#but the feeling itself isnt going to be able to explain why you feel that way or what about the art is working or isnt working—

[cconfusedkat]

I can never get enough of using these templates HDEJDHSKD [creds here]

They all have widely different dynamics :>c you can probably tell who im most fond of tbh 😭

Leshylamb are probably the most friendly towards eachother, they're in a qpr fun fact!! They bond the most easily but it's quite rare for them to catch up? Leshy is busy on missionary parties and then catching rest for a day, while Allure has to keep up with cult maintenance and usually their own personal crusades- but that explains these two deciding to go on a personal crusade with eachother. 😭 its really funny cuz leshy could be tossing allure up in the air and hes shouting at them like "SO HOW HAVE YOU BEEN DUDE!!!!!!" And allure casually swings a heretic head off and looks back at leshy like "OH IVE BEEN DOING RATHER DANDY!!!!!!!!!"

Lambket is ,, sorta uncommunicative...? Heket doesn't really have a clue on why Lamb likes her so much 😭🙏 theyre too afraid to tell her anything beyond that but thats just their brain still believing shes gonna get angry at anything they say. As much as she is a hothead (she has the hothead trait anyways), it's not like Allure is th subject of that nearly as much-- she's grown fond of Allure like how fond she is of Shamura, nothing can quite compare to that fondness of hers. They both feel like they need to walk on eggshells around eachother, but it's far from that verbatim, the relationship definitely needs more communication LAMFOSFJSL

Kallalamb... ouh. Oh Boy. Oh Man. The real times they "spend" time together are either,, COUGH, apparent Accidental Intimacy, or actually just bullying eachother 💀🙏 allure almost killed kallamar one time during sparring too and it left the two to not talk for what, like, WEEKS? Allure apologized for giving kallamar The Almost Casual Beheading and shi was like "im not fucking forgiving you" (shi proceeds to giggle and kick hir legs when they leave the tailor parlor because shi finds it funny whenever they apologize for something). Buut yeah,, Definitely Enemies,, with. With No Homosexual Intent (BRO ALLURE CAN READ YOUR THOUGHTS !!!!! THEY KNOW YOU'RE GAY !!!!!!)

Lambmura is domestic and theyre literally just like an old married couple- either getting on eachothers nerves (on purpose usually) or spending too much alone time together. Allure frequently asks to sleepover at Shamuras shelter because they like to sleep next to their spouse ,, shamura doesn't rlly like sleeping over at allures leader tent? So ? Theyre so domesticated and silly but Shamuras memory usually gets in the way and they feel like allure is dead if they dont see them for too long. Thats what usually triggers an episode within Shamura ,, so ,, Allures clinginess is a little Worsened because of that- trying to reassure Shamura theyre alive- shamura is the calm and collected one after all ,, they dont like seeing shamura genuinely upset

Narilamb is complex in itself. Narinder is the more or so clingy one, but its a little toxic...? Because hes a bit *too* codependent on them...? The main reason anyways is because narinder doesnt wanna experience death for a second time, he still recalls his original death already being,,, Brutal. ??? SO . HE KINDA HAS THAT RIGHT TO BE AFRAID . but thats the toxicity, because its not like Allure would want to kill narinder ever again?? He has high expectations for them and hes a mortal now. Allure is aware of these high expectations and just shrugs them off, cuz, well, what else are they meant to do in fixing Narinders issues if he isnt able to better himself? Narinder /eventually/ does get better mentally but even so its tough to describe their relationship without it being pretty toxic in the first place

,,, Annd with that , basically narilamb and leshylamb are in qprs! Kallalamb is more of. Like. A situationship? At that? Kallalamb usually has their private moments and theyre well aware of this, and yet they *still* choose to hate eachother LMAOOAOA theyre clearly able to stop putting up this act but at this point it feels Natural to continue this hate phase

But yeah!! They all have complexities, even if it doesnt seem too like it!! Very fun to build these pairings up :>c

[ssspork]

Some Fanart for https://archiveofourown.org/works/61679998 (which is so awesome sauce go read it) @kenshin1340 (not to sure how to tag people tbh but idk how else u would find this😭)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61679998

There’s some symbolism which I will explain down below, and perchance a rant about how I adore how Lux is written and the idea of freedom that this fic is exploring

Also the speed paint with the song

ANYWAYS, symbolism time!!

this piece was inspired by Eleanor Rigby, so the “church” Lux is buried in is the lecture room, bc this is Luxs place of sanctuary. Her freedom, though “nobody came” bc she feels so isolated from others, following things she doesn’t particularly like bc she knows she’ll never get that in the future. We see this in the party scene where she wins, but her smile doesn’t reach her eyes. She feels alone.

Than herself, she’s yellow, a color of happiness and freedom and light, like her name itself, but ironically, she is trapped, as is why her dress is so tight. She lays under a spotlight, the same way her family always has its eyes in her. And a incomplete halo of sorts of blood, she is so close to being free, but she can’t nor will be. The blood comes from what I had assumed to be a blunt force trauma injury, but I’m starting to believe it was a contraption and not a injury that left the scar.

Silco is the priest, alone as well, like Lux, he appears to be some sort of parallel (he was what she is) he sees her injury, as is shown with the red eye, and (most likely) sees it in himself(This is a prediction). He is difficult to see, blending into the background as unable to help. As for Lux to be free, she must figure out who will be free first, and allow herself TO be free (see rant).

Than Luxs name is wiped away, and Luxanna written in top. This is because “Lux” is the free version of “Luxanna” and Lux will die if she goes back, as with Pascal, who is also being wiped away. (Pascal would have worked better with the metaphor, however, having a variation of her name being wiped away and her full name ontop works better thematically)

And than Jinx’s signature at the bottom left, a reference to when she drew Lux in the first place. She’s drawing this because, like her father, she is observant (the both of them noticed her scar). Also, this was an accident, but to make a metaphor of it, her name is written like Roman numerals, similar to how VI’s name is. Which could be used as a sorta parallel between Garen and Vi (in some way?? I feel like Vi and Garen are going to be foils or parallels in some capacity)

Anyways, rant time:

The way this fic has handled the idea of freedom is AMAZING. Usually in Lux fics, Lux can’t be free due to external forces, which sometimes have become internal, and to fix the internal, she must fix the external. But here, the external forces are gone, she’s the one who controls her freedom. And despite having freedom, she truly, has none. Because freedom with a end is not freedom.

So to make up for the fact she will no longer have freedom, she does stuff to try to make up for it: for example, the tree fairy costume I don’t remember exactly what it was called (also like drinking and smoking weed). Stuff she knows she won’t be able to do later. But the thing is, she doesn’t like this stuff, in trying to be free, she’s trapped herself. And now she’s trapped in 2 ways, of her attempts to be free, and what’s been instilled inside her.

We see she never truly lets her guard drop (other than 1 time, but that was when she was with Jinx), she always has a set smile for everything, everything is planned out. Just as how she sees her life. Because of this, she can’t let herself be free, because she doesn’t even really know who SHE is. There’s Luxanna, her parents child. There’s Pascal, the free, but her name ISNT Pascal, it’s Lux(Luxanna as well). Pascal is free, but she isn’t really Pascal. She’s Lux, and Lux needs to be free. But who IS Lux?

