#but this is how its like living with this many siblings
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MINI SERIES | YANG JUNGWON
CAN YOU HEAR MY HEART?
𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 : Jungwon falls for an antisocial girl with a passion for music and a love for the stars.
GENRE, fluff, slow burn , smau
( 𝐁𝐚𝐞’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 ) : I honestly have no idea where this came from I just thought of anti social Jungwon and Anti social reader coming together and this is where it got me
Part 1
Jungwon spent years perfecting his craft, spent years further building his experience and techniques with his cinematography skills. Since the age of nine he had always found delight in having held a camera in his hands, by the age of 16 he experienced his first movie that opened his eyes into the world that was cinematography girl interrupted, though the movie itself was gruesome and somber it was one which he favored for its overbearing cinematography, the color grading and timing of every scene pulled the audience in and forced them to feel everything that the protagonist herself had experienced. Age seventeen his parents gifted him a camera for his birthday, a camera which further sparked his love for film and cinema. He and his friends would find themselves making short films or every log of their lives, though it became even more serious for Jungwon when a short film made by the seven of them won their towns film festival and earned him a full ride scholarship into any university of his choice.
She didn’t like people, she never liked people because they made her far too nervous for a multitude of listed reasons. From the age of six to eight children always proved to be rude, mean and annoying. She’d simply want to make friends though the endless bullying and teasing pushed her further and further from that goal. She simply ghosted her way through the entirety of her middle school years until the time to attend high school had come, it was then that her view on people had only worsened, she sat in silence nearly every day having to observe the bullying, countless fights, the endless number of attention whores and line upon lines of men that simply wanted to get into the pants of her and the many other young women that attended the school. Simply put high school took the cake for the most hellish and torturous years of her school life.
The only ongoing thing in her life that helped her dissociate her way through were the stars she’d see from her window growing up, though as she grew older the stars stopped showing up and slowly faded from the sky, and by the time she turned sixteen it was as if they ceased to exist. Now here she is alone yet again, this time without her parents or younger siblings to fall back upon, as they had been hours, and states away.
A sigh spilled past her lips as her gaze scans the campus of her new home for the next four years. She gave a silent prayer that things here would be different from high school, that some were all older and much more mature, that things wouldn’t be the same. Boy did the lord completely disregard that prayer, because it was a near carbon copy, the only difference being more people knew how to mind their business.
Jungwon eyed her curiously from afar as she stood in the courtyard for what felt like hours just staring into the void. Hundreds of girls on campus and yet his eyes just so happen to fall upon her, her who feel the moment anyone’s eyes fell upon her in classes, her who wouldn’t even want anything to do with him nor anyone else on campus.
It would continue on like that for months on end, Jungwons eyes somehow finding her amidst the overwhelming crowd of others, like a magnet of attraction they always found her. Whenever he’d look at her her head always seemed to be lost within the clouds, her alerts seemed so distant and distracted. Everywhere she went she wore those headphones and kept her head down as if she wanted to go unseen, but he saw her he always saw her.
Jungwon was someone that had never found interest in anyone other than himself or the same six friends he had known for the last seven years. Needless to say they themselves forced themself into his life but they had always been there ever since and he never felt like he needed anyone else. He never yearned for love nor for his heart to fiend for anyone. He had never desired sex, or the touch or kiss of another because he felt it to be impractical. Growing up he always had eyes on him, though it was attention that by him always went unwanted, but for some reason, her and now he finally experienced what it was like to yearn for someone's attention, for someone's gaze to fall upon him.
For 2 months he continued on this way, hoping that she would one day look his way but she never did. It frustrated him, so much so that he couldn’t even focus on his film making, he of all people? Any time he’d try to focus he wondered what it would be like to talk to her, what did her voice sound like? What was it like to see her smile? What kind of music did she listen to? He’d thought about asking around campus and endless amount of times but he never built the courage, he told himself that this was just a passing phase, that it was simply his mind yearning for some sort of muse, but it did nothing to lessen the ongoing fever of her that lingered every time she walked by.
Then one day, she walked into the library while he had been working on a project with his art study group and he took the chance to slip away without anyone noticing. His eyes curiously drank her in as she piled books into her arms.
She noticed him staring, she always noticed him staring, but what was she to say to him? She dreaded talking to people, dreaded talking to guys even more. With unspoken words she finally turns to face him and as her eyes meet Jungwons something within them sparks a flame. Realizing she had finally been looking at him, that he now fully had her attention his eyes widened almost instantaneously.
