#but the shitposts have been good tho

[ailbhetross32]

Me and the homies waiting for Elon to turn us into Orange Faygo

[tongjaitongjai]

CrypticGod!Merlin and Worshipper aka fanboy Mordred CRACK AU - Part 3

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Merlin learns that being a god in semi-mortal form is very difficult when having a strong follower like Mordred.

Mordred, like many who pray to their god as some kind of anchor, will often pray something along the lines of ‘Emrys, give me strength and courage’ or ‘Emrys, please be with me through this difficult time’ unconsciously.

Except, unlike the normies, his commitment and belief are EXTREMELY STRONG, so when he prays strong enough, HIS GOD ACTUALLY SHOWS UP:

Arthur, charging him during sparring: Come on, Mordred! You can do better than this!!

Mordred: (anxiously praying) Emrys helps me

Merlin, suddenly appears between Arthur and Mordred, with Arthur about to smash him with the sword: THE FUCK—

Obviously, he is banned from praying during sparring, but occasionally Merlin will still pop up out of nowhere when he is anxious, and the knights eventually have to get used to it:

Arthur: Today, the neighbouring kingdom’s knights will join us for the practice, and there will be some competitions. I hope all of you are ready to protect and uphold the honour of Camelot’s knights. Any defeat is unacc—-

Arthur:

Arthur: any defeat is understandable, for one must lose before learning true victory, so please don’t get too stressed, especially you, Mordred.

Mordred: How do you know I am stressed?

Gwaine, carrying Merlin, who pop up above his head the moment Arthur said ‘defeat’, on his neck : Yeah, I wonder how

As their relationship improves, the power of Mordred’s prayer gets stronger. Not only can Merlin feels his emotions and more in-depth thoughts through the prayer, it also affects Merlin’s power, in both endearing and also straight-up ridiculous ways.

Lancelot, whispers: You are very upset because of that Lord Asshole’s shitty comment toward the Druids, aren’t you.

Mordred, calm and composed: No, I am a knight of Camelot and a grown man, I will not be bothered by something so trivial. I am not upset at all.

Lancelot: You aren’t praying to Merlin now are you.

Mordred: How is that relevant?

Merlin: *BARGING INTO THE MEETING* *SHOOTING FIRE BEAMS FROM HIS EYE, DESTROYING THE PATH AS HE WALKS* *GRABBING LORD ASSHOLE BY A COLLAR THEN PROCEEDS TO GERMAN SUPLEX HIM ON THE TABLE*

Arthur, watching this happens for the third time this week:

Arthur: Mordred, we talked about this, you have to express your thoughts and feelings verbally, not by praying to Merlin

Merlin: Don’t force him Arthur! He will talk when he is ready!

Arthur: STOP SPOILING HIM YOU ARE JUST HAPPY YOU GET TO PUNCH NOBLES

Also, when he is extremely happy, he prays to Merlin as well, like ‘Thanks Emrys for all the good fortunes that happen to me today’

Elyan: Arthur complimented Mordred at training today didn’t he? Maybe saying something like ‘you are going to be one of Camelot finest knights soon’

Percival: How do you know??? you were not there today????

Elyan, watching Merlin’s skin glows, not even in an oh so beautiful ethereal way but like a radioactive sun way: It’s .. hard to miss…

The first time Mordred wins a tournament, Merlin radiates for three days straight. His voice also sounds godly with all the weirdly smooth echoes and harp melody complimenting his every word. Mordred is exhilarated. Arthur is going insane. Merlin finally officially bans Mordred from praying to him.

[lucabyte]

what the hell is this thing that just appeared in my save file and how the fuck do i get it to leave

[guinevereslancelot]

applied to a bunch of jobs! 😅🙏

[des-fangirl]

attention please in werewolf au Vimes & Angua are even COOLER!!!

[moongothic]

Counter-counter point: Oda tends to draw a LOT of little boys with VERY similar faces, so i think its notable that, as an adult (since Luffy is, also an adult) Crocodile seems to have the strongest resemblance to Luffy (although im fairly sure the ‘what if dragon is actually Garp’s son-in-law’ theory is dead)

-the entire existence of Sabo kind of puts a LOT on the table that Oda seems willing to do with Luffy’s backstory, conventional logic be damned

-i can 1000% believe that Dragon is sort of just a weirdo. Thought Luffy’s mom was special? Feels guilty leaving a kid with Garp? Just general ‘this kid is the one’ vibes?

