet-lovey-dovey sex for my first night back?” He raised a brow in amusement as he placed the plate aside.

“Maybe..” You trailed off as you bit your lip. “You weren’t the only one who’s frustrated.”

He smirked, placing his hands on either side of you and leaning in, kissing you softly.

Your legs parted to make room for him as your hands came up to grip his face, pulling him closer to deepen the kiss.

He wasted no time closing the space between you, his hands slowly moving from the counter top to travel up your thighs before finding purchase on your hips, his fingers giving them a light squeeze.

“God, I missed this.” He groaned as he pulled away, hastily trailing kisses down your jaw while his hands slipped under the hoodie, snaking their way up to cup your breasts.

You said nothing, only biting your lip as your back arched into his touch, your hand flying to grab his hair as he sucked at the skin on the juncture of your neck and shoulder, your hips wiggling forward so you could get even closer.

“How much I’ve thought about coming home and just ruining you.” He mumbled, pulling away from you.

But before you could complain, his hands went to the hem of the hoodie, quickly lifting it up and over your head and dropping it on the floor before his hands removed his own shirt, smirking at how you licked your lips at the sight of him.

“I guess you missed me, too.” He chuckled, watching as your hand came out to run along his torso before moving back and pulling you into him, his bulge pressing deliciously against you.

“Part of me wanted to make love tonight.” He whispered, his fingers playing with the hem of your panties. “Show you how much I missed you.” He continued, his finger dipping down to press against your clothed clit, reveling in the damp feeling. “But I really don’t feel like taking my time.” He pressed harder, hooded eyes looking up to watch your head lean back. “Do you?”

You quickly shook your head, your hips pushing into his finger while your hand reached out to wrap around his hips, trying to pull him impossibly closer.

“So you want it right here?” His tone smug as he cocked a brow. “Right here on the counter?” He asked, using the hand that was on your hip to pull you into his bulge. “Right next to the food we didn’t even finish?” He asked, repeating the action as you nodded your head rapidly. “Such a dirty girl.” He smiled, pulling away from you yet again, chuckling as you whined.

“Lay back for me, baby.” He licked his lips.

You wasted no time doing so, hissing lightly as the cold tile made contact with your skin.

But the cold feeling didn’t last long as his hands trailed up your thighs, gripping the sides of your panties and pulling them down quickly, letting them fall next to the hoodie.

“Fuck, I missed this view.” He groaned, his hands back on your thighs as he pressed soft kisses from the top of your knee to your inner thigh, one of your hands coming up to grope yourself while the other went to his hair, gripping tight in anticipation.

“Touching yourself before I’ve barely done anything.” He tsked, his eyes looking up to watch as you pinched your nipple, rolling the small bud between your fingers. “So needy.” He said, kissing right above your clit. “And all for me.” He whispered before his mouth was finally on you, his tongue lapping at you while his hands spread your thighs so he could get even deeper.

The hand you already had in his hair was torn between tugging him away from you, and tugging him closer, too overcome with pleasure to think about what you wanted, your thighs trying to close around him despite his hold on them.

“Gi-Gikwang.” You gasped out, your hips grinding against his face. “M-More, please.” You whined.

He didn’t hesitate to oblige, his hand moving from your thigh, to tease your entrance with two fingers, smirking against you as you begged him to stop teasing.

And he did, pushing them inside you and pumping them quickly while his mouth moved to focus on your clit, lips wrapping around it and sucking harshly.

“Oh, fuck.” You moaned out, your back arching off the counter as your grip in his hair tightened, the pressure in your stomach building. “Shit, I’m go-” You were cut off with a cry as he pulled away completely, staring down at your panting form with hungry eyes.

With no explanation, he only tugged at his pants and boxers, not even bothering to step out of them before he slid his tip in with a groan.

“God, you’re so tight.” He groaned, his head falling back, taking a moment for himself after he bottomed out, the way you squeezed around him too overwhelming.

“Move.” Your whine brought him out of his thoughts, and his hips started up, wasting no time building up a pace and starting off brutal, his hand grabbing your legs and spreading them, the new angle causing louder moans to leave your lips, your hands falling to the side, searching for something to grab.

“God, you feel so good.” He grunted, watching as your breasts bounced. “I might just fuck you all night.” He licked his lips, his thrusts getting rougher while his hands dropped to grab your thighs, bringing you back to meet his thrusts roughly.

“Please.” You moaned out. “I never wanna forget how good you feel.” You whimpered, your hands moving to grab his wrists. “The toys just aren’t enough.” You admitted, your eyes opening at the realization of what you just said.

“So you cheated?” He cocked a brow, his hips slowing down. “I thought we agreed on no toys while I’m gone?” His hips now doing one harsh thrust to emphasize his words.

“I-I-” You started, but the way his eyes glared down at you shut you up.

“Did you,” He started, keeping up the one harsh thrust as he spoke. “Use toys,” Another thrust. “When we,” Another thrust. “Agreed,” Another thrust. “Not to?” Another thrust.

You only nodded, too scared how your voice would sound.

“Which one?” He asked, hips stilling entirely, ignoring your cry of protest. “Or were you so needy you used more than one?” He scoffed lightly, watching as you swallowed thickly.

“The vibrator..” You trailed off in a whisper. “And the dildo..” You closed your eyes before continuing. “And the plug.”

His eyes lit up at the last part, the thought of you with the jeweled plug he bought you making him groan.

“And you didn’t even send anything?” He smirked playfully, rolling his hips.

“I didn’t wanna get in trouble.” You whined.

“But you’re in trouble now.” He raised a brow, rolling his hips again. “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t pull out and get you off on those toys instead.” He smiled. “Because you obviously don’t need me.” He laughed, rolling his hips again, you moaning at the thought of him using the toys on you like he used to.

“Would you like that, princess?” He asked, his tone smug again. “’Cause I can feel you clenching at the thought.”

You didn’t respond, feeling the heat going to your face as your body spoke for you.

“Where are they?” He asked, pulling out entirely, holding a finger up to stop any complaints from you.

“Nightstand drawer.” You mumbled, watching him leave before closing your eyes.

You would fuck yourself over.

With how quick he was, you would’ve thought he never left.

“You’re in for a long night, princess.” He tsked, placing the plug beside you while he turned the vibrator on, setting it to the highest speed before dragging it along your inner thighs, your eyes screwing shut as he placed it over your clit momentarily before holding it as he pulled away. “I hope you don’t have plans tomorrow.” Was all he said before he was back inside you, resuming the pace he set before.

You didn’t open your eyes. You didn’t wanna see what he was doing, how he looked at you, how he moved.

And that was the death of you because you didn’t see him bring the vibrator back to your clit, pressing it hard against you as he used his free hand to hold your hips still as he fucked into you harder.

Your eyes shot open, bringing your arms up to the counter so you could look up at him, your eyes pleading for him to go easy on you.

But he didn’t.

With whatever strength he had left, he used it to completely ruin you, wanting nothing more than for you to scream out as you came.

“I’m gonna cum, fuck.” You nearly cried, your arms giving out as you fell back against the counter, your arms reaching out to grip his wrists.

“Then fucking do it.” He growled, pressing the vibrator even harder against your clit, even going as far as to rub it, loving how you screamed as your walls convulsed around him, his hips faltering from it before cumming himself, turning the vibrator off as his thrusts slowed down, smiling at how you twitched from your orgasm.

As he pulled out, he reached for the plug, smiling as he looked back at you.

“Roll over for me, princess.”

- asshole 4

[yourdeepestfathoms]

Bite The Bullet (and mop the blood spatter up with fur)

Another Hyde fic!!!!!! Enjoy :)

TW: Brief mention of a past suicide attempt and self harm

——————

Was the field Bessie was sneaking onto considered private property, meaning she was trespassing? Maybe. Did she care? Mildly, but her calf’s eager moos erased the fear of getting caught and possibly being arrested.

“Calm down,” She lightly scolded as Hyde bounced and shifted in the passenger seat. She barely got the door open before Hyde bursts out and bounds into the green grass. Bessie laughed. “Someone’s excited!”

Hyde moos and began frolicking gleefully through the field, bouncing and jumping in pure joy. Bessie couldn’t help but go run after her and play along with her like she was a little girl again. (Although playing with cows was not something she ever did as a child in her last life.)

After a few minutes, Hyde abruptly stops and stands still, ears up. Bessie isn’t sure what caught her attention at first, but then she saw the herd of cattle several meters away, staring back at them.

They were highlands.

Hyde started to walk towards the herd and Bessie attempts to stop her, but she soon breaks into a full run.

Bessie stops and hangs back. She watches Hyde close the distance and get surrounded by several cows. They sniff her curiously, letting out soft moos to each other like they were trying to figure out if the little one belonged to one of them. Then, a bulky tawny female with large horns and silver bangs muscles her way to the new calf, tossing her head from side to side to disperse the crowd back a little. She lowers her head and began sniffing Hyde thoroughly before licking her cheek.

It seemed she passed the test.

But would Bessie?

The cow notices Bessie and flared her nostrils. She mooed, seemingly signaling her herd to move back, and lumbered up to the human with her horns up and ready to strike if necessary.

Bessie held perfectly still as possible, holding her breath. Cattle weren’t very fearsome creatures, but those horns looked sharp. One jab from those and her guts would be spilled out everywhere.

The cow’s nose pressed against her stomach, making her squirm slightly. The beast get ruffled by her wiggling and shuffled her hindquarters, stamping her hooves as a warning. When the human stills again, she makes a low, pleased rumble and continued her inspection.

Her snout moves up slowly, sniffing the clothing and occasionally nibbling on it before pulling back. She snorts, then turned back to her herd, mooing for Bessie.

Since then, trips to the field became weekly. Hyde loved to play with the other calves, quickly making friends with the other little cows in the herd. Bessie became pretty close to them, too, being able to get closer and closer each day. She’s even started to give names to the different bovine.

Hyde’s best friend was Tea Biscuit, who had a twin brother named Red Rum. Their mother was a golden heifer named Grandeur. There was also: Vex, Merlin, Umber, Glory, Ombré, Little-Hoof, Excalibur, Nautilus, and JJ. The young bull in the herd was Piggy and the leading female was War Admirable.

War Admirable and Hyde were strangely close, Bessie noticed. All the mother cows were affectionate with the calf, but something about the way War Admirable nuzzled her and mooed to her seemed...different.

While watching Hyde get her choppy bangs groomed lovingly it hit Bessie.

What if War Admirable was Hyde’s mother?

The thought struck her like a freight train.

What if Hyde hadn’t been abandoned by her mum at all? What if they had gotten separated and War Admirable had been looking for her missing baby this entire time?

This wouldn’t leave Bessie at all on the drive home. The way Hyde mooed and pawed the window with her hooves didn’t help at all, either, and she found herself snapping at the calf because of it. Hyde’s ears pin back against her head and she falls silent.

It was silly, being jealous, Bessie knew, but her gut still twisted up like a burning hot knot in her stomach. She didn’t want to give Hyde up, but what if Hyde was happier out in the field? What if she actually hated being cooped up in the house?

What if she was suffering under Bessie’s care?

Bessie didn’t sleep at all that night. Her mind was a whirlwind, a conflicted mess inside of her head. She kept checking on Hyde, who slept peacefully at the end of her bed like a dog would. The calf looked comfortable and content, but would she be happier out in the field with other cattle and her mother?

Her real mother.

God, it was stupid. It was so stupid. Why did Bessie care so much for a cow? She treated the damn thing like it was a child- she pampered and doted on it enough to make it one. Maria has even jokingly made a comment about Hyde being her “favorite daughter”.

It was- it was just-

It was hard to explain. Hyde brought a light to Bessie’s life that she didn’t think would ever be lit up again. It wasn’t like the joy Joan and Maria and Maggie brought, it-it was different. Hyde was more than a simple (but strange) pet. She was so much more than some animal companion, but to put that in words seemed impossible. Especially with the chance of her getting laughed at because, yeah, it sounded so stupid and so silly and so, so childish.

But Hyde was like Bessie’s sun in a weird sort of way. She made sure she got out of bed (pulling on her sleeve with her teeth or sometimes completely ripping all the blankets off), she kept Bessie busy when the intrusive thoughts crept into her mind (getting into messes that gave her something to do), she had Bessie do something with her hands when they so badly wanted to clench a knife or box cutter or razor blade and cut and cut and cut until she was nothing but shredded flesh and blood (the bottle), hell, she even reminded Bessie to drink and eat (when she went to get the milk, she would be reminded that food was necessary for her, too, and they would enjoy their meals together)!