“Um.” What was he thinking? He didn’t even know what to say to her. “Hey so I’ve been watching you all this time because for some reason you interested me and I find you pretty? Will you do a film with me?”
“Jungwon, what are you doing? We need to hurry and finish this before tomorrow.” His unspoken words had gone interrupted as his given group called him back to his place at the camera. Jungwon mentally cursed, not knowing if this was an opportunity that he would get again.
“Jungwon..” his name melted on her tongue like cotton candy, her soft voice breaking the silence as she stood alone yet again. Though for some reason she felt slight disappointment.
Weeks had passed since Jungwon saw her again, he had gotten a taste of what it was like to have her look at him, to have her eyes on him and he yearned for it. So when given the opportunity he would force himself to talk to her, even if he didn’t know what to say.
Every day he’d find himself trudging through the aisles of the library, hoping to see her and eventually he did.
“Hi, I'm here to return my books.” That was the first time he heard her voice, a voice that made his ears melt, a voice that he wanted, no he needed to hear more of. If anyone were to view things from the outside they’d think him to be crazy, even if he thought he was crazy, obsessing over some girl he had never even had the courage to approach until now. He didn’t understand why she had such a pull on him, and as much as he tried to dismiss the curious feeling and aching instinct to be close to her he couldn’t. Without thinking he pulled a random book from the shelf and stepped beside her at the opposing checkout.
“Oh Jungwon, are you checking out more books for your project? I thought you guys finished up yesterday?”
“Yeah we did, but you know I can never seem to stop the idea from flowing.” Jungwon felt butterflies burn the pit of his stomach as he felt it again, her eyes on him.
For a moment her eyes did fall upon him, she was curious, curious as to who he was, what he and the other students had been doing in the library yesterday. Why did he approach her yesterday?
“Oh yn, have you met Jungwon?” Chaewon the library assistant seemed to notice her curious gaze and decided to break the overbearing tension that seemed to be pouring from the both of you.
“You’re always in here so maybe you saw him yesterday, he’s a film major, they’ve actually been looking for someone to help with choosing scores and soundtracks for one of their bigger projects, maybe you can help them since you’re good with music?” Her eyes widened and she glanced back and forth between her and Jungwon. At that moment she prayed that the ground would swallow her whole. She gave Chaewon a pleading look as if to ask her not to say another word but chaewon simply returned her look with a look of confusion.
Chaewon was the only thing close to a friend that yn had, ever since she started frequenting the library the girl had always been there. No matter how many times yn had tried to mind her business and avoid conversation Chaewon never stopped trying. Slowly but surely the girl found herself opening herself up a bit more to Chaewon.
“Do you really? We’ve been trying to find someone in the music department for months now that can match the vibe of the film and we’ve had no luck, if it's not a problem we could really use your help.” She hates the way he looks at her, expectantly, his soft eyes so full of hope that she might say yes. She felt her heartbeat quicken and her temperature rise as she froze on the spot. She always avoided people but now she had no way of avoiding the conversation at hand.
“Maybe?” That was enough, Jungwon didn’t need to hear anything else.
“Here's my number, if you do decide that you’d like to give it a try then you can text me? I’m always in the film room really late but I can swing by your dorm to get you if needed.” Hearing those words her soul completely left her body. Him? Come to her dorm.
“No! I mean- no it's okay i'll meet you in the courtyard? The big tree where the senior event planners usually sit?”
Chaewon couldn’t help but feel like she was missing something between the two of them but knowing yn she thought that maybe she was just feeling a little nervous or awkward talking to Jungwon. Both yn and Chaewon watch as Jungwon disappears from the library.
“He didn’t even sign for the book- ” Chaewon holds the book in his hand before looking down and reading the title.
“The kissing booth. Since when does he make romance films?” Chaewon shrugs and makes her way from behind the counter to put the book ball in its rightful place, leaving the girl alone to drown in her thoughts.
The entire walk back to her dorm yn couldn’t stop overthinking and panicking. She couldn’t not show up because then she’d look like a bitch, but if she did agree to it then she would risk having to speak and be around groups of people which she completely dreaded.
Jungwon on the other hand couldn’t stop looking at his phone from the moment he had given her his number. If this were any other day he couldn’t care less about his phone. There had been many times heeseung would complain about his messages going unread or him having missed his calls since he was always working on some sort of project. Right here right now though, his eyes would shift to his phone every 5 minutes. An hour went by and he finally heard the ding of his cellphone. He blankly stared at his phone as he read the message sent by an unknown contact. What should he say?
