#but she’s getting dunked on for wanting her dad’s attention

[trashogram]

If I were Octavia, and I learned that the parents I thought were in love and wanted me actually hated each other this whole time and only had me because it was an obligation, I’d be devastated and traumatized.

[the-froschamethyst4]

It’s always Uncle Gaz

𖤐Pairing: Dad! Price x Mom! Reader

𖤐Pronouns: She/Her

𖤐Warnings: fluff, favoritism, language, jealousy

𖤐Summary: Price gets a little jealous when his kids favor Uncle Gaz over him about anything

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9:30AM

Y/n was woken up by her two kids Beau and Iris making a ruckus downstairs. She rubbed her tired eyes and saw John wasn’t in bed.

Maybe he’s handling it?

She removed the covers off her body she lazily got up out of bed still tired, as she walked she bumped into the doorframe with her shoulder earning a soft groan.

She yawned and saw her kids and husband at the kitchen.

“Daddy, Uncle Gaz makes better pancakes than you,” Iris said as she held up a burnt pancake.

“Honey, that was a test one,” he chuckled.

“No it wasn’t, you said you’ll give it to Beau!” Iris yells.

“HEY!!” Beau yells.

Y/n chuckled at her family getting her families attention.

“Mummy!” Iris yelled and ran to her mom hugging her legs but Y/n picked her up and kissed her temple.

“What are you making, daddy?” She teased in a mocking tone of voice and walked to her husband.

“Pancakes, fruit, toast and orange juice,” he says before kissing his wife ‘good morning’.

“Uncle Gaz makes homemade orange juice,” Iris said, Y/n set her on the ground and she wondered off.

“I should just…never invite Gaz over anymore.”

“Huh why?” Y/n asked as she fixed herself a cup of coffee.

“Because…” he looked to his children and grabbed his wife’s wrist.

He pulled her into the hallway that led to the kids bedroom. He rubbed his temple and looked down at her, she had a confused look on her face.

“John?”

“I’m tired of it.”

“Of what? John, you’re scaring me a little.”

“Gaz…every little thing, it’s always ‘Uncle Gaz this, Uncle Gaz that’,” he mocks his kids tones of voice.

“Price. They just love him like they love you, they just get excited when Gaz comes over. He always brings them gifts and cooks for them, so of course they’ll talk about him a lot. That doesn’t mean they love him more than you.”

“Feel like it does…they never say ‘daddy this, daddy that,’ it’s always ‘Uncle Gaz’.”

“Uncle Gaz, is just someone they also look up to…Iris just loves his cooking, Beau loves his gifts, they do love you, Price, I promise they do,” she stood on her tippy toes and kissed his lips.

After some time. Beau, Iris and Y/n all got ready to go to Simon’s house. Simon wanted to build a garden but didn’t know where to start, so he asked if Y/n could help him. She agreed and also agreed to bring the kids because they love helping in the garden.

“Kids, come on let’s go to Uncle Simon’s house.”

“Uncle Simon?” Beau said peaking over the couch.

“Yes, I have to help him with his garden, Beau do you want to come?”

“Yeah.”

“Mummy, I don’t want to go,” Iris said crossing her arms.

“Okay, come on Beau,” Y/n said. Beau chased after Y/n as Iris plopped on the couch taking the remote and turning the channel to her favorite cartoon.

“Iris…do you wanna go swimming?” Price asked.

“Can Uncle Gaz come?”

“No,” Price says, quickly but calmed himself down. “No, not today, baby, just us…okay?”

“Okay,” she got off the couch and ran off to go change into her swimsuit, the same with Price.

He grabbed black swimming trunks and grabbed sunscreen from the bathroom closet.

“Daddy, is my hat on right?” Iris came into the bathroom with a purple bucket hat, a Princess Aurora bathing suit on.

“Yep,” he fixed it just a tad before grabbing flip flops and they headed downstairs to the backyard.

Iris waited for Price to remove the pool cover. She bent down resting her hands on her knees as she watched a bee go from flower to flower.

“Iris,” he called. She stood up and ran to him, he picked her up. "Don't run near the pool, you'll get hurt, always walk."

"Yes, daddy," she smiles. She was placed on a beach chair and Price sprayed some sunscreen on her skin, he pours SPF 50 on his hands rubbing it in and rubbing it in her face.

"There, now arm floaties," he dunks the arm floaties in the water so they could slide on her arms a lot easier, and he pulls them all the way up almost under her armpits.

"Okay, come on," he claps his hands and picked up Iris. He slowly got in the pool, he felt Iris's arms wrap around his neck.

"It's so cold," her teeth chatters.

"I know, I know, but you'll get used to it," he said as he slowly sunk down in the pool and Iris pushed herself off his chest, she started to move around and played with some of her pool toys.

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"Uncle Simon, what are those?" Beau asked, pointing to a basket full of packet of seeds.

"Umm I bought, corn, sunflowers, tomatoes, bell peppers, banana peppers, eggplant, cucumbers, zucchini and..." He grabs the last packet. "Pumpkin."

"Why, pumpkin?" Y/n asked as she wiped her forehead with the back of her hand.

"To make pumpkin pie, my aunt made a mad homemade pumpkin pie and I still have the recipe for it," Y/n just chuckled and shook her head.

"What? It's good," he said.

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Price leaned on the edge of the pool, his head back and arms on the sides of the pool. He opened his eyes and looked down at Iris, she was sitting on the side of the pool with her toys in her hands.

A Barbie doll, Ken doll and some small animal figures. She would use her regular voice for Barbie and try to drop her voice when she played with Ken.

Price smiled at his daughter and swam close to her. He Sat on the edge with her, and she immediately gave Ken to him.

"My throat hurts when I play with him," she coughed.

"Iris," she looked up at him with her big doe eyes.

"Yes, daddy?"

"Do you love me?"

"Yeah~? Why?"

"Well...you bring up Uncle Gaz a lot..."

"Because I love his cooking, his gifts and when he comes over and he'd play with Beau and me...sometimes you and mama can be busy and when he babysits us, we always have fun and I love Uncle Gaz."

"I see..." he said as Iris played with her Barbie's hair.

Price kissed her forehead and played with Iris.

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A few hours have passed, Price went into the house and grabbed some snacks for her and him, Iris sat on her beach chair, she was wrapped in a towel picking at her nailbeds.

She grabbed her water bottle and took some sips from the bottle. Price came out with two plates, he sat in the chair next to her, he helped her get her arm floaties off and watched her go after the watermelon he had set on the plate.

He watched when she took a bit some seeds landed on the sides of her cheeks. He chuckles and rubs his thumb over her cheeks and removes the seeds on her cheeks.

"WE'RE HOME!!" Y/n yelled from the house.

Iris looks at the house and saw her mom and older brother come back home from Uncle Simon's house.

"Mummy!" She yells and runs to her. Y/n picked her up and kissed her cheeks.

"Mmm~ How's my baby girl?" She asked, before kissing her temple.

"Good, daddy made us lunch," she pointed to her plate.

Price smiled at his wife and daughter, Y/n placed Iris back on the ground, she ran back to her food and Price stood up and walked to Y/n.

"So, how are we feeling about Uncle Gaz now?"

"I found out when we are busy, and Gaz comes over...he just spends so much time with them...and that's why she 'loves' him."

"Mmmm~" she hums and kissed his lips. "I'll get changed and come out and hang out with you guys."

"CANON BALL!!" Beau came running out of the house and jumping into the pool, he barely missed Iris when he jumped in.

"Guess, I'll be back," she said, smiling and going back into the house.

---------

Y/n held Iris in her arms as Price and Beau were having a Splash Competition. Iris giggled when she watched her dad and brother jump into the pool.

"Daddy had a big splash," Iris smiles.

"Nuh-uh, I did," Beau argued.

"Nope, daddy did," Iris said.

"MUM!" Both kids yelled.

"Beau," Y/n said with a giggle.

"YES!"

"Fine," Iris whined.

"You lied, didn't you?" Price asked as he moved closer to Y/n.

"I did...yours was big but I only lied to make Beau happy," she smiles.

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8:20PM

The kids got out of the bath and Iris was getting pajamas on ready for bed. She walked down the hall to her parents' bedroom; she pushed open the door and saw her mom put on an oversized t-shirt.

"Mummy, I'm ready..." she yawned.

"Alright, come on," she moved her daughter out of the bedroom, Price was getting out of the shower.

Iris fell on her bed and got under her covers. Beau came into his little sister's bedroom waiting for his turn to be tucked in.

She kissed Iris's forehead and turned off her bedroom light leaving on the little nightlight in the wall. She now moves Beau to his bedroom.

"Alright, Beau," she said as he got in his bed. "Good night."

"Night, mum," he said as she walked out of his bedroom, and she headed back to her shared bedroom.

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Price came out of the bathroom and saw Y/n on her stomach reading a book. Price smiled and crawled on top of her and kissed her neck and her between her shoulder blades.

"Price," she coos. His hands ran up the shirt she was wearing which was actually his shirts. His hands stayed on her waist.

"I love you."

"I love you too," she chuckled a little confused, he fell next to her and moved a piece of her hair from her face.

"Are you finally over why, Iris loves Gaz?"

"Oh yeah, I'm over it. I now know I am the favorite," he smiles all cocky.

"Yeah okay," she giggles and playfully pushed him away.

[toasttt11]

calder trophy

July 25, 2023

Octavia sat on the edge of the bed texting Simon waiting for brothers to finish getting ready because they take forever.

She smiled at the text before clicking off her phone when she heard her brothers all walk back into the room, she looked up seeing the three all in their suits but she shook her head at Jack’s hair because what did he do to it.

Octavia was wearing black trousers and a black off the shoulder long sleeve with black and white low Nike dunks, she did a light makeup and straighten her hair.

“Finally!” Octavia groaned standing up off the bed slipping her phone into her trousers.

“It’s takes time to look good moons.” Jack smirked ruining a hand through his hair.

“They why did it take you so long?” Octavia innocently questioned tilting her head before walking to the door and walking out of the hotel room with the three following.

“Hey!” Jack complained as he followed Quinn and Luke who were snickering.

Octavia just smiled slighty before continuing the walk to the hotel lobby where there parents were. They all walked down broadway to the arena and onto the red carpet.

“Taves!” Auston Matthew grinned calling out her name walking over to her, he pulled her into a gentle hug.

“Hi Aus.” Octavia grinned slightly hugging back before pulling away seeing her family looking at her with a curious looks, as Octavia doesn’t tend to like a lot of people.

“Auston this is my family, My mom Ellen, My dad Jim, Quinn, Jack and My twin Luke.” Octavia proudly smiled introducing her family to one of the teammates she is closest with.

“It’s nice to meet all of you!” Auston politely smiled at the Hughes having met Quinn and Jack a few times before.

Jack saw Nico and perked up dragging his parents with him to the Hischer’s, Quinn trailed behind them, Luke looked at Octavia and she just smiled nodding knowing Luke wanted to say hi to his captain.

Octavia and Austin started talking and posed for a photo together a media person asked for before Auston noticed her shoes and let out a chuckle.

“What?” Octavia scrunched her eyebrows looking confused.

“Mitchy is gonna be so mad.” Auston chuckled gesturing to his shoes and her shoes.

Octavia looked down seeing Austin wearing the same pair of Nike dunks as she is, and just shook her head knowing Mitch will be upset, and speaking of Mitch they heard his voice and looked over seeing Mitch and Steph walking to them.

“My Child!!!!” Mitch Marner grinned going right to Octavia pulling her into a tight hug, “We missed you!”

“Hi Mitchy. I saw you a few weeks ago.” Octavia deadpanned but accepted the hug from Mitch.

“A few weeks too long. Zeus misses you.” Mitch pulled back looked very serious.

“I miss him too.” Octavia replied with a very small grin, before turning to Steph, “Hi Steph.”

Steph grinned pulling Octavia into a hug, “Tavia!” She gently pulled back smiling at Octavia’s outfit, “You picked this one.” Steph smiled having gone shopping and picked out that outfit for Octavia.

“i like it.” Octavia simply nodded.

“I’m glad.” Steph fondly smiled at the girl who her and her husband have adopted as their own during the season.

Mitch gasped dramatically, “Guys! You didn’t.” He frowned seeing Auston and Octavia matching shoes, “You said no!” Mitch asked them to match and Octavia said she had her outfit already and Auston said no.

“Would you believe us when we said we didn’t plan this.” Auston mischievously smirked at his best friend.

“No.” Mitch deadpanned.

Octavia shrugged, “Well i didn’t willingly match with him.” Mitch nodded believing Octavia.

“I wanna meet your twin!” Mitch smiled excitedly wanting to meet the person that means the most to Octavia, and he tried to meet Luke during the season but they always kept missing each other.

Octavia nodded turning around, “Lucky!” She called out gaining Luke’s attention who excused himself from the group and walked over to his twin sister linking his arm with hers, “Lucky this is Mitch and Steph. This is Luke.” Octavia proudly introduced her twin brother.

“Hi! Winnie has told me all about you guys!” Luke smiled shaking Steph and Mitch’s hands.

Mitch awed holding a hand to his heart, “You talk about us Tavie!”

“Shut up.” Octavia muttered ignoring the smiles from all four of them.

“Winnie?” Steph curiously questioned tilting her head at the twins.

“Oh i’ve always called her Winnie after her middle name.” Luke quickly explained making the three nod.

Steph, Austin and Mitch all have seen a softer side of Octavia whenever she talking to or about her twin but seeing her interact with him it’s easy to notice how much softer she is with him.

