#but the other half actually makes some sense
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OKAY SO... The actual theory I'm leaning toward is kind of a mix of the first two, that Marinette has taken measures to ensure he only has half his ring (or a full fake), most likely with Felix's help.
I think it'd make sense as a compromise with what they both ideally want and how deeply they both want to keep him safe for Felix to be keeping half somewhere safe and them to let Adrien have the other half so he is still carrying his own force of will just as much as if he had both. And I think that us not seeing an Amok wasn't just coincidence. And I don't think she would have taken any risk if she wasn't confident it would work; the hesitation seemed more like irrational fear she was wrong and needing to remind herself she knew it would be fine.
That said, to add a few other thoughts that friends and I were throwing around last night just for the speculation party.
As much as I think Felix would hate to do it, for Adrien's sake, I could see him begrudgingly helping Ladybug practice dealing with Amoks. That could involve double checking that a (different) amok put into two (different) rings wouldn't be released by breaking one + an empty copy of the other, I guess there's technically a case for "The Holder Sets The Limit" where she could have learned to break an object in such a way that it only releases what she wants it to? Doesn't feel likely, but not entirely outside the realm of possibility...
More fun theory: He was still Cat Noir when that happened, and the Black Cat specifically messes with the rules of the Peacock. We know when Sentis are Cataclysm'd, they "go out of control", and Kagami's line in Risk about "cut your strings" still feels like it could come into play someday. But he's been Cataclysm'd before, in Miraculer, and possibilities for that are basically: (1) Plagg is extra resistant to his own power, fully possible; (2) he was severed from his ties and free for 5 minutes but Ladybug "fixed" it, horribly hilarious but possible; or (3) Plagg just breaks the rules of how Peacock stuff should work entirely, or some mix of this and 1.
Alternative to the above: Being transformed AT ALL is temporary protection. Cat Noir is not Adrien. Marinette isn't Ladybug. Felix trying to bring Marinette back from the Red Moon power didn't work because Marinette didn't exist while Ladybug did.
Of course the main problem with the latter two theories is LADYBUG wouldn't know about that, and I still don't think she'd do it without being absolutely sure, but there's no reason there can't be multiple layers of stuff going on, and theorizing is fun, ehehe.
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SYMPHONY OF US ⌇음악
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/458f725eac388f6d933eba48cd8b4cfb/e076ec17de339ac8-e8/s540x810/4824c9980390850a5d55069b1fd42a7f92eb8454.jpg)
FLIRT ALERT! series⌇Park Jongseong | Next
pairing ᝰ jay x fem!reader — word count: 4.6k+
⌇ … warnings & genre ↺ college au!, friends to lovers, mutual pining, bantering, song composer x guitarist, fluff, kissing.
synopsis — As music majors in college, You and Jay have always been seatmates in class—passing notes, sharing playlists, and teasing each other between lectures. But when you get paired for the annual Valentine’s Open Mic Night, your usual banter turns into long practice sessions, late-night coffee runs, and a song that sounds a little too much like a love confession.
lee's ₊˚⊹ ᰔ comment ┊Hey Ermmuhh I couldn’t sleep so I cooked this one up and I actually like it. Guys I would do anything for guitar Jay, whos with me.. raise your hand..
The first time you ever sat next to Jay, it wasn’t by choice.
The lecture hall had been packed, students filing into seats with that first-week energy—half of them eager, the other half exhausted. You had arrived late, the only open seat left beside a guy in a coat, his foot tapping lightly against the floor in a steady rhythm.
“Bad day?” he had asked as you slumped into the seat.
You had barely looked at him before muttering, “Bad parking.”
That had made him chuckle. “Yeah, parking’s a nightmare.” Then, as if he could sense your irritation, he slid a packet of sheet music onto your desk. “Here. Since you missed the first part.”
That was the beginning of it.
For the rest of the year, Jay remained your unofficial seatmate. You didn’t plan it—it just happened. Every class, every semester, no matter the time or the professor, there was an unspoken agreement that you would end up beside each other. He passed you scribbled jokes in the margins of his notes, you stole his guitar picks, and somehow, you two had developed a routine that made even the dullest lectures bearable.
So when the Professor announced that the Valentine’s Open Mic Night would be a graded project this year, it wasn’t a surprise when he paired you and Jay together. What was surprising was the flicker of hesitation on Jay’s face when your names were called.
“You good?” you asked as you packed your things after class.
Jay blinked, snapping out of whatever thought had been on his mind. “Yeah. Just… never done a duet before.”
You raised a brow. “You literally performed at the Winter Recital last semester.”
“That was different.”
“How?”
He adjusted the strap of his bag, glancing down at his shoes before flashing you a lopsided grin. “I didn’t have to sing with you.”
You rolled your eyes, bumping his shoulder with yours. “Relax, I’ll try not to make you sound bad.”
And that was it. That was how your simple routine with Jay turned into something a little bit more.
You would think that after almost a year of sitting next to each other, sharing notes, and teasing back and forth, you two would have naturally grown closer. But there had always been a boundary—an invisible line neither of you dared to cross. You weren’t sure if it was because of the way Jay always seemed so effortlessly cool, or because you had convinced yourself that your dynamic worked best when there were no expectations beyond the classroom.
But something about today felt different.
As he turned to leave, you blurted out, “Would you like to get some coffee?!”
Jay froze mid-step at your sudden outburst, then turned slowly to meet your gaze. The smirk that curled at his lips sent a flicker of heat to your face.
“You asking me out?”
Your entire body stiffened. “No! No,” you rushed to say, waving your hands frantically. “I mean—for our music piece. Y’know? So we can brainstorm or whatever.”
Jay tilted his head, pretending to consider it, even though you could tell he was enjoying your flustered reaction way too much. After a beat, he shrugged. “Alright. Lead the way.”
Fifteen minutes later, you were sitting across from him in a small café just off campus, a half-empty coffee cup between your hands. The place was cozy, the hum of conversation mixing with the soft jazz playing overhead.
Jay had abandoned his coat, rolling up the sleeves of his long sleeved shirt as he leaned back in his chair, watching you with mild amusement. “You’re overthinking it.”
You frowned. “What? No, I’m not.”
“You totally are,” he said, tapping a finger against your notebook. “Look at this. You’ve got three different song structures written down, but you haven’t committed to any of them.”
You groaned, running a hand through your hair. “Because I don’t know what works best. I mean, do we go for something upbeat? Or do we lean into the whole Valentine’s theme and make it, like… disgustingly romantic?”
Jay huffed a laugh, picking up his coffee. “You sound like love songs personally offend you.”
“They do when they’re forced,” you muttered, tapping your pen against the table. “I just don’t want it to sound fake, y’know?”
Jay was quiet for a moment, watching you carefully. Then he leaned forward, resting his arms on the table. “So let’s not make it fake.”
You blinked. “What?”
He nudged your notebook toward you. “Let’s write something real. Doesn’t have to be some cheesy love song. Just something that actually means something to us.”
The sincerity in his voice caught you off guard. For all the teasing and banter, Jay had a way of slipping in these unexpectedly earnest moments that made you pause.
You exhaled slowly, nodding. “Alright. Something real.”
“Good.” He grinned. “And if it just so happens to be a love song, well…” He shot you a teasing look. “Guess that says something about us, huh?”
Your heart stuttered in your chest, but you forced yourself to roll your eyes. “Don’t make stupid jokes.”
Jay just laughed, but even as you refocused on your notes, you couldn’t shake the feeling that, somehow, things were changing between you two.
The two of you sat in comfortable silence for a while, the low hum of the cafe filling in the gaps as you both stared at your notebooks. Every so often, Jay would absentmindedly tap his fingers against the table, a steady rhythm that somehow made it easier for you to think.
You glanced up at him. “So, what’s something real to you?”
Jay’s fingers paused mid-tap. He looked at you, eyebrows raising slightly, as if he hadn’t expected you to actually ask. Then, after a moment, he shrugged. “Music, obviously. Late-night drives. My guitars. Oh, and good coffee.” He lifted his cup in emphasis before taking a sip.
You hummed, jotting down a few words in your notebook. “Alright, so we’re writing a love song about caffeine addiction.”
Jay chuckled. “That’s what you got from that?”
“You said ‘good coffee.’ That’s passion.”
He rolled his eyes but leaned forward, glancing at your notebook. “Okay, your turn. What’s something real to you?”
You hesitated, tapping your pen against the page. It was a simple question, but answering it felt more intimate than you had expected.
“Uh… sunrises,” you said finally. “When you’ve been up all night, and everything’s quiet for a few minutes before the world wakes up. That first breath of cold air in the morning. And…” You trailed off, feeling suddenly self-conscious.
Jay tilted his head, waiting. “And?”
You exhaled, deciding to just go for it. “That feeling when you’re playing music, writing it, and for a second, it’s like… everything just clicks.”
Jay was quiet. When you looked up, he wasn’t smirking or teasing. He was just watching you, something unreadable in his expression.
“Yeah,” he said, voice softer now. “I get that.”
Something shifted then—an unspoken understanding settling between you.
Jay reached for his guitar case beside his chair, flipping open the latches. “Alright,” he said, adjusting the strap over his shoulder. “Let’s see what we’ve got so far.”
You bit your lip, flipping through your notes. “I mean, we don’t have much yet, but…”
Jay started strumming, a simple, easy melody filling the space between you. You listened, letting the rhythm settle in before you hesitantly hummed a melody over it.
Jay’s lips curled into a smile. “That works. Keep going.”
And just like that, the song started to take shape.
Hours later, you were still at the café, empty cups pushed to the side as you sat next to Jay in the booth, your notebooks a mess of scribbled lyrics and crossed-out ideas.
“Alright, what about this?” Jay said, adjusting his guitar. He played a soft progression, nodding toward you. “Try it with the lyrics we just fixed.”
You took a breath and sang the first few lines, the words tentative but starting to feel more natural the more you repeated them. Jay watched you as you sang, his eyes focused—not in the way he usually looked at you when he was about to tease you, but in a way that made something in your chest tighten.
When you finished, he nodded slowly. “That was good.”
You laughed lightly, nudging his shoulder. “Yeah?”
Jay’s grin returned, but there was something gentler about it this time. “Yeah. We still have a lot to work on but.. its good.”
You glanced at the clock, realizing how late it had gotten. “We should probably head back before they kick us out.”
Jay sighed dramatically, strumming one last chord before setting his guitar aside. “Fine. But only because I don’t want them banning me from my favorite cafe.”
You rolled your eyes but smiled as you started packing up your things. As the two of you stepped outside, the cold night air bit at your skin, and you shivered. Before you could react, Jay wordlessly shrugged off his coat and draped it over your shoulders.
You blinked at him. “Jay—”
“Don’t start,” he said, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “You looked cold.”
Your heart did a stupid little flip, but you quickly masked it with a playful smirk. “This is just an excuse to save your seat tomorrow isn’t it?”
Jay shot you a playful hurt look. “Wow, you think so little of me.”
You laughed, hugging his coat closer around you as the two of you walked back toward campus, the melody of your half-written song still lingering in the air.
The next few days fell into an easy rhythm—class, study sessions, and sneaking into the music room whenever it was free. You and Jay spent more time together than ever, working through melodies, tweaking lyrics, and getting lost in conversations that had nothing to do with the song at all.
And somehow, somewhere between all of that, the line between “just seatmates” and something more started to blur.
“Okay, one more run-through,” Jay said, adjusting the tuning pegs on his guitar.
You groaned, leaning your head back against the piano bench. “Jay, we’ve done like… twelve run-throughs.”
He shot you a look. “And yet you still mess up the second verse.”
“Hey!” You sat up, pointing at him accusingly. “I wouldn’t mess it up if you didn’t look at me like that.”
Jay smirked. “Like what?”
“Like you’re trying not to laugh every time I hit the high note.”
“I am trying not to laugh,” he admitted, eyes twinkling. “Not because of your singing—your singing’s great. It’s just…” He paused, grinning. “You scrunch up your nose when you go for high notes. It’s cute.”
Your breath hitched for a second.
Jay must’ve realized what he said, because his fingers fumbled over the guitar strings. He cleared his throat, suddenly focused on his instrument.
You stared at him, the warmth creeping up your neck completely unrelated to the heated room. Instead of responding, you exhaled and picked up your lyrics sheet. “One more run-through,” you mumbled.
Jay glanced at you, lips twitching. “One more.”
By now, late-night practice had become routine. But this was the first time you’d ended up at Jay’s apartment.
“Make yourself comfortable,” he said, tossing his keys onto the counter.
You glanced around, taking in the space. It was exactly what you expected—minimalist, with music posters and a guitar stand in the corner. A few records were stacked near a player, and his desk was cluttered with sheet music and unfinished compositions.
“You live like an actual musician,” you mused, running a finger over a worn-out lyric book on his desk.
Jay snorted. “I thought I gave off business major energy.”
You rolled your eyes, but your gaze landed on the couch, where a soft-looking blanket was draped over the armrest. You raised an eyebrow. “You keep a blanket on your couch?”
Jay glanced over and shrugged. “Yeah?”
You smirked. “Didn’t take you for a cozy guy.”
He leaned against the counter, arms crossed. “I have layers.”
You laughed, shaking your head as you settled onto the couch. Jay sat beside you, guitar in hand. The song was almost finished now, just a few refinements left before the performance.
“You wanna run through it again?” you asked, pulling your knees up.
Jay nodded, but he hesitated, fingers hovering over the strings. When you looked at him, he wasn’t smirking or teasing like usual. There was something thoughtful in his gaze, something… uncertain.
Jay’s fingers moved over the guitar strings effortlessly, the melody filling the space between you. Your voice wove through it, soft but steady, carrying the lyrics you’d both spent hours perfecting.
But tonight—tonight, the song felt different.
It wasn’t just words on a page anymore. It wasn’t just an assignment. It was something heavier, something unspoken. Something neither of you dared to name.
When the last note faded, silence settled between you.
Jay exhaled, setting his guitar aside. “That was…” He trailed off, as if searching for the right words.
You nodded slowly, barely above a whisper. “Yeah.”
Neither of you moved.
You were still sitting cross-legged on the couch, his blanket draped loosely over your shoulders. Jay was beside you, leaning against the cushions, his arm resting on the back of the couch. Close. Closer than before.
The tension hung thick in the air, pressing against your skin.
Jay’s gaze flickered to your lips for half a second—so quick you might’ve imagined it. But then his fingers twitched against his knee, his throat bobbing as he swallowed.
And suddenly, you knew.
You knew that if you leaned in, if you closed the space between you, something would happen.
Your pulse pounded.
Jay shifted slightly, his knee brushing against yours. He wasn’t smirking, wasn’t teasing—just watching you, waiting, like he was caught in the same pull that had tightened around your chest.
Your breath hitched.
Jay tilted his head just a little, like he was debating something. Like he was giving you the chance to stop this before it went somewhere neither of you could take back.
Your heart was a drumline in your chest.
Your fingers curled around the edge of the blanket.
You should move. Say something. Anything.
But you didn’t.
Instead, your gaze dropped—just briefly—to his lips. And that was all it took.
Jay leaned in.
Your breath tangled with his, warmth ghosting over your skin. Your lashes fluttered. He was close enough now that you could see the night shine in his dark eyes, close enough that you could feel the slight hitch in his breathing.
A fraction of an inch. That’s all that was left.
Then—
BZZZT.
Jay jerked back, exhaling sharply as his phone vibrated against the coffee table.
The hypnotic spell shattered.
You blinked, heart still hammering, trying to process what almost just happened.
Jay cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. “Uh. I should… probably check that.” His voice was slightly hoarse.
You nodded stiffly, gripping the blanket tighter around your shoulders. “Yeah. Yeah, go ahead.”
Jay reached for his phone, glancing at the screen. “It’s my friend Jungwon,” he muttered, like that somehow explained the whiplash of the moment you’d just shared.
You took the opportunity to stand, needing space, needing to breathe. “I should—um, I should go. It’s late.”
Jay’s head snapped up. “Wait—”
But you were already grabbing your things, shoving your notebook into your bag. Your fingers still trembled slightly.
Jay stood too, stepping toward you, but he hesitated. Like he wasn’t sure if he should stop you. Like he wasn’t sure what to say after what just happened.
And honestly? Neither were you.
So instead, you forced a small, strained smile. “See you tomorrow?”
Jay held your gaze for a beat longer, something unreadable in his eyes.
Then, finally, he nodded. “Yeah. See you tomorrow.”
You turned quickly, stepping out of his apartment before you could second-guess yourself.
The night air was cold against your burning skin.
And as you walked away, heart still racing, one thought repeated in your head over and over again.
What the hell just happened?
The Valentine’s Open Mic Night had arrived.
The auditorium buzzed with energy—students chattering excitedly, couples whispering to each other, friends hyping up performers. The warm glow of stage lights bathed the room in a golden hue, casting long shadows against the red-and-white Valentine’s decorations.
Backstage, you paced.
“Stop doing that,” Jay said from his spot on a folding chair, tuning his guitar for what had to be the hundredth time.
You shot him a look. “Doing what?”
“Walking back and forth like you’re about to confess to a crime.”
“I feel like I’m about to confess to a crime,” you muttered, rubbing your arms. “Why does this suddenly feel so intense?”
Jay smirked, resting his guitar on his lap. “Maybe because we wrote a song that sounds suspiciously like a love confession?”
Your heart jumped in your chest. “It’s not a love confession,” you shot back, a little too quickly.
Jay arched an eyebrow. “Are you sure?”
You opened your mouth—ready to argue, ready to insist that the song was just a song, nothing more—but the words didn’t come out.
Because the truth was, ever since you’d started rehearsing for this performance, something had felt… off. Not about the music itself—the melody was strong, the lyrics flowed effortlessly—but about the way it made you feel.
Every time you sang it, every time Jay harmonized with you, there was this undeniable weight behind it. Something unspoken, something too close to the surface.
And the more you listened to it, the more familiar it felt.
Like you’d heard it before.
Like you’d felt it before.
You swallowed, voice quieter now. “…Jay.”
His smirk faded slightly. “Yeah?”
You hesitated, but then the realization hit you so hard, you couldn’t stop the words from spilling out.
“This song,” you murmured, gripping the hem of your sleeve. “It sounds like us.”
Jay stilled. His fingers froze on the guitar strings.
For a moment, neither of you said anything.
Then, he let out a slow breath, tilting his head at you. “You just figured that out?”
Your heart stuttered. “You knew?”
Jay’s lips twitched—not in amusement, but in something softer, something almost… shy. “I had a feeling.”
Your pulse roared in your ears. “And you didn’t say anything?”
Jay shrugged, glancing down at his guitar. “I figured you’d realize it eventually.”
Your mind spun. You thought back to every late-night practice session, every lyric you had painstakingly written with him, every melody that had come so naturally between you. You thought about how easily the words had formed, how every note had fit perfectly.
And then it hit you.
This wasn’t just a song.
This was your song. Yours and Jay’s. A reflection of everything between you—the teasing, the late-night conversations, the moments you’d never dared to name.
It wasn’t a forced Valentine’s song. It was real.
And it was about him.
The announcer’s voice crackled through the mic. “Next up, we have a duet from two of our very own music majors. Give it up for—”
You barely heard the introduction. Your heart was hammering too loudly, your thoughts running too fast.
Jay stood, slinging his guitar strap over his shoulder. But before he could step forward, he turned to you, eyes searching yours.
There was something unspoken in his gaze, something that said, We don’t have to do this if you’re not ready.
But the thing was—you were ready.
Because now, standing here on the brink of something terrifying and real, you knew one thing for certain.
You weren’t just about to sing a song.
You were about to tell Jay—in front of an entire audience—exactly how you felt.
Even if you hadn’t meant to.
Even if he already knew.
You took a deep breath, steadied your racing heart, and stepped onto the stage with him.
The last note hung in the air, trembling like a secret waiting to be spoken.
Then, silence.
For a split second, everything stood still—your hands gripping the mic, Jay’s fingers frozen on the last chord, your breaths coming fast and uneven. You could still feel the weight of the song between you, still hear the echoes of every word that had slipped past your lips.
Then the auditorium erupted.
Applause, whistles, cheers—loud and overwhelming. The sound crashed over you, breaking through the haze that had settled during the performance.
Your chest rose and fell, heartbeat still trying to catch up with everything that had just happened. Slowly, you turned to Jay.
He was already looking at you.
The stage lights painted him in gold, catching the softness in his gaze, the hint of something unspoken lingering in the way his fingers were still curled around his guitar.
For a second, neither of you moved.
Then, Jay exhaled, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He tilted his head slightly, eyes searching yours.
We did it.
You nodded.
And just like that, the moment passed.
Jay turned back toward the mic, running a hand through his hair before giving the audience a lopsided grin. “Well,” he said, voice slightly breathless. “That was fun.”
A few laughs rippled through the crowd.
You could still feel the rush of adrenaline in your veins, your mind spinning from everything—the song, the way Jay had looked at you, the way the lyrics felt too real.
The host walked back onstage, grinning as he clapped his hands. “Wow. That was… incredible.” He turned to you and Jay, eyes twinkling. “Now, I gotta ask—was that just a performance, or was that something real?”
Laughter and teasing whistles rang through the crowd. Your breath hitched.
Jay glanced at you.
The stage lights made it impossible to see the audience clearly, but you could feel every pair of eyes watching, waiting.
Jay hesitated for only a second. Then, with a smirk, he leaned toward the mic.
“I guess that’s up to interpretation.”
The crowd groaned in playful frustration, but Jay just chuckled, sending you a quick, unreadable glance before standing up and adjusting his guitar strap.
You huffed out a breathless laugh, shaking your head as the host ushered you both toward the wings.
The second you stepped offstage, the noise of the crowd muffled behind the curtain, a strange weight settled in your chest.
Jay stood beside you, shifting his guitar on his back. He didn’t say anything right away, just let out a quiet exhale before turning to you.
For a moment, it was just the two of you again. No audience. No stage. No expectations.
Just you, Jay, and the song that had said everything you hadn’t.
He opened his mouth, like he wanted to say something.
But before he could, someone called his name from the other side of the curtain, and the moment slipped away.
Jay hesitated for half a second, gaze lingering on yours—like he was waiting. Like there was something unfinished between you.
Then, with a small, knowing smile, he gave you a nod.
“C’mon,” he said softly. “Let’s go.”
And just like that, he walked away, leaving you standing there—heart still pounding, lyrics still echoing in your head, and a quiet, unshakable feeling that whatever this was between you and Jay…
It was just beginning.
BONUS 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
It started slow.
Not because either of you were unsure—because, really, after that song, after that performance, there was no denying what had been brewing for a while between you two—but because neither of you wanted to ruin what was already there.
The playful banter, the late-night coffee runs, the way you always saved him a seat in class, the way he always texted you first whenever he found a song he knew you’d love.
So for a while, nothing changed.
At least, not obviously.
But then there were the small things. The little shifts that made it clear that something was different.
Like the way Jay’s arm would rest along the back of your chair a little longer than necessary. The way his fingers would brush against yours when he handed you a sheet of music, lingering just a second too long. The way his texts became softer—not that they weren’t teasing, because Jay would always be Jay—but now they came with an undertone of something more:
Jay:
Late-night practice? I’ll bring coffee.
Song idea. I need your genius input. Also, your voice.
Are we calling this “studying” even if we just end up talking the whole time?
(Not that I’m complaining.)
And then there were the moments between the music.
Like the first time he reached for your hand without a joke to hide behind. You had been sitting in the empty auditorium after a long practice session, your head leaning against the back of your chair, exhaustion weighing heavy in your limbs.
Jay had stretched, rolling out his shoulders, and then—without looking at you—he just took your hand.
No teasing smirk. No offhand comment. Just his fingers curling around yours like it was the most natural thing in the world.
And it was.
Or the time he had walked you home after another late-night coffee run, and instead of his usual casual “See you tomorrow”, he had hesitated at your doorstep, looking at you like he was thinking about something.
You had raised an eyebrow. “What?”
Jay had tilted his head, lips twitching in amusement. “Nothing,” he had murmured. “Just… realizing I might be in trouble.”
Your heart had flipped. “Trouble?”
“For liking you too much,” he had said easily. “Feels dangerous.”
And you had laughed—because of course Jay would confess something like that with a smirk and a joke—but you had still felt your face heat up.
(And okay, maybe you had reached for his hoodie, tugging him forward just enough to kiss him on the cheek before quickly ducking inside and shutting the door behind you.)
And then there was now.
Sitting in the music room, your back against the grand piano, Jay��s guitar resting across his lap as he absently strummed through a melody you hadn’t heard before.
You tilted your head. “New song?”
Jay hummed. “Maybe.”
You arched an eyebrow. “Let me guess. Another love song?”
He smirked but didn’t deny it. “What can I say? Got a lot of inspiration lately.”
You rolled your eyes, but your heart fluttered anyway.
Jay’s fingers slowed over the strings as he glanced at you, expression thoughtful. “You know,” he said, “I don’t think I ever actually asked you.”
You frowned slightly. “Asked me what?”
Jay set his guitar aside, turning to face you fully. “If I can be your boyfriend.”
Your stomach flipped. “Jay—”
“I know, I know,” he interrupted with a grin. “It’s kinda obvious at this point. But still.” His voice softened, eyes meeting yours. “I wanna hear you say it.”
You exhaled, shaking your head at him. Hopeless.
But still, you smiled, nudging his foot with yours. “Jay, you’ve been my boyfriend since the moment we wrote that song.”
His expression shifted—just slightly. Just enough for you to catch the flicker of something real in his eyes.
Then, in typical Jay fashion, he smirked. “Oh, so you’re admitting it was a love song?”
You groaned, laughing as you reached over to shove his shoulder. “Shut up.”
Jay caught your wrist before you could pull away, tugging you toward him. And before you could react, before you could even tease him for it—
He kissed you.
Soft. Unhurried. Just enough pressure to steal your breath, just enough warmth to send a slow, steady hum through your veins.
When he pulled back, he grinned, voice barely above a whisper.
“So, you wanna write another one?”
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。 。 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐔𝐏 ( 이.𝐌𝐇 )─────엔시티
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( 二月 ). ──your best friend fell asleep on you, and suddenly he wasn't your friend anymore 이민형 &fem!rea. ⟡ drabble, fluff warn. kiss wc : 807HUN ++( 𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓇𝓈 )
노트 mark, as promised <3
You don’t know how it happened, however you weren’t complaining. No, nothing of the sort even crossed your mind.
All that was on your mind was how comfortable you felt despite the pins and needles in your hip. How warm you felt with arms wrapped around your waist. You could hear soft breaths taken against the silent air—your show lost on the ‘continue watching’ screen some time ago.
