#but the good news is that i have never wanted to be fun by those standards so i'm okay with that

[hollowtones]

my month-late PAX West post (& a catalogue of some things I saw and did and bought in September / late August)

PAX West was very fun this year. It was my first ever PAX and it was my first convention at all in maybe a decade. Any excuse to see friends is a good one & I love hanging out with the RTVS crew whenever I have the time and money to travel. ^_^ I even got to see some friends I've never seen in person before!!! (Thank you to Jill and Evan for the "Petal Crash" pin & thank you to Taxi for stealing my name tag by accident.)

I am very shy, and I have very severe social anxiety that causes me a lot of problems in my day-to-day life, so I almost didn't go to the RTVS meetup. People there were very sweet, though, so I'm glad I did. It feels very heartening to have people come up to you and tell you what the things you've made have meant to them. It was very hard to not cry. LOL

If you stopped by to say hi, thank you very much. I've been thinking about it through all of September and smiling a lot about it. ^_^

The rest of this post is largely pics of things Puzz and I picked up for ourselves. (And a little bit of talking about some other things we did.) I thought it would be fun to catalogue them. I tend to be a little thrifty, so I got to splurge on my wife. LOL

These were mostly things we got for Puzz because I didn't want to worry about lugging things home in a suitcase. But she keeps telling me they're our things, which makes me smile every time I think about it. Some of the pins are for me. I'd like to put them on my backpack... Hopefully they don't fall off. Jackie and Dodogama are friends.

The "Chicory" bag is a bit of a funny story. Puzz and I saw the "Beastieball" booth in the corner of the indie section. Very fun demo. Very cute booth. They have cool merch! I thought I saw Lena Raine working the booth, and I got really shy & nervous about making a poor impression, so I just kind of hid behind my partner. (I wish I had said hi, in retrospect... but we live and we learn...) So we just kind of shuffle off to the merch desk and talk to a very nice man there while we pick up some things. I work up the guts to say that I really like these games and that they mean a lot to me!! The guy says, well thank you, that means a lot to me and the team. Wow! Real swell guy, I'm thinking to myself. A day or two later Puzz and I are out to lunch with some friends and I just suddenly go eyes wide & mouth agape because I put two and two together in my head and realize Oh holy shit that was Greg Lobanov wasn't it. LOL

Puzz found a cheap copy of "999: 9 Hours, 9 Persons, 9 Doors" for the DS at a retro game store's pop-up. They also had "A Bug's Life" for Game Boy Colour and a strategy guide for "Gex 3", both of which I wish I had picked up.

Mr. Basculin was a gift from Jake. Good news! Mr. Basculin is still alive.

This is all stuff that was given to me as gifts. (Aside from the con badges. They make you pay for those.) You've probably already seen the Bibi that Jake made me. "Chicken Run" was also from him. "Zapper" was from Puzz and the Gumby game (& the Bad Boe sticker) was from Scorpy. These games fuckin suck asshole!!!!!!!!! I'm obsessed with them & I'll cherish them forever. I also got a little rock and a human dog keychain.

I think Scorpy said a fan gave this to him at PAX East to pass to me eventually. I'm having a hard time reading the @ on it, but on the off-chance you see this: thank you so much. Every time I think about it I get a little teary-eyed. I want to get myself a little picture frame for it. (This is the first time someone's given me fanart like this before, and it made me very emotional. LOL)

Puzz and I only got 2-day passes for PAX, so we spent the rest of our time in Seattle hanging out with friends and seeing the sights. I don't feel like digging all the photos out right now, but we went to a really fucking nice jazz club (Dimitriou's Jazz Alley - great ambience, really good food, we saw Keiko Matsui live which was life-changing), we visited MoPOP (I hadn't been in years! It was alright! Puzz had some capital-t Thoughts about the whole place which was fun to listen to!), we rode the trains, I got a big bag of Dicks, we walked around downtown. There was this really nice coffee shop that I keep having dreams about, so I hope I can go back to Seattle soon. (Or at least eventually, next year.) Then we went to Portland for a day to say hi to a friend because the state was nearby.

Then we went back to Puzz's place in California. Then there was a major heatwave & a bunch of wildfires nearby... So we didn't have the chance to get out much in September. But that's okay. We've both been tired lately & I think we both badly needed some dedicated Not Doing Things time. It's just a shame that it was enforced by Dangerous Weather Conditions.

We got to visit some local friends and I got to try out more Bog-Standard Mediocre American Food. (Dunkin Donuts is just Tim Hortons. Olive Garden is kind of scary but the salad was really good and the breadsticks were fine. I had a middling hamburger from Jack In The Box tonight. Their milkshake was very good. I'm sure I'm forgetting others.) I went to a Macy's for the first time and the layout of the store made me have a panic attack. We went for nice walks and saw lots of nice critters and plants. I got to swim! I watched a mediocre PlayStation presentation! I turned 30 years old! Puzz took me to a very fancy and really nice Italian place for my birthday, in case you were worried that I was only eating garbage here. LOL

We got a lot of books.

Maybe too many. Also a Miles Davis vinyl for myself & some Gunpla as an early birthday gift for Puzz. And also the cookbook was a gift from family. But I'm very excited to tuck into more of these, hopefully soon. Some were for me and some were for Puzz but knowing us we're going to go "hey, I liked this one, you check it out" or "hey, I didn't like this one, but maybe you will" for a lot of them. I'm gonna start with "Annihilation" and the game essays book. ("House of Leaves" is a second copy for us, because my copy was originally Puzz's and I wanted them to be able to read it too.) I don't have room in my bags for much more than what I came here with, so we're gonna ship some of the books to each other when we're done reading.