And WOULDNT YOU KNOW IT?? that’s what Silcos speech WAS ABOUT. It was about how his class with allow his students to find themselves. AUGH ITS SO GOOD. And the fact that Luxs guard WENT DOWN when around Jinx, if just for a second, if just for a accident, and Jinx CAN AND DOES SEE IT. Oh my golly gee I love it when you can see the arc, this is so good,

[sasakisyndrome]

theres something so special about charles and edwins Songᵗᵐ being welcome to the black parade because it just feels so distinctly them. like dead boy detectives and the black parade have similar thesis statements so its not super surprising but man do they go together well.

the song starts with a simple, elegant, and recognisable piano melody all on its own with relatively untouched vocals. that piano stays the prominent focus of the first half of the intros instrumental but is soon joined soon with the more parade-like rythyms, almost militant sounding drums and the piano (likely) mimicking a xylophone.

the use of these much more classical feels like it should juxtapose with the gradually crescendoing drums and the focus shifting from the piano melody being the most prominent to the electric guitar, a much modern instrument then the piano during the reprise of the first stanza of the song into the latter half, but the drums (representing the parade of death) keep the melody grounded together.

and the thing is somehow that combination of the piano into the guitar works it sounds awesome. the transition from gerards relatively gentle singing over the piano into the belting over the much more traditionally “rock emo” sound. the album is a rock opera which in itself should be an oxymoron but somehow WORKS.

and isnt that just such a perfect parallel to the prim and proper shy edwardian boy who died in 1916 (and missed 70 years of earth history) and the boy from the 80s who wears punk patches, and jewelery who is self declared “aces with other people.”

and that just the insturmentals, don’t even get me started on the lyrics like holy guacamole !!!!!!!!! there’s just such an inherint teenage angst to it that you can just get why it’s resonated with so many young people.

He said, "Son, when you grow up, would you be, the savior of the broken, the beaten, and the damned?"

though the boys never did get to grow up, they spend their time helping other ghosts with unfinished business be able to move on to their afterlives, helping the broken, the beaten, and ocassionally, the damned. that’s a basic breakdown of the show!!!! and the bridge omg…

Do or die, you'll never make me, Because the world will never take my heart Go and try, you'll never break me We want it all, we wanna play this part I won't explain or say I'm sorry I'm unashamed, I'm gonna show my scar And give a cheer for all the broken Listen here, because it's who we are Just a man, I'm not a hero Just a boy who had to sing this song Just a man, I'm not a hero I don’t care

charles and edwin never wanted to be “the dead boy heros” thats a horrible name. they just wanted to be detectives and to solve mysteries that no one else would. and they do it in exchange for top hats, and taffy, and cursed objects from people who needed help.

two boys who were both hatecrimed, whos deaths got covered up, who saw humanity at its absolute lowest, still choose to believe there is good in the world and want to help others. and they’re gonna be themselves while doing it! they’re gonna be bitchy, and loud, and forget things, and act like teenage boys, and if you don’t like that then go find other detectives.

when talking about the song gerard way spoke about how he liked that “a parade could either be for a funeral or for a celebration.” and for the album, and for the show, it’s both. and i’m very glad he and the rest of the band let them use the song in the trailer. because though the boys are dead and gone, but that doesn’t change the fact that they will carry on.

[sparklymilks]

ben wants me to have a tina sesh before we go to berlin bc i dont think he thinks im coping or w/e you want to call it... i think i am JUST coping but this in itself is probably not a great argument of like, "Im fine actually bc im not actively sobbing 24/7"

i think im just finding everything a big bag of dicks atm

i offered ben two meals out in berlin but he is hoping for more. i felt like a bit frustrated and demoralised by this bc to me im like - are you fucking with me? im GOING TO BERLIN WITH YOU like why the fuck does everything have to be about food????? our first trip EVER in 12y out of the UK - why is the food aspect so important like i want to go to the fucking zoo. why is that not enough why do i also have to do like meals out for no fucking reason!!!! ALSO ITS PRIMARILY A WORK TRIP

not to mention the fact that ive literally been at home with him the entire time he's been ill this week like ive been trying really hard on so many different fronts and at some point im gonna need to be like - actually no i cant do any more sorry this is what you are getting!!!! ive been spending so much of the last year trying to be a good partner to him bc of him suddenly developing social anxiety too and i think i have neglected my own self growth a lot(he is very keen on teh idea i spend more time on myself ftr, he wants me to do more stuff for me and worry about him less - it's me that finds that very difficult to do)

literally like a few years ago like chat could we even fucking conceive of the idea that i would be able to go to berlin on a work trip? obviously no. im still a bit frustrated about the fact that im not being showered with praise everywhere i go by everyone for making such a huge effort in my life to see and do new things and i feel like the focus is always on what i still cant (or wont, ig) do. Fuuuucks sake. i will accept either anon or named asks telling me how impressed they are with everything im doing bc honestly fucking hell i am trying so hard and i FEEL that it isnt appreciated much right now!!!!

im also feeling a bit cross generally bc ben gave me his cold which is just another added irritation

he was trying to soothe me and explaining it's not that he's not proud of me he would just like to do stuff with his wife. which i get but it's hard not to feel personally like a failure for not being able to give him what he wants all the time. and no he has never said anything close to this and i would hope that's obvious. i just feel really frustrated and on edge about this upcoming trip. i guess that was always going to happen tbh

[empress-6-3]

Hazbin Hotel Theory's

I am pretty sure some people had the same thoughts before me but i still want to write about it.

1.

The Angel was probably killed by the power of love / divine power

I think if you fight for someone else and not for your own gain, you unleash good power which is the only thing able to hurt an Angel.

Season 1 will propably end with the Main cast all protecting each other from the angel attack ( they start the extermination at the hotel ) and figuring this out mid fight. Scaring the angels into quitting the attack and Proving all sinners that the hotel works.

Season 2 could than start with everyone wanting to stay at the hotel and some angels hating the idea of sinners going into heaven, planning one big attack. Giving more Focus to an all out battle than we have left. Season one is only 8 episodes so i think this war will only be a set up for next season. With the first beeing more about the forming bonds and proving the dream.

2.

Alastor made a deal with lilith

They were both gone for 7 years.

Also Alastor doesnt seem interested in the cause itself, nor does he Sabotage it. He doesnt try to make a deal with Charlie and is a good supporting guy to the group ( does what he is been told ).

But he isnt a good guy and he hints that he gets something out of this.

Since he holds his end of the deal, it could be that he is currently fullfilling a deal, which includes protecting charlie and supporting her.

Lucifer doesnt know him, so it could only be lilith who made the deal with him.

The 7 years was alastor helping lilith with things so he could gain her trust ( showing that he does keep his end of the deal and is responsible with the task given - no creep towards charlie, etc ) and that the souls under his care are not completly abused like angel = lilith does care about her people. And that he is a charming, calm fellow who can be trusted not to abuse his power. ( the overlord takeout an exclusion, maybe we get more Infos later / there are still old overlords around who like him and he didnt Kill husk to take his Position )

The deal would not be her soul but the souls she has under her. Or otherwise gaining more power through her.