Jungwon couldn’t help but chuckle at her panicked text, she was cute. He had gone from not even knowing her and not talking to her to wanting to only hear and see her talk. With a smile on his lips he responds to her panicked messages “meet me at the magnolia tree”
Part 2 (in progress)
#enha#enha fics#enha au#enha smau#enha fanfic#enha fake texts#enha fanfiction#enha jungwon#yang jungwon#jungwon x reader#jungwon fanfic#enhypen jungwon#jungwon#enhypen fanfiction#enhyphen fanfic#enhyphen x reader#enhypen fic#enhypen fluff#enhypen x reader
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rewatching s1 and in ep3 w*ndigo, dean makes a joke about not bringing provisions into the woods just to pull out a bag of peanut butter m&m’s and stick with me here, it’s why the later seasons’ “goofy dean” loses me
this moment is clearly a joke but if you think about it too much, it also makes some sense; a family size bag of peanut m&m’s is calorie dense and even the high sugar is good to keep you moving which they need on an overnight hunt. it also shows how due to their upbringing, they’ve had to eat lower quality food, things they always had access to that was cheap and also in bulk
what does dean eating ghost pepper jerky then tipping water on himself exist for other than to be a cringy joke? what does smelling old chinese food, testing to see if it's still good then shaking his head with cabbage hanging out his mouth when it isn't serve? it's just to make him look stupid and contrast sam's healthy/clean diet (and superiority but that’s another conversation) which has always existed but it used to be nuanced and natural
we see dean as a child give up the food he wanted to eat so sam could eat it. (“i’m sick of spaghetti-os,” “you’re the one who wanted them,” … “i want lucky charms!” “… there’s only enough for one bowl and i haven’t had any yet!” proceeds to give them to sam, 1x18) we know he hustled and stole food to ensure sam ate. (“so, what’d he take?” “get this- peanut butter and bread.” 9x07)
we also see throughout the early seasons dean teasing sam about his salad or healthy choice while he eats some form of burger or other fast food (or notably, cheerfully eating prison food that sam won’t touch, 2x19). it's typical sibling teasing but it also shows that it isn't new for sam to eat like that and for dean to know he eats like that
sam being picky isn't just a character trait they chose for him, it's a result of how dean raised him; he raised him to like and want healthy food and be food secure enough to reject food he didn't want
but dean eats anything he is given and seeks out unhealthy - cheap, plentiful, filling - food
he is the opposite of picky to the point of it being a consistent bit; they show him multiple times eating when it's socially frowned upon to do so eg. questioning a grieving victim when they're trying to be discreet (1x14, 2x15, 2x18)
a similar moment to the chinese food is in 4x19; dean wakes up in the car while sam brushes his teeth outside and is hungry. sam says there's a sandwich in the backseat, dean smells it and recoils bc it's an old tuna sandwich. the moment is funny on its own but it also exists as a comparison of their lives to adam's; he has a loving mother, goes to school and importantly, a steady stable childhood
it’s a joke with a purpose
it also supports dean's food insecurity; he wakes up and is immediately hungry, enough to complain about it and seek out food before anything else
dean is always hungry bc he never has access to nutritionally rich foods bc he got used to using the money he earned to buy sam's more expensive food. he got used to his cheaper, denser foods and grew up with (and continues to live with) intermittent access to said foods. think of how long it takes to drive from one state to another; how many hours it can take to see another town that offers food, if you arrive at a reasonable enough time for anything to be open. also think how they can’t keep any food beyond what fits in an esky; nothing that needs defrosting, nothing can be heated up. it’s bags and jars and take out for as long as they can trust it
then they get the bunker which has its own kitchen
dean even describes himself as "nesting" when he decorates his room, something he hasn't had since he was four years old, and he uses said kitchen to cook a burger from scratch that he is proud of. he is food secure for the first time in his life and it shows in how often he cooks for both himself and sam
so these moments where they have him acting goofy regarding food are no longer character driven and only exist as a joke which is why they come across as cringy and out of character compared to similar earlier moments
a lot of my issues with dean's characterisation started when they introduced the bunker. the argument can and is made that the reason these jokes happen is bc he feels safe in the bunker, that bc he now has a home he can relax and unmask but that still doesn't feel sufficient. they crank up these sillier moments for both of them, giving them a sort of playing house comedy vibe of two roommates with completely different personalities but it doesn't feel like an authentic progression. it feels forced; an attempt at humour for humour's sake
food stopped being an informed part of their characters and their trauma and instead became flanderised; sam is the judgy vegetarian health nut and dean is his borderline slovenly carnivore counterpart