It's been a very nice month... I feel very thankful to have a life full of love like this. I don't think I have anything else to add to this post! Thanks for reading.

[scary-grace]

camera shy - a Shigaraki x f!Reader fic

You're a villain who likes catching heroes in compromising positions, and when you can't do that, you put them there yourself. It's not until you capture Tenko Shimura that you lose the upper hand. (All Might rescues Tenko AU, pro hero!Tenko, villain!reader, 2k words. Suggestive if you squint.)

There’s nothing pro heroes care about more than their image, so in your opinion, they were just asking for a villain like you. Somebody has to show the public what the heroes are really like underneath, after all, and you’ve got a flair for the dramatic, so why shouldn’t it be you? All it really takes is a little research, a little luck, a decent video camera or two, and a hell of a lot of rope.

It’s not the heroes with the skeletons in their closets who interest you. Somebody like Endeavor, who’s been at the center of scandal after scandal, has nothing new to say. You like a hero who still has a secret or two, a hero who’s a real challenge to capture long enough for a good confession cam. With those criteria in mind, it really was inevitable that you’d go after newly minted pro hero Tenko Shimura.

You have to hand it to Tenko – he was hard to catch. You knew he’d be hard to catch, given his quirk, but that was what made catching him so much fun. You caught one of his hands first, then trapped the other while he was still trying to figure out what was going on, and then you went to work. Now you have his hands tied above his head, fingers splayed apart so he can’t bring them together or touch anything else. With other heroes, you’ve done some fancy rope-work to jazz up the shot, but you don’t think you need that here. Tenko looks pretty good just like this.

Tenko Shimura watches you through narrowed red eyes as you adjust the camera angles. “Are we shooting a porno or something here?”

“Careful what you say, hero. This is all B-roll,” you say, and Tenko blanches. “I’m kidding. Loosen up.”

“Loosen up. Right.” Tenko rolls his wrists, but you’re confident in your knots, and they hold. “Seriously. What am I doing here?”

“We’re just going to have a talk,” you say. Tenko’s eyes follow you from camera to camera. “You’ve seen my videos, right? Or at least you’ve seen the ones your friends were in.”

“Yeah.” A jagged smile crosses Tenko’s face. “I’ve seen what you did to them.”

“What I did to them?” you protest. “I was so nice to Spinner. We talked about video games. It was fun.”

“Yeah, and then the whole internet tore him up for being a geek.”

“Not the whole internet,” you disagree. The comments on your video were full of gamer girls jumping up and down to ask Spinner out, and you know that at least a few of them went so far as to shoot their shot. “That’s the problem with you heroes. Why do you need everybody to like you so bad?”

“I don’t need everybody to like me,” Tenko says. You raise your eyebrows. “If you wanted a hero who thinks it’s a popularity contest, you grabbed the wrong guy.”

“See, I think that means I picked the right guy.” You sit down cross-legged beside the main camera, ready to adjust it if needed but well out of the shot. “The heroes who care about the rankings, they never say anything interesting. But you, Tenko Shimura – I bet you have some really interesting things to say.”

“Maybe you’re right.” Tenko rolls his wrists again. “The thing is, Cam Girl –”

“Hey,” you protest. “That’s not my code name.”

“You don’t have a code name?”

“Yeah, because it’s not about me,” you say. Cam Girl. God. “You’re deflecting.”

“So are you,” Tenko says. He tilts his head, studying you. “If you don’t want to be Cam Girl, come up with a better name.”

“What, like you did?” you challenge. “You know how many heroes use their full names? Kamui Woods and you. Is that really a club you want to be in?”

“If the other option is the can’t-make-up-a-name hide-behind-a-camera brigade, yeah,” Tenko says. It’s quiet for a second or two. “You take a lot of risks pulling jobs like this, don’t you? Kidnapping people and holding them in place for hours – either you’re really good, or you’ve got blackmail material on somebody important.”

“I can neither confirm nor deny,” you say, and smirk. “Impressed?”

Tenko shakes his head, which annoys you. He’s tied up in your makeshift lair. He should be impressed. “I can’t figure out why a villain gutsy enough to kidnap heroes is too chicken to get in front of the camera.”

“I run the show. I’m not the show. That’s – are you making chicken noises at me?” You’re losing control of this interview. You need to get it back, effective immediately. “Animal noises. Is that one of your special talents? Do an elephant sound next.”

“No animal sounds. And no more answers,” Tenko says. The smirk on his face says he’s got you right where he wants you, in spite of the fact that you’re in charge. You feel a brief but powerful urge to knock him out. “Unless you get in here with me.”

“What?”

“I’ll answer your questions,” Tenko says, “but you have to sit here with me and answer mine. On camera.”

“If I show my face on camera, this will be my last interview,” you say. “I still have lots of heroes who need a close-up.”

“Damn, I thought I was your one and only.”

“The only one tied down here is you,” you say. How bad do you want this particular interview? Pretty bad. Tenko Shimura’s the most interesting hero you’ve captured so far, and if all it takes to get him really talking is to put on some sunglasses and a surgical mask, it’s worth it. “Sit tight.”

You adjust the cameras to frame both of you, then sit down in the frame facing Tenko Shimura. “Nice disguise,” he says, “but I already saw your face.”

“No, you didn’t,” you say. “Think about it. Have any of the heroes I’ve interviewed been able to describe me afterward?”

Tenko doesn’t answer. “Here’s my first question. What’s your quirk?”

“You think I’ll tell you that?”

“If you want to know what my weakness is,” Tenko says. “Don’t you?”

