#but that feels silly when there are so many options to explore

[vigilskeep]

the problem with playing someone other than sol is that (fairly obviously) my brain has fixated on the crows. so by playing a crow and romancing the crow on my first run i have made it difficult for a second one to capture my interest since i would not have either of those things. i may just have to keep replaying sol until this burns out and some other aspect grabs me

[droolypupboy]

tips for solo puppy play!!

pup play doesn’t have to be a partnered activity and solo play can be EXTREMELY fulfilling. you deserve to explore your headspace 🫶🫶 i have another post for more general tips for feeling more puppy, you can check that out here, a lot of things on there are ALSO applicable for solo pups.

warning, this is not for puppy regressors!! this is an nsfw post and probably not safe for u if you regress while online. stay safe, sfw puppies.

i would recommend checking out the above post if you want more details on the following: playing fetch alone, puppy snacks, & oral fixation!! all those things can help a LOT for solo pups but since i already went into so much detail previously, this post will have its own unique set of tips. i’m a puppy & i own a puppy sub so im super smart and you should listen 2 me!!!!

🐾 eating from a dog bowl can help a lot!! but even if that is inaccessible or not to your taste, you can just sit/lay on your tummy on the ground and eat small snacks from a plate. be careful of choking if you choose to lay!!

🐾 make little pup noises!! if you feel yourself going nonverbal and you’re in a place where you’re safe and comfy and have the time, lean into it. make little “hmph” noises when you’re confused, little squeaks when you’re excited, whine and pant, do all the things!! these can be used both sexually and nonsexually. it should come naturally if it’s gonna happen but there’s nothing wrong with doing it on purpose to get the ball rolling.

🐾 you can either invest in a large dog bed OR you can make a little nest of pillows and blankets.

🐾 being on all fours, sitting on the floor, & laying on your tummy are wonderful. inaccessible?? that’s okay!! these are enhancers, not necessities.

🐾 ALL you need for this is a bedroom and some random items. find some things (bad options are things like keys, lighters, phones, anything you use super frequently) to hide and go find again. the more space you have the better but even in smaller spaces, it can be VERY fun to lean into.

🐾 tilt your head in confusion, nudge and “paw” at things, nip and bite at things (safely, clean things, nothing that could hurt you or that you could choke on).

🐾 if you can afford it, invest in a knot style toy. it can help a lot in feeling like you’re small getting used by a bigger dog if that’s your thing. toys with suction cups are amazing too, the less you have to work, the better!!

🐾 do NOT be afraid to use pup centered asmr. it’s available on many many places but most accessibly, youtube & soundgasm through the site flaru. its not cringe, its not silly, it can be rlly good for the headspace. if you’re not sure if you’ll like it, give it a go!! why not??

🐾 invest in dog toys if you can!! make sure to clean them thoroughly before putting them in your mouth, stored r nasty, don’t use any that an actual dog has used only use fresh ones. if you can’t do that, chewelry, largely available on etsy and marketed for sensory issues (which yes, it does work for as well) is a really nice & discreet option.

🐾 go to town if you have a PRIVATE back yard!! run around!! have the zoomies!! chase toys (do not put them in your mouth if you’re playing outside)!! just have a good time.

🐾 press your nose against the window and watch the birds & squirrels & any other animals outside!!

🐾 overstimulation!! it’s rlly good, lose yourself, don’t stop until you can’t take it anymore. silly pups need to get fucked stupid.

🐾 slobber on toys (of the sfw AND nsfw variety), suck your fingers, get messy eating a popsicle or something similar. spit can be VERY puppy if you can handle the mess

that’s all for now, silly pups!! have fun, play safe, be kind to yourself, and remember that all of us puppies are different and unique. what makes one person feel puppy might not make the next person feel puppy. figure out what works for YOU. being puppy is an independent journey 🐕🦴🐾🎾

[rivetgoth]

The fact that I’ve seen a few people try to analyze I Saw the TV Glow through a lens of it being about like, fandom and obsession with media and nostalgia being bad ?? is genuinely blowing my mind. Obviously there’s the fact that this movie is as unambiguously about being trans as it can possibly be without just saying outright “this is a movie about being trans” but I also think this is crazy because I would say it actually has one of the most unambiguously positive relationships with concepts like “media consumption” and “nostalgia” that I’ve seen in a movie.

Like, to say it’s a shallow interpretation of the film to call it “about media/fandom” (and especially a negative depiction of such things!) is putting it quite kindly because I kind of feel that anyone who utters such sentiments didn’t actually understand the core element of the entire movie: “The Pink Opaque” is not a show. Commentary the film makes about watching “The Pink Opaque” cannot translate to commentary on watching shows broadly because the movie spends half its runtime making it explicitly clear that “The Pink Opaque” may be a show that exists in a literal sense but is not one in a figurative sense. “The Pink Opaque” represents the possibilities of childhood and innocence. Innocence that still is not free from judgment—Owen gets told the show is for girls, Maddy’s friend accuses her of sexual harassment on account of her sexuality while they were watching it together—but it’s the moment in your youth (or any time! it doesn’t have to go away!) when the possibility of queerness and more explicitly queer utopia feels real to you. The external pressures to conform are still there but you can tune them out if just for a moment to envision a future and a life for yourself free of it and living authentically. I think this is an experience all LGBT people can relate to, but in the case of ISTTVG it’s very explicitly primarily focusing on queer femininity, predominantly transfemininity, but in Maddy’s case as well she is a queer woman (I’ve seen some interpretations of her as transmasculine but I disagree personally). Hence the on-the-nose nature of it being PINK.

What feels very genius about Schoenbrun making it about a show though is that it’s so generational, right? For all of us LGBT people who grew up in the age of screens that WAS where a lot of that early imagination going wild resided. The first time you explore a new name is on anonymous forums. The first time you explore your masculinity or femininity is with which character you relate to in a show, or which gender you select in Pokémon. Movies and shows with “queer subtext” or even without give young LGBT people the chance to envision relationships and futures for themselves, what many grow up and call “shipping.” You have your first gay crush while watching your favorite movies. You envy those of your true gender while watching your favorite movies. Amongst many other things when Maddy watches “The Pink Opaque” she’s given access to a world where two women share this intimate connection and overcome obstacles together. When Owen watches “The Pink Opaque” they’re given access to a world where femininity is a real option for their future.

The relationship these characters have to “The Pink Opaque” is a net positive and the movie makes that so incredibly obvious when Owen goes back to rewatch it later and finds that it’s nothing like how they remembered, it feels childish and immature and dumb. That is a bad thing. This is a bad thing. The movie wants you to see this as a bad thing. This is the result of repression, of conversion therapy, of violent coercion into normative lifestyle—That sense of limitless possibility is destroyed and the idea of accessing one’s transness, of imagining this utopia where you CAN be yourself and live as a woman, strong and beautiful on the other side of the screen as said in the film, is lost. Now you tell yourself it feels silly, it feels childish to imagine such things, it’s not nearly as deep and meaningful as you believed it was when you were younger and less inhibited, or it’s at the very least easier to tell yourself that. Owen’s feeling embarrassed is of note here. If it weren’t for these external pressures that have been internalized they very well may have been able to still enjoy the show, even as they’ve aged and grown and matured, even if their perspective has changed a little. But they can’t. Not yet, at least.

