#but not gay together cause they’re sisters and that’s gross

[cloudyswritings]

The Silly Ones

just a dump for some silly headcanons from different fandoms.

Hollow Knight:

Smoker Hornet: see my other post

Hollow likes scarfs, like they just like being cozy.

Kinda morbid, but Grimm has a collection of small like, lumaflies, maskflies, and other relatives pinned up in his tent. This includes non-sapient butterflies. He does it to get out his aggression for his sister.

PK absolutely eats via his head, like bro has a mouth between his crown. It’s like a garbage disposal.

if he had a weapon, it’d be a trident with some dramatic name. But he’d secretly call it the Pale Fork

The dreamers once sealed started playing card games together. They really want to play euchre but don’t want to invite the radiance as their fourth.

Dryya: might just be canon but she’s gay for the white lady. The biggest silliest gay.

Zote used to be a higher being…

Hollow can’t sleep and Ghost is the biggest napper. Hollow carries them around like a little tote bag.

Rainworld:

Saint isn’t actually fluffy, but like a kinda gross slimy fluff, like they’re still a scug and scugs are slimy bois

Rivulet spends like 500 cycles trying to get that damn rarefaction cell to moon without chucking it into the void from pebbles can.

The ancients in pebbles city used to drink Pebsi, named after his august self.

NSH is responsible for miros vultures, suffice to say the local scugs went out their way to damage his structure in small ways when they found out.

Artis bomb jumps are just superpowered farts

Pebbles could’ve been saved if he just took up a hobby like every other damn iterator.

Pjo(these are more serious):

Gaia insited on Percy’s blood because he inherited on of his fathers names related to the earth, specifically Gaienokhos which has a possible interpretation as Holder of the Earth

Percy actually is mostly the son of Yam the twisting serpent, it’d explain his poison control, the weird shit he does with the rivers of the underworld, as well as the general strength buff he has compared to poisedons strength names. This is mostly something I learned from reading An Undertow of Sand by Shujin on space battles, so please go check it out, you won’t regret it.

Thalia could see and hear as her tree form, she regrets this immensely.

Percy is actually really good at sciences? Like especially chemistry.

I feel like he could easily start incorporating biology from various marine creatures as a power if he really tried. Like he could make his blood poisonous, or possibly slow his metabolism to survive the cold like a Greenland shark. He may even do this subconsciously to survive the pressure by taking chemicals from deep seas snail fish.

on that note I feel like he has the ability of tuna to conserve the heat generated by like normal metabolism and use it to warm his core temperature and speed up his metabolism for short bursts of incredible strength and speed.

Amphitrite is the true ruler of Atlantis, Poseidon is just her trophy husband. This is like pseudo canon? Cause she’s legit a titan(second gen I think?, her dad is Oceanus) so…

[shittyrpmusing]

VIGILANTE (PEACEMAKER) - SENTENCE STARTERS

Mentions of NSFW topics and violence. Alter as needed!

“If someone doesn’t have their pinky toe they’ll fall over! It’s the most important toe on the human body!”

“I’m just looking from behind a trash can, it’s a normal thing to do!”

“Fuck this, no way! It’s over, you won! Fair fight! I gotta go!”

“If I keep changing my facial expressions, they won’t be able to recognize me in a lineup!”

“Fine, I don’t care! I’ll get on the ground all day long!”

“FUUUCK! It hurts to walk on!”

“Which one of you dumb sister-fucking, tiki torch carrying, Sloth from the Goonies pieces of shit wants to go next?”

“Do you have cable? I don’t wanna stay here overnight if there’s no cable. Fargo’s on tonight.” 

“I’m just the guy who’s gonna fuck you so hard your asshole’s gonna be dragging behind you like a tail.” 

“Oh! Okay, then I change my answer to just ignoring the question.” 

“Well how else am I gonna experience motherhood?” 

“Oh, okay, now we definitely have to kill them ‘cause you’re giving stuff away about my secret identity!” 

“Don’t fuck with my BFF!”

“We can’t use duct tape, that’ll hurt their skin when they try to pull it off.” 

“I’m fine, seriously. All I need is a good nap.” 

“Look man, I’m begging you, will you please, PLEASE look at my crotch?”

“We only kill bad people! Usually. Unless there’s a mistake.”

“Listen, I’ve been meaning to thank you for allowing me to be tortured last night.” 

“You have to admit, it was kinda sweet how he wanted that monkey and that man to be friends.” 

“Shouldn’t you kill him, then?”

“My dad never made me anything. He was too busy pretending to be gay to get away from me.” 

“It’s our day off, I thought we’d get wasted!”

“I’m getting this weird feeling that you’re angry.” 

“Dude, a butterfly is a type of bird.” 

“You’re a little intense right now. Like, I don’t wanna be uncool but your face looks really weird when it goes into all those various angry positions.” 

“There’s no wrong time to rock, motherfucker!”

“Dude, this is a really weird time to do your face exercises.” 

“Try introspection on THAT, motherfucker! ... I’m sorry.”

“I WAS about to go, and then you had to say THAT! Now if I acquiesce, I’ll look and feel small!”

“If you’re gonna be sarcastic, you should really warn people so there’s no confusion.” 

“Your blades are dull as fuck, man! Why don’t you maintain your torture shit?!”

“Just because they’re aliens doesn’t mean they’re gross. BIGOTRY!”

“I’m not sure I’m ever gonna walk again.” 

“You’ll fall over all the time and look stupid and everyone will laugh at you.” 

“I thought that man and that chimp were friends. I was thinking they were gonna go on an adventure together.” 

“Aw, fuck! I’m never ever gonna kill someone with a fucking chainsaw!”

“I would read anything you wrote, dude. I bet you could do some bomb poetry.” 

“Yeah? Well, welcome to the fucking club!”

“There’s your answer! AHAHAHA!”

“Are you here to put babies in us like in Alien?”

“I think they jumped over those bullets.” 

“Look, at worst, he’s paralyzed.” 

“I’m gonna make a collage of the three of us fuckin’ some chicks with a bunch of dolphins around us doing beer bongs in a Corvet.” 

“We used to go out, kill bad guys, boom boom boom, no problem. We accidentally kill the wrong person? Oh shoot, that stinks-- then we move on!”

[cuteniaarts]

Just four sisters, chilling in their pyjamas on an abandoned tea farm at sunset, whispering about... y’know... whatever

[ID: A digital drawing of four characters: Korra from The Legend of Korra and three OCs from LoK centric fanfiction. They’re sitting on a wooden veranda with a reddish orange sunset sky and a few faint clouds in the background. On the left end, Midori, a Mingzan kid OC from Seeds of the Red Lotus, is leaning back with her legs folded under her, propping herself up on her right hand. Her hair is black and falls just past her shoulders, and her eyes are grey. She is wearing a mustard yellow shirt with elbow-length sleeves and green hem, matching yellow pants and a warmer green undershirt. On her right is Korra, sitting with her legs crossed and her arms behind her. She has her Book 4 hairstyle. She is wearing a grey tank top and light blue baggy pants with a darker blue hem. On her forearms are matching black tattoos patterned after Water Tribe armbands. On her right is Nazra, a P’heer kid OC from Empty and Become Wind, who is behind a yellow paper fencing. She is drawn from the chest up, wearing a green long-sleeved shirt with a grey hem. Her hair is up in a high ponytail with the sides of her head shaved, and her eyes are a brownish red. On her forehead is a combustionbender tattoo, patterned after P’Li’s but more detailed. An outline of her legs is seen as a shadow through the paper fence. Her elbows are resting on the wooden beam above the paper fence and her hands are folded in front of her. On the right end is Suiren, a Mingzan kid OC from Seeds of the Red Lotus and Midori’s older sister. She is sitting on the wooden beam with her legs hanging downward but not reaching the ground. Her hands are rested behind her on the beam, supporting her. Her hair is long and black, styled in a low ponytail with a light yellow hair tie, thrown over her left shoulder, and her eyes are golden brown. She is wearing an oversized blue shirt with elbow-length sleeves and a light yellow hem. The right sleeve is falling off her shoulder, baring her collarbone. Her mouth is open and she is looking to her right. Midori, Korra and Nazra are all looking at Suiren. Their shadows are all falling left. /End ID]

I tried adding an image description to this, and it’s my first time actually writing one so let me know if you find anything I need to correct.

Y’all would not BELIEVE the hoops I had to jump through to get this done-

1) It took me 2 weeks

2) Halfway through the shading I remembered that in EaBW, Korra is supposed to have tattoos patterned after Water Tribe armbands and had to start over

3) I thought I was done but then I realised I drew the shadows the wrong way

4) I’ve only drawn Korra twice before AND HER HAIR IS A PAIN

5) THE POSES

6) THE FUCKING LIGHTING

I could keep complaining but I’ll stop while I’m ahead

I feel like Suiren would inherit her mother’s storytelling prowess and would often make up stories for her sisters, even when they’re no longer kids. She’d probably first start doing it when they were running through the desert after Korra’s parents died (and when they arrived in Zaofu) so that her sisters wouldn’t be scared, and maybe she’d start it up again when they go to Republic City to attempt to maintain some sense of normalcy and familiarity.

- - -

Suiren and Midori are from my own fic, Seeds of the Red Lotus, while Nazra is from the Fate Amenable to Change series by @esaleyon and @felicity-kitten

[legless-fish-on-rollerskates]

All the morons trying to claim that Dean wasn't saying anything to Cas because he was holding back slurs or something equally ridiculous... what show have you been watching? Surely not Supernatural. Like, yeah, Dean had some internalized shit for a while (mostly cause of how he was raised, let's be real), but this isn't season fucking one. Dean's in his goddamn forties now guys.

But you still think Dean Winchester is homophobic? Let's examine the evidence then, shall we?

1. Aaron Bass: Dean was flustered because he's not used to being hit on by dudes, but he was completely respectful. And he was alone, too. It wasn't like he was trying to "hide his homophobia" from Sam. He could've said whatever he wanted in that moment without anyone ever knowing, and he chose to awkwardly walk backward and wish Aaron a nice day. Then later, when they're working with him, Dean says nothing about it (other than a quick "he was my gay thing" to Sam), doesn't make it weird, and talks to him exactly the same way he would talk to anyone else.

2. Jesse and Ceasar: Dean's surprised when he realizes that they're married, again because he's not really used to it and so he made the wrong assumptions (which I will point out is really really normal, it happens all the time even between queer people, because heteronormativity is very much a thing in real life). But what does he do when he finds out? He asks them about their marriage - with genuine curiosity. What's it like to be in a relationship with a hunter, is it hard, all that jazz. Never asks about the fact that they're both men, none of those gross "so who's the woman" questions, literally just. Talking to two married hunters. That's it. Then later, when they're working, he never once questions their capability as hunters or suggests that they're weak in any way. There's no "you're less 'manly' because you're gay" mindset at all. And at the end of the episode he's genuinely happy for them, two hunters who managed to get out of the life and retire together.

There's lots of other examples (several male cops have been obviously into him over the years, his reaction to Jody talking about Claire and Kaia, all the subtext surrounding Lee, etc.) but for my last one for now, let's not forget...

3. Charlie fucking Bradbury: Arguably Dean's best friend besides Cas (no I haven't forgotten about Benny, I love Benny, but he was part of a very specific chapter of Dean's life and that chapter is done). We've known she was a lesbian from the get-go, and Dean takes it in stride when he finds out, immediately improvising to coach her through some painfully awkward flirting so she can get into the office ("you've just come home, and Scarlett Johansson is waiting for you"). And yes, there's the whole "I feel dirty" "yeah so do I" bit there, but that's clearly established as a joke, plus the guy was gross - as someone who is attracted to both women and men, I would feel dirty after flirting with him too.

The next few times we see Charlie, she and Dean are geeks and dweebs together, Dean is having more fun than we've seen in years, and we see him be a really good friend - in some ways, a better friend than he is to Cas. Charlie talks to him a little bit about girls, they LARP, they go shopping together, Dean comforts her when she has to let go of her mom. When she's killed, he gets so upset he goes on a murderous rampage (maybe not the most healthy way to deal with greif, but nonetheless showing how much she mattered to him). When he sees an alternate version of her in trouble he's immediately ready to risk his own life to help her even though she doesn't know him. He loved her like a sister, and he never once expressed any issues with her sexuality.

So let's go back to Cas. Cas is in love with Dean. Not much of a surprise there, he's said it before. But this is the first time Dean understands that that's what he's saying. It makes sense that he's a little stunned, especially considering that Cas is also saying that he's about to die. I mean, if your best friend of twelve years told you one day that they've been in love with you all along, that just knowing you has irrevocably changed them for the better, and that also by the way telling you this means they're going to die, mightn't you be rendered a tad speechless?

Dean does not hate Cas for this. Not at all. Because whether or not Dean is bi, whether or not he reciprocates, Cas is still his best friend. We've seen how hard Dean grieves every time Cas dies. We know how much Cas matters to him. Of all the shit they've put each other through, there's absolutely no logical reason for this to be the thing that damages their friendship beyond repair. Not after everything. No fucking way.

Dean says nothing because he doesn't know what to say, because he's still processing Cas's confession but also already grieving and blaming himself for Cas's death. The way he breaks down at the very end of the episode? That's not a man who's disgusted. That's a man who's shattered.

How dare you try to simplify this incredibly complex and emotional moment into Dean being a dick. How dare you. It's positively insulting. The entire point of Cas's speech was that Dean is so much more than that. If you can't see that, than I'm sorry, but you're missing the whole message of the show.

Supernatural is about family and sacrifice. It's about free will, making your own choices. And it's about being more than just who you're supposed to be, going beyond what other people want or assume. All the depth beneath the surface. That's the show. That's why we're still watching after all this time. Because it means something important. Something relevant. Something real.

Don't you fucking discredit that.

(thank you for coming to my TED talk)

[expiredfairydust]

pride and prejudice - soudam

-a/n, this will be all written from kazuichi’s point of view in first person-

the crowd was buzzing with excitement, rainbows and bright colours everywhere. despite the utter eyestrain my poor head was subjected to, i was having a really good time! not because I’M gay or whatever!! i was there with komaeda is all, coz i wanted him to know i’m cool with it now we’re like buddies and whatever.

exceeept for when i lost him in the parade, a herd of drag kings and queens separating us, followed by tons of more people, until i was on opposite sides of the parade to him, probably coz of poor komaeda’s luck biting him in the arse at the worst of times.

but it was ok, because i was chatting to a girl wearing a pin with red and orange and white and pink on it, and she seemed really nice! i didn’t get to ask what her pin meant though,, she had blue hair and reminded me of that pop idol in the year below me at school,, i wonder if they’re sisters. she had a friend who was holding hands with her with black hair in two twirly ponytail-things that i recognised but didn’t know her name so just waved and kept talking in the hopes that i wouldn’t have to name the goth-looking girl.

i saw lots of different people during the parade today! it’s so cool how many people are happy to be themselves! it makes me feel happy to be near so many lgbt+ people— even though i’m not one of them! definitely not!!

i saw someone really pretty in the crowd with browny-blondey hair who i recognised after a while was that tech kid from the year below who sometimes turns up to my STEM club, she was wearing one of the few flags i recognised as a cape; the non binary flag! i wanted to talk to them and ask about it but i was worried that i’d look intrusive so didn’t approach,,

after a few hours it was becoming more and more obvious that i had completely lost komaeda, so i went wading through the crowd of rainbows and smiles in an attempt to find him. past tanaka’s friend hifumi; past miss sonia and miss ibuki, the latter plastered in neon paint like it was skin ointment; past leon, wearing a blue and pink and white flag and no shirt- god he’s so hot, he even has muscles from his baseball even though he’s rather lean— scrap passing him i was probably stuck there staring at him for a solid half hour before wiping away a small amount of drool over him— but NOT because i’m gay!!!!! he was just super hot,,, not in a gay way though! i can just appreciate beauty when i see it!

once i had given up on finding komaeda, a tap on my shoulder startled me into whipping my head around to look, straight in the eyes,,

at the most gorgeous person i’d ever seen, period. soft heterochromic eyes that filled my stomach butterflies; raven hair seeming so soft i wanted nothing more than to pet it for hours on end; and a face that belonged to none other than tanaka. fucking. gundham!! it was wearing a few pronoun pins so i read them and made a mental note before realising vamp was speaking to me

“-souda? are you listening to me?” doll had the most beautiful pout on dolls face as it whined playfully, and her pout almost made me feel guilty for the sheepish response that came from my mouth:

“uh no, i was- i’m sorry tanaka”

yet he didn’t get angry or sad at all! it smiled at me in a soft manner before asking, “i asked is something bothering you?” before asking another question, but not without a little hesitance - “are you here um alone? or are you- are you with someone?” to which i quickly replied,

“i’m here to support komaeda but uh i kinda lost him in the crowd and now i can’t find him” with a nervous laugh.

“ah, he does that a lot doesn’t he?”

we chatted absent mindedly for what felt like it could’ve been forever before tanaka offered to help me look for komaeda, so we started wading through the ocean of people, the masses of bodies forcing me to grab tanaka’s hand to keep me from losing vamp too. i swear, it was only because i didn’t wanna lose him though!! not because her hands were warm,, or soft,,, or fit perfectly into mine,,,,, not at all!!! i was just keeping vamp close!!

although i can’t help and say it was suuuper adorable when i saw dolls face go a faint pink as it hid its face in her scarf and mumbled something about his skin being poisonous, to which i couldn’t help but playfully coo, “guess i’ll have to fight the infection off for you~” which caused vamps face to heat up even more hehe it’s fun to fluster him, i know how touch starved she is (not in a gross way! get your mind out of the gutter kaz!!)

after a while, while everyone is starting to go home from the parade, we found komaeda finally, and at this point i was clinging to tanaka’s arm as if my life depends on it. coz i was REALLY scared of getting lost. not coz i’m gay. at all.

i spent the rest of the day with komaeda and tanaka, though i kept hold of tanaka’s hand until i was forced to let go to get us crisps. i felt kinda disappointed, like i was missing something without its hand in mine, but whatever i bet it’s just coz i’m just as touch started as doll!

we hung out at a park but there wasn’t room for all three of us on the swings so tanaka did something i never expected, vamp sat on my lap and we swung together on one swing.

whatever, he probably just thought i’d be comfier to sit with than komaeda.

at the end of the day, after komaeda had been gone for a while - apparently hajime needed to ask him about some homework? even though they’re not even in the same classes - tanaka greeted me goodbye by taking my hand and pressing into it a badge with a bluey-tealy flag on it, then doll kissed my hand and said “we should hang out again, my dark prince, i had a lovely time” with a warm smile, though i got the impression that next time komaeda wouldn’t be joining us. i also got the feeling that i’d be okay with that.

maybe i’m not as not-gay as i thought…

[pocketramblr]

Poll Results

Alright, that’s it, i’m tired of trying to sort the answers so yall just get the big list of all the free response answers to that quiz about ofa. be aware some are less safe for work than others.

memorable ones: OfA Snickerdoodle, I’d Give It To A Cat, So You Know Vore Right?, I’m in Love With Nana, Slicey Blood Oath, and Homoerotic Sword Fight

(My answer above is how I think it did happen, not how I want it to happen.) I personally think something along the lines of a Bruce Banner Jennifer Walker blood transfusion where the OFA holder doesn’t realize they’ve passed it on until later.

a tender kiss. perhaps loving. perhaps they're dying, and i already knew that they loved me, either platonically or otherwise, and we always knew that i'd be next. perhaps they tried so hard to make sure it never happened, and perhaps that tender kiss as an apology as much as it is a gift. sure sucks to be gay i guess 

Peacefully? By doing the do and making it a wonderful moment of lovemaking and passing on the future.. If we're in the middle of battle you bet your freaking butt I want them to kiss me dramatically, tell me they love me, and then yeet me away as they turn back to the fight. Ow but relationship goals. 