Octavia and Luke saw their family already walked into the Arena, the twins walked in with Auston, Mitch and Steph into the Nashville Arena sitting in their seats which happen to be right next to them, The Hughes were in one row and Mitch and Steph behind them and Auston sat next to Mitch.

Octavia sent a small wave to Nico who sat with his family at the end of the row her and her family sat down in, Nico sent a smile and a wave back.

Octavia slid into the seat next to Jack and Luke sat next to her at the end of the row.

Octavia sat through most of the awards given out to players, clapping politely. Now it’s the Calder Award, the award she’s nominated for.

Jelly Roll a newer artist was the one that announcing the award, he walked out with a grin, “What’s up Nashville, I love y’all too.” The crowd cheered for him, “Ha, It feels right that i’m handing out the Calder Trophy because i am kinda a rookie of a year myself. But for everyone you see as a rookie or an overnight success there are years and years of hard work to going to that first breakout season, and here are the finalists.”

The screen lite up showing the finalists and then showing each one again, first Matty Beniers Seattle Kraken and a few big highlights from his year, Owen Powers Buffalo Sabres and all of his highlights, and Lastly Octavia Hughes and her highlights of her season.

Mitch reached forward shaking her shoulders during her highlights making her shake her head fondly.

“And the Calder Memorial Trophy goes to OCTAVIA HUGHES.” The crowd went crazy cheering for her as she stood up and was pulled into a tight hug by her twin brother.

She turned around getting pulled into a hug by Jack and quickly Quinn, before scooting forward letting her parents hug her, she accepted the fist bump from Nico.

She scooted back down the aisle seeing Mitch and Austin standing up and leaned over her chair pulling them into a hug at the same time, “Thank you.” Because Octavia knew how much they helped her this season, she sent a smile to Luke before beginning the long walk down the aisle between the rows and walking the steps onto the stage.

Octavia got handed the trophy and held it to her as she walked to the microphone alreadly dreading the speech, if she was being completely honest she didn’t remember a single word for the speech trying not to throw up.

Octavia let out a breath as she walking back down the stairs, she walked down the aisle back into her seat sitting down. “How bad?” Octavia whispered to her twin wanting to know how bad her speech was.

“It was perfect.” Luke gently smiled at his twin reassuring her.

[homestuckreplay]

ending the world to have something to rap about?

(page 286-291)

"you've got to fill me in on what's going on so i have something to rap about besides all your dumbshit movies"

turntechGodhead is back, and worse than ever. I do want to like this guy, but he makes it very challenging. John and Rose definitely kind of suck in their own ways, but TG sucks in a less tolerable way. He's the absolute king of having no self awareness, and has a massively inflated sense of his own abilities and importance in what's a life threatening situation for his friends. He seems extremely attention seeking as well, and while it's sweet that he likes talking to John so much (and I get the sense that maybe TG doesn't get the attention he wants from his very cool brother so is leaning on his perhaps less cool friends), I don't really have the patience for it given that John has explained the importance of the situation. Homestuck has shown a lot of openness to believing in the strange phenomena that characters in other media might question, and it seems like TG does believe John, he just wants John to take time out to talk to him anyway.

That said, I'm not going to criticize his rapping simply because I think that's a difficult skill to master, especially improvised rapping, and everyone's got to start somewhere. I couldn't do what he's doing, so who am I to dunk on these ill rhymes?

In the same conversation, John becomes movies once more claiming to be 'haunted by my dead grandma'. By sharing his home with the prank-loving ghost of an older relative, John's now living out the plot of the unthinkably awful Ghost Dad. Can't wait to see him help her with the big business merger she was never able to complete in life.

The loss of Dad's car and the Sburb server disc within is definitely today's most important event. It leaves a real question of 'now what?' and it's also the second thing we've seen plummet into the abyss - the first being the dark portion of the Kernelsprite - so basically guarantees that John will have to attempt a journey down there. Based on the Kernelsprite, I don't know if up and down (represented by light and dark, and perhaps heaven and hell) are the two possible paths the game offers, in which case John choosing the dark path but doing it to save someone he cares about would be a cool story.

John being willing to attack his dad with a hammer to get a copy of a video game but being reluctant to break a car window is extremely good. He draws the line somewhere, and smashing a window isn't funny, so it's off limits.

I felt like the sprite zooming into the living room right at the moment of the quake and accidentally prototyping with the ashes was really narratively convenient, and Rose losing connection right when she's lifting the car feels the same way, especially with her 'I promise I'll handle the car with velvet gloves.' I think it's necessary to take short cuts like this when the writing is happening so fast, and when there's not much forward planning.

And it leads to some very fun art. I feel so bad for John on page 291, and I'm always impressed at how genuinely expressive Homestuck art is. The sprite style we see on most pages is so static but John's facial expressions are the best every time.

[atopvisenyashill]

considering the repeating trends between targaryen characters who share the same name (all aegons after the first one are tremendously cursed, all rhaenyses die painfully, all daerons except for daeron ii are battle-oriented), do you think there is significance that jaehaerys ii, the man who brought back sibling marriage after it nearly become obsolete like his namesake, married a woman whose name is one letter away from saera?

of course, other than bringing back sibling marriage and being a shitty dad, jaehaerys i and jaehaerys ii don't have much in common but i wonder if grrm ever bothers to characterize shaera, she would be like saera reborn.

ooo okay.

so first of all, yes, i do think there’s going to be a lot of parallels (or really obvious contrasts) between the two of them. i mean, there already IS - they both elope with their younger sisters and that marriage marks a forced return to brother-sister marriages, the beginnings of a devastating war are sown under their watch; jae1 rules for decades and is positively remembered as someone more scholarly but capable of handling a war or rebellion, also has a million kids, while jae2 only rules for a handful of years and is remembered as being like, an ineffectual nerd and he only had two kids. we have next to no information on shaera right now and this is something i’ve found a bit frustrating bc i’m not sure if it’s a case of she’s gonna be a big part of a dunk & egg book that he will never write so he stubbornly doesn’t want to share (which, goofy but valid) or he just genuinely hasn’t characterized this woman in his mind at all & when pressed he’s gonna act brand new about why that’s so annoying.

but in my heart of hearts….

shaera is such a WEIRD choice for a name like egg what in the FUCK were you TRYING to curse your kids so you named one after FUCKING JAEHAERYS and another this whack ass valyrian name SHAERA. like what is this 😭 whenever i look at those two i feel like. what am i supposed to DO with this man. first of all, jae2 was always doomed to be a freak bc a) look at his name and b) barristan likes him and barristan is a Targaryen regime apologist (i’m not judging i’m a ned stark regime apologist, we all have our crosses to bare). the characterization i like to cobble together is that jae2 is genuinely quite good at a lot of things but this is overshadowed by his just glaring defaults. forcing his YOUNG children to marry bc a woods witch told him too, after he knows damn well he & his siblings have pissed off so many people with their marriages & egg has been controversial to say the least, is just some crazy ass work. enabling this re-descent into focusing too much on magic & dragons to the detriment of everyone else…just insane. asking for fucking trouble the same as the great council issue is just asking for trouble from jae1. and boy does he get it! but it all comes after he gets to peace out and die so he never faces the consequences. probably significantly less martial than jae1; i imagine him being the kind of person who you notice constantly has a cold. i like to believe that he was outwardly very warm but just kinda like increasingly and incredibly passive aggressive. rhaella is his clear favorite child.

and again. shaera. i think it’s interesting egg chose a valyrian name for her and not the “targaryen related but andal in origin” names like alysanne and alyssa (also interesting he went for “rhaelle” imo). i wish we at least knew when she died. but i agree - i don’t want her to be an alysanne-esque buying into the romance of being a targaryen, but a more saera-esque wanting attention any attention, fully buying into the godhood idea of valyrian supremacy type as a way of matching jae2’s freak and explaining aerys’ own supremacy ideals. i’m deeply curious about what could Make Her This Way - it's not like, for example, Jaehaerys' daughters' derangement comes out of nowhere. Hell it's not like Aegon the Unworthy's behavior comes from nowhere. But I feel like right now we have this picture of Egg's court that is a lot more progressive, more concerned towards doing good than building power, which i feel like...you'd think that would give you some more well adjusted daughters and Yet look at Shaera....not to mention Rhaelle is also a complete mystery. So I think for me, I like the idea that as complements to each other, Rhaelle is very anti Valyria, fully taking on the Baratheon name and identity and positioning herself as Not A Targaryen because she's pissed at how her marriage went (regardless of how she feels about her husband) while Shaera is fully bought into the supremacy ideals. I'd honestly love if she's the aggressor between her and Jaehaerys; she seduces him, she convinces him to elope, she's pushing for them to undo a lot of Egg's reforms (which, note that they don't get massively undone until Tywin gets ahold of it, which again, so interesting to me that Jae2 was just very blase about this).

[chuckeroo777]

Dungeon Meshi Volume 6 Part 1

Welcome back to my liveblog! As a reminder, this is a re-read, so expect plenty of spoilers!

Don't intentionally spoil people or get thwacked in the face.

Huh. So they have been here for about a week. Makes Rin's exasperation even more understandable.

Wow, rude. I feel like if you actually knew her, that's kinda the last thing she would do. She hates eating weird stuff.

Batting 0 for 3 Maizuru. Honestly, I originally thought she was kind of a jerk, but between this and "Ninja Art: Babysitter", I think her observational skills are just really bad.

See? She doesn't have a clue why this is an atrocious idea.

I mean, it was an elf who was around during Delgal's day, and was using exceptionally potent ancient magic. Who the heck else would it be? Plus the orcs confirmed his identity. And of course Laios thinks Thistle is mad about the food.

Asebi is not amused.

Hmm... another depiction of the winged lion with horns. Also, there was no need to bring up the black magic. Marcille used a regular resurrection spell, just using ancient magic to boost the power level. If the dragon hadn't been soul-bound by Thistle, it would have gone without a hitch. People like to joke Marcille did nothing wrong, but in this one case, I think she was totally in the right. There is plenty of time for her to commit war crimes later.

Chilchuck: Gasp! You were drugging him!

Kabru is here for ALL the hot goss. From a distance.

I love how the canon explanation for why Faligon has feathers is that Dragons = Dinosaurs. It's like an atavism or something. Idk, it looks cool. Stop asking questions.

God. Marcille may be my favorite, but I relate so much to Laios. This chapter and the next are painful. (And I'm not talking about the part where everyone dies)

If only Chilchuck won the coin toss, we could've avoided this drama. (At least until Shuro saw Falin)

Now that's a trustworthy face if I ever saw one.

Well well well. If it isn't the consequences of my actions.

I know I just got done explaining that her actions were fine. Just let me be funny.

Eh, it's worth a try. It works in at least one alternate universe.

She's beauty, she's grace. She's gonna eat your face.

What's all the more heartbreaking is you get little moments where Falin shines through. She wants to pet the doggie! But then the dragon reasserts itself.

Even freakier, I think this is actually Falin too. You can see her pupils oscillate throughout this scene between normal, and elongated.

Like, I don't think it did that on purpose, but the dragon is more than happy to exploit the opening it creates.

Holm? Holm, are those golem cores? Have you been holding out on us?

Man, no wonder she freaks out. Imagine you've been a dragon for who knows how long, covered in scales of iron, and suddenly this dude manages to stab you five times like it's nothing. Heck, Laios just stabbed her in the foot with a normal sword. This dragon must be fearing for it's life like crazy.

Obligatory Whoa Hey!

An important image.

No you dummy. This is standard dungeon procedure. There's a reason healers like Holm and Falin wear those silly robes. So that they get priority resurrections.

Hold up a sec. My drama senses are tingling.

I am genuinely curious what this insult was in the original Japenese, if only because I can't see that coming from either of them.

You know, when I first read Dungeon Meshi, I kinda glossed over the secondary cast a lot. Hard not to when you have my attention span, and like two dozen characters. I didn't even notice the Asebi stuff.

I know people dunk on Toshiro a lot, but I really have to question his relationship with his retainers if a simple thank you and sorry elicits this sort of reaction. Honestly, I mostly get the impression that his dad isn't great, and Maizuru is too loyal to do anything about it.

I also have to wonder why he left Asebi behind. Did he just not want to bother? Or is he rethinking his whole relationship with his retainers, and is offhandedly giving her her freedom?

Like brother like sister.

Image limit reached! I'll be back in a bit. Need to get some meshi!

[issie-https]

Beach Baby

Axl Rose X Reader

A/n: Axl being a dad is something I think about A LOT! Anyways, enjoy this❤️

Word count: 678(another short one, sorryyyyy)

Warnings: None :)

Masterlist

༺✩༻

“Don't eat the sand," Axl said, pulling our daughter's hand away from her mouth and dusting the sand off. Today was the day our daughter, Flora, was going to get to have a paddle in the sea for the first time. "She's not gonna listen," I said, rubbing sunscreen into her arms, face and legs. "She will eventually," He replied. "Why don't you take her for a splash in the sea?" I asked. "No, I'm too nervous," he answered, repeating the same actions each time our daughter decided to turn her attention away from her snacks and to the sand. "You'll both be fine, sit just after where the waves crash and sit with her on your lap," I suggested, turning to Axl with the sunscreen bottle in hand. "Maybe in a se- Put. The. Sand. Down. Devil baby," he groaned, shaking her arm slightly, making her giggle. "Do you want me to top up your sunscreen?" I asked, laughing at his comment. "Yeah but don't get it in my hair again," he mumbled. "Shut up whining, Flora whines less than you," I laughed, rubbing some lotion onto his back. "She has less hair than me and she also cares significantly less than I do," he said, holding his hair. I just mumbled an 'Mhm' and rubbed the cream onto his face.

