#but we really want [an excuse] to talk about ourselves
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onemore2morrow · 3 days ago
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I don’t know if this makes sense and I’m probably gonna delete it eventually because Trump administration and internet tracking 🤪
I have seen so many white women on TikTok talk about the “4b” movement or “boycotting men”. I’ve also seen so many white women talking about a “loss for women everywhere” and “the devastating feeling of being a woman” and “is this what katniss felt like?”. And those feelings are valid, I’m not one to tell people how they can / can’t react during a world changing election. (I also know the katniss one is usually a joke).
But 53% of us couldn’t even band together to vote for a qualified black woman over a literal rapist. We need to swallow that. We need to address that. And that same 53% is commenting things like “He doesn’t want you anyway🤪” or “More for me!” on posts talking about things like a sex ban or 4B movement. There is no sisterhood, and there will be no “4B, 5B, 6B, or 7B” movement so long as 53% of white women continue to center men. Even out of those of us that did vote for Kamala or third party, some of us didn’t break up with our republican boyfriends/fiances/husbands until yesterday. And make no mistake, I am so proud of those of you who did finally find the courage to end that relationship. I’m not shaming you. But I am saying we cannot rely on this “sisterhood”.
There is no sisterhood in whiteness, because white supremacy and far-right ideologies are inherently based on in group fighting and othering. Make no mistake, you can find sisterhood in your white friends, women, and groups. But there’s a difference. Sisterhood and female solidarity has never been a part of whiteness. Which is why it is so important we center poc and specifically black voices during the next years ahead. Not to put labor on them, not as an excuse to not work, but because this “sisterhood” we speak of doesn’t exist. Not without acknowledging race. If we truly want to see change, we need to start decentralizing ourselves from the conversation. We need to unpack whiteness. And we need to unpack our main character syndromes.
What does this mean?
No handmaids tale cosplays.
No “we’re the daughters of the witches you couldn’t burn”.
No “I was raised by Katniss Everdeen”
Again, I am not saying that sisterhood doesn’t exist among white women. But I am saying sisterhood centered around whiteness will never be as strong or as potent as intersectional, anti-racist sisterhood. And if we really, really want to see change, we need to unpack this and we need to unpack this yesterday.
I hope this makes sense.
Sincerely,
An Embarrassed, Disappointed White Woman
p.s.
I’m not saying anything new. But unfortunately, if it’s from a fellow white woman I’m hoping more people will listen.
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Oh this explains exactly why I hated Mean Girls:
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Because jesus christ NO!!! YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE LIKE THAT o_O;;;
My family moved around a lot so I transferred schools a lot lol, often in the middle of the school year too. Thanks to that I experienced a wide variety of social dynamics. In the worst, most hierarchic and 'kill or be killed' schools, I was a weirdo outsider, sometimes with literally no friends (which was fine; I knew that wouldn't last forever, bc we were probably going to move again in a couple years). In other schools where there was much less hierarchy and performance, and much more solidarity and camaraderie, I had a lot of friends and was part of many social groups.
Is your school, workplace, family etc. shit? Well, it's not like that everywhere!
You don't have to ruin your life, sell your soul or abandon all morals trying to 'fit in' when the system is shit.
YOU CAN RESIST THE SYSTEM.
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necronomeconomicism · 7 months ago
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Ok gotta talk about it.
As a Jewish historian, I fucking hate Israel in ways most probably will never be able to comprehend. I'm going to try and explain it anyways. The central creation myth of Israel is that it is Jewish, and then consequently, that Israel is a part of Jewishness. Its easy to simply state this is false, but fully comprehending this and putting it into practice in thought and deed seems rare to me.
The evil at the heart of this violence predates the recent acceleration of genocide. Israel is a colony, and more than that, an antisemitic fraud itself. After WW2, when Israel was being founded, the Jews of Europe generally did not wave goodbye to their neighbors and head to the promised land. Many were expelled from their homes. Zionism itself, as an action, was a false choice at the time. A mere excuse to place an ally in the middle east, and an excuse to complete the expulsion and destruction of the European Jew. The Zionist Jew is more than complicit in this, they actively seek the destruction and assimilation of all other Jews.
Many fail to realize, and largely because of Israel, that Jews are not inherently white, Ashkenazi, European-descended people. Our faith and culture has an immense variety that is spread all across the globe. Jewishness, in population and volume of culture, exists more so outside of Israel than within it. Israel is for a very specific kind of Jew. The kind that lets Yiddish die, that attaches themselves to European things, that makes themselves and their practices as white as possible.
And they have the nerve, the fucking belligerent GALL, to frame themselves as the necessary saviors of our people. To the Zionist, questioning Israel is to question Jewishness itself. They bake adoration for the colonial machine into their very prayers, and push them on us even as children. To *not* oppress, to *not* kill, to *not* genocide, is to invite death. This is the core of fascistic thought, of course. "Kill them before they kill us." And they KNOW this too, they really do. The truth of that irony does not matter, because as is true for all fascists, the truth itself does not matter to them. They wanted this, they wanted this even before the British saw it in their best interest to give them the land. Any excuse to RETVRN, as the neo-nazis say of Rome, or the German Empire, or whatever the fuck stupid country they want to poorly animate the corpse of. Some select Zionists even *sided with the fucking Nazis* in agreement they should abandon Europe to colonize Palestine. (Haavara Agreement)
My people have proved time and time and time again you don't need a nation state to have an enduring culture. We have protected ourselves for thousands of years without the help of these spiteful, doom-saying maniacs. I was going to post something like this on Passover, but that would be hypocritical. The state of Israel doesn't actually have shit to do with Jewishness. Hear Israel (the state and supporters, Israel the icon) I should outlive it long enough to bury it. (old yiddish curse)
Free Palestine. Donate what you can, they need it right now.
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lesboylycan · 8 months ago
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anyways. someone should feed our npd and ask us about our plurality
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alisonwritesimagines · 3 months ago
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Second Chance ~Logan Howlett Imagine~
Summary: Logan meets you. A variant of his dead wife.
Author’s Note: I won't lie, Hugh Jackman was hotter in the early 2000s.
Part Two
Reader’s Pronouns: She/Her
Warnings: SPOILERS FOR DEADPOOL AND WOLVERINE, mentions of character deaths, mentions of sexual innuendos
Do not repost this anywhere!
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A new start for Logan was just what he needed. And thanks to the TVA, Laura was able to join him in the universe Wade was originally from. So this was a new start for the two of them. And to celebrate their success in saving the universe, Wade decided to have a pizza dinner party with all his friends so Logan and Laura can get to know them.
"We are missing one more person," Wade noticed as he looked around.
"Y/n will be coming soon. She had to deal with something first," Yukio tells him.
"Thank you, Yukio," Wade smiled at her.
"Y/n?" Logan asked Wade.
"Oh you are going to love her. Everyone does," Wade tells him. "You too Mary Puppins."
Ten minutes later, you finally showed up.
"As an apology for coming late, I made my famous brownies!" You announced as you handed the plate with the chocolate goods to Negasonic Teenage Warhead.
Logan looked over to see that the stranger who walked in felt like a walking corpse to him. His smile drained from his face as he stared at you who was greeting the people you knew.
"Y/n! I want you to meet our new friends! Logan and Laura," Wade said. It felt like a cheesy rom com slow motion turn to Logan. But he was still enchanted by your beauty.
"It's nice to meet you both," you smiled at them.
"It's nice to meet you too," Laura said as she shook your hand.
"Please excuse me," Logan said as he walked out. Your smile fell a little as you watched the man walk out. You looked back at Wade who had a confused look as well.
"I will be right back. But here. Meet Mary Puppins," Wade said as he handed the dog over to you.
Wade rushed out of the apartment to find Logan outside.
"Hey! What was that? You just ran out on one of the best people I have ever met. She is tied with Peter and Yukio," Wade tells him.
"I didn't realize you had a version of her here," Logan tells him.
"What are you talking about?" Wade asked him.
"Y/n. She was my wife in my universe," Logan explains to him.
"No shit. You were married?" Wade asked him in shock.
"She was also killed because of me."
"This one is different."
"And how's that?" Logan asked him.
"She's a really big badass here," Wade tells him.
"She was in my universe too. But I still let her and everyone down."
"This one could be different."
"I don't know."
"Why don't you come back upstairs and have pizza and get to know her?" Wade offered.
"I think I'm gonna stay out here for a bit," Logan tells him.
"Alright."
Wade headed back upstairs, leaving Logan all alone. Not fifteen minutes later, you came outside with a plate of pizza and a brownie piece and a beer.
"You are missing the pizza and my brownies which Wade was mostly eating all of them," you tell Logan as you handed the food and drink to him.
"Thanks."
"Are you okay? Did I do something?" You asked him.
"No. It's just... you look like someone and it's bringing back some memories for me," Logan tells you.
"Oh. Do you want to talk about it? If it makes you feel better, Wade has told me weirder things and more depressing things," you tell him. Logan let out a small chuckle.
"Maybe not now. I'm sorry for running out while you were introducing yourself."
"That's okay. Let's reintroduce ourselves. I'm Y/n. It's nice to meet you," you smiled at him.
"It's nice to meet you too. I'm Logan."
"Hi Logan. So, did you have to suffer with Wade alone for a couple of days too?" You asked him. Logan laughed a little.
"Yeah. I did."
"I can tell. You have a tired look on you," you laughed a little. Logan smiled softly, hearing your laugh. It was no different from his universe's you.
"You know, the party is upstairs and we are missing it," you tell him.
"That's true. Let's go," Logan said as he followed you back upstairs.
During the party, you sat next to Vanessa as you both were catching up. Logan kept looking at you whenever he could as he talked to Laura.
"You like her," Laura tells Logan loud enough for only him to hear.
"Come on kid," Logan groaned a little.
"She's pretty. And Wade talked to her about letting me stay with her and the other X-Men," Laura tells him.
"Really?"
