#but we’re the butt of the joke bc it’s okay to hate on US

[jewishbarbies]

when cis gay men & cis lesbian women open their insecure mouths to be biphobic and ugly (& transphobic if you keep scrolling)

[stupd000]

My typed reaction of Vegas BA bc everyone’s asleep

I love the guy who checks us in

Oh um don’t call me pet

Ermmmmm

Okay don’t like it so far

aw shucks i missed you too boo

no i will not come closer

ew no go away

oh nvm ig we are

wait so are we the dog or is he

okay this is getting boring

can we fuck now

oh wait nvm this is hot

oh WE’RE the puppy

that’s um

okay

is he calling me special

no i’m not ready to play VEGA.

i have a feeling we’re not alone

or we are

idk

okay we got some vouyers

that’s erm

okay

don’t call me pet

weirdo

excitement? no honey i’m scared

yes fear

ok can we fuck now

damn he talks a lot

stop echoing

oh don’t call me pup

oh this is some like

kinky kinky shit

how big is Vega

just in general cuz i thought he was like

6,1 and scrawny

um no my breath is oxygen not yours

this is definitely um

yeah

correct circumstances?

wardrobe?? bitch what is this Narnia

DONT CALL ME A PUPPY THATS WEIRD

i’m kink shaming

I am not getting on all fours what the fuck

oh nvm ig we are

this is uncomfortable

TAIL????

this is some furry shit

UM ..!

NO I WILL NOT CRAWL

WHATTTTTT

ASS?

SLUT???

this would be hot if i wasn’t a fucking dog

don’t shush me bitch

are we still on all fours

that’s mad embarrassing

i am not yours

weirdo

I’d rather you not take care of me

this is very um

interesting!!

Do we have dignity

STOP CALLING ME PUPPY YOU FURRY

do we have any pride at all like oh my god

GRINDING???

Don’t slut shame me bitch

arching????????

oh my god.

CUM HUNGRY LITTLE BITCH????

if he says puppy one more time i’m killing myself

if he puts a fucking collar on me i’ll jump

stop

STOPPP

Dog tag is crazy

“property of vega” NO.

Stop vega this is not a joke

DO WE HAVE NO SENSE OF DIGNITY

OH MY GODDDD

PROUD??? I AM NOT PROUD

OWNER???

I’m jumping off a ledge

MY HOLE?? WHICH ONE I HAVE LIKE 3

Okay stop slut shaming me Vega

ROLL OVER???

i’m insanely uncomfortable

by the way guys i made chicken alfredo today

Anyway

i hate his fucking tone

don’t take that attitude w me bitch

DO NAWTTT CALL ME A WHORE EVER AGAIN.

oh wait he called me pretty nvm

this is insane

it’s 2:30 am i cannot handle this

okay so we archin

PUT WHAT IN

WHAT IS GOING IN

this is strange

CALLING UR DICK A TREAT IS WILDDD

oh my god no

stop.

A TAIL???

NO

NO NO NO NO

NO

NO

no wait cuz there was this one kid who wore a butt plug tail to school it was crazy bc a guy pulled it out

anyway

This is some furry shit

not that there’s anything wrong w that live ur truth

STRETCHING???

the plug is insane

stop

i’m actually sobbing this is NOT OKAY.

what position are they in im so confused

SHAKE WHAT ASS

UMMMMMMMMM

this is peculiar

Vega is a furry

i hate this

i hate this sm

I STILL HAVE 10 MINS LEFT

LORD SAVE ME

okay no need to take that tone Vega😒

bitch we can’t breathe wtf

no i wont whine around that tootsie roll u call a dick

AHHH THE NOISESSS

okay can u not choke me

don’t call me a slut you cunt

oh my god hurry up vega

ew

I don’t love anything about this

this is insane

NOT A PERSON????

RUDEEEEEEEE

okay adjective king

ew don’t call me that

i am not licking the floor sir

i am not licking your boot either

lick your own fucking boot

this is actually pissing me off he’s annoying

are we almost done

Do we have no sense of shame

like at all

second hand embarrassment

okay are we done

no? okay

ew don’t call ur self master

that’s not..

okay

um

the growling is insane

damn right i’m divine

ew don’t call the that

not the baby voice

stop this madness

what do you want from me WHAT DO U WANNTTTT

okay are we done

TWITCHING?????? INSANE.

That was horrible

[bubblyqueer000]

APRIL FOOLS JOKE POST Mondo Owada x Me PART 3!! THE FUCKENING :0

soz I haven't been posting. I'll make an update soon C:

still tho gotta do my yearly april fools day post!!

FUCKING SHIT WIENER COCK DOODLE!! HEY DICK NOSES IT’S BUBZ CHAN AND IM MAD. RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHDFNNJHBNJHBGBHNJHBGVHNHBVGBNBHHB

Okay so like last year that little cock weasel, monocumstain killed my boyfriend, mondo because he was mad he commited a hate crime and fucked me on the tables in the cafeteria, coating them in his dick cheese in the process. UGGGGHH

BUT ACTUALLY I WAS THE ONE WHO WAS REALLY PUNISHED BECAUSE I WAS THE ONE TASKED WITH SCRAPING HIS SMEGMA OFF OF EVERY SURFACE OF THE SCHOOL!!!! >:C

I was in the midst of using a metal spatula to scrape off his dried up mondo butter from under the tables when I felt a horrible pain filling my chest.

“Ow tf” I sayed

“Shut the fuck up” said Kyoto

“No you cunt, my stomach really hurts.”

“Well no shit we’re all like a million years old now and during that whole time mondo was fuckin destroying your organs.” Said toastermi

“…

��

Shit u right.” And then I felt another horrible fucking pain in my tummy!!! “AHHHHHHFHDNDNBDNDJDNDND NO YOU BITCHES IDK WHATS HAPPENING”

“maybe u need a nap c: “ Nina told me

“YOU DONUT SUCKING FUCK WAD HELP ME.” 

“DON’T WORRY YALL I GOT THIS!” Said sakura, kicking me as hard as she could in the stomach making my organs squirt out of my ass with a loud shlorp. 

“OH SHIT IN THE SINK GET HER TO THE SINK!” Shouted byakuya bc he thought it was my period and he was scared of periods and stuf. 

So yea soccer ball carried me over her shoulder into the kitchen and plopped me in the sink where I screamed and farted loudly lmfao. I really hope that no one actually gets turned on by this dear fucking god. 

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” idk how birth works soz. 

So yeah I shitted out a bb. 

“What the fuck” Said everyone collectively. 

“Goo goo ga ga 😀” He goo goo ga gad

“HOW THE SHIT DID THIS HAPPEN?” 

“Because you had tons of unprotected sex with mondo.”

“Oh yeah ur right. Alright well… Idk ummm ill name u mondo after ur dad ig.”

“otay” he said bc that’s how babies talk according to fan fic writers wtf is wrong with you people??

“Acutually you can;t lol” said byakuya smartily. “Bc if u did that everytime you called him that hed think of how u fucked his dad or some shit.”

“Byakuya what the actual fuck. I don’t think you understand the absurdity of what you just said. Not only is that sexualizing my infant son, but it’s also an incredibly perverse interpretation of a healthy relationship based on love and respect, and now that he’s passed us on, it’s all the more insensitive.” I told him and everyone started clapping. I looked at the fuckin kid and thought and thought. “Wait wat was mondo’s brother’s name again?”

“Diarrhea.” Sayd makoto.

“LMAOOOOO k ur names diarrhea.” i told the child. 

“K lol.” he said. 

“Ermmm… ERRRRMM…. ERRRMEN AOT…… ERMINEM SLIM SHABBY SLIM ANUS….. ERRRRM…” byakuya erms.

“WHAT WANT BUTT FART???” I sowed   

“well everyone knows that babies need a mommy and daddy or else thre brains wont work. so im volunteering to be ur rich and morty. fuck wait no. rich baby daddy” he explammmed rickbabydaddily 

“??? Tf no!! richie bitches suck” and then I rapped the entirety of piggy pie by icp for everyone but it was a parody that fit the situation like that one mlp web series we all watched as kids that had the parody wreck it ralph op and there was also fuckin evelyn evelyn and confrontation from jekly and hyde parodies ummmm… hold on let me google it. PRINCESS TRIXIE SPARKLE BY MAGPIE PONY.

so I took a break from writing this and taking care of my bastard son to re watch that series and then the first four seasons of mlp and then like all of rainbow dash presents fuck i miss the early days of mlp lmao    

So anyways after that I came out of my room and Daiya II was like a teenager because I was watching mlp content for like fifteen years. 

“Hewwo mwommy” he said 

“Ew why do you still talk like that? Get that shit out of here.”

“Jeez you’re such a bitch.” He told me.

“:0??? >:0! Go to ur room you little shit!” 

“NO mom! >:0! YOU go to YOUR room!”

“Wait what.” and then my own son stabbed me. “Ow bitch u stabbed me in the tit.” 

“Yea but it’s dedly bc ur like 47893845748398.”

“...”

“...”

“SHIT” so yeah I fuckin died. 

“You… cunt.” I said and stoped living. 

When I woke up I was in hell. And who else was there???

Ur MOM! (sorry if ur mom is actually ded or somethin rip)

BUT ALSO MONDO AND DAIYA OWADA (the first one not my son)???? :0

“Hey cootie ;0” said doodie owada

“MONDO!” I cried running over to him.

“Am I a joke to you?” Daiya asked bc i ignored his dumb ass

“Wassup bbygrl C:” Mondo asked. 

“I missed you so much.” I told him. 

“Awww”

…

…

…

…

… 

“Kay let’s fuck already.” 

“K.” 

Our clothes all burned off bc my homophobic relatives tell me that I hell is hot. Then they bent me over. I suckked daiyas dick and took mondos in my ass. 

“Glucglucglucglucglucgluc” i said suckn dick. 

“Coom” and then I fake my organism. 

Soooo yeah were done and were just chillin wit angel hazbin hotel bc it’s hell. BUT IT TURNED OUT THAT DAIYA II WAS THERE BC HE WAS EXECUTED LMFAO

Anyways happy april fools day seeya next year :3

[bubblegum-and-ciggarettes]

I’m honestly tired of dc characters who are around Bruce’s age flirting with Dick or Jason like it’s so gross.

Like Harley sleeping with Dick and Canary appraising Dick for his, well, uh dick? Gross.

Plus Harley flirting with Jason too and the ship between Babs and Canary? Ew. Canary and Harley are the main ones I’ve seen that I can think about right now but they were already adults when Dick was a little kid.

It’s gross to see them flirting with Dick and Jason no matter if they’re also adults now.

I want to make it clear I don’t care about fan art. I’m talking about actual comic canon. Yes dc we’re aware Dick has grown up to be handsome and have a great butt, but we don’t need Harley or Canary who are like three times his age to comment on that.

Even as a throwaway joke it’s gross. I don’t know why dc thinks it’s okay to have women who were already adults to suddenly be so pervy towards someone they knew as a kid.

A lot of dc women do this who are Bruce’s age,(the boys’ practical FATHER)especially to Dick.

Idk I’m just tired of seeing it like imagine if Selina pounced on Damian when he grows up despite knowing him as a kid and her love interests son-oh wait.

But yeah people can ship whatever they want I just hate seeing dc panels used to gush over and it’s seemed less wrong than Babs and Bruce for some reason.

(Also I’m aware there have been other atrocities like Talia and Jason and the like but I’ve seen so many panels of Harley and Canary thirsting over Dick so they’re the main focus. And I deleted a part about Artemis bc it has come to my attention that she isn’t immortal so I don’t want to provide an example that may be confusing as I don’t know much about her/her and Jason.)

[kirishimas-manly-eyeliner]

A full, entire list of headcanons for a day with:

1. ☼ waking up with him ☼6am-8am

LISTEN UP Y’ALL

IF YOU DON’T SIMP FOR EIJIRO, JUST THINK:

YOU WAKE UP EVERY MORNING TO SEE HIS BEAUTIFUL, MESSY, CHAOTIC BED-HEAD WITH HIS HAIR DOWN AND HIS ADORABLE TIRED LIL’ SMILE

now if THAT doesn’t make you simp, you CONFUSE ME

anyways, so-

if there’s one thing that kirishima chooses to do, it’s to wake up early. i am so sorry to those who enjoy sleeping in, but hey, it’s the price we gotta pay to simp 😔✋

but omfg y’all, is the sweetest baby ever when you wake up with him! kirishima would most likely cuddle you first thing in the morning (…as in like 5 am-) and pull you in closer, planting a kiss on your forehead

“’morning, my beautiful pebble, d’ya sleep well?”

butcanwepleasetalkabouthowcutehisvoicewouldberightwhenhewakesup

you’ll also probably wake up to an insane amount of talking and chatting with him, and by six o’clock, he makes sure that you’re ready to be on your way

the sun is still rising where you guys are, so it’s actually pretty dark where you guys are

he ruffles your hair as he takes you on walks outside, hand in hand, no matter how tired you are

expect him to piggy back you, saying that it’s manly bc IT ISSSSS

2. ✎ doing online school with eijiro ✎ 8am-12pm, 2pm-4pm

“i think i’ve lost complete and utter trust in everything,” you groan. “i can’t even trust my video and mute button, and i need to trust those!”

kirishima grins at you as he plants a kiss on your forehead. “how ‘bout i buy you something tasty during break, huh?”

“kirishima, we’re literally broke,” you deadpan, half-joking but half speaking realistically.

“so what?” you’ve been working so hard lately, i figured that you at least deserve something as a reward.” he squeezes your shoulders from behind your seat (don’t worry, your video’s off for now :))

you raise an eyebrow. “…something?” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

“yeah! like maybe we could go for a walk, or-” he stares at your expression before he realizes what you implied. “baby, this is a sfw blog, we’re not allowed to-”

kirishima also most definitely pulls up a chair next to you in class, even though he doesn’t even know what you’re doing. he might not be in that class, but he’ll be right next to you the whole time in case you need help

when you do need help, he peers over your shoulder and helps you solve whatever problem you have right away

the sweetheart also gives constant reassuring reminders to drink water, i LOVE HIM

but when he leaves, he also says, “study and work hard, y/n! i’ll be right here for you during break!”

he promises you a kith and a hug if you keep on striving during online classes 🥺

kirishima likes to come in during class when your video is very much on, and he peeks his head in, waves, and then smiles before heading back out of the frame

“y/n, how do you fight villains, kick butt, literally stand up for an entire school, but you still rehearse how to say here?”

“shhhhh, i’m trying-”

another scenario, “y/n, can you please answer question four?”

“sure. the book that i chose for my report was the fault in our stars by john green, which implies the message that-”

“BABY, YOU GOTTA SEE HOW LOUDLY I CAN CLAP MY HANDS IF I USE MY QUIRK-”

you mute yourself, “DON’T YOU DARE-”

he makes online school almost exciting, and he just makes everything so much more enjoyable

kirishima also takes your hand, squeezing it tightly as he kisses your knuckles. “i’ll start making lunch. good luck baby!”

3. ♨ meals and afternoon walks with eijiro ♨ 12pm-1pm

HATE YOU BREAK IT TO Y’ALL BUT EIJIRO KIRISHIMA CANNOT COOK FOR THE HECK OF IT

y’all have seen him in the training camp thing,, right??

kirishima might not be the best at cooking, but you can count on him to take you somewhere!

man knows the best places where you live, and he just about literally gets whatever you want

you guys probably leave for a walk during break at noon, and kirishima makes sure that you feel safe and comfortable around him no matter what

afternoon walks are probably the most interesting part of your day, and the way lets you put your hand in the pocket of his hoodie just- 🥺🥺

i think something that isn’t stressed enough is people who seem less vulnerable being attacked by predators, so if anyone even dares to approach you, kirishima will LITERALLY POP OFF

not like the quirk pop off-

“HEY! that wasn’t very manly of you!”

as you walk along the way, kirishima makes sure to never let go of you and make sure you feel completely safe with him

you two probably stop by a nearby restaurant and get some sort of food to-go before heading back and eating during class, but shh your teacher doesn’t have to know-

he’s such a sweetheart like honestly

kirishima makes every meal taste like 50 times better, and he makes sure that you eat and drink lots of water!

but if you’re honestly having trouble with your appetite, kirishima makes sure not to push you too hard

he holds your hand if you ever get scared, he tells a joke ease your mind a lil’ 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

eijiro makes sure that no matter what happens, he holds your hand and tells you to take it easy, but also encourages you whenever you need it

he’s so sweet, please keep him

4. ◪ crying + evening naps ◪ 5pm-7pm

crying

kirishima knows that crying is just something that’s natural, whether it’s that you’re frustrated or just feel so tired, he understands

and it’s not even like you’re having a full blown panic attack or anything. you just gotta have your daily cries, ya know?

please tell me i’m not the only one who has like scheduled daily cries-

“it’s okay, crying’s healthy for you, anyway! it’s definitely better than keeping it bottled inside you. c’mere.”

he kisses your scalp as he rocks you back and forth, occasionally wiping away a tear

kirishima reminds you that reacting some way to a bad situation is natural

“if someone was in your shoes, they’d most definitely feel that way, too! don’t feel like you’re the only one, baby, because you’re not. i’m here whenever you need me.”

after, he takes your hand and drags you to get a glass of water. “if you ever nee to cry again, you gotta stay hydrated,” he winks

he’s also so caring and soft when he sees you upset, he gives you the best cuddles as he plays with your hair. kirishima occasionally, when you’re crying, whispers in a compliment.

“your eyes are so magical.”

“you have such a beautiful smile.”

“you’re so… beautiful.”

naps

for naps, kirishima omg please jUST BE REAL FOR ONE SECOND

PLEASE HOW DID MY LIFE COME TO BEING IN LOVE WITH A COLLECTION OF PIXELS-

that beautiful, loving, emotional support shark is who i’m in love with and it’s insane

you rest your head on his chest, breathing in his scent as he places his hands around your stomach

(also kirishima would most definitely adore plus-sized people and stretch marks/acne. he loves every insecurity that people growing up may have, and that just gives me SO MUCH HOPE-)

everything is just so insanely peaceful as he has soft music playing in the background, kissing your nose and cuddling in closer with you

the blanket is directly over you, and after a long day at work, you two decide to take a break together

kirishima also most definitely makes sure to wake up earlier for the nap than you so that he could get you a cup of water

he plays with your hair and gently shakes you when you need to get back to work 🥺🥺

5. ☾ going to bed + cuddling headcanons ☽ 10pm-12am

OKAY SO I KNOW I ALREADY DID SOMETHING LIKE THIS HERE

but i literally canNOT STRESS HOW MUCH LOVE I HAVE FOR THIS INDIVIDUAL

he usually doesn’t mind if you stay up late, but as long as you take care of yourself while you’re at it, that’s completely okay!

kirishima usually likes to make sure that you have a consistent sleep schedule though, even if you look at him in the face and go,

“excuse me? sleep schedule? who’s that?”

eijiro just laughs in such a pure way before he helps you tie your hair or keep it up when you’re brushing/rinsing

while you brush your teeth though, he kinda just wraps his arms around your waist in such a gentle way 🥺🥺

he’s such a gentleman and just wants you to be happy

after, he gets you a cup of water and sits next to you on the mattress

he sometimes likes to play old rom-coms or films while cuddling next to you, or maybe some fancy lil’ disney movies

sometimes he’ll pick horror movies and say “i’m manly enough, i can take it!” and then you’re completely unfazed while kirishima SCREAMS

“b-being vulnerable is manly!”

“oh golly i love you so much.”

something i absolutely adore about kirishima is that he has so much respect for women, enby’s, whatever it is, he just wants them to feel safe and comfortable

he makes sure that it’s okay for him to wrap his arms around you, and makes sure to respect your boundaries

there’s no better place to be than in his arms when he’s wearing a hoodie and your face is rested in the crook of his neck

his chest rises and falls as he turns off the lights, and he might play some light music in the background

kirishima likes to play with your hair and makes raspberry blows into your neck aND I PERSONALLY THINK THAT’S HILARIOUSLY ADORABLE

he’ll make sure that no matter what, you feel safe and comfortable around him

you two sometimes end up having really deep conversations at like 2 am with him

for no apparent reason, you two just start talking away like it’s nothing

he holds your hand and runs his hands through your hair, before whispering comfort into your ear

“you’re so, so beautiful,”

“you have the most beautiful smile,”

“has anyone told you how nice your eyes were?”

“i love you.”

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

Friday Night Stabby best quotes part 14 - Legacy Peeps edition (05/03/21)

people playing in this game: Skizz, Joker, Impulse, Zloy, Logic, Poppy (PoptartKatze), Pearl, Chim (ChimneySwift), Sausage, Avo (Avomance). prox chat is off bc the game updated and crewlink didnt work

…

Chim: Okay, I’m here! Don’t start without me! Poppy: We just started without you. Zloy: We just started without you.

...

*Impulse reports Skizz’s body* Impulse: Hello hello. Somebody killed my blueberry friend. Somebody killed my blueberry friend and I’m sad! Zloy: Quick let’s think about it: who had the motive? Impulse: It was in electrical, by the way. Poppy: I was messing with wires. Logic: That sounds very ‘electrical’. Poppy: Not messing with bodies! I was messing with wires IN electrical. Pearl: That’s where the body was, Poppy.

...

Impulse: I’m just happy to be part of this crew :) Pearl: So happy you would stab somebody?

...

Sausage: You voted for me?! Logic, get outta here! I didn’t even say one word, Logic!

...

Pearl: Another body in electrical. Poppy, have you been playing with wires again? Poppy: I was… somewhere. Not in electrical, obviously.

...

Joker: At the beginning of the game, I went into electrical and did my tasks and left and then I went ALL the way around to the other side to do asteroids in weapons. Pearl: I actually believe that; I remember seeing you in there. Zloy: I’m sorry, I was not listening. I was too busy voting you out of the airlock.

...

Logic: *is the only one who voted for Sausage again* Sausage: Stop it, Logic! I hate you!

...

Zloy, during the round: This is a public announcement that ghosts can and should do their tasks. Sausage: Roger roger. Logic: Roger roger. Zloy: It’s a public announcement, you don’t need to roger roger if I’m speaking over the intercom.

...

Pearl: I think it’s Logic; all of us have been in the middle for the majority of the round. Zloy: I’m pretty sure Logic hasn’t been, so let’s yeet him. Impulse to his chat: Oh no. He’s getting yeeted.

...

Zloy: Joker, can I have my lime back, please? Joker: What, Zloy? What’d you say? Zloy: Can I have my lime back? Everybody knows I’m lime. Since Avo stole green. Avo: I didn’t steal anything! *changes colour to brown* Zloy: *changes colour to green* There we go. Thank you, Avo. Avo: You are welcome, sir. Zloy: See? This is how you make friends. This is how you establish connections. Joker: Zloy, we’re- We’ve always been friends, though.

...

Skizz: Okay, who was not doing tasks? We were down to one task for, like, a month. Joker: I want to say that I did all my tasks and that you should be proud of me. Skizz: Well, you WANNA say that but can you say it truthfully? Joker: I DID do all my tasks. Skizz: Well, atta boy. Joker: Are you proud? :D Skizz: I AM proud of you! :D

...

*body is reported* Avo: Who did it?! Skizz: You make one heck of a detective.

...

Skizz: I was 100% with Impulse, you’re absolutely right, but he cut into reactor and I went up towards upper engine. Avo: I did see Skizz in north engine. Joker: So you cut Impulse and then went up? Skizz: Okay! Well, you know what, don’t make me do it, Mister Joker! You’re adding all these extra words. Joker: Do what? You’re gonna kill me? Skizz: No, I- I could not be more- I’ve been playing with you a while. I have kind of a- It’s not fair, I- I’ve been playing with Joker for a while. This is how he talks when it’s him. Joker: What?! No it’s not! Skizz: And there goes the high pitched voice. Like a recipe. It’s like a RECIPE with you. Joker: You’re getting me confused with Impulse.

...

Chim: So we’re voting for Poptart? Wait- Poppy: No! I FOUND the body. Chim: Oh. But how do we know you didn’t CREATE the body?

...

Zloy: It’s like rock-paper-scissors. Skizzleman beats Joker, Impulse beats Skizzleman, Sausage beats… uh… what’s-his-face. Logic. Logic: What’s-his-face? What’s-his-face?!

...

Avo: There’s a green body! Mister Joker in electrical, just as I went into electrical to do my electrical tasks. Chim: That’s pretty sus. Skizz: That’s what he gets! Sausage: Self-report. Poppy: Self-report for sure. Avo: It is not a self-report. I can put my hand on my Avomancian heart and say it was not I. Skizz: Wooow, that was diggin’. Pearl: Very sus. Zloy: Yeah, I was about to advocate that there’s no reason to self-report on the first kill of the game but you changed my mind single-handedly. *votes* Skizz: Whoa, Zloy! We need a little bit more. Little bit more.

...

Avo: I’ve never been so hurt in all my life getting voted on that. Skizz: It was just Zloy.

...

Skizz: I don’t wanna wrong Avo again. Avo: I’d be very disappointed if you wronged me again, Skizz. Impulse: What if I wrong you? Cuz I saw you and Logic take off towards electrical together. Zloy and I were still chilling, dumping trash. Avo: I was dumping trash with you, Impulse! For goodness sake! Impulse: Yeah, then you and Logic ran off together and you killed him. Chim: Wait, what about trash? Impulse: Avo just called Logic trash because that’s who he killed. He was taking out the trash, you heard it.