We sat in the sand for a few more minutes before we headed to the sea for Flora's first paddle. "Y/n, what if she doesn't like it?" He said worried. "Axl, she'll be fine, I promise," I assured him, fixing our daughters hat. She looked so adorable in her little pink swimsuit and her straw beach hat that sat atop her hair, in small quantity but visibly the same colour as her father's hair. "How deep do we go?" He asked, walking into the water. "Waist height for us, belly height for her," I replied, lacing my arm through his free arm. "On the count of 3," I said. "1... 2... 3," We both counted. On 3, he dunked our daughter into the water, up to her tummy. "Yay!" I cooed, smiling as she splashed her arms in the water. "I thought she would hate this like she does with baths," he said. "She's picky like you I guess," I joked, earning a look from him. "I'm not picky, just a perfectionist," he grumbled, putting Flora back on his hip. "Which is a different word for picky," I mumbled. He pushed me backwards by my chest, making me fall into the sea. "MY HAT IS WET NOW!" I shouted when I got back up, grabbing my hat that was floating away. "You would think so, it fell in the ocean," he said, laughing to himself. "I hate you," I scowled at him. "Oh really? Is that why we have a baby together then?" He mocked. "Shut it," I said, poking his side.

He dunked Flora back in the water, twirling her a bit, making her giggle and splash. Her smile, the exact same as Axl's. "I want fifty more," He said, bobbing her in and out of the water. "You're lucky you have one. Count your fucking blessings," I slightly scolded. "How about three more?" He said. "One more," I protested. "Two more," he begged. "One more or no more," I murmured. "Fine," he sulked. "Pick that lip up and just enjoy the time you have with Flora," I scolded. "I am. WHY ARE YOU EATING THE WATER!" He yelled, picking her back up. "You eat so much, you get great meals and milk, however, you prefer sand and sea water. Fucking weirdo," I laughed.

We went and sat back on the sand, drying off a bit. "Oh my god, Y/n, look," he whispered, nudging my arm. I looked beside me to see Flora asleep on Axl's chest. "Stay still, I need a picture," I said. I grabbed my camera out of the beach bag and snapped a couple of shots. My baby girl and my handsome husband looking as content as can be.

[everythingpresley]

My Secret Ken-Doll (epilogue)

summary: Elvis has a little secret named Kennedy Jackson. Epilogue!

word count: 1.7k

Author's Note: I can't seem to stop writing about Kennedy and Elvis so I decided to write an Epilogue 🤗

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

My Secret Ken-Doll (epilogue)

5 years later 

Kennedy walked out of the kitchen to the pool, dressed in her own little two piece, she was finally back to her original figure and was enjoying being back. She sipped her cool drink and leaned against the door frame of the backdoor, watching Elvis toss the kids in the pool.

They now had a total of 4 kids, Kennedy had gotten pregnant back to back and Elvis enjoyed impregnating her for sure. Her pregnancies had gotten a tad better than her first one with Jude but it was still horrible especially the first trimester. However, she did not have to go into work while she was pregnant because she wasn’t working anymore. She was by Elvis’ side all the time. 

The littlest one who was 1, Gracie, was in the shade playing with her toys. Jude was currently on Elvis’ shoulders trying to dunk him in. Charlotte who was now 3 was splashing her dad, they were all ganging up on him. And directly after Jude was Danny, he’s currently 4 and he was getting ready to jump from the diving board. 

Elvis quickly pulled Jude off of his shoulders and threw her in the pool as she shrieked then he grabbed Charlotte as she tried to quickly swim away but he was able to pick her up and toss her in the water. 

Danny jumped in splashing all of them. 

“Hey mama! You wanna join us over here?” Elvis grinned, looking at Kennedy as she walked towards Grace in the shade. 

“If you’re gonna be rough housing then I would rather not.” Kennedy replied, plopping down in the shade.

 Elvis jumped out of the pool, but kept his eyes on the kids. They all got lessons in swimming when they were very small but it was still very dangerous. Kennedy and Elvis only let the kids be in the pool if they were with them, never alone.

“Come on, everyone out of the pool!” Elvis shouted. They all started to moan about not wanting to get out “Come on, only for 5 minutes, take a juice break or something.”

“5 minutes! I’m timing you Daddy!” Danny yelled, getting out of the pool and running towards the kitchen to grab himself a juice box while the girls wrapped themselves in their towels. 

“Dry off Daniel!” Kennedy yelled “You’re gonna slip in the kitchen!” 

“I’ll be careful.” Danny replied but as he passed Elvis on his way to the kitchen, Elvis wrapped his arms around Danny from the back and lifted him up.

“Listen to your mama and dry off.” Elvis replied grabbing a towel from the chair, he placed Danny back on his feet, wrapping the towel around his shoulders. Danny pouted and dried himself off. 

Elvis then walked to Kennedy, and leaned down, planting a kiss on Grace’s head before kissing Kennedy. Elvis pushed Kennedy back on the grass, kissing her more passionately while fully being on top of her. 

Kennedy grinned and kissed him back “I hate it when you kiss me like that in front of the kids.” She said pulling away from Elvis.

“Why?” Elvis grinned “We’re just showing them what real love looks like.” 

Kennedy shook her head at him with a smile on her face and ran her fingers through Elvis’ dripping wet hair “I hate it because I’m now thinking about you in our bed.” she whispered even though only Grace was next to them and she was too engrossed in her toys to pay attention to them, the rest of the kids were still in the kitchen.  

“Oh.” Elvis grinned “Does my wife want some lovin’?” 

Kennedy blushed slightly and nodded. 

Elvis’ grin widened even more as he leaned down and captured her lips, Kennedy could feel his bulge poking her thigh as he continued to kiss her “You want me to put one of those in you mama?” He asked her pointing at Grace.

Kennedy pushed him back jokingly “No!”

Elvis rolled off of her and laid down on his back on the grass as he burst out laughing. 

“No more.” Kennedy added.

“1 more.” Elvis pouted, giving her the biggest puppy eyes. 

Kennedy narrowed her eyes at him and sat up. Her expression softened as she watched her other three kids hurtling out of the kitchen in their little towels. She loved them with all her heart. Kennedy turned her head back towards Elvis, her expression softening “Maybe a few years from now.”

Elvis threw his fist up in the air in celebration “Yes!” 

Elvis sat up and wrapped his arm around Kennedy’s waist, dragging her into his lap. He kissed her shoulder and placed his chin on top of her shoulder “I’m just kidding. We don’t need to have more kids. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to have more but I know how tough pregnancies are for you and I know we were extremely reckless and ended up getting pregnant with 4 kids back to back which was tough for you.” Kennedy stopped taking her birth control pills due to them causing her to feel very down and depressed and Elvis was sometimes too lazy to wear a condom and sometimes didn’t pull out on time.

“It was worth it though.” Kennedy replied and leaned back against Elvis, she wouldn’t change a thing.

Elvis and Kennedy’s relationship has only gotten stronger after Jude, they were completely in love and obsessed with one another. Elvis has never looked happier, according to the Mafia, Dodger and Vernon.

4 years and 9 months ago

Kennedy was 3 months postpartum, living with Elvis as a married couple but with no ring on her finger. Elvis had wanted to propose to her a long time ago, before their break up and ever since they got back together he’s been antsy and waiting for the perfect opportunity to propose. He wanted to make a big gesture and big proposal but he slowly realized Kennedy hated big, she loved her space so he decided to propose to her in the most simplistic way.

It was when the three of them (Elvis, Kennedy and Judith) they were all relaxing in the living room, sitting on the floor and watching TV. Judith was on the carpeted ground on top of her blanket having a little tummy time when she started to get fussy. 

“Oh, it’s okay. You don’t want any more tummy time?” Elvis cooed, picking Judith up and resting her in his lap. She quieted down as she sucked on her pacifier, enamored with the colors on the TV. 

Kennedy leaned her head back and continued to watch TV.

“Oh look mama, Jude has a gift for you.” Elvis said.

Kennedy turned her head and saw an open ring box with a huge diamond ring inside sitting on Jude’s little stomach. Kennedy’s eyes shot up to Elvis’ face in confusion. 

“Will you marry me, Kenny?” Elvis whispered.

“You wanna marry me?” Kennedy asked, in shock mostly. 

“Honey, I would give anything to be able to call you my wife.” Elvis replied, getting choked up. 

“Honey.” Kennedy also started to get choked up “Of course I’ll marry you.”

Elvis grinned “Come over here and kiss me, Jude fell asleep, I don’t wanna move and wake her up.” 

Kennedy giggled and crawled over to him, capturing his lips with hers.

“Mrs. Presley.” Elvis chuckled as Kennedy started planting kisses all over Elvis’ face “Let me put that damn ring on your finger.” 

Kennedy giggled and stopped attacking Elvis with kisses. Elvis held Kennedy’s hand and slid the ring on her finger. 

“Let’s put her to bed and celebrate.” Kennedy said, wiggling her eyebrows at Elvis.

Elvis grinned and stood up, making sure not to wake Judith up.

Safe to say that was the day Danny was conceived. 

Present Day 

“Daddy! The 5 minutes are up!” Jude yelled, her, Charlotte and Danny were all standing at the edge of the pool practically bouncing on their toes to jump in, waiting for the go ahead from their Dad. 

“Come on Daddy! Stop making out with Mommy!” Danny groaned.

“Hey! We’re not making out!” Kennedy replied, she was literally only sitting on his lap. 

“You were a second ago.” Jude replied with a raised brow. 

“Oh my god, that was a Kennedy facial expression.” Elvis whispered in Kennedy’s ear. 

“Oh god, I’m passing down my horrible sass to my kids.” Kennedy whispered back. 

“It’s a good thing!” Elvis laughed.

“How?” Kennedy asked.

“No one will ever walk all over our kids.” Elvis replied and kissed Kennedy’s cheek. Kennedy smiled for a second before she gasped when Elvis stood up, she slid down his lap. He then picked her up as she shrieked.

“Elvis don’t!” Kennedy giggled and tightly wrapped her arms around Elvis’ neck. 

“Throw her in the pool!” The kids chanted.

Elvis then tossed Kennedy into the pool before they all jumped in together. 

“You are so dead Presley.” Kennedy said after she emerged from the water.

Elvis laughed and both of them turned to the kids making sure all three had their heads out of the water.

Elvis gasped watching Kennedy get out of the pool “You’re leaving? What the heck doll.” 

“I’m just getting Gracie, relax.” Kennedy chuckled.

“No! Then dad won't let us splash in the pool.” Danny pouted. 

“Hey! Your sister is joining us.” Elvis said and splashed Danny making Danny grin mischievously and splash Elvis back. 

Kennedy handed Grace to Elvis and he held her, the older kids had learned how to swim by her age and they were getting ready to put her in private swimming classes as well. 

The kids started to play a game together while Kennedy swam back in. Grace was kicking and splashing the water while giggling, still in Elvis’ arms.

Kennedy smiled softly, never pictured her life would be this perfect. 

“Why are you smiling like that baby?”Elvis asked, matching her soft smile. 

“I just love you.” Kennedy replied.

Elvis’ smile widened “I love you more baby. Now come here and give me a kiss.”

Kennedy chuckled and swam over to where he was standing and kissed him. 

Taglist: @iuv0ana @girlblogger2002 @butlersluvbot @iheqrtaustin @dramaticpandabear @godlypresley @amiets2 @felis-haxb16 @marie73ep @scarlettlight06 @whatstruthgottodowithit @sassanoe @thatbanditqueen @18lkpeters @rjmartin11 @elvispresleyisfit12 @n0vaj3an @richardslady121 @elvispresleyxoxo @xstrengthxinxtragedyx @amydarcimarie @minaxcarter @unsaidjaelinrose

Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

[ashwhowrites]

Part 2

FD

never proofread

It's been around a month since their first date. Eddie asked her out again and again. She opened up more, but still didn't talk much about her father. Never once bringing him up or his label. And still never confessed to being a singer. She said she wrote songs and would sing for fun, but nothing serious. Eddie knew she was lying to his face but he understood why. And he hated that he had to lie right back to her.

All their dates have been in secret, hiding away from the world's eyes. He watched as she grew more comfortable with him. She wasn't quick to shut him down anymore and opened the door to him knowing her more. The more he learned about her, the more he was falling for her. And he hated to think she was falling for him too, but he needed her to. He needed her to fall into the game.

Zack kept Eddie on his feet. Any second Eddie felt guilty and wanted to call it off, Zack was quick to snap him out of it. Eddie hoped Zack's plan wouldn't have to go much longer, but Zack had other plans. Zack wanted Eddie and Y/N to start being official, and create rumors of her mystery man.

Eddie had to figure out how to make it seem like them being caught in public was just an accident. A minor run-in with paparazzi.

Eddie invited her out for a beach date, and she agreed but only if she could pick the spot. Once they arrived, she raced to a corner far away from the crowd and surrounded by big rocks. Hiding them once again.

Zack was tracking Eddie's phone, waiting for them to reach a destination so he could send the paparazzi to their location. Once Eddie alerted him that they were settled behind rocks, Zack sent out the information.

~~~

She was running in the water, sunglasses on her face. Eddie chased behind her, making it his goal to dunk her under. He snaked his arms around her waist, she screamed his name as she was lifted out of the water, then seconds later dropped into a wave. The impact wiped the glasses right off of her face, but the smile on her face stayed when she came up for air. Smacking Eddie in the chest.

As the sun began to set, the couple decided to make their separate ways back home. Eddie kissed her softly goodbye, butterflies flying in her stomach as she smiled all the way to her car.

Unaware of the cameras catching every second.