Laugh as much as you want, but Bessie owed everything to that little beast. She’s learned how to laugh and smile and genuinely feel again, not hide behind the facade that she was a strong, powerful woman who could take on everything and come out without a scratch.

And, yes, Bessie had known- still knows- she has Aragon and Anna and Maria, Joan, and Maggie, and even Jane, but sometimes they’re not enough. Animals are different in a way people can’t be. Animals don’t lie, they don’t judge or think about how messed up you are in their heads. They don’t share your secrets or give you false hope. They just- be there. They listen and lend their presence and, sometimes, that’s all that’s needed, and people don’t seem to understand that.

Hyde’s fur has dried more of Bessie’s tears than anyone else ever has. Hyde doesn’t care when Bessie touches her- she doesn’t understand the concept of affairs and CSA. She just cares, even if she didn’t quite understand.

Bessie would probably be dead if it weren’t for her.

(She remembers that night. She remembers how horribly, hopelessly depressed she had been and how she drove out to a field with a note on the dashboard and a gun in the passenger seat.

At the time, nothing had helped her. Her antidepressants weren’t working, Joan and Maggie and Maria’s smiles no longer brought her joy, hugs didn’t help- the only thing that made her happy was watching her blood run down her stomach and thighs when she cut herself.

She had sat in her car for awhile, leaning her head on the steering wheel and wallowing in silence and darkness. Then, she got out, made sure the note was visible, and grabbed the gun.

She considered texting the others, but that would make it hurt worse. It was better to leave them with their last memories of her than to have this sudden news of a goodbye they wouldn’t be able to stop.

She placed the revolver’s barrel in her mouth and rested her finger on the trigger. Her life didn’t flash before her eyes like some movies or books say it did, and she was quite thankful for it. She didn’t want to relive the agony she had been put through. She just shut her eyes as tight as possible in preparation for the bullet to pass through her brain...

Then there was a rustling from the grass nearby.

Bessie hesitated. The metallic taste of the gun left her tongue and she looked in the direction of the noise.

“Hello?” She had called out in her best possible not-about-to-kill-herself voice.

A tiny moo answered her.)

By the time the sun rose, Bessie had a god awful headache that only got worse the longer she thought. Even when she got dressed and went to work she couldn’t stop thinking about Hyde. She didn’t even realize how disheveled and distressed she looked to others until Aragon pointed it out.

“I’m fine.” She grunted, rubbing her temples. “Just...distracted.”

“Why?” Aragon pressed.

Bessie glances up at Aragon, into her warm, loving eyes, and broke.

“Oh, honey...” Aragon gently pulled the crying bassist into a hug. “Shh, shh... It’s okay.”

“No,” Bessie wept, “No-”

Aragon guided Bessie to sit down on the couch in that dressing room before wrapping her back up in her arms.

“Talk to me, Elizabeth. Tell me what’s wrong. Are you okay?”

“I-it’s H-yde-” Bessie’s voice broke further when she said the calf’s name.

“Deep breaths, my darling, deep breaths...” Aragon murmured, rubbing circles against her back. “Tell it to me slow, baby. Don’t push yourself.”

Bessie took a few shallow breaths, which made her cough, but Aragon helped her through it. When she finally found her voice, she began to explain.

“Oh, darling...” Aragon murmured after Bessie finished. “No wonder you’re so upset...”

Bessie sniffled and nodded.

“Wh-what do I do?”

“Well, I don’t think that’s your choice to make.” Aragon said gently, “Maybe Hyde should choose what she wants.”

And so, that evening, Bessie drove out to the field and led Hyde over to the herd on her halter. When they were a few yards away, Bessie takes off the halter and Hyde goes running for the other highlands.

Bessie turns and starts to walk back to her car.

She had her answer. She didn’t need to ask- Hyde would rather be with her kind.

The calf stops her frolic halfway to the other cows and looked over her shoulder. When she saw that Bessie wasn’t coming with her, she let out a confused little moo and trotted back to her human. Bessie notices.

“No, Hyde,” Bessie said, her voice pitching treacherously. “Stay here.”

Hyde blinks up at her.

Bessie began to walk again, but Hyde followed.

“Hyde, no!” She snapped. “Stay here! You’re not coming with me!”

She tried to leave again.

Hyde follows.

“STAY HERE!!” Bessie finally shrieked. All the pain bubbles forth and spilled over. She couldn’t hold back the anguish anymore. “GO! GO AWAY, YOU STUPID COW!! YOU’RE NOT COMING WITH ME!”

She threw the halter as far as she could, heaving her breath from yelling. Tears burned down her cheeks and she whimpered, which morphed into a sob when Hyde turns and trots away.

Bessie hugs herself tightly as she began to hurry back to the car. Her heart ached inside of her chest. She had been preparing for this, for Hyde to leave her, but she hated that their last moment together was her screaming at the poor calf. She hated herself for it. But what else was new there?

Maybe she should get that note back out...and the gun was still in her car...

Bessie’s fingers twitched as if she were imagining gripping the handle again when something wet and soft bumped them.

She jumped around and saw Hyde standing there, tail wagging, the halter in her mouth.

“Why are you still following me?” Bessie growled.

Hyde let out a tiny moo.

Bessie’s knees wobbled and she sunk to the ground. She stared into Hyde’s big, sparkling eyes.

“Why...?” She whispered hoarsely.

Hyde drops the halter into her lap and then leaned forward, sniffing Bessie’s face. Her nostrils flare, blowing soft, warm puffs of air against the bassist’s skin. Then she gently licked her cheek.

Bessie shattered.

“Oh, Hyde,” Bessie sobbed. She threw her arms around the calf’s neck and buried her face in the soft fur. “Oh, baby girl... I’m so sorry, Hyde. I’m so sorry... You’re not stupid! I’m so sorry I called you stupid, baby, I’m so sorry... I love you s-so much...” She broke off into heavy cries and whines, gripping tightly to the calf, who nuzzled her lovingly with her head.

Bessie pulled back after several long minutes of crying. She gently pressed her head against Hyde’s forehead, weeping softly, then stared into the calf’s glistening eyes.

She swore they were saying, “I choose you.”

[mrneighbourlove]

Into the Darkness and Unknown: Ch 8. Connection to Humanity

Malik had a stack of notes and letters ready to give to his family at the castle and to his wife. Although he couldn't send them, he dearly missed his wife and children. Asakonigei would be worried sick for sure. If they didn't have children, Malik would be worried she'd leave him. "Dear Asa. Today marks a month since the incident with the necromancer. Starting to grow a small beard, and I feel as so much more animalistic here. There is a sense of community amongst these monsters, a special sense of power being amongst the biggest predators. Although I've enjoyed it for a time, I miss the company of Zarazu, my forces in the castle, and especially you. I love you, my coal covered diamond. I hope to see your smile soon."

Finishing his latest letter, he placed it in the mail bag he had with the rest.

Leere arrived at the hut, gathering her supplies. One look at her and Malik could tell she was exhausted in both body and voice. "We're leaving."

"What? Just like that? What about our mutual friend of Hyrule?

"Yes. Bonegrinder may be unconscious for another month, maybe a year. And I know you have family to attend to. Let's not dawdle. This might take us a couple hours."

Malik watched in silence for a few moments at Leere quickly buzzing around like a bee, until he too slowly started to gather his things.

It was almost three hours later when Mother arrived. She looked... frazzled. And annoyed. "Forgive my lateness, I was currently trying to handle---" She nearly jumped out of her exoskeleton as Bonegrinder suddenly just flopped off her back onto the ground with a loud giggle. "... the situation."

"Hehehe, piggy back... piggy back rides!"

"Leere... what did you do?" Mother looked at the princess with knowing eyes. "Did you give him some of your magic?"

"Butts. Exo-butt. Exoskeleton ass." The Anagari was poking Mother's backside with his tail. "Hard ass. Get it? HARD ASS!!!" He snickered at his own joke. "Cause of the exoskeleton."

"Modoc, would you please quit that?"

"Aw. But it's a good joke!"

"Yes. I did. He's never been like this before when I've done it though." Leere, with her tiny body, tried to nudge a giant off a titan. "Hey buddy, why don't we stop climbing on the charming chimera lady eh?"

"But... HIC, he likes piggyback rides." Bonegrinder was still partly slumped on Mother. He tried to get his bearing and slithered forward, and wobbled back and forth before slumping on the ground, on his belly. "Dirt. This is dirt. Hrm... right, right, good dirt. Good dirt for mud wrestling."

"That's because I was giving him light energy and you gave him dark energy and there obviously was not a correct balance on either side." Mother ran her hand down her face. "And now he's... well... the best way to explain it is, he's drunk. Off a magic high."

"Why are you so tall?" Bonegrinder looked up at Leere. "You're supposed to be tiny."

"Modoc, can you slither?"

"But he likes it down here."

"Can. You. Slither?"

"The dirt is moving, it's hard to slither." The Anagari pouted.

"Kaksa give me patience..."

"Cause I'm a little human?" Leere, after so much stress at seeing him hurt and possessed, couldn't stop herself from snorting in amusement at his behaviour now.

Malik, however, shook his head. "Mother. Are there any others that wish to say goodbye?"

"I had the others write in this little book for you." Mother handed Leere two small notebooks, one for Malik and one for the princess herself. "It's their accounts of you. Their impressions. Goodbyes here are meant for never to be seen again. You will return one day."

"Nooo, you're... you... wait, you are hooman. Whadaya doing here?" Bonegrinder hiccupped once more. "Omisha is for Echidnans not hoomans!"

"You're going to take her home, Bonegrinder, you and Malik here."

"Who?" Bonegrinder then looked at the Gerudo. "Oooh..."

Malik rubbed his temple, moving to pick Bonegrinder off the dirt floor. "Thank you for your hospitality Mother. I look forward to our continued business together as allied nations. I'll make sure your 'boy' gets home."

Leere too, took Mother's hand, giving her a princessly kiss. "Thank you for giving me the opportunity to learn. Until we meet again."

"Until we meet again." Mother then started to open the portal... while Bonegrinder decided it was the perfect time to hit on the Gerudo 'lady' holding his man tit, when really it was just a supportive gesture to keep him off the ground.

"Hmm, you're a fine piece of treasure you know that?" Bonegrinder grinned widely with as his tail slapped Malik's backside. "Come here and let him kiss you for good blessings from Sand and Stone sisters, yes? Kissing a Gerudo lady is good luck." He then grabbed the sides of the lord's face and smooched him for all he was worth.

Malik's face bloomed in a flush of light pink with furious fire burning inside his soul. His armour kept him protected on the breast and most of his ass, but there was nothing that could be done about the kisses. This was another reason to always wear a helmet. His gauntlets stabbed into Bonegrinder's skin as he put all his upper strength into lifting him, and all his lower strength into getting him through the portal back to Hyrule's underground. Leere couldn't help but break out into laughter as she gathered all the bags of material. Malik was absolutely livid by this point. "Quit your chortles and hurry through the portal!"

Leere quit her laughing long enough to look back at Omisha. The hot air and jungle atmosphere blew a silent wind. Did her coming her ruin something in the land? She shook her head to silence such a thought before it could grow into something more. Hurrying through the portal, the three of them returned to Hyrule. It was time she went back home.

~

There journey from a colourful, yet dangerous land, a very drunk Bonegrinder, an irate Malik, and a tired Leere found themselves in the dark underground of Hyrule's caverns under castle town.

"Where you going, baby doll?" Bonegrinder flicked his tail back and forth playfully as Malik spewed every curse known to man in ancient tongue, and spitted. The Anagari was still not acquainted to his equilibrium just yet. He wobbled, snickering the entire time. "He wants to tap that fine ass, come back here! We got to 'pray' to the sand and stone sisters, heeheehee..." He looked at Leere and asked. "Doesn't she have a nice ass? You have nice tits, and she has a nice ass. Bonegrinder has... he has... well, he has a big dick. Does that count as attractive?"

"Yeah. I've seen it up close big guy. Its certainly something. That's also a Gerudo male, not a woman Bonegrinder." Leere felt the least she could do was put Malik out of his misery.