If we're not romantic because I am obsessed with the Duo Holders ship currently, blood works fine. Ingest it or have them pressing a bloody palm into a wound of mine *shrugs* Gotta pass it along somehow

Personally, I'd rather drink blood instead of hair. It feels less gross. But I'd pass it on as hair just to fuck with my successor

Hair or blood eating, but no touchy-touchy or whatever thx.

Probably a vial of blood so it’s easy and over quick

kiss 👉👈

i would like it to be blood from an already opened wound just cause it would probably less weird, ..........but knowing my luck and because irl my sister has attempted to feed me her baby teeth by shoving it to my lips and saying "eat", thats actually how i would get ofa. ( >:/ i have almost eaten at least two teeth this way because i thought she was being nice and giving me candy )

Consider: doing one of those blood oath things where you swear to be BFFs for eternity except now you also get a quirk out of it. But lbr kissing is way more romantic and you’ve made First/Second my new OTP, so I’ll stick with that for them. <3 But also, maybe to make the kiss option more romantic First thought something more along the lines of wishing he could give ~everything he has/all of himself~ to Second which counted as including his quirk, rather than specifically about giving him the power to defeat his brother?

This is going to sound gross but all ways of transferring DNA is. Just work up a sweat and have the other party drink it. It would probably be the best tasting option which is kinda a weird thing to think about. Nvm sweat doesn't contain DNA looked it up but I don't want to delete all of this so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ maybe a scraping of skin cells

Honestly the hair is probably the way I'd want to go. That or blood. Like just swallowing it.

Look, i know realistically it was probably some desparate on-the-brink-of-death "please defeat my brother" thing and oo, magic he gets the quirk. But consider. First's last fight with afo. Second is holding his bleeding body, crying. First gently cups Second's cheek and pulls him into a bloody kiss before dying. Second pulls himself together just long enough to flip off afo, barely resisting the urge to absolutely slaughter him, knowing he would lose. He finds his successor and trains him to the best of his ability, determined to not lose another person he cared for

I mean like dead skin cells probably dont work right? Except hair works so thats not true. So like you totally could lick someone to get OFA. Like could you imagine the whole holding your hand over someones mouth to shut them up but they lick you and they somehow wind up with your quirk, like crazy. What must have been the trial and error with this stuff cause they must have kept passing it inbetween each other to figure out its dna right. How long did it take for them to realize. Like you’re eating breakfast and theres a hair in your food like ew and why am i stronger now. Overall, comedic timing for getting a quirk would be hilarious.

My apprentice lays broken and bloody beneath me as I cradle them in my arms, crying on to an open wound on their face praying the power will be enough to save them

little bit of skin like a hang nail just like put it in a sandwich and dont thing about it

Put it in my coffee.

If I received it from Nana then I would love to have received it via eating her out~ though for passing it on to others I think I would just either spit into their mouths or shove a bleeding finger down their throat until they swallow and then run and get myself killed by AfO while taunting him with "I DON'T HAVE YOUR BROTHER'S QUIRK ANYMORE! SUCK MY NON-EXISTENT DICK YOU LOSER!"

knock me out and just inject the blood. if i have to actively think abt ingesting someone elses dna im gonna yeet myself into the ocean. to pass it on i'll just spit in a cup (or in their mouth) bc im not gonna make someone eat my hair nor is anyone getting my blood

who in their right mind would trust me with a power like ofa 💀afo just looks at me funny the quirk is his. im not a mc for a reason

Sexy battle where I’m the villain, and randomly the hero thinks “I wish I could save you”. Boom I punch them with bloody knuckles and the quirk passes to me. Now the hero has to teach me how to be good again. Also we fall in love.

You know, I always assumed I would head canon it as something romantic until canon proved me wrong But these options are so varied - I had to choose the most Dramatic (tm) one As for my actual answer: a gentle kiss with full consent from both parties

I will bite a holder as a sign of affection. There's probably some dead skin cells in the arm I can swallow by accident. They are used to this and sometimes we switch the quirk around for funsies.

You know, I spent like 10 minutes trying to think of something original here, but knowing my shit luck some bastard would spit in my drink or something and cast upon me the Curse of Bone Breaking and/or.... y’know..... AFO...........

okay this is gonna sound weird but. consider this i marry a very lovely women. we are in much love. we get attacked by evil people because she is a good hero but plot twist. i am secretly her nemisis. the attackers are my minions. i wanted her to protect me because i am very smol but. my comrades were too mean. she is nearly dead. "take this" she says. she kisses me and i am one for all. fuck, i say internally, but i dont tell her. she dies in my arms. i run and become vigilante and take down my once comrades. all is not well. i die unsatisfied. i eventually pass it onto a cat in an alleyway because they are the only one who is with me when i get hit with a back alley sniper

Blood or just like. skin. You could use nail clippers to take a bit off from a really fleshy area, like just under the nail. It's that easy

Spit in my food like an underpaid fast food worker.

i have long hair so that would not be ideal, but blood seems kinda...unsanitary, but i guess it would be better if i was 100% positive i wouldn't pass on some sort of disease. so if that could be ascertained then like a few drops of blood in a glass of water or something and then down the hatch, bam ofa passed on. i know other folks are probably typing some nsfw stuff but just. no. keep it in your pants y'all.

Blood transfusion First, pick a hospital Second, steal all their blood Third, have the previous user donate their blood to that hospital Fourth, get into a major accident and need a blood transfusion near the hospital you robbed Fifth, hope either OfA will only pass onto you bc your the intended recipient, or that no one else needs a blood transfusion Sixth, get the transfusion Seventh, steal all of the previous users blood back Eigth, return all the other stolen blood Ninth, get new identities, this crime leaves DNA everywhere Tenth, die of a blood clot due to incompatible blood types (optional)

okay realistically bleeding into a cut or a drop of blood into water and drinking it would be easiest but like... what if somehow dna could be baked into like a muffin or cookie or something... like i know when cooking with wines and stuff the alcohol cooks away and evaporates out but is that process the same for like blood? like if you baked your blood into a cookie would traces of your dna still be there? basically i want an ofa cookie (snickerdoodle preferably)

no i like my bones

drink a drop of blood. it'd go down easier than hair

no

Something dramatic and desperate in the heat of battle like blood or something

First of all, I think First passed OfA as he was dying entirely on accident, because Second was badly (though not critically) injured and they'd been sort of dancing around each other's feelings and doubting their own worth, so First, knowing he was dying and that his brother was a petty bitch who would probably kill Second anyway because he knows that First cared about him, kisses Second with blood on his lips and his last thoughts before dying are about how he wants Second to have the strength to survive if his brother comes after him.

If I was given the option of getting OfA, I wouldn't take it. I'm a coward and being given something like that is a death sentence.

If it was forced, probably ingesting the previous users blood, because blood is a lot easier to choke down than hair.

If I already had it and had to pass it on, I would want it to be something suitably dramatic like collapsing on the doorstep of a trusted loved one and explaining with my dying breath who killed me and why and then raising my blood covered hand to their face like I was going to caress their cheek only for them to taste blood. They cry and try to get me take it back and when I finally die they swear vengeance over my slowly cooling corpse.

Pass it on in a non-life threatening scenario where I decide I actually don’t like the weird bone breaking power a random person gave me as they were dying and wish I could pass it to someone else and through a weird set of circumstances end up accidentally cooking some of my own hair into brownies I was making because I shed like a dog and passing it to my new neighbor I came to welcome to the neighborhood.

Either drinking a glass of milk with their saliva (no icky hair taste), or an epic sharing of blood while clasping hands like knights in a noble brotherhood!

not by eating all mights long ass hair thats for sure, why did he give midoriya one of the longest ones he had, he has shorter hair right there on the back of his head. not to mention the fact of like how i would prefer to recieve it or give it away which would be just, fucking sharing a pop or something and swaping it through the backwash??? less nasty than hair and not as weird as the other options for spit which is like straight up spitting in a drink or the other persons mouth outside of kissing. if someone told me i had to eat their hair i would straight up say no thanks, cheers for the fitness glow up tho homie

I want nana 2 kiss me, on.,, the m,,,.."#*(@÷out.h pretty lady.,

Q-tip to the inside of the cheek

Those blood pacts where you slice your hands open and do a little handshake thing. Not very creative, but idk it just appeals to me

Via consumption of blood, babey

I would want it to be with a maybe maybe not homoerotic sword fight in a Wendy's parking lot, preferably while we are both being impaled on each other's swords. The sweet pain of almost dying is a very intense moment to share isn't it?

Sweet love

Hair

If it's someone cute, a kiss. Otherwise I'd probably just swallow a hair with some water.

i'd just like. spit in their water bottle. if thats not enough dna i guess licking a paper cut it is. hair is bad idwa bc it doesn't digest and can get wrapped up in things. and like. im too aroace for kissing and such

Last option, cause first is sexy as hell

okay you know what vore is, right. and you know how blood and organ transfusions work? well...

Not at all, like?? I enjoy being alive and not having my body destroyed thank you. Literally everyone with OfA died young-ish or has suffered debilitating injuries bc of it. Like Midoriya's bones are powder, and we don't even need to go into All Might's medical history. Like thanks but no thanks no freaky dna ingestion 4 me

Had a open cut from a can lid and ofa holder had an open cut. While lamenting about fins a successor.

Blood

Assuming we can bypass the rules of canon, it would be funny as fuck is OFA was passed on by intentional physical contact. So yes, a smooch for First and Second (and Second and Third) but also. Bitchslap of destiny. Nana giving her protege one last hug. All Might ruffles Mido’s hair like a dad to pass it on. I’m sure you get it

Bleeding over an open wound

lil bit of spit in a milkshake.

I hold their hand Platonically but it's summer and we're both sweaty and they're a little loopy and having weird thoughts due to dehydration and heat lmao, literally hanging around anyone for any extended period of time guarantees you accidentally ingest SOME of their dna. Dead skin cells are floating through the air ~constantly~ and if you have a friend I promise you've inhaled their dead skin cells before. Have fun with that knowledge!!

ok so like deffo a kiss, but in canon people get weird biological urges for using their quirks, like bby Toga drinking bird blood. First has had a LOT of "spit in their drink" intrusive thoughts over the years. immediately post first-kiss he is mystified that his intrusive thoughts have disappeared entirely, but then BAM it seems that second has the stockpile now, and with it, a preoccupation with vampire lore

drink from the same water bottle?

“EAT THIS!”

Pass it on by making them lick my arm because that would make them rly uncomfortable, passed to me by spiting in my 20oz Red Bull and then chugging it

[takaraphoenix]

Buffy Season 8: Review

It’s bad. It’s just... really... bad. That’s the TL;DR of this review. There was one (1) good thing about this season and that was the return of Oz. So if you’re looking for something that hypes season 8? This is not it. If you are confused, angry or salty about season 8? Hi, yes, me too.

Starting at the beginning. At first, I was really happy that they introduced more characters of color, with Renee and Satsu. And when Renee was then even “promoted” to Xander’s love interest? Nice. The two were even cute.

But no. That was all just the set-up to fridge her. Which, I am so very tired of that trope. And that is what that was. That wasn’t just a slayer dying during a fight. The entire issue of her death focused on her and Xander, building up to their relationship, setting them up for their first date, having her be prominently featured, just to then kill her off and have Xander avenge her.

What made it feel even worse - worse than just the fridging - was that they really had to fridge one of their very few women of color. And, to top it off, spend the entire issue in which she dies having her subjected to racism. Just great. Really, you managed to make an already shitty trope even worse. That’s impressive.

The racism itself too. Dracula. They just decided to make Dracula totally racist now, huh? and it doesn’t get a pass just because Xander points out in the comic that he doesn’t remember Dracula being this racist. Because he wasn’t. This Dracula just throws around slurs left and right in a way that feels more like the writers just really wanted to use slurs. Because the character? He was suave, charming, heck he charmed the straight men and the lesbians too when he was on the show. He was a smooth talker. This Dracula? He just... He was just racist and rude in general. Why.

Moving on from the racism to the next failure in rep. The gays. At this point in time I am simply convinced that Joss Whedon is entirely unfamiliar with the concept of bisexuality.

I know I’ve already made a separate post complaining about this, but it needs mentioning in the review of the season too. Having Buffy hook up with a lesbian twice, but #NoHomo, just a straight girl in her “experimental phase”. That’s just cringey and also offensive. Just... make her... come out as a bisexual? It’s not like the writing in the show hadn’t already set her up with quite the bi vibes.

Instead, the narrative made it sound like the only options would be to be straight or to now suddenly turn “into” a lesbian. Which is also offensive on itself, because - as this very show had proven on screen - lesbians can come out later in life and genuinely, I adore Willow’s arc. For her narrative, it fit to have her come out as a lesbian, the circumstances and her life fit for that. I absolutely agree that it would have been weird for Buffy to have a sudden coming out as a lesbian at that point in her life and after everything, but referring to it as turning into a dyke was just not great.

And lesbian wasn’t the only option. Though, I’m unsure Whedon knows that, considering that 6/6 canon queer characters are homosexual and 4/4 wlw are lesbians. They just keep introducing more lesbians - which, as a lesbian I am always in favor of more lesbians. However, when you have a very small number (2) of queer characters, it figures you can not cover all the sexualities and it’s even fair that even with two, you still choose to have them both be the same sexuality. But... the more you add? The more questionable it becomes that you limit it to one sexuality only.

This arc would have so beautifully set up for Buffy to come out as bi. But no.

And while we’re on the wlw; one of the things I always loved about Buffy was that the lesbians weren’t just there for the male gaze, they weren’t oversexualized. They desired each other, they even had sex. But... in a normal frame work, to a normal amount, meaning equal to how the straights were handled. I always liked that, because especially in early days, lesbians were usually just there to look really hot and have hot sex that straight men could get off to. Well, consider me very unimpressed with the comics, because... man are lesbians sexualized now. Willow gets a hot constantly naked snake goddess girlfriend whom she can only contact by - and I am not making this up - having an orgasm. So we prelude the trip by her having sex with Kennedy, before waking up all nude in snake goddess’ realm and usually having am makeout session or sex with her too while doing whatever business she has with her. So much nakedness, so much oversexualization. Really... disappointing.

Staying on the romance but turning to the other Summers sister, I truly can’t believe they made Xander/Dawn canon. Like, I can not comprehend they decided to make that a canon ship.

Sure, Dawnie’s had a crush on Xander since the literal beginning of Dawn. And that was... cute, honestly. Fifteen year old girls have crushes on cute older guys who are nice to them. Figures. Adorable. But she kind of... grew out of that over the course of the show? Or so it seemed...

And Xander. One of the things I loved about Xander was that Dawn was always a total no go. She was Buffy’s sister, heck, she was kind of every Scoobie’s little sister. He had always had brotherly advise for her. Heck, in this comic he points out that it’s weird since he’s known her since she was little - and yeah it is. It’s not weird when two people were both little together, but when one was sixteen when the other was eleven and one has babysat the other? That’s weird.

Getting infinitely more disturbing by the fact that she... literally... just turned eighteen. If they had put this into a rather later season, or a bigger time skip, had Dawn been A WomanTM for a few years now and Xander had gotten around to separating the idea of kiddo!Dawnie from the woman she has become, but Dawn is only eighteen, she hasn’t become a woman yet. She just turned legal to bang and thus, a switch was flipped in Xander’s mind, putting her on his radar. And just... no. Why.

And even beyond this decision; Dawn spends the first third of this season being slut-shamed in ridiculous ways. Which is also tiresome. I am the last person to defend cheaters, but there’s a difference between “You cheated and are being held accountable for it” and “You cheated so now you are cursed to be a giant, a centaur and then a porcellain doll for weeks at a time, being publicly humiliated and having control over your body taken away from you”. That was... sure a choice.

Moving on to the actual main problem of this season. The plot.

Starting with the incomprehensibly dumb idea of “hey let’s retreat to Tibet, put a huge target on Oz’s new home and get rid of all of our magic. surely that will not come to bite us in the arse when the bad guys find us”. Naturally, it came back to bite them in their collective asses. This was just... No one objected or pointed out how dumb that plan was? Really? No one? Really?

Anyway, let’s talk villains. And work our way up there. The return of Amy and Warren. Once again, I ask why. I’m still salty about the 180° Amy did from sweet Wiccan to wicked bitch after her stint as a rat, but having her now... hook up with Warren, the second biggest misogynist on this show, who is also skinless. She used a spell to keep him alive but she couldn’t... give the spell a color? Anything? Anything to not make him look flayed? Because this was just unnecessarily gross body-horror.

Not to mention the... lack of reaction? Sure, some spoke grumpily against working with Warren. But... this is Warren. The guy who killed Tara when he was trying to kill Buffy. There really should have been more breather-scenes of the Scoobies talking about this, digesting the fact that the guy was still alive and more so when they worked with him.

But nevermind them, because they’re working for Angel. Because Angel’s the villain behind this season. I mean, he was manipulated into that by Twilight, but manipulated means he still chose to do it.

Now let me preface that I might not ship Angel/Buffy, but that really only factors marginally in here, because this plot would be bullshit even if it were my OTP.

