#but we had a great day today
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We went Places and did Things
Place 1: A farm with lots of puppies and kitties running everywhere. We worked on our down stays with these kittens and a puppy who I didn't get a picture of. Hek was so good that she even let this little guy climb on top of her while she stayed in that spot. I was very impressed, not going to lie.
Place 2: Our favorite cemetery to stop at on our way home. It was so nice out we had a little picnic under the lovely trees. We talked to this really cool, nice guy who fought in the war of 1812
Herz had just "down stayed" very nicely for 3 hours so this was the only time I actually asked her to recall so we could go back to the car. I honestly didn't want to do anything. I thought I should but we just enjoyed the nice weather and good sniffs
#beans beans the magickal fruit#I have felt very neglectful the last few days because we havent done anything#Herz said she wanted to do something fun and easy#I also have been struggling with feeling like she is not a well trained dog and we dont deserve the service dog label#my mental health hasn't been the best lately#but we had a great day today
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had a pretty eventful day yesterday… after 5 years of being together diana and i got engaged!!!! we plan to get married in las vegas this summer after i take the bar exam!!
i love her with my whole heart. there’s nothing in the world better than spending every minute of your life with your best friend. words really can’t describe it ❤️
#we had a great time yesterday and bought a bunch of unusual objects at the market while we were out#an ideal way to spend a day#i will be posting pictures of some of our best acquisitions later today
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this one's for all the yuri enjoyers out there — nsft under cut
meronia event prompt(s): scar
#death note#mello#near#meronia#meroniaevent#fem mello#fem near#i had fun w this one!! i love drawing yuri even though i dont do it nearly as much as i want lol#also i love drawing bush thumbs up emoji#i let the lines be messier bc my hands have been a little sore and i am not in the mood for linework#and in honor of yuri day i should get to do whatever i want forever peace and love on planet yuri#anyway i didnt know what to do w near's hair but decided to keep it short bc i didnt want to cover her back for composition reasons#sorry for posting so late i woke up at like 10am which is late for me as of late and had school shit to do boooo#also im in the mood to talk so i made a pot pie today (no meat im vegetarian) and i followed no recipes and used my heart to make#it and i did so well it fucks so hard my heart always leads me to greatness and recipes do nothing for me bc im a culinary genius#<-blatantly untrue but we stay silly#oh!!! and also i got a thing in the mail the thing being a weevil plushie i ordered a bit back that i bought on a whim that i should not#have bought bc im saving my money but actually he makes my life a million bajillion times better and i love him dearly#anyway meronia event is making my life so much better i feel 100% better than i did 2 days ago and hopefully the joy this brings#me will stay w me for long enough to get through the rest of my summer classes bc they are killing me lol. my current ones are ending#in like a week or smth but i have 2 more in july *sobs* all this just to graduate a semester early#k anyway enjoy the yuri ...or dont. im not the boss of u. ig
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repostober day whatever today is. anyway, you ever drop acid in the middle of the woods? lol me neither, that'd be CRAZYYYY...
#these are a year old at this point but gosh it was fun#we rented a cabin on a lake#fidgetwing#drug ment#drug ment tw#i drew so many pictures and then i played hatsune miku rhythm game and i KILLED#i had just opened the app to look at the pretty pictures and then my friends like#kept spamming co-op invites at me and so i was like#fuck it ig we ball and i did GREAT i was getting the highest score every round#what a time#ah memories#lol anyway first day of work today--
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my seniors have been so quiet all year and it’s been fine cause we’ve had a lot of writing/research to do but I need them to talk to me now so i was hit by a bolt of inspiration two days ago and I made them all tell me their comfort level with sharing aloud, rating themselves on a scale of 1-10. I then averaged the class score and they’re a 4.5. I then told them yesterday we needed to raise the score the tiniest bit. And the 1’s and 2’s didn’t need to be 10’s just maybe 3’s and 4’s. And they tried! They talked more 😭
#it’s sooooo hard because when a class is quiet my default is to assume you hate me#which is so hard because I need a response. which is why I actually can handle a loud raucous class pretty well because it’s just about#holding their attention and redirecting#but when they’re quiet it’s so hard. but i’ve really forced myself to be like ‘they don’t hate you they’re just quiet’#and they ARE#and actually they are reading (not all of them lol) and a lot of them want to learn#it was really helpful going to try to capitalize on this today#I had a moment a few weeks ago where I taught them a poem and it was crickets and I was like sigh they hate it and me#but then I said wanna learn another one? and like—seven of them nodded at me with big eyes and quiet enthusiasm#and I was like okayyyyy there is something going on#it feels so different teaching them than any other class it’s been a real learning experience for me#also yesterday we were talking about Jane Fairfax and Emma hating her lolololol#and Emma being frustrated with Jane’s reserve and I teased them a little bit#I said you’re not cold but you ARE reserved and I am Emma trying to get you to tell me about Frank Churchill at Weymouth#literally lol#ALSO it hit me like a ton of bricks yesterday that this is the class where I need to tell them WHY I make them tell me all the plot details#and we go over it together#and the actual concrete purpose of it. cause it isn’t just book-clubbing it!