No. You’re surprised by how quickly the answer occurs to you, and how strongly you feel about it. Your whole project is about exposing heroes’ secrets. It’s not about getting them killed, which is what you filming this and sharing it would be. “I don’t care about that,” you say. “I want to know what the worst part of being a hero is.”

“The worst part?”

“The worst part. Don’t tell me being a hero is just so plus ultra all the time.”

Tenko snorts. “You want me to say villains, right, Cam Girl? That’s the answer you want.”

“I want the truth,” you say. “And don’t call me Cam Girl.”

“The truth.” Tenko thinks about it. And keeps thinking about it, long enough for you to wonder if he’s trying to stall you. “The worst part about being a hero is that I can’t do it all the time.”

“Huh?”

“I can’t do it all the time. I don’t want to do it all the time,” Tenko says. You reach over and adjust the camera on the right. You need to zoom in. “It’s my job. It’s not everything about me. The whole work-life balance thing. You know, the thing All Might is really bad at.”

You’ve never heard a hero roast All Might like that. Then again, Tenko was All Might’s protégé before he turned pro, so he’s probably gotten a better look at all of All Might’s good and bad habits than anybody else. “So, All Might –”

“Let me finish, Cam Girl,” Tenko says. His expression is serious. “I don’t want to be a hero all the time. But I know what happens when heroes are looking the other way. And I don’t like thinking about that happening when I’m like – playing video games or something.”

You should ask about video games. Since the video game segment of Spinner’s interview went so viral, you can probably net Tenko a gamer girlfriend. Instead: “What happens when heroes aren’t looking?”

“Nope. It’s my turn,” Tenko says. You guess it probably is. You brace yourself. “What’s your favorite part about being a villain?”

“That’s a new one,” you say, for lack of anything better. “Huh.”

“Like I said, a setup like this is a lot of work,” Tenko says. “And capturing a pro isn’t easy. There must be something you like about it, or you wouldn’t do it. So what is it?”

Tenko gave you a good answer. You feel like you owe him a decent one, and you have to think about it for a second. “I like being free. Not just to do what I want, but to say what I want. And as a – villain, I guess – I can make sure people listen to me. I make sure they listen to my interviewees too.”

You and Spinner didn’t just talk about video games. He talked a lot about being a heteromorph, and you left it all in the video you eventually posted. “My turn now,” you say. “What happens when heroes aren’t looking?”

Tenko’s eyes shift away from yours. “Ask something else.”

“I’ll give you an extra question if you answer this one,” you bargain. “What happens when heroes aren’t looking?”

“Why did you pick me?”

You blink. “Was there a real reason?” Tenko continues. “Or was I just next on your hit list?”

“No,” you say. “I’ve been looking for a chance.”

You have. You had to. Tenko’s anything but an easy target, and if you wanted to capture him, you had to plan ahead. Tenko looks surprised by your answer, but you don’t think he’s unhappy. It’s quiet for a few moments. You’re expecting him to ask his next question. Instead, he answers yours. “What happens when heroes aren’t watching,” he says. “Look closer.”

Look closer? You sit forward, leaning in to study Tenko Shimura’s face. Leaning in maybe a little closer than you should. A lot closer than you’d need to be to see what he’s talking about. “Your scars.”

“People think I got them from a villain,” Tenko says. “I got one of them from my dad.”

Your stomach drops, and you find yourself leaning in closer, one hand already rising before you can think to ask. “Can I –”

“Uh – yeah.” Tenko glances away from you, then looks back. “If you want.”

There are two scars on Tenko Shimura’s face, one over his right eye, the other over the left side of his mouth. They’re both old and smooth, but still obvious. Scars on a person’s face rarely fade. You run your index finger lightly along the scar, and Tenko’s eyes flutter shut. “This one was me,” he says. “When my quirk awakened. I was scratching my face.”

“You must have scratched really hard,” you say. “How old were you?”

“Five.” Tenko’s eyes stay closed. “The one on my mouth was him. He hit me with – something. I don’t remember what.”

You touch that scar, too. Run your index finger over it, like you did with the other one, only this time you can’t make yourself stop. “I’m sorry.”

Tenko’s lips move beneath your finger. “Why? You weren’t there.”

“What you said, about heroes not watching –” This is why you always do interviews. You’re not good at answering questions. “I think that’s when the rest of us are supposed to be doing it. I mean, not us, because we were kids, but – you know what I mean, right?”

“I don’t know. Kind of hard to focus right now.” Tenko’s eyes seem perfectly focused on you. You’re used to your interviewees glaring at you, but nobody’s been as intense about it as Tenko Shimura has. “I don’t remember this from your other interviews.”

“I’m just going with it,” you say. You’ve gone with it far enough that your hand is shifting to cradle his jaw, even as you lean in closer. “What do you think?”

Tenko Shimura’s scarred lips part ever so slightly. “Keep going.”

[duskmachine]

I can't take it anymore. The new Chainsaw Man chapters are so good I have to talk about them. Spoilers for chapters 176-178 below.

Love Yoru here. She undermines the sacrifices Asa has made and describes them as "trifling things" because in Yoru's eyes she has a much bigger goal. She constantly makes fun of Asa because Asa is a child and therefore values things much lesser than the dreams of the War Devil. It's so insane because right in the next panel,

Asa acts like an adult! Would you sacrifice the things you have fought for the sake of your own gain? You say one thing but mean another. Asa is much like Yoru in this regard, she wishes to fulfill Denji's dreams (whatever they may be) and protect him. But in reality, she wants to do these things for the sake of proving she is a "good" person.

This connects back to the church briefly touched on in the previous chapters! What makes a good person? Action or intent? Many people go to church to follow tradition, and follow the values of this religious system because it will secure them in, what they believe to be, heaven. If one does good for the sake of personal gain, can we say that person is "good"?