I feel kind of out of my mind seeing people try to approach it through a lens of commentating on media consumption because it’s so deeply missing the layers of what’s actually being said… and not even in a wildly obfuscated way. The movie is ABOUT the relationship these characters have to “The Pink Opaque” and how the loss of that is a bad thing. How you can possibly watch it and see it being about some kind of growth from obsessive media consumption is mind boggling to me. Seeing multiple reviews and posts in tags about it is crazy. One thing I really like about this movie is that it so confidently argues for a more positive interpretation of being obsessed with “fantasy” and the childlike wonder of the limitless possibilities of fiction. I think that’s a very very trans narrative, as I mentioned it feels tied deeply into Queer Utopia, and I find it much more bold of a stance to take. In a world where people tell trans individuals (and especially trans women) that their identities are works of fiction or products of the imagination or even caused by excessive media consumption, to embrace these things and turn them over and use them as a symbol of the whimsy and innocence and excitement that first ignites that spark as a positive, thrilling, beautiful thing is very cool.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

TW: CSA

Hello great sex witch! I experienced sexual abuse for many years, starting when I was really young and lasting well into high school. As I'm unpacking that it feels like so much of my understanding around sex and sexuality came from my abusers (and from the people in my life who blamed me instead of them), and as I'm sorting through all that stuff and filing it away where it's *actually* supposed to go I'm realizing that there's... Not much left. The things I thought were attraction or arousal were actually alarm bells, that sort of thing.

Sex just feels so toxic to me, even though I know it can be a healthy expression of love (or even just fun). I'm okay with being aroace if that's just who I am, but it bothers me to think I'm this way because the opportunity for healthy sexual development was *taken* from me.

How can I explore what healthy sexuality means to me without putting myself in danger? Dating or hooking up with people feels scary and has been... just not so great, and I don't want to put myself out there like that just to check if I'm even into it. Porn feels icky for obvious reasons, but it also kind of feels like those are my only options? Then there's the dysphoria about my parts, so the thought of just "poking around and seeing what feels good" is also... Kind of ick.

Idk, this ask feels so long and silly, but I genuinely don't know where to start and I feel stuck. It's cool if there's no good or easy answer, I just hate feeling like I'm missing something obvious that everyone else just intuitively understands.

I guess TLDR is "how do I explore sexuality in a healthy, safe, trauma sensitive way?"

hi anon,

this is what we call "beyond the scope of what a stranger on the internet can responsibly help you navigate via a tumblr ask." I know that's probably disappointing, and I hate to have to turn you down after you were so vulnerable in sharing your experience and worries, but I think it's really important to be honest and upfront about what my limitations are here.

this sounds like something best addressed with a mental health professional who can get to know you personally and help develop a long-term plan to work through this over time. a sex therapist, specialized in issues of sexuality and intimacy, might be the best fit, but ultimately it's your call how you'd like to proceed.

[asheepinthenight]

Talon’s End - Demo

DEMO | DEMO ALT (github) | EXTRAS

Latest update: 12/30/23

Talon's End is a fantasy interactive fiction game about transformation, growth, duty, and love in its many forms. It is written with an adult audience in mind and contains some darker themes, but the demo does not contain any explicit content and should be appropriate for ages 16+. The age rating may change for the full version. Please check CWs when starting the game!

You were never destined to marry for love.

As the third child of the Earl of Eastthorn, your purpose is to marry to your family's advantage, but after one failed engagement already, your prospects are less than promising. So when the Crown calls upon you to infiltrate the lair of an Elven sorcerer in search of a powerful magical weapon, the offer is too good for your family to refuse.

But leaving your respectable home to marry an immortal being of immense power quickly puts you in uncharted territory. Between your secretive, disagreeable spouse and their labyrinthine spire infested with strange creatures, your mission to uncover their secrets is risky from the start. But as you come to know both your partner and your new home at Talon's End, you discover terrors and wonders unlike anything you've known–and the true price of your mission.

Characters and features below the cut:

Hawk (gender-selectable m/f/nb)

Ancient, inscrutable, and ornery, Hawk is your immortal Elven spouse. They are a being of few words, and those words are often less than friendly. You're taking your life into your hands coming to live in their tower and spy on them. But are they perhaps kinder than they let on? Or are they just as dangerous as they first appear?

Shea (gender-selectable m/f/nb)

Shea is the outgoing and kindhearted owner of the general store in town. Through their regular deliveries to Hawk's tower, they've gotten to know Hawk- -and now, you. They seem eager to make you feel welcome in your new home. But do they have other motives? Or is their compassion genuine?

Current demo features:

Player character with customizable gender, pronouns, romantic/physical attraction, etc.

Relationships with Hawk and Shea can be romantic, platonic, physical, or a combination; plus, a poly triad option!

Options to explore the player character's gender and attraction beyond initial choices

Choice-heavy (not stat-heavy) story with narration that adapts to your MC's personality

Achievements for doing silly (and cool) things

Upcoming features:

Option to bypass mentions of societal bigotry

Additional codex and story journal entries

More detailed character profiles

[crystallizedtwilight]

I really like how you draw what you love in the moment. I am making a shift in my drawing interests as well, but I'm starting to feel guilty. My friends and followers know me as the (insert fandom) artist. Deep down I know what I am feeling is silly. Draw what you love! Who cares! I know that is the truth. So my question to you is, what do you do when those thoughts come to your head (if it does)?

What a thoughtful question! Below the cut:

Thank you! I've been on tumblr for 10 years and I have come to accept that I will always receive certain messages when I begin drawing a new interest:

"Guess you don't draw X anymore" / "Why did you stop drawing X?" / "Are you ever going to draw X again?" / "I want more X" / "When can we expect more X?" / "We're never going to see X again, are we?"

Though I've emphasized many times that this is my blog for all of my art and all my fandoms, every time I switch interests I am swamped with messages like this 3-4 months afterwards. It's an inevitability, because new folks may have missed that this is a "my current interest" blog, and old folks may not like the new content you're interested in.

At first it really bothered me, because I'd draw like 150 pieces of art for a fandom for 6 months straight, need a break, and the next day people will be like "guess you don't care anymore" like all the art I did wasn't enough.

The reality is: I like the idea of managing one blog for all of my artwork. I like how low-stress it is to have one, singular place I can still use a playground for my interests. I think it's a concept some people have forgotten is an option. Dare we call it a portfolio.

I am aware that the more "modern" way to conduct things, if you want to build an audience, is to have several blogs, each dedicated to one of your interests. But the very thought of managing 100 blogs every time I got a new interest makes my skin crawl and I know it would instantly suck the fun out of it for me.

I don't want to do that. I don't want to "build an audience", I just want to have a fun space for me. There are already so many social media sites out there besides tumblr, and if you're an artist that uploads to more than one, multiplying those by each of your fandoms? Sounds like more work than I want to do.

