#but she really sucks at apologizing
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i really like nami and jinbe's relationship but i completely forgot that she makes him like actually sob tears of guilt/gratefulness on their first meeting just from how like. magnanimous she was about the whole arlong thing. like she was living proof of all his fears for the east blue and still forgave him and her hearing arlong's past/the full history of fishman persecution was a big step in contextualizing her own trauma. i literally just thought she liked him cause she was happy she no longer had to sail the entire ship by herself <3
#forgave is the wrong word she didnt even let him apologize to her#i really like nami like what else is new but her 'yeah my life sucked but im having fun now w/ my friends <3' lady i would die for you#but yeah i thought it was whole cake that did it. the scene where he grabs the rigging and she looks so relieved is so famous 2 me#or even when she was like fuck jimbe get the wheel i have to singlehandedly load extremely heavy barrels of cola in the engine and hes like#ok???? i can do that but ok. wci was the first time i was like this ship is SO BIG how are they sailing with only half the crew#cat burglar nami#jinbei#jimbei#one piece
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do not let caseys sunshiness distract you from the fact that she is just as much emotionally constipated as ludger.
#academy's undercover professor spoilers#academy's undercover professor#casey selmore#the fact that casey has never told anyone including betty and terinna about delica/memory storming events is so wild to me#like girlie why r u suffering from all that by urself#ppl hating on casey for having negative EQ but that only reflects how much emotional support she usually gets from others#case in point: marias selmore#wouldnt surprise me if casey has never trusted to emotionally open up to anyone ever again when its her own family treating her like that#in her entire life casey is close to only 4 ppl but they are either:#1) her sister who historically sucks#2) bestie no. 1 who is almost always swarmed with work#3) bestie no. 2 who once again gave her trust and abandonment issues#4) bestie no. 3 who is not even a human but an automaton also learning how to deal with her own emotions#not to mention to maintain her reputation as a renowned detective she must have been neglecting her own emotional needs#casey selmore my beloved just because you dont look at it doesnt mean it is not there#casey tryna brush off her emotions after the memory storming and seek to solve the problem logically like a thinker she is but#she didnt realise that she was just delaying the inevitable and so the basara arc hit her like a truck + left her bedridden for a month 💀#caseys apologies to ludger only really solved the problem on logical terms#but there is never any emotional closure between them bc they are both painfully emotionally constipated so back to suffering we go 💀💀💀#lesson learnt from ludgercasey angst galore: stop trying to solve emotional problems with logics
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Tomorrow Is Election Day And I Am So Fucking Stressed
#marzi speaks#marzivents#hi folks. i haven’t been making much art lately. apologies! i want to be#unfortunately shit is Stressful in both my little world (i’m starting to get overwhelmed with my meds and refills and driving)#and on a broader more societal scale (if trump gets re-elected shit is going to go so fucking bad oh my god)#PLUS we’re in the It Gets Dark At 6PM Zone now#i think i’ve lowkey been catastrophizing a bit with all that’s been going on#i should probs look into those psych referrals my doctor gave me#she offered them bc the almost-dying earlier this year was Traumatic and i was showing signs of anxiety/depression#but i think they’ll just be helpful in general#god though i hate being on prescriptions. it feels like there’s a constant timer hanging over my head#refill these pills before this time so you don’t have to miss a day. woops! the pharmacy’s out of stock on this one#so you’ll have to come back at another less convenient time. fail to do so and the medication goes on hold#which requires a phone call where you speak to a Robot that may not understand the nuances of ur situation#grrrgh it sucks so bad. thankfully i refilled my prednisone the other day and have like 3 months’ worth now#and that’s the one i really can’t afford to miss bc steroid withdrawals could really fuck me up#but uggghhh i hate it. so much. bc it looms over me always#i hate keeping track of when i’ve taken my pills too. i keep a checklist for every day#so i remember what i have to take and if i’ve taken it#but god it sucks. i’m at the point where it’s basically routine now so i do it automatically#but i know if i stop monitoring i’m gonna forget if i’ve taken my steroid one day#and either double dose or skip the day. and that’ll fuck me up pretty good#anyways. hoping hoping hoping this election goes well bc idk if i can take it if our country tis of thee elects the fucking fascist#this one’s fine to rb. i think many of us share this sentiment lmao