You’d blinked yourself awake a couple of minutes ago, not even realizing that you’d actually fallen asleep. When you woke up, you didn’t even know what day it was anymore either, pushed into the worst brain fog. However, the dream you were having was all sunshine and rainbows, you almost regretted coming back to reality. Well, that was until you saw that your best friend, Mark, had also fallen victim to just resting his eyes.
But then, reality hit, making your stomach drop.
Your best friend had fallen asleep too, somehow ending up with his head pressed into your side and arms paralyzing.
You bit your lip, feeling a little bad about reveling in such an intimate thing for friends to be doing. Of course you’d shared hugs and even held hands, Hell, it seemed he couldn’t be more than a couple inches from you sometimes, but that was always innocent. That was always because you were feeling uncomfortable, or anxious or something of the sort.
There was never anything between the lines to read.
Butterflies made you nauseous. You liked the feeling he instilled, but you hated that you shouldn’t actually be feeling it at all.
Should you wake him up? You could pretend you hadn’t been staring at him for the past however long then. But, on the other hand, you could make it a thing. Afterall, It was an opportunity to make the feeling yours to hold—make him yours to hold.
But No. No, you couldn’t.
You were friends, nothing more and nothing less. There were never any shades of gray. No stolen glances or prolonged eye contact. There was no tension, no lingering touches or sense of fleeting time. There was nothing, and you didn’t know anymore if you could take it.
People hadn’t even mistaken you for a couple before, and it hurt your pride a bit.
Why couldn’t you swallow it down and ask? Too scared to lose what you already had? Circles and circles you’d been running, but not getting very far. All the destinations led back to one thing—one very, very special man.
The man you loved.
You groaned at the thought, head hitting the arm of the couch. And suddenly Mark was awake, very aware of the position you two were in. It was your movement of disappointment (in yourself) that stirred him, your breathing and heartbeat queuing him in. The soft plush that only a body had, making him get up faster than you thought humanly possible.
“Oh my God,” He put his hands up like he was surrendering, “I’m sorry, I must’ve fallen asleep after you. I didn’t mean to,”
You lifted your head through all the commotion, being met with the sight that made your heart pick up speed. He looked so adorable half-awake; hair messy, and features swollen.
“I’m sorry.” He apologized again, “It just happened, like on an airplane when your head just—you know, drifts. You looked so peaceful, I guess I got jealous.” He tried to joke, an awkward laugh leaving his lips after the rant subsided.
You’d sat up some time during when he was talking at you, “It’s fine,” You sighed, now regretting ruining the moment more than turning your good dream off like the show you hadn’t been comprehending.
He was right, it was peaceful.
Mark brought peace to your life, a sense of clarity during the worst storm you’d ever lived through. He was the rain that brought flowers, the rainbow that brought color.
He was everything right in a left world.
“Don’t apologize to me.”
And just as quickly as he’d lifted from you, he was back in your space, this time soft lips against yours. Your eyes were wide when he pulled back, then his were too.
His mouth was slightly parted, broken sounds leaving it without real substance. You assumed they’d be more apologies, so before he had the chance to gather his thoughts you leaned back in, closing the distance you thought you’d put between you two.
Your hands found the side of his head, palms resting on his cheeks, pulling him as close as you could get. And, he didn’t protest.
You couldn’t decide if maybe you hadn’t actually woken up, because if you were having a good dream before, then this was the best one.
Your stomach was doing Olympic-level flips, gold medal acrobatics. But, at least, you could say the feeling was yours.
© loserlvrss 2024 / 25. 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗲𝗱.
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Fake it Til You Make it
pairing: boo seungkwan x f!reader | wc: 18K genre: coworkers au, fake dating au, fluff, humor, suggestive, angst warnings: language, alcohol consumption, suggestive scenes a/n: for cam&em’s lonely hearts cafe collab (everyone go read every fic or i will Find You) // this is a continuation of morning rush enormous thank you to @ylangelegy and @haologram for beta-ing this <3333
summary: You could honestly throttle Seokmin right now. Of all the half-baked, caffeine-fueled ideas he’s ever had, convincing the entire office that you and Seungkwan—your sworn nemesis and parking spot thief—are madly in love might just take the cake.
Seokmin has a plan. A really, really, really good plan. He’s sure of it.
Mostly.
He leans against the breakroom counter, nursing the world’s saddest cup of instant coffee, and considers the potential fallout. Sure, you and Seungkwan will probably strangle him (or, in your case, make an entire PowerPoint on “Why Lee Seokmin Deserves to Be Laid Off”), but the rewards outweigh the risks. Seokmin glances toward the hallway, where the faint sound of Aera and Ayoung’s laughter echoes, their voices just a pitch too smug. No, this plan is flawless. Foolproof. Nobel Prize-worthy, even.
All he has to do now is sell it to the two people who loathe each other the most in the office.
He hadn’t meant to open his mouth, but God, Aera and Ayoung had to have been demons crafted by the devil himself, the kind that thrived on overpriced lattes and the scent of shattered self-esteem. Seokmin had just been passing through the hallway, minding his own business—okay, eavesdropping a little—when he caught wind of their conversation.
“Honestly, I don’t know why she even bothers coming to these galas,” Aera had said, inspecting her manicure like it held the secrets of the universe. “It’s not like anyone actually notices her. She’s basically furniture.”
“Right? What’s the point if you don’t have someone on your arm?” Ayoung had added, with a theatrical sigh. “But then again, who would even want to go with her? She’s so…. ugh.”
The “ugh” had been the final straw. Seokmin hadn’t thought twice—he’d stormed over, ready to unleash a tirade about how you were the hardest-working person in the office, how you’d single-handedly carried your team through last quarter’s hellish project, and how you absolutely deserved more respect.
Instead, what came out of his mouth was: “Y/N has a date. Obviously.”
The two women blinked at him in unison, their perfectly sculpted eyebrows raising in surprise. “Oh?” Aera recovers quickly, tilting her head. “And who’s the lucky date? You?”
Seokmin laughed, loud and unconvincing. “Me? No, no, I’m going with Soonyoung, like I always do.”
Ayoung narrowed her eyes. “Then who?”
And this is where Seokmin’s brain had short-circuited. He glanced around the room, as if the walls might offer some divine intervention. Nothing. Just the faint hum of the vending machine. His mind raced, searching for a name that would shut them up, and then—
“Seungkwan,” he blurted out.
Both women stared at him, stunned. “Seungkwan?” Aera repeated, incredulous.
“Yep! Seungkwan,” Seokmin had said, doubling down because he knew there was no turning back. “They’ve been together for ages. Super lowkey about it, though. You know how Seungkwan is.”
The silence was deafening.
“Seungkwan,” Ayoung echoed, her expression twisting into disbelief. “Boo Seungkwan. As in, ‘my parking spot is sacred ground’ Seungkwan?”
Seokmin’s grin tightened. “The very same.”
For a moment, the two women exchanged a look, processing this unexpected development. Then, to Seokmin’s immense relief, Aera shrugged. “Huh. I guess that makes sense. They’re both kind of…intense.”
“I mean, they fight like an old married couple,” Ayoung had added, smirking.
“Exactly!” Seokmin said, clinging to the lifeline they’ve unknowingly thrown him. “Soulmates, right?”
The rumor spread faster than an office email about free donuts, and by lunchtime, it seemed like everyone had an opinion about your supposed relationship with Boo Seungkwan. The first domino fell when Mingyu slid into the seat across from Seungkwan in the cafeteria, tray in hand and a knowing smirk plastered across his face. He casually tossed his napkin onto his lap, but there was a glint in his eyes that made Seungkwan pause mid-bite.
“So,” Mingyu began, spearing a piece of chicken with far too much casual flair, “you and Y/N, huh? Cute.”
Seungkwan, who had been halfway through chewing a mouthful of rice, immediately choked so violently he nearly toppled the entire tray. The force of his cough was so dramatic that Joshua, seated a few spots away, paused mid-bite and gave Seungkwan a couple of hard thumps on the back, muttering a half-hearted “Jesus, dude” under his breath. The rest of the table fell silent, watching the spectacle unfold with varying degrees of concern and mild amusement.
“Excuse me?” Seungkwan sputtered, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, eyes wide with a mixture of horror and confusion.
“You know…” Mingyu leaned in, lowering his voice conspiratorially, the way someone would when revealing state secrets. “You. Y/N. The whole undercover thing.” He paused for effect, looking around as if making sure no one else was eavesdropping. “Honestly, I didn’t see it coming, but it makes sense. You two do bicker like an old couple. It’s kinda cute, actually.”
Seungkwan froze mid-chew, his chopsticks hovering in midair, as his brain scrambled to process Mingyu’s words. Undercover thing? Old couple? Y/N?
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Seungkwan said flatly, his voice a mix of exasperation and genuine confusion, although a tiny bead of sweat had already begun to form at his temple. He glanced around, noticing the way a few of his coworkers at the nearby tables were suddenly pretending to be deeply invested in their food, but the side glances they were stealing were hard to miss.
Mingyu squinted, his expression becoming exaggeratedly serious. “Don’t play dumb, Seungkwan. Aera and Ayoung said you and Y/N have been secretly dating for ages. Ages. Like, seriously. You two are practically the office power couple.”
Seungkwan stared at Mingyu, not entirely sure whether he should laugh or start hyperventilating. His eyes flickered to Joshua, who was now giving him a sympathetic glance, and then back to Mingyu, whose grin had only grown wider with every passing second. The conversation around them had slowly started to fade into the background, leaving only the sound of Seungkwan’s rapidly beating heart in his ears.
For a brief moment, the only sound was the clatter of utensils against trays, and the faint sound of someone sneezing a few tables over, as though the entire room was collectively holding its breath. Then, with the force of a dam breaking, Seungkwan exclaimed, “WHAT?!”
The sound was so loud and high-pitched that the people around them flinched. Mingyu’s smirk only deepened.
“Yeah, you heard me,” he said, as if the news was the most normal thing in the world. “You and Y/N—together. Lowkey, sure, but people are noticing. Honestly, I'm impressed. You've got good chemistry. You bicker, you glare at each other like it's a sport, and boom—no one can resist you two.”
Seungkwan’s eyes widened even further, if that was possible. His mouth opened and closed, but no words came out for a solid five seconds. “You... Mingyu, this is—this is insane. We’re not—”
“I mean, you guys do fight like an old married couple,” Mingyu added, completely unbothered. “Classic relationship stuff.”
Seungkwan let out a high-pitched groan, dropping his chopsticks onto his tray as he slumped back in his seat. Joshua patted him on the back with a sympathetic look. “Honestly, man, at this point, I think everyone’s already betting on how long you two last.”
Seungkwan turned a death glare on Mingyu. “Mingyu, I am not dating Y/N, okay? Not. I don’t even—”
“Sure you’re not,” Mingyu said with a wink, leaning back and taking a leisurely sip of his drink. “But hey, if you need help smoothing it over, let me know. I could use a good laugh.”
Meanwhile, you were in the middle of a relatively peaceful afternoon, lost in your work, when Soonyoung burst into your workspace like a caffeinated golden retriever on a sugar rush.
“Congrats!” he announced, voice loud enough to startle the intern two desks down, who nearly spilled her coffee in the process.
You blinked at him, genuinely perplexed. “For what?” you asked, narrowing your eyes at him, unsure whether this was a prank you weren’t in on yet.
“For the relationship of the century, duh!” Soonyoung said, plopping into the chair next to you like he owned the place. He threw his feet up onto the corner of your desk, barely missing the pile of reports you’d been working on. He propped his chin on his hands, eyes sparkling with mischief. “You and Seungkwan—genius. Absolutely genius. I mean, I was wondering when you two would finally make it official, but keeping it lowkey? Perfect. Who came up with it? Was it you? It had to be you.”
Your face contorted into a mix of confusion and horror, the words barely registering. “What are you talking about? What relationship?”
Soonyoung leaned in closer, like he was about to share some highly classified info, lowering his voice to a dramatic whisper. “The PR stunt, obviously! Aera and Ayoung are eating it up. Honestly, you and Seungkwan should start charging them rent for all the space you’re taking up in their heads. They're obsessed. It’s amazing.” He gave a pleased little clap. “Love to see it.”
“PR stunt?” you echoed, voice climbing in pitch. “Seungkwan?”
“Don’t be shy!” Soonyoung winked, his eyes practically glittering with pride. “You’re playing it so cool. I gotta hand it to you, you two are perfect at the whole ‘undercover couple’ thing. No one saw it coming. Now, with all those entertainment rumors about you two, people are talking. It’s the kind of buzz I can only dream of.”
You slammed your laptop shut with a dramatic bang. The sound made Soonyoung jump. "I’m going to kill him."
Soonyoung, unfazed, simply leaned back in his chair with a grin. “You should. But first, enjoy the chaos, because it’s already spreading. I mean, even the office Slack is buzzing about your ‘relationship.’ I think it’s time for you to play the long game.”
Before you could respond, Soonyoung was already pulling out his phone and swiping through a group chat on his screen. You could feel your headache forming as he muttered something about “setting the record straight” and “beating Mingyu’s office poll on couple dynamics."
Seokmin was mid-sip of his third coffee of the day when the breakroom door slammed open with enough force to make him spill.
“What the—” Seokmin started, dabbing at the mess with a crumpled napkin, but he didn’t get to finish because you and Seungkwan stormed in, practically radiating wrath. It was like watching a SWAT team execute a mission—except the target was him and his questionable life choices.
“You!” Your voice cracked through the air like a whip as you jabbed an accusatory finger in his direction.
“YOU!” Seungkwan echoed, his tone sharp enough to cut glass. His finger joined yours in solidarity, a united front of pure fury.
Seokmin froze, cornered between the sink and the vending machine, his coffee mug clutched like a makeshift shield. “Me?” he squeaked, his eyes darting between your expressions, both etched with a mix of betrayal and irritation.
“Yes, you!” Seungkwan snapped, stepping closer with the air of a man who had reached the end of his rope. “Do you want to explain why Mingyu just asked me if me and Y/N are naming our future pets after luxury brands?!”
The words hung in the air for a beat, heavy with absurdity.
“Luxury brands?” you echoed, your tone disbelieving.
“That’s not the point!” Seungkwan said, throwing his hands up in exasperation. He rounded back on Seokmin, who looked like a deer caught in a pair of particularly unforgiving headlights. “Explain. Now.”
Seokmin hesitated, his mind spinning like a faulty gear. He could feel a bead of sweat forming at his temple. “Okay,” he began carefully, stalling for time. “First of all, you’re welcome.”
The sheer audacity of the statement hit like a slap.
“You’re welcome?” you and Seungkwan chorused, voices dripping with incredulity.
“Yes!” Seokmin said, puffing up his chest slightly as though he were presenting a brilliant thesis. “You don’t understand how horrible Aera and Ayoung were being. They were saying awful things about you, Y/N! I had to defend your honor.”
“And your solution,” you said, your tone calm but with an edge sharp enough to slice through steel, “was to fake-date me with Seungkwan?”
“Yeah, Seokmin,” Seungkwan added, his hands flailing in emphasis. “I mean, if you wanted to fake-date Y/N, at least pick someone plausible. Like, I don’t know, Mingyu.”
“Hey!” you snapped, your glare whipping to Seungkwan.
“What?” Seungkwan asked, blinking in genuine confusion. “It was just an example.”
“Enough!” Seokmin groaned dramatically, throwing his hands in the air as though burdened by your collective lack of vision. “Look, it worked, didn’t it? Aera and Ayoung bought it! They even said you two bicker like an old married couple!”
“That’s not a compliment!” Seungkwan exclaimed, his voice rising an octave.
“And,” you interjected, stepping forward, your expression unnervingly calm but your tone laced with menace, “now the entire office thinks we’re in a relationship. So, how exactly does this ‘plan’ of yours end?”
Seokmin’s grin faltered slightly, his bravado cracking just enough to reveal a hint of unease. “Uh… with you two faking it for a bit longer? You know, until Aera and Ayoung find someone else to gossip about?”
Seungkwan let out a groan, dragging a hand through his hair in frustration. “You are unbelievable.”
“And you’re fired from planning anything ever again,” you added, your voice dripping with finality.
Seokmin opened his mouth to respond, his face twisting into a defensive expression, but the door creaked open before he could speak.
All three of you turned to see Soonyoung poking his head inside, his phone clutched in one hand. “Hey, not to interrupt, but I just posted a poll in the office group chat: ‘Who’s the power couple—Seungkwan and Y/N or Soonyoung and his plants?’ You’re winning by 72 percent, by the way.”
The room fell into stunned silence.
“You’re all insane,” Seungkwan muttered at last, snatching his coffee off the counter and storming out in a whirlwind of righteous indignation.
“Seokmin,” you said through gritted teeth, each syllable dripping with warning. “Fix this.”
Seokmin raised his mug in a mock toast, his grin resurfacing. “Don’t worry. I’ve got a plan.”
“Oh, no,” you groaned, turning on your heel. “We’re doomed.”
Seokmin’s apartment is as much of a disaster as you’d expect for a man who owns a single fork and three mismatched plates. The couch is one ill-timed flop away from breaking, and the "decor" consists of a faded movie poster, a dying plant, and a string of half-working fairy lights. Yet, somehow, it’s become the Friday night spot.
You, Seokmin, and occasionally Soonyoung gather here weekly like clockwork, cobbling together meals from his barren fridge, drinking yourselves silly, and venting about work. It’s an unspoken tradition, one that began with a pity invite after a particularly hellish week and quickly solidified when you discovered that, despite his lack of utensils, Seokmin could cook better than half the office put together.
Tonight, however, you’ve barely cracked open a bottle of soju when Seokmin starts talking about your “relationship” with Seungkwan.
“I’m just saying,” he slurs, stirring a pot of ramen with a spatula (his one and only cooking tool), “if you and Seungkwan fake-dated, Aera and Ayoung would shut up. It’s genius!”
You groan, sprawled on the lumpy couch with a glass in hand. “Seokmin, I’d rather die.”
“Would you, though?” he says, squinting at you like he’s cracked the code to life. “Because imagine showing up to the gala with Seungkwan on your arm. They’d hate it. And you’d look hot.”
You swish the remaining soju in your glass, frowning. “I don’t need Seungkwan to look hot.”
“Exactly! Which makes it better. He’d be like your hot accessory. Like a really angry Gucci bag.”
You snort at the thought of Seungkwan as a designer handbag and open your mouth to argue when Seokmin’s expression turns suspiciously earnest. “Look, I’m your work husband. I’d never steer you wrong. Just trust me.”
Your brain, already fuzzed from alcohol and exhaustion, betrays you. “Fine,” you mutter, waving your hand. “Whatever. I’ll fake-date Seungkwan.”
“REALLY?!” Seokmin drops the spatula with a clatter and claps his hands. “Great! Let me tell Soonyoung it’s safe to come in!”
“What?” you snap, sitting up so fast the room tilts. “What do you mean, safe to come in?”
“Yeah,” Seokmin says casually, wiping his hands on his pants. “He’s been waiting outside with Seungkwan for the 45 minutes it took for me to convince you.”
“LEE SEOKMIN, I WILL FUCKING THROTTLE YOU!”
You launch your slipper at him, but he ducks. The projectile sails past him and hits a new target—a very startled Seungkwan, who has just walked through the door.
The slipper connects with his thigh with a muted thwack.
Shocked silence fills the room.
Seungkwan glares at the three of you like you’ve all personally wronged him. “Nope. Nope, nope, nope. I’m going home. All of you motherfuckers are insane.”
“Wait!” Soonyoung and Seokmin leap forward, grabbing Seungkwan by the arms and dragging him back inside. He protests the whole way, muttering about how he “knew this was a terrible idea” and “should’ve stayed home.”
Thus begins the chaos.
Seokmin slaps the paper onto the coffee table like he’s presenting a groundbreaking thesis. In messy, barely legible letters, he’s scrawled FAKE DATING CONTRACT across the top.
“We’re doing this right,” he announces, brandishing the sharpie like a microphone. “Discussion topic number one: PDA.”
“None,” you say, raising your soju bottle in a mock toast.
“No PDA?” Soonyoung protests from where he’s sprawled across the armrest of the couch. “How is that going to convince anyone you’re dating? You can’t just stare at each other awkwardly across the room!”
“I don’t stare at people awkwardly,” you snap.
“Yes, you do,” Seungkwan deadpans. “That’s, like, your whole thing.”
“Excuse me?” you shoot back, glaring.
“Alright, alright!” Seokmin waves the sharpie between you like a referee breaking up a fight. “Compromise: hand-holding is allowed.” He starts writing it down, tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth.
“And cheek kisses,” Soonyoung adds brightly.
“No way!” Seungkwan bursts out, looking betrayed.
“It’s just a cheek!” Soonyoung protests. “You don’t even have to look at her.”
“Wow,” you mutter, rolling your eyes. “Thanks for the enthusiasm, darling.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Seungkwan snaps, arms crossing. “Did you want me to lie and say I’m thrilled to be fake-dating the office menace?”
You grab a couch cushion and smack him over the head with it. “I wouldn’t have to be a menace if you weren’t so insufferable!”
“Guys!” Seokmin groans, pointing the sharpie at both of you like it’s a weapon. “Focus. Cheek kisses are in.” He scribbles it down while Seungkwan mutters something about treason.
“And you,” you add, pointing at Seungkwan, “are bringing me coffee every morning for six weeks from that café across town.”
“Like hell I am!” Seungkwan glares. “You know how far that is?”
“Yes, which is why you’re doing it,” you snap. “Call it emotional compensation.”
“You’re not getting coffee and the parking spot!” Seungkwan shouts, sitting up straight.
“The parking spot was mine first!”
“Your car doesn’t even fit in it properly!”
“Then I’ll make it fit!”
Seokmin scribbles something on the paper and holds it up with an exasperated flourish. “Okay, joint custody of the parking spot. You’ll alternate weeks.”
“That’s stupid,” you mutter.
“So are you!” Seungkwan fires back, and you lunge for another cushion.
“Guys!” Soonyoung yells, snatching the cushion out of your hands. “Rule number three: no throwing things at each other while in public.”
“I’m not signing that,” you say immediately.
“Neither am I,” Seungkwan agrees.
“Fine,” Seokmin grumbles, crossing it out. “Next rule: no kissing on the lips.”
“That should’ve been rule number one,” Seungkwan mutters, and you chuck a slipper at him for good measure.
“Rule number five: you have to act nice to each other in front of Aera and Ayoung,” Seokmin adds, barely pausing as Seungkwan yelps.
“Oh, great,” you say sarcastically. “So now I have to fake-date him and fake-like him?”
“Yeah, real tough,” Seungkwan scoffs. “Try fake-liking you for five minutes.”
“Okay, rule six: no insults while in public,” Seokmin says, scribbling furiously.
“Define ‘insult,’” you say.
“You just called me a moron five minutes ago!” Seungkwan protests.
“That’s not an insult,” you argue. “It’s an observation.”
“Oh my God,” Seokmin groans, pinching the bridge of his nose.
“You’ll both bring snacks to the gala,” Soonyoung interjects, leaning over Seokmin’s shoulder. “That way, when you start arguing in public, at least you can shove food into each other’s mouths.”
“That is not going on the list,” Seungkwan says, shooting him a glare.
“It’s already on there,” Seokmin chirps.
The arguing goes on and on, fueled by soju and petty grievances, until the paper is crammed with hastily written rules, half of which contradict each other. Seokmin holds up the finished product triumphantly.
FAKE DATING CONTRACT(written and notarized by Lee Seokmin, Esq. of Bad Ideas LLC)
No PDA.
Exception: hand-holding is allowed.
Exception to the exception: no clammy hands.
Cheek kisses are mandatory for believability.
Mandatory?! – Seungkwan
Yes. – Soonyoung
No lip kissing, EVER.
We’re not that committed to this.
Joint custody of the parking spot.
Weeks will alternate.
If one party is late to the spot, they forfeit their turn.
Coffee Clause:
Seungkwan will deliver coffee every morning for six weeks.
It must come from the café across town.
Why do I have to do this? – Seungkwan
Because you’re annoying. – Y/N
No throwing objects at each other in public.
Or private! – Seungkwan
Not negotiable. – Y/N
Insult ban in public spaces.
“Moron” is not an insult, it’s an observation.
This feels targeted. – Seungkwan
Be nice to each other in front of Aera and Ayoung.
Smile. A lot. Pretend you’re not arguing.
How am I supposed to do that?! – Y/N
Snacks must be brought to the gala.
If bickering begins, snacks will be used to shut each other up.
This rule is offensive. – Seungkwan
Duration of fake dating: until Aera and Ayoung lose interest or find another victim.
No extensions allowed.
All parties must try to look reasonably attractive during public appearances.
Define ‘reasonably.’– Seungkwan
Just don’t embarrass me. – Y/N
Any disputes regarding this contract will be arbitrated by Soonyoung and Seokmin.
Oh, we’re gonna regret this.
Practice sessions required before the first public appearance.
“Practice” may include hand-holding, smiling, and general fake-couple behavior.
Can we practice not doing this? – Seungkwan
Signed, Y/N & Boo Seungkwan Witnessed by: Lee Seokmin & Kwon Soonyoung
“Done!” he declares. “Time to sign.”
You glance at the chaotic list and groan. “I hate this.”
“Sign it anyway,” Seokmin says, shoving the sharpie into your hand.
You scrawl your name at the bottom with all the enthusiasm of someone signing away their soul. Seungkwan follows suit, muttering curses under his breath.
“Great!” Seokmin beams, snatching the paper and sharpie. “Now, time to practice!”
“Seokmin, it’s 3 AM!” you whine. “Let me go home!”
“NO!” Soonyoung and Seokmin yell in unison.
Practice begins in earnest with Seokmin standing in front of you and Seungkwan like a drill sergeant, clipboard in hand. Soonyoung is sprawled across the couch with a blanket, looking far too comfortable for someone instigating chaos.
“Alright,” Seokmin says, tapping his pen against the clipboard. “First order of business: compliments.”
“Compliments?” you echo, your tone flat. “We’re fake-dating, not auditioning for a rom-com.”
“Yes, compliments,” Seokmin says, with the exaggerated patience of a kindergarten teacher. “If you can’t fake a little affection, no one’s going to buy this. Start with something small. Seungkwan, you go first.”
“Fine,” Seungkwan sighs, turning to you. “Your… outfit is fine.”
“Wow,” you deadpan. “Don’t hold back.”
“Fine! You looked pretty that one day you wore a dress to work,” he says, crossing his arms defensively.
Your stomach flips unexpectedly, and you hate that it does. That wasn’t what you’d expected him to say. The memory surfaces unbidden: you, rushing into the office late for a meeting, fumbling with your presentation slides. You barely noticed Seungkwan staring, too preoccupied with apologizing to the executives that were staring at your whirlwind entrance.
Now, you remember the day too well, and you shove the memories down immediately. “That’s it? One day out of, like, a thousand?” you say, masking your unease with a smirk.
“Take it or leave it,” he snaps.
