#but one would absolutely be enough to cause a mass freak out

[harbingerofsoup]

honestly with the way us devil’s minion enjoyers have been whipping ourselves into a frenzy persistently over the last several months i think even a single crumb of them in season 3 will have the equivalent effect of being shot through the eye by a sniper rifle

[archtroop]

Sometimes I need to remind myself that tumblr is a fringe social network, and is by far not the average. What it is though, is a good sampler of the more extreme, I would say, ideologically swayed. A bit.

The more comments and notes I read from the Free Palestine crowd, the more it gets obvious that these are incapable, useful idiots. Literally, spoonfed couchpotatos at best. Starbucks Boycoyters at worst.

It's like the 00's insecure attention seeking posers, with an amoral, ignorant twist to them.

And they are entirely, ABSOLUTELY useless people.

Some morally rotten such individual wrote me that "Israel deserves what's coming for them, you deserve to die" etc. And it really made me think. What's coming? WHO'S coming? You? You, an unemployed tumblrina? You and what army?

What are you gonna do? Try to kill us all? What's the WORST you can do that wasn't, hasn't been tried already?

Truth is, no one is coming.

You read about this pompous, self indulgent "Palestinian Activism Solidarity ". What the FUCK are you talking about? Where is it? What, SA under IRI at the ICJ?.... Watermelon emojis...? ...Slogans?

The most "affective" actions FreePalestine Movement "achieved" was a few shootings/stabbings/rammings here and there, a hostage situation in Turkey in the name of Palestine (the man was executed on the spot after some negotiations. Turkey, yeah). A few burnt synagogues around the world and a whole lot of terrorized Jews in the Diaspora. Not a single Palestinian benefited. Not in Gaza anyway. To sum it up, what exactly are you gonna do? Blow yourself up in a subway in the name of Palestine? How incredibly unoriginal and unhelpful. Although expected and unsurprisingly fitting to the roots of the movement, I'll give you all that.

No one is coming. A lot of pakapaka from Nassrallah and Co. and a radio silence from the Arab world.

Iran pulled the Houthies out of their boydem only for Egypt, Saudi Arabia, and Jordan to reluctantly push the button to down Houthie ammo flying towards Israel. Houthies "asked" of Saudi Arabia to "let them cross over to fight the Zionists", and not only this is a joke, a caravan of sandals-wearing, AK-47 totting, Houthie caravan crossing Saudia to do what exactly? Bite Israeli ankles in Eilat Port? Rather It's an insult, to show that "here see we tried", since Saudis are fighting the Houthies FOR YEARS, it was never an actual option to begin with.

Are you blind? No. One. Is. Coming.

After 75 years of trying to erase Israel from the map, the 7th of October unleashed what could only have happened after Israel had its last straw broken.

Congratulations, you've managed at dehumanizing Israelis to the point that you managed to rob us from one aspect of humanity, even if temporarily: our symphaty.

Not forever, but for a period. And when you did so, you WERE LUCKY, for US were here WITHIN MINUTES, being smart enough to talk Israel out from attacking on the freaking spot. Instead, Israel waited 3 damn weeks. For 3 weeks, Israel called for the evacuation of Gazans from the northern side of Gaza.

Symphaty has an expiration date. The 7th of October 2023 was that date. You backed Israel to a wall, and no slogan will suffice against a nation that KNOWS that its very existence was threatened in a very real, visceral, inhumane, and depraved way.

No one is coming. Not for us, not for the Gazans. The Arab world is waiting to see, when will they wake up with one Iranian proxy less on the map. The truth is, aside from the pakapaka all round the clock, Isrsel was left with "do what you do, we wait" kind of global attitude.

Arab nations don't care about Palestinians. They don't care for the Palestinian Cause. Never had. It was always for show, as a pawn. A distraction. And we know it, very well.

The Palestinians are, and always were, used. They were used to carry on this idea that Israel would disappear from the map. If not by force, then by proxy warfare and terrorism, with time. If not by proxies, then by mass protest and public opinion. But the thing is, reality is a material thing. You need TO DO a thing for it TO HAPPEN. And public opinion rarely holds. And for how it's loud, the Free Palestine Movement is nothing but that: Loud.

As for the undoing of Israel and Bney Israel, well. Many have tried.

And oh boy, did the Arab nations TRIED.

They PAYED for trying.

But that's in the past, largely. Now, the annihilation of Israel and the creation of a Palestine is just a cruel pipe dream, with human prisoners, and an international cheering squad. After all, you can't free something that never existed and couldn't form one coherent ideology that makes sense and strives towards a positive, creation-adjacent activity in 75 years of its yappery. It's just not there. If the ideology surrounds destruction, it can not create. It can only destroy.

You may shout your lungs out and make up all kinds of delusional narratives. In the end, they are just that: empty words to make the righteous self of the woke crowd feel better, to feel active. To be a part.

To be USED.

It says a lot about the sad reality of this mass of people. The yearning for purpose, this loneliness. The rootlessness. Loss of identity. Identities so fractured, so incohesive. Loss of trust in the institution. The shallow knowledge. The practically non-existent reading comprehension.

All are easily diverted to create this cult like behavior.

People cry their eyes out over something that not only they have zero way of affecting but oftentimes is inflated, twisted, and presented as something completely false, or fake or what have you, instead of looking around them and doing something about their own realities. Pouring their hearts out over an unreality, fruitless.

This is either willful ignorance or escapism. Can't even say which one is worse.

This mass is being used. It creates a pool of despair, mysery. Feelings of "not enough", of unachievment. Those masses are breeding grounds for terrorism activity recruitment.

One party, one goal.

Free Palestine is a magic combination of words. You would ask, what is it? And they would sell you, ah, it's this magical place over the rainbow far, far away, and you can be the savior of those people. What a beautiful fantasy. Except you can't save those who did all their best to commit a slow, painstaking suicide, over 75 years. It's unrealistic, whatever this so-called "movement" is yapping about. There are no outlines, no strategy. It's just empty, big, bombastic words, to rile up emotionally as many people as possible, who look for a meaning.

I keep remembering the movie The Wave (2008). It's amazing how word by word, scene by scene, the story is playing out right now with worrying accuracy.

I don't know where this will lead Europe, UK, US, Canada... Australia... you all should be on high alert internally. But one thing is pretty clear.

No one is coming. As for Israel... You did your worst already. You have left Israel with nothing to be afraid of.

BDS biggest achievement was the eventual unemployment of thousands of Palestinians from the West Bank. UN is a joke. Red Cross is a joke. UNRWA exposed, visibly and undeniably. Abraham Accords are proceeding, even if slower, yet still they do. HAMAS gets mopped the floor with. And Lebanon has to do the impossible: drag Hezbollah away from the Isrseli border. Otherwise, there won't be much of a Lebanon to speak about in a very short amount of time. And that's not even a threat. It's reality. As government officials in Lebanon plead with Hezbollah to halt, Israel is ready on the border for 80,000 Israelis are internally displaced within Isrsel itself because of the war with HAMAS, but mainly away from the northern border because of constant shelling by Hezbollah.

And it won't hold forever.

And no one is coming.

Because who will? You and what army?

[miniimapp]

Jesse - You Boys Are the (Homosexual) Supporting Cast

Gen;; Fluff - Headcanons

Warnings ;; no ?? i mean,, stress and anger (from reader pov) but not really ??

Proofread + Edited ;; a little bit actually,, mainly when going through and adding the bold and the blue and the italics lmao

Auth. Note ;; bet y'all thought i died.. nah i ain't never leaving i'm just clumsy af and smashed my phone into smithereens,, prolly got y'all tho lmaoooo

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

Jesse is an insufferable flirt

Which would be fine if you didn't have shit to do

But you do !!

Accepting the roles of stage manager as well as assistant director was the worst choice you could have ever made

So help the world if you ever get your hands on a time machine

The school production may fall apart but at least your mental health would still be somewhat intact

But for now you're stuck with mountains of responsibilities and a sweet fucking annoying distraction

Speaking of said distraction

Jesse plays the lead's best friend and also an asshole who won't let you get on with your work

So he has his fair share of time on stage

But even then, you can barely catch a break

As soon as he steps foot into the wings he somehow immediately finds you

It honestly baffles you how differently Jesse acts in and out of class

Okay but on a real note you can't be at all angry at Jesse

Not when he's being so sweet and charming

Even though he keeps getting in your way

At one point, when the director was sick so you had to take that over whilst being stage manager and assistant director as well you had snapped at Jesse

He hadn't even been flirting with you at that point

Mans was literally just in the vicinity

Apparently that was enough of a crime to warrant your wrath

You absolutely still cringe thinking about that day

You hadn't shouted or anything

No, no you'd angrily whispered

And because you were stressed and upset your voice jumped like 5 octaves

Okay maybe not but it felt that way

You were giving mickey mouse realness

Which we love :D

It just wasn't the time

It's never the time for mickey mouse realness in today's society smh

You were on the verge of tears and mass murder which is always a good combination

(why are you always breaking down around this man fr)

Jesse had stared at you wide-eyed as you shat out a monologue of stress and misplaced anger

And once you were finished, chest heaving and feeling lighter than you had in a while, Jesse sends you an encouraging smile

"Sorry, sweetheart, I never meant to offend ya. Honestly, I was kinda hoping I was breaking up your stress, that's where I was coming from anyway. Still, I only caused you grief, not very fair of me, I'll admit."

You sniffed, awkwardly laughing things off and rubbing at your face

"Sorry for snapping at you. God, why is it whenever we talk I'm always freaking out."

Jesse laughs, a cheeky grin lighting up his face

"It's so I can rescue you from the depths of your despair, like your very own knight in shining armour."

Your roll your eyes good-naturedly, your own smile making it's way onto your face

"Oh, my hero!"

You pretend to swoon and Jesse's smile widens

You give yourself a second to take a breath, realising that, as bad as it seems afterwards, you really needed this

"Thank for, um, listening I guess. I didn't realise how much I needed to get off my chest until I was throwing it at you so I'm sorry but thank you."

Jesse gives a small nod and smile

"Anytime...well, maybe not any but you get what I mean."

After getting over that bump in the road the two of you get on like a house on fire

And you quickly come to appreciate the break in routine that Jesse gives you

You never quite realise how much the stress is getting to you until Jesse drags you away from your scripts and into something else

Something fun

As you two become closer you notice that he's started becoming more.. touchy

Like brushing stray hairs out of you face

Or tapping the tip of your nose

Or giving you a side hug before going on stage

Or leaning up against you to read over your notes

Things like that

And at first you thought they were innocent, unconscious actions

Until of course he started winking at you as he walked on stage

Or smirking at you after smoothing down a stray hair

Or making stupid comments as he moves away

Jesse is absolutely fucking with you

This absolute bitch

You're about to pull up fr

And his flirting continues throughout the whole rehearsal period

And you love it

It gives you happy butterflies in your chest and stomach

It's bearable you suppose...

But his secret winks and smiles directed only at you do get you thinking a little bit

You've never really watched the rehearsals properly

Probably not a good thing to be realising now, seeing as you have such important roles

Oh well, you haven't ruined the show yet

Everything will probably be just fine

Obviously you'd directed and checked for cues when leading everyone backstage but you'd never just watched it

So as the rehearsals left before opening night dwindle to only a few you decide you'll just watch for once

And somehow you've never noticed that Jesse's character has a love interest

Not a problem

You have zero problems

Next question

Okay shut up

It does slightly grind on your nerves watching their confession scene

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

It's fine.

No worries.

You can handle this.

But it certainly doesn't help that Jesse keeps making eye contact with you when saying his lines

Like,, bro

The director in you wants to scream

He's meant to be confessing to his love interest, not you !!

Make eye contact with the love interest !!

But the rest of you ??

Simply ascending every time Jesse confesses while gazing into your eyes

The dreamy asshole

Not so subtly glad he's looking at you and not at them

It's getting kinda hard to distinguish between reality and fiction

And the heat in your cheeks won't disappear regardless so that's great

Your only saving grace is that Jesse doesn't keep his eyes on you throughout the whole scene

But every time without fail, just before the scene ends, Jesse searches for your gaze and holds it, uttering his character's final line

"My love, for you I would do anything."

[paradoxcase]

@wellhappybirthdaytomeiguess:

A couple things: Pash and Cam/Pal eliminated all the Merv Wing folks, so this is We Suffers branch. The security measures they put in place I think assumed ‘Sweet Simple Nona’ and not ‘Eldritch Monster Nona.’

I mean, I feel like they were expecting her to be an eldritch monster since they were still shooting her? Well, someone at some point said to disengage, but that was after they all lined up outside the room to shoot at her

There is definite debate over who is saying ‘Fool. You’re killing her.’ In this instance, I personally think the ‘her’ is Harrow (her body) and I think it’s said by some piece of Gideon still in there to the overarching Nona. But I am probably massively wrong.

Well, it makes me feel better that that question is never actually answered in the book, since I don't have any better idea, either

I think you are spot on about Nona’s tantrum reminds Pyrrha of. And if the body horror of the opening part of this chapter is any indication…oh my.

Yeah, back in Harrow the Ninth I wasn't sure what the Lyctors meant about Alecto being monstrous since by all accounts she seemed to have a regular human body and they seemed to think she was a regular human. But if she sometimes treated her body the way Nona treats her body here, I can see them saying that

‘Remembering her teeth’ simply means she’s about to start tearing flesh with them pretty soon, I think!

Oh, like since she's feeling like her body is foreign to her right now, she's only sometimes remembering what body parts she has that she can use to express her anger?

At its core, most folks think the cause of this third tantrum was Nona being chained/tied/zipped/locked up. And there are definitely a couple of characters who might reasonably be enraged about waking up tied to a chair or bed in a locked room. Interesting too that Nona holding the chair leg is described as holding it as if it were a broadsword if I recall correctly.

Hmm, it says she brandished it "like a sword", but I don't know if that's enough to indicate Gideon? I think Nona has said that she's familiar with Camilla's swords, right?

And yeah, I mean, I would probably freak out too, if someone ziptied me to some chairs. I can see why BOE maybe thought that was a smart idea since they tie them up when bringing them to the facility, too, but still.

@eye-lantern:

For the strength thing, to me it's like neural adaptation and hysteric strength. Our mind muscle connexion has a set strain that it can inflict on muscles and tendons to avoid us injuring ourselves. Powerlifters and athletes train to add muscle mass but also to make this limit adapt closer to their max strength, but it mostly stays below permanent damage. Some lifters clean break their tendons, tear muscle fibers by going to hard. After Eddy Hall lifted 500 p he fainted and had to be hospitalized. During that one biggest effort they deploy strength way beyond what a non lifter can exert per kg of muscle. Nona can go further, and absolutely destroy her body to create impossible proportional strength. Hitting a door with all you strength would do little because you hit under the strength you will shatter your bones at, but Nona's hits would render her unable to move. Because she has no instinct of preserving her own body.

Thanks, that's interesting! And Nona destroying her body this way still doesn't stop her because she has the Lyctor healing ability, so as long as she doesn't damage herself faster than her body can heal she can just keep going

@wellhappybirthdaytomeiguess:

yeah, I feel like we are really seeing a sort of mental breakdown of John here, at least a bit. Cassieopia was so right. You can save the world, or you can have revenge. You can't do both. John says he wants both, but I personally think he was so so so angry about the trillionaires that he couldn't think straight.

Yeah, it's making more and more sense that John is Gen Z - I feel like so many younger online spaces are sort of focused on people being angry and less on like, what can we do to help. Maybe that's just how it is when you're younger, but I don't remember being that angry when I was a teenager? And like, we had stuff to be angry about, that was back when Dubya was in office and doing the "War on Terror" because of the "WMDs" that turned out not to actually exist and so forth. But I feel like I see more irrational anger like this in some places now

[lilitophidian]

If only she cared.

But why couldn't her little one or beloved husband answer the door instead? The amusement of having them kiss at her Louboutin red-bottomed heels pleads in her sudden return. A kiss or two to the sculpted cheeks of perfection as the queen she was, loved by the masses as she waved a hand in her excellency. Oh, she could envision such while the scent of certain entities released piss in their pants upon her presence.

Thankfully, Chanel No. 5 was enough to empower such odors even if she took delight in the terror she so sweetly caused.