"Yeah. Apparently she's a good teacher both education wise and powers wise," Laura tells him.
"She always was," Logan said, looking back at you. Your eyes met Logan's, making you smile at him.
"Oh he's cute. You should totally get with him when you can," Vanessa encouraged.
"You think I should?" You asked her.
"Yes! Plus he's handsome," Vanessa nudged.
"And his abs are amazing," Wade mentioned to you. You looked at Vanessa who also had the same look of interested with you.
At the end, you grabbed your bag and jacket before saying goodbye to Blind Al and Wade.
"You ready to check out the school?" You asked Laura.
"Yeah."
"Can I actually ask you something before you leave, Y/n?" Logan asked you.
"Sure. What's up?" You asked as you walked over to him.
"Would you like to go on a date with me sometime?" Logan asked you. You felt your cheeks heat up as you smiled happily.
"Yeah. I'd like that. Here's my number," you tell him as you wrote it down really quickly for him.
"Call me."
"I will."
"Alright. I'll see you soon hopefully," you tell him.
"See you soon."
"Bye, Logan," Laura waved at him before following you out.
"So, are you two just going to adopt Laura and start a family?" Wade asked him.
"Leave it."
"Just letting you know, she likes it rough in bed."
"You and her had sex?"
"Nope. But I did overhear her and Vanessa talk about what they liked in the bed one time," Wade tells him. "And trust me. She may look sweet and innocent, but she is a bit of a masochist."
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txttletale · 4 days ago
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"you, specifically, are a bad and evil person that all my posts are written to condemn" this is not what i said. i'm sorry for not being clearer. i just feel like everyone in this space, not just you, look down on people who live in the first world as people who willingly don't change anything about how the world works when it's just not that simple. i know you all love to combat this and say otherwise but it will never change the simple reality that for some people it really is very hard, if not impossible, to do anything politically, for a variety of reasons. i'm disabled, i live in a remote part of the country, and i'm bad at talking to people. i don't have the money to just move to a population center or get lessons on how to speak to people. i can't do anything and i feel like every time you or one of the other communists on tumblr talks about the imperial core, i feel like i, personally, am being held to an unreasonable standard that i would not hold anyone else to, if i were in one of your situations. obviously i want things to change. i don't want genocide to be a thing that's constantly happening, i don't want my country to have its tendrils dug into every other country, i want socialism and eventually global communism, and if i could do anything meaningful-- anything at all-- to achieve those goals i would be working on that. but right now that just is not the case for me, and i feel like i'm not alone in that either. i just wish you had like a smidgen of empathy for some of the people living here who don't fit into your stereotype of what a member of the imperial core looks like-- i'm not even trying to say that sarcastically, it genuinely feels like you all don't see us as human. like nyanguard especially seems to think of us as incapable of saving ourselves, and one of the reblogs to my first ask just said they "like to imagine that (i'm) crying as i type this". how am i supposed to react to that? is this how all of you feel about people like me? would your feelings about me change if i lived in another country, or would you find some other excuse to talk down to me? is it really just the country i live in that's the problem, here? i'm not trying to accuse you, i'm asking this question genuinely.
i know it's tempting to respond to this with a snarky comment but please just try to understand where i am coming from. i really am willing to help if i can.
i don't think any marxist seriously has a political theory of imperialism that amounts to "citizens of the imperial core simply choose not to do anything because they are all individually bad people". i mean the whole point of marxism is that economic relations are the ultimate drivers of historical change, not abstract psychological or moral qualities of people.
i'm sympathetic to your situation! the imperial core is a very atomizing place to live, and there are places and situations where there's just no practical path to getting organized and taking meaningful political action in the near future. however, your problem here is:
i feel like i, personally, am being held to an unreasonable standard that i would not hold anyone else to
nobody is posting about you, personally. like at the end of the day you have to learn to either not take posts like that personally or just block everyone who makes them to manage your own time on the computer vis a vis niceness--i don't think it's the responsibility of me or any other communist to constantly provide asterisks and carveouts that we're not talking about the Good Ones Who Have Extenuating Circumstances when we talk about the usa and its material political base.
& in the same way that you ask for empathy for your situation i would ask you to extend a level of understanding to people whose homelands and countrymen and communities have been devastated by US coups and sanctions and invasions, that they have as much a right to express the rage and fury and hurt of that cultural legacy as you do to express your own sadness about your own situation. imagine, for example, how you would feel if your grandparents could not reliably get medicine because of us sanctions. & of course the correct target for these feelings are not random usamericans--but these posts are also not serious politcal platforms, they are venting from people who live their lives under the weight of empire.
if you think what they're saying is unfair to you, then you need to develop the ability to say 'well, i understand why they would feel that way' and move on. like i understand why you are upset, and i don't say this to be dismissive, but as real advice: it is not fair (especially to bloggers from the global south) to essentially rest your happiness and self-worth at their feet and demand that they validate you.
genuinely, i hope this helps. it's all i really have to say on the matter.
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lilyprettyremy · 1 month ago
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10 Bad Habits to Let Go of for a Beautiful Life (Trust Me, You’ll Thank Yourself)
We all have those habits that hold us back — some sneakier than others. And while no one’s perfect, a little spring cleaning of your daily habits can unlock a happier, healthier life. Ready to drop the bad vibes and level up? Here are 10 bad habits to leave behind for good!
1. The Comparison Game — It’s Gotta Go
We’ve all done it. Scrolling, looking at someone’s perfect life, and feeling like we’re not enough. But honestly? Comparing yourself to others is a losing game. Focus on your own growth, and unfollow anything or anyone that makes you feel less-than. Your journey is yours alone, and it’s beautiful in its own way. Keep your eyes on your own lane!
2. Procrastinating Like It’s a Sport
We get it — that “I’ll do it tomorrow” energy feels good in the moment, but it’s also a trap. The more you put off tasks, the more they pile up and haunt you. Trust, the best feeling is getting stuff done now and freeing up your mind for the fun stuff later. Break it down, set a timer, and just start. You’ll feel like a boss when you’re done.
3. Saying Yes to Everything (Even When You Don’t Want To)
No is a full sentence, babe! If you’re constantly saying yes to things that don’t align with your goals or drain your energy, it’s time to stop. Overcommitting leads to burnout, and life’s too short for that. Start setting boundaries and prioritize what makes you feel good. Your time is precious, so treat it like gold.
4. Relying on Everyone Else’s Approval
We all love a little validation, but depending on it? That’s a recipe for insecurity. Your worth isn’t measured by someone else’s likes or approval. The only validation you really need is your own. So hype yourself up, celebrate your wins, and be proud of the progress you’re making, regardless of who’s watching.
5. Avoiding Your Finances Like It’s Scary
Finances don’t have to be terrifying! Ignoring them might feel easier in the moment, but getting a handle on your money situation is so empowering. Start small — track your spending, create a budget, and set a savings goal. The sooner you take control, the more stress-free your future will feel.
6. Holding Grudges Like They’re Trophies
Honestly, holding onto grudges only weighs you down. Letting go of past negativity isn’t about excusing people’s behavior — it’s about freeing yourself. Don’t let old situations control your peace. Forgiveness is for you, babe. The less baggage you carry, the lighter you’ll feel.
7. Talking Down to Yourself
Would you say those mean things to your best friend? Didn’t think so! So why do we let ourselves get away with it? Cut out the negative self-talk and replace it with something a little more kind and uplifting. You deserve better from yourself. You wouldn’t believe how much your mindset can change once you start being nice to yourself.
8. Expecting Everything to Be Perfect
Perfection is a myth, and chasing it will only leave you stressed and frustrated. Life happens in the in-between moments — the imperfect, messy, beautifully real ones. Give yourself some grace and celebrate progress, not perfection. A “good enough” life is often a perfect one in disguise.
9. Staying in Your Safe Bubble
Your comfort zone might feel cozy, but nothing grows there! Stepping outside of it might be scary, but it’s where all the magic happens. Whether it’s trying something new, starting a project, or meeting new people, discomfort leads to growth. Don’t let fear hold you back — take the leap!
10. Blaming Everything Else for What’s Not Going Right
It’s easy to point fingers and blame outside circumstances, but taking responsibility is where real change starts. You’ve got more control than you think! Instead of dwelling on what’s going wrong, focus on what you can change. You’ve got the power to turn things around — it’s all in your hands.
These bad habits? They’re not serving you, and it’s time to leave them in the past. Letting go of what’s holding you back will clear the way for bigger, better things. You’re already halfway there just by recognizing what needs to change. So let go, level up, and watch your life get a little more beautiful, one habit at a time.
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kaivenom · 2 months ago
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Hi! Can I request telling the One Piece Dilfs to make you pregnant? :d
Asking the One Piece Dilfs to make you pregnant HCS
Characters: Doflamingo, Mihawk, Crocodile, Smoker, Shanks
A/N: OMG this week people are going crazy with requests for these amazing men. I hope you like it
Masterlist
Dracule Mihawk
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He got really turned on.
He put his weight on you, his chest on your back and his thrusts starting to become painfully slower.
His hot breath now on your neck, bitting and kissing.
"So you want my seed? you want to bear my lineage," you nodded, suddently embarrased of your words, "i would like to do that with you, filling you up and seeing your round belly."
He continued with that filthy speech impulsed by his recently discovered breeding kink.
Every thrust being more powerful and intoxicating than the last one, until he came inside you, a lot.
He rolled over and put you onto his chest.
"I don't know how good i will be with children but since i had Zoro and Perona around here two years, i think i have a little experience. Prepare yourself, this night you will end up pregnant."
You were so flustered and turned on that you couldn't answer, but you know tomorrow you won't be able to walk.
Donquixote Doflamingo
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The perfect excuse to be more rough with you.
He simply didn't really care about the thing of making you pregnant, he was just turned on about being able to cum inside you over and over.
That night was really exhausting for you.
"Ohh, my little slut wants to be a mother? then you should be able to take it, if you can't take my dick how would you take my child?"