Yoru and Asa both are willing to destroy what they had wanted to protect in order to gain this "goodness". Asa, without really understanding, is harming Denji while trying to do right by him. And Yoru, who is willing to kill her comrades for...

This! She is willing to give up everything for the sake of proving she is a "more fearsome devil"! She ridicules Asa for the "trifling things" she values, and yet she is sacrificing her own kin for the sake of the most petty bullshit dick measuring contest EVER. One that Chainsaw Man does not even care about. It's not a contest between two of the most "fearsome devils" it's a desperate devil attempting to find any means to remain relevant.

This is some teenager angst coming from a centuries old horseman of the apocalypse.

Armless, mouthless, and with zero agency she comes to realize her pettiness and chooses to steal the freedom of choice from her children. They must serve her as her mouth and her arms. Children then are:

Asa was saved by her mother from the Typhoon Devil. In reality, despite Asa's flaws she is a teenager. She wants go to college, have a home, have friends. Her story reflects Denji's. She wanted a normal life where she was loved and yet, her agency was taken by a devil much more powerful than her and now she must find meaning and power in a position stripped of those things.

In a way she is attempting to find a silver lining, "If I can protect Denji, that means I'm still a good person despite everything". Which is so tragic, because in more ways than one, she was never truly able to make a sound decision due to the lies she was told and the possession of her body.

And come this horrifying sequence of events. Where Asa finds herself as the War Devil, hollowed out of her original heart. Her dream desecrated by war waged for the most petty bullshit dick measuring contest EVER. And isn't that all war? As the Statue of Liberty reveals itself to be a cocooning child of war. True freedom, in the hands of law makers and of devils, is defined by one's ability to wage war and decide who, in the end of mindless violence, is the true victor.

Individuals willing to kill children understood to be a parents' property, or a state's property, are devils through and through.

This is the fundamental horror of being a child, of being poor, of being irrelevant. This is the fate devils and humans similar to Yoru avoid by constantly participating in petty bullshit dick measuring contests.

Denji and Yoru are children who have been hollowed out so devils and humans can wage violent wars that destroy colleges, homes, and families with these children's bodies and hearts.

[skrrts]

Home Is ✧ hongjoong version (oneshot)

✧ gn!reader x kim hongjoong ✧ genre: non-idol, slice of life, fluff, romance ✧ word count: 1,1k

You have found the love of your life, and now the two of you are ready for the next step in your relationship: moving together. Neither of you can wait to finally be able to spend every day together but it's out of the question ... the whole progress looks a lot more casual and aesthetical on social media than it actually is. Chaos. In the middle of the chaos that is moving in, Hongjoong wants you to enjoy this. Moving shouldn't only be an exhausting memory but something you enjoy. He makes you take a break & you make something for your new home together.

a/n: this wraps up my friday mini series for September. thanks a lot to everyone who has been reading along. i figured concluding it with hongjoong is a fun idea, he's definitely enjoying the progress and it takes all longer but is more fun.

The entire apartment was a mess. Unopened and half-emptied boxes were everywhere, items scattered over the floor, or just placed on top of stored furniture in between made-up couches and a mattress that served as a bed. When Hongjoong and you decided to move together, everything seemed perfect until it wasn't. The promised renovation took longer than scheduled and instead of having time to paint walls and slowly set up furniture, two apartments needed to be emptied for the new tenants within just a few days. Now bedroom and living room were shoved into the atelier so that you could slowly work on painting the walls.

Your mood had taken a toll and you admired your boyfriend, who still looked prettily cute and content while you had no idea where to start or finish for the day. You were thankful for his encouragement for you to go and pick up your dinner for the night, walks always calmed your mind. By the time you came back, you were already feeling better.

You were met by the familiar smell of fresh paintings. Honestly, back in high school you never expected to fall in love with a painter but here you were, in your first shared apartment that also included an atelier.

Hongjoong had moved a few of the boxes together, a plastic tablecloth on top with a large variety of colors prepared from bright to neon and pastels. There were cups of water, pencils and a small pile of canvases.

"This doesn't look like dinner," you teased, his smile growing instantly as he got up to kiss you. "I thought, since we ordered salad anyway, it could wait.- It was a stressful weekend and you deserve some relaxation and fun." Says the one having the time of his life painting the walls in the most stunning gradients by hand.

"Is that so?" you smiled, placing the food aside so he could tug you into a hug, foreheads resting together: "I also really wanted to do something special so we always would remember this first time together."

Hongjoong always was like this, excited and optimistic, trying to make the most out of anything and always looking out to cheer you up. One of the many qualities why you fell for him.

"That sounds perfect," you whispered, a final kiss was placed before he led you over and you sat down on one side of the table. "Now then, what should we paint?"

He was smiling his cute smile, the one that showed he was really excited about doing this with you, making a special memory together. "Anything! Well, I want to put it in the small spot in the living room. You know, the one where you noted we still haven't picked anything. And no, you aren't allowed to worry, just have fun. Pick any color you want! Those are my leftovers and I really need to finish them so we also do something good."

Hongjoong was very dedicated to his art, the joy of painting but also not to waste anything. He was very content to use every last drop of paint before buying a new one.

"Alright, let's do this," you chuckled. It felt a little surreal how you were sitting in such a mess but you tried to focus. The image that came to mind first was how your living room would look like when all was set up. There was a tiny balcony and you got a new couch, some messy curtains with a pattern Hongjoong chose, and bold pillows.

It was nice to imagine what the result would be, like recharging the stress of the past few days. Once you decided what to go for, the rest was easy. You were the type to get lost in whatever you were doing. Making a few rough sketches then trying colors on spare paper.