We now retcon the creation of the Slayers as not just being something dirty old men did in a cave, it was now all the greater plan of the universe. Which. Might have worked had Slayers been... naturally occuring. And not created by men, forcing this upon a young woman. Sure, what people do can be seen as the greater plan of the universe too if you will, but that seems like a cop-out that absolves bad people of their bad choices and deeds.

Anyway. The universe created Slayers and vampires and the ““balance”“ between them (which is bullshit anyway because 1 Slayer vs thousands of vampires... not balanced at all), including the now supposedly destined romance between Angel and Buffy.

Both get rewarded with super-powers now so they can super-fuck and thus give birth to a new universe. That universe is called Twilight and manifests as a burning, winged, green lion who can talk (because that sure is how I always headcanoned Angel/Buffy’s children to look like /s) and who, through time-travel shenannigans, has been manipulating Angel into his own creation.

The magic pull between them is so strong that it overrides the “Angel just caused the death of over two-hundred Slayers” so Buffy fucks him.

At which point I just... this season was flat-out character assassination of Angel? He was manipulated by the bad guy. Not controlled, manipulated. He caused the death of hundreds. He threw everything he stood for and believed in out the window for the promise of a paradise where he could be with Buffy, when the real Angel has chosen other things, higher goals, over being with Buffy over and over again, because that’s what they do. That is their whole thing, they choose the good of the world over being together. They have always been a “will they/won’t they?” where the answer is they won’t, because they know they are needed elsewhere, by others. But now Angel just... doesn’t care about all that anymore, or heck about his own son and his friends, ready to abandon everything for this.

And then when Twilight is born and consequently abandoned by Buffy, who still prioritizes her friends, family and the world over being with Angel, Angel actually... needs convincing in the abandoning? Because, again, character assassination. Ultimately, Angel gets controlled by Twilight and used to kill Giles and try to kill Buffy.

But thanks to the Deus Ex Machina of Spike dropping in in the final arc, they know how to stop this. He hasn’t been in this season so far, because - truly in line with this season - he was off being the king of a race of alien bugs, traveling in their space-ship.

To stop this all, they go back to Sunnydale, where of course the “heart of the Earth” is located, the seed that contains all magic, and destroy it, and with it all magic. Also, the Master was apparently always just there to guard that seed. He is now back from the dead!

Let me summarize that once more, just for emphasis: The universe wanted Buffy and Angel to fuck so they can give birth to a new universe that personifies as a green, winged, burning lion but before it can destroy our universe, Spike, now king of an alien bug race, delivers the solution to go back to Sunnydale and destroy the seed of all magic that is being guarded by a resurrected Master.

How do you read that with a straight face? How do you pitch that? This is just so incomprehensibly stupid.

We end the comic with Buffy as a waitress, hated by many, Xander and Dawn now have an apartment and are playing house, Willow broke up with Kennedy because she realized she is in love with the snake goddess she will now never get to see again, Giles is dead, Faith somehow inherited everything from Giles and she is also the designated Angel-sitter now.

[creativenostalgiastuff]

Fealty

Summary: Virgil wants to ask Roman to the prom. And sometimes things don’t quite go according to plan. HumanAU. Hurt/comfort. So much fluff with a dash of angst

Warnings: prom, anxiety, outting, homophobia, manipulation, self doubt, Janus as a villain, fighting, self deprecation

Word Count: 8k

AN: Oh my god. I love this story more than you can imagine. But it's also my longest one chapter thing ever . To help make it a little more digestible, it's broken into 3 parts. And you can read it along with the others in this… I guess AU or alone. Here is the link to the first in that sequence.

Before you ask, yes JD is Janus. To be fair, I started this before the last video came out. That being said, I will spoil it and let you know that Janus/JD is the bad guy in this. And I stand by that. I don’t think he always is (read my story Ally if you need an example where I don’t make him the bad guy). But he is here, so please just be mindful of that. 

Shout Out to @today-only-happens-once for all of her help with this fic. Also to @meowthefluffy and the one anon for their help with some prom culture questions I had! 

-1 month away-

“Patton, step to the left…. No, your other left,” Logan calls from the lighting platform to Patton who is standing on stage.

Virgil sits  on the lighting platform, in the back of the high school theater next to Logan. He sits on his leg while holding his other knee, biting at a hangnail as he watches a few lights change colors corresponding to the commands Logan is typing. The backdrop, once white, is now a wash of deep purple, accented by the heavy red lights hitting further up on the stage. He analyzes it silently as he tilts his head to the side. The way the lights are hitting Patton looks a bit better now that the purple downstage has been lifted and the red isn’t quite as intense. The stage now looks dramatic, yet keeps the softness Virgil is looking for.

“There. Is that better?” Logan asks. 

No, it looks dumb, thinks Virgil. I’ll look dumb. This whole thing is dumb!

Virgil leans back in his chair, nodding. “It’ll work.”

“Thank you, Patton,” calls Logan. “You can get down now.”

“Okay,” Patton says as he gives a little salute before walking to the stairs leading down from the stage. 

Virgil runs his hands over his pants, trying to dry them off. This is such a dumb idea. Why would Roman ever want to go to prom with an anxious mess?

“Relax,” suggests Logan. “He’s going to love it.”

Virgil rolls his eyes. “What do you mean? I am relaxed.”

“Virgil,” Patton says in a warning voice as he climbs the ladder, peering up on the lighting platform. 

“I know, I know,” Virgil allows as he makes an effort to uncurl himself a bit from his chair, running a hand through his purple bangs. “It's just… what if I mess this up?”

Logan types a few more commands into the ancient computer before sliding his chair back a little from the desk. “You won’t.”

“But this is Roman we’re talking about,” Virgil argues, noticing how dry his mouth feels. “Roman Prince. You know he’s been dreaming about a ‘promposal’ since he could practically walk!”

“That’s a gross exaggeration. They didn’t really get popular until…”

“What if it's not what he wants?” Virgil asks, flipping his hood up and stuffing his hands in his hoodie’s pocket.  “What if I say the wrong thing? This moment matters to him, ya know? He wants an over the top, profession of love shouted from rooftops.”

Logan sighs. “He wants you, Virgil.”

Is that what Roman wants? He would be happier with someone that was more comfortable with open flirting and expressions of romance. Why does he put up with me?

“Well… he deserves more than me,” Virgil mutters to himself as he stands, pushing in his chair. 

Patton interrupts sternly, “Now, none of that. You two are great together. Just, breathe. Trust yourself. He’s going to love it.”

“You sure?” Virgil asks, slinging his backpack onto his shoulder. He walks over to Patton, who moves over, and climbs down the ladder and onto the floor. 

“Completely,” Logan confirms as he climbs down too. “Would it help if we run through your checklist one more time?”

Virgil nods, not trusting his voice. Patton comes next to him, taking his hand and looking at him with big eyes full of hope and encouragement. 

“Okay, Ms. Martin is here to supervise?” Logan asks, pulling out his phone and the checklist he had made with Virgil when they were planning this. 

What if she thinks this is a dumb idea? Is she listening to us? What if I say something horrible? Will she laugh at me?

“Yeah,” Virgil mutters, shuffling his feet, “In the soundbooth.”

“Good,” nods Logan as he checks it off. “Are the lights set the way you want them?”

Oh god what if Roman thought the lights were dumb? Who decides to go for dramatic AND soft? Isn’t that an oxymoron?

“Yep.”

“Great. Notecards?”

What kind of dork needs notecards to ask their boyfriend to prom? Like, what a special kind of stupid, right?

Virgil reaches into his pocket and pulls out the five notecards he made earlier with Patton, and pulls them out. “Check.” 

“Calculator that Roman conveniently left behind that I am texting him to return?”

“Uh…” Virgil stutters. He doesn’t have the calculator. Roman’s parents will murder him if he looses it again. It costs over a hundred dollars and he had lost three already this year. What if they ground him?

“Oh, I have that!” Patton jumps as he reaches into his backpack, pulling out the bright pink calculator and handing it to Virgil. “We got your back, Virgil.”

“All that’s left is for us to send the text,” Logan smiles as he slides his phone into his pocket. “Are you ready?”

Virgil swallows the lump in his throat. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

“Good, because I already sent it,” Logan answers. “We’ll get out of your hair.”

“We’re rooting for you.” Patton smiles as he takes Logan’s hand.

Virgil can practically feel his heart in his throat as he watches Patton leading them out. “Thanks, guys.”

Logan looks back for just a second and Virgil gives what he hopes is a small smile of reassurance. Logan nods in acknowledgement before allowing Patton to pull him down the hall. 

Virgil slings the backpack into a seat and goes to sit on the edge of the stage to wait for Roman. He could do this. It was just Roman, right?

He leans back, laying down on the stage spread eagle, looking up at the lights above. He feels  like invisible strings are wrapped around him in a vice grip. Virgil takes three deep breaths, focusing from his stomach like the school counselor had taught him. He was going to ask Roman Prince out to their senior prom and it would all be okay. He would go through the little speech he had outlined with Logan’s help. Worst case, Roman would turn him down and he wouldn’t have to go to a dance he didn’t especially care about anyway. Best case, he would pull off a miracle and sweep Roman off of his feet. Either would be okay. Roman would be happy either going to prom with him, or he would go with someone else and have an even better time, right?

Virgil closes his eyes at the ache in his chest that thought causes, moving one hand over the pain. Of course he wants to be the one to take Roman. Of course the only acceptable option is success. He had observed Roman for so long, resigning himself to watching his Prince thrive in the spotlight while he waited in the wings. There was no way Virgil could stand someone else taking his place. This was a dumb idea. 

He pulls out the notecards from his pocket and flips through them, reading them through for about the thousandth time that day. Logan had insisted that notecards would help alleviate the stress of remembering what to say. Patton had then added his own touches with stickers and doodles along the edges to get Virgil to relax. Neither the notecards nor the pictures were being very helpful at the moment, Virgil notes as he realizes his hands are shaking holding them. 

The door to the theater opens, causing Vigril to jump up, the note cards falling as he sits upright. He blinks into the darkness of the theater and feels his breath catch as his eyes find Roman coming up the aisle, out of breath.

“Hey, Virge! Have you seen Logan? He sent me a text that he had the calculator I left in math. If I come home without it again my sister is going to gay-up murder me.”

Virgil reaches into his pocket and slides the calculator towards the edge of the stage where Roman now stands. “Yeah, here.”

“Awesome, thanks,” smiles Roman. He looks around the stage. “What were you guys setting lights for? Looks amazing.”

“Think so?” Virgil asks, suddenly very aware of how sweaty his hands are. He pulls his knees to his chest and wraps his arms around them, discreetly trying to dry them on his black denim pants. 

“Uh, yeah,” Roman answers, flashing Virgil a smile that could light up the whole stage itself. “There’s a duality that exists in it I can really get behind.”

Virgil feels ones of the invisible strings around him loosen, relaxing that Roman likes the lighting. Now for the hard part: words. 

Virgil swallows a couple of times, his tongue feeling thick. This was not a time to stop knowing how to speak. A new panic started to fill Virgil: what if I physically can’t do this?

“Hey,” Roman asks gently, “You okay?”

Virgil looks around himself and sees the cards scattered on the floor. He gets on his hands and knees, trying to scoop them up with his shaking hands, but they’re all out of order and sticking to the floor. 

This is not how this was supposed to go. I have totally messed this all up. Roman will never forgive me for not doing this right. 

Before he knows it Roman is kneeling on the stage next to him.  “Whoah, hey,” he softly calls, slowly placing a hand on Virgil’s. “I’m here. What do you need?”

Great, now I’ve upset him.

“I’m sorry,” Virgil gets out, his voice tight as he keeps his eyes trained  on the ground in front of him. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Roman states calmly. “What do you need?”

To not be wasting your time in a relationship. To be so heavily sedated that I forget this is happening. To not be such a wimp when it comes to asking you on a date. 

“I need to do this.”

“Do what?”

“This,” Virgil answers as he gestures to the cards on the floor, still not looking at Roman. 

“Oh, okay?” Roman hesitantly replies. “You’re being kind of vague.”

“Sorry,” Virgil sighs, hanging his head, trying to loosen the panic. “I’ve totally messed this up.”

There's a beat of silence before Roman picks up the nearest notecard, causing Virgil’s eyes to snap to him. He reaches for it, but Roman turns just slightly out of reach. He looks it over and reads it aloud, “I promise that I will always be there for you, never hurt you, and will defend your honor.”

Virgil freezes as he watches Roman’s reaction. There’s a moment of puzzlement behind his eyes as he mouths out the wording again before they seem to spark with realization. “I believe that is a pledge of fealty, my Dark and Stormy Knight.”

Virgil sits back at the positive response and recognition, his chest loosening at the positive reaction. “Seemed fitting for a Prince.”

“What are you trying to do, Virgil?”

“A-ask you to prom?” Virgil answers, looking away from Roman. “But it’s, it’s not going so well. I really messed up.”

“Oh Virgil.” Roman scoots closer and places a hand on Virgil’s. “Darling, you could never mess that up.”

“But you need a big promposal,” Virgil sighs. “And I can’t…”

“I don’t care about a big promposal,” Roman interrupts, gently placing his forehead against Virgil’s. 

“What?”

“I… I mean, they’re very nice. But I don’t want a big moment if it means nothing. There’s something romantic in a certain level of intimacy, right?” asks Roman. 

Virgil laughs a little in relief. “Just when I start to think I have you figured out, you do something completely unexpected.” 

Roman tilts his head just enough to kiss Virgil, soft and gentle. Virgil feels his whole body relax at the moment, silencing the repeating worry that he was used to. Before he knows it, he grabs Roman’s shirt, pulling him in closer and deepening the kiss. There’s a cough from the sound booth, causing the two to pull away just a little. 

“Sorry Ms. Martin,” Virgil calls with a laugh as Roman turns and waves at their chaperone. 

Roman stands up and offers Virgil a hand, pulling him upright. “I would love to go to prom with you, Virgil,” Roman says, pushing Virgil’s bangs out of his eyes. “No big scary shows of adoration required.”

Virgil smiles as the relief settles and he looks at Roman. “Cool.”

“Come on.” Roman takes Virgil’s hand. “A little bird told me that Patton was going to ask Logan to prom today and I’m dying to know how it went. It's about time they acknowledge their mutual pining.”

“Okay,” agrees Virgil, allowing himself to be led down the stairs to the theater.

Less than 1 week-

It's the week of prom. Senior prom season always caused a little bit of an undercurrent of excitement that permeated the atmosphere. Virgil sits in his study hall, hood flipped up trying to focus on completing a study guide for economics. However, all of the students in the room are buzzing around, whispering to one another and on their phones, showing one another everything from prom dresses to campaigns for prom court. Virgil rolls his eyes again as another girl asks their friend “why isn’t Roman running?” 

Roman had decided that he didn’t want to run for court. His grades weren’t great right now and he had many college music and theater auditions happening at the moment. The group of friends had debated the idea into the ground, ultimately with Roman agreeing that his priorities right now were not prom focused. Virgil, of course, had agreed to support Roman in whatever manner was necessary. But still, the student body was shocked. 

“Did you hear what happened at the bell with Prince?” another girl asks. Virgil stops writing, suddenly interested in the conversation. Without moving his head, Virgil looks up in the direction of the girls who had pulled their desks into a circle. 

“No, what happened?”

“Check Claire’s Snapstory,” the first girl says. “She got some of it on camera before a teacher got in her way.”

Virgil pauses for a moment before he feels his phone vibrate in his hoodie pocket. He pulls it out and sees the banner “Text: Patton” he opens it up and reads the text.

“Something happened with Logan, Roman, and JD. Don’t know what, they sent me out of the office, but security was with them.”

Virgil feels his stomach drop. JD, Virgil’s cousin, never meant anything good. And security only meant trouble. 

He wasn’t aware of when he stood up, but he finds himself walking towards the sign out sheet, stuffing his belongings in his backpack. As a senior, he could technically go home now if he wanted to, so he marks the signout sheet as such. 

Virgil walks deliberately as his brain swims at the information provided. There was a video, two friends, one enemy (if Virgil had one of those), and security. He needs answers. He needs to know that his friends are okay. And even if he were to text them, he wouldn’t believe it until he saw them with his own two eyes. 

He turns the corner towards the office when he stops suddenly. He pulls back instinctively as his eyes follow JD and his aunt, JD’s mother. JD has his head down, holding his wrist with the opposite hand. His mother walks in front, her designer bag over her arm as she types a text on her phone, her heels clicking with each step. “Come along, Janus, darling. We have to go to the store to replace that phone before it hits rush hour.”

JD looks up, sweeping the area around him. His eyes land on Virgil, causing something to spark behind them that Virgil can’t place. The emo holds his gaze, refusing to back down and show unease at his cousin. He takes a step forward and JD speeds up, walking next to his mother now. Virgil inwardly takes pride in the reaction. JD wasn’t afraid of much, so he’ll take the victory where he can. 

As soon as his aunt and cousin are out of the main door, Logan emerges from the office. Virgil runs over to him, noticing the glasses missing from Logan’s face. 

“Hey,” Virgil greets as his eyes scan his friend over. Logan looks tired, his hair more tousled than usual. His shirt hangs partially untucked and his tie was just hanging loosely around his neck. Virgil can clearly see the dark circles from working overtime getting ready for exams that usually are hidden by his glasses. 

“Hello, Virgil,” Logan says flatly, looking at his hand that was holding his clearly broken glasses. 

“What happened?”

There’s a sigh before Logan responds, “Don’t worry about it.”

Virgil shakes his head. “You know I can’t.” 

There’s another pause before Logan says quietly, “It's not my place, Virgil.”

Virgil doesn’t miss the pauses in Logan’s responses. He’s being overly cautious, the emo notices. “Are you okay, at least?” Virgil asks, matching Logan’s tone. 

“I’m fine,” Logan says, his eyes still focused on the crushed glasses in his hand. “I cannot say the same for these, however. I’m sorry, Virgil, but I have to get going. My sister was just called from class to take me to get them repaired.”

“Yeah, totally.” Virgil nods. 

The door to the office swings open again. Logan’s hand grabs Virgil’s shoulder and pulls him against the wall, out of the walkway. A husband and wife walk through the door, and Virgil’s stomach drops: it’s Roman’s parents. His mom’s lips are pressed firmly together, her eyes trained in front of her. While she was always a beautiful woman, there’s an almost fire behind her eyes that scream to watch out. Roman could get the same look when his friends were threatened. His father, a burly man, walks next to her, shaking his head with a defeated look etched in his features. 