I can't remember the name of the artist, but I recall a few years ago one of the artists for the show Korra was bombarded with these sorts of messages when they started posting art that wasn't Avatar-related. And they said something to the effect of "I gave 2 years of my life to this show. Let me explore something new." And I'll never forget that. I feel the same way.

The theme of this blog is "my art". That's it. My interests change, sometimes circle back, and change again. And that's ok—that's how artists keep art fun for themselves. Every artist deserves a playground where they can share and connect with other people who are also just as excited about their newest thing. That's the joy of it.

Keeping yourself in a box just because that's what people want or expect you to do is the death of creativity. I am at peace with people unfollowing if our interests don't align anymore. This was never a blog for catering to anyone but myself, and that is ok.

So those messages don't bother me anymore. I know they're coming. I know they will always be there. And, every time, I will find new folks who do want to share in my new interest. I think in many ways I like starting over again. It feels refreshing.

But more than that, I know the importance of keep a space for myself online where I can be as creative and fun and silly as I like, chasing after the latest thing that is making me smile.

[idiopath-fic-smile]

hi!! i just wanted to say that world ain't ready, as silly as it may sound, is always going to have a special place in my heart because oh my GOD it's written so well, first of all, and also the way the queer topics are explored and handled is genuinely so beautiful. Enjolras being on the aroace spectrum/demisexual is so so important to me, and the way you write about these characters knowing exactly how dangerous it is to be openly queer, and doing it anyway, is incredibly powerful. Often when people make being queer a part of who they are, they're criticized for being so open/"annoying" about it, but it's truly so so important to be proud of that part of yourself because of how many people simply don't have that option. Also Grantaire being a burnt out gifted kid is so relatable and the way you wrote him let me see myself in him so beautifully. Sorry for the tangeant lol but I just wanted to let you know that this fic is so important to me :)

hi! thank you so much. i've always felt like, to the extent that it's true that queer people (maybe particularly bi and ace people) talk a lot about our identities, so much of that is because it's something we didn't grow up seeing discussed and we're trying to fill that void for the next generation and/or ourselves. and also, yeah, being proud of it rocks.

i love it whenever people see themselves in a grantaire i've written, but given his whole deal in this story, i do also feel the need to say: please extend the same grace and forgiveness to yourself that you extend to him. (apologies if that sounds condescending, it's just very much advice that he needs, so if you feel similar, maybe that will in some way be useful! it is advice i still struggle to take sometimes lol) thank you for this lovely note and take care!

[sirfrogsworth]

This isn't quite as silly as wanting to ban trans women from chess, but it's close.

I say this with no intention of body shaming what-so-ever, but this picture clearly shows peak physical fitness is not an aspect of dart skills. And if they want to maintain the narrative this is all about a physical biological advantage, well... *gestures again at picture*

The reason sports like darts and billiards have gender categories comes down to social conditioning and misogyny.

There was an episode of Mythbusters that explored the concept of "throwing like a girl" and they found it had nothing to do with girls being unable to throw a ball, but rather they were not conditioned to do so from a young age. And when they found young boys who had never thrown a ball, they ended up "throwing like a girl."

And if girls are not introduced to things at a young age, they are less likely to excel at them later in life—as most elite level athletes start very young. So there ends up being a smaller pool of participants which makes it harder to develop elite competitors. Less funding, less training options, harder to find competitions, etc. And so there are only a few women who are able to compete with the much larger pool of elite-level men in these less physical sports.

And then there is the misogyny. Women and girls feel unwelcome in many of these typically male spaces. They get bullied and insulted and quickly lose interest.

I am reminded of this COD player who simply said "bless you" to someone sneezing and then was inundated with pure hatred from her male competitors. If you are sensitive to horrible men saying horrible things, skip this video.

Trigger warning for graphic hate...

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It's not that men are inherently better at chess or darts or gaming, they just have a huge majority which makes it statistically more likely that mostly men are the best of the best.

To conclude, the only reason to exclude trans women from darts or chess or gaming is... transphobia.

Plain and simple.

I also believe they shouldn't be excluded from any other sport, but that is a more complicated conversation I have previously addressed. This is much more of a "no brainer" than that discussion.

[kaylatoonz]

This is technically not my idea, I’m not sure if it was Tumblr or Twitter but it’s basically an AU/post where Amy and Sonic are technically engaged through tribe traditions (in my AU case accidentally).

If you wanna find the original post, this is what I remember from it:

Amy beat Sonic in traditional combat so she claims him as her reward holding Sonic like a sack of potatoes.

Sonic whines to Knuckles about his current predicament only for Knuckles to tell him that he should have taken his training more seriously and he only has himself to blame. (If you can find the original I would love to see it again. It was so silly and cute).

Context:

In my AU Sonic, Tails, Knuckles adventures off-world to see if there are any remaining hedgehog tribes (Knuckles planned the trip once he found out his brother had never met another hedgehog before). After some time they come across a hedgehog tribe where a particular hedgehog catches Sonic’s eye, Amy Rose. They both hit it off well so much so that Sonic invites her back on earth to hang out (and maybe join his tribe/team). Amy sadly explains how she can’t leave her tribe until she comes of age or her guardian or chief is defeated in combat. Before Amy could probably explain other options Sonic excitedly proclaims that he could take on her guardian so she can be free to explore his world and maybe others. Amy again alongside Knuckles tries to explain to him about their traditions, but Sonic is too excited at the idea of his new friend coming to earth to fully listen. Ultimately, they both give up and decide to let Sonic weep the consequences whether he wins or loses against Amy’s Guardian.

Fortunately (or unfortunately) for Sonic despite not being as well trained as Knuckles he managed to beat Amy’s guardian in combat. Sonic is celebrating his victory until a congratulation for his engagement stops him in his tracks. Sonic's shocked expression, sends knuckles into a fit of laughter with tails followed soon after with his fits of giggles. Amy seems to also find their predicament entertaining and decides to have as much fun as she can with this by teasing Sonic.

Bonus context

After Sonic recovers from his shock, Amy lets him know that they can break off her engagement after a couple of months (it’s considered disrespectful if they break off the engagement too soon).

The engagement lasts until they’re of age for marriage (18-20s).

She also reveals that if he had listened, she would’ve told him the third option was for her to challenge her chief for the right to travel off world.

During her time on earth, Amy frequently teases Sonic about their engagement, giving him many pet names, such as My Darling or My Love.

Although Amy finds Sonic to be handsome and a great guy, she feels neither of them are ready to be married, though she changes her mind when she gets to know him more during her time on earth. She almost doesn’t want the engagement to end but She respects that this is something Sonic might not want or be ready for. Unbeknownst to her, Sonic secretly doesn’t want to end it either.

[ontoilogical]

on dame aylin (as the elusive other)

I haven't looked into a lot of what people are writing and meta commenting about Dame Aylin and Isobel Thorm, but in my personal quest to make the space in my head more entertaining, Isobel and Shadowheart have developed a tentative baseline voice I can recognize and imagine in situations. Dame Aylin, however, has not. Not yet. I want to slosh an idea or two around as to why that may be the case.