#12 yr old dean throwing a bag of veggie chips at sams head and saying ‘dont forget your vegetables’ actually makes me want to scream#sam not knowing or not acknowledging how much dean did for him throughout their childhood kills me#hes always saying how bad it was or later on saying at least john did his best#it wouldve been so much worse if dean was just a little more resentful#its not limited to the later seasons ill fully admit that#it literally became a plot point in s7 with the leviathans infecting the corn syrup and dean complaining about eating ‘rabbit food’#bc hes ‘a warrior’ and needs his ‘road food’ while sam brings him to a farmers market#it comes up in at least two seperate episodes and it started to annoy me then too trust me it already felt ooc#its not just food moments either; i hate the food socks and his robe and playing with the sword too#whenever they decide to make him act stupid to help bolster sams smarts and maturity#something that used to be naturally occurring without tearing dean down bc deans smart too and was literally parentified hes plenty mature#the narrative tries so hard to make dean the dumb fighter and sam the book nerd and its such a disservice to both of them#dean isnt an idiot and not just about hunting; he has a favourite author and an encyclopaedic knowledge of music and movies#hes just as learned about sam when it comes to hunting and the show used to have that; even correcting sam and explaining things to him#and sams had plenty of one on one fight scenes AND fight scenes against dean that are almost always draws#you cant show them with this nuance then act like it never existed#i remember bitch#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#carry on my wayward son#talk meta to me#supernatural#spn#dean winchester#sam winchester#meta
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Messy doodle of me and my siblings
#drawing#art#digital art#doodle#i did start the fight gunna be real#I we were all on the couch together bc as my friend says my families just a pack of werewolves bc we like to be close#and then my 10yo brothers face just looked so enticing like it just NEEDED a foot and so I shoved my foot in his face#and then my sister was like lets see how YOU like it and then they both attacked me#and then all of our feet were in each others faces#I wouldn't be shocked if many of you lost any respect you had for me after this#but this is how its like living with this many siblings#so what I'm 22 and he's 10 I will fight him on the daily#and then on my 20yo sister and me get into it easily#it was a brawl waiting to happen#my 12yo brothers in the back#minding his own business#bless his heart
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somebody shoot me with a gun until I am dead before I write the first chapter of that pirate thing for like. Genuinely the eighth or ninth time.
#i have versions i like the vibes of#i have versions i like the pacing of#i have versions i like the writing of#i have not a single one that manages to hit even 2 out of those 3 criteria#Like. I think part of the issue is the setting is dreamy its soft and floaty and things arnt Right#but the first thing that happens is a guy loudly boasting about how much hes going to enjoy sexually assaulting his deuteragonist#hes lying. but Toi'uhla doesn't know that. The people ze is choosing to sacrifice zerself for dont know that.#the child whos experiencing the fear of death for the first time doesn't know hes bluffing either.#and the entire time theyre on a boat thats floating in empty nothing in a universe that has no stars left.#So much of making a tangible Threat like that hit is slowing for a moment and describing the ugly details of like#existing. as a physical person in a physical world. This horrible thing is happening and while it does the wind is messing up your hair#That sort of thing.#But there is no wind. there is no water. or rain. Toi'uhla's sense of smell is almost non existent. so ze cant think about the body oder#of that many people in that close of quarters.#And all while this is happening. i have to set up that these are two alien species with distinct cultures and Very different perspectives#on what is happening. Lordakai Senior is the one who lead the raid that killed Toi'uhla's sire and zer siblings.#But ze only knows the name Lordakai. bc for Zer it is completely reasonable to assume that the two Lordakai's are the same guy#Koita are long lived. Toi'uhla has never had reason to learn how to tell how old they are#Lordakai jr is absolutely riding on his dads name. but he doesn't know his dad was a privateer#So like. Theres a lot of shit happening in a weird setting#With two characters that need to Mesh while both putting up complete fronts.#and it needs to set up the stakes and themes for the rest of the damn story.#qnd its just a lot man. I love this project. i love these characters. but there's so many moving pieces bc theres had to be to make enough#Stuff to fill out the long spaces where they're just. on a pirate ship. being bored.#im probably over thinking this#blehgh
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as someone with a lot of sisters (no brothers) it's very funny and frustrating how often I'll tell a story about my sister and people will follow up with "which one?" bitch you do not know. I will follow up by saying Denise, Sally, or Crinkle Cut French Fry and it will make no difference whatsoever. You don't know their names. I barely know their names. If it was important which sister I would identify them by age and/or occupation, whatever's relevant.
