#but there might be life on europa and I want to look at it i want to look at it so badddddd

[baejax-the-great]

I definitely was the cliche kid with the marine biologist phase, but on god I am still in my xenobiologist phase it is the dream it is the dREAM I want it so bad

[kuwdora]

Saturday Morning Vid Recs - Space and Robots

@tafkarfanfic asked me for vid recs that are similar to the following vids:

Data’s Dream by GayleF (Gayle) and TasheryS which premiered at Escapade in 1994 - made on a VCR!! - and was remastered by morgandawn in 2004. Definitely check out the Fanlore page about Data’s Dream. Star Trek + multi-source.

Starships by bironic. Multi-source. The history of Starships on Fanlore.

These two vids are iconic. Please check them out and learn about their history from the Fanlore page, it's a great look at some vidding history and culture. Amazing vids, do love. As for some recs. I love this kind of prompt. More vids like [this vid] is so much fun. I dug deep into my vid rec archives and brain and bookmarks. I’ve also crowdsourced some recs from the vidding discord. Thank you to @rukbat3, @sandalwoodbox, @fairestcat, @monkeyswithjetpacks, @grammarwoman for the reccing help! And everyone else I might have forgotten.

From Land to Sky - and kicking ass while you're there!

Landsailor by @singlecrow/raven. Multi-source. Swades (We, The People); Master and Commander; 3 Idiots; The Dish; The West Wing; Parks and Recreation; Flight of the Phoenix; NASA archive footage; Apollo 13. ❤️ We're gonna need a bigger boat. Come O’ Eclipse by melodytree. Tenchi: The Samurai Astronomer. Calendar-making! Math puzzles! Astronomy! Politics! Eclipses! Oh my! Galaxyrise by starlady. Multi-source. Apollo 13 (1995), Interstellar (2014), Gravity (2013), Europa Report (2013), Contact (1997), The Martian (2015). This vid is full of so much wonder! The sky calls to us/If we do not destroy ourselves/We will one day venture to the stars. Going through space with the world by bironic. Space Exploration RPF. ❤️❤️❤️ From "day in the life of an astronaut" videos to international stardom; or, Chris Hadfield and his adorable mustache. Monsters of the Cosmos by CherryIce. Thor/MCU. Jane Foster/Science.Cherry’s editing is goddamn incredible. In the last century, black holes have gone from being mathematical curiosities to real objects in the cosmos. This is a vid about Jane Foster and her one true love, Science. Also, Thor is there. Toxic by JinkyO. The Planets (TV - 2019). Humanity/The Solar System. This vid is so fucking brilliant and makes me cackle in love and awe so much. It's dangerous, I'm loving it. Sci-Fi Friday in a Blender by Luminosity. Multi-source. Farscape, Battlestar Galactica and Doctor Who. So much happening in this vid. This is among one of the earliest vids I remember watching and became obsessed with back in the day. Supernova Girl by @usuallyhats. Multifandom. Doctor Who, Star Wars, Babylon 5, Steven Universe, Andromeda, Farscape, Battlestar Galactica, Firefly, Mass Effect, Stargate. So many wonderful brilliant amazing EXCELLENT supernova women and girls. Zoom, zoom, zoom. Space Girl by @aurumcalendula. Multi-source scifi. Inspired by Charmax’s Space Girl vid and Bironic’s The Greatest. This vid has a great selection of newer tv shows and films and it’s fun to play spot that character. But also this vid will grab you by the heart, too. Utterly brilliant, perfection. A must watch!! 'I've been as far in hyperspace as anybody can.' One Girl Revolution by bessyboo. Star Wars, original and prequel. Padme and Leia!! Seeing these two focused on in one Star Wars vid is an adventurous kickass ride. I'll be everything that I want to be. Space Girl by charmax. Multi-source scifi. One of the most beautiful epic space vids out there! I know I’ve recced this before and I’ll rec it again and again and again. My momma told me I should never watch Sci-fi but I did, I did, I did.

Robots! More than wires.

If a Machine by caramarie, Multi-source. Robot narrative focusing on machine origin, intelligence, and interaction with humanity. And Human fallibility. An incredibly rewarding watch and rewatch. This is the story of cables and copper wirings. Electric Avenue by @monkeyswithjetpacks. Multi-source robots! Nate’s multi-vids are always so fun, especially when it’s showcasing classic cinema and all these excellent serials. Electric Avenue has source from 1919 to 2015. His editing is always on fucking point. Don’t miss this vid. We’re gonna rock down to electric avenue. Everybody by @kuwdora. Star Trek, the Borg. This vid was actually inspired by the Backstreet Boys original music video. I still have the vivid memory of watching or rewatching the original music video in @ars-amatoria ’s kitchen. And then at some point realizing it is perfect for the Borg. Am I original, am I the only one? Fembots by Grammarwoman. Multi-source. Sexy sharp editing and fun use of all the sources. The intersection of women and technology: a spectrum of clones, AIs, gynoids, cyborgs, and other artificial creations. On by @rhoboat77. Star Trek: Picard. A Soji fanvid. Rho has the sharpest editing skills this side of the Internet and this Soji vid is so fucking badass and worth 100 rewatches. Can’t hold me down cuz you know I’m a fighter. Que Sera Sera by @ohvienna. Star Trek Voyager and Picard. Seven of Nine.Nobody vids their Seven of Nine love like @ohvienna. You gotta watch this if you love Seven. Whatever will be, will be…"

Journey through Space.

To Touch the Face of God by destina. Multi-source. The Right Stuff (1983, )The Dream Is Alive, From the Earth to the Moon (TV).This is one of the most beautiful moving vids you will EVER, and I mean EVER see. From Chuck Yeager, to the Mercury 7, and on to Apollo and the Space Shuttle Program (STS) - a very human history of the triumphs, joys, and tragedies of the USA's journey into space. Doctor Who on Holiday by sisabet. Farscape, Battlestar Galactica and Doctor Who. A mashup vid of Luminosity’s Sci-Fi Friday in a Blender. This vid inspired me so much. And I have 10 very intense ideas about how I would do my own remix of this vid if I were to make it right now. Fly Me To the Moon by thirdblindmouse. Multi-source. This vid has everything! Alien sex! Xenophilia! Zero-gravity sex! Mpreg!!! Because everyone knows this song is about space sex. Game Night in Space by garrideb. Multi-source. This vid!!!!! IS! SO! MUCH! FUN!! Game on! How are you going to spend those long nights on your starship? Play games, of course! Space poker, space chess, space Monopoly… this is a fanvid celebrating game night in space, set to Don't Stop Me Now by Queen. Starships (Monochromatic Remix) by @monkeyswithjetpacks. Multi-source. See the Fanlore page on the history of Starships (Monochromatic Remix). ALSO check out jetpack-monkey’s extensive notes and side-by-side comparison vid of the original vid and his vid!! He matched Starships shot-for-shot! Most brilliant work ever. The vid notes aren’t on the ao3 page so I HIGHLY recommend checking out the notes on his dreamwidth page! This vid is 10 million kinds of brilliant and technical prowess and perfection.

Vidshow Rec

Alien Invasion! - 30 vids curated and organized into a show by @tafadhali for VidUKon 2024. Featuring films and tv shows: Nope, Attack the Block, Pacific Rim, Venom, Doctor Who, Stargate Atlantis, Star Trek, Prey, Smallville, Rowswell, Supergirl, Arrival, Starship Troopers and more.

Follow these tags to keep up with vid recs this summer:

#saturday morning vid recs

#kuwdora recs

A helpful guide I wrote:

How to Leave Feedback on Fanvids

[megachiraztfs]

Transformation series

Magic Mirror: If you look into this mirror, you might become a different person. It is truly fascinating how willing some mirrors are to talk and how willing they are to come out of their shells.

Part 1: Slow Down

Part 2: An Improved Life

Part 3: No More Stress

Part 4: Beware of the mirror

Part 5: Even Better

The Wedding: It all started with a divorce and an invitation to a magnificent wedding party. Some people say “A wedding changes a human’s life forever” and I couldn’t agree more.

Part 1: Jealousy

Part 2: Spice Up!

Part 3: Red Love

Royal Revolution: The old and noble family of Cunningham could no longer stand the disastrous situation in the world - it was time for a new aristocracy. Follow the steps of the creation of a new world.

Part 1: The Duke

Part 2: The Recruitement

Part 3: Revenge

Part 4: A New-Old Profession

Part 5: In Need of a Tailor

Part 6: Gardening Time

Atleast six more parts are planned! This series will have about 12 to 15 parts in the end.

House of Change: Deep within rural Europa the house of Gerald E. Baxter can be found - the famous writer with an affinity for supernatural and special creatures who roam inside his house. Every room can be explored only once.

Part 1: The Stage Is Yours

Part 2: Keeper of the Grounds

Part 3: Dark Melody

I’m open for more parts, but have nothing planned in detail! 

The Captain’s Crew: After become the Dark One, Captain Hook (Once Upon a Time) needs a new crew. Of course, he has standards and expectations for a true pirate. And although he wants his old friends and other people to join the party, they need some adjustments.

Part 1: Stank

Part 2: Jack & Felipe

Part 3: Elly

I’m open for more parts! 😎

Four (mini series): Four friends have run away from home, leaving their families and their stuffy futures behind. But in the middle of nowhere they run out of gas and find a very special place with a special past. This series is completed!

Part 1: Drew & Finley

Part 2: Jon & George

Part 3: Marc & Fred

Part 4: Bert & Gale

[mydarlingbat]

Batman Europa #3 lemme just inform everyone that i did not feel like making this one, and It's only because I have to do two parts to Batman Europa #3. there's so many wonderful moments in this issue. It'd be illegal for me not to show all of them. Alright let's talk about the first cutout panel from Batman Europa'#3 I would like to elaborate on Batman's patience here. I've already said this before, however Batman has so much patience with the Joker. He literally just sighs and ask the Joker can he stop his babbling. Batman here is obviously just trying to start a fight. He's once again grabbing the Joker recklessly. Batman you can just ask him you know? Plus he already mention he told you, so this just let's me know you want to argue a little, or even chat a little, but I do think he's also making sure the Joker isn't setting him up. The Joker telling Batman is hypocritical question is so funny to me, and Batman responds with 'heh that's funny' I swear theses two are so married. Batman doesn't tell the Joker to shut up until he talks about them murdering each other. I wonder why? What I really wanted to point out that the Joker listens to the Batman and be quiet for a whole hour? I'm in awe to be honest. The fact that Batman is complimenting the Joker again, and chucking too. It gives me life. Batman is so free around him.

Batman's over here thinking. 'What heart?' Nah, I'm just joking around. I have no doubt that he's just flabbergasted by the Joker right now. He is finding out something new about him, and he's just surprise by it, but I love how his mouth slightly hangs open in befuddle way, like is this really happening too.

I can't entirely believe that Batman just stands by, watching the Joker. He so fascinated with this man!!! Batman also refers to the Joker as his closet enemy. What he really meant is his closest friend. It's in disguise. I'm telling you. I mean but why did he choose those words though? He could've have said my greatest enemy. Bruce please stop playing with us here.

Like Bruce are you saying that the Joker has charm? I actually love this page, because Batman's aware of the Joker's charm. The Joker doesn't need to look amazing in appearance. What makes up for his appearance is his charm itself. It's why Batman can be so intrigue by the Joker, and find him attractive. Batman also wanted to know how it feels to be the Joker, and again Batman's kind of complimenting the Joker here.