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oh come on, where’s my option to join forces and two team them? or cheer her on from the sidelines even. chie can wreck shit actually i don’t want to deny her that
#didn’t even have enough courage to hold her back i just HAD to step in#this just kinda sucks. it’s moderately Off#there’s just this nasty misogynistic undercurrent here#chie can fight her own battles. i wish i had the option to support her in them instead of taking them for her#this really rubs me the wrong way cause it feels like it’s a step to the left of doing anything interesting#chie’s learning the wrong lesson for this to be an (intentional and purposeful) example of misogyny she faces#and it’s too misogynistic to be ‘fighting isn’t always the answer and you’re not alone anymore’ like it’s trying to do#why is she thanking me i didn’t do shit. if anything i slighted her. this is simply not very good#rambles#p4g posting#this isn’t quite downright rancid but more than anything it’s just not very good writing#everything once she apologizes (which she shouldn’t do) feels like a completely different beat#chie i’m so sorry you’re in persona 4#i feel like i’m gonna have said that about every teammate
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Hate having adhd went to go work on my fallout modpack, got distracted while going to disable the steam overlay, ended up in the points shop, went to go edit my profile, decided to change my pfp, found a buried folder I forgot existed, found some old Veneer art I forgot existed, spent 45 minutes looking at all the old photos, STILL HAVE NOT TOGGLED ONE SIMPLE OPTION THAT SHOULD'VE TAKEN 30 SECONDS AT MOST
#I'm shocked I have these drawings scanned on my pc I don't remember doing that I must've done it before I left in case my mom threw all my#Art out again#Anyway at age 12 I was writing a better '3 merpeople go on land to find a 4th one that has been disguised as a human all his life' story#Than Ma/ko Merm/aids EVER did so uh. Take that Jonathan#God it sucks so bad that kid me would've LOVED MM if it just DIDN'T HAVE THE STUPID GENDER WAR BULLSHIT#Literally the entire first and second season is just. So fucking stupid. I wrote a God damn essay about how they fumbled Erik's story SO BAD#I don't even LIKE Erik BUT THEY DID HIM SO DIRTY#THE CHARACTER POTENTIAL AND WRITING COULD'VE BEEN BETTER THAN ZANE B. S1 OF H2O BUT THEY THREW IT AWAY AND FOR WHAT!!!!!!!#Seriously you're telling me a kid who was abandoned his entire life for being male didn't have a bigger impact on the pod than FUCKING ZAK?#That plot twist of 'oh actually Zak was a merman all along' was 100% so they could guilt free write Erik out#Instead of like. Having him face his actions or redeem himself in like. Any way. He just fucks off. THEN the pod is like lol Zac were sorry#We're sorry for literally not doing anything to you because you were privledged enough to have a mother who was super ultra powerful#So you were never really affected by our actions until JUST now. Unlike that other fuckface Erik who suffered his whole life alone#Also then in s3 there are STILL no mermen in the pod. Not even little mermen babies. No kids and teens they've welcomed back n apologized to#NOTHING#God. Mm pisses me off dude#AND I STILL HAVENT TOGGLED THAT FUCKING OPTIONS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#Cruddy rambles#God I'm not done I'm sorry fallout can wait YOU ARE TELLING ME THE GUY WHO TELLS US HOW SHITTY MERMAN BABIES R TREATED BY THE POD. IS NOT#THE SAME ONE THE POD APOLOGIZES TO IN THE SEASON FINALE BECAUSE THEY WROTE IN A SHITTY PLOT TWIST?#AUUUUUUUHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG#It's so bad. It's so fucking bad. It's so needlessly gendered and for what. They could've just had 2 rival warring pods#What pisses me off the most is that s3 (4) completely pivots and never really follows thru with the s1 and 2 story arcs#The writers just kinda wash thsir hands of that because 'hey the pod said sorry to zac' BUT THEN NOTHING ACTUALLY CHANGES!!!!#Maybe instead of having a constantly rotating cast of characters s3 (4) could've instead focused on Ondina and Erik's relationship a bit#Maybe have Ondina tell him she wants to just stay friends because she can't trust him. Have him IDK grow and change as a character?#Maybe so you can show kids nobody is born evil and we all need support systems and healthy relationships to grow and become better people??#THAT would've been a GOOD FOLLOW THROUGH#But no instead u just write him out of the show and never show any OTHER mermen who were exiled being welcomed back#Like u had Ondina becoming a teacher... Why not have Zac become a teacher for all the new mermen who were just recently welcomed back??