#especially funny to me when ppl at school do this#literally all of them like 1000 miles away from here. saying their names adds unnecessary confusion#i should just start making up sisters#never clarify exactly how many i have#maybe fabricate step siblings#(oh my god i actually. well. i don't technically have step siblings but i don't *not* have step siblings)#(my dad is living with his girlfriend who has kids)#(also one of them has the same name as my actual half sister which. if i ever get close to them its gonna be so confusing)#rambles
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so mad abt the ethel cain shit rn
#i was reading the tags I KNOW i shouldnt have read the tags it was a mistake there is so much vile fucking hatred and behaviour there#people posting about how she lied about getting doxxed (she didnt) while simultaneously saying they way they checked if it was true was by#checking a website specifically used to host files that dox people. like why do u know about that website. why r u checking it#and the post on that website that IS there is thescariest fucking shit. by the wording it was obviously written by a radfem so#idk why radfems are claiming shes framing radfems for the dox when its very fucking obvious. and it has everything man#her deadnames her address her parents names their address her GRANPARENTS names their address. can you fucking IMAGINE.#how fuckinf terrifying that is? to be openly trans and for so many people to fucking HATE you for that and ur HOME being posted online#and if u want to go live at ur siblings house for a while ur not gonna be safe their either bc guess what! they have their address too#absolutely fucking vile. i dont know how anyone can believe this is activism or justified or remotely okay. ur fucking scum#im so fucking mad. so many trans people are being fucking murdered and you do that. im so fucking mad.
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Whatever
#and its the only listed entry for his relationships ?#does he not talk or interact with anyone else in the series ?#Trigun loveblog#he loves vash#damien do nooootttt read this this is spoilersd#it makes me smile so much that the entry is written like this because they could easily have said something like ...#'theyre siblings with an intense rivalry stemming from their difference in ideology' but no its straight to the point#like yeah knives really did make that face when he saw the scars. and yeah he did scream in rage and grief when vash was slowly dying#and yeah vash was the one who gave him the will to live again and yeah knives is the reason vash is alive#like seriously whatever#i mean of course vash is the reason knives lost everything and knives is the reason vash is constantly putting his life in danger#this and the way knives gently hands vash a gun and tells him to shoot someone in stampede is so funny#hes like whats wrong ? (gentle) go on and do it (reassuring) and when vash is shaking too much and lowers the gun hes like (fond sigh of#exasperation) i have to do everything for you. hes so funny he loves his brother#and what right does knives have to be calling vash his little brother in the manga. you two were conceived in the same instant chill ...#im just very glad that loving vash is one of knives core personality traits and the other is being evil. its not trigun if your brother#isnt about to burn the whole world down just to create paradise for the two of you. and i cannot get enough of how one sided it is at the#start like the first thing knives does after they crash land is to attempt to help vash stand. the second thing he does is beat the hell out#of vash because hes annoying and whiny. and vash has tried to kill knives so many times but in the end he just cant do it#knives has been on the other side of his barrel so many times and so many times vash would get mad at him and then fail to pull the trigger#its so cutee theyre beautiful twin boys ... exactly the same height ... sorry im just happy again that tessla is in stampede
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DARN, missed it again! 2nd anniversary of being a they/themer :D
#just me hi#i should cue a post for next year cuz i just Keep missing it hfhsv#cool though!! two years of queer yeah babyyy#i now have it/its but they/them was where i started hehe :>#i've considered neos but you know i think they'd be a bit much for me lol#character customization Truly#//i am NOT missing this blog's birthday. proooollyyyy hghfsh#these aren't such huge things but i like to know things have happened hfsh :3#these are two things i really only celebrate on here so i've just Gotta say it :33#//anyway i've been listening to the radio a lot (did i say that? i think i told you that some weeks ago lmao) and it's Funnn (mostlyyy) :D#yes they play the same 15 songs over and over and i'm starting to learn all the words to even the most unremarkable ones but that's part of#the Fun :DD#been listening to it because once in a while they play a song i already have in my playlist (yayy !!) or a song that i like (which then goe#in the Playlist (yayy !!)) that and it supplies a background track to whatever i'm talking about with my siblings which is funny at times#/imagine. you've slipped up. a secret of another's you were never supposed to know was mentioned by accident. so instead of#trying to excuse yourself from guilt you admit to knowing even More. the person you're speaking to is betrayed confused and overall upset.#and you're trying to get in contact with a ghost to give you pointers. it's not great. in the background Lovin On Me is playing#that's how our games have been going hfhsvhf#/i let them play in the plots of my stories sometimes and it's So Ridiculous Dude#i've had to ban specific organs from their characters because they were being wretched little beings. it Was funny though i'll not deny hfh#they've tormented shye + weirded out oath + killed and been killed many times#there were a couple times i saw genuine horror on their faces and i am living on that i'm ngl hfhsvbhs#like the horse thing! it would take a sec to explain so i won't go into it but oh i hurt myself laughing Lolll (it was dark but it was stil#funny hfbvs)#//OH i've gtg now lol --#ciao ciao see you somewhere later from now !! :D
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guys what if i want to make my own apollo justice game.