...

Pearl: Make sure to vote, Chim. Chim: I did. I voted for “skip”. Whoever that guy is, he’s super sus all the time.

...

Zloy: So it was a double kill, which means that we’re operating with people who are really, really comfortable being around one another. Chim: Or there’s a sniper. Zloy: A WHAT? Chim: A sniper. You know… like, a long-barrelled gun that shoots bullets at a long distance. Zloy: We’re on a SPACESHIP! Chim: That’s a good point. I’m getting too immersed.

...

*Skizz and Pearl win as imposters* Zloy: Hey, remember when I said it’s competent people and my idea was that it was Skizz and Pearl because they were the only ones left who are competent? *everyone immediately protests*

...

Zloy: Double kill by electrical. SPARKS were flying. Joker: If I get imposter, I’m killing you first, Zloy.

...

Chim: I did a scan in medical. Impulse: Oh yeah? How much did you weigh? Chim: I don’t wanna talk about it. Impulse: What’s your blood type? Chim: What blood type is not sus?

...

Zloy: Chim walked right past a body. Chim: Oh I did? OH! That WAS a corpse, wasn’t it? I thought it was, like, a pet. Literally, no joke, I thought it was a pet. I didn’t even- Zloy: I’m completely certain that you are a crewmate and I still want to throw you out of an airlock right now.

...

Zloy: We had fun! Let’s go to medbay with everybody. It’ll be fun. You can watch your friends get undressed and scan themselves.

...

Skizz: Maybe when you undressed for your scan, Chim, Zloy saw something that you don’t want him to tell the world about. Chim: Well, I mean… ;)

...

Joker, getting voted out: Well, that’s rude.

...

Chim: You can’t spell Sausage without ‘sus’. Skizz: Are you saying Sausage is a… SAUSpect?

...

Skizz: I think he wanted a piece of the Skizz. He wanted a Skizz sandwich! Logic: Skizz, I would never do something like that to you! Never! Skizz: I was your first kill, homie.

...

Chim: I have a body to report! Zloy: Boy do you. Chim: What? Why would you say that, Zloy? Zloy: Nothing. Chim: You know about a body? Zloy: I’ve just been staring at your butt for most of this round. Chim: Yeah, why’ve you been following me? Zloy: I’ve been following you because I needed a buddy. *later* Pearl: So what we’re getting at is it’s either Zloy or Sausage? Chim: No, I don’t think it was Zloy cuz he was honestly on my booty the whole time. It was sus but wasn’t THAT sus.

...

*Avo kills Impulse and Skizz immediately walks in* Skizz, singing to the tune of Bad Romance: Whoaa whoaa whoaaaaa, your killer, he is Avomance. Pearl: What happened? Skizz: I walked into reactor as Avo is walking out and there’s bloody footprints as he’s walking away from the body. Zloy: I appreciate how extra you are.

...

Zloy: Look, you can always trust a man who is not afraid to sing Lady Gaga. That man has nothing to hide.

...

Joker: I found Poptart’s body in… Chim: In the cereal aisle? Joker: Yeah, in the cereal aisle. Haha. Um… Yeah, I found- Avo: THAT was sincere (/s)

...

Impulse: I do feel kinda bad sussing [Avo] last round too but- I mean, he KILLED me! So hey. Avo: You deserved it, Impulse.

...

Pearl: Could someone kill me? I haven’t been killed yet.

...

Chim: Where’s the body? Joker: It’s where you left it.

...

Joker: You were chasing me and then luckily, someone put up the doors and blocked you from getting to me. I also watched you stand on a vent, change your mind, and go the other direction. Chim: How do you know I changed my mind? You can’t see anything through my little spacesuit. And I was following you cuz you looked like a pro with your little party hat. I thought maybe you were going somewhere cool and I wanted to check out where you were going. Joker: You’re a horrible liar. I don’t even know you but you’re a bad liar.

...

Skizz: Lemme tell you something there, Pearly Pop. I know that you loved killing me; I know you did. So I want you to know HOW you killed me. See, what you did was- I was wiring the ship. ‘Kay? I was saving lives, I was busy saving lives. You punched me in the head and I turned around and looked at you and you shot me right in the face. That was the animation that showed. Pearl: That’s great :D I love it.

...

*vote ties between Chim and skipping* Skizz: Oh my gosh! Zloy: We were ALMOST free, everyone.

...

Skizz: I’m done. Is anyone else done? Joker: I finished my tasks again, Skizz. Are you proud? Skizz: I AM proud of you! Joker: Look at me doing tasks! Skizz: I’m impressed! Joker: Thanks, man :D

...

*Zloy’s body is reported* Avo: There’s a dead Russian outside navigation.

...

Zloy: The reason [Impulse and Pearl] are so good as imposters is specifically because they know when to shut up.

...

Avo: We don’t know that Pearl wasn’t a killer. Joker: Well, how do we know YOU’RE not a killer? Avo: You have my word as an English gentleman, obviously. Joker: You can’t fool me with your fancy accent.

[phoebehalliwell]

i don't know if i'm the only one but i've often wondered exactly how hard it was to convince julian mcmahon to stick around for season five. they took his character, a feared powerful half demon and made him into the butt of the joke and the whole joke was basically ha ha look at this lovestruck fool obsessing and suicidal because he's got nothing to live with but can't die. ain't that funny? like how the fuck did the writers sell that to julian is my question

i find the entirety of season five just so goddamn insulting to cole's character. hell the fact that he got possessed by the source and this was treated as him turning evil instead of a shitty situation that got out of hand. like it wasn't bad enough he was villified for something that he wasn't even in control of half the time they couldn't even just vanquish the dude, they dragged it on and ridiculed him. i hate it here

lol. i mean. yeah. i really. like. it's like. like okay we all know cole was a fan favorite right and he & phoebe were really meant to like. be the sex appeal to the show no one else was really filling that role they were charmed's Sexy Couple tm. so like. in a sense i get the notion ab wanting to keep him around. because everyone loves him! he's bad boy! he adds this dangerous edge love balancing on a knife's point stuff like that. so like. that being said. u wanna keep him around. i just like Do Not Get how you opt to keep him around Like That. tbh. as w all things. i am blaming brad kern. i think it all really started to tank s4 (well, with mortal cole, but like) with source cole. that was bad, but i know it was part of the push to have like long form season drama character driven plots conflict between the sisters themselves it just like. sucked ass and balls imo. like i mean the fact they had to do the source as a possession just so they could get demon cole and lover cole,,, i mean it speaks to how stupid it was. the fact that u wanted cole to be a villain So Bad but the only way to do it was like. possession? sign that u should not do that like. like. like. i don't know how we're supposed to feel ab that.

and then. the vanquish. not sticking. i think like. i think they probably had the vague idea that cole having a mortal soul would not be able to be vanquished properly right? like. demons get destroyed into nothingness, but the human part of him lives, so i think they probably knew that was what they were going to do, that's what they sold to jmm and like. we sowed those seeds in the s4 finale w his ghost whispers and materialization. so i think like. they knew they wanted to Not Kill Him because he was such a fan favorite. maybe there was an intention to do a will they won't they variant of phole? and then. of course. there was the whole idea of paige cole, which, as the rumor goes, was meant to kick of in the s5 pilot, but both julian and rose shut it down. but i feel like. assuming that's true (which i 100% do assume that's true absolutely and i'm not endorsing it i don't think it would have been good or well written or whatever but like. 👀. you know?) but yeah. assuming that's true, i feel like that piece really speaks to what their designs for cole were: man meat. he was meant to be their male sex appeal and they weren't going to be picky about the narrative itself as long as he was still kicking.

but like honestly? i mean i shouldn't have to say this it's a given: it's not enough to just put your sexy man in front of a camera and call it a day like imo even a man who is not sexy can be made appealing through the power of the narrative. like, to level with you, i never really ever shipped phole nor found cole attractive at all like ever, but i can see like the fucking support beams you know i can see the infrastructure on which this whole thing can you know take on a life of its own in the earlier seasons because they very consciously put it there!! people shipped it for a reason n not just because they were two people standing next to each other on a tv screen i mean hello almost sinking a dagger in her heart but can't do it sends her away back to her sisters because he can't act out on his evil plan!! that's something!!!! that's so very something and they gave us Nothing they gave us nothing in the later seasons. and still expected it to fly. like. tbh julian was probably just like unwittingly duped like dragged along for the ride s5 which is likely why he was vanquished halfway through because i'd imagine roughly three episode in he went okay! um. what's this? guys? what's this? and then they said cole<3 you know he like knew he had to get the hell outta dodge.

anyways. if i were to resuscitate phole in s5. which like. to level w u. i wouldn’t. because they would need a lot of one-on-one screentime and we already spent so much of s4 splitting up the sisterhood in the name of phole i wouldn’t really want to continue with that per se But. if i were. this ask is getting long it’s under a cut 

something something demon of the week something something realms the point is cole is there when he very much shouldn’t be and like. he and phoebe get knocked into a different plane. so their bodies are fine and at the manor, but their minds are elsewhere and they need to solve whatever it is in order to get back. and we’ll say there’s a fuckin deadline because the girls need the power of three and right now they are sealed off from accessing it. and you know phoebe’s pretty fuckin pissed with cole because you know. he dragged her down to hell and she almost gave birth to the antichrist. actually source’s heir might be fun to keep around in this au idk. the point is phoebe’s pissed at cole and cole’s pissed at phoebe because phoebe’s pissed at him but he literally didn’t have control over himself in that era and he’s not getting the space he needs to justify himself because phoebe keeps stepping over him. but they gotta work together to get out of here. and were kinda doing enemies to lover 2.0 but like now they have History. of course we’ve gotta do a moment where cole has idk done something normal and phoebe’s so riled up that she does something rash and almost dies cole saves her like catches her bridal style or something faces inches apart breathing heavy and there’s a moment. like a we’re back in early s4 moment. which phoebe immediately breaks from and like walls going flying up but just for a moment there we see it it’s obvious: she’s still in love with cole. which then segues into an argument because like. cole wasn’t sure. right? he wasn’t sure if phoebe now just genuinely hated him. but now he knows right he knows better now so why are you acting like this? why are you taking every opportunity to shut me down to shut me out? why are you acting like you hate me when you know that’s not true right that whole thing to phoebe who gets the Classic because i do hate you. i hate you for what you did to me for what you did to my family and i hate you because i loved you so much and you destroyed me and i hate you because no matter how hard i try that love is still there and i know that for a second if i stop hating you i’m going to love you just like before and you can destroy me again and i hate myself because i’d let you because i love you. you know? big speech. big reveal. i have No Idea what piper and paige are up to right now. the point is. after this big confession we get the lull the cards are on the table what the fuck do we do now which is when cole Finally gets to opportunity to say he was actually possessed by the source and manipulated by the seer and the only thing that kept him holding on was his love for her and after she became queen of hell after he saw what the source had done to her he knew it had to end he doesn’t hold it against her for vanquishing him right this is where we exonerate all wrongs we’re just saying anything bad that has happened ever? scrub it. it’s the source’s fault. cole has no resentment against phoebe. he loves her a healthy, normal, non-possessive amount, so much so He Loves Her So Much he let her kill him and like honestly would probably do it again. idk and then they make out or something. and then they’re out of whatever plane they were in by the end of the episode. And Then we get a buddy cop episode with paige and cole where they bond and also sort through everything that happened there. slowly but surely. and then we do a real phole wedding a super small affair in the manor lowkey bc i hated their wedding episode it blowed we give them a good one. wallah <3

[jpegjade]

Confessions - Spencer Reid

frens and ferns, IM OUT OF SCHOOL FOR A MONTH. so here’s a new fic about something i’ve been struggling with lately...

summary: With emily gone, Spencer is having a hard time coping with her death. After a little prodding, he finds comfort in y/n, who is struggling with their own demons.

gender: neutral (i think. i tried not to point to any gender terms so hopefully i did okay at it bc i dont feel like proofreading.)

Warnings: talk of addiction but nothing more

———

Getting home from a case was always, hard on you. There were days when it was harder to get up in the morning because of the physical and emotional toll the job put on your body. Ever since that un-sub broke your ankle, everything has been even harder.

“Y/L/N, nice to see you back." Morgan said as you exited the elevator.

“You too, D." You said, plastering a fake smile on your face. In truth, you wished that you were off for one more week but the world wasn't that kind to you.

The doors to the elevator were slowly closing when you heard Spencer shuffling quickly toward your direction.

Before you had the chance to throw your arm in the way of the elevator sensors, Spencer's slender body slipped through.

You were a newer member to the team. Well... You were the only new member to the team. Being a replacement for agent Emily Prentiss, the team getting to know you was a process. Derek trained you so he already knew what you were like in action but this was the first case the rest of the team saw you on.

The silence in the elevator was loud and thick with anticipation. Spencer was looking over at you in quick glances when he wasn't staring at his converse.

“You didn't press a number." Spencer said, barely loud enough for you to hear.

"Oh... I guess that explains why if felt like I was going nowhere." You chuckled at your joke and winced when you met Dr. Reid's blank gaze.

"Do you..." He paused.

Spencer shook his head, clearing the thought from his mind. You continued staring but he dropped his gaze back to his shoes as if he hadn't started and dropped a question.

The elevator doors opened, showing an empty garage. The two of you gestured for the other to exit first but you ended up going first.

“Did you want to ask me something. Dr. Reid?" You said, watching him hesitate.

"Spencer." He said, ignoring the question. "My friends call me Spencer."

"I didn't think we were friends yet." You blankly. It wasn't meant to be funny but you couldn't help but smile.

“My team consists of my friends. As you are on my team, we're friends." Spencer's face never changed.

"Okay, Spencer." You looked at him. If you weren't so worried about getting home, you would've indulged in the moment. But all you wanted to do right now was be alone with some pizza and take the edge off from today.

"If that's all..." You tried to close the interaction with him by taking a few steps back but Spencer took just as many slow steps forward.

"Actually," Spencer began, "how do you do it?"

You faked a chuckle. "Do what?"

“Hide your addiction so well." Spencer was so pointblank sometimes.

"What are you talking about?" You tried to control the beads of sweat that threatened to pool.

"Everybody knows.” It's your ankle that started the painkillers and you couldn't stop. It took you away from the pain, the humiliation.

“How could you be so stupid as to get caught? You're even dumber for finding solice in the feeling when you've got all of this support around you? You've got a family who..." Spencer trailed off.

Your head was still reeling from the beginning of his statement. Everyone knew... But how could that be? It wasn't obvious but something was off about the distant look in Spencer's eyes. It was like he wasn't looking or talking to you. The anger laced in his tone wasn't for you...

“Spencer," you took a step towards him, "Are you talking about you?" Spencer stopped talking. You weren't used to seeing him so quiet.

"It's been a while." Spencer looked down at his converse. "Emily was there. When it got bad, I would cuddle up with her cat on her couch and try to forget the thoughts. She wouldn't make me feel like a burden at 2 a.m., when I was screaming myself awake. She always told me to stay as long as I needed, even when I was positive she was fed up with me. I wish I believed her. I wish I stayed." Spencer tapered off into silence, sniffling.

A pipe dripping. Footsteps in the stairwell. A car alarm chirping. All of those things sounded louder than they normally would. This wasn't Spencer cornering you. This was a confused and hurting boy that was begging for help. He just didn't know how to say what he needed right now.

“Do you..." You started but stopped because it didn't feel right.

Where do you start with someone who is just like you: broken, hurting, and alone.

How do you comfort someone without enabling them to do something destructive that might make everything worse?

How do you avoid hurting someone when all you wanted to do was hurt yourself, in a way.

"Do you like pancakes?" You asked, startling him out of his thoughts. "Pancakes? Sure." Spencer slowly lifted his head and shrugged.

You started walking to your car, motioning for Spencer to follow.

The car ride with Spencer was filled with silence. The whole time, you were thinking about ways to explain the situation to Spencer without making it worse. Spencer was trying to decide if talking to you was a good idea after all, considering you were taking him somewhere pancake related.

Pulling up to the run-down diner, you looked over at Spencer, who was staring out the window.

"I promise the pancakes are better than the place looks." You chuckled, getting Spencer's attention.

"I wasn't really worried about the taste of the pancakes..." Spencer trailed off.

"Good, I guess." You said, a little bit defeated.

You and Spencer walked into the diner, where you were greeted by a friendly older woman named Janice. She knew your name by heart, since you were a regular, and she seated you at your normal booth.

"Actually, would you mind seating us at 12? This is Spencer, the guy I've told you about..." You blushed, hoping you said everything low enough for Spencer not to notice. His mind was elsewhere so he wasn't listening as he normally would. A part of you was grateful for that.

Janice did a once-over at Spencer, softly grinning, and brought you to table 12.

Despite the outside looking dingy, the inside of the diner was cleaner than Spencer thought it would be. He wasn't really fond of booths but these weren't the pillow seat booths where children could hide things between the bottom seat and the backrest. This was the plastic seats that hurt your butt after a little while. But what he noticed that was different about the seating at the table was that one half was a booth and the other half consisted of two four-legged chairs.

"I know you don't like the germs in booth seats so I figured this would be a better option." You said, unable to meet his eyes.

Spencer was shocked as you slid into the booth seat, avoiding his eyes. Spencer pulled out his chair, temporarily distracted by the fact that he never mentioned how much he hates booth seats. You paid attention and noticed that about him. What else had you noticed?

"So..." Spencer folded his hands in his lap nervously.

"Let's order and then we'll talk." You said, trying to focus on the task at hand.

Placing your orders, you went with your usual breakfast at midnight and he just ordered the same thing you ordered.

"It'll be good, I promise." You said, giving him a small smile.

"You never answered my question." Spencer said, looking up at you.

"I know." You were getting nervous again. The nerves hadn't stopped since Spencer asked that question in the parking lot but you were trying really hard to find an answer to it.

"How do you do it?" Spencer asked again.

"Spencer, it's not that simple. I can't give you an answer like that over something so complex. Why do you want to know?" You asked, trying to focus on meeting his eyes.

Spencer's gaze was intense when he wanted it to be so you settled for staring at the tip of his nose.

"I'm struggling, y/n. Emily was... She was family to me. If Hotch is the dad, Rossi is the cool uncle, JJ is the mom, Derek is the older brother, and Emily is..." Spencer's voice caught in his throat. "Was the big sister. I lost a sister the day she died and I'm lost without her."

"Spencer, I'm so sorry..." You said, wanting to hug him.

A tear slipped down Spencer's face as you watched him frustratedly wipe it away.

"It's not fair, you know?" Spencer continued. "I survived the worst days of my life. I got to live after experiencing torture and she didn't do anything but fall in love with someone who wasn't..."

There was a moment of silence as you let Spencer get his feelings out. While the two of you said nothing, Janice brought your food and drinks to your table. She must have sensed the tension between you and Spencer because once you thanked her, she didn't hover or make additional conversation.

"It just hurts and I don't... I don't want to feel it. I just want to escape the constant pain and be happy again, just for a little while. It doesn't have to stay forever but I don't want this pain to hurt like this for now." Spencer cut into his pancakes, taking a bite. His face changed into something of contentment.

"I come here when I have a... I guess you could say craving." You started, "Carbs and sugar are good for the itching feeling you get when you really need a fix."

A moment passed as the two of you enjoyed the food in front of you. After downing half of your food, you decided to speak again.

"What's your drug of choice, if you don't mind me asking?" You quietly said, your eyes staying trained on the way your butterknife slowly cut into your pancakes.

"Dilaudid." Spencer was so upfront about it. You thought you would have to pull it out of him but he made your job easier.

"Ah... Opioids are a bitch to kick. Controlled substance so I won't ask how you got it but I understand it's not easy. There was this study we had to do in training. This one agent got captured and tortured and the BAU had to watch as he was drugged, tortured, and almost died... I guess you would know them, right?" You asked, trying to figure out which team member it was.

"That was me." Again, Spencer being upfront.

"Oh...Spencer, I'm so sorry... I didn't know." You were remorseful, you shouldn't have brought it up.

"That's where it began. I begged for him not to do it the first time, not wanting the drugs. But after that? After the torture and pain and... Everything? I craved that release. And even after he died, I just wanted to get away from all of the stress in life. Feel warmth in my veins, mentally zoning out for just long enough to reset my mind and be reminded that there was something good in the world..." Spencer looked over your shoulder but his eyes weren't fixed on a particular spot.

That's the thing about being an addict... You don't realize how much it hurts to be alive until the high sends you crashing back down. And, especially in our line of work, all you want is to stay up for as long as possible because the horrors of reality will tear you apart..." You finished.

Spencer's attention came back to you as you spoke, making you a little uncomfortable. You couldn't meet his eyes.

"I went to a couple meetings in the past." Spencer said, thinking about his experiences there. "I didn't feel like I belonged. I have a good life. Stable job. I'm fortunate enough to have a roof over my head. My mom is taken care of by capable people. I don't have to worry about anything. And the guys there? They're struggling in many cases. They're fighting for the things I take for granted and I didn't know how I could stand to be in the same room with my privileges and pretend like my problem was important..." Spencer trailed off.

"Spencer, your addiction is valid." You were finally able to look him in the eyes and emphasize your point.

"Is it, though?" Spencer stared back at you, a challenging tone laced his voice.

"It's not fun..." You started, unable to look at Spencer any longer. "I don't do it for fun or because I want to stay high. I don't do it for the feeling it gives me. I do it because I feel like I have to."

"What do you mean?" Spencer tilted his head like a puppy who was trying to understand a new word.

"After I broke my ankle, I was prescribed these... Off brand pills. They didn't really help unless I snorted them. And even then, they didn't help my ankle or me. So I found something stronger. A friend of mine is a doctor and when I go to see him, I'm able to... I guess manipulate him into giving me the good stuff, the stuff that makes my thoughts slow down, calms the voice, gives me a sense of peace and not this constant anxiety." You said, hands tapping the table.

"Oh..." Spencer said, taking in what you were saying.

"I'm an addict not for pleasure but for pain. And my struggle is no greater or lesser than yours." You said, fingers still tapping away. "I struggle, like you, except the difference is I'm newer to the team so they don't know what it's like to see me in my chaotic neutral state. What did you do when you had cravings before? You must have been clean for a couple years now, right?"

"I went to Emily... I always went to Emily. I play back these moments when I snapped at her for wanting to help and I wish I just..." Once again, Spencer's voice was caught in his throat.

"She was your safe space when you felt like you couldn't turn to anyone else." You said, understanding. "You don't have to be romantically inclined to have a safe space with someone. It's whomever you find solace in, for any reason under and over the sun."

"I wouldn't feel this way if she were here..." Spencer said, more to himself as if he were trying to be convincing.

"Spencer, you have to be honest with yourself. If it wasn't this, it would be something else. And that something else might not have landed you with someone who was willing to assist you in your recovery to stay clean." You said, finishing your pancakes.

"What?" Spencer did a double take. No one had ever offered to help him. He always had to be the first to make the move but even then, everyone was reluctant to take on the responsibility of Spencer.

"Isn't there an unspoken rule about addicts not being with each other?" Spencer asked, genuinely concerned.

He hoped not because he would love to have someone he could finally confide in, someone who wouldn't make him feel like a burden.

"No, that's about addicts not dating each other. But I think that as friends, we can understand each other in ways others cant. We can fight together. Have you notiiced the craving is gone, for the most part?" You asked, sure that Spencers single slice would be gone in a moment.

"Okay. Deal. We can confide in one another and maybe it'll help us get a grip on reality when we feel ourselves slipping.”

“Okay.”

—

taglist: @goldentournesol @averyhotchner @mggsprettygirl

[fallingsunflower]

BESTIES I'm so sorry - I hit my post limit waaaay earlier than expected! Some of y'all joined me on my backup account, (which I also hit the limit on lmao), but I'm back now.

I had over 400 asks to go through and I'll give you a warning that not all of them will appear (either because they were old or because they were topics we already answered). But here is a giant list of asks I compiled for you from when I wasn't allowed to post lol they don't really require my response but I found them entertaining to read. Hope you don't mind I've just put them all together in one post. It's also to save me from using up my 250 posts lol

"this is all so embarrassing like my god imagine when the promotion of the movie starts how horrible it will be for other people who made the movie too"

"SELL UR TICKETS TODAY WATCH THE MOVIE ILLEGALLY, next article we’ll be talking about these two assholes filing for bankruptcy. cheap harlots. don’t mess with your meal ticket."

"hate to say it but i defs think they‘ve got a sliver of the gp’s attention for five minutes"

"I am scanning through all these photos looking for just ONE where he looks like he's smiling and enjoying this. It's so crazy."

"I guess those are all the pics we’re getting right now. But I wouldn’t be surprised if they finish the Italy trip off with one more major Backgrid photo shoot."

"Olivia’s trending on Twitter but not Harry. Like it’s obvious who’s getting the PR gains here!"

"If they dont give us a 6 month or more break after this im gonna need them to pay for my therapy bills from now on bc of this damage no joke let me crawl back into my shit hole now 😑"

"The palce they at is referred to as “tuscanys best-kept secret”. Everyone point and laugh."

"she looks like she’s enjoying all of this. he looks like he wants to push her into the water."

"a few people said he’s keeping his shorts pulled up or covered in all the shots because of the Nike branding which they ask to not get photographed. What a setup."

