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comeandreadawhile · 4 years ago

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HCs for Adopted Boba au

• Either on Geonosis or after attempting to kill Mace that one time

• Boba sticks to Obi-Wan like a leech. Obi-Wan brings him to council meetings because it’s just easier for both of them (Boba gets stressed when he’s away from Obi-Wan for too long and council meetings can take most of the day, and Obi-Wan worries about Boba being anxious and so on in a viscious circle). Boba will get his schoolwork done on the floor next to or behind Obi-Wan’s chair, sometimes Plo will give the boy treats or puzzles. He’s clearly plotting a new murder for Mace every day but also clearly doesn’t care what they’re talking about enough to interrupt or remember the next day so they’re chill with him being there.

• If it’s Geonosis, Anakin’s big brother vibes are all directed at Boba, who is grateful to Ahsoka for being there after Christophsis to take Anakin’s unwanted “advice” as his new padawan. If it’s after that one murder attempt, a) Anakin will totally get the attempting to murder Mace thing cuz....been there done that, but that’s not okay stop it (hypocrit), and b) be tired from dadding Ahsoka, but happy to have a new addition to their chaos squad.

• I subscribe to @elfpen’s idea about the Jedi getting little apartments instead of dorms. unless they’re not assigned to a master yet. Boba gets Anakin’s old room when/as Anakin’s moved out to be Ahsoka’s master.

• Obi-Wan goes to Kamino to get EVERYTHING from the Fett apartment because one day Boba might want his father’s armory, or books, and if all of Jango’s shirts end up in Boba’s bed as soon as the boy has them then Obi-Wan makes no mention of it.

• Navigating what to call each other is takes some time, as Obi-Wan starts out being called by his first name, and ‘dad’ and ‘buir’ were both for Jango, but as Boba starts getting attached and comfortable, “O’buir” sometimes makes an appearance.

• Boba and Cody are in an odd space. Boba doesn’t like Cody telling him what to do, in any capacity. Not that Cody often does, if only for Boba’s safety or comfort. But even things like “bundle up if you’re cold” really get under Boba’s skin.

• In that same vein, Cody wants to help and comfort but he doesn’t want to be overbearing; Boba both does and doesn’t want the comfort. Cody isn’t, and can’t be, Jango. He can’t be exactly the father Jango was, and doesn’t have the same memories with Boba that Jango had; but they can make new memories, and Cody can be there for him in whatever way Boba needs to the best of his ability. Cody doesn’t hug like Jango, but it’s still good. He can’t have his dad’s hugs, and Boba doesn’t want to be unfair to Cody by expecting them. He doesn’t want a standin, nor does he want Cody to feel like one. He wants his dad, but Cody is there and trying his best to be what Boba needs in his dad’s absence.

• Cody doesn’t make mention of it when Boba crawls in bed with him and Obi-Wan. He merely shifts the blankets over them while Obi-Wan frets over the boy.

• Cody doesn’t make mention of it when Boba is sick with a fever and keeps calling him “dad”, just holds him tight when he wants held and brings him soup when he wants to eat, constantly making sure the wet rags are cold enough to be useful.

• Boba starts calling Cody “Kote” when he’s comfortable and relaxed

•Cody might’ve cried the first time Boba called him “papa”. Because “papa” wasn’t for Jango, or Obi-Wan. “Papa” was all him.

• Obi-Wan makes sure to use Mando’a in the apartment so Boba doesn’t forget it; it broadens Cody’s use of it beyond battlefield necessities as an added bonus. Cody teaches the 212th, and Rex, what he learns.

• Obi-Wan gets a list of foods Boba got growing up and works to recreate them, with taste tests at most every step to try to get them as close to what Jango made as possible. Even the ones Boba didn’t particularly like in case his tastes change when he’s older

• Boba gets away with a lot by being cute

Mace: He absolutely did! He shouldn’t behave like this!

Obi-Wan *knowing full well Boba did whatever Mace is yelling about*: My precious little—look at him Master Windu, he could never, my sweet child, how dare

Plo *also knowing what’s up*: poor sweet lad, here have a candy

Yoda *a troll*: Calm yourself, you should, Master Windu.

Mace *covered in whatever evil Boba was up to that day to get revenge for his father*: D:<

• Boba can and will perch on Obi-Wan’s leg and glare at Mace during a council meeting

• Plo is Boba’s go-to babysitter; Rex can only counteract so much of Anakin and Ahsoka’s energy and has enough to deal with in that household already. Plo is really good at keeping Boba calm while he’s separated from Obi-Wan, and Boba and Wolffe get along surprisingly well.

• Obi-Wan tries and fails to keep Boba out of the war but his new murder child would probably be more anxious sitting around the temple waiting for him than on the battlefield. Boba holds his own, is comfortable doing missions with both the 212th and 501st if he’s with his Jedi siblings, proving to be an asset with how well Jango trained him in stealth and recon.

• Boba now has a large support system, beginning with Obi-Wan. Boba gets a brother-uncle in Anakin, as Obi-Wan’s son-brother thing, and as Anakin’s daughter-sister thing, Ahsoka is now Boba’s big sister-aunt. Cody and the 212th are pretty protective when other groups of clones give Boba a cold shoulder (they get it, but still). Rex gets best uncle status, and also cool big brother; depends on whether he’s there with Cody or Anakin.

•Boba can and will sleep on Obi-Wan during a council meeting if his finishes his schoolwork and doesn’t feel like leaving or doing anything else.

• That business with Barriss in season 5 wouldn’t have happened because Jango taught this boy well enough to know when a) somethings fishy and b) someone’s being set up. Who was communicating with workers in that temple from anywhere on Coruscant? How convenient and coincidental and baseless is any evidence being turned up? Boba would’ve been like “sounds like nano bombs, who’s got that tech? Time to go into the underworld, dad had contacts leggo”

• Boba, who’s listened to every worry Anakin has to come Obi-Wan with about Padme: bro maybe you need to stop talking to her. Doesn’t sound like either of you are happy in this “friendship” you’ve got going on, so either sit down and talk it out or maybe it’s time to make new “friends”

• Boba would destroy Lux. Telling Anakin everything and getting him and Rex in on the party makes it much more fun. Ahsoka might be content to move on after angry words and a slap but they’re throwing hands

• Boba might know about the chips

•Dooku probably checks in over holocall like a grandpa. Like “*taunt**taunt* CIS will win *taunt* anyway how is young Master Fett? I’m sure my grandpadawan is a fine father but how are things? Surely the bright young man knows who to join when the time comes—and to get enough sleep, so he’ll grow tall, and—“

#star wars #obi wan kenobi #boba fett #anakin skywalker #ahsoka tano #commander cody #mentions of #captain rex #codywan

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spaceorphan18 · 4 years ago

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do u think Kurt has ever had sex w anyone aside from Blaine? I sort of like the idea that he really took his dad’s word to heart and only attached sex to feelings, which is why it was so important to him in their relationship. Personally I don’t believe he had sex with Walter or Adam because of the body language he had around them. I don’t want it to be like “Kurt is a virgin saving himself for Blaine” but more like Blaine is the only one he’s ever felt deeply enough to have sex. thoughts?

I understand the sentiment of your feelings -- I do, because I was once there during the original run of the show. And there’s nothing proving things one way or an other -- so, even after you’ve read what I have to say, if you feel differently, that’s perfectly fine and valid! The text is pretty open to any kind of interpretation.

Before I get into it, I want to discuss your comment:

I don’t want it to be like “Kurt is a virgin saving himself for Blaine” but more like Blaine is the only one he’s ever felt deeply enough to have sex.

So, I want to start by saying when I was younger, I didn’t understand how people could just have sex with people they weren’t in love with. Part of it is because my Mom was a lot like Burt, and gave me a talk very similarly to what Kurt receives in the show. Part of it is, I’ve learned, is because I’m demisexual, and I’ve never felt the need to have casual sex. But as I’ve gotten older, my views on this have changed a lot.

I do believe that Blaine is the only one whom Kurt has had deep and meaningful sex, but Kurt having other sexual relationships and encounters is not at all a bad thing -- and can be quite healthy in his understanding of how relationships, and his own sexuality, work. Now, I’d like to make clear that it’s fine whether you’ve had sex with a hundred people, or if you’ve had sex with no one -- your worth is not valued by the amount (or lack) of sexual partners you’ve had. But what I am saying is that there’s nothing wrong with Kurt having other sexual partners, nor does it detract from the meaningfulness that finds in having sex with Blaine.

So, let’s talk a second about Previously Unaired Christmas (yes, I know, I’d rather not, either, but it does have some valuable insight). Kurt, in an attempt to feel better, makes the decision to get a little tipsy, and throw caution to the wind -- and in the process decides to hook up with Cody. Now, pretending that he isn’t a skeevy conman who preys on minors, Kurt would have surely slept with Cody. And found... that casual sex can still feel good, but maybe it’s not for him because he does prefer the emotional connection his bond with Blaine brings.

I don’t think the encounter with Cody needed to be a bad one. (My huge objection to this whole thing in the episode is that Cody is a really gross guy taking advantage of minors, and for that I’m glad he didn’t get that far with Kurt.) I think as long as you have a healthy attitude towards sex and the idea of sex, that you can enjoy the pleasure of it even if it isn’t as emotionally satisfying as having sex with someone you love deeply. And that’s okay! Say this did happen with Kurt -- it doesn’t undermine the fact that Kurt is very much still in love with Blaine.

FWIW - I did write a casual sexual relationship for Kurt in my fic With Every Broken Bone (set between seasons 5 and 6) for this reason -- so Kurt can have a positive sexual encounter who isn’t Blaine - where he comes out of it happy to have had the experience, but still very much in love with Blaine.

Moving on... let’s talk about Adam! I’ve done a lot of talk about Adam, tbh, (you can find it in my meta tag!) so I’ll probably keep this short. I think if Kurt was to sleep with Adam, it’d be after Boys and Girls on Film, after they go on that date. I don’t think Kurt was there yet before, but there’s a definite possibility that after they see their movie, things progress. But, as with the Cody example, I can easily see Kurt sleeping with Adam, and it not being bad, but not being great either, so he decides he’d rather sleep with his boyfriend pillow, Bruce instead of Adam (which, let’s be honest, is kinda funny).

I do like the idea of Kurt sleeping with Adam -- because it gives him more experience, but also because it gives him another change to realize how valuable his relationship with Blaine is -- because it allows him to have something to compare to.

Let’s talk about Walter... Now, I think the show goes out of its way to paint them as nonsexual -- mostly because that relationship keeps getting compared to Blaine’s very sexual relationship with Karofsky as a really chaste thing.

But I’ve warmed considerably to the idea that Kurt slept with Walter. So, here’s my thing -- at this point in his life, Kurt has a very different relationship with sex than when he did a few years earlier. He and Blaine have now had a ton of sex. Kurt knows what he likes and what he doesn’t, and we know that he really enjoys sex (and is very grupmy when he doesn’t get it). I can see Kurt going into the thing with Walter being well aware that he just wants to have sex with an attractive older man and it doesn’t mean much other than feeling good.

And that’s okay! Because Kurt knows he can easily walk away from it once Blaine becomes available again. As Brittany has told him -- he shouldn’t just put his life on hold just because he’s waiting for he and Blaine to get back together, and part of his life is sex. So, yeah, I can see him enjoying a casual, sexual relationship with Walter while waiting to get back with Blaine.

So, those are my thoughts! My line of thinking, and maybe it’s just age that’s gotten me here, is that there’s no shame whatever your sexual history might be. I do agree with Burt’s sentiment that you shouldn’t throw yourself around as a way to please other people, because it’s expected of you, or because you feel that’s the only way to receive love (Blaine tried that -- it didn’t work). But having a healthy relationship with sex and your own sexual identity is a good thing!

Whether you’re like Mercedes and want to only have sex with someone you’re going to marry, or whether you’re like Brittany and have fun having sex with everyone -- as long as you’re being safe, educated, and in a consenting situation, then what ever your sexual encounters are is fine! I personally like the idea of Kurt exploring his sexual identity with other people because it helps inform his decision that Blaine is ultimately the person he wants to be with. But the text is open, and if you interpret it differently, that’s cool, too. :)

#that's how s.o. sees it #kurt sex meta #it's interesting to me that we don't have these kind of conversations around Blaine -- I wonder why that is #hmmm #Anonymous

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wrestlingisfake · 4 years ago

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Double or Nothing preview

Chris Jericho & Sammy Guevara & Santana & Ortiz & Jake Hager vs. MJF & Dax Harwood & Cash Wheeler & Shawn Spears & Wardlow - This is a "Stadium Stampede" match, so the contest will start in a wrestling ring set up on the 50-yard line of TIAA Bank Field. There are no disqualifications and falls count anywhere, so basically both teams can brawl all over the stadium until one guy scores a pin or submission on someone from the other team. If the Pinnacle (MJF's team) wins, then Jericho's Inner Circle will be forced to disband forever.

The Jericho/MJF rivalry has been brewing since the fall of 2019, when the subject of MJF joining the Inner Circle was broached. MJF (and Wardlow) finally joined up a year later, but it was all a plot to destroy the group from within to make way for the Pinnacle. The original five members of the Inner Circle stayed together and collectively turned babyface. The Pinnacle defeated the Inner Circle in a "blood & guts" cage match, where Jericho suffered a real dislocation in his elbow, but the Inner Circle demanded another chance to settle the score. So MJF challenged them to this match, knowing that Jericho's squad lost the first Stadium Stampede last year.

The first stadium match worked because they took full advantage of the format to do a lot of wacky comedy and absurd brawling spots. I don't think these teams can replicate that here, and really shouldn't try. They'll be better off focusing on the brutality of this blood feud and the dangers of an unfamiliar environment. Last year's match was all about finding new things to jump off of that nobody ever used in a wrestling match before. This one should be about finding new ways to hurt people.

I can't see the Inner Circle actually breaking up here, because there's a lot more left for them to do. In theory you could do it and just have Jericho keep targeting MJF all on his own. But they also still need to do Santana & Ortiz vs. Harwood & Wheeler, and Guevara vs. Spears, and I'd even be up for Hager vs. Wardlow. So it makes more sense to just give the Inner Circle the win here, although I can't deny that it's possible they could surprise me.

Kenny Omega vs. PAC vs. Orange Cassidy - This is a three-way match for Omega's AEW men's world championship, so the first man to score a fall on either opponent wins the match and the title. Omega's other championships--the Impact world title and AAA mega title--are not at stake.

As far as I can tell this match was always supposed to be a three-way. A Pac vs. Cassidy match on May 12 was set to decide Omega's next challenger and booked to go a time-limit draw. Omega would then argue that neither man won a title match, only to be overruled and have to face both of them, in a bit we've seen a million times. However, in the match Orange got legit knocked out. So instead of just declaring Pac the winner and sole challenger, which would make more sense anyway, they had to do some wacky hijinx to get back on the stupid track to their stupid draw to do the stupid trope for a stupid three-way.

So yeah, I'm not thrilled with this match, because nothing about it is more interesting to me than if the May 12 match had a winner and this match was one-on-one. Orange just beating Pac to earn the biggest match of his career would have been cool. Orange losing to Pac, so that it takes longer for him to prove he belongs in the main event, would have been cool. But a three-way just says to me "we don't think either of these challengers is a credible draw on their own, and you won't either after they both lose at the same time." Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if WWE hadn't run this sort of thing into the ground, but they did.