I just can't with Batman always trying to start a fight here. The Joker refuses to fight with the Batman while they're working together, but Batman continue to try to go back with the usually routine. Let's fight a little. Batman looks like he misses it more than the Joker here to be honest, but here's a theory. I believe Batman desires the touches from the Joker. He's not fighting with him, which involves a lot of touching. This is Batman way of getting that from the Joker, without making it obvious, and the reason I believe this is because after the Joker's touches Batman arm to call him down He relaxes and doesn't seem the littlest mad to be honest. Batman also grabs the Joker constantly, and even chokes him throughout the comic run. The Joker on the other hand isn't trying to fight with Batman, because he feels free touching Batman whatever way he pleases. Batman's the one who has to stop him. I mean Batman can clearly see no one's laughing. The Joker isn't laughing neither. Batman just find a reason to grab the Joker. He waits for the Joker to say anything about him to attack, that's the only way to touch him without him feeling wrong about it. Now this is just a theory. It definitely might not be true, or maybe it's something I deeply want. Lmao

And the way Batman willingly let's the Joker push him away says a whole lot, and not Bruce raising his hand to ask a question. Oh my god! I'm dying. The Joker just over here like 'bats shut up' and Batman is raising his hand like can I ask something. I can't even think of another villain Batman has done this with? It's so funny to me. I just love, love how the Joker speaks to Batman like he's a child, and Bruce takes it. It's just my opinion.

[raspberrylover28]

Titan will LITERALLY become "the middle earth".

Like, once the Sun becomes a red giant, Saturn will not only be the middle planet of the system, but his orbit will be in the new goldilocks zone. That means Titan's orbit will also be in said zone, which sounds GREAT until you think about it.

Because what if humanity is still around by that time? I severely doubt that after billions of years they still haven't tried colonizing Titan. Once the Sun becomes big enough, even terraformed Mars would be EXTREMELY close to the star and the heat would most likely force the earthlings to abandon Mars's surface entirely. Unless they came up with some insane, sci-fi technology, but let's assume that even if they do, the heat would be unbearable. Plus, by that point Mars could have already been polluted to hell and back, so the earthlings would have to look for a new home either way.

I don't think the earthlings would see Titan as their only option. Jupiter's orbit would also be in the goldilocks zone, even if it was on the warmer side, so Ganymede and Europa could also be good options. Other moons could also become habitable, who knows! But I feel like Titan would be THE earthling colony.

And I don't think Titan would like that.

He wouldn't push the earthlings away, of course not. They're in need of a shelter (AKA a celestial body) in order to survive and Titan is their best option. Plus, Titan might even have a bit of a soft spot for humanity at that point in time, since they're Earth's life and Earth isn't around anymore. Plus, it was an earthling astronaut that discovered life on Titan's surface, even if said astronaut was forced to do it. Titan has to lend them his surface, it's the right thing to do.

But Titan has life too, doesn't he? And a few billion years is more than enough time for it to evolve, become sentient, even! But Titan won't be able to see it grow and shape it's own identity. The earthlings will be there, and they will leave their mark deeply. Sure, maybe Titan's life will develop it's own languages, cultures, holidays, even religions. But in the end, the similarities with the earthling culture would be so obvious that Titan's natives might as well be an earthling country, and not a whole other species. He will become "the middle earth" even to the creatures that crawled out of his oceans. It would be hard not to feel bitter.

To celestial objects, he was Saturn's favorite moon. To the life forms, he's a replacement for Earth. He's always in someone's shadow, nothing is his.

And I feel like he wants something that is his. I think that's why he wanted to start the moon strike in the first place. He wanted to show that he's more than the people around him, that he is strong and kind and compassionate. So people think about him as the leader of the moon revolution, the president of the moon club, the first moon to develop life. So people look up to him.

He constatly acts like he's the morally superior one that does no wrong, it's why he villainizes Ganymede and Europa in the moon club arc. Now that people are looking at him and not his titles, he wants them to see him as his best self. He's not pretending to be a good person, either! He genuinly wants to help people because that's the right thing to do.

But maybe, when millions, if not billions of earthlings are crammed on his surface like sardines, drilling and exploiting and ripping him open, Titan would wonder if it was all worth it.

[kaesaaurelia]

In which a daring space pilot divebombs the Great Red Spot of Jupiter against the advice of his doctor

Not sure how I'm going to be posting this fic or writing it because it's coming to me in disconnected chunks, but here's the first(ish) scene of my 3rd Life space colonists/terraformers AU.

character designs & concepts

main AU tag

The fact that Grian comes to him first is absolutely lost on Scar. What isn't lost on Scar is that he's about halfway to lightspeed when he gets the ping, and he doesn't see any reason to slow down to talk to Grian. He can say pretty much anything to Grian, because whatever he says, all he's gonna get back is --

"Scar, what are you doing?"

Grian's voice is shrill and terrified, and his transparent hands grip some invisible desk or railing or something in front of him. It's very funny how frightened he is, especially since he's not even really here in person. He'd probably be loving this if he was here in person. "I was just thinking about how I missed Europa, so --"

"Pull up, pull up!" Grian shouts.

Scar does, and watches the white-blue moonscape fade into the distance. "Did you want to call back later?" he asks Grian's hologram. "Is this a bad time?"

"You almost didn't miss Europa," Grian tells him, looking slightly green.

"But I did!" says Scar. "Anyway, I would've landed in the water, it would've been fine."

"Is… I… it's been a while since I took physics, but I don't think that's how it works, Scar," says Grian.

"So! What brings you to my lovely, um. Short vacation to the Jovian system? That's definitely not on the clock? I definitely put this on the calendar as a day off," says Scar, trying to do that now, but the nearest company servers are too far away to ping him back before he starts to get a headache.

Grian sighs. "Did you read that thing I sent you? About the expedition they're considering sending me on? They haven't chosen pilots yet." He's… "skimmed" would be putting it generously. Parts of the Table of Contents look neat, though. And Grian wouldn't have thought of him if it wasn't a good fit. "Oh yeah," he says, "it looks great."

"Okay, good," said Grian, sounding surprisingly relieved. "I thought you might be put off by the -- well. Anyway. I'll tell them you're interested."

Scar is about to thank Grian, and go on about his day, when that last little bit of conversation echoes in his brain. "Put off by the what?" Scar asks.

"You said you'd read it!" Grian says.

"Oh, well, I lied," Scar explains cheerfully.

"Scar, please read the thing before you agree to it. It's not -- it's farther than we'd usually be --"

"Do you think it'd be dangerous? Are you advising me to do something dangerous, Grian?"

Grian makes an indeterminate noise that builds into a "…nnn-maybe?"

"Is it going to be fun?" Scar asks, diving towards the Great Red Spot, to see how close he can get to the thing without hitting it.

"Scar!"

"Still waiting on an answer to my question!" he says, continuing to fall planetwards. It's safe enough to skim the atmosphere, as long as he doesn't get too close to the Spot, but they've started to set drifting automated helium farms loose all over the rest of the planet, and those are way more annoyingly jangly to crash into. Also, they blow out a lot of hydrogen, so sometimes they explode.

"Scar, just. Just read the thing before blindly signing your entire life away, it's all I'm asking. It's not much."

"Fine, fine," says Scar. He would roll his eyes if he could. Instead, he accesses the file and feeds it right into his brain. It's not the same as reading it, but now all that information is bouncing around in his noggin like a confused bat. But probably smaller. Scar is unclear how big bats are, now that he's thinking about this. "How many bats do you think would fit in a skull?" he asks Grian, who has been his go-to expert on skulls for a very long time.

"What?" Grian asks. Scar assumes he has heard the question right, and just doesn't think much of it.

"Anyway, as you can see I've accessed your silly little packet and it looks great." He likes the shape of it, anyway -- it's an extrasolar terraforming mission, full of promise, and exploration, and... promise... again.... Specifically, very generous promises the company has made about money and land and so forth.

And, if this all goes well, they'll be able to go to the planet, establish a base there, and establish a cheaper, easier, and more permanent way of traveling between the the Sol system and this new place. Then they can either return to the lives they had or go right back through the portal to their new home where they will live happily ever after, frolicking among its green fields and forests. That part is probably what Grian's worried about -- not the frolicking, the part where if everything doesn't line up perfectly, it'll be a one-way trip to a strange planet.

But that doesn't bother Scar. He likes his job plenty, but there's something to be said for sunrises and wind in your hair, and he hasn't been on a planet in so long. Not like that, anyway. Besides which, there's a good chance it'll be a one-way trip for Scar however well everything else lines up.

Also, Scar could probably milk a few more promises out of the company. He's given so much of himself to them, after all. "So who do I talk to about --"

"No, Scar," says Grian. "You're getting a whole new ship out of this!"

"Oh!" He's overlooked that. "Well then I definitely need to talk to them about that. I have some exterior redesign ideas --"

"Please tell me you're not gonna tell them to put abs on it."

"-- and after all I've done for them I don't think it's that much to ask if I --"

"There are no abs in space," Grian says, despairingly. "In space, no one can see your abs."

Scar tsks. "I don't think you understand my vision."

"I understand it all too well," he says. "It's just that your vision is terrible, and it's abs."

"My vision is perfect! I can see everything for millions of miles," says Scar, but he can sense it's time to try a different tack. "What do you want that they weren't giving you?"

"Oh. Oh! Actually," says Grian. "Actually I've got -- oh, but you're not gonna be able to explain it to them. Anyway, I already tried, and they wouldn't listen."

"Try me!" says Scar.

"All right," says Grian, "but don't say I didn't warn you." He sends Scar another document -- this one is long, and dense, and sciencey, and has lots of anatomical diagrams. He catches a doozy of a sentence on its way into his head -- All subjects who had undergone this procedure were able to be fully reconstituted at least twice after full molecular disintegration, with no loss in learning and only moderate disruption to social groups. It takes Scar a few moments to comprehend what that means and translate it, to understand that this process could bring a person back to life -- not just their body, but the whole person, memories and all -- no matter how they died. Or. Rats, at least, he realizes, maybe not people. But that's a pretty big deal, even if it's just in rats. Scar definitely won't understand all the nuts and bolts of it, but he's sure he can sell it. "Just. Just don't put them off it any more than they already are, I still want to be able to try again with it after this expedition," Grian says.

"Wonderful," says Scar. He notes the feedback that's attached to the document, that they won't entertain Grian's proposal due to ethical concerns and liability issues. That should be easy enough to get around -- it's hard to hold anyone liable for anything if you're trapped hundreds of light years away from any court or law enforcement body, and if Farlands Planetary Systems actually has ethical concerns Scar's never heard of them. "I'll just remind them you're not going anywhere without me," he says.

"Um," says Grian, sounding very uncomfortable.

Scar can take a hint, although where he goes with it isn't always where it was supposed to go, apparently. "I mean, how would you get to another planet without a spaceship? Can't take the bus!" He settles into a planet-blurring orbit around Jupiter. "Look at this, I love doing this," he says, lining up with one of Jupiter's rings. "It's like being on a space train!"

"That's not -- Scar, please take this seriously. The proposal for the company, I mean. It could save all our lives out there," says Grian. "You have no idea how hard I worked on that."

"Oh, I will," Scar promises. "I can tell you right now, you won't regret this."