"Oh..." Bonegrinder's train of thought was still processing the information. "Well... good thing he is bi or this would be a very teachable moment. Never judge the sex by the jiggle of ass cheeks. It's misleading."

"I don't think he is Bonegrinder. Perhaps you should lie down."

Before Leere could say anything else, with the speed of a minitour, Hades charged out of the darkness, his breath burning with cinders at the smell of Bonegrinder.

"My friend! You're back!"

"KITTY!!!" Bonegrinder suddenly latched onto the Lynel and petted his mane. Then he held his face and asked, "Has he ever... ever told you HIC how fluffy you are? Just so fluffy, and soft, and so cute..."

Hades stood perfectly still, allowing the master of the Hive to pet him, simply glad that Bonegrinder was unharmed. Taking in his behaviour, he growled deeply towards Leere. "What in the hell did you cause now?"

"He's just a little drunk off some magic. Now that he's safe and sound, I'm sure you and the rest of the Hive can entertain him."

The Lynel grumbled, fire snorting out his nostrils. "Get out of here. You're lucky that entertaining Bonegrinder is what the other members of the Hive have been longing to do just a week into his trip."

"Fluffy... fluffy baby!" Bonegrinder draped his long body across Hades' back, still messing with the Lynel's mane. "He thinks... he thinks you would look like... look like so ravishing with... with big braids. Big, long, braids..."

"Oh good goddesses, what happened now?" Red appeared from the shadows and levitated, looking at the master of the Hive. "... he's drunk. Must have been some party."

"Sex machine!"

"Well, at least he recalls who I am."

"And fluffy kitty."

"And who Hades is."

"Fluffy kitty, purr for Bonegrinder."

"Okay, let's get him back into his dwelling before 'fluffy kitty' has an aneurysm." Red waved goodbye to Malik and Leere. "We'll take care of him."

Leere was courteous enough to wave back while Malik aggressively applied a handkerchief to clean off the scent of Bonegrinder’s kisses. “Tell Blue and White I said hi. Oh. They should probably send a letter to their father and sister sometime.”

Walking together out of the Hive, Leere and Malik both released a heavy shared sigh. There were so much bizarre circumstances seen and felt within the last month. A personal take away was a deeper understanding of each other. Leere looked up to the Gerudo giant, smiling coly. “You know, he ain’t that bad a lover.”

“Please no.”

“What, you never thought of using that junk inside your trunk to fit tighter holes?”

“If you don’t quit it, I’m going to shove a rag into that mouth of yours.”

“That mean tight holes are still on the table.”

“You’re so immature.”

“You’re a tad uptight.”

“And you’re unbelievable.”

Both of them snickered, their chortle soon shared into a warm, soft laugh.

The princess jotted down in her mind what would need to be done as an ambassador to Omisha, if Mother still wanted her that is. Leere knew she made an impression on the monstrous woman, both good and some bad probably.

“Malik. We just simply going to walk into the castle chambers?”

“I see why not.”

Leere thought it over. “Want to take a bet?”

“Sure.”

“Zarazu is going to want to tackle you. Zelda or Rinku will squeeze me too tightly. Ralnor will cross his arms and squint his eyes wanting details on Omisha. Best he knows the capacity of our knowledge. I will make him furious when I say I was able to stay a night in Mother’s bed. Finally, your wife is going to kick your ass to the moon.”

Malik frowned in fear at that thought. That would be an inevitable conversation. “Oh lord you’re probably right.”

The man felt her pat the back of his armour, a cheeky smile on her face, yet a serene kindness from her energy. “Pretty sure she’ll break into tears for you though. People love you enough for that.”

“And you believe they won’t for you?” Malik looked downward, his gaze resting on her small frame. “You’re a very lonely woman Leere.” Before she could respond, Malik continued, “But you need not be. Your shadow stays close to people, watching over others. And like a shadow, you disappear in true darkness. You aren’t the type to reveal in it. Stop believing that darkness owns you. As a shadow, you can master it for good.”

Leere flushed slightly, unsure what to say in reply for a moment or two. “That’s... beautiful. No one has put me into words like that.”

“You don’t need to thank me.”

“Well... you can have it anyways. Thank you.”

“Heh. Don’t get sentimental on me. Come, I think we’re about to reach the castle’s secret entrance soon.”

~

Zarazu was in the middle of a meeting with a few of the council members. She loathed these meetings with a passion. Since Covarog was dealing with another diplomatic issue in Danjur, she was stuck here. Sometimes, she wished the old coots would go senile and forget about these monthly meetings. The queen was just about to bring forth another issue when Malik and Leere walked in... and her mouth dropped open.

Malik had placed his helmet over his head to keep up appearances as Lord of Hyrule. Finally able to breath the air of Hyrule once more, he waved to everyone in the room. “At ease.”

Leere smiled to her sister in law, tiredly placing the stacks of research on a desk close to her. “Greetings everyone. We didn’t interrupt anything too important?”

"... gone for a just over a month and hardly any word?!" Zarazu exclaimed as she rose from her seat so fast, her chair nearly toppled backwards. "What in hell took so long?! A 'hi, I'm not dead' would have been nice! That's for the both of you! Do you have any idea how worried we all were?!"

“Apologies my friend. There was an incident that left us stranded without transportation back to Hyrule, as well as a zero communication policy put into place.” From a bag, he handed her several letters. “It did not stop me from writing to you.”

"That's... that's... ridiculous!" Zarazu was angry, more so about the fact that there could have been something horribly wrong, and she had no way to help. "No location, no backup plan, no return date!!! We were worried sick! We had no way to find you! You know Asa is going to kick your ass. I'm tempted to give you a kick to the ass myself." The queen then glanced at Leere. "And you should know better. You had your brothers and sisters all worried that you were gone off on another journey never to return for another decade."

“Zarazu. I’m sure they can tell me that themselves. I wasn’t in danger of being alone. Malik and I looked out for one another.” Leere raised her hands in light defense. “We made a great deal of progress in learning about Omisha, as well as our relationship with the Echidnan people.”

"... as an order from your queen, the next time you two wish to suddenly disappear and go off on a month-long journey, you will leave a location, you will inform me or at least one of the family, and you will send updates." Zarazu was leaving no room for argument. "Am I clear? My king has enough stress upon him already, nor do I. This is not negotiable."

“Did Ralnor not tell you?” Malik knew damn well he didn’t, but he needed to let Zarazu know that information had been available to her. “My wife knew as well, but since we no longer live at the castle, I can understand about you being left in the dark.”

"Ralnor knew not where you were either. I asked him." Zarazu told Malik with a small huff. Of course, Ralnor would keep his place in this whole situation in the dark to his queen. Not that Zarazu knew. "And Asa knew you were going on a journey, but had no clue you would be so long!”

“I said Omisha to her.” Malik sighed, waving a hand to dismiss the other nobles to move on. “Zarazu, there are more important matters to discuss then my or the princess’ safety.”

"Fine... but if you do this again, I'm putting a locator spell on you both." Zarazu warned the pair but then turning to the old coots on the council. "I apologize, this is an emergency. I will return later."

"But... but we..."

"We will continue later." Zarazu then gestured to Leere and Malik to follow her to a more private area.

“I’d suggest that you summon your husband and other members of royalty.”

"Covarog is in Danjur, Tebanam is exploring ruins with Faris, Kanisa is in Uskar, Orana is on a trip with Corsaire, and Ralnor is actually on holiday, so you're stuck with me." Zarazu then sat in the office she shared with her husband, gesturing for Leere and Malik to sit.

“Very well.” Malik took his seat, and was brutally blunt with his next statement. The Queen needed to know the storm that brewed in the future for Hyrule. “We fought against a disciple of Teufel. The Demon tried to inflict a strike against the citizens of Omisha using the Mortuus that tried to assassinate you. It spoke to us through this disciple. Teufel is active, and he is dangerous.”

"... wow... okay... well..." Zarazu was not really sure what to say. "Omisha... the country of Echidnans. I really thought it was merely a myth. So it's all real... and Teufel is back." She took a breath, trying to rational her thoughts and what was possibly the best objective to do next. "One day, Teufel will be back. We don't know when, so we need to have our guard up. It could be now or later. Next, I think we need to establish a communication link with Omisha. We need to find out if there is a leader there and see if they are interested in perhaps combining forces or sharing knowledge of this Teufel being. Then next, I believe a diplomatic visit is in order, if the leader agrees... I might have to ask Ralnor to come back from holiday early. He knows a little of the Echidnans, and perhaps Teb will."

“We met their leader and established an alliance over the last month.” Leere added to the conversation. “Their leader is very protective of her land, so I don’t know if she’ll have just anyone over.” Leere presented notes and sketches of the island and different variants of Echidnans and their land. “They have many reasons to mistrust most humans.”

"Oh..." Zarazu carefully looked over the documents. There were pieces of history here that had been missing for thousands of years. There were answers to questions about... many issues. She was shocked. "Why..." The queen cleared her throat. "Why did you not inform me?"

Both of them held their tongues. Leere looked as though she was bound to a secret oath, which she was. Malik crossed his arms tightly, feeling the need to be defensive. “Zarazu, there are things in this world that are beyond your understanding to comprehend.”

"That I know, but this is not beyond my comprehension. This is simply just keeping..." Zarazu was trailed off and then became... quiet for once. More so than usual. It was not difficult for the queen to put two and two together. Malik, Leere... the pair of them were keeping something about this trip from her. "... tell me about Malus. I'm more concerned over demon-summoning necromancers than a country full of monsters."

The air lifted, that information being acceptable to share. “Malus, from what we gather, is a land both encased in evil, and possibly having innocents trapped within for hundreds of generations. As Lord, my professional opinion is to have a covert invasion of the country. Not even the Echidnans have ventured in the land. Notes taken were from fleeing Mortuus.”

"When?" Zarazu asked, keeping her eyes glued to the information on the country of Malus. From what the Echidnans provided, it did not sound too promising. "And is there any hint on to where the innocents might be? You cannot walk into a country like this blindly without a plan."

“In underground cities, and according to the last document, since the formation of your people’s monarchy.” Leere sounded somber. “It’s a very conflicting feeling. The first Mortuus I met in my adult life, and she turned out to be as evil as the Echidnans warned. Yet, if there are innocents, my heart goes out for them.”

Leere brought up a book she borrowed on Mortuus history. The first page she pointed out held an illustration of ten-foot-tall wolves. Next were sketches of demonic golems made of flesh. “According to old documented data, Malus is filled with bizarre monsters of all varieties.”

"Demonic possessions and flesh-stitched hosts for them to use for their time on this earth." Zarazu frowned, trying to think of any magic she knew to protect the kingdom against the evil in Malus. "You've certainly done enough research."

Malik tapped a pen on the desk, writing a recommendation. “Zarazu, you should know I will be taking charge as lead negotiator to Omisha.”

"You?" Zarazu shook her head, thinking he simply had forgotten. "Malik, a member of a royal family is supposed to take lead of negotiations for new alliances. Ralnor is the one who told us of Omisha's interest. He should be the one to take charge." She then reminded him. "What we have with Al-Daida is due to Tebanam, with Danjur thanks to Orana, with Uskar kudos to Kanisa, Labrynna was cemented long ago and Covarog handles that, so Ralnor should be in charge with Omisha. He's already submitted paperwork for the job."

“No. Ralnor is a liar and a manipulator. His role is here, in Hyrule. It is he who has kept you in the dark for so long about Omisha. It is he who held Leere and I to secrecy. A secret he’d have preferred hidden had we not discovered Echidnans so close to Hyrule....” Malik kept his voice calm, steady, yet forced his hand in the matter. “As Ganondorf’s blood relative, I too have claim to royal status. Leere has proven herself most effective in forming a bond with the heart of Omisha. It’s people. Ralnor might be Mother’s choice, for that is ultimately up to her, however, her and I have already agreed to being the most concrete link in negotiations.”

Zarazu was getting irritated word by word that came out of Malik.