Anyway, Omega probably steals a pin from Orange, and the announcers all squabble with Don Callis for 25 minutes. I would really like to see this Omega heel run actually start going somewhere.

Matt Jackson & Nick Jackson vs. Jon Moxley & Eddie Kingston - The Young Bucks (Matt and Nick) are defending the AEW tag team title. The Moxley-Kingston alliance came about when Eddie set aside their differences to rescue Mox from the exploding ring on March 7. But the ring didn't explode, so both of them wanted to beat up Kenny Omega for embarrassing them. But they couldn't get at Omega becaue his faction kept getting in the way, and then the Bucks turned on Moxley to join Omega's faction. So Moxley and Kingston started targeting the Bucks, and by the time they stole the Bucks' fancy designer sneakers we had a title match.

I think I actually find the Bucks less irritating as heels than as babyfaces. When they're bad guys, they spend half of their time being all insider-y, like "WOW THAT SURE WAS AN EVIL THING WE JUST DID, THAT SURE WILL GET SOME 'HEEL' 'HEAT' FROM THE 'MARKS' LOL." But when they're good guys, they devote that time to being all "WOW THIS SURE WOULD BE A GOOD OPPORTUNITY FOR A 'HEEL' 'TURN' BUT WE'RE NOT GOING TO DO IT YET YOU 'MARKS' LOL." At least now they're supposed to be annoying.

The biggest missing piece in the Bucks' current heel run has been a team that won't take their crap and just punches each of them in the mouth. So Moxley and Kingston are really the perfect opponents for them right now. Like, I really buy that the Bucks have bitten off more than they can chew here. But I also believe that Mox and Eddie's deathmathch powers won't save them if they get cold spray in their eyes. So it averages out to an even fight, which I like.

I wouldn't book the Bucks to drop the title at this particular time, but I can see where it'd be hot for Moxley and Kingston to cement their bond as a team and get a short title run to set up a rematch.

Hikaru Shida vs. Britt Baker - Baker is challenging for the AEW women's world title, which Shida has held for just over a year. It's been a tough run for Shida, being booked as a dominant champion in an empty building, while Baker got all the glory of getting built up as a cult favorite heel. The fandom is impatient for a title change, and specifically for Baker to get the belt. I knew all along that we'd get here eventually, and the long wait would build it up, but it still feels hotter than I expected.

I kind of want to consider the possibility of Shida surprising everyone by retaining. But I think fans would be genuinely pissed if that happened, after waiting so long to see Baker's "coronation." So this is definitely one match where the "predictable" outcome is the right one. Baker should win the title and feud with all the faces she clobbered to get here for the next year. Shida should have to climb her way up to a big rematch down the line.

Sting & Darby Allin vs. Scorpio Sky & Ethan Page - Sky and Page sort of got thrown together because they both have the same "bellyache about not getting opportunities" gimmick. To that end, they both targeted Darby Allin, but instead of challenging him for the TNT championship they caused him to lose it to Miro. So now they're going to get their asses beat by Darby and his buddy Sting, while Miro gets a big PPV title match. You guys might want to review your strategy.

When Sting joined AEW with the intent to work matches, I think everybody assumed he'd just do "cinematic" matches like the pre-taped brawl on the March 7 show. However, AEW went out of their way to say this will be a normal tag team match in the arena, live in front of the fans. It'll be his first "real" match since September 20, 2015, when a bad bump forced him to retire. I sure hope they know what they're doing.

It's conceivable that Page and Sky will get the win, but it makes more sense to me for Allin to get the momentum on his way to rematch with Miro. Also, I think they'll want to give the live crowd a feel-good moment with Sting getting his hand raised.

Miro vs. Lance Archer - Miro won the TNT championship from Darby Allin a couple of weeks ago, and now Allin's busy with Pafge and Sky so that clears the way for Archer to step up and demand a shot. I felt like neither of these guys got their full due in WWE/NJPW, so it's especially rewarding to see them both get pushed in AEW and then beat the crap out of each other in a MEAN GUY MATCH~!

The money is in building to a Miro vs. Allin rematch for the title, so I don't think Archer is winning the belt and I sure don't think Miro is losing it this early. So this isn't about who'll win so much as it's about BIG MEATY MEN...SLAPPING MEAT.

Cody Rhodes vs. Anthony Ogogo - Ogogo won the bronze medal for middleweight boxing in the 2012 Olympics, but of late he's been training at the wrestling school started by Cody Rhodes and QT Marshall. Then QT turned on Cody, taking several students with him to form a faction called "The Factory." Cody got revenge on Marshall, but Ogogo hit Cody with his deadly body blow. Cody can out-wrestle Ogogo, but it won't matter if Ogogo lands that one punch again.

That's what the story of the match actually is. For some reason, Cody thinks it has to do with whether the United States sucks or rules. Basically, this is the same time of year that the Great American Bash would be held, and Cody wants to take up his dad's "The American Dream" moniker for one night weekend only, so that's how he's justifying it. So yeah.

Cody's storylines seem to operate in a parallel universe from the rest of AEW, but if you go along with that and buy what he's selling, it works. I can't decide if it's more important to deliver the happy ending for the white-meat babyface or to put heat on the up-and-coming future star. It probably depends on whether Ogogo's ready for a sustained push, and we won't know that until we see how he performs in this match.

Hangman Page vs. Brian Cage - This match actually relates to the company's rankings, in that Page was the #1 contender until a loss to Cage knocked him down a peg. So the inevitable rise of Page to complete his story arc by challenging his ex-partner for the world title can't proceed becaue Brian Cage is in the way. That's enough to get me motivated.

Cage has been lowkey teasing a face turn since he and Ricky Starks lost to Sting and Darby Allin. That's mainly important because Page is playing into that, suggesting he expected more integrity from Cage than the rest of Team Taz and daring him not to bring his goons to the match. It feels natural for Cage to lose this match because he refuses to accept help from his heel allies, who then turn on him for doing the right thing. Then again, Cage could just win to send Page spiraling further into despair and drag that issue out a while longer. But I really hope we're done with that.

21-man Casino Battle Royale - This is a gauntlet battle royale with timed entry, sort of like WWE's Royal Rumble, but five wrestlers start the match and every three minutes another five enter, until the 21st man enters alone. Once a wrestler enters the match, he can be eliminated at any time by exiting the ring over the top rope and landing on the floor. The match can only end once everyone has entered, and all but one is eliminated; the last man in the ring wins the match and a future world title shot.

Twenty of the 21 participants have been announced: Anthony Bowens, The Blade, Brian Pillman Jr., Christian Cage, Colt Cabana, Dustin Rhodes, Evil Uno, Griff Garrison, Isiah Kassidy, Jungle Boy, Lee Johnson, Marq Quen, Matt Hardy, Matt Sydal, Max Caster, Nick Comoroto, Penta El 0M, Powerhouse Hobbs, Preston Vance, and QT Marshall. The final participant hasn't been named; I'm guessing he'll just happen to enter last as luck #21.

A lot of AEW's factions are represented in this match, but the Hardy Family Office stands out for getting four of their guys (Blade, Hardy, Quen, and Kassidy) in this thing. I'm interested to see if that plays into the story of the match. But the heavy favorites have to be Christian Cage (a big acquisition that is already on track for a title match later this year) and whoever the mystery man is. Of course, last year's surprise entrant was Matt Sydal, so don't assume this one is going to be a huge deal.

Serena Deeb vs. Riho - Deeb is defending the NWA women's world championship on the pre-show. We haven't seen a lot of either of these women lately, because Deeb was out with an injury and Riho's international travel has been severely limited by the pandemic. (The NWA itself has also been out of commission for months, but they're back and probably anxious to book the winner of this match on one of their shows.)

So this match feels like it came out of nowhere, but it still manages to feel important. I mean, Riho ought to be the favorite, but doing a title change with another group's belt is no small thing. I'm really not sure what's going to happen, which is more buzz than I usually get for a pre-show match.

#aew #double or nothing #the inner circle #the pinnacle #kenny omega #orange cassidy #pac

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sweet-curried-powder · 5 years ago

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Happy Birthday, Edward!

Technically, Edward’s birthday isn’t until tomorrow, but I was too damn excited!!

I really wanted to do something special for Edward’s birthday, so I thought I’d write him a little something to celebrate!

There’s also some self-indulgent Chredwis in here, because there isn’t enough of that out there.

Characters: Edward Quinton, Chris Jackson, Drew and Nevin Jovel, Isaac Beamer, Ell Fisher

Word count: 2,164

Warnings: Swearing

The boys belong to @onebizarrekai, Ell belongs to me, and the picture was drawn by my good friend @oakskull!

Fic is under the cut!

Happy birthday, Edward!

***

Chris was ten seconds away from a fucking panic attack. He was pacing back and forth, muttering to himself, finishing off his fourth chocolate bar in the span of ten minutes.

“Okay, so Ell’s baking the cake, Nevin’s cooking other stuff, Drew’s finishing up the playlist for the party…wait, what about the decorations? OH GOD, ARE THE DECORATIONS DONE?! THIS PARTY’S GONNA SUCK ASS IF THERE ISN’T ANY DECORA-”

“Calm your tits, man!” Isaac sighed, walking in the room with a box of handmade decorations. He put them down and held up a banner that said, ‘Happy Birthday, King Edward Quinton!’ There were crowns drawn on it with shiny markers, and it was covered in rhinestones and glitter. “Also gonna toot my own horn and say it’s some of my best work.”

“Oh, thank Kai,” Chris sighed, relaxing. “...Why is it so shiny, though?”

“It’s Edward’s birthday. Everyone knows that your birthday is the one day per year that you get to feel important!” Isaac grinned. “Plus I wanted to use a ton of glitter and rhinestones.”

“Isaac, honey, I love you, but how much did you even USE?” Drew cried, squinting at the banner and shielding his eyes.

“You remember when I went to the arts and crafts store with the five hundred dollars Ell gave me?”

“Yeah?”

“Two hundred and fifty dollars were spent on anything that sparkled.”

Drew facepalmed.

“Well, the aesthetic does look pretty nice,” Chris nodded. “Ell, do me a favor and use your telekinesis to help hang all of these up.”

“Gotcha, Chris-cross!” Ell grinned, lifting her hand. The banner lifted in the air all on its own. She lifted the box up with her hands and wandered off to decorate the rest of Chris’s house.

“I can’t believe that your dad’s okay with holding Ed’s party here,” Isaac said. “I figured that he’d say no to this.”

“Oh, Dad doesn’t know,” Chris replied. “He’s been on a business trip since Monday. He won’t be back until late next week. As long as we clean everything up afterwards, he won’t suspect a thing.”

“Damn, you’re being a rebel, aren’t you?” Drew raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah, because this is important! Tomorrow is Ed’s big day!” Chris cried. “Tomorrow has to be absolutely perfect! Just like he is…”

“What was that last part?” Nevin asked, leaning closer to the monochromatic teenager.

“NOTHING!” Chris shouted, face going red, turning to Ell. “Ell, you’re gonna pick Ed up later so he can spend the night at your house, right? You know, to keep him busy so we can set up the finishing touches the next morning?”

“Uh-huh!” Ell gave Chris a thumbs up. “I’m gonna get up early and sneak over here to bake and decorate the cake. If all goes well, I should be back before Edward even wakes up.”

“Remind me why Edward’s gonna stay the night at Ell’s house, again?” Isaac asked. “He could’ve stayed at my place. We’re on pretty good terms.”

“Ell lives the furthest away from all of us,” Chris reminded him. “I’d have him stay at my house, but obviously we can’t, since we’re having the party here.”

“And we all know what Chris would do to Ed if they spent the night alone with each other,” Ell added.

“Jesus fucking Christ, guys! It’s not like that!” Chris cried. “We’d just play birthday games.”

“Birthday games?” Drew repeated.

“Yeah! Like Spin the Bottle, 7 Minutes in Heaven…”

“Chris, those aren’t birthday games,” Isaac facepalmed. “Those are the types of games that horny teenagers play at parties.”

“Hey, who can blame him? That’s how I would want to ring in MY birthday.” Ell’s face started to turn red. “But with somebody else, if you catch my drift…”

“Ell, stop it. You’re gonna bleed on the carpet.” Drew sighed, pulling out a tissue and handing it to Ell.

“Alright, everyone regroup here tomorrow morning at 8 am to put on the finishing touches! Ed’s… er, cronies will arrive a few hours before, and Ell and Ed should be here at noon! Don’t be late!”

Everyone said their goodbyes and went their separate ways, Isaac getting into his car, Drew and Nevin heading home, and Ell walking towards Ed’s house.

Chris shut the door behind him, sliding to the floor. He was nervous. So, so nervous. This party was one of the many surprises that he had for Edward, when tomorrow came.

“Tomorrow is going to be perfect,” Chris said aloud to the empty house. “It has to be. For Edward.”

********************************************

Edward’s cake looked amazing. It was several layers tall, and was frosted in different colors, and even had a tiny little Edward made of modeling chocolate and fondant.

“It’s not really one of my best creations, but Ed’ll like it,” Ell shrugged, wiping some frosting off of her cheek.

“Not one of your best?!” Chris cried. “This is the best birthday cake I’ve ever seen in my life! How did you even manage to make this in two hours?”

“I’ve been in a ton of baking competitions before. No biggie.” Ell blew some hair out of her face. “You gotta learn to work quickly in those sort of things.”

“Did you win a few of them?” Chris asked, intrigued.

“Nope. I won them all.” Ell grinned. “What did you think all those trophies in my living room came from?”

“Martial arts competitions,” Chris replied without hesitation.

“You’re not wrong, actually. I just keep those trophies in my room.” Ell checked the time. “I better go. Ed’s gonna wake up any minute now, and I need to keep the B-day boy distracted.”

“Alright,” Chris sighed. “I’ll call you if I need you to distract him for even longer.”

“That won’t happen.” Ell smiled at Chris, confident.

“How do you know?”

“Let me ask you a question.” Ell leaned in close to Chris. “Do you love Edward?”

Chris’s face went completely and totally red.

“Well, the same generic and platonic love I share with all of my friends and family-”

“No, you dumbass! I mean romantically! Sexually! That kind of love! Do you love Edward in that way?”

Chris balled his hands up into fists. He could lie in this situation, say that he didn’t, but Ell could read minds, and on top of that, she could instantly tell whether someone was lying or telling the truth, so denying that he loved Edward in this situation proved moot.

“Yes. I romantically and sexually love Edward,” Chris admitted, his cheeks warming.

“In that case, I believe that you’ve got this in the bag,” Ell smiled. “You won’t let anything go wrong for him. It’s his birthday, and you want to make it really special for him. You want to give him a birthday that he’ll never forget, in the best way possible. And you’ll succeed.”

“You really think so?”

“I don’t think so. I know so. Telekinetic’s intuition.” Ell tapped her head, looking like the guy from the “you can’t do” meme.

Chris chuckled. “Thanks, Ell. You’re the best.”

“You’re welcome. That’ll be thirty bucks.”

“WHAT?!”

“I’m kidding! God…”

******************************

Edward felt something sit down on his chest, followed by a heavenly smell. He opened his eyes, and Ell was sitting on him, a party horn in her mouth, holding a tray.