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Sending you love and support during this fucked up situation 💕💖💕💖💕
Thank you 💖💖💖
#I'll be ok#I genuinely just don't want other people to go through what I and others have gone through with her#she obvs hasn't learned her lesson from my perspective#and fwiw I'm not trying to like#tear her down or kick her off the internet#if she really came forward with an apology#even if it's not for me cause yeah I've been bitchy through this situation and she doesn't have to forgive me either#I'd at least listen and chill out on my end#like it sucks but what sucks worse is knowing she hasn't learned or changed and could hurt others#for now she's just not the safe person she tries to pretend she is and uses her status to manipulate people and that's not cool#ask
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Also sorry I'm inevitably gonna b talking a lot about the breakup bc I got a lot of feelings to process. I sure didn't see it coming, so I didn't get any time to prepare for it.
#speculation nation#sometimes ur in a perfectly happy relationship and then outta nowhere she just drops u...#maybe this is karma for my last relationship. i did a kind of similar thing#though we Had had some problems. so there was some leadup to it. she just didnt realize it.#i at least had the grace to break up with her in person. it sucked but it was the respectful thing to do.#6 months in a relationship only to break up over text... im forever gonna be pissed at this.#i'll have my satisfaction when i next see her. which is supposed to be tomorrow but who fucking knows now.#after she stood me up yesterday and then chickened out of seeing me today. bc shes such a coward lol.#ive had my nice face on around her all the times we were together bc i like her#but she's gonna see my bitch side tomorrow. or whenever she comes by to drop off the shit.#ill try not to be Too nasty... but i will definitely be plenty cold lol.#might have a few words for her too. bc she really does deserve to see who exactly she's hurting.#she cant hide behind a screen and her infinite apologies forever. fucking coward.
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Please let cass grope donnie like your april post lol 🙏
Haha yeeeeah nope XD
Casey may be one of Donnie closest friend (not that he consider her, his friend or anything, it'd be ridiculous), but they still have boundaries.
Want to tease him? Yes (a middle finger in front his nose, poking him without touching him, ...).
Piss him off? Yes (Dropping baby duty on him outta nowhere, messing up his schedule, ...).
Make him uncomfortable? Yes (running after him when covered in mud and unknown substances, dropping an unknown substances right on his hand and tell him to analyse it ~~that bitch~~, ....).
To the point of really upsetting him? Probably not.
As funny as that is, excessive or inappropriate touching (to Donnie) are off the table. Donnie would be truly mad and get physical and no one wants that, even Casey. She learned it at her own expense.
The first (and the last) time it happened, Donnie almost bites her hand off and yelled to "fuck off". It was so awkward and unexpected that she angrily busted out his lab, mumbling "sensitive prick". Later, she came back and dropped some "junks" on his desk, that he has asked for to the supply group, long ago. And left as fast as she came, screaming "You better be- ohandimsorrybytheway-not mad after this, got it?!"
#Donnie was just ???#something's wrong with your grammar Jones#And they became frends again#happy ending yaaayyy#Casey was embarrassed cuz#she new she really messed up#and she sucks at apologizing#XDD#fee ask#future!Casey#future!Donnie
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youtube
Honestly I have to give “weirdest apologies of all time” to just dance’s Cygnus. He dooms his reality by simping too hard-and has to go onto a dance completion a la Eurovision to apologize.
At least he didn’t break out a ukulele
#Youtube#and like a classic influencer apology he’s not even really sorry#he’s in his factory and can’t leave#and he’s literally standing there going ‘sucks to be you guys. I did it and I’d do it again#but at least I left when it got too bad#my boy…#I do have to give it to him though#of all the characters to simp she’s not the worst
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so much you have added to fx backstory au in your head you say… please feel free to take this excuse to share to your heart’s content… 💐
alex from the future here: this started as a note i was gonna let rot in my drafts and turned into A WHOLE ASS SCENE WITH DIALOGUE AND E'RYTHIN so i decided to copy and paste it here... anyway i have THOUGHTS about feng xin's family and especially his SPITFIRE of an older sister, shen liang...