#i need to write a prequel to aa4 pls pls pls pls pls#okay get this: so phoenix isnt disbarred yet and he doesnt have trucy. hes still taking and winning cases#one day he gets a call from edgeworth and hes all like ''wright i need your assistance'' and hes like what for and edgeworth goes#''ive been given the most ridiculous case and i think youre the only man in law who can take care of it''#so phoenix bikes his ass to the detention center and boom. child behind bars#and phoenix is like ??? hey kid what are doing here. and this kid is the most surly mfer on the planet like you couldnt get-#-a word out of him if you tried. hes kinda giving phoenix the stink eye too but hes just the littlest guy on earth#and phoenix feels bad for him so he tries to get a rundown of the case (maybe edgeworth gave him an autopsy report or smth beforehand)#but get this. the kid still wont speak. he hasnt even moved a muscle. and after some prodding you find out this little dude-#-doesnt speak english (i dont love aa6 but i think apollos tragic backstory can be interesting so we're going w that but taking it seriousl#anyways so maya is like omg this kid is speaking khurainese but hers is kinda broken bc shes not from the mainland and only knows it-#-from like prayers#so you only get bits and pieces of the kids testimony. plus he still doesnt wanna talk bc ''dhurk told me not to talk to you''#so you start following the new lead but you ask too many questions and apollos like oh shit i said too much and wont talk to you anymore#but now you have two leads: khur'ain and a man named ''dhurk'' plus the fact that this is kid might be new to america since-#-he cant speak english but is smack dab in the middle of california. its all v curious and phoenix wants to get to the bottom of it#for the rest of the case i feel like it would go in the direction of ''we dont know exactly whats up w this dhurk guy or where this kid-#-came from but we do get him acquitted and phoenix is able to save him from the dark path he was heading towards'' thus steering apollo-#-in the direction of law and giving him a wayyyy better reason than aa6 gave him <3#i kind of like the interlinked nature of ace attorney's storytelling. like everything leads into smth else and everyone is impacted-#-by another person before they even become properly entangled w each other's lives#like how mia faced dahlia years before she met phoenix but dahlia was the one to connect them#or how trucy gave phoenix the diary paper but she's also the one who ropes apollo into the waa. even before they know they're siblings#or how lamoire left apollo and trucy as children and when they reunite as adults they cant recognise each other but they all find each-#-other anyways#i could go on but i think this could be cool yknow esp bc i think the most interesting thing about apollo's aa6 backstory is his life-#-post dhurk. like where did he stay? was he a foster kid? was he put into the system? how did that affect him? what kind of ppl took him in#i just wanna know how that whole thing would have effected him bc like when yiu think about it how did he even get to america?? his dad's#-considered a terrorist. idk man i think its interesting and apollo and dhurks interactions are one of the only good parts of aa6
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me realizing that i have been ruined for the rest of my life now i will never be able to be in any situation were the songs riptide or formation are playing without it awakening a media studies sleeper agent within me
#like cannnot listen to those songs without immediately thinking abt the music videos and like. media language and representation theories#and that ability stops being useful in like. less than a week lmao !!!#although the even worse thing abt riptide is that my sibling became a rly big fan of the song around when we saw toy story 4#(<- my worst enemy bad sequel alert !! but not thee current point) and they like. pointed out the lyrics#“this cowboys been running from himself/and shes been living on the highest shelf” in like. relation to woody and bo peep respectivly#and i still fucking think of that when i hear that line. SO THANKS A LOT I DONT EVEN LIKE THE MOVIEE OMGG !!#alos um um for those lines in the music video postmodernism we literally see a cowboy running from himself#and hes been living on the highest self we see a view of a woman on a balcony that appears to be from the presepctive#someone watching her from some bushes smth smth objectification male gaze SEE I KNOW MY STUFF !!!#obviously going to say more than smth smth in my exam btw just cirrenly way to latee to bother for a tumblt post#anyway. someone shld do a poll abt how many people here have studied media studies i tihnk it wld b interesting#both bc of tumblrs bad media literally rep and bc of how much of tumblr is fandom and how much of that is media analysis#(not a huge amnt BUT STILL YKK. ITS PART OF IT !!!)#flappy rambles
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Living alone with my cats is my anti social younger selfs biggest dream. Sorry I can't sleep over... No my cats need to be fed sorry.... I need to be home before 8pm...