Ell blew on the horn, and she took it out of her mouth using her telekinesis. “Bon anniversaire! Feliz cumpleanos! Happy birthday!”

“You made me breakfast in bed? That’s awfully nice of you!” Edward grinned, taking the tray. “Ooh! French toast!”

“Not just any French toast!” Ell grinned. “It’s my grandmother’s special Nutella French toast! The recipe’s been in my family since the day Nutella was first sold in 1964!”

Edward took a bite of it, and his eyes lit up. “Holy shit, this tastes amazing! Nevin would probably kill for this recipe!”

“Yeah, I figured, which is why I haven’t told him about this,” Ell chuckled. “Do me a solid and keep this under wraps, will you?”

“It’s the least I can do,” Edward nodded, taking another bite. “Damn, I gotta say, you’re a really good cook.”

“Oh, thanks. I’m mostly self-taught.” Ell crossed her legs. “So, do you have any plans for today?”

“I usually go out for dinner on my birthday with my family, but I’m pretty much free until then,” Edward said. “I think I might go see Chris. My cronies probably got me something. Well, at least Cody, probably.”

“Oh, I bet you’ll see them soon,” Ell smiled. “Trust me.”

“Okay…” Edward took another bite. While he was distracted, Ell checked the time. She needed to keep Edward distracted for four hours. While some people would think that was impossible, she knew how to do it.

“You know, there’s this new store that opened up nearby that’s full of weird stuff,” Ell said, rubbing her thumb and forefinger together. “And I heard this rumor from one of the librarians that the place had some haunted items…”

“Haunted? As in, ghosts?” Edward leaned forward.

Ell nodded.

“Well, what are we waiting for?! LET’S GO!” Edward shoved the rest of the toast in his mouth and started taking his shirt off.

“HEY! Girl in the room!!” ********************************

“You want… that book?” Ell asked, raising an eyebrow as Edward held up a dusty, old book with some kind of symbol on the cover.

“Yep!” Edward grinned.

Ell breathed in deeply. “Dude, I know it’s your birthday, and I don’t mean to shoot you down on your special day, but I haven’t seen you pick up a book that wasn’t assigned to you for class.”

“Well, unlike you, I do all my recreational reading in the comfort of my own home, and only there,” Edward said, holding the book to his chest. “Besides, this book is just oozing with supernatural stuff. I can feel it in my bones.”

“Alright, if you say so,” Ell shrugged, giving the cashier several hundred dollar bills. “Keep the change, m’theydy.”

The cashier looked confused, but put the money in the register without complaint.

It was almost noon. Time for Ed to get so fucking surprised.

“Hey, Chris just texted me,” Ell said, looking at Edward with a gleam in her eyes. “He asked me to bring you over to his house. He has something for you.”

Edward’s cheeks dusted pink.

“Edward? You alright, buddy?” Ell asked.

“I-I’m fine!” Edward said rather quickly. “L-let’s hurry up.” Ell grinned, grabbed Edward’s hand, and fucking ran. For someone who was the shortest person in Foxfield High School, she was fast.

“Ell, slow down! Christ alive!” Edward cried, stumbling to catch up to his younger friend.

Ell finally screeched to a stop in front of Chris’s house.

“Chris said to just go on in,” Ell said, panting slightly. “I’m gonna go use the bathroom.” She dashed inside the house, opening and shutting the door quickly.

“Okay, everyone! He’s here!” Ell whispered.

“Okay everyone, go and hide!” Chris hissed. “When Ed comes in, count to three, and then jump out and yell, ‘Surprise’! Got that?”

Everyone nodded, scrambling to find a hiding spot. Ell used her powers to turn the lights off as she hid behind the couch next to the twins.

Edward opened the door, entering the dark house. “Hello? Chris?” He squinted, looking around the pitch-black house. “Are you home?”

Ell turned the lights back on, and everyone jumped out from their hiding spots.

“SURPRISE!” Everyone yelled. “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”

“W-what? A… a party?” Edward looked around the room in disbelief. “You guys set this all up?”

“Actually, it was Chris,” Isaac admitted, elbowing Chris in the side. “He got the idea in the first place. The rest of us helped in our own little ways. I made the decorations, if you can guess.”

Edward held back laughter as he looked at the extremely glittery banner that was hanging on a wall. He turned to Chris. “You planned all of this by yourself?”

Chris nodded, his face turning slightly pink. “It’s your birthday. I wanted to make it really special for you. I hope you like it.”

“Well, I don’t like it.”

Chris felt his heart sink. “O-oh. I’m-”

“I love it!”

Chris blinked. “Y-you do?”

“Yeah!” Edward grinned. “I can’t believe you went through the trouble of planning a huge surprise party just for me. It’s such a great birthday gift.”

Chris looked at Ell from the corner of his eye. She gave him a knowing look, and nodded, as if she was telling her to go for it. Chris took a deep breath.

“Well, can I give you another gift?” Chris asked.

“Sure! What is-”

Chris grabbed Edward, dipped him down, and gave him a long, deep, passionate kiss. Isaac and Nevin fucking sceamed, while everyone else stared in awe.

After thirty thrilling seconds, Chris separated from a blushing Edward.

“Happy birthday,” Chris grinned.

Edward stood there, frozen for a good while, before he smiled back, tears of joy streaming down his face.

“Thank you.”

#sugar's writing #ibvs #edward quinton #chris jackson #isaac beamer #drew jovel #nevin jovel #ell fisher #chredwis #happy birth to ed!!

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popculturebuffet · 4 years ago

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Jake Reviews Amphibia: Handy Anne and Fort in the Road

It’s finally here... the second time i’ve said that in three days but hey, Amphibia is back! After a years hiatus due to the show being shoved out in a month to get it on disney plus faster (Yet they STILL don’t have wonder over yonder so I can finally watch season 2. God damn. ), one of the best new shows of a year stuffed with them is back! I was excited about this one from the start. A great premise, a gravity falls pedegriee, and the wonderful Brenda Song, who I had a crush on when I was younger despite not really watching the first suite life that much, though I will admit what I saw was pretty decent and had a wonderful cast especially song and Phil Morris as Mr.Mosby.. it was just overshadowed by i’ts two leads being really sterotypical (the cool but dumb hustler and the stick in the mud nerd) and I was more of a nick middle schooler anyway so I barely touched it. Granted if I could go back in time and trade which shows I watched i’d trade it for Zoey 101 in a heartbeat, another show with awful leads but the rest of the main cast was really good concidentally.

Anyways I did watch more of on deck to kill time and absolutley hated it. Seroiulsy the show really sucks: Zack and Cody were turned into basically worse versions of Zack Morris and Ross Gellar, worse because while their just as douchey as those two, Mark Paul Gossler and David Schiwmer can actually act and Cole Sprouse could not yet. I do say yet since Cole Sprouse has grown because he wasn’t half bad in the one season of riverdale I watched. Riverdale, what happens when you have the entire writers room snort a line of coke and then tell them to write the most insane archie fanfiction they can and stitch the results together. Just with Archie alone from what i’ve seen in read he’s started a vigilante posse ala homer simpson, nearly joined hte mafia, been framed form murder, had the local cheerleaders do a number for him while he played prison football, escaped prison to hide in canda from both his former mafia boss whose also his girlfriend’s dad and the cult based on a DnD knockoff, got mauled by a bear and LIVED, and now is a superhero apparently. WHy I haven’t gone back to at the very least review this clusterfuck is a mystery. But the point is the twins were really terrible at the time, and if the fact Dylan’s only major role recently is in the sequel to After, that film based on self insert one direction fanfiction, which somehow got a sequel while Birds of Prey probably won’t because god really does hate me. So it was bad and she deserved better, got better with the social network but hadn’t done much i’d seen, so a new cartoon starting her in her elment and in a great show for once had me pumped. And.. my faith paid off. The show is beautifully animated, ahs a wonderfully morbid and fully fleshed out world, top notch voice acting (including BIll Farmer who is so unreconizable as hop pop I thought he was voiced by charlie addler), great jokes, action and storytelling. Just a slam dunk that left be jonesning for me. And now in one of the best weeks for animation in a while, more is here. I do mean that: 3/4 of disney’s major animated shows returning and close enough finally airing it’s a good time. When we last left our heroes: Hop Pop buired the box that brought anne there and lied to her about it which even a year later I think is a terrible decision.. one made for understandable reasons as he clearly knows something more about it than she does, but one that’s bound ot backfire whens he finds out her new grandpa lied to her and betrayed her. The plantars also spent the season preparing to leave wartwood. Soon after, Anne was forced to finally stand up to her manipulative, if to my utter shock still caring about her and possibly being into her? I mean it’s not like I haven’t seen the “villian whose overcompensating for a terrible past and likes manipualting people redeemed and ending up smooching the somewhat reckless but good hearted heroine” before.

Anyways Sasha ends up nearly falling off a giant tower, Anne tries to save her, with the rest of her new family pitching in, and Sasha, realizing just how terrible she’s been just.. let’s her self fall, only saved because Grime caught her. And just remembering that sequence god dman.. the fact they actually got the rights to lean on me for it really dosen’t help. But the day was saved and while Anne had a huge bundle of trauma, the family was ready to finally set out soon. And now a year later i’ts time. Now i’ve gotten all the personal stuff out of the way, let’s hop to it and see what the new season has to offer. Full review with spoilers under the cut!

Handy Anne

So the Plantars are finally setting off. We don’t touch on the Sasha thing much, just a quick bit at the begining to show that while Anne is insiting she’s fine it really traumatized her. I do like kids shows starting to show more that sometimes heroes just DON’T bounce back after something like this, especially young ones. While it’ isn’t nearly to the extent of Steven Universe spending an entire season having his lack of thearpy and unresolved issues slowly destroy him, it’s still nice to see. But the main thrust of the episode is it’s vacation time brother!

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Yup after a few episodes of build up last season with the valley clear, Hop Pop has bought a suprisingly nice and affordable wagon (As Polly excitedly explains someone died in it) so they can finally set out to hopefully find Anne a way home. Their going to Oregon! I mean To newtopia, the beating heart of Amphibia: a bustling metroplis built on knowledge where they can hopefully find a way to get Anne and friends back home, while Anne hopes to find Marcy. The rest of the kids are also excited just to get out of the valley for the first time. Everyone’s pumped.. but Anne starts to worry when she finds out Hop Pop has asked his friend Chuck, the “I grow tulips” guy from the bug ball episode last season who I forgot about but was reminded why I love him and am glad to have him back, to watch the house as given Amphibia is hard enough to surivive on a good day, let alone if your a stationary building. And Chuck dosen’t insprie confidence so Anne decides to fortify the house. And her reasoning.. is actually really sweet and shows how much she’s grown: Instead of like most times where her impulsivness is the reason shenanigans and life thretaning situations happen here.. she’s hit with the hard relization her new family is basically risking everything, their home, their farm, their chuck, to help her get home.

So Anne decides to armor up the house, getting a fuck ton of shovels and a ton of suplies from the blacksmith guy who suprisngly for once DOES have what she needs for her veggies, to the point his not backtracking weirds anne out, and gives her a tub of goo. This can only end well! Meanwile the rest of the family pack. Polly having maybe 3 possesions gets done quick, Hop Pop is being anal reteitive as always with his ascots (hilariously done and Bill Farmer really is the MVP of this series), while Sprig’s gone half insane just picking out which slingshot to take as he never left, which polly of course exploits. But things natrually go wrong as the goo creates veggie monsters the family fights (with sprig even calling fight time because this is normal to them at this point) the next mornign and then one colosus that destroys the house... and Anne’s anger and heartbreak over it .. awakens something. See something I hadn’t heard about and didn’t notice at the ebgining of the series was anne’s eyes flashing blue while fighting the mantis in the first episode. Many couldn’t tell if it was leading somewhere or just an animation error. Here though her eyes go bright blue in close up with it being clear this is part of her.. the question what is it and why? Just what power does she have now? And will it save the world or destroy it? Questions for later Anne saves the day, an admits she screwed up but Hop Pop is understanding: He’s touched by her actions but also explains their not just doing this for her: their with her all the way and any sacrifice is worth it. And I like that part of hop pop: while he can be overbearing, just see next episode.. he does genuinely mean well and has genuine wisdom, something they sometimes forget with grandparent characters in animation. He’s crotchety and a stick in the mud, but he’s still throughly nice and understanding and it shows here: He’s going to get his daughter back whatever it takes.. almost. Hop Pop calls on chuck who in a whilrwind of tools and tulips fixes the place.. and proves to be every bit the legend I thought him. He sells tulips and he’s great. We’ll miss you chuck. But as they get ready to leave Anne brings up the box and Hop Pop, remembering what he did, hastily says it’s better with their contacts. WHich again just seems short sided: while he is trying to protect her, especially since next episode confirms there was some sort of apocalypse once so odds are her being connected to it might not be the best, he can’t dance around her connection to it forever, and hiding the fact some apolcaypse was caused by it is only going to backfire when some vilian reveals it or anne finds it out for herself. Taking her to a place full of infomration where he’ll now have to work to hide the truth is just asking for this to backfire. Not bringing it is one thing, dangerous people could still get the box and use it for their own ends.. we’ve seen female newt sabertooth in the promos and we’ve met Grime. But not telling her is just setitng himself up for a big and deeserved fall soon. But with that settled our heroes set out!

Final Thoughts I: Overall this was a good start to the season: my one real complaint is the town didn’t really see them off or anything, so the large and loveable supporting cast is just.. absent unless the series returns to wartwood at some point and it would’ve been nice to see them once last time. Even star vs, as bad as season 3 was, knew we wouldn’t be seeing most of the earth cast for a whie and had marco have a meaningful sendoff before he left. But.. given how tight the phacing seems to be this season judging by episode titles alone, and they only had 11 minutes here. I do think it could’ve been in hte next episode, but it dosen’t ruin a decent, fun start to the season really rooted in character stuff. Not the series finest 11 minutes, but still really good and a good way to start us off.

Fort in the Road:

First off your welcome for that episode screencap. Now this one’s also simple, but ends up having a rather sizeable revelation nestled inside. The Plantars are going down the road and while the kids want to you know explore, see places, actually enjoy the trip especailly since Sprig and Polly have never been anywhere else before, Hop Pop, being hop pop, instead just wants them to sit and be quite and follow his rules. I mean it is hte grind but you can at least make it FUN for htem; Just look at this guy.

