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marsbutterfly · 2 years ago

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let's play a game of: is mars actually going to write today or is she going to keep opening and closing twitter while procrastinating?

#i havent opened a google doc in so long #like the last time i was actually able to write something that i was happy with was when i went to through a grippy sock vacay last year #i havent even attempted writing since #i have this annie idea that i really want to write and that i have all the necessary ingredients for #but the words just wont come out #i'm sorry to let all of you down #i promise i am trying #mars' bullshit #BITCH ALSO LMAO #I MADE AN ASMR CHANNEL ON TIKTOK #I NEED TO ACTUALLY FILM STUFF FOR THAT

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s0fter-sin · 8 months ago

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something happening on a mission, something personal that has soap spiralling; panic and rage making him reckless, thoughtless, and ghost has to draw the line

“you’re compromised johnny; you know what that means?”

“you’re not pulling me out,” soap immediately snarls. he turns on him and ghost barely recognises him; venomous fear turning his eyes to unyielding ice. "you're not sidelining me; i need to be in this-!"

but ghost has never been afraid of venom; spat or dripped straight from bared fangs.

he snakes out a hand grip the back of his neck, jerking him in a rough shake. "if you can't think, you can't be a soldier," he growls and he flinches like he's been struck.

his lips quiver as they twist in a sneer and he wrenches, trying to free himself of his hold.

ghost doesn't let him.

"it means you give your body to me because your head ain't fucking attached to it anymore."

soap stills, body trembling beneath his hand as he sucks in shaking breaths.

he tightens his grip, pulling him closer and digs his forehead hard into his. “it means you give yourself to me so i can have the weapon that you are and use you the way you're meant to be used."

the ice in soap's eyes fractures.

ghost’s voice drops to a whisper, spoken only to johnny, not this facade of vengeance and pain, and wills it to reach him through the glaciers.

“so i can keep you safe ‘til it’s done and i can bring you back.”

#in my head its bc graves abducts his sister and is using her as hostage to draw him out knowing ghost will always follow him #but the intensity and intimacy of saying ‘you cant trust your mind not to betray you so let me be in charge of your body until you can’#after what happened to tommy he could never deny johnny his right to save his sister #but its bc of what happened to tommy that he knows he cant let him do it alone with only his rage to guide him #hes more likely to get himself killed and ghost wont live through that #so he has to balance it #and the only way he knows how is to completely shut down soap’s mind until hes no more than instinct and muscle memory #if he cant think practically then dont let him think at all #reduce him to a place where he can only follow orders #and when its finally over and his sister is safe and graves is dead #only then will he drag johnny back up to the surface #he’ll do it even if it means dragging him kicking and screaming back to humanity #instead of letting him sink in the depths where nothing hurts. theres no fear down there. no pain. only order #and thats the risk ghost took sending johnny to that place but he only did it bc he would stop at nothing to bring him back #and help him through the after #the breakdown. the rush of panic and rage and relief and anguish johnnys been supressing on his order #it was his word that turned johnny into a ghost #and its his touch that brings him back to the man #coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt #we’re a team. ghost team #cod #soapghost #ghostsoap #ghost x soap #ghoap #simon ghost riley #ghost cod #john soap mactavish #soap cod #save post

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bacchuschucklefuck · 3 months ago

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Riz has counted four casseroles this week alone. Five, if one goes by the method of cooking, but Yelen's scary when she's crossed, and calling her burek by its proper name is important to her, so Riz does her the courtesy and doesn't include it in his mental tally.

He holds the tupperware over his head to keep it out if the way as he takes careful steps over the piles of notes in his path. The dockman case just closed, relevant documentations handed over to relevant personnels, evidences dealt with as needed; all he has lying around now is just record of the process and traces of himself thinking through it. Unsurprisingly they still haven't invented a surface more convenient for people under five feet who like to pace to put pieces of paper on than the ground.

Actual records go into the case folder with the other documents. Anything else with at least one side still blank is going to the school kids in the block - they chew through an astounding amount of paper just learning arithmetic. The rest is for the recycling basket.

Later. It's his mandated lunch break right now.

Riz sits down in front of the corner file cabinet. In an office often overrun with papers and strings and sometimes even thumbtacks, he's never really managed to clutter up this exact square of surface like every other ones. Ever since the bottom drawer rattled for no discernible reason a day long past, his eyes have always just kinda decided to slide across the space without acknowledging it.