"Man I knew the second those Tomdaya pics came out of them kissing and how they were trending so fast that HO were going to do something to 'top' them. Its pathetic /// FRRR. she probably hoped for the positive reactions that people gave tom & zendaya but unfortunately, miss girl got the opposite. when will they realize that nobody, but his fans, find them cute lmao can they just stop, it’s so embarrassing 😭😭😭"

"He really out here doing this with someone who almost old enough to be his mother, shiiiiiiiit. Sickening. Sick of these 2 for real now, i was fine with the good old blurry back content and whatnot but this? Crossing a line here nobody wanna see that shit and knowing how people feel goooooood damn."

"I aboslutely despise kendall for obvious reason but this one is actually worse than the hendall one bc you couldnt really see as much as now dis gos tang."

"She’s also wearing the cross necklace again. I feel like if that was so meaningful to her she wouldn’t risk loosing it in the ocean 🙄"

"guys have eyes on tmz. I Do not have tw now. they were so aggressive towards them"

"I'm sorry for Harry because you lost your damn mind bro"

"Now why the hendall pics are better ?? NO SHADE BUTT"

"I’m genuine confused like do they actually want dwd to flop or what? I just threw up in my mouth I sure as hell ain’t gonna watch their sorry ass movie. Is it supposed to flop? I’m so confused!"

"The match was not interesting enough so they cooked up something different especially since people were pointing out how they staged the PDA. And the page 6 article is out already!!!"

"Who the fuck thought this was a good idea"

"Is it just me or does harry's face looks really blank for someone out on a Romantic date with his alleged girlfriend.?"

"if thats it, harry hasn’t no game🤣🤣🤣🤣"

"so this is why the tabloids weren’t talking about the match pics! they didn’t have any value on their own. now with the yacht pics? my oh my they’re gonna get the clicks of their lives. her team was prob like “wait a sec we got something for y’all”"

"If they were models hired to act like a couple they wouldn't get the job......"

"Not them starring right at the camera in some of them help make it less obvious will you"

"HENDALL🤣🤣🤣is that uuuu"

"Harry’s ass crack thought it should make an appearance too."

"What a great day for team PR, happy Monday you guys! Let's pop the champagne 🍾🍾🍾🍾 P. S. They both need acting lessons, tbh"

"It’s quite interesting how everything that’s happened before I’ve seen predicted weeks/and in advance on blogs or fan accounts. Like his life has always been so predictable but damn"

"He was hiding the Nike check. That’s why his swim trucks are rolled up to an absurd degree even for him. He knew he was gonna get photographed."

"What I’m noticing is wether people like them together or not, everyone’s saying they’re aren’t a hot couple…there was more chemistry in the Kendall pics by far"

"i also find it weird that he’s not smiling in any of the pictures and it would be one thing if there were five pics from ten minutes of time but there are like 70 from an obvious extended period of time"

"It's interesting everyone involved is being Team Try Hard. Yet the universe says no. The last set of pics, Tom and Zendaya overshadowed. People even paid more attention to Angelina and the Weekend (even if business possibly). Fast forward to today and all this fakery only for Gwen/Blake to tie the knot. His team needs to get a clue. She needs to go. Harry needs to clean this up fast."

"Ok i looked at one hugging pic and one kidding pic and they could not look more stagged. It looks unatural ,strange and weird from all angles. You can clearly see from their body posture they are posing for a photographer from backgrid."

"Like I said in my ask a couple days ago the day we get kissing pics is the day that I believe this is all a stunt and I was right. They took a page out of hendall 2016 and it’s looks so forced and awkward. Hendall did it better cause at prater they had chemistry. They must be scared this movie is going to tank because they are pushing this way too hard"

"Real, PR, or whatever relationship it is, they’re fucking boring. You are on a yacht in Italy, can’t you have a little bit of fun? I can’t believe how boring they are, I just can’t. Even if it is just PR, can’t you make a fucking dumb joke so you can laugh or something? Do they have anything in common like to talk about or discuss or make fun of? I’d literally killed myself if I looked like that in a relationship. They are not communicating in any photos we’ve got. They are just walking, or sitting. Even when they hold hands or kiss or hug, they never communicate."

"okay but did ya’ll see the pic of her diving in?? i can’t stop laughing 😭😭😭😭"

"they look horrifically awkward i cannot believe what harry is doing"

"“HEY PAPS COME GET A PIC OF US KISSING TO MAKE OUR RELATIONSHIP MORE BELIEVABLE!!!!!”"

"his ass is hanging out and her bra is almost off what in the hell"

"Hqs on a yacht like that? Mhmhmhm hmmmmm / I bloody well hope that’s not the extend of their acting. That’s dire! 🤦‍♀️"

"this is literally the most predictable “couple” to exist. first, people talked about them showing up the game, and they did. second, people were just talking about kissing pics... AND THEY JUST CAME OUT LMAOOOOOO"

"annnnnnnnnnnnnd there it is. YOU KNOW THEY KNEW THERE WAS A CAMERA."

"ok but where’s the pda or did that get made up? cause these have to be the most awkward pics i’ve ever seen which makes me feel better 😂 also i can feel the meme’s coming with the one of her diving off the boat"

"I call it how I see it they are both assholes and full of shit. Like do your fake kiss somewhere else I do not want to see it!"

"Can they at least act like they’re having a good time?"

"hahahaha I can't stop laughing with that photo of O it's literally her knowing she's being photographed and diving into a professional swimmer style😭"

"the pics are so organic that Olivia is looking straight at the pap before kissing Harry."

"he looked a lot happier with kendall in their yacht pics compared to today’s. i know that was PR too, but he was very smiley and seemed talkative. with this girl it’s like the complete opposite lmao."

[jiminrings]

cabin pressure

pairing: taehyung x y/n

glimpse: pilot!y/n who accidentally became famous bc of a viral post about her, best friend!jimin!, taehyung having a shy lil crush on you aND ot7 being meanies for a tad bit :((

wordcount: 17k

notes: this is my first bts fic im gonna post and for sentimentality’s sake, im paying homage to the bullet-point format™️ because this is the same thing i use for my reviewers and it’s v effective in making me focus and not lose interest!!! 

╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

jimin really misses you :((

you’re his longtime friend!! someone who’s stuck with him even before he was famous!!

unlike tHose who suddenly appeared claiming that “aHHHHH jimin from bts aha actually we were friends even tho i have never spoke to him once hE’s actually asking me out and-“

and he loves u to death even the both of you fond each other annoying at times

like that one time he pretended he was sick with a bug just to get u out of your very important meeting just bECAUSE he wanted u to cook up a meal he missed

“hey why are u crying and also can you pls still cook why you’re crying”

“jimin i fucking hate you”

:((

and needless to say he really made up for it because he may have screwed up your job bc he wanted you to drop EVERYTHING to cook cheesy tonkatsu for him

so yes he really went up and above just to get you to forgive him

and u know what

jimin misses his best friend so much that he’s thinking of you in the middle of a meeting

and literally at the mention of bon voyage, the gears in his head start spinning!!!!

basically his thought process was:

bon voyage = abroad = y/n = oH DAMN OH RIGHT Y/N’S A PILOT = airplane whoosh = abroad = BON VOYAGE!!!!

“PD-nim!!!!!!”

“what”

and he’s really gonna make a leap for this because it’s given that him and the boys ride in private jets and first-class and all

literally everyone is looking at him now because his previous outburst of a call was surely attention-grabbing and it makes him shrink a bit because aha :D oops lol okay so what i was saying

“i-i was thinking uhm like since, abroad, right?? my friend y/n y/l/n is a pilot!! and the airline she-...”

“you know y/n y/l/n??” bang si-hyuk literally asks with his eyes wide and everyone could tell that it was the positive type of shock

wait

what

everyone in the room is like divided with some nodding and some clapping excitedly and some just with their mouths agape

and that confuses jimin because

“you know y/n??”

bang si-hyuk, ceo of big hit entertainment, his boss,,,, knows you, his childhood best friend-

and it’s not like jimin is territorial when it comes to his best friends and most esp you!!!! but yeah he realizes that he is now, especially because everyone in the room apparently knows you??? and he’s only ever introduced you to the boys???? briefly?? hope and jin have yet to meet you in person???

“how could we not?” jungkook interjects with a bunny smile on his face and everything is seriously confusing jimin rn because honestly

“do you like live under a rock” yoongi has the most confused face ever to jimin’s cluelessness, the situation being ironic because normally the hyung is slower when it comes to these type of things

“y/n went viral all over the news like last week!! up to now even” it’s no joke that namjoon knows everyone that his members know but for jimin to hear joon speak about you in THIS degree offends him

because wait he’s your closest friend he should know these things

he’d like u to know that he isn’t bitter :)

and his eyes go wide at that because oH GOD WHAT DID YOU DO

everyone agrees to what namjoon said, still a bit dumb-founded as taehyung practically yanks jimin’s chair to sit closer near his and almost shoves his phone to his face

it’s you

in your pilot uniform with your luggage at tow

sunglasses at the top of your head and phone on-hand

your id still worn around your neck and

oh

jimin basically deduced all of these things with a couple swipes:

a) ok you look ethereal in those pics

b) it was supposed to be a stolen picture of this dude but you were in the background and you cOMPLETELY stole the show

c) someone zoomed in on you and edited so now basically your ethereal being got even more magnified

d) someone zoomed in on your id (he got a lil bit mad at that)

e) aha the internet loves you

f) edits and i have thirty minutes i am free this saturday retweets and digging into your images in social media EVERYTHING!!! the whole nine yards!!!!

when you woke up to that frenzy though

you literally couldn’t function for five minutes and then you started catching up and digging in on what was happening

“but i don’t look ethereal!! my skin is dry n oily at the SAME time because of cabin air and my eyes are stinging!!! i look ghastly and only a little bit fresh because of the air u get when you’re 50,000 feet up in the air!! but im-...”

oh that’s it you went viral completely on accident

you were just waiting for the free service back home your airline offers it pilots, because you brought your car to work but you were too tired to drive back home

but now you are viral in the worldwide interwebs with articles and twitter threads about you and multiple multiple DMs that make your phone freeze and

wait did your airline just email you about that :D

oh lol did beyoncé just follow you :D

basically jimin got his brothers giving him a three-minute crash course each about what happened with their managers even stepping in to gush

he basically can’t believe that he didn’t know that!! even if you didn’t mention it to him, he should’ve known because it was practically everywhere!!!!

bang si-hyuk is well-pleased and even got jimin to tell how he knew you and what you were like and he was very much :O when he got into the word that aish!!! his employee has really been living under a rock lmao

by then, the conversation about bon voyage has been slightly derailed to talk about you

who knew that jimin simply mentioning your name (lol he didn’t need to because the conversation about you was nearing anyway) would land the meeting to

“oh! actually! the airline y/n works at reached a couple of weeks ago about a proposal to get bts to star in a commercial for them!!”

and now they’re hyped because yes they endorsed clothes and food and malls and establishments but never did they endorse an AIRLINE!!! a damn airline!!!!

okay so now not only did they tackle that you would pilot for them in bon voyage

“ah! you could like also play games on the way there with y/n!!”

“wHO WILL PILOT THE PLANE THEN??? we’re gonna crash!!!”

“you’re thick, jungkook, and not in the way you think so lmao”

“maybe we could extend their vacation! shoot a skit or two with them being flight attendants for run!! one week for shooting, two weeks for resting!! two birds with one stone, really”

an airline commercial

a couple run bts! episodes

a whole season of bon voyage (with a longer production because they have longer vacation days)

more traction for them

more time than he ever wished for to be with you!! :D

soon enough the meeting is finished and it went so good that the boys were gonna be treated to a beef dinner so

everyone’s scattered and dispersed, some making small talk w him about you that makes him smile

taehyung’s lingering behind him with his hands on his back

“what is it, tae?”

the younger boy is just giggling and fiddling with his hands, a careless shrug to his shoulders

“can i have y/n’s number :D”

...

...

“aish!! if jungkook were to ask for her number, you would’ve given it to him in a heartbeat because he’s the youngest!! and-...”

“ya!! thanks for reminding hyung! jimin-hyung may i also pls have y/n’s number :D”

...

...

...

jin had to drag jimin with him bc he wasn’t done shooting the both of them glares and his cheeks were practically pink with how annoyed he was at the younger two

needless to say taehyung and jungkook didn’t have any extra portions of beef from him

he is very protective of you and even if he’s become closer with his brothers more than he’s been close with you he jUST can’t help it!!

not that he doesn’t trust them or anything

not that he doesn’t trust you either

but he doesn’t want figurative blood on his figurative ledger because he feels that it would be his responsibility if ever yOu and someone became a thing and HE was the one who inteoduced you both :(

it’s not just a him thing :( he can’t put it into words but he’s just looking out for both parties!!!

kinda figured out that taehyung may or may not have a shy little crush on you

spoiler alert: it was HUGE

for their entire dinner, every single time your name was brought up, tae instinctively has his ears perk up at the mention

simultaneously he shrinks to his seat and purses his lips and looks around to what’s being said

why are u mentioning y/n’s name?? what is happening??

and taehyung having a serious case of sweater paws doesn’t help him from jimin’s observing gaze

and yes he feels a bit sorry because taehyung kinda looks a bit upset; that little “oh :((“ on his face when jimin snapped at him so quick

he’s not gonna force him to tho,, out of respect since someone else is involved (and in this case it’s you and your number)

jimin nudges him by the shoulder to get his attention

everyone’s passed out at this point because the beef was so damn good

tae kinda looks spaced out so he turns his head immediately and he forgot for a second that he was supposed to be cold with jimin

“what?”

“..... do you still want y/n’s number?”

taehyung almost fALLS out of his chair as he nods eagerly, making jimin shake his head to himself as he hesistantly takes out his phone from his pocket

oh god jimin’s phone is on his hand now oh god that’s your picture oh god that’s your number oH-

“i’m not gonna text her tonight if that’s you’re worried about?? i mean we barely know each other!! consider me asking for her number to be used for future references only :D”

“what does future references even mean?”

...

“... luggage. i want y/n’s luggage bag.”

...

“i also want y/n’s-...”

“BUTT OUT JUNGKOOK!! BUTT !! OUT !!”

when you open up your company’s email to you, you really can’t help but to feel nervous

today was your off-day and they specifically requested that you come to the main office at 10 AM sharp

and in your off-day, you aren’t even awake at that time of the morning!!

it wss both a blessing and a curse that you slept early the night before so your body clock just went “lol u wake up early today get up at 6”

and not to mention the fact that it was the same day you learned that you went viral last night when you were peacefully asleep

so the last few hours have been WILD and it kinda put you into shock

the closest you’ve ever been to fame was having your pictures leaked with jimin when you were still kids!!

if you were lucky enough, your face would be covered by every possible animal emoji that was ever released

apart from that, it was the occassional mention of your name in stan twitter and that was it

but THIS type of fame is on a whole another level!! higher than being tagged as jimin’s best friend outside of bts!! higher than having your face covered with animal emojis

when you thought that you were gonna be fired over being viral for some reason unbeknownst —

even if you know that you haven’t violated anything and if anything, you were the one who got violated because someone uploaded a picture of you without your consent!!!

so when you learn that they aren’t mad at all and ecstatic in fact

because your airline basically got free publicity and promotion just because you looked so good in pictures that weren’t even intentional

and that there is a more than noticeable spike in the bookings of flights

and that people were cALLING to ask if you would be the one to pilot that flight

AND RIVAL AIRLINES WERE CALLING IN TO ASK WHEN YOUR CONTRACT WOULD EXPIRE

and that said rival airlines were pitching in salaries that competed with your paycheck now aND THAT THEY WERE EVEN higher

needless to say that your day was more than eventful

you don’t know how to cope up with it either so while the meeting drags on to talk about your newfound fame you’re just :O the entire time

“i believe that park jimin from bts is a close friend of yours, correct?”

wAIT what

you shouldn’t be shocked by now because practically everyone’s familiar with him and the rest of the boys

but it still takes you off-guard because as much as he is your friend

and as much you admit that you miss jimin :(

or that you haven’t talked to him as much these past few days

you genuinely don’t see the connection of why jimin would be brought up into this conversation that doesn’t involve him in the first place

there’s a self-pitying realization in between that it seems like your only determining factor these days was to be known as a best friend of a kpop idol and nothing else

:(

that’s a sad topic you’d rather not delve in at the moment

:(

“prior to you being catapulted into fame suddenly — we reached out to their company for them to become our endorsers. a commercial and a billboard and some other things.”

“and this is just the pERFECT timing because you’re famous now and people love you!!!”

this was it

the stars were aligning for you

not only do you get to hang out with jimin, but now you’re launched into much more job opportunities!!

when the meeting concluded, you narrow it down to the conclusions that:

a) you’re most likely to film a commercial and some adverts and perhaps be included in a billboard with them (their company has yet to confirm within the week but your ceo ji-eun is damn sure at this point or else she will flip

b) you’re now getting an agent :D because apparently offers have been waiting for you left and right and they already got you one before you even said “yeah sure i guess???”

c) you’re getting a RAISE

d) sooner or later you’re gonna do this photoshoot so your own company could post about you this time

e) interviews. you’re gonna be asked to chat your heart out intentionally. i n t e r v i e w s

and it’s a humbling moment for sure because it’s like 

oh. you didn’t mean for this to happen but it’s here now and you can make the most of this while it’s still here!! you get to do what you love and be with the people you love and basically get paid for it!!

oh is this what jimin feels like all the time then??

maybe you should apply as the 8th member of bts

it’s during an intentionally cold night in your apartment that your phone basically vibrates itself off the table

right when you were still in the bathroom taking your time because you were getting PR!! and the mask you just put on happens to be something you’ve been curious about but it was too expensive for you to be curious about lol

also: curiosity that leads you to buy either new skincare products or makeup are either a godsend or a godforsaken situation because 6 out of 10 times you do that, you breakout!!! 

the sound of something clattering to the ground immediately makes you scramble towards your living room, phone flipped over to see jimin up close, eyes even in a picture enough to intimidate you for not answering immediately

“Y/N!!!”

“JIMIN!!!”

the both of you put each other on speaker mode because while you didn’t want to risk ruining your mask, the rest of the boys wanna listen in

the entire phone call was so intense because even in speaker mode you were still yelling at each other

and it was spent with so much enthusiasm on trying to catch up with the past days and jimin apologizing profusely because he’s been living under a rock

“i can’t believe it!! I CAN FINALLY RIDE IN ON A FLIGHT YOU’RE GONNA PILOT”

what

wait

“... jimin what do you mean”

because as far as you knew, the airline commercial would be done with a green screen to ensure that it’s of the best quality

not a gopro type of thing because ur flight attendants would yell real-time to the camera crew and the boys when they try to do something and the seatbelt sign is still on!!!

“wait jimin i think y/n wasn’t supposed to know that yet”

you hear a voice in the background and it’s very much familiar and it’s now hitting you that there’s an audience for your entire call

“namjoon, is that you???”

“Y/N IT’S ME!!! NAMJOON!! OMG”

and then you hear this scuffle over the line and a very slight commotion

it’s jimin holding his phone away with his arm and the other fending off namjoon while hobi scrambles to steal it back

jin is helplessly saying hello to you in the background while jungkook is hopping around going all “miss y/n i am a fan of you!!!”

taehyung is going all sweater paws again while yoongi is desperately trying to shut them up because he’s still listening into yours and jimin’s conversation and he’s genuinely engrossed ok

and now everyone’s calm and collected especially since jimin gives them a death glare each and nobody admits but angry jimin scares the shit out of them

he’s back to being soft-spoken now because he realizes that he may have slipped in saying information he probably shouldn’t have yet, a sheepish scratch at the back of his head

“uhm well you see you’re gonna fly us over for bon voyage and uhm kinda stick around for some pieces here and there?? uhm that’s from what i know hehe”

right now you’re just blanking out and staring into the distance and you’ve suddenly gone awfully quiet

yoongi’s on the background like “yo i think you just broke her”

“is y/n’s cell broken? i’m gonna get her a new one”

“is she okay?? wHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENED TO HER???”

“jimin-hyung you said y/n sometimes forgets to lock her door right??”

it’s once again another frenzy and once you realize that you’ve blanked out, you immediately shush them and they miraculously do

it’s a feeling of being overwhelmed and disbelief because this is more than you’ve ever asked for

to think that just last week you were tired and was about to pull off an AWOL because your off-day couldn’t have come nearer

“i certainly didn’t know that”

and there’s a nervous chuckle and a nervous silence that encompasses and for a moment, jimin frowns because he thinks that this is all too much for you and you’re gonna turn down the offer even before it’s gonna be officially pitched to you at a meeting tomorrow (you have yet to know that there’s gonna be another meeting tomorrow)

“oh my god i get to be with the lot of you!!!”

one excited shriek from you and that’s all it takes for hell to break loose

“JIMIN I MISSED YOU SO MUCH I CAN’T WAIT TO WHACK YOUR HEAD AGAIN”

“i can fINALLY meet jin and hope!!”

“where’s namjoon?? this old lady from one of my flights own a stall at the airport and she’s afraid of riding in airplanes! and i was apparently so good and she wasn’t scared and that she waited for me outside the cockpit! she gave me a written note saying that i could come to her stall anytime and the bOOKS I’M GONNA CHOOSE WILL BE FREE OF CHARGE EVERY SINGLE TIME”

“yoongi if you’re hearing this; i heard kyle kuzma’s gonna fly first class next week and i fly that same aircraft do u want me to ask for an autograph”

“we have a boatload of dog treats we give for lil ones we have onboard so they stay behaved!! taehyung can have them for yeontan”

“tell jungkook that he can finally have my walkie-talkie he’s been bugging me about!! i have a new one anyway”

it’s official

they love you

they are practically swooning right now and are mad at jimin because wHY DIDN’T YOU LET US KNOW Y/N SOONER 

they only met you a couple times in the past and hobi and jin are jealous because atleast they got to meet you :((

and all of them are willing to take a splinter for you no doubt 

everyone goes to sleep that night all warm and fuzzy and content

not to mention taehyung being so giddy about what you said

not only did you think of him you also thought about yeontan aNd you haven’t even met the little devil yet!!

and he isn’t the only one who thinks of this but

there’s just something about you that is so warm and so genuine

like you could be as introverted as yoongi and be as much of a team player and and extrovert as taehyung is when needed be

but the point is that there’s always something about you for everyone that makes them gravitated towards you

of course jimin explains this to you and you basically shut him off

“aish don’t put me in a pedestal because i swear that i’m not that special”

“why won’t you believe me??”

“because it isn’t true now eat your cereal jimin i will pinch you thru the screen”

the meeting comes soon enough and you have to pretend that this was your first time hearing this bit of information

the pilot you were helping learn the ropes, hyunjin, will take over your normal workload for the meantime!!

in less than one week’s time, you have to pack your bags for three-ish weeks!! because as from what you can tell, things are gonna be a bit more hectic for you because you’re not only gonna fly planes

for a run episode, the boys are gonna be your flight attendants in a mock flight with the passengers as staff members

but the plane being in the air and them wearing flight attendant uniforms will be very much real

and then another episode to be squeezed in with them trying out flight simulators and quizzed with aviation facts 

and whether u did the best or the worst with the two-part episode

they’re still gonna go skydiving :)

they’re really milking out the sky motif but ok it wasn’t your show anyway and you were just gonna guest so they can go off by all means

after all that work, you’re gonna fly them off again but it’s for bon voyage this time!!

they basically res for two-ish weeks and you can tag along behind the scenes because i mean like you’re flying them home too so might as well

get some clips in between to be used for the commercial

and said commercial would be shot a few days after you all get back from said vacation!!

that’s it narrowed down and as you were taking notes, you can’t help but to feel very excited and nervous at the same time

a few days pass and it’s finally time!! yeah sure run episode but JIMIN AND THE BOYS CAN FINALLY SEE YOU NOW

you were supposed to reunite in the aircraft itself but jimin is an impatient baby which is why he’s called you insistently to say some excuse of “you have to go back to the empty boarding gate u need to meet your camera director”

lol but in truth you really don’t need to and where they are now is what you need to pass to get to said boarding gate

so when jimin sees you by the jet bridge they were all at, he sprints

like actually SPRINTS to get to you 

and he attacks you with a massive bear hug and sprinkles you with noisy cheek kisses

“Y/N *kiss* I *kiss* MISSED *kiss* YOU *kiss* SO *kiss* MUCH *kiss*”

no lie you really did miss him too

and once you get him to calm down because he was crushing your bones and you return his cheek kisses

the boys are all just looking at the scene in front of them with awe

jungkook’s looking at namjoon with his eyes saying “lol imma do that too” and namjoon’s staring back going “NO”

taehyung’s extra pouty right now

he didn’t conisder the fact that maybe you and jimin were an unspoken thing and that his crush on you is now something he shouldn’t hold onto

he got discouraged very quickly

hobi is waddling to you at full-speed and goes for a hug which is wild move for someone who he’s just met (but u don’t mind)

“you’re adorable your uniform is so cute omg”

jin goes in for a hug too and you say something along the lines of “i could see the handsomeness they were talking about” and he goes absolutely rED

he’s laughing uncontrollably like a seal 

namjoon was about to go in for a hug but then he sees your wrist and-

“iS THAT A KAWS WATCH???”

“OH MY GOD YOU NOTICED???”