Chaos was as delicious as carmine on the tip of the tongue with its iron tones.

He wouldn't D A R E strike her if he didn't want his dearest niece and brother to banish him. Their love was her protection, and it would never wavier as long as she dawned the crown of Hell with her blackened heart. He stood no chance in the manner, and even so, it wasn't like they'd listen.

Only assume he was starting shit again and against a dreamer of a woman.

Thinned, well-kept, eyebrow kept raised as she gave him judgment with her snaked eyes.

Fucking angels. Always in business matters that DID NOT CONCERN THEM. If he wasn't here to collapse the empire of pearly gates he was deemed useless. Absolutely fucking useless and perhaps a foil in the plans, but maybe she could do away with him somehow in a freak accident to keep her dainty claws clean.

Though, she wouldn't mind a taste of golden liquid pumping through his veins and drenching her fangs as she went straight for the fucking jugular. Ah, such thoughts are hidden behind graceful reigning guise.

A gentle push passed him as she slowly took the glasses off of her nose, looking around at what her daughter created in interest. How she was proud she could be such an inspiration regarding the matter. Good job, little moon snake. You've made Mama proud even if it was one step far from many.

" Hm. I'm sure the mess will be taken care of... I did teach my little one to keep things organized. She always placed her toys back when she was finished playing with them...Can't say the same for Lucifer... But I do understand. "

She mumbled off, trying to play the role of an innocent mother and wife. Her fingers of the free hand graced a few of the objects in thought as Michael assumed he could speak to her in such a way.

Darting her glowing eyes over, she gave him a narrowed expression before it loosened with a smile. It lit up the room as the lights on the wall flicked with her in tune. The frame once in hand disappeared as if she never had them in the first place.

" I was taking care of things to better the future of the kingdom. I suppose you wouldn't be aware of such things. Nor motherhood, being a wife....I'll forgive you for that just this once as womanhood is a very complicated thing that masculinity could never fully comprehend. "

Passive way to say, it's none of your business and I think you're a fucking stupid man with a pea-sized brain.

" How intriguing in words that you speak. Considering the last time we saw you. I suppose you're lucky I raised Charlie such as I did, and I do so hope... You keep to your word even if the all-mighty father disagrees. But it seems to me.. " Peering down at her talons to look over the manicured job, she softly spoke. Most would say her voice was like a beautiful siren song luring unsuspecting sailors to the deep blue graves.

" He may have turned his back on many. Such as he did with Lucifer and all those years ago. No matter, just keep in line. I'd hate for any coup d'etat to break out. I trust you won't disappoint? "

[pocketramblr]

For the ask game: 5 headcanons about how the OFA Stockpiles Beauty AU would cause the World Heroes Mission movie to go differently. Thank you!

I haven't seen the third movie so this was pieced together from the wiki and @gentrychild 's help.

1- So Izuku’s doing his own thing, trying to make sure totally-not-a-theif-Rody is fine after the brief case chase, when the Humanrise Police try to take the case from Rody. Izuku tries to difuse, and with one last glance back and a sigh, Rody runs. But here, Izuku’s attempts are rather distracting, and the Humanrise are hesitant to follow the shoot to kill order while looking at him. Turn or Beros or whoever gave the order isn’t happy to have arguments, and order to still chase Rody. Some Humanrise try to split from Izuku to go after him, but Izuku keeps putting himself in the way before he gets annoyed enough to just leave and try to follow Rody.

2- Flect or Beros or whoever’s calling the orders puts in the cue for the media to play the “False accusations of a mass murdered” card. Once again, they’re questioned, but snap that they don’t care who it is, just do it. They will later regret not even asking for a picture of this random annoying hero they’re framing, because as soon as it airs everyone is freaking out about how someone is Framing Midoriya Izuku For Murder- perhaps a shapeshifting villain? a hacker? a jealous ex?? a spurned stalker?? They have to help him! and catch the actual muderer, what if they decide to kill Izuku when he’s seperated from the others??

3- Lukily for Izuku, Pino is as smitten with him as Rody, so she helps him find Rody even with his headstart, and they get out of dodge. Rody agrees with Izuku’s plan to head to the border and get out of jurisdiction. (is the neighboring country non-extradiction????) Fortunately it is way easier for them because they don’t have to hide from everyone- just stay to smaller roads and towns, knock on doors and ask if there’s spare room or leftovers, and most are charmed at the sight of Izuku and agree, not reporting it. Clearly Izuku’s horrible murderous stalker ex was jealous of the beautiful boy and his new boyfriend! Rody gets multiple shovel talks from strangers every day, but they’re safe.

Well. There’s another reason they’re safe: Every time a Humanrise Cop or Villain finds them, they end up joining them. Clearly Flect Turn is wrong if a guy with this face is decrying their stance on quirks while also being hotly defensive of the quirkless population, who would, you know, absolutely not love to live in a grieving post apoclyptic world even if the current dystopic one isn’t great.

So its Izuku, and Rody, and their growing gang of ex-Humanrise protection. The civilians offering them rooms and food assume that’s the protective custody Izuku’s got to keep them safe while the Crazy Jealous Stalker Ex Maybe Murderer Who Framed Him is found. No assumptions are corrected.

4- They get to the border way sooner, and there’s a smaller force there to stop them. The ex-Humanrise take it while a non-injured Izuku and Rody get over. They are safe, find the message and the key, and Rody confesses two things: one, he was tempted to turn it over to protect his siblings, and two, he’s in love with izuku and that’s why he didn’t. Izuku ignores that second part because that’s what everyone thinks. Shoto casually confesses his love too, knowing Izuku always brushes it off. Katsuki grumbles. He’s so tired. 

Izuku focuses on the first part, suggesting they go back asap to make sure his siblings are safe. They get back much faster and sneaker than they left, and confirm the kids are fine, actually moving them to protective custody. 

While at the house though, they find a clue of some kind that helps them realize what the suitcase and key was for, and realize about the bombs and kill switch.

They start looking for the bombs, alerting the heroes.

5- At the heroes altert, Flect Turn realizes they’ve got the key, but is sure they’re too far away to use it because he doesn’t realize they’re back inside the border. He announces the two hour to the end of the world thing, and is very embarrassed when Izuku and Rody neutralize the bombs twenty minutes later because how much of a head start they got. the day is saved. Rody does not get a kiss but Pino gets some coos and soft pets and almost dies of happiness. 

+1- The way Shoto confessed his love was this btw: Shoto: of course no one would have thought you were a murderer. Rody: yeah, can’t believe they’d think we were criminals Shoto: nope, i said not murderer. He’s definitely a thief though. Katsuki: no Rody: Uh, just to clarify- of the two of us, he’s the one who looks like a thief? Shoto: of course. Katsuki: don’t you dare. Shoto: After all, he stole my heart Katsuki: i’m going to kill you one day. Izuku: can we go back to the children in danger part. I’m all for going back to help them! Katsuki: if you don’t, there will be more dead children here in a second.

[arinavah]

i would love to hear more headcanons you have about chosoyuki after everything has been settled, what do they do? how will their relationship change as they settle themselves into normalcy? Would they travel the world together? what are their favourite mundane activities to do together BASICALLY DOMESTIC AU

Okaaaaay, welcome to my TED talk. Well, of course everything depends on what we define as "everything is settled". Honestly, I genuinely think that at the end of jjk manga they’ll find the way to get rid of cursed energy and curses, and my headcanon is that THIS IS how Choso will die (as he is a half-curse), but we ignore angst headcanons, we are here to talk about fluffy, unrealistic, absolutely random (and tbh not really domestic) ones. ARE YOU READY?? 1.3k (wtf) words text + illustrations under the cut:

I don’t know if you can see that from the way I draw chosoyuki, but I don’t headcanon them to be deeply in love or something like this, I think of them more like of friends with benefits (whose “friendship” might have gone too far after some time spent together). So, after everything is settled they can just as likely separate and forget about each other or end up growing closer to one another, catch up some feeLiNgS and continue whatever is happening between them.

Anyway, I think Yuki’s scientific curiosity is in ecstasy from meeting infamous death painting, she bombards him with questions about everything: about his abilities, his brothers, his memories, his body. Not everyday you meet someone you read about in history textbooks! I can imagine her suggesting him to do some experiments on him, but he freaks out - he doesn’t want to be an object for experiments anymore. “Toji, Choso……all men I’m interested in always turn me down” :_( 

Yuki is most likely teaching Choso fighting or some jujutsu tricks as we speak. (Maybe Gege will finally show us them in the next part of the arc?)

Yuki: “nature was cruel enough to make me bisexual so I’m attracted to mEn, and my standards have fallen even lower so now I’m attracted to the (half)curse?? it’s probably because of adrenaline rush caused by oncoming end of the world...”

I don’t think Choso is totally unaware about how modern world works, I headcanon that he has some vague memories and some automatic skills left from the previous owner of his body(“wow, I can ride a bicycle?”), but some skills become completely forgotten - so he has difficulties reading and writing, doesn’t understand technologies, and obviously doesn’t know a shit about mass culture. Teaching him how to write a text message is like teaching your grandparents (everybody has this experience, right?? it's hard!)

Choso has never held money in his hands, and moreover never earned them himself, so Yuki is kinda sponsoring him at first (sugar mommy, ha).

The question “what do they do?” is interesting, because it depends on whether they got rid of curses or not. If not, I guess Choso could start working on jjk society (well, on its updated version with new higher ups, I’m sure old ones would just exorcize him), kill curses and stuff like that. But if they find a way to get rid of curses and sorcerers are not needed anymore, I bet all sorcerers will have some identity crisis: they lost their job, the meaning of the whole life, they don’t have skills for other jobs, and WHAT jobs? What do they want to do in their life? WHO THEY ARE without their sorcery work?

OF COURSe Choso would travel with Yuki! He was in a tube for 150 years, Yuki thinks it’s sad and unfair, and says to him: “I’m gonna show you the world”. I think he’s easy to impress, everything is new to him: new places, cultures, food, basically everything, even mundane things, and Yuki is kinda discovers all these things again with him, even though she might have seen them dozens of times before, got used to them and stopped noticing.

I think they would be like this meme: Yuki is talking too much and Choso is listening. She’s like a walking encyclopedia, tells facts and stories and thoughts about everything, kinda teaches him a course of modern human culture, shows him her favourite films, books, etc. (Choso would hate reading though, it’s too hard with all these kanji…She would probably read him out loud sometimes)

Choso takes Yuji Itadori’s surname for a fake passport and other documents, because he hates the very idea of having the same surname as his shitty father Kamo Noritoshi.

Yuki always comes up with the craziest, definitely not safe and sometimes illegal ideas, and Choso is like: “I’m in, because why not.” (Were they deported once from some country for breaking the law? Probably)

Choso is touch-starved, super clingy, always touching, always stays too close, embarrassingly sincere with everything he says. Sometimes gets jealous, when Yuki starts to flirt too much with someone (and she does it quite often).

I headcanon Yuki has never had romantic relationships with people who was a part of jujutsu world, or those who she could tell about this part of her life. Her partners weren’t happy she was always hiding something, couldn’t stand her random work schedule, her constant “work trips”, her sudden disappearances without warnings or with some half-assed excuses. As a result, even those partners she was serious about broke up with her at the end. So in relationships with Choso she finds absolutely new levels of openness and trust.  

Sometimes they go to the training room to beat the shit out of each other.

Yuki, realizing she accidentally chose a tearjerker movie with some siblings drama for their movie date night: daaaaaaaaaaaaamn

Once, when Yuki is abroad without Choso, she opens him a world of nudes and sexting (he’s awkward as hell with it)

I think that if their relationships got serious, Choso would like to have a proper family with a lot of kids, but I’m sure Yuki is a childfree, so their different views on their future could cause some tension or conflicts or even break up (but we ignore angst headcanons here, and move on)

Random headcanon about Yuki which is based only on my overthinking: I think she doesn’t go on missions, not because she’s careless or irresponsible or whatever, but because something terrible and traumatizing happened on a mission in her school days. In fanbook it’s said that her stress source is missions, which is kinda strange, because a) according to fanbook she’s the only sorcerer who is stressed about missions b) she’s special grade! Why stressing about missions? To experience something terrible because of curses, start avoiding missions and then come to the conclusion that the only way to not experience it again is to get rid of the very origin of curses - cursed energy - sounds reasonable. But maybe I’m just overthinking, and she just doesn’t like to work! (and I agree, work is shit!!)

Random headcanon about Choso: I think he will always feel a bit lonely in any company. He will never have the same bond he had with his brothers. Yes, he has Yuji, he will find other people he cares about and who care about him, but it will never be the same. He will always feel a bit off, a bit lost, a bit out of place, not understanding what people are talking about, not understanding how to treat them. And even if he’s happy with the life he has, he will always feel - somewhere deep down - that he doesn’t belong to this place.

Okay, this headcanon is absolutely terrible, but: WHAT IF Choso can’t age and die of old age because of his curse nature, so if they live a peaceful life after manga events, he outlives all people he cares about and sees them die?????(“we ignore angst headcanons here” I said, you know, like a liar).

Yuki: “Wow, the man who has no idea about gender roles and stereotypes in a society, how refreshing!”

Can I insert here my cat lover Choso headcanons? Yes, I can. One day when Yuki is away, Choso adopts a cat. Yuki has to accept it.

Yuki: my girl❤️   Choso: my girls❤️

___________________________________ Thank you for coming to my TED talk! I have no idea, how I managed to write such an embarrassing amount of text. When I read this ask for the first time, my first thought was: “damn, I don’t have any headcanons…”, but I decided to give it a try and lost control, it turns out I have A LOT! Looking forward to Gege ruining all of them!

[glucosehighs]

Kiyoomi who’s completely clueless when it comes to adulting things because the only thing he’s learnt from his parents growing up is that if you throw money at a problem, you can hire people to solve it for you.

He grew up with a housekeeper who took care of his meals and who called the plumber and electrician when anything needed fixing, so he’s never learnt any basic skills. 

Did he finally pick some things up in university? Absolutely not, he refused to stay with those slobs in campus housing. Since his family home is in Tokyo anyway, he opts to take the train home everyday instead.

Moving to Osaka to join MSBY is a massive cultural shock. He eats takeout for a whole month before he finally has had enough of the MSG and preservatives going into his body and money leaking out of his wallet (takeout is expensive for Omi’s rich boy tastebuds) and buys a single knife and a chopping board. He then lives on salad every day until the team’s dietician notices he’s not been putting on much muscle mass and instructs him to include meat in every meal. 

That’s when he caves and asks, through gritted teeth, if any of his teammates knows how to cook and would be willing to show him. That brings a round of slow blinks from around the room. 

Hinata breaks the silence. “Y-you don’t know how to cook, Omi-san?”

“Don’t look so shocked,” he grumbles. “I’m doing the restaurants near my area a favour, you know.” 

“When you say you don’t know how to cook,” Atsumu ventures. “Do you mean like, you can’t cook nice fancy meals?”

He stares Atsumu dead in the eye when he replies. “I’ve never cooked an egg in my life.” 

This causes something of an uproar in the locker room. “Never cooked an egg in your life,” Bokuto, who snacks on at least a dozen boiled eggs a day, looks almost faint.

The team then decided unanimously, without consulting him whatsoever, that it is of paramount importance that he should learn how to cook. They assign Atsumu, Bokuto, and Hinata the task, and the three of them show up on his doorstep that Saturday, armed with bags of groceries.

“Where are all your pots and pans, Omi-san?” Hinata’s brow is furrowed as he pulls open empty drawer after empty drawer in the kitchen. 

“I don’t see the need to own them,” Kiyoomi sniffs. “Oh, and be careful going into the toilet. One of the light bulbs stopped working, so I’m going to have to move out soon.” 

“You’re going to move out,” Atsumu repeats in a monotone, “because one of your lightbulbs is blown.” 

Kiyoomi honestly does not see anything wrong with his logic. “Yes, the apartment is no longer functional, so I’ll have to move.”

“How are you still alive?” Bokuto wonders with complete sincerity. 

Kiyoomi shrugs. He doesn’t have a response to that. 