It's years out, now. Riz doesn't know why he thought it such a big deal anymore, back then. He wasn't scared, he doesn't think. Not anymore. Maybe just uncomfortable with the idea that certain things persist despite all efforts to change.

He opens the tupperware. Dame Carabelle's experiment greets him with enough spice in the aroma alone to knock out a small mammal. When he chopped the vegetables for this casserole he couldn't really imagine the eventual heft of it, evident even through just these few ladles' worth, maybe weighing heavier for being still warm. His folk eat more through the smell and the textures and the aftertastes than the taste itself. His folk's meal is really the cooking rather than the eating. The eating is the meal's end.

"Hey," he tells the file cabinet's bottom drawer. "Um."

It's the anniversary. Riz doesn't know the exact date of his dad's death; nobody currently alive does. He and Mom both use the date of the funeral, though as he moved out to Bastion and then got more directly involved with Interplanar he hasn't really been going to Dad's grave as much. Doesn't seem like very efficient use of his time, catching a train or borrowing a car or spending a whole spell slot on going somewhere he knows Dad isn't at. They're sorta coworkers now. They talk on and off every other week between missions. When he goes now, it's just to clean up the place, keeping the landmark tidy and respectable.

Without that work to mark the date he doesn't really know what it serves anymore. But he still remembers it. Still takes note, absently or not, when it comes around.

There's not really a good way to tell the drawer that. Riz looks for another way to start the... conversation, hopefully. The question at play, he'd guess, is why he's doing this. He's been pretty content ignoring all the rattlings and the knocks from inside and the times it sits slightly ajar without him ever opening it himself; hell, he still uses the three drawers on top of it. Space is fucking precious in Bastion.

Precious enough to finally fix this damn drawer so he gets his turn to use it? Riz asks himself. Is that what we're getting to? Then he dismisses the thought - he didn't manage to fix it the times he actually tried, let alone-- now. When he doesn't really care that much to.

That's probably a good place to start. "'s fine if you keep being in there, turns out," Riz says.

The lunch hours are quiet in the block, sleepy and bright with the brief window of sunlight that manages to break through roof overhangs and extended balconies and laundry lines and climbing vines. Riz's work isn't loud here (the loud parts happen away from his office, if everything goes right), but the fragment of early summer heat reflected in the steady warmth his meal still carries compels him to lower his voice even more. It makes the words feel intimate, in a way he's never been familiar with - if he says something he just says it. He doesn't whisper. If he gives his friends something, he gives it open-palm. He's found out, along the way, that people usually don't think of rituals and courtesies the way he does.

Small voice for a diminished monster. "You know why I think so?" Riz asks. "Because almost two decades ago you kidnapped me and almost killed me, and now you rattle a drawer in my office."

It doesn't sound as much like a taunt as Riz wanted it to; the drawer has made a lot of noises again this morning when he checked the calendar, and he was definitely annoyed at it. Now, though, facing it like this after cooking the whole morning with more grandparents and peers from the block than he can count on both hands to cater for a tenant union meeting, he thinks the annoyance has morphed. Changed shape.

It has the shades of something like pity. Riz is not prone to pity, and especially not at these kinda matters. It's slightly maddening that he coheres perfectly outside of this one spot. That he commands his spaces, except for a drawer.

He puts the tupperware onto the floor between himself and the cabinet. "I know we're aware it's the anniversary," he says at the drawer. "You do this every year. You make a ruckus every time I decide to go do my job instead of mooching off my friends' aircon, and every time I get an invitation to some stupid social thing I want to turn down, and every time one of the old people tries to introduce me to a child or a nibling, because being a bachelor over thirty is weird," he pinches the bridge of his nose. "I have three fucking jobs. I love doing my fucking jobs. I'm forcing funds into infrastructures. You're never leaving, are you."

The drawer vibrates lightly. It's a very, very mild acknowledgement, considering the history of reactions Riz has gotten from this thing. Riz thinks it's emanating joyous agreement, or satisfaction.

It only sharpens the pity. Riz doesn't like that, but it's how it is. That's, ultimately, the lesson he's been taught over and over and over again, just by existing as himself, turned every which way by space after space that don't see him eye-to-eye: it's not like he'd quit living over any of it. It's not like any of it can sand off these fundamental pieces of him.