“HOW COULDN’T I? THAT’S LIKE LIMITED EDITION HOW DID YOU GET IT”

“I HAVE A FRIEND THAT’S A COLLECTOR HE GIFTED IT TO ME I CAN GET YOU CONNECTED TOO”

you are now being wrapped with namjoon’s long arms 

he doesn’t seem to be letting go of you soon

yoongi just has his arms wide and his eyes in a faux irritated manner

“what are you looking at”

and then his gummy smile appears when you just cave into his hug and jin is like??? “aH! y/n’s power is unparalleled”

jungkook immediately goes in for an embrace and even twirls you around

“ooh!! you have more piercings now than the last time i saw you!”

“i can pierce ears now!!”

“jungkook can you really”

“lmao no”

and now that it seems like hugging is the new norm, and taehyung being the last in line for you to greet, that kinda burns your nerves becauseif you were to “admit, you may or may not have a little crush on taehyung ever since the first time jimin introduced the both of you to each other

so you do the sensible thing and don’t think about it

no thoughts head empty head first

“tae!!!”

“aha y/n :D”

you hug him and well

taehyung blanked at that and panicked internally

the stark difference of your enthusiasm and his timid response was cringeworthy and it makes you screw your eyes shut as you hug him

but the moment tae realizes this, he holds on as you were trying to let go of him as qUICK as possible because it was too awkward for you to bear

and a little crushing if you were being honest

taehyung now takes first place for wanting to be reincarnated as a rock in the next life

after yoongi seeing that interaction he was just like ᵒᵒᶠ

before it goes anymore awkward though and tae starts squawking, jimin thankfully whisks you away 

“you look so badass in your uniform will u let me wear it”

“let me wear your hoops and i’ll let u borrow”

“lol forget that i even asked”

no matter what, jimin doesn’t let you borrow his earrings!!

like even if the boys borrow some from him time to time

he absolutely does not let you borrow and when you ask why, he just rolls his eyes and smacks his lips and goes N-O

and then eventually he has to shoo you out because they have to film the intro at the jet bridge and you’re not supposed to be there really

jungkook excitedly squeezes you again and goes “see you later!!”

jeon jungkook knows what he’s doing

so right before the cameras start rolling, he’s just staring at the side of taehyung’s face in close proximity with a teasing smile on his face and then wiggles his eyebrows in the slightest when tae finally returns his stare with a knowing glare

“what was that awhile ago, hyung?”

“one more word out of ur mouth and i’m ratting you out to-...”

“i was just kidding hehe don’t rat me out to namjoon that i accidentally stained his precious table hehe pls”

and he blinks at that and is taken aback

because that was supposed to be an empty threat

and now that jungkook realizes he’s fallen smack-dab into the trap, he now wants to ignite himself

taehyung now has blackmail material :D

jungkook is now held captive by said blackmail material :D

they eventually get done with their intro and into the aircraft itself!! jimin is the one to introduce you and throughout the whole ordeal they’re just hyped-up bc it’s the first time they get to do this type of episode

and they’re doing it with you so that’s a plus

and they get changed into their custom flight attendant attire

snug pink get-up with a silk navy blue scarf tied around as the uniform’s collar 

and golden nameplates engraved with their names on it

and AIR BANGTAN embroidered into the breast pocket!!

they looked absolutely good

your work would be lighter if only they were your actual flight attendants

you’d work every single day

even though they could be tiresome at times bc they could be all over the place

taehyung was admittedly swooning the whole time

the production staff made you alter your speech a bit so you could insert air bangtan and introduce all seven of them individually for the skit

and then everyone’s briefed with what they have to do and how safety should be the no. 1 priority

and then it’s takeoff time!!!!

jimin is really really proud of you

he takes advantage of this as his bragging rights

“aha that’s my best friend who’s flying the plane we are in right now :)”

“lol i love y/n i was best friends with her first :)”

“best take-off ever in your life amirite :)”

“i’m friends with a pilot in case you didn’t know :) no big deal”

“technically that’s captain jimin to you too now :)”

it was a fun and a chaotic episode

a bit unsafe? yes

but then the icing at the top was taehyung swooning at everything you did and cussing at himself every time he remembers how he screwed up earlier

he is the most behaved person in this flight and he wants you to know that :((

yoongi’s mercilessly teasing him

“y/n’s gonna come out to do her landing speech soon; you should pretend reading the safety manual now”

“somebody give taehyung a barf bag and a pen he’s gonna ask for an autograph from y/n”

“ey jimin do they sell y/n’s perfume in this flight?? someone just wants to ask”

the episode wraps soon enough but not without jimin rowding everyone to CLAP FOR THE PILOT WHO ALSO HAPPENS TO BE MY BEST FRIEND AHA EVERYTHING WAS SO SMOOTH SO COMFY QUICK TAKE A PICTURE OF ME N MY PILOT BEST FRIEND :D

and there’s just this innate feeling everyone feels every once in a while

that everything feels so right and so complete

it’s like complete nirvana

and before you know it, bon voyage is already happening

a vacation with seven best friends (jimin insists that he has the superlative best when you’re talking about them as friends) 

(and maybe one of them you don’t see as a best friend and perhaps something more and that person really doesn’t show much enthusiasm for you as you do for him)

(it’s taehyung)

and it’s not like taehyung isn’t fond of you

in fact, he very much is!! believe him!!

it’s just that he’s paralyzed over his crush on you and the fact that he sees you often because of these circumstances and he can’t believe it

too paralyzed over the fact that he might and may have already made a fool out of himself

and that he’s afraid to make moves on you with the boys here because jESUS CHRIST

he knows he would be teased mercilessly or he would be teased mercilessly while they help him out but they would never let him live this down

and jimin

oh god jimin

because as much as jimin loves him, he knows that one wrong move on you and he knows he’s gonna yeet him to the han river

he doesn’t know either what would be jimin’s reaction if he knew of his crush on you!! will he flip? will he be happy? wILL HE FORBID HIM FROM SEEING YOU EVER AGAIN????

at times he could be very overbearing

and he admits that

but all for good cause as he tries to explain

oh and jungkook

damn jungkook

he’s caught on pretty quickly about tae’s crush on you

and kook likes you but not in the way tae likes you

it’s just a fuzzy, warm, and platonic type of like like what the other boys have for you

but with fLIRTINESS

jimin’s the same but it was natural since you’ve been friends for absolutely ages

jungkook’s however was very fresh and very aBRUPT

it’s him trying to get a rise from taehyung and urging him to just make a damn move on you

he hopes that his flirtiness with you would just intimidate his hyung to the point that “open your eyes!!! oh what am i doing?? don’t you feel that i’m trying to steal y/n away from you?? MAKE A MOVE!!” gets across

taehyung has yet to realize that though

bon voyage doesn’t really include you (as you also try to remove yourself out of the picture as much as possible)

the cameras aren’t always turned on and not all hours of the day are spent on filming

so they can still get to do things and activities without staff members flooding the house!!

the house you’re all staying at is a gigantic one

so it got divided into two wings and you can even close it off!!

one wing solely for the boys and the other for you and the production staff

you were at their wing more often than you are in yours though

and during these past few days that turned into weeks, you’ve been closer to them more than you could imagine

they were easy to get around with!! them knowing that jimin knows you is a plus factor if you think about it

and even if not for that fact, they still think not much would’ve changed in your present friendship dynamic right now

it was comforting to be with them, really

the other way around!!

and you could also hang out with them either individually or as a group and it wouldn’t be awkward!!

.. taehyung may or may not be a slight issue though

you honestly think that he hates you :(

and you’re trying to backtrack your actions to see if you may have done something to him

you always try to keep up with his energy

jungkook was fooling around with a drone and trying to experiment flying it

and then he suddenly had this idea of “tae do you think you could outrun my drone”

and kook’s whipping his head around for you as if in a silent question to ask “wait is that possible”

and you’re just over there narrowing your eyes like “jungkook just because i’m a pilot,,,,, it doesn’t mean i know every flying object in the air and how to operate it,,,,,”

...

“but y/n can you outrun my drone tho”

it’s the sudden challenge that takes you aback and makes your eyebrow raise

and then it’s become a cHALLENGE

taehyung’s competitiveness making him forget that you’re even there and that he’s not acting all conscious

so it’s literally all fun and laughter

and the both of you may or may not be so caught up into this stupid challenge you stupidly both participated to

you’re not even sure if there was a rEWARD for this

so stupidly caught up to the point that jungkook’s already led the both of you to the beach that you were overlooking from the house you all stayed at

(jungkook’s running with the drone and that completely destroys the purpose of the drone but he’s having fun too ok)

before you knew it, both you and tae are crashing full-speed into the beach and it takes a collective second for you to realize that you both were indeed wet when you’re hip-deep into the water

and it sends another burst of laughter and you’re just looking at him helplessly and out of breath

“oh my god i didn’t even-...”

it hits taehyung now that he’s having full-on eye contact with you on what the fuck is he doing

he just immediately tenses and all the alarms in his head are going off

‘hahahaha yes :)”

and there it is again

that noticeable shift in the air that makes your mouth dry at what could you have possibly done

he’s quick on walking himself out of the water, quite literally leaving you there

jungkook’s by the shoreline laughing himself to death and sees taehyung waddling himself out

“hYUNG OMG YOU DIDN’T EVEN-...”

ok what was that

what the fuck was that

he only gets a blank laugh in return and it’s a dampener for his mood right now

and it only sinks in now that why is taehyung returning by himself

“y/n did you drown????”

no you didn’t drown

but the idea did seem enticing because you felt so embarrassed and down with what just happened

so right now jungkook just has his arm around your shoulders as he’s trying to figure everything out

“did i -- did i do something wrong?”

and even if the context isn’t clear. he immediately says no

the both of you are just walking back to the house while the sun sets and he still isn’t sure of what happened but he knows that it’s enough to make you sad and most probably has something to do with taehyung

he just wants to cheer you up :(

so mid-way he kinda picks you up wordlessly and you don’t fight him about it

you’re completely drained of your energy both physically and emotionally

you melt into jungkook’s grasp on you as your way of thanks and he acknowledges it with a squeeze on your arm

by the time you get back, everyone’s just doing their own thing because it’s nearing dinner

kook kinda plops you into the couch yoongi’s sitting on

his eyes question that something’s kinda off but he doesn’t question it

and you just crawl the short distance so that you’re laying on his lap and be sad in peace there

all he does it just past your head once and that’s it

and he’s just watching a replay of a basketall game because he hasn’t had time to catch up with those championship games (even if he knows who won and who lost)

and out of the blue yoongi just hears you softly pipe in

“my ex is a professional basketball player”

“wHO’S YOUR EX WHAT KIND OF PROFESSIONAL ARE-...”

and you shush him bc you don’t want anybody else to know

“omg jimin doesn’t know this?? and i’m like the first one to know?”

“yes”

oh and he kinda huddles because after all, this is a secret and it does have something to do with basketball

“professional as in he played in this show you’re watching rn”

“is he in this game????”

“lol no from what i know, he got injured even before championship but yeah his team’s playing right now”

“what’s his name???”

“theo. i call him theo”

and then that name sounds awfully familiar and he’s specifically requesting to see what he looked like and even tries to get hobi to look for your phone

but your pictures with him are all deleted now so you just make yoongi search up his name and he’s like :O

“....... why did you break up then..,,.,”

and then you just gently explain that it was a mutual decision and that both your jobs were demanding

so yeah it was impossible to happen

and yoongi forgot that fifteen minutes ago, jungkook just plopped you here because you wanted to lie down and were too sad to function

and he made you retell what happened to you and your ex that only he knows about

so he feels a little guilty

“you don’t have to speak if you don’t want to :(”

and you just wave him off that catches him off-guard

“nah it’s all okay :)”

man were u selfless

yoongi now loves you more

jin and namjoon finish dinner soon enough and everybody goes down to eat

even taehyung who’s with jimin

and it doesn’t even look like something’s wrong

but jimin’s counting all the heads in the room and was like ‘wAit where’s y/n???”

he sees you getting yourself out from lying in yoongi’s lap and he’s there with you in a heartbeat cooing at you

“y/n baby what happened”

and you’re back to lying down again but this time it’s jimin pushing you to lie on his shoulder as he’s stroking your hair

you said “nothing”, you know...,,., like a liar

jimin throws yoongi a questioning look and the older boy just shrugs his shoulders because he doesn’t know either

taehyung’s abandoned at the edge of the stairs

and you were about to scoff but that obviously doesn’t hurt as much when he abandoned you hip-deep into the water

“mhmmm i see :D”

jimin most definitely knows you’re lying but he doesn’t want to prod into it because it’s obvious that you weren’t in the mood to be questioned

at this point he’s just trying to cheer you up but in the same time give you sustenance

he’s literally feeding you right now

jin cooked up a lot of box mac n’ cheese (he transferred it into actual bowls) from the conveniece store and you know what

he wanted to try it out

it is not the healthiest thing in the world but atleast it’s somehow foreign right???? 

as much as jimin loves you, he does want to eat though

so he asked jungkook to get him a big-ass bowl with a portion big enough for the both of you and he did just that 

but you aren’t that much cooperative because you’re not eating that much and jimin is really really enticed with the smell of the food rn and jungkook senses that

“i’ll feed her, hyung!! go get another spoon for you or something”

he is really thankful for that so he just pushes the bowl to kook and scrambles for a utensil and perhaps even his own bowl

jungkook’s feeding you now and without jimin sending you a questioning glance every two seconds, you’re more cooperative 

taehyung is sitting by the far corner of the couch parallel to yours and he is CLENCHING

and he’s groaning to his mac n’ cheese and namjoon is ??? why are you like this ???

“good. it tastes so good.”

he nods but he’s still sending tae a questioning look

you eventually gained the appetite to eat

but jungkook was in charge of the dishes tonight and he doesn’t want to wash one more spoon so he insisted that you just share one instead

taehyung is gonna COMBUST

he is now practically yelling into his mac n’ cheese

everyone is now ??? at him and he makes a show of just shoving the bits of pasta to his mouth

“jin-hyung :) namhoon-hyung :) this is so delicious :) how did you do this :)”

“...... taehyung that’s instant,,,, boiled water and the cheese powder...,.,”

“aHA so that’s why :)”

his actions are v fishy and v funny 

but deep down he is boiling angry and frustrated both at himself and a jungkook

kook is giggling to the bowl right now that you had to pry it away from him

you’re not even LOOKING at taehyung’s direction

usually you did

but your will to treat him like how he treats you is stronger

that’s it that’s gonna be the rest of the trip

if there’s any personality trait you’re gonna pick up from jimin from having been his friend for so long

it would be the stubbornness

you avoid taehyung like the flu

AND HE NOTICES THAT

AND THE BOYS ARE STARTING TO NOTICE IT TOO

jimin is the one most on-guard about that 

and he is whispering to everyone except taehyung 

“if you see something that relates to y/n and taehyung tell me ok tELL ME!!!”

and even tae feels sad about it to the point that he’s trying to make a conscious effort in making conversation with you

when you’re on the floor with your laptop turned on and they’re surrounding you trying to help you out with your emails

emails that don’t relate to aviation work and more-on to the viral side of things such as designer !!! brands !!! reaching out to you personally instead of your agent!!!

“mhmm they have really good shoes. what’s your favorite color anyway?”

and he says that in the midst of voices overlapping bUt the boys realized that taehyung gave input into the conversation and wAS LIKe wait wait tae’s speaking shut up shut up

but jimin answers for you in a heartbeat and hobi pinches his arm and he was laughing suddenly

he’s looking around trying to say something with eyes

“lol i’m sorry did i ruin his move on y/n”

and his subconscious-

“WAIT WHAT TAEHYUNG IS MAKING MOVES ON Y/N???”

it takes all four of his hyungs to plead him to shut up with their glares and don’t make this anymore awkward as tae wants to be swallowed wholly by the ground

your resolute will doesn’t crumble until jimin makes it his ultimate mission to find a drink that’s gonna sink you

because your alcohol tolerance was brought up again when they were talking about buying drinks

and jimin tells the story of how you outdrank him one night and didn’t wake up with a deadlier hangover than he did aNd he was still curious to how you did it

you don’t know either but you’re as interested as them in finding a drink that’s gonna sink you

hobi’s random pick in the grocery store did JUST that

you finally sunk

you finally got as drunk as jimin’s level

as in a shit-faced type and not just a happy buzz you usually felt

you and jin have been laughing without end for five minutes now

no one even joked

you just made eye contact with each other and you both immediately started to wheeze 

he was starting to get so red he looked borderline pURPLE if you were still seeing clearly

yoongi was laughing by seeing the two of you laugh because it was starting to get contagious at the point 

by now namjoon’s back was being slapped carelessly by yoongi who’s pleased with himself

taehyung has a grin on his face because you were so adorable

as if his cheeks weren’t warm enough just by seeing you so happy and bubbly

and the heat in his chest isn’t just because of the alcohol nor the warmth his sweater provided

maybe this isn’t a little crush anymore :((

while he’s ignoring that possibility, everyone else is considering it

everyone besides you :((

jimin’s on his feet at the moment because oh my god it’s happening!!!

good news because you’re drunk out of your mind

and bad news that you’re drunk out of your mind

so he’s tending to you with a glass of water and you won’t drink it

he’s trying harder this time by putting the glass to your lips but you were flailing around so much by laughing that it spilled some to you and jimin himself

he’s now looking for a straw

this one’s for boba but he has to settle for this now

and he’s trying to coax you into drinking it

hE’S EVEN USING A VOICE HE USES FOR BABIES

“but water tastes like nothing :((”

“which is exactly what you need”

“but i want it to taste like something”

he’s about to groan but then he sees your eyes glossing 

and oh god did he hear a whimper

“y/N BABY DON’T CRY OK OK WHAT DO YOU WANT????”

he’s now looking for an ice cold chocolate drink that isn’t overly sweet

namjoon has made it his personal decision to follow jimin around

and with his twofold clumsiness at this state, yoongi follows him but not without holding on to the back of jooni’s shirt so he could be slid around

jin stands up and follows them but he’s not sure why

“why are you all -- this is NOT a conga line!!!”

hobi’s staring into the distance turned into snoring

taehyung isn’t all that drunk

but you, on the other hand, are very much drunk

tae’s not sure to why you’re approaching him

maybe it’s because the hoodie he’s wearing now is jungkook’s

maybe it’s because jimin’s scent is on his hair from having borrowed his shampoo

maybe it’s because you’re drunk and your first thought is him even if drunk

but all his thoughts fly out the door when you’re squeezing yourself into the couch he’s lying on at the very moment

one that’s too small for the two of you and that he had to grab you split-second because you were about to fall out of the couch so hard if not for his strong grip that holds you

“y/n.”

taehyung’s not sure either to what his tone contained

whether it was for warning or for reprimanding, literally all his thoughts are crushed once again the moment you speak

“you’re voice is very deep.”

he’s not sure if you know this either but you were unconsciously cuddling up to his side, filling in the gap at the couch that just made you barely fit

you’re

cuddling

him

“a-and it’s very calming.”

he’s not sure to why but the moment you put your hand on his chest because you were basically almost lying on top of him

his first instinct was to put his hand on the small of your back

and the moment and the feelings were so warm that fuck this isn’t the alcohol anymore

nor the sweater

so warm to the point that the both of you don’t notice jimin’s :O and everyone else’s :D

because the make-shift conga line has arrived right in front of where you are and hobi just woke up

and right when everything feels surreal 

taehyung watches a split-second decision happen right in your eyes

you just kissed the tip of his nose

:’)

taehyung thinks he’s gonna ascend to heaven

it’s the softest moment ever because you pull away trying to gauge his reaction

he’s all red with his bottom lip in between his teeth and oh my god his eyes are so expressive

jimin steps in tho

and he clears his throat and taehyung iS SUDDENLY BACK TO EARTH

oh my god oh my god that just happened oh my god

this is a bit more scary and intimidating now

because jimin doesn’t look neither thrilled nor angry

he looks neutral

neutral blank-faced on the verge of who knows what jimin is the most frightening jimin

“hey baby here’s your chocolate drink you asked for :)”

and with just a head rub you immediately come to your senses and are already making grabby hands to the cold mug (with a straw!!) and you’re scrambling to stand up and jimin’s helping you to stay stable because you’re attached to him now

taehyung is now looking at his hands as if they were the most entertaining things in the world “wow look at my rings i have never seen them before so shiny so silver”

and he knows jimin can see right through him

jimin has the tiniest hands out of all of them while he has the largest

and u know what

he could be still strangled with those same hands 

and u know what too

maybe he’ll accept that wrath because he kinda deserves it  

he’s sent a brief look that’s enough to let him know that the both of them will talk

that taehyung shouldn’t leave this couch

nor leave this house

nor this country

you know what maybe tae better start timing his record on how long he can go without breathing

he can do that for a minute and a half underwater

soon enough jimin finally tucks you in with not much protest

much force from him tho but much more apologies and coos when he apologizes and you do as asked

got to make u brush your teeth and change into a fresh set of pajamas

he has to trick you into “seokjin would be mad at u when he learns that you went to sleep with dirty clothes on”

and him being the good friend that he is

since he also achieved of getting to sink you with a drink

he’s gonna go the extra mile

went so far as to wipe you with a wet towel and dry you off since you didn’t want to shower and he’s afraid ur probably gonna fall asleep not even midway

he even does your skincare routine for you

you kept giggling when he was patting your face so he did it more but now you were in the verge of tearing because in your drunk state you tHOught he was slapping you over and over again with both palms at the same time

and after all that

jimin finally gets around with taehyung on the couch and the younger boy just immediately straightens his posture

...

“...,.,., so you and y/n.,.”

there are literally no words in his mouth

“aha yes me and y/n :D”

and it’s a habit of tae’s to be incoherent whenever he’s flustered

that kinda doesn’t help his case because jimin needs ALL of his brainpower and coherence

“what are your intentions?”

“uhm i uhm aha :D great pilot. no jet lag.”

he’s nodding even there isn’t something to nod at

god he didn’t even drink much but he feels just as floaty and as spent

“calm down, taehyung.”

he SOBERS at that

jimin even pats at his knee to try and ground him

“y-you’re not mad at me??”

“lol i kinda am to be honest”

:(

“but i’m only mad because you treated her from the start as if you didn’t like her!!”

“but hyung you knOw it’s hard and -- wait was it really obvious??”

“there’s a difference between being shy AND being an insensitive ass that leaves the room whenever she enters!!!”

“but-...”

“and i know that people cope with things differently but your mechanism with your little crush on y/n was just kinda off for her, y’know? like this is the time she genuinely gets to know you and not just a five-second introduction by me!! and it’s just kinda a ballsy move because she just got to know you in this level and you’re acting like an ass and she doesn’t know why!!”

“ok but-...”

“and ok the boys and i aren’t mad that you kept from us because it was pretty obvious but i mEAN like you could have just went to us, ya know?? even if some would give poor advice, it’s the thought that counts!!”

“jimin-...”

