#but physically totally fine

[fruitless-vain]

Well I can add car crash to the list of things Yoshi has been exposed to

This is not my damn week

Everyone’s fine, we were hit by a car turning left from a lane to the right of us. We just have a dent n some missing grips on the truck’s step but otherwise fine, they smashed the majority of their front end. And they just hit where our back passenger door meets the bed of the truck so not near my passengers, Yo didn’t even flinch, just like “oh that’s a big speed bump”.

Anyways I get to spend the day on the phone with insurance now

[ragsy]

me designing OCs: "okay this one's a monster because she was born that way and doesn't know any other way to be. and this one's a monster because of circumstances out of his control and a lack of skills with which to cope. and this one's a monster because of her blind dedication to an unjust cause. and this one's a monster because she was complacent to a loved one's suffering. and th

[nandermoenthusiast]

im just imagining nandermo in a very enclosed space like for some reason they gotta be chest to chest pushed up against a wall and its awkward for a moment but then nandors eyes are just boring into guillermos and guillermo has that uncertain but unwavering stare too, and is this what is gonna take for them to kiss?

[turning-monday-blue]

Sweets (1/?)

The snugness was barely tolerable. She had overestimated herself. She looked surreptitiously over her shoulder and ducked around a corner. The only thing following her were her bad decisions, but she felt chased all the same.

Okay. Calm down. Breathe (but not too deep). Evaluate the situation. What are your options? Can you loosen anything?

She looked down at herself. Past her swollen breasts, past a fluffy roll of upper belly, she examined her waistline. Nope. The button was the only thing keeping the zipper together, and vice versa. For the millionth time, she lamented her morning. What a bright idea, interviewing for a job with a snack company. She was very well aware of how sweets affected her.

Could she find somewhere discrete to wait out her... little metabolic mishap? She looked around for a discrete nook to accommodate her fresh bulk.

The little atrium she had found had a series of plush benches around the walls. She sighed and headed for the one in the corner. She sucked in as best she could and sat down. Some horny little corner of her mind made note of how it felt as her tight belly shifted against her puffy thighs.

Sitting like this, only barely upright lest bending too far compromise her jeans, she couldn't ignore how her waistband was trying to cut her in half. She thought back to how she had done this to herself. The lovely HR manager had very explicitly pointed out the basket of the company's sugary offerings there in the middle of interview table. The woman had been insistent that she try at least one of each, gushing like any good salesperson about their rich flavors and subtle textures, occasionally even peeling one out of its wrapper and handing it to her.

How could she have done anything but eat what was offered to her? And by a beautiful woman, no less. She knew how her body reacted to food like this, but she had been desperate to make a good impression, to look good and eager and employable. A good girl. She ignored that last thought, and the accompanying shiver through her frazzled tummy.

She closed her eyes and tried to steady herself. Breathe in through the nose and out through the mouth (but not too deeply). All she had to do was calm down, and give her body a chance to do the same. Then she could find a back door to sneak out of, go home and hope that somehow that she hadn't blown the interview.

She opened her eyes again and caught sight of herself in a mirror across the room. Holy crap, she was huge. She had been her normal, narrow self, and her outfit had fit very very normally, when she had arrived. But now? Now it looked positively painted onto her. Her breasts were trying to spill out of her tastefully exposed bra and over the lapel of her blouse. She was more balloon than woman at this point. She ignored another tingle.

As she watched herself in the mirror, she noticed something change. Slowly but surely, the last wrinkle in her blouse smoothed out. Uh oh. That meant... she was still filling out. Panic. She tingled again.

No. No. Calm. Breathe (but not too deep). She closed her eyes again, and could feel her plump body quietly grow. Crap.

Panic. Calm. Breathe (but not too deep). Calm.

Maybe if she didn't look, it would go away. That had never worked before, sure, but there's a first time for everything, right?

As she rationalized to herself, she noticed the sound of heels clacking towards her hiding spot. Panic!

Maybe their owner would pass and not notice her?

No such luck.

The woman who had interviewed her rounded the corner.

"There you are!"

She struggled to stand. So tight.

"You left your purse upstairs. I get it, though. Interviews can be pretty stressful, huh?"

Like nothing had changed. Did this woman not notice that she was currently three times the size she was when she had shown up? Could this woman not hear every seam in her clothes creaking in harmony? Could the woman not see how wide and deep and round she was becoming?

"It's such a beautiful handbag, I almost wanted to keep it for myself!" The woman laughed. "Oh well."

She took the bag from the woman. "O-oh! Thank you!" Leapt out of her.

"Listen," said the woman, "technically I have to review a few other candidates, but I think you're a shoo-in for the position." The woman moved closer. "No one else has shown so much... enthusiasm." Closer still. She basked in the smell of the woman's musky perfume.

"Oh... that's great!" she managed to squeak out.

"In fact," the woman continued, "if you'd like to come back upstairs, we can have you fill out the onboarding paperwork now, so you don't have to come back just to fill out some forms if... when we give you the job." So close now.

"Um! Okay!" What.

