#but no it’s fine cause they’re bad guys
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Yes, the Sith are based on Nazis.
“Freedom“ you mean the freedom to kill anybody who doesn’t conform to what they want? That’s who the Sith are.
“Empowerment.“ I’m sorry since when is basically empowering themselves to the detriment of others OK? That’s not empowerment that’s being selfish. That’s what they are. And they follow the Nazi ideology to a T. Eugenics? Oh yeah, they were on it. Allowing themselves to be swayed by power for the pursuit of power not to help anybody else but for their own personal interests? Oh yeah, that’s them.
And by the way, your earlier session which you erased because it was just dumb. Palpatine is not based off of Donald Trump. Palpatine was based off of Richard Nixon. This is something that anybody who with any sort of knowledge of Star Wars should know. Again, if you’re going to make an assumption, at least do your research instead of Using ignorant comments.
I like the idea of the acolyte because it did show a different point of view, but the thing of it is that you forget the acolyte is not the good guy. You can still have a villain protagonist and that’s OK. But the acolyte Osha is not the good guy. She murdered people. So did her sister. They are not good people, but that’s OK. You can have despicable protagonists there’s nothing wrong with that but they’re not supposed to be in the right. Considering the fact that Osha is going down the path of the dark side. You know the path in which they basically say “screw anybody else that isn’t me.”
Also, the Jedi aren’t real nice in that series. It shows the fault of a few Jedi. Nowhere is the order criticized, except for an ignorant senator who has no clue what he’s talking about. Because I can assure you in the movies they make a clear. “compassion or what I like to call selfless loveis something the Jedi teach. So you might say we are encouraged to love.” That’s a direct quote for the movies. The Jedi are not some sort of hateful cult. Also, I think it’s funny that you’re OK with the Sith who caused genocide after genocide. Have no regrets about it. These aren’t people with a “different point of view.“ These are people diametrically opposed to good. And even the one Sith Lord that they tried to make out as a “good guy“ was more or less an invention told to a pathological liar by a pathological liar.
Again, you can like bad guys and that’s fine. But don’t pretend that their ideology has any merit because again these are the bad guys and we’re not supposed to follow their example. Even the acolyte started to lean towards the fact that maybe just may be following the guy who says that he wants to murder people because that’s his “freedom” isn’t a good guy. And it’s not someone you should be following.
The Sith are Nazis and it's never been subtle
This one ended up being really long. I spliced in some images when I could to break it up easier.
One of the things that causes the most friction in the world is the idea of morality. I know, that's the most water is wet statement ever said but I think people really miss just how much the nuance of morality goes over people's heads. Subjective, objective, relative, from a baseline we understand that there are different types of morality but I don't think people really grasp how much a persons personal morality can be wildly different to any another given person's, especially among people who share spaces like fandoms. Morality is shaped by personal experiences, there are personal experiences that are 99% ubiquitous among humanity like "Pain" that form the basis of everyone's moral compass, then there are the major cultural touchstones that no matter what your morality will be affected by, religion, nation, race, all that what have you. Everyone has an opinion on the Christian Church and that opinion is informed by your morals. People who have been abused by members of a church will have a very different view of the morality of a religion compared to people who have been raised Catholic compared to someone who was raised agnostic compared to someone raised agnostic and is queer compared to someone who has been raised Catholic and is queer compared to someone who has been raised Catholic and is queer and is also rich and so on and so forth you get it.
Morality is not a binary thing, and it's not a nine point grid either D&D, it's more like one of those circle charts that Jojo Stands get ranked on. You know the ones that always seem to show up in anime? I don't know what they're called. Except instead of a circle it's more like a ball, and everyone has this horrible looking 3D balls covered in bumps and spikes and dips and holes.
Why am I opening this ramble with a ramble about morality and religion? Because I'm on tumblr. When I decide I want to ramble about something I read the tags and see what the vibe is, see what people are saying about things. I'm not part of the "Fandom", I don't know the discourses, I see that there's Anti-Jedi and Pro-Jedi and "Stanikins" and all of these different labels and battlelines, and then I read about how people on either side are feeling attacked and harassed by people on other sides. I have no idea how real this is, I have no idea what kind of minefield I'm about to walk into. I'm just rambling about my thoughts and feelings about Star Wars because I like it and I'm a little extra aware that this one is going to ruffle feathers.
Because people are fuckin' worked up about Jedi. There are people who are making it part of their identity that they are anti-Jedi. And it's been happening for years, decades even. Because the experiences and trends of nerd culture has been pushing against systems and religion since I was a baby. Nerds being obnoxious atheists and smugly telling people "God isn't real" was basically the norm when I was a teenager, and before I was born nerds were dealing with being called evil and satanic. Nothing I'm rambling about here is new, in fact using D&D as a touchstone I think the current trend for nerddom's interaction with religion is ambivalence, despite faith and divine power being such an important part of D&D, there's basically zero interaction with divinities in 5e, and when there is it's hostile and has an asterisk against it. I'll do a ramble about this one day too
But the Jedi stuff is interesting to me, because there's a lot of directions people come at for it.
There's people who argue against just Jedi because they're a religion. There's people who argue the Jedi are slavers or kidnap children. People think Jedi are super beings who lord over everyone with their power. People think the Jedi force people to suppress their emotions and personhood. There are people who think Jedi are moral supremacists who silence and kill anyone who thinks about the Force differently from them.
I have some "Pro-Jedi" arguments to make but I'll save them for a different ramble, because this one's supposed to be about another group of people.
The people who think, from their point of view, the Jedi are evil.
The reason I rambled on so much about people being Anti-Jedi is because very often, these people end up being Pro-Sith. It's an obvious leap, if the Jedi are the problem then the people opposed to the Jedi might have the right idea. If your issue with the Jedi is that they disallow "Attachment", then here's the Sith who are all about Attachment. If your issue with the Jedi is that they suppress their emotions then here's the Sith who are always tapping into their emotions. There is an immediate appeal there.
Then there's the Sith Code, let's give it a read.
Peace is a lie, there is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken. The Force shall free me.
Pretty sweet, Passion is pretty positive, breaking chains and freedom. I can get behind that. The rest of Sith Philosophy is pretty swell too. It's about improvement through conflict. Your struggles make you stronger, makes you better, removes your shackles and lets you be free, but also recognizes that you will have to do whatever it takes to do so. The Jedi seek to wipe out the dark knowledge you attain, so you must sequester yourself and hide when you must hide, and strike when you must strike. It's stance could be summed up as something like... "The sacred mission of a Sith is to preserve the Sith Order's most valuable elements as you raise yourself to a dominant position, and all who do not are chaff."
There are people who are really into this. Like, really, really into this. They talk about how they apply this mentality to their real life. They describe themselves as Sith. There are also people who are only kind of into this, they think about positive Sith characters and make headcanons about the good things Sith do.
I need to stress, for those people, that what I am about to say is not hyperbole. I will provide sources.
The Sith Code and Philosophy is Nazi Propaganda. It is literally lifted from Mein Kampf. That quote I used to sum it up is a paraphrased quote from Britannica.com. That's Hitler.
The Sith Code was invented to be in opposition to the Jedi Code, its purpose is to twist a preexisting code to make you think the alternative isn't so bad and it uses codephrases to do so.
Passion, Strength, Victory, Chains, being Free, these are words that we have presubscribed meanings for, but what do they mean in the Sith Code? What IS Passion? What IS Strength? What IS Victory?
Most people I interact with see Passion as Love, passionate, exciting love, the exact thing the Jedi reject. But that can't be it, where's Palpatine's love? Where's Maul's? Where's Vader's?