For a while, it seemed Hongjoong was doing the same but by the time you were half way done, the soft click of his camera made you look up, blushing.

"Hey!"

he chuckled sweetly, looking innocent as he rushed to place the phone back down on the table. "Couldn't resist, you are just so cute when you are all lost in progressing."

He was right but you were still pouting: "Sush! You should rather finish your painting." Hongjoong smirked, showing you his already completed free-style art, it was beautiful but you got shy because it was a version of you, here and now.

"Cheating," you mumbled, your cheeks just more red as you cleared your throat. "How about you help me then?" Hongjoong smiled brightly, it was one of the happiest looks you had seen him with and he stood up, sitting behind you, partly pulling you onto his lap.

"I can't wait, our home. Our own little happy place," he whispered, pressing a kiss on your cheek before taking a spare pencil and helping you finish your painting. By the time you finished, you couldn't deny how relaxed you felt.

Hongjoong's arms curled around your waist as you relaxed back against him, your eyes closed when he just held you like that. "This is nice," you admitted. I feel, living with you really won't ever be boring."

Your boyfriend chuckled: "Well, it surely will be a little chaotic but I am your favorite chaos after all."

So silly!

Hongjoong bit his lip, he looked at you and when your gazes met, there was no denying there were many more thoughts but those were kept for another day.

"Dating, moving together... don't care where exactly the journey will take us but meeting you, it has been my best adventure... And always will be my favorite."

You poked his cheek but smiled: "And now you are all sappy. Feel my heartbeat? Always all wild for you."

The man grinned as he finally slowly stood up, your eyes wandered over the mess that was just in every part of your new home. "Quite a bit of work to do," he sighed, pushing brown hair back: "But for today, I think we did enough. Let me put our artwork aside and clean up, then we can eat."

You gave him a quick nod, wiggling your hands covered in dried paint. "I will clean those."

Hongjoong nodded and started to carefully put the painting tool in a bowl to clean it, as you stopped in the door, you looked at him, adoring, loving.

You really were lucky, chaos or not. This home was your dream come true, always wishing to move together with whoever the love of your life would be and you did quite a good pull with this one, right?

"Joong, you know... after we ate, maybe we should properly test out our big new bathtub," you grinned. His cheeks flushed when he looked up, mumbling something.

This time you laughed: "Leave it to me, I will prepare it."

Hongjoong rolled his eyes as the two of you smiled at one another. Now, you were both home.

[beecauseevan]

omg established buddie yes

movie nights!! with chris preferably

Silence permeates the living room, expectant and uncomfortably tense. Eddie shifts in his spot on the couch, cringing when his jeans rasp against the cushions. He steals a glance at Chris, who is transfixed by the images flashing across the TV screen. Next to Chris, just visible over his brown curls, Buck is chewing on his bottom lip. Despite that obvious struggle to keep his big mouth shut, he's not the one who breaks the tense silence.

"Oh man," Chris says. His fingers twitch, like he's fighting the urge to cover his eyes with his hands. "I knew you were old, dad. I didn't know you were ancient."

Buck's laugh is choked and startled and only grows louder when Eddie glares at him over Chris' head.

"That's not—" Eddie starts. "This was already old when I watched it."

Chris tears his eyes away from the TV just long enough to shoot him an incredulous look. "Are you sure?"

"I didn't know you were a nerd," says Buck, who watches documentaries for fun and really doesn't get to talk. "This is all new information."

"I'm not a nerd."

"This is pretty nerdy," Chris argues.

Eddie shakes his head and eats an indignant fistful of popcorn. This is what he gets for trying to educate the youth. 

It's Christopher's fault, really. 

"I want to watch something," he said earlier, at dinner, chewing on Buck's newly perfected version of Bobby's veggie lasagna. "Something with space."

"Star Wars?" Buck suggested, twirling his fork between his fingers. "We haven't watched Episode V in a while."

Disapproval scrunching up his face, Chris shook his head. "We've watched it like a thousand times, though."

"It's a masterpiece," Buck replied, making Eddie—who had introduced him to Star Wars—very proud. "Can't see it too many times."

Eddie didn't add anything to their back and forth, a quietly content observer, warmed from the inside by Buck's lasagna and from the outside by the presence of the two people he cared most about. 

"Or," Buck added, "we can watch Revenge of the Sith, if you want."

"You hate that one," Chris said.

"I don't hate it. I just think the original trilogy is better."

"You're wrong." 

"The original trilogy has Han Solo," Buck said. "And Yoda. And Luke."

"Yoda is in the prequels too," Chris argued. "And the prequels have Jar Jar Binks."

"That's—a good thing?"

Chris shrugged. "He's funny."

Buck glanced at Eddie, who hid his smile in his palm. "He has a point."

Buck's eyes said does he, but of course that's not what came out of his mouth. Buck might be a worse pushover than Eddie, if that is even physically possible.

"Fine," he said, "Revenge of the Sith it is."

"No," Chris sighed, stabbing his fork into the leftovers on his plate. "I want to watch something new."

And Eddie, naive and optimistic wounded heart that he is, suggested something he would soon regret: "I really liked Star Trek when I was a kid. We could check that out."

"The movies?" Chris asked. "We've seen the movies, dad."

Chris meant the new ones, and Eddie didn't have the strength to tell him that he was a little too old to have watched those movies as a kid. He let that comment slide and shook his head. 

"No, the show. The original one. With William Shatner?"

Chris shook his head, and a moment later, so did Buck. Eddie took a moment to picture the horrifiedly disappointed face Chim would make in response to that statement, then moved on. 