A security officer, Officer Ward, comes out and Virgil recognizes him from when the man helped with a couple of set builds for the theater. Virgil’s chest tightens as he sees Roman next to the man, looking small against the large frame of his father and even larger one of Officer Ward. 

Roman is staring at the floor while he walks, not blinking. Virgil can see the start of a bruise on Roman’s jaw and his heart breaks. Roman doesn’t look up or even seem to realize two of his best friends are standing right next to him. Virgil starts to reach, but Logan digs his fingers into Virge’s shoulder while shaking his head ever so slightly. He drops his hand and watches as the officer leads them outside of the main glass doors. He says something to Roman, who nods, before shaking hands with Mr. and Mrs. Prince and heading down the sidewalk, probably to do a last check of the premises before the day is officially over. 

Virgil moves Logan’s hand off of his shoulder and walks towards the door after it closes, separating them from the Prince family. Virgil can’t help but ask again, “What happened?”

Logan joins him, watching as Roman’s parents say something to their son, who seems to deflate even more. He takes Virgil’s hand and gives a gentle squeeze as a familiar car pulls up in front of the school, Logan’s sister sitting in the driver’s seat. “I have to go. But we’ll be okay, Virge.”

“What happened?” Virgil asks another time, desperate for answers as to why his boyfriend was standing outside with his parents looking smaller than Virgil had ever known him to be. 

“He’ll tell you when he’s ready,” Logan says as he pushes open the door and starts walking towards the car. He gets to where the Prince family is standing, says something to Roman’s parents, his mom nodding and his father offering a handshake. Logan says something to Roman before getting in the car and driving off. 

Virgil stands and watches as Roman and his parents continue to talk, his mother getting more agitated as she goes back and forth with her son. After a moment, Roman’s dad puts a hand on his wife’s shoulder and starts ushering her towards the guest parking lot. Roman hangs his head before turning in the opposite direction towards the student parking. 

Virgil doesn’t remember when he started running. When he gets to the edge of the parking lot sees Roman fumbling with his keys next to his red Ford, “Roman!”

Roman stops with the keys, but doesnt turn around. “Not now, Virgil.”

“Are you okay?” Virgil asks, out of breath. “What happened?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Roman sighs, starting to shuffle through his keys again. “None of it matters.”

“Why?” Virgil demands, clenching his fist at his side. “I don’t understand what’s going on! Logan wouldn’t tell me anything!”

Roman drops his keys on the ground as he presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, “I really messed up, Virge. I lost my cool and let him get the best of me.”

Virgil quickly bends down and picks up the keys from where they had bounced. “Who? JD? Whatever it was, I know he started it.”

“Not ac-cording to the school,” Roman says, his voice breaking. Virgil’s eyes grow at just how defeated he sounds.

“We all know how he is,” Virgil responds, shoving the keys in his pocket. “They can’t be serious.”

“It’s on camera.” Roman’s shoulders start shaking, as his voice takes on a harsher tone, tilting his head back looking towards the sky. “God, I played right into his hand.”

Virgil quickly moves himself around Roman so that he’s now facing him. “Hey, it’ll be okay, Ro.”

“I’m suspended, Virgil!” Roman shouts, finally lowering his gaze to meet Virgil’s, challenging him to argue. “Five days. And I have to replace his phone. And they took prom.”

“What?”

“I can’t go to prom. Our senior prom!” he looks away again, tears falling, unable to contain themselves. “God, you must hate me. First I make you feel like you have to do some big thing just to ask me, now I can’t even go.”

Virgil’s gut twists, “Listen…”

“And Logan gets roped into the no prom group for just trying to break up the fight!” Roman sobs, sinking to his knees as he clutches his car to slow his fall. “He must be crushed. And what about Patton? You all must despise me. And rightfully so.”

“Stop…”

“I should have just done what he wanted. What would one statement hurt? I could have avoided this whole mess. And now everyone that I care about hates me.”

“Shut up!”  Virgil shouts, anger coming back in a flash. “Just shut up, for one minute. You are not allowed to put words in my mouth, Princey. Ever.”

The sudden outburst of anger stuns Roman for a moment. Virgil immediately feels guilty for his outburst. The last thing Roman needed right now was to be yelled at from someone he should be able to open up to. Virgil takes a deep breath before sinking down to eye level with Roman, “Listen to me, I don’t care about prom. Like, at all. If you’re not going, I’m not going. It’s that easy. And while I can’t speak for Patton and Logan, I am sure that whatever they’re feeling, it isn’t hatred. Not for you. Not ever.”

Virgil offers a hand to Roman, who takes it, tears still falling. The anxious teen pulls Roman in and lets Roman collapse in his lap as he strokes his hair. Roman had done this exact thing to him so many times, Virgil was almost glad to get to return the favor for once. 

“Hey,” Virgil says softly after a moment, “I don’t know that the fight was about. At this point, it doesn’t matter. What I do know is that you, Roman Prince, are not one to fight without just cause. You are not the bad guy in this story. I won’t let you. That’s my job.”

That earns a small chuckle from Roman, calming the storm of worry inside Virgil just a little. They stay there for a minute, Virgil just holding Roman as he pulls himself together. Virgil focuses on keeping his breathing steady, smoothing circular motions on Roman’s back. He slowly stops crying, pulling himself together. 

“What are we going to do?” Roman eventually asks.

“Are you able to drive home?” Virgil asks, his brain switching into recovery protocol. His therapist had practically drilled it into him when they talked about how to handle his anxiety attacks, and they seemed to work well for all different kinds of crisis recovery. 

Roman sighs. “… I want to be.”

“But you aren’t. That’s okay. I’ll drive,” Virgil nods. “So here’s our three steps…”

Roman chuckles as he pulls away from Virgil, sitting up straight, “Are you like Picani’s star pupil or something?”

Virgil rolls his eyes. “Hush, you know you feel better knowing I’m talking to a therapist. Okay, step one is we’re going to get in the car.”

“You still have last period.”

Virgil waves his hand dismissively. “I signed myself out ages ago. If you thought I was going to sit still for a study hall when my boyfriend was in trouble, you clearly don’t know who you’re talking to. I made a pledge to always be there for you and I meant it.”

“I thought it was my job to protect you,” Roman quips with a raise of an eyebrow. Virgil’s unease settles more at the jest. If Roman was poking fun in a light hearted manner, it meant he was coming around. 

“Last time I checked,” replies Virgil as he stands up and offers Roman a hand, “A knight is expected to stay by his Prince’s side. That’s part of the whole fealty thing, right? Or did I totally miss what Logan was trying to tell me?”

“Okay, okay,” Roman allows with a soft smile. “Step one, car. Step two?”

“Step two, I’ll drive you home.”

“Are you sure-”

“Yes. I got it. Step three-”

“I get to kiss you,” Roman says as he grabs Virgil’s hoodie and pulls him close, kissing him softly, gently, as if trying to say something Virgil can’t quite place. When they pull apart, Virgil can’t help but smile. 

“I mean, sure,” Virgil laughs. “But you’re doing it out of order.”

“Let’s get out of here. I technically can’t be on property anyway.”

Virgil nods, “Okay,” and unlocks the car. As Roman walks to the other side of the vehicle, Virgil’s brain is already starting to figure out a way to make Roman feel better when it comes time for prom. 

-1 hour-

Virgil stands holding the bottom of the ladder while Patton reaches to get the string of Christmas lights through the last hook to attach them to the house. Patton’s parents had graciously allowed the boys to use their backyard for their master plan to make Logan and Roman feel better about the loss of their prom. 

When Virgil had gotten home after driving Roman home, he immediately called Patton and started planning this alternative prom. Patton was all over the idea before Virgil had even finished explaining his ideas. And over the past few hours, all of their hard work had finally come together. 

“There, how does that look?” Patton asks, backing down the ladder. 

Virgil looks around the brick patio in the dying light and squints, “Kind of hard to tell without the lights plugged in.”

“Right,” Patton smiles, walking over to the light switch by the door and flipping it. The whole yard is then awash in a warm glow. Lights outline the house features, windows and doors. They stretch across the ground along the flowerbeds under the windows to the fence, where they twist through the whole perimeter of the backyard. Twinkling lights are woven through the pergola, softly adding a shimmering effect to the whole yard. 

“Whoah,” Virgil whispers as he takes it all in. The patio furniture sits in the yard, clearing the patio except for the large speakers synced up to Patton’s phone. The long picnic table sits off to the side of the yard with punch and snacks all spread out. “It looks great, Patton.”

“Are you sure it looks bright enough?“ asks Patton. “I could go get another strand.”

“What? No. Why do your Dads have so many Christmas lights in the first place?” 

“You mean you don’t?”

Virgil shrugs.  “We just don’t. Bought the house spotlights in green and red, calling that a day.”

“Oh those are cute,” Patton muses, walking over to the speakers. “Should we start these up?”

“Good idea,” Virgil agrees. “That playlist is like 10 hours long anyway.”

Patton presses a couple of things on his phone before soft music starts playing. It takes a moment before Virigl can place it: Suddenly Seymour from Little Shop of Horrors. Virgil smiles softly at the memories from that show come to him. It was the musical his and Roman’s freshman year. Patton and Virgil had spent hours both of them pulling music to put on their own personalized prom playlist: pop songs that drove them crazy from over use, songs from shows they had been in, songs they loved to sing in their cars, songs that just reminded them of Roman and Logan. 

“And we are in business,” Patton puts the phone in his pocket, having set the volume loud enough to be heard, but soft enough that they could easily talk over top of it. 

“Sweet,” Virgil comments, checking his watch. Any minute now. 

Patton walks over to Virgil and smiles, “Can I fuss?”

Virgil rolls his eyes, “Okay, dad.”

Patton reaches up and starts straightening Virgil’s purple skinny tie. It matches his favorite purple Converse which he had insisting on wearing. Patton flattens it and tucks it into the black vest, adjusting the collar of the white button down to let it cooperate. “There. Much better. Where’s your jacket?” 

Virgil pushes the cuffs up his arm to his elbow, having rolled them up while setting up, nodding to the black jacket that matches his pants on the chair just inside the door, “Inside. It's too hot out here for it.”

“Fair enough,” Patton nods. He’s wearing a light blue suit that really makes his eyes pop. Virgil can’t help but smile and return the favor of fixing his tie, a darker almost navy blue. Not many people could pull off the light blue, but it just makes sense for Patton, Virgil thinks.

“Hello?” Logan’s voice comes accompanied by the click of the gate opening. Logan and Roman walk into the yard, their eyes large as they take in the scene. Virigl’s breath catches as he takes Roman in. Roman has a dark maroon suit on with a white button up and a gold tie. It was the perfect outfit for Roman, demanding attention but for all of the right reasons. Virgil can’t help but notice that while Roman seemed put together, he was lacking in usual spark. Something wasn’t quite right about him, something in his eyes. Roman’s eyes find Virgil’s, and Virgil is suddenly very aware of his ears burning. 

He breaks Roman’s gaze and looks over at Logan, and a smirk forms. Of course he and Patton would end up in complementary looks. Where Patton was in a lighter blue suit with a dark blue tie, Logan was in the opposite with a dark suit and lighter tie. 

“Oh, you’re here!” squeals Patton as he runs over to greet them, Virgil following behind him. 

“What is all of this?” asks Roman, his eyes sparkling. “Mom wouldn’t tell me anything, just pushed me into this and then into the car to pick up Logan.”

“It was all Virgil’s idea.” Patton beams as he takes Logan and Roman by the hand, pulling them further in so they can see the whole space. “If you can’t go to prom, we would bring prom to you. Or, as much as we can, anyway.”

Virgil looks at his shoes, feeling his face turn warm. “Patton came up with most of the plan, really. I just had a few suggestions.”

“You two--” Roman swings an arm around Virgil and the other around Patton, wrapping them in a hug-- “are the absolute sweetest. You didn’t have to do all of this.”

Patton returns the hug. “Of course we did. You two deserve this.”

Logan joins the group, taking Patton’s hand and giving it a squeeze. “It is very thoughtful of you. Both of you,” he adds, catching Virgil’s eye with a smile. 

The song changes to Footloose, making Roman jump in recognition. “Oh my gosh I loved this show!”

Virgil smirks at the memories behind the spotlight for tech crew. It was their sophomore year, over the summer. “I made sure it got on the playlist.”

Roman starts pulling away from the group, keeping Patton’s hand. “Come on, Pat. You have to remember this dance!”

“Of course I do,” Patton giggles as he and Roman break into the show’s choreography.

Virgil smiles, watching them dance. He feels his chest settle a little at the light in Roman sparking. Virgil had been worried this week, noticing the dark circles under Roman’s eyes increasing with each night. He hadn’t been himself. Something was eating away at his Prince, but Roman kept pushing him away, denying the issue. 

“Logan?” Virgil finally asks. 

“Hm?”

“Can… can you tell me what happened.. Yet?” He hates asking again. But the worry is always present. 

Logan sighs, turning his attention from Patton and Roman, making eye contact with Virgil. “Are you sure you want to know?”

“I… I just want to know how to help,” holding the contact. 

Logan looks back at the two dancing. “He was just trying to protect you, Virgil.”

“Protect me?” Virgil asks, almost offended. “From what?”

“Your cousin, JD.”

“I can handle JD,” insists Virgil. “Why would Roman get involved?”

“He wanted Roman to help Remus’ campaign for prom court.”

Virgil’s eyes widen at the absurdity of the idea. Remus Duke was a fellow senior classmate who was chaotic and dangerous. The guy has tried to set fire to theater sets when he wasn’t cast in shows, harrasses students, and has caused chaos at numerous football games. 

“Why?”

Logan adjusts his glasses. “I don’t have to tell you how popular Prince is with his classmates. His decision to not run, while I fully support it, meant that students were lost with where to go. Roman throwing support may turn the tide, much like when presidential nominees may be supported by their enemies after they drop out.”

“Right.” Virgil’s brow furrows as he tries to think through his cousin’s actions, “So JD asked for support, Roman said no, probably because Remus is a hazard to society.”

Logan rolls his eyes. “Yes.”

“So where does the fight come in?”

“JD made a threat to try and force Roman’s hand,” Logan slowly explains, fidgeting with his tie. Virgil knows Logan well enough to pick up on the nervous habit. “JD took it two steps too far and Roman went after him.”

“What threat?” Virgil demands, clenching a fist at his side. How dare his cousin threaten Roman. 

There’s a heavy, weighted pause, before Logan answers softly, “He threatened to out you, Virgil.” 

Everything stops for Virgil. It isn’t like he had never thought about coming out fully. At school he is kind of out. It isn’t like he hid his relationship with Roman to the theater kids. Most other kids pay no attention to him anyway and couldn’t believe the Roman Prince would be with someone so opposite of himself. 

But at home? At home he wasn’t out. He couldn’t be. Not without significant risk of repercussion. He always thought he and JD understood one another though. They were never friends, Virgil would say. But JD seemed to not mind giving Virgil his space at school. Virgil had never thought about JD being a risk for Virgil, especially in such an underhanded way. Would JD manipulate Virgil if it meant getting what he wanted, yes. But this? Threatening to out him? JD couldn’t be that underhanded, could he? It must have been a bluff.

“Obviously Roman wouldn’t let your safety be at risk,” Logan continued, pulling Virgil back to Earth. “So when JD pulled out his phone, Roman went after it.”

“If JD pulled out the phone…” Virgil’s certainty of the bluff crashes to zero. He feels his temper rising. “Shit. Why?”

“I assure you, I don’t know,” Logan admits. “It seems oddly ‘Aaron Burr’ for your cousin.”

Virgil’s mind spins with anger. “Why didn’t he just tell someone? If he was bated into it, wouldn’t the school go easier on Roman?”

Logan shakes his head. “Roman’s only goal through this has been to protect you. He wouldn’t tell them what JD did, because to do so would out you anyway, allowing JD to win to an extent.”

Virgil swallows, his eyes stinging a little in frustration. He takes a few deep breaths, calming himself a little. This is why Roman wouldn’t tell him what happened: he was worried Virgil would get upset. Virgil could handle this. 

Logan places a hand gently, reassuringly on Virgil’s shoulder. Virgil looks at him. Logan smiles a little. “It's okay, Virgil. What's done is done.”

Virgil nods, feeling a little better with the reassurance from Logan. Logan was one of Virgil’s favorite people. He could count on Logan to be there to tell him the truth when he needed it, but he also didn’t sugar coat it. Logan was a good friend to have by your side in a hard time. Virgil smiles a little as he finally realizes, “You tried to pull Roman off of him, didn’t you?”

“After Roman got in a few good punches, yes.” Logan smirks, something flashing in his eyes too fast for Virgil to identify. “I had to try to stop Roman or he might have seriously injured your cousin. But the school has a zero tolerance policy when it comes to fights.”

“I’m sorry you got roped into it.”

“I’m not.”

The song ends, leading to Patton and Roman collapsing in giggles on the dance floor. Virgil takes a deep breath, noticing the tension releasing with the knowledge of what happened. Of knowing that Roman would be ok. 

“Thank you, Logan. For telling me. And for having his back.”

“Any time,” nods Logan. “Come on, let’s get our stage kids off the floor before they ruin their outfits.” 

“Hello!” a familiar voice shouts, causing the four boys to turn towards the gate.

“Leo! Terrance! You guys made it!” Patton squeals in excitement at the sight of their friends. He helps Roman to his feet before running to greet the newcomers. Behind them, Virgil can see lots of other theater kids walking up the path all dressed for prom, although slightly disheveled. 

“Where are they?” Adri calls. “Ah, our favorite delinquents!” 

“Logan and Roman! Long time no see!” Camden says, making a show of looking around. 

“What’s going on?” asks Roman, his face lighting up as he sees his friends pouring in. 

“We told you,” Virgil says, walking up next to him. “Since you guys couldn’t go to prom, we brought prom to you.”

Roman looks at Virgil, opening and closing his mouth with nothing coming out. Virgil smirks at that and continues, “Obviously we didn’t want to ask them to skip prom entirely. We’re hosting the after party.”

“And we left as soon as we could,” Valerie says, walking past them. “Wouldn’t be prom without you, Prince.”

“You guys,” Roman squeals in excitement. Virgil can’t help but feel the excitement too. Roman finally looks like himself again: the familiar glow, the magnetic force, the dazzling smile. He stands tall again, looking perfect in his suit. 

Virgil nudges Roman with his shoulder. “Go socialize. You haven’t seen these guys all week.”

“But I haven’t spent any time with you,” Roman says softly. 

Virgil laughs. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Roman!” Kenny shouts, waving him over. “Get over here, I want a pic.”