“Your turn,” Seokmin says, gesturing at you.
You glance at Seungkwan, already regretting what you’re about to say. “You… make people laugh.”
“That’s the best you can do?” Seungkwan scoffs, but there’s a flicker of something softer in his eyes.
“Okay, fine,” you grumble. “You’re good at your job. People like you. You’re… charming, I guess.”
The room goes silent for a beat, and you feel heat creeping up your neck.
“Well,” Seungkwan says after a pause, his voice quieter. “Thanks.”
“Okay, compliments, check,” Seokmin interjects, scribbling something illegible onto the contract for no discernible reason. “Next, hand-holding!”
“Seriously?” you groan.
“Yes!” Soonyoung shouts from his sprawl on the couch. “You’re going to have to do it in public! Get over it!”
Reluctantly, you hold out your hand. Seungkwan looks at it like you’ve just offered him a live grenade.
“Stop stalling,” Seokmin says, smirking.
Seungkwan grabs your hand, and the moment your palms meet, you recoil. “Why is your hand so clammy?” you demand, grimacing.
“Because I’m stressed, you monster!” Seungkwan shoots back. “Stop squeezing so hard!”
“I’m not squeezing—your hand’s just weird!”
“My hand is weird?” Seungkwan huffs. “Yours is dryer than the Sahara!”
“You’re both weird!” Soonyoung yells, throwing a couch pillow at your heads. “Try again, and this time, don’t look like you’re holding hands with a corpse!”
The both of you roll your eyes but try again. This time, it’s… slightly better. Seungkwan’s hand is still clammy, but at least he’s not actively complaining.
By the time Soonyoung pipes up again, the sun is starting to rise, casting pale light through the blinds.
“Alright, final test,” he says, stifling a yawn. “You’ve gotta kiss her cheek.”
“What?!” you and Seungkwan exclaim in unison.
“You’re going to have to do it in public anyway!” Soonyoung argues, gesturing grandly from the couch. “This is practice!”
“I am not kissing—”
“Just do it,” Seokmin says, cutting Seungkwan off with a weary wave of his hand. “The sooner you do, the sooner we can all sleep.”
You open your mouth to argue, but before you can, Seungkwan leans over. His hand finds your shoulder for balance, and then—soft and fleeting—his lips brush your cheek.
It’s over in a heartbeat, but your stomach flips like you’re falling from the top of a roller coaster. You can still feel the warmth of his breath against your skin, the faint pressure of his lips, and it sends a shockwave of emotions crashing through you—confusion, nervousness, and something suspiciously like longing.
Seokmin looks at you knowingly, and your heart stutters in your chest.
“I have to go,” you mutter, grabbing your jacket in a rush. You can’t stay here—not with Seokmin’s knowing smirk, not with Seungkwan’s kiss replaying on a loop in your head. “See you Monday.”
Before anyone can stop you, you’re out the door, the crisp morning air biting at your cheeks as you flee Seokmin’s apartment like it’s on fire.
The parking lot is unusually quiet as you pull in, a sharp contrast to the whirlwind weekend you’re still trying to process. You hadn’t slept much since fleeing Seokmin’s apartment, your thoughts tangled in half-drunken banter, hastily scribbled contracts, and—worst of all—the lingering warmth of Seungkwan’s lips on your cheek.
A glint of sunlight off a familiar car catches your eye, parked a few rows back. Seungkwan’s here early. Of course he is. You can already feel your mood souring, bracing yourself for whatever fresh nonsense he’s decided to stir up this week.
Sliding into The Spot, you glance around, expecting the usual hustle and bustle of the office, but your focus sharpens the moment you spot them—Aera and Ayoung, lingering suspiciously close to your desk. You feel the groan build in your throat. It’s too early for this.
“Look who’s finally here,” Aera says the moment she spots you, her voice carrying easily over the din.
You keep walking, shoulders stiffening as Ayoung chimes in. “Big weekend, huh? Let me guess, late-night dinner dates with you know who?”
“Or maybe a romantic getaway?” Aera adds, giggling. “He seems like the type to splurge, doesn’t he?”
You don’t take the bait, just set your bag down at your desk, pointedly ignoring them.
But they don’t stop. Ayoung leans against the edge of your cubicle, her grin sharp. “Seriously, though. How does it feel? Dating the Boo Seungkwan.”
You glance up at her, exasperation seeping into your voice. “What is your problem?”
“No problem,” she says innocently, her expression anything but. “We’re just... curious. I mean, it’s not every day someone like him ends up with... well, you.”
There it is. The thinly veiled insult. Your fingers tighten around your bag strap, heat rising to your cheeks. Before you can snap back, Aera gasps, her attention snagging on your desk.
“Oh my god. Is that a coffee?” Her tone is mockingly saccharine as she picks up the cup, waving it in front of you. “And a note. ‘As requested - xo Seungkwan.’ How adorable.”
Ayoung practically cackles. “He even knows your order. Wow, this is... honestly shocking.” She isn’t wrong - it’s your exact order, right down to the weirdly specific oat milk ratio you insist on.
“Shocking?” you repeat, glaring.
Aera shrugs, clearly reveling in your discomfort. “I mean, come on. You’re you. He’s... him. It’s a little hard to picture, don’t you think?”
You open your mouth to retort, but a new voice cuts in before you can.
“Do you two ever get tired of this?”
You don’t even need to look to know who it is. You turn just in time to see Seungkwan stride over, exuding confidence like he’s been rehearsing this moment. He doesn’t even look at Aera and Ayoung; his focus is entirely on you as he slides an arm around your waist.
The casual weight of it is jarring, grounding—and completely unnecessary. Your heart stutters in response, though you’d die before admitting it.
“Is there a problem here?” Seungkwan asks, his tone all business, though you catch the faintest flicker of amusement in his eyes.
Aera’s confidence wavers for the first time, her mouth opening and closing as she scrambles for a response. Ayoung, to her credit, looks equally flustered.
“No problem,” Aera says finally, her voice quieter now.
“Good,” Seungkwan replies smoothly. He glances down at you, the faintest smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Enjoy your coffee, babe.”
With that, the two of them retreat, mumbling half-hearted excuses as they shuffle back to their desks.
As soon as they’re gone, Seungkwan drops his arm like it burned him, and the absence of his touch is... startling. Disorienting. You hate how much you notice it.
“What the hell was that?” you hiss, rounding on him.
He doesn’t even look fazed. If anything, he looks amused. “You’re welcome.”
“Welcome? For what? Making things worse?”
He nods toward your desk. “They’re gone, aren’t they?”
You narrow your eyes at him, your frustration mounting. “Why did you even—what is this?” You gesture vaguely to the coffee, the note, the whole absurd situation.
“A contract is a contract,” he says simply, already turning to walk away.
“Wait.” You grab the coffee, pointing it at him like a weapon. “How did you even know my order?”
He pauses, glancing over his shoulder with that infuriating smirk that makes you want to throw the cup at him.
“I have my ways.”
“Seungkwan!” you call after him, but he’s already walking off, the faint echo of his laughter trailing behind him.
You slump into your chair, glaring at the coffee like it’s somehow responsible for all of this. Your phone buzzes, and you pull it out, immediately opening the group chat with Seokmin and Soonyoung.
Y/N: which one of you mfs told seungkwan my coffee order [NOT] tiger: 👀 [NOT] tiger: not it seok: pinky swear not me seok: hm seok: didn’t think he’d actually get you coffee Y/N: how the hell does he know? [NOT] tiger: maybe he just [NOT] tiger: knows[NOT] tiger: soulmate fr Y/N: blocking you. seok: wait seok: did he get it right? Y/N: YES Y/N: that’s the problem!!! seok: hmm [NOT] tiger: HMMMMM
You toss your phone onto your desk, groaning into your hands. Mondays were supposed to be bad, but this? This was a new level of torment. And somewhere in the back of your mind, you can’t stop replaying the warmth of Seungkwan’s hand on your waist—and the way, just for a moment, it didn’t feel so bad.
Tuesday morning. You arrive at your desk to the familiar sight of a coffee waiting for you, the cup steaming invitingly as though it’s supposed to make you feel better about the day ahead. As you drop your bag onto the desk and take in the sight of it, your stomach tightens—because this time, Seungkwan’s waiting for you. Standing there like a kid in a candy store, a smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth as if he knows exactly how to mess with your head.
But today is not the day.
Not after this morning.
You don’t know if it's the car breaking down in the middle of a torrential downpour, or if it’s the fact that your landlord decided today was the day to demand rent five days early and threaten eviction over the tiniest of issues—either way, you’re running on fumes and patience.
When Seungkwan opens his mouth to speak, you don’t even look up. You take a long, slow breath and mutter, “Not today.”
You don’t hear him move at first, and for a moment, you almost think he’s going to leave it. That maybe, just maybe, he’s finally catching on that not every moment is for him. But then, his voice—sharp, defensive—cuts through the air.
“What’s your problem today? I get it, you’re having a bad morning. But I’m trying to be nice here.”
You can’t help it; the words spill out before you can stop them. “I don’t need your pity coffee, Seungkwan. I don’t need your help.”
His eyes flash, the usual teasing glint replaced with something more serious. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
You don’t answer, just fold your arms over your chest, staring hard at the computer screen, trying to block him out. “Just…go away, Seungkwan.”
His eyes widen, and something flickers behind them—hurt, maybe? But before he can say anything else, you hear the unmistakable sound of someone clearing their throat. You look up, realizing you’ve attracted a small crowd.
Aera and Ayoung are standing a few desks away, watching you two with wide, curious eyes. They’ve been lurking long enough to catch the exchange, and you can practically feel their glee radiating off them.
“Everything okay, [Y/N]?” Aera asks, barely hiding her amusement.
Your stomach sinks. You know exactly what they’re thinking: public fight, public gossip. You know you’re not supposed to care, but you do. You absolutely do.
Seungkwan must’ve seen it, too, because in a flash, he’s grabbed your hand—your hand, like it’s the most natural thing in the world—and yanks you toward the breakroom. You stumble slightly in the direction he pulls you, not expecting the sudden contact. Your heart races, and for a split second, you wonder if this was what it felt like before. That warm feeling flooding your chest, the butterflies in your stomach.
But then the door to the breakroom slams shut, cutting off the noise of the office, and Seungkwan lets go of your hand.
He crosses his arms over his chest and leans against the counter, eyes narrowed. “Spill. What’s going on?”
You can’t hold it in anymore. The tension cracks, and before you know it, the tears are spilling out.
“I’m just so tired of everything,” you choke out, the words tangled in the rush of emotions. “My car is broken down, my landlord’s being a total jerk, and everything’s just—ugh. It’s just too much.”
You blink, feeling embarrassed, but Seungkwan doesn’t make fun of you. Instead, his gaze softens for a moment, just enough that you almost don’t believe it. Almost.
“Good,” he says suddenly, and your heart stutters. “You broke the contract.”
You lift your head, confusion wrinkling your brow. “What?”
“The contract.” He says it as though it’s obvious. “You snapped at me in front of Aera and Ayoung. That’s my parking spot for the rest of the week.”
You stare at him, blinking in disbelief. And then, before you can stop it, a laugh escapes from your lips—soft, genuine, and so not what you expected.
“Seriously?” you ask, trying to wipe away the tears that suddenly make you feel so small.
His face softens, just for a moment, before that look fades as quickly as it came. But for a brief second, you could’ve sworn he looked... endearing?
“Don’t laugh,” he mutters, crossing his arms again, leaning back against the counter. “I have principles.”
You can’t help but smile at that, and for the first time today, you feel lighter. You can’t quite place the warm sensation in your chest, but it’s there, flickering like the embers of something you don’t want to acknowledge.
“Hey,” he says with a half-grin, “a contract’s a contract.”
And then, without another word, he turns and walks out, leaving you standing there in the breakroom, a little lighter than before.
When you return to your desk, you’re not sure what you expected. Maybe you thought Aera and Ayoung would leave you alone, but no. Of course not. They’re standing by your cubicle, eyes glued to you, ready to pounce.
“Oh, look who’s back,” Aera says, feigning sweetness. “Everything okay? You two seemed like you were having quite a heated conversation.”
Ayoung raises an eyebrow, almost mockingly. “Yeah, what was that? We didn’t expect Seungkwan to be so... protective.”
You stiffen, but before you can say anything, Seungkwan strolls in casually, all too aware of their prying eyes. He throws a casual arm around your shoulder and leans in, his lips brushing your ear as he speaks in a teasing tone.
“A lover’s spat,” he says smoothly, looking at Aera and Ayoung with a shit-eating grin. “Nothing to see here.”
You freeze for a moment, caught off guard by the sudden closeness of his body. You don’t move, don’t push him off, and you hate how right it feels, even if it’s just for show.
They seem to buy it, nodding and turning away, though you know the gossip mill will be churning with this new twist.
The rest of the day passes by in a blur, and when the lunch hour arrives, Seungkwan casually approaches your table, offering in his usual nonchalant manner, “I’ll drive you home today.”
The casualness of it almost makes you choke on your lunch. Seokmin, who had just taken a sip of his drink, immediately spits it out in Soonyoung’s face. You can’t help but laugh, but when Seungkwan shoots you a look, you quickly compose yourself.
“I’m fine,” you tell him, voice calm but firm. “Seokmin already agreed to jump my car and drive me home.”
Seungkwan shrugs, but there’s a knowing look in his eyes. “Whatever you say, babe.”
Later that evening, as you’re in the car with Seokmin, he turns to you, his gaze intense. “What’s going on with you and Seungkwan?” he asks, his voice uncharacteristically serious.
You deflect, shrugging it off with a nonchalant tone. “Nothing. We’re just...” You trail off, unsure of how to explain it.
Seokmin doesn’t let up, his gaze never leaving you the entire drive home.
When you get home, you’re still thinking about Seungkwan—about his hand in yours, the warmth that flickered in his eyes when you laughed.
Later that night, you get a text from Seungkwan. You roll your eyes as you unlock your phone.
Later that night, you get a text from Seungkwan. You roll your eyes as you unlock your phone.
Seungkwan (WORK): what color dress are you wearing to the gala?
Y/N: why
Seungkwan (WORK): because it’s in two days idiot Y/N: ok and Seungkwan (WORK): what kind of boyfriend doesn’t match ties to his girlfriend’s dress
You pause for a moment, then text back,
Y/N: midnight blue
There’s a long pause before he replies.
Seungkwan (WORK): we’re gonna aera and ayoung the fuck up Seungkwan (WORK): you’re welcome.
You snort, rolling your eyes, but something in the back of your mind feels a little lighter. You look at the screen again, trying to push away the warmth that’s creeping into your cheeks.
You try to shake off the weird fluttering in your chest, but it’s hard when you can’t stop thinking about the way he smiled at you in the breakroom.
Then, after reading the text one last time, you throw your phone aside and scream into your pillow for a solid 30 seconds.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?” The pillow muffles the sounds of your frustration, embarrassment, and maybe something else all rolling together.
It’s Wednesday, and you’re feeling... strange. So, as a silent apology of sorts, you leave Seungkwan's parking spot open for him, not even pretending it’s not a deliberate move. And to make it worse (or better, depending on how you look at it), you stop by his favorite restaurant—thanks to a very begrudging Mingyu who’d been the one to tell you at 6 AM—and leave a packaged meal on his desk with a simple note: "i’m sorry."
By the time Seungkwan walks in, there’s a triumphant grin on his face and a coffee in hand. You don’t even have to look up to know what’s coming—he’s practically floating from the excitement of seeing his spot waiting for him.
As you stand to meet him, your fingers brush ever so gently when he hands you your order. It’s the smallest of touches, but for some reason, your pulse quickens.
"Thank you for the food," he says, his voice sounding strange—almost sincere, which isn’t like him at all. "But how did you know my favorite restaurant?"
You can’t help the smirk that stretches across your face.
"I have my ways," you reply, leaning in just a little, your voice cool and teasing as you echo his words back from Monday. The playfulness between the two of you feels oddly familiar, and for a moment, there’s something in his eyes—just a flicker—that catches you off guard. But you shove it down before it can fully register.
Seungkwan arches an eyebrow, lips curling into that mischievous smile of his, but before he can say anything, you already know what comes next: more teasing, more playful bickering. It’s almost comfortable, like this entire fake-dating charade is starting to blur the line between what’s real and what’s not.
But the strangest thing of all is the way your heart is beating a little faster than it should.
You don’t know why you’re bothered. You can’t even really pinpoint the reason why, but when you walk past Seungkwan’s desk and see him sitting there, earbuds in, his face subtly twitching in response to a few of your colleagues’ whispers, something inside you snaps. It’s not your usual reaction to the gossip at work—it’s the way he seems oblivious to the hurt he's trying to hide, like he’s expecting it. Your mind races as you overhear them, the words sticking to you like bitter honey:
“Seungkwan’s just a joke with the dating thing. You can tell he’s not even on the same level as her,” Kevin’s voice rings out, “I mean, she’s crushing it, and look at him. He’s just... there.”
“He’s lucky she even pays attention to him,” Juyeon adds with a snide laugh.
And that’s when your heart clenches, the sound of their voices mixing with the hurt look in Seungkwan’s eyes as he watches the screen, his posture slumping in a way that you’ve seen too many times to ignore.
You tell yourself you don’t care.
But you do.
And before you can stop yourself, you march toward his desk. Your palms are sweaty, but your resolve is steady, and when you reach his side, you throw your arms around him from behind, your body leaning into his warmth, your chin resting on his shoulder as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. You’re telling yourself it’s all just an act. Just a game. Fake dating, after all, is supposed to be easy.
But the feeling of his body stiffening under your arms, his breath catching, makes your stomach flip in a way you didn’t expect. You force yourself to smile, to say the words like they don’t matter.
"Hey love," you murmur, pressing a brief kiss to his cheek that feels far too real for what it is, "wanna get lunch?"
For a moment, Seungkwan just stares at you, dumbfounded. His eyes search yours as if trying to figure out whether this is part of the act or something more. You don’t give him a chance to answer. Instead, you interlace your fingers with his, pulling him to his feet and out of the seat, dragging him to the cafeteria without another word.
The air between you feels thick, but somehow, it doesn’t matter. You keep your grip on his hand as if it’s the only thing tethering you to reality. When you reach the lunch line, Seungkwan mumbles under his breath, his voice low but filled with something you can’t quite place.
“Thank you,” he says, and the words feel heavy, like they mean something far more profound than you expected.
You glance at him, trying to keep your face neutral. "Why do you put up with all this?" you ask, hoping to keep the conversation casual. But the question feels more vulnerable than you’d like.
He shrugs nonchalantly, though his gaze drops to the ground as he talks. "Come on, I get worse from you. I can handle a little shit talk from people who don’t know what they’re talking about.”
But something in his voice, something sharp and tired, makes your heart sink. The idea that you’ve made him feel like he’s “just there” rattles you. That you’ve unknowingly added to his burdens—because in this moment, it feels like you are the reason he’s doubting himself.
“Seungkwan, I didn’t mean—” you begin, but he cuts you off with a small, almost bitter smile.
"It’s fine," he murmurs, but there’s a flicker of something unsaid in his expression.
The rest of lunch is quieter than usual, and you both keep stealing glances at each other, unsure of what to say or how to fix the awkward tension that now lingers between you. When the two of you return to your desks, you half-expect him to brush it off and act like nothing happened, but instead, Seungkwan shows up at your desk after lunch, and for a moment, you think maybe he’s just here to grab something he left behind. But when he looks at you, his gaze softens.
"I’m sorry,” he says, looking almost... shy? “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad about the way I said that. I know you don’t... mean to be like that."
You swallow hard, feeling your heart twist, guilt and frustration building in your chest. “No, I... I shouldn’t have said anything either. I’m sorry, Seungkwan."
His eyes flicker, like he’s trying to read you, but then he cracks a smile. "Maybe we both just suck at this fake-dating thing."
It’s a lame attempt at humor, but it works. The tension lifts slightly, though the understanding between you two is still fragile. You force a chuckle, then give him a genuine, if a little uneasy, smile.
And just like that, the awkwardness starts to dissipate.
For now, anyway.
Thursday starts off strangely, though you try not to dwell on it. When you pull into the parking lot, The Spot is open for the first time in weeks. It takes you a second to process the empty space, the absence of Seungkwan's familiar car parked a few rows back.
The sight feels...off.
Your first thought is that maybe he’s running late, but a quick glance at the clock tells you that’s impossible. Seungkwan is never late. Your second thought—that maybe he’s working from home—is more logical, but it doesn’t explain the odd pang of disappointment settling in your chest.
It’s fine. Better, even. You’re busy enough today that you don’t need to see his smug smile or deal with the inevitable teasing that comes with it. Besides, tonight is the gala. He’ll show up there, looking sharp and polished, and you’ll do what you’ve been doing for weeks: play the part.
So why does the thought of not seeing him today feel heavier than it should?
You brush it off as you head into the building, but the feeling lingers. Your desk is bare when you get there—no coffee, no scrawled Post-it, no familiar, cocky energy waiting for you to roll your eyes at. You should feel relief.
Instead, it throws your whole morning off.
By the time you find yourself in the breakroom around noon, your nerves feel frayed. Deadlines loom over your head, your inbox is exploding, and now Soonyoung and Seokmin are leaning against the counter, watching you like hawks with identical grins.
“Excited for tonight?” Seokmin asks, his voice far too cheerful as he tears into a granola bar.
You glance at him, eyebrows raised. “What do you think?”
“I think,” Soonyoung interrupts before Seokmin can respond, “that you’ve been pretending not to care, but you’re actually super nervous about walking into that gala with Seungkwan.”
“I’m not nervous,” you snap, reaching for the coffee pot.
“Sure,” Seokmin says, his tone dripping with skepticism. “You’re totally calm. That’s why you’ve been fidgeting with your bracelet for the past five minutes.”
Your hand freezes, and you glance down to see your fingers toying absently with the charm on your bracelet. With a muttered curse, you reach for a mug instead, but the damage is already done.
Soonyoung smirks. “Uh-huh. Definitely not nervous.”
“I’m not,” you insist, pouring your coffee with more force than necessary.
“Then what’s with the bracelet?” Seokmin presses, grinning like he knows he’s got you cornered.
You glare at him over your shoulder. “Maybe I just like the bracelet, Seokmin. Ever think of that?”
“Or maybe,” Soonyoung drawls, dragging the words out obnoxiously, “you’re thinking about what it’s gonna be like to walk into that ballroom tonight on Seungkwan’s arm.”
Your hand twitches, spilling coffee onto the counter.
“Oh my god,” you groan, grabbing a napkin and swiping at the mess.
Soonyoung clutches his chest dramatically. “You didn’t deny it.”
“There’s nothing to deny!”
Seokmin snickers. “You’re deflecting.”
“I’m ignoring you,” you correct, tossing the soaked napkin into the trash.
“You can’t ignore the truth!” Soonyoung declares, his grin practically splitting his face. “Which is that you’re gonna show up tonight in a dress that perfectly matches Seungkwan’s tie and pretend it’s all part of the act while secretly—”
“Soonyoung,” you interrupt sharply, narrowing your eyes.
“—you’re freaking out inside about how good he’s gonna look and how everyone’s gonna think you’re in love.”
“Why are you like this?” you demand, though the question is more rhetorical than anything.
“Because it’s fun,” Seokmin answers, popping the last bite of his granola bar into his mouth. “And because you’re so easy to tease when it comes to Seungkwan.”
You open your mouth to retort, but the words die on your tongue because the worst part—the absolute worst part—is that they’re not entirely wrong.
There is a part of you that’s been overthinking the gala all morning. Not because you’re nervous about the event itself, but because you’re nervous about him. About standing next to him in front of your colleagues. About the way he might look at you or the way his hand might rest on your back.
And more than that, you’re nervous about the way you’ll feel when it happens.
It’s a ridiculous thought. Seungkwan is your coworker. Your fake boyfriend. This whole thing is a game, a ploy to one-up Aera and Ayoung and win a stupid bet.
So why does the idea of walking into that ballroom with him make your heart race?
Why does it feel like it’s so much more than a game?
The rest of the day drags, your thoughts drifting back to the gala at every lull in the chaos of work. The deadlines on your desk pile higher, emails flood in, and the occasional, overly cheerful colleague stops by to remind you how "exciting" tonight is going to be.
But despite the busy afternoon, a strange mix of nervous energy and anticipation hums beneath it all. It’s not just about the event—the polished speeches, the endless string of handshakes, the clinking of champagne glasses. No, it’s about Seungkwan. About the act you’re supposed to put on together.
The hours pass in a blur of half-checked boxes and unfinished tasks. By the time you leave the office, you’re still not sure if you’ve made peace with the fact that you’re about to spend the evening glued to his side, pretending to be something you’re not.
You have just enough time to run home, change into your dress, and try to will away the nerves that have been simmering since this morning. Standing in front of your mirror, you adjust the midnight-blue fabric, smoothing it over your hips and fiddling with the clasp on your bracelet.
It’s just a gala, you tell yourself, reaching for your earrings. Just a few hours of small talk and pretending. You’ve done harder things.
But even as you head out the door, slipping into the backseat of the rideshare that will take you to the venue, you can’t quite shake the nagging thought in the back of your mind:
What if tonight doesn’t feel like pretending at all?
You spot Seungkwan waiting near the entrance to the ballroom, standing under the warm glow of the overhead sconces. He’s turned slightly away, scrolling idly on his phone, but it doesn’t take long for him to notice you. The moment his eyes land on you, they widen, the barest flicker of surprise crossing his face before he schools it into something more composed—almost indifferent.
Despite the tension simmering between you lately, you can’t help but take him in. The tailored fit of his suit accentuates his broad shoulders and sharp lines, and the midnight-blue tie—perfectly matched to your dress. The soft lighting catches on the neatly styled strands of his hair, and there’s a certain glow about him tonight that makes your heart stumble, just a little.
Focus, you scold yourself. It’s just Seungkwan. The guy who stole your parking spot. The guy who bickers with you more often than not. This is just one night, and then it’s over. Your hands smooth over the silk of your dress as you approach, brushing at imaginary lint to keep them from trembling.
Seungkwan, however, makes no attempt to disguise his once-over. His eyes drag down your figure with slow, deliberate appraisal before returning to meet your gaze. The faintest hint of a smirk twitches at the corner of his mouth, but you notice the way his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows.
“What?” you ask, crossing your arms and raising a brow.
“Nothing,” he replies too quickly, glancing away. But his ears are tinged red, and when you prod again, leaning in just slightly to make him squirm, he mutters under his breath, “You clean up nice.”
For a second, you’re too stunned to respond. The casual compliment feels out of character, as if it slipped out before he could stop himself.
“And here I thought you’d be grumpy all night,” you say, masking your unease with an easy tease.