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It took an episode longer than I thought to refrence the trail to oregon given this season is about a wagon trip, but I’m glad to do it .. and do it again. I will fit pays to be an animal in here somewhere I swear it. WE’ve got time left in the road trip. Anyways this goes down terribly, though some rules like not posing dramatically as it smacks of hubris and never ends well. But understandably the kids are annoyed about it: Anne can’t even compallin because i’ts not in the rules. So naturally as Hop Pop should’ve seen coming at the first opprotuunity Anne fakes being cart sick and they run off to see a weird looking ruin with Hop Pop chasing them and leaving the cart to polly because that can’t end well but he’s on a short time. And this is where the season drops a 10 ton atomic bombshell. Anne being kinda magic in the last episode and it being fully part of things now is intresting and shocking.. but this is miles ahead of it and casts Hop Pop’s actions: Turns out whatever the clamamity box did set techniology in amphibia back to a little above the dark ages. I mean they have full light thanks to lightning bugs, but their still leagues behind.. but were once up to at least mid 2000′s levels of technology. The machine seen requires a disk to stop, but it’s still far beyond what I expcted from this world. Naturally Hop Pop shows up furious, then gets stuck on the assembly line with the kids deseprate to save him, with spirg ending up doing sow ith the rule book. Also we get Anne’s wonderful repsonse to Sprig asking what a disk is: “I don’t know! i’m from another dimension not the 90s!” They surivive, the factory blows up and the kids apologize and agree to go back to the boring way things have been going.. but Hop Pop thankfully realizes he’s been a bit overbearing and actually gives a good reason why: He’s never taken then out of the valley before and simply got overprotective. This is his family after all, all he has left of his kid and all he really has left beside Sylvia and the farm. It’s understandble he’d go a bit overboard. But Hop Pop decides to compromise a bit in a nice moment: while the impalment fields are obviously a non starter, he does get the kids ice cream (Anne even admits at this point she dosen’t pick the bugs out anymore), and they genuinely enjoy the trip while Sprig (in a hilarious bit of lampshadng as he does it repeadtly) wonders jsut what they were making.. and as I spoiled it was robots.. one of whom is now following them. Wether this means new doom or the plantars getting a new robot family member I don’t know i’m hoping for the latter. Everyone needs a vision in their life. Final thoughts II: While having a bit of an obvious conflict with an obvious resolution the character work combined with the MASSIVE plot bombshell really make this enjoyable and I hope to find out more about just what the hell happened and what these robots are for. Just another good solid episode and an excellent duo to start the season. Next week: Things take a turn for the western and Anne learns to hunt and more about the glow. And with the glow you need to grow to glow... until then i’ll likely have mor ereviews on this channel, I recently reveiwed all of season 1 of close enough if your curious, and until next time.. play us out Willie!

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I love what i’ve seen of this throughly stupid movie. Bye ya’ll!

#amphibia #handy anne #fort in the road #season 2 #brenda song #bill farmer #the suite life on deck #disney channel #disney xd #disney plus #anne boonchuy #hopidiah planter #sprig planter #polly planter #sasha #lord grime

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dafukdidiwatch · 5 years ago

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The Vice Principal

So I wanted to take the time to pose a little theory I had about The Vice Principal.

Chapter 5 of Paranatural did well to expand on the world that is Mayview, but we don’t have the full story on her. Just who is she, and how the heck did people even let children near her? Well, that’s what I want to prove.

I think she is a Monster.

We were already introduced to the idea of monsters before generally with the Cousinhood hunting them, but we got some more important lore in Chapter 5. Davey Jones as our first established Monster Character, and Agent Day’s presence providing information about them.

Monsters are “corrupted humans.” Due to Davey’s vampiric nature, we can safely assume that “corrupted humans” can range from anything partly-human to humans with non-spectral powers. This definition would apply to Werewolves, Zombies, and even Witches.

Patchworm and Davey use the term “The Witch” in reference to a person. Given that Patchwork and Zarei saw the Vice Principal just a few moments before, and how highly doubtful it is that Davey would refer to a second Witch, then that would mean that the Vice Principal is The Witch.

But what does that mean exactly?

Well for starters, witches are known for magic and spell-casting abilities. While the information of paranatural witches are lacking, it can be easily assumed that there is an ability difference between witches and Spectrals.

Zarei has a full blast of spectral energy here. Yet it doesn’t register with V.P. Even if she has forgotten about who Zarei is, or their history, there should have been more of a reaction to all that spectral energy.

Unless she couldn’t see it.

Cody couldn’t see Hijack. But Davey could. They are both vampires, but only Davey showed signs of his own spectral powers. Meaning that monsters can’t see ghosts and spectral powers, only Spectrals can. This means that Witch powers come from a separate source, something non-ghost or spirit related.

Furthermore, witches in lore were seen as maleficent and historically people did see witches as satanic, so it isn’t a stretch to assume that the Cousinhood would group them in with monsters as well, being “corrupted” by the powers of Satan.

Hilarious considering that Spender is currently housing Lucifer.

With V.P established as a witch, it makes this sentence a bit more hilarious in hindsight. She is starting the witchhunt, which is actually a Witch’s Hunt.

But she isn’t just any witch. Like how there are different types of Spectrals, there must be different types of Witches depending on what magic they are proficient at.

And she is a Bug Type Witch.

Davey doesn’t say “hands,” he says “legs.” As if The Witch doesn’t have any hands at all, only legs.

Now there are a lot of animals in the world that don’t have hands. Their limbs be called paws, claws, hooves, something to further define the limb. But bugs only have legs. A lot of legs.

Here we see Patchworm and Zarei are being cautious after running into V.P., calling it the “Spider’s Web.” Spiders would use webs to ensnare and trap their victims, something that we had seen happen before.

She used the string to control her weird child puppet to capture Jeff (who, ironically, was also Hijack’s puppet). It didn’t work, but she still somehow had enough string to contain Hijack for a little while.

If she was just a Spider Witch, I would have called her the Spider Witch from the beginning. But I didn’t, because she is similar to another insect.

Seriously! You can’t tell me that that nose is normal! There is nothing normal about it. It looks like an electrical cord was stretched out from her skin! And we know that that thing is real.

We saw her get a nosebleed from the game. That is an actual body part on her face. And it isn’t just her nose that has the similarity.

Yeah, pretty similar don’t you think? And look! Her arms behind her back even give off the illusion of wings.

In Patchworm’s mini-flashback, we see the silhouette of V.P. showed in darkness. The background is designed in spider webs. But under her arms the swirling pattern looks more like the design on wings than any web. So it isn’t just spider powers she is mimicking, but mosquito ones as well.

But what are these powers exactly? Well….

During this time of Hijack’s capture, he called her a “Hag” which is another term for witch. But, one with a bit more darker edge.

Hags are known for eating children.

Eating.

Children.

Mayview Middle School just became a huge buffet for this blood-sucker, though I don’t think it is blood she is drinking.

Before we get to that, let’s go over what we know of her history. Really nothing, but we know that Zarei has had history with her.

They fought one another. Zarai thought she had won a long time ago. And based on the grey shading in the last panel, they weren’t good memories. Especially if just seeing V.P.’s face made her terrified. But I want to focus back on the flashback panel. That is a child being trapped in V.P.’S Shadow, presumably Zarei’s. That plus her position in a school, it implies that she specifically targets children.

But if she intended to harm the school, she would have had opposition.

We know that Cody is the secret President of the Student Council. We know that he would accept killing Hijack for revenge of what he did to Jeff.

So then why would he allow V.P. at the school?

If she really is that big of a threat, he could have asked his dad to take her out.

He may be dangerous, but he is doting. If Cody asks, Davey would probably kill her without remorse. But Cody doesn’t. We know that Cody wouldn’t hesitate to do what he thinks is right. He banned his dad from school grounds. And yet it looks like that the V.P. is working for him. For what reason does Cody have to keep her?

Well….

There is a power struggle in Mayview. If there is one monster, then surely there must be more. Davey uses his skills to make sure that that struggle is balanced. Not one group is more powerful than another, and Davey is determined to keep it that way.

So maybe Cody is playing the game inside the school as well.

After Cody came in charge, the school drastically changed, but specifically note Collin’s story.

The V.P. only feeds on the students in detention. That is why she is in charge of capturing delinquents, that is how she is able to eat. And by only feeding on the detention children, the rest are spared from her appetite.

Also, note the string used to tie these two up like with Hijack. More Spider Silk.

She obviously can’t actually kill any students, that would raise too much suspicion on her. And she is a Major Player in this power balance if Davey knows of her existence. So she would probably use her magic to drain students of something nonphysical that wouldn’t kill them. Say….blood or their spirits?

Trapping them in detention and draining them for consumption still fits into the spider/mosquito abilities.

Of course, it also looks like that V.P. here is also really into the rules. So it could be a “cake and eat it too” scenario. Where V.P. gets to have the control she desires AND a way to eat/sustain herself.

So what does she want to do now? Well, Hijack certainly piqued her interest.

That is the look of realization of something that she had been looking for. And that looks like to be body snatching.

Look at the key word here. “THAT Easily.” V.P. is known for stealing bodies. If we continue the bug theme, there are a lot of parasitic insects that take over bodies or live in them as a host.

Parasites would infect bodies, so why not a witch infecting the student body?

This also makes Zarei’s confusion make sense.

If they did defeat her, how is she still standing? Well, she got another body. But it sounds like it would take a long process for it to happen.

After the game she does out she goes off to look for her “bigger fries”: Hijack. Jeff now is acting like Jeff again. She can’t see spectrals or ghosts, so she –like everyone else—is under the assumption that Hijack left and Jeff is back to normal.

This part is purely speculation since there isn’t much about what she is looking for. But my guess is that learning of Hijack’s existence, a being who can easily possess others, pushed her to try and get her act together for a new body-snatching ability.

But seeing how Davey and Cody got to Hijack first, and that Zarei knows of her return, I’m sure we are going to get a chapter dedicated to their three-way conflict soon enough.

#dafukblog #paranatural #pnat #pnchp6 #pn35 #pnat theory #pnat vice principal #mina zarei #hijack #pnat hijack #davey jones #cody jones #pnat davey jones #pnat cody jones #pnat spoilers #paranatural spoilers #paranatural theory

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thesportssoundoff · 6 years ago

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Holiday Shopping For The UFC’s Dozen Weight Classes

Joey

December 20th, 2018

The HAPPIEST of holidays to you and yours and I hope whatever you’re celebrating turns out to be the best one yet. This time of year isn’t every for everybody so if you’re a dude or lady out there struggling, remember that there’s always help to be found out there. If the holidays got ya down then don’t feel weak going out there getting yourself the help you need to make it through. We are, as they say, in this together and there are probably more folks out there just like you than ya realize. On the other hand, if you’re like me and this time of year is your favorite time of the year then here’s hoping these last five anticipatory days aren’t too gruesome for ya. Hopefully you did your shopping early enough to where it’s all about the waiting game and you aren’t that guy who waits to the last minute, runs into a CVS and grabs your mom or dad the first gift card that catches your eye on the rack.

MMA in 2018 was...strange and like most of combat sports, filled with plenty of unfulfilled wishes and genuinely cool moments overall. For all we gripe, I’d argue that ONE, Bellator, UFC, PFL and *insert regional organizaton here* delivered enough that we as fans should’ve been satisfied. For as much as we may gripe about the UFC, there’s zero doubt that they gave us plenty of good shit down the stretch of another long grueling schedule. With all of that laid bare, I wanted to do something different and instead of talking about what I want from MMA under my proverbial holiday tree, I’d spin it around and look at what each weight class in the UFC would be asking for. What does each weight class NEED for 2019?

Women's Strawweight

Big Gift: Finishes

The UFC's strawweight class has had it rough in 2018 which is weird because the talent level has never been higher. The hardcore journey into Asia has netted some new talent for the coffers from China and South Korea primarily plus Brazil churned out a collection of intriguing yet raw 115 lb fighters. The division also has seen a rise of domestic talents like Maycee Barber, Mackenzie Dern (She was BORN here so hush) and Tatiana Suarez all having fantastic years with proven names like Karolina K, Michelle Waterson, Jessica Andrade, Courtney Casey, Angela Hill and Tecia Torres stepping up. We even got a return from Cynthia Calvillo to further deepen what is a very talented and deep class. Even without Rose Namajunas, lost into early to mid 2019 due to neck problems, the division has seen plenty of damn good fights and intriguing names step up. The problem is that nobody in this division seemingly can finish fights. When news of the UFC's impending end of the flyweight division started circulating, statistics about finishes, punches thrown and knockdowns were floating around. Flyweights averaged the second lowest amount of finishes due to strikes, the second lowest percentage of finishes related to the number of strikes thrown per fight and finishes overall. The divisions behind flyweight in all those categories? Women's strawweight! There's a subculture of fans on twitter who make a killing taking the over on strawweight fights. At one point during the year, we had gone 12 straight strawweight fights without a finish. Deep into August, strawweight's finish per fight percentage was almost absurdly low. To the division's credit, the year has ended strong as we have had a 50% finish rate in all strawweight fights since UFC 228 in September. That doesn't make up for the total lack of finishes due to strikes but as a sub can be as fun as a TKO if we're being fair. The division has a wealth of talent, has seen some solid matchmaking and a decline in the importance of the grinder types who tend to slug their way through fifteen minute affairs. We're getting more athletes, more active fighters, less fighters who have a tendency to struggle in exchanges and just a better quality of MMA overall from the strawweights. Even accounting for talent taken for the 125 lb class, the health of this division seems strong. Just get folks finishing fights, keep giving us quality fights and get Rose back.

Stocking Stuffer: No weight cutting snafus

Flyweight

Big Gift: The Christmas Miracle

Simply put, the flyweight division needs a miracle. They got an extension on their life support with UFC on ESPN+ requiring a main event and TJ vs Cejudo getting bumped over. Those are temporary cures to a long term problem at flyweight; a problem that isn't going to be fixed with just one fight especially when MMA memories are fleeting. This division needs a new attitude, a new outlook and a new semblance of fan appreciation. You can be mad about Dana for a lot of things but he is 100% right when he says that he hopes the MMA media and their fans are as supportive of flyweight if it sticks around as they were when the Turk came around to claim the weight class. This division needs a Christmas miracle and the only person capable of delivering this is Henry Cejudo on January 19th. If Cejudo can't beat Dillsahw then this division probably does die a long painful drawn out death. Dillashaw would be a two time champion and the UFC would probably quietly nix the weight class rather than have yet another guy hogging up two belts. Cejudo remains the one man who can lengthen this division out. He has to beat Dillashaw and even that might just delay the inevitable. It has to be the sort of win that says that 125 lbs is only getting better with more talent inside of it than ever before. He has to basically blame Mighty Mouse for not taking the challenges the fans asked for and prove that flyweights aren't just smaller fighters but the best small fighters the UFC has.

Stocking Stuffer: A talker

Women's Flyweight

Big Gift: An identity

I suppose a hearty "Finally!" is owed to Valentina Shevchenko. After Nicco Montano struggled to heal up from a variety of injuries and ultimately missed weight, Valentina won her first ever UFC title with a decision win over Joanna Jedrzejczyk and got a jolt back into the UFC's floundering OTHER flyweight division. While she's not the champion that people want, she's the champion we got and Valentina is the sort of fighter who I imagine will have zero problems fighting anywhere 2-3 times a year in a division that could use a consistent champion. This division if anything needs stability and its own identity; something that can help clear the air of the stink that flyweight is just the scraps of 115 lbs and 135 lbs fighting out over a title nobody wanted but wound up getting in the name of inclusivity. It needs some sort of structure to be carved out the way that 115 lbs went through the growing pains of crafting its own hierarchy. It went from the TUF ladies to Joanna as this overpowering overconfident champion ruling over this division of young up and comers with something for everyone. There's no Ronda here to make everything relevant so the matchmaking and the women involved will need to do some heavy lifting. If flyweight turns into a "Who can Valentina 49-46 next?" then this division will be hopeless to ever go anywhere. It needs something that makes it stand out and fighters on the come up who can really present themselves differently.