-can you imagine how funny it would be to come out that Luffy and Vivi were half siblings the entire time?

Counter-counter-counterpoints:

Older Good-timeline Luffy does look a lot like Garp too

The Garp Genes can not be denied (also yes Luffy Age 40 does resemble Crocodile, he can resemble both at the same time (it's just the same face syndrome lmao)) (also also yeah I have discussed the "what if Dragon isn't Garp's son" thing in the past and how I don't believe in the theory, we can agree on that)

Honestly I don't have issues with Sabo's backstory/existence beyond how he feels almost like a replacement for Ace in the story as far as Luffy having a brother goes, but that has more to do with when and how he was introduced into the story along with how Ace was handled rather than the character's backstory itself

Okay to be fair Luffy does indeed have the Power to Draw In People's Faith etc etc, so Dragon could become oddly facinated by Baby Loof from that fact alone. And I do like the concept of Dragon being at least a little bit a loser but that's just me

Crocodile knocking up Alabasta's To-Be-Queen and then stealing the baby before Cobra ever met his to-be-wife would be a hysterical twist ngl

But you know what.

In the spirit of Absurdist Theory Crafting, I wish to one-up you with A Horrible Concept;

What if the Dragon we know isn't the "real" Monkey D. Dragon. What if Garp originally had ""a daughter"" instead, who hated the Marines and everything they stood for, who ran into some Freedom Fighter Guy and his Queer Bestie, transed his gender and switched identities/names with the Freedom Fighter Guy just to make sure Garp would never find the real him. "Crocodile" goes off to enjoy a life of piracy while "Dragon" now pretends to be Garp's new transgender son, and Garp is none the wiser (though oddly accepting of the trans part, just not the Freedom Fighter-ing). And the only other person who knows the truth is the Queer Bestie Ivankov. And NOW we re-introduce the "Dragon isn't Luffy's real dad" back into the mix, because yeah the Freedom Fighter Guy might not be Luffy's dad, but the real Dragon aka Crocodile IS! >8D

And that's how we get Luffy looking like Garp and Crocodile but not Dragon

[thesherrinfordfacility]

at some point the blessed day will come where i can scroll through neil gaimans asks trying to find a particular ask that isn't coming up on google/tumblr search/in his masterpost and not feel my body tense up in visceral anticipation of seeing the babygirl incident™

[museganjin]

i saw the tag "lunette kinda looks like stewie from family guy here. sorry" on this post and took it as a challenge

@starrysharks

[across-stars]

[korixae]

OMFG i canttt y’all i just found out i can’t watch gos2 when it drops at 1am 😭😭😭 are you fucking kidding me i might have to wait 10 whole ass hours before i can watch it 💔

[economically-not-a-communist]

Every once in a while I have to make sure I'm interacting a normal amount with normal women and actual feminism every once in a while, to avoid falling into the transsex-male-to-rampant-misogynist pipeline. Far too easy to go from "radfems and gender abolitionists are literally the scum of the earth" (true statement) to "well maybe all feminism is bullshit" (not at all true statement) to "trans women are somehow lesser than trans men, and all women are evil and out to get Us" (batshit crazy).

[gothamcityneedsme]

scrolling ao3 and saw a vtm/batfam crossover and suddenly im completely normal

[yeonjun4beagles]

the way i cant live without her even for just one day lmao

[guinevereslancelot]

quick everyone say happy birthday to my cat

[kxllerblond]

I could write a serious HC and it IS sorta serious buuut:

Telepathy isn't something I explore often here because it's a nuisance to juggle into threads without a lot of communication and consensual god modding but just know that he's VERY good at keeping other telepaths out.

Most of the time you'll just get something I can just describe as this echo of dark static (and a very aware and perturbed Clark looking your way) if you try and wiggle into his head without him letting you. You get the same thing if you try and wiggle into places he doesn't want you even when you do get invited in for a two to tango mind convo. But, sometimes, when he's feeling very silly and goofy-—you might get some abysmal shitpost tossed right back through the communication line you stupidly opened.

[dnptheinfinity]

did i procrastinate the tit sims render until now? yes. BUT i did finally find the phlonde hair for phil, i'm finally free