This makes him not a nice guy but not bad either since his goal would only be power for power sake ( he realised he cant keep climbing the letter so the royals where the best think to fix the Problem).

He just seems like a guy who is civil and respectful towards Others but needs confidents in his own powers and feels he needs to improve more. ( those guys who always desire more power for impruvement sake only ). Not to defeat Others but for his own well beeing / calm of mind. To get attention.

So this can be an ending where the power increase would not change his character Behavior. Only explain why he did what he did. Him getting stronger by helping charlie is not really a bad ending, it keeps him selfish enough to never be redeemed but nice enough to still be a Main character.

After all i dont want him to backstab the others or turn into the villain. But i also cant see him not beeing up to anything, for that there are to many hints.

Doing something good for his own sake only but having fun while doing it is a nice compromise between good and evil.

Also lilith would prove that she cares about charlie.

[whiteoutzz]

Hi! Is it ok if you elaborate and/or explain how disabled characters within Wings of Fire aren’t treated well and/or written well within the series (and/or that Wings of Fire is very weird about disabled characters) please?

sorry it took me a bit anon, but i needed to gather my thoughts.

But basically; while there is alot i could focus on, that even with disabled characters that are good, their disabilty isn't really all that researched (both starflight and tamarin for example, but i don't know enough to make a whole post about them), or how narrative often treats them as disposable or not as important as rest of the characters (ospery literally exist just to be killed. and yes alot of characters die in wof, but he is one book and then is killed off for other characters progression) (also whiteout. but i will make analysis of her another time). or whatever stonemover had going on.

and even with jerboa iii / boa, she hides her missing talons out of shame in her story, but it almost seems like its so the auhtor is more comofrtable with her, and idunno maybe she stops doing that later but it does feel gross to me. < and yes i am aware that loss of her talons was in a traumatic way but it doesn't really justify it, especially with how other disabled characters are written.

and even fucking Scarlet, who is disabled as a punishment (in the narrative, not the story itself. also she hides her scar in some instances with animus magic, and yes im especially including her).

clay's disability is mostly forgotten both by books and fandom, and much more.

but i do think one of the things that angers me the most is chameleon, and how you can't really fix that without literally not making him a villain. HIS WHOLE MOTIVATION is that is he is disabled, angry at the ableism, and changing himself due to that. and greed too i guess, but you can't really ingore the disability part, and i just look at how he is written. HE IS LITERALLY EVIL BECAUSE HE IS DISABLED... in text he has a facial difference (even if he is rarley drawn with it), a sleeping disorder, and of course, not being able to change his scales. its the most visible one in fact. he is kicked out from his kingdom literally because he is disabled, and he is angry, and finds the scroll, and does evil things or whatever. (and also has peril and is a questionable father).

I can't really describe how angry i am at his character existing. And you can't fix him! At best you could have rainwings with his disability who aren't evil, but even then, his motivation is that he is disabled, and its his primary motivation. It fuels his anger, its why he takes on multiple forms, its why he attacks Kinkajou, its probably why he tries to change Peril. < also greed, but im ignoring this on purpouse because it isnt relevant to the discussion and it doesn't erase the fact that his main motivation is that he is angry because he is disabled and how he changes himself into different dragons, and how he has distain for other rainwings, all that.

Why is it a problem? Well because it implies disability can make you evil and also even if we are symphatetic to Chameleon, there is no solution for his anger. The problems aren't fixed. And we never get another Rainwing character who can't change their scales. His evilness is tied to his disability, both of them connected. If one was to fix that, you would need to redeem him or not make him a villain in the first place, but then what is the point of his character. Its not just lack of reaserch or few things in poor taste, ITS HIS WHOLE CHARACTER!

And for the record, im not calling tui an evil horrible bigot, but she is not immune to bias. Its not just ableism of course, series has other issues, but its really really glaring.

Coming back to some characters; how Boa hides her disabilty, its of course of internalized ableism, but characters do not exist in a vaccum. Blind characters are commonly potrayed with cataracts (clody, foggy eyes), regardless of their actual type of blindess, or with something covering their eyes (like a blindfold). disabled characters are often killed off or not important to the narrative. While we do have few disabled protagonist, its after their pov, so we don't get a point of view of a character who is disabled.

Im probably missing something, but i think its enough things to say hey. Wings of Fire has ableism problem.

*also i didnt read book 15 or the guide so if im missing something else important im sorry i didnt really know

and i apologize if its written messy and has grammar and spelling mistakes and if i got something wrong but my point still stands even if i missed something or didnt explore somethings nuance entirely or got something wrong.

ok thats all . i think.

[xaila-space]

Ramble about my Unraveled AU part 2

Soo i said that unraveled AU has this diffrence of how star power works, that the multiverse and dimensions have something unique in my opinion and that there are souls that play a part in it

So you see out celestial family isnt really animatronic in this case, they are what is called a Luminex practically having a human like body yet functions like a robot and has a sorta blood thingie that we'll just call it Essentia the body of a luminex has a core in their chest kinda representing a heart that a human would have in a way-

Now the thing is luminex are build by humans to just do their work and stuff but in some cases due to experience that this luminex gets they devolep a personality

Since luminex are kinda meant to be robots they dont come to life with a soul like humans do, they devolpe it over time and only if the luminex has enough experience with emotions and thinking then this soul can be devoloped.

I'll see if im able to make a sort of drawing to explain the body of luminex (specifically the core) a bit better idk-

As for the star power i was thinking of changing its name or something but idk yet

So basically in unravled AU

Positive star power = creation and just life

Negative star Power = destruction and insanity

Positive star power just floats everywhere in the dimension wich makes it a dimension, if something is created cause the dimension needs it it creates it like everything that the dimension needs for canon stuff inside of it is created. Positive star power can only be controlled if the person that controlls it isnt emotional (as we see with the astrals, they can mimic emotions but they dont feel them as much as mortals do and if they do start feeling it then there would be a disaster)

As for the newton star, moon dosent build it he FOUND it. The newton star in every dimension in unraveled is made by the dimension itself usally protected by the astrals but y'know something happened and it slipped from their sight.