Roman looks once again at Virgil, who smiles in reassurance, before running to the group. Virgil stays towards the gate, watching as the yard becomes more and more populated. He laughs a little when he notices a couple of freshmen from the theater in the mix. Seems as if everyone wanted to be a part of the celebration. 

Virgil watches as Roman walks around, taking time to greet every person. Politicians wish they could be as popular as Roman, Virgil thinks. Always with the best intentions, making everyone feel special in their own way. It was no wonder Remus wanted Roman on his side for the election.

Virgil fidgets at the thought of the cause of the fight. He didn’t need Roman to protect him. He had dealt with his cousin long before Roman was a part of his life. JD wasn’t a bad guy, he just determined. He even had probably been calling Roman’s bluff with the phone… probably. When JD was determined there was nothing he wouldn’t do to get his way. Virgil solved this generally by staying out of the way. JD only became an issue if you were in the way. And apparently Roman had opted to get in the way, drawing a target on his head.

“Is this thing on?” Patton asks, tapping a mic that he had hooked into the speakers. “Oh great. Can I have everyone’s attention, please?”

All of the teens settled down, pooling on the dance floor. Virgil is amazed to see how many people were there, at least two hundred. Theater kids, band kids, choir kids and a few other students all mixed together. It shouldn’t have surprised him. Virgil knew there was lots of overlap in these musically inclined groups. But to see them all in one place with their dates is impressive. 

“Okay, great,” Patton chirps. “I just wanted to take a moment, on the behalf of myself and Virgil, to thank you all for coming to this little get together to celebrate Logan and Roman.”

There’s a cheer from the crowd which causes Virgil’s heart to swell. It is nice to see the group support their boys. 

Patton passes the mic to Joan. They wave at the crowd to try and hush the sound that grew when they took the stage, “Alright, alright. You gotta let me tell them.”

After a moment the crowd quiets, although there is an almost electric current running under the surface, much like the one before a curtain is pulled for opening night. “Thank you,” Joan nods as they turn towards Roman and Logan, who have been pushed to the front of the crowd. “Logan and Roman, we the students would like to thank you for your service as part of our community this past year. Logan, for your awesome tech skills as well as study help. Roman, for always being a source of entertainment for us.”

Cheers erupt again. Thomas walks up and mutters something to Joan, who laughs, before taking the mic. 

There are a few whoops before Thomas dramatically starts, “Story Time! The Prince decides not to run for King. The people are disappointed. They start talking. Then the Prince is removed from the kingdom, with his faithful Paladin, causing anger in the land.” Virgil snickers at the reference of Logan being a Paladin. The group had played a round of Dungeons and Dragons once that was centered around Roman’s last name. Clearly Thomas was borrowing the concept yet again. 

“But the people are smart,” Thomas continues. “They hatch a plan, unknown to the Prince’s healer and knight, to get the Prince his throne.”

Now this was news to Virgil. He took a few steps towards the group, now curious where this was all headed. 

“Ladies and gentlemen, as most of you are aware, tonight we crowned a Prom King. We all agreed to vote for our candidate that would pass the crown on to the rightful ruler,” Thomas explains as someone in the crowd hands him a golden crown. “It is my pleasure to pass the title on to its rightful holder. Prince, I believe this is yours.”

Virgil fills with a mixture of shock, pride, and relief as he watches the crowd explode into cheers. While he stood by Roman’s choice not to run, he is so relieved to see Roman graciously accept the role from his friends. It just made sense. 

Patton appears out of nowhere and takes Virgil’s hand, leading him through the crowd that seems to part for them. Virgil doesn’t even have time to process what is happening before he realizes his hand is now held by Roman, the golden crown on his head. 

“May I have this dance,” Roman asks, bowing deeply, a twinkle in his eye that catches Virgil’s attention. Virgil nods and allows Roman to pull him in as a soft song starts playing. Oh right, Prom King normally dances with his date for a song, don’t they?

Roman smiles at him as they start swaying together. “There’s my Knight. Finally a moment together.”

Virgil can’t help but notice the people around them, the space they are occupying, the eyes following them. “How do you do this on a stage?” Virgil asks quietly. “Dance with everyone watching?”

“Oh easy,” Roman answers, flawlessly twisting the two of them around the floor. “You forget they exist. Merely part of the background. In my world, it's just us. I can’t even see Logan wrapping his arm around Patton’s waist right now, what are you talking about?”

Virgil chuckles as Roman expertly maneuvers Virgil so he can see what Roman is talking about. Sure enough, Logan is standing behind Patton, his arms wrapped around Patton’s waist as they watch, swaying slightly in place while Patton closes his eyes. It was a sweet moment between the two. If only it could have happened at the actual prom.

“Roman?” Virgil asks after a moment. 

“Yes?” he answers, pulling away just far enough to see Virgil’s face. 

Virgil meets his gaze. “You know you don’t have to protect me, right?”

Roman’s eyes give him away. “What are you talking about?”

“Logan told me what happened,” Virgil admits softly. 

Roman pulls him closer so that Virgil can’t see his face, spinning slowly. 

“I can handle myself, is all I’m saying,” Virgil tries again after a moment. 

“Of course,” Roman nods before pulling back again, his brow pulled together. “I know that. I never meant to insinuate that you couldn’t. I just… hang on.”

The song ends as the crowd applauds before the next song kicks on. Its something upbeat, but Virgil isn’t paying attention. He’s too busy trying to read Roman’s expression as the Prom King pulls him from the middle of the crowd to a darker corner of the yard. Roman doesn’t drop his hand or his gaze, as if trying to hold the moment while getting out of a public setting. Once out of the way, Roman looks at their hands still together. 

“Virgil, you know when you asked me to prom you had that whole pledge of fealty as part of it?”

“Right,” Virgil nods. 

“Well,” Roman explains, his brow pulled together in thought. “It’s part of feudalism from the middle ages, right? I remember you said Logan helped you with it. He must’ve explained it. Anyway, a person swore to a lord that they would do them no harm, that they would be honorable and keep them safe and everything you wrote for me back then.”

“I remember.” Virgil smiles softly. “I still stand by that.”

“I know.” Roman returns the smile. “But there’s part of it that people seem to forget. The people would do this for their lord, but it wasn’t a one way street. The lord was bound by the same principles in return.”

“Okay,” responds Virgil slowly. 

“All I did was uphold my end of the promise. And I would do it again,” says Roman, pushing Virgil’s bangs out of his eyes. 

Virgil leans into the touch, “I… I just don’t want you to get hurt because of me.”

“I think you’ll find I can handle myself too,” Roman smiles. 

Virgil rolls his eyes and reaches up to straighten Roman’s crown, “Okay. Fair enough.”

Virgil isn’t sure which of them pulls the other, but he finds himself kissing his Prince. Softly, melting into one another. Roman wraps an arm around Virgil and pulls him gently into it, deepening the moment just a little. Virgil embraces it for a moment before he pulls back, smiling. 

“Come on,” Virgil whispers, breathless for a moment, pressing his forehead against Roman’s. “As much as I want to keep you to myself, you do have an adoring public that is waiting for you to lead them in some kind of line dance, I am sure.”

“Only if you come with me,” Roman answers, his smile radiating its normal light once again.

“Uh, I don’t dance,” Virgil scoffs. 

“Just one, please? It's our senior prom,” Roman pleads, making puppy dog eyes. “What about the Cha-cha slide?”

“Only if you can convince Logan to do it too,” Virgil answers. 

“Challenge accepted. He’ll hear his King out, I am sure,” Roman agrees, taking Virgil’s hand. “Are you coming with me?”

“Always.

[violetwolfraven]

A sudden revelation came to me : the big twin besties!!! Davey Sarah Mike Ike would be chaos if they’re together but that is okay bcs we love them. That is all thank you💕

They would!! I’m gonna do them in modern AU, so I hope that’s okay, Rai!!

This is going to be pure chaos. Nothing else. Literally no part of this is serious. It’s just pure dumbassery among friends.

Also Les definitely does dance competitions. He goes to the same studio as Race. He competes in a mini division and he does tap and hip hop and his group wins. Fight me.

Tw: swearing.

...

“Davey, pop the popcorn faster!” Sarah hollered from the living room.

“Sarah, shut the fuck up!” Davey hollered back. He loved his sister, but she annoyed the hell out of him.

Well, Les did, too. He guessed it was a sibling thing in general, but there was something about knowing someone since before birth that gave you a special ability to get on their nerves.

Plus, it wasn’t like he could make the microwave work any faster.

“What are we watching tonight?” he called while he waited.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Sarah shouted indignantly.

At the same time, Mike yelled, “We’re binge-watchin’ Liv and Maddie!”

“Oh, of course! That’s so fuckin’ obvious!” Davey shook his head, wishing he could stop himself from smiling as he muttered to himself, “We’re such huge fucking dorks.”

They were, of course, watching Liv and Maddie because they were two sets of twins left alone in a house for the night, and that tv show was about a pair of twins. The Jacobs parents were taking Les to a dance competition and the Guzman parents were going to a wedding.

Honestly, Davey was pretty sure they’d left them all together because out of the four of them, Sarah was the only good cook, Mike was the only good driver, Ike was the one who knew how to operate a can opener, and Davey was the one with common sense. Together, they formed a fully-functional teenager.

Also, they all already had partners, so the parents trusted them to be left alone all night together, unlike when Sarah and Ike asked if they could have Jojo, Hotshot, Katherine, and Jack over, too.

Davey heard the TV start up and silently willed the microwave to work faster.

“Ya can’t start without Davey, Sar—“

“Ike, I don’t know how to break this to ya, but I don’t give a shit.”

Honestly, Davey had expected that, “Thanks for tryin’, Ike!”

“No problem, Dave!”

The popcorn finally finished popping, and Davey grabbed the huge bag of M&Ms on the way out of the kitchen with it before going to join his sister and friends in watching Liv and Maddie’s shenanigans.

Ah yes. The ultimate twin night. Admittedly, the feral energy of all four of them was better than it would’ve been if it was just him and Sarah.

And Ike was smirking at his phone, which of course meant Davey had to tease him.

“Textin’ Hotshot, huh?” he asked, poking him in the shoulder.

Ike batted his hand away, “Shut up.”

Mike laughed, “Ooh, that means there’s somethin’ to hide.”

Sarah slung an arm around his shoulders, “Are you gonna fight? Cause I honestly can’t decide who’d win.”

“Nope,” Davey said automatically, “Can’t do that. We can’t have any death matches destroying the living room or our folks will never let us do this again.”

“I guess the blood would ruin your carpet.”

“Well, Mikey, it’s not like I don’t know how to get blood out of things.”

“Why—oh. Okay.”

Sarah laughed maniacally at the look on his face. It wasn’t that he looked grossed out or anything, just kind of surprised to be thinking about it.

Davey was pretty familiar with having to grab spare pads from the hall closet if the bathroom ran out and tagging along on milkshake runs during Sarah’s time of month, but he guessed a boy without sisters wouldn’t have to think about that kind of thing.

“So, how are things with Hotshot?” he asked, changing the subject.

Ike shrugged, “Good. How’s Jack?”

“He’s over here like, all the time,” Sarah said, rolling her eyes, “Or Davey’s over there. It’s cute in a gross way.”

“Fight me, Sarah. You’re the same way with Katherine.”

“Bitch—“

“Stuff with Jojo is good, by the way,” Mike chimed in, “God, I love him.”

“We get it, you’re cute, now shut up.”

Sarah swatted him, “That’s not very nice, Isaac.”

“Yeah, those are bold words from someone who’s baby pictures I have access to,” Mike agreed.

“You wouldn’t.”

“Try me, bitch.”

“Again, we can’t have a death match without destroying stuff,” Davey reminded them, “So can we just kick back and watch our show?”

Ike butted his head against Davey’s shoulder like a cat affectionately, “We should skip forward a couple seasons so we can watch Liv and Holden break up and cry.”

“No,” Sarah said immediately, “My eyeliner looks really good today.”

“You’re at a sleepover,” Davey pointed out, “Why did you even do your eyeliner?”

“David, I swear to God.”

“You swear to God what?”

“Don’t listen to him,” Mike said, reaching over to hug her, “You look fuckin’ amazing and you and Kathy usually make the rest of us look like slobs.”

“Aw, thanks Michael.”

“Don’t call me Michael.”

They actually managed to watch about half the episode without talking, before Ike shattered the silence.

“Okay, but do we think Joey’s gay?”

“I think Willow’s obsession with him is creepy and it’s super questionable how the writers played it off for laughs,” Mike admitted, “I think Joey does like girls, though. He has chemistry with a few different girls for like one episode each.”

“But he definitely has a thing for Josh in the later seasons,” Sarah pointed out.

“Oh, yeah. Good point. Maybe he’s bi or pan.”

Davey had never thought he’d have a conversation like this, but he had to admit they had a point.

“Maddie and Willow would’ve made a cute couple,” he said, “Maddie can’t drive. That alone is proof she’s not straight. And Liv had chemistry with Holden, but she would’ve been cute with Andie, too.”

“Oh, preach, bro,” Ike agreed, “And I think one of my first crushes when I was in middle school was actually on Parker from Liv and Maddie, so...”

“Parker’s bi and ace,” Mike said immediately, “I’m callin’ it. I don’t even need any evidence; just by vibes. He’s just this bi-ace mad scientist.”

“But seriously,” Sarah insisted, “Joey had a thing for Josh and I think it was requited.”

Davey rolled his eyes, “Duh. Was that ever up for debate after that one episode where the only thing that made Josh feel better about his breakup with Maddie was Joey?”

“So in short, none of the Rooney siblings are straight,” Mike concluded.

“Yup.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Yes.”

Davey smirked, “Kinda like how none of the siblings in this room are straight.”

“Aw,” Mike grinned, “Are you sayin’ you sees Ike and I as siblings?”

“More like we’re all in a cult and we call each other siblings, Brother Mike.”

“Oh yes of course, Brother Davey.”

“You’re both ridiculous.”

“Are you actin’ like you have custody of the brain cell, Sister Sarah?”

“No, of course not, Brother Ike. Brother Davey has it. He just never uses it.”

“I use the brain cell frequently, thank you very much,” Davey said indignantly, “Just not in conversations with people who don’t even have one.”

“Oh, burn!” Ike shouted, and Davey accepted a high five.

It looked like Sarah didn’t have anything to say to that. Probably because she didn’t have the brain cell.

Whatever. If the Rooney siblings could survive with only one brain cell, which the youngest sibling always had, Davey was pretty sure the four of them could, too.

...

This probably makes no sense if you’ve never seen Liv and Maddie. I’m sorry.

[loufuckers]

when she talks (i hear the revolution)

And look, she isn't dumb, okay? She knows what she looks like, what with the small chest and broad shoulders, how she looks with her short hair she asked Alex to cut with his razor last summer after a fight with her mom, the men's flannels with baggy jeans. She's known since Andrew Williams from her 8th grade History class told their entire grade she was a dyke after he catched her looking at an old Playboy magazine behind the bleachers. She knows.

or

The one where Bobby and Reggie are lesbians and maybe Bobby should love herself a little bit more.

Read on AO3

for eris (@molinajulie) , who didn't ask for this but whom i love dearly. thanks for introducing me to this show and loving bobby as much as i do.

Bobbi's uncomfortable the moment she gets inside the club.

This isn't their usual scene and although it's not that different from the grimy, underground places Sunset Curve usually plays at, it's new enough that it has her constantly looking over her shoulder and jumping a little bit every time someone stands just a little too close.

After their last bassist, some dude named Austin who was just mediocre enough and a little too much of an asshole to Alex for anyone to truly care about him, had quit the band two weeks ago, Luke had insisted they do the club rounds, check what the L.A. music scene had to offer and hopefully snatch a new bassist for themselves before their next gig.

They've not been successful, so far. There's lots of talented bassists, this is L.A. after all, but they're either too enamored of their own bands to give their offer a chance, aren't into Sunset Curve's sound, or just straight up don't like the idea of being in a band with a woman. Bobbi doesn't care about men's comfort enough for her to be offended when they give her a once over with a frowned brow and ask Luke if he's sure that's the kind of band he wants to be part of, but when it's the girls who do it... Well that just hurts.

And look, she isn't dumb, okay? She knows what she looks like, what with the small chest and broad shoulders, how she looks with her short hair she asked Alex to cut with his razor last summer after a fight with her mom, the men's flannels with baggy jeans. She's known since Andrew Williams from her 8th grade History class told their entire grade she was a dyke after he catch her looking at an old Playboy magazine behind the bleachers. She knows.

It doesn't make it any better, knowing, when she has to pitch her voice a couple octaves higher that usual when talking to a girl she doesn't know yet so they don't get scared of her or think she's flirting with them. And it sure as fuck doesn't make it better when bassists would rather stay with their shitty, dead-end bands playing underground clubs and illegal parties than be in a band with someone like Bobbi. With Bobbi.

"Did you came here to listen to the music, or are you here just to sulk at the bar and look into your beer like it killed your children?"

And well, Bobbi must have been too busy with her self deprecation time to realize someone sat next to her at the bar and was now looking at her. Not just someone, either, but a girl. A pretty girl.

"I don't have children," she says before she can stop herself, and maybe this is why she's still single even tho it's 2020 and lesbian bars and dating apps are a thing that exist.

"That's good to know," the girl says, and gifts Bobbi a bright smile dressed in red lipstick. "Hi, I'm Reggie Molina"

"Bobbi Wilson," Bobbi says, and fucking extends her right arm for a handshake like a dumbass.

"Nice to meet you, Bobbi," the girl, Reggie, chuckles shaking her hand. "So? Are you here to see a particular band or did you just came here to be sad? 'Cause I gotta say, if it's the second one you chose a terrible place for it."

Reggie is giving a pointed look at the crowd to prove her point, and she's right, of course. Some band is playing a Pearl Jam cover and the audience looks sweaty and a little bit gross from dancing all together and jumping to the beat of the music. Bobbi can't quite make it out with the dark red light situation the club has going on but she's sure she sees Alex by the right side of the stage talking to someone.

"Uh, no, not really. I'm in a band and we're missing a bassist for our next gig. We're supposed to be looking for someone to play with us but everyone seems..." She doesn't finish her thought but Reggie shoots her a look like she knows what she means.

"What's your band's name?" Reggie asks, taking a sip of her drink.

And wow, maybe Bobbi should practice her people skills because she didn't even notice Reggie already had a drink or the way she looks so pretty holding the straw between her red lips. She also got pretty hands, from what she can see of them holding the tall glass of her drink. They look soft but not too delicate, and Bobbi is definitely not looking at how long and slender her fingers are, absolutely not, sir.