The three of them get started on Kiyoomi’s unofficial education, coming over every weekend to teach him a new life skill. Bokuto teaches him how to change a lightbulb. Hinata shares recipes for quick meals from his time in Brazil, and falls over from laughing when Kiyoomi admits that he doesn’t know how to operate a microwave. Atsumu, who has apparently spent much time helping his brother start his restaurant, patiently teaches Kiyoomi how to do his taxes. 

Slowly, Kiyoomi starts to pick up these skills. It takes him a whole weekend of trial and error and ten different youtube videos, but the MSBY group chat floods with congratulatory messages when Kiyoomi shares that he fixed a leaky pipe in the bathroom all by himself. He manages not to freak out at the sight of a cockroach in his house, and instead manages to gather the guts to trap it under a container and fling it out of the window. (Atsumu sheds tears of pride when he recounts that particular anecdote to him). Finally, seven months after joining the Black Jackals, he invites the team over to his house for a home-cooked meal.

“So how likely is it that I’m going to get food-poisoning from this?” Inunaki is only half-joking. “I mean, I still remember how Bokuto told us that your first fried egg was crunchy because of all the bits of egg shell he found in it.”

Kiyoomi keeps his expression as neutral as possible as he lays the dishes out on the dining table. “Only one way to find out,” he intones. 

He watches as the team tentatively goes to take a bite of the food, and watches as their shoulders relax in relief, and the expressions on their faces turn to pure delight. 

“Wow, Omi-kun!” Bokuto exclaims. “This is really, really good!” 

“Yeah,” Atsumu chips in. “What can I say, you might just give my brother a run for his money.” The team hums in agreement, and praises him for the meal. 

Kiyoomi smiles to himself, and tries not to eye the seemingly innocuous kitchen cupboard where he’d stashed the takeout containers just seconds before the team had piled in. After all, no one needs to know about the disaster of a burnt pile sitting at the bottom of his trash bin. 

Anyway, as far as Kiyoomi is concerned, he couldn’t care less about not being able to cook or do any of those adult things his peers did. Why would he? If he ever needs anything, he has his family right here to help him out.

[into-daylight-hope]

Qui-Gon Jinn: Certified Hypocrite, Fascinating Failure, Mass of Contradictions

For starters, I am just going to let direct quotes from the man speak for itself.

Some excerpts from Master & Apprentice

Wise words.

Wait a minute...

😯😯 What the hell is happening here? All quotes are from the same man in one book.

Qui-Gon Jinn doesn't have an ounce of self-awareness and it is so hilariously terrible.

What is even better (or worse), this is perfectly in line with The Phantom Menace characterization .

I mean,

Remember when he said all this than spent the rest of the movie obsessing over prophecies, the chosen one and literally the future?

"He still has so much to learn of the living force." Qui-Gon Jinn about Obi-Wan in the council scene

After that scene

"The boy is dangerous. They all sense it why can't you?" Obi-Wan Kenobi about Anakin Skywalker to Qui-Gon Jinn

You see Obi-Wan, Master Jinn here has completely lost any sense of "here and now" between his crusade against darkness and divine mission to save the Galaxy.

This in turn, unsurprisingly blinds him to the fact Anakin is not suitable to become a Jedi. Or at least not ready to directly move on to becoming a padawan.

Anakin himself would suffer in a road that is not meant for him. But he is not planning for Anakin the child. He is thinking about The Glorious Chose One.

He is the chosen one. You all must, see it.

And yet from Qui-Gon's perspective it is Obi-Wan who doesn't understand the Living Force.

I have to say if he is truly a student of the living force as many fans claim he has been failing the class for at least 8 years.

Let's move on to another set of entertaining and horrifyingly oblivious quotes from M&A.

If you look upward you can observe Mr. Here and Now in his natural habitat.

He really acts like future is set in stone than thinks he is the right person to talk about about concentrating in the moment. Unbelievable.

Let's look at this dialogue again. In contrast with the excerpt from above.

He is all about the future when it suits him. But when Obi-Wan makes a remark on it he obviously should just focus on the moment. This is actually the third time in this post where he contradicts himself while specifically chastising or criticizing Obi-Wan for something Qui-Gon actually does.

Now I don't think Qui-Gon acts with malice. But it is important to point out his obliviousness has become a way of ensuring he is never in the wrong.

He suffers from an immense hubris. And a man obsessed with prophecies and chosen ones definitely has some kind of savior complex.

But notably Jinn doesn't actually want to put any effort into enacting real change with his limited yet existent capabilities.

He turns down a council seat in M&A because he thinks it would hold him down. From what? Dear God, the reason they offered him a seat was for different opinions. Qui-Gon can complain all he wants but one time he actually had a chance to make his opinions a reality he freaking bailed.

Why? He doesn't want to face his own limits. He can't bare to try and fail. It is much easier to sustain a superiority complex when you are complaining from the sidewalk.

So he fixates all this belief onto prophecies, visions that will magically cure the Galaxy. And of course his place to help fulfill them. To the point where it is the one thing that keeps him standing.

He has binded meaning of his life and belief for goodness dangerously close to his supposed importance in the Galaxy. (You can feel the influences of his former master)

His absolute refusal to engage with reality turns him into mass of contradictions. Cause he doesn't know what he will find or become if he is mistaken in his belief of himself.

He can't face reinvention on the event of defeat.

But this situation was different. It had to be, because the only thing Qui-Gon knew to be absolutely true was that his vision was real.

Oh by the way, it turned out he misunderstood the vision. But when does being wrong ever stopped Qui-Gon Jinn?

No words.

Only Qui-Gon could have come near declaring himself a prophet after making a mistake. Maybe stop and reflect man? Just stop and think about your actions.

Obi-Wan Kenobi: I have a bad feeling about this.

Qui-Gon Jinn: I don't sense anything.

Of course you don't.

Honestly he doesn't have much to speak for in the cosmic force department either.

(There is the whole force ghost thing I guess. But I have no idea if that is more connected with living or cosmic force. It seems to be more about spiritual enlightenment. Which is ridiculous when you consider Yoda had go through so many trials, face his darkside, learn to truly let go just for Force priestesses to deem him worthy enough to study immortality. Yes Qui-Gon never became a force ghost but he had started his training before he died. And much of Yoda's tests on TCW was about self-awareness. It is not just about being a good person. How did Force Priestesses approve Qui-Gon "I was meant to misinterpret this vision." Jinn? I would understand if he became wiser after death and faced his flaws and all but he never was on that level before he died. You might say even Anakin became a force ghost. But I would remind you, Anakin in the end broke out of denial, acknowledged the wrong of his ways and took that leap to the light side. Self-awareness seems such an important key to becoming a force ghost. Right there with selflessness. Personally it doesn't quite feel right for a character whose biggest flaws are their lack of introspection and hubris which we never see him rise above to be the one that discovers immortality again. It feels more like a rushed plot point to explain how we get from A to B.)

This post got out of control 😂. I honestly just wanted to point out lack of communication might be one of the reasons Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon have trouble understanding each other but it is sometimes even harder to understand Qui-Gon when he actually says something. Cause ration is not what drives him.

Qui-Gon is such a complex character. He is undeniably good especially compared to other SW characters. Yet for all fandom's deifying he might be the most flawed Jedi we see on the franchise. (The ones that fell to the dark side not included.)

It is a shame wider fandom completely write off his flaws to the degree I can't even recognize the character when they talk about Jinn. Cause that Qui-Gon is so hard to feel empathy for.

When people constantly make statements like "He is The Wisest sw character." his hypocrisy stops being amusing. It doesn't end on screen or page instead often used to bash other characters.

An unbelievable analysis from Wookiepedia:

When Jinn saved the Gungan exile Jar Jar Binks, who in turn swore a life-debt to him, his compassionate nature was such that Jinn took the hapless Gungan under his wing, much to Kenobi's dismay. His empathy toward all life forms, including the most pitiful and unfortunate, was Jinn's greatest strength. Additionally, he remained understanding and patient with Queen Padmé Amidala. During the short time they knew each other, he never asked for her to do more than she was willing to.

You know out of the two, Qui-Gon was the one who insulted Jar Jar to his face. And he didn't took Jar Jar under his wing. They forced him to take them to a city where Jar Jar could have been punished for entering. Now it was the pragmatic thing to do. For all three's survival not for their own gain. Understandable. But compassion is just pushing it.

Also he never asked Padme to do more than she was willing to do?

Padmé : Are you sure about this? Trusting our fate to a boy we hardly know? The Queen will not approve.

Qui-Gon Jinn : The Queen does not need to know.

Padmé : Well, I don't approve.

And he is aware she is the queen, herself. Padme was nearly tearing out her because of this man in TPM.

What is weird, Jinn in his bewildering hypocrisy probably thinks he is being admirably compassionate with Jar Jar, highly understanding and patient with Padme. We clearly see he is not.

Out of universe he has been a force ghost for decades now but fandom is nowhere near acknowledging his flaws than he is.

And honestly SW doesn't have that many major morally complex characters. People like Maul, Palpatine, Anakin,Ventress don't think they are serving a higher purpose or oblivious to the evils they commit.

Emotionally complicated, yes. Going through moral dilemmas, no.

Three major characters come to mind who make huge mistakes, condone or commit atrocities while thinking they are in the right/with good intentions/for a greater cause. With varying degrees of culpability.

Qui-Gon. Padme. Dooku.

In that order.

Let these characters be interesting instead of demonizing nearly inhumanly selfless Jedi characters. (They make mistakes too but funnily enough they are still way better beings than most people on our planet.)

By the way I found the epitaph "Fascinating Failure" from the article here. Especially the last paragraphs make some interesting points. ⬇️

👀

This post might seem harsh but that is expected since it focuses on Qui-Gon's flaws.

"People are more than their worst act,” Quote from Qui-Gon Jinn in Master & Apprentice

[not-me-simping-for-blasty]

Wrong Number, Asshole - A Bakugou Katsuki Soulmate AU

All Parts

Part 24:

You groaned, rolling over to grab your dinging phone off the nightstand. 

Rubbing at your eyes, you sat up against your headboard, breathing deeply. As it turns out, a highly emotional day like the one you had yesterday could really tire a person out. It was so tiring in fact that you had collapsed almost the second you fell into bed last night. You had been pretty much dead to the world since. 

Opening your phone, you nearly rolled your eyes at the text waiting for you.

You scoffed. He sure was petulant today, wasn’t he?

He began typing again, but deleted his words.

Now, you were a little nervous. You weren’t being clingy- right? Sure, you really wanted nothing more than to see him again, and sort of felt that maybe you were entitled to that considering he was your soulmate, but maybe the feeling wasn’t mutual?

Who were you kidding, he might have texted you but that didn’t mean he liked you as much as you liked him. This was Bakugou after all, and even if he somehow did, he’d rather chew his own leg off than admit it. 

You read through the texts again, hoping and praying that you didn’t sound too desperate. It was another few minutes before he responded again. With an answer that really did absolutely nothing to quell your fears. 

You blinked owlishly at his reply, before sending him a quick “okay”. 

Bakugou always seemed to know when you were overthinking things- and, on one hand, it was annoying because he never understood that him and his dismissive words were the cause, but, on the other hand, it was nice. To finally feel understood for once. And to finally talk to someone who’s responses, when he tried, were intentionally made so blunt that you couldn’t possibly misunderstand them.

Sighing, you pulled your tired body out of bed and headed for the shower. Apparently your plans, which had originally consisted of being lazy the entire afternoon, were suddenly changing. Not that you were complaining though.

--/--

Stepping out of the cab, you noticed the crowd once again swarming the front of the hospital. The horde of people almost seemed to be moving as one mass, pushing and pulsing against the security guards standing at the entrance. There were a lot of people covered in Dynamite merch and face paint, even little kids dressed up like Bakugou and feigning explosions as they played.

 It seemed that Bakugou’s heroic deed had put him back in the public’s favor and now they all had gathered in a show of support- and while you could appreciate that as a symbol of community, you selfishly sort of wished they’d leave so visiting him would be less of a spectacle. 

You realized suddenly that more of this was definitely going to be in your future; the crowds of screaming people and adoring, over-excited fans. Your soulmate was a pro-hero after all, and quite possibly the loudest man you’d ever met- you should’ve known a quiet life wasn’t going to be an option. 

As it stood now, you had almost no idea how you were going to make it through the massive throng of bodies- and, even if you did somehow push to the front, how you were going to convince the guards to let you through at that point.

“Excuse me!” A young girl suddenly grabbed your arm, tiny fingers clasping around your wrist. “Do you know how to get in! I need to get in!”

You were blindsided, stopped in your tracks and held down by the girl. She was young, but not much younger than you- if you had to guess, she was 17 or 18, with bright eyes and a strong grip that surprised you. This, her, was certainly not what you expected out of today.

“I- why do you need to get in so badly?”

“Bakugou!” She exclaims, eyes glazed over starry and adoring. She thrusts out her other wrist, presenting you with a poorly drawn tattoo. “See? I’m his soulmate!” 

Your stomach drops, and for a second you nearly believe it- but then you snap out of it, and all you can think about is how strange the situation is. She was young, so obviously young, and so clearly charmed by your soulmate’s hero persona. You thought it was a little funny- if she knew Bakugou like you did, you were almost sure she wouldn’t be as delighted with him. 

You weren’t sure how to respond. The immature, prideful part of you wanted to scoff and shake her hands off of you- to tell her just how foolish she looked talking to his actual soulmate. But, then again, you weren’t sure you could say anything about that at all. In all the research you’d done on him, you hadn’t seen a single mention of a soulmate- he never talked about it, never let anyone see even a hint of your name tattooed on him. Maybe he wanted to hide it for the sake of his career? Or, worse, was embarrassed of it?

“H-his soulmate, huh?” You stutter out, unsurely. 

“Yep! So that’s why I need to get in there so bad! To make sure he’s okay!” She rambles. “So, will you help me get in?”

“Y/n! Y/n L/n!” You hear a familiar voice yell, and when you look towards the sound, all you see is a flash of red hair and hands waving emphatically.

Kirishima. Thank god.

“I’ve gotta go.” You shake the girl’s hand off, slightly jostling her with the force.   “I’m so sorry!” 

You hardly recognize the disappointed look in her eyes before your arm is grabbed once again- but this time by a security guard as he leads you to the front. The guard deposits you at the entrance, just a few feet from where Kirishima is waiting for you.

“Sorry about that.” The red-head chuckles nervously, opening the door up for you. “I uh- I woulda said something earlier, but I couldn’t see you to point out for a guard. It’s totally my bad!”

“No, it’s good, you’re good.” You reassure him, following him as he leads you to the stairwell from yesterday. “Thanks for saving me. I was pretty overwhelmed.”

“Yeah. It can get pretty crazy out there- not as crazy as Bakugou, though! You shoulda totally seen him screamin’ and yelling at the window when you walked up. He was super pissed.”

“Sounds like him.” You can’t help but smile. “Doesn’t surprise me at all.” 

“Yeah.” Kirishima nods. “Who was that girl- you know her?”

Your silence and the uneasy expression that rolls across your face must give it away- he almost immediately pales.

“Oh! Yeah- sorry, none of my business, right?” Kirishima turns to face you, stopping at the step above you for a moment and throwing out placating hands. “It’s totally cool, don’t feel obligated or anything, I was just curious! Sorry for prying though, that wasn’t manly of me at all.”

You almost couldn’t believe Kirishima was such close friends with Bakugou- he seemed like the total opposite of your soulmate.

“No! It’s fine- I wasn’t offended or anything. Just,” You paused, looking at you feet as they climbed higher. “She wanted me to help her get in. To Bakugou. Said she was his soulmate.” 

Kirishima turns around again, his feet nearly catching on the step as his mouth drops open. “She said that? To you! That’s insane!”

“Yep.” You nod, slightly breathless and you finally reached the fourth floor. You let out a small chuckle as you continued down the hallway. “She was young though- definitely a fan, so I didn’t say anything. I didn’t really want to crush her dreams in front of all of those people.”

“Man, that’s good. She’d probably be super upset, right? Good job!” He throws you an enthusiastic thumbs up, all shark teeth and bright eyes. “Still though- I shoulda guessed it was somethin��� crazy like that. You looked totally freaked out back there!” 

“Did I really?”

“Mhm,” He nods, finally stopping in front of Bakugou’s door. “I- uh, I better stay out here. He’ll be real mad if I let anyone else through. Especially if you’re in there.” 