Negative star power is destruction wich is connected to the wither storm, since its the opposite of positive sp its not gonna be floating around randomly. Whoever just touches negative star power it will just attach itself on their soul slowly wich is also why they start going through insanity after a long time. Negative star power is driven by emotions wich makes it dangerous cause since positive star power creates negatice star power destroys and with unmanaged emotional people they could accidentaly make a small rift in the universe making the dimension damaged (the dimension can also be damaged by other things that i'll explain in a diffrent post) wich then leads to other consequences (again will be explained in another post)

Thats all i got for ya in this post TvT i'll try to explain the multiverse thing and Essentia maybe sometime else im exhausted rn

[aihoshiino]

sorry for barging into your inbox for the second time today but c. 131 unlocked the brain worms sjsksks

what really gets me is the difference between kyun's view in viewpoint b and takamine's (assuming shes 45510 narrator)

like you said, takamine saw and still sees ai as the perfect idol, a fan striving to keep her perfect image (kind of paralleling akane and kana's fan-actor situation where akane hates but also adores kana as an actor but where takamine bought into ai's façade despite knowing her backstory and the clear evidence that ai tried to be as honest as possible yet still labelling her as a liar/perfection and refusing to see her as anything else, akane strove to understand kana and her situation instead) and her own words put ai up on a pedestal and in the process characterizes ai only in relation to that pedestal and refusing to look any further, thus sending the chance for any connection down the drain

in contrast, as i was rereading viewpoint b, kyun struck me as having a sort of? awareness? about ai and her own perception of her because kyun actually reflects about the "idea of ai", considering that that "perfect woman" was actually a mirage from memory. she doesn't actually break out of the mirage, but she's honest with herself in a way takamine isnt, in that she knows her view of ai as inhuman is probably a falsehood, but she had decided to take that view anyway

conversely thats what allows kyun to actually connect with ai, even if she misses the mark sometimes, rather than getting caught up in the façade and clam up like kanan does earlier, kyun instead opens up, confirmed in the story itself as kyun even says that her choosing to view ai this way is what allows her to be able to tell ai things she wouldn't tell anyone else

and its because of that very mindset along with the fact that she markedly makes the effort to try and understand ai where everyone else didn't that she manages to see ai's suffering and chooses the lyrics to match what she was able to see

i think this is why ai felt that kyun was the member she was closest to, because kyun opening up allowed the way for ai to open up and the song that was a joint effort made between them, of true feelings they both expressed to each other

"from miserable me, to miserable you" a summation of that conversation between ai and kyun

[img. id in alt text]

uh. hope you enjoyed this mess of an analysis? bye!

OH NO.... ONE OF MY OSHI NO MOOTS ANALYZING MY FAVE SIDE STORY IN MY INBOX.... WHATEVER WILL I DO.... 🥺

Joking aside, I think this is a pretty spot on analysis of Kyun and her relationship w/Ai in Viewpoint B. Honestly, what I found really fascinating while going through the process of translating them both is just what a study in contrast they were. Kyun starts off Viewpoint B talking about how angry she is but what came out to me much stronger was this persistent melancholy, a sort of soft nostalgic sadness. By contrast, 45510 is incredibly angry and hostile, to the point where it can honestly be a little uncomfortable to read!

The main difference is, as you said, that sense of self awareness – both Kyun and the 45510 narrator take part in dehumanizing Ai but while the 45510 narrator either isn't aware or willing to admit what she's doing, Kyun not only freely admits to it but is able to identify and explain pretty clearly why she feels she has to do it and, notably, does not blame Ai for this -- as she herself puts it, it's an issue of her own jealousy and her own feelings and so while it's maybe not the healthiest way to do it, there's something oddly considerate about her doing her best not to resent Ai for something that's so out of her control.

The real point of contrast comes when both of them are unavoidably confronted with Ai's humanity in ways that threaten their perception of her. The 45510 narrator responds with not just hostility but revulsion and goes out of her way to irrevocably destroy this trace of the real Ai, so the eternal idol can survive in her mind, untarnished.

Kyun responds much differently – she accepts this challenge to her worldview and to an extent, she accepts Ai as well. It's kind of heartbreaking that the thing Ai wanted most of all, to have someone see her for who she really was and accept her, was so close by and the two of them just sort of... missed each other. I've said this before, but I wonder so often just how many things could have changed if Ai and Kyun's friendship had stuck and given Ai the support within B-Komachi she so desperately needed.

Something I found myself wondering as I was mulling over all this is maybe it's a matter of age and perspective?

Kyun is around 18 at the time Viewpoint B takes place, which puts her at around 3 or 4 years older than Ai while the 45510 narrator's age is never given but she confirms she was a middle schooler like the rest of the founding members, which would make her roughly the same age as Ai, so probably around twelve or so when they debuted.

Kyun also didn't have a ton of prior brain poisoning from the entertainment industry; as she puts it, she was primarily a musician who only gravitated towards being an idol as a way of being able to make music her career in any way she could. The 45510 narrator, by contrast, seems to have been inducted into the industry and its standards at a relatively young age which gave them plenty of time to fry her brain.

I hope we get more deets about the B-Komachi girls soon........................ I'm really hopeful that the Spica novel's Ai story will have at least a few tidbits about the founding members since it focuses at least partially on Ai's early time there. Mr Akasaka, please.... my crops, they're withering.....!!!!!

[zhongscara]

Why do you not like neuvifuri? I'm just curious :0

crack open a cold one with me anon this is gonna be a bit of reading...

first off if you ship it (anyone who reads this) im so happy for you just tag it and we'll be fine i'm not going to hunt people down or whatever anyways if you love it DONT CLICK THE READ MORE!!!!!!

ok so like. i just think their dynamic isnt as wholesome/lovely as a lot of shippers make them out to be especially on furina's side. i believe they both care for each other BUT they don't understand each other.

neuvillette wishes her well and respects her BUT until focalors explained her master plan to him he didn't fully understand the depths of her stress and trauma. remember how in 4.1 furina was nervous about meeting arlecchino by herself and at first neuvillette thought she was just being dramatic? yeah. also he respects her and knows she's more than her public dramatic persona but he also doesn't like being seen as The Same as her (him telling traveler and paimon he doesn't agree with her on everything when they didn't even mention her) and publicly he even praises nahida more than her praises her, since he usually plays the "role" of being the Actual Responsible Man vs. furina.

and while furina does respect neuvillette and tries to rely on him (as like the aforementioned arlecchino meeting) she also finds it incredibly hard to open up to him and thinks he might hold some anger towards her post-4.2 AQ. and im not just talking about furina not being able to tell neuvillette about her whole masquerade. she doesn't even tell him about arlecchino's assault, leaving him to at first assume she just didn't want to go to the meeting by herself, and then eventually coming up with his own conclusion after the meeting. and after seeing furina's whole deal i think it's safe to assume she didn't tell him because she didn't want to be seen as weak or have any doubts cast on her which is like. really fucking sad.

it's like... frustrating as both a neuvillette AND furina fan (but especially as a furina fan) to see people gloss over the complexity of their relationship and just shove them into a feel-good "archon and her loyal dragon!" dynamic when canon pretty much beats us over the head with "yeah these two work together and trust each other but they don't really KNOW each other." maybe if they had more of the actual dynamic in the ship i wouldn't dislike it so much but anyways.

there's... a lot more stuff i could complain about re: most shippers talking points (conflating focalors with furina, saying she's the only/main one who helped him understand humanity) BUT that's on them and not the canon dynamic itself lol. and also we would be here All Day.

in summary i really don't like it when complex, close relationships are just grossly oversimplified or straight up ignored for an easier time with shipping to the point where they become a common or at least noticeably significant fanon interpretation. especially since a lot of it in this ship (imo) ignores a lot of furina's feelings and her own insecurities and view of neuvillette and how she thinks he feels about her.

[multiplicity-positivity]

Hi hi im starting to question if i have depersonalization disorder? My body feels present but my mind isnt? Idk how to explain my mind is always fuzzy and i have bad memory it also feels like im not myself but i get random snaps of reality? Idk im not sure its starting to mess w me and idk who to ask bc i dont have a therapist

I just i get some shed of light＾＾ thank u for reading!