“Don’t get used to it,” he shoots back, though there’s no real bite to his tone. With a quiet sigh, he offers you his arm, holding it out stiffly as though unsure of himself.
Your breath catches for just a moment before you loop your arm through his, hoping he doesn’t notice the slight tremble in your fingers. The fabric of his suit is smooth and cool against your skin, and he adjusts his grip just slightly, settling his hand more securely over yours.
“Let’s get this over with,” you mumble, though you can’t bring yourself to meet his gaze.
“Right,” he agrees softly, leading you toward the grand doors. The quiet confidence in his step only makes your own nerves worse, and you wonder—just for a fleeting moment—if he feels it too.
The hotel’s ballroom is a picture of opulence, every detail polished to perfection. Warm golden light spills from the glittering chandeliers above, catching on the beveled edges of crystal glasses and the smooth, glossy surface of the checkered marble floor. White-draped tables line the room, adorned with centerpieces of fresh flowers and flickering candles. A string quartet plays softly in the corner, their music weaving through the gentle hum of conversation.
You barely have a chance to take it all in before the heat of Seungkwan’s arm against yours pulls your focus back. He stands tall beside you, his midnight-blue tie gleaming under the lights. You try not to fidget, but every time your gaze flickers to him, the quiet confidence in his expression sets your nerves on edge.
It’s just one night, you remind yourself, willing your feet to move forward. One night, and then it’s over.
The crowd shifts as you both step into the room, and you catch Aera and Ayoung’s gazes almost immediately. They’re standing near the champagne table, flutes in hand, their heads inclined toward each other in hushed conversation. The moment they spot you, their eyes widen, gliding from you to Seungkwan, then back again. Aera’s expression twists into something sharp and incredulous, while Ayoung’s lips curve into a smug smirk.
“Looks like we’re already the talk of the town,” Seungkwan murmurs, leaning slightly toward you. His breath brushes your ear, sending a shiver down your spine that you chalk up to irritation.
“Good,” you manage to say, lifting your chin. “Let’s give them something to really talk about.”
You’re not sure where the confidence comes from, but it carries you forward, your heels clicking against the marble as you walk with Seungkwan through the crowd. You can feel Aera’s glare burning into your back, but you keep your head high, your grip on Seungkwan’s arm tightening just slightly.
From across the room, you hear it before you see them—peals of laughter that could only belong to Seokmin and Soonyoung. You glance in their direction and find them stationed at one of the tables, grinning like giddy schoolchildren as they nudge each other and whisper conspiratorially. Seokmin pretends to hide his face behind his hand, but his eyes gleam with amusement, while Soonyoung practically bounces in his chair, barely able to contain his excitement.
“Subtle,” you mutter under your breath, though you can’t help the way your lips twitch upward.
Seungkwan notices too, his eyes narrowing slightly. “They’re enjoying this way too much.”
“Can you blame them?” you ask, finally letting a wry smile slip through. “We’re a spectacle.”
He huffs a laugh, shaking his head, but when you glance up at him, there’s a softness in his gaze that wasn’t there before. You quickly look away, pretending to adjust the bracelet on your wrist.
As you move further into the ballroom, you catch snippets of conversations trailing off, eyes lingering just a second too long on you and Seungkwan. The tension in the room feels palpable, but Seungkwan doesn’t falter. He keeps his pace steady, his arm firm and reassuring beneath your touch.
And for a brief moment, as you glide through the glittering sea of people, you almost forget that this is all an act.
The ballroom is a haze of chandeliers, polished floors, and conversations that hum like a soft undercurrent beneath the music. You move through it all hyperaware of Seungkwan at your side, the faintest brush of his presence grounding and unsteadying you all at once.
He’s good at this, you realize. At shaking hands, sharing effortless smiles, and exchanging pleasantries that seem to charm everyone in his orbit. You try to focus on your own small talk, but it’s nearly impossible not to notice the way his hand occasionally drifts to the small of your back, guiding you subtly through the crowd. It’s light—barely there—but every time his palm presses gently against you, warmth blooms, spreading like ripples in a still pond.
You try not to overthink it. It’s probably all for show, you tell yourself. Just part of the act.
Except…why does he keep glancing at you? After every joke he tosses into the conversation, his eyes flit to yours, watching for your reaction. When you laugh, his smile softens, almost imperceptibly, and when you don’t, his brow furrows for the briefest moment before he’s cracking another.
“Can we help you?” you mutter when Seokmin and Soonyoung sidle up to you for the third time that evening, their grins almost too wide.
“Nope,” Soonyoung says, popping the ‘p’ with dramatic flair.
“We’re just here for the show,” Seokmin adds, barely holding back his snicker.
“Go away,” you hiss, stepping closer to Seungkwan as if that will somehow shield you from their relentless teasing.
Instead of leaving, they both wiggle their eyebrows at you, making exaggerated faces every time you shift a little closer to him—whether intentionally or not. At one point, Seokmin mimes taking a picture with his imaginary camera, pretending to swoon like a tabloid photographer.
“Do you need something?” Seungkwan asks dryly, not even sparing them a glance as he sips his champagne.
“Just enjoying the chemistry,” Soonyoung says, grinning.
“I hate both of you,” you say, shoving past them and pulling Seungkwan with you, his laughter trailing behind you as you march toward the buffet table.
As the night wears on, the hyperawareness doesn’t fade. If anything, it grows sharper. You catch yourself leaning into him, just slightly, when he speaks to you. His scent—something warm and clean—lingers in the air, familiar yet distracting. And though you do your best to stay detached, your stomach flips every time he turns to you, his expression softer than you expect.
It’s just one night, you remind yourself. One night, and then it’s over.
But when Seungkwan tilts his head to meet your gaze, a flicker of something unspoken in his eyes, you wonder if he feels it too.
The conversation with the vice president of finance hits like a brick wall. You had hoped for the night to pass without any more uncomfortable moments, but here it is. The older man comes over with a knowing grin, his eyes flicking between you and Seungkwan. His voice is smooth, polished—like he’s done this kind of thing a hundred times before. “Wishing you both all the best,” he says with a wink, his smile stretching into something almost too warm.
Then, as if to solidify the moment, he adds, “I found my wife at work too. It’s always the best kind of relationship, don’t you think?”
Before you can even react, Seungkwan steps in, his hand tightening imperceptibly around your waist, his grip firm, possessive. He plays along with ease, a smile tugging at his lips. “We do make a lovely couple,” he says, the words slipping out with the same smooth confidence he uses to charm everyone around him.
And just like that, your knees almost give out. You swallow the lump in your throat, trying to cling to any sense of composure, but it’s hard. His voice sounds like it’s meant for someone else. You glance up at him, searching for some sign that he’s only pretending, but his eyes are warm, and it makes your stomach churn. This is too much.
The moment lingers, stretching long and painfully until the vice president finally moves on, leaving you standing there with Seungkwan’s hand still resting on your waist. You feel the heat of his touch, the weight of the promise in his words. And yet, something inside you begins to twist, and you can't quite shake the feeling that this isn’t all a game anymore.
When the quartet begins to play a slow, lilting melody, you feel a wave of dread wash over you. Couples start gravitating toward the dance floor, moving in soft, synchronized sways. You think you’re safe until you notice Soonyoung and Seokmin’s scheming grins out of the corner of your eye.
“Oh, no,” you mutter under your breath, but it’s too late.
“You two,” Soonyoung grins, his eyes gleaming with mischief. “Get out there. Show us how it’s done.”
You freeze, the world tilting on its axis for a moment. You don’t want to dance. You don’t know how to dance. And you certainly don’t want to do it with Seungkwan, not like this. But when you glance over at him, you see the faintest edge of a smile on his lips—like he’s enjoying this far too much.
With a few unsubtle nudges and a downright shove from Soonyoung, you find yourself standing under the ballroom lights, facing Seungkwan. He doesn’t even blink, just steps forward and guides your hands to his shoulders as though this is all perfectly normal. His hands settle on your hips, light but steady, and the contact sends a shiver through you.
“You look like you’re going to bolt,” he murmurs, leaning in just enough that only you can hear. “Relax. Aera and Ayoung are still watching.”
You force a smile, more for their benefit than his, and try to focus on the music. But it’s no use. Every part of this feels overwhelming—the way his hands feel solid against you, the way he moves with a calm confidence you didn’t know he had, the way his gaze flickers to your lips for the briefest moment before snapping back up.
The worst part? You’re not sure what’s fake and what isn’t.
You take a shallow breath, your heart racing as the music swells around you, and everything about the night begins to feel too real. Too intense. The way Seungkwan holds you so effortlessly, the way his chest presses against yours, his gaze lingering on you like it means something.
This isn’t just pretend anymore. This isn’t just a game. You feel like you’re drowning in the pretense, in the slow slide of his body against yours, the fake smiles, the promises of weddings that don’t belong to either of you. You don’t know why it feels like this—like a knot is tightening in your chest with every beat of the music, every moment that stretches longer than you can bear.
You can’t breathe.
It’s too much. The weight of it, the weight of him. His hands on your body, on your waist, intertwined with yours. The tension that thrums between you both is too real, and suddenly, you can’t stand it anymore.
You pull back abruptly, the movement so sudden it startles him.
“I need to go,” you blurt, the words tumbling out before you can stop them.
Without waiting for a response, you pull away from him, feeling his grip loosen as you shove past Seokmin and Soonyoung, who both watch you with surprised eyes. You don’t care. You don’t care that they’re probably confused, or that Seungkwan is still standing there on the dancefloor, looking as though he’s been left behind.
You don’t care about anything but getting away, away from him, away from this night that feels too heavy to carry. You push through the crowd, your pulse thundering in your ears, desperate to escape the world Seungkwan has created tonight—one where every smile feels like a lie, and every touch leaves you questioning everything.
Why did it feel like something more? Why does he feel like something more?
The hallway is cold, and the echoes of the ballroom seem a world away as you stand there, breathing in shallow gasps. You don’t know what you expected when you fled—maybe a bit of space to clear your head, a few moments of peace to sort through the mess in your chest. But then Seungkwan appears, footsteps rapid and sharp against the marble floor, and you brace yourself for whatever this is.
He stops in front of you, his eyes softening, a look of concern on his face. “You broke the contract,” he says, his voice low but playful. “You’re supposed to act like a couple in front of Aera and Ayoung.”
You should’ve expected it. Of course it’s just a game to him. Of course he doesn’t feel anything real. You press your lips together, the taste of bile rising in your throat. The way his words spill out with that same teasing tone, like it’s no big deal—that’s when it really hits you. None of this matters to him.
Your heart tightens, and you open your mouth to say something, anything, but it feels like the words are stuck in your throat, a knot you can’t untie. The silence stretches between you, thick and suffocating, until you finally spit out, “Fuck you, Seungkwan.”
His expression falters, eyes flashing with something like hurt or maybe frustration, but it doesn’t matter. You just want him to shut up, to stop saying the things that twist in your chest.
“What the hell?” His voice is sharp, defensive. “What’s your problem now? I’m just trying to make sure you’re not freaking out in front of them!”
“No,” you snap, your words slipping out before you can stop them. “I’m freaking out because you keep acting like it’s nothing—like it’s all just a damn game.” You’re pacing now, turning away from him, too afraid to face him. “And it’s not just a game, Seungkwan. But you don’t care. Of course you don’t care.”
Seungkwan’s voice is louder now, rising to match your anger. “Don’t you dare say that—”
“Why shouldn’t I?” you spit, your frustration spilling over. “You’ve been treating me like this whole thing is some kind of joke. Do you think I don’t see it? You think I don’t feel it?”
“You think I’m playing games?!” he practically shouts, his voice breaking through your thoughts. “What do you want me to say, huh? What do you want me to do?”
“I don’t know!” The words burst out in a rush, too loud and too raw. “I don’t know what I want! But I sure as hell don’t want this. Don’t want you acting like I’m nothing but some stupid... some stupid game to win! And—”
Your throat tightens. It’s too much. The pain, the frustration, the confusion. The way your heart keeps aching, wanting something that shouldn’t be there. You can’t breathe right, and suddenly, your eyes sting with tears that you didn’t want to shed.
Before you can stop it, you spin to leave, your chest heaving, your hands trembling. You can’t be here anymore. You can’t do this.
But then, just as you take a step, his hand shoots out, grabbing your wrist gently but firmly.
“Don’t go,” Seungkwan murmurs, his voice softer now, and it’s the quietness of it that makes everything inside you snap.
In an instant, you turn back toward him, your body moving without thinking, driven by something primal, something that burns too hot to ignore. You don't care anymore, not about the rules or the reasons you were running or how much you've lied to yourself. Your lips crash into his, desperate and hungry, a sudden, violent collision of need and want. It’s rough, urgent, a complete collapse of all the control you’ve tried so desperately to hold onto.
His lips are warm, soft at first, but there’s no hesitation after that. It deepens in an instant, and you can feel him pushing you back, pressing you against the cold, hard wall. His body presses into yours, all sharp lines and heat, every inch of him a reminder that you’ve wanted this more than you’re willing to admit. You clutch his tie, your fingers knotting into the fabric, pulling him closer, deeper, like it’s not enough. His hands slide up the wall, bracing himself above your head, as if he needs that support to hold himself together too. But you’re too tangled in this moment, too consumed by the feel of him, the way his lips move against yours, the way his breath catches with every shift of his mouth.
His hands find their way to your body, his fingers grazing your hips, and you shudder, the friction between you both igniting something wild inside you. You kiss him back fiercely, and it feels like everything in the world has narrowed down to this singular moment. You don’t know if this is real or if it’s just your mind tricking you into believing it’s more than it is. But you feel it—how right it feels to be tangled up with him, how everything else outside of this space fades away.
His body presses harder, his chest against yours, his warmth seeping into you, filling the cracks where your control once was. You’re dizzy with the intensity of it, a rush of emotions crashing through you, and the silence between kisses becomes unbearable. Your breath is ragged, your heart pounding in your chest as if it’s trying to escape, to be closer to him. And every time you feel him pull away, even just a little, you’re pulling him back, chasing that connection that’s too elusive to hold.
It feels like the world is spinning too fast, and you’re holding onto him, to this fleeting moment, hoping that maybe it won’t slip away. But it does—it always does.
You press harder into him, your hands trembling as they slide up his shirt, feeling the heat of his skin beneath your fingers. It’s almost too much, like you’re consuming each other, but you can’t stop. You don’t want to stop.
But then the air feels heavier, and the ache in your chest intensifies. This is wrong, it has to be. His mouth against yours, his body holding you so tightly—it’s all too much, and yet you’re still starved for more. You feel like you’re drowning, and yet you don’t know how to pull away, how to breathe again without the taste of him on your lips.
You break the kiss suddenly, gasping for air, your chest rising and falling with desperation, as if the only thing you need in that moment is to breathe and be closer to him. But you know better. You remember. You have to remember.
And just like that, the realization comes crashing down, shattering everything inside you. It’s all just a game for him. It always was. You turn away, stumbling back, your body trembling as you try to steady yourself, your hands shaking uncontrollably.
“No.” You gasp, heart hammering painfully in your chest. You can’t stay here. You can’t let him see how much he’s breaking you right now.
Before he can say anything, before he can try to reach for you, you turn on your heel and run. You don’t look back, even when your chest aches and your throat burns, because you know that if you do, you’ll see something you can’t unsee.
And you’re too afraid that the feeling you’ve just experienced—that feeling of being whole, of being wanted—is the very thing that’ll make you lose yourself completely.
That night, as the doorbell rings, you know exactly who it is before you even get up. You don’t even have the strength to ask them to leave—Seokmin and Soonyoung just know. They always do.
Seokmin's already cracking open a pint of Ben & Jerry's before you've even had the chance to process their arrival, his voice light but knowing, as if they’ve been waiting for the moment to show up at your door. And it’s not long before they’re seated on the couch beside you, Soonyoung's knowing look cutting right through you as he silently opens the second pint, passing it to you without a word.
You don’t have the heart to ask about Seungkwan. You’re terrified of hearing it, terrified of what they’ll say. You don’t want to know if he’s going to shrug it off, or worse, if he’s forgotten about you already.
Instead, you spend the next few hours in silence, the three of you settled into the couch, alternating between the steady flow of ice cream and shitty romcoms on TV. The sound of laughter and melodramatic dialogue fills the space, but you barely hear it. Every now and then, a sob shakes through you, and you absently grab Soonyoung’s suit jacket, wiping your face on it like some pathetic kid trying to hide from the world.
It’s not a game anymore, you think. But your mind keeps circling back, again and again, and your heart clenches painfully.
You find yourself sniffling during a commercial break, and before you know it, your voice cracks as you whisper into Seokmin’s shoulder, your words barely audible through the tears. “It’s not a game anymore,” you whimper, your chest tight with emotion, a hollow ache you can't seem to fill. “Not to me.”
Seokmin pats your head gently, his hand warm and comforting on your hair, and you can feel him press his cheek against your head in an unspoken gesture of reassurance. Soonyoung doesn’t say anything but looks at you sadly from his spot on your lap, his eyes soft with understanding, but he knows better than to push.
But then Seokmin speaks, his voice quiet, so gentle you almost miss it. “Was it ever?” he asks, the question hanging in the air, a quiet truth you didn’t want to acknowledge.
You don’t answer. Because you know the answer. You’ve known it all along, even when you were pretending not to. The truth is louder than the silence between the three of you, but you’re not ready to face it.
And so, instead of answering, you bury your face further into Seokmin’s shoulder, fighting the tears that never seem to stop. The answer is clear, but you can’t find the words to say it.
Friday feels like the weight of the week is catching up with you, every inch of your body refusing to move as you sit at your desk, staring blankly at the screen. You’ve worked from home plenty of times before, but today? Today, it feels different. The silence is too loud, too consuming, and you can't escape it, not even in the safety of your own apartment. Your phone buzzes incessantly in the corner of your desk, each ping making your chest tighten just a little more. You know it’s him. Seungkwan. You know because his name flashes on your screen, and every time, you hesitate before swiping it away, like a coward.
You don’t want to hear it, not today. Not when everything feels so broken.
But when the photo comes in—a simple picture of your coffee order, just sitting there on your desk with nothing but a blank post-it note next to it—you can feel the tears already threatening to break free. The coffee’s steaming, just the way you like it, but the note’s blank, empty. There’s nothing there. Just silence.
It’s too much.
You let out a strangled sob, your hand shaking as you clutch your phone. Your throat tightens as you struggle to breathe, the weight of everything crashing down on you all at once. You curl up at your desk, tears falling in heavy waves as you finally allow yourself to break. The floodgates that you’ve kept tightly shut the past few days burst wide open, and you can’t stop it. Can’t stop the sobs that wrack through you, shaking you to your core.
You’re not ready to face this. Not ready to admit what’s happening inside of you. You just want it to stop. To go back to before everything got complicated. Before you let yourself feel anything for him.
You don't even bother to wipe your tears away, don’t bother trying to pull yourself together. You don’t even go to Seokmin’s tonight for your weekly ritual. The usual distraction, the routine that’s always been your safe space, feels miles away now.
Instead, you pull the blanket tighter around you, the emptiness of the apartment matching the emptiness you feel inside. You bury yourself in it.
And you let the tears come.
The smell of Seokmin’s cooking wafts into the living room as he sets up the kitchen, making his usual chaotic symphony of clattering pans and sizzling ingredients. He’s persistent, like always, so you know there’s no way you’re getting out of this. He’s here to cook, and more importantly, to drag you back from the spiral you’ve fallen into.
You don’t say anything when he hands you the bowl of food. You just sit down at the kitchen table, quietly shoveling the food into your mouth. It tastes good, as always, but it doesn’t reach you. Not the way it should.
The silence stretches between you two as you chew, the clinking of your utensils the only sound in the room. Seokmin isn’t going to let it slide, though. He’s far too persistent to let you wallow in quiet.
“So,” he starts, his voice quiet but pointed, “what happened?”
You don’t answer immediately, and it’s not because you don’t want to—no, it’s because you’re not sure where to start. Do you tell him the truth? That you let your feelings get tangled up in a game, that Seungkwan tricked you into thinking it meant something more than it was?
But when you look up, you meet Seokmin’s eyes, and for some reason, you just... let it spill.
“I kissed him,” you say, voice small. The words feel like a confession you weren’t ready to make.
Seokmin’s brows furrow slightly, but he doesn’t push. He just asks, “But that’s a good thing, right?”
You snort, bitter and frustrated. “Seokmin, it was all just a game to him.”
The words hang there, sharp in the quiet kitchen air. Seokmin pauses, setting his fork down before speaking again. “Did he tell you that?”
You shake your head. “No, but he doesn’t need to. He kept bringing up the contract.”
Seokmin’s eyes narrow in frustration, but there’s a softness in them too. “Y/N…”
“Don’t,” you mutter, the emotion welling up again in your chest. “I’m done. I’m tired of this, Seokmin. It was never real for him, and it’s too real for me now. I can’t keep pretending.”
You can’t even look him in the eye now, your gaze turning to the table as your hands clutch the bowl. Seokmin stays quiet, letting you speak, but you can feel the weight of his disappointment. It doesn’t make you feel better, but at least you’re not holding it all in.
“What are you going to do on Monday? You have to present together.” Seokmin says, his voice light but his eyes serious.
The question hits you like a punch to the gut. You’ve been avoiding thinking about that. Of course, Monday will come, and you’ll have to face Seungkwan again.
“I’ll ignore him,” you reply, voice almost robotic.
Seokmin raises an eyebrow. “Let me repeat: you have to PRESENT. TOGETHER.” He emphasizes the word ‘together,’ and you can feel the weight of it pressing down on you. “Emphasis on TOGETHER.”
You just stare at your food, not knowing what to say. Your heart is heavy, your thoughts racing.
“Seokmin, I’m tired of this,” you whisper, the words barely escaping your lips. “I’m done. Aera and Ayoung can go fuck themselves, but I’m not playing this game anymore.”
Seokmin doesn’t say anything for a while. You hear him sigh, and when you look up, his face is softer. “If you say so.”
You want to argue, to tell him that it’s easier said than done, but instead, you just slump back into your chair, letting the silence fill the space again. He doesn’t push you further, just lets you stew in your emotions, knowing that you’ll need time. You’re not ready to face Monday, not ready to stand side by side with Seungkwan, pretending like none of this ever happened. But there’s no escaping it. And you’ll have to deal with it soon enough.
Monday morning is a punch to the gut.
You arrive at work, feeling the weight of the weekend's fallout heavy in your chest. The first thing you notice when you pull into the parking lot is that there’s no coffee waiting for you on your desk. The usual sign of Seungkwan’s presence, of him thinking of you in the mornings, is missing. It's a stupid thing to feel the absence of, but it cuts deeper than you'd like to admit.
You walk into the office, feeling all the eyes on you. It’s not even 9 AM, and you already know today is going to drag. You get to your desk, and before you can even sit down, Aera and Ayoung are already on you, their faces lit up with exaggerated curiosity.
"Hey, Y/N," Aera says, eyes flicking to the empty space where the coffee should have been. "Where’s your coffee today? You and Seungkwan usually have that whole ‘he brings your coffee’ thing down to a science. What’s up? You two not sharing that routine anymore?"
Ayoung giggles, and you feel the irritation bubbling up before you can stop it. You’ve had enough of this.
You slam your bag down on your desk, not bothering to hide the exhaustion in your voice. "We broke up. Now get out of my face so I can work."
The words hit the air like a slap, and for a moment, the office is completely silent. Aera’s mouth falls open slightly, her eyes wide in surprise, but you can’t bring yourself to care. Ayoung just blinks, taken aback, but she says nothing more, her usual snark suddenly gone.
You don’t give them a chance to respond. You turn away from them, sitting at your desk, hands shaking slightly as you pull up your emails. You can hear their retreating footsteps, but you don’t bother looking up. You don’t care. It’s easier to just ignore them and dive into your work, focusing on the tasks in front of you.
But it doesn’t stop there. As much as you try to bury yourself in your screen, the emptiness of Seungkwan’s absence—his lack of coffee, the parking spot that you still take for granted—gnaws at you. You tell yourself that it’s for the best, that the game is over. But that doesn’t make it hurt any less.
The presentation room feels suffocating.
You stand at the front, flipping through slides, forcing your gaze to stay focused on the KPIs and metrics on the screen. The numbers are safe, the charts impersonal. You can talk about this with your eyes closed, but it feels like everything else in the room is conspiring against you.
Seungkwan, of course, keeps trying to catch your eye. Every time you glance in his direction—brief, fleeting—you see the way his expression tightens, the worry flickering in his eyes. You’re not sure if it's pity or concern, and frankly, you don’t care. You’ve worked hard to bury whatever feelings were there, and you’re not about to let him dig them up in front of a room full of people.
You force yourself to talk about the numbers. KPIs, data points, project metrics. Anything to avoid looking at him. You can feel Soonyoung and Seokmin watching you a little too intently, their eyes sharp with something unspoken. It makes your words stutter, your confidence falter just a little, but you push through, unwilling to show any weakness.
But then an executive asks if you're okay, and the words catch you off guard. You can’t help it—you glance over at Seungkwan. Just for a second. Long enough for him to notice, long enough for him to give you that look. The one you’ve been avoiding.
"I'm fine, thanks," you manage to say, voice steady despite the way your heart is hammering in your chest. You look back at the screen, not daring to meet anyone’s gaze. You try to ignore the weight of his concern, the way it lingers like a weight in the air.
The meeting eventually wraps up, and as everyone files out, Seungkwan steps towards you, his arm reaching out. You feel the familiar tug of his presence, the warmth of his hand inches away from your sleeve.
But you don’t want to feel it. You don’t want to deal with it.
You shrug him off, murmuring something about deadlines and reports that need to be finished. The words come out harsh and clipped, almost too much so, but you don’t care. You can feel the tension hanging between you like a storm cloud, but you don’t want to be near him right now. Not with everything still so raw.
You don’t wait for a response, just turn and walk toward your desk, not daring to look back.
You thought it would be easy to avoid Seungkwan. After all, it's just a matter of keeping your distance, staying busy, and letting the work pile up in a way that leaves no room for him to worm his way back into your head. You’ve been doing it for hours, and so far, it’s working.
Three hours, at least.
Seokmin and Soonyoung have been your perfect distractions, filling your day with so much nonsense that you barely have time to breathe, let alone think about Seungkwan and the mess you’ve somehow ended up in.
It started in the break room, just after the meeting. You’d been trying to sneak in a coffee, hoping it might calm the jittery feeling that’s been buzzing through you since you saw Seungkwan's hand reach for yours. But, of course, Soonyoung and Seokmin cornered you before you could even take a sip.
"Y/N, I need your opinion on something," Soonyoung had started, with that grin of his, the one that always spells trouble.
You narrowed your eyes, suspicious. "What now?"
Seokmin leaned in like they were about to discuss state secrets, whispering in a conspiratorial tone, "Soonyoung here is convinced he’s a professional ice cream taster. He wants to know if he should add ‘Certified Expert’ to his resume."