Stocking Stuffer: Continued Depth

Bantamweight

Big Gift: Actual title fights

Stocking Stuffer: More Main Events

Over the past two years, we have had TWO bantamweight title fights. We had Cody vs TJ 1 in November of 2017 and Cody vs TJ 2 in August of 2018. This division has become such a tremendous hotbed for talent, earnest rivalries and developing unique fighters that it's a shame that the title picture has become so stagnant. Even if you were the kind of guy who got tired of Cruz vs Team Alpha Male, you gotta admit that was at least an angle that could reliably turn out consistent title fights. Cody vs TJ was obviously a financial hit but the counter argument is that the desire to stop and start and wait for the first fight then the rematch created what we have now. The division is clearly not helped by that plus we've also got a logjam now with TJ going down to 125 lbs to fight Cejudo in a super fight that's kinda not super at all given that IF ANYTHING the argument can be made that Cejudo is the guy more qualified within his own division as it pertains to having a reason FOR a super fight. TJ has an immediate #1 contender waiting on him in Moraes and while I believe he proved who the man was vs Raphael Assuncao in their last encounter, the fact remains they're tied up and a trilogy is a just fight. Not good or entertaining but a just fight. That doesn't even begin to account for fighters like Jimmie Rivera, Pedro Munhoz, Dominick Cruz, Aljamain Sterling and the winner of Petr Yan/Douglas Silva de Andrade as compelling title fights in the potentially near future. This division needs title fights next year; not one, not the promise of multiple ones but actual honest to goodness fresh compelling new title fights with fresh new challengers for TJ Dillashaw.

Women's Bantamweight

Big Gift: A Pulse

If not for the legacy crafted by Ronda, Holly and Miesha, we'd be saying the stuff we say about the 125 lb class for men in this division too. We don't need to re-litigate what ails the 135 lb class. Divisions one up and one down raided the middle class and took away reliable names like Jessica Eye, Holly Holm, Alexis Davis, Liz Carmouche and Valentina Shevchenko to name a few. Retirement and pregnancies took away the star power from the division, namely the likes of Ronda Rousey, Miesha Tate and Julianna Pena. What remains is a hollowed out husk of a division that has no signs of life left in it. Amanda Nunes vs Rocky Pennington is probably the worst title fight of 2018 and I suppose it spoke to the depth of this division that Pennington on a near two year layoff plus a broken leg was the right choice for the title fight. At the end of the day, 135 lbs just needs something. It needs some sort of a pulse and a reminder that it has its place in MMA. It needs someone to invest in it or some star to emerge from out of nowhere to step up and create some talent within it.

Stocking Stuffer: A TUF

Featherweight

Big Gift: Some divisional air freshener

Can great fights and great fighters get stale? 2017 began with Max Holloway and Jose Aldo on a collision course with Frankie Edgar on the outskirts looking in and a collection of proven quality fighters who had been beaten by some combination of the three as the filler. The "upside" was in guys like Yair Rodriguez, Renato Moicano and Brian Ortega. 2018 began with Max Holloway as the sole head of the division with Jose Aldo as the clear #2 fighter, Frankie Edgar on the outskirts looking in and a collection of proven quality fighters who had been beaten by some combination of the three as the filler. The "upside" guys were Renato Moicano, Brian Ortega and Zhabit Magomedsharipov. In 2019, we will enter the year with Max Holloway as the sole head of the division with Jose Aldo as the clear #2 fighter, Frankie Edgar on the outskirts looking in and a collection of proven quality fighters who had been beaten by some combination of the three as the filler. The likes of Cub Swanson, Jeremy Stephens, Ricardo Lamas, Darren Elkins and company continue to be the filler. The likes of Renato Moicano and Brian Ortega have graduated in value but I don't think either fighter at this moment can say they're above Jose Aldo (while Ortega can absolutely make a claim that he's the #3 guy). Most of these guys have all fought one another or fought someone who has fought Edgar, Aldo or Holloway. This division could use some freshening up and something new going on with it. Maybe that's Moicano taking the FINAL step up to replace Edgar or Aldo at the top of the charts or maybe Ortega is back in a title fight before 2019 ends. Maybe the likes of Alexander Volkanovski, Zhabit Magomedsharipov, Yair Rodriguez and can survive the gatekeeper's boss run that is the likes of Swanson, Edgar, Lamas and Elkins in some form or fashion. Hell maybe even guys like Michael Johnson and Chad Mendes can continue to be a vibrant little surprise, racking up some timely wins and preventing new challenges. This division is realistically the best division in MMA but if we end 2019 with the same old same old at the top then I'm going to have to call foul there.

Stocking Stuffer: Health and happiness for action fighters

Women's Featherweight

Big Gift: An investment

The UFC is building performance institutes all over the world and I think that's great. It's their money, spend it how ya wish on what you like. That said if the UFC wants this featherweight class to live beyond Cyborg skipping out, it may be time to put those PI's to their best uses. Even if people cry favoritism, use the UPI's to restock the shelves in WMMA. Let athletes in need of a home stop in there, train for free, board for free and then try to find them gyms you're comfortable with to continue their careers. There's no reason that women's hockey/basketball/softball/wrestling athletes aren't being tempted with continuing their athletic careers in the UFC. That requires an understanding of failure and the tacit knowledge that you may invest hundreds of thousands into people who may not make it. Invest in your product long term, realize you might sink a cost or two and reap the benefits over the long term. It CAN be done.

Stocking Stuffer: A drama free year out of Cyborg (or whoever your champ is)

Lightweight

Big Gift: Detangler

Any other division in the world with the likes of Khabib Nurmagomedov, Conor McGregor, Tony Ferguson, Dustin Poirier, Kevin Lee, Al Iaquinta, Paul Felder, James Vick, Justin Gaethje, Donald Cerrone, Anthony Pettis, David Teymur, Alexander Hernandez and countless others would be a pretty damn hot division and to its credit 155 lbs is pretty damn hot. Even if we can express disappointment in some of the ratings this division has drawn, the fights have been absolutely outstanding as a whole on the year. What this division really needs though is some detangler to help us figure out just what the hell we've got going on here. Is Khabib going to be out for a year? Is Conor? Will Ferguson fight ONLY for a title or will he be active again like in years past? Is Al Iaquinta really a top 5 LW? Can guys like Kevin Lee and James Vick bounce back from rough showings at the end of the year? We've got a loaded division but not a lot happening in large part due to the Khabib and Conor situation and also due to Ferguson and Poirier seemingly getting stuck in between fighting and not fighting for various reasons. This division deserves a bit better luck than that.

Stocking Stuffer: A 165 lbs division

Welterweight

Big Gift: The element of danger

I've sort of beaten this into the crowd to the point where it's lost effectiveness so I won't belabor the point much longer. 170 lbs needs somebody to finish a fight. It needs a title fight with actual buzz and not buzz about seeing who can race to the bottom first. This is the UFC's weirdest, wackiest division which is somewhat unfortunate given the history of 170 lbs as a whole.

Stocking Stuffer: A Renaissance run from an old horse

Middleweight

Big Gift: Continued youthful and exciting international imports

There's some life here! For once, middleweight has some life going on with it! After the 2014/2015 run where Weidman, Rockhold, Whittaker and a bunch of TUF guys stepped up and showed out, the division hit a lull until this year. We got some glory days runs out of the likes of Jacare and Chris Weidman, we had Yoel Romero fight two times a year like a mad man but we also had the likes of Israel Adesanya, Karl Roberson, Paulo Costa, Thiago Santos and Jared Cannonier mark their arrivals as forces to be reckoned with at 185 lbs. The Contenders Series gave us fighters like Kevin Holland, Ian Henisch and Edemen Shahbazyan. Fighters like Tom Breese and Darren Till realized that lopping off limbs to make 170 lbs was a bad idea. For the first time in the history of the UFC, we're going to get a middleweight title fight between two guys under the age of 30. Even if you account for the fact that Chris Weidman and Luke Rockhold are bound to leave the division soon, it doesn't actually feel like a death shot which is pretty amazing given 185's reliability on aging fighters to keep it afloat. What this division needs is really just more of the same. More fighters under 30 popping into the mix, less weathered proven mid tier gatekeepers being given opportunities over and over that they consistently come up short in. Keep building 185 lbs, man. We'll eventually have a serious division in short order.

Stocking Stuffer: One Jacare title fight

Light Heavyweight

Big Gift: Help

Help. SOMEBODY. Jesus christ, somebody help this god forsaken division. Anthony Smith and Thiago Santos are top 10 LHWs after a few fights! The only three really intriguing prospects are Johnny Walker, Dominick Reyes (who no longer feels like a prospect) and Aleksandr Rakic. This division needs help. It needs fresh new fighters, reinforcements from 185 lbs or just something. We're a win, a suspension and a bad sneeze from Gustafsson away from Shogun vs Jan Blachowicz as a title fight in 2019.

Stocking Stuffer: MULTIPLE Jon Jones fights

Heavyweight

Big Gift: The Same Old Same Old

Honestly I know there are folks who dislike the heavyweight division but let's be honest. This is a golden era for big doughy dudes doing big things. We've got old horses having renaissance years in Daniel Cormier. Alexei Olyenik and Junior Dos Santos. Derrick Lewis got to fight for a title! The European HW scene is popping with new guys springing up every other month seemingly. We got to see fighters like Arjan Bhullar and Tai Tuivasa get tested a little bit with some adversity. We might be finally getting some sort of ROI on guys like Justin Willis, Curtis Blaydes and Walt Harris. Francis Ngannou and Alistair Overeem both ended the year on the right side of the tracks. Despite our best reservations or concerns, Greg Hardy is coming and will step into the cage as literally the best athlete in HW division history. Even CAIN VELASQUEZ has apparently had the cobwebs blown off of him! The UFC heavyweight division is doing okay and everything will be alright. Just keep doing what you're doing, try to sign some more of these up and coming European heavies, be a bit more careful with the prospects you've got and let the division keep on keeping on. Long live Heavyweight MMA!

Stocking Stuffer: A semblance of an heir apparent or two

#MMA #Holidays #UFC #Fights

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astro-b-o-y-d · 7 years ago

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I finally got the designs for all the next gen kids done! And I even tweaked Richie’s a bit because I felt like it could be a lot better, and now it is :’D

In case anyone’s new and haven’t met them yet, here’s some descriptions:

Dhrumi and Dahlia are Max’s twins. He really wanted a child of his own, so after considering a few options, he chose to go to Nikki and ask her to be his surrogate (only surrogate; they are not together). She happily said yes and soon after, the twins were a thing. Dhrumi is the more adventurous and ‘get from point A to point B as quickly as possible because if you go fast, you see a lot more a lot quicker’ twin while Dahlia prefers to stop and smell the flowers. And identify them by their scientific names. And sometimes eat them. She really likes to put things in her mouth, so Max bought her that chew necklace around her neck.

Overall, the two of them really love nature and look forward to going to camp every summer with Dad, Grandpa David and Grandma Gwen. It’s very hard for the three of them not to show clear favoritism among the campers (not that Max ever tries not to; he’s going to make it clear his daughters are the best ones there). Dahlia always likes to sign up for Botany Camp, and is especially interested in the more dangerous plants. She has been rushed to the hospital several times because she keeps putting said plants in her mouth (she claims she’s trying to build up an immunity to some of them), but she’s tough and always pulls through. Now whether or not her father and grandparents will pull through after all the heart attacks that she puts them through with those plant stunts; that’s another story.

Dhrumi isn’t signed up for one camp in particular, but that’s her choice. She wants to be able to experience as many camps as she can over the summer, just like Dad did! Max...doesn’t have the heart to tell her, but he’s proud of her enthusiasm and is happy his girls have so much fun at the camp. He still thinks the place is a backwoods, rundown piece of shit, but........that backwoods, rundown piece of shit gave him a family so he can’t complain.

Richie is Nikki’s son, born after she was Max’s surrogate for the twins. Once she saw Max raising his own kids, she was like “....Well shit, I wanna do that parent thing too!” And after a unanimous decision between her, her girlfriend (Cody) and her wife (Natalia), Richie was born some time later. And it takes less than two seconds of being around him to know that he VERY MUCH takes after Nikki in personality. He’s very excitable, very bouncy, and it’s very hard for him to sit still for long periods of time. Naturally, Nikki is nothing but incredibly supportive of her son’s endless energy, though she does wish he wouldn’t stop forgetting his glasses whenever he runs off to do something. Glasses are expensive, you little booger, and you can’t explore everything in the world if you can’t see.

While Richie likes to tag along with Dhrumi in hopping from camp to camp, his main camp is Adventure Camp, which Nikki is HAPPY to lead. She’s also incredibly biased about her favorite camper. No counselor in the camp knows how to.....not do that, because their kid is so obviously the best one!

Annabelle is Neil and Harrison’s formally-foster now-adopted daughter. Neil had been considering becoming a foster parent for a while (And after Richie, Nikki was ‘no longer renting out cloning space’ so to speak, so that option was off the table). So he and Harrison got their foster parent licenses, and had a few kids come and go over a few years.

Then Annabelle showed up in their lives and they knew within a month after she moved in that they wanted to adopt her. She’s incredible shy and anxious, and a bit of a novice when it comes to magic (her specialty is potions and she keeps that backpack of hers full of brewing ingredients). In fact, magic’s what made her original parents disown her, when a failed spell caused her to accidentally light the kitchen curtains on fire. Needless to say, she had a bad streak of magical accidents that caused her to get kicked out of a lot of foster homes, to the point where she started hiding her abilities and practicing them in secret in the hopes that someone would actually keep her around for longer than two weeks.

Of course, that failed when Neil caught her practicing levitation spells one night and she broke down in tears, terrified that she was going to be sent to yet another family. But Neil (obviously having grown up a bit since his Camp Campbell days and furious obsession with proving magic’s not real) calls Harrison to her room and has him show her the kind of illusions he can do to calm her down and assure her that they aren’t going to get rid of her for having a gift like that.

And of course after hearing what happened to her, they adopt her within a week and she’s been with them ever since. She’s been a bit more willing to practice her magic around others again, though she’s still a little fearful and self-conscious about her gifts. But she’s surrounded by good people who love her and support her and over time, she’ll probably grow a lot more confident in time.

Obviously, she belongs to magic camp, though again, her specialty is Potions (which is a mix of science and magic) so she actually ends up creating her own little combination of the two camps and makes a whole new camp in the process. All the younger kids think she’s cool and Dahlia likes to bring her plants to use for her recipes while Dhrumi tends to bring her any animals/animal parts/bugs/etc she might need. Richie brings excitement and enthusiasm, which is.......honestly more than enough for her. She could use the confidence boosts and assurance that she is loved by others.