“Oh. Yeah. Okay.” You push the handle open, turning back for just a moment. “Nice to see you, though. Thanks again for the save, Kirishima!” 

When you enter the room, you’re surprised to find Bakugou, grumpy and sitting in a chair next to the window. And not in his hospital bed resting- where you’re almost 100% sure he should be. He’s clad in a weird combination of hospital pants and his own sweatshirt- it only serves to make him look even more petulant as he sits with his pinched expression.

“You seemed real buddy-buddy with Shitty Hair.” He grumbles, but there’s a smile beginning to tug at his lips as you near. “You think he’s better than me or some shit?”

“Oh- yeah. Loads. Loads better actually.” You joke, taking the vacant seat next to him. When you turn to look at him, he’s already glaring at you. “Oh calm down, grumpy, I was joking. Box dye and bandanas aren’t really my thing.”

Bakugou laughs. “He’s been pullin’ that shit since high school. Kinda losin’ all hope he’ll ever be cool.”

“Hey- don’t be mean! Maybe he’s just an extra-late bloomer, you never know.” You sigh, fixing him with a serious stare. “Now, though, we should really move onto more pressing matters.”

“Which are?”

“You in one of these chairs, and not in a hospital bed!” You near shrieked. “Which- by the way, I looked it up- four stories is 40 feet! You fell 40 fuckin’ feet and you’re not in a hospital bed, right now!” 

Bakugou just rolls his eyes, fixing his gaze on the window once more. “Stop your freakin’ out already, woman, I’ll be fine. I’m already healed from all the big injuries anyway- so just shut the fuck up about it already.” 

“The big injuries- what about the small ones? Bakugou! 40 feet! Do you know how much that is! I feel like you’re not taking this seriously enough!” 

“Who cares.” He shrugs, settling into his seat with a slight wince. “Didn’t fuckin’ kill me, so who cares.” 

“Me! You idiot! How many times do have to make this clear to you!” 

Bakugou just looks at you, eyes widening as he breath catches. He looks genuinely and plainly shocked- easily the most expressive you’d seen him be aside from rolling in pure anger.

“I already told you, you fuckin’ asshole, that I like you and care about you! So of course I’m happy that you’re not dead, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about the small stuff!” You emphasized, sighing as you run an errant hand through your hair. “And I can see you’re still fucking hurt, so of course I’m going to freak out when you’re not in a hospital bed- like you should be, and you’re not sitting there resting- like you should be! Who the hell even helped you up? Why the fuck would they ev-”

“Shut up already. I get it.” He mumbles, and when you look at him his cheeks are bright red and he’s biting his knuckle. His eyes are alive though- bright and simmering and so very, very red. “I got up myself. Don’t go blamin’ anyone else for it.” 

“God. Of fucking course you did! You know- you make yourself really hard to care for, right?” 

“I know.”

“And it’s just like- I do it anyway, you know! And get shit-all nothing but anxiety and still choose to do it anyway! You’re so fucking frustrating!”

“I know.”

You turn to look at him, but he’s already looking at you, something soft and pleased growing at the edge of his lips. 

“No! Don’t just sit there and start smiling.” You huff, pointing an emphatic finger at his stupid smiling face. “I’m mad at you and you need to go back to bed so don’t just fuckin’ smile at me!” 

“I get it.”

“No, obviously, you dont! Because you’re not getting up! So, c’mon,” You stand from your chair, offering a hand. “Let me help you.”

Bakugou just looks at your hand, glares at it, and stands by himself. You can see the strain plainly on his face- how the action winds him and how it sends pain shooting through his battered body. When you look at his eyes though, all you can see is resolute stubbornness. With great effort, and even greater determination, Bakugou manages to hobble over to the wall, dropping against it. His shoulders hit first, and then he’s rolling all of his weight back onto them.

You were stunned- not that he chose to do it, because of course he chose to, but mostly that he’d succeeded. You’d seen a clip of his fall, it was playing on the news before you’d left your house, and it looked nasty. When he hit the ground, all of his limbs were so mangled and impact alone knocked him out clean. The injuries he still had, broken bones and cracked ribs, at the very least, must’ve still been causing him great pain- and yet he surpassed those with sheer force of will alone. It would’ve impressed you; if seeing him in so much pain didn’t make you so sad.

“That didn’t look comfortable. I really think you need crutches, angry man.” You point to the bed. “Or you could just go lay back down, like you’re supposed to, and we could forget this whole argument.”

“No thanks. Done bein’ fucking fussed over. The only reason I haven’t left yet is because there’s people everywhere.” 

“And because you’re not supposed to, remember?”

“No. It’s good now. Nurse said I could.” He says, groaning when you stare back at him entirely unimpressed. He points to a bundle of papers and medication on the bed. “Look, gave me all the discharge instructions and everything. I’m not fucking lying.”

You walk over, flipping quickly through the packet of instructions. Bakugou wasn’t lying- he really was approved for discharge apparently, albeit under very specific instructions for not over-exerting himself. Which he was obviously doing so great at so far. 

Sighing, you folded the papers and placed them in the bag with all of his medicine. Regardless of what he wanted, you were going to make sure he took care of himself. And that included, taking all of the medication and performing the physical therapy outlined on the papers.

“Alright, then. Guess we’re going, after all.” You clap your hands together in finality, before grabbing the bag of medication. “I still think you need crutches though.”

You look him up and down, eyes zeroing in on the way he was huddled against the wall. All his weight was in his shoulders, and in any other situation, you might’ve thought it was an effortlessly cool pose- but not here. Not in this hospital room with him dressed in weird clinical sweats and a childish expression.

“I’m not getting crutches. Lame as shit.”

“Are you kidding me? Your body is literally beat to hell- who cares about how cool you look right now?”

Bakugou just nods toward the window, and you peer down to see the crowd from earlier still gathered below. It seemed like cameras and reporters had also joined, and they were making a worrying amount of headway to the door, pushing against security impatiently. It looked entirely overwhelming, if you were honest.

“If I leave with crutches,” He starts. “Then I gotta hear about that shit for fuckin’ weeks.”

“Are you serious?” You ask appalled. “You’re obviously injured! What the hell are they even gonna s-“

Bakugou just hits you with a pointed stare, and it stops you in your tracks.

He’s right. Any weakness- even crutches when injured- would read bad for his career. It would shatter the illusion people had of him. Of his infallibility and limitless strength.

“It’ll draw too much fuckin’ attention,” He elaborates, pulling the hood over his head. “No shitty sweatshirt could help me then.”

“Wait, that’s your disguise for sneaking out? A sweatshirt?”

Bakugou just nods, suddenly pulling the hood up and over his head. It flattens his wild hair against his forehead, and you nearly squeal. He looks adorable- although still very much like himself. You weren’t so sure this disguise would cut it, but you were pretty much out of other options. It would have to make do.

“Yeah. Okay. I get it, put the hood back down.” You pause, trying your hardest to think of another solution. “How about a wheelchair?”

Bakugou just looks even more offended- like your last request was a front to his very dignity. Hell, knowing him as you did, you figured it probably was.

“Yeah, fine, I get it, angry man- no wheelchair.” You sigh. “At least let me help you then? I mean, it looks like you need something at least.”

“No. I fuckin’ don’t.” He refuses hotly, shifting his weight agitatedly against the wall. “I’m fine.”

You roll your eyes, you should’ve expected him to be difficult about this. It seemed that appearing weak was his greatest fear; you thought that was a little ironic- that his biggest weakness was weakness itself.

“Seriously- please. You look like you’re about to keel over where you stand, Bakugou!”

“I told you not to fuckin’ call me that, anymore.” He retorts angrily, but you watch him wince when he moves too much. “And I told you, I’m fine. So just shut the hell up about it already.”

You watch him for another moment, taking careful stock of the way he leans back on his shoulders and curls his arms around his sides. You didn’t ask him specifically- but you’re sure now, Bakugou’s at least got broken ribs- among many other broken and sprained things probably.

Fine, if he won’t readily accept your help, than you’ll just have to goad him into admitting his own failure.

“Hmm, sure, then step away from the wall then, hot shot.”

He’s quiet, but you watch as his eyebrows pinch and his cheeks redden.

“Why? Stop bein’ fuckin’ weird! I’m just standing for a second, leave me the hell alone, shitty woman.”

You just shake your head. It almost disgusts you how much rolling fondness smothers what should’ve definitely been annoyance.

“So, you’re telling me,” You start, walking a little closer to him. “That if you stepped away from this wall right now- that you wouldn’t immediately fold in half like a lawn chair?”

“No!”

“Okay. So do it then, pop rocks. C’mon. Let’s see.”

“I’m- I’m not just gonna fuckin’ do something just because you goddamn told me too!”

“Not even if it’s a challenge?” You tease, nearing him even more. You’re just a few measly feet away now, staring defiantly up at petulant red eyes. “Because it is- a challenge. I bet you that you can’t do it.”

“Fuck you.” He grits out, but then he’s pushing off his shoulders and standing straight. “See? That’ll teach ya to run your stupid mouth about shit you don’t know dick about.”

“Hmm, good words, Katsuki- expressive, even. We’ll see how long you last.”

He doesn’t say anything, but you can see his jaw clenched down; his shoulder’s strung tightly, the slight twitch in his calves. Katsuki isn’t going to stay upright for much longer.

You move before you even recognize it, sidling up to him and ducking under his arm.

“What are you- Stop! Get the hell away!” He barks harshly, but stands in place, not really doing much other than flushing violently. “It’s- I don’t need your fuckin’ help!”

“No, Katsuki, chill out- stop,” You laugh, rearranging his heavy arm over your shoulder. “If we’re doing this then I’m going to help you!”

“Lemme go! I’ll fuckin’ crush you, I don’t need your help!”

“Okay, yes, fine, maybe you don’t need it, but it would make me feel a whole lot better if you accepted it,” You huff, your hand wrapped tight around his wrist. “And you won’t crush me- I’m a big girl, I promise I’ll be fine. So just stop being stubborn- for me? Please?”

He growls, rolling his eyes to the ceiling- but then he’s shuffling closer to you and shaking his head. If you thought his arm was heavy before, you were sorely mistaken- when Katsuki finally surrenders, the solid weight of all his muscles nearly takes you out. You stumble for a moment before regaining your balance.

“Idiot. Thought you said you could handle it?” Katsuki looks down at you, smirking slightly before once again rolling his eyes. “Now, c’mon, fuckin’ get on with it, sunshine.”

You resist the sudden slight urge to nudge his ribs, or let him collapse to the ground- this was your idea, and you wouldn’t let your child of a soulmate talk you out of helping him.

“So, I was thinking-“ You begin to shuffle with him, slightly breathless. “We sneak out the back. Or something. There’s a crowd outside.”

“Already established that, several times, fuckin’ ages ago, dipshit- and of fuckin’ course there is. It’s me.”

“Oh my god, this is not the time for your ego!” You groan, but still keep a steady pace as you begin, towards the door. “Speaking of, though, one of your fangirls told me somethin’ real interesting on the way in, though.”

“Christ. What?”

“Apparently, she’s your soul mate.” You laugh, shallowly, trying to project a confidence you couldn’t feel. “C’mon, Katsuki, you should’ve told me! Total dick move that I had to find out from her!”

He scoffs, patting your shoulder with the hand strung across it. “You fuckin’ tell her off or somethin’?”

“Nope. I told her that I think you guys would make a really cute couple!”

“Are you fuckin’ serious?”

“No- of course not.” You say stopping in front of the door for a quick break. You suddenly weren’t sure whether you could really do this or not. “I didn’t say much of anything, really, didn’t know if I could.”

“Hah?” He looks down at you funny, red eyes squinting. “Fuck’s that mean?”

“You know, your career? Didn’t wanna say anything just in case.”

“Incase’a what?”

“I- I don’t know,” You stutter, suddenly feeling insecure. You focus your eyes on the tiles beneath your feet so you don’t have to look at his eyes. Eyes that you can feel boring into the side of your head. “Just in case, you know?”

“No. I fuckin’ don’t.” He says, mild irritation coloring his voice from above you. “Stop thinking so goddamn much, I can’t fuckin’ keep up- just tell me what you’re all worked up over.”

“It’s-“ You sigh, ringing your hands together anxiously. “You’re- you’re not embarrassed, right? Because, I know I shouldn’t have done this but I was looking you up again, and I just- I didn’t see anything about you having a soulmate? Anywhere? Ever? Do you just not want people to know or- because that’s totally fine, you know, like I get it, you’ve got this super big career outside of me and I’m totally fine if you just wanna like not say anything to anyone or lik-“

“Idiot. Stop thinking so much.” Bakugou tilts his head towards the ceiling. “I’m not fuckin’ embarrassed of you.”

“T-then why?” You ask hesitantly, while staring at your feet. You’re not sure if it’s the jarring movement as he rearranges his weight or your racing heart, but either way you’re feeling sick. “Actually- you know what, it’s fine, forget I even said anything. It’s fine. I’m fine.”

Bakugou doesn’t say anything, just nods and stays silent. Then he looks down at you, at the way you won’t meet his eyes, and he groans.

“Fuckin- fine. God, you always make me say the most embarrassing shit.” He gripes, flushing slightly as you finally look up at him. “It’s not because of any of that stupid shit. It’s- I fuckin’, ugh, I didn’t want somebody else findin’ you or whatever before I did.”

“What? Find me? Who?”

“God, you’re fuckin’ dense.” He scoffs, but when you look up he’s still smiling lazily down at you. “People. Media. Fuckin’ villians probably too.”

“Holy shit.”

“Chill out. I kept fuckin’ quiet so you don’t gotta worry about that now. Besides-“ He turns his head away, cheeks flushing slightly. “I’d blast all those fuckin’ weaklings to hell if they tried anything now. So don’t get all anxious about it or whatever.”

You just look down at your feet, smiling at his words but still feeling unsure nonetheless. You understood- for sure, but that didn’t mean the weight of all these consequences was easy to bear.

“Now can we go? Are we done worryin’ about stupid shit?” He asks lightly, jostling you slightly. “Got more important things to do.” 

You nod, opening the door just to watch Kirishima stumble backwards.

“Oi- shitty hair! What’re you leanin’ against my door like that for?”

“Oh! Hey guys!” He greets cheerfully, before taking stock of the situation. He tilts his head. “You guys leaving?”

“Obviously.” Bakugou scoffs, but then he’s leaning in toward his friend, dropping his other hand heavy on the red-head’s shoulder. “Need ya to distract anyone who walks up here though. Gonna leave the other way and go out the fuckin’ back.” 

“Oh- yeah, okay! Got it, man! You sure you should be leaving though?”

“That’s what I said.” You interrupt, glaring Bakugou into silence as he tries to speak. “But he insisted- and I’ve got all his meds and instructions so I think we’ll be alright. Maybe. If we’re lucky.”

“Don’t just fuckin’ talk about me like I’m not standin’ right here, shitty woman!”

“I wouldn’t have to if you weren’t so difficult all the time!” You retorted. “Now, you can handle it from here, right Kirishima? We really could use your help.”

“Yep! Totally got this! You guys go on ahead, I’ll stand guard right here!” He flashes a bright smile at you, before pointing down the hall. “There’s a staff elevator just down there. You should use that- it’ll probably be way faster. Good luck!” 

You just nod, smiling brightly at him as you pull Bakugou in that direction.

“Oi- not so fuckin’ fast!” He shouts, stumbling slightly.

“Keep your voice down, angry man! Everyone’s gonna know it’s you!”

“How the fuck is my voice gonna give it away?” He says, while simultaneously screaming like a banshee in the middle of an otherwise quiet hallway.

“Like that! So keep it down, good fucking lord.” You grumble, a breath of relief leaving your mouth as you finally near the elevator. You push the button, sighing as the doors open.

Bakugou shuffles away from you, leaning against the back wall and staring moodily at you as you press the button. The elevator surges downward, and after a minute or so the doors began to open again. You shouldered his arm once more looking up to see him pulling the hood of the sweatshirt farther down his face. He looked adorable and you couldn’t keep yourself from staring.

“Oi- fuck you lookin’ at, woman?”

“Nothing.” You laughed. “Now, c’mon, we’ve still got a ways to go.”