"Uh, Sunset Curve?" She's not sure why she phrases it like a question but she hopes that it's just distracting enough so Reggie doesn't realize she went quiet because she was looking at her hands.

"Oh, shit, are you serious? I fucking love your music," Reggie says with another one of her open smiles. And Bobbi isn't looking, but she can see how pretty Reggie looks when she smiles like that. She has one of those smiles that make her do everything she can to keep seeing it. "I saw you guys play this club over at Sunset Boulevard last month, I think, you guys killed it. My sister definitely has a crush on your frontman, bought your demo and all."

Bobbi kinda hates the sound of her own laugh but she can help but laugh at Reggie's words. Girls having crushes on Luke is such an usual occurrence that they now count on the fact that most of their audience at any given point it's made up of teenage girls and young women who are there to see Luke bounce around the stage with his arms at full display. It's cute, honestly, how Luke gets all flushed when Alex and Bobbi joke about how he ought to take his shirt off on stage to see if that helps selling more tickets to their shows only for him to go on a rant about how 'it's about the music, you dorks'.

"She'll be happy to know he's single, then," Bobbi says between laughs.

"Oh, is he now?"

If Bobbi's heart skips a beat or two at the edge of interest in Reggie's voice she hopes it doesn't show on her face. Of course Reggie is interested in Luke, why wouldn't she.

"Is your drummer, too? Single, I mean."

"Uh, yeah, Alex's single," Bobbi says, her disappointment bleeding through her voice just a little bit. "He's gay, thought. Alex, I mean."

"What about the rhythm guitarist?" Reggie asks again, her smile a little darker and just on the edge of flirtatious, and Bobbi is sure she's imagining the way her eyes seem to give her a once over. "Is she single?"

Bobbi takes a long second to reply, suddenly hyper aware of the way Reggie's blue—so, so fucking blue—eyes are looking directly at her, how her left hand is so close to where Bobbi's is, right next to her beer that's most likely gone warm by now. She's suddenly aware of how close they are, how Reggie must have been closing their distance while they've been talking because now she can feel her breath just inches away from her lips, can even taste the fruity taste of whatever cocktail she's drinking.

"Yeah, I'm single," Bobbi says. It's barely more than a whisper, but Reggie hears it all the same if the way she gives her another one of those lopsided smiles and moves even closer to Bobbi are any indication.

They're so, so close now that Bobbi would have to barely move at all to kiss her. Actually, their lips are so close that they might as well be kissing right now because Bobbi can feel the way they move against hers when she speaks again.

"And what's you guys' policy of dating other band members?"  

"Uh, well, Luke and Alex dated for a while a couple years ago before they decided they liked each other as friends better," she replies. She's pretty sure she must look stupid right now, all cross eyed with how close they are and how she keeps trying to look at Reggie's mouth and eyes at the same time. "Why?"

"Well, you said you guys are looking for a bassist and I would like to audition for the position, but there's this really hot guitarist on the band, too, and I don't think I could play with her if I don't get to kiss her, too."

And Bobbi's brain is so haywire by now that one thing she says to this is, "I haven't even heard you play."

Reggie's face moves back just a couple inches as she laughs at Bobbi's words but she's frowning at the distance anyway, so used to feeling Reggie's lips just barely against hers as they speak.

"Then I'll guess you'll have to stick around and watch," Reggie says with a wink and kisses Bobbi.

It's hardly a kiss, to be honest, just a little more than a touch of lips and it's over so fast Bobbi can't even react to it and kiss her back. It nonetheless stuns Bobbi enough that she stands sat at her bar stool even as Reggie gives her another wink and starts walking towards the stage where another band is starting to set up for their own set, too dumbfounded to go after her and still trying to figure out what the fuck just happened.

[unfortunate-stranger-losers]

Triple the Losers AU - Concept Notes

i wanted there to be 27 but if i added patties and audras that made 27 but then i’d have to add kay bc i love her which would make 28 so 21 it is

so the basic concept for this is “hey guys remember how i doubled the baudelaires and made the best au with movie! and netflix!bauds well we’re doing that with book, miniseries and film losers club” 

So, yeah, in this au, the book, miniseries and film Losers are all in the same universe, related, and ready to kill a clown. There is no Chapter Two because these kids bully that clown to death asap. 

A friend group of 21 is pretty wild but definitely makes for a pretty great army. 

Full list of Losers:

The Denbrough Boys

Isaac Denbrough - film!Bill

13

An adopted sibling, though he’s never known any family but the Denbroughs and is never considered anything other than the oldest Denbrough boy 

Artist who wants to illustrate for his brothers’ books bc he loves them

Gay but in denial. Giant crush on Daniel Hanlon. 

Anselm Denbrough - miniseries!Bill 

12 

Likes to write fantasy novels as an escape from reality 

Fights with Bill about whether fantasy or horror is better which is lowkey a metaphor for them arguing about how to deal with their trauma

William “Bill” Denbrough - book!Bill

11

Writes horror stories cause he loves psychological analyzation 

He prefers to face his fears rather than “escape” from them, causing tension between he and Anselm with how they deal with Georgie’s death

Georgie Denbrough - there is only one Georgie as he literally only exists for like one chapter

6 

Loves his brothers 

Dead as fuck, sorry 

Stuttering seems to be a family trait during childhood in the Denbrough family that Anselm and Bill are afflicted with, though Bill much more than his older bother. (Isaac also starts stuttering young, which is suspected to be more psychological.) This trait skipped a generation, and thus the Denbrough parents don’t really know enough about how to deal with their sons’ disability.

They’re a very creative family, usually in terms of creative writing, though they’re also pretty skilled in the art department. Sharon Denbrough is a skilled pianist and taught Isaac until recently. The family was never very close, and Bill always had a rocky relationship with his parents, but the family fell apart after the death of Georgie. Isaac and Bill found themselves practically ignored, while Anselm was pretty much yelled at for trying to fix everything. The brothers only managed to maintain their relationship by trying to avenge Georgie by killing this fucking clown.

The Hanscom Boys

Desmond “Des” Hanscom - film!Ben

13 

Would like to go into Investigative Journalism, though he’s also really into Local Histories

Tends to be afraid of the concept of death more than anything else 

Has a lot of social anxiety 

Auster Hanscom - miniseries!Ben

12

Super into all forms of writing but mostly poetry, which he loves and kinda obsesses over 

Was most affected by not having a father figure around, as Des and Ben didn’t seem to mind 

Assumed he was straight for a while but is probably demi 

Benjamin “Ben” Hanscom - book!Ben

11 

The Architect, and his love of blueprints and planning has made him the main strategist of the Losers Club 

He really doesn’t have many psychological demons so his worst fear is just the mummy he saw in a movie too late at night

Pure baby 

The Hanscoms’ father left the family when Arlene was still pregnant with Ben; while the boys never understood why, they sometimes speculate about secret missions, one or both of their parents cheating, government conspiracies, etc. Des and Ben never really minded, as Des was quite the introvert and Ben was close with their mom, but Auster really wished they could have a paternal figure, especially since the boys tend to be shunned for their genetic overweight appearance and he really wished for some kind of acceptance. 

The move to Derry was recent, as Arlene managed to find a higher-paying job that could help her support her boys. Ben managed to get himself in trouble with the Bowers Gang, meaning that his brothers, defensive of him, also became targets. But they manage to find friends in the Losers Club, and with the whole gang together, nobody’s going to be able to hurt them... right? 

The Marsh Girls

Karen “Karrie” Marsh - film!Bev

13 

Hates her name, thinks it sounds like a middle-aged mom. Goes by Karrie which she thinks sounds cooler (and serves as another Stephen King reference)

Wants to do movie stunts as an adult, is the most daring and bold of the Losers Club, and also probably the physically strongest 

Intensely protective of her sisters, especially due to their home situation 

Brooke Marsh - miniseries!Bev

12 

The sweetest little angel you will ever meet. Has never done anything wrong in her life 

Wants to be a painter and is very artistic. Karrie has shoplifted her paint supplies before 

The only one of her sisters to not smoke, as they refuse to let her near cigarettes 

Beverly “Bev” Marsh - book!Bev

11 

Technically the half-sister (stepsister?) of her older sisters, and can tell that her Mom doesn’t seem to care for her sisters much. She loves them, though, and won’t stand for people insulting them 

Quite the fashion designer, and even though the family is poor, she’s been making sure they don’t look like shit since she could choose her own clothes 

Probably the most manipulative of the Losers, though this has its advantages, such as when they need to get out of trouble. 

Giant Lesbian, definitely marries Kay McCall 

Karrie and Brooke have lived under the hate of their father for a while, due to the fact that he blames them for their mother’s death; Karrie brought home a virus from daycare that infected their mother, weakening her enough that labor with Brooke killed her. Karrie tends to get the most shit for this, mainly because Brooke gets along more with their stepmother, Elfrida. Elfrida married their father only a few months following their mother’s death, mainly due to the fact that Al got her pregnant. The family is quite poor, and the parents work quite a lot, meaning the sisters have gotten pretty good at fending for themselves. 

Recently, the girls have started to get more fears about their father than just physical abuse- he’s been acting weird around Karrie and Bev, and while Brooke seems to avoid his eye for the time being, she has been quite hurt by his violent outbursts. Karrie’s secretly been saving up to take her sisters away before he can do anything to them, though she’s not sure how to tell Brooke and Bev, as they don’t even understand what they’re supposed to be afraid of. But while they’re in Derry, they end up finding themselves among the Losers Club, on a mission to save the children of the town by killing a monster that lives in the sewers. That won’t be much of a problem; they have much worse monsters at home. 

The Kaspbrak Boys

Chase Kaspbrak - film!Eddie

13 

Somehow simultaneously the most paranoid and most reckless boy in the world 

He’s really into analysis and predicting events 

Can and Will fight you, but he will be bitching about it the entire time 

Otto Kaspbrak - miniserires!Eddie

11, Eddie’s older twin 

Incredibly stubborn and snarky, but also the most loyal Loser and the most sincere 

Has an interest in mechanics and repair, and when his mom’s not looking he’ll take things apart to find out how they work 

Edward “Eddie” Kaspbrak - book!Eddie

11, Otto’s younger twin

Very adaptable and adventurous, though he has a lot of anxiety at times 

Special Interest in cars, wants to be a driver as an adult

Able to find direction no matter where they are, and his gift of coordination has helped the Losers numerous times 

There will absolutely be a car chase scene where he has to drive 

Chase is the only Kaspbrak who really remembers their father, being seven when he died instead of his brothers’ five. He seems to recall them not being so sick back then, though his Mother claims otherwise, and their father being a good, playful man. But he’s not here now, and their mother, Sonia, is paranoid about everything. Her boys are very weak and sick and can’t do much, and she hates that they have such rough, rude friends that must be corrupting them somehow. 

The boys, however, are much more adventurous and capable than Sonia believes- especially Chase, who has actually won more than one fight, mostly on behalf of his brothers. As the eldest, Chase believes he has to protect Otto and Eddie, whether it be from a bunch of school bullies, a killer clown in the sewers, or their own mother. Also, Chase and Eddie are gay as hell and Otto is demi-gay as fuck. 

The Hanlon Boys

Daniel “Danny” Hanlon - film!Mike

14, the oldest of the Losers

He’s actually the cousin of Orel and Mike; he recently moved in with his aunt and uncle after the death of his parents in a house fire. He’s pretty traumatized from the incident 

Wants more than anything to travel and explore the world, meet new people and see everything there is to see, and being stuck in boring, bigoted Derry is pretty much hell for him 

He is very protective of his cousins and friends, though, and is the one who believes the most in their ability to triumph over Pennywise

Orel Hanlon - miniseries!Mike

12

Incredibly excitable and very optimistic, as well as incredibly bookish. As such, he tends to infodump whether people want to hear him or not 

Super into cartography, and collects old, antique maps as well as making his own pretty much wherever they go 

Really into gruesome horror stuff and doesn’t understand why it scares and/or grosses out other people. 

Michael “Mike” Hanlon - book!Mike

11 

Incredibly watchful and steadfast, and the Loser with perhaps the most emotional stability 

He’s a lil Historian whose greatest desire is to work for the library and get to read as many books as he wants 

Just. really fucking loves his dog 

Orel and Mike don’t go into town much, mainly staying on their farm with their loving parents and spending their time with the farm animals; Mike is closest to their watchdog, but Orel loves being among the sheep. In the last few months, their cousin Danny moved in with them, and their relationship is... a bit awkward. Orel is too blunt and Mike is too curious, and they don’t know how to carefully approach the subject of his parents burning to death in front of him without making him feel worse. 

It doesn’t help that Danny hates Derry; it’s bigoted, it’s tiny, it’s in the middle of nowhere, and people are dying left and right. However, once his cousins convince him to come hang out with their friends, he ends up bonding with the other Losers of the town, even though they’re all a bunch of weird white kids. And though the Hanlons don’t deal much with town business, they’re ready to join in the fight to stop Pennywise from killing anyone else. 

The Tozier Triplets

Reynard “Reynie” Tozier - film!Richie

12, the firstborn of the triplets 

Loudmouthed, rude, impulsive and very crass, mainly to hide his crippling self-doubt and fears of being ostracized  

Super good at video games and says he wants to be a professional gamer, though honestly he’s just really interested in stand-up comedy 

Gay as all fuck

Roderick “Rod” Tozier - minseries!Richie

12, the middle of the triplets

While he’s just as hyperactive as his triplets, he’s a bit more controlled and actually the least raunchy, meaning Reynie and Richie joke that he’s not using his name correctly 

Wants to be a voice actor for cartoons like Looney Tunes, and is actually getting decent at impersonating the RoadRunner. 

Richard “Richie” Tozier - book!Richie

12, the youngest of the triplets 

Pretty wild and uncontrollable, energized as all hell, and makes off-color jokes to piss people off and get attention, though he does have a true heart for his friends 

Wants to have his own radio show in the future. Was the first to befriend the Marsh girls, because he and Bev would share cigarettes during recess 

Bi as all fuck 

The Tozier triplets are a trio of ADHD disasters and nobody in Derry can or will ever forget it. Reynie and Rod tend to “big brother” Richie, meaning they tend to end up slapping him upside the head for saying something insensitive, though sometimes Reynie says something a bit too impulsively as well. They used to do different voices to entertain each other, meaning it’s a bit of an interest for all of them. While Reynie tends to lean more towards comedy, though, Rod wants to be a voice actor for cartoons like Looney Tunes, and Richie hopes to be some kind of radio personality. 

Their parents mean well but are often at work, and even at home they don’t quite understand their boys, so the triplets are pretty used to relying on each other. Reynie kinda has the least parental affection, as Rod and Richie tend to get into even more shit than he does, so he kinda falls to the wayside. His isolation tends to manifest in fears of abandonment and loneliness- and a public outing resulting in such, starting when he started to realize that he maybe didn’t like girls as much as he said he did. Rod and Richie, meanwhile, also have vague fears of outing, though Pennywise represents their bisexuality as werewolfism- always transforming in painful and terrifying ways. 

The Uris Boys

Mason Uris - film!Stan

13 

Very cautious, but definitely not the Mom friend; he will inform you how shitty your idea is, but will not stop you, and in fact will grab popcorn to watch 

Loves studying art history and different art forms, though he doesn’t want to create them himself, just catalogue them. He likes to entertain Isaac and Brooke by “critiquing” their “fabulous” artwork

The only one of his siblings who doesn’t get along with their parents 

Peter Uris - miniseries!Stan

12, almost 13 

Incredibly logical and has the most anxiety. Is the last one to believe in the clown just because it doesn’t fit into his worldview 

While all the boys love birdwatching, he’s the one who’d like to go into it as a profession; he loves ornithology and wants to study birds for the rest of his life 

Stanley “Stan” Uris - book!Stan

11 

Loves to have things in order, and doesn’t really know how to interact with people socially, because people don’t act in predictable ways. 

Super good at mathematics and hopes to be an engineer or accountant 

Has the weirdest sense of humor, which means he is the best

The Urises are one of the few Jewish families in town, and in a bigoted town like Derry, that means they were pretty much outcasted from the getgo. They are all relatively close with each other, in that they’ll argue nonstop but also would die for each other without question. Peter and Stan probably get along the best, as they’ll sit and talk about birds until they pass out, while Mason likes to sit in his room and read his books on famous artists. Mason also has a bit more of a strained relationship with his parents, while his brothers get along with them much better. 

The boys refused to believe in Pennywise for the longest time, as they’re all very logical and orderly and “magic alien clown eating kids by turning into their fears” doesn’t exactly fit into their normal worldview. But they’re going to stick by their friends and do their best to protect themselves and the town... and, well, if the way to kill the clown is by bullying him to death, they have a shitton of insults they’ve been saving for a special occasion. 

[junietuesday]

During the summer before their freshman year, Michael and Jeremy go camping.

The two of them have been extremely hyped over the weeks leading up to it, because although this is a yearly tradition, this year, Michael’s and Jeremy’s parents decided that since they’re going into high school, they’re old enough to go with only Michael’s older sister as a chaperone. Said older sister has plans with friends nearby, so she agreed to leave them to their own devices as long as they stick to the campgrounds and didn’t blow anything up. Which means Michael and Jeremy had a whole week to themselves.

“Don’t murder anyone, I’ll be back in two days but I’m only a half hour’s drive away,” says Michael’s sister, as Michael and Jeremy climb out of her beat-up 2007 Toyota Corolla. “Do you need help with your bags?”

“Nope,” says Michael, popping the “p” as he circles around to the car’s trunk. “Wait, before you go, take a picture of us here, in case Mom makes sure you’re with us.”

Soon, Michael and Jeremy are starting down the winding path through the forest, which leads to the campgrounds. Michael’s practically bouncing along, looking over at Jeremy with a wide smile.

“This is gonna be so fun,” Michael says brightly, nudging Jeremy with his shoulder, and Jeremy stumbles with a snort. “Like, we can have as many snacks and s’mores as we want and go climbing those huge rocks our parents never let us touch and it’s gonna be so great.”

Jeremy grins, laughing a little, and Michael suddenly notices that his eyes are kinda pretty.

Michael turns and stares back down at the dirt path, smile falling off his face as he frowns, confused.

~

By the time Michael and Jeremy emerge from the forest path into the open campground, Michael has mostly managed to shove that strange blip from his mind as they enter their cabin, the exact same one their parents rent every year. There are two rooms, and usually each family takes one of them, but this time, since Michael and Jeremy are alone, they can share, instead of staying up late in the main area and passing out on the pull-out couch.