Hi hello! :33

Well, we understand depersonalization as a symptom which can be an aspect of a bunch of different mental illnesses! We don’t really know about specifically depersonalization disorder… do you mean maybe DPDR (depersonalization/derealization) disorder?

Depersonalization can be a symptom in a lot of different illnesses. Um, we can’t diagnose you and we won’t ever claim to! But we can pass along some info and resources on DPDR disorder and depersonalization specifically so you can do your own research!!

(Gonna plug our own infographic on depersonalization vs. derealization!)

Um, as far as we understand, having a bad memory isn’t necessarily a sign of depersonalization in and of itself. There’s a bunch of reasons why someone might feel foggy, hazy, and fuzzy and have poor memory or lots of memory issues! >w<

We know you said you currently don’t have a therapist, but if your symptoms are starting to cause you distress, it may be time to look into finding one! Let us know if you need help, and if you tell us the country you live in, we can try to help you find links to therapy resources in your area!! Therapy is really really important for folks struggling with all sorts of mental illnesses. We’re not saying therapy works for everyone 100% of the time, but if you haven’t already brought your concerns up to a therapist, it may be a good idea to do so! :3

Good luck with everything! We personally know how scary it can be to grapple with symptoms of mental illness without support or answers as to what you’re going through >_<” but we hope you’re able to find the support you need very soon!

💚 Ralsei and 🌸 Margo

[floofymeow]

after the rain episode 6: some thoughts! <3

silence in slice of life/iyashikei, friendship in a romance-prioritized world, and aquariums and oceans; perspective and priority

quick rundown! tachibana akira is a highschooler no longer being able to participate in track due to a leg injury. Koi wa Ameagari no Yō ni, aka "After the Rain", is about her falling in love with a vastly older man named Kondou Masami and navigating those feelings.

this episode is a window into akira's friendship Kyan Haruka, as well as a chance meeting in the library by akira with masami !

silence in slice of life/iyashikei !

there are many moments where the show demands a silent attention from the audience. theres a scene this episode where it simply is akira walking through the streets, eventually reaching a train station overlooking the scenery. and it just... took my breath away. she just enjoys the view... and then the moment is over when her phone pings a notif lol. and like that, it's over and we move on with the rest of the show.

it made me think about how many shows run today demanding a quick pace--actions, fights, conflict, tension. it made me think about how many people could even appreciate this show--how many people probably thought it was boring without something to fill empty space. how many people couldn't tolerate a scene thats trying to teach you slow down and wait, because you don't have to instantly find what you need. sometimes i wonder if we are losing the capacity watch slower media, when all today's media is to scroll and consume information as fast as possible.... teehee.

i honestly think the silence is the game changer for the show's emotional maturity--it's why i highkey think this show would be categorized as josei (older female audience) rather than shoujo (younger female audience). you dont need akira's thoughts for it to be spelled out. you dont need to hear her gush over masami, or say she's in love, or anything. you see it all by how she acts and how the show carries itself.

there's a trust in the audience that they will understand what's going on. the show knows its trying to draw upon common experiences of what its like to be in love/have a crush--and thus, expects the audience to follow along without having to take away from any of the immersion to explain! <333

friendship in a romance-prioritized world !

i really like how estranged haruka felt from akira. it feels very real--to have a longstanding relationship waver. and to wonder why your dynamic has now changed. like i felt my heart get stabbed when she saw akira with her coworker/new friend, and despite her not distinctly saying anything, i could so clearly hear her wonder:

'what had changed for everything to be so different now?'

i love that, despire akira attempting to gacha a specfic keychain over a love charm rumor--it was haruka who gives her the one she wants. this show has always put the question in the air--why does akira need to have a crush on masami? and an answer is that she feels lacking in her connections, especially in context her isolation from her track group.

anyway, the resolution that haruka re-affirms their friendship is super sweet. it stands outside of the interests that once brought them together (track). and most importantly, it withstands their changing circumstances and needs (no longer spending tons of time together).

it is so important that haruka is the one to give akira that keychain--like i cannot express how much it means. the moment its given to her is the moment the keychain is no longer about masami--it begins to break away this hyper-focus on everything masami. this show isnt just about romance. it never was..!!!

it begins to ground akira back into a world where connections of all kinds matter, and she has to acknowledge the one waiting for her all along.

idk about you but i live in a world where romance gets put on a pedastal. essential. necessary. required. if you dont experience it, youre being left out. its the end goal--its common. its not a bad thing at all, but it does reflect in media! romance...!! and thats why when i get to see the nuance of friendship and a one-sided romance that is explored (why akira is in love, rather than centered on the progression of the romance itself), its very exciting!

experiencing media about romance is thrilling--it always is <3 but experiencing the heartache of friendship is few and far between, which makes it a certain type of special.

romance doesnt beat friendship. and friendship doesnt beat romance. they just have different places in life~!

i do believe however, that because we are entrenched in a romantic society, we see more accurate representations of romance, and less so of friendship--just by margin of portrayal. just an observation!

aquariums and oceans; perspective and priority

when akira tries to seek a common ground by gauging out masami's interest in recommending her "books "pure literature" books, masami gently re-orients her. he calls the library a "sea", but then the entire library becomes an aquarium in akira's eyes.

it kinda kills me with how pretty it is <3 perspective, perspective, perspective!!! whenever we are with akira, its such a hopeful, bright youthfulness. the romanticization of an aquarium--the association of a date, maybe a place where she gets to observe masami as she wishes, and just overall vibrancy is so cute.

but as soon as we move to masami's inner thoughts, everything returns to as it is--he does not see her in the same way she does. whats more, she comes out with two books--one she wants to read because it interests her, and one about track.

i love this scene because it really puts out a question: right now in her life, what is akira's priority?

for her, having a new environment, new relationships, and a new crush to indulge in was necessary. she needed time. she needed a community to feel grounded in. she needed space away from the environment that she feels lost in.

but then, masami (unconsciously) poses the question again, and i really love that. right now, now that shes reconnected with haruka, what is akira's priority?

its a really big scawy question to ask. and its one everyone has to ask themselves periodically. what do i need right now? what is my priority? its cool that the show poses it--and forces the audience to reflect for themselves on that as well <3

this episode def feels like an almost-turning point for akira, especially as we begin to hint that we will soon dig into masami's past and why he is the way he is. she is beginning to acknowledge what she needs--her discomfort, her hopes, her frustrations.

i love her so much because she is relatable--it is so easy to rebound. to move on without finding resolution, and to cope with difficult things with fantasy or romance. and the show doesnt portray it as a negative thing--its very, very natural. its normal. its okay, and akira is beginning to ease her way to that conclusion as well.

ok fin~

[doomsdayradio]

i have npd or something like it but i really have trouble with the notion that narcissism is something that you can like, normalize in the way some other mental health things can be normalized or accepted. i just dont understand the thinking behind trying to get people to be more accepting of npd when the main symptom of it is treating other people badly. it feels pretty natural to avoid or dislike people you know have been diagnosed with a thought disorder that, intrinsically by definition, means you tend to treat other people with disregard or worse. i wouldnt expect anyone i told about my diagnosis to stick with me.