"Okay, I don't know what is going on between you and Ralnor, but it stops. Like, right now." The queen had nothing negative from her husband's brother about the ex-commander. If anything, Ralnor had been nothing but courteous, singing Malik's praises for doing such a wonderful job. Yet, all Malik seemed to do was bash Ralnor's name. She was getting very tired of it. "I've heard you drag his name through the mud over and over, and not once has he said one word against you. I don't know what fight you two had, or if he was keeping a secret from you and it blew over, or if it's a dick size thing, but whatever the hell it is, right now, it stops." She then added, "In the dark about Omisha? Malik, if anything you were the one keeping me in the dark. Ralnor gave what all he had."

To prove her point, Zarazu fetched the files that Ralnor had dated... years ago... and placed them in Malik's hands. Unknown to the queen, she was playing the part exactly how the second prince wanted her to do so. Ralnor was a master manipulator, and no one could accuse him of such without the accuser looking like a fool in the eyes of others. He was that good. "I understand whatever conversation you had with this 'Mother' person is important, but as far as I'm concerned, Ralnor is the one who will handle affairs." Once again, the prince had been three steps ahead of Malik, portraying him to be the quote on quote 'bad guy'. "And if you and Leere wish to aid him in his endeavors, then you may do so. Though in the future, if you do wish to share what information you have, I'd be happy to hear it."

The queen of Hyrule then took a slow breath. She was already very incensed by the fact that there was information hidden from her. Ralnor told her that he suspected Malik was up to something, but she did not believe him. After all, Ralnor was always known for his paranoia. Yet, this time, he was right.

She then asked Leere, "You mentioned Malus has innocents trapped. Before you decide to go on this expedition, might I inquire as to how you are going to avoid detection if you wish to stay incognito?"

Malik was furious, yet he hid it well behind a cold, chilling anger. In an unexpected first against Zarazu, he completely pushed back, stopping the pale princess from answering. “Zarazu... your naïveté is exactly why I did not recommend you for a position in dealing with Omisha’s people. Ralnor will not be in the future of Hyrule’s head of negotiations with the leader of the Echidnans. You lack the fortitude for it, and him the heart. You can both take care in knowing I won’t step over your heads for long. It is your eldest daughter who will have a future with Omisha. Mother has declared it so.”

"And your temper is why you will not be handling any foreign negotiations as lead." Zarazu then told him in an icy tone. "If you're going to insult me and act like this, then there's the door. I don't care what this 'Mother' said right now, I am your friend but I am also your queen. If you cannot have the respect for me or my brother-in-law, then leave. I am so sick and tired of fighting, and I'm not going to do it anymore today."

“The choice, dear friend, is simply not up to you. It is destiny. I’m sure the leader of Omisha will find purpose for the three of us. But not you. You are my friend Zarazu... but given that the fates will bring death and war upon us soon with the very gods, I must look at the bigger picture.” Malik finished his recommendation. “I will train your daughter to be the best Gerudo Queen she can be. I also recommend you ally with the Kikai Empire and Danjur to liberate Malus. After recon of course. Now, if excuse me... I have a son, daughter and wife of my own to tend to.”

With no other word, Leere watched as Malik left the office. Spewing about destiny and so coldly calculating the future of Hyrule as if Malik himself was King did indeed worry her, but it wasn’t Leere’s place to judge him. That duty would be left to her brother and Zarazu. The princess took a few breaths, looking back to the Queen. “Any questions on your mind?”

"... many questions and so few answers, Leere." Zarazu ran her hands back there her hair, appearing to look so defeated. "I am tired, Leere. So tired of blame, of fighting, and arguing. I hate myself for wishing to escape back to Lorleidi. None of this," She motioned to her surroundings. "Existed there. No hate, no fighting, no... no having to look for the better in people. I simply knew it was there. But here, now?" The queen sighed. "I spent four hours arguing with those old coots in the council room about their apparent homophobia and how my kingdom would let love be love... and not one of them gave thought to any possibility of not being able to love who they love."

Leere gently took Zarazu’s hands, suddenly feeling an overwhelming sense of emotion. Despite her getting along better with Malik, they only had a professional relationship. She was also surrounded with monsters that either tolerated her, completely mistrusted her, made her feel uncomfortable, or simply needed more time to get along better with. Touching Zarazu’s hands, someone that, sure, she didn’t know the best about on a day to day basis, but still respected and come to care for, made her cry. Her experience in Omisha with retrospect now horrified her, throwing herself into the darkest of secrets, finding out she was a sacrifice for a being that’d bring tyranny and chaos, losing trust in a friend she held close... her tears swelled. “Oh god... I’m sorry. It feels like years since I talked with someone else who feels human.”

"Oh, spirits, Leere, don't cry!" Zarazu looked alarmed at the princess' sudden tears. What brought on the waterworks?! She pulled her into a tight hug. "I'm sorry if I made you upset! Please, don't cry, I was just rambling because Malik really knows how to push my buttons, don't cry for my sake!"

“No. Please. It’s just Omisha. It was... it was so much. I feel so old Zarazu. I learned and experienced... terrible knowledge.” Leere didn’t object to a deep hug, however. “Zarazu... you’re such a sweet soul. Please... if you want to learn anything I know, ask. I don’t care if Malik, Ralnor, or anyone else wants to keep a lid on things.”

"It's okay, it's okay... maybe questions later? I think right now, you just need a breather." Zarazu patted her back gently. "Heh, according to Malik, I'm a she-devil, Ba'puu is nothing but a pest, and Ralnor is Vul'kar's right hand. I'm only sweet to those I like. I guess you got lucky today, huh?" She said in good humor, trying to make Leere laugh. "... you want a sugar cookie? I hid a few cookie baggies in my desk."

“Zarazu... my birth parents set me up to be a sacrifice to Teufel.” The words escaped her lips, nearly broken getting out. The tears still kept coming. Leere sounded broken, like something in her soul was taken and violently snapped in two. “I found this out from a friend who only told me now after keeping this knowledge from me for years because he wasn’t right in his mind... Zarazu. I can’t leave Hyrule ever again... it’s that, or I kill myself.”

"... I... I don't know about all of this Teufel business, and I certainly have no clue about this friend of yours that likes to keep secrets, but..." Zarazu tried her best to choose the proper words of comfort. "I guess... sometimes secrets are kept to protect who we love. I've kept my share over the years. If this prevents you from leaving Hyrule, then... there's nothing wrong with just staying here a while until you're ready to fight. And when you are, I'll fight with you. Two old ladies... side by side."

Leere actually chuckled at that, drying her tears. “Friends name is Bonegrinder. Same person Malik and Ralnor know, though I’m sure they’ll deny it. Boys and their secrets, playing with power... Maybe, when he feels up to it, you can meet him one day. He came to Hyrule from Omisha actually, but due to privacy, he likes his isolation from most people.” A solid weight lifted off her chest. After meeting the people of Omisha, it seemed silly for Bonegrinder and the Hive to remain hidden. Out of continued respect, however, she wouldn’t fully disclose their location. “I’m sorry I cried. Malik failed to mention we fought demons as well, only three days in. I broke my leg in the fight, and saw things that I think my nightmares will enjoy.” One more thought to express on her mind. “Zarazu, what do you know of Gods of Balance, Creation and Destruction?”

"That's... well... uh..." Zarazu tried to formulate a response. She honestly did not know what to say. What could she say to make all of this better? "You're going to have to give me a bit to process all of that. More secrets, a reason to scold both Malik and Ralnor, you fought demons, got hurt, and a monster is leaving in Hyrule. I hope I didn't miss anything." The queen then offered the princess a few tissues. "Oh... let's see here. There used to be an old story that was told around the bonfires at might about a 'Mother Goddess and the Two Brothers'. There was even an old song with it, something about a prophecy. If I remember correctly, we received it centuries ago from a traveler." It suddenly clicked in Zarazu's mind. "... a traveler from Omisha."

“Indeed. Listen, if this trip has taught me anything, I worry more about humans than the actual monsters. Despite being cold and distant, perhaps not getting human connections or emotions, you don’t see Monsters ripping one another down for the sake of a power struggle.” Leere smiled, a fond memory making her feel better. “It wasn’t all distressing though. Met some children who I think I’ve helped break the bond of fear between humans and monsters.” She carefully showed the fine details of her sketch. “Met a wonderful chick named Solani. Must admit, I felt rather... motherly towards her.”

"All of this is a lot to take in for one afternoon... I think you and I will have to dedicate another afternoon to finish the rest of my questions." Zarazu gave a dry laugh. "Well, Leere, I mean, you'd be a great mom. You're wonderful with kids. All your nieces and nephews love you. If you don't want to get married, then why don't you adopt? Or you could always find a donor."

“Perhaps...” Leere settled her mind upon looking at the picture she drew of Solani. “I think the safest places I can be are here in Hyrule... or beside Mother. I would like to see Solani again, despite the risks of Teufel...” Closing her sketchbook, Leere left documentation on the Queens desk. “Be sure to get these copied after you’ve read them over. Didn’t fight the denizens of Hell so knowledge would go to waste. And tell you what. Soon as you finish up all the laws giving more freedom to gay rights, then I’ll settle down. Would you like tea with me over the weekend to continue our conversation further Zarazu?”

"Whatever you decide, it's important that you're happy." Zarazu agreed with a soft smile. "Tea sounds wonderful."

“Then I look forward to it.” Leere made her way out of the office, sighing to herself once out of earshot. She hoped she could sleep soundly tonight. Was staying in the unknown better, just as Bonegrinder forewarned? Only time would reveal that answer and more.

________________________________________________________________

Previous Ch. https://mrneighbourlove.tumblr.com/post/190931724986/into-the-darkness-and-unknown-ch-7-the-burden-of

Next Ch. https://mrneighbourlove.tumblr.com/post/610955133909614592/into-the-darkness-and-unknown-ch-9-into-the

[bladekindeyewear]

Boots Reads Homestuck Epilogue(s) Part 12 - Candy Page 18

==>

Time to see what all the fuss was about Page 18.  We’re with Jane... that might not be good.  Especially given Lollipop proximity.

Jane scoffing at troll genocide again.  :(

Gamzee seems more woke than Jane here.

GAMZEE: sO yOu SaYiN yOu NeEd DiFfErEnT sHoEs FoR yOuR hUmAn DiCkS aNd WhAt NoT?

Pfffff

Jane narrows her eyes at the disingenuous buffoon.

I dunno, he sounds like he’s being pretty goddamn ingenuous right now.

It’s not the first time they’ve had this conversation?  Are they black with each other or something??

What’s more likely is he’s attempting to get a rise from her. To get her a little hotter under the collar. To put her in a certain mood.

Oh my gosh she’s genuinely black for him, hahahahah

GAMZEE: AnD AlL I EvEr bEeN TrYiN To dO Is gEt yOu rIgHt tOo, WiTh mOrAlS AnD GoOdNeSs, AlL fIlLeD uP iNsIdE yOu As TiGhT aS yOuR tAsTy HoE bAlLoOnS aRe WiTh HuMaN mOo JuIcE.

Jesus christ that’s not the kind of metaphor i want to be hearing from canon

or anyone for that matter

JANE: No! I’d rather die than touch your disgusting clown baton ever again.

....yyyeah, context is showing she’s PROBABLY super Black into this.  Still, pretty jarring to see a clear consensual “NO” right in the middle of things.

Quit calling her a dairy queen!!! D: D: D:

Oh god they named the baby Tavros.

Alright, there’s some grade A discomfort in this scene, which I’m enjoying, really.  I can see why they singled out page 18.  I could traumatize some people with some of these paragraphs out of context.

HOO HOO HOO, THIS LITTLE PIGGY WENT TO THE DARK CARNIVAL!!!

Eeeeuugh

JAKE: Anyway whats up with you? Hows life with davekat going? JADE: oh its great! im really glad i just went for it JADE: all of us together... it really is the best of every world

God damnit Jade why are you obliviously torturing them????????

You could’ve been REALLY GOOD for them both if you just FUCKING LISTENED TO THEM AND RESPECTED THEM INSTEAD OF SITTING ON THEM.