Jeremy dumps his backpack and the plastic bag of s’more ingredients on the floor next to the bed closest to the window, flopping onto the mattress and spreading his arms.

“I’m kinda tired from the drive,” he says, as Michael puts his own bag down more gently and moves to sit on the edge of Jeremy’s bed, “but what d’you wanna do tonight?”

Michael’s answer is immediate. “Campfire food!” he exclaims, dropping down next to Jeremy. “I want marshmallows!”

For a few minutes, they’re quiet, just relaxing next to each other. The bed isn’t exactly the most luxurious, but being here next to Jeremy just makes Michael feel…warm. And comfortable.

But soon Michael’s perpetual restlessness wins out, and he sits up and gets out of the bed, tugging Jeremy to his feet. “I know you’re tired but we were literally sitting there for hours so you’ll be fine, I don’t wanna just sit here, let’s go play Uno or something outside.”

“Fine, fine!” Jeremy says, stumbling along as Michael pulls him out the bedroom’s door. “You need to get the cards, y’know.”

“Oh.” Michael stops, and laughs, turning back around to grab the pack from his bag. But as he kneels down to dig through his backpack, his hand sort of feels tingly, and oh, it hits him.

He was holding Jeremy’s hand. Holding Jeremy’s hand makes him feel kinda buzzy.

Michael swallows, shoving that down to deal with later. He finds the pack of Uno cards, along with a standard pack of cards for good measure, and holds the two up, trying for a triumphant grin.

~

“Fuck you, fuck you fuck you!” Jeremy screeches, as Michael puts down a +4 card with a wide smirk.

“Uno!” Michael says as soon as the card drops into the pile, giggling at Jeremy’s groan of misery as he face-plants into the picnic table. “Suck on that!”

They’re in the common area of the camp, playing their games of Uno at a table right next to the lake they’ve managed to snag. It’s not terribly crowded, especially since it’s only the second week of summer and there aren’t a huge amount of cabins available here, so the only people around right now are this family eating ice cream at a table across the field, a person walking around staring at their phone who’s almost definitely playing Pokémon Go, and a man in a gray hoodie leaning against the railing of a deck into the water, which has one of those binocular things you need to stick a quarter in to use.

“You‘re an ass, I hate you,” Jeremy grumbles into the table, and Michael reaches over and ruffles his hair, earning a yelp. “Michael. Don’t touch my hair.”

“Oh, right, you only fantasize about having people whose names rhyme with Bristine Tanigula run their fingers through it,” says Michael, laughing, and Jeremy looks up and glares over his arms.

“What is this, ‘Attack Jeremy Relentlessly Hour’ or something?” Jeremy says. “She’ll never like me anyway.”

Michael frowns. “Don’t say that,” he says, more seriously. “You’re awesome. You just need to, uh, well. Actually talk to her.”

“Like that’ll ever happen,” Jeremy says, dropping his head to the table once again, and though it’s stupid, especially because he brought it up in the first place, Michael’s a little disconcerted at this turn of conversation. There’s only so many different things about his crushes Jeremy can agonize over, and it’s a little exhausting to hear them over and over again, especially in the middle of what was supposed to be their week. But Michael will bear it; he’s not Jeremy’s best friend for nothing, he supposes.

“Besides,” Jeremy continues, voice muffled into his arms, “there’s nothing ‘awesome’ about me. You just say so ‘cause you’re my best friend and you have to.”

“That’s not true,” Michael says. “You appreciate video games. Your laugh and eyes and hair and face are cute—um, I mean a bunch of girls probably think so. You’re funny. You’re smart.”

“Thanks,” Jeremy says, looking up, and Michael can see a genuine smile on his face from the compliments.

Butterflies go through Michael’s stomach.

~

About a trillion more games of Uno later, plus another few million rounds of other card games, the sun has set enough for it to be an appropriate time to make a campfire. It’s evening during early summer, so Michael and Jeremy have to change into long-sleeved shirts, but the weather is still the perfect kind of light and breezy as they pick their way through the woods, searching for sticks for firewood, the perfect roasting sticks, and, just for fun, some big sticks that are good for swords/staffs. The path is thin, unlike the road leading to the campground, and there are fallen trees and their jagged stumps all over that are hard to see in the dim light of the rising moon, but the walk is still relaxing.

The darkness cloaking the late hour and the comfortable chatter of nature and the giddiness from this being their first day allows Michael to say things closer to his heart.

“I’m really happy,” he says during a lull in the conversation, smiling softly to himself as he reaches down to grab more sticks and tuck them under his arm. “This is fun and you’re my favorite.”

“Aw, that’s kinda gay,” Jeremy jokes, but he continues sincerely, “You’re my favorite too.”

For some reason, the words make something in Michael’s chest feel weird.

Michael’s known he’s gay for about a year and a half, now, and that’s only counting when he was finally able to admit it to himself, but he and Jeremy have known about being gay for far longer, thanks to middle school. It’s an all too common occurrence for Michael’s mood to sink slightly when Jeremy calls things gay as a synonym for either “too affectionate” or “stupid”—but he knows what that feels like, and this isn’t that.

“You’re kinda gay,” Michael says, instead of any of that. Jeremy shoves him into the nearest tree, going red.

“Shut up, I bet you’re gay,” Jeremy retaliates, and for a moment, Michael contemplates telling him.

But it goes nowhere, as always. Anyway, this would be an awful time, because they’re stuck together in the middle of a camp two hours away from home, with nowhere for Jeremy to go if he decides that Michael is too gross to hang out with. And, a little selfishly, Michael just wants to enjoy this week alone with his best friend without souring the mood with a huge revelation like this, without potentially ruining everything at the cost of being true to himself.

“Yeah, okay,” Michael scoffs, swallowing the urge to come out and the fear welling up at just the thought of doing so. He continues walking, and Jeremy follows, walking backward and bouncing on the balls of his feet. “Remind me which of us has the huge crush on Keanu Reeves?”

“You’re a jerk, it’s a respectful admiration,” Jeremy insists, and then swears when he trips over a tree’s stray root. Righting himself, he continues, tone miffed but, as far as Michael can tell, with honesty, “If you were gay I wouldn’t make fun of you like this.”

Michael laughs, heart softening with affection and exploding at the same time with a rush of hope. And then he pushes the warmth away, but at least this time, it’s a bit more gently than before.

~

Fifteen minutes later, Michael and Jeremy are back in front of their cabin, stacking sticks by the firepit and setting up the tinder.

Or, well, Jeremy’s doing that. Michael’s sitting in front of a slab of wood, twisting a stick back and forth in his palms with determination.

“Michael, you know that’s not gonna work,” Jeremy says, the disbeliever and coward. “I’m just gonna get the matches.”

“You’re just a disbeliever and a coward,” Michael says without looking up, rolling the stick even more firmly. “Go get your disbeliever coward matches, see if I care.”

Jeremy snorts, and Michael hears him retreat into the cabin. Michael’s hands still, as he stares down at the piece of wood his stick’s end is poked into.

Does he like Jeremy?

Well, if today was any indication, yes, probably. But how can he just suddenly have a crush on Jeremy after ten years of purely platonic friendship? This can’t have appeared today. But how did Michael not notice?

Is this even a crush? He’s never had a proper one before, he hasn’t known anyone well enough to—even though the books and movies have people falling in love at first sight, that can’t be real. How would you get a crush on someone you’ve barely even met? But Jeremy’s definitely someone Michael‘s met. For all Michael knows, this could be romance.

What if it is romance? Jeremy would never like him back, would never even consider dating him—mostly because Jeremy’s straight as an ruler, almost painfully so, but also because he’d probably be too freaked out by the fact his best friend who he’s been hugging and sleeping next to has been gay all along, and even has a crush on him. Even putting aside that line of thought that makes Michael want to hide, Michael doesn’t think he’s ready to date anyone yet, despite the fact that he’s already fourteen and his classmates have already long begun to go out with each other. So there’s no point to this stupid crush and it should hopefully go away soon.

Yeah. It should go away soon.

“Okay, here we go,” says Jeremy from behind him, startling Michael out of his thoughts, and Michael turns to see Jeremy kneeling in front of the firepit, striking a match against the side of the matchbox. He gets the match’s tip lit, but then his expression flashes to realization. “Michael, can you go get the—the rainbow fire stuff? It’s in the left pocket of my bag. And the s’more ingredients!”

Michael takes a deep breath, then mock-salutes. “Got it,” he says, pulling himself to his feet. He crosses the grass and pushes open the cabin door, closing it behind him and pressing his forehead to the wood, trying to breathe.

Four in, seven hold, eight out.

He does that four times, then he finally goes and grabs the packet of chemicals from Jeremy’s backpack pocket—it was actually in the right pocket, but Michael knew to check there first anyway—along with the bag with the packs of marshmallows, chocolate, and graham crackers. He’s regained most of the skip in his step when he returns to Jeremy, who’s built up the campfire to a surprisingly great size.

Jeremy’s face, flickering in the light of the campfire’s flames and the glowing moon above, lights up when he sees Michael.

“Yes!” Jeremy says, jumping up, and he runs over to grab the folding chairs leaning up against the side of their cabin and set them up next to each other by the fire as Michael pulls over a little metal table to put the snacks on. The fire warms his body as he tears open the packs of food, Jeremy passing him his roasting stick, already sharpened and peeled and ready to go.

“You know the drill,” Michael says as he spears a marshmallow onto his stick, “give me your burnt ones immediately or I’ll steal them myself.”

“You’re such a weirdo, why do you like the burnt ones?” Jeremy says as always, but doesn’t protest. “They’re horrible and fried and gross.”

“Says you,” Michael says, sticking his marshmallow straight into the fire, pulling it back out to let it burn for a few seconds, then extinguishing it at the perfect time. Burning marshmallows is a subtle art that Jeremy will never understand. “You just want to be all fancy and stuck up about your marshmallows.”

“No, I’m a reasonable human being that doesn’t like things that are burnt to a crisp,” says Jeremy, gently rotating his own marshmallow at a safe distance from the flames. “You just have no functioning tastebuds.”

Michael glances over, and his heart does a little flip in his chest at the sight of Jeremy’s grin, as he stares intently to get his marshmallow “perfectly” browned.

…Just for a bit. Michael can indulge in this just for a bit.

~FIN

Word Count: 2425

Team: Michael

Prompts: all main prompts, the crescent moon, the forest path, the gray car

@bmc-gift-exchange

[blogging-not-my-forte]

OK, So Here’s a  Headcannon for all you Nerds who don’t Ship Nemma but DO Think Emma and Noah are Bro’s. (I.E. Me.)

TL;DR: Noah and Emma were using a Strat.

(This is probably too long but it was important to me to share.)

So, walk with me. 

Noah and Owen go on RR to compete, and Owen wants to have fun, but Noah Wants To Win. 

So this boy starts Strategizing, before the show he’s reviewing all of the programs he’s already been on and picking out what went wrong. It was usually because he’s Lazy or Unlikable, so he makes a note of it to try harder and be Nicer, because he  Really Wants That Money. 

But as he’s making his notes, he notices something… People who have romantic interests make it farther in the games. So now it’s plan time.

So Noah is studying which couples make it the farthest, and the dynamic’s they have and he comes up with a plan. This boy is going to pretend he’s crushing hard on someone, get them alone, explain the plan, and hope to god that it works. The only Hiccup is that Straight couples seem to make it farther (probably ‘cause they’re easier to market) so Noah has to not be Gay for the whole show, which he’ll do because  MONEY. (Though he is a sneaky boy, and brings up the concept of boyfriends multiple times, and grabs two Groom Wedding rings, because he is being ran on Spite.)

So Noah doesn’t let Owen in on it, because he’s bad at secrets and this is important. 

Now Noah is scouting out the perfect Girl, who will be A.) Smart Enough to do it, and B.) No risk of actually wanting to date him, which is when he over hears the sisters talking about how Emma doesn’t wanna do a relationship right now and he’s like “Perfect”. 

So Noah put’s his plan into motion, and starts acting love struck, and people are actually buying it and he’s pumped! 

When they’re on the plane and Owen farts and Emma and Noah both get up and walk away is when he goes to tell her, but first Emma is like, “Listen, dude I’m not interested, so stop whatever you’re doing” And Noah is like “Yeah, no, I’m Gay, but listen…”  So Emma is like “I do want to win….. OK. But I have been firmly Anti-Alliance and also Ant-Relationship so I have to make it look Natural.” And Noah’s like “Perfect” And so they agree on the strat, and Emma starts watching old Reality shows with couples who win on them and things are great.

So mini Headcannon in the Big Headcannon: Noah has Stage Fright, pretty bad. 

So in “ I Love Ridonc and Roll”, it isn’t Emma that makes Noah Nervous , it’s when he opens his eye’s and sees people watching him. He decides to try and play it up as a crush on Emma for strat reasons, but the boy is shook. At first Emma is like “Whatever, guess the Strat’s Done.” But then she’s like “Uh-Oh, we Bonded and Now we’re Friends Uh-Oh. This is why I didn’t want to do an Alliance”. So now Emma has to figure something out without being obvious that she cares but also pretending she has a crush  but also acting like she doesn’t, and Kitty see’s that Emma’s nervous and is like “Oh my gosh, just tell him you think Air Guitar is cute or something” And Emma’s like, Oh no, that won’t actually help because the crush is fake but there are camera’s so I can’t say that. What do I do!!! So Emma, is just like “Mickey can’t do it so it’s chill” But then Mickey CAN So now she has to Sabotage My Sons The Twins, because she doesn’t want to lose her friend!!!! 

Then Owen (Who is still not in on it but has come to the conclusion his little Buddy is Bi like Him, which is AWESOME!) Gives the pep-talk and when Noah says “Uh, Gee Big Guy, I…. I don’t know what to Say…” he’s ABOUT to let Owen in on the secret because Owen IS his best Buddy and he doesn’t want him to think that they’re gonna lose because of a crush, and he’s gonna come clean, but then Owen is all “You need to stop worrying about being some girls hero, and be my Hero!” And now Noah is like “Wow, I’m Gay.” and he goes out, and Emma does an encouraging wave and He Does The Thing!!! (But he still has to do it with his eyes close, because his Stage Fright is still a thing) ((Also he’s super embarrassed that he and Jay share a Phobia))

So Emma and Noah Sneak off for plans and Emma’s Like “We Still on for the Strat?” and Noah’s like “I Am Very Gay, and This Is Going To Be Harder Than I Originally Thought.” And Emma’s Like “I got this, Just Follow my Lead…. Also Next Challenge we can take a break, and you can Just Hang with Owen.” And Noah’s like “Thanks”

And the plan goes on as Normal, and Emma and Noah legitimately enjoy their conversations, even though they have to keep throwing in crush stuff, and things are good.

 Emma figures out that a lot of these couples at this point establish that they wanna smooch, and she tells Noah and they’re both like “Gross”, but then they’re both like “Money” So they start peppering that in. She also put’s together that in most cases, only one member of the couple makes it, and if they part on both 1.) Good terms, and 2.) A Successful Smooch, Likely hood of the remaining person winning is slim to none.  So Emma’s like, “You know what, We’re Friends and I’m mad about it, but I know how much winning means to you, so I’ll make sure I’m the one who goes home first :)” And Noah’s like “Cool.”

But then he over hears Kitty and Owen, and Kitty’s like “We’re doing this so we have enough money for Emma to go to Law School :)” And Noah’s like “Oh No, Feelings.” 

 Emma also Notices that a running theme is “Trouble in Paradise”, So they come up with a “Kinda Break-Up” , where Noah decides to try and throw the Race by “Breaking”, but it doesn’t work, and Emma catches on and is like “DUDE! Don’t you want to Win???” and he’s like “You’re Going to Law School.” And Emma’s Like “Oh, so you think I’m letting You be the bigger person????” And They Argue as Quietly as Possible, before Emma is Like, “Whatever, We’ll Just play it by ear…” 

But Noah is Stubborn and Doesn’t Listen. So In “Got Venom”, Everything is going as  Originally planned until Noah Gets Trapped under the Rugs, and at first he’s like “I can do Effort. I can do Effort for Money.” But then he remembers Emma actually Needs  the Money, and that he can just do another Reality Show and Oh No He Has A Friend and He Hates It. So That’s when Noah decides to throw the Race in hopes of helping his new friend 

But then they mess up, because Emma, who is still trying to play up the crush and is Legitimately freaking out that her new friend is crushed Makes the “I’d Totally Kiss you” Comment, which Noah’s like “Perfect Moment to Make my entrance. This is gonna look great for the camera. Best plan.”  And is like “I’m Here!” and now they have to improvise, which they’ve been doing, but Emma’s really stressed out, And Noah was Kind of Covered in Rugs, so he’s like “What do people with crushes say”  So he’s like “What about that  I’d Totally Kiss You Thing?” And Emma, who is still Frazzled is like “Oh no, What do people with Crushes do.” And that’s when in a moment of panic Emma Kisses Noah. And that’s why, unlike someone who actually wanted a kiss, Noah is wide-eyed and Stiff cause “Oh No The Plan”  and it fades out before we see Emma who is also like “Oh No The Plan.”  

And the Sisters don’t win, But the Reality TV Pros made some new Friends, who, if they ever actually win a game, will help one of them with her college debt.

[latter-day-saint-nick]

I should probably ignore this, but I’m feeling petty today.

I’ll address your second point first. The reason I singled out Moffat is because I’ve been annoyed with his work since Doctor Who, a show that I loved before he took over and the writing went downhill. My tag “flipping Moffat” is an in-joke between my wife and me. We started saying it in response to Moffat’s bad writing and dangling plot-threads on Doctor Who, but then went on to use that phrase jokingly whenever a piece of fiction has bad continuity and makes no sense, even when Moffat isn’t involved. Many of his worst qualities as a writer are on full display in Dracula: bad continuity, queerbaiting, dialogue that tries too hard to sound clever, clear contempt for the source material, poor attempts at female empowerment that just come off as sexist, male protagonists who are so much better and more important than everyone else. Since Moffat worked with Gatiss on both this and Sherlock, it’s safe to assume that Gatiss is just as bad of a writer as he is, but I can’t muster up the same hate towards him, simply because I know less about him. I don’t know what Gatiss’s personal views are like, but I have read plenty of interviews with Moffat where he says incredibly sexist and just generally gross things. So, yeah, screw Moffat and his relentless misogyny!