"You guys are in for a treat."

He meant it then, too. He really thought they would love it. 

Turns out childhood memories don't always depict reality in all of its grainy, puke-yellow flannelled glory. The show is a lot more rough than he remembers and it doesn't help that he started them off with the first episode of the first season, instead of one of the good ones. He thought this would be a hit and they'd end up watching it regularly, but—well. 

"Why do his eyes look like that?" Chris asks, frowning at the screen. 

Eddie just shrugs—Buck, who has never been able to leave a question unanswered, is already digging out his phone. 

"No googling," Eddie scolds him. "You're gonna ruin the immersion."

Buck waves him off, phone screen lighting up the smirk on his face. 

"I just wanna know why they're wearing pajamas," Chris adds.  

"Wish our uniforms looked like that," Buck says, glancing up from his phone just long enough to smirk at Eddie. "They're probably really cozy."

"Not very cool, though," Chris points out. 

"It's tinfoil," Buck cuts in. "Tinfoil contacts. That's how they got his eyes to look like that."

Chris frowns. "Ew."

"Guys," Eddie complains weakly. "This is a classic."

Buck has the decency to say, "I'm sorry," but the way he mumbles it against his palm, barely concealed laughter coloring his voice, tells Eddie that he's not that sorry at all. 

"You said the same thing about Die Hard," Chris points out. "That was bad too."

Eddie shakes his head, stunned, and looks at Buck, who shrugs. 

"He's not wrong."

"That's it," Eddie decides, while the tinfoil-eyed monsters continue to poach the crew of the Enterprise, "I'm moving out. I bet Chim will take me in."

"More lasagna for me," Chris says, entirely unbothered. 

Buck laughs, loud and clear, and Eddie puts his hands in front of his eyes and pretends, badly and unconvincingly, to be upset. He isn't, he couldn't be, even if this were his favorite piece of media in the whole entire universe as opposed to just a show he used to enjoy as a kid—he couldn't be mad, because it's hard to be upset when you're faced with such stark reminders of why your life is as close to perfect as it could possibly be. Eddie loves that Chris and Buck hate the show, because they hate it together. He loves being the center of their good-natured mockery, because it means they're teaming up on him. They're a family. Eddie's family. And he loves them more than life.

As the episode goes on—and it goes on for ages—Chris grows more and more quiet. When the credits start rolling, he's dozed off. His head is pillowed on Buck's arm and Buck sits perfectly still, which in itself is a little bit of a miracle.

"Think he'll wake up if I carry him to bed?" Buck asks quietly, carefully, like he'd rather stop breathing than disturb Chris, which, knowing Buck, might not be too far from the truth.

"Probably," Eddie says, "I think you're gonna have to move."

"I really don't want to."

"Guess you're sleeping on the couch," Eddie shrugs.

Buck sighs. Then he moves, and Chris blinks awake, yawns, and for a moment he's six again, so small Eddie could delude himself into thinking that all he needed to do was fold him into his arms and the world would never be able to touch him.

Then Chris groans and rubs his eyes and looks around, instantly annoyed in that way only a tired teenager can be, and Eddie is back in the here and now, and he finds he likes it just the same.

"Hey, sleepyhead." Buck pokes Chris' shoulder and Eddie watches, with a smile that almost hurts his cheeks, as Chris rolls his eyes, teenage stubbornness without any sort of sting, because even though he's biologically and socially obligated to find adults annoying and embarrassing, Buck is still his person. "You ready for bed?"

"Yeah, yeah," Chris grumbles.

"I can come with," Eddie offers, and gets the same kind of eyeroll in return, and feels a rush of warmth when he realizes that maybe—maybe he's still Chris' person too. It's been a long road since Kim, but maybe they're getting there.

"I'm not a baby, dad," Chris tells him, straightening up on his crutches. "I can brush my teeth on my own."

"Alright, alright," Eddie relents.

Chris goes off on his own and by the time Buck and Eddie are done with the dishes, the rest of the house is quiet, including Christopher's room. Eddie glances at Buck, standing by the sink, and finds Buck looking back at him. He's wearing yellow rubber gloves and an apron and the smirk on his lips is not entirely innocent. 

"Hey."

"Hey yourself," Buck says, stripping off the gloves in one smooth motion. Eddie wonders what it says about him that that kind of turns him on. "You know, I thought Star Trek was all about homoerotic sexual tension. Didn't feel much of that."

Eddie blinks. "What?"

"Captain Kirk and the guy with the," Buck points at the side of his head, "ears."

Eddie feels a smile coming on and bites down on his bottom lip. He can't be that easy. "You know about that but you don't know who William Shatner is?"

"I have niche interests," Buck tells him, hands finding Eddie's hips. His smile is brilliant. His hands are cold. The sleeves of his hoodie are still rolled up. Eddie loves this man to the core. 

"Hm." Eddie sways closer, wraps his arms around Buck's shoulders, brings their lips together in a lingering kiss. "Boy, do I have the episode for you."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Eddie hums. Another warm kiss later, he laces their fingers together and leads Buck back into their living room, turns the TV back on. "This one is called Amok Time."

[katyspersonal]

Okay Lore Queen

What are your thoughts on Melina being the GEQ? Is there real evidence for it or was this another overblown “Miquella is Griffith” theory trend?

Awww, am I Lore Queen? 🥺

Okay, to be honest.. not only I am sure there is no solid evidence in the game itself for this, but also I completely missed the spreading of this theory, apparently fdhhfdfds The first time I ever heard that it exists and is popular was a video from Zullie! I don't remember which, but the line that 'many people suggested she might be Gloam-Eyed Queen herself' surprised me! Until that point I did not even consider the connection, I just thought that she was given Destined Death long ago just in case if things go BAD, or something along those lines?