#it has to do with guiding them through a novel but also teaching them how to do it themselves#I get so prickly when people think it’s just book club behavior#if I was in a book club i would be a tyrant which is why I belong in a classroom#ANYWAY I AM WASTING THE DAY AWAY#but i have woken up with great excitement because I’ve been mulling on the seniors all year#and I feel like I’m getting somewhere#teaching tag
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💍
#personal#got married today! super simple elopement bc we broke#had a great breakfast and we saw a musical#very nice day#im taking a bath now bc i do need my alone time and im feeling irritable bc social battery ded#cant believe im gonna hopefully spend the rest of my life with that man#hes so patient
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man, i had a rly nice day today! ;v;
#my dad and i were going to bake some cookies today but. we needed to clean the kitchen first to free up counter space#just had a bunch of junk that accumulated around the island in the kitchen. depression mess - you know how it goes. so we cleaned it all up#we got that done after a few hours and we were totally exhausted afterwards.#so we went ''phew! okay! now we just need to clear stuff off the island's top!'' ... and then one of the island's legs randomly snapped#stuff went flying everywhere. glasses broke. had to pull some shards out of my foot. and the kitchen was a mess alllll over again#so we spent another hour or two cleaning THAT up and went online to order a new island. and then we just crashed and got some pizza.#i know that doesn't SOUND like a good day but. it was actually rly fun. minor injury aside hehe. i like workin on stuff with my dad! ;v;#plus. sometimes when shit goes wrong it's just kinda funny. sometimes the universe has wonderful comedic timing.#we just spent the day hanging out and chatting while we worked and stopping for snack breaks. and the kitchen looks great now! :3#so i'm rly happy. and i'm callin today a win. ^^
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christmas eve ramble tags and some pictures of me and nice things from this year that i have randomly at 2:47am on christmas eve decided to post on tumblr. like why am I posting my face idek but I just felt reflective and i always just dump my rambles on whichever blog I'm using the most 🙈 i have not thought very hard about picking these. my motivation is that i want to force myself into acknowledging that for the majority of this year i felt good. I did good things for my health, and at work, and for my friends and family (even though I am desperate always to tell myself that i have never done anything good for anyone ever.) I found a new fun thing & lovely kind fun people to help me explore it. i got to sleep with my hand on/in Henry (cat not popstar) belly fur. yes i started having panic attacks about stuff to do w my dad, and money is tight (i mean i live in syd..) and i miss my mum and sara and i maybeee spent far too much time speaking to my ex fiance until he went on some rant about family law and I got the ick for once and for all lmao - but i was happy on many occasions.
#so we're doing Christmas tomorrow on Christmas Eve#well its 2.30am so we're doing Christmas today on Christmas Eve#ive been up late making Cypriot Grain Salad and freezing packs of scallops#no not a strange chrissie tradition just the fish place i ordered from listed them as $3.50 each so i ordered 12 just as a little two bite#mouthful each along w the oysters#and they sent 12 packs of 6#which do NOT cost 3.50 each#i actually feel a bit bad#anyway i froze most of them#we didn't do a tree this year#i think last year i did the tree and needed to needed the connection to mum#but this year when i mentioned it to Imi she sighed. and its no fun on your own#so i bought a lovely Christmas Bush and ive twisted those wire fairy lights around it and some little icicle tinsel#i need to sleep for a few hours and then get up and tidy the balcony and vacuum and clean the toilet and wrap presents#can you imagine if i had been able to have kids i am so last minute its awful#oh and a friwnd who had a horrid miscarriage#sorry they are all horrid#but shes pregnant and thats really great news#and my dad was nice to me today when we talked#also i took an extra week of leave off so now im having a month#which is so nice#im going to finish two fics#send cards and parcels to ao many people#i have replies from when my mum died ive still not done#im going to clean out the grarage#im going to swim everyday and try my harsest not to get burnt#okay maybe every second day#summer!#iveet stuff w my dad take away my happiness i had for the first half of the year - also mourning Sara#but i feel a bit more in control and im going to lean in to being proud of what i achieved this year and in finding new joy
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I can't wait for their reunion
(Robutler doodles under the cut)
These all have definitely been done before but I couldn't get them out my head