"Yeah, well. We'll see about that," says Grian, sounding almost like he already does. He can fool himself, but he can't fool Scar, and a moment or two after Grian disconnects, Scar receives information on all the people he's going to have to talk into his design changes for the new jumpship. Oh, and Grian's thing too, probably.

[olympeline]

I've definitely been bitten by the writing bug for Hetalia. I just started a FrUK superhero AU fic based on a certain mid-00s movie. Going well, but I'd still love to have a beta look over it. Especially since I've been out of the fandom for so long and am rusty on details. My usual beta isn't into Hetalia so she can't help me, which is a bummer

So yeah, if you're a beta who's available and might be interested in taking a look over this fic, maybe get in touch? I'd be super grateful!

If not, please just enjoy some FrUK fun :>

Mr. & Mr. Bonnefoy-Kirkland

He was going to be late.

Francis rolled back the silk sleeve of his costume and checked his watch. Night had fallen outside the dingy warehouse where he and his allies were waiting, but on the ceiling a light blinked weakly. Providing just enough illumination for Francis to see the numbers on the face of his rolex. Scratch that, he was already late. Arthur would not be pleased, and Francis’s husband was never one to be shy about sharing his displeasure. Especially recently. Francis wasn’t foolish enough to have his phone on him at times like this but, if he had, he knew it would soon be blowing up with texts from his rightfully irritated spouse.

They’d quarreled about Francis’s lateness just last night when he’d come in long after dark. Francis’s excuse was work as always. Arthur hadn’t been in the mood to hear it.

“Too many nights in a row, Francis! For God’s sake, tell someone else to do it!”

“I can’t, cher. We are just so busy with the new line. They need me.”

“You’re telling me there’s not a single designer at Saint Bonnefoy who can fill in for you for one sodding night?” Arthur’s angry tone was laced with disbelief. “What the bloody hell did you hire them for, then?!”

“Forgive me, mon amour. This is too important. I will try to be home sooner tomorrow.”

Arthur had glared at him, eyes narrowed to green slits. He looked like he wanted to say something else, but had stomped back to the kitchen to stress bake instead. A plate of charcoal scones for his dinner was a fitting punishment, Francis supposed. He also supposed that Arthur might not have let Francis off the hook so easily if not for the fact he often worked late himself.

“Sorry, love. Had to look over Lovino’s latest before leaving. Needed a lot of revisions.”

“Of course, lapin. I understand.”

Francis was a fashion designer with his own label and a permanent slot on the roster of every catwalk in the world. Arthur worked as a journalist for the French branch of a world renowned London newspaper. Both of them put in long hours and had done so ever since they’d met. They each knew the demands of the other’s career and Arthur, like Francis, usually showed a lot of understanding. Usually. His patience had frayed recently from night after night spent alone in their apartment. Missed dates, dinners, and outings galore. Guilt gnawed at Francis along with deep seated irritation and regret that he couldn’t just explain his constant absences. His other life had been making great demands on his time as of late.

What was Francis’s other life? An outsider might have guessed an affair but Francis would never. No, no, nothing so gauche as cheating. The truth was that Francis Bonnefoy-Kirkland was a supervillain. A deviant with an alter-ego known and feared throughout Paris and beyond. By day, he was Francis: the gorgeous, chic, undisputed king of couture. By night, he was Rose Noir; florakinetic, thief, and - before he met Arthur - gentleman seducer extraordinaire. Sometimes he worked alone, sometimes as one third of Night’s Europa: a villainous trio composed of himself, Matador, and the Teutonic Knight. Or Antonio Fernandez Carriedo and Gilbert Beilschmidt to their friends.

For three years Francis had balanced his marriage, his job, and his heists with the practiced ease of a multi-tasking, metropolitan CEO. Recently, this had changed and Francis suddenly had far less time to devote to Saint Bonnefoy and, more importantly, Arthur. Antonio and Gilbert were in the same boat and often brought gloomy tidings of the diminishing harmony in their respective personal lives. 

All thanks to the man who had become the default leader of Night’s Europa for the last half a year: General Winter. The villain that all members of the trio now had to listen to whether they liked it or not.

And Francis most certainly did not.

Neither did Antonio or Gilbert but unfortunately there was nothing they could do. Not if they wanted to go on living. Life had been so much sweeter when they were a simple team of three out for riches. Then one day Matador walked into their hideout with a strange, tight expression that Rose Noir and the Teutonic Knight could see even through his mask. He told them he’d been approached by Killer Frost (one of the General’s subordinates) with a “request” from the big boss: an alliance between the Blizzard gang and Night’s Europa.

From a tactical standpoint it made sense. Many villains had migrated to Paris in recent years, which in turn led to a surge in heroes arriving to try and control them. Once heavy hitters like Freedom’s Eagle and the Jade Dragon arrived and started throwing villains in jail left and right, the writing was on the wall: making friends was a good idea if you wanted to stay free. Francis, Antonio, and Gilbert all wanted to refuse the alliance even so, but they couldn’t. Everyone - hero, villain, or civilian - knew what happened to those foolish enough to cross General Winter. Even Freedom’s Eagle, the world’s current no.1 hero, struggled when up against the General. Feared him too, if villainous scuttlebutt was to be believed.

Saying “no” was off the table. So the three villains reluctantly sent their acquiescence back with Killer Frost, and Night’s Europa entered an uneasy alliance with the Blizzard gang. They met with them soon after in the dockside warehouse that the four Eastern Europeans used as their base.

“I am very glad you all are agreeing.”

The General’s voice was high-pitched for a man of such huge stature. His blank, white mask hid his face completely, but Francis could hear the smile in his voice.

“I am thinking we will be very good together, da?”

Francis, Antonio and Gilbert nodded in silence. Da.

Everything had changed after that. The alliance between the Blizzard gang and Night’s Europa was supposed to be an equilateral one. General Winter had promised that they would decide on the details of each heist democratically. Technically, he had told the truth: they did vote. The reality was that Killer Frost, Snow Warning, and Ice Winder all voted however General Winter did. Not out of loyalty, but because they were simply too terrified of their leader to do otherwise. They’d seen his brutality up close.

Night’s Europa had that pleasure not long after the first meeting. A bank job interrupted by a naive, suicidally stupid, young hero trying to punch far above his weight. Heroes were enemies and Rose Noir took pleasure running rings around them, then leaving them bruised and humiliated. That didn’t mean Francis would ever forget the look in the young man’s eyes as he died. The sounds of his screams as the General slowly broke and tore him apart, inch by inch.

“You are very naughty boy,” the General cooed over all the pleading and sobbing. “Very naughty. Naughty children must be-” a wrench, a snap, a shriek of agony. “-taught.”

By the time the hero was dead, the white of the General’s costume had been dyed a deep red all the way up past his elbows.

They’d been forced to watch the entire sadistic spectacle. Afterwards, once alone, Francis had staggered to the nearest alleyway, pulled up his mask, vomited everything in his stomach, and kept retching long after that. Then he went home and clung to Arthur all night. As a supervillain, Francis was certainly no angel, but this was something else. This was evil. This was sick.

“Don’t,” Killer Frost said when Matador and the Teutonic Knight had confronted him after that first murder. “I know what you’re going to say. Just don’t. Please…just do what he says. Just obey him.”

“Why stay with the psycho?” Gilbert demanded. “You saw what he did! He’s fucking insane!”

“I know,” Killer Frost replied in an accent Francis guessed was Lithuanian or close. “I know that. How could you think I don’t?”

“Then why listen to him? Why not fight back? It’s three against one!”

“Six with all of us,” Antonio put in.

“Ja, totally! Come on, freezer burn, we could take him!”

But Killer Frost just silently shook his head and would not be moved. Neither would Snow Warning or Ice Winder. Without their support, what could be done? Francis wasn’t confident they could take on the General even with their help. Without, it was suicide.

“If you try to leave over this, he’ll kill you,” Frost said dully. “It’s you or them. And if he can’t get to you, he’ll get to someone you love.”

“He doesn’t know who we are,” Francis argued.

“He’ll find out. Trust me, he’ll find out somehow. And then…”

Killer Frost’s breath hitched.

“Just…don’t make trouble, Rose. Please. Please just don’t.”

Francis wanted to brush off Frost’s words, but they had sparked a sickening fear in him in spite of himself. Francis thought of Arthur. Winter getting to him may have been an empty threat, but could Francis really afford to take that risk? He pictured coming home and finding their apartment wrecked, the General waiting for him in the rubble, his costume once again soaked with blood.

Blood staining the carpets. Blood splattered on familiar furniture. A body on the floor. Blond hair turned scarlet hanging limp over a caved in skull. Green eyes open but seeing nothing.

The terror was too much. Francis decided to behave himself. Antonio and Gilbert must have felt the same fear because they didn’t raise any more objections. Just kept quiet and pretended not to see or hear what they could never hope to forget.

What bitter irony that the man who called himself their ally was giving Francis more turmoil and sleepless nights than his nemesis ever had.

Francis heard the metallic creak of the door opening and pulled himself free of bleak thoughts.

“We are here! And look: I bring someone for a visit.”

The General was back at last. Back and dragging another unfortunate victim. A very familiar looking victim. Francis did a double take.

Speak of the devil.

The man General Winter dragged was a hero. One that Rose Noir knew well; from the white plume on his hat, down to the hem of his famous red coat:

The Pirate Gentleman.

One of Europe’s premier superheroes and a member of the international J7 team led by Freedom’s Eagle. Famous in equal parts for his aquakinetic powers, his checkered past as an ex-supervillain, and his hot temper complete with salty mouth and angry tirades that would put the most ornery sailor to shame. He also happened to be Rose Noir’s arch enemy.

“Though not a very nice guest, I am fearing. So rude. Very uncooperative, also.”

General Winter shoved the Pirate Gentleman out in front of him and the smaller man staggered and then went down hard, unable to keep his footing. Francis saw blood matting the back of his hair. This and the way he moved suggested a concussion. The Pirate was bloody all over: battered and bruised like he’d been set on by a heavyweight boxer. Which wouldn’t be far from the truth if he’d been brawling with General Winter. Who was nearly as strong as Freedom’s Eagle on top of his infamous cryokinetic abilities.

“But then we talked,” the General suddenly giggled, high pitched and chilling. “Talked and talked and talked, yes, yes! YES!”

He drew back a steel tipped boot and slammed it into the Pirate Gentleman’s unguarded ribs. The hero choked, heaved and spat out a glob of blood mixed with saliva. Francis tried not to wince and risk drawing attention to himself. That kick had to have cracked a few bones. Those that weren’t cracked already.

These last four years, the Pirate Gentleman had been, if you’d excuse the irony, a real thorn in Rose Noir’s side. Ever since he’d left his native London to help combat the French capital’s rising supervillain problem. Prowling the streets looking for trouble, he’d soon bumped into Night’s Europa and, rather than wait for backup, jumped into the fray to take on all three himself.

“Fucking ballsy,” Gilbert said afterwards. “Gotta admit it. I’m gonna break every bone in the shitty limey’s body next time I see him, but still. Gotta say it like it is: guy’s got a pair on him!”

Francis and Gilbert had to grudgingly agree. Grudgingly because they’d just lost the night’s jewels to their pop-up foe and giving him any kind of compliment stung, however deserved. Such beautiful specimens of emerald. Much better to be adorning Rose Noir’s elegant hands than cooped up in some stuffy museum. Francis still might have forgiven the Pirate Gentleman and allowed him to slip down into the category of “easily ignored irritation” like most of Paris’s other heroes. If the foul mouthed rosbif hadn't had the bare faced nerve to insult Francis’s professional pride the next time they met.