You rolled your eyes, but Soonyoung was undeterred, holding up a pint of Ben & Jerry’s with a flourish. "Can’t you see the wisdom in my plan? Who wouldn’t hire a man who knows his way around a pint of Cookie Dough?"
You snorted, shaking your head. "You’re ridiculous. But go ahead, waste your time on that. I’m trying to focus."
But no, they weren’t letting you go that easily. Seokmin started cracking jokes, distracting you with all the random things he’d overheard in the office. "Did you know that Ayoung is secretly obsessed with ‘90s boy bands? I walked in on her humming ‘I Want It That Way’ this morning, and I’m still recovering."
And Soonyoung, ever the instigator, added with a wink, "I also caught her in the hallway talking about getting a matching tattoo with Aera. Of a tiny cupcake. What do you think? The whole office would get a kick out of that."
By then, you were laughing despite yourself, pushing down the tight feeling in your chest. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to laugh, it was just that... well, everything felt too complicated. Too much.
So, you let them pull you into their nonsense. They carried on for the next hour—Soonyoung performing some ridiculous impression of an old-timey detective, Seokmin explaining his absurd theory that paperclips are an ancient alien technology (you’re still not sure if he was serious)—until you forgot, for just a moment, about everything else. Even Seungkwan.
But of course, they weren’t done. When they saw that momentary crack in your armor, they pounced, practically dragging you into a brainstorming session for next week's office party theme. Soonyoung insisted on a 'Beach Party' theme even though there was no beach within a hundred miles of your office. Seokmin argued for a retro ‘80s prom, and then proceeded to pull out old high school yearbook photos of him in a neon green tuxedo for ‘inspiration.’ You were supposed to be working, but you couldn’t help but laugh at Seokmin trying to explain why the color combo was "unbeatable."
They kept going, laughing, cracking jokes, pulling your attention from the tight knot that had been steadily winding around your chest since you left the meeting. But you knew—knew—this distraction wasn’t going to last forever.
Eventually, reality would catch up, but for now, you let them drag you along with them. The idea of facing Seungkwan, of facing what had happened, felt like too much. So you pushed it down, buried it in the ridiculousness of the day.
For now, you thought, it was working. But you had a feeling the peace wouldn’t last long.
It’s late, and you’re about to congratulate yourself on avoiding Seungkwan for the entire day as you open your car door. But of course, the universe has other plans for you. The sudden slam of the car door makes you jump, your hand still on the handle as you whip around to find Seungkwan standing there, his face set in that tight expression you know too well. The tension between you snaps, palpable in the cool evening air. His voice cuts through the silence, demanding, sharp.
"So this is how it's going to be?" he asks, the words heavy with frustration.
You freeze, your heart pounding in your chest. You were so sure you had made your escape. You had done everything you could today to keep him out of your head, to avoid this moment. Yet here he is, standing in front of you like an inevitable storm, his presence taking up the entire space between you.
You try to steady yourself, the tightness in your throat making it hard to speak. "I don’t know what you’re talking about," you manage, forcing the words out despite how small they sound against the tension hanging between you.
Seungkwan’s eyes narrow as if he’s reading you—really reading you, seeing right through the facade you’ve worked so hard to put on. "Don’t lie to me, Y/N. You’ve been avoiding me all day. It’s not just because of the work, is it? You’ve been avoiding me since... since the gala. Since everything."
You bite your lip, refusing to let the weight of his words sink in, but his voice keeps coming, a steady beat in your chest. “You think I’m just supposed to pretend everything’s fine after what happened?”
The words hit you like a slap, leaving a bitter taste on your tongue. You try to ignore the ache that stirs inside you at the mention of what happened—the kiss, the way it felt so real, so right, and yet so wrong. So much of a game. And now he’s standing here, throwing it all in your face.
"I don’t know what you expect from me, Seungkwan," you snap, unable to keep the edge from your voice. "But it’s over. I told you—I’m done."
Seungkwan’s jaw tightens, and he steps closer, his proximity making you instinctively want to step back. But you don’t. You won’t.
"Done?" he repeats, voice laced with disbelief. "Just like that? You think you can just walk away? You’re really going to pretend this—whatever this is—didn’t mean anything?"
You open your mouth to argue, but no words come out. It’s as if your body’s betraying you, locking you in this moment where nothing makes sense, where the anger you thought would fuel you evaporates the moment Seungkwan looks at you with that frustrated, helpless look in his eyes.
You hate that you care. You hate that, even now, a part of you wants to reach out and undo everything. To erase the distance, the silence, the walls you’ve built between the two of you. But you can’t.
“You always thought of it as a game, Seungkwan,” you snap, your voice a little too sharp for comfort, but it’s all you have to hold onto. The argument. The distance. The lie you’ve been clinging to.
He’s shaking his head before you even finish the sentence, a rawness in his expression you’ve never seen before. “It was never a game for me!” His words crash through the silence, leaving an echo that hangs in the air. It’s too much. Too loud.
And then, just like that, you’re back in that hallway, your heart pounding. The night air feels suffocating, and there’s a closeness between you two that should feel wrong, but it doesn’t. It feels right in the way his chest is rising and falling too quickly, in the way you can barely breathe without him being this close. Your breaths are shaky, uncertain.
“What was it then?” Your voice cracks as you ask, small and vulnerable, that gnawing fear in your chest almost swallowing you whole. You don’t want to know the answer, but you know you need to hear it.
His gaze drops, his voice softens, and it’s enough to make your stomach turn with something too familiar. “What do you think?” he whispers, just above a breath, his words more like a confession than a question.
The truth is right there, suspended between you two, but it feels like a lie at the same time. You try to push it down, try to control it, but the knot in your throat grows tighter. You’re not sure what’s worse—the silence, or the fact that you’re on the verge of hoping for something you shouldn’t.
His hand moves to your face, brushing your cheek, and you can feel the heat of his touch seeping into your skin like a live wire. “I kept the parking spot argument going because I knew it was the only excuse I had to talk to you,” he continues, his voice thick with something you can’t quite place. “You’re so smart. So beautiful. I knew you would never give me the time of day unless I made you.”
It hits you in waves, like the ground beneath you is shifting. You open your mouth to respond, to tell him that this is too much, too late, that he can’t just explain this all away—but he cuts you off, the urgency in his voice making you freeze.
“No, please. Let me finish.”
You swallow hard, the words stuck in your throat, but you stay silent, waiting for him to continue.
He steps closer, the air between you two crackling with every movement. His eyes are dark, intense, and you’re not sure if it’s fear or something else flickering behind them. “I couldn’t just let you go. I couldn’t. So I did what I had to do. I kept pushing you, testing you, because I couldn’t let you slip away.”
The honesty in his voice is like a punch to the gut. Every word seems to break down everything you thought you knew about this whole thing. You can’t speak. You’re drowning in it, caught between the words and the way he’s looking at you.
You want to run. You should run. But instead, you stay there, with his hands on you, his breath too close to yours, and the silence that threatens to drown you both.
The question slips out before you can stop it, your voice small and fragile in the heavy silence that’s settled between you two. It feels like everything is crashing down, the weight of it all pressing against your chest, but the curiosity burns through. You need to know.
"Why did you say yes? To the contract?" Your voice barely rises above a whisper, and you can’t help the way your breath catches in your throat, that desperate need to understand.
Seungkwan freezes, his hand still hovering just inches from your face, his eyes flickering with something unreadable. It’s like you’ve asked the question that’s been hanging in the air, unspoken, for far too long. And for a moment, it feels like the world is holding its breath, waiting for him to answer.
He looks away, his eyes darting to the ground as if the answer isn’t something he can say out loud. His lips part, but no words come out. He takes a breath, almost like he’s bracing himself for what he’s about to admit. And then, slowly, the words slip out, ragged and raw.
“Because I didn’t know how else to get close to you.” His voice trembles slightly, but the honesty in it cuts through you, sharp and real. “I didn’t know how else to make you notice me.”
He runs a hand through his hair, his frustration evident. “I was tired of standing in the background, watching you with everyone else, wanting to be more than just... the guy who argues with you about parking spots or steals your coffee.”
There’s a bitter chuckle, half empty, half ashamed, and it almost breaks you. He doesn’t look at you now, but his words hang in the air between you like a weight that neither of you can lift.
“I thought if I had a reason, an excuse, maybe... maybe I could make you see me. See us." He finally glances back up, his gaze soft, too soft for the harshness of his confession. “And I was wrong, okay? I was wrong to use you like that.”
The silence after his words is deafening. Every piece of you wants to scream, to shout at him for what he’s done, for the way he played with your heart like it was a game. But you can’t. Not with the raw vulnerability in his eyes, the way he stands there, exposed and unsure.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Your voice cracks, and it’s all you can manage.
His chest rises and falls with a deep, shaky breath. “Because I didn’t think you’d ever want to hear it.”
The words leave your mouth before you can stop them, a breathless, almost irritated whisper. "You're an idiot." But it's not frustration you feel anymore, it’s something deeper, something that’s been simmering just beneath the surface for far too long.
And then you can’t help it. The space between you closes, and before you even realize what you're doing, your hands are on him, pulling his face down to yours. The kiss is fierce and unrestrained, lips crashing together with a hunger that feels almost desperate, like you’ve been starved for this moment, for him, for everything that’s been left unsaid.
Seungkwan’s hands find their way to your waist, tugging you closer, his body solid and warm against yours. He responds without hesitation, his lips moving against yours with a fervor that matches your own, a mix of frustration and need, and something else—something raw and real.
The world outside of this moment disappears, the streetlights and cars, the sounds of the city—it all fades away, leaving just the two of you, caught in the storm of it all. It feels right, in a way that makes your chest tighten, in a way that makes everything else feel insignificant. The kiss deepens, and for a moment, everything that’s been left unspoken between you two finally starts to come to the surface.
When you finally pull away, breathless and dazed, his forehead rests against yours, your heart pounding in the space between you. It feels like the whole world has just shifted, everything falling into place in a way that makes sense, finally.
"How did you know my coffee order?" You ask, voice still shaky from the kiss, but your curiosity getting the better of you. You're still trying to wrap your head around all of it.
Seungkwan pauses for a moment, then a sheepish smile tugs at his lips. "I watched you," he admits quietly, his eyes softening. "I memorized little things about you, filed them away. Thought maybe one day I could use them... if I ever got the chance."
You can't help the small giggle that escapes you at his confession, the weight of it all sinking in. It's the sweetest thing you've ever heard. Before you can stop yourself, you're pulling him back into a kiss, hands sliding up to cup his face, as if this moment could last forever.
When you pull away again, your lips still tingling from his touch, you look up at him with a playful grin.
"So what do you say, fake-girlfriend?" he asks, his voice low, teasing. "Wanna be my real girlfriend?"
You laugh, the sound light and carefree, pressing your head against his chest as he wraps his arms around you. For the first time in what feels like forever, everything feels right. You breathe him in, the warmth of his embrace anchoring you.
"Only if you still bring me coffee," you murmur, grinning into his shirt.
"Done," he whispers, pressing his lips to yours again, and this time it feels like a promise—one you both intend to keep.
EPILOGUE
Seungkwan’s car is parked downstairs, and your phone buzzes incessantly as you can practically hear his impatience through the screen. You’re running late, of course, but when you finally slip into the passenger seat, he’s grumbling, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. The moment you slide in, though, his tone softens, and he’s already handing you a cup of coffee—the perfect temperature, the way you like it, the warm press of his lips against your cheek.
"You’re lucky I didn’t leave without you," he mutters, but there’s no real anger in his voice. You smile as you take a sip. This coffee isn’t from the shop across town anymore. No, Seungkwan bought an espresso machine, much to your surprise, and he’s been making them himself. "What kind of boyfriend doesn’t make coffee for his girlfriend?" he had argued one night as you laid in his lap, and you had to admit, it was an endearing (and slightly ridiculous) argument. Still, this coffee tastes better than anything you could buy, and maybe you’re biased, but you think it might actually be true.
He pulls into The Spot with an exaggerated sigh. “It’s so much nicer not having to argue with you every day for the spot,” he says, a smirk playing on his lips.
You roll your eyes and slam the car door shut with a dramatic flair. “I can pick fights about other things,” you shoot back unhelpfully, crossing your arms. “For example, your tie is hideous.”
Seungkwan gasps in mock outrage, his hand flying to his chest like he’s been personally attacked. "You did not just say that!" he yells, and then he's chasing you through the parking garage, the sound of his footsteps getting closer. You let out a shriek as you try to run in heels, but it’s no use—he catches up to you easily, hands dancing across your waist as you beg for mercy.
"Take it back!" he demands, voice filled with mock seriousness.
"No!" You laugh, still struggling against his hold, though it's a losing battle.
"Then no coffee for a week," he warns, his tone playful but authoritative.
"Boo Seungkwan!" you protest, but his grin only widens as he pulls you into the elevator, trapping you between his chest and the wall.
The elevator door dings open, and just as you step out, he pulls you back toward him, placing a kiss on your lips—slow and warm, lingering like he’s in no rush to let you go.
"Have a good day," he murmurs, his lips brushing your cheek.
"EW!" Seokmin’s voice shouts from behind you, and you can’t help but laugh at the sound of him. Seungkwan flips him off without missing a beat, the playful edge in his voice unmistakable. "This whole thing is your fault," he calls out to Seokmin’s retreating figure, who’s already halfway down the hall, grinning ear to ear.
"I know!" Seokmin yells back gleefully, his voice carrying through the hallway. "I had a really really good plan!"
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Twelve Days: Part 5 **^
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e60d2ad50c4372b861e3ed46febc487d/ba071eae4010bd7c-70/s500x750/8c55e06af6258d8a5018e74057b030f2c48dc395.jpg)
Here's the next part! Sorry it took so long 😭 But A LOT happens in this part and it might make y'all a little angry but I think the ending makes up for it!
Full Series Masterlist
WC: 10.5K
Warnings: Infidelity, mentions of slight germaphobia, mentions of unkept/untidy home life, fear of abandonment, sex (unprotected, penetrative), mentions of divorce.
It didn’t take as long as you had been expecting to hear back from Harry. Just another few days, you had just gotten into your car after a dinner service at a client’s home when his call came in. You were excited but feeling a bit nervous regarding the purpose of the call, it could be very casual but given the precarious situation you all found yourselves in, it could also be a call about things getting even more complicated. Regardless of what it was, you wanted to hear his voice.
“Hello?” You answered as you started to take off.
“Hi, how was your day?” He asked and you smiled.
“It was alright. And yours?” You asked.
“Busy. I had two lectures today, I’m just getting my things together before going home.” He shared.
“Okay. I am just heading home myself.” You shared.
“Good, I’m glad we get to accompany each other on our drives.” He said and you smiled.
“So how was it when you got back home?” You asked.
“We had a fight…she AirTag-ged my car.” He disclosed and your features twisted in concern.
“What?!”
“Right? Said she needed to confirm that I would go see you. I told her that I would’ve been honest about my plans if she asked.” Harry explained.
“It’s not like we did anything bad.”
“That’s what I told her. She seemed surprised for some reason.”
“Maybe because I’ve always been the more…liberated of the two.” You explained and he chuckled a bit and you smiled. “This would also disprove her theory that you’ve been spending time with me to make her jealous. I feel like that pisses her off more than anything.” You explained. “She’s always been first choice…” you said, “I get it though. She just puts herself out there more and whatnot, she’s easier to notice. I don’t mind that. I’m definitely more of a background girl, it’s where I thrive and feel comfortable so I’ve never competed her for it and I think she might…sense this…us as me trying to compete with her.” You explained.
“Well that’s shitty for me.”
“It is. And I promise you, I’m not trying to compete for you.” You assured him.
“I know, love. It just sucks thatshe is…” he said solemnly.
“I’m sorry.” You whispered.
“Don’t feel bad for me, love.” He hummed.
“I do because you don’t deserve it. No one does! I just hopes she…gets some clarity soon. This is getting so insane.” You sighed.
“I don’t want to…create a bigger divide but she’s being pretty harsh towards you. She thinks it’s stupid of me to invest all this time in you because according to her, you’re a flake.” He said and you pouted.
“A flake?” You asked for clarification, you were shocked.
“Yep…she’s just saying things at this point.”
“Yeah.” You hummed.
“Well, I’ve given her a month, in my head. To just get her ducks in a row, meet with the lawyer, figure out what she’s going to do…if she doesn’t, I’m going to talk to your parents and ask them to please…reason with her.” He shared and you hummed, “Do you think they would?” He asked you.
“I think so…they love you so much. My mom has always said you’re the son she never got to have.” You shared and he chuckled.
“Did she?”
“She did! Has actually said it on multiple occasions.” You reassured him.
“Well that does make me feel better.” He hummed.
“Good.” You grinned.
After getting that over with, it was just some light conversation about the good and bad parts of your days until he had arrived home. You were going to do some grocery shopping before getting back to your apartment but assured him you’d let him know when you’d made it home.
Thankfully, Ash hadn’t shown up again. You half expected another visit and had been feeling on edge arriving at your apartment the last few days, but with each passing day you tried to let the anxiety diminish. You were loving your quiet life alone so far. You also liked your apartment and were sad that you might have to move if he ever showed up again, but you just needed to not see him again. It was disrespectful really, his inability to honor your wishes after he had left you the way he had. You were feeling even more upset by Bea telling him where you had moved to. You let her know that what she had done was completely unacceptable and just blocked her on everything. You’d observed the way she always got a little more flirty when Ash was around but didn’t think it’d get to the point where she’d share your private information just to get on his good side. Especially when she knew you wanted nothing more to do with him. Hopefully, you’d seen the last of him so that you could actually focus on the dilemma at hand. Your sister.
You were genuinely feeling really worried over what Julie’s next steps would be. You wanted to talk to her but she wasn’t answering your calls or responding to any of your texts just yet. Of course she had the right to be angry with you, but to think you were just using Harry for attention or to make her jealous? That wasn’t in your nature at all. To call you a flake? You were steadfast as can be, she knew this. You were raised the same. You were definitely hurt by her remarks, but you founds some solace in the knowledge that she was projecting her own insecurities about Joe onto you. This was the man who she had personally told you had some commitment issues! The man who undoubtedly made his way back into her life when he saw the seemingly perfect life she was leading with Harry via her social media, through the outlet she had used to allow him back into her life.
You wanted to correct this narrative Julie had made up of you so badly because she ought to know you better than what she was choosing to believe of you. You had never had the type of sister relationship that made you best friends, like you’d mentioned to Harry, there’d always been an air of competition. Being just three years older than you, you’d coincided academically on a few occasions and you really didn’t start to “fight back” until high school. Naturally, you were a bit more likable because you were more laid back . You were great in your classes without imparting as much effort, which surprised your teachers. You soon learned that they expected you to be a little more of a wooer as she had been but when they learned you weren’t they eased up on you, the other students did too. Comparison was a killer and after one awful fight she told you that you had ruined her senior year. She had been cold towards you after that until she was off at college. And well, you decided not to go that route, you went to culinary school instead. And that gave her enough of the sense of superiority that she needed to have over you to placate her.
It had been a week after your conversation with Harry that you had your appointment with your therapist and had gotten to speak to her about what your sister had been saying and how you were feeling about it all. She had been supportive of you trying to go speak with her and so you had done just that. It was the end of her workday and though you felt like a stalker for being parked next to her car waiting for her…this was the only way you’d get anything from her. When you saw her approaching the car you hopped out of yours. As soon as she caught your gaze she noticeably became deflated.
“What are you doing here?” She asked you and you offered a slightly nervous smile.
“Hi.” You greeted Julie. “I was just hoping we could go for dinner and talk?” You asked hopefully.
“About?” She asked cooly.
“What you saw.” You said and you saw her lips purse a bit as she gnawed the inside of her cheek pensively.
“I don’t know…I mean…I know what I saw, I don’t think we need to rehash it.” She stated as she crossed her arms.
“Well you’re still not talking to me so…”
“Because you kissed my husband!” She scowled.
“I know and I’m sorry-”
“No you’re not.” She cut you off.
“I’m not sorry for kissing him. I’m sorry that my actions upset you and angered you.” You clarified.
“So you’re sorry you got caught?” She asked.
“Not necessarily…I mean, I know that you actually don’t care that I kissed him. You don’t love him, so I know that it didn’t hurt you.” You said and she glanced away, “So I’m here to figure out what exactly you’re still so offended with me over.” You said and her gaze found yours again.
“You couldn’t have gone for anyone else?” She asked.
“I didn’t go for him, Julie! We were literally just talking about the things that we were dealing with. I mean, we’ve always had a good relationship as friends, you know that! But through these experiences we’ve been through we bonded on a new level. The attraction was just…there. It wasn’t on purpose. It wasn’t a plan of any sort! And the fact that you believe I would do something like that…” you said sadly, “I’m not calculating like that. You know that. And to be quite honest with you, I feel like…your anger actually has nothing to do with me. It’s just being directed at me and that makes me upset.” You said and her jaw clenched a bit. “Well…that’s all I wanted to say so…” you trailed off and she just nodded but said nothing else.
After standing there in silence for a few seconds you just got into your car and left. You had done your part and now, the ball was in Julie’s court. You hoped that she would give what you’d said some honest thought and consideration. You had only been on the road for a few minutes when a call came in from Harry.
“Hey.” You greeted him.
“That was enthusiastic.” He chuckled sardonically and you couldn’t help but smile.
“Sorry. I’m just heading home from ambushing my sister.” You informed.
“Ah…I take it didn’t go too well?”
“Not really…” you confirmed. “She didn’t say much apart from the usual accusations of me interfering in your marriage.” You sighed. “I also presented to her the idea that maybe the things she’s been saying of me are actually her displacing her anger with her situation with Joe onto me. That one did upset her, I saw it in her eyes.” You elaborated.
“Yeah, she doesn’t love to be in the wrong…” Harry chuckled.
“Yeah. And have you made any headway with her?”
“I don’t know…we’ll see tomorrow. She has an appointment with the lawyer. I’ve already asked mine what I can do if she refuses to sign.”
“And what did the lawyer say?”
“I can petition through the court for them to serve her the divorce papers. If she does’t sign within a certain timeline then the judge can make a default ruling to dissolve the marriage. So there is a way to proceed if she doesn’t abide by my timeline. I just…I don’t want to put her through that humiliation because the only place I know where to find her apart from our house would be her job.”
“Yeah, that’s low…” you agreed. “I mean, you can AirTag her…” you chuckled and he laughed.
“I could…that low has been reached.” He hummed in amusement. “We also have to get a court date if I go that route and who knows how long that would take.”
“Yeah…let’s just hope she does the right thing and comes around.”
“Yeah.” Harry agreed. “I’d like to see you again soon.” He said after a beat of silence.
“I’d like to see you too.” You hummed.
“Been seeing those videos of the couples painting each other…” Harry shared and you giggled.
“Is that what you want to do?”
“Yeah! I think it’d be fun, don’t you?” He asked and you giggled some more.
“Yeah, I think so too!”
“And I can cook for you this time.”
“Love that.” You hummed.
“And we can ask each other all the questions we have for each other over dinner and the painting.” He added to his suggestion.
“Yeah! That sounds like such a fun evening!” You agreed excitedly.
“Good! So let me know when you’ll have at least two days in a row off so that we can also have a little extra time the day after.”
“Okay, I’ll check my work calendar when I get home.”
“Perfect.” Harry smiled. “How are you holding up? Did Ash show up again?”
“I’m alright, still feeling a little…annoyed, I guess. But no, he didn’t come back.” You shared.
“Would you want him to come back? I mean, just so you can clear the air?”
“The more I give it some thought, not really. He’s said what he wanted to say…that he made a mistake, that he loves me and wants me back…” you said with a sarcastic, sing-song-y cadence.
“Do you want to say anything to him?”
“Just how much he hurt me but if anything, that gives him more power over me and I’d hate that.” You confessed.
“I’d hate that for you too. But if you need that for your closure then it might be worth thinking over before completely disregarding it.” Harry advised, as much as he really did hate the thought of you giving Ash another morsel of your time and attention. He wasn’t jealous, more protective than anything. You were still a shell of yourself and he hated that Ash had done that to you.
“Maybe you’re right…but I mean, just saying it out loud is enough for now.” You said, “Thank you for…making me feel comfortable and safe enough to be able to say it.” You thanked him.
“Of course, love.” Harry replied.
Harry was happy that he could make you feel safe and looked after. But he also wanted that same reassurance from you. He understood why you weren’t leaning into that
and into your feelings for him just yet though. You had every right to feel wary about what you two had going, especially with the stance Julie had taken. But that also meant that right now he had no one to really talk about his heavier and darker feelings. He knew for a fact that if he communicated that to you, you’d be there for him but he also didn’t want to overburden you while you yourself were struggling.
“And what about you? I know that maybe your feelings for Julie are not what they used to be but…it also can’t be easy for you.” You said and he bit his lip as he gave some thought to what he wanted to say.
“You’re right about that…It hasn’t been easy. I mean, because of my family and all, it’s created this…fear of being left behind.” He explained. “That weekend that I went to see you?”
“Mhmm?”
“She didn’t come home until Monday afternoon and when I got in she’d left her suitcase by the garage door and I was just filled with dread that she was leaving without saying anything to me.” He explained. “It felt…confusing…because, while I know that the love isn’t there anymore I still…invested a lot in her. In our home…”
“Yeah, I get that.” You assured him.
“And again, it was just that fear of not having a family again. That after everything I did to build a happy home life for myself, I’d still end up…alone.” He disclosed. After a few seconds of quiet he cleared his throat. “Sorry, that was a lot.”
“Don’t be. I was just…processing, empathizing…” you said and he hummed, “If anything, I’d like you to say all of this to me as it comes. You’re always here for me. I want to be here for you too.”
“I want to tell you more but I don’t want to put more on your plate.” He explained.
“I appreciate that but I am feeling better…mentally.”
“Yeah? Since when?”
“Since…you.” You said and Harry smiled.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. Honest. It’s nice to have a friend and someone to care for with reciprocity.”
“It is. And for the record, I know that you’ll always be in my life. But a part of me is also scared that we won’t be able to have more down the line. Like, what if that gets ruined?”
“So my same fear?” You asked and he hummed.
“Guess so.” He confirmed.
“Well, there’ll always be space for you in my life. I mean that. I feel good when I’m with you and I can only imagine that it’ll only get better if we…are more.” You said timidly.
“I think so too.” Harry hummed and you smiled. “I understand that we both have things to heal from though and that it might take some time to get anywhere near where we might want to get eventually…” he trailed off and chuckled, “I don’t know if maybe I’m getting ahead of myself but I really like you and I like that I can fully be myself around you.” He explained.