He's outgrown a lot of things, he's found out. Again, and again, and again. A childhood home, a yearly trip, a monster.

"'s probably scary for you, huh?" He asks. "Because I left."

He thinks he hears joints creak that sound like you did. Probably the way a scorned lover would say it, in a movie or a yellowback. He has no more connection to the idea than he did as a kid. Less, because it doesn't even scare him.

"That's what it is, right? That it's the anniversary, and I'll never be like Dad." He raises a knee from the floor, pulls it back closer to him. Slings an arm over it. "You love to remind me. The thing is, Dad also left. He loved Mom and he loved me, and none of us wanted it to happen, but it still did. Because love does fuckall to make anyone stay on its own."

He's long past being bitter about it. It's just the facts. Once upon a time he looked into the future and the specter of his friends' happily-ever-after casted lightless, fathomless shadow over him. Love, marriage, that kind of devotion, to a fifteen-year-old with more solved cases than friends seemed so eternal. Final.

But you can only watch your friends build up apps' worth of jilted lovers for so long before getting over it.

"You know what I learned?" Riz tells the drawer. "Love doesn't make anyone stay. Project management does."

He stands up, and picks up the tupperware of Dame Carabelle's casserole, that he helped make, that he helped share with a block's worth of neighbors and members of a community he's at home with, and goes sit at his desk to eat. "Last chance to get any," he drops an offer over his shoulder as he walks away.

He doesn't eat all of his share in one go. What he's spared he leaves on the desk when going outside for a smoke break. Baron looks the exact same as when he saw them last, when he catches a glimpse; they haven't grown at all. They aren't there when he comes back inside, but the leftover has gone days-old cold, like someone's sucked the future out of it.

#dimension 20 #fantasy high #riz gukgak #baron from the baronies #this is set a Long time into the future. riz is like 32 in this one #''I will go to sleep'' so turns out that was a fucking lie #lmao I just needed to finally externalize this idea into Some kind of more final form #initially I aimed for a comic with this but ooughgoughhh I am. indisposed. unable to do that rn #and also I feel like there would just be too fucking much Riz Saying Words in that format for it to work. and I always go if theres so much #words in ur comic might as well make it a fic. and well. heeding my own advice perhaps #just been sitting on this sentiment of like. perceiving romantic relationships as uniquely permanent or conclusive #when the vast majority of people I know would hugely benefit from a divorce lmao #since watching fhjy at least. I think in a sense this is kind of my personal answer for that sticky note style comic I did way back thens #how much of that fear of being deprioritized comes from not being taken care of by the community you're in #I think that's the prettiest answer I can give for riz's deal. not one singular Special Person no matter the kind of flavour #but spaces that he's integrated in. that he has a hand in building even #okay NOW I sleep. everyone be quiet ok small voice for good sleep. it wont be a lie this time I prommy

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puppyeared · 5 months ago

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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you

#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what #allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of #the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than #to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do #im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt #take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was #mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their #mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that #explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain #direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in #arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to #engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out #theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive #a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked #picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing #sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example #for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war #is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old #wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for #steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with #especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can #look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never #treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time #but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made #feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them #accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me #yapping #diary

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screamingwiththewolves · 20 days ago

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HYDE IS GONNA USE THE TEMPORARY DEATH POTION SO HE CAN TALK TO JEKYLL IN THE MINDSPACE!

#MARK MY WORDS THAT'S IT #I knew the potion was going to have to come up later.#and people kept saying jekyll or hyde were gonna fake their death to fool the cops #but i was like “that wont work. their not just gonna leave his corpse on the floor.”#“the cops are gonna find out he's still alive when try to take his body to the morgue.”#and like...the cops are gonna ask if he's suddenly alive later #BUT TEMPORARY DEATH WOULD ALLOW HIM TO TALK WITH JEKYLL #OK #I KNOW WHERE WE'RE GOING NOW #also...i need you to know how INTENCE this revelation was to me. i was like getting hit by an elephant XD #the glass scientists #glass scientists

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luck-of-the-drawings · 1 year ago

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The Oath an older sister takes is on par with that of a Paladins, and sometimes upheld with the very same ferocity…