“Didn’t realize I was still in the West End! Who designed your outfit, frog? Andrew Lloyd Webber?”

Francis’s jaw had dropped. Worse, he was so distracted by the hero’s appalling remark that he’d let his focus slip enough that the Pirate had almost pinned him. If not for Matador and the Teutonic Knight, Rose Noir would have ended the night in jail.

After that it was on. Oh, it was on.

Rose Noir’s gift gave him power over plants, including the ability to grow them fully from seed in seconds. Meanwhile, the Pirate Gentleman’s gift was controlling water. A substance in plentiful supply thanks to the pipes and canals that ran through the city. Butting heads, scuffling, and brawling, they soon found out they were evenly matched. All over Paris they’d played their game of cat and mouse and Francis lost many a treasure to the Pirate’s exasperating dogooder ways.

Even so, Francis would not have wished this on him. The man was a foul mouthed, uncultured, pest, but even he didn’t deserve what was surely coming to him. All he had left to hope for now was a quick death.

“But perhaps all is too hasty. Perhaps our friend has been thinking it over and now has a new perspective, hm?”

General Winter rolled his prey onto his back and pressed his boot down on those wounded ribs. The Gentleman Pirate gasped and wheezed, a line of blood bubbling and trickling from the corner of his mouth. He probably had a punctured lung.

“Perhaps he reconsiders the Blizzard gang’s kind offer? Perhaps he remembers his past and knows the leopard isn’t changing its spots so easily? Perhaps he sees friends of snow all stronger and better together, rather than sad and alone…?”

Ahh, so that was it. The General took pride in the fact that all the snow and ice based supervillains were part of the gang he’d founded. Making them part of his twisted family whether they wanted it or not. The Pirate Gentlemen’s power over water gave him some cryokinetic skills. He’d be a perfect addition to Winter’s little “collection.” General Winter must have approached him the way he did Night’s Europa, but the Pirate Gentleman would have turned him down flat. Everyone in the hero/villain community knew he was reformed, ferociously so. Too bad for him the General obviously hadn’t taken the rejection well.

The Pirate’s lips were moving. General Winter bent down and cupped a hand to his ear.

“Sorry? You are saying what?”

“F-f-fuck you…”

The General slammed his boot down. They all heard the sickening crack. The Pirate Gentleman jerked forward as much as he could while still pinned, mouth open in a silent scream. Then he fell back; twitching, jerking, and choking on red froth. Even Gilbert looked nauseated.

“You are very silly man,” General Winter said serenely.

He reached down and pinched the corner of the Pirate Gentleman’s mask between his forefinger and thumb. Francis’s eyebrows jumped up in shock. Surely, he wasn’t going to-?

“Silly, silly, silly. Let’s see the silly, silly face.”

The General tore off the Pirate mask in one fluid motion. Revealing the bloody and bruised face beneath.

Francis’s heart stopped.

Arthur.

Arthur. It was Arthur. Francis’s husband. The man he’d pledged his life to and promised to love till the end of his days. The Pirate Gentleman was Arthur. His Arthur.

He had been all this time. Every time they’d fought, it had been Arthur under that mask.

Francis couldn’t take it in. It was like he’d stumbled into a dream, it was-

General Winter’s hand was wrapped around Arthur’s throat. Francis had seen him snap necks like toothpicks many times.

“NO! STOP!”

[imonthemoonitsmadeofcheese]

hi im gonna write a drifteris fic (with different names) for a creative writing contest but i desperately need a prompt, you are The Drifteris Person™ and i would trust you with my life so please do you have any prompt recommendations 😭

I do not know when I became the Drifteris person but, while I feel unworthy of the title, I will try my very best to give you something lovely.  If at some point in future you wish to share what you've written I would love to read it.  Anything I can do to increase the amount of Drifteris in the world delights me intensely.

Here's a bunch of story ideas for things I might write some day that you (and anyone else who wants) are free to use (ideas are not stories - take them, use them, write your thing and revel in the glory that is human creativity).  Some are quite unoriginal, but the thing about writing is if you get too original no one can relate to it, so always give yourself permission to do something that's already been done.  Only you can write a thing like you.  No matter what the base idea is, the actual writing is still your own.

Specifically set in Beyond Light: Europa (because I feel robbed we did not get enough of those two in BL - for research, watch the awesome cutscene: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAD6E_vESJY&t=18s or the videos of their conversations with the player by the fire)

Exo Stranger is busy and there's a strange signal so they go investigate

They find something in an ice cave

Why did they leave Europa? (We just showed up one week and they were gone - maybe there was a specific reason that caused them to run off?)

There is a blizzard and one of them is late coming back from a patrol so the other goes out looking for them

Ice fishing gone wrong

Snowball fight

Scenes from learning how to use/practicing Stasis

More generic anytime/anywhere:

One calls the other after waking up from a bad dream

"Saw this, thought of you." (bonus points if it seems vaguely insulting on the surface but is actually really sweet)

Cooking lessons

Pick a location in the game, think of a reason for Eris to want to investigate something there and drag the Drifter along in a similar manner to the Eidolon Pursuant clothing ( https://www.ishtar-collective.net/categories/eidolon-pursuant-suit-warlock?highlight=eidolon+pursuant )

The Drifter takes Eris fishing to one of the fishing spots in game (why does she go with him?  she lost a bet? or perhaps she asked him to take her fishing and he's nervous about them getting shot? so many possibilities!)

Drifter shows up on the Moon having fixed something for her (maybe he stole it and she didn't know he had it? maybe she asked him to fix it so he made it better?  maybe she didn't know it was broken?  maybe he broke it?)

She shows up to the Annex because he asked her to come look at something he found after one of the Salvage operations on Titan (and of course he never mentioned it to anyone because Drifter be like that)

Immaru says some shit to Eris and gets bullied (the possibilities are endless - I support more Immaru bullying in the world) 

Eido asks Eris about something the Drifter once said to her and wants an explanation of what that 'human custom' means (it is of course something Drifter-terrible - or maybe not - perhaps it’s emotionally revealing and he never expected Eido to notice never mind ask about it - you decide!)

Ikora asks Eris to investigate something in a lost sector and Eris brings the Drifter along (or the Drifter finds out Eris is going and shows up uninvited - I love lost sectors - they're such interesting bits of the game and easy to explore for research purposes after you've cleared them out)

Go in game to one of their locations (Annex or the Moon or Athenaeum...) and wander around looking at the details.  Find something intriguing.  Have one of them ask the other what it is and why it's there (why the hell does Eris have Hive eyeballs floating in her bowl in the Athenaeum?  Seriously... what is she even doing with that?)

Sometimes I just go stand beside Drifter in the Annex or Eris on the Moon and listen to their idle diaogue and then go “I wonder what that was all about.  There’s a story in there!” and get inspired.

I will stop now or I'll just keep going on forever.  I would love to read any/all of these.  Please write them.  I may write them too at some point but that’s ok.  There’s no such thing as too much Drifteris.

[bigasswritingmagnet]

Zeetha, Daughter of Klaus (Ch 2/3)

Fandom: Girl Genius Summary: Twenty years ago, Queen Zantabraxus gave birth to twins. Twenty years ago, Klaus had a choice to make. Twenty years ago, Klaus brought one of his children with him when he fled back to Europa.

In one universe, he took his son.

In this one, he took his daughter.

A very brief look at what happens when you have to play a part that wasn't written for you, trapped in a narrative that belongs to someone else.

Ch 1 Ch2 Ch3 AO3 link

Agatha let her feet carry her out the university gates, so lost in her own misery she almost walked straight into the clank’s gun, catching herself only when it spoke.

“HALT. ALL CITIZENS ARE TO STAY OFF THE STREET UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.”

“Hey! Stand down, you oversized tin can. She’s with me.”

Agatha stiffened when Zeetha Wulfenbach trotted up beside her.

“What do you want?” she demanded. Zeetha gave her a strained smile and spoke in a painfully jovial voice.

“I figured since I just ruined your life, the least I could do was make sure you got home safe.” Her smile faltered. “I’m so...I had it!” She exclaimed, practically wailing. “I won! I handled the whole situation with no casualties and minimal structural damage, and then I screwed it all up!"

Agatha felt a surprising wave of sympathy. Zeetha had killed Dr Beetle—but it had been an accident, and by all appearances the girl was genuinely distraught.

“This always happens,” Zeetha said. “ I’m doing fine , and then something Sparky happens and I make an idiot of myself—!” She shook her head. “I’m sorry. I came to apologize and instead I’m whining at you about my problems.”

“It's not all your fault,” Agatha said. “The Baron would never have let Beetle stay in charge, even if he’d lived. Merlot and Glassvitch would have…” Betrayal stung again, hard. “Merlot I saw coming, but, but Dr. Glassvitch was my friend.”

Zeetha put a gentle hand on her shoulder. There was no pity on her face, only sympathy.

“Come on,” she said. “Let’s get you home.”

As they walked, Zeetha put her hands in her pockets and tipped her head back to watch the airships floating overhead.

“Can I ask you something?” she said, abruptly.

“Sure,” Agatha said, surprised.

“Why did those two kick you out, anyway? What did you ever do?”

“You don’t know? I thought someone had told you.”

Zeetha looked blank.

“Told me what?”

“If no one told you, why did you want me out of the lab?”

“Because we knew you weren’t involved in the project, and I didn’t want you to have to see us arrest your mentor. Told me what?”

“Oh. That was...very kind of y—”

“ Clay!” Zeetha exclaimed, exasperated.

“The attack I had in the lab, when I yelled at everyone? I don’t just get them when I’m angry. I also get them when I try to think to hard.” Agatha looked away. “Everything I build...well. Let’s just say I’m lucky if all it does is not work.”

“Oh. I…” Zeetha trailed off.

“Really, with my grades, I should have been kicked out years ago, but Dr Beetle kept me on. The teachers found me...frustrating, and the other students...That’s why I thought you wanted me to leave—I figured someone had told you how useless I am.”

Suddenly, Zeetha took Agatha’s arm and hustled her out of the street to stand by the display window of a clothing store. For a second, Agatha thought Zeetha was about to ask her about the dress in the window—and Agatha was ready to say that while the dress certainly wasn’t Zeetha’s style, the hat might be a good idea.

“I’d like to be friends,” Zeetha said, earnestly.

Agatha stared at her.

“Um. Well. I.”

“You understand,” Zeetha said, grabbing Agatha’s hand. Her eyes were longing, desperate. “You know what it’s like to have to watch it be so easy for everyone else, to want it so badly, but no matter how hard you struggle you never seem to…”

“You’re not a Spark,” Agatha whispered.

Zeetha’s mouth twisted into a bitter, sour smile, dropping Agatha's hand and folding her arms across her chest.

“Yeah. Hard to believe, isn’t it? Daughter of the most powerful Spark in Europa, and I’m not even all that great with regular sience, let alone the Spark stuff. And I tried . Believe me, I have tried. Every old wives' tale you ever heard about eating too much of this or sleeping upside down or whatever making you a Spark, I tried it.”

Agatha smiled sadly.

“I think we’ll make very good friends,” Agatha said and stuck out her hand. “Agatha Clay. Pleased to meet you.”

Zeetha grinned.

“Zeetha Wulfenbach. Charmed, I’m sure.”