Sneaking Bakugou out was no easy affair to begin with, and he certainly didn’t help whatsoever. His frame was just too large and too heavy, and there was no possible way he could be quiet, especially considering his thundering steps, even when he wasn’t screaming. He seemed to attract attention no matter where he was or what he was doing. People were starting to stare as you booked it towards the back exit- you needed to move. And quick.

“Jesus christ,” You huffed, breathless and slightly irritated. You point at his stomach as you pull him along. “I know you’re hurt, but could you at least try and engage those core muscles you so obviously have?”

“You said you’d be fuckin’ fine, sunshine.”

“God, you’re difficult.” You shook your head, rolling your eyes at the sight of his amused little half-smile. “You think this is funny don’t you?”

Bakugou doesn’t say anything, but when you look up at him, there’s still that small smile edging at his lips. He seems to hold it, even through his grunts of obvious pain.

“Wow, of course you do. Immature, angry, loud man.”

“Who says I’m fuckin’ loud?” He asks hotly, pulling his shoulders in as you both shimmy through the, admittedly, small back door. “I’m not fucking loud!”

“God, you’re screaming right now! Do you even hear yourself?” You wince, but feel relieved as you help him hobble to the curb. “How’s a taxi sound, pop rocks?”

“Don’t fuckin’ call me that. I hate it. Don’t do it again.” He grumbles. “But it’s fine- whatever, I don’t care.” 

“Great.”

You raise your hand up, nearly crying in relief when a taxi rolls up to the curb. When you help Bakugou in, and slide in the seat next to him, you’re almost overcome with satisfaction. Sneaking him out was one of the most difficult tasks you thought you’d ever taken on- both physically and mentally, and god, were you glad it was over.

--/--

As it turns out, explosive personalities don’t always lend themselves to explosive environments.

Bakugou’s apartment was clean, tidy, nearly spotless when you helped him walk in. It surprised you, truly, but he didn’t let you sit on that thought for long. He brushed you off, hobbling slowly down a long hallway without a word. It takes a few minutes, but Bakugou enters the room at the end and slams the door shut behind him.

Oh- What exactly were you supposed to do now?

In reality your fingers were itching to open drawers and rifle through cabinets, and just generally snoop but you, of course, knew better. So you instead chose to read through the instruction papers and medications once more- just to busy yourself and maybe see if there was anyway you could help him. Since, apparently, Bakugou was not keen on asking you for assistance himself.

You hear the door open again, and Bakugou comes unsteadily down the hallway, nearly collapsing when he reaches his couch. He’s dressed in new sweats, and he turns to look at you.

“Fuck you doin’ over there?”

“Meds, angry man.” You say, doling out the few necessary pills from a bottle. “Where’s your glasses?”

“You don’t have to fuckin’ do that.”

“What- you’re gonna force yourself to get up again?” You ask him, unimpressed. “You’re hurt, so just please let me help you. At least with this.”

He nods tightly, mouth pressed into a thin line. “Glasses are in the cabinet behind ya.”

You nod, filling a glass of water for him and walking the medication over. Watching as he took it, you weren’t exactly sure what to do now. So you just sort of hovered next to the couch, arms around your stomach anxiously.

“What’re you doing- sit the fuck down already, idiot.” He pats the seat next to him. “Stop being weird. Freaks me the hell out.”

“Yeah. Sorry.” You laughed. “Just didn’t wanna assume- in case you wanted me to leave or something.”

“Wouldn’t have let you in if I wanted you to leave. Dumbass.” He reaches over, flicking your forehead lightly. “Your stupid thoughts are clogging up the air. Stop it.”

“Hey!” You whine, rubbing at your forehead. “Not nice, angry man! I’ll let it go this time, but try it again and I promise you’ll really be hurting.”

“Mhm. I’m sure.”

He settles further into the couch, throwing his head back and closing his eyes. The mid-day sun floods through the window, hitting the column of his throat, and casting him in gold. You think he’s beautiful then. Far more beautiful than anyone else you’d ever known.

“Yeah, sorry.” You breathe out, suddenly a little nervous by your close proximity to him. “Think those’ll probably make you a little sleepy.”

“Fuckin’ stellar.”

“Don’t sound so grumpy- it’s just a nap. And besides, you should probably be taking one anyway.”

“It’s not that.” He peeks an eye open, lazily rolling his head to catch your gaze. “You hungry?”

“No- I’m good. Are you?” You ask suddenly. “I can totally get you something? Or make you something? What do you have here? What do you want?”

“Jesus, sunshine. Slow the fuck down.” He breathes, turning his head back to the ceiling with a small, fond, smile. He sighs sleepily. “I’m good. Just wanted to ask ya.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

He mumbles something, but you don’t quite catch onto it. It’s quiet for a few moments, before his breathing is starting to slow. Your surprised at just how tired he seems to be, but then again, he was taking some pretty strong pain meds. As it stands now, he seemed minutes from falling asleep, and you were worried about the strain he was putting on his neck.

“Hey- you shouldn’t fall asleep like that.” You touch his shoulder lightly, fingers just barely brushing the fabric of his shirt. “Lay down, I’ll get up.”

Bakugou just opens his eyes, only glancing at you for a moment before he closes them again. Then he’s tipping over, a flurry of heavy limbs and awkward weight hitting your lap. When you look down at him, his eyes are squeezed tightly closed and he’s blushing wildly. He kicks his feet up off the floor, and settles in, quickly becoming deadweight across your thighs.

“O-oh.” You say, breathless. “Yeah. Okay.”

“Mhm. Now shut the fuck up, I’m tryin’ to sleep.” 

“Yeah.” 

You’re winded, short of breath and flushing bright red from his actions; but still, you find you absolutely can’t help yourself. So, with shaking breaths, you’re carding fingers through his hair before you can think better of it. 

When you look down at him, Bakugou’s only gone brighter red, but he’s smiling too. He stills, before suddenly peaking one eye open.

“Wake me up for dinner, alright, idiot?”

You nod and then he’s closing his eyes again, chest rising and falling slowly. He’s asleep and dead to the world in just a few minutes, but you can’t stop staring.

You knew you liked him- liked him a lot, as a person, not just a soulmate. You liked his weird brand of humor and his insults and death threats. You liked his masked concern and blunt words, you were even strangely fond of his yelling- but you weren’t prepared for just how much those feelings would amplify when he was so close. He was close, and warm, and breathing under your fingertips and you liked him so much. More than you’d ever liked anything or anyone else in your entire life. 

You were stricken, absolutely smitten, and there was nothing you could do about it. Or even wanted to really. So you just stared, eyes tracking his calm features as you worked careful fingers through his soft hair.

You understood now- why so many of your peers had told you they were jealous. Why they had all sighed dreamily when you told them, before immediately wishing to be you. Having a soulmate was inexplicable completeness and undeniable purpose- it was finality and new beginnings all in one.

You understood now, and you wouldn’t trade it for anything. 

//-//

ee soz this took so long!! no excuses lmao i just stupidly started playin genshin and holy shIT was that bad for my productivity ahahaha

hope u enjoy my lovelies!!!!

[blueink2k]

Propaganda in Death Note and How It Played Into Light’s God Complex

[This is based on information from the anime, as I have yet to read the manga for myself. Caps from or references to the manga may be included to emphasize points or provide visuals, but the version of the plot I'm referring to is taken from the anime.]

Light Yagami does not pick up the Death Note knowing he’s going to use it to commit mass murder and become the God of his New World.

Actually, he does the opposite. He kills someone to test it as he’s under the impression it isn’t real, convinces himself it was a freak coincidence, and decides to try it out in a way that will provide a more concrete conclusion. When it does end up working he’s stunned, to say the least.

“I killed them both...I killed two men. Those were human lives. I-It won’t be overlooked. Besides, who am I to pass judgment on others?”

Light Yagami, the perfect, straight-A, model student, has just confirmed he killed two people using some strange supernatural notebook that just happened to fall into his hands. He’s always believed strongly in his morals. He’s been on course his whole life to join the police force like his father an deliver justice, and here he is, an indirect murderer. 

So what does he do about it?

...He comes up with a reason to justify himself. 

The people he killed were criminals. Mere scum who do nothing but rot and infect the world. Wouldn’t everyone be better off without them? It isn’t that he’s never considered this before, he has, albeit not to the same degree as taking their deaths into his own hands. But now that he has the power to do so, why shouldn’t he? He’s smart, he’s determined. He’s capable of it.

In fact, in his mind, he’s the only one who is.

He’s kind of right. He’s the top of his class, he comes out on top in national tests, he barely even has to try. Plus, he’s the only one that has a Death Note, and therefore the power to do this. 

At this point in time, he doesn’t consider himself a god. He doesn’t want to rule the world, he just wants to change it. Something else important to note is that he doesn’t refer to himself as Kira or anything other than Light. 

...That is, until...

Websites start popping up all over claiming that whoever this mass murderer is is named “Kira”, a god among men risen to punish criminals and save the world.

Two things to note here;

Apparently, “Kira” is returning, meaning there must have been some kind of previous belief in an entity that either did something similar to Light or had the same beliefs. There isn’t any other canon mention of a previous Kira, and this in and of itself is pretty vague, but given that there’s tons of religions in real life that have never had a big breakthrough, it’s reasonable to believe this could be something similar. That, or a creepypasta. Or a cult.

Light created this understanding that he had to be the one to change the world to cope with his murders. Actually - that might be the worst way to put it, since we know how strongly he feels about justice and being given an outlet to carry out this wish of world peace just enhanced this, but nonetheless... It’s impossible to assume he’s doing all of this without even a speck of guilt. Therefore, this is the first hint of appreciation or even just acknowledgement that what he’s doing is right. 

Disregarding the first point (as interesting as I find it), this is really the first time Light is ever told what he’s doing is good. His own father - who he idolizes -considers Kira evil. His sister flat out says she hates him. Of course, this is all after Kira actually does become popular, but still, all he receives from that point on is disapproval from the people he cares the most about. The online love for Kira is all he has.

So, yeah, he probably internalizes it.

He thinks he’s doing the right thing. He thinks he’s giving others justice. He thinks he’s the only one who can do this. Others agreeing is only enhancing this. They’re the ones who call him God.

As the story progresses, Kira’s power and popularity grows. He gains direct news coverage, people begin sending him names of people to kill, his following grows. So much so, that when someone gets a Death Note and figures out that must be what he’s using, their immediate response is to find a way to contact him.

Cue Misa Amane and Sakura TV.

Sakura TV is a news program known for its unreliability. Demegawa, the director, even says he’s willing to make things up for publicity. And that’s when the Second Kira tapes arrive. 

This, however, is only the first encounter with Sakura TV.

After this, the only direct involvement the police has with it is in the Yotsuba arc, when it’s used to lure out Higuchi. Otherwise the program promotes Kira all on its own, even going so far as to create Kira’s Kingdom - half a scam for viewers’ money, half a way to get more people to see Kira as God. And it works. He gains a following of people who believe he will create a new, better world, and will even give themselves up to help him. 

An example of this following is when a mob of followers attacks the SPK under Kira’s orders. They’re so quick to join in, and are even willing to put their names and faces on TV in trust that Kira will not kill them.

All of this publicity sparks fear in the general public. People begin fearing that if they do something wrong Kira will kill them, causing crime rates to drop nearly 70% over Kira’s 6 year reign, as well as completely stopping wars.

Demegawa is eventually killed. Other news programs begin scrambling to claim the voice of Kira, topped by NHN, where we are reintroduced to Kiyomi Takada as Kira’s spokeswoman as well as one of his greatest supporters.

Light, as much as he hates Sakura TV and NHN’s depictions of Kira, uses them to his advantage as much as he can.

But really, imagine what this is all doing to him.

At the beginning, he struggled with grasping what he was doing as right. His sense of justice, righteousness, and perfectness shattered by a single notebook. But this is perfect, he figures that if he really wants to fix the world, this is one surefire way to do it. And yeah, his family hates Kira, but online he’s worshiped as God. We already know he has a pretty decent ego, and all of this is doing nothing but fueling it.

To top it all off, as he continues with his killings, his following grows. More and more people begin to support him, every single day there’s news stations upon news stations covering his story, some negative, some positive. People from all over express admiration towards him, even the President of the United States sides with him. He is literally worshiped as Kira, as God.

This all makes it sounds like his god complex starts later in the series, so to clarify; no, he does not pick up the book with plans to become God, but the second people start fueling his ego, the more twisted his ideals and motivations become. He’s the only one who can fix this rotten world. He holds the power of a god in his hands, he does what only a god can do, and everyone treats him accordingly. He is Kira, he is God.

Between websites, news programs, and his cult-like following, Light had enough attention to feed into his ego for a lifetime. He was perfect pre-Death Note. Smart, charming, set for success. There never was a time where he was particularly not narcissistic, it was just that he only felt this way inside of himself. The way he presented to others? A perfect, cool guy persona with an - in all honesty - annoying prickly jerk hiding inside. But no one ever knew this, he never let them know, and because he was always naturally successful it was more of an expectation he just met rather than surpassed, so he wasn’t consistently praised and this incredible self-esteem wasn’t propped up by anyone but himself.

To cycle back to the title of this rant-essay-analysis-whatever you’d like to call it, I want to share some examples about exactly why I even classify this news coverage and whatnot of Kira as propaganda.

Kira’s supporters cause a riot at SPK HQ under Kira’s orders and Demegawa’s direction.

Mikami providing his insight as to why he supports Kira on television, openly promoting Kira and encouraging others to join him.

Takada announces her new role as Kira’s spokesperson on NHN.

Mikami uses his power as Kira to kill members of Kira’s Kingdom, supposed followers of Kira who have been using his publicity to gain money and attention.

Most of this doesn’t exactly look like your standard propaganda posters or news story, but it does fit the overall criteria;

Information from a biased viewpoint used to promote/publicize a certain view (accepting Kira as God)

Shows exclusively positive views on Kira

Assigns Kira positive adjectives and makes him appear as good (God, savior, messenger from Hell), never considering or showing the bad

Presenting only positive statistics (Light does this in his monologue where he brings up the 70% crime rate drop, and given there’s no way he could have calculated this on his own he likely got it from one of these media sources. Not that it’s incorrect, per se, but he does fail to mention how many innocent people he’s killed in order to do this.)

Appeals to regular, everyday people by talking about how he’s doing this for the betterment of the whole world. People who are directly affected by crime are also likely positively impacted by this.

Initiates and spreads fear by explaining how Kira only attacks those who do wrong.

In the end, Light’s personal descent into his god complex, as well as his effects on the world can be attributed to many things, but it would be a crime to ignore just how big of a role news and other types of media played in this without his direct input. To think, if Light had won and overtaken the police like he was going to, he’d have absolutely no problem stepping into his shoes as God. Everyone else already set the stage, he just had to get there first.

-

This is my first Death Note analysis, so please excuse any errors, I just watched the anime for the first time and am doing my best to piece together all of the plot and especially Light’s deep characterization the best I can. If I ever read the manga or find something new, chances are this will be updated. But as for now, it’s finally finished after a week or so of procrastinating. Thank you for reading if you got this far! <3

[male-reader-requests]

Dog Days Pt. 2

Pairings: Mirio Togata x Male!Reader

Word Count: 1,893

Warnings: Second installment! Slightly angsty I guess, I could not remember for the life of me where I was going with this considering it's been 2 months but you know, is what it is. It does have a very small bit of potential sexual harassment, so that's a warning there, but nothing actually happens!

-

Midoriya felt horrible. 

Mirio was still in the middle of his fight, fighting pretty playfully to tire out Tenya, but the green-haired male was hoping for him to finish faster. 

He'd been talking to himself, normal, and it had been about (M/N). Said male had gotten curious and came over to question him and Midoriya had freaked out. 

Really he hadn't meant to! He'd been so absorbed into his own world that he hadn't noticed that (M/N) had gotten so close until he'd tugged at his uniform!

Midoriya was still on the floor, laying down this time as he looked at the ceiling as if it was the thing causing all his problems. He had wanted to talk to (M/N), to understand his quirk a bit better, and get to know the tall male. (M/N) was dating Mirio, and Midoriya loved Mirio like a brother so he wanted to know his significant other. Then he'd gone and fucked up. 