Passion is obsession. The kind of obsession that will lead you to burning everything down if you don't get what you want. It's not letting anything stand between you and your goal, even if that thing is your goal itself.
Let's break the code down here.
Peace is a lie, there is only passion. We start with the obvious twist on the Jedi code, an immediate refutation of the Jedi's first line. It stands in opposition.
Through passion, I gain strength. We've already done Passion, it's a nice little dressing up of "Being a raging psycho"
Through strength, I gain power. Strength is often intermingled with power, but it's often spoken of interchangably with being able to set aside morals. The Sith isn't an amoral monster who just killed a bunch of kids, he's just STRONG enough to do what needed to be done
Through power, I gain victory. Power isn't a code word. Power is Power, Power is what it's all about and there's no hiding it. In the Sith way the only thing that matters is that you are powerful enough to kill your rivals and stand on top.
Through victory, my chains are broken. The Force shall free me. I think the notions of breaking chains and being Free is the cleverest part of the Sith Code's propaganda kit. It's still seeing use in The Acolyte and it's still convincing people that the Sith are right, even when the guy who's calling for freedom mercs a child then and there.
The Sith are not misunderstood heroes. They're Nazis. They're facist might makes right would be autocrats trying to convince you they're right so you'll validate them and prove them right.
Sith Philosophy is self defeating. Following the Sith Code means you need to define yourself on your conflict, meaning your conflict can never end. For all its claims of being free and breaking chains you can never be free of what drives you or you will lose the strength it gives you. To break your chains you need to hold onto them tight, and you can never let them go.
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Im rewatching OBX again and when John b said im only using her when he said another thing to Sarah and then kie told Sarah you said you were using her I would of been like uhhh what I lowkey would of been pissed and walked off to see if John b would of chased after me kinda want this made into a fic if you want if not please ignore it LOL
pairing: john b routledge x kook!reader
a/n: sarah's better than me bc i would've cried over this scene lol
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This was a bad idea. You told yourself it was a bad idea and still went through with it, so you only had to blame yourself.
Your whole life you had seen the Pogue versus Kook dynamic for yourself; you just never thought you’d become a piece of it.
John B gave you a sense of adventure, of something new. Running to Chapel Hill with him had been so easy. You were usually a ball of anxiety, but he made everything seem like it would be okay, no matter the outcome.
Which led you here, walking your bike through the wooded area of The Cut with John B by your side. You knew it wouldn’t be easy to try and get along with his friend group, but unfortunately, where John B went, JJ, Kie, and Pope weren’t far behind.
“I’m really nervous about this, John B,” You admitted as the Chateau came into view. “She’s not gonna be happy.”
John B shrugged slightly, apparently not realizing the bomb he was about to implode in his own house, “She’ll be fine. It’ll be cool, I promise.”
You shook your head, not really convinced but also not wanting to cause a scene over it. “So you guys found the gold, but under an axe murderer’s house?”
“Well, yeah. Kind of. I mean, the only thing is the well is super sketchy deep.”
You looked over at him, the excitement in his eyes making you slightly jealous that you’d missed out. Normally, you’d run at the idea of half the shit they got themselves into, but John B’s presence was almost addicting.
“Wish I was there,” You joked, leaning into him slightly as he took the bike from your hold so you could walk closer to him.
“You will be, tonight,” He smiled at you, warmth taking over as you blushed. John B had managed to make it feel like you guys had been close friends your whole life, and you were slowly falling in love with that feeling.
“Is um… is that okay?” You knew it wasn’t, but you had to ask.
John B shifted the bike into his casted hand, reaching the other one over for you to grab so he could squeeze it. “Yeah, it will be. And if they push back, we’ll figure something out. Vlad and Val gotta stick together, right?”
You nodded, but John B could tell you weren’t convinced and it was a little bit of a hit to your confidence. Kiara had never really liked you, instantly envious of your life and the way John B, JJ, and Pope always had heart eyes when they saw you. She saw you as a threat and that meant she wouldn’t be happy about your involvement in the slightest, especially when she put together that you were more than friends with John B.
“You’re a bad liar, but I’ll go with it,” You teased quietly, “If she’s gonna get territorial, I’m not fighting her, John B.”
“Hey, hey, just listen.” John B tugged on your hand so you’d stop walking and face him. “You’re a part of this too, okay? You got us the plat map. You got me into Chapel Hill. Your dad offered to cover for me. Once we get with everybody, they’re gonna be excited.”
You tried to let his enthusiasm sway you, but it wasn’t working well. And as Kiara walked out of the Chateau to see you on the couch next to John B, you knew you were right.
“No fucking way. You brought her here? So what? She’s in on this now?” Annoyance and anger were evident in her voice and you shrunk back into the couch as she practically bitched at you.
Pope shrugged. He had always thought you were super nice. He delivered groceries to your home and you’d overtipped each time, knowing the money was needed more in his pocket than yours.
“Look, all I care about is her cut comes out of your share,” JJ pointed toward the boy sitting next to you. “No offense.”
You shook your head at JJ, a small smile on your face. A winky response told you he was kidding. Similar to Pope, you’d seen JJ plenty at the country club when he played server for a few hours. You tried to request him each time you and Sarah visited, keeping him away from Rafe, Topper, and Kelce as best as possible. And you didn’t do it to prove a point, you did it because you cared. You’d watched some of the best people in your life get treated so poorly just for living on the other half of the island.
“You know, I don’t remember taking a vote,” Kiara continued, “This is our thing. A Pogue thing. We were all extremely comfortable until you brought her.”
You tried to refrain from rolling your eyes at her unnecessary anger. “Stop talking about me like I’m not here!” You defended.
“Then leave.”
JJ coughed on his weed pen from the chair next to you, obviously uncomfortable with the growing tension. “I… am remaining indifferent.”
“Do you even know what that means?”
“Of course, I know what that means, Pope, I-”
Kiara glared at both boys, upset that it seemed nobody was taking her side.
You shook your head, realizing this was causing more trouble than you intended. “I told you,” You mumbled to John B.
“Told him what, exactly? That you’re a liar?”
All niceties went out the window at the accusation and you faced Kiara with an anger you’d hidden for a while. “No, that you’re a shit-talking bitch! You know nothing about me, Kiara. And you just hate me for no reason, so-”
“Everybody shut up!” John B yelling had you flinching back into your seat, the emotions overwhelming as silence fell around you. He looked at the curly-haired girl standing in front of you. “Kie, you are my best friend, right? And Y/N, you’re…”
The hesitation in his voice made your heart skip but you nodded in agreement, wanting nothing more than to push past the friendship boundary into something bigger.
“...You’re my girlfriend.”
Kiara crossed her arms over her chest. “She’s your girlfriend now? What was all that talk about you were just using her for information? Get a map, cut her loose.”
The snide comment hit you like a smack in the face as you glanced over at John B. The way he refused to look at you told you it was true and you frowned. “You said you were using me?”
“No?”
“Yeah, you did.” Three voices agreed in return and you closed your eyes in frustration.
Another strike to the heart. Shaking your head to yourself, you got up off the couch. “I’m just gonna go. Thanks for ruining another good thing for me, Kiara. Always appreciated.”
Without another word, you shoved open the screen door and let it slam behind you. Tears blurred your vision as you grabbed your bike from its spot against the house and started walking.
John B was yelling your name behind you, but you refused to stop. The back of your hand brushed away tears as fast as they came. You knew, you knew this was a bad idea. You were so quick to trust someone with your feelings and it always bit you in the ass.
“Hey, hey!” His Converse crunched leaves on the ground as he tried to catch up to you.
You tossed your bike aside when he grabbed your shoulder and you turned to him to let him see the full result of his comment. “Why did you lie to me?” You asked, voice cracking against your wishes. “John B, I told you I was already nervous to get involved with her, and then you… you just used me?”
