#but not publicly

[secondbeatsongs]

Triggers teats

happy halloween! have some konpeito!

[lokislytherin]

NOW I SEE DAYLIGHT (and i can never walk away)

tags: lookism, jaeseok, alpha!jay x beta!dan, older dan, falling in love, pining, crush, childhood friends, age gap, heat/rut, obsessed younger top oblivious older bottom

summary:

"kitae-yah, your little brother's name is jaeyeol, right?"

jaeyeol gazes up at the boy his older brother had brought home, the boy looking down at him with a sunshine smile and rosy cheeks.

"jaeyeol-ah, you're so cute!"

at the tender age of five, hong jaeyeol falls in love.

a/n: i haven't posted any actual writing here in a long time and i need to transfer this from my work notes app to my private computer acc and what other way to do that than tossing all of it here? anyway enjoy!

on the third of october, hong kitae turns eleven, and for the first time, with his father's permission, he hosts a birthday party. he brings all his closest friends over - jang udong, baek hangyeol, lee jihoon, and his best friend, park hyungseok.

jaeyeol peeks out of his room, curious, but too scared to even walk over to say hello. "that's my little brother," kitae-hyung says, pointing to jaeyeol, "we can just leave him. he can entertain himself."

most of the boys offer him polite nods, except lee jihoon, who squints at him suspiciously, and park hyungseok, who waves with a bright smile that makes jaeyeol feel all warm and tingly inside.

jaeyeol retreats into his room and slams the door shut. the warmth inside him makes him feel like he'd just drank hot chocolate, but his throat is dry. he's not entirely sure what's going on, but he's scared, he doesn't like it.

he reads quietly as the older boys play rambunctiously outside in the living room. he reads through two books, gets bored, and just sits there by the windowside, watching the birds chirp.

he jumps when kitae-hyung kicks the door open. "you want cake?"

what cake?

"chocolate, you know it's my favorite."

here's a secret - jaeyeol doesn't really like chocolate. but he likes his brother, who is his closest friend, so he nods.

kitae-hyung lets jaeyeol sit with his friends, and jaeyeol sits himself down criss-cross-apple-sauce on the couch next to park hyungseok. hyungseok is on the chubbier side, unlike jaeyeol who's always been told to eat more because he's too thin, but he has kind eyes behind his thick glasses. he's already halfway through his cake, savouring it with a blissful smile.

"he's already so fat, he doesn't need the bigger slice," complains seongeun. 

jaeyeol glares at him as hard as he can through his bangs.

"what can i say," murmurs hyungseok, a little bit sadly, "i like cake, but it's expensive, so i don't get to eat it a lot."

when seongeun walks past to get a tissue, jaeyeol kicks him and makes it look like an accident.

kitae-hyung gives jaeyeol a little slice of cake to eat. there are no chocolate shavings, unlike everybody else's. jaeyeol is surprised - he didn't think kitae knew he didn't like chocolate. most of the time, kitae-hyung acts like jaeyeol is an annoying little bug that found its way into his house.

jaeyeol eats in careful little nibbles. he doesn't want to embarrass himself in front of his brother's friends, after all, even if they're too noisy and some of them are a bit mean.

"kitae-yah, your little brother's name is jaeyeol, right?"

jaeyeol gazes up at hyungseok curiously. hyungseok beams down at him, sunshine with rosy cheeks. 

"jaeyeol-ah, you're so cute! you eat like a little hamster, hehe~"

jaeyeol giggles when hyungseok ruffles his hair. hyungseok is much nicer than kitae-hyung. jaeyeol hopes hyungseok will come around again.

hyungseok visits for playdates a few times, sometimes with the other boys, sometimes by himself. the butler and the maids adore him - he's so well-mannered, so respectful, responsible enough to clean up after himself. even jaeyeol's father thinks he's been raised well. 

sometimes, he comes over to help babysit baby jaehye too, since the maids need a break from looking after a wailing infant (read: literal demon in disguise), and jaehye seems to like hyungseok an awful lot. she'll climb onto his lap and hold his fingers and refuse to let go, and jaeyeol wishes he was young enough to do the same without it looking odd. 

it feels strange for jaeyeol to be fighting his little sister for his older brother's best friend's attention, but the hongs have never really been a normal family. 

jaeyeol finds out not long later that hyungseok is poor.

kitae-hyung decides to host hyungseok's twelfth birthday at their house, since it's spacious enough for everyone hyungseok wants to invite. hyungseok tries to reject kitae-hyung's offer, but the two hong brothers gaze at him pleadingly until he crumbles.

"it's like you guys want a birthday party more than me," grumbles hyungseok half-heartedly, "isn't it almost jaeyeolie's birthday soon anyway?"

"i just want my best friend to have a nice birthday!" kitae-hyung says. neither of the two brothers mention that jaeyeol doesn't have any friends to invite to a birthday party, which is why the hong mansion has only had one birthday party since kitae-hyung's last one. 

jaeyeol asks one of the older maids to teach him how to knit, and for the two weeks before hyungseok's birthday, he shuts himself away in his room, concentrating hard so he can make row after row of stitches. he pricks himself a few times, but it's worth it, because he now has a completed scarf that looks relatively good, considering he only just learned to knit. it's a creamy white color, and jaeyeol thinks it'll look good on hyungseok.

he keeps it safe until the day of hyungseok's birthday, and when hyungseok finally arrives - yes, jaeyeol was waiting by the door - he instantly shoves the scarf into hyungseok's arms.