JADE: theres no way me and dave could have a regular baby together because im... JAKE: Whats wrong? JADE: well lets just say that after all the sburb stuff its done some things to my body JADE: like merging with bec mostly

Oh my FUCKING GOD please don’t canonize this.  This didn’t need to be spelled out so-- D:

jesus

D: D: D:

This... is actually making my stomach roil again????

like

not because id object to-- i mean, it’s one thing to deal with

FAN SCENARIOS

ISOLATED divergences from canon where she has to deal with that and its kind of hilarious, but can be safely ignored when it comes to her character arc as a whole

but once its CANON????????   D: D: D:

suddenly you can’t IGNORE the full import when you’re done with, like, an RP or something, of the psychological struggle she would be forced to deal with given an abnormal biological situation.  Instead of thinking “Oh, that could be pretty painful to deal with! Let’s explore it temporarily for fun” it becomes “Oh, that would be painful to deal with and you have to think about her having to deal with all the complications of that whenever you hear about her LITERALLY FOREVER.”  D:

andrew i know you couldnt resist because of how funny and practically-xenoprogressive it was but whyyyyyyyyy did you have to canonize that WHYYYY

Now instead of a fun joke thought it also has to be SAD FOREVER

AAAAAAAA  D’:

i dont know why this would be the line thats crossed to upset me

Rose surrogate?

JADE: no jake, dave wouldnt be the father in this scenario!

Pffffff.  Andrew’s just diving RIGHT into the, er, doggy fanfics here.  I should... TRY to lighten up about this.  Try.  D:

(...wait, shit.  Knowing my friend, THIS whole bit is why they alluded to this page.  God damnit.)

[[ EDIT:  askshenhibiki said:

Now that you read Candy 18, flash back to Meat when Roxy is talking about gender... and look at Jade's reaction looking at "where her hands rest on her lap". Yes, Meat hinted at that "mix" too.

Ah, let’s see...

ROXY: and so i got to thinking ROXY: what even is gender ROXY: amirite lol? JADE: oh yeah JADE: that makes sense i guess........

Jade looks at where her hands are folded in her lap. Bites her lip. She has her own concerns about this, her own thoughts. Reasonable thoughts, I’d say. But I’ll refrain from any further comment. I’m staying away from this subject, from now on.

...yeah, guess Dirk at least had the decency not to spring all that on us before Jade got the opportunity to do it honestly. ]]

Guh, back to Jake suffering in his sad, trapped scenario.  I hope THAT gets at least resolved by the end of this.  Someone save Jake from this, because it looks like he’s not really that capable of saving himself?

==>

Dammit, Jade, I’m cringing at these descriptions of your intrusion.

Oh wow, John went for the mustache.  Guess we knew that from, like, his stuffed statue oldself?

Jade doesn’t pick up on the obvious subtext in the conversation, however, because she’s been willfully undermining the subtext in her own personal life for nearly a year now.

D:  D:  D:

Seriously, Jade, how is what YOU’RE doing any better than what you were frustrated at seeing THEM doing, avoiding the real feelings and truth of anything even if it was conspicuously on body-language display?

KARKAT: THE NEW ADMINISTRATION IS CRACKING DOWN ON CERTAIN KINDS OF INTERSPECIES ADOPTION LAWS.

It’s like Andrew wants us deprived of even a happy imagined future for Earth C on top of everything else!!!  What the hell! >:(

Is this about politics?  Is Andrew just venting his anger that the Orange Guy is going to get away with ruining everything forever??  Because as understandable as that is, he could at least give us some imaginary happyfutures to look forward to.

Reading on... Hm, yet another intentionally-misused fridging reference.

KARKAT: HIS RELATIONSHIP IS A FLAMING WRECK OF AN INTERSTELLAR WARSHIP HURTLING TOWARDS THE PLANET AT TERMINAL VELOCITY WITH THE ENTIRE CREW BRUTALLY SLAUGHTERED UPON REENTRY, SHOVED STRAIGHT DOWN THE CHAGRIN TUNNEL AND THEN IMMEDIATELY SHAT OUT THE OTHER SIDE, THUS FLOODING THE ENTIRE FUCKING NEIGHBORHOOD WHEN IT CLOGS UP THE LOAD GAPER.

Yep, that triangle’s fucked.  Wonder if the conversation’s going to transition to the CURRENT triangle’s problems...

...yeah, John using the R word there isn’t far from the fucking truth from the looks of things.

JADE: maybe that would work for a few days, but one thing i learned from dating around a lot in my youth is that no ones going to leave a bad relationship until its THEIR idea to leave

She takes in a shaky breath and shuts her eyes. Her hair spills around her face when she leans forward to put her chin on her knees. Dave and Karkat exchange a look that is equal parts confused, miserable, and desperate.

Oh SHIT.  Is JADE going to be the one to finally vocalize about the problems here???

Something else comes hurtling out of the hole in the sky, too fast for Jade to catch. It hits the ground with a clap of green lightning. The collision sends a geyser of dirt, rock, and vapor into the air. Dave flash-steps to shield Karkat. Jade doesn’t move, taking the brunt of the explosion face on, using her abilities to warp the energy around her so that she’s a mote at the center of the storm. When the dust clears, she’s the first to jump in the crater, trailing smoke behind her.

There’s a body at the center of it. The torso is bloody, tangled, and curled into a fetal position. Its shoes are missing, but otherwise the outfit is quite familiar to her: it’s a dead ringer for her old Witch of Space uniform. Jade touches the body with the toe of her shoe, and then gasps when it rolls over to reveal its face.

JADE: its... JADE: ME???

Okay what the FUCK.  It sounds like there’s going to be some context for that postscript after all.  Something to bridge the gap between when that 16-yo Jade falls into the singularity and when Aradia goes off with her through a wormhole

I’m going to guess up front that this happens BEFORE the postscript... this younger version of Jade fell into the black hole and came out in THIS alternate timeline, possibly rather changed by the experience.  But then again, the way the sky opened up... actually, couldn’t that be just a “natural” manifestation of the black hole abilities encouraged by Calliope or done by the singularity alone, followed by later in the Postscript this Jade actually getting control of it??

And... reading on, from the sound of it, her eyes aren’t black yet, either.  Sounds like that’s to come, before the postscript.  Question being, is it alt!Callie black eyes, or some black-hole-powers visual manifestation?  Wait, never mind, I misread; this teenage Jade-corpse has NOT opened their eyes yet, so they couldn’t possibly tell, and the stuff about them “shaking” was about the adult Jade standing over her.  Never mind.  Let’s see which timeframe this Jade came from.

Also STOP TRAUMATIZING ADULT JADE ON SCREEN ITS NOT OKAY IM SICK OF IT ANDREW

==>

Page 20...

Stop letting babby not!Vriska bully babby not!Tavros.

Hm... same stupid tooth poison?  No, Jade didn’t get hit with a tooth... so it’s more getting hit with shards of spacetime and spiraling down a black hole.  Also whatever alt!Callie did to just barely keep her alive.

Hm, so the Heart stuff falls apart if you’re too separated from the mass-whole at Light’s center?  That’s certainly a hypothesis at least.

ROXY: sounds like its time for another funeral lmao

ROXY WAKE THE FUCK UP AND STOP BEING A VAGUELY ROXY-LOOKING LMAO-ZOMBIE.  WHERE THE FUCK DID REAL ROXY GO.

And where the fuck is Calliope anyway, she’s just being left in the dust and nobody’s even talked to her from the looks of it.

Hm, cut apart by political differences, this group...?

ROXY: woah ok karkat i get ur all fired up about politics and stuff but lay off gamz ok

ROXY WHO REPLACED YOUR FUCKING BRAIN WITH A BLOCK OF CHEESE

ROXY YOU’RE MY FAVORITE CHARACTER PLEASE GIVE US AN EXPLANATION FOR WHY YOU’RE ACTING NOTHING LIKE THE COOL SMART PERSON WE READ ABOUT.

JADE: dave what the FUCK did you say to him downstairs?

Oh my god you asshole don’t blame DAVE for this >:(

ROXY: this time next week well corpse party like its the end of the world!

I don’t want to think this has anything to do with Aradia, but we DID see her in that postscript bit...  And, I mean, what the hell could she even do??  It’s not like this Roxy is just Aradia in really convincing cosplay or something.

==>

She leads John and Jake into the building and down the center of the nave, humming happily to herself the entire time. An equally effusive Calliope trails behind her, carrying a bouquet of purple flowers.

Well there’s Callie. What is WITH these hypnotized motherfuckers.  I need a revelation on these shenanigans STAT.

What is with people being bathed in light here?

each time we witness death, we fall in love in with the important people in oUr lives all over again.

Calliope is gazing at Roxy with glassy eyes. She sniffs as she plucks the last petal from her rose. A breeze washes through the cathedral from the crack in the door at the end of the room, brushing the petal off-course and causing it to get stuck in Roxy’s over-sprayed hair. Calliope reaches out with a visibly shaking hand to remove the plant offal, but she does not draw back. Instead, she lets her hand graze down the side of Roxy’s face and cup her cheek. Roxy puts her own hand over Callie’s and holds it.

Uhhh.... huh.

So.

If Roxy was just lying to herself, then............ WHY??????

John tilts his head and squints at the image in front of him. Hmm.

Is John realizing he’s in some sort of fanfic drawn by another character, hence all the people in serene lightbeams at tender but unjustified moments?

Everyone whips their heads around to see, of all people, Aradia hovering in the foyer

Pff

(...I hope Aradia didn’t come here, like, from the postscript.  Where the “action” she talked about might have just been this corpse party.  Because that would be pretty fucking lame.)

KARKAT: MAYBE FUCKING NEPETA IS ABOUT TO POUNCE FROM BEHIND THAT GROTESQUE STATUE OF THE HUMAN SUFFERER T-POSING OVER THERE.

Pfffffffffff

The description of Human Jesus we all had in our hearts, but were too afraid to voice.

Alright, now we see the body we took our eyes off of.  Is it going to get back up, or did it escape earlier?

since nobody was willing to dislodge the huge, otherworldly shard from her chest

My damn god, people.

...alright finally, everyone’s talking.

JANE: Agreed. I’ve always felt that Kanaya has done an exemplary job of providing a model for compassionate, empathetic behavior, which others of her kind would do well to follow.

JANE STOP BEING A XENOPHOBIC BASTARD

CALLIOPE: please. roxy gathered yoU all here for a reason. CALLIOPE: at least listen Until the end. CALLIOPE: after that yoU can argUe all you want.

...Huh.  Huuuuhh.  What the fuck is all this for.  Are you saying ROXY caused this? Or...?

Okay I like this reinforcement she’s making in her speech about how different changes can influence how all of this unfolds, gives me hope that maybe these two cliffhangers aren’t all we’re going to be left with and we’ll be able to at least think of an IMPLIED future different from them if we wanted to like we thought about the seemingly-infinite-possibility original ending of Homestuck that I’d rather have been stuck with than this oh god breathe boots

okay there’s the labor going into good distraction

alright corpse get back up

JADE: i am not jade.

Right, so like the black eyes in the postscript suggested this is more just a... vessel for alt!Calliope now?  To give HER a future beyond the one she sacrificed for that black hole business?  And between alt!Callie’s became-the-black-hole nature and Jade’s Spacey Green Sun connection that’s been singularified, she has access to cool Black Hole powers?  And is gonna do cool shit with them in implied future adventures we won’t see while Aradia gleefully watches the carnage?  Huh.

The congregation watches her go, but no one moves to help her, or even looks in her direction. In her wake, she leaves a primal, echoing wail.

Oh my god why wouldn’t they have just a brief discussion or something IT’S NOT THAT BAD  D:

JADE: and while i cannot say the same thing for the rest of you, JADE: i, at least, am exactly where i am meant to be.

Well fuck.  So she just disconfirmed this timeline as... something.  Relevant, possible, I dunno.

JADE: and i have entered this body to protect your world.

Okay that’s good.  So thanks to alt!Calliope these side timelines where things unfolded differently MAY be preserved.  Pretty fitting given alt!Callie’s origins.

.......unless there’s some other stupid interspecies civil war threat that she’s going to be fighting too, here, when the political situation falls apart.  Dammit.

==>

Terezi talk Terezi talk

-- JOHN EGBERT sent TEREZI PYROPE the photo “ghostrain.jpg” --

TEREZI: WH4T TH3 4CTU4L FUCK JOHN: it started a few days ago. the sky above the capital of the troll kingdom just cracked open and ghosts began raining down everywhere.

Oh my GOD.  So alt!Callie kind of “saved” all the doomed ghosts that got swallowed up in the black hole by redirecting them all to THIS UNIVERSE and timeline???????