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS and omg thank you for sending an ask im overflowing with thoughts of them... see #fx backstory au for more
~
sometimes i like to think about young Shen Liang before her brother was born...
yknow that excited phase some girls have about babies when theyre like 13?
my girl was READY to be a big sister
ready doesnt even being to describe it...
"Xin-er!" she'd talk to Shen Wangxi's belly relentlessly as if he'd already been born... if he even was a "he"
she'd be happy with a didi or a meimei she did not care
she read every bit of prep material from the royal library at least 3 times over
she talked with her mom about how she'd be the best jiejie ever...
she was SO EXCITED
So much so that Shen Wangxi knew Shen Liang could take care of her brother.
That is, until Feng Xin was born...
The event essentially trades her mothers life for her brothers... Shen Liang has the capability to care for her didi, but she isn't too interested in the parasite that stole her mom from her...
But this "parasite" continues to grow more fond of her regardless of how horribly she treats him.
.
"Jiejie is family. I love my family. And Baba tells me all the time i need to protect the things I love. I'll protect you jiejie!" A tiny Feng Xin puffs out his chest and makes a face that he thinks will make him look tough.
"Like how you protected mama?" Shen Liang mutters to herself, standing up from the dirt she'd been kicked down into by that goodfornothing bully and uselessly patting dust off her robes before knocking past him.
"Enough, A-Liang. He's three, he doesn't understand."
No. You don't understand. "Get lost, old man." Shen Liang quips toward her father.
Feng Yang lets her leave. Teenagers. At least she was safe now. This harassment was getting out of hand. He'd hate to take it directly to the king.
"But..." a tiny voice pokes out from behind the contemplating Xianle general.
Feng Yang bends down to pick up his son and rest him on his hip.
Tiny hands grab the fabric of his robes as Feng Xin rubs his head against his fathers chest to comfort himself and he mumbles, "Jiejie... I'll protect you, jiejie, I promise."
Feng Yang's heart aches from his son's words. It swells in his chest until it almost pops and then...
"Baba?"
"Yes, Xin-er?" Feng Yang answers softly with a smile.
Feng Xin chews on the age-old words of the Feng family code, and then speaks. "Well... what does a man do... when he can't protect what he loves." His voice attempts to mimic the commanding tone of his fathers own.
Well... "He tries to get stronger."
Feng Xin's eyes brighten.
Feng Yang is blessed to have this child as his son.
"Baba?"
"Hm?"
"When will I be strong enough to protect jiejie?"
"I don't know." I wish I did. "Sometimes protecting someone is not about how strong you are." I wish I could protect her too. "Sometimes you can't be strong enough to protect someone who doesn't want to be protected."
"Even if you love them?"
"Even if you love them."
Feng Xin's tiny brows furrow in contemplation until his young mind hits a logical dead end. It doesn't make sense to him.
So...
Feng Xin does what he always does when he doesn't know what else to do. "Baba is silly. Of course jiejie wants me to protect her." He hopes.
He prays. Wishes. Believes. Much like the name his mother gave him implies, Feng Xin has faith.
He was born with it. And like any child with a gift from his mother, he'll never let it be taken from him.
Feng Yang tests him. "And how do you know she wants that?"
"She lets me peel her oranges!" Feng Xin looks down and excitedly acts out the motion with his hands.
Yeah, and then she doesn't feed you. It had been beyond difficult for Feng Yang to feel safe leaving Feng Xin in Shen Liang's care. Just the thought of him thinking this way about his daughter made his stomach churn. But recently, even Shen Liang's 'starvation as a form of discipline' was now the least of his concerns.
Oddly, Feng Xin never complained and the treatment went unnnoticed. It took a visit from the royal physician to tell Feng Yang his son was malnourished. Feng Xin never denied that his jiejie sometimes "forgot" to feed him, but he didn't stand for the accusations the physician made about her either. He adamantly refused to cooperate until Feng Yang had asked the man to conclude his visit with the reassurance he'd address his son's care. Stubborn. Just like his mother... Just like his sister too. Feng Xin made his baba promise to never make him see another doctor who talked bad about his jiejie. Feng Yang couldn't deny him.