#jrwi fanart #jrwi riptide #jrwi show #gillion tidestrider #edyn tidestrider #OKAY I WONT RAMBLE HERE AS MUCH AS LAST TIME BUT RAAHHH IM RLY PROUD O THIS PAGE. it was rottin in my wips for so long #but now its DONE!!(as much as im willing it to be) i rly like my colors! i looove playin with colors :3c #seeing everyones nice words on my last post also made me SOOO HAPPY it motivated me to create MORE!!!!#SO HERE HERE more edyn n gillion bc they make me EMOTIONAL!! i work with lil kids as my job too and im also an older sister so #i might be projecting a liiittle bit. okay to be fair i project onto gillion ALOT!! i didnt do well in school and adults are mean somtimes:#i hope we find out whats going on with edyn soon... whole heartedly trust her tho. she has gillions best interests in mind!#ive been rotatin the thought of her assassinating the elders in my brain for SO LONG!! i just need edyn to KILL to protect gillion ouuhhh #hope she comes back with like a giant sword or a cool gun #RAMBLE ABT UR FEELINGS IN THE TAGS BTW #I READ IT ALL N IT MAKES ME SO SO SO HAPPY. YOU GOTTA.

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conanssummerchild · 6 months ago

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ok so like i know that technically in canon rick's full name is richard, but in my heart it's ricardo and there's nothing anyone can do abt it

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triglycercule · 3 months ago

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What do you think the types of drunk would the murder trio be? Im pretty sure ask dusttale already answered this question about dust but i have to ask the mtt expert

see now askdusttale DID answer the question. but they didn't ANSWER the question when asked what dust is like drunk. they just said that dust is the type to drink himself blackout drunk. so that mean i have total freedom on deciding what the mtt are like drunk hehehe (rubs hands together in a villanous way that you would imagine nightmare doing or something idk)

i already have an absolutely hilarious idea for horror and it might just because i'm on the guilt section of his character analysis but i could TOTALLY imagine him being an emotional drunk. like he CRIES. horror sans man known for being incredibly guarded and private with what he feels bawling his eye out. he gets mad he gets sad he does not get happy because horror doesn't have the right to be happy. he is too upset over the fact that he fucking DOOMED all of horrortale because of his selfishness and nothing can stop him from being incredibly vocal about that fact so much so that killer had to tape his mouth shut because he wouldn't stop crying so loud. and then he just silently cries until he passes out from exhaustion. the alcohol has an incredibly strong effect on him because i dont think he would drink regularly plus he definitely hasnt drinken anything in those 7 years of starvation. it hits like a fucking plane crashing into him. or like getting his eye taken out again. either one!

another funny idea i had for killer would be like the alcohol affecting him but he SWEARS that he's still sober. he is very confused when he starts stumbling because wtf he doesnt FEEL drunk??? why is he bumping into walls and tables HELP WHY DOES HE SOUND FUCKING STUPID???? the alcohol is definitely effecting him but he swears he swears he doesn't feel drunk. hes not drunk its just the damn body doing this stupid bullshit!!!! he's still very aware of what's going on and is basically the same as sober but just like. he's wiggly he's wobbly and oh shit he just fell head face first into a tv whoops. he'd also have a high tolerance because just because. he can drink without feeling like shit until he just blacks out mid conversation with someone because his body couldn't take the toll of all the beer or whatever. hilarious idea triglycercule thank you triglycercule i know

dust in the context that we already know that he drinks AND he can fight against the human while like partially drunk.... i feel it would be kinda like a giggly drunk situation. except dust doesn't laugh at anything that's funny he only laughs when someone gets hurt or something. SADISTIC giggly drunk. because i can already imagine a half drunk dust laughing his ass off after killing the human and its a beautiful sight to me.

anyways imagine how it goes when you pair this sadistic giggly drunk with another that wont stop going through the 5 stages of grief and another that keeps on fucking falling over for no reason in his eyes. dream blunt rotation but the blunt is a bottle of vodka. i can already imagine it in my head and its fucking HILARIOUS. horror going on about how he caused the deaths of others and manipulated and tricked papyrus while killer is just trying his best to keep his eyes open because for some reason they won't stop trying to close. he is surprisingly getting frustated. dust has long since lost his voice laughing at this and he's just silent wheezing at everything. also phantom papyrus is only making the laughter worse because he keeps on making rude comments towards horror and killer and only he can hear him and its guffaw inducing. mtt amazing friend group you dont get shit like this anywhere else