#Camp Camp #CampCamp #Dad Max: Fury Road #SOSO #My Art #Dahlia Gwendolyn Greenwood #Dhrumi Davida Greenwood #Haven't thought of last names for the other kids yet but #I'll tag them with their middle names #Richie Nicholas #Annabelle Ambrosia #I'll go back and retag when I have actual last names

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daleisgreat · 6 years ago

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Scott Hall: Living on a Razor’s Edge

After pondering over ideas and looking over my notes the last couple of days, I concluded I had no idea how to go about my entry for today’s blog that is for WWE’s 2016 BluRay release of Scott Hall: Living on a Razor’s Edge (trailer). I am presuming most people reading this probably are well aware of some of Scott Hall’s personal struggles throughout the years. WWE’s documentary on his life and career attempts to cover it all within 81 minutes. If you have not seen it yet, nor have that time to spare then before reading on I encourage you to at least check out ESPN’s much more condensed 18 minute mini-doc they did of Hall on a 2011 edition of E:60. That E:60 piece was where Hall first publicly revealed he inadvertently shot and killed a man during his job as a bouncer when he attempted to grab a gun away from a person who pulled a gun on him. Living on a Razor’s Edge opens with Hall revisiting the scene where it happened and him getting instantly emotional over the memories. Hall’s mother and brother are interviewed throughout and both mentioned how that day forever changed him. It is the first of many dark tales from Hall’s personal life that he reflects on.

From that hook of an opening scene the feature then transitions to Hall’s childhood where he reminisces growing up as a military kid and always being on the move. Hall recalls idolizing Dusty Rhodes in the Florida territory is what convinced him to go into wrestling. I saw Hall interviewed in a few other nWo and Kliq retrospectives released by WWE over the years, but in those I believe he never touches on his early days in the business debuting in the Kansas territory as part of the American Starship tag team and to more success as a tag team champ with Curt Henning in the AWA. Seeing that vintage footage accompanied with Hall elucidating about how Dusty got him his first pair of wrestling boots and how he refused to be AWA champ because he realized the promotion was a sinking ship he wanted to abandon were fun new anecdotes from Hall I never heard before. Seeing Hall talk about his meager success as the Diamond Studd in WCW was another interesting early facet of his career. DDP, Kevin Nash, Shawn Michaels and Vince McMahon were all interviewed here about their early memories of Hall and provide extra quotes on why this made Hall more determined to land a job in WWE. Hearing Hall and Vince remember the days of coming up with the Razor Ramon character and brainstorming the ideas of the iconic vignettes introducing Razor to the WWE in 1992 are more noteworthy highlights from the interviews here.

Hall goes into detail of his early WWE years with some key angles such as the first televised WWE ladder match at Wrestlemania 10 and when 1-2-3 Kid got the shocking upset in ’93 that is still an iconic memory of RAW all these years later (it even made WWE’s official list of Top 25 RAW Moments for RAW’s 25th anniversary earlier this year). One early highlight from the Razor run was when Hall discusses appearing on Jerry Springer for a surprise visit to children with AIDS where Hall spontaneously gives his Intercontinental Title to the kids because it felt like the right thing to do and hearing Hall and Springer interviewed here remember that moment along with the footage is pretty powerful stuff. From here the doc then jumps to the controversial time when Hall and Nash left WWE in 1996. Both of them and McMahon break down how it all came to pass, and hearing them all give their side of the story is still fascinating to this day. I say that because I still recall being a huge WWF kid at that time and getting crushed upon hearing both guys were leaving the company to go to the ‘competition.’ Yes, Hall makes sure to address the introduction of the fake Razor and Diesel later on in 1996 too. A part of me wishes WWE would have done a separate deep dive on Hall’s four year run as Razor Ramon. There were so many memorable feuds they did not address in the doc. I would have loved to hear Hall recall feuding with Jeff Jarrett, Diesel and Goldust for the Intercontinental title. Also from watching the bonus matches it brought back memories of how Hall was a master of ring psychology and he perfected the gradual build of a match where there were several times where fans were quiet at the beginning to becoming a hot crowd by the match’s final moments. HBK and Nash both have some interesting quotes about Hall’s wrestling IQ and how they helped him during those old early-to-mid90s years.

WWE has already done a couple nWo biographies so I was curious to how they would cover his career in WCW on Hall’s solo documentary. I like how they went about it as they had Nash, Hall and Waltman all interviewed and they give the abbreviated version of their nWo heydays reigning supreme over the Monday night rating wars. Hall touches on a couple of things he introduced to his solo-act in WCW such as the pre-match ‘survey’ and how Rocky II was the impetus for ‘Hey, Yo.’ Hall and Eric Bishoff both recount the art-imitates-life storyline where WCW brought Hall’s behind-the-scenes drinking problems as a on-screen WCW storyline and hearing Bishoff regret that booking decision is another poignant scene in this feature. Hall essentially admits to those dark days carrying over to his return to the WWE in 2002 and why it did not last that long. There is no mention of Hall’s handful of brief TNA/Impact stints, which is probably for the best. Growing up as a wrestling fan and keeping up with Hall’s struggles over the years made the final chapters of the doc especially powerful. There is a montage of the many arrests and controversies that Hall made news in from 2002-2012. Nash has some key details of Hall at his lowest moments and how he stuck by his side that stuck with me. Triple H, Michaels, and Bishoff also all chime in here about these hard years for Hall. Footage is shown of the 2011 independent wrestling show were Hall appeared heavily intoxicated and hearing Nash, Hunter and Hall all comment on it being a new low for Hall brought back many sad memories. This all was happening during the 2000s when a rapid number of early adult-to-middle aged wrestler deaths were transpiring and I recall wondering countless times during those years how in the heck Scott Hall was still alive.

Thankfully, there is redemption for Hall and it is tastefully covered here where Jake Roberts and DDP are interviewed about taking Scott Hall into DDP’s rehabilitation house and helped Hall kick his addictions. Hearing them and Hall reflect on this was a much needed and gratifying feel-good moment that culminates with Hall being interviewed again at that club where the shooting went down where he owns the guilt he carried all those years in the defining moment of this feature. The doc then winds down with how Hall got inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame and now helps coaches at the WWE Performance Center and how he helped got his son Cody started in the business too. Living on a Razor’s Edge is easily one of the best of documentaries WWE has made. There are many gaps they could have filled in on his in-ring career but it feels wrong to ask for that given what Hall has went through and recovered from in his personal life. Since this is a home video release, WWE gave it their usual jam-packed assortment of bonus features with eight minutes of deleted scenes, the entirety of the several introductory Razor Ramon introductory vignettes and 27 matches, five of which that are exclusive to the BluRay.

Deletes scenes highlights have Nash detesting the mask he used for his ‘Oz’ character in WCW, Hall’s memories of wrestling his buddy, Justin Credible on a ECW PPV in 2000 and Michaels recounting Hall giving Nash some great in-ring advice he promptly followed. I have only seen a handful of Hall’s pre-WWF matches before this BluRay so seeing several matches from those days and how fast he evolved in the ring was a treat. I did not know Hall already had the Razor’s Edge perfected as the Diamond Death Drop in WCW. Since that is not addressed in the doc, I will link you to this clip instead where Hall reveals its origins. Other standout matches in the extras include the aforementioned stunning upset at the hands of the 1-2-3 Kid, his ’93 WWE Title match against Bret Hart, a ’93 Coliseum Video bout against Michaels I have long forgotten, his first IC title win over Rick Martel and his still-iconic ladder match against HBK at Wrestlemania X. From 1993 through most of 1995 I fell out of wrestling for a bit due to being on the losing end of sibling wars for control of the television and the only wrestling I had access to during that time was a videotape of SummerSlam ’94 one of my dad’s coworkers taped for me. Razor vs. Diesel on that show was one of my favorite matches for many years (along with the Owen/Bret cage match!), so to see that included in this compilation earns bonus points from me!

Hall’s nWo highlights here contain a bunch of matches that have hokey finishes or disappointing run-ins and the only WCW matches included here that stood out are the Outsiders first tag titles win over Harlem Heat and Hall having an awesome match against Sting for the WCW World Title at Uncensored ’98. Hall’s match against Austin at Wrestlemania X-8 holds up better than I recalled, and it features Hall taking the best Stone Cold Stunner ever. Of the five BluRay exclusive matches I give high nods to check out his SummerSlam ’93 match against Ted Dibiase and a ladder match I completely forgot about that saw Hall square off against Bam Bam Bigelow from a 1999 episode of Nitro. As you can tell by now I am giving Scott Hall: Living on a Razor’s Edge the highest of recommendations. Aside from one of the best documentaries WWE Home Video has produced, it has a ton of bonus matches that proves how Hall was one of the best workers of the ‘90s. Hall’s personal story is one that is a must-see that shows the highest highs and the lowest lows one can achieve, and to see Hall escape from that dark tunnel is a heartwarming tale well worth the viewing for any wrestling fan. Past Wrestling Blogs Best of WCW Clash of Champions Best of WCW Monday Nitro Volume 2 Best of WCW Monday Nitro Volume 3 Biggest Knuckleheads Bobby The Brain Heenan Daniel Bryan: Just Say Yes Yes Yes DDP: Positively Living Dusty Rhodes WWE Network Specials ECW Unreleased: Vol 1 ECW Unreleased: Vol 2 ECW Unreleased: Vol 3 Eric Bishoff: Wrestlings Most Controversial Figure For All Mankind Goldberg: The Ultimate Collection Impact Wresting Presents: Best of Hulk Hogan Its Good to Be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story The Kliq Rules Ladies and Gentlemen My Name is Paul Heyman Legends of Mid South Wrestling Macho Man: The Randy Savage Story Memphis Heat NXT Greatest Matches Vol 1 OMG Vol 2: Top 50 Incidents in WCW History OMG Vol 3: Top 50 Incidents in ECW History Owen: Hart of Gold RoH Supercard of Honor 2010-Present ScoobyDoo Wrestlemania Mystery Sting: Into the Light Straight Outta Dudley-ville: Legacy of the Dudley Boyz Straight to the Top: Money in the Bank Anthology Superstar Collection: Zach Ryder TNA Lockdown 2005-2016 Top 50 Superstars of All Time Tough Enough: Million Dollar Season True Giants Ultimate Fan Pack: Roman Reigns Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe War Games: WCWs Most Notorious Matches Warrior Week on WWE Network Wrestlemania 3: Championship Edition Wrestlemania 28-Present The Wrestler (2008) Wrestling Road Diaries Too Wrestling Road Diaries Three: Funny Equals Money Wrestlings Greatest Factions WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2015 WWE Network Original Specials Second Half 2015 WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2016 WWE Network Original Specials Second Half 2016 WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2017

#Scott Hall #Wrestling #razor ramon #WWE #wcw #nwo #curt hennig #Diamond Dallas Page #Kevin Nash #Sean Waltman #Shawn Michaels #eric bischoff #Vince McMahon

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kariachi · 7 years ago

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For a moment I wondered why Kevin’s sections are always longer than Argit’s in this au, then I remembered that Argit’s generally have fewer people involved and less going on...

Chapter 6, now with fashion and family time.

They were a few months out from the big day and Argit was done. The constant back and forth that came with trying to plan a wedding he’d love without actually involving him in the planning, he could handle. The feeling like he was arguing with a stranger third-hand and from the other side of the galaxy, he could handle. But when his father had sent someone in to get his measurements so new clothes could be made?

As someone who’d been making his own for what felt like forever he was just not having it.

He’d finally taken control of the situation- dumping the bureaucratic work on his father’s desk with no fanfare, foisting the final stages of wedding planning onto Psyphon, cutting his siblings’ snickers down by assigning them the most menial work he could think of at the time- and given himself a job he actually enjoyed. Ever since he’d hardly left his rooms, locked away with all the fabric, sewing supplies, and inspiring pieces he could dream of. It was relaxing work, the most troubling bit was deciding what pattern to go for in the deep greys and purples he’d settled on, and was mostly working to keep his mind off just how fast time was going.

The more time he spent considering it the more nervous he got, the more he ate, the more grateful he was that he’d already adjusted his patterns to a few sizes larger than normal.

It was becoming more and more clear with time that he had no idea what he was doing or what to expect. Not only that, but that none of the people he’d have felt comfortable discussing this with had any idea either. He was going to be the first one married and the only person he knew who’d had truly serious relationships was his father, who wasn’t an option for obvious, ‘I have five kids by four women who skipped out’-shaped reasons. He didn’t know how to have a relationship, how to get to know someone, what was expected of him in a marriage. As time had gone on he’d found himself spending more and more of his free time looking up everything from Osmosians to humans to marriage advice to housing because apparently setting up a house together was a thing you were supposed to do maybe? Sorta? Kinda?

Anymore if he wasn’t working on his clothes (and his father’s clothes, and his siblings’ clothes, and Psyphon’s clothes-) he was probably on the ethernet going cross-eyed with his researching. Generally accompanied by at least one pie.

Pupating came with a lot of changes, mental and physical, ones that couldn’t be properly predicted for hybrids. There was endless variance there. Which meant not only that they hadn’t been able to do any planning involving Kevin’s looks before he broke free, but that as soon as he’d adjusted enough to the new body to stand and speak his family had converged on him like vultures on a dead buffalo.

“Dress or pants?”

“Whichever’s cool.”

“…we’ll get both made, you can choose on the day.”

Kevin was only really half paying attention to everything. There was a full-length mirror right there and while he wasn’t a vain man between dysphoria and oncoming maturity his adolescent mimicry had felt wrongwrongwrong. Not that things were perfect now by a long shot, but people kept having to drag him back into position as he twisted and turned to admire things like his mane and finally flat chest.

“Straight and relaxed, gyadin,” his gran said with a sharp tug on his mane and he immediately complied, drawing snickers from the rest of his little entourage.

“Yes, memu.” He felt as much as heard the pleased rumble she made as she returned to measuring the base of his tail.

“You know, if we can get this measuring done in time to make you clothes, you’re going to look wonderful. Just like your father.”

“He looks more like you,” his mother countered, fiddling with his hair same as she had been the last fifteen minutes, “Devin was narrower across, pretty much everything really.”

“He’s got Dad’s colors though,” Cody said. He’d been going through a thick pile of fabric swatches for the entire time he’d been there, occasionally whistling for the opinion of Vivi, sat on the floor across from him. Near as Kevin could tell she was trying to figure out some beadwork designs combining the maternal heritages she was part of and the paternal she hardly knew, and Cody was helping her as much as she was him. Finally, he held up swatches of rich blue and golden-yellow that stood in bold contrast to Kevin’s dark adult scales. “What do you think?”

“Gorgeous,” Kevin’s mother said before he could open his mouth. His grandmother got to her feet and smiled brightly down at the selection from over his shoulder.

“And fitting,” she said, turning her smile between him and Cody, “they’re a good enough match for some of your enku’s pack’s traditional colors.”

“So,” Kevin cut in, “I take it I don’t get a say in colors anymore?”

“No.”

“Some advice, little brother,” Cody said, smiling in bemusement, “just roll with it until you’re married, then blame everything on your husband. They can’t pull rank there.” Both older women gave him a critical look.

“Kafan, remind me to talk to Regina about double-checking with Mala?”

“Gladly.” Huffing, the old Osmosian turned Kevin to face her, looking him over. “Do you want some real married advice?” For a split second he wanted to say no, he was fine, but then remembered that he was going to be married in two months and had to lock his knees to stay up straight. Fuck, yeah, he had no idea what he was doing, why had he not got this worrying done sooner?

“That’d be nice, yeah.” Her expression softened back to a smile and she gave him a quick kiss.

“When he’s a dumbass,” she said, “and trust me he will be, all men are-”

“Memu.”

“As your brother proves, giving out his tactics in public.” Again Vivi was snickering. “When he’s a dumbass, give him the benefit of the doubt. There’s plenty of times he’ll do something that upsets you without realizing.”