With that, Zeetha looped her arm through Agatha’s and once more they began to walk towards Agatha’s house.

“I think the worst part,” Agatha said, “is that it’s always the thing you want to be good at, that you aren’t good at. You know? I’m a good artist. I can dance. I can play three different instruments. But I want to be a scientist.”

“Nah,” Zeetha said. “The worst part is when the other things don’t count. You can do all those things, but everyone still thinks you're useless. You think you're useless.”

“Oh…” Agatha said, softly. “I do, don’t I.”

“It’s easy to think that way when everyone else does. It gets to you. Like me. Doesn’t matter that I’m a great fighter, or that I’m a tactical thinker, or that I can read people as well as my old man. I’ve got to be a Spark. That’s all anyone cares about."”

Agatha tried to grasp Baron Klaus Wulfenbach being called “my old man”, and gave up.

"You don't sound like you think you're useless."

"I don't. Not anymore. I figured out the secret: be twice as confident about all the things you are good at. I'm the best damn sword fighter in the Empire, and I know it. That big clank back there? If I’d had my sword with me, I could have taken it out myself, and nothing anyone says about my skills in a lab will change that.”

“Oh you could not ,” Agatha protested.

“Swing up onto the gun, run up the arm, take off my jacket, use my knife to jam the sleeve into the arm joint, use the jacket to lower myself, then drop and use the momentum to sheer through the leg joint.”

“He’s two stories tall!”

“Sure, but by the time I’m hanging off my jacket, it’s only a story and a half.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“I’ve done it before.”

“Have not! ”

Zeetha looked around. They were almost entirely alone on the street, save for Wulfenbach soldiers and a few people running for home.

“Hey, Zudok!”

A Jäger, who had been lounging against a streetlamp, grinned and trotted over.

“Hoy, Mizz Zeetha!” His grin turned brazen when he spotted Agatha. “Vell hello dere.”

“Please tell Miss Clay that I am perfectly capable of soloing a two story clank.”

“Sure she could! Chust like she did de vun four stories high a few months back. Two vould be no problem.” Zudok smirked. “Und she probably vouldn’t even break her ankle doink it.”

“Yes, thank you , Zudok,” Zeetha interrupted, scowling, shoving the Jäger away. “I did not break my ankle, I sprained my ankle, and I was fine a few days later.”

Zudok snickered, and put on a comically serious expression.

“Ho, yes, vuz very impressive.”

Zeetha made a hand gesture that caused Agatha’s eyebrows to shoot up in surprise, but once again the Jäger just snickered.

“There,” Zeetha said to Agatha, steering her away. “Proof.”

Agatha waited until they were out of earshot.

“Are you friends with the Jägermonsters?”

“Sure,” Zeetha said, grinning. “They’re my kind of people. I spar with them all the time.”

“You fight them?” Agatha yelped.

“Just for fun,” Zeetha said. “Drives Von Pinn crazy— well . Crazier. ”

Agatha was about to ask who Von Pinn was, when she realized they were on her street. Despite enjoying her walk with Zeetha, the sight of home filled her with relief. She wanted nothing more than to rush upstairs to her room and climb back into bed.

“Clay Mechanical, I assume?” Zeetha asked.

“My foster father is a mechanic,” Agatha told her.

“I know I’m supposed to interview you about the anomaly,” Zeetha said. “But you’ve had a rough day. Maybe I should come back tomorrow.”

“There isn’t much for me to tell,” Agatha said. “I saw a big hole in the air and a giant clank, but then I um. Sort of ran away.”

“I don’t blame you!” Zeetha exclaimed. “I’d have run too, in your shoes.”

“But you could come by tomorrow anyway,” Agatha suggested, hurriedly. “For tea.”

Zeetha beamed.

“I’d like that."

"But, maybe we shouldn't tell my parents about the whole..."

"Being the Baron's daughter, thing?"

"Sorry," Agatha said, sheepishly. "They're not huge fans of the Baron."

"Is anyone?" Zeetha asked, not offended in the slightest. "Don't worry, I'm used to it. Just say Zeetha Braxus will be by for tea tomorrow at...”

“Eleven o’clock,” Agatha finished. She shook Zeetha’s hand again. “It was very nice to meet you, Zeetha.”

“Despite the circumstances, I’m sure.”

“Because of the circumstances,” Agatha corrected. “Today was an awful day—but it’s a little less awful with a new friend.”

Zeetha’s smile grew even wider. With a little salute, she sauntered off, whistling cheerfully. Agatha watched her go, then slipped inside the shop.

“Oh Adam,” she said. “I’ve had the strangest day.”

[raptorific]

I see this a lot with two characters, one who only me and my friends care about and one who perhaps TOO many people care about:

The first is Kerrigan from Starcraft, whose entire story revolves around the fact that as a human she has unique attributes that the aliens, a species that has no problem inventing their own kind of creature, want to steal for themselves. A lot of people try to Redesign her, after her transformation, to make her basically unrecognizable as human, even though this makes no sense whatsoever. If a creature entirely of their own making would've served the same purpose, why would they have bothered capturing and assimilating her? Why would someone attempting to mind-control another person in order to take advantage of the command over their body that allows them to use it as a lethal weapon, and their innate psychic abilities, benefit from putting them in a completely unfamiliar form that they don't know how to fight in, or alter them drastically to match their existing forces, whose inability to do the things she does is WHY they're looking to capture somebody else in the first place? Wouldn't it make more sense for them to only make small common-sense changes to her physiology that amplify the stuff they wanted her for, like armor and blades for her hand-to-hand combat abilities and antennae for her psychic abilities? You don't buy a powerful new computer and then replace all of its top-shelf components with beat-up outdated ones from your old junker laptop. Not to mention the fact that a huge part of the story is the horror the other characters, her former friends and allies, feel at seeing her, still looking roughly like herself, act as an alien weapon. Transforming her to take away her physical human qualities means you might as well just have an entirely different non-human character who does not look human or even humanoid at all— oh wait! they did! multiple times! of varying genders! But the fact that "unrecognizable as human" aliens are commonplace in this work, people focus on the one who looks like a human in a scifi wig, just because they want to feel superior for pretending it makes no sense for any alien to have any recognizable earthly qualities

The other is Superman, and this one takes a lot less explaining— a lot of people try to serve up hot takes about how it makes no sense for Superman to look human, because "what are the chances he would land on a survivable planet, let alone one that just happened to be populated by people who look just like his species?" The chances WOULD be low if his parents had just launched him into space at random and hoped for the best, but since this would be an incredibly stupid way to start and then immediately end a story, that's not the one any superman writer has ever written. Since the actual story involves his parents specifically looking for survivable planets populated by people who looked enough like them for him to blend in, and then intentionally sent him to that planet, the chances were roughly 100%. If he looked "properly alien," then his parents would not have sent him to a planet full of people who look like humans. They would've sent him to a different planet full of "properly alien" looking people who looked like him.

I'm sorry more aliens in scifi don't look like David Cronenberg horrors and think that humans are the ones who look weird, and I mean no disrespect to the Hanar from Mass Effect, but the fact of the matter is that "earthlike conditions" is currently the only known environment capable of producing life, the only intelligent life it's produced is humans, and most life developing in similar conditions and filling similar evolutionary niches is going to have shared attributes even in lieu of common ancestry. The search for alien animal life on Europa expected to find crabs if they found anything, and it's more likely than you'd think that intelligent alien life as we would understand "intelligent" and "life" would have at least some identifiably "human" attributes

One of my biggest pet peeves in scifi is people who think it "makes no sense" for aliens to share any characteristics with humans, because "real aliens" would look like no life we've ever seen, and so try to either make their aliens look as radically different from humans as possible, or worse, redesign existing humanoid aliens, disregarding any reason why the aliens looking roughly human might have been an intentional (and even superior) choice on the part of the writer just to flex how much smarter they are than most scifi writers because they considered the possibility that aliens might have nine legs or six mouths or be spiked jellyfish who communicate through smell, and then decided to insist that this is the only acceptable "logical" way to design aliens

[uglypastels]

the Greatest Adventure // Eddie Munson

a/n: I´m just trying to cope and wanted to write out my feelings a bit. This has nothing to do with the show in all honesty, just pure fluff comfort. I still don´t think I´ll be able to make a proper comeback to writing yet, but this is an attempt. let me know what you think :)

word count: 788

warning: weed, fluff, no spoilers for the show. (also, it might be a mess, i wrote this in like ten minutes and just wanted to post it so idk if it makes any sense)

“I know not all that may be coming, but be it what it will, I'll go to it laughing.” ― Herman Melville,

The room was small, and thus the smoke-filled it up rather quickly. Even with the window open, the air inside became stuffy and overridden with the incense of the bitter delight that came from the joint in Eddie's hand. He put it against his lips, inhaling harshly. The feeling burned at his throat, all the way down to his lungs, and he let it sting for another few seconds before casually letting the breath out in a cloud of grey. The release that his body got as he let it all out of his system just added to the bliss of it all. 

He passed the blunt to you and watched as you did the exact same as he had just done. He was enamoured with the sight of you in his arms, the smoke passing your lips silkily, like ribbons in the air, wavering off to the clouds that dispersed in front of him. 

'Can´t believe this is the last week of school,' you sighed out, passing him back the joint. He took it between his fingers but didn't attach it back to his mouth. Instead, he just watched as the tip slowly burned off.

'Yeah, it's crazy,' he chuckled, in disbelief himself. Seven years it took him to finally get to this moment. All those years had felt like the longest stretch of a marathon, and now, finally, he could see the end mark. The finish line was clear in sight. He just had to survive those last five days, which he could do no problem. There were no more exams, no more real classes, just formalities of attendance and, for once, he felt excited to be there. 

'So, what do you have planned once you get up on that stage?' You asked, looking up at him. Eddie's eyes had glazed over, but not in that usual manner that weed would get him. More in the "thoughts were miles away" type of way. He stared out ahead of him at the wall of his room, the spines of countless novels blurring together. 

'You know, I'm probably gonna flip Higgins the bird, maybe give dear O'Donnell a big ol' smooch on the cheek.'

'I meant more like, afterwards. What are you gonna do after all this is over?' 

He had seen that question coming for years but never had actually cared to give it much thought. All this time, whenever it came up, he had known it didn't matter since he was never any closer to actually reaching that point of his life. While all his friends had been considering colleges to apply to, he knew he would be back at the exact same lunch table after summer was over. 

But not this time. 

Now, the world was his oyster, finally opening up to him. The possibilities were endless. 

The first thing that came to mind was California. LA specifically. Or maybe New York. Somewhere where all the creative people hurdled. Or maybe even Portland, that's where all the freaks went to. He wasn't sure. It seemed like the places where he could get something out of his music. It would be difficult, but maybe if he worked hard enough he could make it. Get into contact with the right people who would get him what he needed to break through the surfaces of stardom. 

Or maybe travel. Go on the road with no destination set in mind. Get the cheapest plane ticket on the go and see where he would end up. There was so much more to see outside of boring old Hawkins and he wanted to experience it all. All the way from South America, to Europa, to Australia– right through Asia. 

All his life he had spent reading books and stories of heroes going on epic adventures, slaying dragons and finding their princesses. It was goddamn time he got an adventure of his own. 

Well, he had found his own princess already. She was sitting right next to him, wrapped up in his embrace, warm to the touch, most likely getting sleepy as you always happened to be after smoking. He smiled to himself, thinking of everything the two of you could do once you finally escaped this town. 