The feeding was less of an issue now, given the new one (bruises popping up on his skin) but it was best not to bring up Shen Liang's new actions to the little one right now.
So Feng Yang simply says, "But she doesn't share her slices with you."
"I don't need them. I'm strong." He puffs out his chest again and then has the idea to flex his arms like he was heroically nocking an arrow on his toy bow. "Maybe if jiejie eats them, then she can be strong on her own and I don't have to protect her!"
"Maybe. But why do you keep peeling them for her?"
Feng Xin's voice mellows, as sincere as a 3 year old can, but he responds without missing a beat. "I really like peeling oranges for jiejie."
.
Shen Wangxi I don't deserve our son, Feng Yang thinks.
.
...more to come 🤭
#IM SORRY THIS IS SO LONG I DIDNT MEAN IT TO BE#but its so tragic...#I SAY AS IF I DIDNT WRITE THIS AU MYSELF#im evil and i will never apologize for it#fx once heard from sl that an orange calmed him down when he was a baby#so he decides ON HIS OWN to try to peel oranges for his sis whenever she is 'upset' ie: isnt treating him well#he sucks at it at first but he learns... and for some reason sl never really forces him to stop... so he keeps doing it#its the only thing she has left of her mother when they used to peel oranges for each other when it was just the 2 of them#oh and at the start of the dialogue shen liang gets harassed for having foreign blood bc they arent from xianle#but bbie fx has had enough and wants to 'find the boys (not 'men' he is adamant about this part) that hit his jiejie and go and beat em up'#<-his own words#basically i love bby fx#oc shen liang#oc feng yang#oc shen wangxi#fx backstory au
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I need a support group for people whos shitty dads/step dad's transitioned and became perfectly lovely lesbians who like, go to therapy, and try to be nice to you, because my god, I get that this bitch has grown and changed as a person but she's still the reason I get anxious whenever I accidentally shut the door too loudly!
#🙃🙃🙃#It would actually be easier if she still sucked#do you know?#like when I was 8 you screamed at me to lick the cast iron pan if I “really thought it was clean”#do not come into my fucking house and use words like “somatic”#also she basically abandoned my sibling and I when I was 10#and she can not apologize to me in a way that is meaningful for that#so like why even try
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well goddamn he really did fuck that triangle
#livebloggin: book of bill#formal apologies heckin tumblrinos I thought y'all were just doing your usual lmao#been watching through gravity falls for the first time with my niece since she's really into it#between this and adventure time I really gambled and lost picking fucking steven universe as the mandatory spergbinge show of choice#back in the day (because it sucked big time)
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It really hurts when it feels like a friend you considered family gives up on you and the relationship
Like, we could have talked about it, we could have found a solution together, we were each others family remember?! But instead you chose to just give up and cut me out
#and in like#about five messages too!#that were pretty accusatory#like apologizing peofusely bc youre afraid that karma wikl fuck u up for hurting le#doesnt really make up for accusing me of what you did#there are so many more compassionate ways you could have said that!#I'm so so sorry but you suck and i can't take it anymore goodbye#WTF#is this the goodbye seven years of friendship is worth??#we went through thick and thin#and yeah i have not been too well lately and i was pretty depressed two years ago#you asked me to share my problems with you and when i do i am too much and you drop me like hot metal instead of talking about it?#and that goodbye was so rushed it felt like i was chasing her just to get a little closure#you said you would always be there#even with our lives being so different I still believed it was possible#and you kept ignoring me!#i shared good stuff too and you didn't even respond! you said you were too busy and didn't make time for me#so when I stop sharing that good things happen to me too bc I'm frustrated with being ignored all the time you say I'm toxic for only#and drop me? instead of having a talk about it or taking a break?#like#i thought we were each others family but it seems like I was the more loyal one who cared the most and got burned yet again#is it so hard to talk and try to adjust?#i thought we were the real ones for each other yanno but clearly thing were different for you with all your toxic ass family and all your#jobs and friends#she's always had more than me#doesn't mean I'm alone tho#i have friend who can talk to me and try to adjust and fix the relationship and is a true loyal friend#it's not the end of my world that you're gone#even if you were a big part of it#how can I loose when I was so loyal and true and honest
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it’s funny because my mom has this shitty mentality where she thinks because she has been through so much and has chronic pain and health problems that everyone should just be nice to her and do everything she requests. but like. the lady is fine. like absolutely she has been through so much and does indeed struggle with her health and deserves patience and kindness, but like. in reference to me? when i get too stressed my body literally tries to end it all. i will throw up so violently and for so long i can tear my stomach open. but no, i’m the one who should be dancing around her, obviously.