In the game, Dame Aylin is presented from many angles, depending on the character and their relationship with her, but a lot of the time her role is very othering. The othering doesn't come from the game writers' options of her – they wrote a wonderful, rich and layered character, gave her a three-arc questline that unfurls for the player like the most enticingly wrapped present, full of curiosities and surprises, and placed her so that you cannot avoid this gift even if you wanted to. And that's all without mentioning how her relationship with Isobel is the romance of the game, exceptional by any Faerûnian standards.

The othering, instead, comes from inside the story. The writers wrote a story where the main conflict for Dame Aylin is how much she is othered within the world she inhabits.

For Lorroakan and the adventurers that took on the bounty, she is a literal item, relic with a property, resource to harness for the problem they're trying to solve. For Ketheric, she is the unknown, the people that are unlike you, not a part of your group or tribe, infiltrating your territory, threatening your way of life and abducting your daughters. For the Sharrans, she was an obstacle, a test to pass or fail, a rite of passage. And although more implied than really explored, or just mentioned on the tail end of her story participation, to the mortals of the land she is a function – a vengeance paladin, a goddesses aspect, the will of Selûne, applied. Her status of exceptionality is even commented on by Isobel towards the end, when she says "She's singular among us all". Unlike anyone else.

I find my fun in discerning the many layers of a character's personhood, observing each one, naming them and seeing how they inform the character's actions, feelings, lowest and highest points, essence, that which we recognize as familiar, real, sympathetic. Dame Aylin is very rewarding in that regard, at the very least, to me.

...but even I may have fallen into the trap of latently believing Dame Aylin what she says about Dame Aylin. Because, as others before me have remarked, Dame Aylin also relegates Dame Aylin to a certain, narrow function. Her parting words for the player character essentially promise she will be another sword on the battlefield for their cause. And my rogue Dragonborn Tav is there like, staring in disbelief and deciding between the "can you fucking drop the formalities and tell me something silly about yourself, like whether you're, idk, physically capable of farting or burping or something", "do you think you can take Shadowheart with you I feel she likes you better", "do you ship CaitVi / are you excited for season 2 of Arcane" and "I want you to stay I'm not yet done with tanning my body under the Moonmaiden's glow" dialogue options.

To be clear, I do not believe her, but some strange, subconscious part of me may not allow me to disrespect Dame Aylin – when I open that sad notepad on my mobile phone – by being "she does this, but actually, it's a distraction from what's really going on deep inside her Aasimar soul", something that only Isobel gets to see, touch and feel. Isobel always understands, despite Aylin's deflections, even towards her (maybe, I haven't decided whether she does this or not). Isobel is patient and understanding about it, because that is her nature, but she'd be lying if she said it wasn't a little frustrating and trying at times. "Let me carry and care for you at least occasionally, my beloved. I witness your pain and it aches my heart when you try to shield me from it."

Hm.

I would also add that Aylin's charismatic presentation, language particularities and everything else make it potentially easy to set them as character points to check off, after which one may fall into a false sense of "there, I just wrote canon-accurate Dame Aylin". I mean, maybe you did, maybe I would, but... what about that Dame Aylin POV character exploration fic that doesn't feel like you're slapping "stoic character" tropes on her or keeping to the surface, but rather exploring what is distinctly and uniquely hers, beyond how strange she is against everyone else around her. I'm not saying anyone is doing this, but that this is how I feel whenever I try to write or imagine something that isn't a remix of the scenes and dialogues available in the game.

[ofthemorningstars]

Flurries and Flirtations (Part 1)

TerzOmega ~ Smut below the cut

3.1k words

Part 2

Ao3 Version

Terzo and Omega are snowed in at their hotel during an unplugged tour. What will they get up to?

---

Omega awoke with a start, disoriented, feeling blindly around the sheets. Something was wrong: Terzo wasn’t beside him like he usually was.

“Terzo?” Omega called out, voice hoarse. He sat up, pushing down the panic in his sleep drunk haze. With Terzo being as heavy a sleeper as he was, he typically never got up in the middle of the night. Surveying his surroundings with still-adjusting eyes, he finally spotted Terzo standing in the window, curtains drawn open. Omega sighed in relief, body relaxing. 

He allowed himself a moment to feel silly for reacting so strongly, but he had what he considered to be well-justified separation anxiety when it came to Terzo. Their relationship was secret, forbidden, and every moment spent together was a risk. With tensions in the ministry being so high as of late, his protective instincts were in overdrive.

Silently he got out of bed and headed for the window, muscled arms snaking around the smaller man’s middle, unapologetically clingy. Omega’s head came to rest on Terzo’s shoulder.

“You scared me for a minute there,” Omega rumbled in Terzo’s ear, placing a kiss to his jaw. “What has you up so early, tesoro mio?”

“Look outside,” Terzo said with quiet excitement.

Omega glanced up, doing a double take. The flurries that had just begun to accumulate when they arrived at the hotel that evening had piled up, quickly covering the ground in at least a foot or more of snow.

“Wow. That was quick. Do you think we’ll be stuck here an extra day?” Omega asked, voice hopeful.

“Maybe. I cannot imagine they’ll have all of this cleared by checkout, and you know how the Imperator hates to waste money. I doubt she’d pay for another stay and not have us take it,” Terzo scoffed. 

“Mmm. You’re right.” Omega kissed Terzo’s neck, inhaling his scent deeply, trying to be discrete. Terzo caught on anyway, batting him away playfully with a laugh.

“Stop sniffing me, you beast!” Terzo scolded him, almost giggling. “I am not some steak for you to drool over.”

“It’s not my fault you always smell so delicious,”  Omega chuckled, giving Terzo’s neck a long lick for emphasis. Terzo shivered, gripping onto Omega’s arms, which were still wrapped tightly around him. Terzo’s head fell back on Omega’s shoulder with a sigh, and Omega’s mouth took the opportunity to explore his throat. Fangs scraped against his pulse, and Terzo hummed.

“Go outside with me,” Terzo said after some time. Omega froze.

“Terzo. My love. My light. You know that’s a bad idea.” Omega replied quietly, his heart sinking. He wanted nothing more right now than to frolic in the snow with his little human mate, but there was too high of a chance of them getting caught. He glanced over at the clock by the bed. Three fourteen in the morning. 

“I knew you would say that,” Terzo groaned, turning in Omega’s hold. “Please, amore. We’ve never been in the snow together. You didn’t want to go to the beach with me either, and that turned out great!”

Omega gave him a reproachful look. “That was different, that beach was secluded. Where are we going to go, the parking lot?”

“There is an outdoor seating area in the trees, just around the back of the building. I saw it when we brought the bags in.” Terzo’s eyes were pleading and full of hope. Omega took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose and weighing his options. As much as he didn’t want to let Terzo down, and as certain as he was that they’d never get an opportunity like this again, he was still in guard dog mode. There had been too many close calls as of late. There was too much at stake. 

But with the way Terzo was looking at him now, it was so hard to tell him no. Omega agonized over it for a long minute.

“We’ve got to make it quick, and quiet,” Omega finally caved. He was rewarded with a beaming smile from Terzo that made it almost worth it by itself. “I can’t believe you’re so excited about a few inches of snow,” Omega allowed himself to joke.

“Those are not the only inches I’m excited about,” Terzo teased with a wink, palming Omega through his underwear and stealing a kiss.