#sorry for no art post yesterday I hate double posting#but great news guys i had my autism assessment today (we all know the results)#(look at this blog)#alas reggie and prism are so funny to me. it makes me violent I have so many thoughts#sedate me or something idk#i digress prism i love you (i have drawn her every day since i designed her and I say that every time)#but it's true i DO LOVE HER#i finished ieytd 3 for myself yesterday and i would wave every time I'd see her#which is an improvement from ieytd 2 where whenever i saw juniper i called him a faggot#i love him i promise#anyways something something i found a great tragic science wives song and. i need someone to give me an excuse to talk about it or -#- i shall wilt like a pretty flower#ANYWAYS#ieytd#i expect you to die#[agent moose's art]#reginald crane#the handler#roxanna prism#roxana prism#robutler
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Fall Colors
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guess whos not going in at all this week, actually
#MY MANAGER EMAILED LIKE 2 HOURS B4 I HAD TO GO IN#she finally changed my schedule (1 day) to the night shift today#(i emailed her to be safe just kinda casually reaffirming im going in at the new time & then asking if any other shifts wanted 2 be changed#bcs that sounds great to me whstever option she goes with#she ignored that question & i get a new email from her asking if i completed a training. lets called it DOC#basically a long time ago she said 'i will send you DOC instructions soon' .. a few days pass and i get three 50 paged packets#one is called NAVIGATING DOC#im like oh ok cool that must be the DOC training shes talking abt bcs the other 2 packets were abt various trainings#NAH BRUH. APPARENTLY THE DAY IM SUPPOSED TO GO IN. SHE MESSAGES ME SOME ENTIRELY ALIEN PROGRAM#and is like 'u completed this right? cus if u didnt u cant come in today.'#LIKE?? MAYBE I WOULDA IF U SENT THE SHIT#but it's also like. dam i shouldve emailed prompting her to send what she said she would n clarifying BUT FUCK#WHY DO I GOTTA?? IM NOT THE MANAGER#she literally told me the name of the program rn thru email so i type it in and see like four hour long modules to complete#mind u i aint never even been informed a WHISPER abt this new program. nothings even labeled DOC TRAINING#but my struggle is. was i notified this?? and i just didnt see??? was i supposed to clarify with her what the DOC training was exactly??#the only thing ive heard abt doc training b4 this is 'i need to send u DOC training soon' in EMAIL. so i expected an alert#abt THE DOC TRAINING... in an EMAIL notification. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS#idk man#i dont even care bro like im busy as hell & the work is just to build clinic hours so i dont care abt the money factor#it's just like. can we get this first day jitters thing over with already?? im so over this bro#yaddayadda i emailed her an apology n ill be on that ASAP shit. but i did let her know i am basically justnnow seeing this site#n if there was any email or notif that couldve/tried to inform me of its existence 2 pls let me know / figure out how to find it#so the issue doesnt occur again & i dont have to keep botherinher which im so srry of bcs med is stress n shes just trying to get by#but still bro im a lil miffed bcs she probably thinks im stupid now and now im wondering if i AM#bcs WDYM ONLINE MODULES. AINT NOBODY SAID SH IT EVEN ABT THE EXISTENCE OF THEM!!! i wouldve pressed harder 4 clarification#if i knew it was an ONLINE MODULE i had to look out for on some randomass site i didnt even know the name of until now#instead of the EMAIL UVE BEEN 'COMMUNICATING' WITH ME ON#ARREGHHHHHHHH IM NOT STUPID. I SWEAR IM NOT STUPID FUCCK MY BAKA LIFE
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Another great concert although something felt a tiny bit more tense than yesterday...
I blame the venue especially with how the bus was right next to the queue so the guys might have felt that they had no privacy 😅
Lots of good band member interactions on stage tho 👀 plus - but I might be wrong here - I felt like I got even more attention from Bojan today the most obvious being when he got to give my little kris corner fist bumbs but held my hand in his and winked at me 🥹
I still havent told you a lot about Malmö so this may seems a big leap but yeah I promise I will get to it possibly after getting home to a computer and being able to type a diary for myself before making one for tumblr xD
#i will say it was a good gig although my fave on the tour i have attended is still Malmö#then i am unsure whether i liked Göteborg or helsinki 2 the most after that#helsinki one had a great setlist but probably have to be the fourth place for me#mostly because of my sitting spot the boys seeming to warm up to touring again and the fact i didnt get to queue#because we fangirled all day xD#i didnt get to queue that much today either#but that was because i got there later with the bus and got lost walking to the hotel and back#btw i didnt realise when booking but my hotel is a freaking boat !?!?#nice enough rooms#i am litterally just babbling now :'D#joker out spring tour 2024#joker out#jo see you soon tour 2024#sys tour 2024#Göteborg gig#my gig#mine
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I hate this fucking house so much, why the fuck do you think publicly shaming people is okay