“I’m sorry! That- it wasn’t like that! At first, yeah it started off that way, but love walked in, okay? I didn’t expect it, but I’m not gonna act like it isn’t true,” He defended.
You laughed and looked away from him. “God, I know better. I know better and I still let you walk in my life and take what you needed because I wanted you. I still want you, even knowing you just used me to your benefit. That’s not love.”
John B opened his mouth to argue but apparently couldn’t find the words. You shook your head and pulled your bike up from the ground, shrugging out of his grip as you climbed on. “Hope it was worth it, John B. Tell Kiara she won, again.”
--
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#outer banks x reader#john b x reader#john b routledge#john b routledge x reader#outer banks#john b outer banks#john b imagine#john b#john b x you#john b routledge x you
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Stomach Flu
Buddie x reader
Wc: 1700 ish
You laid in bed trying desperately to fall asleep. Some kind of stomach flu had found you and was clearly trying to kill you. All night you’d been fighting blankets because you'd be hot and then freezing and then hot again. And when you'd thought maybe you'd gotten comfortable the nausea would hit.
The toilet was your new best friend. You’d spent a decent amount of time clinging to the bowl for dear life. It was worse than any bad night of drinking you had ever had.
So now you were momentarily a comfortable temperature and not as nauseous so you didn't dare move as you begged for sleep to come.
Next thing you know the bed is jostled aggressively as Buck jumps onto the mattress and asks, “You're still in bed?”
The sudden movement sends a jolt of pain through your skull and nearly causes you to puke. You launch yourself out of bed and into the bathroom. Falling to your knees, you empty the non-existent contents of your stomach.
Eddie is knelt beside you a moment later. He takes your hair in one hand and rubs your back with the other.
“Ugh. My best friend, we meet again,” you mumble into the toilet bowl.
“Again?” Eddie asks. “What do you mean again?”
Rolling your forehead across the arm supporting your head, you glance at him and notice Buck in the doorway. “Well this is like the thousandth time I've been here since yesterday. I think I'm dying.”
Eddie runs his hand over your head then presses the back of his hand to your forehead. “Baby, why didn't you call us?”
“You were working. I didn't think I needed help puking my guts out.”
“One of us could have come home,” Buck says. “Or we could have brought supplies home.”
“Supplies?”
“Soup, Tylenol, tissues, maybe…” Buck listed.
“I'd just puke it back up. Everything in comes right back out.”
“Alright, are you done for now? Do you want head back to bed?” Eddie asks.
“Moving makes me more nauseous. And my head hurts.”
“Have you had any water?” Eddie asks.
“Tried. Failed.” You lean back and the world spins. “This sucks.”
Eddie shifts you so you can relax back into him. “I bet. We're going to get you back into bed and get a bucket so you don't have to come lay on the floor in here anymore. Okay?”
“‘Kay.” You snuggle into him, enjoying his warmth.
Eddie manages to get up and lift you without too much jostling. “Can you go lay on the bed and I'll give her to you?” He asks Buck.
“Okay.” You hear the jingle of Buck’s belt and then the clank of it hitting the floor. Next, your set gently on the bed cuddled close to Buck, his arm your pillow.
“You're warm,” you announce and you press yourself even closer and move your head into his chest.
“I'll be back soon,” Eddie says. “Try to get some sleep if you can.”
You whine, not wanting him to leave. “Where are you going?”
“Back to the station. We need an IV kit, fluids, zofran, and probably Tylenol.”
“I don't want an IV.”
“Sweetheart, you're very dehydrated,” Eddie explains. “If you can't keep down water then you need the IV.”
You sigh. “Fine.”
Buck chuckles and presses a kiss to the top of your head.
Eddie leans over and kisses your head then a quick parting kiss to Buck’s lips. “Love you guys. I'll be quick.”
“We love you, too.” Buck says.
A minute later you hear Eddie’s keys jingle and then the front door open and close.
“Sorry I woke you like that earlier.”
You snort a laugh. “Not your fault, you didn't know.”
He runs his fingers up and down your side and shoulder in random patterns. “Try to sleep,” he suggests.
“Can you tell me a story?” you ask.
“What kind of story?”
“I don't care. It's just soothing to hear you talk,” you tell him. “Might help me sleep.”
He starts to tell you all about flamingos because he knows how much you love them. He explains everything from how they get their color to their migration patterns and before long you feel yourself sinking into a peaceful sleep.
You wake to the sounds of Buck and Eddie laughing. You can tell they’re trying to be quiet but the giggles are shaking you and the whole bed. “What's so funny?”
“Crap. Sorry, we didn't mean to wake you,” Buck says.
“It's fine. I need to pee anyway.” You shift to roll onto your back but end up leaned against Eddie. “You didn't tell me what was funny.”
“Just a dumb video on TikTok,” Eddie explains. “How're you feeling?”
You take a moment to consider your answer. Your head still hurts but not as much. You still have nausea but it's much more bearable. “Shitty, but kind of better.”
Buck rolls and then stands before offering you a hand. “Come on.”
“Where are we going?” You reach over to take his hand, noticing the IV line for the first time. “I slept through that?”
“Bathroom,” Buck answers.
“Exhaustion will do that,” Eddie answers your second question.
Buck helps you up and your muscles protest the change in position. He wraps an arm around your waist as you sway slightly.
You take a deep breath and blow it out. “I'm good. Let's go.”
Eddie stands and grabs the bag of fluids you hadn't noticed hanging on a command hook on the wall.
All three of you head to the bathroom together and as you sit you look around. “I like this view of the bathroom much better than the other.”
“I prefer this, too,” Eddie says. “Especially the knowing you're not as dehydrated.”
“Yeah, you already look so much better than this morning,” Buck adds.
You slowly make your way back to the bed and as you're making yourself comfortable you catch a glimpse of the clock. “Holy crap! How is it almost 11?”
They both just chuckle. “That's what happens when you sleep for three hours,” Eddie explains.
“I think that's more sleep than I got total all night. Guess I needed a better pillow,” you laugh as you look at Buck.
“You could have had that all night if you'd called us. I'm going to go make you some soup,” Buck announces as he leaves the room.
“I'm not hungry.”
Eddie sits down beside you. “You have to try a few bites at least, okay?”
You pout at him. “I don't want to puke anymore.”
“You shouldn't. I gave you some zofran,” he tries to sooth you.
“Fine.” You roll your eyes “But you better have that bucket close by.”
He presses a kiss to your forehead. “It's on the floor right here, but you're not going to need it.”
“You're awfully optimistic given that I'm still nauseous.”
“You said you felt better,” he chastises. “Is it still as bad?”
Leaning back into him, you explain, “I said I feel shitty. Shitty is better than feeling like death. I'm less nauseous, but still nauseous.”
“I'm sorry you feel shitty,” he intertwines his fingers with yours and lifts it to kiss your knuckles. “The soup should help you feel less shitty. Hopefully you're just nauseous because you have nothing in your system. So just try a few bites, okay?”
Buck returns with a tray in his hands. “I have soup, the old fashioned chicken noodle just like you like. I also have saltine crackers, oyster crackers, sprite, and water.” He sets the tray in front of you and then leans in to kiss you.
You pull away quickly. “Don't kiss me. You'll catch this plague.”
“I'll risk it.”
You lift the spoon and drink a spoonful of the broth and then you pause, waiting for the nausea to get worse. When it doesn't, you continue slowly with more broth and then eventually the noodles and a couple crackers.
Eventually you manage to eat almost half the soup and a few sips of water before you set the spoon down. “I'm done. I can't handle any more right now.”
“That's fine. You ate way more than I expected,” Eddie says.