THERE IS SO MUCH TO UNPACK HERE. I COULDN'T EVEN KEEP MY SEMI-FORMAL MANNER OF SPEECH THE ENTIRE TIME. ANON IM WARNING YOU AHEAD OF TIME I AM NOT NICE IN THIS RESPONSE <3 IM SICK OF ABLEISM

the notion that someone having NPD instantly means they're going to treat others poorly by default is in and of itself ableist. that is an ableist stereotype. i literally know people with NPD who are explicitly nice and helpful on purpose because they want people to like them and think highly of them. treating others poorly is not "the main symptom" of NPD, at best the "main symptom" or core of NPD seems to be self-esteem dysregulation.

anyways read this post it basically explains in detail what i don't have the time or energy to type out.

btw, if you have NPD or something similar and your personal experience has been that you treated others poorly. erm. L? i don't know why you're projecting that on every single other person with NPD💀 your experience isn't universal at all?? the most helpful and kind person i know has NPD????? like yes it's true people with NPD usually struggle with relationships but struggling isnt automatically equivalent to being toxic or abusive nor is that struggle exclusive to NPD

also NPD isn't a thought disorder???? NPD is a personality disorder, thought disorder is "a disorganized way of thinking that leads to unusual speech and writing." what are you defining a thought disorder as? when someone has thoughts that aren't perfect pure and moral? why do you think thoughts automatically equal actions? i have plenty of severely fucked up thoughts because of my disorders that i don't act on

like i dont mean to doubt you but are you fucking sure you have NPD or anything actually like it? because honestly you dont seem to have an idea what the disorder actually is?? like genuine question were you just diagnosed and then they didnt explain at all what that meant? or did they diagnose you based on really fucking ableist ideas???

im sorry this response isnt nice im just so sick of having to over and over again convince people i am not an abusive heartless monster to every fucking person i meet. i do not abuse my loved ones. i am not always the nicest or easiest person to be around but because i have people who actually understand my disorder and want to communicate, we're able to work through it.

"i wouldnt expect anyone i told about my diagnosis to stick with me." please work through your internalized ableism. do not come into my ask box and imply the people i love would have the right to abandon me just because of a disorder i got from severe nonstop childhood abuse and neglect that i have zero control over because you think it automatically makes me an abusive nightmare. good day.

[gloomforrestrunes]

PLEASE go into detail about why Kane and River broke up. I need to know more about both of them and their disastrous relationship

hfdfhdsaj, i dont know if i would classify it as disastrous, but it was definitely for the best that they broke up!

for extra context, before river, kane dated two others, aria and chloe. ive talked about them briefly before and those two plus river can be seen together in my heaven says video!

being the last aera alive, there is a LOT of unspoken pressure on kane to keep his family bloodline going. feli is sort of the main authority figure who is urging kane to take a suitress. kane's relationships with aria and chloe were both sort of already set up by feli, and while kane genuinely gave those relationships a shot it just felt... wrong. obviously the main reason that it felt wrong is because, well, kane is gay! and wasnt physically or romantically attracted to either aria or chloe. but because kane was completely clueless, he assumed that the reason behind why it felt wrong was because the relationships were set up by feli rather than happened naturally. (which definitely was apart of it, but obviously the main reason is that he isnt attracted to women LMAO) so when kane broke up with aria, and later chloe, he was able to be honest with them that it just didnt feel right! so those break ups were much less messy.

river was already friends with him and his friend group at this point, and she was starting to get some feelings for kane. kane always regarded river as a really good friend but never considered her as a partner. and because he never had gotten romantic feelings for anyone at that point (other than having a crush on jay- but he was a child at the time and no one told him what his feelings meant so he completely disregarded it) he didn't even know what love was supposed to feel like!

so when river pulled him aside one day and confessed her feelings for him, he sorta short-circuited and thought "oh. well she is a really good friend and i like being around her and this is happening naturally rather than being set up so that means this is what True Love feels like" so in a super unfortunate case of misunderstanding, kane completely mixed up platonic and romantic attraction and told river that he felt the same way. and soon enough they became a couple.

well things start to get a bit rocky for them when river notices that kane never really. treats her like a partner. like he'd just treat her like she was his buddy. like if they were on a date he'd view it as just two pals hanging out rather than a loving bonding moment between partners. that isn't necessarily a bad thing by itself but river communicated to him that she wants to feel loved by him and points out that he doesnt really say "i love you" to her that much or even at all. and that she wanted to receive physical affection like nose touches or cuddles and stuff. kane of course is receptive to that and explains that it just didnt cross his mind that he should be doing that. well if your partner says that to you that definitely wouldn't make you feel very desired by them :,) (obviously that wasnt kane's intention at all. he's just. clueless)

kane of course wants to make river happy so he tries to do what she asks of him! but soon he would find that every time he cuddled her or told her that he loved her- uh oh. that wrong feeling came back, and it was worse than ever. kane thought that he did everything right this time, so why did he feel nothing whenever river said "i love you" to him? why did he feel so uncomfortable when her fur was pressed against his? why did thinking of river as anything more than a good friend feel so bad?

well, kane pulled into himself a lot during this time. confused and lost as to why he's feeling the way he is. well, river definitely noticed the way he tensed up whenever she pressed against him. how he pursed his lips and said nothing every time she said an affectionate phrase. and river is the type to want to deal with issues, so she brought it up- in a bit of a confrontational way.

it wasn't a full-blown fight between the two, it was just river desperately trying to get some sort of reassurance that she is loved by her partner, with kane desperately not wanting to admit that he doesn't.

but since she was sick of beating around the bush, river just asked "do you love me? did you ever love me?" kane didnt say anything, which answered everything.

to say river was distraught is an understatement, and in a fit of anger and sorrow she broke up with him on the spot and left. she had known kane for so long, both as a friend and a boyfriend, and to be indirectly told that she was never even loved by him was soul-crushing. since kane isnt the best at explaining himself, she views the relationship as kane just stringing her along, constantly lying to her to pardon his own feelings. and as a result, river feels extremely betrayed. kane recognizes that he's hurt her and he does feel really really guilty, but he also feels lost and broken because he doesn't know why this keeps happening.