You could feel your heart pounding so hard at what he was saying. You could feeling a warmth growing inside of you and spreading all throughout your body. This crush you had on him had you so affected. To hear him saying this was more of a relief than a cause for anxiety. You hadn’t allowed yourself to think that far out of fear that maybe it was intense for now but would fizzle out at some point down the line. But to hear him say that he wanted to give you two an honest shot when things got better, it made you feel a little less delusional. You loved his vulnerability with you. You could also be yourself around him in a way that was so pure. You knew he wouldn’t judge or make you feel bad for it. There was a baseline safety with him that helped your closeness grow quickly.
“Ummm…sorry. D-did I lose you?” He asked nervously and you shook your head quickly.
“Oh my god, no sorry! I was just…so happy to hear you say that.” You giggled.
“Thank god…” he chuckled in relief.
“So sorry.” You laughed through an apology again and he joined you as well.
“Ummm…a-are you far from Santa Barbara?” He asked and you bit your lip.
“Like…almost 30 minutes?”
“Hmmm…do you work tomorrow?”
“I actually don’t…” you shared.
“Can I come see you?” He asked.
“Now?”
“Yeah!” He chuckled, “If you don’t mind the company, it’s gonna be a long weekend. I won’t have class until next Wednesday.”
“You want to spend a whole ass week with me?”
“Yeah. If you’ll have me.” He hummed.
“What about Julie? I don’t want to instigate any bigger issues.”
“She hasn’t really been staying at the house since she returned from her weekend getaway.” Harry shared, “So…I think she’ll be fine.”
“Well then, I’d love to have you over.” You confirmed happily.
“Great! I’m just getting home so I’m gonna get showered, pack, and head over to you.”
“Perfect! See you soon!” You chirped, not even bothering to minimize your excitement.
“Alright, I’ll be seeing you soon.” Harry chuckled.
***********
It was nearing 8pm when Harry was calling to tell you he was outside of your building. You hurried down with your visitor’s badge to ensure his car was safe while parked there and soon enough you were heading back up to the warmth of your apartment.
“Have you eaten?” You asked him as he followed you in.
“Not yet. Do you want to order in?”
“We can but I’m not too hungry to be honest.” You explained.
“Has that been constant lately?” He asked as he set his luggage against your couch and his tote down on the couch.
“No, it’s actually been better. But I’m just…coming off my anxious wave after I ambushed Julie. I feel like it was alright but maybe I’ve made things worse.” You explained your concern as he came up to you and grabbed your hands.
“I get the anxiety but I must say that I’m proud of you for making an effort. And well, you know your sister, and whatever she does with what you said is out of your hands now, love. So try not to be too worried about it.” He advised you and you exhaled and nodded. “I know it’s a lot easier said than done, but you’ve said what you needed to and done your part, yeah?” He asked you and you nodded. “That’s all there is to it.” He said with an encouraging smile.
“I know…” you sighed and glanced down as his hands ran up your arms and rubbed over your shoulders soothingly a few times.
“Y/N?”
“Yeah?” You asked as you turned your gaze back to him.
“I’m really proud of you for doing that. I know it wasn’t easy for you.”
“Thank you.” You whispered happily.
“Can I kiss you?” He asked next and you smirked a bit.
“Of course.” You hummed as one of his hands grabbed your chin gently and angled you up, “Kiss me whenever you want.” You said softly and he smiled.
“I don’t think you know what you’re unleashing…” he responded and you giggled.
“Show me then.” You smirked and he leaned in the rest of the way until your lips were meeting.
You loved to kiss Harry and thought of it often when you’d get lost in your day dreams. The shape of his lips fit so nicely against yours. The pressure of them pressing to your own, the eagerness and need that you could feel flooding the atmosphere between the two of you was addicting. If only he knew how much you were affected by this. Your mouth parted easily to let him in as his tongue swiped against your bottom lip. He moaned in relief in perfect unison with you when his tongue smoothed against yours. He had been longing for your taste as much as you had been longing for his. You grabbed his hands and guided them around your waist and he was quick to hug around you, pulling you even closer to his body as your kiss deepened. It was so easy to get lost in the moment with Harry. You were not sitting on your counter with him standing between your legs as you made out. His hands were up your shirt and yours were feeling over his biceps. You hadn’t ever been with someone as muscular as he was. He didn’t even have to flex for you to feel how strong and built he was.
You were suddenly startled apart by your phone ringing loudly across the counter indicating that it was time for you to begin your “no screen” time. It was easy to find yourself doom scrolling, especially when you struggled to sleep, so you’d made the resolution to cut down your screen time starting at 8pm each night.
“Can you grab it for me?” You asked Harry, your lips smearing into his as you asked your question and he nodded.
“Sure.” He responded and slid his hands from beneath your shirt and walked around the counter to grab your phone before bringing it back to you.
“Sorry, I’m trying to stop using my phone by 8pm each night.” You explained as you stopped the alarm and proceeded to turn on “Do Not Disturb” mode for the night.
“Smart!” He said as his hands landed on your thighs.
“It’s hard but research says cutting off screen time before bed helps.”
“Well, that’s true.” He assured you and you smiled. “And it’s 8 already? I should order something in.” He said before stuffing his hand down his back pocket and pulling out his phone. “Are you hungry now?” He asked you with a smirk.
“Yeah, more now.” You chuckled.
“Hungry for anything in particular?”
“Tacos?” You suggested.
“Ooh, perfect! What’s good in your area?” He asked and soon you had selected a little mom and pop, hole in the way a couple miles away that had never failed you before.
After placing the order you suggested Harry get into something more comfortable and then get settled in.
“Sorry, I don’t have any space for your toiletries.” You mumbled, “But you’re more than welcome to put your clothes in a drawer! The one of the top right should be empty.”
“It’s fine. As long as you don’t mind the bag staying up here. If not I’ll just keep it in my soot case.” He said with the Baron Trump meme accent. You looked to him and burst into laughter at this.
“I’m dead! I love that video!” You cackled.
“It’s funny!” He laughed along, “One of my students showed it to me…s’been stuck in my head ever since.” He explained with a smile.
“It is a gem…well, I don’t mind you having your things out for easier access!” You assured him.
“I’m tidy. I promise.” He chuckled and you rolled your eyes playfully. “Tell me what your pet peeves are in a shared space, so that I can avoid them.” Harry requested.
“Ummm…just don’t be gross. Ash used to do this ridiculous thing where he’d leave his dirty laundry beside the hamper…” You recalled and Harry chuckled, “That pissed me off. Like it’s right there!” You expressed.
“Yeah, that’s stupid.” He chuckled.
“Or leave his towel on the ground, like he was in a fucking hotel.”
“Oh god…” Harry grimaced, “The smell…”
“Yeah! Mildewy and ugh…thinking of it is giving me the ick.” You frowned. “One time he did not unpack it from the gym and-”
“I know where it’s going, you don’t need to tell me.” He said and you giggled.
“I discovered it, so I have to tell you.”
“Fine. Go on.”
“It grew mold. The whole bag! And who discovered it in the garage?”
“Not Ash!”
“Exactly! And it was so humid that week…God, that was horrifying. Then he had the gall to be pissed at me for throwing away his Alo gym bag…ridiculous.” You huffed.
“If he cared so much about it why did he leave it in that state? What a prick.” He said and you nodded in agreement.
“Exactly what I said…he probably left it in his trunk, encountered the smell and just left it in the garage for me to find and wash.” you rolled your eyes. “And like, he wasn’t like nasty apart from those things. Like, you could tell his mom would do those things for him and his brothers.” You explained and he nodded. “What about you?” You asked.
“Ummm… well growing up my house was very neat until my mom met that prick of a man and then it was pretty unkept. I did a lot of the cleaning up so uh…I guess just clutter and dishes in the sink. That invites ants and cockroaches, which I detest. And well, one time I was going to treat myself to some biscuits and was met with a mouse in the packet so uh… yeah, I’m a little bit of a clean freak.” He explained. You could see that when he talked about these things he got a distant look in his eyes. Like he had to remind himself that, that wasn’t his life anymore. “Also, no eating in bed.” He added, “Because that is literally inviting bugs.” He explained and you nodded.
“Noted. Though I must admit, I have eaten in bed…specially when I’ve gotten sick and no one’s around to look after me.”
“Well you’ve got me now so…no need for that.” He said and you smiled.
“Yeah.” You hummed. “But being in the valley, there are just critters around so it is important to keep things extra clean. I haven’t had any encounters, thankfully! I’m very averse to them.” You explained.
“Yeah, they’re gross.” He agreed.
“Anything else?” You asked.
“Oh! Getting on the bed in outside clothes.”
“Okay, yes!” You agreed, “There are “safe” spaces for me though, I don’t know about you? But like if I visit my parents or friends that don’t have pets, I wouldn’t mind a quick sit on my bed, not gonna roll around in it either…” you said and he chuckled, “But that’s not as gross as if I had gone out to a restaurant or the movies, for example.”
“Well, wouldn’t your car seats have all the germs from everywhere else? So when you sit in the car that gets on your clothes, even if you were in a safe space…” you pouted after he explained.
“Oh god…we could be laying in filth right now…” you said with feigned concern.
“When did you last wash your comforter?” He asked, you knew he was trying to come off pretend-horrified but his eyes said otherwise.
“I’m messing with you! Literally over the weekend. I promise!” You laughed as he looked at you skeptically.
“Pinky promise?”
“Yeah!” You said as you extended your pinky out to him and he wrapped his around yours.
“If I get pink eye, we know what happened here.” He joked and you rolled your eyes at his dramatics as he sniggered. He then interlaced his fingers with yours and just held your hand in his. You could see that there was a lot going on in his mind and you wanted to help however you could.
“Is there anything you want to talk about?” You asked him tentatively.
“Tons! But ummm…time and place.” He said as he glanced down at your hands. You squeezed his hand and he glanced up at you.
“Tell me.” You insisted and he sighed.
“Just that…when your sister leaves, for good, I was thinking about how long I’d have to be alone in that house. Like…I saved up a lot for that with the hopes of having a life and a family there, you know?” You nodded in understanding. “I don’t know if I could be there as comfortably if I were alone. I’d hate to sell it but…what would be the point in keeping it?” He asked and you hummed. “And you really don’t have to say anything about it, I just…am a little nervous to be all alone again. And like, I know that I wouldn’t be totally alone, but in a way I haven’t been in a decade you know?”
“Yeah, I get that.” You assured him.
“Like things would be missing that have been there since we moved in together…half of the things would be gone…and well, I couldn’t very well ask or expect you to be able to visit as often as I’d probably like…” he added.
“I get it. It’s scary.” You said and he nodded.
“How’d you do it?” He asked and you smiled.
“Well, I’m in the middle of that and well, I am depressed!” You chuckled and he smiled, “So…still learning how to cope, I guess. This, with us? It’s helped. I don’t feel so alone anymore.” You explained.
“Good.” He hummed.
“Yeah, so if you… need me to go out there and hang out you can ask. Whatever the reason in your brain is that’s holding you back from asking me for reciprocity? It’s wrong. If being there and enjoying the home you worked so hard for is important to you, then it’s important to me too.” You assured him with a sincerity that he hadn’t seen from anyone in years and you saw his lips turn up a bit.
Harry just felt this sudden rush of warmth overcome him. He definitely wanted you over more, he just felt a little bad about it right now while things were still up in the air. He wanted to live there forever, he hadn’t committed to buying a home thinking that he would one day grow sick of it. It was heaven on earth to him. He could step out onto his balcony and see the ocean from it! Of course he had made compromises along the way to accommodate Julie like in decor, in paints, upgrades…but he still loved the house. And to know that you’d be willing to make the drive out and spend time with him there simply because he loved it and was comfortable there, well, that was almost more than he could ever ask for. So he was really glad that you had offered it.
“I’d actually really like that.” He finally said and you smiled.
“Okay. Then we’ll make it happen.” You assured him and he smiled and let go of your hand but only because he was pressing himself up to kiss you again. And as your new normal seemed to be, you got lost in it until the delivery person’s call was interrupting you.
You had initially been concerned that maybe you’d pushed him too far or said too much but by the way he was acting now, it seems you had said the correct thing. Harry was a protector, he always had been that way. He was very concerned for your sister, for you, your family… it was never in a way that made you feel incapable, but he just liked to show you all that he would take care of you all if shit hit the fan. You knew that it had been hard for him not to be able to do that for you in the last year, even when he was going through his own stuff. So now, you wanted to allow him to make up for lost time and as you had said, you wanted to reciprocate the way he made you feel and were glad that he felt like you were.
“M’afraid you’re not gonna get a turn, love…” Harry practically slurred with his cheek smushed up against your stomach. You were currently laid on the couch, longways of course, and had put on “Miss Congeniality”. But you had agreed to give each other massages. However, Harry had elected for you to massage his head and it was putting him to sleep.
You giggled, but kept on going. “S’alright.” You responded softly. You could feel him growing heavier against you. “Maybe we should move to the bed though. Don’t want you to have a rough night.” You explained.
“In a minute.” He mumbled.
“Okay.” You agreed.
Soon enough you’d made it to your bed and as soon as you got under the covers he was reaching for you and pulling you against him. You smiled as you snuggled in against him. You felt him kiss your shoulder before he exhaled and you knew it would be so easy to fall asleep tonight.
*************
When you woke up the next morning it wasn’t because of your alarm, it was just a force of habit. But you were shivering from the cold and were pleased that it was apparently raining. You could heard the soft patter against your bedroom window. And then, you heard Harry humming along to John Mayer just a few feet away in the kitchen. Despite wanting to stay tucked away in the warmth of your bed, you got up and hurried into the bathroom to relieve yourself and freshen up a little bit. When you emerged, Harry was back in bed, topless and smiling at you.
“Morning.”
“Good morning.” You smiled.
“You were snoring.”
“I was not…” you mumbled bashfully as you headed back over to the bed.
“You were! But not like, loud or scary, it was just soft.” He described with a grin. “It was cute! Like a cartoon.” He assured you and you rolled your eyes as you got back in bed. “I just put on some coffee.”
“Thanks.” You hummed as you turned on your side to face him.
“Course.”
“Now, c’mere, please. It’s cold.” You requested and he smiled and hurried over into your side.
“What do you wanna do today?” He asked.
“Be lazy.” You said and he chuckled. “I do have a client to cook for tomorrow, s’just dinner prep, so I should be back around 6-6:30 the latest.”
“Would you be up to doing something after?” He asked.
“Yeah!” You hummed.
“Something lowkey, yeah?”
“Yeah, that sounds good.” You confirmed.
“Perfect. Now, I’m gonna kiss you.” He mumbled.
He moved closer and leaned in until your lips were meeting slowly but still eager and saturated with passion. Your hand landed on his chest and slid over his shoulder, tugging him into you, inviting him to settle over you. Your legs tangled momentarily as he started to straddle you. He was holding your jaw as your kiss deepened even further. His hands were sliding up your body, dragging your top up as he went. You sat up to help him pull it off and as soon as he was able, he was back on you, his lips littering your chest in kisses and delicate but playful nicks to your breasts. Your fingers combed through his hair, relishing in the sensations he was giving you. You were absolutely desperate for him and your skin was tingling, you were desperate to feel the warmth of his hands over your arms. You wanted to kiss him again and so you tried to tug him up and he quickly got the hint and kissed up your chest, neck, and jaw before kissing you sloppily. You ground up against him to feel the bulge in his thin pajama pants against you. He grinned and ground down against you with more intent.
“Is that what you want?” He asked and you blinked up at him.
“More.” You whispered and his gaze softened.
“You sure?” He asked you and you nodded.
“Yes. Please.” You beseeched and Harry smiled before kissing you once more. In moments, he was helping you undress. You were both moving impatiently and albeit a little clumsily, but you were absolutely desperate for each other. And as his naked body hovered over yours you finally felt a little bit better. Relieved. “Please get inside me.”
“Okay.” He hummed and kissed your lips once more, “Didn’t think to bring condoms. D-do you have some?” He asked and you huffed.
“No.” You muttered in slight irritation. You hadn’t planned to ask him to have sex with you, if you had, you would have stocked up, just in case.
“Would you care if we didn’t use one?” He asked and you bit your lip pensively. “Obviously, we don’t have to if you’re not comfortable with it. And well, I can go buy some really quick and give you some time t-to really think about if you really want to do this. You know, in case you maybe have s-some doubt?” He asked.
“I don’t have any doubts.” You assured him with a smile, “D-do you?” You asked and he shook his head, his little smirk mirroring your own.
“No. I can go get the condoms.” He said again and you bit your lip for a second.
“Ummm…that’s alright.” You assured him and as happy as he was to hear you say that, he gave it a few seconds to let you change your mind.
“Sure?” He asked again and you nodded.
“I’m so fucking sure.” You whispered through a nervous chuckle and he smiled and kissed you again.
“I’ll be mindful to pull out, okay?” He mumbled into your lips.
“Yeah.” You agreed as you raised your leg over his hips to give him space to get inside of you. You could feel the heat and weight of his cock pressed up against you. “I want you so bad.” You whispered.
“I do too, baby.” He hummed as he ground down, letting his cock settle between the sticky and swollen folds of your pussy. You shivered when his tip kissed at your clit with his soft thrusts. “Right there?” He asked and you nodded frantically.
“Yeah, that feels good.” You confirmed breathily and he smiled as his eyes bore into yours.
“Go on then, get what you need.” He hummed lowly and you wasted no time in grinding along with him at your desired pace. You whined lowly as you started to feel the pleasure escalating from the friction. Just when you were getting close you stopped yourself.
“Want to stop?” He asked you, looking into your eyes to ensure everything was okay.
“No, but I don’t want to come like that.” You explained a bit bashfully.
“Oh…I see.” He hummed with a smirk on his face that made you blush. “Get me inside then.” You smiled and reached down between your bodies. You grabbed a hold of his cock, he was so fucking hard. You raised your hips a bit as you guided him down to your entrance and when you felt that slight dip you rubbed him over your slit a few times. Your eyes flickered up to his only to see his brows furrowed together at the feeling of being just on the edge of slipping inside of you.
“Do it.” You whispered and he let his weight drop down to his hips and just like that he was being swallowed up by your hot and wet muscle. The two of you moaned in unison when he sunk in all the way and collided with your back wall. He held inside for a few second before groaning as he drew back and sunk in again. You exhaled shakily and grabbed his face to kiss him deeply. “Harder.” You said and he nodded before fucking into you with more force and that was absolutely what you were after. You moaned in relief and he kissed you deeply again.
“Good?” He asked.
“Yeah, it feels so good!” You whined and he hummed in satisfaction.
You were already so close, but you wanted to be closer, as close as was physically possible. You wanted to feel overwhelmed by him in the best way possible. And when he delivered his next thrust harder than before you couldn’t help the moan that fell from your mouth. Harry groaned and went again and again, relishing in the satisfied, little grunts you were making. You were absolutely drenching his cock but you couldn’t help it because he was thrusting up against the most sensational spot inside of you. It was almost too deep for you but you welcomed the feeling, you wanted to feel the ache after he was gone in a few days. And it’s almost like he could read your mind as he thrust in and held himself inside of you, grinding into you, watching as your eyes squeezed shut and you shuddered at the sensation of him fucking you that deep.
“Fuck y’feel so good!” You whimpered as you squeezed your legs around his hips and he grinned as he watched your brows pinching together.
“Not as good as you feel, baby.” He hummed lowly, “So fucking wet and hot…” he grumbled, “Shit…gonna need you so fucking badly. All the time. Gonna be dreaming of how nice it feels.” He muttered against the column of your throat.
You were completely covered in goosebumps, you were trying to stop your legs from trembling but you wouldn’t be able to hold that off for much longer. It just felt too fucking good…he was hitting a part inside of you that even had your clit tingling, if you rubbed on it, it would truly be too much. As badly as you wanted and needed to come, you wanted him to keep fucking you. For him to be your first fuck after all this time, it was well worth it. You could hear the wet squelches of your arousal slicking up his cock and helping him fit inside of you. His girth and length were to die for and absolutely addictive.
“Fuck, you’re gonna make me come!” you warned him and he grinned down at you, very pleased with himself for how fucked out he had you already.
“Already?” He gloated slightly and you smiled and nodded. Your vision was even blurry at this point as tears of ecstasy and joy welled up in your eyes. “You’re already so fucking gone f’me, S’gonna wipe you out.” He said smugly and you hummed with a slight smile.
He was right, this orgasm would absolutely ruin you and melt your brain. He was literally fucking you better, quite literally forcing your brain to flood your body with that deliciously and slightly terrifying cocktail of oxytocin and dopamine. You swore your skin was tingling, every single cell in your body was going to contribute to this orgasm. But the longer you held off the more intense everything felt. Your walls were throbbing uncontrollably and you were trying so hard to just hold off for a second to make it last longer but it made it worse, as you squeezed the deep plunges of his cock became even more pleasurable and your legs started to tremble and your breathing to shallow.
“Come on, baby. Give it t’me.” He encouraged you and you nodded before pulling him down to kiss you and as your lips met urgently in a messy kiss you started to come. You emitted these pathetic whines and whimpers you’d never ever made before as the ecstasy took over every single part of your body. You were trying not too make too much noise but you were on fire and it had never felt like that before, it was almost too much! Harry’s lips parted from yours so that you could breathe and properly release your sounds as your hips ground up into his to keep the pleasure going. One of your hands pressed down on his butt, holding him close to you and the other was tangled in the curls at the back of his head. He groaned as you squeezed hard around his cock. Your tight, hot muscles were suffocating and contracting around his girth, he nearly fucking drooled from how delicious it felt to be buried in you like this. “M’gonna come.” He panted.
“Come inside of me.” You slurred and he moaned at the mere idea of getting to flood your hot, little pussy with his sperm. He got goosebumps as he thought about how good it would feel to have you take it all. To pull out and see it dripping from your swollen and wrecked little hole only for him to push his cock back into you and get his load back into you. “Please, come in my pussy.”
“Fuck, baby…” he chuckled as he pressed his forehead to yours, “I’m gonna come so hard.” He panted, “Gonna drown your little pussy.” He mumbled as his abs started to clench and his toes to curl. And moments later he was grunting through three hard and pointed thrusts before stilling. He pressed right up against you and moaned deeply in satisfaction as he came undone. He felt his muscles spasming, struggling to hold his weight as he started to gush inside of you. You could feel the dramatic twitches of his cock lodged up deep inside of you as he filled you up, just as he promised and it was so good, his hips were moving by his own accord at this point and he was enslaved to the feeling of being inside of you, no matter how sensitive it was starting to feel for him. “Fuck…” he panted lowly.
You could feel his arms trembling and just hugged him tight, encouraging him to drop his weight over you and he did easily. Your fingers danced and tickled over the heated and slightly damp skin of his back as he came down from it. You were finding comfort in his deep inhales as he continued trying to catch his breath. After a few more moments of this he was still completely silent. You knew there was nothing wrong because he was practically melted against your body, and you smiled and kissed the top of his head as he started to sponged a few sloppy kisses along your jaw. With the little strength he had built up again, he pulled you both onto your sides. He slipped from you with the change in position but you draped your leg over his hip and his hand immediately ran up your leg soothingly while he rested his head over his other arm. You were smiling as you just watched him, he still had his eyes closed as he regulated his breathing.
“You alright there?” You inquired, your voice was a whisper but he could hear the slight hint of smugness in it.
“Just a little light headed.” He chuckled his confession and you giggled and reached for his face. You caressed the side of his face lovingly with the backs of your fingers.
“Want me t’get you some water?” You asked.
“No, stay here with me.” He responded and you smiled.
“‘Kay.” You whispered. You just watched him for a few seconds until he slowly blinked his eyes open. You smiled as he squinted a bit.
“Jesus, I’m seeing spots.” He laughed lowly through his admission and you started to giggle along with him. “Don’t laugh at me.” He griped and you leaned forward and smooched over his pouted lips.
“M’not. I’m laughing with you.” You mumbled against his mouth and he quickly kissed your lips back.
“Sure…” he hummed and finally opened his eyes and met your adoring gaze.
“We’re going again later, right?” You asked and he laughed for a moment before kissing you again and nodding.
“Oh absolutely. I might not be able to walk but it’ll be worth it.” He mumbled into your kiss-swollen lips.
“God…but good.” You giggled, completely satisfied with his response.
“I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you.” He whispered and you glanced away bashfully and instead focused on the swallow tattooed over his left pectoral.
“Neither do I.” You admitted and he smiled as you leaned closer and buried your face into the crook of his neck and took a deep inhale before placing a kiss at the base of his throat.
There was only one thought at the forefront of his mind right now and it was that there was absolutely no world in which this didn’t end with him falling absolutely and hopelessly in love with you. He loved everything about you and what he’d seen of your life so far, he couldn’t wait to experience it for the rest of the days he’d be here with you.
Several Days Later…
You didn’t want to verbalize just how perfect the last several days had been with Harry in case you were to jinx it, but you were certainly thinking about it with each passing minute. You had clients that day so you had to leave Harry at your place for but it was so lovely to return to a clean home and a meal. As soon as you walked in you could smell the lingering fresh scent of cleaning products but were mostly overpowered by what you were kind of hoping was a bolognese sauce. Thankfully, you were able to make off from your last client with a little extra dessert, so you had something to contribute for tonight.
“Smell’s amazing!” You announced your arrival as you slipped out of your shoes.
Harry didn’t respond so you figured he was in the shower or something. And as you walked further in you saw that the table was set and two long stick candles were lit, giving the setting a more intimate feel. You bit your lip to hold back your excitement. It was your last night together, so you weren’t surprised that Harry was pulling out all the stops until the next time you got to be together. You headed towards your bedroom to change into a fresh and more comfortable outfit and when you stepped inside you saw Harry just standing at the window and glancing out towards the busy street below.
“Harry?” You called in question and he sniffled and turned around.
“Sorry, I was trying to collect myself-”
“What happened? What’s wrong?” You asked quickly as you let your purse drop to the floor and rushed over to him.
“Your mom called,” he said and you immediately though the worst, your heart dropped, “Julie told them that she’s pregnant.” He said and you stopped right before you reached him. Not as terrifying as you thought but still incredibly fucking awful. Your features furrowed in disappointment and your stomach turned as the information processed. Harry hurried over to you, “Baby, it’s not me. It couldn’t be, we haven’t slept together since like August!” He explained and you nodded and let him take your hands. “But they don’t know that.”
“Ask for a paternity test.” You said right away.
“I will.” He assured you. “I guess she said she wasn’t feeling well so your mom drove her to the urgent care and they found out. Your mom called me all excited about it… I just don’t want to humiliate her.” He explained.
“And that’s very noble and considerate of you, Harry. But you do realize that she’s trying to put you in an impossible position.” You said and he frowned. “You deserve to do this. To have a family on your own terms, Harry.” You said and he nodded.
“I-I don’t even know what to do about this.” He stammered, still in shock.