“oH also what if y/n fell for jungkook instead of you, huh??? he has balls and he doesn’t even like her in that way!!”

this effectively shuts tae up because he hasn’t really considered that possibility

and it’s a dunk at sobering reality that each one of these days he let pass could have been the moment but it was just him hindering himself

because he is a shy boi for you and the crippling fear of rejection just always paralyzes him

aND NOW THAT TONIGHT HAPPENED!!!

with his nose still tingling and his cheeks still flushed because of that kiss

with somehow permission from jimin

with you in the picture now and everything in place

taehyung really can’t help but pout adorably and cry up tears of happiness a bit

jimin hugs him for that with a pat on his back

they both know though that even without any verbal warning that jimin will give taehyung hell if ever he breaks your heart

tae kinda pales at the realization because it may be a conflict of interest

and jimin would be like

lol :) why would you be afraid of me when you have no intention of hurting her :) 

tae SWEARS he could hear jimin in his head and he was about to reply but he realizes that he’s just a little bit worried and much more overwhelmed

needless to say that things really did do change overnight

you were trashed yet thankful that you remembered most of how the night went including that bit in which you were drunkenly topping and cuddling taehyung then pressing a soft little kiss to the tip of his nose

you could still hear your internal monlogue of “boop :D” when you kissed him

you’re woken up by the boys (yoongi included because it turned out you slept in for much longer) since today was a no-film day and they basically get to do anything in this vacation without it being documented and such

it was just a never-ending warm feeling with tae

throughout the whole day he was just grinning at you and maintaining eye contact and at times when you’re not even doing anything

(he’s glued to your side much to the grumpiness of jimin)

it was a slow burn at most

bumping shoulders and squeezing of wrists 

having his hand casually on the small of your back and around your shoulders

taehyung scrunching his nose SO MUCH

hobi is genuinely concerned

“tae do u have a cold??”

yoongi is fucking relentless

“what? what? what did the good boy smell???”

seokjin keeps pursing his lips intentionally after trying to gain tae’s attention and he = would shrug his shoulders excessively

“i saw that u little punk i SAW that”

namjoon would be on tune with how yoongi just won’t stop

“tie that bandana around your neck instead and sTOP sniffling”

jungkook would roll his eyes and scoff playfully whenever taehyung would glance at him

“do i need to kiss y/n so you’d be jealous enough to do so??”

jimin would be the mediator with all the teases but that doesn’t exactly mean he’s on tae’s side either bc the one time taehyung bragged that jimin was protecting him, he got whacked on the side of the head

“lol no this isn’t for u taehyung,, i’m just doing this because y/n’s cheeks are so hot and they’re burning a hole on my shoulder”

as much as your relationship was slowly but surely blossoming with taehyung

it happened for the boys as well!! even with jimin who you didn’t even think was possible to get closer to

bonding with jin was spontaneity and strict adherance to plans combined

“jin do u know milktpapi on twitter”

“bubble would have been a better name for that puppy”

following twitter recipes that are fast-paced and a little vague became a big hit for the both of you

he went on a watching binge one night and the morning after there were just paper bags on the counter of ingredients upon ingredients that he so sweetly asked the staff to get for him

DC CUPCAKES!!!!!!!

he liked that there has to be some type of drama between those two sisters

jin would just be ranting to you with no end

“they were on CONEy island,,, C O N E ,,,, and she made cupcakes in cONES but they still chose the sister who thought hAMBURGERS,,, in C O N E y island,,,, was a good idea!!!”

another inside game was to guess the personification of inanimate things but to food

“what must sadness taste like”

jin and you and the never-ending bickering between the two of you almost always fills in as white noise

yoongi and you are rather a quite dynamic duo

and as hobi explains that you could just really really catch on with his tempo

like at times they would just catch the two of you lying on the same couch but at the opposite ends with your feet meeting in the middle

awake and in complete silence

jungkook has his eyes squinted

“why are you texting each other????”

and it has him genuinely baffled but he’s just answered with a grumble and he CAN’T tell whether it’s from you or yoongi

just like with jin, there’s also a food approach

“that dumpling kinda looks like namjoon”

“i was JUST about to say that”

it wasn’t a showy type of friendship with yoongi; rather a more silent concern type of thing and the occasional hug

love language with him seems to be the both of you having a drum-off because he has a nervous habit of tapping his fingers

and he’s v thankful because oh :) you’ve just distracted me from that thing i was nervous about :)

also likes snoozing off so whenever you can, you squeeze in a pillow when his neck’s in an awkward position and when he wakes up and realizes he’s just like :) gummy smile :)

hobi is a force to be reckoned with

asking “hey r u ok” out of the blue even if you weren’t particularly sure how the other one felt and sometimes one of your heads would just whip and go “you noticed???? :(”

hanging with him whenever he scrolls at his phone and online shops

the only difference is that he buys what he wants

“you’re telling me that we scrolled for like an hour and you’re not buying any of the things you saw????”

and you just pass it off every time because although a pilot’s wage is above average salary, your future and earning isn’t as sECURED and SOLID as his was

that doesn’t stop him peeking at your cart when you aren’t looking and adding it to his and perhaps checking out :) i mean it’s definitely not from him when you see some parcels in your doorstep by the time you get home :) not from him :)

it’s become a constant thing to link your arms together!!!

even if you’re not necessarily walking, it is essential to link arms with you as he argues

one time jimin tried getting in between your linked arms with hobi bc he wanted to join

hobi IMMEDIATELY glares at him and jimin backed off like sheesh ok but u don’t get to do the things i do with y/n either

writing on each other’s forearms is a thing too

sometimes it’s to conversate when you’re not in the mood to talk verbally

sometimes it’s just about talking shit but don’t tell jin he has his coat on backwards he looks laughable

“can u choreograph something for twinkle twinkle little star”

“y/n i-...”

nAMJOON however feels like he should’ve met you earlier like WAY WAY EARLIER

he gets on with you so well and sometimes he just sulks to jimin

“why didn’t you introduce y/n earlier to me god what was life like before y/n”

brain talk is more prevalent than ever because there are thoughts that delve deep into your mind that sometimes only namjoon could get

noah fence but if you were to rant about this to jimin, he would just drone off and grumble and he’d turn to sleeping because he just can’t help it

movie symbolisms????? count that to him and jungkook

after watching parasite for the nth time, you’re sure all three of you had all bases covered but nO it was somehow bottomless

“isn’t it ironic and somehow oxymoronic that...”

he is eternally grateful for you because one night the boys wanted to have a seafood night and u may or may not have had some recipes sent in your airline gc with how your airplane food was made

(surprisingly it didn’t suck)

and you considered him since he hates it and you know what,, he gets something else cooked for him

god namjoon gets why taehyung is smitten with you

also joonie is a bit oblivious to this fact but the other boys notice that you always bring him back a trinket of some sort

you noticed (and jimin might have pointed out one time) that he tended to fiddle with things and do small tasks whenever he was ticked off or stressed out

you keep note that you should gift him one of those fun kiddie entertainment packs when you’re back to regular programming as a pilot

it’s also a constant thing for you to bury your head to his chest

for no reason at all

it’s really comforting to say the least

he could be preparing breakfast and you’re just trudging down the stairs still not fully awake

“hey. i’m making-...”

boop

“oh ok jus hang there if you want but u might get burnt by the pan but it’s ok it’s ur call”

jimin has become even much more of a precious being

gets in your nerves a bit more often than the last time but it’s normal at this point

head rubs that lull you to sleep are the best :((

taehyung sometimes looks to his hands because jimin got you to sleep instantly and he pouts

“how do you do that?? i wanna do that too pls”

jimin’s voice feels like a warm weighted comforter,, that you gotta admit

“your voice is very velvet-y and it’s unfair because i can’t stay mad at you”

“𝓲 𝓴𝓷𝓸𝔀“

you still make an awed face whenever jimin cracks his bones

you’re in the middle of being fond and being disgusted at the sound so it’s still a 50/50 whether you grimace or gasp at him

“can i pls borrow your hoops”

“you could ask a million times and i would still say no”

playing with his rings whenever you’re sad is a habit you would never grow out of

which is why you were attached to him by the hip,,, or rather hands ,,, when taehyung was in the verge of being an ass to you

jungkook is something ELSE

if you aren’t lingering around jimin or taehyung, you would definitely be around him

taehyung is most jealous with the two of you but no he didn’t say that :)

annoying each other is the no. 1 task 

but lately annoying feels like second nature now so it doesn’t seem like tradition anymore

you would be his audience whenever he’s drawing because you’re genuinely enthrilled with him and his work

“how are you so good at this”

you’re almost always trying to copy what he draws

“what were you attempting with this”

“i was attempting your drawing”

“lmao are you sure with that???”

jungkook likes playing with you by pretending that he’s annoyed

but when he sees that u made his art your lockscreen, he was so awed that he was literally about to BAWL

he pretends not to notice when you push your food to his plate because you either aren’t too keen with the dish or you’re just too full

when jimin calls you out for “y/n why are you putting ur food on jungkook’s plate” and jungkook with “and jungkook why are you accepting it”

kook just shrugs and comes to defend you

“nope i didn’t see anything hyung :D”

if you liked shoving your head to namjoon’s chest, you liked leaning on jungkook’s shoulder

seokjin looks most offended 

“not even half of me y/n not even H A L F of me”

this really warms taehyung’s heart

because not only are you close to him but also with his brothers!!

even if he wants to deck jungkook sometimes

and that he may need to work on his jealousy

but none of those things matter because he’s given the assurance that you’re exclusive

that he may be yours and you may be his 

as cheesy as that sounded

taehyung’s working on a plan to properly ask you out once bon voyage ends and not just steal cheek kisses from time to time

or hold your hand and avoid your gaze because he too will surely combust

or hug you from behind tenderly 

much to the teasing and the hoots of the boys

and jimin’s occasional scowls but that’s ok he’s moving on and slowly starting to accept the fact that he can’t be overbearing this much anymore

bon voyage wraps soon enough

and truth be told you didn’t want it to end because you were in such bliss!!

it was a very memorable trip that you now carry close to your heart

and the fact that they still have a commercial to be filmed with you and some billboards to be shot makes you very :D

since the commercial was to be filmed tomorrow and you lived close to the airport, jimin initiated the idea of “hey what about if we just sleep over at y/n’s place??” which was very applauded

taehyung squeals the loudest when the idea was pitched in

“lol no you don’t get to sleep in the same bed as y/n”

namjoon shoots jimin a look that he was being overbearing again

“or you could just let her decide :)”

it’s only been four days since they last saw you but needless to say that it was borderline chaos when they met you at your apartment that was more on the spacious side

“y/n’s uncle kinda owns the building” jimin explains at first because the building did look more lavish than the average complex

“d-do i get to meet y/n’s uncle??” 

taehyung is a bit nervous because he didn’t know that fact obviously and now he’s meeting the family and he is unprepared jesus christ and-

“no he probably won’t like you”

“jimin sTOP making taehyung nervous because he’s gonna start sniffling again”

the lot of them get to your apartment before you because your flight got delayed and therefore jimin just had to whip out his key you gave him as an extra

he does it fast enough before taehyung takes a deep dive to how he doesn’t have an extra key from you or something like that 

jimin does feel like he’s being a bit hard on tae so he lays off of it for now

taehyung has the ultimate heart eyes for you the moment you come home

“i missed you” in the most adorable and heartwarming tone

and there it was again

a cheek kiss and not just a quick peck!!

a tight hug to your waist and a nuzzle against your hairline!!

MUCH WARMTH AND FUZZINESS

once jimin finally got to pry taehyung off of you because he claims that he’s hogging you all to himself, you’re met with very eager hugs and greetings

seokjin and basically everyone else are still in awe seeing you in your uniform so he squeezes in a quick pic in his phone 

you sent him a look and when you peered in, the picture turned out really cool with the nice lighting your apartment had

AND he’s really pushing it that it was good because of the app he downloaded that made pictures have a vintage film cam aesthetic to it

so you yielded and just told him to send the picture to you later 

aha ego boost :D

they insisted on cooking dinner since you did look a bit exhausted from your round of flights even if it was routine at this point (the highlight was when some people recognized you from the pics that went viral and asked to take a pic with you when you were greeting them out!!)

“are you really sure you’re gonna cook dinner, tae? i could always order-...”

“you don’t need to!! i wanna cook for you anyway!!”

that was heartwarming more than usual

jungkook clears his throat

“....,., and us”

“aha yes of course i meant for you and the boys as well :D”

you go to change clothes more than enthusiastically now

because things just seemed to be good with no complications at all

the idea of domesticity with taehyung makes you iMPLODE just by thinking about it

the thought was too soft and too fuzzy that you’ve become energized

maybe reading a couple of emails before taking a shower and cleaning up and getting yourself to look a bit more presentable isn’t a bad thing

it isn’t anything but sheer giddiness when you check your inbox and see an edited version of a run bts ep from a staff member you befriended during bon voyage!!!

you kinda get now what jimin was saying that you had the ability to have people wrapped around your finger

maybe it’s charisma you picked up from wanting to please people just so you could have extra credit???

anyways

it’s a run bts ep you get one of the first dibs on to watch so that’s always a reward

basically the context for it was that it was a hot tub confessions type of thing!! the twist was that they had to speak their heart out (their dislike is very much encouraged) over a certain someone bUT they had to rely on their ~telepathy because names wouldn’t drop

and it was a random selection to who would start the confession first and the others had to go with the flow and basically hope that they’re talking smack about the same person lol

only the name blank would be used and it for the pronoun!!

you were already making assumptions to who it would be about

it could be about jungkook because throughout the whole trip, he would literally gasp out of the blue and take the others in shock like seagulls going WHAT WHAT WHAT IS IT WHAT WHAT

or maybe jimin because he’s a lil shit and would pull chairs and that hobi fell victim and was so annoyed because he fell on his ass so hard 

last prospect was seokjin simply because,, as jungkook emphasized throughout this whole trip,, “ʲᶦⁿ⁻ʰʸᵘⁿᵍ ᶦˢ ˢᵒ ᵒˡᵈ ᵒʰ ᵐʸ ᵍᵒᵈ” just because he complained about his lower back one time

speaking of jin, he gets chosen to open the game!!

and he buffers for a moment that gets another tease from jungkook 

“ᵒʰ ᵐʸ ᵍᵒᵈ ʲᶦⁿ⁻ʰʸᵘⁿᵍ'ˢ ᵐᵉᵐᵒʳʸ ᶦˢⁿ'ᵗ ᵍᵒᵒᵈ ᵃⁿʸᵐᵒʳᵉ ᵍᶦᵛᵉ ʰᶦᵐ ʰᶦˢ ᵐᶦˡᵏ“

“blank bought me an actual film camera!! bit more complicated than taehyung’s!! keeps telling me every five seconds about my settings and i!! i KNOW HOW TO WORK IT THANK U VERY MUCH!!”

although jin is a bit guilty about that because he admits that he has a more-than-sure feeling that most of his pics may or may not be either over-exposed or too dark

this reminds you of that time you bought a film camera for jin on a whim because it was on sale and you were talking about it the night before

lol what a coincidence

hobi takes second call

he is only about a quarter-percent sure to who jin was pertaining to so he trails around for a bit

“blank is like a broken kitchen timer”

he plays it safe with that one 

although there is some sort of edge with his bluntness because everyone might be a little drunk hehe 

“blank looks at things as if it was born yesterday!! literally goes :O”

even goes so far to imitate said expression and it makes everyone gIGGLE

yoongi snorts with that and now he’s a bit more feisty since he’s tipsy

“it joins me in my silence”

wait

“texts me even if i’m in the same room like wtf i can see you”

wait

hold on

“likes hUGGING ME TOO MUCH”

you really didn’t like making things about you because other people doing that makes you tick

but there’s this unsteady feeling in your gut

something that makes you think deep in thought and in doubt

jimin was next to speak so that calms your nerves

he would never, right??

maybe you’re just taking things to heart!! the boys really aren’t talking smack about you, right??

your breath is just held because jimin was surely taking his time in making a show with inhaling so deeply so he could yell a bit more dramatically

“DOES IT NOT HAVE ITS OWN CLOTHES????”

oh

your eyes flicker for a moment to the sweater that’s by your dresser

something of jimin’s that you forgot to return

oh.

“needier and whinier than jungkook”

it was the youngest’s turn to cackle

and at this point you’re only half-listening

you’re a bit too preoccupied with the hurt blooming in your chest

“i!! am!! not!! a!! baby!!”

jungkook’s meltdown makes everyone else laugh because right now he had his fists clenched and his face looking like a baby’s

“blank always wants to be included it’s not funny anymore”

there was just a little bit more hope lingering that this may no be about you at all

but god it was getting too specific 

too specific when it came to namjoon who was a bit more eloquent in speaking and wanting to get his point across

“.... trying to memorize my rap in UGH! .....”

fuck this really is about you

and it’s not just sadness that’s overtaking you

makes you more than deflated than you thought you could ever be

“at this point i sometimes avoid her”

and god there’s this more than familiar laugh that fills your ears through and through

“lol namjoon where do you hide?? i hide in the pantry”

taehyung even?

at this point you can’t even bear watching the video anymore

willing your laptop closed so forcefully that it bOUNCED back open but you can’t even begin to worry that you might have put a crack on the screen

shoving it to your desk with the screen facing anywehere instead of you being the best option

the hurt is painfully fresh and oddly felt so surreal

god were you really that intolerable?

you didn’t know how to cope with what you’ve just heard nor experienced

but the only thing you were sure about is that your situation has just been too good

perhaps this was the complication you were looking for because you weren’t used to things being so good

and you know for sure that this feeling isn’t good at all

and you hated it

at this point you’re just trying to go about your previous plans of showering and cleaning up but the eagerness isn’t there anymore

nor is the eagerness to see the boys

nor is the eagerness to see taehyung

didn’t even notice that you were taking up much time that jimin was at your door knocking, voice gentle and inquiring

“y/n did you fall asleep??”

you’re very much tempted to not go out at all because you lost your appetite for eating too

very much so that you make no move at all and actually think that jimin’s given up on knocking at your locked door

but then your phone rings and he knows for sure that you haven’t gone to sleep because it would’ve been put on silent

“are you hiding???”

you pretty much are and you don’t wanna go out at all

but you basically had no choice to

it was a pressure to wipe at stray tears and say “i’m coming” in an unwavering voice and even more-so pretend that nothing’s wrong at all

or the fact that everyone’s eyes are on you and jimin’s prodding makes everyone else wonder

“are you crying??”

the question doesn’t faze you but it does take you by surprise now that you aren’t comfortable with the situation nor the new attention

taehyung’s getting worried because now he notices the redness in your eyes and the bit of puffiness in your lips

“just sleepy. my eyes tear up when i’m sleepy, right?” you’re using jimin’s knowledge about you against him and he agrees to that almost instantly

can’t help thinking that something was fishy though

you weren’t telling him off when he was bickering to taehyung that he shouldn’t sit next to you for dinner

didn’t react either when tae let off a little victory giggle and grinned when he sat next to you not one bit of acknowledgement when a replay of cake boss was on your tv with jin’s eyes flickering over to you repeatedly but he doesn’t receive an excited glance back

even yoongi found you oddly too quiet and he was tempted to pull out his phone to text you

it’s weirdly off

there’s something missing

namjoon was starting to get worried because you aren’t really engaged in this conversation with a topic he’s direly interested about

“and something done to that degree would just be far too suspicious, right?”

“mhmm yeah”

:(

even jungkook who’s kinda throwing himself at you and you’re just barely responding

he’s wriggling himself to fit by your side and just curl up and when he looks at you expectantly to do something, he just gets a pat on the head

a pat??????

hobi’s being over the top with his reactions right now to try and gauge a reaction from you but to no avail at all

normally he would’ve made you laugh or atleast smile at this point

but there’s nothing

just nothing

taehyung gets you alone on the couch because everyone else was just dispersed at this point and are bumping into each other asking if they knew what happened to you

jimin himself is pressured because he prides himself in being your closest friend aND HE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON WITH YOU

tae is a lil bit more confident that he could coax out to why you were acting so differently

even gets far as to hold your hand and nuzzle his face to the crook of your neck

“everything okay, baby?”

god and he’s only called you baby only for a handful of times

“yeah”

that didn’t hurt taehyung’s ego

not at all

or make him overthink to why you’re not all that willing to open up to him nor even look interested in this conversation he’s carrying alone on his back

no not at all

not even when jimin has the most balls out of the group and is the testing point to see how the waters would go

while the night’s coming to an end and everyone’s slowly starting to settle in

“aha so where are we gonna crash anyway?”

you know what he’s trying to get at 

but seeing to it that what you just watched prior to this and perhaps for even a longer period besides that particular episode you don’t even wanna watch

you might as well not give anyone the sense of satisfaction nor pride; even if the question took you by surprise with how bluntly he addressed it

“uhm well the guest room now has two beds since some friends come over from time to time”

“but-”

“yeah the huge couch could fold over as a bed”

“but-”

“i could also-...”

“but y/n you have a king-sized bed!!”

jimin blurts out and almost whines out, a frown evident on his face as you keep your will not to break

“oh. just wanna sleep alone, jimin, yeah? kinda tired because of work today.”

he almost always gets what he wants and this blooming feeling inside him isn’t because of the embarrassment that you didn’t grant his wishes of just plopping beside you on your bed 

it’s because he’s thinking of why not

taehyung tries his best to just swallow the lump in his throat because he may or may not have daydreamed that he’d get to share beds with you

nothing but cuddling in his mind and the tiny bit of friskiness but that’s beside the point

he doesn’t wanna think about how there are no goodnight hugs

the closest thing to it was jungkook receiving a pat on the shoulder

because it happened that his arms were outsretched awkwardly

no cheek kiss for taehyung either

yeah it’s perhaps just fatigue as hobi tried to reason

they don’t know if they’re convincing each other or just themselves

maybe tomorrow would be better :D

...

aha no 

in fact at this point of morning when everyone knows that you’d be awake and it happens to be your off-day before the shoot tomorrow

and that whenever they’re around, you’d rather linger around them than to stay cooped in your room because you would be too sluggish then go back to sleep again

“blank always wants to be included it’s not funny anymore”

yeah you’d rather keep your pride at this point

jimin knocks again and you know you have no choice if you wanted this to go as discreet and as smooth as possible without raising suspicions that you knew

jin panicked for a moment because he was making french toast that he saw from damn milktpapi to try and catch your attention so when he hEARD your door click he was rapping litanies faster than the rapline ever could

they unconsciously just gravitate towards the couch and are practically hovering around you

you’re awfully quiet and the only input you give is when you’re asked a direct question

the only noise was coming from them reminiscing about their bv trip 

namjoon keeps bringing you up with “yahhh do u remember when y/n-....”

yoongi makes a point to keep laughing and have his arms protruding and therefore nudging you each time

at one point he almost shoves you but he’s barely met with a reaction

goddamn does he need to throw you off a cliff or something just to get a rise out of you

they really think that there must be something wrong 

so right when they wanted to open it up, they literally get interrupted but this time with a doorbell

you practically leap at that opportunity because quite literally were you saved by the bell

you don’t know who’s ringing your bell and why but you’re willing to take it 

jimin knows that you aren’t expecting anyone besides them as he’s made you promise

he might as well square up right now and be huffy about it

you’re bordering on confusion and curiosity as you open the door and even more-so your audience behind you who may or may not be in the same state

“theo??”

yoongi’s ears immediately perk up at that while his eyes go the widest

he’s toppling over as he scrambles for a vantage point that would get to see theo but without neither you nor theo seeing him

oh my god is this really your prfoessional basketball player for an ex-boyfriend

the boys are panicked to how yoongi’s acting and they even help him adjust his position even if they don’t know what it’s for

“wHAT YOONGI WHAT WHAT WHAT”

“BE QUIET”

he’s racking his brain for the description you gave and the picture you showed him

tall? intimidatingly. shoulders? perhaps even broader than seokjin’s. muscles? even more defined than jungkook when he lived in the gym. fluffy and silky-looking hair? enviously so :((

oh god it is theo

is he supposed to fanboy now

wait 

what was your ex doing here anyway

“i’m just gonna be out for a second, yeah?”

you say aimlessly and yoongi catches your gaze and he pretends to eat french toast while he’s stretched out on the floor to not break his cover

no one even has a chance to question nor respond because you’re already shutting the door

“WHO WAS THAT”

“WHY IS HE HERE”

“i sWEAR i saw him on tv once”

“taehyung are you ok”

yoongi’s bombarded and even if he’s shocked at the the turn of events because one second ur eating french toast with them and the next you’re out the door; he does have a bit more of an idea

“oh that was theo”

...

“are we supposed to automatically know who tHEO is???”

“you gonna add more context to that or????”

“even jimin doesn’t know!!!”

“theo’s a basketball player”

there are a couple of awed reactions

even namjoon’s explosive “aHHHHH so that’s where he’s from”

but there’s this question that’s begging to be asked

jimin taking front line as he asks with so much spite

“why is theo here then??”

this baffles yoongi too

most times he just doesn’t sugarcoat things and his mouth speaks the truth before he could even think of something else

“aish i don’t know i just know that she’s y/n’s ex so stop asking me if-...”

jimin’s in the corner with his mouth dropped, tongue poking at his cheek

“oh uhm i didn’t know that”

taehyung is sat on the floor with his attention not on the french toast anymore

eyes distant and not blinking as he’s nodding

“i see”

both jimin and taehyung clearly need time to process this bit of information

the conversation ends at that and everyone else staggers around

jimin’s in thought because why didn’t he know that??

shouldn’t he know that?

and what’s it with yoongi knowing instead of him?

taehyung, on the other hand, is conflicted with what he should feel

he’s jealous that’s for sure

the both of you covered masses of topics during the outing

but it never came to the topic of past flames

were you meaning not to tell him? or theo wasn’t talked about because the topic never came????

is this insecurity that he’s feeling

jungkook has to hold taehyung’s head still because he’s still nodding while deep in thought

you really weren’t expecting theo to show up at your doorstep

it’s in good intentions and you remained as friends but he was just too unexpected

“didn’t you know?? i’m gonna be one of those extras tomorrow for your airline commercial and it’s just a lil cameo but still!!! i don’t know i just wanted to visit you since i was in the area too :D”

and that’s what ended up with you coming with him to the little cafe at your complex with the promise that it was just gonna be quick and you’ll show him out

and perhaps that you don’t wanna be in the same room as them either

avoiding is good

yeah it would be good

:)

jimin doesn’t know what he’s trying to prove either but there’s this tug on his chest that basically yelled at him that he was a shitty friend

hasn’t been an hour ever since you left but he’s kinda sitting there fazed, whatever the other was saying coming in his ear and going out the other

“i lost my charger :(((”

jimin’s mindlessly answering to a pouty namjoon

“y/n has the same laptop. you could just get the charger by her desk”

he says naturally as if it’s clockwork and only waves him off when namjoon asks if it would be okay with you

he smiles at that and practically bounces to your unlocked room

quickly finds your desk and looks for a familiar charger

oh uhm it’s still connected to your laptop

jimin already said it was no worries so namjoon sleekly takes it out of the port with little hesitation

why did your laptop turn on

wait

is that his face??

is that

is that them in a hot tub

jimin’s wondering why namjoon is taking so long

he himself hasn’t been in your room for a long time and the thought makes him spring up

“hyung??”

fuck

oh god

it feels like freezing cold water was just splashed onto their spines without warning

jimin immediately pales

it’s taehyung who piles in last to your bedroom with all the commotion he could hear

he wants to absolutely deck himself 

everyone’s just speechless when they clicked play on the video even when they had this underlying feel to what it was

there’s a collective intake of sharp inhales because they couldn’t even finish the episode in which they basically talk shit about you for a solid three minutes

jimin has his face on his hands and he’s visibly stressed as everyone else is

couldn’t even tell on which blow was the hardest because they were all so harsh in their own ways

basically hit where it hurts most 

they were drunk beyond their comprehension and weren’t necessarily thinking

the episode was filmed pretty much in the first day of bv 

and whatever circumstance that night was in, it was still no excuse

absolutely no excuse to how they acted

maybe they took joking and overexaggerating too far

but whatever route they took, be it honest or not, no doubt that they were sure it hurt you

god a mental breakdown is already creeping at the back for all seven of them

tAEHYUNG’S SOBBING

jimin’s shaking

jungkook’s rubbing his eyes

jin and namjoon are repeating themselves

hobi’s dead silent

yoongi’s hands are practically trembling

it’s when you go home that you’ve momentarily forgotten that everything was going downwards because you spent the last hour or two being distracted by theo in just your pajamas

but it’s when you know that they know

and some can’t even look you in the eye

jimin’s the first to shoot up from his seat and god he looks somehow wrecked

“y/n i-...”