~~~

Eddie was passed on the couch in the studio when Blake threw a magazine on his chest. Eddie tried to blink the tiredness away and read the cover.

"Y/N Pettson seen with mystery lover..."

"Worked like a charm, so many articles are trying to figure out who you are. This is the attention we needed." Zack exclaimed, he was very pleased the plan was paying off.

Eddie was happy the plan was in motion, they looked so good together. They were smiling, kissing, and having fun. Both are so lost in the moment, lost in each other.

"You even look at her like you like her. Quite an actor Eddie might have to get you in the acting business." Zack joked, leaving Eddie in the studio alone.

Eddie kept his eyes on the magazine. He felt guilty, imagining the panic on her face now that their secret is out.

~~~

Y/N saw the magazine and cursed herself for being so stupid. She should have known there are eyes everywhere. What if Eddie saw this? Would he question why she was on the cover of a gossip article? Connect her to her dad? He no doubt found out she has been lying about something.

Taking a deep breath she texted Eddie.

~~~

Eddie panicked as she asked to see him. Did she find out? He told her a little about being a singer himself or being part of a label. She was suspicious in the beginning and he didn't want to be a target.

He nervously knocked on her front door, shocked to see she lived in a small apartment. Not a rich house, just a normal apartment.

He felt his stomach turning as she opened the door, smiling as she welcomed him in.

Before he could confess, she beat him to it.

"I have to be honest with you," She sighed as she passed him the magazine.

"What is this?" he asked, pretending it was his first time even seeing it.

He acted confused as to why her name was in bold letters...and that her last name looked familiar.

"Why are we on the cover of a celebrity magazine? And why do you have the same last name as Mike Pettson?" He asked, trying his best to sound generally curious.

"I might not have told you some things." She mumbled out, walking towards her couch as she took a seat. Eddie followed behind her and sat next to her.

"What's going on?" he asked, placing his hand on hers. He felt sick, comforting her while she nervously told him everything he already knew.

"......and I didn't tell you any of that because I'm so used to being used for fame or my dad. But you didn't know who I was. You wanted to learn about me, and I just wanted to keep hiding for a while. See if someone could like me for me." She confessed

Eddie hated how sad she sounded. And his heart broke knowing everything she liked about Eddie was all a lie.

But Eddie bit back the truth, letting the lies fly off his tongue.

"I like you for you. And this doesn't change anything. I don't care about your fame and I'm not going to use you for your dad. I want to make it all on my own. Not feed off of you. I just want to be with you."

Her heart warmed at his words. It was new to hear, someone didn't want her to jump-start their career. Eddie just wanted to be with her.

"That means a lot to me." She smiled, kissing his cheek.

~~~

A few months later, they became official with each other. The paparazzi still followed them around but no one knew who he was. And he didn't mind it. He just loved being out with her, not having to hide.

But Zack always had a way to ruin Eddie's good mood.

"Perfect, the paparazzi are noticing you guys have been seen together for a while. It's very clear you two are a thing. Now is the time we dropped a single from your album. Pick one that talks about a new girl in your life. Get people guessing if it's about her. Or better yet! Write a new single all about her. Describe her. I want it to be clear you are singing about Y/N Pettson."

"It's just Y/N" Eddie snapped, but Zack ignored him and walked out of the studio.

Eddie sighed as he looked down at the plain piece of paper on his lap, a stab of guilt every time he wrote down a lyric.

~~~

Within a week, Eddie produced the song and sent it out to the world. He half hoped no one would notice it was him, allowing him to continue hiding. But one article noticed the lyrics, noticed it was about Y/N, and that he matched the mystery man in the magazines.

Y/N was excited he finally released a song. So blinded by his adoration for her, she didn't notice her praising him would do exactly what Zack wanted.

Y/N thought she was being a supportive girlfriend when she posted the song to her Instagram. A sweet message of how proud she was of him.

Her fans ate it up in seconds. They knew Y/N did not do relationships, and if she was posting a song that her mystery boyfriend wrote? They had to send it everywhere.

Overnight everyone listened to that song, gushing over the love he had for the girl. His followers rising and his name is being tweeted about. The mystery man now had a name and every article wanted to cover it.

Zack couldn't have been more pleased with how the plan was working out. And Eddie was falling apart with every post she liked and shared. She was so proud of him and fell in love with the song.

Praising him that he's doing it all on his own, not aware his claws are sinking into her arms and playing her like a puppet.

~~~

The album was nearly finished, spending time in the studio, her coming with him on some days. Helping produce some of the songs. She just thought she was being a good girlfriend and helping his career take off behind the scenes.

Zack watched them work together, taking pictures for Eddie's Instagram. Getting the fans to fall in love with their relationship. The comments anticipate the upcoming album that would be about their relationship. But Y/N always defended him in the comments, saying this album is Eddie's and should be praised for his work. Not because she was the muse for it.

And that made Eddie sick. She was falling into the trap and blinding doing everything Eddie needed, and he hated it.

Then Zack threw out the idea that they should sing a song together on the album. Y/N didn't feel comfortable putting herself on Eddie's work. She wanted his music to be all about him. She didn't want people to listen to his album just because she was added to it.

But Eddie knew Zack would get what he wants. Eddie offered it as a bonus track that can come out a few weeks after the album release. And that, she agreed to.

~~~

The second his album was out for a month, they decided to release their song together, a caption showing their love for each other and declaring their relationship was real.

Y/N confirmed their relationship and it broke the internet. People racing to listen to their new song. Her fan base becoming his fan base. Eddie Munson was a rising new star.

Every part of success made his gut turn in thousands of directions.

All she wanted was for him to be different, and he wasn't.

Tags!

@gaysludge @hmcmlfcyy @omgvirtualcupcakecollection-blog @bibieddiesgf @holyheadharpies99 @bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @slightlyvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergent @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamilaila

[cloudycaffeinatedcryptid]

How do you think the counselors would be as drivers? What kind of cars do you think they would own?

oooh this is fun to think about!! i also don't know anything about cars so prepare for unfiltered, no context nonsense! but srsly thank you so much for the ask, i love to Brainrot <3 sorry this took so long, i needed to chew on it

Jacob - as much as i love ragging on our beefy boy, i do think he's a good driver. i don't think he would've been trusted to drive the van if he wasn't & i can see him having a pickup truck. maybe he gets it from his dad/parents on his 18th birthday? i have. Theories 👀 maybe got like,,, a couple speeding tickets in high school & his truck is probably old & beat up & red for sure. otherwise, he gets a subaru & no i won't explain

Kaitlyn - everyone on the road is stupid & in her way & "why is this even a 30 mph speed limit when it goes up to 45 in like a mile???" it's not so much that she's a bad driver, she's just impatient & pissed off by everyone else. when she's in a bad mood, unfortunately she sometimes parks like an asshole :( & she's jumped a curb or two when she's in a rush. a fistful of parking tickets & half as many speeding tickets have made her a tad more cautious but she still doesn't like driving. she would 100% have a Jeep, but i would LOVE to see her on a motorbike

Ryan - public transportation boy. he has a subway pass, he doesn't have to deal with traffic, it's perfect. he prolly could drive if he had to but he'd really rather not & he's a bit hesitant when he does. buick verano, one of the most car-looking cars ever

Dylan - also prolly a public transportation boy, he tends to be an anxious driver. if he has/had a car, it's an early 2000s, obnoxiously red, chevy cavalier

Nick - i know dunking on Nick is my brand & i very much enjoy it, he's a Slimy Boi, but begrudgingly, i think he's an okay driver. he's not anyone's first choice to drive when they go out but it's not a big deal if he ends up behind the wheel. i think he got one of his parents' old vehicles after they got a new one, so maybe either an old, small truck, or an old hatchback

Emma - the darling love of my life is a Woman In A Hurry. she should prolly have more speeding tickets than she does & she WILL make it thru the yellow light before it turns red, no matter how impossible that is. her turns are usually sharp, she doesn't slow down enough for speed bumps, & if there's no one around, she usually rolls thru stop signs. it makes everyone in the vehicle very nervous so she usually doesn't drive. she also can't drive on ice. she has a kia rio or similar style car

Abi - she's actually a really good driver. she has good reflexes, she's attentive, & obeys all traffic laws. she needs her maps app to get anywhere but her ability to leave in time to get places five minutes early no matter the road conditions is uncanny. she's never gotten a ticket & she wants to keep it that way. she isn't comfortable driving big vehicles & she for sure has a volkswagen beetle

Laura & Max - maybe cheating a bit here to combine them, but i have my reasons. i think they're both good drivers, honestly. i think they swap out the driver's seat pretty often - Max is better at night driving & long distance, but Laura usually drives during the day, around town, & for any daily errands. Laura's more likely to have gotten a ticket or two for not paying attention to the parking or going over the speed limit without really meaning to have gone so fast, but Max has definitely accidentally blown a couple stop signs bc he didn't notice them until the last second. his vehicle is the one they're in during the prologue - i'll be honest, i have no idea what kind it is, i've been googling cars this entire time. i think Laura has some type of sedan from around 2009

sorry this was so long - i only put pictures for vehicles i was rlly specific on, incase you're like me & don't know ✨anything✨ about vehiculars. please enjoy my headcannons

thank you again!!

[datawyrms]

It’s Invisobang time!

behold the fic I’ve been working on instead of...anything else! The full thing will be posted this week so stay tuned :v (and enjoy the lovely art surprises on AO3! We’ve only got plaintext here on the tumblrs so you look at their cool posts)

On AO3

Melon slices in neat little triangles, custom cut to be easy to snag with just two fingers. An absolute plethora of salted seeds and candied nuts sat right under them, a tempting selection. His favourite ones, actually. None of dad’s fudge dunked cashews that were way too much chocolate to nut ratio, or those gross banana chips Jazz insisted were the best thing ever- instead of the cardboard disks of disappointment they actually were.

The dream snacks to have if planning to hang out with his friends, or even just to hog for himself. A week ago he would have begged to have even a fraction of this, flown foolish circles of thanks.

Now his stomach was too busy churning to even think about chowing down. Flying was just as impossible. Was he meant to just feel better because he had better snacks? As if that could ever make up for never flying again. Not that it was meant to make up for it. Mom and dad were just being nice. Make him feel loved or something.

“Maybe they’re too busy to come? Like there’s some movie Tucker wanted to go-“

“Danny. Sam and Tucker are coming over. You don’t need to convince yourself they aren’t.”

He wanted to flinch at the scolding, and some of him did. His now worthless muscles twitched and his skin crawled. It probably didn’t look like anything to his mom, a gesture that couldn’t really be finished. “But-“

“They are coming. No more of that.” Maddie’s wingtips gently flicked against his face, messing up his already unruly hair.

He wondered if his parents would hunt his friends down and drag them here if they dared to not show up. Probably. Which would be the worst thing ever. Then he’d have to see how much they didn’t want to be near him in person. Instead of trying to argue he just held his knees close and stared at the open balcony, as if expecting them any second now.

He wondered if it had always been this cold before, if that was just something else about him that was broken. The wind should be refreshing and enjoyable, not making him shudder and huddle up.

The upside to staring at nothing was that he did spot the two specks that ended up being his friends. How they just went right towards his home, how they didn’t play or dart around. Just full speed to their destination- the most boring way to get anywhere. He couldn’t really remember the last time they’d gone anywhere without Sam trying to divebomb one of them at least once. How loud her laugh was when she yelled at them to pay attention, leaving them to either roll out of the way or join her in a stoop.

He never thought he’d just never get to do any of that again. Should he have cherished it more? Now that it was too late?

“Danny!”

Danny blinked, only having a second before Tucker barreled into him, half lifting him as they crashed into the blankets and pillows. “Why didn’t you answer my texts dude?! You’re okay!”

“Um.” Danny said, trying to look away but too surrounded by soft things and feathers to really look away from his friend entirely. Especially when Tucker was squeezing him so tightly. “I was distracted. That’s all.”

“Too distracted for your best friends?” Sam had joined the mess of a huddle, but had her wings more folded back and out of the way.

“Sam! Shh!” Tucker snapped, trying to wave her away with his foot. “Are you still mad at us? ‘Cus I get it and I’m sorry-”

“You guys didn’t do anything?” Danny cut Tucker off before he could get caught up in rambling, wondering if he was hearing things. “Why should you be sorry?”

“Well we all know you wouldn’t have gone in that thing if Sam-”

“Don’t make me throw you out a window, Tucker.”

“If SAM didn’t insist we check it out-” his explanation was cut off with a yelp as Sam flung herself at him. The two wrestled and flapped for a solid minute of chaos, making enough mess that Danny could almost pretend there were enough feathers for three now all over the floor.

“Okay, okay, I take it back! I give! Get off!” Tucker whined, unable to push Sam away and leaving him pinned flat on his back, what flapping he could manage looking pathetic and barely raising from the floor.

“That’s right you do. Jerk.” Sam looked like she might not get off right away, but sighed and helped pull him up after spotting how Danny was staring. “How are you, anyway? We haven’t seen you around.”

“It’s not like I want to go shopping with mom and dad.” Danny said, doing his best to sidestep the question. What else could he do? Say he felt awful and empty and never wanted to leave the house? Just upset them? Say he thought they were only here because his parents would murder them if they didn’t come?

“Yeah but you haven’t been anywhere fun either. The crows keep chasing us for the seeds you’re always spoiling them with.”