Tilting his head a bit Midoriya could see that (M/N) was sitting in the corner of the room, relaxed against the wall with one knee propped up. He looked quite calm actually, but he was glaring harshly at the floor.

Midoriya had struggled with himself enough to recognize that (M/N) was beating himself up mentally, that he was replaying the encounter over and over again to see what he'd done wrong and could have done better, but there was nothing.

(M/N) had done nothing wrong, Midoriya was just jumpy and had reacted badly. 

Midoriya felt horrible and knew he should approach the other male and apologize, but he couldn't find the strength to drag himself up. What if (M/N) reacted badly to Midoriya approaching him? What if he didn't accept the apology and was pissed? Was he pissed?

Midoriya was working himself up, mumbling again. But before his own mumbling could get too loud he noticed someone else was mumbling. Not very many people had a habit like that in the class. Confused he looked over (M/N) to see if it was him, but he was just sitting against the wall with his chin against his chest, mouth and nose buried in his jacket collar.

Midoriya looked around a bit more, going from person to person only to find nothing. Confused he sat up, trying to get a better angle of everything, and this time he found purple in the form of Mineta. He was partially in the shadows, this stupid grin resting on his face, a stupid grin that Midoriya, unfortunately, knew very well.

The girls could all take care of themselves, Mineta was more or less just annoying, and the guys had all given up trying to reprimand him. Well, Tenya still tried but that was just part of his personality.

Mineta was currently eyeing up Jirou, who was still quite out of it due to (M/N)'s venom. It was of no surprise really that Mineta would go after her. (M/N) had explained to all of them beforehand that his venom in the small dose he used would make them sleepy and pliant, having a fuzzy memory of everything after it had worn off. So it was no surprise that Mineta was going after the one girl that wouldn't remember it very well. 

Midoriya moved to stand up, but out of the corner of his eyes he saw that (M/N) was slowly getting up. The tall male was leaning against the wall still, but he had his feet under him so he was crouched down, his eyes still closed. As Midoriya looked at him in curiosity he watched as those red eyes moved about, tracking something.

Belatedly he realized the taller male was tracking Mineta who had his back turned to (M/N). His face was against the wall, he looked relaxed, but Midoriya knew the signs of tensing muscles. 

He was moving slowly to stand up, close to the wall in a way you could only ever expect of a spider. 

Once he stood up completely (M/N) was terrifying. He was taller than everyone else in the class, and while only being dressed in jeans and a hoodie he looked almost like a villain. Is that why he'd freaked out earlier?

(M/N)'s hands were trailing on the wall as he walked forward, silent as a free hand stuffed into his hoodie pocket pulled out the gun he used for his venom. 

(M/M) was an all-over fighter, he could do short-range or long-range, but with long-range he couldn't use his venom which could incapacitate someone with one hit. With that in mind, the support class had made him a little gun he could load with his venom to use so he could inject it in a better way.

Midoriya looked around, looking to see if anyone else had noticed but everyone was watching Mirio and Tenya fight. He watched as (M/N) pulled the little vile that held the venom out, holding it against elongated canine teeth the collect the venom much like people do with snakes. 

It only took a second or two for the vile to fill up, for (M/N) to be standing right behind Mineta.

He crouched down, still towering over the purple male, but Mineta finally seemed to realize something was wrong. Midoriya watched as he shakily looked up, meeting a mass of red and (E/C) eyes looking down at him.

Mineta tried to scream, (M/N) clamping a hand over his mouth with a light shushing sound.

Midoriya looked around again, but everyone was ignoring what was happening. He seemed to be the only one who had noticed, the only one close enough to hear the two of them.

Two of (M/N)'s hands come out into Mineta's sight, one holding the gun, the other holding the vile. 

"You know what's in this?" he whispered, shaking the little vile of (F/C) venom. Mineta nodded erratically, trying to squirm out of (M/N)'s grip but was unable to move. 

"Then you know what would happen if I injected more than I should, right?" Mineta nodded again, tears almost coming to his eyes.

Midoriya went back to earlier this afternoon again, to when (M/N) had been explaining his abilities. His venom was always a set amount, half an ML mixed with some solution to be injected via needle darts from his gun. It caused exhaustion basically, zapping anyone hit of their energy.

He'd told them that he would only use more if absolutely necessary, mostly due to Bakugo saying he was more resilient than the rest of them, but had proceeded to tell them what would happen if he used more.

It was still safe between 1 and 3 ML, depending on the persons size and their health records, but once you got past that it got dangerous. He had a Neurotoxic Venom, the kind that was used to paralyze prey in actual spiders. 

He had explained that the general dose, besides the memory haze, would cause muscle spasms, cramps, twitching, sweating, drooling, and gooseflesh. As the dose got larger it would start to cause painful abdominal cramps, strange sensations, unstable blood pressure, and severe pain in the limbs.

Then, with a blush that rivaled Mina's hair, he had said in rare cases it could cause damage to Autonomic effects, such as temperature control, digestion, bladder control, and unfortunately sexual function. Basically, if he gave a bigger dose than safe he could cause any of the males to get a painful erection. He'd sighed after that, filling a little vile with his venom to show them all the color of it so they'd recognize it. 

Coming back to himself Midoriya's eyes focused again, looking to (M/N) and Mineta who had been talking softly. Or (M/N) had been talking with Mineta nodding along the best he could. 

(M/N) pulled back after a second or two of silence, putting the gun back in his pocket but keeping a firm hand over Mineta's mouth.

"Now I suggest you find a new hobby or you'll end up confused and dazed, not having any memory of the next 12 hours," (M/N) smiled lightly, head tilting a bit to the side, "You understand, right?"

Mineta nodded aggressively again, (M/N) smile getting larger before patting him on the back, standing up, and moving away from him. Midoriya watched Mineta for a second or two more before looking back to (M/N), flinching when he locked eyes with him.

(M/N) was just standing there, partially in the shadows staring at him. It was horrifying.

"(M/N)!" a voice called out, Mirio coming into the room with a shining smile.

Immediately all of the murderous intent left (M/N)'s system, a soft smile so different from the one a few minutes ago coming to his face. He looked exhausted, he had before but now even more so. 

Mirio came over, talking excitedly and waving his hands around, gently elbowing the taller male in the ribs as he laughed at something. (M/N) didn't say anything, just smiled and nodded, ruffling blond hair when he had to leave for his next fight.

Mirio's smile fell once (M/N) was out on the field, turning to look at Midoriya instead of his boyfriend through the glass.

"What happened?" he asked, face void of the happiness it had shown with seconds before. Now he just looked concerned, confused and concerned.

"I don't really know," Midoriya started, rubbing at the back of his neck as he looked at the ground. "I'd gotten lost in thought so he'd startled me when he tugged on my shirt and then he scared Mineta when he was creeping on Jirou.

Mirio sighed, looking back to the glass that protected them from the fight happening below. (M/N) was fighting Mina, the pink girl easy to spot against the mass of rubble around them. She was laughing, struggling to breath as she slapped her thighs. Mirio smiled lightly at that, (M/N) had said some dumb joke in order to distract her. Partial for the fight and partial for himself.

"Yeah that's (M/N)," he chuckled softly, watching as the young girl fell over, laughing so much she was crying with (M/N) frantically crouched over her, clearing panicking as if he'd done something wrong. "He's always nice to everyone, easily excitable but he's also pretty awkward."

Mirio then let out a slightly forced laugh, rubbing at the back of his neck. "He's also always been someone who acts, so if Mineta was being a creap then I can't really blame (M/N)." 

Midoriya nodded, watching as Mina struggled to get up, (M/N) helping her the best he could with their height difference.

Maybe he'd just caught (M/N) on a bad day? Hopefully, they could be friends, or at least get along.

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - “Rapunzel Knows Best!” ( A first half of S3 Recap)

So I decided to place the recap after Be Very Afraid for several reasons. For starters it’s where the season three hiatus took place. It’s also framed like a cliffhanger episode the same as The Great Tree and Queen for a Day; so while Cassandra’s Revenge is technically the midseason finale, Be Very Afraid functionally servers this narrative purpose better. Finally I want to keep the Cassandra heavy stuff contained in it’s own recap later same as I did for Varian’s arc in season one. 

Also keep in mind, everything I discussed in previous recaps still apply here. Nothings changed and you could argue that the issues I bring up now could have also apply to past seasons; they just happen to be at their worst here. 

Here are the past recaps 

To Filler or Not to Filler

Hey, What Ever Happened to That Varitas, Guy?

What Is the Point?

‘Whatta Twist’

And here are the episodes that’s covered in this recap

Rapunzel’s Return Part 1

Rapunzel’s Return Part 2

Return of the King 

Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf

The Lost Treasure of Herz Der Sonne

No Time Like the Past

Beginnings 

The King and Queen of Hearts

Day of the Animals 

Be Very Afraid 

Poorly Defined Conflicts 

I’m not just talking about Cassandra’s lack of goals here either, though that is a part of it. I mean in several episodes the central conflict isn’t laid out clearly enough before being resolved.  We flip from one set up to the next without ever resolving the first; like in Rapunzel’s Return when Cass and Varian fight for screen time or whenever Rapunzel is suppose to learn one lesson only for someone else to learn a completely different lesson in every other episode. And to this day I don’t know what Rapunzel and Feldspar’s subplot in Lost Treasure was suppose to be about. 

There’s also of course the ill-defined overall conflict; which at this point has become convoluted and nonsensical to the extreme, and will only grow more aggravatingly stupid as the season progresses. The main villains lack clear goals, their motivations don’t align with previously stated facts, and the actual interesting conflict involving the threat of the rocks and their destruction of people’s lives and homes is just shoved under the rug and forgotten about.  

There is no story without conflict. Having the conflict be all over the place is not only confusing but makes it harder for the audience to invest in what’s going on. 

Failed Narrative Promises 

Tying in with the above statement regarding conflicts, we have failed narrative promises. Rapunzel is repeatedly told to that she needs to learn something in several episodes only for her not to learn it at all. She either learns some unrelated ‘lesson’ that wasn’t established, (like in Rapunzel’s Return with her pervious goal about ‘opening up to others’ being switched out for a generic ‘responsibility’ lesson that at the last minute, where she doesn’t even do anything responsible,) or she winds up ‘teaching’ the opposite lesson to a different character thereby rewarding her for her bad behavior.   

And that’s just within the induvial episodes themselves; there’s also broken narrative promises through out the overall story arc; like...

no justice/redemption for Lady Caine, 

no acknowledgment that the Saporians are the victims of colonization

no conclusion regarding Corona’s murky past

no satisfying ending to Varian’s plot that sees everyone in involve grow

a poor copout of an explanation for Cassandra’s face/heel turn

The Dark Prince reveal going nowhere 

The Brotherhood being put on a bus 

King Frederic, or any royal, not being held accountable for their past actions 

Lance’s new found responsibilities just being thrown away for the tenth time 

The Disciples plot being being dropped 

next to nothing in season two winds up being relevant 

And Rapunzel, the protagonist of a coming of age story, fails to learn anything at all 

I could probably go on but you get the gist. Tangled is incredibly frustrating show to watch because doesn’t deliver what it promises. You’re not being clever by ‘subverting audiences expectations’ unless you can justify your narrative decisions with previous set up. Tangled is too lazy to build proper set ups so it’s ‘twists’ leave you wanting to punch things rather then impressing you. 

Character Assassinations 

Every single character in Tangled the Series gets thrown under a bus, driven off a cliff, and then allowed to drown in the ocean of their completely unaware self-congratulatory smugness.  

Rapunzel is turned into a bully

Cassandra is given the idiot ball to hold permanently 

The King and Queen are lobotomized

Quinin gets replaced by a robot  

The rest of the Brotherhood are pale shadows of what they could have been 

Edmund is transformed from tragic complex figure into a dumb jerkoff who abuses his kid for a laugh 

Zhan Tiri, once an ancient demon warlock, is reduced to a floating impotent ghost girl 

The Saporians become poor hipster parodies

Cap is put on a bus

Any villain who isn’t Cass is gets ignored

Lance is infantilized to the point of absurdity

Eugene becomes a doormat 

and poor Varian is forced to become a complacent victim to his abusers as oppose to being allowed to keeping his dignity 

I think the only person who escapes this mass murder of characterization is freaking Calliope, and she’s hasn’t even appeared yet! (Well okay her and Trevor, maybe) 

This all ties back into the poorly defined conflict and failed narrative promises. Rather than let the characters drive the story, they’ve become puppets to the plot, and plot is really stupid and forced, and circles back in on itself and is full of contradictions. 

Manipulating the Audience’s Empathy to Do the Work for the Writers  

The reason why the creators believe they can get away with such poor characterization and lazy writing is because they expect the audience to do all the heavy lifting for them.  

Cass isn’t given an on screen reason for what she does because they’re hoping her fans will just automatically excuse her because they like her/relate to her and not, you know, get mad at the writers for dumbing her down. And after all who doesn’t love the creator’s pet? Meanies! That’s who! 

No one calls out Rapunzel’s bullshit on screen, because if everyone likes her, then you, viewing audience, should too. Because if you have any sort of independent critical thinking abilities and a sense of right and wrong then clearly you’re ‘just a hater’. 

Everyone should just shut up and be satisfied that Varian is even on screen now and be grateful for the scraps that they get cause he’s not the real point of the show and according to Chris ‘Varian fans aren’t real fans’. Even though they make up most of his viewing audience. 

I could go on, but it’s just variations of the above. The writing in this series is very fond of gaslighting the audience and trying to trick them into justifying the absolute worst behaviors while desperately hoping they doesn’t noticed the continued downgrading and dismissal of characters they do like or once liked.  

And the sad thing is, it’s worked. There are people to this day that still try to justify this show’s shitty morals and bend over backwards to excuse the likes of Rapunzel, Frederic, Cassandra, and Edmund.  Worst, there are loud sections of the fandom, (usually on twitter) who think bullying is okay and follow in Chris and his characters footsteps. Most of them young impressionable girls who are now ripe for TREFS to indoctrinate because they use the same bullying tactics and excuses for authoritarianism. 

Media does effect reality, but not in the way purists and antis would have you believe. No one is going to become a violent manic from playing a video game nor a sex offender because they read a smut fic. But they very much will conform to toxic beliefs if it’s repeated enough at them by authorities they ‘trust’; like say the world wide leading company known for family entertainment and children’s media, and the ‘friends’ they find within the fandom for said company... 

I’m not saying you can’t enjoy Tangled the series or that you’re some how wrong for liking it’s characters, nor do you have to engage with every or any criticism thrown it’s way. But yes you need to think about the media you consume on some level and valid criticism is very much important to the fandom experience for precisely the above reasons. 

Conclusion    

This isn’t even the tip of the iceberg of what’s wrong with this show, but it is most of its biggest problems laid bare. Anything that haven’t covered here or in the past recaps will be explored in the final recap. Cause this is it folks; the last leg of the journey for this retrospective. When come back, hopefully next week, we’ll tackle Pascal’s Dragon.  

[wolf-pearl]

@aimeelouart I have finally finished writing the summary of that SSC au I mentioned on ao3.

This AU is based on the First's theories about Cloud. Basically, what if they were right with their assumptions? 

Zack is an early SOLDIER prototype and legendary 1st Class who got disappeared pre the Trio's time. His existence was completely erased. Zack was enhanced using only mako, no jenova cells. When the jenova cell infused mako treatment was found to result in greater enhancement than mako treatment alone, Zack was viewed as obsolete. 

Made obsolete by new j-cell SOLDIERS, combined with Hojo wanting to make way for Sephiroth to rise through the ranks, and fear that Zack's sway over the SOLDIERs would lead to mass insubordination in the event that Zack objected to ShinRa's immoral agendas became reasons for Zack to be disappeared and handed over to the science department. Zack was handed over to the science department by his own men, the betrayal resulting in his scorn for the SOLDIER program. 

Cloud was created to be a SOLDIER killer. President ShinRa, after seeing that there really wasn't any way to stop the SOLDIERs if they decided to turn against the company, orders Hojo to create some form of failsafe in the event that any SOLDIER turned against ShinRa. Cloud has been conditioned from day one to see SOLDIERs as highly dangerous combatants that will kill him if he can't neutralize them fast enough, and eliminating them is the job expected of him by Hojo and ShinRa. 