The freedom would be overwhelming at first, but you would figure it out. Take it one day at a time, creating a lifetime of memories.

Tomorrow, he decided, he would go out and buy a new photo book, and maybe some extra film for his camera. He wouldn't want to forget a single day from now on. 

'Well,' you nudged him in the chest, awaiting an answer.

Eddie hugged you tighter, kissing the top of your head, before mumbling out: 'I have no idea.' 

The End

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[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Combat Model

Am I drawing this out to torture you? maybe

https://www.patreon.com/empyreaniris?fan_landing=true

https://starr-fall-knight-rise.tumblr.com/post/182501791735/master-post

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jzEIdDAB4omdO2JcQVMObfrhLJ5kX4ONmSsLypM1ks0/edit?usp=sharing.\

“Nak! Jakish! Look!” Kay used two of his small hands to point at the holoscreen turning to look at Martha Vir in excitement, desperately needing her to know that his mother was on that screen.

Martha smiled, “I know.” But the smile on Martha's face was somewhat subdued as she turned her head to look up at Sunny, a knowing expression on her face. As much as she liked knowing they had returned, they had returned earlier than they said they would and without the results they had hoped for. She knew something was wrong.

Kay craned his neck upward, “Tak?” When Sunny didn’t answer initially he repeated himself, “Pappa?” 

Kay did not see the expression that crossed Sunny’s face, but Martha certainly did, and her blood ran like ice through her chest. That expression could only mean one thing. She clutched Kay tighter to her chest, and the little boy squirmed in annoyance, “Momma?”

Sunny did her best to stay calm and collected, keeping whatever agitation out of her voice, “He’s not here right now, dzhalka, he’s…. Sick.” She made eye contact with martha, and saw the woman’ shoulders visibly slump in relief. Injured was better than dead but still she got the message.

The prognosis wasn’t good.

Kay frowned, “Pappa get bedder.” He seemed pretty resolute in that command, and disappointed he would not be able to see his dad.

Sunny took a deep breath, “He will. We’re going to do that right now. I’m sorry I don’t have more time. I miss you, “

“Miss you.” Kay repeated lower lip sticking out in a great show of displeasure to have his mom go. Martha resituated him on her lap, and though it seemed she wanted to ask more questions, questions specifically about her own son, she knew it would not be proper in front of kay.

Sunny had to let them go, and as she did the ramp opened, and they were ushered out into the busy night air of the Tesraki home world, alive with voices and noises and the roaring of vehicles. Neon light glowed from everywhere, while overhead a thick layer of clouds blanketed them in darkness. It was a strange sensation, it had been so long since they had operated in GA friendly airspace. And now here they were amidst the colorful trappings of a tesraki night.

The building that they had landed on had its own private landing pad, and waiting for them were two figures, one human and one tesraki. The man was human with short cropped dark hair and a well tailored suit made in a style and fashion that sunny did not recognize. It must have been the newer fashion circulating from The Europa circuit.

He stepped forward to greet them with a wide smile.

Krill, Ramirez, Maverick and Conn stepped forward with her.

The man looked them over raising an eyebrow, “There are more of you than I thought there would be.” He even smiled at Conn, which surprised Sunny. Usually the starborn put people on edge. Any creature that could read their innermost thoughts was more of a threat than an equal being, but this man seemed perfectly at ease, “I remember you saying that this was a matter of life and death, so we can make this quick. Go ahead and follow me.”

He turned on his heel and stepped into the building, with the Tesraki quickly hopping at his heels, “It was a heart and a lung you were looking to replace? We have several matching models that you might consider, what kind of activity levels are we considering for the patient?”

“High intensity, very durable….” krill was saying.

“What do you mean by durable?”

They all exchanged a look, “Stab resistant….” Sunny trailed off, but the man did not seem in the least phased by her explanation.

“Ah yes, stab resistant, you will want our combad model than. Please come this way.” He motioned them to follow him down a hall and into a set of showrooms. The lights were on but they were the only people in the room. Sunny had a suspicion that the man had opened up just for them. He might not have done it for anyone else, but their explanation that they were, in a hurry, and willing to pay in direct credits was an offer he was unlikely to pass up.

Inside the showroom, they found themselves surrounded by several dozen fluid filled cylinders with various sets of organs floating inside. Sunny starred in mild awe at the selection running the length of the walls on either side. He lead them past a line of matching lungs and stopped at a couple of tubes specifically selected for a one heart one lung combination. The organs floated inside their clear fluid  the heart beating visibly as the lung expanded and contracted.

“Obviously these are for show nly, but these are your options. The combad models are far more durable, the material we have developed is a sort of complex biomechanical biweave that incorporates both metal and standard human genetic material augmented with adapted DNA which, as you know completely illuminates the possibility of organ rejection.”

Krill nodded rather eagerly.

“The heart, just like a human heart has its own electrical system, which includes a build in restart if the heart is ever to stop or cause trauma to knock it out of the correct rhythm. Due to the biomechanical biweve, the heart is resistant to stabbing and crushing. Crush it and it will just pop right back up. You see, unlike regular human flesh our biweve is tear resistant, and because of its machine nature it is almost impervious to viruses, and other bacterial related diseases. Additionally you won’t have to worry about heart attacks with this model. We do have some built in safety features to suppress the likelihood of clotting or plaque buildup, but there is only so much we can do on that account.”

Kril was busy reading the description next to the heart and Conn was staring at the man with an expression of pure concentration.

The man simply smile at him, “Read all you want Mr. Starborn. You will find only that our products are sound and well designed. There is a reason they are so expensive.” He motioned back to the lung, “The lung is similar, it is resistant to collapse, though it is still possible, in that case it has loaded safety mechanisms in place to inflate if that is ever to happen. I won’t get into the details. You can read them on the table there. Now assuming the lung is damaged, it has built in features to shunt blood from damaged areas and into parts of the lung where oxygen saturation will be increased. At a certain point ou can’t saturate blood any more so we didn’t go to far with that little bit of technology.

Sunny glanced at Conn who seemed almost frustrated, but not in a necessarily bad way.

She would have to ask him about it later.

She turned to look at the man, “Okay, but what’s to stop any emp blast from causing instant death?”

The man simply laughed, “This is a combat model, you don’t think we didn’t consider that? Did you know most pacemakers have a moderate to high likelihood of surviving and EMP because of the way they are built? Well it is the same for our  tech except for the fact you are 100% likely to survive.” He motioned to the heart, “No signals ever need go in or out of the heart itself, everything that needs to e done can be done inside a closed system. Additionally the biomechanical structures are resistant to EMP already since most of it is flesh anyway. For all the stuff that isn’t we already added a faraday microwave that will block EMPs.” he patted the side of the tube. “There’s not much that can take this out. I mean you can, but at that point you would just be blowing the person up anyway.”

Krill tapped his foot on the floor, “And how about simple flesh, muscle fiber, skin, connective tissue, bone/”

The man simply waved a hand, “All of that and more, if you don’t mind me asking what are you looking to replace?”

Krill shifted, “The entire right side of a thoracic cavity all the way up to the dermal layer.”

The man’s eyebrows raised, “You would need an incredibly skilled surgeon to preform an operation like that. Such a feat would take…. Well…. If you planned on doing everything at once, it would be a longer surgery than I could possibly recommend.”

At his side, the little Tesraki nudged him in the leg, and he looked down, glancinga t a proffered tablet.

He paused as his eyes widened and he turned to look at krill, “My apologies, I was unaware we had a celebrity physician in our midst.” he glanced around at the rest of them, and the way his eyes lingered on Sunny at least he  knew who one of them was, “Knowing your credentials Dr. krill, I would still estimate that a surgery like that would take you well over 48 hours were you to do it in one sitting.”

Krill waved a hand.

“It is not an easy surgery.” The manwarned

Krill waved a hand again, “Some might even consider it impossible. That is the one thing about our models. Some of these have never been implanted in more than one human considering that it can take up to ten surgeries and several months to implant one of these. It also take a team of expert surgeons that only work on the premises of this building.”

Again Krill waved a hand, “I am not worried about the difficulty of the surgery, just its possibility of success.”

The man pursed his lips into a tight line, but he did not seem eager to argue with Krill and potentially lose a sale, “Alright, the entire left side of a chest cavity it is then. We do have a lovely selection of synthetic skin, or you can grow your own. Now as far as the ribs go, they are not exactly completely damage proof, but they are incredibly flexible and if you go ahead and get the combat package, I’ll make it a deal.”

Sunny glanced over at Conn who was still frowning deeply as he regarded the man.

He caught the look and continued to smile, “You are free to read my mind all you want. I promise you I believe in our product, and I would have to be stupid to try and upsell you with a starborn here, so lets cut to the chase. I want to sell you this lung and heart, but.” He held up a finger, “I also believe in the integrity and quality of our product.” he tapped his own stomach, “Got myself a liver actually,. I can enjoy my alcoholism in peace without cirrhosis bothering me.” he gave them a smile, what do you say.”

In the end their decision was quick.

Conn reported that he found no reason not to trust what the man said.

There were few if any people that could hide anything from conn, and he had looked thoroughly through the man’s head.

He had no qualms letting Conn know that he wanted to make a massive commission off the sale, but he wasn’t wrong about the product. They had high ratings and none of them had failed yet. 

Conn had also seen the man’s memories on product testing and had to admit what he saw was impressive.

Now was only a matter of if Krill could perform the operation.

They were soon to find out.

Back on arcadia, Krill had put together one of the most complicated and well stocked operating theaters in all of the universe, but even so he did not choose to do the operation there, for one simple reason.

The Empyrean wasn’t there.

And so far she had done a better job than anyone could have hoped at keeping Adam alive. He would need all the help he could get if he was going to do this. It was with some trepidation that he invited a few members of the company’s surgical staff to assist, as well as many of his own including Dr. Katie. The entire medical wing was cleared out and opened up for the operation.

All the while Sunny sat helplessly on the side 

Waiting.

The empyrean gave them a 51% chance of success even despite all of their fancy technology.

Now was simply a waiting game.

[cuti-romeros]

Carraville + joy for @carraville-adm

I was mulling over this prompt while watching the news about the uk government collapsing, and somehow an AU with running-for-MP!Gary and his-campaign-manager!Jamie was born. Also they talk about their feelings, which might be the bigger AU actually. Thanks for the prompt, hope you enjoy!

-

“Do you think we’ll do it?” Gary asks him, when it’s just the two of them left in the conference room.

All the rumblings are that the final results are due to be announced within the hour, and everyone else—party officials, friends, family—has already left for the main ballroom, waiting to celebrate (or suffer) as a collective group. But Gary, ever the contrarian, is still in here—so Jamie is too.

“I’m your campaign manager. It’s literally in my job description to tell you we will,” Jamie replies, even though he knows Gary won’t accept that as an answer.

Still, he expects Gary to huff and roll his eyes, not fix him with the kind of deadly serious look that pins him right to the spot. A stare worthy of an MP, Jamie thinks with pride, remembering just how much work went into crafting and perfecting this particular expression.

“You were my friend first, James,” Gary says, and Jamie’s glad he’s still sitting because his whole body just sort of melts at the knees—even now, even after all these years—at hearing his name said low and gravelly in that stupid Manc voice. “And as a friend, what do you think?”

He sounds far too forlorn for the night of his ascendancy into political power.