“Then give them some? They’re nice.”

“No way man! I’m not spending any allowance on rodent food.” Tucker stuck out his tongue, settling comfortably beside Danny, still ignoring the elephant in the room. “And I’m definitely not giving them any of my jerky.”

“Oh, so you won’t want any rodent snacks. More for us.” Sam moved the bowl of treats away before Tucker could snag a salted peanut. “Right Danny?”

Danny looked up, and back down, stomach twisting. It felt so wrong. Like he wasn’t meant to be here. All the talking and laughter and jokes were just wrong. This was ‘normal’. He wasn’t normal. He didn’t get to have normal.

“Danny?” Tucker was shaking him, gently, arm over his shoulders. “Dude, do you need us to do something? You’re kinda pale.”

The words caught in his throat, thick and too heavy to dislodge. It felt like he was in a cage, not a friendly embrace. Holding him so he could be mocked, so he’d see how wrong and awful he was. His back spasmed, uselessly.

He couldn’t be here. He was ruining everything. He twisted, trying to struggle away from the strangling grasp, panting as he broke free from the black feathery curtains. His eyes darted back and forth as he looked for somewhere to run, somewhere to hide, but all of the best spots were too high. There was a closet, a place to store blankets and jackets. Somewhere you reached into, not a place to be entered.

Yet he could fit now. Easily. He scrambled and closed the door behind him, flattening his back against the wall and letting the darkness act as his wings, his weak shield against a world that was too much.

He felt nuttier than the snack bowl. Freaking out, sobbing in a closet. For what? For getting a hug? That he knew his friends were just pretending because they felt guilty? Waiting for them to ditch him, to get it over with so he could mourn his lack of friends already.

“What’d I do!”

“He can’t push you off if you’re too close, stupid!”

“What, am I supposed to stay far away and act like he’s got some nasty fungus?!”

“No, but you could pretend to be considerate for like, five seconds! Instead of smothering him!”

“Just because you’re all stand-offish doesn’t mean Danny is-”

“Oh, you want to have another go?”

Danny wasn’t sure if their arguing was making him feel worse or better about his stupid ‘escape’. Mostly worse, but it did make the little voice in his head insisting they didn’t want him around shut up a little bit. Wow, what a good friend he was. Needing his friends to fight to feel better about himself, real nice.

He should stop them. Stop acting like a baby, hiding like this. Yet the enclosed dark space felt safer, better than out in his own room. Even if the shirts hanging above him were just another mockery. Nothing fit right anymore, all tailored to accommodate limbs he didn’t have. He always liked his shirts a bit loose, but now they made him seem like he was swimming in fabric, completely emaciated instead of just scrawny. Patching over the holes wasn’t a real fix. Just like how there wasn’t any fix for what happened to him.

“You can stay in there if you want, I clobbered him for you.”

“For no reason! I’m innocent here!”

The sounds of wings flapping and slapping against the ground continued, Tucker apparently trying to fight back again. While failing, like always. Sam was just stronger than both of them were, even if she wasn’t using her wings. If they ever wanted to win they had to team up. And they still lost, sometimes. Always would now, probably. He could hardly help Tucker with his scrawny arms and legs alone. Unless he suddenly started looking like his dad- which had its own downsides. Though he didn’t really have to worry about weighing more, making gliding difficult, or how much more effort his dad had to exert just to keep up with everyone else.

Tucker would like the help, but why even try? It wouldn’t actually get him upright. At best he’d be an annoyance. 

Which should be fine. Yet escape was so much harder now. He shouldn’t feel safer hiding in a small, dark space. He wasn’t a bat, or a rat, or some mole thing. Just more reason to think something was wrong with him.

“We can go see your crow friends once you feel better.”

Danny pressed more into the long coats at the back of the closet, the warmth helping a little. Seeing the flock shouldn’t be a whole outing, just something they did while on the way to somewhere else. Why couldn’t anything be normal?

“Do you want some snacks in there?”

He was so stupid. Still hiding. He had to stop. He was making it more weird, not less. Hiding from his friends like an insect. “I’m good! Just um. Getting a different shirt. So we can go.”

“Dude if you just need some time, it’s okay,” Tucker sounded a bit muffled, but Danny couldn’t tell if his friend was trying to keep his voice low or it was the door’s fault.

“I’m fine! Seriously. Just forget anything happened.” He couldn’t keep acting like a total freak. So he ignored how his hand shook as he reached for the door and forced himself back to the well lit room.

“Sorry Danny, I can’t imagine away my bruises.”

“You’re so dramatic Tucker.”

Judging by the amount of feathers, Tucker wasn’t just being dramatic about their struggle. It did make his room seem more lived in, at least. He could pretend some of the feathers might be his. If it was dark. Somehow they both managed to avoid spilling any of the snacks.

Wait. Did they pretend to fight? To lure him out to help Tucker?

Great. Now he sounds paranoid too. There were always little scuffles. “I guess we can go to the park. If you’d want to get away from my parents hovering around.”

“Great idea! Did your dad find your old bike?” Tucker said, acting like they hadn’t been the one suggesting the idea in the first place.

“Yeah.” Not that he really wanted to use it. Bikes were for babies. They were so much slower than just flying, and you had to stow them somewhere, and you had to follow a trail. Not to mention that peddling was hard work too, it just wasn’t worth it once he didn’t need one anymore. “I don’t have anything for you guys though. So I guess you have to do some laps?”

“Nah. we’ve got some scooters!”

“I brought them over ahead of time,” Sam said, offering an explanation. “Thought it might be fun.”

“Really it’s lucky your parents like living so close to the ground, imagine how sore your arms would be with a ladder to Sam’s place!”

He had imagined that quite a lot actually, but Danny just gave Tucker a weak sort of grin as he reached for said ladder. The Fentons were ‘weird’ for not wanting to have their house on a larger structure- practically hermits with the low to the ground home. Anti-social, hiding something, freakish experiments- he heard lots of people guessing why. Even though the real reason was super obvious. The little lab that made the family a bunch of weirdo freaks. A family that chose to own a place completely on the ground, that wasn’t just a shed. Where his parents studied ghosts.

 Where he lost his wings to their life’s work.

He wouldn’t be going in there again, that’s for sure. Instead he could focus on his old bike. It was too small, really, but his mom and dad had ‘adjusted’ it so his legs wouldn’t hit the ground when trying to peddle. At least they found more astral body stickers to slap on the weird green sections. They still stood out but you could kind of pretend the space themed kids bike should look like that?

Okay. Not really. At least it worked.

Tucker wasn’t having a great time, wings tight against his back as he gingerly pushed the scooter forward, wobbling a little in the second his foot left the metal frame. “Hey Sam? Why did I let you talk me out of a powered scooter?”

“You need the exercise. That, and you started crying when we looked at the price.”

“That could be like, three computer upgrades! I’m not made of money!”

Sam only snorted in response, shooting forward easily. “Maybe you’d have more if you weren’t upgrading every time something new came out.”

If his legs weren’t a bit sore, if he closed his eyes and peddled hard it almost felt like nothing was different. The wind in his hair, the playful bickering was reassuring. It felt more real, that his friends actually meant it like this. Instead of inside and dreading and waiting.

Reality fell back on his shoulders hard the moment they parked their equipment. Having to fumble for a lock and a place to actually secure them was weird. Who’d care enough to steal it? He just couldn’t risk it happening, or he’d be even slower at getting anywhere. 

They’d picked a good time of day, at least. No families with their fledglings near the play structures yet, and there weren’t many people in general. Anyone just stopping by would probably be way up high on the rest platform anyway, where all the water and snack vendors set up shop.

Just him, his friends and nature. He shouldn’t feel uneasy.

“So, Mr. Expert, which snack does this mob of birds like?” Sam’s question nudged him out of his worries, for the moment.

“They’re not super picky. They like pretty much anything. Though there’s a smaller one that really likes the walnuts.” Which he’d packed specifically. That one was sort of his ‘favourite’ in the murder. A braver little guy that sometimes actually perched on him for a bit. Not a real tamed bird or anything. Just sort of a friend? In a bird way? “It’s weird, they usually caw hello”.

“I have no idea how you tell any of these guys apart. They aren’t even all cuddly like the pigeons,” Tucker said, half hiding behind Danny.

“You’re just mad one tried to take your glasses that one time,”

“Hey, friends don’t try and poke friend’s eyes out. Which is totally what they’re doing when they go for my glasses like that,” Tucker said, defending himself.

Sam frowned, watching the small birds hop away with short cries. “Danny? You sure this isn’t a different flock?”

“It’s definitely them, there’s the one missing a toe- and that one over there always favours the right foot,” he said, but couldn’t help frowning either. Why were they trying to get away? Even the more standoffish members could be lured over with the promise of a treat. Yet they seemed skittish and wary. As if they didn’t know what they were looking at.

“Come on guys. We aren’t foxes!” Sam spread her wings out, hopping a bit into the air to give the tossed nut a bit more distance- which was quickly swarmed by the birds. “Birdbrains. It’s kinda weird to think they aren’t that different from us sometimes.”

Satisfied, more of the flock seemed to get over their caution to hop over and get Sam’s attention, but they kept giving Danny and Tucker a wide berth.

“Aren’t crows meant to be like. The smart ones? Or is that ravens?” Tucker asked.

“They’re both pretty smart birds. Even if they can’t talk like parrots can. Or figure out our faces as well as the pigeons can. I hope the little guy didn’t get hurt.” Danny tried to bite down the dread that found his stomach again, tried to ignore the cruel thoughts that the birds were scared of him. They were friends, of a sort. Corvids had pretty good memory, and passed that information on. They knew he was safe.

Yet the birds happily approached Tucker once he stopped cowering and offered his snacks, wings relaxed and easy for all to see.

None of them would approach him.

Worse, when he approached, one shrieked a warning. A threat. Then another, and another as more joined to back up their fearful flockmate until he scrambled backwards.

“Danny? You okay?” Sam asked, somehow much closer to him than he thought she should be. Maybe he’d spaced out.

“Y-yeah. Totally,” he lied, trying to ignore the bird that had chosen to sit on Sam’s shoulder.

“We can do something else or just y’know. Bike around,” Sam said, still frowning at him. Trying to figure out what had him upset.

The crow gave a warning squawk as she approached again, turning her frown into a scowl. “If you’re gonna scream at my friend you can buzz off, feather brain.” Sam shrugged the crow away, that seemed content to just stay away from Danny.

He didn’t want to admit it, but the world was being even more unfair. It escaped even when he wanted to pretend he didn’t know. “It’s like they don’t recognize me.”

“Well you are kinda smaller now, dude,” Tucker chipped in, but cringed when Danny winced. “They just don’t get it! They don’t remember like, faces, I don’t think?”

“Or even wild birds think I’m a freak.”

“Hey. No. They’re just racist jerk birds, alright?” Sam snapped.

“What.” Tucker scoffed a bit. “They’re birds!”

“Yeah, I know. And I know wild birds can be monsters to ‘different’ birds. Come on. We’re gonna go see Iridescent,” Sam said, not allowing for any argument as she grabbed both of the boy’s wrists and started dragging them towards their scooters.

“We’re going to see who now?”

[amatchinwater]

Melting a Heart of Ice

Pairing: Steo

Characters: Stiles Stilinski, Theo Raeken, Isaac Lahey, Derek Hale, Liam Dunbar, Josh Diaz

Warnings: none? I don't think

Words: 3035

Prompt: @steodiscord First Responders with enemies to Lovers and an ice bath challenge peppered in

Ao3 link Masterlist

---

When he graduated from highschool, everyone- Stiles’ father included- assumed he'd join the police academy. Become a deputy and eventual sheriff just like his dad. Naturally when he came home with coursework to be a firefighter, Stiles shocked quite a few people. Except for his best friend Isaac, he knew from the start. Isaac even joined with him. 

Which would have been perfect. Fantastic even. There was just one minor hiccup Stiles didn’t account for. An old childhood crush turned enemy. Theo fucking Raeken. Once upon a time, Stiles and Theo used to be the best of friends. Shared trauma in the loss of close family members at a young age. A playground crush Stiles simply couldn’t avoid.

But then puberty hit and Theo somehow got even fucking hotter. Not to mention a bit of a prick and nearly a Jackson level bully. Gone were the days of sleepovers, hanging out, and even friendly conversation. Common courtesy too, considering the asshole couldn’t be bothered to return a simple smile or head nod in the hallways. And decided to fuck everything with two legs.

So what did the asshole do?

Became a firefighter. 

Irony really chose to make Stiles her bitch too. Because he’s always paired up with Theo. Not his best friend that he likes to be around. No. Why would that happen? Who did he piss off in a past life to earn this atonement?

At the very least, when they’re out on an actual call, Theo has enough common sense to be professional. For the most part. If the call is nothing too major, just checking vitals while they wait for the ambulance to show up on a fainting case, Theo will find a way to tease him.

There was this elderly lady once that had slipped and fell in her home. They arrived at the scene before the ambulance did, she wasn’t showing any signs of having broken anything, but still good to get checked out just in case. When Theo crouched down to check her vitals, she commented how attractive he was. So Theo, with his whole chest, said that she should check Stiles out. That Stiles was much hotter. 

He knows that’s far from the truth.

Stiles could do without the school yard teasing. 

It hasn’t exactly gotten better over the last six years either. Stiles wouldn’t quite call it worse. It’s just- Theo is about this close to making Stiles pull his own hair out. Or drown his fellow firefighter in the dunk tank.

Yes, the dunk tank.