Buck takes the water and sprite off the tray and sets them on the bedside table before taking the rest away.
“Can I have my hand back yet?” You lift the hand with the IV line and give him your best pouty face.
He shakes his head. “No. I will unhook the fluids when that bag is gone but I want to keep the IV lock for now until we're sure you're going to keep all that down.”
You roll your eyes. “Fiiiiine.”
He laughs. “Do you want me to have to poke you again if you do puke more?”
You stick your tongue out at him. “No.”
“Thought so.” He boops your nose. “Glad to see you're feeling better.”
Buck returns and snuggles in beside you on the bed. “You want to pick a movie to nap through?”
You smiled and they both groaned. “Sleeping Beauty! Oh, wait, Enchanted… no, I actually want to be awake for that. Sleeping Beauty for sure.”
“Why do you make us watch princess movies when you know you're only going to watch ten minutes?” Buck complained.
“Because it's fun.” You shrugged. “Plus, then I get to dream I'm a princess.”
Buck raises an eyebrow. “Are you saying that if we switch to football as soon as you're asleep you're going to dream about that?”
“Probably.”
“Sleeping Beauty on one condition…” Eddie started.
“What?” you asked.
“Next time you get sick while we're at work, you call us immediately.”
“No,” you argued. “Because there won't be a next time. This is awful. I don't want a repeat.”
“Fine. If! If by some small chance it happens or if you just get the sniffles… you call.”
“Deal.”
Eddie gets the movie set up and you make yourself comfortable. This time you use Eddie as a body pillow and Buck drapes his arm over your waist.
The movie starts and you almost instantly feel yourself drifting. “Love you guys.” You mumble as you close your eyes.
They chorus an “I love you too,” as you fall into a dreamless slumber.
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is this controversial . i made it for laughs and jokes and giggles
#renfield 2023#lest we forget all the people rebecca and renfield kill throughout the course of the movie.#eliminate the idea of a ‘bad guy’ who ‘deserves to die’ from your mind and you’ll realize they’re also murderers ! in the movie i mean#obvs there’s tons of people renfield’s killed offscreen but i’m talking solely abt the movies events rn#by kill i mean.#or i guess. well. led to their deaths#by bringing them to drac#anyways#look me in my eyes and tell me rn that these characters are not ALL murderers#and if you remove the whole ‘good/bad’ dichotomy from your mind you’ll realize we watch renfield kill SOO MANY PPL LOL#but no it’s fine cause they’re bad guys#totally. lmao#all i’m saying ! everyone here KILLS#or HAS killed#or wants to. lmao. i bet teddy’s never killed anybody#but yannow he is in a crime family so i assume he is complicit in murder all the time even if he’s never done it himself#this is way too much text for a little silly meme. i’m shutting up now lol
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You know what would be really funny, is if people came together to have an anti-crab day. A day where every user who joined prior to automattic’s acquisition logged off for 24 hours to show that yes, actually, older user retention is important and you should listen us just as much as new users
The users giveth, the users taketh away
#this isn’t about the sidebar btw I’ve already said I don’t mind the sidebar#I think it could be a better sidebar like the 2014 tumblr layout which was great#but it’s Fine (tm)#this is about live and the new post editor and the apparent avatar removal bs ‘experiment’#and it’s also about how these big overhauls keep being done meanwhile we can’t have like. a search function that works#or the queue reordering tools that already exist on mobile web applied to any other platform#you know. all the little stuff that’s comparatively easy to implement yet they ‘don’t have time’ for because they’re too busy#with these massive overhauls and ignoring all the asks that go to wip#also I don’t expect anyone to actually do this and I’m sure as hell not organizing anything cause that’s a lot of work lmao#but I think giving them money pre-emptivelt just showed they can do whatever they want and we’ll fall for it#taking away money would be more effective#idk I don’t think current staff are any better at running tumblr than yahoo was#they’re just better at the ‘we’re quirky and relatable just like you guys uwu’ bit#and a lot of us fell for it but I think the illusion is starting to lift#anyway idk it sucks here but all the other sites are either worse or empty so what can we do#(genuinely wtf can we do this nonsense is getting bad)#text#misc#shut up nerd#new layout stuff
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STOP DOING THIS IN INJURY FICS!!
Bleeding:
Blood is warm. if blood is cold, you’re really fucking feverish or the person is dead. it’s only sticky after it coagulates.
It smells! like iron, obv, but very metallic. heavy blood loss has a really potent smell, someone will notice.
Unless in a state of shock or fight-flight mode, a character will know they’re bleeding. stop with the ‘i didn’t even feel it’ yeah you did. drowsiness, confusion, pale complexion, nausea, clumsiness, and memory loss are symptoms to include.
blood flow ebbs. sometimes it’s really gushin’, other times it’s a trickle. could be the same wound at different points.
it’s slow. use this to your advantage! more sad writer times hehehe.
Stab wounds:
I have been mildly impaled with rebar on an occasion, so let me explain from experience. being stabbed is bizarre af. your body is soft. you can squish it, feel it jiggle when you move. whatever just stabbed you? not jiggly. it feels stiff and numb after the pain fades. often, stab wounds lead to nerve damage. hands, arms, feet, neck, all have more motor nerve clusters than the torso. fingers may go numb or useless if a tendon is nicked.
also, bleeding takes FOREVER to stop, as mentioned above.
if the wound has an exit wound, like a bullet clean through or a spear through the whole limb, DONT REMOVE THE OBJECT. character will die. leave it, bandage around it. could be a good opportunity for some touchy touchy :)
whump writers - good opportunity for caretaker angst and fluff w/ trying to manhandle whumpee into a good position to access both sites
Concussion:
despite the amnesia and confusion, people ain’t that articulate. even if they’re mumbling about how much they love (person) - if that’s ur trope - or a secret, it’s gonna make no sense. garbled nonsense, no full sentences, just a coupla words here and there.
if the concussion is mild, they’re gonna feel fine. until….bam! out like a light. kinda funny to witness, but also a good time for some caretaking fluff.
Fever:
you die at 110F. no 'oh no his fever is 120F!! ahhh!“ no his fever is 0F because he’s fucking dead. you lose consciousness around 103, sometimes less if it’s a child. brain damage occurs at over 104.
ACTUAL SYMPTOMS:
sluggishness
seizures (severe)
inability to speak clearly
feeling chilly/shivering
nausea
pain
delirium
symptoms increase as fever rises. slow build that secret sickness! feverish people can be irritable, maybe a bit of sass followed by some hurt/comfort. never hurt anybody.
ALSO about fevers - they absolutely can cause hallucinations. Sometimes these alter memory and future memory processing. they're scary shit guys.
fevers are a big deal! bad shit can happen! milk that till its dry (chill out) and get some good hurt/comfort whumpee shit.
keep writing u sadistic nerds xox love you
ALSO I FORGOT LEMME ADD ON:
YOU DIE AT 85F
sorry I forgot. at that point for a sustained period of time you're too cold to survive.
pt 2
also please stop traumadumping in the notes/tags, that's not the point of this post. it's really upsetting to see on my feed, so i'm muting the notifs for this post. if you have a question about this post, dm me, but i don't want a constant influx of traumatic stories. xox
#writing tips#writing advice#writing help#writblr#how to write#fiction writing#for writers#on writing#writing stuff#writer life
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Have enough mecha on my plate to watch and can’t keep up with weekly shit so I plan to watch grendizer u when it finishes airing which would be relatively soon now that I think about but there’s like one thing about it that’s not entirely related that’s been on my mind, that being the art style.