#killer's breakdancing and he swears this isnt on purpose guys #GUYS GUYS ITS NOT ME THE BODY IS DRUNK OKAY WHY CANT I STOP WHEN DID I LEARN HOW TO DO THIS #horror has SO much to be guilty over its not even funny. ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY #nobody talks about this but this man is GUILTSTRIFEN. he is literally filled with so much guilt its not even funny #dust and killer have the genocides they did. ok. sure. that's it????#ugh god i dont wanna ramble in tags again..... im just gonna end up saying it in the analysis anyways but ughhhhhhhhhhh #yk what fine i'll rapid fire. trying to keep people from killing themselves. watching his friends die.#knowing that other monsters are getting eaten. worrying papyrus. coming up with a plan he knows wont work and tries make it happen #because that idea of them deconstrucing the core would NOT have worked so he did that out of selfishness #forcing his community to eat humans. tricking papyrus into eating humans. going against all his morals #dare i need say more i swear AND ALL OF THESE ARE SEPERATE THINGS TOO!!!!!!#he single handedly DOOMED horrortale into disarray by destroying the core #the eye idea wouldve worked. it wouldve been the only way monsterkind thrived #and yet he destroyed the core but kept his eye safe. as if one last big fuck you #you can have my eye but you cant have the machine that needs it. good luck bitches #THERE ALREADY WAS FOOD IN SNOWDIN BEFORE HE TOLD THEM TO EAT HUMANS #THERE COULD'VE BEEN ANOTHER WAY TO RATION THE FOOD OR FIND S FOOD SOURCE #BUT HE JUST TOLD TJEM TO EST HUMANS OUT OF SPITE SO UNDYNE WOULDN'T GET THE SOULS #granted it was a solution that worked for the hunger problem BUT HORROR FUCKING HATES IT #HE HATES THE IDEA OF EATING HUMANS HE HATES THE IDEA OF KILLING KIDS #BUT HE STILL DOES IT HE GOES AGAINST ALL HIS MORALS UGHHHHH #horror sans. horror sans my king horror sans my glorious lord and savior #i cannot WAIT to drop that character analysis. it will change lives. and by lives i mean me #i will be a changed man once the horror analysis comes out #anyways WHO IS THIS ANON AGAIN. its a question i always wonder because wtf #you have a daily question for me. this is like a log in event. if i answer all the questions in a row for a week i get a SPECIAL question #but fr thank you so much for your questions i love answering them its so fun to wrack my mind and figure out a way to answer it. brain teas #every time i see the words mtt expert i laugh lowly like an evil villain but i try not let it get to my head #humility is a standard i aim to uphold. one of my character traits. triglycercule character analysis when #tricule asks

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bitchkay · 23 days ago

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14. A blurb about how a character would celebrate my birthday😼

I'm in a very natsuo mood guys🤕

bitchkay's 21st birthday event

CW: fluffy fluffy, hes my boyfriend everyone!!, spending endeavors money--

Word count:

"Wake up... c'mon..."

You groan as your body is being shook awake. Opening your eyes a crack, you squint at the light peeking through the curtains.

"Good morning sweetheart... happy birthday."

Allowing your eyes to adjust to the morning light you find Natsuo sitting on the edge of your bed with a bouquet of colourful wildflowers.

"... good morning" you say through a sleepover stricken voice, sitting up in the bed.

"Good morning, are you awake now?"

"Well you just woke me up so I'd think so." You say watching his eyes crinkled on the sides smiling at you as he hands you the bouquet, the sound of the wrapping paper the loudest think in the room.

"Happy birthday." Natsuo hugs you to his chest kissing you on the forehead.

"Thank you baby," you smile against his neck as his cool fingertips touch your warm skin.

You stay like that for a moment longer before Natsuo speaks up.

"How are you feeling today? I'm in the mood to spoil you."

"Its a Monday so I didn't really plan to do much other than chill. We're having dinner with my family tonight so I'm not opposed to spending time with you during the day," you stan up pulling some pants on in the meantime.

"Good, cus we're going out, whatever you want, on me."

"That's your dads black card."

"I know."

