fallingsunflower

[fallingsunflower]

All day I’ve been thinking about him in shock like If it was a fake news yk, now it’s 2 am and it’s really hitting me like a train, I’m a mess. Thinking that the band will never be together anymore, and if they do nothing will be the same without him. My teenage years are coming back in my head and I feel so devastated and empty, I can’t even be on tik tok he’s everywhere and it really hurts.

I totally get it. I just had a cry over him 😭 it doesn’t feel real yet it does you know?

[fallingsunflower]

Seeing all of the 1D guys’ posts make it seem more “real” now if that makes sense. It’s not just a bad dream, and this hurts! 😭

I’m having a hard time processing it tbh 😭 like it still doesn’t feel real. It feels like a sick joke

[fallingsunflower]

.

[fallingsunflower]

💔

[fallingsunflower]

feeling grief over someone who shaped part of your childhood / teenage years ≠ excusing his actions.

you can grieve someone and still not like them or agree with their actions. a reminder that two things can be true at once.

[fallingsunflower]

This brings up so many complex emotions. I know he hasn’t been the best person and I hope no one blames maya for this (I know how fans can be), I’m also grieving such a huge part of my childhood that has just ceased to exist now

[fallingsunflower]

Idk who needs to hear this but it's okay to be sad over the loss of someone you've never met. It's okay to mourn a celebrity. It's okay to grieve over a stranger

[fallingsunflower]

it's crazy to think that memories you've had for years will just never look or feel the same again. all those memories from 2012 when i first got into 1D, all the concerts, all the songs and the first time hearing those songs, the first time watching music videos, the posts and memes here on tumblr... like none of it will ever feel the same. it'll always be tinged by loss and a degree of emptiness from here on out.

[fallingsunflower]

Those 5 boys and the community around them held such a strong role in shaping me and knowing one of them is just... no more... I can't explain this feeling.

[fallingsunflower]

Honestly thought I’d be like 78 years old before I’d get the news that a member of one direction died

[fallingsunflower]

:(

[fallingsunflower]

It sounds like Maya did try to help but honestly a person can only handle so much. She can't be responsible for the actions of another person

Exactly. This is not her fault but I'm sure a lot of people are already blaming her.

they were. she limited her comment section on instagram ugh

[fallingsunflower]

I'm seeing people saying his gf/ex gfs should've helped him instead of allowing him to get to this point and I'm like, what? People can't be force into looking for help. That's a decision they have to make by/for themselves. That's how it works. Nobody should make them responsibles for not "looking after him". What happened is really sad but it's not their fault.

It sounds like Maya did try to help but honestly a person can only handle so much. She can't be responsible for the actions of another person

[fallingsunflower]

I didn’t really followed the things that happened lately but I always thought that he needed help, someone should’ve put him on that way, helping him. I’m feeling so sad about all of this, all the memories from the band with him resurfaced again in my mind. I’m grieving honestly..

it's normal to grieve. It's so sad. He really did need help. He's clearly been unwell for a long time

[fallingsunflower]

I was so not in his corner but I wouldn't wish this on anyone. I truly wish he got the help he desperately needed. He just spiraled so much and I don't blame him after this week. I don't blame Maya or anyone at all, but he clearly was unable to cope /

you could see he was spiraling before the recent Maya stuff happened. we all just watched it unfold which is why it feels even more tragic for some reason. i don't know how to explain it...

It sucks because you watch it happen but there's absolutely nothing you can do

[fallingsunflower]

god it's so awful. I get that he did some awful things and he needed to be held accountable for his behavior but there was so much bullying going on online that is anyone really surprised? I just wish he had someone around him that was there to help him instead of him doing this to himself. breaks my heart.

I was so not in his corner but I wouldn't wish this on anyone. I truly wish he got the help he desperately needed. He just spiraled so much and I don't blame him after this week. I don't blame Maya or anyone at all, but he clearly was unable to cope

[fallingsunflower]

I never thought I would be one of those person to have to mourn someone they never know, never thought I would be fan of someone and have to see them leave the world that early

Liam, you had some issue lately, I didn’t agree with you on a lot of things and still don’t but you didn’t deserve to die young.

Nobody deserve to die.

I got detached from Liam a while ago, but damn this news broke my heart. I’m shaking, nearly crying.

The world stopped.

I hope his family, friends and his son will find peace.

I hope Maya is ok and won’t feel like it’s her fault because it’s not.

Liam I just wish you had the courage to get the help you need, to leave the people around you and start from 0 and not have the courage to jump from that hotel.

May you rest in peace.