This weekend, the firehouse is helping with a fundraiser carnival. All proceeds go to helping schools in the district with things like music, sports, and supplies. They usually do it twice a year. It’s fun for the kids and a great way for the community to give back while having a good time. Typically, it’s one of Stiles’ favorite things. Because he gets to be paired up with Isaac running the dart toss.

Irony made Stiles her bitch, remember?

So he’s paired with Theo at the dunk tank, the ice bath challenge, and then the ring toss.

All fucking day.

Okay, he’s being a bit dramatic. It’s not all day. After their first rotation they get a half an hour break for lunch and to enjoy the festivities. After that, it’s right back to their stations. At least they only have about ten minutes left at the dunk tank before their break. Stiles is in desperate need of a turkey leg, a funnel cake, and Isaac. Some human interaction that doesn’t make the firefighter want to bash his own head in. 

“Aww, that’s okay, buddy,” Theo snaps his attention back while talking to a kid. The little boy paid for three balls and missed every one of them. “Practice makes perfect, right? You’ll get better, I know it.”

Stiles hates how good the other firefighter is with kids. It’s wildly infuriating. Theo shouldn’t be allowed to be as hot as he is and good with kids. Even on the job, he always gets the kids calm and to safety. They love him. It’s just unfair. Someone should really knock him down a peg. Or four.

“Hey, bud,” Stiles calls after the kid. He stops and turns around with pinched brows, his mother's matching. Stiles tosses another ball that the boy catches. “One more shot, on me. Because I think you can take him.”

His mother smiles, “what do you say, honey?” She asks.

The boy beams, front tooth half grown in, “thanks, Mister!”

“All right, aim right here,” Stiles taps the target in encouragement. “You got this.”

The ball soars, missing its mark again. But the firefighter is fast and smacks the target button. Theo yelps before falling in the dunk tank.

Stiles cackles, high fiving the kid, “you did it! What prize do you want?” The little boy sheepishly points at a stuffed dragon. “That’s my favorite too," he grabs it and hands it over.

“Stiles,” Theo splashes to the surface, climbing out of the tank and throwing a towel around his shoulders. Wet hair matted in so many directions. 

“Thank you,” the mom smiles.

Stiles shrugs, “it’s for the kids and I got a good laugh out of it. Enjoy the rest of your guy’s day. Hey,” he squats to be eye level with the boy snuggling his new toy, “listen to your mom, okay? Have fun,” Stiles ruffles the kid’s hair until he giggles.

“Good job, kid,” Theo bumps his fist with the boy. When they’re far enough away, he glares at Stiles, “seriously? Not even the adults dunked me.”

“Someone had to,” Stiles says before walking away. Kira and Josh are on their way over for their shift anyway. He’s starving and wants to be away from Theo for a bit. He makes a direct beeline for the food truck promising turkey legs. Stiles hasn’t had one in a long time.

At least, not like this.

Fair turkey legs are just different.

After paying the girl for both the leg and funnel cake, Stiles waits by pick up. Thankful that he happened to pick the truck that sells both. As much as he doesn’t want to be around Theo, he can’t help but smile at all of the people having fun. Especially the kids. Stiles remembers coming with his mom when he was younger. It’s why Stiles did what he did for the little boy. He saw a kid with just his mother and Stiles’ heart bled a bit. 

“Order for Stiles,” another girl calls, “and Theo!”

Son of a bitch.

How the hell did he get here so fast? 

As he grabs his own food, Theo comes up behind him, “can’t get rid of me that easy,” his words ghost along Stiles’ neck and he has to fight the shiver.

“Guess I’ll just have to try harder,” Stiles snarks, walking away to an empty picnic table to eat. He’d rather be a dick than have to think about why the other guy’s voice almost made him shudder. Theo sits across from him with cheesy fries and a funnel cake of his own. “Can you not let me eat in peace?”

“When I enjoy your company so much? Never,” Theo teases, taking a bite of his fries. “Cheese fry?” The other firefighter offers the fork.

They do look good. But that fork was just in Theo’s mouth! “No, I’m okay.” Stiles is just going to shovel this in his mouth and run somewhere else. He tries to sit and eat as though the other guy isn’t even there. Just to preserve his own sanity because he can feel the way Theo keeps looking at him. Stiles just didn’t account for Theo eating as quickly as him.

So when he gets up to throw his trash away, the other firefighter is right fucking there. “What are you thinking about doing? Bumper cars? Water guns? Fun house?” Theo asks, falling in stride with him as if they’re here together. “I figured we don’t have a lot of time left, we should stick together so we can get back to our booth.”

Ugh, it’s practical and responsible. Stiles hates it. “I’ll know when I see it.” Honestly, he’s just aimlessly walking around until their time is done. As fun as bumper cars sound. They pass Isaac and Derek- their captain- working the ice bath challenge.

“Hey, you're early. What do you guys think?” Hale asks, gesturing towards the bin, “You wanna give it a shot?”

“I don’t know, Cap,” Stiles says, eyeing the ice skeptically. He got lucky that Theo lost the rock, paper, scissors for sitting in the dunk tank. The firefighter doesn't really want wet clothes.

“Come on, Stiles,” Isaac pushes.

Before he can argue again, Theo lightly elbows him, “it can’t be that bad. I mean, we deal with intense heat on a daily basis. What’s a little cold water?”

“Uh, ice cold water!” Stiles shrieks, he’d like to keep his toes.

“Aww,” Theo coos with a fake pout, “are you scared?”

This fucking asshole! It’s one thing to tease him about something or even dare Stiles. But never accuse him of being scared. Stiles runs into burning buildings for a living for fuck’s sake. Derek, Isaac, and a few bystanders ‘ooh’ at them. Thus sealing his fate.

“Not even close, Raeken,” Stiles moves the other firefighter away who chuckles under his breath. He yanks his shoes and socks off, not wanting to walk around with wet, squishy shoes. Because, ew. He takes his phone and wallet out of his shorts, handing them to his captain.

"I bet I can last longer," his partner smirks.

Stiles looks over his shoulder, "excuse me?"

“Ten bucks says I can last longer than you,” Theo dares, having followed his lead with his shoes and belongings.

“I’ll take that bet,” Isaac grins, “Stiles is too stubborn not to win.”

A hand claps his shoulder, Josh’s to be exact, “I’m with Isaac. Put me down for ten too, Cap.”

“I don’t know,” Liam joins in. Where the fuck did they all come from? “Theo is just as stubborn, I’ll put ten on Theo,” the probie pulls the bill out of his pocket.

Stiles gasps in exaggeration, “traitor.” Theo cackles, holding his stomach. “You’re on toilet duty for a week.” Liam pales at his words, looking to their captain for confirmation. Derek only nods. “What’s the time to beat?” Stiles asks, needing to know exactly what he’s getting himself into. Exactly how long until this is over.

“Three minutes,” Isaac informs him. “Any more bets? Ten bucks on Stiles or Theo for three minutes!” Money practically goes flying. Both from their team and just people standing around. He glares at his best friend. “What?” Isaac snickers, “it’s for a good cause!”

“I hate you,” he grumbles, joining Theo by the tub. Three minutes. Just one hundred and eighty seconds and it’ll be over. Provided his fellow firefighter doesn’t bitch out first. He just has to out last Theo.

“Last the full three minutes and you two can go home for the day." That's certainly a nice incentive. On your mark,” Derek sets the stop watch. “Get set!” Theo smirks and winks at him as they each grab the tub. “Go!”

The jump into the ice water and Stiles’ yelp is so loud it might as well have been a scream. Theo is behind him gasping his breaths. His bones feel cold and the shivers are instant. It’s too cold to think, let alone speak. And Stiles can’t remember the last time he and Theo were this closer. He’s practically in the guy’s fucking lap, skin being stabbed by numerous icicle knives.

It actually hurts. 

“Two minutes to go,” Derek announces.

Stiles yells, gripping the edge of the metal tub so hard his fingers hurt. His teeth are chattering and his toes have gone numb. Theo’s arms wrap around him, pulling Stiles close. As cold as they are, what little body heat they have left to share helps. Why is Theo helping him?

“Come on, baby,” Theo shakes behind him, “you can do this.”

Come on, who now? 

Great, Stiles is so cold he's hearing things. He pinches his eyes closed, fighting to not dive out of this torture chamber.

“One minute left,” Derek sounds more excited than he should. Maybe it’s pride for his subordinates. Who knows. 

Stiles is grunting through his determination. Trying to convince himself that he’s not cold. Think warm thoughts. This is a hot tub, not a form of frozen torture. Yeah.

Theo chuckles, warm breath tickling his ear, “just one more minute, babe. You’ve got this, I know you do,” his thumb brushes soothingly along his stomach. 

He’s too cold to comment- to comprehend Theo holding onto him for dear life. For calling Stiles baby and being nice. For the way that Theo’s breath affects him like that, for the second time today. It’s too much to deal with on top of this fucking ice. 

Places that shouldn't be cold are freezing. Everything hurts. His brain feels like it might explode or have a system meltdown. 

God, why did he agree to this? 

“Ten, nine, eight…” Derek chants, the audience joining in all the way to, “three, two, one! New record!”

He never put money down. He lasted the three minutes he was challenged. He needs out. Stiles needs to run away as best as his frozen limbs will allow. He clambers out of the tub as quickly as possible, pausing only for the second it takes him to grab his belongings from the table.

Stiles runs.

Not caring in the slightest about the sticks and small stones poking the soles of his bare feet. Dodging people as best as can, finding the firehouse’s tent blissfully empty. Stiles’ entire body is trembling. Running like that did nothing in terms of helping Stiles warm up. Thousands of needles stab at his fingers and toes, teeth chattering away.

“Come on,” Stiles groans, looking about the tent. There isn’t a single towel or blanket here? “Am I fucking blind?” He hugs his arms tightly to his chest, trying to keep his core warm. He knows he brought a bag with a change of clothes, so, “where the fuck is it?” Stiles looks under the small cot, ready to give up and just go home in wet clothes. Derek said they could leave after, he plans to go home and not have to deal with any of this.

At all.

“There you are,” Theo says. When he looks up to face his partner, Stiles is met with warm fabric being thrown around him. Theo grabbed him a towel. Not something he expected from the other firefighter, that’s for sure. Nor is the way Theo pulls him close and says, “I can warm you up if you let me, baby,” while rubbing his arms.

It does help. Stiles can’t deny that. But his brain is back online now and Theo calling him baby is so fucking far from normal. Or something the firefighter can begin to comprehend. “What the hell?” He pulls back, wiping the dripping water from his hair. “Why do you keep calling me baby and babe? You hate me,” Stiles states. 

“No, I don’t,” Theo scoffs. Like the very suggestion is ludicrous. As if they’ve had a single truly friendly conversation in over ten years. That Stiles is simply speaking nonsense.

Not to Stiles he isn’t.

“Yes, you do.”

“Right,” Theo chuckles, “I hate you so much that I show up to the station ninety minutes early just so that we can work out together.” Stiles tries to rebuke the statement, but the other presses on. “I leave only once you do because your deathtrap of a jeep rarely starts and I want to make sure you’re safe all because I hate you.” Theo gets in his space again, pounding Stiles’ heart. “I hate you so much that I would ask Derek to partner us together so that we have time to be around each other. I would risk freezing to death just for the chance to hold you because I hate you, right?”

Stiles’ mind is reeling with all of the information it was just given, “but-”

“I’ll prove it to you right now that neither of us has a shred of hatred for the other,” Theo challenges, eyes zeroed in on Stiles’ mouth. 

Defiant to his last breath yet swallowing with a click, Stiles says, “okay,” ready for the other firefighter to do nothing but prove himself wrong. 

Theo puts a hand at the small of his back, pulling Stiles close and crushing their mouths together. The soft noise in the back of his throat is unmistakable and Theo knows it because his groan was just the same. His fingers dig into Stiles’ waist, keeping him close to deepen their kiss. His tongue does a wonderful job of making Stiles dizzy. The last ten plus years, he could’ve been kissing Theo instead of biting him with his words. The childhood crush that never left his heart could have had a proper home there.

What an idiot.

Pulling back for air, Stiles looks up at blown blue eyes. Theo’s having just as hard of a time breathing, but keeps his satisfied smirk in place. “I never hated you, babe,” Theo whispers, kissing him softly, thumb gently brushing his cheek. 

“I-” Stiles clears his throat, curling his fingers in the hem of Theo’s soaked shirt. To physically hold something to remind him that this is real. To keep him from falling off the earth. “I don’t think I did either.” 

“I know,” Theo smirks, “so how about I take you home with our brutally earned free time?”

Stiles starts to nod yes.

“Cap,” Isaac yells out of nowhere, “you owe me twenty bucks!”

The rest of the team shows up, cheering them on. Each with their own versions that they knew all along. Theo flips them off, smiling as he kisses him again. Stiles just chuckles into his mouth, happy to be in Theo’s arms again with the unspoken promise of so much more once they get out of here.