©bitchkay.tumblr.com

Dosen't matter how far behind I am on mha NATSUO TODOROKI YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS‼‼

#kay's 21st birthday party #natsuo todoroki #todoroki natsuo #todoroki #natsuo #mha natsuo #natsuo todoroki x reader #todoroki natsuo x reader #bnha natsuo #natsuo x reader #if you look at the word “todoroki” for too long it stops looking real #im like damn this mf has 3 Os in it #mha x reader #bnha x reader #do i even have to add all these tags im probably never gonna write for mha ever again #at least until im fully caught up #and i probably wont get caught up until season 8 comes out tbh #like im already 3 seasons behind like already missed so many arcs #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #my hero academia x reader #boku no hero academia x reader #i literally left of on like end of season 4 and i was watching season 4 cus season 5 came out and then i was in college and never finished #anyway--#kay's writing #there needs to be more natsuo reader content #just for me tho #as a treat #as a birthday present actually

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nomairuins · 2 months ago

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i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is

#ive been overthinking 1 light and casual mildly funny response to something but im worried itll come off as disrespectful and dismissive And #make me seem stupid and uncaring all at the same time. and also be seen as insulting. but like idt itd be insulting right like. im not #saying what it is so ig for all you guys know im like I mean if i say All your shit suck ball and i hateit kys. <- thats not the thing i was #going to say #like it doesnt matter now the window for response is closed now but i feel stupid bc i shouldve just said it it was light and casual. im so #bad at keeping convos gojng im convinced im not going to survive. In like a light and casual way like in a He will not make it through the #winter joke way. dw. im not going to do anything bc i had One failed interaction. if i was going to do anythjng itd be bc of the 8000000 #other failed interactions. But im not. anyways. it just makes me feel so useless 😭 like i want to respond i want to talk to ppl so bad but #i feel like i mess things up Irreparably every time i speak OR i take too LONG overthinking my response and then i just cant respond bc its #been too long and then its been 3 years and the only messages ive ever sent r my intro message and 1 message 2 years ago that nobody #responded to at all. or the conversation stopped immediately after. and like i used to be better at this i was lkke. talkative in a couple #muts servers like. i talked 2 ppl daily in those servers and i had fun and like. I was an important part of the group and i felt like it #but i just feel like such an outsider for Everything and its literally my fault bc i cant just like. Talk. The explosion. bc im always like #im gonna try im gonna do it this time im gonna get it back im going to finally be Good connor and im going to fix it all and make a Good #solid friend group and ill find HEALTHY LOVE and i wont selfsabotage and ill move out and have a job and ill balance it well and ill start #all my hobbies and ill have a great routine and be so loveable and on top of it and not stressed and content and happy and roll with the #punches and then theres a single hiccup and im like Well fuckinf whatever im going to be an unemployed hermit forever and im going to die b4 #im 25 anyways so Who cares and also im digging a little hole for myself. and its like. AUGHH ik i just have to persevere and overcome but #even saying that feels so stupid its not fucking hard its Talking to ppl. like. i literally if ive ever said a word to you i had to think #avt it and strategize how to respond right even for like. like. it makes it sound like its not genuine it is #like for example i want to say hey i love your art! but then i freak out and im like thats not normal thats like a rly generic comment they #hear that all the time theyll thjnk im being polite and my brains like hrmmm rewrite Your art changed my life. It shaped me. Ill never be #the same. Nad im like ok too far overcorrected go back and the sentence generator is like Your art has colors 💯 like. GOD. WHY IS IT SO #difficult. and then usually i either just dont say anythinf and feel awful abt it 4ever OR i send it on anon and then i spend like 15 #minutes ibsessively slightly tweaking the apelling and capitalization and punctuation to make sure it doesnt seem like its me just in case #it Is the worst possible thing to say but then i see the response and itll be like AWWW TYSM :] THIS MEANS A LOT or whathaveyou and i feel #stupid bc i couldve just Told them this to their face and it wouldve been a good positive interaction we had. but instead i had 2 hide and #tyoe entirely differently so they couldnt sniff me from my typing style. and it soesnt even feel like the thanks is actually 4 me bc i #tweaked the message sm. and it still makes me happy that the oersons hapoy but its like. that couldve been a nice mutual interaction #like not that i need a personal ty i compliment ppl when i Want to compliment ppl and when its genuine yk. i dont do it so i get mutualpoint

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strawbbfluff · 6 months ago

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i someone to pin me down NOW

#jade rambles #my brain has been on autopilot all day #and i was trying to speak but words just weren’t coming out so i gave up #its weird cause that’s never happened to me before?#i think im just burnt out #tickle the thoughts away wont you?