Now it’s not a bad art style by any means especially when it’s the Eva artist doing it-and yes have your opinions about that show, but his art style is undeniably good and it got better post Eva with this show proving that-and I think they translated the characters nicely, like Duke very different very twinked LOL but he could look way less then himself but you can still tell it’s Duke. (And Sayaka with purple hair weirdly works)
But this and infinity just shows mazinger likely going to have a more modern art style and possibly if we’re lucky enough to get non mazinger stuff, all dynapro mecha adaptions to come after are likely gonna be in a modern art style and I’m just thinking to myself: if we somehow get another getter anime we have to live with the fact the last show to have getter’s original art style was arc and I don’t hate arc but MAN I hate how instead of them trying to refine the art style by actually giving them budget their just likely gonna change what made getter getter.
#meg text#for mazingers case it’s not like controversial levels of other adaptations I. E. crybaby where the characters are barely recognizable#if getter goes with that it’ll be fine and if they get budget visually it’ll look so much better than arc#but I’m sad knowing also if we get a prettier getter anime it’s not gonna have the actual art style because they will probably modernize it#the different faces and distinct body types are going to be LOST#which is why mazinger doing it is less of a big deal cause they had one big guy but they also keep boss the way he is#and for getter they’d probably respect the look of the getter 3 pilot but man ryoma and hayato likely are gonna be too similar#they’re probably gonna make Ryoma a pretty boy fucking twink and yes that already happened with devo but MAN#I’m never gonna get a pretty ryoma again even if this’ll be a slightly better fate then arc ryoma#(and again I don’t hate arc hating it is stupid and I can forgive the bad animation with context but arc ryoma is ewww)#every day I ask how the fuck they messed up his hair
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slumber party
in which there's only one bed. fem bau!reader x spencer reid
fluff! warnings/tags: dark humor, (the word molest is used jokingly once but in my defense your honor its completely on brand for early seasons cm humor, if u cancel me u have to cancel the whole cast those are the rules, its just a joke cause reader always flirts w him aggressively, pls don't come for me i have a wife and children and three boyfriends to take care of,) mutual pining, bullying and death threats as flirting, they love each other so much and bicker like children, glasses spencer, (moans), emily and rossi are mentioned bc canon means fuck all to me, i think thats it but this is my most out of pocket duo so if i'm wrong lmk a/n: just a silly little thing that i cooked up, not a masterpiece but i think its cute!! I hope u enjoy!! lmk what you think!! looooveee youuuu
“Oh, there is no way.”
Your duffel bag hits the dingy carpet as Spencer is still closing the door behind you.
“What? Is it—”
You give him a look over your shoulder, eyebrows raised as if to say, what are you going to do about this?
But he only manages to meet your eyes for a split second before they’re back to the singular queen bed, darting over the white sheets and pillows like he might find another mattress if he looks hard enough.
Sharing a room with Spencer, you can handle. You've done it before. Whenever the team has to pair up at a hotel, you two are an obvious choice. And while you occasionally butt heads, mostly you adore each other and it's great.
But sharing a bed is a whole other situation.
One you were not prepared for. And evidently, neither is he.
Watching his big anxious eyes flit around the room nervously, you feel sort of bad for your reaction. You know you can be a bit… abrasive, sometimes.
“It’s fine, I’ll just—I’ll see if I can share a bed with Emily or JJ in their room—”
Just then there’s a knock at the door. Spencer looks relieved to have something else to focus on, turning back around and quickly undoing the latch again before opening the door to reveal your favorite raven-haired SSA. Emily leans past the doorjamb, eyes immediately honing in on the awkward sleeping arrangement.
“Oh my god! You guys too?”
“What?” You and Spencer ask at the same time. Emily raises her eyebrows at this and glances between you, but otherwise doesn’t comment.
“Me and JJ only have the one bed. I thought it might just have been us.”
You frown. There goes your plan of sharing a room with them.
“What about Morgan and Garcia?”
Spencer snorts.
“Something tells me Penelope wouldn’t be too torn up about it if that's the case.”
“Hotch and Rossi?”
The room goes quiet and a little chilly as the thought disturbs everyone equally. Emily frowns deeply.
“I don’t even… I can’t picture that.”
“Can we please not try to picture it?”
“Great. Okay, well. I just wanted to make sure everyone is suffering equally. Good luck, champs.”
“Thanks,” Spencer mutters dryly. Emily smiles, eyes darting between the two of you for just a moment too long, before pushing off the door frame and disappearing from sight. Once the door is closed again, a heavy silence ensues. “I’ll… I can take the floor—”
“It’s fine, Spencer. I’m not going to make you sleep on the floor. We’re both grown-ups. Besides, we like each other, right? It’ll be like a slumber party.”
“I’ve never had one,” he admits. His glasses slip further down his nose as he frowns. Your fingers itch to push them back up.
“Then I’m happy to be your first,” you tease, facing him fully with your hand on your hip and barely resisting the urge to add, I’ll be gentle. “Do you want the shower first or can I?”
Spencer has a habit of looking you up and down like he doesn’t realize he’s doing it. Some might find it odd, but his utter lack of social graces is, lucky for him, incredibly endearing to you.
“You can have it first,” he says, meeting your eyes again. “Just don’t do that thing where you get the entire bathroom soaking wet.”
“Aw. But I love doing that. It’s my favorite part,” you tease, scooping up your bag once more.
Twenty minutes later you’re emerging from the bathroom with damp hair, clad in loose shorts and a college hoodie.
“Nice outfit,” Spencer says from the spinny-chair at the desk, examining your outfit choice with a scrutiny you wish you’d been prepared for. Really, you wish you’d known ahead of time you’d have a roommate and brought some alternate sleeping clothes. “I had no idea you felt so passionately about… Scooby Doo?”
“Shut up right now,” you grit, tossing your bag into the corner of the room and tugging your hoodie down over your cartoon-patterned shorts as far as you can.
“What?” He’s laughing as he brushes past you on his way into the bathroom, bearing his own bag. “It’s a good look for you.”
Your face is burning as you choose the side of the bed furthest from the door. Springs creak underneath your weight as you sink down, sitting with your legs hanging off the side for a moment before swinging them up onto the mattress, leaning against the headboard and side-eyeing the empty space next to you. There’s really not very much of it. The bed feels even smaller than it looks.
From the bathroom you hear the sound of the shower squeaking and starting up again—a cacophony of droplets against tile on the other side of the wall. You try not to be nervous as you imagine Spencer filling the space beside you in just a few minutes, hair wet and in pajamas. And yet you spend each second wondering if he’s almost done, wondering if the shower will finally sputter to a halt, and once it does, wondering how long it’ll be before he’s out again. It’s ridiculous how impatient you're getting—and by the time you finally watch the door knob twist you feel crazy.
“I think that was your longest shower yet, Dr. Reid.”
The teasing affords you a moment to ogle him head to toe, taking in his choice of pajamas—tonight, familiar plaid pants and an MIT crewneck—as well as his hair which has already begun to dry. Briefly you wonder if he does that thing guys do, where they lean down and haphazardly dry their hair with a towel because they have no concern for its texture whatsoever. But you kind of doubt it, because his hair always looks so soft.
“You were sitting here waiting for me?” He chuckles, and honestly you’d been expecting a shyer response. But you adapt quickly.
“Maybe I was. Big spoon or little spoon?”
“Ha-ha.” He opens a drawer in the dresser and begins unpacking his clothes into it. It's a funny habit of his. You never unpack your duffel. “You took the better side of the bed.”
“Uh, yeah. I’m the woman. I get to do that.”
“Well you should know that if an intruder breaks in, I’m not fighting him off. You’d probably have a better chance than me.”
“And my chances will be even better if he’s distracted with you first.”