“m’sorry for being introlerable and all of those things, yeah? won’t happen again.”

everyone tenses at that

you shouldn’t even be apologetic!!

in fact they’re the ones who fucked up and you’re the one who’s acting as if you did

this makes them even more guilty

they all pipe in and try to point that out but you just easily drown them out with a tilt of your head

taehyung who’s standing by your doorframe just buffers as if to reach out for you but he retracts it quickly

they’ve really done it this time huh

it’s all just in characteristically empty spirits

the shooting next day was painful

having to drive together and be squished in between yoongi and jungkook whose mouths were so dry and eyes glossy

“i didn’t mean it”

jungkook first says under his breath and it’s quite a hitch in his throat when he adds on to it

“we weren’t thinking at all”

it’s a quiet show as jungkook and yoongi try to apologize to you and you’re in the middle trying to just sit through it all

it’s a quick nod as you have for a response before you hurriedly go down the van in perfect timing

you did listen and the apologies were sincere and heartfelt

just not too keen on forgiving something of that gravity in an instant

even with their promise that they could work something out to have that bit cut out or even scrap the whole episode if necessary

you just couldn’t wait to get the day over

you’re rigid with them and them trying to get to talk to you in between takes

the skits required more of them than you anyway so you just sat that one out

all while they try to get genuine with the feelings and lines indicated in their script

taehyung was the most distracted

even if people expected more of him given his acting credentials

and when it’s your turn to be filmed at, he can’t help staring

you looked blank

there’s this certain hyunbin (and also to your surprise) that’s gonna act as your co-pilot that got to make you smile a time or two after making a fool out of himself

if only taehyung knew that theo’s gonna be here as an extra

he would flip and THEN bawl

and as if things wouldn’t get even more unfavorable for you, they decide to cram in the photoshoot for the billboard at this very day too

multiple shoots of you being in the middle of them with a commercial-like smile

you having a solo one

them having one too

the boys wearing your airline’s flight attendant uniforms

trying to have a candid shot but all of you should be laughing and smiling as per the director

that was painful

that was really painful for the staff to watch

most painful for the eight of you

they even had to count to three so you could laugh together even if that takes away the essence of a candid shot

jimin wants so badly to hold you and talk to you

taehyung wants to get on his knees desperately if it means earning your forgiveness

the shoot raps and you’re zooming out the set

tae breaks down yet again because they’re gonna be held up by your ceo for awhile

:(

things feel empty and slow

everyone got around to texting you their apologies because as much as they’re desperate to apologize, they’ve done enough damage and respecting your space is the least they could do

that doesn’t stop jimin dropping in from time to time to leave something by your door

nor taehyung who doesn’t give up with all his texting and calling and sometimes waiting on your door

jimin and him coincidentially went at the same time and they just teared up and sulked together

you weren’t even home at that time

of course you’ve read their messages

trying to talk it out too as you’ve refused to succumb into your passive-aggressiveness

admittedly

you don’t wanna lose what you have either

:(

it’s only been two weeks so far

progress as you reply to texts here and there

slowly warming up again!!

namjoon earning back his partner for talking about movie symbolisms and perhaps everything wrong in this barren earth

seokjin getting to send you incorrect quotes from cake boss again left and right

hobi gaining his online shopping partner back 

yoongi making you promise that you’d hug him when he gets to see you again

jungkook vowing to teach you how to draw and makes sure to send daily content so he could make you switch wallpapers

jimin

well jimin

jimin’s going over the top as he has a lot to mend

but forgiveness was clear in the path and when you finally agreed to meet up with him after your shift

(he’s made the effort to wait for you in your lounge hours before as he got to pull some strings)

and then when you have a drink over it and talk about what happened properly, it just ends in a massive hug and some tears shed :((

“i missed u so much”

“i know”

“i could really be a fucking asshole sometimes”

“you are”

“you are none of those things and i don’t ever wanna stop having you as my friend”

“aha yes”

“you love me too much and i love you too much and this is forever now ok pls don’t get mad at me ever again”

basically everything was slowly returning back to normal

taehyung hasn’t texted you for a couple of days

even if you barely responded and miss him as much

it’s something you still have to come to terms with because his blows hit the hardest

you’re losing sleep just by thinking about him :(

you try to get on with your days with the knowledge that you get on with the six of them

things becoming more hectic for you because sometimes you forget that you’re famous now

but sometimes it was just lackluster if you were to admit

you basically sprint at the chance to pick up a normal shift again because you’ve missed flying

you liked being pampered for shoots but being tired from flying is the ache you’ve been craving for :((

it’s when you’re briefed that the plane you’d be flying isn’t your usual aircraft yet you still have the clearance for it

it’s when you just had the kick to be extra punctual and jump at the chance to greet passengers boarding

it’s these little extras in your day that you were so eager for things

that things just seem to be aligning

:)

taehyung’s by the front-most seat

hyunbin by his side as he gets up and goes to the cockpit to do nothing but take your place

it’s oddly warm just by looking at taehyung

no apologies have been said yet and it’s when that hyunbin practically says over the mic that “y/n take a seat and put your seatbelt on jesus christ” you do beside tae

the atmosphere’s just a loving type of warm

you really can’t explain it

it’s the same type of slow burn the both of you felt in the outing

the same anticipation you had for each other even if the other was doing the bare minimum

“hi”

taehyung croaks out after an eternity, a grin he tries to earnestly keep as it breaks out

“let’s talk.”

he’s nervous as he sees you relax to your seat, knowing in routine that the plane was to take off 

taehyung ever-so slightly shifts in his seat, shoulders touching with yours and hand in an armrest as he flexes them so slightly -- only supposed to be an attempt at a loving tease but it’s when you shift towards him and have your hand skim his for the slightest fraction

:)

“let’s talk.”

[ncityislove]

The Jury is Out Ch. 3

➳Pairing: Renjun x Reader x Jeno (ft a few other Dreamies)

➳Genre: Angsty fluff but mostly angst lol basically enemies to lovers

➳Word Count:4.6k

Hiiii guys! It’s been over a year since I started this series and this has taught me so many things. Mainly, how much I can not be trusted to start and finish a series lol. The last two chapters will be out soon. I really mean it this time.

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There's an awful pounding in your head from the looming headache you didn't see going away anytime soon. Your over-bearing thoughts being added into the mix is plain unbearable as you wait for your first class to start and your sour mood only worsens when you recall the unfolding of yesterday's events. The strong sense of shame was overwhelming like a dark cloud hanging over your head. How did you get here? Your biggest mistake was letting your guard down to the likes of Renjun. That's where it all went wrong. You try telling yourself you don't need him as a friend. You have Jeno. But you can't silence the desire in your heart to have something more than a partnership. You'd gotten a taste of what's it like to be under the warm rays of his kindness after being on the receiving end of the endless blizzard of the cold reign he had over you and the entire school. That wasn't something you could just forget.

When Renjun arrives, he takes his place right next to you, unpacking his items as if it were the most normal thing in the world. You don't know why he isn't sitting in his usual seat when you didn't have a lab today. You frown but silently remove your bag from the chair next you, nonetheless.

He sits down eagerly, glancing at you a moment longer than socially acceptable. "I like your hair."

Your hands immediately grip the strands.  After the party, you decided to forgoes the ponytail and headband combo that you'd been sporting for so long. "Oh, um, thanks."

Was that a compliment just now?

"Where were you yesterday, by the way?"

"I was sick, so I missed first period," he states, not even missing a beat.

Unbelievable. He's lying straight to your face. You frown distastefully.

"That's not what Chenle had to say."

"Hm? Chenle? He's always pulling pranks—I wouldn't buy anything that comes out of his mouth," he laughs.

You glare at him for a moment. "You didn't get my texts messages?"

He smiles sheepishly. "Oh...sorry about that. I was...um...busy?"

You turn the other way to discretely roll  your eyes. "Are you okay at least?"

"Yeah, never better!"

You shake your head, not wanting to seem like you actually cared despite the fact that deep down you knew you did. It's crazy that all it took was one little afternoon alone together and suddenly Renjun matters to you. All those years of being at each other's throats out the window. Just like that. It was different now. You were more mindful of each other's feelings and it's even gotten to the point where you're receiving compliments. It was a change that you still hadn't adjusted to but maybe it wasn't as lousy as you made it seem. The horrible excuses and lies weren't something you were fond of but it's not like you were friends so you kept that to yourself. You just wished he'd tell you the truth or even hearing that he didn't want to talk about it would've been fine. You didn't see why he had to lie...

You had to remind yourself that you shouldn't be so concerned with Renjun. It was weirding you out that you were thinking about him so much lately. As much as you hated to admit it, you might've maybe felt something for him in that teeny split second after you made up on the field. You never really noticed how funny he was bc you were always the butt of the joke but it turns out he was pretty hilarious. And his voice was so sweet and calming you could probably listen to it forever. But whatever it was—that moment your heart skipped a beat— was gone. It was crazy to even think—there was no way you'd ever say that out loud. Clearly, Renjun would never reciprocate.

If only Haven could see you now.

Renjun turns his body toward you, giving you his full attention. "Are we meeting at the track after school?"

"I have volleyball practice but we can meet after, if you want."

"Yeah, cool," he says, looking pleased.

"Are you sure you're okay though?"

The question had been on your mind since yesterday. Maybe something happened with his dad and he didn't want to say anything. According to Jeno, he didn't talk about that stuff much but you still wanted to make sure he was okay.

"Huh?" he looks at you strange. "Yeah, I'm good."

"Are you sure? I mean, you can tell me if you're not." You regret the words as soon as they leave your mouth.

He snickers, his face glowing with a big smile. "Are you worried about me?"

You scowl to hide your panic. What was happening  to you? "As if," you scoff.

"Aww, you care about me! Who knew the coldest person in the world had a heart?" he pinches your cheek.

You violently slap his hand away and he jerks back.

"Don't!" you point a finger in his face. "touch me. Never again. Got it?"

"Alright," Renjun chuckles lightly. "My bad. Whatever you say."

When class starts, the teacher pulls up her usual PowerPoint and you begin messily jotting down the first slide. She seems to be in a rush as she breezes over every slide, making it difficult to write down everything in time.

Renjun nudges your arm. You look to see him offering you a piece of gum. You reject it, mouthing a  'no thanks' with a polite smile and scramble to write down the rest of the slide. He purses his lips, taking a piece for himself, leisurely writing his notes.

A few minutes later, he nudges your arm again. "You got any led?"

Your nostrils flare as you let out a sigh, pulling out your pencil pouch for him to find the kind of led he needs. You pick your pencil back up to continue your notes.

"Thanks," he whispers. "Hey, did you get that last slide?"

"Oh my god, no, Renjun!" you whisper-shout at him. "How could I have gotten the last slide when you keep distracting me??"

He starts to giggle and it you get even more heated that he found pleasure in this. You're just to about to curse him out in every language known to man when Mrs. Brookes stops her lesson.

"What's going on back there?" she peers down her bi-focals to stare you down. "__, would you like to tell me what the main parts of the brain are?"

"Umm," you hesitate, your eyes scanning over the board. It must I've been on the last slide--which you didn't get the chance to copy thanks to Renjun.

Mrs. Brooks looks at you impatiently and the class turns to look at you as well when you take too long to answer.

"Cerebellum, frontal lobe, parietal lobe, cerebrum, and the thalamus," Renjun answers, ultimately saving your ass.

"Very good! Thank you, Renjun. Now, as I was saying..." Mrs. Brookes turns back to the whiteboard and continues rambling on about the brain.

"I thought you didn't get the last slide?" you whisper.

"Just because I didn't write it down doesn't mean I wasn't paying attention."

You stare at the side of his face in disbelief and you can tell by the way his cheeks were lifted he was smiling.

Renjun sits with you again in third period. You scoot your stuff over, once again saying nothing. This was getting a little too odd. If you weren't friends why did he keep sitting next to you? You weren't friends, were you? You decide not to ask. Sadie seemed like the right person to confide this type of stuff into.     Your desks were too close together which made Renjun's knee touch yours. You wouldn't have noticed any other time but this time in particular it was hard to not to.

"You should sit with me at lunch from now on."

Definitely getting mixed signals here.

"Why?"

"We're partners. It only makes sense, you know?"

"But we've been partners for years," you interject.

He opens his mouth then closes it. "Well, yeah that's true...but you still should. I won't force you to but I'll be really upset if you don't."

"Upset?" you repeat with a tilt of your head. In what universe would he get upset over anything you did that didn't have to do with you scoring higher than him on an assignment? You didn't understand why he was acting so weird today.

"Yeah and if I get upset, I won't be able to focus on the booth." his tone is sad and it tugs at your heart for some reason.

"Well...if that's the case, I'll do it. For the sake of the booth."

He smiles triumphantly. "Right. For the booth."

The kid who usually sits next to you walks over and stands there awkwardly before he finds an empty seat somewhere else. You try not to laugh at how uncomfortable Renjun looks.     Class goes by smoothly this time, Renjun only bugging you every once in a while to compare answers on your worksheet. When the bell rings, you and Renjun walk to lunch together. He's talking to you about the Pythagorean theorem but you keep getting distracted by the odd looks people keep giving you in the hall.     You weren't used to getting this much attention. You're existence was pretty much irrelevant unless something happened with your rivalry and it was usually only gossip worthy if he had done something incredibly embarrassing to you. Renjun, being the top of the class and being friends with almost all the members in the the school sports teams on the other hand, was very popular. You couldn't begin to imagine the confusion you two were causing just by walking to into the cafeteria together. He was always the center of attention and much like Sadie, he was born likeable. It was easy for him to make friends and juggle the delicate balance of having a social life and performing well academically. You were a nobody compared to him and up until now you were fine with that. It was easier to focus on your studies without the distractions from others and what drama friendships with others would bring but you had to admit having someone to walk to lunch with was strangely nice.     Jisung is the first person to see you coming, a look of recognition crossing his face. Chenle was next; he smiles sending you a friendly wave. You say hello, sitting your tray down next to Jeno and Renjun sits on the other side of you.

"Hey, beautiful, what're you doing here?" Jeno asks.

You flush at the pet name. "I think as Renjun's partner, we should take advantage of the free time we have to work together."

"Oh god, you two are so much alike," Haechan groans.

"I think it's cute," Chenle beams.

Jaemin fake gags and everyone bursts into laughter except for you who didn't find it all that funny.

The laughter dies down.

"Will you be spending all of your free time with Renjun?" Jeno asks.

"Of course not," you wrinkle your nose at the silly question.

"In that case, would you like to go out on a date? How's tonight?"

You drop your carton of milk on the table that thankfully you hadn't opened it yet. You must've misheard him. You know the words he said to you and yet, you couldn't believe they were meant for you. Your stammer for words. Any words. But they don't come and the whole table is staring at you in anticipation.

"I...can't. I have practice after school and then I have to work on the booth. I'm sorry."

The boys "ooh" in unison like a bunch of fifth graders.

"It's not like that!" you scramble to fix your words. "We can go another day?"

Jeno's eyes disappear as he gives you the most heartwarming smile. You can't help but smile back at him.

Chenle clears his throat. "What do you think about that, Renjun?"

Renjun's picking at the edge of his foam tray when he shrugs. "I couldn't care less."

Chenle gives him a glare as if he's trying to convey some message to him but Renjun doesn't meet his eyes so he elbows the crap out of him.

"Argh!" he rubs his arm. "Fine. I admit I don't approve."

The table gets quiet. You and Jeno share the same expression of surprise.

Jeno juts out his chin. "Why not? And don't say she's too good for me."

"Renjun clenches his fists. "It'll distract __ from school and I don't think that's what she wants."

Jeno snorts. "It's just one date. I think she'll be fine. And when we do become a couple—which we will, I'll make sure of that—I won't distract from her school work."

"Yeah, but I don't think—"

"Plus, you used to have a girlfriend—what's the difference?"

The atmosphere tenses at the mention of Haven and Jeno looks sorrowful as the boys send him ferocious looks.

"Shit...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to--"

"When does practice end?" Renjun changes the subject.

You're still confused as to what's going on. "Who? Me?"

"Yes, you, dummy," he grins.

You ignore the fact that he just called you a dummy. "It ends at four but I can leave early."

"Mind if I come and watch?" Jeno asks.

"Sure!" you get excited at the thought of Jeno watching you play.

"No fair! I wanna come too!" Jisung exclaims.

Jaemin reaches out to pat him on the shoulder. "Absolutely not. You're not going anywhere near those girls, you pervert."

You crack up at the two, unaware of the concerned look Chenle's giving Renjun as he silently scribbles dark circles in his notebook.

-

You arrive to the school gym, hauling the equipment the coach had you fetch. The girls are all huddled in a circle, gossiping most likely. You set up the net and clear the court of the smelly matts that were left behind from a previous class. You could ask for help but you were sure no one wanted to.

You break up their little party after you get another text of instructions from the coach.

"Ladies, coach says she's not coming until the end of practice so we're starting without her. Let's start stretching, okay?"

The girls spread out and begin to warm up and you join them. Everyone's following instructions except for Haven, who's still standing in the same spot.

"Haven," you say in a warning tone.

"Why can't we just hang out until coach gets here? She doesn't have to know."

Her smile is innocent but you know there's nothing innocent about the girl.

Everyone agrees, the room filling with murmurs.

You already sense anger rising in your body. It seems like every time Haven opened her mouth, it was always to go against you. Maybe her and Renjun were the perfect couple after all.

"Guys, c'mon. If we slack off, we'll throw the next game and lose our winning streak."

"No way, skipping one day of practice won't cost us some measly game. You're being a little dramatic, don't 'ya think?"

"Some measly game?" you repeat.

"You don't even care about winning. Haven, you don't care about this team at all—why should any of us listen to you? I am captain of this team, in case you've forgotten."

"Oh god here we go again," she sighs. "That's just a title. That doesn't make you the boss of me."

"Oh, yes it does. I can get your ass kicked off the team with one word. Coach trusts me, all I have to do is say it. Should I have a chat with her when gets here?"

Haven gets as red as a tomato, her lips poking out in an ugly pout. You almost laugh at how childish she is. It was a mystery how people adore her so much when she's got such an ugly attitude.

"Since you all agree with Haven, let's do ten laps. C'mon."

Everyone gives Haven dirty looks as they get up and start their laps.

"Let's go girls, I'd like to get this over with so we can start practice." you clap your hands to speed them up. "And Haven? You get an extra ten laps."

Haven flips you off before she runs off but you don't really care. At least, she was listening to you for once. You hear a door slam upstairs and Jeno struts in, taking a seat at the back of the bleachers. He's smiling as he waves to you, giving you a thumbs up. You can't help but match his smile as you wave back.

When everyone's finished their laps and done their stretches, you split them into two teams. You're opposing Haven's team and boy, do they suck. They're losing embarrassingly bad and you're not even the one who's hitting the ball. One of your best players, Sana, was dragging the other team through the mud. Mina and Momo always made sure the ball got passed to her and when she swung her fists, the ball connected with the ground every time. Haven hated lots of things but you knew most of all, she hated to lose. This was the only reason you haven't kicked her off yet. She wasn't the best player—not even close—but she did like to win. You don't know what made her join the team in the first place but she did and she always tried to win when it really came down to it.

You switch positions on both sides, you serving the ball this time. You throw the ball up high, spreading your fingers apart as you raise your hand and slam your palm against it so hard, there's a loud thud that echoes through the gym. The other team throws themselves to save the ball but their efforts are in vain. The ball is too fast for them. Applause comes from the top right corner of the room and everyone turns to look at Jeno. You pretend you don't notice him, calling the ball back but your flushed face exposes you anyway.

Jeno whoops and cheers every time you scored a point, and let's be real, with the skills you have, that means it happens a lot. You never had someone who wasn't your parents or your coach cheer you on like this and it was something you found you really enjoy. You could get used to this. For a moment you let yourself imagine him attending your future games. Your stomach fills with butterflies and you could almost hear him calling your name when you dive to save the ball.

"Why's Jeno here?" Haven whispers to to one of her friends. "Since when was __ close to Jeno?"

You smirk, waving Jeno over after letting everyone take a short break. The two of you laugh and talk for a bit, ignoring the cold stare Haven's giving you in the distance. She was in a bitchy mood today and you weren't going to let that ruin your time with Jeno. Her witchy attitude has peaked since the first time Renjun invited you to his table. Maybe she was jealous. She probably was still hurting from the break up you assumed but that had nothing to do with you.

-

Jeno walks you to the track field where you find Renjun, who's already gotten a head start. His jacket is thrown over his bookbag and you take notice for the first time how toned his arms are with his sleeves rolled up. He looks up when hears your footsteps, the smile on his face slowly fading when he notices Jeno next to you.

"Oh great. What are you doing here?"

You laugh at his displeased expression. "He's just leaving, calm down."

"Actually," he interjects. "since I'm here, why don't I stay and help out?" Jeno proposes.

"Oh!" you let out an excited squeal you didn't know you were capable of. "That's great idea! Yes!"

"Absolutely not!" Renjun rolls his eyes. "Go home, Jeno. You'll just get in the way."

Jeno juts his bottom lip out and you have to keep yourself from swooning at how adorable he looks.

"Renjunie!" he whines. "I promise not to get in the way. Let me help?"

You give him pleading eyes behind Jeno's back. Renjun looks at you and grunts, muttering something inaudible as he starting hammering away at a slab of wood a little too hard.

"Yes!" Jeno takes off his jacket and gets to work.

"This is a one-time thing," Renjun declares, his back turned to the both of you.

"Right, right, got it," Jeno quickly agrees. "Let me help you with that," he runs over to carry the bucket of paint you were holding.

You watch him lug the heavy object to the table. "Oh, thanks, but I had it."

Renjun rolls his eyes again.

You find him repeatedly trying to get Jeno to go home as you work. Each and every time Jeno would laugh it off, calling him grumpy. You could tell his mood was off but you didn't want to bother him by asking why. He never told you those kinds of things anyway so why go through the trouble of asking? He never laughs when Jeno makes one of his famous jokes and he doesn't look at you when you speak to him. You wish he wouldn't be such a fun killer but he was almost always like this—even at parties, you've come to find out.

When you start to lose daylight, you decide to call it quits for the day.

"I think we can wrap up for now," you beam. "We're nearly finished thanks to Jeno."

Renjun's bag is already slung over his shoulder by the time you finish your sentence. "See ya."

"Yeah...I'll see you," you trail off as he sprints down the field.

"What's his problem?" Jeno asks aloud.

You shrug just as your phone starts to jingle that annoying ringtone you set it to over a year ago. You dig it out of your back pocket and read the caller ID. It's Sadie.

"Hello?'

"Hey! Listen, I'm so, so, sorry, I totally spaced about picking you up after school. I'm out with Jodie right now."

You can't help the displeased noise that comes from you at the sound of Jodie's name. "That's cool, I guess. I can just walk like I usually do."

"Are you sure? We can come and get you in about twenty minutes."

"We?  Yeah, no thanks. I promise, I'll be fine."

"I promised mom and dad I'd pick you--hold on. Jodie, I'm on the phone...what?"

There's whispering then a short silence on the other line and you give Jeno an awkward smile.

"Um, okay, be safe walking. Sorry again! Bye!"

Click.

"So, you're walking home today."

"Yep. My sister conveniently forgot about my existence, so yeah, I'm walking."

Jeno's eyes light up. "Do you live close by? I can walk you home."

Your chest fills with warmth at the gesture. Lee Jeno. You had Lee Jeno offering to take you home. Renjun's bad attitude had left a nasty taste in your mouth but hanging out with Jeno sweetened your day just like that.

Renjun had a way of hurting you in ways no one else could. You didn't know why what he thought of you was so important to you, or why everything he had to say held such a huge weight. He wasn't exactly someone you were very fond of so who cares what he had to say? But Jeno. Jeno always had kind and encouraging words. He was the safe band-aid you needed after being cut by Renjun's blunt words. His razor sharp tongue and eyes for daggers always stung but Jeno protected you. He defended you.

So you say yes to his offer and you make the bold move of linking your elbows which Jeno reacts with a subtle pink tint in his cheeks. Your pace is slow to lengthen the journey, allowing you a chance to get to know each other a bit more.

As time progresses, you realize you had liked Jeno more than you initially thought you did. School had always kept you from exploring your feelings for him. Now, it was clear as ever how you felt about him. You'd turn into a bashful mess at every single flirty comment he'd make, which would only fuel him to flirt harder. He made good company and you wished you hadn't have waited so long to speak to Jeno. You couldn't remember the last time you were this engaged in a conversation with someone--disregarding the one time with Renjun because he's a jerk.