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godsfavoritescientist · 3 months ago

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Billford isnt canon in a literal Sincere Authorial Intent sense, y'all 😭😭😭 please get better standards for how much creators need to include in order for something to be considered officially canon. I've jokingly said "I cant believe billford is canon" too, but I thought we were saying that lightheartedly. I thought we all recognized that it was "canonized" in a wink-wink nudge-nudge way where they fully leave room for people to interpret it as "haha isn't it so funny and clever that they're framing being betrayed by a demon as if it's a romantic breakup!" Please. I'm begging you, do you understand what I'm saying here

#godsrambles #this is the same guy who wrote blubs and durland with a ton of gay subtext and then was SURPRISED when people pointed it out #complaining #<- so the tag can be blocked just in case. although I dont think I'll be using it regularly. probably wont ever use it again fingers crosse #i would judge the contents of this book very differently if I thought that this was a sincere attempt at representing a queer relationship #and I think that hirsch would very likely feel very stressed about portraying it respectfully and carefully if it'd been his sincere intent #i dont think he would attempt writing a canonically abusive queer relationship at all tbh. not without a whole bunch of sensitivity readers #this is the same guy who never gave wendy her own episode because he was worried about messing up her character #his strategy for not writing women poorly is to have hardly any main character women in the show at all #in the behind the scenes commentary he mentions that he asked someone if it would be problematic for him to canonize blubs and durland #and the only thing he really did after hearing that it would be ok is adding the two words 'and love' to their lines in the last episode #yes the book contains shipping fuel but getting upset about people who dont want to engage with shipping or who actively dislike the ship?#come on man. the tags are already flooded with the ship can you not see why people would be annoyed if it isnt their thing #let people live

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yanderespamton78 · 6 months ago

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the current state of the arg

sorry guys the art isnt arting D:

(btw if youre confused on why i drew turnip like that i was referencing the picrew he did ages ago bc idk it looked fun to draw anddd i dont like taking reference off real life images)

#i felt like just a lillll bit of a creep relistening to voice messages over and over to find a good quote but. yk what. it was worth it #i totally didnt take reference from the really cool face i used in that animation because im still really proud of it #idk if emi or TD have a sona but if they do im not aware of it and i didnt feel like asking so i just drew both of them as blank characters #im too stressed to scheme lol #maybe #just maybe #i need to stop drinking tea because the caffiene makes me anxious #...#naaaaahhhh #i dont really know what to do with myself atm because i dont want to work on the animation unless turnon is ok out of pure spite #this morning i was absolutely radiating stress #i have a friend who shows up so we can walk together to school and she could tell smth was off lol #i literally could not hide it at all even if i wanted too #i kept pulling my hat over my face thats the main way you can tell that im stressed #not that it really matters that you know that bc none of you are ever gonna witness that but. fun fact abt me ig #ugh #if turnon dies i am gonna cry so hard <333 #and i wont finish the animation <333333333 #(at this point just trying anything to get turnon back)#im gonna make a word doc #i make word docs when im stressed /hj #quick question turnip : is there a way to get turnon out of the situation he is in or is he just gonna die and theres nothing we can do #about it /gen #because i have a sneaky suspicion that we cant actually do anything about this #i swear to god #LETS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE!!#A DEFRAG MIGHT COME OUT TMR!!#its been 21 days and a defrag takes on average 20-25 days #ough #turnip and addon im gonna find where you live and i will burn your respective houses down

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savage-rhi · 3 months ago

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Fuchgenta??