“This is going to sound awful but…tell your lawyer.” You said and he sighed. “She’s willing to force you into this situation when you had nothing to do with it. If she has to prove paternity she will have to be honest. She loves Joey and she did this with him, they need to figure this out together.”
“You’re right.” He conceded. “Ummm… I’m not feeling too hungry any more. I’m sorry.” He said and glanced down at the floor.
“That’s alright. I understand.” You assured him. “I also understand if you…need some space.” You said and he glanced into your eyes again.
“Yeah… I ummm…I should go.” He said and you nodded, “They’re expecting me to look after her since she isn’t feeling well. And the drive’ll help, I think.” He muttered, but he was quite absent.
“Okay.” You said softly and he just walked around you and into your closet to grab his suitcase. You just watched silently as he robotically and haphazardly just dumped his things into the luggage before shutting it and wheeling it out. You followed after him as he headed to the entrance and slipped into his sneakers.
“Harry.” You said and he glanced up at you. You could see his eyes welled up with tears. “Please be safe.” You said and he nodded before rushing out. As soon as the door shut your own tears started to trickle down your face.
You were relieved when he texted you that he’d gotten home and assured him that if he needed to talk at all that you’d be there for him. But you felt so angry at your sister for this one. How could she do this to him? It was awful and selfish behavior. You wanted to call her but this wasn’t your battle to fight.
Harry’s POV:
Harry felt completely blindsided by Isabel’s phone call about Julie. He felt sick to his stomach as he parked in the garage because Isabel was still at their house, her car was up front and he had no idea how he would swallow down all that devastation and dread he was feeling. He didn’t want to ruin Isabel’s excitement but pretending that he was happy about this…having to hold and kiss Julie, congratulate her for something he had nothing to do with, it made him sick to his stomach. He texted you to let you know that he’d made it safely and you immediately loved his message and with that he made it inside.
“Oh good! You’re home!” Isabel greeted him excitedly as soon as Harry made it inside from the garage. He put on a smile and nodded, approaching her to greet her.
“Yeah, sorry it took me a while. I was out in LA.” He explained.
“No problem, as long as you made it safe!” She said as she opened her arms and he ducked down a bit to hug her and kiss her cheek. “Congrats, mijo.” She hummed happily as she gave him a firm squeeze.
“Thank you.” He responded as they pulled away slowly.
“I’m just making her some ginger tea, she’s been very nauseous.” Isabel explained.
“Thank you, I’m gonna go see her now.”
“Yes, please!” She insisted, beaming from ear to ear and he smiled and made his way out of the kitchen.
Every step he took up towards the bedroom made him even more sick to his stomach. He hoped there was extra of that ginger tea because this was getting to be too much. When he made it to the top landing he saw the bedroom door open and he made his way over to see Julie scrolling through her phone.
“Hey.” She greeted him solemnly.
“Hi.” He said quite cooly.
“Look-”
“What the fuck is the matter with you?” He cut her off and she frowned.
“Not while my mom is here, Harry.” She sighed.
“No. We’re doing this right now.” He insisted as he pushed the door back leaving it slightly ajar.
“Then close it all the way.” She said.
“Then we won’t hear her coming. I won’t raise my voice if you don’t.” He said and she sighed. “There is no way you didn’t know.” He insisted, “When did you find out?”
“On Monday.” She said, “I missed my period last week and I took two tests on Monday. One positive and the other inconclusive. Sometimes it can be stress or other things that impact so I figured I should go and find out.”
“And you had to take your mom to do that?”
“I was scared!” She defended herself.
“Then you should’ve asked Joe.” He retorted.
“I didn’t want him to freak out!”
“But you’re okay with your mom thinking that I got you pregnant?!” He asked angrily and her eyes started welling up. “You have to tell your parents now, Julie.” He said.
“Harry, please-”
“No! I’m not going to take responsibility for this!”
“And what if he leaves me?” She asked and Harry’s eyes softened for a moment.
“I-I don’t know but you have been cheating on me for months! We haven’t slept together since last year! This has nothing to do with me, Julie!” He was trying not to raise his voice but he was so hurt and angry at her. “You don’t love me and I know for a fact you don’t want this with me.” Harry finished and she started to sniffle as her tears fell. “You have to tell your family the truth!” He urged.
“Do you know how humiliating that will be!?”
“If you had agreed to the divorce when I brought it up not as much as it might be now! If you don’t come clean to your parents about this I will involve my lawyer and demand a paternity test! And we both know what the result will be.”
“I need more time.” She said softly.
“You have until the end of the month.”
“Harry-”
“You tell them or I do.” He said sternly.
Isabel’s POV:
She hadn’t meant to eaves drop, she just wanted to come ask Julie if she would want some toast with her tea to settle her stomach when she heard the hushed argument.
“Harry, please-”
“No! I’m not going to take responsibility for this!” She heard Harry respond. She almost intervened when she heard this, feeling so much anger rising up in her at the sound of her son-in-law being so disinterested and cold after finding out he would be a father!
“And what if he leaves me?” Julie asked and she stopped from reaching for the door. She was momentarily frozen in shock as she processed Julie’s concern.
“I-I don’t know but you have been cheating on me for months! We haven’t slept together since last year! This has nothing to do with me, Julie!”
Isabel could hear it in his voice that he felt bad but if this was not his child, he truly had no obligation to her. Especially if she had been having an affair for who knows how long.
“You don’t love me and I know for a fact you don’t want this with me.” Harry added. “You have to tell your family the truth!”
“Do you know how humiliating that will be!?” Julie cried quietly and Isabel frowned and started to back away, hearing faintly about previous discussions of a divorce. This was very private and she had heard more than she probably should have.
She was completely taken by surprise and immediately felt so bad for Harry and the situation that she had unintentionally put him in. She could only imagine how devastated he felt knowing that his wife was pregnant with another man’s child. A man that might not even stick around to help her or support her with this. Obviously she would always love her daughter, but it didn’t mean that she would always support her choices and this choice…to have an extramarital affair. To not grant Harry the divorce he had seemingly asked for before when she didn’t even love him anymore. The gall to ask him to stick around if the other man didn’t… it did not sit well with her and made her feel so frustrated at her. She hoped that Julie would say something soon because there was no way she could keep quiet for too long. Harry had been so good to all of them and he did not deserve that.
FINAL PART...
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#harry styles#harry styles fan fic#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles smut#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fluff#harry styles writing#harry styles fan fiction#harry styles reader insert#husband!harry styles#harry styles fluffy fic#harry styles stories#harry styles reader insert fanfic#harry x you#harry styles x you#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x reader#harry styles fic recs#harry styles fic recommendation#0nlythrowharrybeaux
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MORE BOTTOM ANDRE HCS PLEASEEE🙏🙏🙏 THEY ARE SO YUMMY !!
YAY!! Sure thing pookie !! These r a little different, a little darker, but I hope you guys still like these :D
Top Cal, Bottom Andre
One time, shortly after hooking up, Calvin sauntered up behind a clearly sore Andre, slithered an arm around his torso, and buried his face into his neck, mumbling an offhanded comment into his shoulder. Andre had grown rigid, briefly startled by the affectionate gesture that strongly juxtaposed both his words and the condescending smile present on his face. He was quiet for a moment, then called Calvin an asshole… for which the other teen bounced back with an empty threat, “You wouldn’t talk to me like that if I had a knife to your throat, Andre.”
Andre didn’t expect Cal to be speaking to his comrade with such violence. Because after a beat of silence, the teen mentioned about how easily he could kill him… how he could just make such a messy, uneven line extending across his throat, as if engraving the x-axis of Andre’s cervical vertebra with the tip of his switchblade. It wasn’t a threat, though. It was just reminding Andre of what Cal could do if he was really that insane. If he really despised the prospect of emotional infidelity within the Army of Two. Andre isn’t normal, though. And Cal isn’t normal either. But it’s just a hypothetical scenario, just a thought. Andre pushed him away, told him to chill the fuck out, but Cal squeezed his hip before pulling back, a sense of pseudo-innocence emanating from his demeanor, breathing into the air.
There was a time that Andre did joke about letting Cal mess with his body if he was dead. He was being half-serious at the time, as intrusive questions popped up in his head from time to time, curious to know what Cal would do if he somehow died before him. Which— he’s fully prepared to live for Zero Day, so his playful question wasn’t meant to sound as though it meant deeper than it actually did. However, he somewhat noticed Cal’s enthusiasm toward the wholly natural, and sometimes brutal, process of death. While Andre never judges him— well, he can’t judge him, as he’d be a hypocrite if he did— the way Cal had seemingly joked back to him with an almost hesitant agreement now prompts Andre to believe Cal might not have been fooling around.
Calvin is quite sarcastic and likes making Andre feel humiliated during sex, even when he’s treating him sweeter. But Andre does quite enjoy when Cal “shows him his teeth”. To elaborate, sometimes he’ll make Andre squirm with discomfort, like if he’s got his hand on his throat and blocking his intake of oxygen. Sometimes he’ll evoke desperate gasps and groans out of his comrade, if he’s thrusting painfully slow, giggling down at his pathetic form. Sometimes he’ll stimulate and provoke Andre into softly yelping and grunting with pleasure. Sometimes he’ll forcibly remove Andre’s control of the situation, albeit temporarily. Sometimes he’ll treat him harshly, like a lieutenant colonel demanding his army soldier to get up, get up, be a man. Andre never can, especially when Cal’s got three fingers in his ass, clumsily nudging his sensitive prostate gland with shaky fingers.
Calvin has tried to be a little handsy with Andre out in public, even if he was attempting to be subtle… or so he’d say. However, Andre always pulled away from Cal, pushing his hand off and yanking his hand out of his pants, mumbling to him about how they’re in public, and to stop doing that. Because chances are, someone they know could be around— New Stratford isn’t exactly a big city. Neither boy wants their peers to find out about their amorous arrangement, despite the infrequent riskiness.
From what the public saw on Andre and Cal’s tapes following Zero Day and their suicides, they were evidently different people when they were alone together, compared to when they were with others. While some people— like their family and friends— saw a different boy when they were with them, a different underlying persona, Andre and Cal were truly the only ones who really knew how each other acted. For example, a few times Cal had wanted to record he and Andre having sex— engaging in the intimacy that people around them believed they lacked. While Andre was initially opposed, he was able to be convinced into agreeing. And god, Cal came multiple times, nearly dropping the camcorder as his legs trembled, with Andre convulsing underneath him. Andre had groaned out a, “Don’— Don’t break my fucking camcorder…”
Andre is so sensitive when he’s “beaten down” and “crumpling like paper”… Calvin likes to abuse that.
#zero day#zero day 2003#zero day movie#andre kriegman#cal gabriel#calvin gabriel#calvin and andre#caldre#andre and cal#cal and andre#zeroday#zero day headcanons#calvin robertson#cal robertson#andre keuck#calvin zero day#cal zero day#zero day cal#andre zero day#zero day andre#zd#zd 2003
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Names have power some names destiny can’t let turn into myths
I am in a mood so legend gets it again
Fanfic prompt :
We have no idea where cadence of Hyrule fits in timeline wise as it potentially can be whatever
But since link is a toon in that one I kinda want him to be a lil teen still when it happened
So I had this very horrifying thought
Since link can die literally endlessly
What if he can’t truly age as well like every few decades he will come back being a lil guy and it will literally not stop
Any death brings him back to being a lil teen a few years short of his age during linked universe
Be it a quick death or a very slow one
Even dying from old age won’t be his end
But that gets even more horrifying when we consider that the theory of which link is in link between worlds
Because the Zelda from the original games canonically has a different appearance
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ceddade6c20a84fcf79e0fe6a6ac847c/665253109cc0e329-aa/s250x250_c1/d3d55ffc67eb54a3e43e05269ce4b82a798c776f.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/769170c5b2065948ebf2612e1fb64372/665253109cc0e329-f2/s400x600/0b5cc810ecff57cbb0ed33df339248d654358b8e.jpg)
But the Zelda in link between worlds also looks different initially which made many people wonder what timeline this games belong in
So what if link to the past along with oracle of seasons and link between worlds have literal decades between eachother
Because that way the Zelda kidnappings will not even be ridiculous
Like link to the past was one Zelda
The final oracle game Zelda was a descendant of the other who was kidnapped much later
and link between worlds was the descendant of the descendant
And fable is actually the great granddaughter of the first Zelda that legend met
(If we go with the legend is related to Zelda theory it gets even worse because that is his great grand niece.. the angst)
And he is centuries old and Ravio had no clue that he moved in with a centuries old being
Because that would be hilarious if Ravio is like 20 at most while legend barely remembers the joy of being just twenty
A romance between them would literally be both the worst most painful thing because legend knows Ravio will leave as well one day
And they will never truly grow old together and he will just be alone again after a few decades
And the most bitter sweet thing in existence
As legend cherishes every moment he has with the people he still has left knowing that hylia will never let him leave this earth
He once wished to end his life because after Marin he thought he deserved to join the women he killed
Only to realize living on without this closure was the punishment he so desperately sought for
To live on and on knowing that he will never get to explain himself to all the people he lost
His uncle he will never get to tell how he felt
Marin he could never hope to explain why he killed her or even apologize to her for that
Zelda and her little girl are long gone he cannot tell them how much he loves their little girl how much he wants to protect the newest Zelda just as he protected all the others before her
Din and her troupe , Nayru , Ralph , styla and his fellow heroes from hytopia are long dead and….
He is the only one still there all alone
And that way all the Zelda re designs would make a tragic amount of sense like all of them being different people reminding him of his sister
Fable knowing that her great grand uncle has been hanging around since her birth and therefore relying on him despite not truly knowing him because he keeps a distance she tries to break so much
Ravio who has such happy memories who knows that his life with link is very very short, knowing that one day he will die as well yet link will never follow he will wait for all eternity but his husband will never come join him
The chain who eventually became more people legend loves so dearly who legend grew to love he knows that some he will never see because they are in different timelines.
Yet he has his very vast memories of all those people
Remembering fighting time and Wild for the title old man (he unfortunately didn’t win)
Remembering teasing twilight , skyand warriors (and totally losing half the time)
Remembering when wind wanted to sail with him claiming they were pirates together
Remembering so much fun and excitement
hoping that he will meet hyrule some day if he just keeps living on (knowing he has no real choice)
That there is one thing worth looking out for when he already lost so much over and over…
Yet hyrule never fell like rulie said it will instead of it falling down , somehow it persisted
And he met a new descendant the granddaughter of fable's
For all his hope of meeting hyrule ,he met echo instead
And a new adventure began for him once again
But for all his hopes where crushed he at least know that at least in this timeline another boy wouldn’t have to fight his battle
For as often as he fell in battle
Hylia brought him back to keep fighting them
His battles will not fall on another child this time
For he was the hero of legends
And legends never die
#tw sad shit#tw weepingtalecowboy being bored#tw legend#tw sui related#legend going through it#linked universe#lu legend#lu wind#lu time#lu warriors#lu four#lu sky#lu wild#lu hyrule#lu twilight#tw sadness#tw existential dread#link to the past#link's uncle#link's awakening#lu marin#lu ravio#ravioli is my preference but marin offers such good angst potential#lu fable#link between worlds#triforce heroes#lu echo#cadence of hyrule#prince legend#princess legend
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can i kindly ask for a summary of how time is measured in your au? mostly the cycle/year stuff, im not sure if it's lifted from elsewhere or your own creation — either way i think it's really cool :) world building is awesome
very sorry if you've already gone over this elsewhere
Oh sure! I spent way too long figuring this out so i might as well explain it.
The cybertronian calendar goes in one direction forever unless a new Prime decides to reset it. Nova Prime reset the calendar when he declared the new Golden Age of Expansion, which is why Megatron’s canon Birthday is so small (1st cycle 012) as he was among the first Cold Constructed mechs onlined, and that started with Nova.
The only unit of measurement that we seem to have solidified is Vorns, which is 83 earth years (earth years=stellar cycle). The calendar’s cycles are measured by vorn, the first number counts vorn, and every 24 vorn the second number ticks up. after 24th cycle 12 it would become 1st cycle 013 and then 2nd cycle 013.
There…actually is no unit of time for the second measurement as far as I can tell, so I have no idea what to call it, but essentially you would say Megatron’s birthday as first cycle O’twelve, and people would know he was born 23904-ish years after Nova Prime’s calendar went in effect.
24 vorns is roughly 2000 years and every 500 dates on the calendar is roughly one million years.
I developed this calendar system based on the actual dates we do have in IDW1, I decided 24 vorns are when the calendar turns over because the war starts about a million years after Megatron’s birth and the canon dates for most of those events are in the 500s. I did have to ignore the single canon date set in the 51st cycle for this, but all the other dates are within the 1 to 14 range. And this is taking into consideration that the calendar probably reset some time under Zeta Prime (which is why the Battle of Sherma Bridge where Megatron and the newly anointed Optimus Prime allegedly duked it out for the first time happens in 2nd Cycle 087 even tho Megatron was beat up by Whirl in jail before the war in 4th Cycle 496). Some of the inconsistencies I also chalk up to some bots still using the old calendar. the only date I really cant figure out is 6th Cycle 356 being confirmed to be “half a million years ago” like?? Eh?? Ultra Magnus’ last fatality was pre earth pretty sure and that happened in the 3800’s (of nova’s calendar pretty sure). Maybe they missed a zero at the end of the date or something idk XD 3560 would make so much more sense for half a million years ago.
Also, 83 years is a long time and it does seem like they have smaller units of dating called chords and arcs but I just assume thats like days and months to us and I cant be bothered to figure it out. not enough info about it anyway. I’m sure one of those tracks stellar cycles and the other tracks cybertronian days.
i think the only other unit of time I've used is deca-cycles, just cuz I like how it sounds. a deca-cycle is about a month, or three weeks.
Megatron and Skywarp were constructed earlier on (012 and 023 respectivly), Thundercracker was constructed closer to when the matrix “ran dry” probably in the 100s, and Starscream was commissioned by Cryak at the end of the millenia, in the late 400s, after they’d stopped constructing seekers entirely. He must not have been more than a few vorns old when he met Thundercracker.
Starscream and Skyfire’s expedition would have taken them 40 on the calendar to get to earth, based on Skyfire’s shuttle speed. Starscream probably would have been able to make it back to cybertron a little bit faster.
I referenced this and this page of the wiki while working on this. Most of my worldbuilding is extrapolation from canon.
yes i did all this for one joke.
A few more timeline stuff: Megatron is about .7 million years older than Starscream, and Starscream is about half a million years older than the start of the war. The war lasted 3 million years before they crash landed on earth after which they went into stasis for one million years. Some time after they landed on earth, Shockwave successfully clones Sunstorm.
and in case you were wondering, sunny's serial code is referencing his Collector's Edition toy's ID number (089). SC stands for Seeker Class. they run out of glyphs slots after 999 so they sort them into batches. Sunny is the 089th frame built in batch 16. whether that means his frame was already built and left empty in storage somewhere and then repurposed by Shockwave, or Shockwave built him from scratch based on the blueprints and just continued the serial code sequence, I haven't decided. but either way, it means there was a finite number of seekers brought into the world and they dont even make up a whole united states city's worth of people. Lots of them are dead by now anyway. The whole cybertronian race is so small now they are all on first name bases with each other XD. But i digress, none of that has to do with time or calendar stuff, just thought it was fun.
thanks for asking!!
#transformers#transformers calendar#transformers worldbuilding#transformers units of time#transformers 2005 idw#transformers idw1
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Lucifers Fantasies, 2
Second publishing of things that Lucifer would do in bed, or what he fantasizes about, including kinks and his opinion on certain acts.
rating: 18, SMUT (surprise at the end!)
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Masturbation, isnt something he'd do very often. He hardly had time for carnal desires before you found him. He just doesn't seem like the type of demon to please himself a lot, being swamped with work he simply didn't have time to think about it. He found himself pent up with sexual aggression, which does not bode well for your ability to walk. Sometimes hed find his mind and his hands drifting off to other places, imagining you in your school uniform, taking it off slowly to reveal your body. And when he cums, he shoots ropes.
Lucifer found himself with a corruption kink, taking imense pleasure in taking somebodies virginity, or exposing them to some really sexual things. he likes to think about if he was your first time, he wondered if you even thought about things like sex or were you imagining getting fucked? the thoughts that gave him the biggest erection was you breaking under him, from pleasure. becoming a mess just from him, he loves that.
Marking you is his favorite thing to do, sucking on your neck to leave hickey after hickey, not just that though. Leaving bite marks on the inside of your thighs, scratches from his tightening grip when he cums in you. Demons have a heightened sense of smell, hearing and general ability, so its not surprising to hear that he loves to mark you with his scent, being nothing more than just his smell rubbing off on you during close quarters, the closer you've been the stronger the scent.
Something about breeding you makes Lucifers dick stand straight up, maybe its the image of you laying underneath him, panting, begging for more of his juices, or maybe its because he feels immense pride when his scent stinks to you like that. He cant help but smirk when his brothers glare at him, smelling him on you. Even if he cant actually get you pregnant, he still loves to cum inside you.
body worship is on Lucifers list of top kinks, He loves it when you get down on your knees to praise his cock, showering it with kisses and telling it how much you like it, but his interest doesn't stop there. He likes to worship your body as well, you're just as important to him and he believes you deserve the love and care. He'll spend hours worshipping your body, explaining why he loves each and every piece of you.
To his surprise, when you got injured and started crying a bit, it gave him a bit of a boner. The volnurability you exposed him too, the way your cheeks flushed with pink, your shaky voice. you didn't get seriously hurt, you only shed a few tears as the injury burned, you felt ok after a minute, but lucifer, Lucifer was not going to be ok. He imagined the face you just made being caused by him, not by pain, but from the sheer overstimulation and pleasure he wanted to inflict upon you. He would never seriously hurt you or anything, he just enjoys the idea of you shedding a tear from the sting of his spankings.
semi-clothed sex is one of the things Lucifer enjoys. It stirs something in him to see you half-clothed, bottomless in an oversized shirt, or only wearing a skirt and an open blouse. the appeal of only some of your intimate parts peeking out arouses him beyond control, He loves to see you in just underwear or just a single garment.
He would surprisingly enjoy semi-public sex, bending you over the student council board desk, groping you or fondling your private areas in class or pulling you aside for a heated make-out session in the janitor's closet.
he doesn't like it when you use toys, but can't deny the fact he gets excited when he thinks of you using one. One late night, when he was walking to the kitchen for a late-night snack, he stopped right outside your room. He always found himself stopping in front of your door at night, but this was different, he thought he heard a noise, a verberation through the wall that caught his attention. he stood there for a few moments, about to walk away he was stopped by the noise again, until he realized what was going on, behind that flimsy wooden door. You were touching yourself, and those were your moans. The moment he realized it, his dick sprung to life, immediately creating a tent inside his pants. He leaned forwards, hesitating before deciding, he peered through the slit between the door and the frame. Gaining a clear view to your bed he peeped on you, watching you touch yourself. it was so deviant, but he looked anyway, not being able to take his eyes off of you as you used a toy on yourself.
shower sex is something he enjoys thoroughly and frequently, dragging you into the bath or shower with him, washing your body for you and turning it into something else. Your phone buzzed, your ringtone chiming through your room.
"hello? Lucifer, whats up?" you rubbed your eyes, feeling a bit tired
"Come to my room, You said you wanted to join me the next time I bathed, didn't you?" he chuckled on the other end "hurry, or I'll change my mind." he said before he hung up the phone
blushing, you headed over to his room right away, not wanting to miss the opportunity to bathe with Lucifer. In the shower, He'd offer to wash you, and when you say yes, he uses his body wash instead of yours. He feels incredibly prideful when you get out of the shower smelling just like him, he'll invite you for a shower the next time you need one too.
Lucifer LOVES edging, he likes to see you break down from orgasm denial, begging him for release, pleading with him to let you cum. In this state, he knows that you'll do just about anything for him, which is part of the reason he loves it so much. He also likes to use it as punishment, taking pleasure in your whines and begs, telling you to apologize to him in the best ay you can.
SUPRIZE! Heres a gift, for you! I wonder whats he's doing under that desk :o Source: Deleted twitter user, I tried to find an uncensored version but I couldn't)
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#lucifer x reader#obey me luci x reader#obey me#obey me lucifer#obey me luficer#obey me shall we date#obey me mc#smut#obey me smut#obey me x reader#lucifer x mc#lucifer morningstar#lucifer smut
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#140
The hero rips the shop door clean off its hinges, and demands into the fleeing crowds, “Where’s the thief?”
People seem much too busy leaping out the way of the hero’s assault to answer him. He surveys the scattering crowds idly, waiting for his heroic senses to kick in and decide on someone amongst the masses. It does after a long second, locking in on someone darting for the back entrance, and the hero doesn’t waste time guessing whether his assumption is right.
The door batters off the wall loudly as the villain stumbles down the steps. Probably a favour to the shop—the hero’s already caused enough damage to the front door. He steps out as the villain runs across the car park. He just watches for a moment as he goes, humming a laugh as the man almost runs straight into one of the parked cars.
The hero isn’t in any rush. He always catches his prey. This may be the villain’s life on the line, but to the hero this is a simple game of cat and mouse.
He finally gives chase as the villain disappears around the corner. It’s not hard; the villain’s barely halfway down the road when the hero catches up to him. He cuts the thief off, bringing him to a skidding halt, but this isn’t capture to the villain—it won’t be until the hero has him practically unconscious, probably. The thief turns on his heel and leaps down a side-alley.
The hero always found it funny that these fiends still try to escape him, even after his reputation started to get around—he always catches criminals, and it’s always worse for those who think they can get away.
Clearly this one hasn’t heard the stories. The hero blocks his escape, grabbing onto his shirt so he doesn’t try doing a one-eighty again. The villain makes some noise that sounds a bit like, “Augh!”
“Nice try,” the hero snaps coldly. The villain looks terrified, for lack of a better word. “Now give me the stuff you’ve stolen.”
With shaking hands, the villain reaches into his coat. The hero tenses, prepared to snatch a weapon away, but after a moment of fumbling the villain presents him with a single apple.
“You should know better than to mess with a hero.” The hero tightens his hold on the other’s shirt. “Show me what you actually took.”
The villain pulls a pained face. “That- That’s it. That’s all I took. It was a grocery store, there wasn’t much else to take.”
He barks a laugh, once, awkward. The hero isn’t laughing. “They sent me after you for an apple.”
He can kind of see it now. His shirt is crumpled, his coat plain, his hair neat. The expression of a scared animal. The hero scowls—this isn’t a villain.
He gives the thief a shove, sending him stumbling back. He almost trips over a brick laying on the floor. The sight makes the hero feel even more tricked.
He holds his hand out expectantly. “Give me that.”
The civilian looks at the apple sitting in his palm. Then he sighs and puts it in the hero's expectant hold.