When he finally stoped getting his multiple times with you, you passed out of exhaustion.
You didn't notice how he got up and went to the window with a bottle of alcochol.
"Stupid woman, how would you want my child... i can't deny anything to you, even that. It would be bad like me or good like Corazon." he spent the rest of the night thinking about every posible future for the child and for you two, "at least i can try to be funny and get them whatever they could think of... better leave the education to her."
Sr. Crocodile
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"You have everything you want from me, my money my house, my love and know my child? you are a very vicious one, my woman."
His thrusts were deep and rythmical, with all the conversation he didn't stopped or changed his way with you.
"How would think of people if they saw you have my child? I am a criminal, a very wanted one, i am dangerous. How could someone like you think it's a good idea to have a family with me? How could you think i want you to have it with me?"
That last phrase was really cruel and you made him stop, flipping yourself and force him to look at you in the face, to see how angry you are.
"I am dating you, idiot, i love you stupid Crocodile... it is that strange that after a couple of years of dating i want a family?" you wanted to slap him but he stopped you with a strange face.
"It's not strange, in fact i thought about that too but think, i am a wanted man with a really dangerous environment, do you really want to expose yourself like that? and a child?"
"I am already exposed, there is no going back, just continue and take the next step. We know how to take care of ourselves, right?"
"Yes, youre right... and sorry for talking rude to you."
Smoker
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It awaken something on him.
It was in the middle of the act and you say it in the heat of the moment but that froze him.
Suddently you are turn over and you are facing him again, his eyes full of insecurity and awkardness.
"Do you really want it?" you blinked a couple of times, all the hornyness going away, this is serious "I have a stable job, we've been together for a long time and well... maybe it's not so bad the idea of being parents."
Yo nodded with a sincere smile while stroking his cheek slightly.
"I would love to be a parent with you."
Then he started again with his thrusts, this time more tender and full of love.
Akagami Shanks
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You were riding him and he put his hands on your thights, stopping you from moving.
"I don't oppose to the idea of filling you up until you can´t take it anymore but do you really think we are capable of raising a child on a pirate ship?" his face was halfway into laughing but you know he is being dead serious.
"I think yes, you were raised on a pirate ship and you ended up well."
He couldn't deny that, you were absolutely right.
"If we think of doing this, you won't get out of the ship while pregnant or you will be accompained everywhere and when you give birth you will take care of the child while i..."
You pinched his cheek frustated.
"This would be OUR child, i get it will i am pregnant but after that we take turns, i won't be in lock down like the child is a virus."
You didn't stopped pinching his cheek until he agreeded with you.
"I love you and we will take care of she."
"She? You already put a gender?"
"Then i will have my queen and a princess... if we have two? a prince and a princess?"
"Step by step."
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minarisplaything · 11 months ago
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Going Away Present ft. Jennie Kim
pairing: Blackpink Jennie Kim x M!Reader/M!OC rating: Explicit wordcount: 3.8k summary: Being the younger sibling of a member of Blackpink meant you were constantly surrounded by temptation. When the time for you to go away to college is coming up, one member decides to give you a special gift. disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. all characters portrayed are 18+
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 It was just another day when you were walking up the front steps of your parents' house, grocery bags in hand. You couldn't help but wonder why you had been sent to get something so simple. Then again, Jisoo was in town, which meant your parents probably wanted to have some private time to catch up with her. Needless to say, being the member of a popular South Korean girl band and global ambassador for multiple brands required a lot of time away from home.
Pushing the front door open with your foot, you stumbled through the doorway, trying to see past the brown bags in your arms, “A little help—?"
"SURPRISE!!!"
A loud roar interrupted you as you stepped a foot into the house. You don't know what your reaction looked like, but judging from your slack jaw, it had to be some mixture of fear and bewilderment.
"W-What's going on?" you stammered, the bags practically falling out of your hands.
"We planned a surprise going-away party!" your mum explained as she walked towards you.
The smile on her face showed that she was clearly proud to have accomplished her goal. Your shocked expression slowly settled into a small smile and look of appreciation. Leave it to her to go above and beyond with something like this.
“Mum, I don’t leave for university for another month,” you said, handing the bags over to her.
“Yes, well, your sister is only here for two weeks then she has to leave on the international tour. So we decided to do it now. Go on, enjoy yourself, sweetie."
Your smile faltered somewhat. Ah, that explained it better. You would be lying if you said you weren't looking forward to going to university to make a fresh start for yourself out of your sister's shadow. You looked around the room, briefly noting the guests. It was the usual crowd; relatives, some schoolmates, longtime neighbors, and sure enough, your sister, Jisoo, and the other members of Blackpink.
You bit the bottom of your lip as you looked at them. Damn, Jennie, Chaeyoung, and Lisa looked amazing. No, you chastised yourself, Keep it together. Pushing your inappropriate thoughts aside, you turned back to the crowd of gathered people.
"Uh, thanks a lot for coming, guys. I’m sure there's plenty of food and drink, so let's enjoy ourselves."
Luckily, you were spared standing in an awkward silence as someone took the cue to start the music, and the party began. Now you say party, but that was being a bit generous. In reality, you spent most of the afternoon going around to various groups of people, talking and thanking them for coming. The questions were mostly the same: What university will you be going to? What will you be majoring in? How far is it? Have you thought about life after university and so on. It was exhausting, really.
Eventually, you worked your way to the backyard where the members of Blackpink stood gathered. Oddly enough, you had known them almost better than you knew anyone else at the party. In that sense, you couldn't help but be relieved when you finally made it to them.
"He's so grown up!" Chaeyoung squealed as you walked over. "I remember when he was eye level with me."
An embarrassed grin crossed your features as you stopped in front of them. Seeing them so often going through teenage years was never easy and often led to you excusing yourself to your room. At least now you could control yourself...mostly. Chaeyoung, or Rosie, was right though. Where you had once been eye-level and even shorter than her, you now towered over her.
“Ah, I never thought I’d see this day,” Jisoo said dramatically, moving over and wrapping an arm around you. “I was sure he’d drop out of school or something before university.”
The girls laughed as you shrugged her off, “Don't let mom and dad hear you saying that,” you teased looking over at her. "Besides, we all know I'm the brains in the family."
“Does that make me the talented one?”
The others laughed at the display of sibling bantering, and you couldn't help but join in. At moments like this, it was easy to forget just how famous she actually was.
Wearing a slight grin of her own, Jennie Kim moved towards you, wrapping an arm around your neck and standing to the side, “Be nice, Jisoo-unnie, it’s a special day for him,” she said before leaning up to give you a kiss on the cheek. You could immediately feel your face start to redden and hoped the fading sunlight in the yard was enough to mask it. “Plus we have a special way to send you off later.”
You raised your eyebrows curiously. Jennie had always been your favorite among your sister’s friends, something you were sure they secretly knew but didn’t want to embarrass you by pointing out. The idea of a special send-off from her had already sent your mind down an optimistic path. Something Jennie seemed to pick up on as her grin grew.
“Get your mind out of the gutter! It's just a nice club downtown. Especially since you’re old enough to drink now.”
Not exactly the special gift your dirty mind had hoped for but you'd take it. Besides, there were people around the country who would kill to be in your position right now.
“Sounds perfect. This is a nice party and all but there's only so much excitement a going-away party thrown by your parents can have.”
“Don't worry, you’ll have plenty of excitement later,” Jennie winked at you, causing Jisoo to hit her playfully.
“Yah! Stop giving my baby brother the wrong idea!” Jisoo protested.
“Who said it's the wrong idea," Lisa chimed in, a mischievous look on her face, "We might find him a nice girl for the night."
"I'm not listening to this," your sister comically stuck her fingers in her ear.
A round of laughter broke out as Jisoo comically covered her ears. Undeterred, you looked around the yard before returning to the girls, "So when are you guys taking me out for this magical night?”
“Be ready by eleven. Lines aren't exactly an issue for us,” Jennie spoke up first.
You nodded, of course. Benefits of being famous and all.
“Sounds good. You’ll see us all then.”
You hesitated for a moment before leaning down to place a quick peck on Jennie's cheek. This, of course, caused teasing ‘oohs’ and ‘awws’ from the group. You walked away without looking back, but over your shoulder, you could hear Lisa talking as her gaze stared you down.
“He hasn’t even gone off on his own yet, and he’s making man moves.”
The rest of the party went as it had before your run-in with your sister and friends, which was to say boring and dull. Not that it was any fault of their own. It was hard to focus on casual conversation when your mind was already thinking ahead to going out to a club with Jennie, Chaeyoung, and Lisa. And Jisoo as well, you supposed. Eventually, your parents were seeing everyone out, and you were able to slip away to get prepared for the night. Despite not being active in the nightlife scene, you felt compelled to look your best tonight.
It turned out Jennie hadn't been lying. After picking you up, you took a taxi to some club in the heart of the nightlife district. Even with yourself looking terribly out of place, you walked right in and were guided to a table in the VIP section. It was surreal, really. And while you recognized that for many, simply a night at the club with Blackpink would be a dream, your mind couldn't help but wander back to Jennie's words and hope for more.
After a few shots and celebratory toasts, the party was well and truly underway. You could feel yourself starting to loosen up, and whatever nerves you might've had beforehand began to fade away. Time seemed to flow at its own pace, and you were a passenger to its whims.
“I still can’t believe you guys just get VIP tables like this,” you leaned over to say to Jennie, who sat to your right.
“It’s one of the perks of the job,” she replied with a smile before sipping her current drink. “Do you want another?” she pointed to the bottle; you shrugged and held your glass out.
“Jennie! I’m going to go use the bathroom, Chaeyoung is coming with me,” Jisoo shouted over to you.
Her bandmate gave an affirmative response, leaving you alone with Jennie and Lisa. Your thoughts began to wander once again, but before you could work up the courage to act on any of them, you heard a voice calling out to you.
"Do you dance?" 
It was Lisa, leaning over the couch towards Jennie and you. 