They dressed as warmly as they could with what little streetwear they carried with them on their unplugged tour, Omega helping Terzo layer his socks to protect his feet, fussing over him and making sure Terzo was bundled up before he would let him go outside in the frigid temps. When he was satisfied that his fragile human would be adequately protected, he donned his uniform mask just in case, needing its glamour magic in order to look… less ghoulish. More like an ordinary human being.

They crept out through the back door, making sure to bring their key card and making a beeline for the picnic area. Omega trudged ahead, head down against the wind, taking long strides, not stopping until he was sure they would be shielded from view by the trees. He turned around to face Terzo, swearing when he realized he had unintentionally left him behind as the shorter man struggled to wade through the snow. Omega hurried back to him, pressing the cold metal of his mask to the top of Terzo’s head like a kiss as he ushered him to the safety of their hiding spot. 

As safe as they could be under the canopy, Terzo shoved his arms under Omega’s jacket, pressing his face against Omega’s chest. He was noticeably shivering. Omega chuckled, rubbing his back.

“What’s the matter, mio piccolo amore? I thought you wanted to be in the snow,” Omega cooed.

“I forgot h-how cold it was,” Terzo gritted out, teeth chattering. Omega’s body temperature perpetually ran higher than the average human’s did, so he cupped Terzo’s face in his hands in an attempt to warm him. He ran his thumbs gently down the sides of Terzo’s nose, now an angry shade of red. Terzo closed his eyes, leaning into his touch. Seeing his own hands like this, in his human form, was always jarring for Omega. The one thing that grounded him was his wedding band, perched exactly where it should be. He spotted the matching ring on Terzo’s hand as it closed around his. Terzo threaded their fingers together, moving to pull him deeper into the wooded area.

Acclimating more to the temperature, Terzo led him around the clearing, looking with wide-eyed wonder at the scene before them. The moon overhead reflected off the glittering snow, bathing them in a soft blue light. They walked a full circle around the perimeter, taking their time.

“It’s beautiful,” Terzo broke the silence of the world around them with hushed awe.

“So are you,” Omega’s voice whispered low in his ear. Terzo shivered, this time not from the cold.

Terzo broke away from him suddenly, spinning around to face him. A look of mischief crossed his features before he stooped down to pick up a fistful of snow with his bare hand. Much to Omega’s horror, he reached up and took a bite out of it, crunching on the compacted powder.

“Terzo!” Omega scolded, shocked.

“What? It is just water. I’m thirsty.” He took another bite unapologetically, shrugging his shoulders.

“It’ll make you even colder, put it down!” Omega swatted the remaining snow from his hand, now bright red. Terzo chuckled, stuffing his icy fingers down the back of Omega’s shirt, making contact with the warm skin underneath. Omega hissed and jerked away, not expecting the cold this time. Terzo laughed, eyes full of mischief, and tried running away, but Omega quickly caught up to him, accidentally tackling him. Terzo fell to the ground with a solid “Oof”, and Omega quickly scrambled to get off of him. Terzo lay in the snow trying to catch his breath, face flushed.

“Tesoro, are you alright?” Omega asked, concern evident in his voice. He felt absolutely wracked with guilt.

“I’m fine, amore. Just a little winded.” Terzo reached out for his hand. Omega quickly took it, wanting to help him up, but in a surprising show of strength, Terzo pulled Omega down into the snow with him, managing to catch him off guard. Terzo laughed, a wide grin splitting his face. Omega glared up at him from the snow, irate, but quickly melted at the sight of Terzo’s smile. The look of pure joy that was plastered on his face was rare as of late. Paired with the wintery backdrop, Omega was being treated to a truly beautiful sight, and he intended to cherish it.

Omega flopped back into the snow, allowing himself to rest for a moment. Terzo leaned over to plant a kiss to his mask before thinking better of it.

“Hm. Lips and cold metal aren’t the best mix, are they?” Terzo asked sincerely. Omega shook his head, amused.

Omega sat up, climbing to his feet and again extending a hand to Terzo, who promised no dirty tricks this time, instead gracing his hand with a kiss. Omega hauled Terzo up, trying to brush as much snow off of the both of them as possible. It stuck to them in wet clumps, already melting in places and soaking through their clothing. He could see Terzo fighting back shivers.

“I’m sorry, mio amato, I know you wanted to stay out longer, but we can’t have you getting sick. Let's get you back inside before you freeze.” Omega fussed over him.

Terzo looked put out, but nodded. They walked back to the hotel hand in hand, Omega’s still toasty despite the weather. 

By the time they were safely back in their room, Terzo truly was shivering. Omega stripped him rather unceremoniously, wanting to get him out of his wet clothes as soon as possible. Once Terzo was naked, Omega finally removed his mask, breaking its glamour magic. Elegant horns emerged from his head, skin shifting back to a dusky grey. His fingers ended in claws, ears pointed, eyes turning an inky black accented with violet irises. Much better, he thought. He caught Terzo watching the process, eyes hungry despite his physical discomfort. 

Once Omega stripped himself, he guided Terzo over to the bed, climbing under the covers with him. He was more than happy to share his body heat, accepting the sting of his husband’s skin on his own with grace. He rubbed his hand soothingly up and down Terzo’s back, peppering his face and neck with little kisses.

“Thank you for bringing me out there with you,” Omega spoke softly, trying not to break the bubble of peace surrounding them. “I truly do love doing new things with you. I cherish every moment that we get together. I want you to know that,” Omega told him then, emphasizing his words with a press of his lips to Terzo’s forehead. Terzo closed his eyes, reaching up to run a hand through Omega’s hair, which hung down from its usual bun, framing his face.

“Grazie for going with me, amore. I have only seen the snow a handful of times in my life.” He kissed Omega’s cheek. “I wish we had a fireplace to cuddle in front of” Terzo bemoaned suddenly, still shivering, trying to get as close to Omega as possible. Omega chuckled, drawing him tightly to his body.

As they warmed together, Omega’s touch on Terzo’s back slowed, softened. Lowered. Became more sensual. His fingers brushed just above the curve of his ass, never quite touching. Omega tucked his face into the crook of Terzo’s neck, drinking in his scent. Terzo rubbed his legs together subtly, thinking that Omega wouldn’t notice.

“Go ahead,” Omega urged sweetly, voice barely above a whisper. “Touch yourself. I know you’re dying for some relief.” Omega’s hand teased Terzo’s stomach, grazing his hip bone but purposefully avoiding where Terzo wanted him. Terzo whined, but obeyed, letting his own hand drift down. He stroked himself, lightly at first, teasing. He hid his face in Omega’s shoulder, uncharacteristically shy. At first Omega watched his movements under the covers, but eventually he pulled them back, just enough to get a better view. He was beautiful, and precum was already beading at his tip. Omega salivated, itching to take over but enjoying the show too much to stop. 

Instead, Omega reached out to him with his quintessence, wanting to feel what Terzo was feeling, to connect on a deeper level. Terzo eagerly accepted, letting him in with a sigh of relief, a feeling reminiscent of coming home after a long day. All at once, Omega was overcome with the sensation of delicious friction against sensitive flesh. It was his turn to shiver. He felt himself twitch, the gentle throbbing of earlier turning into a fierce ache. His hand wandered to his own cock and Terzo gasped at the sensation, feeling everything Omega was experiencing as well. Omega teased himself, not yet setting a rhythm. 