“Just don’t let him get away with it too much,” Cody added. “He gets three chances for every bullshit thing you correct him on and if he fails you tell us, we’ll bring you and whatever you want right back home.” Kevin chuckled.

“Including the house?” Setting down her designs, Vivi rolled her eyes.

“Kevin, even Sid would dig up a house and move it across the galaxy for you, if just to spite anyone who hurt you. Anyway,” she then said, bringing her attention back to the sketches, “my advice? Don’t be afraid to walk away from a fight and come back later when you’re calmer.”

“Also,” Cody said, “just, be nice. Compliments, gratitude, being respectful.” He gave a bit of a wistful sigh. “The easier and more pleasant you two make things for each other, the happier your home will be and the sooner things will start really working for you.” Kevin nodded along, soaking in the information. Vivi was a wildcard, but Cody was over ten years wed and their grandparents had been married longer than the US had been a country, and he trusted all of them.

“Good advice, all around,” his mother finally said, “but I’ve got more important.” Gently she turned him 180 degrees to face her. “Learn from my mistakes and communicate. Talk about everything, tell him how you feel about everything, any struggles you’re having, any hopes you have, things you want, and encourage him to do the same.” Kevin opened his mouth to speak, but she held up a finger for silence. “I know this is something you have trouble with, because of all the things you had to get from me that was it, but trust me. There’s so much trouble and pain you can avoid if you just talk to your partner. Alright?”

The breath Kevin took was shaky. Everyone knew why, why this was the advice she was giving, and the silence in the room was palpable. With another, steadying breath Kevin nodded.

“Alright. Thanks mom.” You could see the tension wash off his mother’s shoulders as the two of them smiled at each other. Her gaze went soft and nostalgic as she finally took the time to step back and just look at him, before diving forward to wrap her arms around him and bury her face in his chest. It was with a watery smile of his own and a surprised delicacy (fuck, he hadn’t realized until that moment how much bigger than his human relatives he was now…) that he returned the gesture.

“Look at this,” she said with a watery laugh, “my baby’s all grown up.”

#fanfic

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rubysloanes · 7 years ago

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did i really just see [ COURTNEY EATON ]? nah, that’s just [ RUBY SLOANE ], also known as [ THE DOE ] of saguaro hills. apparently, they’re a [ TWENTY ] year old [ WAITRESS ], which is probably why they’ve lived in [ CANYON COURT ] for [ TWO WEEKS ]. i heard that [ THEY ] are known to be very [ SWEET & PATIENT ], but watch out — on their bad days, they can also become very [ MOODY & DEFENSIVE ]. maybe that’s why they came here to [ BE WITH THEIR BOYFRIEND ].

what up it’s cody with another muse already dfndfognfdj ok so ive had ruby in the works for a bit but despite that i dont have their whole story sussed but here’s what u need to know!!! tw for csa, sexual coercion, abuse, addiction,

born and raised in wellington, specifically porirua, by their mum because their dad peaced out when ruby was still in the womb lmao. their mum tried but when ur a poor 22 year old struggling with addiction life aint easy.

despite the struggles ruby and their mum were close and would remain so for most of ruby’s life

keyword: most

when ruby was eight their mum went into rehab and they were put into foster care and soon fostered by a family who lived in thorndon. the couple had long wanted children and ruby seemed to be the answer to their prayers.

but one man’s answered prayer is another’s entrance into hell. ruby’s foster father was particularly fond of his new child, and would often sneak into ruby’s room.

ruby got very good at pretending to be asleep

as puberty struck, ruby began to gain attention due to being very pretty. ruby was left feeling repulsed and enthralled by this attention, a state of being that often confused them. but on more than one occasion they were coaxed into a boy’s arms (and later their beds)

adolescence proved to be a terrible beast. by this point ruby had been abused by years, with no one any the wiser, and they had gained a reputation for being ‘promiscuous’, largely because the thought of refusing to sexually satisfy boys had never occurred to them

they were particularly popular with older boys, all of whom were more than willing to let ruby eat out of their hands

but erratic mood swings had also crept into the picture, along with debilitating depression and anxieties about their future, and who they are as a person. like their mum before them, ruby turned to weed and alcohol in order to cope, and both of these substances were readily supplied by the older boys ruby favoured

while at first ruby’s promiscusity and addiction was known only to their peer group, eventually the school got wind of it and told ruby’s foster parents, who had very different reactions. ruby’s foster mum was sympathetic, as she works with addicts for a living, and sought to get ruby professional help. their foster father however was enraged, but only in private, and he would punish ruby for ‘giving away what belonged to [him]’

ruby’s foster mum hoped that therapy would help, but it would only lead to what would become arguably the worst chapter in ruby’s life

at first the therapist was kind, gentle, and he let ruby reveal everything in their own time. there was never any pressure or sense of obligation to tell him anything, two things that ruby had long learned to associate with men. it didn’t take long for ruby to become utterly devoted to their therapist

(ruby would soon discover that the feeling was more than mutual, but on a much darker scale)

when ruby’s therapist first made a sexual pass, ruby had become so utterly infatuated and devoted, latching onto their therapist as a source of comfort, that they made no protests. they were elated, beyond elated, to find a man who seemed to care for them

keyword: seemed

after ruby graduated from secondary school they took a hospitality course in order to make it easier to find a job, despite their therapist insisting that he could provide for them. as it turned out, ruby thrived in the hospitality industry, their sweet disposition and staunch work ethic earning them many glowing reviews

within a year they were a supervisor at the cafe where they worked, the youngest in the establishment’s history.

that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. with no warning, ruby’s therapist quit his job and convinced ruby to run off to the states with him. at this point ruby was still deliriously infatuated, to the point of believing themselves to be in love, that they agreed

it’s been a good few months since arriving in the states, and here is where ruby stands: they are no longer under their former therapist’s, now boyfriend’s, spell. facing what they have grown to recognise as mental and emotional abuse day after day, they have grown to fear him, but fear being away from him more. where could they go? what could they do? for now they remain by his side, feeling less like a significant other, and more like a prisoner

#saguaro.intro

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raineydaywrites · 7 years ago

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Dark Scandalore au

Okay so I’m too tired to write a full fic and also tumblr has already swallowed this post once, but I want to get down some thoughts about sad scandalore.

- at the beginning it goes much like it did in canon. The Council gets Satine’s message for Obi Wan and are like, “we can’t interfere isn’t an internal matter.” Obi Wan goes anyway.

- he’s concerned because he asked Satine to be careful, but not high key worried yet because he doesn’t know about Maul.

- on the way there in the Twilight he tries to contact Korkie because he knows he’s running with the Nite Owls, but can’t get through. He figures it will work out anyway.

- from there it goes much the same, he steals Death Watch armor, breaks Satine out, they try to leave in the Twilight, it is explodes and maul shows up.

- they get dragged to the throne room and his worry goes up a few notches, but still he’s been through so much and survived all of it and he thinks- he really thinks they’ll make it out okay.

- then maul starts his spiel, chokes Satine and pulls out the dark saber. This is when Obi Wan realizes one of them isn’t going to make it.

- he tries to goad maul into attacking him instead, hoping that he can keep the collateral damage to a minimum, but it doesn’t really work because though maul has a temper, he sees right through Obi Wan right now.

- don’t make me say it.

- okay, so we know what happens next, Satine dies. Her confession goes slightly differently because they are married not just pining from afar, but she still thinks it would b good to remind him that she loves him.

- that’s when it hits. The Dark. He doesn’t Fall, no, he’s not the type, but it’s a closer call than it was in canon (not that it was super close, but you get what I mean). He’s so angry with Maul for what he’s done, he’s grieving, he’s terrified of having to tell Korkie what happened…. it’s a bad time for Obi.

- he pushes it back, reminds himself of his training and tries to breathe through the /pain/ he’s feeling.

- ( he remembers Anakin asking him why he needed the twilight, offering to come along, and his own refusal because he didn’t want to get Anakin in trouble, because two Jedi acting together is less forgivable in the eyes of the Council and Senate than one, and he /regrets/ )

- he’s dragged out by the death watch and saved by the Nite Owls. Korkie is with them. Obi Wan dreads telling him, but he does, finds a moment, because his son deserves to know what happened. He hears a quiet gasp from the people around them, and Bo-Katan turns away from them, grieving.

- he’s afraid Korkie will blame him (force knows he blames himself) but Korkie just looks unbelievably sad, like when he was a little kid and they told him why he couldn’t call Obi Wan “Dad” in public.

- they hold each other for a moment and try not to cry because now is not the time, now it is time to escape. Obi Wan tries to convince Korkie to leave Mandalore with them, but Korkie is his fathers son and he won’t leave people behind who need him. Besides where in the galaxy could he go?

- so obi wan leaves. He pilots a course back to Coruscant, makes himself a cup of tea, and then he falls out of battle mode and has nothing to distract him from what has happened.

- in canon I think he held it together, maybe shed a few tears, but he reminded himself of all he’s learned and pushes it down deep.

- in this au, oh he breaks. He loved his wife dearly and now she’s gone, at the hands of his old enemy and he /breaks/

- he makes it back to the Temple, where he is scolded harshly but the Council, though it doesn’t know the truth, knows he cared about Satine and let’s him go off to his apartment, figuring he can meditate on her death and move on.

- He walks numbly through the Temple and considers. He’s always figured he’d leave the Order one day, when the war is over and they don’t need him as much, but now, where would he go? And so he realizes he can’t let on how much he cared for Satine because it will ruin the only thing he has left going for him.

- Anakin is in his apartment when he gets there, and that was not anticipated, he thought he’d be able to be alone again. Instead, he makes a pot of tea, hands shaking as he pours Anakin a cup, and Anakin can tell something’s off but he doesn’t know what.

- Obi Wan’s voice breaks when he tells Anakin what happens. (Must fix that, he thinks, and he does, repeating the fact that Satine is dead later that night over and and over until he can say the words without emotion.)

- Anakin doesn’t know the whole truth yet, but he knows Obi Wan cared and he’s a good friend, offering him whatever he needs. Obi Wan says he would like some space.

- he spends the rest of the evening trying to meditate, but this familiar action is little comfort now though it does help a little. He just can’t seem to focus!

- that night he lies down to go to sleep and he can’t. He knows why. He’s spent countless nights alone because of the situation they’re in, but he has had nights where he missed Satine and wanted to be with her. He usually holocalled her and talked with her and that helped, but there is no comfort now.

- the next day is even worse because he’s gotten little to no sleep and everyone know he went on an unsanctioned mission to save his friend and failed, and are offering their remorse over the death of his “friend.” It’s the only time he feels like a proper grieving husband- a widower, he realizes with another pang

- he blames himself. Maybe if he hadn’t married her none of this wouldn’t have happened. If he hadn’t been so obvious with his emotions Maul wouldn’t have killed her (he’s wrong, even if they’d stayed apart this still would have happened, but there’s no one to tell him that.)

- everyone can tell he’s not dealing with this the way a Jedi is supposed to deal with losing a friend (and there’s a reason for that, he’s dealing with this as a man who lost his wife). Weeks later and he still looks like death warmed over. No one can get him to talk about it except Anakin. So everyone goes to him with their concerns.

- Anakin confronts him one day, and Obi Wan tells him the truth. Anakin is shocked and horrified. Obi Wan thinks the latter is because Obi Wan has revealed himself to be a hypocrite but Anakin’s soft “you lost your wife?” a moment later proves that to be untrue. Obi Wan expects Anakin to tell the Council and for him to be kicked out of the Order, but he can’t seem to bring himself to care right now. He needs his friend to help him.

- Anakin refuses to say a word to anyone about what he and Obi Wan talked about that day, but everyone agrees it helped. That doesn’t mean it’s over though.

- /everything/ reminds him of her, even things that reasonably shouldn’t, but she’s never far from his mind these days. He finds himself trying not to cry at the strangest times and his mind feels blurred, like he’s staring at the world through a curtain.

- eventually he’s reassigned to the field, and the 212th can tell something’s up, and they have an inkling what it is.

- Obi Wan holds himself tighter and looks a little colder and fights just a touch too hard until one day Cody sits him down and admits that he knew Obi Wan and Satine were involved. Obi Wan gets a chance to talk about Satine to someone for once because all the Jedi expect him to push it aside, but the clones have no such qualms.

- and he probably talks to Padme about it too because like, they’re friends and she knew Satine and it helps

- I can’t decide if this makes Anakin easier to turn or harder, because Anakin and Obi Wan are closer here, so making Anakin think of Obi Wan as an enemy is harder, but also, Anakin has now seen what it did to his friend to lose his wife, felt just a part of his pain through their bond and its worse than he imagined and he’ll do anything to avoid that.

And yeah. That’s my thoughts. ;) @forcearama how do like my twisting of your happy au? I know Star Wars doesn’t need any help to be sad, but like, when the opportunity arrives take it.

#obi wan kenobi #obitine #satine kryze #scandalore #dark Scandalore au

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allcnthorne-blog · 8 years ago

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Oh gosh hi everyone. I'm sofia and I'm a dumb nerd. I haven't done an rp in forever, forgive me if I suck. Anyhow, I'd like to introduce you to the little brussel sprout that is Allen:

He grew up just a dozen miles away or so. His parents are divorced, but he and his dad lived together, in an off-the-grid house way up in the mountains.

Unfortunately his dad had a way of walking that thin line between being a plain old bad parent and being abusive. Mr. Thorne was a bit of a conspiracy theorist survival nut who was obsessed with preparing Allen for the upcoming "collapse of society." This included berating him whenever he showed any sign of weakness or reliance on other people. Everything from dreaming about having a real job to working too hard at his schoolwork when he could be learning "real skills" was a reason to get yelled at.

When he was 16, Allen concluded that living with his dad was keeping him from being the independent survivor he apparently had to be. He left a note and ran away. The fact that his dad never went to look for him shows that he probably approved of his reasoning. He spent years wandering the wilderness of Colorado, living off the land as he grew up doing.

After a few years of being on his own and taking some chances with mingling into society, Allen realized that civilization wasn't nearly as unstable as his dad made him assume. Still, he loved nature, although more in a hippy way than a hardcore survivalist way. He decided he was finally going to get a real job like he sometimes dreamed about.

This turned out to be harder than he thought. His dad had never gotten him a social security number, he had no job experience, and to top it off he never graduated high school. Not many people were in the market to employ someone like him. He started squatting in an abandoned cabin near Wildewind while he searched for a job, living off the land like he always did.

He finally got a job that paid in cash at a landscaping company. He's saving up to get a real apartment, but the pay isn't great so it's slow going. Plus… he kind of likes his little cabin. He's fixed it up a lot and it feels like home. Still, he fears that if someone finds out he's living there, he'll get in trouble and may get kicked out or arrested.

Anyway, enough about his backstory—Allen LOVES NATURE. You don't understand. He L O V E S it. his best friend is probably a tree

Because of how he grew up he's very determined to prove that he can take care of himself, so he tries to look tough and capable all the time

Still, he's got the personality of marshmallow. He's the biggest softie you'll ever meet, he thinks everything is cute and he's enthusiastic about everything

All he wants to do is watch sunsets and have a pet goat tbh he is a simple man

Unfortunately his isolated upbringing made him socially awkward and incapable of handling difficult social situations properly. Chances of him letting you down if you get him involved in your drama are very high.