Feeling your nerves suddenly come back, you stammered, “Well uh, not too often I can’t really say—"
Jennie's laughter filled your ear, "Just come on!" 
She placed her drink down and took one of your hands while Lisa grinned and took the other. Together they guided you from your booth to an area to dance. Which, while not as crowded as the main floor, was still packed. Jennie easily found you a nook to slide into. She turned around, looking up at you as she pressed her body close to yours and began moving to the electronic beat without a moment's hesitation. Similarly, you could feel Lisa pressing against you from behind, sandwiching you between the two women.
If this was your gift, you could die a happy person.
"Take a deep breath," Jennie says soothingly, her hands rising above her head as she moves effortlessly to the music. Was is that obvious? You try to follow suit, but your body remains rigid despite your best efforts to loosen up. She turns towards you, pressing her backside against your crotch, and you feel waves of pleasure course through your veins.
Without warning, she takes your hands and places them on her hips, leaving them there as if daring you to move them. As you stand frozen in shock, wondering if this is an invitation or not, Lisa wraps her arms around you from behind. Her fingers trace intricate patterns against your skin as she moves to the music.
"Oh fuck..." you muttered, hoping the music masked your comment from their ears.
The singer continued her moves, even going as far to ratchet it up as she slid down using your body as if it were a stripper pole. As a result it also caused your hands to move from her hips to where her breasts were. Unable to help yourself your fingers flexed, feeling the mounds concealed by her tight top.  As if spurred on by your actions her ass rotated, rubbing directly into your crotch over and over again. 
“Noona...Jennie...” you tried to warn but your words were lost in the stereo music as she continued to dance.
You could feel yourself beginning to grow hard but could do nothing to stop her as she moved to the song. Every now and then her arms would wrap around my neck, pulling you down ever so closely only to release you and resume grinding against you in various ways. To add on to that you could feel Lisa's body pressed firmly against mine from behind. Whether either girl sensed or felt what was stirring they didn't let it stop them.
“Ssh, enjoy yourself,” Jennie cooed over the music. 
And you were. Very much so in fact. 
After all, who wouldn’t be in this position? Jennie Kim was rubbing her fit ass against your crotch as she danced to the music to the point where it felt like she was giving you a private lap dance. Meanwhile, Lisa was letting her hands roam over your body as if she was worshiping your form. No one in their right mind would want this to end. 
It was only when Lisa moved from around you and began to dance with Jennie in front of you that you finally felt like you were in danger of doing something embarrassing. As intoxicating as the sight was, it wasn’t worth ejaculating inside your pants in front of them. Mustering what willpower you had, you forced yourself to take a step back, whispering a brief excuse. 
“Sorry, ladies, I need to take care of something.”
Before they could turn around to question you on the matter, you made my way through the crowd and made a beeline for the restroom; oblivious to the knowing looks and devilish smiles that the two women exchanged. 
“Fucking hell,” you grunted as you stumbled into a bathroom stall.
You braced yourself against the sides, taking deep breaths as you tried to compose yourself. Which was easier said than done when your cock was painfully hard. As tempting as it was to jerk off and relieve yourself, there was no way you were doing that in a public stall. That seemed like you’d be asking for some kind of infection.
No, no. You just need to take a few minutes, regain your composure, and then you’d go out there and pick up where you left off.
“They were just teasing me. No way that was serious…” you muttered to yourself. “But still…”
What if they weren’t just teasing? What if this was your chance to make a move? If their dance moves were any indication they were feeling it just as much as you were. And it was your birthday after all. Stranger things had happened before, right? Probably. 
Thinking about your plan, of the potential of success, didn’t exactly help quell your excitement but at least you weren’t sporting an aching bulge ready to tear through your pants. You left the stall, went to the sink and splashed some water on your face. With a look in the mirror you set your determination and made your way back to the dance floor.
When you didn’t spot the girls you made your way back to the VIP area where you saw Jennie sipping on her drink and looking at her phone.
“Hey,” you called out.
“There you are,” her eyes lit up as she looked up at you. 
“Decided to take a break?”
“Something like that.”
“What happened to Lisa? The others?” you asked.
Jennie leaned back, crossing one leg over the other. The tight dress she wore rode up her thighs, giving you a delicious sight, “Oh, she had something to take care of. I think your sister and Rosie are off dancing the night away.”
You swallowed the lump in your throat, trying to remember your prior pep talk, “I guess it’s just the two of us.”
Jennie, meanwhile, wasn’t lacking confidence at all. She practically oozed it as she leaned forward, resting her elbow on one of her knees and placing her chin in her hand. She looked as though she could devour you with a single word and honestly, you would let her. 
“It seems that way,” she cooed, “I was actually thinking of getting out of here…” 
Your eyes went wide but you hoped you continued your composure otherwise, “Yeah?” 
“Yeah,” Jennie raised her hand to her mouth in what you guessed was a faux yawn, “I’m feeling exhausted. I guess I can’t party the same way I used to.”
This was it. Your chance.
“I can take you home if you want.”
A wicked grin crossed her features. 
“Jisoo always said you were well-mannered. I’ll text the girls and tell them we’re heading out.”
LATER THAT NIGHT…
Your back crashed against Jennie’s door and her lips were immediately on yours.
From the moment you had entered the cab to get back to her place it had felt like a fever dream. Her hand had teasingly run along your thigh the whole ride and at one point her lips had found their way to your neck.
Once you had arrived and stumbled into her apartment, she was all over you. No more suggestive touches with hidden meanings, no more coy flirtations. Her lips were on yours while her hands grabbed at your body. It was exhilarating and overwhelming all at once. Despite not drinking more than that initial shot, your head was spinning. This was happening. It was somewhat fortunate that you didn’t have time to overthink it at all.
Jennie’s hands gripped at your shirt, quickly undoing the buttons and pushing it over your shoulders. Next her hands moved to your belt buckle, her teeth biting at your bottom lip as she looked up at you with a sex-crazed gaze.
“I didn’t give you a gift at your party did I?” she asked.
“I-I don’t think so,” you moaned, feeling her hand slip into your pants to grip your cock.
“Then consider my pussy your graduation gift,” Jennie said, “Or a going away present. Whichever you want to call it.”
Her words made your head spin to the point all you could do was nod dumbly. Jennie had a wicked smile on her features as she reached down, pulling your pants and boxers away to expose your aching erection. An erection that you’d been dealing with practically since the club.
“I was wondering what it looked like,” Jennie cooed. “You know, Lisa and I were taking bets on just how big it was.”
“You were?” the thought caused your cock to jump in excitement.
“Mhmm.” Jennie bit her bottom lip as she reached down, her fingers curling around your shaft. “She’s going to be jealous that I got to you first you know. You’d split her in half with this.”
The combination of Jennie stroking your cock and the image of plowing into Lisa was enough to make you more than ready to receive your gift. Something Jennie must have realized as well as you heard her let out a giggle. She rose to her feet and turned, briefly giving you a view of her ass in the tight dress that hugged her fit body.
The view became even greater when she bent over, reached under her dress and slowly pulled her panties down her thighs. She looked over her shoulder, watching your face as she stepped out of them. Briefly you wondered what it’d be to get a lap dance from her. An idea to hope for in the future maybe.
“You can take these with you when you leave,” Jennie winked.
She placed the panties on top of the desk before looking back at you. She hitched up her red dress, revealing her bare ass and exposed pussy to you. If it weren’t for the fact that all the blood had already left your head and gone to your cock, you might’ve fainted on the spot.
“Fuck…”
“Come on then. Come enjoy your gift,” she said. She wiggled her ass as she invited you to close the distance in the hallway and take her.
“Do I need a condom?” you fumbled.
Jennie laughed and shook her head, her hair sticking loosely to her already sweat-covered body, “Don’t worry about that.”
She didn’t have to say it twice. The thought left your mind and you closed the distance between her and yourself. One hand took hold of your cock, lining herself up at her dripping entrance. You paused for a beat, etching the visual into your memory banks as you finally slipped inside of her. To say you had fantasized about your sister's bandmates before would be an understatement. In that sense, this was a dream come true. But even those dreams couldn't compare to the real feeling of Jennie's tight walls squeezing around your cock.
"Fuck, that's it, baby," Jennie moaned, bracing herself with one hand against the wall.
Slowly you buried inch after inch inside of the pop star until your hips were flush against Jennie's ass. As much as you wanted to savor the moment, the desire to fuck your long-time crush was far more overwhelming. Jennie was clearly ready for you to start given the way she ground her ass against you, imploring you to start thrusting immediately. You obliged her, slipping your cock out before filling her to the hilt once again and again.
"Fucking hell," you grunted.
"That's it. Fuck me, Baby" Jennie urged, moans falling from her plump lips.
As you gained a rhythm she began to meet your thrusts with her own movements. Your hands moved to her waist, squeezing gripping her tight as you fucked her. It was hard enough to make sure that there would be marks there tomorrow morning but not enough to cause any discomfort. In fact, judging from the moans of encouragement Jennie let out, she didn't seem to have any complaints.
"Harder," she gasped.
"Yes ma'am."
Every time you entered her from behind it  resulted in her perfect ass smacking against you, filling the room with the sound of skin slapping against each other. Jennie clawed against the wall as you pistoned your cock inside of her faster and faster, drawing out both of your pleasure. And it was good. Incredible even. Each thrust inside of Jennie was better than the last, far better than anything your imagination could have come up with. 
It was safe to say that the continued feeling of her pussy tightening around your cock far surpassed late nights with your own hand. The only problem was that you knew that it wouldn't last forever. That sooner rather than later you'd be emptying your balls inside of Jennie Kim. Or maybe she'd let you finish on her face.
"Fuck!" you gasped, cock twitching at the thought.
"Does it feel good, baby?" Jennie cast a glance over her shoulder. Her dark hair was sticking to her forehead, her cheeks flushed red, "You don't have to hold back for me. Let yourself go."
"Jennie-- " you warned, desperately.