As to your first point, look, you’re allowed to disagree with my views, but saying that I shouldn’t be allowed to engage in media criticism is just rude. Especially when you don’t even bring up any counterarguments as to why I’m wrong apart from that the lead actor was hot. And you are absolutely allowed to enjoy trashy television because it has attractive people in it. Just like I’m allowed not to enjoy it.

Not to brag, but... okay, yeah, I’m totally saying this to brag, but I literally have a PhD in literature. Media criticism is kind of my thing. No, my rant was not on the level of an academic essay, but it wasn’t meant to be. My aim was mainly to be entertaining, which is why I used a joking tone throughout, even inserting some of the funny comments my wife and I made while watching the show.

But the fact that I have a PhD doesn’t even matter, because you didn’t just say that my critique was invalid, but that every person on Tumblr’s critique is. Why is that? Is it because there’s a lot of teenagers on this website? Teenagers may not have as much nuance in their media criticism than someone with more experience and education, but we all have to start somewhere, and just because someone’s young doesn’t mean they have nothing worthwhile to say. As far as I know, there’s no sign in front of fandom that says, “You must be this old for your opinion to matter.”

Have I seen bad media criticism on Tumblr? Sure. But I’ve also seen a lot of good, thoughtful discussions. I follow a lot of blogs that examine issues like sexism, racism and homophobia in media. Invariably, they get a bunch of hateful comments from people who think they’re over-analyzing or that they’re hurting the fandom by discussing racism. And this is kind of the vibe I’m getting from your comments, which is why they rankle me so much. Like I should just shut up about the problematic writing and let you enjoy your sexy vampires. (I apologize if I’m misunderstanding your intent here.)

Because while I mostly made fun of the bad continuity and the nonsensical plot, I did also touch on aspects I found troubling. Like queerbaiting. Literally one of the first lines of the show is, “Did you have sexual intercourse with Dracula?” Sister Agatha later explains that any contact with Dracula - including sexual - could have caused Jonathan’s condition, so there was no reason for her to phrase the question in such an asinine manner other than to tease LGBT+ audiences. And, no, the fact that Lucy has a stereotypical gay best friend in episode 3 does not make it okay. I talked about how Lucy’s characterization felt like a shallow attempt at female empowerment when it really just made her less sympathetic, because it showed her to be self-centred and vain. Which I feel is bad, sexist writing for a character we’re supposed to care about. Even making Van Helsing a woman came off as a shallow attempt at female empowerment when it seemed like the whole reason for the gender-swap was so she and Dracula could be shown in bed together at the end without it being gay. Maybe you disagree that showing Lucy being painfully and horribly burned alive was racist. I mean, in isolation the scene is still disturbing, but maybe not indicative of anything more. But taken together with the treatment of Bill Potts in Doctor Who it does present a troubling trend. Does Moffat (and Gatiss) actively hate black women and want them to suffer? No, probably not. But there is a subconscious bias in society that black women can take more pain than other women, and this shows up in the way they are treated in fiction. This is not a problem unique to Moffat, as the companion who was put through the most crap before Bill Potts was Martha Jones, another black woman. And this was during Davis’s era of Doctor Who.

So, believe or not, I actually put a lot of thought into my silly Dracula post. If you want to have a discussion about points you disagree with, that’s fine. But don’t just go around telling people that they shouldn’t be allowed to express their opinion.

[nommy-thoughts]

Hi, OwO from earlier. I meant, like, in the top part of your blog, 'Feel free to ask questions about any and all of my characters!' And I wanted to hear about any of them.

Okay! In that case, I will take this as an opportunity to ramble about literally all of them. Jason and Dan, Tom and Reggie, Aji and Mitz, Candy, and Mike and his friends.

Jason and Dan

Jason looks human, but he very much is not. He’s some sort of… I don’t know, a criptid of my own invention, I guess. Kinda like a vampire? He can’t eat normal food, only feed off of people’s energy. It doesn’t hurt the person he’s feeding off of in any way, but it is definitely a weird experience, because the only way Jason can absorb said energy is by shrinking people and swallowing them whole.

(technically, it doesn’t have to be human energy. But that’s what works best.)

It only takes a touch for him to shrink someone, and he instinctively knows how to do it. It doesn’t automatically happen when he touches someone, but if he’s hungry and gets startled, it can happen by accident. And once he’s done it, the person becomes only 1/24th of their original height. (For example, someone who’s 5 feet tall normally would become 2.5 inches tall, and someone who’s 6 feet tall normally would become 3 inches tall.)

And of course he can restore people to their normal height again. It takes rather more energy to make someone bigger than to shrink them, though, and he has to have a person in his stomach for at least a while to not have a net loss of energy. 

Now, Jason was abandoned in the forest as a baby, and got by entirely on woodland creatures. Dan happened to wander into Jason’s territory one day, and didn’t have much time to be confused about this grubby naked child before Jason ate him.

Which was terrifying.

But Jason’s stomach is nothing like a regular stomach. The only opening is on the top, for one thing. And it’s covered with soft hairlike things, much like the villi in your intestines, which glow a greenish blue as they siphon energy, so after a few minutes, Dan was able to see his surroundings. And it wasn’t slimy or wet. He eventually fell asleep.

After Jason released Dan, he left, but he kept coming back, and even though Jason kept eating him, he stopped being frightened by the experience.

And then he kinda adopted Jason! So now Jason lives with him, and Dan lets him eat him basically every day. There’s also at least one other person who knows about what Jason is, a coworker of Dan’s who’s about halfway between them in age. He doesn’t mind getting eaten either

—

Tom and Reggie

These two live in a mixed-height society, where humans and minis have equal rights, and while sizeism exists, it’s considered a flavor of racism. Tom is human, and Reggie is a mini, who’s six inches tall. They’re housemates. (also. Tom is nonbinary, and uses they/them pronouns. Reggie’s a guy, he/him.)

Still trying to figure out how their current arrangement got started, considering Reggie is embarrassed to admit he likes it, but the two of them frequently engage in what they call “Games” (yes, with a capital G), which always involve Reggie being inside Tom’s mouth (not all the way, the scale difference isn’t enough for that, but it varies from a finger or two all the way to as much as they can fit at once), and often involve him getting covered with something tasty first. In addition to those, they sometimes do smaller-scale things with maybe a lick or two.

No swallowing, because it wouldn’t be safe in their world, but loads of mouthplay.

They’ve definitely taken the time to sit down together and talk about what they are and aren’t okay with, and they have a safeword in case either gets uncomfortable in the middle of things.  And they make sure to communicate with each other the whole time, when they’re in the middle of it.

Tom’s usually the one to initiate things, and they always check first to make sure that Reggie’s okay with it. Sometimes it’s just something as simple as “May I lick you?” and sometimes it’s laying out the plans for a Game. They usually don’t go into detail, because Reggie likes to be a bit surprised, but Tom might say, “You in the mood for a Game? I had an idea,” and if Reggie was, they might tell him a few of the aspects. (powerplay, foodplay, how much mouthplay it would involve, maybe the kind of food, those such things.) And then they would get into it! Or not, if Reggie didn’t want to do that particular Game after all.

I’m currently working on a story titled ‘Chocolate’, in which there is a fondue pot. And Reggie definitely gets dunked.

He’s also been covered in frosting, been tied up with spaghetti (and accidentally broke several noodles before Tom could bite them off, cooked spaghetti does not make a strong rope), sat in Tom’s ice-cream on a hot summer day, and lounged in more of Tom’s drinks, both hot and cold, than they’ve bothered to count.

Reggie’s sister is aware of their arrangement, which embarrasses Reggie so much, but she doesn’t care what they get up to so long as it’s consensual.

Oh! And I have some art of them! I apparently only have one posted to this blog so far… I’ll have to get on that, cause there are two more. [link]

—

Aji and Mitz

I created Aji for a fanfic of @vore-scientist‘s Mystic Woods stories! (In Which a Giant Wizard Noms a Firewitch) They’re basically a self-insert. Short redheaded li’l nonbinary firewitch. (the firewitch part is not so much a self-insert. That was something Tuitey suggested, to make Aji fit in to that world.)

Mitz is Aji’s giant friend. The two of them have done many noms before, and Aji’s even been swallowed! Only briefly, though, because they don’t want to risk staying in a real stomach for very long. Since Aji is a firewitch, they’re pretty spicy. 

I honestly haven’t developed a lot about these two yet…

Tho!

Aji has a familiar. Her name is Soot, she’s a cat, and she was the one who decided she was gonna be Aji’s familiar, back when she was a kitten. Aji wasn’t even looking for a familiar at the time, but Soot took one look at young Aji and decided, That human is mine. I’m keeping them. So she went right ahead and formed the familiar-witch bond, and next thing Aji knew, this little black ball of fluff was talking to them, and yes it was meows, but it also sounded like words.

Soot’s mom was not so pleased that her kitten had gone and gotten bonded to a witch. Especially a firewitch. Soot’s dad was proud of her, though. (I think he was one of those rough-and-tumble stray cat types, while Soot’s mom was a pampered housecat. Very different backgrounds.) Soot’s mom eventually accepted Aji as her kitten’s witch, though.

Also, Soot is trans. And she thinks that spit is gross and Aji is weird for being okay with being in a mouth.

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Candy

Alright, so ‘Candy’ was originally not going to be her name, but I’m seriously tempted to name her Candace and have her curse to have been inspired by her name.

Cause Candy was cursed! There was this wizard who was trying to woo a woman who was gay and far more interested in Candy, got pissy that she didn’t like him back, decided that Candy had stolen the affection that was “rightly his,” and cursed her. 

So now Candy is only about an inch tall, immortal, and made of candy. The type of candy she’s made of changes sometimes. (still working on the mechanic of how/why.) She prefers some to others, and hates being gum.

She’s changed hands several times over the years, and is currently in the possession of a college student. She spends a lot of time being oral stimulation for late night studies, but at least the student treats her fairly well. They usually ask permission first, and by this point, Candy’s gotten pretty used to being in a mouth, so she lets them do it as long as they don’t bite down. (It doesn’t hurt, but it’s not a pleasant sensation.)

She’s been swallowed more than once, and she doesn’t like that. It’s groossss.

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Mike

This one isn’t technically actual vore, but it’s vorish, so I’m including it.

Mike lives in a mixed height world. Maybe it’s the same as Tom and Reggie’s, as the main scale is 1:12, the same as theirs, but maybe it’s not, because there are also smaller tinies, who mostly live off on their own away from the other two sizes.

Mike is one of the smaller tinies. He’s about two inches tall. And he has a mech! It’s a very good mech, and looks like a human. The entire inside of the head is on stabilizers so that no matter which way the mech is oriented, that room is always right-side up. And in the middle of the skull-room, there’s another room, where Mike goes to control the mech. He has to put on a special motion-sensing suit, and the room is filled with a special material that mimics the outside environment. It’s all very complicated and sciencey, and I don’t know where he got it.

Some of Mike’s friends are humans, and some of them are tinies. Regular tinies, not extra-small ones like Mike.

(A scene:

Tiny Friend: Why do you spend all your time inside that mech?

Mike: I’m not about to be out in the open with a bunch of giants!

Tiny Friend: Why not? I do it every day.

Mike: … I don’t think you understand. You’re one of the giants.

)

Now the vorish part! 

In order to make the mech look realistic, there aren’t seams for it to open. Instead, you gotta climb in through the mouth. Mike’s small enough that he can have the mech lying down and just walk through the throat like a hallway, but a regular tiny has to crawl. Or, if the throat is vertical, there’s a ladder built into the side. (though to get past the part at the back of the mouth is very awkward for a regular tiny, because there’s a wall (again, for realistic looking reasons) in front of the ladder there, and Mike can easily climb through that space, but it’s too small for a regular tiny to fit into)

Sometimes, Mike’s friends get overwhelmed from too much stimulus, and they need somewhere quiet to relax again. If the overwhelmed friend is a tiny, and there isn’t somewhere else available (or sometimes if there is), Mike will let them chill inside his mech with him, either in the torso area (which is a storeroom) or in his room in the head. (They’re allowed to sit on his bed, but because they’re three times his size, they can’t fit to lie down.) Which, of course, looks like he’s swallowing them.

[narutxuzumaki]

ochako and momo for the character ask!! 👀

Yay! Two of my fave characters! Starting with Momo cause it's her bday. Gonna put this all under cut cause it’s long. Thank you nonny for the ask!

Character Ask

Momo Yaoyorozu

Favourite thing about them:

What isn’t to love about this character! Her intelligence and ambition. She’s a normal teenager with insecurities but she still pushes past them to do what’s right. Her quirk is absolutely incredible as well and I just really love how entirely ineffable she is. She doesn’t simply focus on her own development. She offers help and support to her other classmates and when need be criticism cause she knows that the only way up is together. 

least favourite thing about them:

Lol her costume. I tend to pretend it doesn’t exist simply because there are so many better designs on Tumblr

Favourite line:

“We've got to start at the bottom and work up! And if we don't earnestly cheer each other on... we'll never be top heroes!” Listen I adore that she isn’t just out for herself. I adore that she’s focused on creating a wonderful space where they can all push each other and grow whilst also focusing on her own development

BrOTP

Listen I enjoy a TodoMomo friendship as much as the next person but could we consider a KamiMomo. They’re canonically good friends and Kami’s dumbass mixed in with Momo’s who is a genius but also very much a dumbass is genuinely very beautiful to me.

OTP

I really love MomoJirou cause collected punk rock girl catching feelings for a semi-collected rich girl is the chef kiss. Also so many wonderful tropes there but also I’m quite literally stuck in rarepair hell so also momochako. I mean opposites attract is yes! 

NOTP:

I really don’t like romantic TodoMomo. Again there’s nothing wrong with it and rich kid club is everything to me but I typically view these two as lesbian/gay solidarity. 

Random headcanon:

1A, excluding the rich kid club, had to teach her how to budget and do normal people things. Also, like I know this is if not will be disproven by the manga but Momo being related to Nana and thus Shirigaki’s sister is quite literally everything to me. Also cause I’m feeling Momo in this chilli, she’s absolutely gonna break into the top ten ranking. She’s so smart and has an incredible quirk and is a great character. Her building her own agency straight after UA as well. She would and she could! 

Unpopular opinion:

She’s a lot more than her body but also at the same time she’s sixteen and is pushing the boundaries on what she can and can’t get away with in wearing. Hori is gross for designing her like that but also in mind, she always grows up and changes her costume to something that works better for her and doesn’t so thoroughly sexualise her. This isn’t all so unpopular but something that isn’t focused on so much, she’s hella ambitious. 

Song I associate with them:

God is a woman because Momo proves that She is/ 

Favourite picture of them:

God isn’t simply a woman, she’s Momo Yaoyorozu 

Uraraka Ochako

Favourite thing about them:

Uraraka is probably my favourite character. I adore how determined she is. I love that even when she fails, she changes her methods of doing things and learns new things cause she refuses to be stagnant. She’s compassionate and kind and there are so many underrated moments of her literally saving the day and doing amazing. She’s so blunt and whilst I don’t think that many of the characters are scared of Bakugou, I love how unperturbed she is by him and the fact that she’s always willing to throw down. People focus largely on the rescue aspect of her and that’s a big part but the girl also enjoys fighting. 

least favourite thing about them:

I really wish that she got more panel time outside of thinking of Deku. I do think we as fans exaggerate how much she thinks about him and she’s had amazing moments outside of him but I just really want her to get a proper arc.

Favourite line:

“I want to save people.” I adore this line because it really shows her growth. There’s never anything wrong with wanting to make money for those you love but I definitely think that before Uraraka saw heroism as a way to getting what she needed rather than something that might have been worthwhile within itself. But here in this quote, she’s seen hero work as something entirely different and just experienced a highly traumatic situation and instead of that pushing her away, it pushes her closer. This kind of feeds into my hc that heroes didn’t really work within her area because it was a highly poor area that didn’t offer clout in the same way that bigger cities did so UA is her first proper interaction with heroes and all of it is nothing like she imagined. 

BrOTP

Definitely the Dekusquad cause their friendship is so wholesome and sweet. More specifically Deku, Iida and Ochako, the original three. I also really love Kacchako as a brotp. Uraraka is the annoying girl who keeps on giving him shit but with a smile and Bakugou absolutely loses it but also respects her a lot. He actually said her name and that means a lot to me. 

OTP

Momochako as said before, Ochajirou, MomoOchaJirou but also Minachako, Meichako and Iidachako and Izuocha when I’m feeling a certain way. I ship this girl with a lot of people lmao

NOTP:

Kacchako, this ship used to my OTP and was my first introduction into BNHA but I think I just prefer them as friends cause I don’t feel or like the ship anymore even though I love the art from it. 

Random headcanon:

I’m gonna give future Ochako hc’s because I did a longpost on her childhood. Uraraka with a buzzcut and tattoos is everything to me. I also hc Uraraka as not being born and raised in Japan. She’s half Ghananian on her mum’s side but was raised in the UK until her dad decided that they should move to be closer to his dying mother. It takes her a while to adjust especially because she didn’t really fit in but she does. You can still hear the British accent. Also, she owns an agency with Deku and Iida cause the original three and is ranked in the top five. I once read a fic with that and it stayed with me for life. She had a relationship with Deku but they broke up and she moved past wanting to be like him. She never has kids because she knows how hard it was for her parents but she adopts a boy that she stumbled on during a mission and takes him as her own. Also, she’s the traitor cause I want it lol

Unpopular opinion:

She’s a lot more than Deku’s fangirl. There’s a lot more to her than Deku. She’s strong and growing stronger and finding her place as a hero and discovering who she is. All without him. Whilst I don’t think its ever healthy to bottle your feelings, she’s not simply doing it for him, she’s doing it for her and cause she wants to be better. Hori can’t write female crushes but there’s nothing wrong with her being inspired by Deku and hopefully, if Hori stops being a coward we can get an exploration of the darker side of Uraraka’s crush on Deku. She’s a lot grittier than people think. She literally was willing to drop a whole stadium of rubble on someone so she could win. She jumped onto Deku cause she thought he needed help even when she didn’t understand. She came third against everyone else in the entrance exam. This girl isn’t soft. She doesn’t have the luxury of being soft and messing up cause she’s doing this all for her parents. She’s all glossy sugar layered over a centre of steel. 

Song I associate with them:

Fight Song! Cause she pushes forward and never gives up. Insecure but she doesn’t have the time to stop

Favourite picture of them:

She is the mother I never had. She is the sister everybody would want. She is the friend everybody deserves. I don’t know a better person.