As for the reasoning, there are a few things:

Maliketh is said to have sealed Destined Death, Gloam-Eyed Queen's power, and the seal on her eye DOES look like a clawmark! Melina only mentions that she will "give Destined Death" in Frenzied Flame ending, when this eye is unsealed, helping the assumption that the power of Destined Death was what got sealed in her until this point!

Her sealed eye is also pretty 'gloam'! More than that: her Japanese name is 宵眼の女王, and 宵 more specifically means nightfall, early night, late evening, twilight or dusk. Fun fact: her eye is similar to literal color 'Dusk'!

( x ) Not only pre-patched version mentioned her as Dusk-Eyed Queen first, but it also makes sense to name Fia's ending as 'Age of Duskborn'! Granted, I am not sure people thought under this angle, but even then, gloam means dark and Melina's eye still qualified :p

There is also that besides Marika, only her children got to be chosen as Empyreans: Ranni, Malenia and Miquella! So whereas some people believed GEQ was chosen by the Two Fingers as Greater Will grew dissatisfied with Marika (oh those pre-SOTE times...), others believed GEQ was a daughter of Marika who rebelled! Melina being daughter of Marika but strikingly "underwhelming" for a Demigod for the lack of better term could also mean that she had her true power taken! The Godskin prayerbook is also oddly found in Stormveil, so if we assume it was one of the treasures Godrick stole from Leyendell, what exactly was it doing in Leyendell to begin with? :p

Finally, the DLC added this bit:

So now we know Melina, rather than being given some sort of fire powers by Marika, was more likely naturally possessing "vision of fire"! Maybe cursed, or maybe it was just her nature connecting with the burning of the Erdtree!

So... yeah, these clues feel more like 'material for interpretation and speculation' than as a solid evidence that there IS something here, right? I think GEQ also feeling "too important" played its role! Fromsoft does have a strange brand of mentioned characters, so for me it was simpler to skip this theory as Elden Ring was not my first game from them! But they like to drop that mentioned character who feels so significant that the audience just CAN'T believe they only exist in memories and description but never were encountered in the game! Off the top of my head, Bloodborne for example has 'Suspicious Beggar is Izzy', and sometimes EVEN 'Rom is Caryll'! Again, as someone used to them doing the thing, I'd not be surprised that we never would meet GEQ!

OKAY you wanted my THOUGHTS, not just analysis, right? I think this idea is cool! It has to deal with several assumptions, but... most Elden Ring theories do anyway... 🙄 It would also make Marika giving Melina her purpose so funny fdfdsdh Just going "Hey, you wanted to slay gods once? Well I have good news-" before the Shattering fdshfhfds Personally, I go back and forth about it, and recently I am stronger on the side of not believing that Melina is GEQ!

My impression from GEQ is that she was an equal of Marika, chosen at the same time as her and on the same terms as her! Ancient Elden Ring not only featured Crucible and Divine Spiral, but also Destined Death Rune! Needless to mention that Destined Death Rune is opposite of Marika's Rune by concept, color and design!

This makes me feel as though GEQ and Marika were some sort of balance for one another: Marika was day, light and life and GEQ was night, darkness and death! GEQ's fire is God-Slaying Flame, something to ensure that nothing and no one can live forever. GEQ being a daughter of Marika does not have a very "equal" vibe to it. However, Marika wanted to be 'eternal' and believed herself to be worthy of seizing that power! She would decide who dies 'a true death' and how, and it sure would NOT be her or her children!

So, Melina was born with a curse for the same reason why Messmer was born with a curse. Karmic retributions for destroying GEQ, Fell God and what happened to Belurat where Romina is from respectively! Marika tried to deceive the fate and make a better world, but unfortunately as far as Greater Will was concerned back then, it made the world capable of "self-correcting". On the other hand, Romina is survivor of Belurat and it backfired on Malenia, whereas wraiths that haunt Omens are horned spirits so maybe Mohg and Morgott were result of victims of the Crusade cursing everyone living under Marika's light. No matter how much she tries, she can't remove 'dangerous', 'destructive', 'evil' things from nature.

Melina's eye also could imply something else!

(Images by Zlofsky) Shadowbeasts (Maliketh and Blaidd) do have this eye color as well! Maliketh doesn't have eyes, however Beast Eye he gives us as Gurranq is most likely his own! So, ignoring 'dusk-eyed' thing, what if his second eye was used to replace Melina's real one, similarly to how Marika used her seal to replace Messmer's real eye?

Alternatively, since Shadowbeasts are not just vassals of Empyreans, but also assassins in the situation if Empyrean resists the will of the Two Fingers, the similar coloration might be because conceptually Melina and Shadowbeasts are similar! Melina is our friend, helping us to grow stronger, but at the same time she is the one to come assassinate us if we fuck up big time, right?

I also agree with the idea that this statue likely depicts GEQ herself! Not just because non-optional Godskin Apostles, Wormfaces and actually guarded Destined Death itself are in Farum Azula! But also because these three wolves appear to be conjoined, which makes me think of a youkai Kamaitachi!

There is a youkai, Kamaitachi - a flying weasel spinning in whirlwhind and associated with strong winds in general that delivers sharp cut wounds but there is no bleeding or pain! Already sounds a bit like how Destined Death hurts in my opinion, especially seeing how some attacks of Godskins are also whirlwind-like! Kamaitachi's claws are also sickle-like! This is literally a name: kama is sickle and itachi is weasel.