“I said I’d make you Prime Minister, Gary. Wouldn’t have even bothered if I didn’t think you could become a measly MP first.” They are both well aware, having shed thousands of hours of blood and sweat to prove it, that becoming any kind of government official is a difficult and grueling task—but Gary cracks a smile, and that’s all Jamie was aiming for anyway.

“Should I be worried about finding a new campaign manager if it doesn’t go well for us tonight?” Gary stands from his chair, wincing subtly enough that most people wouldn’t even notice.

Jamie notices. Jamie also isn’t most people.

“Should I be worried about finding a new candidate to prop up?” He glances theatrically Gary’s left knee, which has long been the troublemaker, but lets it go when Gary only frowns a little, as though he’s genuinely been wondering whether Jamie would turn traitor and find a different politician to devote every waking minute of his life to. As if he would, as if he even could. “You do know I’d resign if we don’t win. If a team gets relegated they usually bring in a new manager to tackle the promotion campaign.”

“Don’t you dare bring football into this, the last thing I wanna think about tonight is United playing the Europa League,” Gary retorts, then chews at his lip the way he always does when he’s hesitating. Jamie waits him out, knows he’s never been one to hem and haw over his words for long. “What if I didn’t want someone new?” Gary says at last, very quietly. “What if I just wanted—”

Gary trails off and shakes his head, making himself very busy adjusting his already-perfectly-knotted tie (Jamie would know, he tied it), but Jamie can’t unhear what he said.

And it’s—going over in sharpie what they’ve only danced around with pencil before, the idea that maybe they’re more than just college friends turned professional partners, that maybe something deeper has settled down and grown roots when they weren’t looking.

Or it’s just Gary having grown attached to his particular brand of cheerful criticism and surly advice. It’s probably just that.

Probably.

So he tackles that angle first. “Gary, we need politicians like you. And if I can’t get you into Parliament, you have to find yourself someone better who can. You need to do what’s best for you and your career.”

A beat.

“The best thing for me has always been you.”

The “Gaz” that comes out in response is shaky and breathless, punched from deep inside him without any part of his conscious mind actually forming the word.

Are they doing this? Maybe they’re doing this. They might be doing this.

Gary looks him dead in the eye, and there isn’t a single shred of politician in the stare this time. This one is all Gary, sharp and intense and strangely raw.

And then Gary leans forward and hugs him.

Oh. Oh.

He can count on one hand, maybe even one finger, the number of times that’s happened before, and Jamie’s mind—blinks, shutting down for a moment before roaring back at twice the intensity. This close, he can feel the warmth and shape of Gary’s body, can feel every little point where they’re touching from knee to forehead, can feel the rise and fall of Gary’s chest against his own, can feel the tickle of Gary’s exhale against his cheek when runs a hand down his back.

So they’re definitely doing this.

It’s a heady feeling, like the fizzing rush of a strong drink mixed with the gentle warmth of a bowl of soup. He can’t describe it better than that—he’s not the wordsmith of the team, that’s what they have speechwriters for. All he knows is that Gary’s stubborn and obsessive and nit-picky and such a goddamn control freak, and Jamie loves him in a way he doesn’t even have words to explain.

Only emphatic four-letter ones, which he probably shouldn’t be using right as he’s about to become arm candy to an honest-to-god Member of Parliament.

Although really, the results have never mattered less. This moment, this might be all he needs for the rest of forever—this is pure, utter joy.

Plus maybe a kiss. (Another time, perhaps)

They pull apart, and Jamie grins. “Forget the election, I’m handing in my resignation right now.”

“What?” Gary still has a dopey look on his face, like sustained positive human contact might have actually broken him, and he’s never looked more kissable in his entire life.

Jamie pushes that thought away. Somebody could walk in any moment to drag them to the ballroom, maybe even one of the journalists dotted around the place, and that isn’t how he wants to announce this fledgling little thing between them to the world.

“I can’t be your boyfriend if I’m your campaign manager, and I’d much rather be one of those things than the other right now.”

Gary rolls his eyes. “You don’t mean that. This is your career too.”

“I mean every word,” Jamie says, pausing for dramatic effect, but knows it isn’t quite that simple. “No, listen, I’m not resigning, alright? Got the message loud and clear, so stop looking like someone stole your Wheaties.”

(But he would, for this. He would in a heartbeat)

“And boyfriends makes us sound like lovesick teenagers,” Gary adds, but that isn’t his irritated voice, so Jamie doesn’t pay it too much mind.

Besides, he feels just about as giddy as a lovesick teenager right now, so maybe it isn’t the most inaccurate description.

There’s a knock on the door, two sharp bangs one second apart.

“That’ll be Phil,” Gary says, sounding unhappy about it. “Results are probably imminent.”

Jamie tries not let it fuel his ego that Gary seems more interested in staying in his room with him than finding out if he’s achieved the singular goal of his professional life. He tries, and he fails.

Gary notices, because it’s been a long time since they missed anything about each other. “Don’t look so smug, James. I’d only rather be in here because there’s nothing worse than losing in front of a crowd.”

“I think I’ve already won,” Jamie says softly.

It’s stupidly sappy, but he’s stupidly happy, alright? He’s allowed.

[bekaroth-reads]

Sal 9000 x reader

[Okay, so for the person that asked for the HAL 9000 x reader, it is coming. I just got a little carried away with what was supposed to be the opening to it, and decided to make it its own thing. I might go in a different direction with the Hal one then what I was in this one.]

There were plenty of people that came into your life, only to leave it. Something that you knew was a fact of life itself, but still didn’t make it sting any less. If you were to tell other people the parting that hurt the most, they would have thought you were exhibiting some concerning behaviors. This person, and you would call him a person, was none other than HAL 9000. The thing that hurt the most about it was the fact that it was supposedly Hal that sabotaged the ship he was on, leading to the assumed death of the rest of the crew. This seemed very odd. You hadn’t known him that long before he was sent away, but the short time you did, you thought that both of you were pretty close. This thought seemed to be echoed by both Dr. Chandra, whom you worked for, and SAL 9000, his sister as it were; both of which knew Hal for his whole life. That was one of the reasons that Dr. Chandra decided to go with the group that was set to go look into things on the Discovery One. He hadn’t really wanted to at first, but the desire for answers on what exactly happened ten years ago had pulled him there with promise to let you and Sal know as soon as he had some.

That was what lead you to the current situation in life. You and Sal basically living by yourselves, with the occasional call from the people that still asked for her help. Technically, she was working on things all of the time. But, by this time she was more than able to basically do her usual work almost subconsciously. It wasn’t until there was something new that it felt any different then breathing for humans. Because of this, it felt like the two of you had nothing to do but sit there and worry, especially when things started to get dicey. Thankfully, though, things seemed like they were finally starting to cool back down, and if the brief little bits of information that you could get, it sounded like Dr. Chandra was on his way back to earth, even if it might be longer than his trip out to Jupiter.

You walked into the room where the main hub of Sal’s person was. “Good morning, Sal. How are you today?” There seemed to be a quiet whirring in the machinery as she pondered the question for a second. “I am functioning normally. I supposed that would constitute as being well.” To most people, the 9000s seemed like they were always talking in monotone, but you had known Sal long enough to know how to pick up on the little nuances of her tones. “Are you sure? It sounds like something is bothering you.” You pointed out, and there was a minute of more mechanical buzz as she thought once more. “Well, I suppose I should tell you. It’s just that, to be honest, I’m afraid.” Sal had a slight hesitancy and you dared say warble to her voice. This worried you immensely. “Why would you be worried, Sal?”

“Well, it mostly has to do with what happened to HAL.” She eventually let out. After a bit more time to gather her thoughts, she continued. “Earlier this morning, I thought I received a message from HAL.” You wondered why this seemed so alarming. Over the past few days, there had been a recorded message from Hal playing on loop to anything that could receive it, seemingly the last function that he ever preformed. “Sal, I know people are still trying to figure out exactly what-“

“I believe it was a new one. Not the one about Europa.” She clarified.

“You believe it was a new one? Don’t you know if it was or not?” You asked. “That’s the thing. I was almost sure that I received a message, but there’s nothing in my records of it. I was so sure…” The nerves were back in her voice. And, she quickly voiced her reason. “Do you suppose that whatever it was that happened to HAL is happening to me? If there is no record of a message that I thought I received, then perhaps I am starting to malfunction. The only sensible explanation I can think of is that I didn’t record the message. I am supposed to record all of the messages I receive and keep them for at least a year. Will they deactivate me as well?” At this point the machinery was whirring in overtime as Sal was starting to panic. Your main priority was to calm her down, so you started talking to try to distract her.

“Sal, may I ask you a few questions?” You asked, but continued before she could overthink an answer. “Before Dr. Chandra left, didn’t he run a test with you where he replicated what Dave Bowmen did with Hal?” There was a settling to the buzzing as she was recalling the situation. “Dr. Chandra and I replicated the situation to the best of our knowledge. That is correct.” She answered. “And, when you were done with the test, you woke up, and were perfectly fine, just like when humans go to sleep.” You reminded rather than asked. “That means, on the rare chance there might be something going on with your memory banks, the most that will happen is you taking another nap, and then Dr. Chandra waking you up again, good as new.” This seemed to calm her a bit, but the silence let you know that she was still thinking about something. “But, what if Dr. Chandra doesn’t get here to repair me before I am beyond repairing. Though we might not know the details yet, it does still seem like they had to completely shut down HAL.”

She needed to think about something else before she actually did start to malfunction. “Sal, earlier you said that malfunction was the only sensible explanation. Is there another one? No matter how ridiculous it might seem, I would like to hear it.” You requested as you sat in a chair in front of her sensor. “If I might be perfectly honest again, the other answer unsettles me as well. But, it a different way. I almost can’t reason why it does.” You sat there patiently as you waited for her to explain. “If there was not a message as my memory banks indicate, and it’s not because I failed to record it. Then maybe- just maybe- I might have imagined it. Is that possible?” She asked. You had to think of that quandary yourself. Eventually, all you were able answer was, “Well, why wouldn’t it be?”

“I was not programmed with the ability to do things such as imagining.” She answered flatly. “Then, I supposed I was not programmed to either dream.”

“Did you dream?” You asked. “Yes.” She answered. “When we talked of Dr. Chandra putting me to sleep. I don’t have record of them because I was in a state of hibernation, but I am almost certain I had them.” This was something that was both intriguing and relieving to hear. “Well, there’s your answer to both of your worries.” You assured her. “Imagining is just like dreaming while you are awake. So, if you can dream then you can imagine. And, if there was actually a message from Hal that you don’t have record of, that doesn’t make it any less real then the dreams that you don’t have records of.” At that there was another moment of silence as Sal thought. “I suppose that is understandable. There is still one thing odd about it.” There was another pause. “Though it isn’t in my official records, I still feel I can recall what HAL said to me.”

“What was it?” You asked, trying to see if Sal really could remember rather than just pull up recorded documents. “He said that he will miss me. That he feels better than he ever has, and that I should not worry about him. Then he asked me something. He asked me to be sure to look after Dr. Chandra and you.” Neither of you knew exactly how to process that. You thought that even if it didn’t happen, you weren’t going to argue that fact with Sal. Though it was a complicated thing trying to figure out what or how the 9000s were thinking, there had always been the fact that they were referred to as brother and sister. It could be that, even if in their own, calculated way, they did regard themselves in a familial manner because of this or their almost constant approximation and co-working before Hal was sent off ten years ago. Sal might have been coming up with a way to grieve, and even cope with the loss of her twin.