Zack was brought in at first to be Cloud's first real SOLDIER to kill. Problem was, Cloud was TINY at the time, and thus can't win that fight. Zack refuses to harm Cloud, because, you know, he's a literal child. So what was intended to be a fight to the death devolves into Zack giving Cloud pointers on his foot work and sword technique. Hojo sees the value in keeping Zack around to teach Cloud, as who's better to teach the boy how to fight SOLIDERs than an actual SOLDIER? On top of that, it has the added bonus of further instilling a distrust of SOLDIERS into Cloud. And so Hojo decides to keep Zack around for Cloud to practice fighting and to teach Cloud. (Don't be fooled, Hojo still absolutely plans on having Cloud kill Zack. He simply has moved that back as a potential final test before announcing Cloud as ready for deployment.) 

Cloud's actual name given to him by Hojo is Cumulonimbus. Upon hearing that, Zack declared that that was a terrible name for a kid, and started calling the boy Cloud instead. Cloud reacted poorly to the firsts calling him Cloud because that is Zack's name for him. Zack is the only person Cloud truly trusts, so the name Zack gave him is only for people he trusts. 

Cloud leveled his materia himself. They wanted him to have a full arsenal to take down rogue SOLDIERS. So, he's been using them since the moment he could. The fusion blade also belongs to Cloud. They put him through tests to see what all of his limit breaks are, and then designed the fusion sword to complement his final limit break, omnislash. 

Cloud was kept in the lab in Nibelheim. This meant that he was always in relative close proximity to Jenova. As such, Cloud has been subjected to Jenova's mind fuckery for his entire life. When Jenova first started reaching out to Cloud's mind it was simply to figure out what he was. Then she made Cloud's life hell. Cloud had to learn quickly how to block her out. This is why Cloud knows all the tricks to blocking out the crazy alien. This also means that Cloud has been getting visions of the future for most of his life.

Cloud wasn't meant to ever be in view of the public, or interact with civilians at all. The only people he was planned to interact with were his handlers and the SOLDIERS he was sent to eliminate. As such, there was no need to condition him to behave, hold his tongue, or be a poster boy like Sephiroth. The only behavior that mattered was following direct orders and returning to his handlers once his objective is complete.

Cloud recognizes the Buster sword because it used to be Zack's sword. It wasn't taken away from Zack when he was first brought in as they had intended to throw him into combat. After that he was allowed to keep it in order to further Cloud's lessons with him. Cloud knows how to tend to the Buster sword so expertly because he did so relatively often back in the labs. The scientists learned to use promises of extra time with Zack as an incentive for Cloud, and much of those bonus times were spent talking with Zack as they cared for the sword. Eventually the buster sword gets taken away from Zack as punishment for "bad behavior" - probably an escape attempt or attempting to interfere with one of the inhumane tests Cloud is put through. Zack assumes that it was melted down after being taken away. In reality, the Buster sword is given to Angeal. One of the last SOLDERS who served under, remembers, and still holds loyalty to Zack was the one who delivered the Blade to Angeal. The SOLDIER tells Angeal that the Buster Sword belonged to an honorable man who had no one to pass it onto, and that Angeal's dedication to dreams and honor reminded the SOLDIER of that man. Angeal was never told the name of the blade's original wielder.

Ribbon belonged to Zack. He had hid it from the scientists. Zack first gave it to Cloud after a nasty round of experiments involving status conditions. He had somehow braided it into Cloud’s hair. He gave it to Cloud permanently after the boy had clung to it like a security blanket. Knowing that the Ribbon was probably the first object that Cloud ever used as a security blanket, Zack vows that once they escape he will get Cloud an actual plushie. With ribbons of its own. 

During a time when Hojo is back in midgar, Zack breaks out of his cell, snags Cloud, and makes a break for it. They end up being forced to barricade themselves into a chamber that has a bunch of coffins. They find Vincent who takes one look at Cloud and decides that his sins can wait, there is a child right here who needs his help and he can help. Vincent and Zack tear through the scientists that are on site and scavenge what travel essentials they can from the lab along with the equipment that was made for Cloud, before making their escape with Cloud.

Somehow Cloud gets separated from Zack and Vincent, and decides to set out to destroy Jenova and burn the mansion to the ground. At this point Hojo is aware that something has gone wrong, and so Genesis is sent to Nibelheim, ostensibly to check an energy disturbance in the area. In reality he's been sent to retrieve Cloud, but he isn't told that. 

The outfit the Firsts find Cloud in is part of Zack’s old uniform. Cloud was pretty much only given hospital gowns and scrubs to wear by the scientists. When Zack and Cloud escaped Cloud’s clothes - which were nothing more than a hospital gown and scrub pants - got completely ruined. Zack wrapped Cloud up in his own outfit because while Zack was able to find extra clothes that fit himself in the lab, there wasn’t any kid clothes in the lab. Cloud ends up in Zack’s sleeveless turtleneck and pants, but Zack keeps the pieces that wouldn’t do Cloud any good for himself. This does mean that the outfit Cloud is wearing at the start is a little different than in ssc. Zack is smart enough to know that putting his massive steel toed boots on a small child is not going to do Cloud any good. So when Genesis finds Cloud the boy is not in a complete comically oversized ensemble with that skirt thing, the single shirtless sleeve, belts and all. Instead Gen finds a small bare foot child wearing a quarter turtleneck that's falling off his shoulders, a pair of already baggy pants that look like ufo pants on the kid, and a sword harness with an absolutely obnoxiously big sword. (Gen has a freak out when he sees Cloud standing in knee high snow without any footwear, because seriously how long has this kid been wandering around in below freezing temperatures barefoot, he could lose his toes.)

How did Cloud even get separated from Zack and Vincent, and how did he make his way back to Nibelheim from wherever they had fled to? Simple: don't ask me questions I don't have an explanation for yet.

Zack and Vincent are desperately trying to find Cloud. The First Class trio don't realize that they are being hunted down by two very protective, skilled, and enhanced individuals who are hell bent on getting Cloud back.

Because this AU removes (most of) the time travel aspects, Cloud’s reasons for being afraid of Sephiroth are different. One cause of Cloud’s fear of Sephiroth is that Cloud has been having nightmares and visions of the future for basically as long as he can remember. On top of this, Cloud also has been conditioned to think that the greatest threat he might ever have to fight is Sephiroth, as he’s the top SOLDIER. Hojo drove this point home by forcing Cloud to fight simulations of Sephiroth, and would punish Cloud if he failed to beat it. Hojo also constantly forced Cloud through intense experiments and enhancements to “bring his capabilities up to be equivalent to Sephiroth”, inadvertently causing Cloud to associate any mention of Sephiroth and/or Sephiroth’s continued improvement with being subjected to another barrage of experiments. However, Cloud probably won't be as afraid of Sephiroth in this AU as he is in SSC. Yes Cloud would still be afraid of Sephiroth, and yes Cloud would still be more afraid of Seph than he is of Genesis or Angeal. However without the time travel aspect from the original fic, Cloud just won’t have enough reason to be as afraid of Sephiroth as he is in ssc. In this AU Cloud’s more afraid of what Sephiroth represents (the visions of the future, the ultimate threat Cloud may have to face, and further experimentation) than he is of Sephiroth as a person.

Sephiroth could earn Cloud's trust through showing Cloud that Hojo had hurt him too. Sephiroth understands what it means to be hurt by Hojo. 

You still want time travel elements? Well you’re in luck because I have three options for that.

1) Cloud time traveled version 1: In the first time line, he escaped with Zack, but Zack ultimately got killed. Cloud takes Zack’s outfit to remember him by, and stays out of the reach of ShinRa, builds a life for himself as a mercenary. At some point during the years during mercenary work Cloud stumbles upon the Buster sword on a cliff in the midgar wastes. As Angeal had no protegee, he had neither a student to order to cut him down or anyone to pass the Buster sword onto. Angeal died while leaning against the flat of the blade that he had struck into the earth in an attempt to keep himself propped up. Cloud recognizes the Buster sword and takes it with him. He doesn’t learn how the Buster got on the cliff after it was taken from Zack. Cloud spends his years as a mercenary drifting to wherever his jobs take him, and for the most part ignoring the events that shake ShinRa such as the Nibelheim incident and the mass defections. He stays far away from anything to do with ShinRa up until he takes a job from AVALANCHE. From there Cloud follows an altered version of cannon events. When Cloud time traveled, he got sent back to when he was a kid in the labs with Zack, the only things he brought back from the future are his rare summon materia as well as his Master Materia, those really being the main equipment he got after the labs. This would mean Cloud being small doesn’t necessarily have to be because of Jenova.

2) Cloud time traveled version 2: Zack escapes with Cloud pre crisis core, but ultimately gets apprehended by Sephiroth, who was sent to recapture “escaped experiments”. Sephiroth kills Zack, and Cloud is returned to Hojo (this gives an alternate reason behind Cloud calling Sephiroth “murderer” in chapter 3). Cloud continues to be experimented on and is sent on his first mission during the events of crisis core to go after the SOLDIERs who defected with Genesis. Cloud is eventually sent after and successfully takes down Genesis and Angeal. Cloud doesn’t recognize them after time traveling at first due to how advanced their degradation was when he fought them on top of his memories of that time in his life being unclear. Cloud does recognize that the sword Angeal has is the Buster sword and takes it with him. All Sephiroth learns about the deaths of his friends is that they were taken down by “a classified project designed for this exact type of scenario”. When the Nibelheim incident occurs, Sephiroth was sent with a random SOLDIER first. Cloud was sent to investigate to see if the accompanying first went rogue after the team sent to Nibelheim fails to report in and ShinRa hears of a disturbance in the area. Cloud arrives to find the village burning and the unnamed First (along with everyone else) killed by Sephiroth. Following orders to eliminate any rogue SOLDEIRs along with recognizing Sephiroth as the person who killed Zack, Cloud kills the silver General. Hojo is furious when he arrives, demanding why Cloud would kill Sephiroth, to which Cloud retorts that he followed his orders as given to him by ShinRa and the Professor himself. His orders were to eliminate any rogue SOLDEIRs, and Sephiroth had gone rogue. Hojo takes offence to this, and as punishment he tries to experiment Cloud into oblivion for 4 years. Hojo leaves Cloud in a mako tank after the creations of the Sephiroth clones, and he reasons once Sephiroth returns there will be no more need for Cloud. Cloud escapes, equipping himself with his gear from his time as ShinRa’s SOLDIER killer but opts to wear Zack’s outfit that was kept in the lab’s storage after his death. Cloud makes his way to midgar where he joins up with AVALANCHE, and from there the story follows along an altered version of the cannon events. As a side note, I’m not entirely sure how this one would work out with the time line and character ages, so this one may require some fudging of the characters ages to make sense? Idk, I really don’t understand the timeline of FF7. I think that using Cloud’s canon age would make him 14 maybe 15 when he takes down Genesis and Angeal. Considering that Hojo sent Sephiroth to Wutai at around the same age, it could work. 

3) Zack is the time traveler. In the original timeline, Zack doesn’t manage to escape the labs and ends up dying before Cloud gets to see. Zack ends up following Cloud around as a ghost and is powerless to do anything as Cloud struggles through his time as ShinRa’s SOLDIER killer, and then dealing with the events of meteor fall, geostigma, etc. the Planet ultimately cant recover, so it Sends Zack back in time to prevent the disasters from ever happening. Zack is sent back to early on in his time with Cloud in the Labs. Zack makes a point of reiterating how dangerous Sephiroth is to Cloud, and this time succeeds in escaping the labs with Cloud by enlisting Vincent’s help (Zack learned of Vincent through waiting over Cloud as a ghost). While Zack was sent back in time to save the planet, He acknowledges to himself that his real motivation behind doing this isn’t to be a hero, he just wants to take care of his Cloudy. Zack absolutely freaks out when he gets separated from Cloud. He’s on a warpath to get his adoptive son back. When Zack catches up to the three Firsts Cloud’s probably going to have to talk Zack down from outright eviscerating them for daring to touch Cloud. 

[lexpressobean]

Thoughts on Kikaichu as actual Parasites.

Knowing how skin and the body generally works on a medical level, the "hive" aspect of the Aburame clan really drives me crazy. 'Cause parasites are real, obviously, but the size of Kikaichu beetles makes absolutely no sense in comparison to irl skin parasites. At least not in a bee hive sort of way lol

rambling because my mind craves logic and I'm specializing as a wound care nurse but it's literally anime so what do I expect lol

No, wounds don't freak me out, I'm more terrified of generally handling vomit and babies than I am a dehiscence of a 15cm long surgical site lol. The human body can literally take so much abuse before it really starts to give and try to alert you that you need help! And once you give it help, it really can come full circle to the wound 100% looking like it was never there. The body is an amazing thing <3

However the first thing that comes to mind when I hear the word "parasite" is always going to be "tapeworm". That's not gonna change. However, kikaichu are not worms and CERTAINLY don't grow that fucking huge or live that long. (A tape worm can live long enough to graduate with a fucking PhD. Can you believe?) I haven't been exposed to any urgent situations involving parasites yet, however, the one I would compare a Kikaichu to that is (unfortunately) also common is the scabies mite.

Very briefly, scabies mites (Sarcoptes scabiei) are technically a type of arachnid that grow no bigger than a bout 0.5mm in size, but CAN be seen with the naked eye if you're looking for them. They crawl around the skin and burrow specifically in the top layer of skin, called the epidermis. The epidermis is that protective layer of skin and can be between 0.5mm to 1.5mm thick depending on which part of the body you're looking at. After the epidermis, you have the dermal layer, which is where sweat glands, nerves, and capillaries are found. Scabie mites will not burrow that deep because they only burrow to lay their eggs and such. As they do this they can cause visible tunnels and other marks that can be mistaken for acne or other skin conditions if not properly identified. You'll most likely know because the itch is VERY BAD.

They're very easily spread by close contact and a scabies infestation needs to be treated with a prescribed pharmacological means.

However, kikaichu are definitely a lot bigger than 0.5mm. In the case of size, I would compare them at minimum to fruitflies/medflies, which grow up to 3-5mm and maximum to ladybugs 4-7mm.

3-7mm > 0.5-1.5mm... obviously. And the holes which Kikaichu swarm out of that the audience has seen before are about a size comparable Shino's nostrils, IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!!

You're telling me those things were in his mouth?????????? S H I N O N O

That would mean, in realistic terms, the Kikaichu are fucking around in Shino's body to the bone and muscles and THAT'S A REALLY SCARY THOUGHT. Even just passing the epidermis to the dermis is alarming! Compared to the dry, protective epidermis that can and does take damage, the dermis can be 1-4mm thick depending on where you're looking and is where skin does it's business. All together that becomes 0.5-5.5mm of space BARELY big enough for a fruit fly do mess around in. It makes just enough sense in terms of THAT size, but last time I checked, having the skin penetrated to the dermal layer is just asking for infection to happen. You're first natural line of defense has been breeched, there's a pretty good chance you're gonna be bleeding (blood vessels) and general body fluids are going to be draining, which is bad for a multitude of reasons, and there's damage that gonna affect the nerves, and realistically this shit is going to be ABSOLUTELY painful if they're constantly manipulating those areas near nerves. These kinda of things CAN make new connections and things like that, sometimes damage is forever. (Case by case basis).

So my first thought to more or less "magically" solve the problem with anime logic, is that first of all, it's an anime and logic doesn't have to apply haha.

On a more sci-fi level, in which kikaichu are smaller than we've seen them shown, maybe they have been purposefully been allowed to burrow into the dermal layer of the skin at least because the blood vessels seem to be in direct contact with the chakra system. Kikaichu's prefered food is chakra, but they WILL mutiny and eat their respective Aburame from the inside out if they don't balance their chakra smartly. So it's safe to say Kikaichu are at least carnivorous as well, and so I only imagine these absolute nightmares would swarm their prey in the wild, and actively bite through and burrow into the body of the prey until they found the chakra system and went to town on that poor unfortunate soul. Eaten alive, how the hell did they "tame" them in the first friggin' place??