The woman placed a gentle hand on the side of her massive, tight, growing belly. "Listen, between you and me, that passion you showed today will take you far with us. Do you feel like the offer is fair? We can negotiate further if you need." The woman's eyes were so sincere.

What was going on here? She could barely think.

The woman placed her other hand on top of her belly, well hidden by her burgeoning breasts. "I do hope you'll say yes."

"Um..."

There was a pop. Her button pinged away across the room from her overburdened jeans. It made a little thwack sound as it hit the far wall. Her zipper flew down, zizzing audibly. Her belly erupted through the breach. Her blouse retreated upwards. The tingling became a roar. All the while, the woman, as though no tectonic shifts were happening right there and then, continued to implore with borderline puppydog eyes.

The world held its breath with her. How had this woman not reacted to any of that?! What? Was the woman still waiting for an answer?

"...okay?" She tried. She wasn't sure if her brain was still working. "Sure?" Best to stick to small sentences.

"Yay!" cheered the woman, "I really think you'll love it here!" The woman launched in for a quick hug around her exposed belly. The woman's arms didn't go even halfway around her. And still the woman didn't seem to notice that anything was wrong.

"Well! If you'll follow me back to the elevators, we can at least get the formalities out of the way."

The woman took her by the hand and pulled, still gentle. She followed, mutely. Even the horniest, shamiest corners of her mind were silent, waiting with bated breath.

As they reached the elevators, the woman pushed the up button and stood to the side. "Please," said the woman, "after you!"

On autopilot now, she stepped into the elevator and... wedged into the door. Stuck. What. Panic? Calm? The elevator dinged again as if to say "I'm waiting!"

The cold of the elevator doors brought her back to reality. She put a hand on either side of herself and tried to pull herself in. As though this were somehow normal, the woman chirped "Oh, here, let me help!"

She felt a gentle pair of hands press into her oceanic bottom. Her horny brain thrilled again. She clamped down on those thoughts. No time to be a pervert.

Between the two of them, they muscled her into the elevator. She turned to face the doors in time to watch the woman press into her in order to let the doors close. Normally equipped for eight full-sized human adults, due to her immensity, it very barely fit two.

"We need floor thirty," said the woman into her barely contained cleavage. She tried to reach for the panel of buttons, but by now there was simply too much of her in the way.

"I've got it," said the woman, reaching behind her without looking.

They rode the thirty floors quietly. She could feel herself still widening, pressing towards the walls of the elevator car. Her embarrassment had burnt out, leaving only a kind of stunned peace in her mind. She tried to will her body away from the woman, but where else could it really go?

By the time they reached their destination, the woman was firmly pressed against the doors, still showing no indication of the extra-ordinariness of the situation.

As the doors opened, the woman stepped back, grabbed her hands, and pulled as she tried to wiggle through the door. Eventually she floomped through, and they set off toward the HR suite.

Full-on waddling now, she felt an inner tension release. She had stopped growing. Relief. If nothing else, at least things had stopped getting worse. Sure, she was almost round enough to roll. Tingle. Sure, her clothing had been reduced to barely covering her... rude areas. Tingle. Sure, a beautiful woman was acting as though this was all perfectly normal. Tingle tingle tingle. But hey, at least it finally wasn't getting worse.

The woman pushed open the double doors to the HR suite and welcomed her in with another glittering smile. They seemed to be the only ones there. The woman led her, patiently, to the front desk area. The woman ducked behind the desk, looking for something.

"Hmm, it looks like I'll need to go print off more some more copies of the forms. Shouldn't take more than a minute or two." Finally she'd have a moment to collect herself.

Then the woman produced a basket, laden with various goodies, from underneath the desk. "Here! Help yourself, sorry to make you wait." Uh.

"Oh, here, allow me," said the woman, picking out a chocolate confection, peeling it, and pressing it into her mouth. "I'll be right back!"

She chewed and swallowed the treat.

Uh oh.

[prolibytherium]

Man those The Hobbit movies really were bad huh

[lloydfrontera]

a list of crimes bk moon has committed against me personally with the sequel in no particular order but you will Know which ones i feel more strongly about anyway:

javier smiling to himself and getting all nostalgic as he watches rakiel because he reminds him so very much of lloyd

like seriously this man cannot stop comparing the two of them and getting quietly happy because it brings back fond memories it is heartbreaking he literally has to remind himself to not get swept in sentimentality several times every time he talks with rakiel

and as if that wasn't enough damian and rakiel remind him so much of himself and lloyd that he ends up offering to help them without even thinking about it. like. he feels so identified with them, remembering how hard it had been for him and lloyd to go through that whole ordeal on their own that he just. tells them they have his support before he even realized what he's doing. he wasn't planning on doing that. good work on not getting sentimental babe.

when lloyd and javier are on a call planning how to defeat the demon king, despite the awful circumstances javier can't help but smile and then laugh at himself because no matter how terrible the situation is he still finds it enjoyable to prepare for something with lloyd like they used to do. "it was a feeling similar to a distant longing. or a joy that felt like going back to the past"

javier is pining so hard. like. it's insane.