If this is what it's like to have a friend, you had been missing out all these years. He made you feel warm inside like those cheesy rom-coms Sadie loved so much.

His arm was tucked snugly into yours, your steps matching in pace as you neared the street you lived on. You could smell the pleasant fragrance Jeno wore from the close proximity and it brought you back to the night you were drunkenly dancing together. You still couldn't believe you drank alcohol but then again, who lives by a code of conduct in high school? Who was going to punish you for acting your age for once? On second thought your parents would probably ground you for life but that's not the point. The point is you're starting to learn what fun is. If you can't be the best then what's stopping you from enjoying life while you're still young? Looking at Jeno in the stark red haze the sky is dawning on him made you want to do just that. He made you want to live a normal life.

You playfully bump each other, cracking jokes until you reach the driveway of your residence with hesitance. You weren't ready to depart just yet.

"Well," you remove your arm from his. "This is me."

"Aww," he sigh a little. "Well it was nice walking with you."

"Yeah, you too. I'd invite you inside but no one's home and my parents would crucify me if I let you in."

You hadn't realized it but in the few seconds you had looked away, Jeno had gotten closer. Really close. You feel a rapid heat spread all over and you struggle to keep a normal expression.

Jeno smiles before grabbing your elbow to yank you even nearer, his eyes studying yours as he speaks his next words to you carefully.

"Do you wanna kiss me?"

Your mouth goes dry and all you could do is nod, numbly.

He cracks another smile and you were instantly mesmerized by the way his lips curls over his teeth and the thought of how his lips would feel on yours. Your heart stills for a moment. You shut your eyes with baited breath as his lips gets closer to yours.

Slowly, very slowly he kisses you. It was an odd but welcoming feeling, kissing a boy. But you liked it. And you liked Jeno.

Jeno removes himself from you after a few amazing seconds. You're still incredibly close to him and you can tell he's tempted to kiss you again but he holds himself back.

"Text me?"

You nod, maybe a little too eagerly but you didn't care. The hot temperature of his lips left a lingering impression on you and you had a feeling you won't ever be able to rid yourself of the memory.

He holds up a hand before he jogs off down the pale path of the sidewalk, unintentionally leaving you with a mass of confused and excited thought and a small voice in the back of your brain that wouldn't shut up about Renjun and his recent odd behavior.

[sixteenyearoldrants]

entry number one - to my old friend group, i am not stupid.

disclaimer: this is basically a diary. when i was 8 i took a dork diaries quiz and it told me to write a blog as a form of venting, which is exactly what i’m doing right now. you should definitely not read this fellow tumblr users it’s boring and a waste of your time i’m basically just talking to myself. if you read this and think you know me irl, no you don’t. i’m using initials to replace names btw.

introduction to my rant

my school is tiny. it only has like 250 people in the ENTIRE school, and my year (the biggest year) has 53 people. over half of them are guys, so that leaves my options for school friends pretty limited. if you’re wondering why i don’t include guys as possible friend group joiners, there is absolutely no reason why, except the fact that there’s an unspoken rule that there are no mixed gender friend groups. at all. they just don’t exist in my year. they exist in the other schools in my town, the ones with over 900 people, but definitely not in mine. as of right now, there are seven friend groups in my year. all groups except group one are all girls

group one is all of the guys. they all have their own little micro groups, but usually all of them hang out in one huge group together. group two and three are kinda exclusive? like they’ve stayed the exact same people since day one, and they’re all actually really nice but i’ve never talked to any of them about anything that isn’t homework answers, so that’s a no. group four is the closest thing we have to popular people, except there’s not enough people in the school for us to have actual intimidating popular people and they’re too nice to be mean-popular. before one of these girls joined, she was a kpop stan and my best friend. she’s still nice but i miss how close we were before we drifted.group five consists of four girls (two of whom are sisters whos parents are first cousins!!!!) and are undeniably the ‘weird kids’. i’m gonna make a separate post later on why they’re considered this but it’s most definitely accurate name for them.

group six is my old friend group that i recently left because they were extreme bitches and sosososo toxic. they genuinely act like they’re better than everyone and judging from the shitty two years i spent with them, they actually think they are. the only person i actually like is LB, she’s the sweetest person ever, i love her to bits. she left the group with me for reasons i will later reveal.

and finally, group seven. this is the biggest group, with seven or eight people. i’ve always been good enough friends with the people in it, so when my old friend group got to be too much, they let me and LB hang out with them, and i’m so happy i was able to fall back on them. i’m a lot happier in this group.

the actual rant  - why my old group was so toxic

okay, so i come across as a very ditzy person. i laugh at the stupidest things. i zone out when people talk sometimes. i like to run everywhere, sometimes i skip. i always have to ask what’s going on because i wasn’t listening. i genuinely cannot stay serious. it’s just how i am. like i guess i am kind of a ditz? but i’m not stupid at all. not at alllll. as a matter of fact, i’ve always been really smart (except in algebra because wtf how am i meant to equalize algebraic fractions using coordinates???) but anyways i’m very clever. i can tell in two seconds flat if someone’s trying to bullshit me, i can win any argument purely through logic, i can persuade people by figuring out exactly what i know they want to hear without giving them false hope. right now, i’m doing the highest possible level in every class through my second language, in a school where everyone else grew up surrounded by it and i could barely say a sentence when i joined, and have never ever made a grade lower than a C+. 

i am not stupid.

but for some reason, because i’m a bit ditzy, this friend group took that as an excuse to treat me like i am stupid, and i hated it. it wasn’t so bad for the first year. it was normal. i may have been the most common butt of their jokes, but it was fine. there was no actual bad intent behind it, they were just normal inside jokes and stuff. but then, in second year, it actually started to sting.

i would say anything and automatically recieve a dirty look, for example, once i told them about my brother’s sleepwalking, because tbh if your brother unlocks the door and walks out of your house in the middle of the night to stand outside the neighbors door in his pyjamas and socks because he’s “borrowing the hoover”, ALL while asleep (he sleeps with his eyes open too which makes it even creepier bc he doesn’t blink he just stares with weird ass zombie eyes), you’re probably gonna think, ‘hey! that’s a funny story! i should tell my friends about that!’, right?

so i went into school that morning and told them about it really excitedly, and all i got back was one “... okay.”, and all of them giving me a weird look and giving each other knowing looks and then starting up a conversation about the posters on the wall in the room we were in, like i had never said anything at all. (LB wasn’t there. it was just the three bitches)

i know i’m just being dramatic. i know i’m too sensitive, but i had been so excited to tell them about that, and then they couldn’t be bothered to respond with anything other than a look. and it fucking hurt so much and i don’t know why but that memory just always stuck with me. after that i just kinda faded into the background for the rest of the conversation and didn’t say much.

but then i realized that a pattern was emerging. if i tried to start a conversation, i would get the “... okay?” and the looks would be given and exchanged. if i asked a question, i.e “wait, so *name* did/said what?”, they would exchange looks, giggle, and then say *insert my name* in a super exasperated tone and sigh, then continue without answering. they treated me like i was some sort of dumb dog, and i couldn’t stand it. constantly making snide jokes about me. i took the hint after about a month. they didn’t like me. i couldn’t make them like me. i just accepted it. but as you know, at that time i didn’t really have many other friend group options, and another girl had once left our group and they had talked so much shit about her when she left, and i knew they would do the same if i left. so i stayed.

eventually, in the last month of school, they started being bitchy to LB too. they would basically ignore her on the bus home, give her dry responses, just being typical bitches. it got to a point where we would be walking around at lunch, and the three of them would literally have their backs turned to us while talking under their breath so we weren’t included in whatever they were talking about.

i didn’t mind, i was used to it, but it was starting to get to LB. she cracked when i stopped to tie my lace while she waited for me, and the other three full on speedwalked away from us, no shame. she asked if i had been feeling left out recently, because she definitely had, and i was like “omg finally i’ve been wanting to rant to you about this forever” and i explained to her that they had never really liked me and treated me like shit and we decided to leave.

so we did. and now we’re with group seven, those ex-friends seem to have no problem with either of us. in fact, they treat us like nothing ever happened and treat me the way they did when they liked me.

so that’s something i guess. i’m not going back though. ever.

if you read all the way down to this i love you have a cookie.

❤ THE END❤

[solalunar-eclipse]

Scars You Can’t See - Chapter 2

Chapter title: Escape (from the city)

Word count: about 3500

Some small word choice has been edited.

If you’re here from the updated first chapter, please scroll down to the bolded line! The story continues there.

Previous | Next

Rouge looked out the window cautiously, sliding along the wall and peering around the window frame. She snapped the curtain shut a second later, spinning to face the others. Her eyes were wide. “Crap. They’re here. G.U.N. is here. They want the file- and us, probably. Chaos...I wonder if they want to ‘disappear’ us like in those spy movies.”

“Now who isn’t helping?” Omega said snarkily, aware that Shadow seemed to be on the verge of an actual panic attack. 

Rouge glowered at him, before ignoring his comment entirely. “Alright, we probably have a few minutes, max, before they break down the door and try to get us. Omega, start packing. We need nonperishable food and water in case we can’t show ourselves in public, and we’ll want money. Hang on to our office supplies, too- we might need those. I am going to talk to Shadow and try to help him out a little. Good? Be ready to go in five.”

She sat Shadow down on the couch. His body was shaking slightly and his breathing was unsteady.

“Okay, hon, what’s got you so stressed?”

He shivered silently, refusing to speak- he could be very stubborn when he wanted to be.

Rouge rubbed his back cautiously. “Talk to me, Shadow. Just talk. We can work on solving everything later, but you’ve got to get it out there so that I can help. Please?”

Shadow gave in. Again. His friends were far too good at getting him to open up- words spilled from his mouth faster than he could say them, crashing into each other. “It- it all started when I had to carry the guns again- they were barely tolerable during the invasion, but now all they do is remind me of that day- I can’t help but remember that it was them who did it all to me…”

His voice was tight, but he fought past it. “It makes me sick thinking about it, and the idea that they could do that again. But- they have the power, I don’t want everyone to hate me...what if- what if they do it, tell the world lies about me to retaliate for outing them, and Tails, Silver, Sonic can’t look at me the same? What if they believe G.U.N.?”

Rouge kept her hand on his shoulder, not sure of what else she could do. The bat knew she had only scratched the surface of his struggles, and it was already painful for her to watch. “They won’t! They would never, I can tell you that. Right now, though, we have to focus on making sure we get the word out about this so that G.U.N. can’t do it again, alright? One step at a time. Then we’ll deal with whatever comes next. And I promise Omega and I will always be here for you, no matter what.”

“If you say so...okay.” Shadow sighed. He could deal with this more later. Right now, the agents were here, ready to hurt his friends. They had to run, and Rouge and Omega would support him through everything. That could hold him together. For now.

Omega appeared in the doorway. “Are you ready to go? I do not wish to be turned into scrap metal.”

“Yes.” Shadow said, his voice slightly stronger. “Let’s get out of here.”

------------------------------ STORY CONTINUES HERE ---------------------------------

The three jumped into the high-tech convertible from earlier- now plus two impressively packed suitcases- and peeled out of the garage at full speed. Rouge was driving, since Shadow still wasn’t at a hundred percent. They could all hear the G.U.N. agents shouting behind them as they drove wildly away, but Rouge forced herself to focus on the road despite them.

The hybrid picked up his phone, knowing what he had to do next. It didn’t make this any better, though.

He dialed the number.

“Hello. This is Shadow.”

“Hi, Shads! What’s up! You busy?” an instantly recognizable voice chirped.

“I am in fact busy at the moment. That is why I am calling.”

“Aw, really?” Sonic sounded disappointed. “I was gonna ask if you could come over and race.”

“I’m afraid I cannot. Rouge, Omega and I are currently trying our best to not be captured by about twenty angry G.U.N. agents, so racing is… not an option right now.”

He heard a gasp from the other end of the line. “What?! Wait, what happened? Is there anything you need?”

Shadow smiled faintly- that was Sonic, always looking out for others. “Omega stole some files on my sister and her death. We spoke to G.U.N. beforehand, and they refused to do anything about their actions or even admit wrongdoing, so. We’re calling them out on it by finding proof of what they did.”

“They wouldn’t apologize? For that?!” Sonic yelled. “Jerks! I can’t believe you work for them!”

“Well, I strongly suspect that we are all fired, so that solves that problem.” Shadow replied dryly.

“Good! But you should’ve quit- show them who’s boss! If you need a place to stay while you’re taking them out, you can come crash with us, y’know.”

“That is a kind offer, Sonic, but I’m afraid I must turn you down. G.U.N. is already going to come in and question both you and Tails, and I don’t want you getting in any more trouble than you need.”

Sonic groaned. “Ugh, this whole thing sounds like one of those overly complicated super-secret missions you guys always go on. Or used to go on, whatever. There isn’t any butt-kicking in any of this- wish there was some dude I could beat up and then it’d be fixed.”

Shadow’s smile grew wider. “If only.” Then it faded. “I hope you understand why I won’t be able to tell you where we’re going or what our plans are from now on. The less you know, the safer you are. Despite this, don’t let G.U.N. take you or anyone else anywhere. You might not come back.”

He heard the skepticism in Sonic’s voice. “Seriously? You think so?”

“I know so. Be careful, Sonic. These people aren’t crazy geniuses- they’re ruthless destroyers. Trust me. And...we’re all going to shut down our phones. We could be tapped or tracked at any time. We’ll only call in from public phones or the like.”

“Oh, chaos….this really is serious, isn’t it?” Sonic’s voice was small. “Hang on, put me on speaker.”

Shadow did. “You’re on now.”

“Guys?” Sonic said. “You’re all awesome- I know you’re gonna make them pay. Just don’t die on me, we need you for movie night.” he said, only half joking.

“We will do our best.” Omega replied.

“Tell Knux I love him, ‘kay?” Rouge shouted. 

“Will do!” Sonic replied, giggling. 

Shadow took him off speaker and told him so. 

“Sonic…stay safe. Please. I know you like to be the one who saves the day, but not this time, alright?”

The hero sounded tense. “Fine. But if I don’t hear from you guys for three days, I’m gonna start freaking out. You hear me?”

Shadow laughed bitterly. “I’ll make sure that doesn’t happen. I’d hate to come back and find your house destroyed.”

“Yeah…” Sonic said weakly.

The hybrid sighed. “I suppose I must go now. Tell everyone else, alright? I’ll confirm what you say via text before I shut down my phone.”

“Okay. Bye, Shads- talk to ya later!” Sonic made an effort to sound cheerful.

“Talk to you soon.” Shadow said, and then he ended the call.

Rouge grinned. “Awww, that’s sweet. Done talking to your boyfriend, Shadow?”

“He is not my boyfriend!” Shadow roared, blushing. “We’re only rivals, Rouge, get that idea out of your head now!”

“Suuure~” Rouge said, laughing at Shadow’s embarrassment.

They became serious again quickly, however. Rouge hadn’t quite managed to lose the agents yet. She drove through two alleyways (“I just cleaned the car yesterday…” Omega complained), ran several red lights, and played one horrible game of chicken with a streetcar before they were able to get away.

Shadow had nearly had multiple heart attacks by the time that was over.

He heard his phone ping with a message while he was in the middle of switching off the other two. Of course Rouge had the latest iCall 11, while Omega had a 10 that Rouge had gifted him.

Shadow himself had a Candystripe (shameful, he knew, but they were easier for him to use), and that was at least partly why the group always messaged through Entropy.

He opened it up to see Sonic’s ten texts.

--

sanic: hey guys shads just called

he & rouge & omega are running from gun

they stole some important files about maria (sorry about the name drop shadow)

& gun got stupid mad

they wouldn’t say sorry or do anything about what they did to her either

so i really wanna beat someone up for that ୧(๑•̀ᗝ•́)૭

team dark is kinda scared for their lives now bc of gun so we can’t text them for a while or anything cuz they’re turning off their phones

oh and knux rouge says she loves u

i’d make a joke but tbh i’m actually freaking out a little rn

this sounds crazy i kno but it’s true

milesperhour: Wait, what? Are you serious??

andknuckles: Rouge, stay safe, alright

Don’t get hurt

--

Shadow smirked. “Your boyfriend wants you to stay safe. He’s worried.”

Rouge blushed. “He’s sweet, isn’t he?”

--

notclairvoyantjustpsychic: WHAT 

CHAOS THEY DID NOT

edgehog: Yes, they did. Unfortunately. I’ve passed your message along, Knuckles. Please don’t scream, Silver.

Goodbye for now. We’ll get in touch later.

--

Shadow shut off his phone after that, but not before he saw one last private text.

--

sanic: i’m gonna miss u shads…. T-T

--

Shadow sighed quietly as he and his friends drove out of the city. He and Sonic had grown pretty close, and the blue hero was the only person outside of Team Dark whom he truly trusted.

He would most definitely miss Sonic as well.

...

Once the three had driven for the rest of the day- Omega took over once Rouge got tired- they pulled off into a small motel out in the plains of the United Federation.

A neon “Vacant” sign flickered faintly as the wind rushed through the golden fields. The sign for Cloud 9 Motel was faded and weatherbeaten, and there was only one other car in the parking lot. The sandstone-colored building was shaped like a blocky U, the front desk vaguely visible through clouded windows.

Shadow walked over to the motel doors and pushed them open, pulling out some money to pay for a room. Omega went with him- the robot needed to charge, and Rouge wanted some privacy for a minute.

The bat found an old pay phone off to the side and took a turn calling Knuckles. She stood there quietly, watching the sunset as she waited for him to pick up.

“Hi, sweetie.”

“Rouge?! It’s you?” She heard him shout away from the phone. “Sonic! Tails! It’s Rouge calling!”

She smiled quietly, but couldn’t quite bring herself to laugh. “You’re with your friends, hm?”

“Yeah- we’re figuring out what to do.”

Rouge frowned. “Don’t do anything- didn’t Sonic tell you what Shadow said? This is dangerous!”

Knuckles scoffed. “Dangerous? I led the Resistance against the Eggman Empire! Don’t talk to me about danger!”

Rouge facepalmed. She loved Knuckles so, so much, but he could be such an idiot sometimes.

“Yes, but the difference is, Eggman launched full-scale attacks that you could plan for. G.U.N. will not hesitate to shoot you in the back as you hang out with your friends.” 

“People would do that?!” Knuckles shouted. He was still awfully naive about the world, and Rouge tended to forget this occasionally.

“They absolutely would. I need you to promise me that you, Sonic, and Tails will stay out of this.”

“But what about you?” he asked. “And Omega and Shadow?”

“I see you’re even worried about him, hm? Well, don’t worry about us- we’re used to dealing with these guys.” Rouge snickered. 

Knuckles groaned. “I don’t hate Shadow, I just don’t really like him either. And he’s in danger too.”

“Thank you, hon.” she said honestly, appreciating that the echidna was starting to care about her friend. At least a little.

“I should probably go soon, but we’re currently at a motel in the middle of nowhere- I can’t tell you which one- and we’ll start planning our next move. Talk to you later, alright?”

“Talk to you later. Love you…” Knuckles said nervously. She could practically hear him blushing on the other end.

“Love you too, Knuckles. Bye!”

She hung up the phone and leaned against the glass wall of the booth, already missing him. He was really such a kind person underneath all that bluster, and that’s what she’d fallen for in the first place.

She looked up, noticing that Shadow left the building. He walked across the parking lot and opened up the door. “You’ll see him again soon, Rouge. All we have to do is get this footage and then we’ll be back home.”

“I know, it’s nothing.” she said softly.

The hybrid stood awkwardly for a moment, before quietly extending his arms. The gesture looked incredibly strange, but Rouge knew what he was trying to do and really appreciated it. She hugged him tightly and smiled. “You’re a good friend, Shadow.”

He held her a little tighter. “Take a look at yourself- you’re willing to go to Chaos-knows-where just to help me find some old video.”

She pulled back and smiled at him. “That’s what friends are for, right? Now let’s go check out that room.”

Shadow scuffed at the ground, sighing loudly. “Before you go in, you should know I used false names for all of us- the woman at the desk didn’t seem to know who any of us were, though she did say I looked like Sonic.” He didn’t seem pleased with that.

“I called Omega ‘Theta’ because it was the first idea I had. I haven’t given you a name yet because I thought you’d want your own…...less lame one.”

“Good...but what’s yours?” Rouge asked, smirking.

“I was on the spot.” Shadow couldn’t meet her eyes. “I used Apophis as my name. The ancient mythical chaos snake. It sounds so formal….”

Rouge grinned but held in her laugh for his sake. Shadow, despite his emo appearance, was definitely a nerd. 

“My name should be….Ruby. Like the gem.”

Shadow looked confused. “Why?”

“Because of my name, silly. It means ‘red’ in French, and rubies are red.” Rouge said lightly.

“Oh….I suppose that makes sense.” he muttered, looking a little bewildered.

They went up to the room and discovered that Omega had already plugged himself into the outlet in the wall. He looked up when Rouge and Shadow walked in. “This electricity is subpar, but it will suit my purposes.” he informed them.

Rouge couldn’t help teasing him a little. “What, does it taste bad or something?”

Omega would have rolled his eyes, if he could. “No. It is simply weak and limited so that you organics do not electrocute yourselves.”

The bat surveyed the room critically, noting the lack of certain furniture. “Really, Shadow? You know Knuckles is going to pound you into the ground if he finds out we shared a bed.”

“It was cheaper.” Shadow called flatly from the closet, over the noise of his attempt to put away the suitcases. “We don’t have an endless supply of money, and I can sleep in the desk chair if you have an issue with this.”

“No, no, I’m fine.” Rouge replied. “Besides, he knows that I’ve never been into that kind of thing. Or dating you, no offense.”

“Agreed, and none taken.” The hybrid came back out and sank down onto the bed. “Omega, would you mind pulling up the schematics of the G.U.N. facility we’re trying to break into? I know you were heading in that general direction, but where is it, and how would we get inside?”

“Processing. You know, you are very lucky that I downloaded all schematics early on in our work with G.U.N..”

“Very lucky that you got lost once and then refused to have it happen again, you mean,” Rouge shot back.

“We do not speak of that incident. Ever.”

“Alright, alright, now where are we breaking in?” Shadow snapped, his quills bristling. He looked tense, Rouge noticed. She sat down next to Shadow and gave him a quiet look to try and calm him down. He sighed.

“Schematic loaded. Accessing…”

Suddenly, a three-dimensional map of the facility appeared in the room, along with an address in the lower right corner of the display. Rouge patted Shadow’s back once before getting up to survey the map- as a thief, she was the most experienced and therefore the authority on breaking and entering. And stealing, of course.

“So,” she said after a moment, “we’re definitely going in through the side door. While the vents are more classic, they’re also a greater hazard and Omega wouldn’t fit. Sorry, Omega.”

“That is fine.”

“So, we’ll grab a couple of delivery uniforms- and we will return them, don’t worry-” she added, for Shadow’s benefit. She knew he didn’t like doing anything that would hurt people just trying to get by.

“-and then we can get inside through that door. We’ll navigate the halls and head straight to the video storage rooms, which are here.” Rouge pointed to a specific area of the map, which Omega helpfully enlarged. “We’re going to need to split up and search them quickly. Most likely, the video will be on a VHS tape, so that’s what we’re looking for. G.U.N. is nothing if not organized, so they’ll probably just have a box labeled ‘ARK Files’. Everyone clear?”

“Yes.”

“Affirmative.”

“Now then, there are guards on a rotating schedule that pass by the same area every fifteen minutes. We’ll need to avoid them and move quickly, because we don’t want to be seen. I know we could take out two guards if necessary, but we don’t want any of them radioing in to the security center and setting off an alarm.”

“I will remove any threat before it becomes too big to handle, no matter what.” Omega declared. 

“I’m not sure that’s the point of a stealth mission, Omega.” Shadow replied, a small smile on his face. 

Rouge noticed that this was the first time he’d smiled properly in a while.

“Alright, now let’s get some rest. We’re going to need it for the next few days.”

“The next few days?” Omega asked. “Why are we not attacking them tomorrow?”

“Because they’ll be expecting us tomorrow, Omega- all of G.U.N. is going to be on high alert.” Rouge said, exasperated. “We have to lie low for a while, make them drop their guard.”

Shadow sighed. “I can’t stand waiting, but if it means we’ll be safer, I suppose we have no choice.”

“Good.” Rouge replied, going into her “team mom” mode. “Now. Rest.”

It was strange for her sometimes, being the leader of the team. Shadow and Omega both acted younger than her, even though their ages were incredibly confusing. Shadow was either five, fifteen, or fifty-five, depending on how you counted, and Omega was essentially ageless. Yet somehow she, at eighteen, was the team leader in most situations. 

She certainly didn’t mind it, though.

As she lay in bed at night, her attempts to sleep were quickly foiled by the hedgehog next to her. Shadow could not lie still.

“Are you always like...this, Shadow?” she asked, trying her best to be polite. 

“...no…” he mumbled quietly, turning away from her. 

“This is a really stressful time for you, isn’t it?” she asked gently. 

He lay there for a moment.

“Perhaps.” he said finally, his voice flat.

Rouge thought about what to do next. 

“Omega, what’s the length of your charging cable?”

“Twelve feet. Why do you ask?”

“Get in.”