“There’s nearly no money going into this city,” he comments as the hero takes a bite. “None of us normal people can afford anything.”
“Get a better job then.”
“Not all of us can be heroes.”
The hero glances at him. It sounds like it’s bordering an insult but the man isn’t looking at him, so he simply hums in disinterest before heading back to the shop.
“Thank you!” the shopkeeper cries when the hero appears in the doorway. “Did you catch the thief?”
The hero takes another bite of his apple. “No,” he says flatly. “What’d he take?”
“Basically my whole shop!” The shopkeeper gestures vaguely to the shop behind her, which frankly looks more ransacked by the hero’s entrance than an actual thief. “He’s probably taken half my profits for this month with him.”
The hero nods idly. He’s only half listening—he’s busy reining in his annoyance. “Sorry he got away, then.” The apple crunches loudly into the following silence. “Better luck next time.”
“Thank you for trying. I’ve no doubt he’ll be back—I’ll call you then!”
The shopkeeper shouts that last part, since the hero’s already checked out of the conversation and is making his way to the shattered front door.
He can’t believe he got called out here for this. These common shop owners don’t seem to remember that heroes have better things to be doing than chasing petty thieves. He wrecks the last standing glass panel on his way out to make the point.
#creative writing#writblr#writers on tumblr#writing#writing community#heroes and villains#hero x villain#happy monday yalllllllll#(i say this from the throes of monday)
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My place, your place, our place
@bucktommyfluffebruary day 9: moving in together | rated: g | wc: 666 | ao3 Buck gets ready to leave the loft for the final time
It had been a long day. Week. Weeks. For such a small space, the loft had been something of a nightmare to pack up for the move. All of his belongings seemed to multiply, needing far more boxes to pack everything into than he had been expecting. Every time he had thought he was done with an area, he would turn around and find more stuff to pack.
He could have sworn it hadn't been that difficult to move in, but then he remembered it was very different circumstances. He'd never had a place of his own before the loft. Hadn't really had stable housing from when he'd left home. Years of being on the road, sometimes in the jeep, sometimes in a motel, or in a house share with people he didn't know. Occasionally in provided accommodation like when he worked on the ranch, or when he tried out for the SEALs. It taught him to live light, consolidating most of his belongings into a pair of gym bags. Even for his first years in LA, first in the frat house with Connor and the guys, then Abby's place. Then crashing on Chimney's couch before moving on to Maddie's place. It never made sense to have much stuff.
But the loft was his space. He didn't need to be so strict about living light. He could buy things just because and not have to worry about it taking up space. He could do what he wanted to make the space feel like home.
Now, everything was boxed up. Most of it had already been moved to Tommy's, now their, place. Just the last few boxes to take out, before doing the final sweep. And final final sweep. Then it would be time for him to turn in his keys at the leasing office. And that would be the chapter of his life at the loft over.
It was kind of bittersweet. Giving up the first place he'd been able to call his own. Leaving behind the place where so many memories had been made over six years he'd lived there. Some good, some bad, some just neutral. A space where he'd fallen in and out of love. Where he'd recovered from the worst injuries the job could throw at him. Where he'd watched Jee grow up, one babysitting session at a time. A place that had seen just about every emotion he could ever experience, happiness, anger, depression, joy, fear.
He and Tommy did the final walk through together, checking every closet, every shelf. Every nook and cranny for anything he might have missed. Closing the door for the last time felt far heavier than it should.
"Are you okay?" Tommy asked as Buck locked up.
"Yeah. It's just. I'm gonna miss this place." Buck replied. "This is the longest I've live somewhere since the house I grew up in."
"You did make a lot of memories here. We made a lot of memories here."
Tommy coming over to clear the air about Eddie, then making a move on Buck, completely turning his worldview on it's head. Eddie telling Buck to call Tommy after that disastrous first date. Bringing him home after Maddie and Chimney's wedding, Tommy being half asleep against his shoulder still in his turnouts. So many dates. Tommy staying to take care of him after he dislocated his shoulder. The break up. Tommy coming over to apologize only for it to turn into them shouting at each other, getting out all of the pent up emotions, followed by them sitting down and having an actual adult talk about everything, and deciding to try again, slower this time. The first 'I love you'. Tommy asking him to move into his place when he saw the letter that had come through about renewing the lease.
"We did. Let's go make even more in our house." Buck held his hand out to Tommy and they walked away from the loft together for the final time.
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Domesticity and Other Distractions: Hound x Reader fic (PART 3)
|| Another short one, but the next part will be longer and focus on how friendship turned into romantic inclinations for reader and Hound. I really do love that mech lol ||
p fluffy under the cut
mentions of a sucky ex
“Looks cozy,” Hound takes a moment to step inside where the carpet sinks beneath him. It’s like walking around in a meadow after a fresh rain and the earth is soft and malleable. He moves through the space and inspects every inch he can and just finds more and more things that fit your personality. The little trinkets that line your bookshelf, the wall art and posters, the color of the curtains and the things that hang from the ceiling. All of it is so undeniably you and he can’t get enough of this place, so alien and yet so like his own space. A thought flashes in his processor: would a house with you look like this too? How would your stuff and his stuff look sitting on the shelf side-by-side? Would fresh flowers be something you’d be interested in keeping in the kitchen or in the living room? Well damn, maybe he should just ask you to move in? You’d never have to clean up after others, you’d have more space for all your stuff, and the two of you could spend so much more time together!
But he couldn’t ask that of you. The two of you have only really been serious for a couple months now and have barely graduated past kissing and hugging, and even all of that is so sparse with him being a scout. Plus, it’d be much too dangerous for you to just waltz around the base where any bot could accidentally squish you. Maybe he’s crazy for wanting that with you, at least so early on. Best let you take care of the pacing. Whatever you decide is fine with him as long as you’re together.
Hound turns back to you and sees you folding down the bedding and fluffing the squishy pillows at the top. He knows that being in this holomatter body isn’t the most ideal, and it can be a bit tedious to pilot, but he’s thankful for the ability since it’s likely his actual body, even with mass displacement, would crush the little berth you sleep in. He makes his way over and helps himself to climbing into it with you, careful to get rid of the boots on his avatar. When he first laid with you on the couch you made mention that putting feet coverings on furniture was frowned upon and even seen as disrespectful to some. Since then, he does his best to make sure to keep his off of anything even remotely furniture like, especially the soft kind.
As he lays beside you a sense of peace washes over him, and the moment is only enhanced when you cuddle up next to his side in the crook of his arm. You drape a hand over his chest and a leg over his hip to snuggle deeper into the blankets.
You can’t remember the last time you’ve laid with someone like this. Your last relationship wasn’t much of a cuddler and seemed to always have “something come up” when you’d brought up the idea of staying over.
They hardly seemed to give you the time of day when it was something you wanted, but when they wanted something, it was all sorts of important. It never mattered if you were busy or your plans conflicted with theirs, if they wanted something they did their best to get it. Guilt tripping was their favorite thing to do, almost a second hobby to them, and ‘If you love me’ was a popular staple in their vocabulary. You never told Hound about them. It would be too upsetting for you to talk about anyway, and you doubt he’d want to hear about why you were so hesitant to let him in when you two first started this relationship.
You’d known Hound for a good year and a half before either of you made any sort of movement towards the romantic, and that first moment you realized he cared like that terrified you.
#maccadam#mtmte#mtmte x reader#transformers#tf mtmte#tf x reader#g1 hound x reader#g1 hound#transformers hound#tf idw hound#idw hound x reader#tf idw hound x reader#idw hound#mtmte hound#mtmte hound x reader#tf mtmte x reader#transformers hound x reader#transformers x reader#tf g1#tf g1 hound
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Uh Oh! You have activated my Ramble (c)
The gist for my daydream of Swan Lake (as it would be via shouldering out "The Frog Prince") is that
Tiana/Odette does make a deal with Facilier/Rothbart, but not in the sense of "I'll get you your restaurant!" but in the sense of her actually being new in the area, not realizing what he is/does. All he tells her is that he can, "Arrange a meeting with some powerful Folks around here. I'm no businessman myself, just a man with friends..." Et cetera. Enough patter to make her agree to 'meet' those friends and shake hands on it--cue the swan curse and her being trapped with her fellow cygnets on the water. Why?
Facilier's Friends are counting down the days until he pays off a 'debt' of young women (imprisoned via his magic until the big date) for a favor he made years ago...
...to save Odile's life as a child. Yeah, yeah, anti-villain route, I know. Stay with me. Basically, this version of Rothbart didn't pull a spell to make Odile a lookalike; it was just a 'Prince and the Pauper convenient doppelganger' coincidence. It'll come into play with the Naveen-Siegfried thing, but anyway. Odile. Kid. Either dead or dying. Rothbart-Facilier pleads with his Friends to save her, a Friend obliges. And then demands payment in the form of receiving her as recompense (gross arranged bride coding) when she comes of age; her eighteenth birthday. Facilier pleads anew, haggling to save her.
Cue Friend and company demanding quantity in exchange. A flock of pretty cygnet maidens to trade for his daughter by the appointed hour. He agrees. And Odettiana's resemblance to Odile is what makes him fixate on her specifically as a perfect finishing touch to the trade.
Then there'd be the requisite tangle of Odile and Odette meeting, Glam Goth Voodoo Flapper meets Hardworking Would-Be Entrepreneur trying to establish herself. They contrast, but bond. And, of course, Siegfried is thrown in there as the heartthrob. The whole 'confessing true love' shtick still applies, which would endanger Odette's status as the final sacrifice, so Facilier encourages Odile to ~steal her man~ (and unknowingly doom Odette and the other girls who she has no idea even exist; ever since the Friends saved her, Facilier's forbidden her to go near the water where they're trapped)
There's a whole angsty blow-up at the climax, all the different loves clashing together Romance (Siegfried and Odette) Friendship (Odile and Odette and the cygnets) and Familial (Odile: "You can't do this to them!" Facilier, hoarse: "BETTER THEM THAN YOU!")
Wheeeeeee
At risk of sounding like a complete dingus about something you're clearly very passionate about, I think this idea is neat... but I personally wouldn't replace the original movie with this concept. My judgement is defo extremely skewed by nostalgia (though, I still take issue with aspects of TPaTF. for example: Disney's inability to have a Black protagonist be Black for more than half of the film TWICE NOW). Still, the recharacterization of Tiana as a naïve newcomer wouldn't be my thing personally. I'd like it better as its own separate film. We do need more than a singular Black Disney Princess after all.
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homelander x oc
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summary: Mia gets insecure when Stormfront joins the Seven. Logically, her solution to get over it is to ride Homelander during a Seven meeting. Written for Cozy Corner Kinktober prompts role reversal + exhibitionism
(18+, riding, jealousy, exhibitionism, rare me writing bottom & sublander)
wc: 959
author’s note: a very normal couple who works out their problems in a very normal way
Mia wasn’t usually a jealous person.
She couldn’t really afford to be, not when her boyfriend was the most famous man in America. Millions of fans wanting to be with him and countless fanfictions written on Tumblr (for her own sanity, she finally had to delete that Godforsaken app after over half a decade of use).
It was unfair, in a way. Homelander could kill anyone who - in his opinion, anyways - gave her a flirtatious look (which more often than not was nothing but a friendly smile) and she would have to live with that guilt forever, but she couldn’t even glare at his fans that tried to get a little too close to him. Not that Homelander ever let her out in the public eye that much to begin with anyways - for her own safety, he had told her. She had given up trying to argue with him on that a long time ago.
But it was fine. She didn’t have to see anything unless it was on TV or something. At least at Vought nobody tried to get handsy with him.
Until Stan Edgar decided to recruit her.
Why Edgar thought recruiting Stormfront to join the Seven was a good idea, Mia would never know. She didn’t really care to know either. All she knew was that she hated the way she looked at Homelander. Like she’d devour him if given the chance.
Mia didn’t even know why she’s so insecure. Why when Stormfront was around, she leaned into Homelander’s side a bit more, ramped up the PDA between them that definitely went beyond what was allowed (but it’s not like HR would ever dare tell to Homelander that he wasn’t allowed to touch his girlfriend however he wanted whenever or wherever he wanted).
And Homelander had made it more than clear that he didn’t like Stormfront in any capacity - not even as a coworker or teammate.
When Mia had spoken with him about it and anxiously played with her ring, looking like she was unsure whether to believe him or not, Homelander had done his best to reassure her that she had nothing to worry about by fucking her from sunset to the sunrise and making her come more times than she could count.
But still, a voice inside her head argued, Stormfront’s a supe. You're just a regular, normal human woman. Nothing special. Wouldn’t it make sense for a God to want someone more on his level? You’re expendable.
Insecurities and the things she would do to overcome said insecurities are funny, in a twisted way. She could handle the kisses on the mouth, Homelander subtly grabbing her ass at some stupid Vought party they were forced to attend, and she had stopped bothering to try to hide the hickeys that Homelander littered on her neck. But she had always drawn the line when he wanted her to actually fuck somewhere in front of other people.
And yet, here she was this morning, shamelessly riding him during the typical Seven meeting. A-Train and Starlight both stared either at the table or at the wall like they wanted to be anywhere else, Maeve was more annoyed than anything, Black Noir just sat there, the Deep was thankfully away in Ohio, and Stormfront…
Stormfront tried to look unbothered, but Mia could see the way her eye twitched whenever she glanced at the two of them.
Mia greedily kissed Homelander as she moved her hips against his. Homelander kissed back with just as much desperation, only pulling back to allow Mia a breath of air, a trail of salvia connecting them. She heard A-Train mumbled a “gross”, which caused Homelander to snap at the members of the Seven to mind their own fucking business and to continue the meeting.
He gripped Mia’s hips (no doubt accidentally leaving a new set of bruises in the shape of his hand on her delicate skin) as he moaned needily.
“Fuck,” he groaned, leaning his head back against his chair. Mia wasn’t usually on top of in charge when they had sex - and she preferred it that way, truth be told - but when she was, he was so needy. All for her - just her. “Fuck!”
In the moment, Mia wasn’t sure why she ever felt insecure. Homelander had said it before - they were made for each other. Two needy, desperate individuals who just wanted to be loved. And despite everything Homelander had done, Mia never left him. She still loved him. And he loved her, the best way he could.
“Come on, babe,” she murmured in his ear, nipping it playfully, and then pulled back to look him in the eyes, “I love you.”
That did it for him.
Homelander moaned as he spilled inside her, his face buried in the crook of her neck. Mia panted, stroking his hair. She got him to thrust upwards a few more times, getting her to orgasm as well.
“...love you too…” he murmured.
Mia smiled, kissing the top of his head. She looked to the side at Stormfront who was barely concealing a glare in their direction. Mia gave her a smile far too sweet to be genuine.
Mia removed herself from her straddling position on Homelander, who whined at the absence of her warmth. She just turned herself around so she was sitting on his lap, facing the table and grabbing her tablet that had her notes she usually took during the meetings on it. Homelander wrapped his arms around her waist, nuzzling his cheek against hers.
“So…” she said nonchalantly, making herself comfortable in Homelander’s lap and arms, “what were we talking about?”
#homelander fanfiction#homelander x oc#my writing#mialander#mialore#‘role reversal’ as in mia takes the lead and not homie lol
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Oh boy, now that I'm done with the rewatch it's time to air out some of the grievances I have with the writing choices made regarding the antagonists...
Starting off a little more positive – Merlin's portrayal worked fairly well overall as this arrogant manipulative old jerk of a wizard, who may have noble goals but achieves them via not so honorable methods in the name of the greater good.
It was a pretty good bait-and-switch with the way the show had built up this image of the mysterious and benevolent mage, but left enough hints to his true character via little details that quickly turn sour in hindsight once you've actually met him. He's not a villain, but they did make him a decent morally gray character in the few episodes he's around.
However, I think he should've been held more accountable for his actions and behavior, especially when his grand plan doesn't work out because he was too wrapped up in his own head to see the truth.
That leads me to Morgana, the big evil "mastermind" of the show. I have to say, I love how utterly unhinged they made her in the first half of season 3, though she loses some of that by the end of it. I don't really have many complaints about her as a villain, but rather like to nitpick aspects surrounding her character and some missed potential.
Design-wise I find her a little lackluster as someone called "the Eldritch Queen" and while it definitely was a fun idea to contrast Merlin's dark armor with all that gold, I believe they missed the mark a little. They should've gone a step further and contrasted the design even more by giving it a creepy and organic direction. Her "armor" could've been more insectoid and reminiscent of bones or dead wood.
Also, a small thing that always bothers me are the green accents on her, when that was being established as Merlin's color. It does connect them visually in a way, but mostly just feels out of place to me. Now, about that missed potential...
As a queen of shadows, I would've liked if they'd played up her insidious nature a little more. As Claire, instead of immediately trying (and badly failing) to kill the Trollhunter, they should've dragged out the possession a little. She could've used this position to destroy the team from within, test their limits, tear them apart to weaken their will, only to have it all backfire with how much they trust and care for each other. It would've paralleled Angor's approach, because considering his background, he must've picked up these methods from someone, no?
Another writing point that bothers me is her imprisonment. No matter how you look at it, sealing an ancient evil sorceress inside (or even near) the heartstone – a MAJOR source of pure energy – just sounds like an all around bad idea. Wouldn't it make sense for her to feed on that energy? And even if not that, shouldn't you be worried about her corrupting it??
I get that from an animation standpoint it's an extremely convenient way to have everything happening in one place, so you don't actually have to set up so many new assets, but man... it's just kind of stupid lol.
Honestly the way I would've rationalized this whole deal is: instead of having her sealed up in Arcadia Oaks, California of all places (why did they even end up there?) she could've been imprisoned within the previous Trollmarket in europe. Her and Gunmar have tried to bring about the Eternal Night before and almost succeeded, which led to the battle of Killahead, where both were sealed away.
Imagine Gunmar and his forces had taken the old Trollmarket and used its heartstone for that spell, draining it in the process. Although they were stopped and defeated, Trollmarket was destroyed and their rock of sustenance dead, which would prompt the trolls to leave and seek a new home across the globe.
Merlin could've trapped Morgana in the empty heartstone as a way to contain her powers, using the last of his magic. Maybe the reason he was so sure she would be weak and easy to vanquish after her imprisonment is because he had intended to slowly syphon her energy to empower himself and never considered that she would figure out how to reverse the spell to drain him instead.
And to add some flavor to this location, Morgana's presence could've twisted the old Trollmarket into something eery and barely recognizable, giving others reason to avoid this place. It could've served to show the heroes what may become of their beloved Trollmarket if Gunmar wins, given them more incentive to fight for what they have.
That's just an idea though.
Angor Rot was always a big pot of missed potential to me and his return in season 3 just ended up feeling, well, hollow lol. He was introduced as a great antagonist but in my honest opinion kinda fell off the moment they destroyed his soul and just turned him into an angry beast. Besides the overall bad taste it leaves behind, we really didn't need a Bular 2. And it's a little annoying they somewhat continued with that direction even when he was revived and supposedly got his soul back.
I like that they cared enough to dig a little into his conflicting emotions given his history & enslavement, but these moments should've been brought up in the climax of the first season. He should've regained his soul back then and suddenly be forced to reconcile with the atrocities committed in the name of his mistress. His revenge on Strickler should've conflicted with his newly regained conscience...
And, oh man, Strickler is a bit of an annoying case. It's kind of absurd to me that they would choose to give this man an easy "redemption" while tossing around Angor's corpse like that.
Angor Rot literally had his soul and autonomy taken from him and while these actions definitely twisted him throughout the ages, at the end of the day it was never his choice. Strickler was in a somewhat similar situation as a changeling made to serve Gunmar, but the major difference is that he did have a choice. Multiple even.
Even in his predicament, Angor chose to offer the Trollhunter a deal to free both of them of Strickler's control. Whether he actually would've honored that deal is hard to say, but I think even if he'd betrayed Jim's trust, it would've made for a good opportunity to speak of who he used to be and what he's become, and have his first real choice in centuries be to spare them.
Strickler on the other hand is far more vile and self-serving at his core. At first you could argue that it's mostly the (very real) threat of Bular breathing down his neck that pushes him to harm Jim despite his soft spot for the kid. But when both Bular and Gunmar are out of the picture, instead of using this freedom constructively, he doubles down on killing the Trollhunter while finding every opportunity to get under his skin.
This man literally chooses to continue beefing with a teenager and don't get me wrong, I love it. Comedy aside, it is genuinely a fun exploration of his character and what makes him work as a complex personal antagonist. But the fun quickly stops when they try to rush him into a lackluster "redemption arc" to get him on the main team.
I'm aware that tons of people love the stricklake pairing and "lady x monster man" is very much a del Toro staple, but I really don't think Strickler should've been "redeemed" given everything he did, there should've been FAR more serious repercussions. It would've made more sense to me to put him in a "reluctant, not entirely trustworthy, sort-of-ally" position than suddenly have him be one of the Good Guys because... romance?
Not to mention the quality of their writing and characterization took quite a dip to mend their relationship and make said last minute romance happen. The drama surrounding it was cheesed up to such a degree it felt like they were putting on a play and didn't tell anyone.
Nomura's turnaround makes perfect sense narratively speaking because she was a straight-forward, impersonal antagonist, who only began to sympathize with the enemy when they were forced into the same position and she had nothing left to lose. She probably gave Jim a few nightmares, but the Lakes don't have anywhere near the number of reasons to hate her as they should with Strickler.
Oh and on the topic of changelings, let's get to the Janus Order. In my honest opinion, I think the Order was an overall waste. What made the changelings fun to me was precisely how they jumped between playing human and the cruel brutality of their monstrous nature. They weren't really a blend of these two worlds, but rather just putting on an act.
That's what made examples like Strickler, Nomura, and NotEnrique emotionally toeing the line of what it means to be human so interesting. Because they aren't human, but have learned to love the world they live in. And it's also what would've made Jim's transformation so strange/special, because he actually would've embodied joining those worlds.
The Janus Order both visually and narratively throws a wrench into that for no reason. (And don't get me started on the whole "evil, politically powerful organization secretly controlling the world" deal..........)
The way I could actually see a point to that direction, is if it had been a relatively inconsequential side-plot where the Janus Order is more like a small-scale cult of humans or even low-grade sorcerers worshipping the Pale Lady. It could've been a one or two episode issue that would've mainly served to build up some lore & foreshadowing surrounding Morgana, before she would've made her big entrance in the third season.
Ah... and even Gunmar could've been handled much better in the later seasons. Bular isn't a perfect character, but he serves his purpose as the introductory villain fairly well and for a kids show like that, it's a sensible execution.
Gunmar's character started out very strong – as the presumed endboss, they combined Bular's intimidation factor and Strickler's conniving nature with him and added some class as a millennia old monster warlord. It works fantastically. While that image falls a little here and there, his portrayal in the Darklands still makes sense as someone who seemingly lost all hope and resigned himself to his eternal prison... and even then he displayed a malicious sort of patience by wanting to break Jim's spirit instead of simply killing him.
So for that to quickly turn into an impatient old man, who just barks out threats and orders and blindly follows whatever anyone tells him the moment he's on the surface... it, well, is pretty disappointing. It's understandable for Bular, the younger and less experienced son, to be rash and impatient, but a warlord? That's a position that requires a ton of patience and tactical prowess.
I really wish they would've kept the way he was presented in the first season and give us this big villain who's not only physically scary, but observational and dedicated enough to send Chompsky back with a message saying he'll kill all those Jim holds dear for killing his son and then listing literally everyone the kid knows.
Plus, his origin as some kind of actual monster born from a corrupted heartstone should've been explored! They could've gone into that endless hunger he apparently displays, that would've made him consume countless living creatures and even drain the magic energy out of crystals...
Instead we ended up with Bular 2 again, but even worse somehow, and it just made Gunmar about as threatening as a parked truck.
#sigh. there's more that could be said about some of the lesser antagonists like usurna & co. but most of those are fine for their roles tbh#trollhunters#tales of arcadia#toa merlin#toa morgana#angor rot#walter strickler#zelda nomura#gunmar#[spongebob stopping falling truck meme] these are just my personal thoughts!!!!! it's fine if you disagree!!!!!!!!!!!#entries
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I like bloodweave. Okay. But I DON'T like the version of them in fanfic where Astarion is a dick and Gale is like. Whining and pleading for him to be emotionally vulnerable (or just. Nice to him) prior to the relationship being established. Because that is just not accurate. Gale needs the player to express interest in him during his weave-teaching scene before he even considers hitting on them properly. Gale is entirely resigned to his fate and needs someone else to pull him away from it. Gale only starts being sweet and romantic and devoted after you accept his love confession and give him hope for the future. Gale says fuck all and then slinks away to cry privately if you break up with him.
Like he isn't chasing after people lmao. He isn't dropping to his knees and crying about anything much less this dickhead he met a week ago. He is overwhelmingly passive about literally everything personal to him up to and including his own death (provided there are no casualties/there is a good reason) until after the player expresses that they care about him. Astarion is not doing that in any of these fics.
Like Gale is friendly and a dork and doesn't wanna get murdered but he fully has a suicide plan. He thought the artefacts would help him survive but he didn't believe he'd ever truly live again. If Gale confessed and Astarion said/did like one (1) mean thing afterward Gale's romance is closed off forever. He's wandering into the forest to cry. He's killing himself immediately. His fragile ego and self worth can't take it. You have to understand that when we joke about him being pathetic it's not bc he's like. Sopping wet and chasing people down and begging for a scrap of attention. It's because he craves affection but would literally rather die than ask or even hope for it until someone else forces that hope back into his serotonin-deficient tadpole brain.
#i feel like u can tell when a bloodweave fic is written by an astarion stan vs a gale stan lol#because the astarion stans are just using gale as a vessel for like. their sopping wet meow meow#who screams and cries until astarion becomes emotionally vulnerable with them#which gale would not do. realistic bloodweave is astarion tries to fuck him in act 1 and he refuses because of the orb#and then astarion is like “boo what the fuck. change of plans” and gale is like “okay” and they never speak of it again lol#anyway#please god the gale characterisation in this place. half of you make him the soppiest most pathetic loser and the other half make him evil#he's not ACTUALLY a loser. when i joke about it the reason its funny is because its not true#hes just a regular guy with depression lol. hes not out here debasing himself begging for some old twink to care abt him#bg3#gale dekarios#bloodweave#gale of waterdeep#does this make sense. i havent slept#i just mean that if you want gale to be sappy he needs to have like. prior assurance that his feelings are reciprocated#because if he doesnt have that and astarion is a dick to him he WILL just give up on the relationship#like hes not hunting people down after they deliberately upset him. i see so many fics where they create tension by lime#*like#having astarion openly fuck someone else after establishing a sort-of relationship with gale. for the drama#like hey. gale fully dumps you if you do that in game!! you have no way to convince him not to. he will dump astarion for that permanently
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