So, unusual Shadowbeast for her! I also like to think that she had Scadutree like Marika had Erdtree. Removing Destined Death from the Elden Ring, and removing Shadow Realm, that IS the death realm, from the world's map..

I also question whether this statue's aesthetic is more akin to Rauh than it is to.. well, anything else:

There is an option Divine Beast boss fight in Rauh who, inexplicably, uses Deathblight in Phase 2 instead of storm-blizzard-lightning but there is NO Deathroot or Godwyn eyes in sight, so who knows?

______________________

So yeah, the theory does hold some weight and I can see that it is something fans could eventually come to even without communication with each other! It is not really just a fandom invention that became too popular! I just skipped through it because of how I read Fromsoft's lore personally, and now I bounce back and forth! I had a middle ground idea sort of, that it was not possible to kill GEQ but she became a baby and Marika raised her in order to control! (feel weaker on this one after Melina was called Messmer's just sister, not adopted or anything like that)

[iraprince]

Hiii, i love your stuff and kinda from a distance really look up at you for, in my perception, being able to express yourself without giving a fuck. Thats sick dude, Im so so afraid, of absolutely everything, its nice to think like i might grow into someone less apologetic of my existence. Nice to see people just being yknow

hey, thank you, this is really really nice. the secret that is probably not a secret is that i am also deeply afraid a lot of the time lmao -- but less than i used to be, and in ways that feel less stifling and self-suffocating, if that makes sense.

like, it used to be "i'm scared that if i express myself the way i want to, everyone will find me obnoxious, so let's just sand those edges down to be safe" -- now my fears are more like "now that i'm expressing myself in a way that feels natural and real, i'm afraid that it's all stupid/vapid/not worthwhile or meaningful" (<- specifically abt my art) or "i'm happy that i talk and act the way i want to now, but what if it makes me impossible to befriend," etc etc etc. which still feels bad and puts me in a funk a lot of the time but at least it's a fear that comes After/in reaction to doing stuff, rather than a fear that STOPS me from doing stuff, you know? like, it's evolved into a kind of fear that's less in my way.

anyway. i believe you'll experience something like this, because wanting to grow is the first step of growing. the fact that u hope or wish for something different means you're already on your way. to fewer fucks!! or at least distributing the fucks u give in a way that serves u better

[prismatoxic]

congrats on writing the fic that made a man text his (sort of estranged) dad. fr your portrayal of every single dynamic is so flawless and considerate. nobel prize.

THAT ACTUALLY DOES FEEL LIKE AN ACCOMPLISHMENT... i hope it goes well anon!!!

there's a lot to be said about people who did the wrong things but feel genuine remorse and want to get better, i think. i've been there (though not in a parent sense), and it's also what happened with my mom after i moved out, so i guess i kind of know how it is from both angles. on top of, you know, just writing what i know of who chilchuck is as a person (and assuming a lot of things about meijack and the others, lmao...)

[whimsyprinx]

a new attempt at me trying to sketch out ideas for my porcelain (faerie) royalty outfit that I’m putting together, all I have so far is the shirt, earring (it’s not even finished) and bracelet

[endbeginning]

and if i said.... pet.er peve.nsie.....

[solipseismic]

this is so stupid but i deespise it when unskilled players drop an ez in the game chat. shut your junkrat 1k bronze ass had less damage than the enemy zenyatta (me) ass "ive just been shooting random shots into the sky the entire game and hoping they'd hit the other team" "ggez" "dps diff" headass UP. i'm SICK and TIRED and our tank picked DOOMFIST. and we held on the POINT. i don't want to HEAR IT.

[spectrearia]

hhh found some photos of old disney trips from several years back and it just made me really sad that the parks are nothing like what they were back then anymore. i still feel like it was probably best in the 90s and early 2000s (from what i've seen in videos documenting that time frame, and from the few trips my fam went on as well), but i ended up visiting more often in the 2010s and i still really enjoyed it;;

i miss walking around and just drinking in the atmosphere and theming honestly. sucks that its a mess now and you're paying so dang much for lackluster quality and there's no room for spontaneous flexibility within your visit because of the stupid genie+ app and insane wait times for Everything. the fact that there's no real "off season" anymore because it's Always Busy is a terrible reality as well. *sigh*

[hauntingblue]

Strong world is the nami and luffy twins manifesto written by oda this is my one piece.

You see luffy's finishing attack with his giant hammer being fueled by lightning which is nami's main weapon with her clima tact and she even made the guy steer the islands towards the cyclone so even if the lighting isn't produced by her the lighting is provided by her either way so luffy AND her finished that guy and even luffy attacked after nami announced how he will lose which also means nami knew and trusted luffy to end him after that and of course he did and

Oh my god luffy making nami explain herself about the message he left on the tone dial and being pissed that she didn't trust him to save and protect her but he got so mad and didn't hear the whole message and she asked luffy to save her omg....... she knew after all that they will come and win..... I love this ending I am going to walk into the sea now goodbye.

Why are whitebeard and ace on the ending credits I already cried. Watching aces part again cause he looks so good. Hello alive dead wife

[mel-loly]

-“2022..”

(read the tags)

[yo9urt]

horrible things have happened in ball dur's gait 3

[theamazingannie]

I’m a sucker for musical parallels and referencing an old song in a new song but I feel like this TTPD lead up is not just a “this is how I used to feel and now I’m using those themes to show how I feel now” and more of a “those feelings were never real and actually those love songs that were so beautiful before are actually about a bad relationship and full of red flags” cuz it’s honestly ruining my feelings on those old songs. Like Taylor’s whole thing is letting us interrupt the songs and apply them to our own lives and now it’s like even she is encouraging us to only see them through the lens of her most recent breakup and it really sucks tbh