#miranda talking shit#I prefer having sleepover at my place and always have. I was terrified of everyones dads and siblings#Now its like... I actually can only visit people over the day bc my cats need to be looked after lol#Not that i have many people to visit as an adult... But one friend suggested an sleepover and im like yea sounds fun#Youre gonna have to come here tho 😂#I have my issues with living alone but wheb it comes to having people over its so good#I dont need to think about my parents being around or siblings... Its just us and my cats#Not to be autistic on main again but im unfortunately uncomfortable in any social situation but if it happens in my home#At least i know how my bathroom works and sink#My fear is coming to an house with an sensetive toilet and you use too much paper and it plugs like thats a fear#Even if i just pee i have bad anxiety about that lol. Or anytime i need water... Some people have weird taps#Some takes forever to get cold water... Some have their glas in different cabinets than me#Ill be weird trying to find then and failing. God so much can go wrong#Autism tag
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I just found something under the toaster oven that I wish I could Forget
#my brother drives me insane with his fucking Thing about caps#its like hes blind to them!!#do you know how many caps i find in the kitchen??? TOO MANY#i just found a Pringle cap and a mayo cap under the toaster oven#a mayo cap#which i could only tell was a mayo cap bc its the only condiment we have with that shape#it did not look like mayo anymore#he also put dirty dishes in with the clean ones despite my little magnet i made to indicate the dishes are clean#and he didnt tell me which ones were dirty so i didnt realize until i put some away#he also kicked a giant hole in our bathroom door when it was stuck on something#he was in a rush so kicked it open#with a shoe on which he should NOT have had on in the apartment#and its a shit door so it just caved#that i actually excused bc i found it funny and i hated that door anyways#but i did make him buy materials so i could superglue a frame around the hole to make it art#it looks cool now#anyways this is my daily sibling complaint to send to the void bc ive already bitched to my friends too much about him today#i do laugh most of his stuff off but the mayo cap almost made me vomit so i did send a passive agressive text to our family group chat#personal#he could be much much worse and used to be worse#and im fine dealing with his habits to save money on rent bc i could not afford to live here on my own#but the caps are starting to get to me bc i find them on the floor out in the open and im like#he SEES them right?? no???
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Do you consider any of the non protagonist yakuza girls well writen?
I think none of them had rights
#Thanks for the ask !#like you have to actively like girls to notice them theyre inconsequential#also who is this why are you sewing discorse in my inbox#i spelled discourse wrong. my mom ordered the dog trainers to train ollie right now because he is insane and hes eating soo many treats#not because hes a good boy but because they are tossing that shit at him#they were literally almost there with yasuko#i thought her story was so fucking interesting ...#like its really not a fault of the girls they are all pretty good characters in their own right#like we have a variety of them too. we had miss tatsu who was out there turning guys inside out but she randomly had to go get kidnapped in#order to complete kiryus training arc. like how funny would it be for the whole thing to be staged and miss tatsus like Lol good job kiryu#for passing my test. oh this guy ? yeah he did get the better of me but i kicked the shit out of him then roped him into my schemes. dont#you think practical application is more effective than training ? anyway theres nothing more i can teach you but you can come train whenevr#we didnt even get an in game appearance for yuko but apparently she was a massive troll but too cute to get into any real trouble#mirei was. . . i literally said ‘are you kidding me’ when they revealed what happened to her like seriously ? is this real ? they did#that ? like literally she should have been living it up in cahoots with katsuya and being so sexy and divorced forever. she should have#faked her death because every single parentsl figure haruka had leaves her. and god haruka like honest to god i love that she just ran off#like that i thought it was so kiryu of her to be an absent father. but also my friends have all brought up very good points which is that#haruka should NOT have gone back to morning glory like she should have stayed in ono michi with her loser girlfriend whos a boyfriend with#her new extended family and only go back every now and then to see her siblings honestly i hated that .... like girl spread your wings ..#choose where you want to roost stop going back !! just get out !!!!!! its literally okay to tell the rest of your family ‘i dont wanna wipe#your asses forever i love you guys but im out of here’. and god i .. as much as i loved y0 makoto should have left her shitassed husband#girl had a whole ass baby with him ... find someone better im sorry ..!!! like whatever i know that thst was the ‘best’ option for her and#she deserves financial stability and a rich doctor husband but she also deserves crazy sex with a girl with one eye#i think what yumi did was awesome but like. actually i have no complaints about yumi. wait no i do. kazama was a shitass for marrying her#off to that politician because he couldnt stand having a woman in his house. im now thinking of that unecessarily hot doctor from y0 wtf was#her deal. and god the unnecessarily hot cho-han lady from y5.. oh wait ako had rights. she fell in love with kiryu at first sight then got#over him which is literally the best thing a girl could do for herself. PLUS she throws molotovs and is generally awesome#i cant remember any other girl. oh yeah god reina. .. reina .... god milky though .... i think she was fantastic and i want her badly. and#yayoi fucking disappeared after a certain point in time and ran off to another city with her baby daddy and sugared him to open a bar#well its not canon but im certain thats what happened because she literally went radio silence like girl where are you ....