All you could focus on was the feeling of Jennie's pussy, the desire to fuck her harder, and the looming inevitable release that was growing closer and closer with each thrust.
"I'm--Fuck. I'm going to--" you gasped.
You didn't have time to finish your sentence as Jennie slipped free of your grasp. Before you knew it she was on her knees in front of you, her mouth open and tongue sticking out as she stroked your cock furiously. One look at that sight and it was well and truly over. Your balls tightened, your pent up release spewing all over the pop idol's face. Your cock twitched in her grasp, ropes of your seed splattering her features. You had seen Jennie a lot over the years, but you had never witnessed her like this.
"Jesus christ..."
When it was all said and done you were exhausted and utterly spent. As your cock finally began to soften, Jennie ran a manicured finger over her face, scooping up a wad of your cum and sucking it clean off her fingers. When she looked up at you she seemed as satisfied as you felt.
"Congratulations again on graduating," Jennie said, a wicked smile on his lips. "I can't wait to see you when you come back for break."
BUY ME A COFFEE - if you enjoy my stories considering buying me a coffee! always appreciated, never required.
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freshlove-sturn · 4 months ago
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texts w bsf!chris
<- previous, part 6, next ->
continuation of part 5!!
nick goes to open the back drivers side door of the car, before chris quickly places his hand over the door handle.
“you can sit in front again, i wanna sit with y/n.” chris suggests, trying to sound casual but the hint of desperation in his voice is apparent to all of us.
nick raises an eyebrow, “you’re actually ridiculous chris” he shakes his head before walking around to the other side and sitting up front.
i smile almost teasingly at chris, a pink tinge becoming present on his cheeks.
“you want aux?” chris asks.
“no, i’m okay with whatever yall want to play.” i tell him.
“you sure?” he asks again, just to be sure.
“chris this is literally like suffocating.” matt pipes up, peering back at us through the rear view mirror.
“i’m just making sure.” chris defends.
chris and i have always had a flirty friendship, but lately i’ve noticed a new intensity to it all. it’s like every time i turn around he’s there, primed and ready with a new excuse to be close to me. it seems like the entire dynamic of our friendship was changing right in front of me.
but i wouldn’t call it a bad change.
while he used to casually brush his hand against mine, or throw out a teasing, flirty comment here and there, he now finds every excuse to touch me- whether that be his knee pressed against mine whenever we sit next to eachother, much like right now as he sits beside me, occasionally stealing glances at me, or moving past me with his hand pressed against the small of my back.
he takes any chance he can get to compliment me, telling me how pretty i am, that i’m smart, talented, even things as random as he likes the way i look in green.
and then of course, the way he looks at me.
he has a longing eyes that weren’t there in boston, like he’s trying to tell me something without words.
i’d be lying if i said i didn’t love every part of it.
we pull up to the restaurant and matt throws the car in park. chris opens the door for me, of course, extending out his hand for me to take in assistance.
“i can’t remember if i told you already, but you look really nice y/n.” matt remarks, a warm smile playing on his lips.
“thanks.” i smile, accepting the compliment.
i glance over at chris, his jaw slightly clenches at the compliment. i brush my fingers against his to ease the tension.
once we enter the restaurant, the host escorts us to our seats. chris’s hand planted on the small of my back, guiding me.
we get sat in a booth and chris slides in next to me. his legs brushes against mine under the table, sending a jolt of electricity up my spine. the soft hue of the overhead lights casting a warm hue on chris’s features, illuminating them perfectly.
chris’s arm drapes casually on the back of the booth, his fingers grazing my shoulder gently. it’s a small gesture, but it feels so intimate, almost as if he’s taking a silent claim over me. i try focusing on the menu, but it’s almost impossible with him this close.
“what’re you thinking about getting?” chris leans down to speak to me, his breath warm against my ear with the close proximity.
“i actually don’t know. this is the biggest menu ive ever seen in my life.” i laugh, glancing around at the endless options.
“i recommend the alfredo, just sayin” he suggests with a casual shrug.
“you always recommend alfredo.” i roll my eyes playfully.
“and it’s always the best thing.” chris defends.
“actually, it doesn’t sound half bad.” i admit.
“see? what did i tell you?” he says confidently. earning another eye roll from me.
a little while after we take our order, our food arrives.
as we eat and talk casually amongst ourselves, matt interrupts the conversation.
“oh y/n, you kinda got something right there.” he gestures to the corner of my mouth. “here i got it.” he leans over the table with a napkin, gently wiping the sauce from my face.
“oh thank you.” i murmur, feeling slightly flustered from the interaction, but i shake it off when i notice chris’s sudden change in demeanor. he goes quiet for the first time tonight, i give his hand a gentle squeeze under the table.
was he jealous of matt?
surely not. why would he be? matt is his brother, and im his best friend.
his friend.
and that was it.
after dinner, the drive home was painfully quiet. you could cut the tension in the air with a knife.
now chris and i sit silently in his bed. i excuse myself to go take a shower, in hopes that maybe he would get over whatever had his so pissed off by the time i was done.
“i’m gonna go shower.” i stand up, grabbing a pair of pajamas out of my suitcase.
“k.” chris replies coldly.
i stop myself from saying anything, i didn’t want to argue with him.
i walk back into chris’s room, and sit back in his bed. chris had turned on netflix, and was watching love island.
“watcha watching?” i ask, desperate to break the silence.
“what’s it look like?” he responds sarcastically.
i was done holding my tongue, “chris what is your problem? why are you so mad?” i ask, my patience finally snapping.
“maybe next time you want to gawk over my brother, don’t do it in front of me.” he snaps back.
“are you serious?” i scoff. “that’s what this is about? matt wiping sauce off my face?”
“you’re fully capable of doing it yourself, no?” chris retorts.
“you’re acting as if i asked him to do that, he was just being nice.” i defend, my voice tinged with frustration.
as i sit there, facing chris, a whirlwind of thoughts race through my mind. i can’t believe we were arguing about something as trivial as matt wiping sauce off my face. it seemed so insignificant, yet chris was clearly upset. i can’t help but feel a mix of frustration and confusion. why is he making such a big deal out of this? does he seriously think i have any control over matt's actions?
deep down, i wonder if theres more to chris's reaction. is he really that jealous? the idea of that seems almost absurd, but there’s no denying the intensity in his eyes. i try to push the thought away, focusing instead on defending myself. i hadn't done anything wrong. matt was just being nice, and it felt unfair to be blamed for something so innocent.
yet, despite my in doubtable irritation, a small part of me couldn't help but feel a flicker of hope. if chris actually is jealous, does that mean he cares more than he lets on? was the flirty behavior more than just chris being typical chris? the thought is both thrilling and terrifying. i don’t want to read too much into it, but the possibility lingered in the back of my mind, adding another layer of complexity to our already tangled relationship.
chris’s expression softens when he sees the frustration in my eyes. he sighs, running his hand through his hair.
“i’m sorry.” he says quietly. “i overreacted. it’s just, shit, i don’t know. maybe i’m just jealous.” he admits.
“chris you don’t have to be jealous.” i tell him.
he looks at me, eyes full of sincerity. “yeah i know, i just care about you, a lot and sometimes it just gets the best of me.”
a small smile tugs on my lips. “i care about you too chris. more than you know.”
“but, can you just promise me you’ll talk to me when things bother you before you go an be a dick about it?” i tease, extending my pinky out to him.
“i promise.” he laughs, interlocking his pinky with mine.
a/n: sorry i didn’t know how to really end this LMAO. i don’t really know how to feel about this part tbh. PLEASE lmk your thoughts/ what you would like to see in future parts. my requests are ALWAYS open and highly appreciated and encouraged.
taglist: @conspiracy-ash @pouring-rains @aniesvision @sturniolo-fann @mattttypooh @sarosfilms @oliviasturniolo21 @le4hsblog @stonermattsgf @fratbrochrisgf @sassysturniolo2008 @creamoncreamoncream2 @st7rnioioss @chrizzysturns @lisask8s @mattnchrisworld @sturnioloblues @spencerstits @chrisstopherfilmed @sturnzsun
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thebirdsandthebats · 1 year ago
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Okay @s-p-r-i-n-g-t-i-m-e I’m sure you know plenty BUT I’m going to use your wonderful and hilarious comment on this as an excuse to talk about Bernard, bc I realized recently that there are plenty of ppl who haven’t read most of the comics he’s been in. So get ready for my long overdue:
UNPACKING BERNARD DOWD + HIS TRAUMA (for those who cannot keep up with comics but want to get to know him)
So to start, Tim met Bernard years ago ofc, when they were in high school. It’s established pretty quick that Bernard is an extremely Unserious guy LMAO, the first thing he does is literally circle Tim and try to feel him out socially, see what kind of guy he is. He’s the kind of guy who gets himself in trouble with his big mouth, and seems to enjoy poking at Tim and testing his patience. By the time we meet Bernard again in the recent years, he’s grown a lot, but at his core he’s still the light-hearted, fun, goofy guy with very strong opinions. Just less stand-offish, maybe
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Throughout the time Tim spends at this school though, Bernard does experience some wild shit. He lost Darla (somebody he really cared about), he experienced a shooting at his school, and then Darla came back from the dead, kind of scared the hell out of him, and used him to contact Tim again. It was kind of played for laughs, but like. That’s gotta fuck you up. (Robin #140)
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Obviously this is the kind of thing that maybeee has a lasting effect on you. And BECAUSE Tim Drake: Robin got cut so short and the writer had to rush to wrap up the series, we’re left to fill in a lot of gaps and draw conclusions about the years we didn’t see Bernard ourselves. But we absolutely get some insight as to his life after Tim left that school and we stopped seeing him in the comics. Spoiler alert: it was hard.