That’s pretty interesting!  Heck my stomach’s even calming down!

they can’t even be judges! TEREZI: G4SP

Yeah that’s pretty terrible!

...yep, the resistance WOULD put him in charge.  I had a feeling it may have ended up in that direction in Candy since it wasn’t in Meat.

--oh FUCK YOU Jade for splitting up what he had with Karkat before they could sort it out!!! You did the OPPOSITE OF HELP and neither of them are going to end up happy thanks to you! D:<

PFFF wow, John’s so concerned about babby not!Tavros’s living situation that he’s considering legit kidnapping.  That means things must be pretty fucking bad.

--okay Calliope’s still out and about with Roxy instead of being cooped up in her room like in the other timeline, that’s good.

Pff, trying to redeem Ghost Eridan in front of Ghost Feferi.  Yep, that’s Gamzee.

GAMZEE: fIrSt, A LiTtLe RiGhTeOuS sPlAsH oF tHe NaNnA nEcTaR tO cLeAnSe ThAt DaNkNeSs FrOm YoUr SoUlS...

Gamzee takes out a baby bottle and flicks it, covering them both with little drops of milk, as clergy does with holy water. He then takes a swig from the bottle himself before returning it to his codpiece.

Jesus.  Fucking.  Christ.

I don’t want to believe that what’s in that bottle is what he’s making it sound like it is, but OF COURSE it is.  Why would it be anything else.  I bet there’s not even any Lifey hypnosis going on, it’s just the literal stuff.

The crowd falls silent as they raise their heads to watch a drone ship pass by overhead.

Jegus fuck stop going whole hog condesce janey

ROXY: lmao you worry too much ROXY: janeys got her head on straight shell show you yet

ROXY.  WHERE DID YOUR BRAIN GO.  I MISS IT.  YOUR BRAIN WAS THE BEST FUCKING PART OF YOU.

Touching photo.

Alright lemme post split.  I haven’t gotten as far as the last post plowed through since I’ve been typing so much... ah well.

[lovemeblueblog]

Loud neighbours and bickering brothers

Pairing: Loki x You as flirting friends

Summary: Basically, a one shot of this post.

Warnings: None.

Word count: 1,322

A/N: This should have been up a long time ago, like, in November, but I just haven’t had the time or the insparation to sit and write the idea down. So, yeah, better late than never, right? I promised to tag @dark-night-sky-99, and I’m so sorry it took me this long to post, but I hope you enjoy! ;)

An argument reached your ears as soon as you opened the front door. You couldn’t quite understand what the voices were saying, but it was definitely unmistakable who’s voices they were. And since nobody else except the two godly brothers were staying at your place, it was obvious that you had to deal with yet another little crisis. Nontheless, the Friday night had you in a good mood: no more work till Monday, no going out in the cold, no more creepy strangers in the subway, at least for two days. Ordering in some food and then curling up with a blanket to read was all you had on your agenda. 

When you peeled the layers of warmth from you and before going into the bathroom to wash your hands, you had shouted a quick hello in the direction of the kitchen, where they were bickering, but no response came. You sighed, thinking for a second if this is serious. Granted, you were no psychologist or a negotiator, but you were doing pretty good, when it came to dealing with the princes. That was probably the only reason why mister Tony Stark basically left them in your care, while the threats against the team were being handled and the base was getting fixed after explosion. Why he couldn’t place them in some hotel, you didn’t ask but thought that he and everybody else knew best in these kind of situations, unlike a translator who mainly worked with miss Potts. She agreed with the decision of keeping a low profile, and you trusted her, not giving it a second thought. The apartment was big, anyway, and sometimes it grew too quiet and lonely, even for someone who enjoys silence. So it was a bit better with the disputes than nothing at all. 

«Brother, listen to me,» Thor’s words reach you as you come to stand near the doorway, «This is madness!»

«I think you’re a bit exaggerating. It is merely a joke.» he chuckled, waving the god of thunder off. 

«Ah, finally,» Thor notices you, «Someone who can reason with you and your nonsense ideas.»

«Hi,» you give out a nervous smile, «What’s happening, now?»

«He says,» the older god points at Loki’s chest, «That he wants to kill the man that lives upstairs.»

«Oh no, Loki,» you mockingly scoff him, realizing what’s going on. The trickster smirks at you, and probably at the fact that Thor has no idea what you two had planned.

«Yes, see brother, you cannot do that!» 

«He knows that,» you come closer to the man in green, «Cause we gotta torture that little prick first.»

«My girl,» Loki blows you a kiss, and you try your best not to melt because of his behavior.

«What?» Thor’s eyebrows rise up, his face growing confused.

«What?» you say as if nothing’s the matter, «He is. He’s been playing music again all night yesterday. You were out, you didn’t hear how annoyingly loud it was in here, even through two floors down.»

«But surely, that is not enough reason to hurt him?» 

«Like hell it isn’t. In two years nothing has changed, nobody cares. I’ve complained like a hundred times in hopes of saving my sanity…Anyway, I’ve got him now,» you pat Loki’s shoulder, «And we’re gonna go do a thing.»

«So, you planned this?» he is even more surprised, «You cannot be serious!»

«Why not, brother? It is a serious matter, if you think about it.» the trickster was still smirking, the whole thing amusing him maybe a bit too much. 

«Did you forget that we are in hiding, Loki?» the arms get crossed on his chest instantly. 

«I assure you, nobody would even hear his screaming and begging.» you know he’s teasing and you can’t help but giggle.

«Is this funny to you?» the god directs his anger at you now, «I think my brother’s presence has rubbed off on you in a very bad way.» 

«Oh, it’s rubbed off alright,» you bite your lip for a second, «Come on, Thor, we’re just playing. I’m not gonna kill anybody… I’ll leave that up to Loki.» 

The god of mischief laughs at his brother’s face, you join him. «I’m kidding! I’m kidding, Thor. No killings. But we are going, whether you like it or not.»

«Right now?» he sighs, probably tired of our antics. 

«Sure. I am not in the mood to listen to his crap of songs today.»

«Be nice,» he points his finger at you two, warning.

«We’re always nice. And so we must punish someone who’s been naughty.» you wink at him, wanting to get a reaction. He only shakes his head in what seems to be disappointment, «Oh, don’t act so high and mighty. It’s actually not a good look on you.»

«You know we can’t be getting into trouble, when we are in the middle of an attack.»

«No trouble, brother. Trust me,» Loki purrs, «Only a little fun.»

«A-ha, I can’t wait to shove his stupid guitar up his—»

«Hey, now!» Thor doesn’t let you finish. 

«Garbage. That’s what I was gonna say. Yeah, garbage.» you nod at your words, acting like you’re being very serious. 

«I can’t believe it. I thought you were just a sweet innocent maiden, when I first met you.» he’s shaking his head again, making you smile. 

«Oh, she is. Very sweet, but not so innocent,» Loki looks you straight in the eye when he says it, and you can’t keep your cheeks from blushing, «Come along, my little minx. We have much to do.»

He grabs your hand then, maneuvering your body so he can get you up on his back. A piggy back ride from a god? Well, that was definitely not on your bucket list. 

«Don’t pout, I’ll get the food that you like so much, after.» you shout at Thor on your way out. 

Keeping your hands tightly wrapped on Loki’s shoulders, you try not to think about his hands on your thighs, but you do notice a very particular and familiar smell that is coming from, apparently, his hair, «You smell good. Hey! Did you use my shampoo?»

«Hush,» is all he said, not confirming anything, before bending his knees to get into the elevator, when we got out of the flat, «Mind your head, darling.»

«So, what are we going to do, really?»

«We are going to gently remind him that the world does not revolve around his mortal ass and he should know his place from now on.» 

«Ohh, I can’t wait to see that. You think I can slap him? Just once?» Loki turns his head to look at you, one brow up, silently questioning, but not judging, «He’s been getting on my nerves since forever. I hate his stupid guts.»

He laughs, «Patience, pet. All in good time.»

You both get out of the lift and you point to the burgundy door on the left for him. The god rings the bell once, and then there is silence; your heart is beating out of my chest while we wait for the man inside to open up. You do hear some shuffling in a little while and after the second time he pushes the bell button, loud swearing. The door creaks and a disheveled head peeks out.

«What?!» he barks, not quite awake yet. 

«Howdy, neighbour!» you wave at him, the fake enthusiasm dripping from my words. 

«The hell you want, weirdos?» 

Loki lets you down then, and in the next moment, he pushes him in the chest, making the man stumble back and letting us inside. The owner is scared already. 

«That is no way to talk, dear neighbour,» he clatters his tongue at him and then his voice changes, becoming lower and much more intimidating, «Now, let’s teach you some manners, shall we?»

This is going to be so much fun, you think to yourself before closing the door, smiling wickedly. 

[tiberiusjeffersonkippen]

Dancing for You

Here’s Chapter 1 of my first fic! Sorry if it’s a little rough; I’m still figuring everything out. Thanks for reading! Also here on Ao3.

Summary: As Cyrus prepares a dance for his high school’s talent show, he finds himself entangled in a new friendship with none other than TJ Kippen, Grant High School’s resident jock. Only good things can come from new friends...right?

Words: 2098

Chapter 1

The music pumped through his veins. It crescendoed, and Cyrus no longer had any idea where he was with respective to anything else in the studio, much less the exact choreography he was dancing at the moment, but that didn’t really matter. All he could see was gleaming green eyes. All he could feel was smooth hands gripping his wrists. As the music ended, Cyrus collapsed on the floor, crying and wondering how he had gotten to this point.

(6 weeks earlier)

Cyrus’s chest heaved as he held his final pose and waited for the music to finish. To be quite honest, the dance wasn’t his best work. The first two minutes or so of choreography was pretty solid, but he ran out of time and had to rush the last bits of choreography that day, so it was pretty repetitive towards the end. But the judges (consisting of the principal and the two assistant principals) seemed to like it, and there was a heavy round of applause, so it must have been alright. Cyrus could even make out some people standing up (that was probably just Andi, Buffy, and Jonah, but it was still cool!). After the judges finished their remarks, he walked off stage to gulp down about 2 full bottles of water.

The talent show lasted for six more acts. Most of them were singers, but there was also a band, another dancer, and a guy who did killer impressions. Cyrus was particularly impressed with his Miss Piggy. Then the judges called all of the acts back on stage to commend everyone for performing.

“Remember to vote online for your favorite act! We’ll see eight of you back here in four weeks for finals! Good luck and good night!” said the principal. The lights rose and the audience began to meander to the auditorium doors. By the time Cyrus had collected his bag and water bottles from backstage, Andi, Buffy, and Jonah were waiting for him by the stage doors.

“That was amazing Cyrus! I can’t believe you’ve been holding out on us!” gushed Andi.

“Yeah, Cy-Guy! Since when do you dance?” asked Jonah.

“This is my fifteenth year.”

“Wait, how old are you again?”

“Buffy, we’ve been best friends with him for over 10 years!” interjected Andi.

“Yeah, but I wanted to make sure that I didn’t accidentally forget that he was immortal or something. You’ve really been dancing since you were two?” she responded.

“Well, I was three by the first recital, but yeah, I was two when I started. Didn’t you know that?” Cyrus said.

Buffy shrugged. “I guess I never really knew the specifics. I just knew that you’d been dancing since basically forever.”

“Well, Good-man and good girls, what do you say to celebratory milkshakes at the Spoon?” said Jonah.

“Well there’s nothing to celebrate yet since I haven’t been voted through, but who am I to say no to milkshakes?”

Cyrus rode with Andi, and Buffy rode with Jonah. The creative car beat the athletic car, and Cyrus went inside to secure the good booth while Andi called her mom to let her know where she was. She came back right after Cyrus ordered their baby taters and milkshakes (vanilla for Andi and chocolate for the rest of them), joined by Buffy and Jonah and a bouquet of flowers.

“We would have given them to you earlier, but we didn’t trust ourselves to keep them intact through the entire show,” said Andi as Buffy handed him the flowers.

“You guys really didn’t have to get me flowers! I wasn’t that good, and besides it was only the prelims!”

“Yes we did! It’s not like we could’ve made you posters like you do for Buffy’s basketball games or organized snacks like you do for the Space Otters, so we did the next best thing,” said Jonah, sliding into the booth across from Cyrus.

“Whatever, I probably won’t be put through anyway.”