“So I’m just bait?” He scoffs, looking back at you. Strands of wet hair hang so prettily around his face, like the perfect frame around a work of art. You smile sweetly from your spot on the bed before playfully biting at the air in his direction. The message goes unspoken but reads loud and clear. Of course you are. You make such good bait.
That gets a blush out of him and he has nothing else to say as he turns back to his drawer. Happily you lean back against the headboard, stretching your legs out and bouncing slightly in place. Beneath you the mattress springs groan and squeak in protest.
“I hope you're not going to be this irritating all night.”
It's clearly lighthearted, but you promptly stop and frown at his back.
“Call me irritating again and see where you end up sleeping tonight.”
“I just don’t see how you’re even more hyperactive than usual right now. Has anybody ever told you that you’re crepuscular?” Spencer asks, finally sliding the drawer shut and going to shut the overhead light off. Your eyes narrow.
“Obviously nobody has told me that.”
“It means y—”
“I’m most energetic within the few hours around dusk and dawn. Contrary to your belief, Dr. Reid, other people are also capable of looking up words in a dictionary and remembering what they mean. Are you going to stand in the corner all night or are you gonna come to bed?”
“I am,” he scoffs, clearly embarrassed and shy and embarrassed of being shy. “I’m just… you look like you kick in your sleep. And hog the blankets.”
You shrug, folding your knees to your chest and hugging them quaintly.
“I’ve never had any complaints. In fact, you should be so lucky to share a bed with me. All five star reviews, baby.”
You toss a suggestive wink in at the end, which seems garish enough to break the tension so that Spencer can stop lingering in the corner like a sleep-paralysis demon and move to carefully take his place next to you. He almost mirrors your position, but his legs are too long to quite manage your level of compactness and so they simply fold underneath him. A few silent moments go by, in which you have the dumbest smile on your face and you keep glancing over to the side, waiting for him to be looking back at you.
“This is already the least relaxed I have ever been in a bed.”
“Good thing we’re not going to sleep yet.”
Finally he looks at you, a casual mix of hesitance, concern, and moderate curiosity coloring his features.
“We’re not?”
“Oh, my god, Spencer,” you snort. “I’m not gonna molest you. We have to do slumber party stuff, remember?”
He flushes again, glancing at the digital clock in his bedside table.
“But it’s late. We should go to sleep.”
“At slumber parties you have to stay up until you literally can’t keep your eyes open anymore. Those are the rules. I don’t make them.”
Still, your insistence that you follow the international code of sleepover law goes unabided by Spencer. He simply leans over to flick off his lamp, bathing the room in darkness.
“I appreciate the effort,” he says, and your eyes haven’t adjusted but you can hear the rustle of sheets and blankets as he gets under them, “but unfortunately we have to be awake and alert in five hours.”
“You’re no fun,” you huff, but climb under your own side of the cover and scoot down until you’re flat on your back, covered in blanket and hands folded on your sternum.
Spencer doesn’t respond.
It’s silent for maybe five minutes, during which your brain doesn’t slow down at all. Maybe you are crepuscular. Or slightly nocturnal. You have nothing but energy.
In an attempt to get comfortable, you try adjusting your position.
The mattress squeaks.
You do it again.
Another squeak.
A second goes by, and now you’re intentionally jostling about, squeaking the mattress as much as you can.
“Would you stop that?” Spencer says, voice already gravelly with sleep. You manage, but you’re already devolving into a fit of giggles. “I’m going to smother you with this pillow,” he threatens, but you hear the disgruntled smile curling his words.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m just not in the mood to rest.”
Another moment passes. He sighs deeply. You smile into the dark.
“What are you in the mood for?” He asks flatly, and you’ve won.
“Tell me a secret,” you immediately demand in a hushed tone, flipping on your side to face his back. “Something you’ve never told anyone else.”
“I don’t—”
“Shh! You have to whisper it. Those are the slumber party rules.”
“I don’t have any secrets,” he whispers, clearly flustered, and to your delight, rolling to face the ceiling. “None that you’d want to hear.”
“Oh, now that’s just not true. You’re an enigma, Spencer Reid. You fascinate me.”
You’re only sort of kidding.
“I… fascinate you?”
“Completely. You know, ever since you moved your desk across from mine I get distracted just staring at you and wondering what you’re thinking about. But you’re very… hard to read, sometimes. I think it’s because you’re a Scorpio.”
“The position of the stars at the time I was born has no bearing on my personality.”
“Fine,” you concede, still in a glorified stage whisper. “But that doesn’t mean you don’t display the archetypal Scorpio traits. You’re all brooding, mysterious. Kinda, I don't know... intense and sexy and unknowable…”
“Sexy?” He laughs, breaking the whisper rule. You grin and let it slide. You’d hoped he would catch that one.
“Hey,” you snap, losing the smile immediately and lightly shoving against what you hope is his shoulder. “You’re supposed to be telling me a secret, damnit. I won’t let your wiles and charm distract me from getting what I want.”
“When have you ever let anything stop you from getting what you want?”
Truly, your cheeks are going to start aching with this constant back and forth between poker-faced and huge Cheshire smile.
“Stop flirting and answer my question, Reid.”
With the amount of times you’ve made him sigh tonight he must be dizzy. You chew your lip apprehensively in the silence, picking a loose thread on your pillow. It’s so pitch black in the room, you can’t see him where he lies only a few meager inches from you. But you can feel his presence. You can feel the unexpected bass to his voice when he’s tired and speaking this lowly, which you’ve never heard before.
“All the secrets I’ve never told anyone are just… depressing.”
Your heart sinks a little at the way he swallows between words, like that in and of itself was hard to admit. Unthinkingly your hand slides into the small gap of white cotton between the two of you.
“Not very good slumber party material, I think,” he laughs self-consciously.
“You’d be surprised.”
The sentiment comes quieter and more serious than you’ve been all night. If only you had the words to tell him that he can tell you anything. That you want to hold his secrets for him under lock and key. That you would never, ever do anything less than offer him kindness and support—even if it doesn’t always seem that way when you’re teasing him.
“Do you have any secrets you’ve never told anyone else?” He murmurs eventually, so soft it could kill you.
And you do. There are plenty of dark ones, probably not all dissimilar from those he’d elected not to share only a moment ago.
But you don’t bring those up.
Instead, you decide to admit to something silly. Still, it makes you nervous as you feel it coming loose in your chest. You’ve really never told anyone this, and it’s perhaps more vulnerable than you’d realized before the words were already leaving your mouth.
“I, have…” You pause to laugh at yourself, and continue on. “I have a stuffed dragon that I take with me on every single case.”
“You do?” Spencer laughs, so loud and unexpected it almost hurts your ears, angling his head toward you. Blood rushes to your face.
“Yes. He usually sleeps in bed with me. He’s an excellent listener and has been the origin of several of my most genius breakthroughs. You remember Gibson Cooper?”
“Family annihilator from Houston?”
“Correct. He’s in prison because Oscar helped me make the Cook Creek Campground connection between the O’Hara and Diangelo families.”
“You have a stuffed profiler dragon named Oscar? Is he here?”
“He’s—I mean, I wasn’t expecting to share a room with someone.”
“So he’s in your bag.”
“Yes,” you seethe, “and I will not be introducing you to him. He doesn’t do well with men.”
“You are genuinely psychotic.”
You huff.
“Fine. I’m sorry I told you anything.”
You’re about to roll over onto your other side—but Spencer surprises you by catching the hand that had been outstretched in his direction. He carefully intertwines your fingers and squeezes gently.
“You’re right. That was mean. Thank you for telling me about Oscar.” His tone is surprisingly teasing, and you’re so uncharacteristically flustered by this rare show of physicality and affection that you can’t muster an adequate comeback. Spencer doesn’t seem to mind filling your silence, though, sounding a little more solemn now. “I’m sorry I don’t have any secrets for you.”