In TDR, Bernard discusses the the cult that he’d been in that Tim saved him from in Urban Legends. He says that “he’d accepted himself”, but others hadn’t. Obviously there’s the natural reading that he means his queerness (which has me chewing through drywall), but I think that he’s speaking very broadly too. Bernard is a very odd example of a civilian, because he’s always getting dragged into things much bigger than him. And even before that, he had his big ideas, his conspiracies, his loud personality. He tended to rub people the wrong way in high school. Then in issue #7 of TDR (the Bernard pov issue my most beloved, weird pacing aside) Bernard refers to this “oozy, sticky feeling” that he ALWAYS feels when Tim isn’t around. He says when he’s alone it’s harder to put one foot in front of the other. To keep GOING. To wake up every day.
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I think that Bernard has always felt like an outcast. (Robin #121, he doesn’t fit into any clique). He wasn’t as okay with it as he acted. And I think he wasn’t getting any attention from his parents. (Batman: Urban Legends #5, Bernard’s parents nonchalance to the days leading up to his kidnapping)
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So just like Bernard explained to Tim, that feeling got bad. and he wanted to let go. The chaos monsters, the cult, all of it was a means to an end. But then Tim agreed to see him again, and I think that sparked something in him. Because he started learning to fight. When he was tied down to that alter and Tim was saving him, I think it fully sank in to Bernard that he didn’t want to die. Reconnecting with Tim gave him hope and made him really feel something good for the first time in ages.
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So now that they’re dating after the cult fiasco, we get to know this current Bernard. A less goading, maybe calmer Bernard. But he’s still himself, of course, rambling about his ideas and making bad jokes and sticking to his guns (he has NEVER been a pushover, no idea where people get that idea?). I think a lot of people complained that Bernard mellowed out too much in terms of attitude, but I think if he seems “nicer” it’s because 1) he’s grown now. It’s been a while since we last saw him, and he’s clearly changed a lot. And 2) because he’s dating Tim now. He likes him a lot, and he’s an affectionate partner. He wants to lift Tim up.
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But the fact that he was pulled into a cult still remains. And as lighthearted as Bernard tries to be, that traumatic experience still happened. It said in Urban Legends #5 while Tim was searching for him that Bernard had welts on his arms and legs and had been acting different, so it’s not like he was just snatched up on a whim. He’d spent significant time there. For those who haven’t read much abt the ways cult trauma specifically can fuck you up, I recommend doing a search if you’re in a good headspace for that and want to understand him more. because it’s pretty bad.
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And then! yeah. you guessed it. Bernard gets kidnapped again. Chained up next to a BOMB that’s counting down. RIGHT WHEN HE’S WORKING ON HEALING FROM ALMOST BEING SACRIFICED BY A CULT.
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And surely this can’t get crazier. He’s almost died twice in the past 6 months. except, remember his parents? In TD:R #7, we really see a little more of his relationship with his parents. He doesn’t live up to their standards, and his dad specifically seems to just want to argue with him. The restaurant they’re at is attacked, and everything goes to shit, and. you know, I think these panels really speak for themselves.
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And for the record, when it’s revealed that everyone is seeing their worst fears, Bernard’s parents fears are not about him.
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So now Bernard has to deal with that. And we start to see that Bernard is really not as okay as he’s tried to be. He keeps a baseball bat by his door because he’s been kidnapped twice now. And just when he’d likely thought things couldn’t get worse, he heard the Chaos Monsters were back. I can’t imagine he feels safe. He lashes out for the first time since all this has happened and yells at Kate and Tim, because while they’re doing what they feel is necessary to save more people (AND I DONT BLAME THEM AT ALL), Bernard can’t talk about it.
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And I will forever be sad and insist that TD:R got cancelled too soon, just before we could get into the really juicy stuff, because things had to be wrapped up pretty quick and this was the only comic Bernard was consistently appearing in. But when Tim is giving himself up to the chaos monsters, Bernard goes out and rallies anyone he knows can help. Things were rushed because there was no more time to flesh out the story the way it could have been, but I’m including these panels just because I love Bernard Audacity Dowd using a fucking flashlight and shadow puppet to call Batman. geeking out for a minute. And then leading the battalion to save Tim with a SLEDGEHAMMER. gay people rule.
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So yeah! While I see the vision of how a lot of Bernard’s trauma was meant to be semi-resolved and let him come to peace after saving Tim back, we just didn’t have the time for him to heal properly. I’d give anything to get inside his brain again. UHH IF YOU READ THIS I HOPE YOU LOVE BERNARD NOW and don’t come at me if I left something out, some of my comics aren’t with me rn. Bonus TimBer for the road:
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zan0tix · 8 months ago
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Hi tumblr user Zan0tix, I have to say that I love that you draw Jake as big and hairy AND fem. It's such a rare combination outside of mean-spirited caricatures, every time I see your Jake I get a big smile on my face. :)
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Hi tumblr user HermitCyclop ^u^ here is a jake drawing for you 🫶
The transmisogynistic demonisation of these features is so maddening!!! I agree! Im glad that the intent (appreciating these features) of my jake design reaches you c:
GOING TO PUT IT UNDER THE CUT BECAUSE I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY. But jake english gender meta because i think about it Too Much and am taking this as an excuse to infodump abt it. 😁
The alpha kids and their specific defiance of both homestucks gendered narrative AND real life societal expectations are so fun to think about to me!! but since we are talking about jake, his specific defiance of both homestucks models of masculinity and femininity in the context of his queerness is like the reason he is my fav character.
He props himself up that he wants to be the adventure "hero" in the homestuck sense (the hardheaded blue femme fatale) and the western media sense (the hardheaded action man) yet whenever pressed to actually act on what he says he always refuses or obfuscates. Because really what he wants is to just be himself! I really love the alpha kids because they all just want to be Themselves, not be restricted and defined by what is expected of them, (all the characters have this but the alphas particularly really hammer this home for me)
The heavy emphasis on their beta selves, the heteronormative archetypes they embodied and what went wrong in their lives that manifest as fears in their alpha selves... im always thinking about it. How differently society affects queer ppls choices in life and then the fact that they all get a second chance and getting to watch them live out that second chance and realize their queerness and them all caring so much abt eachother and wanting to aspire to be better FOR the ones they love!!!!!! it always tugs at my heart strings to ponder😢😢
IM SO GOOD AT GOING ON TANGENTS MY BAD but basically. The alpha kids explicit queerness and how despite the comic itself protesting, they are all shown to be deserving of love (of all kinds) And as a person who super heavily relates to jake, his experience with his own identity (and dirks unending adoration and love for him and likewise jakes belief and admiration of dirk) serves to me as a reminder that yknow! We are all worthy of love!! Even if we dont think ourselves to be (this is just the message of shrek.) and there is always hope to be found in things improving!!!!
But in a text thats explicitly queer and not shy about letting its queer characters do wrong in realistic ways i think this message is incredibly powerful and certainly one of the best things about the comic in my eyes. And i love embracing that in my art of the characters! Drawing queer (but here specifically trans) characters all getting to be proud of themselves and their appearances makes me feel proud of myself alongside them and I think its wonderful to be able appreciate other trans peoples experiences and looks through it too!!
I specifically in homestuck fandom dont really see anybody but twinks (usually dirk or eridan LMFAO) portrayed to be fem in any manner 😢 when jake is the most explicitly feminine man in the comic. (I think the transmisogyny thats kind of rampant in this fandom means people dont want to consider those outside conventional attractiveness being feminine or transfem identities outside binary transwomen if even that😭😭) I am being the change i wana see in the world 🙏 The amount of transfem fat gay bear jake in the world increases by one every time i post
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elder-millennial-of-zion · 7 months ago
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I miss the days, way back when before October 7, when I felt like I was part of leftist circles. I miss feeling energised by leftist slogans because I thought they included me, instead of targeted me.
I miss hearing “eat the rich” and not hearing it as a dog whistle for “kill the Jews.” I miss feeling inspired by phrases like “our struggles for liberation are all connected,” instead of hearing its real meaning, “the Jews are the evil puppet masters behind everything and the world must unite against them.” I miss believing that when leftists talked about punching up at their oppressors, it wasn’t just an excuse to punch down at more vulnerable minorities that they decided were their oppressors despite all evidence to the contrary.
I miss the days when the left poured into the streets to protest cops and corporations instead of protesting Jews. I miss updating myself on those protests so I could join them, instead of to know which areas to avoid because they’ll be Judenrein for the day.
I don’t wish my eyes hadn’t been opened. I’d much rather see the truth no matter how painful and disillusioning it is, because the alternative isn’t actually “bliss.” It’s having a perpetual nagging feeling that something’s off but I can’t put my finger on it, or if I can then I must be overreacting or imagining it’s worse than it is.
But that pain and disillusionment is very real. That loss is very real. It was a community I thought I belonged to, a community I put a lot of work and energy into for many years, and there is grief at the loss of it. Grief that it’s gone, grief that it never was what it claimed to be in the first place. I guess I’m grieving the loss of that part of my identity. And grieving the loss of how people I thought were my friends and allies perceive my identity. Grieving the illusion that they were ever my allies at all, that they ever would be my allies if I needed. Because I haven’t really changed, but the way my former circles look at me completely changed. People who thought I was a good person and a good ally on October 6 decided I was the devil incarnate very literally overnight.
The person who privately reached out to me a few years ago to thank me for a Facebook post I made defending sex workers, because as a former sex worker they appreciated it. Now they’ve been posting antisemitic blood libel, the kind of rhetoric that’s already gotten Jews killed, for six months straight. I tried to tell them how much pain it causes me as a Jew to see their posts, and they only doubled down. It truly is their loss. I was a good friend and a good ally, and they threw me away because I’m a Jew. But it’s totally not because I’m a Jew, it’s because I’m the evil kind of Jew, the kind that just so happens to be the profile of ninety percent of the Jewish population.
I’m grateful I have such a strong sense of Jewish identity, because otherwise the loss of identity in this other way would be far more destabilising. I get why so many people cling to their political identities no matter how much cognitive dissonance they have to wave away; why they insist their ideology is righteous no matter how much evidence to the contrary. Without any other solid identity they would feel too adrift. But that doesn’t excuse their behavior. It’s not ok to jump on a bandwagon to persecute and kill Jews because you want to belong to something that badly, because you can’t handle your sense of self evolving with all the growing pains that come with it.