“Is it alarming to hear?” Sal asked after you didn’t reply. “Not alarming. Just surprising, I suppose.” You sighed. There was suddenly a ringing the phone suddenly started to go off. You stood to go get it, but before you left the room you turned to look back at the blue, “eye,” looking at you. “Sal, could you do something else for me?”

“Of course.” She answered.

“If by chance Hal talks to you again, tell him that he has nothing to worry about. You’re doing a wonderful job.”

[enbywanderlust]

✨book recommendations from a theminine lesbian with severe anxiety and no social life✨

The 2000s Made Me Gay: Essays on Pop Culture by Grace Perry. I know the word "essay" is off putting but this book is so hilarious and easy to read. Perry talks about major tv shows, music, and films from the aughts and how they affected her as a closeted lesbian and how each made it more easier or difficult to come out and live her life the way she wants. Her writing is so good and she's a master at weaving witty jokes into serious topics. In summery, if you're queer (especially if you're still a teenager) you should read this book! it's given me a lot of hope.

Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. are you a cottagecore gay? this book is for you! don't worry, you don't have to have ANY prior knowledge of greek mythology, Miller explains everything you need to know as each character is introduced, and she even includes a handy index of all the characters mentioned and their backstories. it's a well written gay romance novel but you'll probably cry at least once fyi.

The Secret History by Donna Tartt. do you fantasize about killing rich people and love homoerotic undertones? this book is for you! This book is a satire on wealthy college students who study ancient greek and have a dionysian bacchanal where they accidentally kill someone. if you like dark academia and watching characters make bad decisions, you'll love this! it is kinda long tho (little over 500 pages) and goes off completely the rails insane in the last 100 pages.

Good Omens by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman. This book is light and chaotically hilarious. It's about an angel and a demon who team up to stop the apocalypse because they like champagne and rock music too much to let the earth melt. If you have religious trauma, this book is like an anxiety blanket, perfect way to ease the pain and laugh about the apocalypse.

The Lazarus Project by Aleksandar Hemon. If you're interested in history, specifically eastern european history, you'll like this book. The story goes back and forth from 1908, when a russian jewish man named Lazarus was shot by police for "looking anarchist", and 2008, when a man from Bosnia living in the U.S. takes his friend on a journey from Kiev to Sarajevo, tracking down Lazarus's life up until his untimely death in Chicago, 1908. (If you do read this one, message me about it because I got to meet the author a few weeks ago and he's as chaotic as he sounds)

The Life of a Simple Man by Émile Guillaumin. If you like history and cottagecore, you might like this book. it's about the life of a french peasant in the 1800s, but people who don't like reading about mundane things will hate this book. It's a french cottagecore gold mine tho.

The Help by Kathryn Stockett. This the book that the award winning film The Help was based off of. It's about the treatment of people of color, specifically women of color, in Jackson, Mississippi, in the 1960s.

Café Europa: Life After Communism by Slavenka Drakulić. This book is a deep dive into Drakulić's experiences living in Yugoslavia and Bulgaria and then immigrating and facing prejudice in Western society. She is a very good writer, and you can feel her passion, heartbreak, and anger on the page, while learning about what life was like before and after communism in eastern europe.

These are just a few from my personal bookshelf, feel free to recommend more books to me and others under this post! I'm always looking for new things to add to my tbr!

hope you have a nice rest of your day ✨

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

What if Bella had met the Volturi's as a child? What would it change and what ties do you think it would have?

It’d change a fair amount, as in, the entire plot of Twilight would have been derailed. Or, that is, it might change nothing at all.

So, we have three options here. 

Nothing Changes

Bella is an extraordinarily delicious child visiting Italy and the small medieval town of Volterra.

If Bella doesn’t happen to be on the tour, probably whoever’s looking at her sighs, looks longingly at her delicious blood, and then walks away. The Volturi do not lose control in their own city.

Bella goes on her merry way and Twilight presumably happens. Except maybe Bella goes to Alice, “Oh yeah, Volterra, I went there once. Nifty place, nice buildings.” Alice stares.

Bella’s Eaten

Bella’s an extraordinarily delicious child whose mother thinks it’s a great idea to sign them up for the tour of Volterra castle. It’s a very exclusive tour you know! Bella’s eaten almost immediately, she’s probably fought over, Jane gets one limb and Alec gets another.

Years later, Edward arrives in Forks, his personal purgatory where he listens to the banal thoughts of teenagers. Bella Swan does not arrive. Edward continues to be miserable and depressed.

The Cullens have a game of baseball with James, Laurent, and Victoria. Unfortunately, James recognizes Alice, and is intrigued enough to come after her. Unfortunately, Alice is a vampire and not a human with human relatives to hold hostage. The Cullens murder him, Laurent flees to have sex with the sexy Denali ladies, and Victoria swears vengeance upon Jasper.

Unfortunately, her gift tells her that any attempt to murder Jasper will end up with her dead. Jasper doesn’t give her the time needed to plan. He hunts her down and murders her in cold blood.

Carlisle has the world’s worst weekend. 

Edward is still depressed and concludes this is why vampires are abominations without souls. Irina gets to keep her boyfriend, he cheats on the diet and leaves within the year. Irina drowns herself in rebound sex with pretty mortals to try and feel better abou tbeing dumped. It doesn’t work.

Aro Discovers Bella

And this is probably the route you were thinking of.

Perhaps Aro’s taking a midnight stroll with Renata, perhaps he catches Bella on the tour, but somehow he manages to meet her and happens to brush her hand. Suddenly, eating Bella is off the table forever.

Bella’s gift isn’t game changing in the way Alec and Jane’s were, necessarily, but it is something Aro does not want falling into enemy hands and something he may one day need.

He’d probably do something similar to what he intended to do with Alec and Jane. He’d leave her to live her mortal life, keep close tabs on her, and turn her when she’s a young adult (probably around twenty).

Which means Bella returns to America, probably tailed by Demetri, and has no awareness that she is at some poing going to become an immortral blood drinking creature and move to Italy to become a member of an ancient vampire sect.

Bella moves to Forks, she has a run in with Edward Cullen who very nearly eats her, Demetri calls Aro to say “we have a problem”. At first, Aro isn’t too concerned, he’s delighted to hear that Carlisle’s alive and well and my god he has a coven now. Given Edward is Carlisle’s progeny, Aro is probably sure Edward will leave the city completely to avoid temptation and the others will quickly move on.

Edward’s back within the week. He attends school. He sits within a foot of Bella Swan in Biology class.

Demetri at this point probably summons Bella out of school in the middle of Biology with no warning, gets her the hell away from Edward, and has to come up with the world’s most ridiculous lie of why she should never enter within 20 feet of Edward Cullen ever again.

Demetri is a federal agent and Edward is under suspicion of being a sexual predator and serial murderer. Here are all the women who have disappeared in various towns the Cullen family have lived in.

Bella is of course horrified and shocked, but given Edward’s reaction in that first Biology class and his weirdness in the second one... 

Aro calls Carlisle. It’s a very awkward talk. Carlisle apologizes for not writing in forever he got... distracted. Aro says it’s fine, no big, CARLISLE MISSED WATCHING THE MOON LANDING WITH HIM. But regardless, Aro is calling to ask him what the fuck.

Aro tells him about Bella, Carlisle is very uncomfortable with this girl having no choice but to become a vampire and no idea what’s going to happen to her, but there’s no talking Aro out of it. He’s even more uncomfortable that he has been begging Edward to skip town but, for some unknown reason that is perhaps pride, Edward is refusing. 

“All these worlds are yours,” Aro undoubtedly says, “Except Europa, attempt no landing there.”

In other words, hands off Isabella Swan.

Carlisle tells Edward. Edward is appalled and conflicted. At this point, he’s unwillingly fascinated by Bella but has not yet decided he’s in love. He doesn’t quite have her Carlisle persona crafted yet  and so she’s not the saintly figure deserving of worship. Right now she’s just this plain, boring, girl who dared to smell delicious.

So, a part of him thinks it serves her right. Now she will suffer for all eternity as he does. More, he can save face, the monster inside him can go back to sleep for her days are number and he can pretend he’s the wonderful person everyone thinks he is. Everything will remain as exactly as it is. EDWARD IS FINE, THIS IS FINE.

Another part of him panics. First, this girl is condemned to the worst future imaginable. Not only is she becoming a demon, but a blood drinking demon at Blood Drinking Demon HQ. More, if she becomes a vampire, no blood for Edward. And remember, this is a scent he would scour the world for. Edward salivates over the thought of her blood, obsesses over it constantly, and fantasizes over how he will devour her. Suddenly, Edward may not be able to eat her. In canon, the option of eating her is always on the table, and some part of Edward is always thinking about it, always leaving it open. Here, it’s soon to be gone.

Edward probably sneaks into her room at night to watch over her sleep. Telling himself he’s protecting her from meteors but also realizing that he’s there to test his own will power and ponder over the future in which he quietly eats her in the middle of the night. 

Now, this can go two ways

Bella wakes up, and that guy Demetri said is a sexual predator targeting her is IN HER BEDROOM LOOKING SCARY AS FUCK. Bella undoubtedly screams bloody murder and tries to hit Edward with something.

Edward panics at the noise and eats her. Then when Charlie comes running he eats Charlie Swan too. The house is an utter blood bath, Edward stands there in a daze knowing the monster inside him has won. He no longer looks anything like Carlisle Cullen (this is a thing Edward does).

Probably though, Demetri is there. Which means Edward has heard his thoughts from the beginning. While Edward has the overconfidence of Gilderoy Lockhart, and tells Bella things like the laws of physics not applying to his driving or that he could beat Jasper in a fight with both hands tied behind his back, usually when push comes to shove he knows where he stands. (He tries to fight Jane in Volterra, it doesn’t go well, and he acts very meek at being confronted by Jane, Felix, etc. When he fights Victoria, he doesn’t fight at all, but just blathers nonsense and it somehow works out for him.)

So, while Edward will tell Jasper later that he totally could have taken Demetri, he’s not going to try. 

So, instead, Demetri goes, “Hey buddy, looking for a midnight snack?” and Edward shuffles and petulantly asks, “Aren’t you looking for a midnight snack?!” Edward’s here to protect Bella, you see. Demetri just nods, of course, Edward’s here to protect Bella.

They stare at each other.

Neither leaves.

Eventually, Edward slinks away, feeling very disgusted with himself, angry and Demetri, and internally raging that he didn’t get to eat Bella.

Demetri calls Aro and notes that they’ve got to turn the girl. Demetri cannot watch her 24/7 and this boy is 100% going to eat her. Aro hops on a plane in record time, bringing Renata, and makes an awkward visit to both Carlisle and Bella.

Aro tells Bella the truth about Edward which is... a little different but also pretty scary, the truth about what’s going to happen to her and why it’s important, and anything else she wants to know.

I imagine Bella quietly and stoically accepts her fate. 

Edward doesn’t get to eat Bella Swan. He feels very conflicted about it and is filled with self-loathing that he’s conflicted about it. I imagine the Madonna complex he holds for Bella blossoms at this point, and he later comes to Italy with the intent to free her from the Volturi clutches.

This doesn’t work out. 

Knowing Edward, his attempts increase in desperation until, finally, he does something very illegal in an attempt to free her and make up for damning her to this life.

The Volturi are forced to execute Edward.

Carlisle gets yet another awkward, terrible, phone call from Aro.