“Mm, you’re doing so good, mio amato. Such a naughty boy, pleasing yourself for me,” Omega crowed, voice gravelly. Terzo groaned in response, squeezing himself. Omega moved down the bed just enough to reach Terzo’s chest with his mouth, sucking for the sake of leaving bruises. Omega’s mouth wandered over to a nipple, always one of Terzo’s sensitive spots; Terzo’s hips bucked and he sucked in a breath. Omega hummed, pleased by both Terzo’s reaction and the sensations sparking across their connection. Pleased enough to repeat it on the other side. 

He allowed his mouth to make its way up Terzo’s throat, his neck, before landing at his ear, which he gave a firm nip. Omega felt Terzo’s heartbeat quicken as hot breath hit the side of his face. His hand began to move down Terzo’s back.

“This is just the beginning, tesoro. Do you want to know what I’m going to do to you later?” He could hear the grin in his own voice, his smile all fangs. Terzo held his breath. Omega’s hand found its place on Tero’s ass, squeezing. He growled from deep in his chest. “I’m going to destroy you.” He felt heat race up Terzo’s spine like an electric jolt.

Before Terzo could get out the whimper Omega could feel coming, Omega’s mouth was upon his, attacking, tongue plundering. He bit down on Terzo’s bottom lip with his fangs before soothing away the pain as Terzo’s hand tangled in his chest hair. Omega started to stroke himself in earnest now, enjoying the way that Terzo’s breath stuttered when he felt Omega playing with his tip through their connection. 

They lay that way for a long while, lazily touching themselves for the enjoyment of the other and swallowing each other's moans. Omega felt it when Terzo’s head started to swim and tried to steady him, to act as his anchor, but he was losing his grip on reality too. To them, nothing existed outside of this moment. He wanted to stay lost in it forever, but as the pressure at the base of his spine began to build, he knew he was fighting a losing battle.

Omega could feel how badly Terzo wanted to replace his own hand with the ghoul’s. He strongly considered giving in, Satanas knows Omega was burning up to touch him, but he was enjoying the little game between them too much to concede. His mouth descended on Terzo’s neck, biting hard enough to send blood trickling in little rivulets down his collarbone. Terzo gasped, body tensing, fighting off climax with his last shred of restraint. As the sweet sting of pain shimmered brightly across their connection, Omega was intent on breaking him.

“Delicious,” Omega breathed, echoing his own earlier words. He pulled Terzo’s body closer until they were pressed chest to chest, one of Terzo’s legs on top of his. He let his claws dig into Terzo’s back, dragging and leaving long scratches that jeweled with drops of blood. Pain sang through them again.

To Omega’s surprise, Terzo grabbed him by the hair, pulling his head up and licking up into his mouth, wanting to taste his own blood on Omega’s lips. Omega felt as though he might combust, pumping himself faster. Terzo groaned into his mouth in response, tightening his own grip on himself. Omega reluctantly broke the kiss, needing to catch his breath. He opened his eyes to find Terzo’s mismatched gaze fixed on him, boring into him as though he could see into his soul.

“My ghoul,” Terzo whispered, pressing their foreheads together, their harsh breath twining. They were quickly unraveling, racing towards the finish line at the same rate. Omega wanted to draw it out, wanted to wait, but Terzo was chasing oblivion with abandon and dragging him along for the ride. When they came it was together, electricity bouncing back and forth between them in a feedback loop of pleasure. It took a long time for them to float back down, struggling to breathe in each other's arms.

Omega pet Terzo’s hair, a few strands stuck to his forehead with sweat. Terzo nuzzled against his chest, taking his own sniffs of Omega’s scent. Omega chuckled at his lover’s hypocrisy. Terzo ignored the amusement he felt over their connection, rubbing his face in Omega’s smattering of soft white chest hair, only stopping to give his sternum a little kiss. Omega’s fingertips lightly danced over the fresh welts on Terzo’s back.

They lay in bed together until the sun began to rise, dozing and talking in turn, all hushed voices and soft touches. When the looming threat of checkout could no longer be ignored, Terzo reluctantly pulled himself out of bed, all gloom, retrieving his phone and calling their tour manager about the snow; as a rule, he tried to avoid talking to the Imperator whenever possible, using their manager as a proxy instead. When he hung up, his demeanor was markedly more chipper.

“Good news?” Omega asked hopefully. Terzo nodded, his face alight with joy. Terzo took Omega perching on the edge of the bed as an invitation to sit on his lap, his arms wrapping around Omega’s neck, gracing his cheek with a kiss.

“We are not leaving until tomorrow morning, which means we get a private room for the whole day.” Terzo tilted Omega’s chin up, kissing his lips this time. Omega pulled back before they could get carried away. 

“Mm. In that case, I think I’m going to shower. Care to join me?” Terzo nodded, a twinkle in his eye. 

---

Art by @bathyal-zone

Comission him here or on Tumblr!

[bitingcatshark]

BestFriendSimon Riley x Femreader

< Distance >

Chapter 2

(Let's see where my mind leads us today. . .)

It sucks. More than you'd like to admit. The position you were in, made you feel like you were stuck. Waiting for responses, and eagerly typing out too much for Simon to read whenever he could. He was deployed so far away, that the only times you could talk with one another, was night and day difference. One would always miss the other. On top of that, Simon didn't even have the time to talk when he was busy being Ghost. Being a weapon. You always feared deep down that he'd lose feelings for you over this distance. That the spark you had accumulated would eventually falter and die. That he'd rather choose to be with someone on base than with you. It was easier that way, wasn't it? Who would want to put in that effort to be with you, when there were so many easier options out there for him. You felt like a chore talking to. You felt like he was obligated to respond. Did you even cross his mind when he fell asleep at night? Did he think of you, when he looked at the moon at night?

Simon grunted against the hard bed, staring up into the top bunker where Soap was rumbling from snoring so loudly. Checking his phone, he saw you'd had left many messages as per usual. He couldn't help but smile at the silly pictures you sent, listening to your voicenotes quietly, chuckling whenever you laughed in that certain way, filling him with a sense of warmth. He responded as best as he could, leaving you a few messages for you to see later during the day. Closing his eyes, readying himself for slumber, he thought of you. He thought of how it would be for you to finally run into his arms, how you'd laugh if he'd pick you up and spin you around. He imagined how you'd feel, your skin, your hair, your lips, every intricate detail of your body he wanted to explore and get to know more. Replaying memories of your calls, more intimate ones as well, he couldn't help but chuckle again, causing Soap to grunt, obviously thinking Simon had developed schizophrenia or something for laughing at nothing. But he couldn't contain the happiness he felt, the way he'd look forward to slumber, just so that he could hold you within his arms in the depths of his dreams. Fuzziness filled his stomach. What would it be like to know you, to truly know you?