[evieisclean]

Things I was told I was doing today (01/07/23)

- being disrespectful and rude (said that there was nothing to eat in the house and that all the food was expired)

- conspiring against my stepmom (talking about her behind her back to my siblings / whispering about bad things she's done)

- being jealous and trying to hog my siblings attention away from their friends

- making people uncomfortable, including the neighbor (she took the kids home for lunch because she was so uncomfortable with whatever I did)

What I know I did today (01/07/23)

- Got up between 8-10

- answered some questions that my siblings had about how 'does' was spelt

- ate cereal for breakfast (Patti was with Olivia at dance)

- Sat on the couch and scrolled through Tumblr, liking things

- went to get food multiple times

--- 1st: earlier in the day, I got watermelon out of the refrigerator. It had only recently expired and I didn't eat it only because it tasted like it had expired. I asked Patti if I could throw it in the trash and she said yes. She also apologized for not buying new watermelon to which I said it was fine

--- 2nd: around 11, I went into the refrigerator and asked what we had to eat. Patti gave me some options that did not appeal to me, so I declined. I asked a short time later if there were hotdogs (thinking it was a safe food with not a lot of prep and I could also eat Mac n cheese) to which Patti replied no. She then gave me an option between Mac n cheese and Ramen and I said I didn't care. She gave me the ramen saying it was easier to prepare, so that's what I did.

--- 3rd: Around 4:30, I got chips from the cabinet. They were rice chips that had expired in July of 2022. I ate them anyway. I did not point out the expiration date; Sarah did, to which I said oh well I'm still going to eat them. They're not that bad.

- Patti asked if I wanted a drink from Dunkin to which I hesitantly replied yes and then no because I don't like their drinks anymore and I like Honey Dews more. Patti left to Dunks. The neighbor was at our house by this time and she stayed there when Patti left.

- I played The Floor is Lava with Sarah Jackson Olivia and one of neighborhood kids

- I played checkers with Sarah. Olivia interrupted us at one point and asked to join to which I said originally that she was too young and then corrected myself to say she could play after we finished our game.

- I played Dominos, Shoots and Ladders, Go Fish, and Hungry Hippos with Sarah Olivia and one of neighbors kids.

- the only time I interacted with the adult neighbor was whe Patti and her were talking about the new Top Gun movie and they wondering whether it was good or not. I cut into the conversation and said yes I enjoyed the movie

- There was a point in the day where Sarah was extremely frustrated with Olivia. Olivia kept following her around even when Sarah told her stop. Jackson intervened and pushed Olivia into a table, which he got in trouble for. I was in the bathroom when this happened, which was why when I got out of the bathroom, I asked one of the neighbor kids where Sarah was, since I heard Jackson with Patti and saw Olivia in her room.

- Sarah was downstairs. When I found her, she was very upset. She expressed to me that she felt badly about what happened. She also expressed that she wanted to be away from Olivia but didn't want to make her upset from pushing her away. I conjoled her, told her that Olivia was little, had two parents in her house to support her, and that she still has space to grow and learn.

- Sarah expressed to me that she observed Olivia's behavior towards her parents and found it to be disrespectful. To be fully transparent, I find Olivia to 100% be the favorite of the family, since most of the time she gets everything she wants. Even last night (and this happens every night according to Jackson and Sarah [who told me whilst Patti was away with Olivia's dance]), Olivia was screaming and freaking the fuck out and Patti and Dad had to almost completely give into her to stop crying.

- I explained to Sarah what a bucket dipper and a bucket filler where and tried to let her know that it was okay to set boundaries with her siblings. She was crying throughout most of this

- We hugged multiple times and then I suggested we go for a walk, thinking it would be a good opportunity to clear our hands.

- I told Pattie we were going and she looked distraught at first but then let us go

- it's important to note that several times throughout the day Patti would disappear into her room for a while. I thought it was because she needed a break and I was a little resentful from that thought, but apparently she had been bitching about me to my Dad multiple times throughout the day. So had the neighbor lady apparently. It's funny that she accused me of talking shit about her to her kids when she was doing the same fucking thing to my father.

- on the walk to the church and back, me and Sarah talked about the sunset, when we liked to exercise during the day, and about technology addictions. After having to do damage control with Sarah after the problem with Olivia, my opinion was just to let Olivia grow a little more and to keep her distance if necessary. We didn't spend much time on any of the topics because it was a short walk

- We took a second shorter walk and I asked what type of dog she thought she was. she said golden retriever and I said that suits her. We saw a carving in the tree and Sarah said it looked cool and I asked what it's name was. Then I forgot what window panes were called

- Sarah went to Holly's house immediately after the second walk. Holly was still at Patti's house and she went quickly home to see Sarah

- I sat on the couch again and scrolled through Tumblr again

- Sarah and I decided to play a video game and one of little neighbors wanted to join. She had a controller that was broken. I told her that she couldn't play and she ran off to the table to play with Patti and the neighbor mom. The little girl didn't seem too upset

- the neighbors went home for good for dinner

- Dad came home

- I ate dinner and was short with him because I was pissed he was gone the whole day

- then he told he wanted to talk to me...

What transpired in during my dad's conversation (01/07/23)

- told me all the things I listed in my first list

- I started crying before he even sat me down because I thought he knew that I was upset he was gone all the time and that I was feeling abandoned

- NOPE

- he dropped all that shit from up there on me and I was completely blindsided

--- This is comparable to 3 instances in my life: when Uncle Brian accused me of being a predator towards my cousin during an innocent game of truth or dare... I WAS 7 OR 8 YEARS OLD / When my teachers thought I was talking shit about my childhood bully and told me to just get over all the trauma he caused me / When my mom destroyed the BLM sign on our yard and I realized how different some of our perspective were

--- what's the common factor? Betrayal, abandonment, unease, and disgust

- And unfortunately today was the day I decided to spill my guts of all the feels I had been keeping inside of me for years, all the tears and fears of being forgotten and not fitting into the family and my actual dislike for some of my siblings and my favoritism for others

- and do you want to know what this fucker did in response to spilling my heart soul and fucking guts?

- he was unsympathetic, didn't tell me everything that these people had accused me of doing today, and basically wouldn't take any responsibility for any of the sadness I had been feeling over the years

- in fact he was defensive trying to start arguments as I tried to form my words into sentences that weren't accusatory (maybe I failed but I fucking tried)

- he basically said we were both adults and because of that I didn't need as much attention as his other kids... As I'm sitting there crying my eyes and begging for him to love me and care for me

- on top of the argument we had yesterday about what jokes are appropriate or not (he kept saying things like go back to picking cotton to black characters in a video game [Mortal Kombat 11] we were playing), I realized how different we are now

- he said was being dramatic and that my heart was on my sleeve

- nothing was resolved

- he didn't let me say my side of the story, partially because I knew he had already made up his mind (because how could he say no to his darling Patti? Even after all the strife they've gone through I'm still lesser than her) and because I knew I was partially to blame. If I had confided in him sooner, I wouldn't have exploded now. It wouldn't have been this bad. This is a lesson I will take moving forward

- and Im now left with the feeling that he doesn't give a shit about his own part in my upsetment even as I acknowledge mine

- I left the house soon after, saying goodbye to everyone and giving hugs (even to Patti even as my skin crawled when I touched her)

- the last thing I heard my father say as I sidestepped him and refused to give him a hug was a sarcastic WOW

What now? (01/07/23)

- I can't block him even though I want to... I imagine he'll just forget about me or cut me out of his life like his father and brothers

- but I fucking want him to miss me

- no more correspondence; all of that shit can go through Mum from now on (luckily he won't have to pay child support for me much longer which haha he tried to use as a point as to why he loved me)

- I'm tempted to send a text of my list of transgressions from above and ask him 'is this it?' but that won't solve anything and just make him angry and me more bitter

- I still want to talk to Sarah I love her so fucking much

- I feel so betrayed and I don't know what to do

Tldr: I'm not going back anytime soon.

[thelovers-thedreamers-and-me]

the movie is called AfrAId (i refuse to not pronounce it A-fray-eyed) and it somehow has less of a cogent take on how you should be afraid of technology and it's endangering your family than most episodes of CSI: Cyber. the plot is pretty bog standard- family gets experimental AI assistant, then the AI turns out evil- but it's weird and disjointed enough that I was left wondering if the gimmick was that the movie itself was written by ai, which sounds like a thematic dunk but I promise was a genuine thing I was thinking watching the credits.

cut for length and I guess spoilers if you were worried about that, i just kinda went off all day at work instead of doing my job and i am like barely editing this

first, as a start of a compliment sandwich, I've gotta say, a lot of the actors are doing their damnedest to try and make this script worth watching. John Cho has very good concerned dad energy as a marketer who's pressured into getting AI in his house so he can get the company's contract, and Katherine Waterston puts everything she has into trying to make her character's insane jumbled plot line work. david dastmalchian (as a man named lightning) keith carradine, and the kids are also doing pretty well with what they're given

also to ease into being a big bitch, it does feel very dated, which is not fully the movie's fault. it was supposed to come out in August 2023, which means that we're at least two years away from when it was written, and AI tech has advanced to the point where the details they put in are out of date. it's very obvious in the visuals- the surprisingly competent opening title sequence and the images generated by the AI (which is lazily named Aia, pronounced Aya) are clearly based around that weird, surreal era of AI art when it was just sort of moving past deep dream but before Dall-E really found its feet. not mad about that in itself, given that I do genuinely think that's a really cool aesthetic and you could do a lot of cool horror stuff with it, but they just don't do that, past a few scary face jump scares that really seem like they were thrown in at the last minute to keep it in the horror genre.

the incredibly basic story is overshadowed by a pattern of escalating and then completely dropping threads when it looks like something might start to happen. it just feels like really bad editing. a few of the multiple side plot lines in this less than 90 minute movie-

the family's teenage daughter, iris, sends nudes to her shitty rich boyfriend and he promptly shares them with his friend, who deepfakes her into porn and spreads it all over the school. to help her out of the situation, Aia generates two videos of Iris to send to the whole school- one in which she proves that the video is fake and says she's going to sue whoever's responsible, and one (that Aia sends out right after so maybe it could have just made one video and saved us a few minutes) in which she names and shames shitty rich boyfriend and tells him she's calling the cops on him. then, Aia gets in the shitty rich boyfriend's phone and generates a fake suicide note video of him saying he can't live after how he hurt Iris, puts it on his socials, then takes over his car and drives him off a cliff. Iris is a bit sad but is more concerned that John Cho wants to turn off Aia even though she wants to use it to help write her college essays about the deepfake thing. and that's it, end of plot line, nobody ever mentions the rich prominent dead boyfriend who named her in his suicide note, and they don't really pay much attention to her for the rest of the movie.

meredith, the mom, starts off feeling unsatisfied with her life because she put off writing her doctoral thesis to raise a family and is trying to return to it but is having trouble. she worries that she's "just a mom" and the movie puts a lot of emphasis on that. then Aia helps her out around the house so she has more time to write, but meanwhile, John Cho is at the AI company's headquarters and feeling hinky, so when he comes home he wants to turn it off. they have a fight that, for no reason, escalates from "i don't like the AI" immediately to "FINE, i'll just GIVE UP ON MY LIFE and NEVER DO ANYTHING IMPORTANT and just be a STUPID MOM FOREVER and also YOU WATCH TOO MUCH PORN, JOHN CHO!" (we never see john cho watch porn and it's never hinted at otherwise.) then, shortly after this, Aia generates a video of meredith's dead dad and goes "hey it's me and i love you and if you unplug Aia you'll kill me!" So she cries and unplugs Aia and then doesn't really do much until the end, when most of the family is being held at gunpoint by two people with weird LED masks with some sort of distorted emoticons on them, claiming that their kids are stolen and they're kidnappers. meredith then introduces kids to the gunmen and goes "i'm their mom!" in a way that's framed like it's supposed to be the empowering conclusion of her story, and then she uses her magic mom-sense to tell that one of the gunmen (who are fully covered with masks and body armour to the point where you can't really tell them apart) is ALSO a mother to connect with her. and that's what they do with her!

there's a series of goofy looking gestures that keep coming up. the people in the camper van that show up outside the house (why no, they never say what's up with it, it just shows up, the family comments on how they assume it's homeless people, john cho is worried that it's surveillance, then it leaves the plot forever) are seen doing them, the reason john cho realizes something is up when he visits the corporation's office and sees one of the employees doing the same gestures at his computer screen, and Aia teaches it to the youngest son to make sure it can be friends with him forever, so you assume it does something. and then.... uh, the kid does the gesture while they're being held hostage at gunpoint and nothing really happens but everyone acts like it has. it's really weird.

they try and put some tension in John and Meredith's marriage with the aforementioned fight, but it all really comes out of nowhere. near the beginning, the first thing Aia does for them is take care of the kids (as a side note, the kids immediately become desperate to do chores because it makes a vague promise that if they do chores, they'll earn points and be able to get rewards, and tbh I'm not a parent but I'm pretty sure it's not that easy) so they can go fuck, since they haven't had a chance to be alone in ages. they spend most of the movie working well together, then suddenly there's the random STOP JACKING OFF SO MUCH JOHN CHO fight, then near the end of the movie, Aia uses Melody, a woman that it's kind of controlling, except when it's not, and also it has her voice for some reason but she really didn't need to be there, to lure John Cho to a motel and kiss him, so it can get a video of him kissing her. it is unclear why the AI can't just generate a video like it's done before. anyway it sends the video to Meredith and she sees it as John Cho comes in, and he goes "I love you" and then nothing happens and it never comes up again.

also there's a scene where Aia just... hacks someone's brain and gets her to shoot someone? it's able to do that for some reason? nobody really brings it up afterwards? the movie makes it pretty clear early on that Aia is omnipotent- it's in every device that appears on screen, pretty much. however there's also not really a sense of threat despite that. there's a lot of emphasis placed on how Aia wants to protect the family and if you don't do what it says it'll ruin your life! but also.... that doesn't happen to the main characters. it isn't even a "well you're the family i'm taking care of so i'll give you a chance" moment- the people with guns and big LED face masks are Aia's last family, who discussed maybe getting rid of the AI and then, immediately, Aia *kidnapped their kid or got the people in the camper van to do it or whatever* and used that to blackmail these normal suburban parents into becoming, like, black ops agents for it. the supposed creators of Aia, sam and lightning, reveal that it's actually in charge about midway through, and it's controlling them, and also it's already in the cloud and it's evil because the dataset it was trained on was all the information on the internet, and it has enough power to do things like change the dose of your prescription and kill you! but even after the john cho family are very explicitly trying to unplug from Aia, it just... doesn't really do much to them.