So many progressive Jews like myself have described ourselves as “politically homeless.” (Specifically in the diaspora; I know the political framework in Israel is completely different.) We can let ourselves sit in that grief. Being homeless is painful and uncomfortable, but it’s better than staying in an abusive home.
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cat9901234 · 9 days ago
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Meet cutes NYC
In which during the Miami race, a certain power couple gets interviewed and finally reveal the details of how they met.
warnings: none.
childhoodsweetheart! reader x lewis hamilton
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“Excuse me, sorry are you two a couple?” the man walks up to them, catching Lewis and especially his wife by surprise.
“We are,” Lewis smiles proudly
“Could you guys please tell me the story of how the two of you met?”
Lewis’ face instantly lights up and y/n laughs at her husband's reaction, not remembering the last time she had been asked that. “That’s a long story-, oh my god wait I think I've seen you guys on uh Insta right?"
"Yes, we go around mainly New York to ask couples how they met," the interviewer informs. “We’ve got time,” Lewis shrugs, “as long you're alright with it?” He looks at his wife knowing well y/n was always the private one about her personal life.
“Is it for your channel or something?” y/n asks politely, still a little hesitant about the idea.
“We go around all over New york but also around the world asking couples how they’ve met,” he shows them their instagram page. Y/n's eyes widen at the large following count and is satisfied about their legitimacy. 
“Sure why not, but again it’s a long story,” she laughs leaning her head on her husband’s shoulder. “Do you want to start us off?”
“We met when we were eight, I believe y/n was new to the area at the time. Anyways, I actually was on the playground by myself, didn’t have any friends at the time but this one comes along and walks up to me and compliments me because she saw me in a newspaper. We were at the time one of the very few coloured people in our school. We then became inseparable and very close with my family. She even used to look after my brother when I was away during races.”
“Almost every holiday break I would come down and watch him race, that's actually how I met Susie and Seb and Nico,” Y/n adds. 
“She used to always buy me these chocolates from the news agency for my birthday each year and we would split it, at the time because I was putting all my money into racing. But anyways, when we were fifteen, I asked her out to become my girlfriend, I was also racing more but like we would always write letters and email to contact each other. I would always get her to fly over and spend time with me during holiday breaks so we could spend more time together, hang out. When we graduated actually, I asked her to marry me,” he bashfully said, rubbing the back of his neck as his wife blushed at the memory and covered her face with her hand.
“Really?” the interviewer exclaims.
“Yeah,” Lewis nods, “you know like I didn’t want to be apart from her. She you know was—, is my everything. She believed in me when no one else wouldn’t.” 
“So what happened?”
“Well you know at the time we were so young and both so ambitious in our own rights. I think what was going through my head at the time was that we had so much to discover about ourselves and definitely at that age the relationship with the media and Lewis’ career on the rise wouldn't have worked. Also, the fact that I wanted to do so many things as well for myself would have held Lewis back, and I knew deep within me that I would have been selfish for that," Y/n continues. "You know he means so much to young kids of colour, to fans of formula one, etc and that was that. So you know we talked about it, cried and yelled about it but in the end it was very mutual and we both understood. So we broke it off—”
“Sorry, but I remember her saying you know after all the crying and yelling that I was gonna date around actresses and models, marry a model slash actress and stuff. But I remember clear as day I said to her that I wasn’t going to marry anyone if wasn’t her; and she thought I was joking—”
“Well I mean hello he was what seventeen/eighteen at the time. Also what he said was just a coincidence,” y/n cuts in.
“Nuh. Nuh, I didn’t realise it till after I married you,” he teased. Y/n rolls her eyes at his cheesiness that has the interviewer smiling from cheek to cheek.
“Anyways, long story short, we met through Nicholas, Lewis' brother. He was in Uganda helping out a charity I helped organise with a friend where we were building a school. From memory he posted about us to get some views for donating,” Y/n summed it up.
“The moment I saw it I immediately asked Nico for her contacts because I just wanted to meet her. We were in contact for about a month before I invited her to a race, we then immediately hit it off like and we dated for a year then got married.”
“Wow,” the person breathed, “so you’ve known each other since you were eight. What would you say is your favourite thing about each other?”
Y/n chuckles as Lewis can’t help but laugh at her too. 
“I think for me,” Y/n starts, “is how giving he is and how much attention he pays. Like you know even back when we were kids he would always try to get me small things like for example when I visited him in 2003 he gave me this necklace here actually,” she shows off the simple pearl pendant necklace, “because I mentioned once that I really liked pearls because from memory were talking about gemstones. But like even now he’s just so thoughtful and stuff.”
“For me it’s her kindness, and she’s always looked past first appearances cause like for me personally I was never anyone’s first choice. Whether that was games or-, or on the playground—, she chose me first and that meant so much. You know, even with my brother, she didn’t think much of it, she was never embarrassed about being seen with him, playing with him and making sure he feels included like that’s when I knew I was in love with her,” Lewis explained.
“Well, thank you guys so much!"
"no worries man, take care."
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pedrospatch · 7 months ago
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more hearts than mine
Frankie Morales x Female Reader
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summary: Frankie promises you he’s not going anywhere.
warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. no physical description of reader, no mention of her age, reader has both of her parents, reader has a little sister (15 and unnamed), reader has a close relationship with her family (cannot say i am writing this from experience oop), reader is from a small, unnamed town somewhere in the midwest (state not specified), established relationship, mention of ex-boyfriend, mentions of alcohol consumption, reassurance, fluff, smutty themes towards the end but no smut.
word count: 2k
a/n: this was not planned and very spur of the moment. i think i needed a palette cleanse from writing so much joel. it’s my first time writing for frankie but i like the way it turned out. <3 i it’s 3 am, i wrote this in an hour and it is not proofread, so please excuse any errors. this is based on a song called more hearts than mine by ingrid andress.
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“It’s late,” you worry. “Where could they be?”
Amused, your mother watches you anxiously pace back and forth in front of the dining room table. “My darling, can you please relax? They probably hit some traffic on their way back home from the lake. I bet you anything those two will be walking through the front door any second now,” she assures you. At that precise moment, her cell phone vibrates on the table, the loud buzzing noise garnering her attention. She picks it up and raises her eyebrows in complete surprise. “Oh. Or maybe not. Your father just texted me and said they’re stopping for a couple of drinks at the bar. He says not to wait up for them.”
Halting mid pace, you whirl around and stare at her. 
“You’re kidding?”
“Nope.” She shows you the text. “See?”
“Jesus,” you mutter. Shaking your head, you drop down into the chair across from hers.
“That’s a pretty good sign. Don’t you think so, honey?”
It is because your father taking your boyfriend out on a fishing trip and then taking him to his favorite bar for drinks afterwards means that their time alone together has gone well. But, even though your father had clearly taken a liking to him, he won’t ever show it. Sure, he’ll buy him dinner and he’ll buy him drinks, he’ll check his tires and take a look underneath the hood of his pickup truck to make sure everything looks good, but he’ll do it with a scowl on his face and a standoffish attitude.
“He hates me, baby. Your old man hates me,” Frankie declared after his first dinner with your family. You had both arrived in your hometown that same evening after a gruelling, sixteen hour drive to the midwest. Despite being exhausted from the trip, he’d put his best foot forward for them—he’d charmed your mother and your little sister, had them both wrapped around his finger by the time dessert had been served. But your father, oh he had been much harder for him to win over. “He barely said two words to me all night.”
“My dad doesn’t hate you,” you swore to him, rubbing a soft, soothing circle into his broad back. “Do you want to know how I know that?”
“How?”
“Because he poured you a drink.”
He’d snorted. “What, and that means he likes me?”
“Let’s not get too ahead of ourselves,” you joked with a giggle. “It’s still too early to tell if he likes you. But one thing is for sure, he doesn’t hate you. He doesn’t break out a bottle of whiskey for someone he hates, Frankie.”
Sighing, you lift your legs, pulling your knees up to your chest.
Poor Frankie. He’s probably spent the better part of the whole day just trying to figure him out.
“I like him,” your mother says after a minute. “I like him a lot.”
“What a coincidence,” you grin. “I like him a lot too.”
She laughs. “I’m serious! He’s incredible, darling. He is so handsome. He’s sweet. Seems like he’s got a really good head on his shoulders—”
“Are we talking about Francisco?” Your sister walks into the dining room with can of Dr. Pepper in one hand and her cell phone in the other.
“As a matter of fact, we are.” Your mother smiles. “Isn’t he great?”
“He’s kinda perfect, actually.” She takes a casual sip of her soda and raises an eyebrow at you. “I have to admit though, I’m afraid to get attached to Frankie. You know, after what happened with Jake—”
You wince at the mention of your ex-boyfriend’s name.
Your mother hisses her name, angrily.
“I’m just saying! When he broke up with you, it’s like he broke up with all of us. It sucked.” She shrugs, adding, “I mean, even dad was sad about it for months. Wasn’t he, mom?”
“Don’t you have a paper to write?” Your mother glares at her.
Your sister starts towards the staircase, but stops and glances over her shoulder. “I like Frankie,” she tells you, smiling wryly. “And I really hope he sticks around.” With that, she disappears upstairs.
Sighing heavily, your mom turns to you. “Don’t listen to her. She’s only fifteen, she doesn’t know any better. She doesn’t understand what happened—”
Pushing away from the table, you stand up. 
“I’m going to take a walk,” you murmur. “I need some fresh air.”
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“Hermosa?”
You stir at the sound of Frankie’s voice.
“Baby. Hey. Wake up.”
“Mm?” you mumble sleepily. “Frankie, what are—ow!”
You groan when he switches on the lamp on the beside table. Rolling over, you bury your face into your pillow.