You came back from running errands, finally able to check your phone and see the goodnight text from Simon. Rose spread across your cheeks as you smiled. But some somberness overcame you, causing you to quickly retract your smile, dismissing the text and deciding to respond later, despite wanting to do it that moment. Thinking it would be best to not ward him off by seeming too desperate. He had a life..did he even really think of you that way? Perhaps these feelings were something you'd get over. Did he really mean it when he mentioned he wanted to meet you? Or was it just something he said within the moment? Best not to get your hopes up too much, you thought. You knew how it always ended up.

Simon laid, dreaming of you, smile spread across his rough features. Oh, to be in love with this girl.

(Ignore the doodle, I haven't drawn for quite some time LOL.)

[kirkwallguy]

i rly think DA's companions peaked with rivalries lol, like that can create such interesting dynamics, when rivaled these people are still following hawke and you can still romance them, Interesting!! THat's cool! why are they doing that, staying with someone who's disagreed with them the whole time or done things they find objectionable - you get different dialogue in cutscenes too, they react to how you treat them (thinking with Merrill you can just chose to not give her the thing to fix the eluvian and you get a different scene after the quest) You can be mean, you can support them or not and they respond to that, it feels like your choices are affecting the characters around you. (diff game but alistair confronts you about Isolde and if you killed her, the kid, or got help, i'd have loved more of that!! more characters going "hey this was fucked up of you, why???" or "I'm glad you handled this" and then you can talk about it more, the companions having Thoughts on your good or bad behavior and actions and voicing it!) also I think not being able to just chat with the companions was a silly choice, especially with the fact that rook can be a crow or shadow dragon etc, wdym we cant just talk about that with the gang??? ask for their thoughts on it all and they ask for rooks, rook could voice support or question what the group is and what they're doing (kinda like with Wynne and mage warden, you can talk about the circles and voice your dislike or support for them), rook could ask for more information and if they know they could share, or they won't if rook isn't a part of that group and it's all meant to be secret or something - and maybe if you ask again when they have high approval they'll tell you anyway cause they trust you, more opportunities for lore and worldbuilding as well as exploring the characters a little more??

idk im :/ rambling lol, i just really enjoyed how much you could say and do in other games, dav feels limited? And like nothing was perfect in the other games but I feel like there were so many more opportunities to learn about everything and the characters felt so much more involved? I do love that the companions talk to each other at the lighthouse like thats great we get to see those dynamics more outside of party banter!

i LOVE the rivalry dynamic and it really helps with each playthrough feeling unique, a hawke who is besties with merril is so different emotionally to a hawke who rivals merril, and it feels like there's a near-endless number of combos? also being able to push back on companions is something people have been complaining about a LOT in dai and dav, being able to spend the entire game disagreeing with a character and still see their entire story (WITH extra dialogue and sometimes entirely different cutscenes to acknowledge the fact that you don't have a good relationship?) it solves such a fundamental problem with relationships in rpgs and i don't get why it isn't more frequently used lol

and yeah i can understand if they wanted to save money not doing chats in the lighthouse (tbh. the inquisition skyhold dialogue options were just annoying and useless to me especially when you had to exhaust them to trigger certain quests), but it just feels like it creates a distance between you and the companions when they can all have conversations with each other at the lighthouse but you can't speak to them? it just feels like such an important feature for the genre and the only other game in the series that doesn't have it is the one that was made in like a year

[zeondraws]

How to install the DmgModLoader(DML) + Trainer for Still Wakes The Deep

The files are from the Still Wakes The Deep Speedrunning server, thank you to one of the members for showing me how to install them. Owner of the mod is Dmgvol, please support him if you like his work:

You can find a lot more mods on his Nexusmods page, which is linked on his Ko-fi. Very simple installation progress, to make it easier to find I put the files in my Google Drive folder:

The "DmgModLoader_P.pak" needs its own folder inside the pak folder of Still Wakes The Deep, you can call it "dml"

To find the paks folder, here is an example path: D:\SteamLibrary\steamapps\common\Still Wakes the Deep\Habitat\Content\Paks Example where it is on my pc ^

Then you need to unzip dmg2 and put the content of this folder straigt into the paks folder of SWTD. blue is where the DmgModLoader pak file is inside red are the files from the dmg2 zip.

Afterwards you can boot the game, you should be able to see in the top left hand corner, that the mods are loaded.

I'll add a screenshot to showcase each function that the mod provides, for more detailed description you can check out the discord server mentioned above.

Key_ShowHelp= H

Key_Freecam= F2

you can use WASD to move around, Q and E to go down and up, F and R to zoom in and out.

Key_TimeDilation= F3 There are three Time Dilation options, first one is 2, then 4, afterwards 0.5 So don't be confused when you accidentally press that key.

Key_SavePos= F4 Save the current position you are standing on, afterwards you can press F5 to return to the location you saved. (I use this whenever I record Muir and want to capture a scene- hang on a minute I just realised something... I'll be back about this thought in a bit)

Key_Jumps= F6

Basically, you can jump mid air. Tho if you land on a height that is way lower than where you jumped from you'll die.

There are a few other options, tho I don't use them (since I am not a speedrunner). Like Marker Mode (G) and the Visualizers (1, 2, 3), just don't be confused when you accidentally press them.

Tho before you use these mods, play through the game normally first (if you haven't played it before). Mostly so that you can experience the proper gameplay first, before messing around with it. I started using the mod on my 4th playthrough I think.

You may break the game a bunch of times with some of these functions, you can usually restart from checkpoint when that happens.

But hope you guys find this helpful, I wanted to showcase how to use this mod so that more people can take their own references, or further explore areas you usually can't see. Since I am busy with my video project I can't check everything on my own. So with this, more people can explore and discover things on their own. But please, if you haven't played the game yet, play it normally first.

I know I like to skip Leg C because I don't feel like going through it for the 30th time, but I already played through this game many times.

But now you can take your own silly screenshots! Just like these:

Enjoy!

Edit: I realised I can teleport myself to Muir and Innes and watch him skelp Innes from close up

[raayllum]

happy pride month featuring. demisexual rayla and mayhaps some aro spec vibes too

Rayla has never really felt the stirrings, before, as other elves call it.

 Her training ramps up when she’s twelve, but the other kids her age are starting to be consumed by crushes, blushing and making fools of themselves unnecessarily. It’s hard to understand, and even more annoying to watch. Can’t they just focus on what needs to be done? They’re the future warriors, defenders and protectors, of their village. They don’t have time for silliness, never mind the time consuming foolishness that comes with often short lived romantic (or even sexual) entanglements she sees the older assassins in training partake in. 

She supposes she’s just much more mature than they are. It’s the only explanation. 

Then she meets Callum. 

It’s not that they suddenly start, exactly — but for the first time, it feels like there’s potential for them to. How else is she supposed to explain this want to always be close to him, unable to resist from placing her hands on his shoulders, getting all up in his face as she teases him with her human impression? This maddening need to see him smile, to lift his spirits on the rare occasion he’s the downtrodden one (a situation that becomes less and less rare once he learns the truth about his father)? The racing of her heart and incessant thoughts in her mind that she can’t lose him, her fingers hesitantly touching his cheek, because she’s felt so many things since she ran away with two human princes and a dragon egg, but this — this is something else. 