#the tiny house i based my own blue print off of is for sale at 110000 across the country #if my ass weren't broke id hop on that and drive all the way over to get it #but also 110k for a tiny house on wheels is pretty outrageous especially when these things were originally marked at a cap of 65k #once upon a year now no one can afford them #i do want a home someday and I'm also finding I'm nomadic by nature #dream would be have a “home base” with land thats permanent #but as soon as winter comes i can pack up and move south or wherever is warmer for several months before returning #that would be great for minimizing fibro flares getting away from the cold #heck if remote work ends up getting me good money after i pay off a huge chunk of medical debt i wouldn't mind #being a digital nomad for a few months out of the year #go see people i like across the pond see pompeii see rome see ireland see spain see australia see japan #so many....#theres people that want to hear the pitter patter of tiny feet before they die #then theres me that wants to see all the cool ancient human things before it disappears or before i leave earth and go home #one of the few big fears i have is it wont happen in this life #but hey i didnt think i was gonna make it past 23 let alone make it to 32 #i didnt think i was ever gonna get out of my abusive household and out of my old shitty life #but im here so who knows what could happen right?#not magenta or fuchsia but some other pink variation #i just need to roll out a pink color palette and start assigning emotions to them at this point 😂#magenta is my vent word #fuchsia is my vent word for good things #idk wtf this is its a combo

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kaidanalenkosprmanager · 7 months ago

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THE BEST OF PRIORITY: THE CITADEL (PART 1)

Featuring: Cmdr. Sophie Shepard, Lt. James Vega, EDI, and Thane Krios With: Flight Lt. Jeff "Joker" Moreau, Councilor Rannadril Bibsos Tembin Lesti Bensin Valern, Cmdr. Armando-Owen Bailey, and Kai Leng Kalahira, this one's heart is pure, but beset by wickedness and contention. Guide this one to where the traveler never tires, the lover never leaves, the hungry never starve. Guide this one, Kalahira, and she will be a companion to you as she was to me. Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)

#mira makes gifs ✨#sophie shepard #james vega #EDI #thane krios #jeff joker moreau #mass effect #mass effect 3 #me3 #mass effect legendary edition #dailygaming #priority citadel is one of my favorite priority missions in the game so it’s a fun one to gif!#i absolutely love how much thane content you get in the front end of the mission since thane is one of my favorites!#and bailey is one of my favorite npcs in the game so i adore that he gets a bit of a spotlight role in a bigger mission too!#but i will say that i do think priority citadel has some.. writing issues? to put it mildly?#i think my biggest problem is that i feel like everything with udina feels like it kinda just comes out of left field #like it feels like there’s VERY little build up for what happens with udina being a cerberus plant #the idea is interesting!! but i wish there was much more build up for it? it’s sort of just- there for me and it just comes at you so fast #like udina had always been sort of portrayed as a kind of shifty/power hungry character (don’t get me wrong)#but the cerberus plot line seemed VERY hastily thrown in and i wish there was a bit more subtle nodding to it throughout earlier missions #and i could write essays about how i wish kai leng was written better #but people who write much more eloquently than i do can put it in much better words than i can what problems there are with his writing #i think he had potential to be a super interesting character if he was introduced earlier and was much less stereotypical in form #also i’m sorry mr. leng but miranda wears the armor better (I SAID IT AND I WONT APOLOGIZE FOR IT)#the fight between kai leng and thane is *chef’s kiss* 👌 tho (i adore the cinematography of the shots as a video editing bitch)#ME3 has very nice fight choreography in some of the cutscenes (especially the ones with kai leng and the phantoms)#thane krios will always be my beloved and in canon he and soph develop a mutual respect over their hand to hand combat skills :)#also i forgot to say joker looking so absolutely done with everything in that first gif is me irl ✨

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eebie · 1 year ago

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meteor shenanigans are the most fun to write

#i imagine they mustve gotten so fucking bored on there and just did whatever #To keep themselves from sinking into understimulation hell #Dave rose and kanaya my favorite dynamics to write even though this was my first time doing kanaya i had a lot pf fun with her #But im sure i dont reallt have her character voice yet it comes with practice ig #theyre just so silly together ^-^#like a little trio of birds all hanging out in the same birdbath #My drabbles #homestuck #hc dave mispronouncing silly shit because #he probably barely talked irl bc who tr was he gonna chat with ?? Bro?????? LMAO #and as someone who reads more words than i speak . tha struggle is real sometimes #I used to say variety like viarity. Like rarity from mlp #Anyways one of my friends keeps going on about how someone wont stop bringing up the way they pronounce lasagna So that’s what inspired thi #FUCK I JUST NOTIF3D A BAD TYPO BUT PPL AOREADY REGLOGGED THISSS #I fixed it but its already t0o lateee

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