“Shut up! Yes you will!” said Andi.

Cyrus would’ve argued further, but their milkshakes arrived at that moment.

“Vanilla milkshake?” asked the waitress.

“That’s me!” Andi exclaimed as Buffy rolled her eyes.

“You have got to be kidding me. Vanilla isn’t even a flavor!” Buffy said while helping pass Cyrus and Jonah their drinks.

“Yes it is! It’s the flavor of sweetness and deliciousness!” Andi shot back.

Cyrus settled back into his seat. He had heard this same argument at least a thousand times. Buffy maintained that vanilla barely had any more flavor than water. Andi disagreed. At this point, a trip to their favorite milkshake-and-baby-tater spot wasn’t complete without a new iteration of the debate. Still, Cyrus enjoyed it. Their friendly banter allowed him to relax.

Until he spilled his milkshake, that is.

“You are definitely the clumsiest dancer I know,” said Buffy while Cyrus groaned and tried to blot the milkshake off of his shirt.

“Shut up. Yeah, I’m definitely going to need use water on this. Be right back,” Cyrus responded as he scooted past Andi to head to the bathroom.

Fortunately for Cyrus, the milkshake was surprisingly easy to clean up. He was in the bathroom for no more than four minutes, and he was about to head back to his table when he heard a toilet flush. He looked up to see none other than TJ Kippen staring right back at him in the mirror. Cyrus didn’t know anything about TJ other than that he was in his history class and that he was the source of Buffy’s hatred for male jocks, but he suspected that nothing good could come of this interaction.

“Hey, aren’t you that guy that danced in the talent show?” asked TJ. So he’s going the “fein interest” route Cyrus thought to himself.

“Y-yeah,” he said out loud, and, in a moment of unprecedented confidence, he added “You got a problem with that?”

“No, not at all!” TJ chuckled, as if he found the idea of having a problem with Cyrus ridiculous. “I just think it’s interesting that you keep so much to yourself in class but you’re willing to dance in front of the entire school.”

“It wasn’t the entire school! And how do you know enough about me to even make that judgement? You started off this entire conversation with ‘Aren’t you that guy?’ It sounds to me like you don’t even know who I am!”

“You’re in my history class.” When a look of confusion passed over Cyrus’s face, TJ continued. “What? You can’t honestly tell me you never noticed.”

“No, I know that you’re in my class. I just didn’t think you knew that. You’re a pretty aloof guy.”

“Well history just happens to be the one class I pay attention in.”

“Are you telling me that TJ Kippen, Grant’s resident stoic jock, is a history nerd?”

“I didn’t say that! … But yes, I am. Don’t go spreading it around! The last thing I need is having my reputation ruined by some smallfry that danced in the talent show.”

Growing, more confident by the minute, Cyrus responded with “Aw, and just as we were getting to be friends!”

TJ didn’t necessarily growl, per se, but he was intimidating enough to make Cyrus quickly add on “But you have my word! I will not go around ruining your reputation. Even if I think you’re being ridiculous.”

For a moment Cyrus thought TJ was going to say that that wasn’t enough and demand that he somehow remove that particular piece of information from his brain, but then he sighed and said “Thank you,” which threw Cyrus for a second before he moved on to another question that had been brewing in his mind since he first saw TJ in the bathroom.

“So what are you doing here anyway? I don’t think I saw any of your friends out there.”

“I’m just picking up Amber. She gets off work in five minutes.”

“Oh, are you two dating?” Cyrus really did not care about TJ’s answer, but he figured he had to do his duty as Andi’s friend.

“God no,” TJ groaned. “Why does everyone ask us that? Can no one get it through their thick skulls that we’re fucking siblings!”

“Wait, she’s your sister?”

“Yes, unfortunately. And,” TJ said, pulling out his phone, “apparently she got off a little early. See ya later, Underdog.”

“Bye TJ--wait, what did you call me?” Cyrus asked, but TJ had already left the bathroom. Sighing, Cyrus dabbed at his shirt one last time before returning to his baby taters (and his friends, but his taters were more important).

“What took you so long?” Jonah asked as Cyrus slid back into the booth.

“Yeah, what exactly were you doing in that bathroom, Cyrus?” Buffy added.

“Oh, TJ Kippen was here to pick up Amber and he was in the bathroom and we ended up having an...interesting conversation.”

“Wait, is TJ dating Amber?” Andi interjected.

“You don’t have to worry about TJ stealing your girlfriend Andi,” Cyrus responded.

“She’s not my girlfriend!”

“But you want her to be,” teased Cyrus. “Apparently they’re siblings. Not sure why no one seems to know that.”

“Anyway,” said Buffy, steering the discussion back to Cyrus’s conversation in the bathroom, “What did you guys talk about? Why were you guys talking in the first place?”

“To be completely honest, I have no idea. He asked if I was ‘that guy that danced in the talent show,’” Cyrus said with air quotes.

“Did he mess with you? I swear to God-”

“No, Buffy, stop! He was actually pretty cool about it, and then I learned that he’s a huge his-” Cyrus paused, remembering TJ’s almost-threat about ruining his reputation. “He’s a huge Hiss Hiss fan.”

“Hiss Hiss?” Andi asked.

“Yeah, apparently it’s some indie emo band or something.”

“That sounds like total bs,” Buffy said. Cyrus just shrugged. “Fine, keep your secrets. Is that all that happened?”

“Yeah. He got text from Amber saying that she was done early, and then he left, but then as he was leaving he called me some name. I think it was Underdog? I’m not really sure. He left before I could ask.”

“I wonder what that’s about,” said Andi.

“Me too. I guess I’ll find out tomorrow in history.”

“I didn’t know he was in any of your classes,” said Jonah.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t have expected him to be in AP US History,” Buffy added.

“I guess everyone’s got their secrets,” said Cyrus. “Well, now that the baby taters and shakes are gone, I guess it’s unfortunately time to go home. Don’t make that face, Andi! We need to sleep!”

“Fine,” she grumbled. “Do you need a ride, Cy?”

“Nah, it’s nice out, and my house is only ten minutes from here.”

“Okay. Bye everyone!”

In usual Good Hair Crew (and Jonah) fashion, it took ten minutes for everyone to say goodbye and get out the door. When Cyrus finally started his walk home, the cool breeze was a breath of fresh air. As much as he loved his friends, they got to be a little overbearing at times. Who cares if he and TJ Kippen exchanged a few words in the bathroom?

I care, thought a tiny piece of his mind, but, as it made no sense, Cyrus elected to ignore it. Instead, he plugged in his earbuds and started to choreograph a new dance. If he was put through, maybe he’d use it for the finals. The song was only about three minutes long, and it varied enough to allow Cyrus to use lots of different moves. Before long, Cyrus was turning and jumping home as much as he was walking, and he was still dancing when he reached his front door eight minutes later.

“How was the talent show, honey? I’m so sad I had to miss it,” his mom called from the dining room.

“Mom, it’s fine! I told, you, it was only the preliminary round!”

“I know, sweetie, I just love watching you dance so much!”

“Thanks, Mom. I’m pretty tired though, so I think I’m going to go to bed now.”

“Of course. You can tell me all about it in the morning.”

Cyrus practically sleep-walked his way to bed, barely registering his toothbrush and sink and pajamas as he used each to prepare for bed. However, just before finally drifting off to sleep, there was one very clear image in his mind: TJ chuckling. What’s that all about? Cyrus wondered, but he didn’t have time to answer his own question before falling completely asleep.

[lovemesomesurveys]

When you get an account for something, what’s the first username you try? I’d rather not share that. What do you think might be someone else’s first impression of you? Awkward, shy, quiet, standoffish. Is texting having a negative or a positive effect for social relationships? It has its good and bad points. One of the bad things is that it’s SO easy for misunderstandings. What you say doesn’t always come off the way you intended it to.  Would you be okay with a friend wanting to date one of your exes? I think I’d have some issue with that. Have you ever been addicted to something other than a drug? The internet? Have you ever been addicted to a drug? I mean, after being on pain medications for so long my body developed a dependency. That’s just going to happen. 

Do you like macadamia nut cookies? I like how there’s usually white chocolate chips in them, but I don’t like the nuts. Just give me white chocolate chip cookies, ha.

What kind of accent do people typically have where you’re from? Californian one? It’s weird to think of myself as having an accent. It’s not distinguishable like a southern one or someone from like Boston. Bruno Mars- fail or win? I like a lot of his music.  Can you sleep without a fan on? Absolutely not during the summer. This summer I have 3 that are always going. Even during the winter I sometimes still have 1 on.  Does history interest you at all? Yeah. What’s something you wish you could do-over? A lot of things. How many times a day do you apply deoderant? If it’s a really hot day and I’m out and about for some reason, I may need to apply a couple times or so. Otherwise, once tends to do the job. Have you ever tried any drugs? Just weed. What caused the most intense physical pain you’ve ever felt? After any of my surgeries. Do you like those Sperry Top-Sider shoes? Sure. I actually had a pair of cute plaid ones once. Can you wear shoes like that without getting blisters on your ankles? I don’t have that issue. Would you agree that dark chocolate tastes like rotten chocolate? I don’t think it tastes rotten, but I don’t like it.  Do you touch your lips when you’re nervous? Yeah, I pick at and bite them. Do you think you can read other people’s body language well? I think I usually can pick up on that stuff. Are you a good driver? I don’t drive. Did you pass your driver’s test the first time you took it? I haven’t taken it. Would you rather be involved in a watergun or a paintball gun war? Neither. Is your hair in layers or is it all the same length? It was layered, but it’s been so long since I got a trim that it’s almost all one length now. Is there anyone who you’re afraid to be in a car with, if they’re driving? No. What’s a quick fix for a bad hair day? A hat. Do you enjoy flying or do you get scared? I was very scared, but taking off and landing are definitely the worst of it. Once you’re in the air it’s fine, unless there’s bad turbulence. I’ve only flown a total of 2 times and that was over 10 years ago, so I’d definitely be nervous. It’d feel like the 1st time all over again. I’d probably be nervous every time even if I was a frequent flier let’s be real. Be honest. Do you like making other people feel jealous? No. I admit that I played stupid games like that before, though. SO stupid. Have you ever purposely made someone of the opposite sex jealous? Yes. :/ ^^^ Are you addicted to shopping? Kind of. My online shopping sometimes gets out of hand. Do you always wear mascara and eyeliner? I very rarely wear makeup at all anymore. It’s been quite awhile since the last time. Do you have any huge hoodies lined with snuggly fur on the inside? No. I have in the past. Is there anything you do, kind of habitually, that’s completely mindless but helps you think? Probably picking at my nails, biting my lips, or messing with my hair. Not sure if that made a whole hell of a lot of sense… It did. Do you like headphones or ear-buds more? Earbuds.  What’s your favorite winter sport? None. I don’t like any sports. What’s something you’re very good at? Nothing. Where do you spend the majority of your summer? At home. Who do you usually spend the most of your summer with? My family, who I spend most of my time with everyday. How old were you and where did you go on your first real date? I was in my early 20s and we went to a movie and dinner. Have you ever had a bonfire on the beach at night? No, but that’s something I’ve always wanted to do. Do you like sour gummy worms? No. I don’t sour things, it irritates my mouth. Have you ever helped a complete stranger with anything? Yes. Would you pick up a hitchhiker if they seemed harmless? Nooo. You never know for sure. They might seem harmless, but no one looks like a serial killer or something unless they have a mask on or a weapon of some kind in their hand like Michael Myers himself was standing there. People like Ted Bundy seemed harmless.  When playing a sport, are you more focused on winning or having fun? I don’t play sports.  Who’s the last person who gave you a piggy back ride? Probably my dad. I haven’t had a piggy ride since I was a kid. Who’s the last person that you gave a piggy back ride? I’m guessing my dad. Rock, paper, or scissors? Rock. Would you be bothered if your boyfriend liked to bite you? I mean, depends? Are you any good at dancing? No. Even if you aren’t, do you like to dance? I like to bob my head or tap my fingers a bit. Sometimes move my arms a little. What makes you feel the most ‘alive’? I’ve felt like a zombie for years. Who’s conversations do you appreciate the most? Ones with my loved ones. Ty and I had the best conversations, too. I miss those. Is there anyone’s advice you value enough to take against your own judgment?  I don’t know, it would really depend on the issue. How often do you get the opportunity to be completely alone? Often enough usually. Do you like being alone or does it drive you crazy? I like spending some time alone. I need to. I don’t like being completely alone for a long time, though. Like, I may just be in my room, but my family is home ya know? Do you have a trampoline? No. Do you get nervous when driving in convertibles, knowing that if you flipped, you’d be screwed? I’ve never ridden in one. What’s your favorite Pixar movie? Toy Story. Are you capable of successfully lying to someone you love? I have before and sometimes still do about certain things. There’s also things I’ll downplay or choose not to omit. I’m not a habitual or compulsive liar, though. Who do you adore? My doggo.