The way his voice gets all thin and scratchy sometimes—it’s like the earnest sincerity just pours out of him. He can’t control it. He can’t be anyone other than who he is. Maybe that’s a part of why you love him so much. You wonder if he knows how much you love him. It’s not exactly a secret—anyone on the team would be able to tell as much. You’ve been relentlessly teased for the way you are with him. For your batting lashes and your lingering touches and your unabashed flirting. But beneath it all is true affection, and nobody doubts that.
“It’s okay,” you decide with a squeeze of your own, after a moment of deliberation. “You’ll think of something. ’Cause, y’know—you’re stuck with me for at least a few more days.”
“Oh, god,” he laughs, and releases your hand, rolling over to face away from you. But you don’t mind. You’ll get lots more time to invade his personal space over the coming week or so. “Goodnight.”
“Sweet dreams,” you sing-song, turning away to face the wall with what is perhaps your biggest, stupidest smile yet.
#spencer reid#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x you#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fic#criminal minds imagine
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I feel like poly!marauders would have s very funny debate around group halloween costumes. Lots of Sirius being dramatic and James pouting. Only for reader to do a couples costume with Barty.
Love your writing!
hahaha aweee poor boys
poly!marauders x fem!reader who isn't matching with them on Halloween [576 words]
CW: ....none I don't think? the boys' theatrics? a prank? pouting?
“For the last time, Sirius, no.” Remus groaned, earning him a disbelieving scoff from Sirius and a whine from James.
“But why, Moons? It’s perfect.”
“It’s not perfect, it’s ridiculous.”
“It’s whimsical.” James interjected.
“It’s embarrassing.”
“Halloween costumes are supposed to be a little embarrassing!” Sirius argued, earning him a head tilt from James.
“Well, now, I don’t think they’re supposed to be embarrassing. Maybe…funny? Quirky?”
“I don’t care what they’re supposed to be, we are not dressing up as the big bad wolf and the three little pigs.” Remus declared with an air of finality, causing Sirius to deflate rather spectacularly.
“Well what do you suggest we dress up as, then?” He muttered just as you entered their dorm.
“Uh oh. Why’s Sirius got his pouting face on?” You commented as you pulled off your school robes. Sirius turned his pout towards you and gave you his best puppy dog eyes.
“Moons is being s’mean to me.”
You made a sympathetic cooing sound that had Remus rolling his eyes before you took Sirius’ face between your hands and kissed his pouting lips.
As you pulled your lips away but not your face, you whispered to your grumpy boyfriend. “Was he being mean to you, or did he just say no?”
Sirius balked at you as Remus let out an inelegant snort and James’ laughter bounced off the stone walls of their shared dorm.
“You know what? Fine, screw all of you. I’m going to wear whatever the hell I want and you all will just have to figure out your own costumes.” Sirius huffed as he pretended to turn away from you, only for him to fold the second you started to walk away and pull you into his lap.
“Wait, wait. You guys haven’t figured out your costumes yet?” You asked in disbelief, clearly wondering how the three of them could put so much thought and planning into their pranks and mischief, yet completely fumble Halloween.
“Well…no?” Remus asked as James blurted “what do you mean you guys?”
“Guys, I’ve had my costume planned for weeks!”
“Weeks?” Remus parotted.
“Weeks.” You insisted.
“But…” James started helplessly. “I…I thought we were going to match?”
You looked somewhat sympathetic for him, but grimaced at your admission. “Someone else asked first, bubs.”
“You’re matching someone else?!” Sirius shrieked as he all but threw you off his lap so he could look at you.
“Oh for Merlin- yes.”
“Who?” The three boys chorused with varying levels of theatrics.
And the next night, one could find three pouting marauders sitting dejectedly in the Gryffindor common room dressed as the three blind mice under the suggestion of their girlfriend. Their girlfriend, who was currently wearing matching costumes with Barty Crouch Junior - a pirate and his Treasure.
Remus might’ve found it in him to be a little more miffed about it if you hadn’t looked so sodding good in gold and bedazzled all to hell.
“Note to self,” James muttered defeatedly, “spend less time planning the Halloween prank and more time on the Halloween costume next year.”
The end of his sentence was punctuated by screaming when the multiple 12 foot skeletons lining the room started walking on their own accord.
It was way less funny than they had imagined it would be when Barty threw “his booty” over his shoulder and took off out of the portrait hole.
“Duly noted.” Sirius sighed as he took another swig of his drink.
#ask elle#marauders era#marauders au#marauders fanfiction#reader insert#self insert#sirius black#remus lupin#james potter#poly!marauders#poly!marauders x reader#poly!marauders x you#poly!marauders fluff#poly!marauders imagine#sirius black x reader#sirius black x you#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#james potter x reader#james potter x you#the marauders#marauders x reader#poly marauders x reader#poly marauders x you#marauders#ellecdc fics#best friend barty crouch jr#best friend!barty
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CW: vent post / health issues & death mention
dear god i need this doctors appointment over with already. the suspense and anxiety are literally keeping me from getting anything else done. how is anything else on earth supposed to matter when in a few days i may receive news that my life expectancy just got cut down
#cw vent#cw health issues#cw death mention#death mention#vent#vent post#Seven’s Public Diary#okay. deep breath. i’m getting ahead of myself here. it’s probably not that bad. i’m probably gonna be okay#i just really don’t want to die young. i haven’t even lived my life yet like hoooold on there internal organs#don’t shut down yet i still need u guys!!! we’ve still got a life to go live!!!#it’s gonna be okay. they’re gonna be okay. i’m gonna be okay. there is still time.#i really don’t need to be freaking out about it. i’m just as likely to die in a car crash on the way to the hospital before i even find out#we could all die at literally any moment. no point in freaking out if my life expectancy gets calculated to be a little shorter#i just hope. that it’s only a little. if any shorter at all.#anyways if u see me being here being insane on main it’s because i’m having another confrontation with my fear of death#don’t worry about it#i hate to be depressing on main but i can’t bring myself to bother anyone with it so i shall overshare on my blog once again#which is totally fine cause no one reads these anyways#*looks around suspiciousy*#…right?
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Smalltown!Neglected!Meta!Reader x Yandere!Batfam ☁️ Part Three
☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️
Part One ☁️ Part Two ☁️ Part Four ☁️ Part Five ☁️ Part Six ☁️ Part Seven ☁️ Part Eight
☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️
A/N: I’m realizing I’m struggling to find a good breaking point for reader, cause I want reader to break. I’m terrible at coming up with conflict though. (I’m not much of a writer, but I’m trying.)
A/N: There will be Romantic Yanderes. But, we’ll get to that later when we talk about each yandere. (Most will be platonic or start platonically at least.)
A/N: Hopefully y’all are noticing that Reader is in this constant state of just trying to cope. (If I wrote it correctly, that is.)
Warning(s): Yandere themes, Obsessive behavior
☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️
So, Reader’s childhood crush shows up looking fine and kind
Alfred informs the others of the unexpected guest.
Bruce isn’t home, Damian is out with Jon. Stephanie and Cass are busy in Gotham, Duke’s out on Patrol, Dick’s in Bludhaven, Jason meeting this guy is a bad idea, and Barbara’s at work.
Tim, being the only one home on a rare break (in reality working cases in the Batcave) is practically ordered to scope this guy out.
Which annoys Tim, because Reader is just fawning over their old crush and the truck.
The truck is surprising, not something he expected Reader to want. But, reader is practically crying over it.
Tim would have just brushed it off, but he notices how this guy keeps touching reader.
Practically clings to Reader. Even sniffing unaware teary eyed reader. (Teary eyed reader is…. Cute.)