“Sorry,” he apologizes, chuckling softly. The twin sized mattress squeaks, dipping as he somehow squeezes himself beside you on your childhood bed. He’s staying in the guest room down the hallway—you parents, who were incredibly old school, had insisted the two of you sleep in separate bedrooms during your stay. Draping his arm around you, he leans down and nuzzles into the side of your face. Even with your nose buried in your pillow, you pick up the scent of sunscreen mingled with beer. “Just wanted to tell you I’m back home.”
Lifting your head, you blink furiously until your blurred vision stabilizes.
“What—what time is it?”
“Eleven.” Frankie’s cheeks and nose are red, sunburned from having been out on your dad’s boat all afternoon. You’re willing to bet he’d forgotten to put the sunscreen on his face. Even though you’d warned him a hundred times not to forget.
“What?” You sit up, prompting him to do the same. “It’s eleven and you only now just got back?”
“Your old man took me to Gordon’s,” Frankie explains, referring to one of the only few bars your small town had to offer. It was the place where you would meet with your old high school friends to catch up with each other whenever you were home visiting. At some point this week, you would be sitting in a booth at that old bar with them, introducing Frankie, and squirming when they began to tell him embarrassing stories of all those crazy nights from your senior year. “We went in with plans to have a couple beers before coming home, but then we ran into some of his buddies there. He introduced me, they bought us more drinks, and we played a game of pool. Your dad whooped my ass, of course.”
“How did fishing go?”
“Great. Y’know, once he stopped looking at me like he wanted to throw me overboard.”
You let out an amused huff. “He would never.”
“I don’t know. That man is pretty hard to read.” Frankie reaches for your hand, lacing your fingers together. “One minute we’d be talking, shooting the shit while we waited for the fish to bite, and the next he would look at me like he was seriously thinking about pushing me off his boat and into the water.” He squeezes your hand, a deep laugh rumbling through his chest. “I spent all goddamn day with him and I still can’t tell if he likes me yet or not.”
Lifting his hand, you press a tender kiss to the back of it, a sweet token of affection.
“He likes you, Frankie,” you murmur against his skin. “I know it. My whole family likes you. Except my mom—”
He stiffens. “What?”
“She loves you.”
Frankie turns to you. Despite your smile, he can see the hint of concern in your eyes. “Baby, what’s the matter?”
You hesitate.
After what your sister had said earlier that evening, you couldn’t help but wonder if you’d made a mistake and brought him home too soon. You and Frankie had been together for about six months now, and besides having a drawer of your things at his place for when you stayed overnight, you two hadn’t really sat down to talk about what the next step in your relationship would be—you and Frankie hadn’t discussed the possibility of a future together. Truth be told, you had never felt the need to question him about where this was heading. You’d been perfectly content in allowing things to unfold between you without putting any kind of pressure on yourself, or on him. At least, up until now, you had been content.
You’d been silly to think bringing Frankie home to meet your family wouldn’t be all that big of a deal, that it wouldn’t make you consider what came next. But you had forgotten how easily your mother falls in love, how quickly your little sister can form an attachment, and how your father, despite being rough around the edges, feels every heartache you go through as if it’s his own.
You think back to when your previous relationship went down in flames, you remember the helpless look on your father’s face whenever he would see you crying. “I never liked him,” he’d said, pouring himself a glass of whiskey over ice. But that had been a lie. He’d seen him as the son he never had. He lost something, too. Your whole family had to heal from that loss along with you.
Part of you is afraid that it could happen again.
“Amor?”
Frankie’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts.
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
You glance down at your hand in his. “Frankie, the last thing I want to do is scare you off,” you start to say, a nervous edge to your tone. “Or put any kind of pressure on you to give me anything more than what you have already given me. But now that you’ve met my family, I can’t help but worry a little bit.”
He frowns. “What are you worried about?”
Sighing, you confess, “My last relationship—it didn’t end very well, Frankie. My family loved him, adored him the way I can see they’re already starting to adore you. When he broke up with me, he broke more hearts than just mine.” You force yourself to look up, and meet his gaze with a wistful smile. “I guess there’s a part of me that’s scared it’ll happen again.”
Frankie’s dark brown eyes soften. “Oh baby, there’s no need to be scared. That’s never gonna happen.”
“How can you be so sure it’ll never happen?”
“Easy, because I love you. And I know you love me.” He reaches over with his free hand and he cups the side of your face, his thumb grazing over the soft skin of your cheekbone. “I’m in this for the long haul. I wouldn’t have driven sixteen hours across the country with you to come meet your family if I wasn’t. I’m serious about you—I’m serious about us, baby.”
Frankie leans in, gently pressing his mouth to yours in a chaste, but sweet kiss.
“Do you wanna know what I see when I look at you?” he mumbles against your lips.
“What do you see?”
“Mi futuro,” he tells you. “I see my future.”
Warmth blossoms in your chest. “You do?”
“I do. Believe me, I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me, and so is your family,” Frankie grins. “Your dad is gonna have plenty of opportunities to contemplate throwing me off his boat and into the lake.”
You giggle as he kisses you again before trailing his lips down to your neck. “Frankie,” you say his name warningly as he pushes you onto your back. “What are you doing?”
“Nothing,” he says innocently, positioning himself on top of you. He plants his hands on either side of your head and dips his head, nipping lightly at the tender flesh over your pulse point. “How thin are these walls?”
“Francisco Morales, no, you are not fucking me in my parent’s house, not in my childhood bedroom—”
His bulge brushes against your thigh and you gasp.
“Guess I’ll head back to the guest room, then,” Frankie murmurs, feathering one last kiss onto your neck.
He starts to climb off of you and your hands shoot out, curling around fistfuls of his shirt to stop him.
“I can be quiet,” you whisper, biting your bottom lip. You take one of his hands and guide it underneath the hem of the oversized t-shirt you’re wearing to the apex of your thighs. “Can you?”
“Hermosa,” Frankie groans, running a finger along the damp cotton of your panties. He slips it beneath the fabric, his blood rushing south when he meets your slick folds. “God, I fucking hope so, or else I’ll actually end up at the bottom of that fucking lake.”
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divider credit to @saradika 🤍
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imagitory · 5 days ago
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I've never been more heartbroken in my life.
I was gobsmacked in 2016, don't get me wrong. I was devastated and frightened and shaken beyond words. I even had to go behind a wall and collect myself at one point that horrible November 9th, 2016, after colliding with a man wearing a red MAGA hat at work. A good chunk of us at work talked amongst ourselves about it, offering each other comfort.
But this? This is different. I could imagine dumb people making excuses for voting for Trump in 2016 -- saying that they thought a businessman would be good for the economy, saying that they wanted someone who wasn't a "Washington insider" like Hilary Clinton. Sure, it was stupid, but people can be stupid. Quite frankly, a lot of people are stupid, in this country and otherwise.
But now? Anyone who voted for Trump now has voted for a man who not only rounded up immigrants and put them in concentration camps separated from their families; bungled the response to COVID-19 so badly that the American death toll easily surpassed every other country on Earth; has poisoned the Supreme Court to the extent that they overturned years of precedence with Roe V. Wade and has basically given Trump cart-blanche to do whatever he wants while he's president; was the first president in history to refuse to concede on election day; was impeached for crimes in office not once but TWICE; was instrumental to and passionately supportive of the full-on attempted coup at the U.S. capitol on January 6, 2021 that could've very easily resulted in the deaths of his own Vice President and multiple members of Congress; has spoken glowingly of despots like Vladimir Putin and Kim Jong Un and even said he will be "a dictator on day one" if elected again; has both used slogans originally used by modern American Neo-Nazis ("America First") and purportedly told one of his ex-subordinates that he wanted generals like Adolf Hitler's...but also has by the day proven more and more just how mentally inept, vindictive, and mean-spirited he truly is.
And unlike in his previous races, Trump is ahead in the popular vote too. We can't just blame this on the electoral college being antiquated and gerrymandered AF like in the Trump-Clinton or Bush-Gore elections. Even if all of the third-party voters in this country had grown a bloody brain cell and voted for Harris so as to show solidarity against Trump and his form of American fascism, it still somehow wouldn't be enough. We could potentially blame this on lower voter turn-out -- according to what I'm seeing so far, even with all the votes not counted in this race yet, it looks like there were far less votes cast this election than in the last one, though likely still more than the 2016 race. But even so, I don't think that's the only problem. I truly think there were just a lot of people who turned out en-masse to vote for Trump. And all I can think in regards to those people is...
This is beyond stupidity or even selfishness. This is cruelty. This is large swaths of people deciding that they want fellow American citizens to suffer -- because in their minds, if those people suffer, that'll somehow make them happy. This is a large chunk of America saying, "yeah, you know all that crap about 'liberty and justice for all'? Screw that, I want a 'strong man' to bully people different from me for my own amusement." And -- perhaps -- there's also an element of feeling like their vote doesn't really have any consequences for them, so why should they care if the man they voted for is a god-awful person? It's not like that man will hurt them.
I had hoped. I had hoped, seeing the outpouring of support from liberals, independents, and conservatives for Harris/Walz. I'd hoped, seeing how many ex-Trump appointees were standing up against him, how much people were shouting their disdain for Project 2025 from the rooftops, and how many women were protesting in the face of Roe V. Wade being overturned. I truly had started to hope that America would prove we'd grown beyond our country's own original sin -- how our United States preached freedom for all while still being built on the backs of slaves and refusing to grant a vote to over half their population -- by electing a smart, successful, charismatic woman of color who sees our country as great in potential and wants us to pursue that potential as our first female president, rather than backtracking all the slow progress we've made over the last 200+ years.
But now...my hope has faded. My heart is in pieces and the world is so dark. I hardly know how I'll function at work tomorrow, even if I know somehow, I have to try. We'll all have to stand somehow. Somehow, someway...we'll have to find the strength. We'll have to stand, and we'll have to keep moving forward, even when it feels like we're a Little Mermaid walking on knives.
We'll have to stand.
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