Shadow sat up quickly. “Wait- what?!”

Rouge smirked. “Get in, Omega. It’s time for a team hug session.”

Shadow attempted to protest, but Omega climbed onto the bed anyway and lay down on the hybrid’s other side. 

Rouge watched Shadow, feeling relieved when he began to relax. Omega’s computers were whirring away softly, providing a steady background hum that pushed her friend to sleep.

He sighed, murmuring quietly. “Good night, Omega. Sleep well, Rouge.”

“Night, boys.” she said.

“I will keep watch while you both sleep. Just in case.” Omega replied.

Shadow’s eyes began to close. “Heh. Thanks…. Omega……”

Rouge shut her eyes as well, pleased with herself. This was her team, and they were going to kick G.U.N. to the curb. But that could wait for tomorrow- right now, it was late, and she could rest. Finally.

[likeshipsonthesea]

don’t fuss over me

happy two am i stayed up writing this instead of the *checks smudged writing on my hands* smirfteen different wips on my desktop enjoy the angst

title from hozier’s cherry wine bc. i felt like it

warnings for homophobia and anxiety mentions

         In the spring, Nursey and Dex drive up to Maine over a long weekend.

         One of Dex’s cousins is having a baby and the shower happens to coincide with a rare day off from classes and only one practice, which someone convinces Dex to miss despite his captainly insistence he be there. They pack up Dex’s pick-up and make the three hour drive with Nursey misreading directions and dictating the playlist and Dex tapping away at the steering wheel while ignoring mostly everything but the road.

         Nursey does his best to distract, when they reach Dex’s childhood home and his parents welcome them in with step-late smiles and frequent breaks of silence, when Dex’s brother Jay drops by with his girlfriend and makes just-a-bit-off jokes as they talk in the living room, when they get ready for bed ignoring his parents’ intent glances at the fact they’ll be sharing a bed.

         “I should probably sleep on the couch,” Dex says, sitting on the closed toilet seat as Nursey brushes his teeth.

         “That’s dumb,” Nursey says, gargled. “They know we’re dating.”

         “I know, but.” Dex curls his hands over his bare knees. He’s in a pair of boxers and an old t-shirt. He’s soft and smudged looking and Nursey wants to wrap his arms around him. “I want to make it easier on them. They’re—trying.”

         Nursey spits. “Then let them get used to reality,” he says, rinsing in between sentences. “They’re adults, Dex. They can handle their son sharing a bed with his boyfriend.”

         Dex shrugs and stands, stretching. “I guess.”

         Nursey hands him his toothbrush. “If they can deal with Kelsey and Jay canoodling on the couch all night they can deal with us sharing a bed in a separate room.”

         Dex huffs, smiling. “They were pretty gross, huh.”

         “Exceedingly.”

         Dex shakes his head and takes his toothbrush. His fingertips, callused in places from his guitar playing, skim Nursey’s. Nursey inhales sharply, quietly, and his chest flutters the way it did in the beginning of their relationship every time Dex so much as bumped their shoulders.

         Dex turns on the faucet, wetting the brush, and does not appear to notice.

         Nursey sits down on the toilet lid and folds his knees into his chest, watching Dex apply toothpaste. It’s only been a few hours here, in Maine, amongst Dex’s family, but already Nursey’s body aches at the need to be touched. In a totally non-sexual, totally not needy, totally chill way.

         It’s just. Nursey fiddles with the cuff of his pajama pants. It’s just that he hadn’t realized until they got to Maine how much Dex touched him on a regular basis.

         Nursey hasn’t been in many relationships aside from Dex—the people at Andover were Not Great and there was only a short window of time between when he arrived at Samwell and when he became rather obsessed with a jerkish ginger—so he doesn’t have much to compare with re: the amount of touching. How much Dex touches him is just how much Dex touches him. Nursey doesn’t exactly know how to quantify it, relatively.

         It’s also difficult to tell what’s intentional boyfriend touching and what’s just the byproduct of living around one another full-time. Who knows if the brush of fingers as Dex hands him a plate as they wash dishes is intentional or not? Bumping shoulders after practice could just be an encouragement thing from a proud captain on Dex’s part. Team movie nights basically necessitate cuddling if they’re all to fit on the scant sitting space.

         The intentional boyfriend touching is easier to distinguish, as Nursey’s unchill chest tends to get all fluttery at those things. Like, side hugs before leaving in the morning with an added temple kiss, if Dex is particularly mushy that day. Or the curl of Dex’s fingers around Nursey’s ankle when he shoves his feet in Dex’s lap while they study together. Or that thing Dex does when Nursey buries his nose between Dex’s shoulder blades as he cooks and Dex will reach behind him to squeeze Nursey’s hip and leave his hand there despite how one-handedness negatively affects his maneuverability.

         And it isn’t that Nursey doesn’t acknowledge any of this touching, the ambiguous and certain alike, but, well. They’ve been dating for almost a year now. It’s all kind of started to bleed together into normalcy. The fluttering and slight breathlessness at the beginning, at every little brush of hands, has now become a sort of seeping warmth, mellow and soft in Nursey’s chest, his body settling instinctively at the comfort.

         Dex swishes water around in his mouth, divesting it of all the toothpaste taste. Nursey smiles into his knee. Dex hates the taste of mint but says his mouth doesn’t feel clean unless he uses a mint toothpaste, so he suffers and then spends a year washing out his mouth, every morning and night. One time he tortured Nursey after a pack of mint gum by refusing to kiss him.

         Dex spits out his last wash and turns to Nursey. “Ready to sleep?” he asks, hip propped against the sink.

         Nursey drops his feet to the floor and spreads his knees apart. “Come here,” he says, making mild grabby hands.

         Dex huffs, his not-quite-a-laugh-but-not-quite-not-one, and steps forward. Nursey presses his palms into Dex’s lower back and tugs him closer, resting his cheek against Dex’s lower belly. Dex’s hands come up to encircle Nursey’s head.

         “You okay?” Dex asks, quiet.

         “Yeah.” Nursey nuzzles into Dex’s pilfered Sharks t-shirt. “I just missed you.”

         A soft rumble of laughter buzzes against Nursey’s cheek. “I’ve been next to you all day.”

         Nursey hums and tugs him closer.

         Dex pets at the back of Nursey’s head lazily. Nursey can somehow tell by the way his fingers drag that Dex is falling asleep on his feet. Nursey squeezes once more and releases him. When he tilts his head back to look up at Dex, Dex’s eyelids slide heavy and low.

         “Come on, sleepy.” Nursey nudges him back until there’s room to stand. “Let’s get you in a bed before you collapse.”

         Dex yawns and does not protest. He leans into Nursey as they walk the scant feet to the door of the bathroom, but pulls back once they’re in the hall. Nursey can hear the Poindexters fiddling about downstairs, but that does not seem to matter.

         Inside Dex’s bedroom, Dex crawls instantly to the far side of the bed. Nursey lets the door slip shut on its own and follows.

         “I’m little spoon tonight,” he whispers across the pillow.

         Dex frowns, eyes closed. “You got to be little spoon last night.”

         Nursey pokes his hip and begins turning over. “Yes, and I’ll be it tomorrow, too, because I am a wonderful boyfriend who endures the harsh Maine weather for you.”

         Dex grumbles, “It’s fifty degrees out,” but wraps his arm around Nursey’s side anyway. Nursey wriggles back until he’s comfortably pressed against Dex’s front and reaches out to turn off the light, settling into bed. “Goodnight, Nursey,” Dex says, breath warm against Nursey’s ear. “Sweet dreams, or whatever.”

         Nursey laughs, and by the time it’s settled in his chest, Dex is softly wheezing into Nursey’s skin. Nursey smiles into the darkness and presses his hand into Dex’s, resting over his stomach.

         In the moments of loss, it’s hard to feel anything but. When Nursey passes Dex the peas at dinner and no part of their hands brush. When they sit on the couch next to one another without knees pressed together, even momentarily. When they walk up the stairs, Nursey in front, and Dex doesn’t pinch his butt as they’ve taken to doing for maximum boyfriend annoyance.

         The space between them, the chasm where their shared warmth should be, fills Nursey’s chest much like anxiety. He knows, logically, that it isn’t him. He knows about the silences and the looks and the phone calls that end with tentative I love yous unsure of their unconditional reciprocation, and a part of him hates Dex’s family, this town, for it all. But Nursey’s anxiety is something of an opportunist, and logic so rarely is consulted in anxious matters.

         Nonetheless, with Dex’s arm around him in this dark, wheezing room, Nursey allows himself the solace. He fills his chest with every point of contact and tells himself that, tomorrow, it will be enough.

[babybluebex]

sunshine (rami malek)

dad!rami melts my heart so here have this i’m in my feels and have baby fever and this was originally a deacy thing but i changed it to rami bc we as a fandom deserve dad!rami now i’m rambling LOL 

song: electric love by børns

word count: 2448

My hands were shaking and I could barely breathe. Rami didn’t deserve this sort of thing. He was in London filming No Time To Die, he didn’t need any distractions. His character, the villainous Safin opposite Agent 007, was so different from his usual goofy self, and he usually stayed in character because of how difficult it was to slip in and out of the role. When I told him that I was pregnant, I knew that he would drop everything and come back to me, and while that was the dream response, I couldn’t ask that of him. It wasn’t fair not to tell him, though.

I grabbed my phone and carefully dialed my boyfriend’s number, and I waited as I listened to the dial tone. The time difference meant that his day was over and I hated to wake him up from a much-needed sleep, but it couldn’t wait.

The call was answered, and I heard Rami mumble, “Stella? Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, umm...” I began. “I just... Hell. I just found out that, uh... You have to promise me that you stay in London. You can’t drop everything, I can handle this by myself. Promise me, Ram.”

“Yeah, yeah, I promise,” Rami said sleepily. “What’s up?”

“I...” I began and dug my fingernails into my palms. “I’m pregnant.”

“What?” Rami said. “Wait, hold on. You’re pregnant?”

I chewed on my bottom lip. “Yeah,” I mumbled.

“Stella!” Rami exclaimed and laughed. “Seriously?”

“I wouldn’t joke, Rami,” I said with a light chuckle.

“And you really expect me to stay here?” Rami asked. “Are you crazy? How far along are you?”

“Just passed the first trimester,” I said. “I had no clue at all, I just thought it was my meds or whatever, but... Rami. We’re gonna have a boy.”

Rami’s laughter was unbridled glee. “A boy?” He repeated. “A boy! Stella, a boy... Oh, wow. Thank you. Thank you so much.”

“Why’re you thanking me?” I asked.

“Because you’re giving me a baby!” Rami said. “A boy... Oh, wow. Shit, I promised you I would stay here. Be really careful, yeah? And call Sami, he and his wife’ll help you until I can get home.”

“Okay,” I chuckled. “I know it’s late, I’ll let you sleep.”

Rami scoffed. “As if I can sleep now with the image of a pregnant you in my head,” he said. “Do you have a name in mind?”

“I was thinking Saïd,” I said softly. “Share a name with his Baba.”

“I’m Baba,” Rami laughed. “I’m a dad. Oh, goddamn it, Stella. I love you so much. So much.”

Now came the part that I was really concerned about. “I...” I started. “My family will hate it and so will yours, but I don’t wanna get married because of him. I dunno, I just don’t want that.”

“Okay,” Rami agreed. “Done. I love you so much, you know that? Filming’s gonna end soon and I’ll be home and we’ll do this together.”

“Thank you,” I said. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Rami said. “I’m gonna try to sleep, but I don’t make many promises.” 

“Sounds good,” I laughed. “Goodnight, Ram. Sleep well.”

“Thank you so much, Stella,” Rami said. “Again, thank you.” 

The second and third trimester passed like it was nothing. Rami got home a few weeks into the second, just in time to see my bump start to grow, and, in the middle of LAX, he dropped to his knees and kissed my belly. He was such a goof, but I loved how deeply he cared for our baby. 

The press got hold of the news quickly, and soon Rami was being bombarded with questions. We decided to keep the gender a secret, only divulging that we did in fact have a name picked out. Rami insisted on painting our spare bedroom for Saïd, and we chose a nice soft blue for the walls.

My mother was less than thrilled when we told her. She was happy, of course, but the fact that Rami and I were not going to get married or even engaged vexed her. Rami’s mother was more of the same, but she came to terms with it the first time she felt Saïd kick her hand.

Rami was such a dutiful father-to-be. He helped me stand up when my back hurt, massaged my shoulders for me, always made sure I was eating enough. Every night before bed, we had a small tradition where Rami would lay between my legs with his mouth pressed against my belly, and he would whisper to his son and tell him about his day. Sometimes they would ‘talk’ for almost an hour. I watched Rami as he did this, the way his muscles flexed under his skin as he situated himself to better speak to his son, the twinkle in his blue eyes when a gentle kick came to his cheek, and how he ran his fingers through his dark curls with bemusement once every five minutes. It was still hard for him to believe that he was going to be a father, and Saïd was already a spoiled little boy, just by his father’s love.

My due date was in early June. Our sweet summer boy was only a few weeks away. I made my way into the kitchen and sighed loudly, and I said, “Rami. No, sir, not today.”

“Why not?” Rami asked curiously. He moved the pan off of the stove and came over to me and he gently kissed my messy hair.

“It’s your birthday, jackass,” I chuckled. “I’m supposed to treat you to breakfast. Or did you miss that memo?”

“Didn’t miss it,” Rami shrugged. “Just decided to ignore it. Anyway, I like taking care of you two. Making you and Saïd breakfast is the least I can do.”

I sighed. “Fine,” I grumbled. I slowly sat myself down at the table, and Rami delivered me a cup of hot tea with a kiss on my nose. The whole no-caffeine thing was a real killer but, after eight months, I had gotten used to the taste of decaf everything. I took a sip of the tea and said, “The first thing I’m gonna do once the munchkin’s out is have a cup of coffee.”

“Sounds like a good plan,” Rami said. “Any specific coffee I can pick up for your first cup?”

“Surprise me,” I mumbled sleepily. My back spasmed in pain, and I clenched my teeth together. “Hi, baby,” I whispered and rubbed my belly. An aching back was always the signal that Saïd was awake. “Good morning, little man.”

“He awake?” Rami asked.

“Yeah,” I said. Rami abandoned what he was doing to come kneel down by my chair, and he lifted my t-shirt to see my belly. It was covered in dark stretch marks, but he always took care to kiss every single one every night as he talked to Saïd. He never wanted me to feel bad about any part of myself— ever, really, but especially when I was giving him “the best gift” that he could ask for.

“Hey, you,” Rami cooed. “Are you awake? Gonna kick for me?”

My back ached again, and I reached down and massaged my lower back with my fingertips. “God, this sucks,” I mumbled.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Rami said softly. “Anything I can do to help?”

“Umm...” I began and stopped suddenly. My pants felt damp. That wasn’t unusual, because I had begun to sweat like a pig during the night, but it was strange that the butt of my pants was dry and my thighs were wet. I looked down in confusion, and I pushed Rami away quickly. Jesus, I did not want him sitting in a puddle of pre-labor fluid. Not pre; I was in labor. “Fuck.”

“What?” Rami asked quickly. “What’s wrong?”

“My water just broke,” I said slowly. “I can’t go to the hospital until contractions are about four minutes apart, so start timing them for me. I’ll be—“ I paused to grunt at the pain. “Slightly distracted.”

“Holy shit, Stells,” Rami said quickly. “Okay, I’ll call Sami and let him know, and— Is that a contraction? Right now?”

“According to Lamaze classes, yes,” I said. I stood up carefully and took Rami’s hands, and I said, “Apparently, Saïd does not wanna miss your birthday.”

Rami laughed. “He sure doesn’t,” he said. “Tell me when the next one starts. I’ll get you some new clothes and pack a bag.”

—

I was in the hospital by lunchtime. The contractions were nowhere as painful as Grey’s Anatomy made them out to be; they hurt like hell, don’t get me wrong, but I wasn’t shrieking in agony. A small grunt of pain, but that was about it. I was in a private room— probably because of Rami’s celebrity— and Rami sat next to my bed, holding my hand. We had his phone tilted up and were watching various documentaries on Netflix to pass the time, and then a knock came on the door. The door opened just a peek to show a pair of blue eyes, and I grinned. “Hey, Sam,” I said cheerfully. “How were your classes?”

“I was distracted as hell all day,” Sami laughed. “I got the call from Ram before second block and that just messed up my concentration for the rest of the day. But how are you guys?”

“Good,” I said. “A little tired, but excited.”

“That’s great,” Sami said. “It’s good that you both are calm. When Rosie was born, all bets were off for me.”

I nodded. I remembered Sami being a hot mess the day his daughter was born, and the memory brought a smile to Rami’s face. “You might be waiting a while,” he told his twin. “The doctors say it won’t happen until tomorrow morning if we’re lucky.”

“That’s fine,” Sami said. “I have no problem with that.” 

“Happy birthday, Sami,” I chuckled.

“That would be really funny,” Sami said. “If Saïd was born today. Three birthdays on the same day in the same family.”

“Yeah, don’t jinx it,” Rami chuckled. “Bri texted me and said he’d be coming by soon.”

“Dr. May?” I clarified, and Rami nodded. He and Brian had grown incredibly close since BoRhap, even to the point where we asked him and his wife to be Saïd’s godparents; they accepted without hesitation. “Ah, that’ll be nice. He’s such a cool guy.”

Saïd decided to make his appearance before Brian could show up. The contractions became longer and tougher, forcing a few hard breaths from my lungs, and panic began to set it when the midwife made Rami and Sami leave the room. “He’s the— Rami’s the father,” I protested quickly. “Can’t he stay?”

“We’ll get him scrubbed up and he’ll be back soon, dear,” a gentle nurse told me, but that didn’t stop my eyes welling up with tears.

Rami squeezed my hand once more before being ushered away. Soon after that, I had my epidural, and I was only mentally half in the room after that. Rami came back, all dressed up in sterile scrubs, and he held my hand and encouraged me the whole time. “Good job, good job,” he whispered to me. He brushed my hair off of my forehead and kissed my cheek, and he said, “Doc’s saying to push, Stella. C’mon, you can do it. Good, good, just like that.”

I was more aware of what Rami was doing than what I was doing. I watched a mixture of surprise and happiness flit across his face, and I distantly heard a nurse exclaim, “It’s a girl!”

“A girl?” I asked. “We were told...?”

All thoughts left my head as the nurse tugged down the neck of my gown and laid my daughter on my bare chest. She was wailing, her olive skin all wrinkled up, a soft swirl of black on the top of her head. I cooed at her and kissed her forehead, and her wails died down to small hiccups. “Clara,” I whispered. “Clara?”

Rami smiled. He was crying, and he leaned down and kissed my lips. “Clara,” He said when he pulled away. “My gorgeous, gorgeous little Clara.”

Clara was taken to be cleaned and weighed, and Rami held me tightly. “You did it,” he said. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” I whispered. “And Clara. Clara Malek.”

“No, she’d have your last name,” Rami said. “Clara Lee.”

“No,” I said softly. “I know I said I didn’t wanna get married, but that was before Clara was a tangible human. I can’t imagine not being married to you as we raise her.”

“This is the best birthday I’ve ever had, no debate,” Rami said with a smile.

Clara was brought back quickly, and she was swaddled up in a delicate yellow blanket with a knitted yellow cap over her small head. She was quiet now, her plump lips forming a perfect o as she breathed, her olive skin filled with a red blush of blood and life. I held her closely and kissed her head, and I carefully gave her to Rami. He looked down at her, a spitting image of himself, and I swear that I have never seen him more in love with anything or anyone. “Clara,” He said softly. “I’m never gonna let anyone hurt you, ya hear me? Baba will protect you until the day I die.”

Sami came in and fawned over Clara, holding her and commenting on her little dimpled cheeks. Sami’s wife took a picture of him holding her, then she said, “Ram, Stells, would you like a picture?”

“Sure,” I said. “I look like a mess but I wanna capture the moment.”

Rami was sitting on the edge of the hospital bed as I held Clara, burying a kiss in my messy and sweaty hair. His eyes were closed blissfully and I smiled down at Clara with every ounce of love in my body. My sweet little daughter.

Rami uploaded the picture to his Instagram after a nearly year-long drought of uploads. ​Hello all​, he captioned it. Help me welcome Clara Habibah Malek. We were told that Clara was to be a boy and we planned on the name Saïd Christopher, but she decided on surprising us. Clara is what we came up with for the replacement for Saïd, and Habibah is Arabic for beloved child. It feels accurate, because she has a whole world of people who love her. Thank you all for supporting us on this journey, and we hope that you stay with us. Sincerely, Rami Malek and Stella Malek. 

[catunionsteward]

Highlights of the game grumps live in Denver

FIRST GAME GRUMPS LIVE SHOW IN DENVER!!

Vernon said we were already the most hype audience he’s seen on the tour

We made his night because he flubbed in NY and tried making a joke about answering emails that no one laughed at

Vernon ALWAYS coming out late when he’s called lol

Vernon going through the crowd and scuttling like a crab while doing the pinch motion of a crab

I FINALLY GOT TO BE ON TEAM WALUIGI

Dan constantly warning people that the stairs for the stage are very steep and to be careful was v sweet

Dan being the hype man for my side having us chant things and then doing the slicing movement to get us to stop which we immediately did

Dan later on after doing this for the 3rd time - “ you guys are great at this I’m getting drunk with power!” LMAO

Arin- “okay what is your favorite sandwich to hype people up” team toad person - “tuna sandwich” Dan- “that has got to be the stupidest goddamn question I have ever heard in my life you’re embarrassing us arin, * turns to fan* okay so what’s your favorite type of sandwich.” team waluigi person- “also tuna” team waluigi at the top of our lung- “ALSO TUNA *clap clap clap clap clap*”

Why did they bother to do boob jiggle physics for waluigi - Dan Avidan 2019

Dan- “I hate to lose but I almost love it when I do because Yoshihiro does this” and proceeds to wiggle his butts on stage and arin saying “peach is just fainted next to him like dat ass!!” Because of course Arin was losing poor guy

Dan having the sound people turn the sounds of the game completely off and asking us to golf clap becuase it amuses him and is doing pretty well and Dan being so happy because we’re the first audience where someone hasn’t done a loud clap to fuck it up on purpose

Said golf clap being both weird and amazing because it was at least 1,000 people golf clapping

A FAN FUCKING DID A BACKFLIP ON STAGE HOLY SHIT DUDE!!!

Dan- “okay so what’s your favorite type of Italian food, YEAH THATS RIGHT ITS A LEGITAMITE QUESTION!!” Team waluigi person answers and people on team toad just cheer for their person because he did a GODDAMN BACKFLIP he doesn’t need to say SHIT to hype people up!

Poor Arin getting booed for all the stuff that goes wrong :( he was like IM TRYING MY BEST!

The final person that goes up for my team screaming MARK ZUKERBURG to hype us up

Us chanting mark zukerburg intermitently

The top of your lungs life or death screaming done during the final vs match on both sides

Team toad won :( ( congrats though team toad it was close!)

Grumps saying we were the loudest audience they’ve had on the tour

Then went the questions from the audience which were priceless

If you could chose any STD to become a human which one would it be?

Arin-“Gonorrhea because it will be GONEorrha or crabs because they’d be like ag ag ag ag ag *does pinchy motions*”

Dan- “Crabs bc they would be applauding me at all times “

What’s the favorite song you guys have ener written?

Dan- “The simple plot of kingdom hearts or the first Zelda one about the guys dick because it was one of the first one we wrote for starbomb and I was like can't believe this became a band”

Arin-“I was really proud of the Tetris song because of how well it flowed.”

Who would you like to revoice if you had the chance?

Arin- “honestly sonic *loud cheering* because I can’t beat the original voice actors they were amazing at it”

Dan - “tails because he's closest to my futsona” hdhdhdhdhd

To Dan: What is the gayest tying ninja Brian has ever said to you?

Dan- ”Let's have sex is pretty up there and he says this weekly”

Arin- “He did write an entire fan fiction about it”

Dan- “He actually wrote a second one called bjs through time where he goes to the 1800s just to blow you know what never mind”

Arin- “When are you publishing an audio book of it?”

Please for the love of god let us see those fan fictions

A fan said they were sorry for bringing up a band during their dead rising stream because they seemed upset about it

Arin and Dan telling him it’s completely fine that it’s all good and then arin going:

Arin- “THEY WERE STEALING OUR FANS!!!”

Dan- “We looked and broke it down and it was only like 3 fans”

Arin- “THOSE WERE 3 REALLY GOOD FANS THOUGH!! All of our fans are really good fans *winks at the audience*”

Who would you like to have on guest grumps?

Arin- “Gordon Ramsey.”

Dan- “Andy Sandburg or Jack Black.”

If you could go back in time before face to face ass to ass what would you tell your past self about each other?

Arin- “lay off the gay jokes for a year he needs to ease into it very much so”

Danny- “get ready for a lot of farts it's not gunna be okay it's gunna start off not okay and it's never gunna get better (Arin’s face is red af).”

Someone saying I love you Dan and not to Arin which you could kind of tell hurt his feelings so me and a couple of other people yelling out I LOVE YOU ARIN!!! Which I hope cheered him up even a little bit

Pls give Arin love

Dan and Arin rapping at the end of the show to one of the newest starbomb songs

It was a good last show, I’m sad they’re not doing this style anymore but I’m looking forward to what they plan on next!