[tessatechaitea]

New Titans #112

Don't you worry your pretty little head about Red Star's right leg.

I keep trying to organize my life so that I can read more actual books (as opposed to comic books which I'm not judging. I'm just differentiating) without having to sacrifice any of the other things I enjoy doing. What that generally means is that I wind up reading about ten pages every morning before going to bed (I work nights!). Which realistically means I need to do improve my time management if I'm going to be serious about reading. I have managed to read the first "book" of Alan Moore's Jerusalem but it's taken me a fucking long time to do it. I thought it would take me a long time because I was expecting a difficult read but I'm finding it enjoyable. Plus by the time I've finished, I'm fairly certain I'll be able to navigate Northampton with ease. I'm also wondering if all the descriptions of the characters' movements through the city are an encoded treasure map! Or, being that Alan Moore wrote it, it's more likely a spell to summon some sex demons. While organizing (and by organizing, I mean the main definition of organizing: moving shit around in a way that makes you feel like you're accomplishing something but really you're just engaging in an activity to forget about your mortality for awhile. Plus you can generally get some really fucking good dusting done), I managed to place all of the books from various book shelves that I have yet to finish reading (or that I simply want to reread) on the top shelf of the row of bookcases in my office. Jerusalem is first on that list followed by some books by high school friends (Rogue's Curse by Jason Beymer and Soy Rakelson's children's books that I'm willing to bet everything I own as well as my life and my mother's life on that they're black and white morality tales with a super conservative and possibly Ayn Randian view of the world). After that is There Is No Year which Doom Bunny gave me because it's supposedly a terrible book that I'm not sure he even finished and which I wanted to make fun of (but, hey, maybe I'll love it!) and the rest: Inside the Yellow Submarine, Trixie Belden Mystery-Quiz Book #1, Don Quixote, Gravity's Rainbow, Lost in the Funhouse (reread!), A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, And the Ass Saw the Angel (by Nick Cave!), King's The Wind Through the Keyhole (A Dark Tower book!), Crime and Punishment, Hey Nostradamus!, The Best of H.P. Lovecraft, The Lore and Language of Schoolchildren, The Boomer Bible (re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-read), Six Volumes of The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night (finished with one and a half volumes after owning this set for twenty five years!), The Holy Bible (currently reading for my Patreon), The Norton Anthology of Modern Poetry (Second Edition) (because I need poetic context for the 20th century!), Only Revolutions, The Exegesis of Philip K. Dick, and The Familiar (currently just book one but there's going to be like nine hundred of them, so maybe I won't even bother!). Oh, and I just added We Learn Nothing (reread) and I Wrote This Book Because I Love You, both by Tim Kreider. I'll probably start with those because funny essays are easier to get through than anything by Dostoevsky, Danielewski, Pynchon, Cervantes, Barth, Joyce, or Sakelson! I mean Rakelson! Oh man. Rakelson would have a stroke if he knew I listed his name with all those postmodern authors! Not that they're all postmodern. You can figure out which ones are and aren't on your own. I'm busy reading New Titans #112 which must be good since Starfire is naked on the cover. Okay, almost naked. She is wearing a dickie and a belt. I know a lot of you just skipped that big paragraph while thinking, "Oh, la dee da! What a fancy book reader you are! Fucking virtue signaler! Or whatever the term for listing or showing off your reading list full of classic literary texts is! Seems like virtue signaler works well enough! Better even than what idiotic fuck nuggets use it for on Twitter anyway!" But maybe you missed the part about how those are books I haven't been able to get through yet! I've owned some of these books for over a decade! And I didn't even put The Collected Works of Gertrude Stein on this shelf because do I need to be reminded that I used that book more as an address book than something to read? Although I carried it with me everywhere I went for a year or two (which is why it's full of phone numbers and addresses!). And I really did want to read it. I didn't carry it around so people could think, "Look at him with that book! Who the fuck is Gertrude Stein? What a ponce!" Although to be fair, I did leave off a few books on my "to-read" shelf! But it wasn't because they weren't smart enough sounding! It's because they were comic books and also pornography and also also fucking hilarious.

One of my friends in the state department who learns a brand new language every four years or so bonded with me over Oglaf last time he visited. He was all, "I'm glad I know somebody I can share my love of Oglaf with and not be looked at like a completely demented perv!" Although I do look at him like he's a completely demented perv, I didn't need to admit it to his face!

I embrace my delusion that readers merely skipped "one" paragraph of my comic book "reviews"! This issue is called "A New Home" and my brain continued to add to that title with "o-erotic Journey." Mostly because of this panel:

Fairly certain "bamming" a baby is illegal, even in space.

The Titans (and I use that term loosely since the characters encompassed by that shorthand are Changeling, Red Star, Pantha, Baby, and Starfire) have been stranded on The Terraist's space station. That name probably could use a hyphen so you don't first read it as terRAIST twelve times thinking "What the fuck does that mean?" before your brain finally sees the God-awful pun and you give up, finally letting go of that last gossamer thread that's been connecting you to the reality you just discovered doesn't fucking matter. How can there be any meaning to existence when an editor greenlights the name "Terraist"? I'm sure Wolfman's pitch contained at least two dozen "Get it?!"s. Anyway, maybe most readers never even noticed, shrugging their shoulders at every single moment in which a comic book doesn't make sense because at least Starfire is practically naked throughout the last few issues! I have a theory that most people don't really absorb much of what they're reading in comic books. They tend to just love a character for some magic reason and stick with loving that character no matter what terrible writer winds up writing them. And at that point, they just ignore plot holes and inconsistencies and terrible dialogue and whatever the fuck Ann Nocenti does with her typewriter. They simply go star-eyed and gape lovingly at the drawn images of Dick Grayson's throbbing buttocks. That was a hypothetical sentence and not a memoir. Here's a panel with evidence that might lead to proof of my theory if I could actually interview anybody who read this comic book in 1994 and ask them, "Did you even notice this panel?" To which they would all probably respond, "No, I was distracted by the opposite page where you can see tons of Starfire's side-boob and I think one of her outer labia." Um, anyway, the panel I mentioned:

Damn, Marv. Beyond the Forest was nearly fifty years old at the time this comic came out.

To be fair to Wolfman and Changeling, I did an Internet search on "Whatta dump" (and, yes, I spelled it differently than Marv did) and the first hit was video of the scene where Bette Davis says the line. What's odd is that she delivers it flatter and straighter than anything I would have expected out of Bette Davis's eyes...I mean mouth. Gar's rendition of it is terrible! The way Bette says it, I would never think to spell it any way but "What a dump." But that's not the point! The point is how is "What a dump!" a immortal words?! Granted, you're probably now thinking to yourself, "Well, how did X and Y and Z become oft-quoted movie lines?!" (where X and Y and Z are actual phrases from movies and not just letters. But I'm not psychic so how should I know what terrible oft-quoted movie lines you were thinking of? Mine would have been "Seven schools in seven states and the only different is my locker combination" or "William H. Bonny. You are not a god?" "Why don't you pull the trigger and find out?" or "Ziggy Piggy! Ziggy Piggy! Ziggy Piggy! Ziggy Piggy!") I suppose one can't help what phrases the zeitgeist picks up on. According to the YouTube video of Bette Davis, "What a dump" is Bette's famous bitchy line from that movie I'd never heard of. I guess I just haven't traveled in the right circles! Although I have heard the phrase "What a dump!" Has everybody in the world been quoting Bette Davis all this time and I just didn't know it?! Was this movie the first time that phrase was ever uttered?! To think I could have known all of this if I hadn't been distracted by Starfire's side-boob and — I'm fairly certain — one of her outer labia. To shut Gar up, Starfire admits that she doesn't remember any of them and then she punches Pantha in her vagina.

Starfire punching Pantha in the vagina is funnier than anything that Pantha has said in the last forty issues.

After punching Pantha in the vagina, Starfire knees Red Star in the balls for no reason. Unless the reason is that she's been wanting to do that for a long time and her pretend amnesia allows her this moment! I suppose I'd fake amnesia too to get away from being a Titan. I've been joking about seeing Starfire's outer labia but is this it? Is that one of those things?

Is my boner proof that it's her labia or is my boner proof that I'm a comic book reading virgin nerd?

I can't wait for everybody to message me telling me how that can't be her outer labia because that's not where it would be and anyway this photographic proof I'm sending you is what one looks like! Then I can actually them and say, "Well, you can't know that for sure! She's an alien and maybe her outer labia is fully engorged due to Pantha back-fucking her!" Also I'd really enjoy some of that photographic evidence!

This is not what I would do with those photographs.

Garfield turns into another monster because he can't do birds and rhinos anymore. He lies on top of Starfire and then reveals something that destroys every moment in DC canon where Garfield turned into a rhino to knock some hugely muscled bad guy on their ass. He tells Red Star, "Hey, I may be big and ugly but my mass doesn't change! I'm not as strong as she is!" Well fuck me! The whole concept of Beast Boy has been based on a huge lie! Or at least scientific principles that make the character utterly worthless. Why the fuck would he ever change into a huge beast if his mass doesn't change? Wouldn't he always change into something small and fast to be most effective?! This revelation is one of those moments where DC tries to make their universe more logical but only winds up fucking up the entire multiverse. Red Star and Changeling knock Starfire unconscious and then tie her up which probably isn't totally rapey at all, even if the artist draws it that way.

Yep. Everything is just fine here! Move along.

Meanwhile on Earth, Arsenal, Aqualad, and Flash consider a proposal from the United States government to get the Titans to work for them. They consider it over a couple waters at a local strip club named Ding Dong Daddy's." I mean, the comic book calls it a "retro club" but everybody either gets a private lap dance or laid. It's hard to tell what Marv Wolfman was going for with this scene. Proof that the young cool Titan men fuck? Proof that women are only to provide relief for men's sexual desires? Proof that Aqualad should maybe think twice before saying "Hey guys! We came together!" when women are throwing their vaginas at them?

How long does Aqualad think a lap dance takes?

Back in space while the reader was away, Red Star and Changeling have managed to put a gag on Starfire and tie her legs together. That makes things less rapey, right? If not, I'm sure Marv will improve the situation in a sensitive and professional manner!

Oh come on!

Starfire remembers everything while Changeling whines about how he didn't get to kiss Starfire while she was tied up and scared and beaten and suffering from amnesia. Poor kid! Maybe next time! After regaining her memory, Starfire says, "X'hal! That was dick I saw in South America!" and I snicker like a twelve year old. The first decision Starfire makes after regaining her memory is that she and Dick should get their marriage annulled, if it even took which I'm pretty sure it didn't. If you were a fan of reading the letters pages, whoever the letter answer person was constantly kept pointing out that they couldn't be married because the priest blew up before he could say they were man and wife. But now Wolfman provides more evidence like how no paper work was filed and nobody signed anything (although don't you sign the papers before the ceremony?) Anyway, they're not married and probably never will be if the last twenty five years of reading comic books has taught me anything!

Snicker!

Baby has an idea to use The Terraist's satellite as their new headquarters and the government is all, "Okay! But you have to work with us on a minimum number of yearly missions!" And Roy Harper is all, "That number is zero!" And the government is all, "Yes sir! What a deal! We will pay you a salary, give you the satellite, and get nothing in return! Let's shake on it!"

Who the fuck is wearing The Flash's costume?! First appearance of New 52 Wally West?

The epilogue reveals Raven needs to rape the Titans so that they'll all give birth to Trigon's children. So it should be a fun few final issues before either this comic book was cancelled or I finally recovered my sanity and simply stopped buying it. New Titans #112 Rating: B. It was all kinds of stupid but I enjoyed making fun of it!