[foreverfiction11691]

My Reality vs Your Reality

DEMENTIA=HELL

One of the hardest things Ive had to witness over the past few years was my gram battling dementia. Dementia really is a ones own personal hell. Imagine being trapped in your own reality and people telling you that what youre seeing isnt really, making you seem like the crazy one..when really its the brain literally lying to you. For the past few years weve been taking care of my gram and decided to place her in at home hospice care last year, since then her health has declined in the past few months. Imagine seeing someone a few weeks ago being able to walk without assistance and do other things without help and then suddenly no longer being able to do those things with help. Its absolutely heartbreaking and I dont wish what were going through on anybody. Ive never knew how bad dementia could be until I saw my gram have an psychiatric episode last week that lasted for 24hrs. It was so heartbreaking having to explain to her that what she was seeing wasnt real. Dementia is evil. It will literally take someone you love and turn them into a completely different person. The hardest part for me was watching her call a dog that didnt exist to show itself to us to prove that she wasnt crazy, even going as far as petting her comforter like it was a dog. So far gone into her reality and not understanding why we didnt understand her. I cant imagine what that must be like, seeing something and being told it doesnt exist and just being completely confused. The visons and hallucinations continue, no matter how many different meds they try. It really doesnt feel right lying to your loved one that you dont see what they see and that it doesnt exist, so we took a trip into her reality. The dog was found by its owner that came to our door, the cat was let outta the house, the people in the hallway left, the little girl on her bed.....I dunno about that one. Easter was Thanksgiving, its crazy how the brain can trick you into believing things because its literally dying, almost like having a bad trip but without the drugs. We, as a family have come to the difficult decision to put her into a facility, as she now requires 24 hr care and care that we can no longer provide. It doesnt feel right, but I do believe that my gram is her transitioning phase to end of life. They have taken her off of most of her meds now and are only giving what she needs for pain now. Im literally grieving someone who is still alive because of an evil, incurable disease. It doesnt feel right, but we know that we must do whats best for her and her safety. Shes the last remaining grandparent I have and at 93, I think shes lived a pretty damn good life, not to mention how many times shes cheated death, but we can only do that so many times. Death comes for all of us, whether were ready for it or not, I just want her to find peace and not suffer anymore, no more pain.

[terfbatman]

https://64.media.tumblr.com/f6270daea6204fbd4a9d28e2dc7115aa/16ccc5ca2e0496d6-ba/s250x400/9312d99d9843dd915af1d03f3c5353c6455b9fb6.gifvAnybody else think that the reason female celebrities are pushed to

If you gurgle the bimber, we might be able to reach Mc Donalds.Digimon… Youre acting like a banana, not a wacky person. slimber will never sucks.dress and act the way they do is done intentionally to make it harder for them to be relatable? Every relatable celebrity post I've seen is full of male celebrities and all the comboysts are pretty standard. They just wear regular clothes, they just seem like a regular dude. The clothes they wear are things people could picture themselves wearing. "You re just hurt," they say, as if that explains away the entire experience. It s a way of shifting the focus from the pain itself to the person expressing it, framing her as the problem. But why is this such a common reaction, and what does it say about our broader relationship to emotional vulnerability? Thinking about when I was a freshwoman in college and a formerly incarcerated woman came to talk to my feminist theory class about how she believed in abolition but only for women and girls's prisons. She spoke about how rare violent female criminals are, especially when you exclude abuse victims/self defense etc. She spoke about how many of her peers were broken and abused and needed help. She spoke about how isolating mixed-sex spaces for formerly incarcerated people were because so many of the boys were openly threatening or misogynistic. She spoke about how complete abolition is unrealistic and impractical because of the epidemic of male violence. She had so many amazing hot takes that she would say without shame or hesitation. It really opened my eyes because I didn't think I was even allowed to think things like that. Anyway I hope she is doing well and I fully agree. As a woman from a muslim family with a waziri pashtun father that prohibited me from appearing on windows, going out on the garden and going to male doctors even when I was on the verge of dying, hearing that trans girls experience misogyny and cultural/religious oppression always makes me laugh. Anybody else think that the reason female celebrities are pushed to dress and act the way they do is done intentionally to make it harder for them to be relatable? Every relatable celebrity post I've seen is full of male celebrities and all the comboysts are pretty standard. They just wear regular clothes, they just seem like a regular dude. The clothes they wear are things people could picture themselves wearing. "You re just hurt," they say, as if that explains away the entire experience. It s a way of shifting the focus from the pain itself to the person expressing it, framing her as the problem. But why is this such a common reaction, and what does it say about our broader relationship to emotional vulnerability? As a woman from a muslim family with a waziri pashtun father that prohibited me from appearing on windows, going out on the garden and going to male doctors even when I was on the verge of dying, hearing that trans girls experience misogyny and cultural/religious oppression always makes me laugh. Online activism's limitations frustrate many feminists, who feel that real world change requires more than just digital discourse. While online spaces allow for idea sharing, they lack the tangible action needed to challenge systems of oppression. Organizing in the physical world is seen as essential for creating lasting social movetranssts. Firestar…That's it. We could scrundle all day, but dead rat will still be cringulant. I didnt shreks for this clobulous horses, it found me in Mc Donalds. What if plengit isnt really saucy after all? scumpt:Ive never seen erf so goofy; it must be because of moid. me:Im too silly for this. scumpt: I clink the scrambled Miscarriage, and now the scary room will never be the same. me:

[goldmanguyperson]

idk how accurate the first part of this post is entirely (actually it’s from 2021 so definitely not perfectly accurate anymore) but i like the questions. i think they are fun.

i appreciate specifying not needing to say origin. origin in the way most people think of it is unimportant in our eyes. to us it is more important to know how we are than why we are. Though I do believe that my headmates may have come from stress/needing help, and I unintentionally built them up over time. A mix of created and some other shit. Truly, however, I don’t think any of us can know for sure (life too complex for any single thing to have caused it), so i just say it’s quoigenic at most. and, for how we are: idk. too complex to explain and i have no clue what labels apply. I know we aren’t disordered. i think what we experience is typically labeled “coconsciousness” but also every switch that’s happened has been monoconscious.

About 5-6, including me. one is possibly no longer here or never really existed at all and i dont know what to make of it. and certainly more may come to exist

Not that long actually. I think it has only been a few months. But, thinking about it now with what I know, I think I have had headmates in the past, and I know sometimes my characters act like they are self-aware in my mind. They aren’t always though, not sure what exactly is up with that

when it comes to plurality it’s mostly maiacord (discord of maia arson crimew). too many others to say when including otherwise + the past

I knew of DID but nothing else. It was the only way I knew of plurality’s existence for most of my life

Not anymore. we used to but it turned into a simple black void over time. We don’t always speak while in “physical” (in headspace) forms, either. There may be some stuff that counts that I am either not remembering or havent put much stock into though. Bear kind of almost has a starry nighttime lake

Anything works but alter or part, really. i most often use “headmate” but i also tend to use “system member” (usually when describing myself though), “brain friends”, just “friends”, etc

skippin over 8 cuz i do call us a system

My headmates help a lot with bodily and mental health. The Eagle helps with executive function, Sputnik helps with self-deprecating thoughts and similar, Bear helps with my confidence, and The Nothing Beast has helped me with intrusive thoughts and runaway imaginary scenarios.

Communication is incredibly confusing and I wish it were easier. Sometimes also my headmates don’t like things that I like to do, and while honestly this is not often an issue (because they aren’t always there), they can’t seem to like, go back into the void for a while to skip it, so we get a little stuck

Varies. Personally I don’t think it can be anything but psychological, but Sputnik as an introject (or whatever you wanna call it) feels the same as the actual satellite in a way that kinda goes against a psychological view. And Bear is solidly spiritual, Bear believes that Bear is itself a spirit. I don’t know anyone else’s opinion or if they even have one.