He also has a bad habit of shutting other people out because he feels like he has to do absolutely everything on his own

He may know how to identify every plant in the woods, but good luck making a pop culture reference that doesn't fly over his head. His computer skills are that of an 80 year old grandpa.

Also his fashion sense is terrible

This is going to be very weird for me, I usually play Cody Christian as a grumpy computer nerd type, so forgive me once again if it takes me a minute to settle into this muse

Anyway if anyone wants to plot hmu!! I’m so excited

#ooc;#GOOD DAY EVERYONE #introductions ahoy

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pinksweatergettingbetter · 8 years ago

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ah i almsot forgot: warning, the following has mainly snarky opinions on Spirit of Justice. Reader discretion is advised.

and we’re back to our scheduled programming

time to be rendered unconscious against your will you lil shit

“i hardly think anyone could pass out from eating something like this”

clearly you dont know what world youre living in, Sadmad.

...also he... might be allergic, guys. ever thought of that?

yes, EAT! EAT OR WE WILL HARASS YOU, POSSIBLY INNOCENT BYSTANDER!!! YOU THINK YOU HAVE RIGHTS???? CRAM THAT SHIT DOWN YOUR THROAT BEFORE I DO!!!!

...uh;

FIVE IS NOT AN OCCUPATION!!! EAT ANOTHER BUN AS PUNISHMENT!!!! REGRESS FURTHER!!!! HFKJGU;SUUSRSO

coping jokes aside holy shit

don’t hurt this tiny boy!!!

i hope you all feel guilty for being such pricks.

look at him. he's curled up under his jacket like a traumatized baby

at least this personality... sort of aligns with how DID is supposed to work? But now i just feel even worse. Someone get that kid a teddy and a juice-box, stat!

“Its clear that none of his personalities could be the killer!”

A) one of the three could still be lying

B) there’s four so far, what’s to discount a fifth? triggered by... i dunno, a reefer brownie.

C) I'm actually glad he's not the killer anyway just wanted to point out the possibilities youre discounting there

i love that theyre playing the goofy X people music for a traumatized five year old who witnessed a horrific murder of a loved one.

“I believe the person who laid the cards out is the very person who killed the victim” WELL.... DOY.

“How quickly you move onto a new theory when your old theory proves false!”

WELL.......... DOY

I love that theyre all just yelling and screaming about murder while the tiny child cowers behind the bench

hello??? anybody with compassion anywhere? maybe in the gallery? a bailiff? anybody???

“his emotions are spiralling out of control! something must have really frightening him”

maybe

THE FUCKING MURDER????

athena youre a psychologist; dont you know anything about calming people down or at least putting them at ease? youre gonna put scars on this kid’s scars!

i mean at least Cody Hackins was fairly fearless and defiant about what happened to him and only really broke down once it dawned on him what he’d actually seen. Owen is clearly very, very upset.

i passed out *image promptly closes eyes*

“poor kid, he's absolutely terrified of something”

KDJFKLDGDGL

“whatever it is, it might be the root of his out of control emotions!”

DSHFA;SLGHOHSO GIRSHG’

“see, all we got out of this boy is a tale he dreamt up”

fuck off sadmad

(sigh) Owen’s on his side, Shisho’s laying down, just get to it already

“rotating your thinking about?”

“oh! you mean turning your thinking around!”

“yeah, whatever...”

(SNERK)

“like the forehead, perhaps”

is that... just a random location or is it actually going to come true

also, back at the office, Apollo winces and he can’t figure out why

oh yeah its definitely gonna come back.

WHOA; OK, MANHANDLING

MANHANDLING, NOT GOOD

STEP AWAY FROM THE ATTORNEY, BLACKQUILL

yeah just fucking manhandle the stressed out anxious girl. you piece of shit. i knew me being your friend wouldn’t fuckin last.

“MOTIVE, OPPORTUNITY, EVIDENCE??? IS THAT ALL IT TAKES TO MAKE YOU STOP BELIEVING IT YOUR CLIENT?!”

to be fuckin fair, cuckoo, thats usually what loses most cases.

would phoenix manhandle athena?? would he berate her and shake her into doing her best?? i highly doubt it.

“prosecutor blackquill was just giving me a pep talk, thats all!”

athena thats unhealthy

legitimately simon’s been nothing but unpleasant this entire time. its fun to watch him wreck sadmad’s shit but he needs to keep the hell away from athena. whatever protective, elder-brotherly instincts he had for her in DD seem to have stayed in DD.

man I'm looking back at my previous commentary and i was. i was just so optimistic. how foolish. franziska, bring down your lash upon this foolishly foolish fool.

atcuall dont i bruise like a peach

jeez now I'm imagining Super Dad™ Phoenix Wright cross examining Owen with Athena instead and it’s melting my cold, hard heart

“unfortunately, i spy nothing of the sort”

again Sadmad acts like if he doesn't see the answer, then it’s nonexistent

not very monk-y of you, Sadmad.

gotta admit, i love this unique murder weapon

ive actually nearly suffocated under soft, cold, gloopy stuff and lemme tell you, its not fun.

...i love that simon took that logic-attack for us

maybe the animators just wanted to play his OH SHIT animation again

i know it looks like i pick on everything but in fact i edit these down. sometimes i take out whole statements because i rationalize them and realize that theyre actually plausible and i let them slide. so just, y’know. if you think I'm just blindly going at it, i am actually giving this game the benefit of the doubt. you just dont see it.

...if you read these

...uh

they used the pre-prepped noodles in the fridge. c’mon guys, as athena would say: Andale!

“perhaps the victim was simply playing with the cards, and they hold no other meaning”

oh NOW THEY COULD BE UNRELATED TO THE CASE

OF COURSE, NOW THAT IT’S CONVENIENT TO YOU

you sack’a shit

nice cliffhanger, kid.

Oh well; I’m partially glad that the poor lil guy can get a rest, and partially upset that his last two surfaces put him through intense anguish. maybe get Uendo drunk and go to the theatre or something, guys. poor baby could use a pick-me-up.

n no–– rise from the ashes flashbacks–– RISE FROM THE ASHES FLASHBACKS

THE LUNCHBOXES

SO MANY LUNCHBOXES

AAAAAHHHHhhhhi gotta give bucky a hand; being drunk and riding a skateboard while supporting a tower of bentos isn’t an easy feat

ew slurping

and simon extends his douchiness to the guys he's even shafting Athena for.

just, fuckin, lighten the fuck UP simon, CHRIST

TIDDIES

seriously tho; we haven’t had a proper boob joke in ages. actually Geiru kinda reminds me of April May...

Meanwhile we’ve had several testicle references, a drunk guy, and the bloodiest overarching plot the series has ever had. I think we’ve left Ace behind and graduated to Edge Attorney

to be fair the judge could totally be talking about her actual rubber balloons, considering his childlike personality at times. so maybe ITS YOU, SADMAD, WHO’S THE VULGAR ONE!

GET YOUR MIND OUTTA THE GUTTER!!

bloooon. i think Drifloon says that, too. Is that a japenese onomatopoeia or something?

ooh he sadMad

heh

i guess its up to simon’s brilliant mind tricks to save us again..?

...yehhhh i knew it

...huh. didnt expect that. impressive use of air...sword... skill.

IM NOT A KOORAHEENIST, SHE’S NOT GONNA HEAR ME ANYWAY.

i know what theyre building up and yes, i am super excited to see all those balloons pop

...i gotta ask tho, why does Athena think those balloon animals are bad?? theyre extremely intricate and they look a lot more like the thing she promised than most of the ones ive seen.

aw no the cake disappeared. i want a huge explosion at the end!!

“I’ma cut ya, witch!”

...

.....

........

i uh, i have to um,,,,,,, go now

SHES GONNA CUT OFF A TIT

GIRD YERSELF ATHENA

me, into my DS mic: HOLD IT. Hold IT. Hold it. hold it... hold it... bold it

athena; HOLD IT

simon: athena youre stupid do something. I'm not helping you.

simon: this time I'm going to do something, but god forbid you dont run with it

i dont think we’ve ever had a co counsel add something to the testimony for us before. we’ve had them hint at answers and interrupt trials to get us out of tight spots, but never directly ordering something like that. Guess that proves just how highly BK thinks of Athena’s abilities......

ooh the cakes back and there was a pop

im super ready for this

shit thats a strong balloon. i wouldn’t advice biting very thing plastic...

............

the... fuck???

sadmad: here is what will prove that Geiru IS NOT the murderer!

(geiru reveals buckwheat allergy and ACUAL RED HAND)

how the fuck does that help your case, Sadmad?? We know that the killer used the dough to kill the master by suffocating him with it. Pointing out that she came into contact with the dough, WITH HER HANDS, IS PROVING SHE DID IT.

YOU JUST GOT HER CAUGHT LITERALLY RED-HANDED.

HOW DOES THIS HELP YOUR CASE??????

ok well apparently she could die just by being in the room but if we look at how badly her hand has reacted, and is still reacting, Geiru should probably have at least some difficulty talking if “breathing in the flour” was dangerous. If her hand reacted that badly from minor contact, her throat should be shut like a steel trap. what I'm saying is, she’s probably lying about the severity.

“As if I would do anything so underhanded”

oh sad-‘trigger my enemies into yielding’-mad, youre hilarious

y’know i just realized, it is a little insensitive of Taifu to make/buy/keep soba around the place. if Geiru is this deadly allergic, he’s risking killing her simply because he can’t give up his precious noodles. thats like living with someone with a deadly peanut allergy and being all “can’t get enough of my PBnJ!!”

its time for

Off!

Brand!

Logic!!!!

oh. its not. ...ok

hang on didnt she say the dough was udon already, or am i misremembering? if she did and everyone just forgot, thats a little sad.

anyway, i guess thats... an alright twist. i still say that saying your witness is allergic to something and showing a reaction on the body part associated with the murder is stupid thing to do.

“dont lose your nerve now. keep charging forward or you'll feel my blade at your back”

I'm just gonna let that speak for itself.

ah THERES the off brand logic. and we’re finally gonna talk about those fucking noodles in the fridge. its been a long time coming.

i like that ‘ramen’ is a third choice every time

that was a pretty involved murder. “alright, kill the old man, hmm hmm... make a dish that i’m deathly allergic to to throw of the scent; just gotta get the cooking! make sure Uendo doesn’t wake up and catch me in the act~~ get rid of the dough in a way that is probably time consuming, lalala~ and there! Blooooon, the perfect crime!”

how much time did she have??

also how much blood did she lose form that knick on her forehead? if its enough to permeate an entire clump of dough, she should probably need a transfusion.

simon: dog pun. have you figured out the twist yet???? DOG PUN, BY THE WAY. JUST SO YOU KNOW.

all the balloons are there. its time.

seriously, thats gotta be a lot of blood. I'm getting Gingerdead Man flashbacks.

“i wanna thank you, simon. without your constant abuse, i wouldn’t have been scared enough to succeed for fear of what would happen if i failed!”

...its a bit premature for breakdown animations; the police haven't gotten back to us about the dough...

...i didnt like this balloon explosion as much as i thought i was going to. this is kinda just... uncomfortable.

you know, she shouldn’t have resorted to murder or blaming the crime on an innocent, but I feel like Taifu should’ve.... I dunno, either Trained her properly or let her down easy instead of forcing her to be a sexy balloon clown.

It’s clear she really, really wanted to succeed her father’s name, (which I'm a little confused about; was he one of Taifu’s students? What is Uendo’s real name then? what is any of their real names...) so I’m sure that if she just practiced enough, she’d probably be able to do what she needed to get to that level of entertainment. And if she couldn’t, letting her down easy and encouraging her to find something she actually liked instead of making her do... um... balloons would probably be a whole lot less nasty.

also wtf uendo; what did whet ever do to you

man all of these people were kind of dicks. except bucky. the guy who came to his trial drunk.

Sadmad: Hmm.... upon further deliberation... seeing as you won... I believe I shall afford you a basic sense of human respect..................

Athena: thats all I ask, prosecutor sadmahdi!

heyy he’s sobered up! or should I say... SOBA’D UP AAAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH but seriously i don’t think they’ve said drunk or hungover once in this entire case what the fu

“no way... i almost got convicted out of convenience?” you, larry butz, maggey byrde and a shit tonne of other characters in the series. its actually a fairly common occurrence.

“he didn’t give her the name because he wanted geiru to find her own calling in life...”

...you know. after foisting a sexy balloon routine on her. to encourage her to quite entertainment.

obviously Taifu was using the Simon Blackquill approach to encouragement.

“making udon was his way of showing his support of her in her new endeavour”

...what does that... mean

“oh, i’ll make safe dough instead of the stuff THAT KILLS HER to prove that i support her!”

genius

“So this entire situation happened because of a misunderstanding? How sad...”

i think you mean,,, hhhh

i hate misunderstanding plots so so much

this entire case is just “he was being an asshole to ENCOURAGE you, see!! now you HAVE to forgive him!!”

newsflash: no i dont. you know what works better than fear tactics, threats and coercion?

BEING ACTUALLY SUPPORTIVE

“he probably used some tough love on you so that the shop wouldn’t just go belly up”

I SAID SUPPORTIVE. ARE YOU DEAF???

see? athena is being a little misguided but at least she's using a positive -food- to try to accomplish something.

“i’ll make sure its got all the TLC Master Toneido would’ve packed in it, too!”

you got it! one ice-cold, bitter, al-dente bowl with a side of vinegar, comin’ right up!

no athena!! brand loyalty!! mr eldoon will never forgive you!!!

“do us all proud, bucky”

or else

(flashes air sword)

Athena: I wonder if this gave me any experience as a lawyer...

Simon: HAHA WRONG, IF I HADN’T BEEN THERE YOU’D HAVE HAD THE SHIT KICKED OUT OF YOU. YOU SUCK, ATHENA, AND YOU DO EVERYTHING WRONG. FUCK YOU~!

see what annoys me about this is that when I first played Athena, I had some issues with her being too inexperienced to be a proper lawyer, especially with her court-related PTSD which could seriously endanger her clients.

However... Why are they bringing up her lack of experience in the one case (it’s not even a full case) in a game that isn’t even about her? And ignoring all the progress she made in Dual Destinies?

The way they’re talking about it is as if theyre setting up some kind of sequel; ‘you need to improve athena, you need to practice’. Which would have been all well and good for one of the cases in the first run of her own game... but Athena has been and continues to be a side character to Apollo and Phoenix. Rather than this moment coming at a crucial moment in her own game, it comes out of nowhere during a case she got last minute, couldn’t have prepared for, and is abused throughout.

what I'm saying is, the ghosts of DD past has come to haunt us. They introduced Athena too early and are bungling up her character development. Lawyers need a full set of games to let them grow. Just make an actual Apollo Justice 2 or Athena Cykes 1, but don’t insult us by pretending that this five minute shit actually did either of them justice.

Simon: I hope you stay shitty so that I can always win

brilliant.

you know, usually when a character is jerk with a heart of gold, that ‘heart of gold’ thing is supposed to show up at the end.

i was going to ignore the horrible joke but then Widget said “ROTFL”

what a... great way to end this....... great case

and so we close this one off, and for a case about tasty food, it sure left a bitter taste in my mouth.

#sulking over SOJ #soj spoilers #soj spoilers obvs]#i had so many hopes simon

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