"oh!" 

hyungseok fumbles with it a little, almost drops it, and their fingers brush when jaeyeol catches the trailing ends of it and hands it back to hyungseok. jaeyeol flushes immediately, pulling his hand away because it tingles where he's been touched.

hyungseok doesn't seem to notice, instead cooing over the scarf. he wraps it around his neck, beaming. "thank you, jaeyeolie-ah, it's beautiful."

[stuckinapril]

people who only use conventional social media are so funny bc they’ll casually be like “can I see your tumblr??” are you Insane. this is no instagram or twitter. this is my vault of secrets

[qtt-art]

1910 collective days of human life, all for this?

Hi I love Anya. I'd like to draw Swansea too because he's my 2nd fav but that'll come another time. Image description: a drawing of Anya from the game Mouthwashing. She is sitting on the floor surrounded by empty bottles of mouthwash floating in a non-literal pool of blue liquid.

[shitty-check-please-aus]

What we need to do is convince all the disney adults in america that high speed rail would be a preferable way of getting to disneyworld compared to driving or flying. We could maybe harness their fondness for the monorail or something, but this is a group of people that has time, income, and passion that we could leverage. If we could direct 5% of the enthusiasm they have for limited edition popcorn buckets into calling their representatives and demanding high-speed interstate rail, we could get it by 2030

[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

I am incredibly serious right now when I beg you all, please, and if you have Twitter or Tiktok or whatever to please spread the word: click on an author's profile on Ao3.

You want to know if an author has written more? Want to know if they're still writing? Want to see more from them? Want to know if they've written a trope or kink or sex scenario you enjoy?

Click on their name. And look at their profile.

I cannot tell you how many times in the last six months someone has read a new or newer fic of mine and said they (a new reader who has read nothing else I've done) "can't wait to see what you do next!" I've written 50+ fics and over a million words already.

"I don't know if you're still writing..." click on my profile. I am. I literally wrote a 128k+ fic for that ship last month.

"Would you ever do X?" "Please do Y!" I already did. Click on my name and look at my works.

Archive of our Own is a library. It's an archive. Not social media. It is your responsibility to fight back against the laziness that corporate algorithms have trained into you.

Click my author name. Just click it. Just click it.

Before you demand more, or ask if a writer will do XYZ, or wonder if the author still writing, or anything - click on their profile. Click on the author's profile.

I'm not trying to be mean or condescending or anything like that. I'm just exhausted. It's disheartening and frustrating to repeat myself ad nauseam, because someone couldn't take thirty seconds to do the tiniest bit of work to see if I've written lately, if I've written more for their ship, or scan my works to see if I've written what they're asking for. Please. Please. I'm begging.

Click the author's name, and explore before you ask.

[weaselweaselweasel]

What do you mean Tim doesn’t stay alive and well and happy and silly and funny and alive forever WHAT DO YOU MEANNNNNNN

[lauraneedstochill]

Viserys I Targaryen and his brother Daemon vs Aegon II Targaryen and his brother Aemond

🔪 inspired by this tweet:

[phillip-bankss]

Ok this is a long shot but I’ve been looking for this for years. Circa maybe 2017. There used to be an artist on here that was a classically trained oil painter who painted these elegant scenes where the subject was always a twink model posed erotically with very poorly drawn MSPaint style anime guys as if it was a someone’s deviantart OC photoshopped into a picture, but it was all part of the painting. He would post his pieces displayed next to the irl twink model he painted. Help me find him

[scre6m]

"I found an old email that he sent me… yeah he. Some shit’s changed but bitch, I hope you’re happy. ‘Cause I’m a lesbian now!" — CHAPPELL ROAN (x) @lgbtqcreators​ creator meme (v2): [1/4] lgbtq+ people in music

[choodraws]

🌱✂️ (crop from this month's patreon piece)

twitter | ig | inprnt | patreon | store

[abyssalzones]

uhmm. swap carpet stuff.

[loufuckers]

wait so apparently some people get mad if someone else writes fanfiction based on headcanons they shared on tumblr??? so now i got to ask

[violent138]

In universe, Dick Grayson's equivalent of Bruce dropping out of med school is absolutely everyone demanding to know why he didn't go to the Olympics with his gymnastics abilities.

[transgendrine]

i love it when wilson fucks around with house its SO FUNNY

[moodyvoid]

You’re an underground pro hero and you get invited to a heroes event. There are all sorts of paparazzi and media there snapping pictures, recording, and interviewing the heroes.

After the event, you’re watching back an interview you did and you notice Hawks walking by in the background and he stops and looks at you like you’re the hottest thing he’s ever seen in his life.

In one of his interviews, you walk by and he pauses to pass you a glance and he turns back to the camera like “Who is that? 😳🥵”