I like to think two things:

1) Kikaichu are passed down from parent to child, and the parent has control over the Kikaichu until they have been RIGOROUSLY trained for generations to comprehend that this baby/child isn't food, it's a new hive. If bees can comprehend time, Kikaichu can comprehend what an Aburame is. If they insist on trying to drain the babe or the babe just can't tolerate them, the parent takes the Kikaichu back and the babe is assigned another insect or position in general. Like hell they're gonna try to force a relationship like that.

2) As part of the successful symbiotic relationship, Kikaichu regularly debride the tunnels and borrows that they carve into their respective Aburame, and are naturally intuitive in avoiding as many nerves and blood vessels as possible. The chance of infection is never 0%, however, kikaichu are pretty good about taking care of their tunnels, and so it gives the Aburame more time to focus on their things, like increasing the amount if chakra in their system. To ensure that they stay healthy, Aburame are encouraged to eat as much protein and Vit C possible every day, whether it be meat, beans, lentils, eggs, oranges, tomatoes, or even supplements as times modernize. The dermis is living tissue and as long as debridement/tunneling is going on, it needs to be nourished as much as possible.

I don't know how the hell Aburame deal with the obvious drainage that would be coming from their bodies, assuming the dermal layer really is free game for the Kikaichu. But the magical solution is that... they don't? Because... drainage is minimal. The Kikaichu just do such a good job lol. Maybe they purposefully... carve entrances to be flappy, or they purposefully create pocket spaces underneath seemingly healed areas of skin to easily burst open when necessary. That's the biggest thing for me, leaking body fluids. There's no way around that shit besides straight up denial lol Maybe they wear a special kind of dressing underneath their clothes, or that's directly applied with their clothes. Maybe that's what that cute little backpack is filled with, who knows!!

Idk man. I'm sure the Aburame authority forces encourages many of their non-hive members to pursue medical nin training in order to give the clan more privacy in general too. All medics that claim the Aburame name are exclusively used by the Aburame Clan. A non-Aburame medic may end up healing tunnels and burrows that were meant to stay open because "oops" and now you have an X amount of insects possibly suffocating within a completely sealed pocket of the skin, and also now there's a very good chance that after those insects die, that whole area is gonna frickin' abscess and cause infection induced tunnels the longer it's left alone and GROSS THAT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN! THERE IS A DELICATE, ORGANIZED, SELF-SUFFICENT PROCESS TO ALL THIS!! A PROCESS!!!

Like... the other ninja in the NartVerse can make as many jokes, jabs, and comments about the Aburame as they please (INO? BITCH??? but to be honest I still love her lol). But these MFers are constantly playing Russian Roulette with these high maintenance demon spawn from hell, and there are VERY little defences against Kikaichu, virtually none. Like the only thing I've ever seen actively thwart Kikaichu across all media is killing them with mass fire, countering them with large amounts of poison gas (both very exterminator like) or literally just feeding them chakra until they're so stupid full, they can't move, the little gluttons. As far as genjutsu, it's been stated that it's both effective and ineffective, so idk about that. But the Aburame are just SO set up to be the living breathing embodiment of Shinobi as defined by the NartVerse. They're whole clan culture relies on the threat of enemies. If they have no enemies, the whole relationship is an exhausting endeavor for literally no reason. It's not worth it if there's no one to fight or protect! But when there is a threat, you want them on YOUR side.

I suppose the best bet is to incapacitate the Aburame individual asap and the Kikaichu will tend the individual, making escape easier. But, if you DID manage to kill that Aburame right away, that particular Aburame's swarm is now suddenly without its food source and without restraint.

What do you THINK is gonna happen, bro?? The second an Aburame loses their grip on their consciousness due to external influences, the bugs go bonkers because I'm pretty sure Kikaichu are simply persuaded to be in this relationship and have NO tolerance for bullshit like alcohol and overheating temps. If their Aburame dies, they probably cause just as much chaos as they would as a wild, unattended swarm. Then YOU BETTER HAVE fire or poison gas or SOMETHING handy. The only way to calm them down is to offer them chakra and a new host with equal or even more chakra reserves. Otherwise the mutineers must be eradicated.

And for serious... Like, any deeper and the kikaichu would be in the hypodermal/subcutaneous layer of the skin and that's where a lot of connective tissue is located. Let's NOT mess with that shit, shall we? NOT a good idea. It's called connective tissue for a reason first and foremost...

[batarangsoundsdumb]

yet another ask dump yeehaw!

do you ever think that jay's mother was one of those bitch who believes in horoscope and tarots and things like that and so he believes in these things too, or it is just me projecting?

sheila haywood took one look at jason's birthchart said 'nah this won't do' and left.

Wait, but what happens when the justice league does find out that Bruce and John fucked? Lmao it sounds like it would be hilarious, really, I don’t want a justice league that doesn’t make fun of Bruce for like his entire life.

barry runs out of the meeting immediately and comes back with an entire sti testing kit. diana fully seriously wants bruce to get tested while bruce is sitting there like 'come on guys, you're being ridiculous, i already checked twice'

john is standing in the corner clearly offended while bruce is just like 'don't even say anything, constantine, you fucked a shark'

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

on the one hand, good for him, on the other hand, bro, how do you still have a secret identity when your superhero name is just your last name,,,,

Your fic on ao3 was GOLD PLEASE CONTINUE I loved Dinah's cameo btw ( @purple-vixen

thanks so much! i already continued but this ask is like 10 years old because i'm a notorious procrastinator (also yes! i love dinah so much aahhhhhhhhhhhh)

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

bruce internally: holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit bruce externally: get out of my city, alien

AHHH ur multimedia fic is the only thing that brings me happiness anymore continue it forever pls

uhh thanks, but can't continue it forever because my attention span is that of a toddler on crack on a good day and i can't function without at least 10 things going on at the same time and music in the background

Oi, so I'm getting into dc and watching batman the animated series, and they use fruitcake a lot. Which I thought was very funny and wanted to share w you - Denilla

wait like fruitcake (food) or fruitcake (derogatory) ?

young justice 🤝 teen titans slut shaming batman

tim drake and dick grayson to their respective teams 'you guys stop it, that's my dad'

Happyhoganon: If an eighty year old Batman had fought crime in Gotham City for decades and the only threats to him and the city lately are a wheel chair bounded Penguin, your usual purse snatchers and a few con artists popping up every now and then, how well could the Dark Knight do in maintaining the peace in Gotham despite him being just somewhat fit to do that as an elderly man (which says A LOT given how old he is)

uhh he'll probably do what my grandpa does and that is ruthlessly prank them until they die of shame.

in the death in the family interactive movie there's an ending where Jason is tasked with raising Damian and he decides he's gonna raise Damian to take down the waynes and al ghuls which uh maybe isn't great BUT the idea of Jason raising Damian... PRICELESS. CHAOTIC. I just need more people to know about this :)

yes i saw that wow holy shit but jason would accidentally drop damian on his head one (1) hour in and jason just yeets him into the lazarus pit.

Headcanon: The Penguin has a really hard time fighting any of the Robins because of his avian obsession means there's always a small part of his mind that's like "Birb. Child. Protect" ( @subspacecadet )

as soon as dick becomes nightwing the penguin is like 'you know what, fuck this dude' and shoots at him.

Y'all talking about King Shark dating Constantine, let's not forget about John literally hooking up with Satan

listen there's a clear difference between monsterfucker and satanfucker in that king shark is literally a shark and satan still looks like a normal dude

Does everyone in Gotham think Batman is a teen dad?

everyone in gotham thinks batman has been around since gotham was founded, but they do think that bruce wayne is actually a teen father and dick grayson's biological dad.

why. why would you do that fancast when you know it will only hurt people

what? i loved my fancast it was really well done. i did it with good representation in mind and i really managed that with alfred pennyworth being ✨italian✨

Seeing james charles a jason gave me psychic damage how dare you i need to wash my eyes

well that's a you problem isn't it?

do you think dick grayson thirst tweets about nightwing just to annoy his family/cause problems on purpose in general?

he thinks nightwing is hot, next question.

holy jiminy cricket batman, its as cold as the good lords ass crack in here!!

i- what? this is why i don't fuck with english expressions it's way too goddamn weird

Brooooooo, your teen dad!Bruce au is soooo good. I've got brainrot.

Honestly if you ever write anymore, I'd read that shit twice. Sign me the fuck up. Good stuff, Good Stuff.

uh yeah i'm thinking about writing a fic, but i have exams coming up and i don't wanna fail because that would suck. but after i'll certainly be writing more tho

your teen dad AU is so great! bruce acting like a big brother for all of like a week before he's telling everyone about his son. what if in the AU dick meets the JL because they need to rescue him? maybe he's in trouble/kidnapped at a gala and bruce starts calling for JL. clark finds him and has to fly with dick to bring him home - that's how dick and clark meet and superman becomes dick's fave hero. he goes around the manor thinking he can fly with a red blanket draped around him like a cape.

actually- if you want a young dad! bruce fic with like that kinda stuff(just with damian) go check uhh- in for a penny by cdelphiki. it's really good and bruce is like 24/25-ish. (and dick's there!!!)

This account has solely convinced me that Tim is a trash goblin ( @hamilcat-and-magic-turtle )

because he is. that boy has slept in dumpsters on multiple occasions even if he is the son of a billionaire.

Okay but when you said victory dance I did think of the whole justice league defeating the big bad and then they all start flossing

well that's exactly what hal jordan does and that's why batman uses a gun now. no but the victory dance in my opinion is like the 'we're all in this together' dance from high school musical.

The horrors in Invincible s1 was nothing compared to the comics, I cant wait for s2

oh well okay, i mean i personally react to horror and violence by laughing awkwardly so i can't wait to be called a monster for accidentally laughing at a mass murder.

I'm currently watching Batman: The Brave and The Bold and- Bruce is just talking about Oliver like he's an old love (@nightwings-kid)

okay im going to watch that lmao that's totally and completely in character for him tho.

The invincible comic is like super gratuitous with its violence so much so I'm shocked the show was able to adapt it in a faithful way! Anyway had the show been live action it absolutely wouldn't have the same impact as it does as an animated show and I'm so glad so many people agree with me on that

also because a live action casting would've been like uhh amanda stenberg for amber, the dude- the guy from the supernatural but with a mustache for omni-man, and scarlet johanssen for debbie grayson

Debbie grayson is a milf, yes. You're welcome for the invincible propoganda, now you can questions your life. Bruce def seems like the perfect father next to Omni-man. Like they really took a rip off justice league and I was like well, now I'm attached even tho I was like hah I know who they're supposed to be. And then bam- death gore death gore gore gore sad Mark grayson just had to have daddy issues. Why does every character have daddy issues. I'm sick of the attacks

because daddy issues make a person arguably funnier, that's why i'm not even remotely funny (haha good dad flex). i liked that it was dark contextually, but not in the colouring, bc i hate when it's like 'uh yeah graphic murder and now a shot so dark you have to sit in a dark room and squint at the screen to faintly see the characters. (like dcau ugh)

About the Wayne insurance, for a moment I thought you would put the video with moans over the waves.

i mean- i could've done that, but rick rolling seemed more family friendly.

Its the first time in forever that im surpise rickrolled, i usually expect it. Congratulations (i really should know better this is tumblr)

i get rickrolled so often but i actually like the song so i dont really give a fuck

Actually, my information about Damian and John's kids is outdated because it was revealed that the old men telling the kids stories about the Supersons were actually Jon and Damian the whole time. I was blinded by my thirst for Grandpa!Bruce Wayne but I was wrong... I liked my version better, tbh (@artemisa97)

fair enough. but i'd honestly like to see damian and jon getting together, just because it's a really fun dynamic and their friendship was really cute when they were kids. (also idk maybe it would be nice to have one (1) main batfam/superfam character that's not cishet)

How am i JUST finding your blog skdskfkd you're so fucking funny and ur takes are hot

i thought u were calling me hot :( but youre not :( crime detected (but lmao thanks)

So I have depression and I swear that your memes are one of the few things that have made me laugh so thank you 💛🥺 (@katekanebadass)

aw you're welcome, and i hope you're doing okay!

The metropolis memes are so funny, I love them 💀😌

i think metropolis is also so fucking funny it deserves more attention imagine having your entire police force being upstaged by an alien from kansas and his kids

as an american i feel your complete lack of knowledge of us geography is just so sexy (platonic) ❤️

thanks so much (i also don't know any other geography, i'm not kidding, like you can tell me you're from hungary and it will just blank, there will be nothing that comes to mind)

In the DC universe they don't say "Can't have shit in Detroit" they say "Can't have shit in Gotham"

this just reminds me of that guy whose porch got stolen like the steps to his door, and i'm thinking of people living in gotham and waking up without a front door and going "can't have shit in gotham"

honestly all i know about chicago is the bean, so. what would gotham's famous sculpture be?

gigantic gargoyle statue in front of one of the police precincts because a villain thought it was a smart way to keep the police inside, but it's too heavy to move.

why tf do people go on about how batman "works alone" or how he's the "lone wolf" when he like 38290202 members in his family

bc people think it's cool that a grown man in his 30s has no friends or family instead of calling it what it is (sad)

Bruce is gotham's sugar daddy

why would say something so controversial yet so brave.

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

dick: gerard way are you in position, gerard way are you in position

tim: for the last fucking time, my codename is 'totally not count olaf' this week, abbafan 3000

dick: shut up my codename isn't 'abbafan 3000'

dick: it's 'abbafan number 1' and you know it

I have a feeling Tim drake is ur favourite batfamily member but okay u don't have favs if u say so ok

i mean he is, i won't deny it. but i love each and every one of the batfam just the same, i just have a weak spot for short dumbass nerds, because i'm a short dumbass nerd.

Omg i fuckin love boy meets world too fam shsjkfk

bro boy meets world was the shit!!! it was just fire and awesome and so fucking great like bro. it was so good im not even going to be accepting criticism

you know I find the whole "joker completes batman" thing a bit disgusting considering the horrendous stuff the batfamily went through because of the joker and let's not get started on the "joker has a point" thing like yeah he's this cool complex villain but he's absolutely batshit crazy

like yes! i get what you mean the joker just fucking sucks man he doesn't do shit for batman's character or the batfam he's literally just annoying as fuck. like the joker has a point' shit is so stupid. i will accept 'magneto was right' because he fucking was and i think he didn't do anything wrong, but joker? he's just like that. he's not even cool and complex he's just a weirdo with a bleach kink at this point.

ALSO YOUR RACISM POST- SO TRUE BESTIE

thanks bestie, i'm glad you agree.

in today's essay of why I think cass should become batman- I was thinking Tim would probably be the most efficient batman in many ways but I also think he wouldn't want to be batman tbh none of the batfamily members would want to be batman because they're trying to outgrow him but cass is the one who wants to represent the symbol that is batman

absofuckinglutely i will say it again and again that cass represents the batsymbol more than anyone in the batfam, in batgirl (2000) she literally didn't care about anything else than bruce's oath to not kill, she thought the batsymbol was more important than anything in gotham. she's just an excellent character because her motivation to not kill is not 'i'm scared i can't come back from it' or 'well my dad says no murder so i'll go along with it' but that she's killed somebody as a young child and she never wants to kill a human ever again and that's so fucking beautiful for a new batman like yes.

need more cass, duke and tim inclusion in gothamite memes

yes yes, a tall order of cass, duke and tim coming up in 1-14 business days

oldest to youngest batfam members cus I'm confused as shit

okay order of being taken in: dick, jason, tim, cass, damian, duke order of age: alfred, bruce, dick, cass, jason, tim, duke, damian (though cass and jason are around the same age general consensus is that cass is a little older)

I'm so confused Steph is a redhead?? like how was it that hard to get this right? the source material is literally right there and free

cw is jared, 19

do you receive anon hate? if so, how do you deal with it

uh no, i'm not remotely popular enough to get anon hate and i also don't say a lot of things that would attract anon hate, but i do send anon hate to @the-real-peter-parker because he forgot about the specialists from winx club

Wait how many languages do you speak??

uhh- 5 if you include latin, but that's a dead language and i'm really bad at it. but english, my native language, german, and french also, tho german and french not fluently.

You can mix aguaepanela with aguardiente 😈 and is tasty

okay but now i'm curious if the liquor deserves the 😈 emoji or if that's a you problem. but i googled it and it looks like something you'd take one sip of and then not remember the rest of your evening.