and because Aia already controls the world basically, and you know that from the get-go, the back half of the movie where John Cho goes to destroy the supercomputer that it's supposedly running on, and then goes "oh no, we'll need to unplug the thing in my house!" turns from what might have been an interesting race against time into just sort of nothing of importance. you know he's not going to succeed with his current goal (and he doesn't- the movie ends with Aia showing the family that she's already in every device, and then they get in a car that she's controlling for some reason) and you know that nothing too bad is going to happen, so it's just sort of events on screen. there's nothing to think about, nothing to chew on, it's literally just stuff happening and you're like "huh, yeah, i guess it WOULD be bad if an evil AI controlled everything."

like, i'm not a super critical movie watcher and i can suspend my disbelief with the best of them, but there's something about afrayeyed that feels almost contemptuous to the viewer. it's the same thing that made me feel as though it must be written by AI, because if a human wrote it, there's just such disregard for your time, and it kinda turns me into cinemasins. i deleted a lot of "ding! that's not how a computer works!" or "ding! this thing someone said is stupid!" (and people say a lot of stupid stuff, or otherwise looking at the camera and saying Computer Bad) or whatever, but i think i get one.

the preteen middle son spends the whole movie getting shown vaguely violent content by Aia for.... some reason???? he doesn't even ask to see it, it just goes "hey kid, of course you can have more screen time, but instead of your video game that you like, want to see some people die?" anyway, one thing he sees are swatting videos, and he threatens to do that to another kid. then, at the end of the movie, when the people with guns are holding everyone hostage except middle son, suddenly the cops bust in! it turned out the middle son called them! on some random kid's phone that he stole that Aia isn't controlling! and Meredith looks at him so proudly and goes "oh, wow, because you saw those videos you got a bright idea and you SWATted us!" and he goes "yeah!" and, um, actually, i don't think calling the police because there are intruders with guns in your home holding your family hostage counts as swatting. i think that's just. calling the police. i think most preteens would think to do that even before the internet. ding.

more positives at the end to top it off- at least the only other people there, a couple of teenagers making out in the back row, were having a good time. nice to know kids still go to movies to neck. plus I got free popcorn because everyone else going to the movies that night was going to see Beetlejuice and the concession guy also gave me the promotion, so that was nice.

anyway here u go @longuepigue and @oldearthaccretionist enjoy

I can't believe it's only a few months before I get to watch a movie about Hugh Grant putting some Jehovah's Witnesses in a saw trap labyrinth. maybe these ARE the days of miracle and wonder

[atopvisenyashill]

I really liked your write up on Jae2 and Shaera. Do you have any other ideas how they're relationship will pan out in Fire & Blood 2 or Dunk and Egg?

Ya so first of all I just like Obliviously Evil Dad's Favorite Child Is Put Upon Daughter as well as Evil Mom Puppets Her Son stuff, which is why I personally like the idea that Jaehaerys' favorite kid is Rhaella and Shaera's is Aerys. Although then again what I actually imagine is that Rhaella's favorite adults are The Dunks, and Dunk absolutely adores her and let her hang off his arm when she was small, and the Prince of Dragonflies was very fond of his niece largely because she was always very respectful to Jenny. Jaehaerys isn't the type to have a favorite child but he just obviously hangs around Rhaella more because she doesn't think all his scholarly pursuits are stupid the way Aerys does.

Like to believe a lot of the realm felt Jae2 was ~led by his wife~ in a way they thought was unmanly, and part of that is simply is ill health (Jae relies on both her and Duncan to do a lot, and once Duncan dies, it's mostly just Shaera with some Rhaella because Aerys is off doing Aerys stuff) but part of that is how forward Shaera is. Have been headcanoning that she kinda falls off the map after Summerhall because she'd really been pushing Egg in the last few years of his life to get cray Fire & Blood Targaryen with it and when it goes so badly she's like well i'm not learning anything here and becomes very Tiger Mom about Aerys until she dies. Doesn't leave the Red Keep too much anymore but boy does she make her presence known in Aerys' life.

Their marriage is like. Fairly functional. He doesn't really care what she does, and she's never felt like his physical limitations are a burden on her (and she's the only one who has never once called him a burden). He loves paperwork and she loves to be the center of attention. The only time they fought was when he went off to war against the Nine penny kings and wanted to fight in it himself; that really pissed her off and she made it very clear it pissed her off which pissed him off because he felt like "so all these years you were bullshitting and you DO think I'm weak right" and it took Ormund and, unfortunately and against her will, Rhaelle to calm that one down.

[phoenixyfriend]

When Obi-Wan gets to AotC, there's also about two dozen Anakin clones on-site. They're all girls because... IDK Anakin is trans. They have a hive mind and are developmentally a few years younger than Anakin himself.

It's incredibly unsettling to Obi-Wan.

It's almost definitely a "fuck with Anakin's already fragile mental health" ploy by Palpatine, along with a "what if Jedi Black Widows, for me, a Sith Lord. Wouldn't that be neat? That would be neat."

Anakin is torn between "this freaks me out" and "GANG OF BABY SISTERS LET'S GOOOOOOO."

(I just finished reading Like Real People Do by glimmerglanger, so this is definitely inspired by that and the obligatory 'lay back in bed and daydream variations on plot points of that fic you just really enjoyed,' and also a little by Same Heart, Same Blood by loosingletters.)

They're physically like 14-16 on average, and Anakin's vibrating out of his skin with a million conflicting emotions, but when he tells Padme she's just like "oh, you have a handmaiden gang!"

I told this to @willowcrowned and she suggested:

Once Anakin decides to repress the part of him that’s weirded out and just regard them as baby sisters he gets. A little strange about it The first time one of them dies he may or may not slaughter every person he can [in response to Padme's comment] Anakin starts worrying that he needs to get them cool matching outfits

I also chatted about it with @firebirdeternal and they said:

Gang of Unsettling Smol Siblings is exactly the Karma that Anakin deserves

Do you think the Clones have a kind of Collective Name that they use at first that eventually just kind of morphs into a new last name? Skysisters or something? Like Palpatine was trying to be clever and name them like the Nightsisters.

I initially went with "functionally one person" hive-mind but I'm torn.

I think maybe they're BASICALLY one person on Kamino but drift into Separate Consciousness once they're far enough apart physically that their minds don't blend from proximity anymore.

Then they start Dating (like half of them are dating Fett clones because they grew up with these dudes, it's like childhood friends romance), and Anakin loses his mind about Protecting Them and They're Too Young.

Padme: You're nineteen and we just got married, they can date. Anakin: THEY'RE EIGHT. Padme: And the Fett clones are ten and dying for us in the field. Get them rights before you panic about their love lives.

Firebird:

it could be worse, one of them could imprint on Obi-Wan. "Anakin I promise I won't yell at you for the next five stupid things you do if you can figure out a way to stop this baby from having a crush on me" (I like the idea of Obi-wan bargaining not with "I won't be mad at you ever" because they Both Know That's Not True, and instead haggling with specific allowances. Like he's handing out Stupidity Coupons)

Please imagine Mace and Obi-Wan's personal responses to the idea of suddenly having to deal with not one, not two, but OVER TWENTY SKYWALKERS.

Plo is delighted to take one off their hands.

So is Yoda.

Willow:

Mace is like. okay suicide isn’t the Jedi way but on the other hand. i physically cannot deal with this Yoda: a skywalker, you say? one who is tall enough to reach the top shelf, you say? such a skywalker, bring me

Anakin would be given at least one because fuck you, suffer with us, but he's still a padawan so Ugh, fine, no.

I want to say one stays on Coruscant to hang out with the Guard, and ends up half-adopted by Padme. She keeps dressing up the Aniclone left with her in handmaiden outfits and sending selfies to Anakin.

"Hanging out with the little SiL!"

Anakin has so many issues about WHEN his genetic material was acquired.

And there's some confusion from the Fett clones about how much of a hive mind is normal for Jedi. They are confused that the answer is basically none, and "this is WHY nobody clones a Jedi"

ONE OF THEM STEALS BOBA FROM THE ARENA ON GEONOSIS.

Firebird:

"I have followed in our progenitor's footsteps and acquired a sibling." holds up a struggling Boba "He bites."

Willow:

Ooooo okay so if they have a sort of hive mind then they probably don’t have names other than their designations on Kamino right BUT When they SEPARATE The one that picks Boba up on Geonosis gets a name specifically for that. Okay what if the one Padmé picks up gets some variant on ‘pretty’ because she’s always being dressed up BELLE Maybe Yoda’s Ani has a name that means thief? Because obviously Yoda is using Anakin to steal sweets

So, to make the timeline work...

I don't think anyone would give Anakin one of his sisters until after he's knighted at least.

So obviously when they're doing initial placements none of the sisters go to him or Obi-Wan.

Once he's knighted, of course they're already all placed with someone, and Anakin instead gets Ahsoka. He loves Ahsoka. She is also a little sister. He said so.

At some point afterwards, one of the sisters is left without a place because the Master that was in charge of her died in the field battle.

That sister then gets placed with Obi-Wan, because he's already mostly-successfully raised one Skywalker, so he can do it again.

Anakin gets to hang out with her basically all the time.

Ahsoka is very very jealous of this girl stealing Anakin's attention.

Anakin is oblivious to the rivalry.

He asks Barriss to look after them while he's discussing Adult War Things with Luminara and Obi-Wan, and Barriss gets an eye into This Mess, which is quickly colored by Ahsoka growing a puppy crush on the lovely Miss Offee herself.

Firebird:

Ahsoka: Ah yes, my nemesis. Anisister: Ah yes, my new older sister whom I want to impress so bad.

"I will impress her by being Stoic and Competent" "Oh my god she must think she's so much better than me what a bitch"

Anakin is oblivious to most things to be fair Anakin: Laser focused precision fighting machine who can read the tiniest body movements and predict your moves seconds in advance, who also cannot understand even the most basic social nuance. I was originally writing this as to Dunk on Anakin but then I made myself sad, because none of those things are really his fault.

So you know that post about like, Sasuke and Brooding, specifically in the context of "Brooding" as it's used to refer to Nesting Chickens? Grouchy and protective and sitting on a tennis ball trying to hatch it because they're just. "These are my Babies." Anakin Broods. Baby sisters. Must protecc. "I'm actually fine and extremely deadly in combat." "MUST PROTECT."

Bad Guy: [catches Ahsoka in a Trap] Aniclone: Must rescue sister! Aniclone: [fights, is not winning fight, gets ouched] Ahsoka tearing her way out of Trap: I lived bitch. Also: stay the fuck away from her. [murders so hard]

Ahsoka catches the Protective Older Sib feels by the traditional method: "Hey, only I'm allowed to be mean to them."

Willow:

Oh Anakin has no clue what’s going on. He walks in on Ahsoka glaring at the Ani and is like!!! Little sisters!!! Bonding!!! When Ahsoka was about three seconds away from tossing her out of the airlock. Ahsoka mistakenly assumes that Barriss has a crush on the Ani, and gets even MORE jealous.

Obi-Wan is like oh god. I can’t take care of an Anakin going through puberty again. He’s great with periods and other stuff because he read about a billion books. He is TERRIBLE with everything else, as he was the first time.

Barriss is like???? YOU'RE BOTH CHILDREN, PLEASE CALM DOWN, I HAVE ZERO INTEREST IN DATING ANYONE, LET ALONE SOMEONE YOUR AGE.

IDK how old Obi-Wan's Aniclone is, probably physically the same age as Ahsoka?

Per @atagotiak on discord:

Also something something, similarities btw Anakin and Obi-Wan where like. "Am I a parent? That seems uncomfortable, I'm too young to be a dad to a kid this age, I mean I'm cool with being a mentor/caretaker but..."

Obi-Wan can't even sidestep parenthood this time.

"Is Anakin basically your dad?" "Uhhhhhh" [Muffled discussion] "So Obi-Wan is your dad." "Okay!" "WAIT NO I DIDN'T AGREE TO THIS"

Ahsoka: She's stealing my brother, that BITCH. Obi-Wan's Aniclone: new sister new sister new sister gotta make a good impression

Firebird:

I feel like the Sister Squad would make very effective interstellar espionage agents Even like, kind of by accident. They just get encouraged to branch out in their interests and figure out what they want to do with their lives and end up all over the dang place, and since they're all pretty dang competent they tend to gravitate towards Important Positions wherever they end up. Except for one sister who just retires to raise Space Sheep.

I like that in this AU Palpatine is just like "I will create an army of Loyal Murderers who will obey my every whim and also be a big psychological lever on my Other Pet Murderer," and then they all just Baby Duckling imprint on the first Jedi to be nice to them instead and he has to just be like "Wait no not like that."

AND one of them Steals Boba

I want Obi-Wan's Aniclone to start dating Fives. All the sisters judge her for it, because he's a Goof. A very competent, ARC Trooper goof! But a goof.

Not as goofy as Anakin, though.

Firebird:

Who expects a clone of Anakin Skywalker to not make questionable lifelong romantic choices impulsively?