#i have been really sick and i forgot her birthday a few days ago#and please note i have NEVER done that before#and it was because i just never looked at the date!#i just moved into a new apartment#my sister in law visited#and now i am so so so sick#on top of being chronically sick and having all of that flare because of the virus#but of course#my stepfather had to be an asshole about it and get manipulative#so now i am just. afraid#i feel like i can’t talk to them#or not talk to them#i am just frozen#and angry#and filled with guilt over something i truly would never mean to do#and i feel really bad because i love her so much and with the birthdays she’s had in the past it sucks i didn’t say anything#until the next day#i did apologize profusely and send her a sweet message#but it really doesn’t feel like anything is enough for them#it just sucks. i wish he could have just been normal about it.#like oh wow it’s already 8PM on my wife’s birthday but we haven’t heard from our kid#maybe i should check in because she has been SUPER FUCKING BUSY and make sure she messages her mom!#instead of telling me how easy it is to send a text and how hurt and disappointed he was#like. dog. be fucking proactive or be kind#no actually just be fucking kind#it was so fucking frustrating. it’s like he assumed i knew what day it was and i just didn’t care#that is my fucking mom!!!!!#of course i care!!! her birthday was on the 30th and i am still racked with guilt!!!!#and these people gave me a fucking personality disorder!!!#my feelings are complicated and my rage is endless
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im thinking about undertale so i dont have to think about my feelings again
#this might just be me but i really think that undyne should kill asgore#then make out with alphys#also asexual agender autistic papyrus#also if you make human sans skinny youre doing it wrong#also mad mew mew x muffet#enough said on that topic#also they/she chara and they/he frisk#fuck you#transfem she/they asriel while we're at it#also alphys is trans#theyre all trans except for cishet asgore#because if you suck as a person you dont get to be trans or gay#no apologies for that one#also toriel x that bunny lady from snowden#toriel transfem and bunny lady nonbinary#theyre both lesbians#i just personally think i want all of them to be happy#hence Pacifist Ending But Toriel Shoves Asgore Off The Cliff#fuck you asgore#can you tell i hate him yet?#oh you will buddy#if i could go into the undertale world i think i would just bring a gun and shoot asgore#bang bang motherfucker you should just.... explode i think#ramble tag#undertale
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):
#personal#ugh#not a day goes by where i dont think of her /:#we were such good friends /:#and like admittedly i needed to take space after all that i don't regret it#but i h8 that she prematurely apologized b4 even hearing my frustrations or why i was hurt#bc she apologized for what she THOUGHT i wanted to hear#and it sucks /: cause i really hope she's doing better#i hope shes ok#and i miss her#but i cannot bring myself to message her bc like......#i just don't understand how you hear your friends say something shitty happened with someone ur involved with#and blow up at them and demand proof of it#like i dont care how stressed you are with other stuff .......... who does that??????#nvm the fact that like. majority of the stress she had expressed to me then was literally about...... the ppl who did the fucked shit.......#idk. im just sad#she made me feel so seen and held and heard and we were just friends but like..... i cherished her so much ):#ALSO NVM THE FACT THE DAY BEFORE SHE DID THIS I LITERALLY TOLD HER (after talking to her abt smthn separate) tht#the only way we'd stop being friends is if she did LITERALLY exactly what she did#and yeah she sent it to my Wife's DMs#but honestly that makes it worse cause she knew i was there#nd treated my wife after all that like she was an evil meanie while she apologized to me#(which imo idc it reads and transmisogyny)#and she just like. up and left Everything b4 realizing she fucked up#like she did choose this#and im respecting that and respecting myself enough not to try running and begging her to be friends again#i just. idk man. it sucks
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