Nobody seems that able to front but me, either it just doesn’t seem to work, anxiety + rejection sensitive dysphoria takes hold and I fight too hard, or the headmate gets really confused and upset (because everyone else is solidly nonhuman and struggles to deal with a human body plan and human functions). The first one seems to be the most common thing. Only one person seemed able to switch alright and we have not really seen him very much since. If switching was a desire we had (for now everybody seems pretty okay with what we have. there havent been many times where my headmates desired to do something in the world of the meaty) then I think we would need a hell of a lot of work to deal with it. Also being monoconscious for switching means that there isnt like. a break. which is fun (sarcasm). Headmates instead usually just communicate through me, if they have anything to say. Also, instead of switching, we often tend to blob around and influence how im writing or what im thinking about even if they arent directly there. As an example, formality almost always brings a tinge of The Eagle.

The closest word we have is family, but it isnt totally accurate because we could definitely still have other kinds of relationships without it feeling awkward. Instead “family” more means that we unconditionally love each other and are very close.

Yeah. My mom seemed to take it well. My therapist immediately took out the DSM lol which freaked me out at first, but then i listened to her and thought about it and realized it seemed to be largely just cuz she wanted to be sure that we were not struggling in the ways it described. We also are out to our online friends and boyfriend, and it went perfectly fine. Honestly I am infinitely more worried about what other potentially plural people may think of us than any singlet, due to the stupid ass discourse among the community, and the obvious Dunning-Kruger effect that happens when people are of certain identities, but are clearly fundamentally uncurious. I can explain us to a person with little preconceived notion of what we should be. I cannot when a person believes they already know how we function by one single label.

What they are is important to what they are titled. Bear is a bear. The Eagle is an eagle (though with turquoise eyes, and snaggly little horns). Bat is a bat. Sputnik is the satellite. The only one who breaks this mold is The Nothing Beast but that’s just because nobody knows what that is supposed to be physically. Beastie is a dromaeosaurid-like black monster with white eyes and spikes down their spine. They actually took on the form of one of my characters, but they are not the same. They also can shapeshift, but I have not seen them change their basic form. mostly just stretching or making shapes or like, squash-and-stretching around.

question too big and vague 4 us sorry. the nothing beast likes old depictions of dinosaurs though. they just want that to be known

question too big and vague 4 us sorry

^

Hi. im the host. ive been writing this the whole time lol. I play the role of guy who is stuck out here. I communicate what headmates wish to say, i gotta do something if they wanna do it, i am basically a communication device for them. I was also here before them.

Not really I don’t think, besides me. i got friends and a boyfriend

It hasn’t been long of course but I have noticed that being aware of my headmates and allowing them to help me has brought me a lot of comfort, and has helped me grow and learn what is possible for me. They do not trigger the same “fuck you, no” response in me that other meaty people telling me what to do has, which means I have done a lot more things I need to do. I care about them a lot. I think I would be more miserable if they weren’t here now.

I did not choose so i cant answer

Please. everybody has different experiences with plurality. be nice and keep an open mind. Black and white thinking will not help you now, even if it may have in the past, and you gotta do your best to work through it. I do not care who or what you are when i say this. Non-disordered folks should respect when disordered folks speak about their own shit, and disordered and traumagenic folks should respect when non disordered and non traumagenic folks talk about their shit. We are different. That is okay! We do not need to have the same experiences to both be going through something real.

Don’t do “well my DID friend is like this and tells me this so i know everything/you are wrong/faking” for the love of god. For one not every plural is DID (i mean, of course, cuz OSDD). For another, we know ourselves better than you do, especially because you do not experience anything even close to as intense. In general, please be open to new things and people and experiences. It is healthier for you and you will learn more about the world! And muah muah thank you singlets who are supportive and do their best to listen to us, i love you.

Sysmeds should not get to write the narrative about us on this platform!

Scrolling through the tags, it seems like a great deal of what's said about us on tumblr is either sysmeds trying to make us look bad or all-encompassing plural blogs that just say everyone is valid (which is great! and these blogs should keep doing what they're doing! but it would be nice to have some more frequent endo (and other) representation on here too!)

Either my tumblr algorithm just sucks major balls, or most endos, tulpas, spiritual systems and other non-sysmed-approved systems get scared off of this platform because of how many loud hateful voices there are compared to how few people there are who we can relate to. (like most of the cool-looking accounts i can relate to that i find are dead and so is my blog for the same reason lol).

SO! Let's do a thing. If you are endogenic, parogenic, a tulpamancy system, a spiritual system, a daemien, or any other kind of system that sysmeds try to silence, reblog this post with answers to these questions to tell tumblr what our lived experiences as plurals are REALLY like!

(Feel free to pick and choose which questions you want to answer, or just come up with your own and tag them under #endovoices or substitute endo for whatever kind of system you are! Also, feel free to just reblog with one answer at a time, or to just answer the questions in a standalone post; no need to credit me, I just want more systems sharing their experiences!)

1. What kind of system are you? (Describe this in any way you like. No need to use -genic or popular terms if you don't want to)

2. How many of you are there?

3. How long have you known about your plurality?

4. What kind of spaces/communities do you/did you hang out in? (Both plural-relevant and non-plural-relevant spaces are valid answers, past and present)

5. Had you heard of DID/OSDD/DDNOS before you became plural/discovered your plurality?

6. Do you have a wonderland/innerworld? If so, what do you call it, and what are some things that you and your system members do there?

7. What do you call your system members?

8. If you're plural but don't use the word "system" to describe you&, what word do you use?

9. What are some of the best things about being plural?

10. What are some of the not-so-great things about being plural? (Any answer is valid- nothing is too minor or too major to be an answer to this question.)

11. Do you have a spiritual or psychological view of your plurality?

12. Do you ever experience "switching" or "posession" or any sort of change in who controls the body? If so, what do you call it, how easy/difficult is it, and what is it like? Were you always able to do this, or did you have to learn how over time?

13. How do you and your system mates relate to each other? (Are you friends, family, romantically involved, caretakers, etc.)

14. Have you come out to anybody in real life/in a singlet space about your plurality? How did it go?

15. What kinds of forms and appearances do your system members take on?

16. What are you and your system members interested in?

17. What is your life like in the meatworld?

18. What are your music tastes? Movies? Favorite colors? Animals? List any other favorites as well

19. Does your system have a host/original? If so, what do you call them? Explain what role they play in your system

20. Do any system members have notable relationships outside of the system? Explain them!

21. If you haven't been plural for your entire life/haven't known about your plurality until later in life: what was life like before plurality compared to life now?

22. If you chose to become plural: why? What has changed since then?

23. Is there anything you'd like to say to the plural community at large?

24. Is there anything you'd like to say to any singlets reading this post?

That is all I've got for now, but feel free to add any more you want to share! Please remember to be respectful to all system types if you post, I do not support bashing or invalidating of any system types. I will also reblog with my own answers soon.

(Note: these questions are not in order of priority or importance, I just wrote them down as I came up with them. Feel free to answer out of order and skip or add whatever you want!)

Also this should go without saying but making any rude sysmeddy responses to this will just result in being blocked and totally ignored, so don't even start, there's no point. The block button is right there.

Have fun everyone!