AND HE JUST KEEPS SMILING SOFTLY WHENEVER HE GETS CONFIRMATION THAT LLOYD STILL HASN'T CHANGED HE'S STILL THE SAME PERSON JAVIER SPENT HIS LIFE WITH SOMEONE SEDATE ME

anyway

lloyd asking rakiel about javier. asking how he's doing. acting all nonchalant about it even kind of annoyed. and then once he's alone. sighing and then smiling faintly. "like the smile he used to smile at someone"

"'so you're doing well? i'm glad' a feeling that blooms for a moment. a memory that's suddenly missed."

i am. going to fucking explode.

and then. there's their actual face-to-face conversation. which. oh my god. i don't even know what to start with.

javier always saying "it's been a while lloyd-nim" no matter how long it has been since they last talked?? because any time at all is too long???

lloyd saying that if anyone hears him say that they'll think they're gyeonwoo and jiknyeo. y'know. the mythical forbidden lovers that live in different realms and can only meet when the stars align so to speak.

y'know. just casually comparing your protagonists to one of the most romantic and tragic couples in mythology. no biggie.

and again. javier smiling when he sees that lloyd is still just the way he was when they were together. hello. hi. can i help you.

lloyd knowing exactly how long it's been since they saw each other in person. down to the very day. "107 years, 7 months and 17 days".

javier getting really, really, really happy about it. about lloyd still being the same. and thinking that, maybe, lloyd feels the same way deep down.

lloyd being so very, very casual about saying "it's been a while so i'm glad to see you" very specifically calling back to the very thing javier says to him whenever they talk.

and then. and then javier. thinking as he sees lloyd leave. that it was really nice to meet him after so long. and that the sight of him leaving still felt the same as it did before. and wondering if those gyeonwoo and jiknyeo lloyd mentioned before felt like this too.

javier. comparing what he feels at seeing lloyd leave. to what the cowherd and the weaver girl felt at separating again.

bk moon i am crawling on your ceiling

anyway if this novel doesn't end with the barriers between hell and heaven falling apart so lloyd and javier can spend the rest of eternity together instead of helplessly pinning over the other and reminiscing over the lifetime they already spent together i will throw someone off a bridge <3

[treacherous]

Got into my first car accident today if people can send me good vibes that it'll mostly be covered by insurance 💗

[tacticaltaxonomist]

Chapters: 1/3 Fandom: Call of Duty (Video Games) Relationships: John "Soap" MacTavish/Simon "Ghost" Riley Additional Tags: Possession, haunted objects, Spirit Gun, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Blood Magic

[Immediate sequel to: Faded Flesh by Nouna, it's so good, read that first!] "Do as ever you will... If that's how it works, I release you. Find some peace for me, too, maybe..." These had been Ghost's last words to the rifle he'd found, tried to bring home. His last words to Soap, but Soap isn't going to give up that easy. - It's one part muscle memory and three parts marionetting, Soap decides as he pulls them up onto their feet, rifle in hands.

With Simon's permission he can still work, use Simon's body when Simon cannot.

He refuses for this to be their end.

[bluecatwriter]

I haven't actually been keeping up with Dracula Daily this year, even though I really wanted to. I know exactly why: last year around this time, I went through a pretty horrible personal loss, and I associate that point in my life very strongly with reading the emails and especially listening to Re: Dracula. Lucy's arc in particular just... parallels some things about my own experience in ways that I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with right now.

I think that maybe I'll listen to the whole months of August and September in one go, on a long walk on a nice day, when I feel emotionally ready to handle ugly-crying for like two hours straight. I think it might be cathartic.

[aachria]

Happy birthday!!! I hope you have had a wonderful day surrounded by good food and good friends

The way I only saw my sister and mom today and spent nearly all of it in my room and only ate mediocre food 😭 bro why was my birthday PATHETIC??? I mean I had a good time because I'm a Huge Fucking Introvert but still

ANYWAY THANK YOU!!!

[unreconstructedfangirl]

This business about Imane Khelif, the cisgender woman Olympic boxer who is currently being slandered by She Who Must Not Be Named and a whole host of other assholes on the internet really chaps my ass because get this: my actual irl husband, who was amab and is cisgender, has chormosonal differences and his body produces no natural testosterone whatsoever--what testosterone he has, he gets via HRT at the doctor's office. You can bet your last fucking nickel that those same people would insist (rightly) that he is a man despite all that, and would be equally incensed if he were in that ring, and let me tell you this: either of those female Olympic boxers could easily take him out in less than 46 seconds. Because yeah. He's not tough.

Bodies are all different, dumbasses. LET PEOPLE LIVE!

[epickiya722]

I have to mentally prepare myself for tomorrow's episode because of these two damn images!

I already know I'm gonna have a crisis, I am not going to be okay, I'm going to be in my feelings when I see all of what's going to happen be animated!

[foolbo]

i love when comics acknowledge the physical effects of superheroing

[phagodyke]

the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

[kirby-the-gorb]

[thelostgirl21]

Help him...