#for context this is about dishes#one of my housemates sent a text in the group chat this morning saying it was ‘appalling’ that people could leave their dishes in the sink#and that we needed to ‘grow up’ and ‘not leave your messes for other people to clean up’#and then sent a picture of a pan that I had used yesterday and said it had been in the sink for days#I’m so sorry you’re a little inconvenienced by my one whole pan that doesn’t even have like food in it#but I had a migraine yesterday and could barely even get up to make myself food so of course I didn’t clean the fucking pan right away#and I was going to do it today but now I feel like I can’t because of the fucking public shaming around dishes that’s happened multiple#times now#like we’re all busy college students dishes might not get done right away and I can acknowledge how that’s annoying but it’s not the end of#the fucking world calm the fuck down#these housemates also suck for other reasons which is great#I don’t want to live here#j rambles
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ohhhh my fucking god nobody needs to like know any of this medical tmi but it is literally 11 pm and if im kept up one minute longer when i just laid down trying to go to sleep by my mother YELLING REPEATEDLY that she needs to pee. im going to actually go insane. she got a catheter in. Yesterday. it is working. she won't listen to anyone when they tell her that this is the case. help me jesus. im sure if a nurse comes to check on her tomorrow they'll probably get the same response. my brain will simply explode
#crow.txt#the absolute levels of stress im under could create diamonds out of free floating carbon atoms my fucking god#can i have. Literally just one day of peace. just one!! fuck!!!!#at least now i have SOME validation from everyone else of shit that mom has honestly kinda always done#be absolutely furious and bitchy usually for no good goddamn reason and then immediately turn it off to look good in front of someone else#i had a feeling mom coming home was gonna be utterly miserable sooner rather than later#i literally cannot leave my room without her yelling for dad bc she thinks im him i guess. she has gotten him up like 4 times now#what the fuck do you want any of us to doooooooooooo. according to dad shes also just been really fucking hateful today#including to her SISTER who has been facilitating literally everything medically for her for the last month plus#like on one hand i know its hard and frustrating etc etc absolutely. on the other. what the fuck are you yelling at any of us for!#whatd we do! not a damn thing for the most part! holy shit im exhausted#and then im sure she will have the audacity to wonder why i dont really want to interact with her much rn#its very apparent she doesnt really understand whats going on or how much of anything works at this point including hospice care#but i truly cannot help you when your knee jerk response is to yell and be abusive. like. dads not been great either#bc hes also one to bitch and moan and yell abt shit. but like. so is mom. more than usual#and ill actually be damned if i let her treat me like that honestly ever again. like idk for once i can just#walk away from this behavior with zero consequences. i dont have to take it anymore. im not free but at least im fuckin closer than i was#guess my aunt wasnt kidding when she said her being coherent and rational last week might be the calm before the storm
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Before I went to bed I saw the Youtube notif that TADC was going to Netflix and it INVADED my dreams so vividly I have not had such an episodic sequential serialized cohesive dream in months it was literally its own chapter its own short story
#I was Pomni it was literally Pomni POV#Caine had cooked up some sporty adventure and I was like Ummm...... no#So I found a glitch where I could hide in a technically out-of-bounds area#I had a theory that if I stayed super close to the ground I wouldn't be in the range of Caine's mod powers or whatever#Some random girl was w me I don't think she was important#Anyways I started thinking “This could hurt. When they leave#the map will not have to exist.”#I'd be crushed by the nonexistence of the area I'm in. When they come back I'll load in somewhere slightly different#and be stuck in the walls."#DIDN'T HAPPEN everything was OK#But at some point I was like man... sure is boring and scary. Sure wish my friends were here.#So I ended up finding them anyway LMAO#I told them what happened cuz they were obviously concerned and Caine got his feelings hurt???#Like. surprising moment of clarity. Everyone was shocked and uncomfortable.#Bro was like “I try so hard for U guys 🥺 I just don't get it. Why didn't you just tell me you wanted to stay home??”#Most everyone was like IDC UR OUR JAILER!! CRY ABT IT!! but me and Ragatha were coerced into pity...#Like yeah whatever. Sorry man. I'll be honest next time and not do things that could make me die. I think we were just caught off-guard.#Exchanging glances like “Wow... didn't know he could feel anything!” Like imagine if ur Furby just had an emotional outburst#and felt remorse abt it. WYD.#I think we held his hands or sum cuz all my dreams end like a Barbie movie#Episode ended and I was like Wow :) Great show#Sorta off-topic but the cafeteria today started playing very quiet carnival music for Hoco and I literally felt chills up my back cuz#I had been thinking abt Pommy all day...#I used to be enraptured by clown motif what happened#Did I throw it up#For the best...... for the best.
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anyway To Be A Spectator at that match…. the tennis rpf community goes wild.
#one day Patrick is Just Some Guy whose brush with fame (the junior open) is far behind him#and the next day he has a VERY full ao3 tag#challengers#I went to the movies today and I had a GREAT TIME!!!!#everyone else in the theater was a woman clearly there ONLY for zendaya and WHAT A SHOW we watched
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