His hand in hers makes sparks buzz in her chest, their interlaced fingers before the blind Sol Regem wholly for their own benefit. Her heart feels like it’s about to burst out of her chest with fondness and affection when she catches him blushing, when she catches him staring at her the way she imagines she’s been staring at him for quite a while now.

Once the embarrassment of the Oasis has faded, Rayla curls into his arms that cool night on the back of the ambler, and lets herself chase that warmth, a blanket draped over their laps and his lips firm against hers.

They explore a little more at the Nexus and the castle—kissing in dark alcoves and pressed against walls, pulling him close by his scarf, exploring more confidently the further they go, as far as his shirt being off one unbearably hot summer night, anyway.

Then she leaves, and is achingly cold. 

It’s not as though there are no offers while she’s away. The pubs and inns she frequents as she crosses through Xadia, when she can afford to and when camping isn’t an option, are home to many travellers looking for a good time. When she breaks her leg falling from a stupid tree, the clerk at the apocathery is very sweet, and asks if she’d stay a little longer once she’s healed up. His eyes are so green it’s almost tempting, but Rayla knows what she knows, and especially knows her heart.

There’s no one else. There never will be.

The jitters grow worse the closer she gets to Katolis when she finally turns around, Stella doing her best to soothe her nerves to little avail. 

She misses his birthday by one night and spends most of the next day crying, pacing outside the city walls till it’s almost nightfall. What will he say? What will he do? How has he changed, and what if he hasn’t? What if he still...

She climbs through his window, catching sight of the back of him first—broader, taller, with shorter, spikier hair swooped to one side—and then he turns around, gasping.

Still her Callum.

Boom. Stirrings. 

She spends most of the night admiring him once he’s relaxed enough to fall asleep, basking in the fact she’s by his side again, that she can do this—that he didn’t leave.

She thinks of the time one of the other Moonshadow kids had made a face when she didn’t have a crush on anyone, calling her strange.

Runaan had taken her aside and explained that sometimes, falling in love works differently for people, if they fall in love at all. That it was the same for him with Ethari. “Sometimes you fall in love only once,” he’d said.

She watches the way the sun catches Callum’s hair, illuminating a face that’s only grown more handsome since she left. In spite of everything, or perhaps precisely because of everything, she smiles.

This is it.

[originemesis]

"creation took 7 days; now watch me fuck it all up in one night"

canon divergent adam / abel // haz.b.in h.o.tel

21 + / mid-low activity / private and 🐢 SLOW

ordained and entertained by skeu ; icon templates by cinna! 💜💛

Commission human icons by bbglucifer ;p <3 --- > xxx

side blog: vortex @gutstaken (changing over to Abel at some point.)

here are some cool people 😎 : @mourningstarred / deathinfeathers , @lilitophidian , @cast-you-dxwn , @2ndrib , @atomeyes , @arachn0philia , @drraphaelmd-a @brokendreamscreation , @hlylight , @chasingrainbcws @danger-tits-lute , @hclluvahctel , @themosthatedbeingg , @metaladam

about // playlist // active headcanon // current verses // rules [beneath]

Caard-Esque:

Blog is 21+ for content concerns and mun is 25+ (an old) and will not interact with minors on this blog. minors should technically not follow me here either ~ so, don'tttttt...do that? thanks! if i catch you, you're yeeted to the shadow realm.

Do not follow this blog if you are sensitive to the sensitive topics related to this particular genre. I tag with "content word cw" for the extra wild stuff, but that's about it. adam literally has the highest swear/slur count in the show and he's only in 3 episodes, so be aware of that.

I tend to be private/selective as i get fairly overwhelmed with too much activity. i really get into plots though, and i'll spam the dash with some silly original dick chauvinism from time to time when ive fed my inner gremlins past midnight. That said, I do get easily overwhelmed when I'm following too many people and multi muse blogs in particular can exacerbate this feeling, so if I do not follow back - I might just not be in a good place to atm or I just don't see possible interactions btw our characters. It's nothing personal! ^^

This is a mutuals only interaction blog for my sanity (anons being fine). if i can see plots happening between us, i'll likely follow. but i get overwhelmed easily so please don't take it personally if i don't follow back or follow back right away.

I am not exclusive, but I prioritize my plotted threads and may have some mains/activity based off that as far as my main verse goes. But I will never be fully exclusive and i enjoy exploring different character dynamics. Also multiship is fine, but I am not exclusively here to ship or write suggestive content. My muses have always and will always require plotting and scene chemistry for me to consider writing ship material. In the case I do reblog shippy prompts still feel free to send in ofc! I'll see if I can make it work or not.

If I don't get a follow back within a week or two, if blogs i follow go inactive for up to 6-7 weeks, or if there's just no attempt on either of our ends to connect for an indefinite amount of time - i'll occasionally go through my list and soft block to clean things up. if we ever want to give it a go in the future, the option is there for us to re-follow and resume! i have in the past been made to feel like I'm walking on egg shells in rpcs regarding these matters and id rather avoid it here...im just here to chill, write and leave weird surprises in dms.

I don't like the feeling of being 'collected' so...if you are interacting with multiple of my muses, I ask you have a different dynamic for mine than them. This is just an act of courtesy I also extend to my rp partners. I interact more with folks that have a special relationship with my muse, so it's needed to deep dive into more interesting topics for me. I also do not usually interact w/ other of the same muse cuz I feel like I 'absorb' how others play him and I want to keep my version separated from that. I might give it a shot some times though depending on how it's presented. And if you're just concerned with collecting another Adam for 'shipping' steer clear of me because I rarely ship unless given good reason to.

I know that Adam is a bad guy. He's insufferable and can push buttons- but I am not him and I dislike constantly feeling like I'm being barraged for his actions, especially since I consider him to be a heavily layered character that should not be shoe horned into a standard 'ok irredeemable and never allowed nice things' box. So- if you honestly hate this character please don't interact. I am here for exploring taboo topics and ways that a flawed character can make others think he's justified, betray them, make people feel COMPLICATED things... I also love torturing my muse and taking the piss out of him, so I don't need people moving in and tying to constantly put him down/ruin his current plots by being god modey or not at least asking me how we should proceed in a power dynamic, or relationships cuz you don't ship what I ship, or find my interactions with other characters 'toxic' and 'not allowed'...let me explore and enjoy what I like on my blog within reason and do talk with me on dms if you don't like how things are going with our muses and you wanna explore other routes. I love to plot and I am very reasonable.

This is my blog and my verses and my interpretation of what's going on. I am happy to accommodate to any pre determined and agreed upon thread, but I will not let other characters that are considered 'more powerful' lore wise that aren't even canon dictate what I can do on my blog or in my personally plotted verses. I am happy to adjust depending on others' verses, but I require direct and forward communication before each interaction if that's the case. On my blog, Adam (mainly) is the head of the exorcists and always has been and will be until his death. He commands, sleeps with and is generally the head boss of the Exorcists. Do not force any headcanons onto my character such as being a woman beater or groomer or etc bc that is not what he is to me or how I portray him in my verses.

This post/my rules and conditions are subject to change based on what I get up to on here.