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Oh yeah..... midnight gospel be hitting.... sitting in my bed fuckin. Crying. Get a grip girl
#Its the trudy ep which is actually the episode that made me keep watching#I love love love this episode.....#Something about how.......... idk.... its a very profound ep that I can't explain and it's a nice cry#This ep kind of shaped my outlook on life especially after finding out about my friend dying#All the regrets and things left unsaid.... I make my peace daily by being really straight up#If I love and care about ppl I tell them... I say they are appreciated and cared for man#I am always thankful for people and I *love* people as a whole#And as long as the people around me intrinsically know that they are loved and cared for and cherished.... like that's it#That's the end game truly#I will never ever be sorry for that. This was THEEEE episode.#There's a lot of nuance behind my feelings best described by revolutionary girl utena#But still. I'm deep enough in my tags bc I'm crying over my s/o but not in a bad way#Fml I am so grateful to him as just an entity. As a person in my life even if our lives only intersect for this brief period of time#He hasn't been texting me much and we didn't talk much at work and I didn't even get a goodbye (rude lol)#But I know he was having a rough day. I know he needs a bit of tlc.#He could be on a downswing because I am certainly on an upswing#So I'm kind of like trying to focus on doing my own thing rn without worrying about it#Because I can't do anything about it so I might as well continue My Thang#But as I sometimes come to terms with us never talking again (gotta be prepared at all times to be ghosted)#I also come back to terms with needing him to really understand#how many people in his life depend on love cherish and admire him#And im not just talking about me... he has a lot of siblings and a not great mom. Two kids he loves.#He has always taken care of everyone else in his life#He deserves to really know and idk. It makes me think of this moment.#Realizing how much I dont ever want to question if he knows#I don't want to question if I could've done more or tried harder etc. I did my very best and didn't lie cheat steal or whatever#I am so grateful to him for letting me have that. Even if nothing can come from it in the end#Even if we should be torn apart!!!! Take my revolution!!!#Anyways. Here's wonderwall#Banger of an episode. Worth the rewatch
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Im not an only child but I've been thoroughly convinced it's most people with siblings that don't know how to act lol
I know so many other people with siblings who are sooooo selfish and unadjusted cause they never got enough attention and love and they never learned how to behave with people they aren't related too.
People without siblings should be required to undergo rigorous training before they're allowed to be a roommate
#i basically had like 3 parents that i lived with#so my sister and i got a little more attention than most people with siblings#that and my mom has a sister and knew personally what its like to get ignored#so she tried to make sure we didnt feel that way#but so many people with siblings dont know how to act around people they arent related to#and seem to think having more than one kid means theyre kids will be better when in reality they dont wanna give their kids attention#and just want the siblings to make up for it
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#also how are older people even lucid and can notice time because i ate a red apple today and thought saint nicolas day was soon...#alsooooo feel like shit because theres so many people shaped holes i wont ever be able to fill because my family is so fucked up and unlovin#ALSO noticed fully that i wont ever ever be a kid again and i want to time travel and shake 12 year old me for a bit..... what a waste my#childhood has been :(#about that person shaoed hole im talking about siblings and a loving aunt/uncle :( i visited my dead aunts grave a lot#when i was in croatia :(( and my family lives in soooo may places its so sad i never see any of them -> we dont get along well#sham!s rambles
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