Tim makes eye contact with this guy, and he looks… smug. Like he won the grand prize.
And, it pisses Tim off. (Why is he so smug? What does he know that I don’t?)
Childhood crush isn’t staying long, he’s going to catch a flight back to the smalltown.
Reader happily offers to drive him to the airport and Tim just hops in the backseat of the truck. (Why? Oh, I just want to get out of the manor for a bit. Hope you don’t mind.)
Childhood crush is peeved, but hides it from Reader. (Tim can tell. He’s a detective, it’s his job.)
The entire ride is Reader and Childhood crush reminiscing and catching up on smalltown gossip.
Tim is listening in on everything with intrest, realizing he knows practically NOTHING about reader. (Didn’t bother researching cause he was pissed and didn’t consider reader worth the effort when he had more important things to do.)
Now, he’s getting to see a side of Reader that no one in Gotham has really seen yet.
Reader is funny, approachable, a hint of a flirt, apparently sings, loves to spend time with people they care about, and a slight geek.
Tim is a bit entranced/intrigued. But, his biggest concern is Childhood crush.
Why is this guy so possessive of reader? What does he know that Tim doesn’t? Something’s amiss, and he’s going to figure it out.
(And, maybe he should get to know Reader some more. They’re trying to make him feel comfortable in the truck, including him in conversation, sharing happy memories and information with him, willingly. It’s nice. It’s soothing.)
Eventually, Childhood crush is dropped off at the airport. But, not after he tells reader, there will always be a place back home for them and to come home soon. We miss you. I miss you. Come Home.
The ride back to the manor is done in comfortable silence. Or, at least, to Reader.
For Tim, he has a lot to think about.
What does he know about Reader? What more is there to Reader? He wants to know more. He wants to know everything.
He asks questions on the way back, occasionally breaking the silence.
Reader happily answers, expecting this will change things between them.
It does for Tim, but not as much for Reader.
Tim jumps into discovering everything he can as soon as he gets back to the BatComputer, but he’s not ignoring reader anymore. He’s almost friendly. (He’s still busy as mess. Not much time to hangout.)
Which makes reader feel better, because Duke and Cassandra disappear for about two weeks after that. (Mission.)
Reader worries and wonders where they are.
Bruce says the two are taking a ‘small vacation’.
(Reader knows he’s probably lying, but in the off chance he isn’t, Reader feels a bit put out.)
Reader is really leaning on those phone calls to their friends and family. They spend hours talking on the phone while pacing the halls, their room, and the garden.
Everyone back in the town wants them home. They miss Reader soooo much. They just understand reader more than these rich city people.
They can’t wait for reader to come home visit.
Damian and Reader eventually have a confrontation.
Damian finds Reader cooking in the kitchen.
(Alfred lets Reader cook, and Reader helps occasionally with dinner and meals.)
Reader offers food to Damian, a peace offering.
Damian, obviously, rejects it.
Doesn’t matter that he’s vegetarian or if he’s not hungry, he was going to reject it regardless.
And then he verbally tears into reader.
Insulting everything about them, the food, their actions, their attitude, their clothing.
Nothing is off limits. (Damian’s had a bad day and is pent up. He wants an outlet and Reader is right there and the object of most of his doubts.)
Reader shuts down. Going cold and looking startlingly blank. (Eerily reminding Damian of Batman Bruce.)
After this all attempts for Reader to bond with Damian stop.
(Sometimes you just gotta cut your losses.)
It doesn’t help that Damian one day hears Reader on the phone when they’re pacing the halls.
Talking sweetly and softly to someone in such a loving voice. Before hanging up with an ‘I love you.’
Damian initially begins to try to interrogate reader. (Who was that? Are you having relations with someone? Does Bruce know?)
Only for reader to bluntly state that they were talking to their younger brother and it’s none of Damian’s business before brushing past him.
Damian would grab at them, but he’s a bit stunned.
He knew Reader had another brother. Bruce was going to try to bring him to the manor. (Still is trying to bring him to the manor.)
But, now doubts start to creep in.
Because he wants that. That unconditional love Reader so willingly gives to their brother.
He wants that love. He wants someone to say ‘I love you’ to him like it’s as easy as breathing.
Damian brushes it off at the moment, but it sits with him. (He’ll fix things eventually. He’ll apologize. He’ll have that one day. He will.)
#yandere dc#yandere batfamily#yandere tim drake#yandere batfam#dc x reader#yandere batfam x reader#yandere bruce wayne#yandere damian wayne#platonic batfam#yandere batfamily x reader#batfamily x reader#batfam x reader#platonic yandere#smalltown!reader
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can i get nsfw headcanons about any naruto characters? your choice !!
characters: gaara, kiba, kakashi, shikamaru
cw: cum, anal, vibrators, dick sizes, fem reader with fem parts
a/n: hope u enjoy! also i’m writing for them during the time naruto and hinata got married (?) i know they were like 19-23 or 24
GAARA !
when you two are alone: he likes when you lay on him n he rubs your back inching his way down to you ass, rubbing it and kneading it in his hands.
twerk on this man, give him a lap dance i swear to god he won’t be disappointed by anything you shake. his eyes will be wide and he’ll have the biggest smile on his face, if y’all are drunk and doing this then you’ll definitely be fucking wherever you are at. Most likely will come in his pants..
his balls are tight and full, not big but average size for his age. Loves when you just lay next to him and invade his space then slipping a hand in his pants to massage his balls; especially when he’s cramping there to.
he’s not much of a sex guy but definitely prefers dry humping over the real dick in the ass thing, if yknow what i mean. you 2 just get the grind on..slow and sensual. & by dry humping— he’s not humping you like a wild animal, just dragging his boner across your leg/thigh. You do the same..just without ur panties (^_^)
Don’t get me wrong..he’ll have sex and release his load in you or on you a few times— he just has a..in between sex drive (?) basically: sex isn’t always on his mind unless you propose to it and if he’s having a rough day (which is almost everyday & barely resorts to sex to get relaxed) anywayss. With that being said i really feel like he likes to take sex slow so your foreplay will last about 15-20 mins and another 20 while he’s kissing every crack and creavice of your body.
⤴︎ i also feel like he’s big into role play. Like yes, i’ll be the princess and you’ll be the evil big bad wizard that needs my love and touch. Or yes you can be the UPS guy and i can be the mom of 2 college and highschool kids during the summer waiting for my dildo to arrive because me and my husband divorced a few months ago
he don’t lick pussy he SUCKS pussy. he don’t give you fast kitten licks he will head straight for the clit and suck on it like a pacifier and rub it when he’s done.
his cum has an easy flow and isn’t too thick but he spurts out a lot. Also average size with an average girth, 6.4 inches at best🙌🏾
KIBA !
biggg ash, GIRTH && LENGTH WISE. i’d say 6.6 at least. n he lovesss it when you whine and tell him it don’t or won’t fit & try to push him back a bit by his abdomen or run. just for him to grab you by the hips/waist and start pounding into you
unlike gaara he will dive in and lick your pussy clean. sorry not sorry, he has no pussy eating technique and does what he saw a man do on a porno he seen when he 12 years old. yeahhhp
why fuck one hole when you can fuck 3? we all say in usion. He’s an anal god & prefers the butthole than the vagina or mouth.
speaking of mouth..he likes a little teeth on his cock, not a lot tho😗 cause it “tickles” he says.
Guys..he does not have breeder balls..i’m sorry :(. They aren’t small they just aren’t as big but they don’t sag either..they’re TIGHT. tight like if he was to go soft rn his ball sacks would be a futon for his penis
also has bad ball cramps and whines so much when you can’t or won’t help him with it. But “its fine” he says, just don’t beg for any dick post- shark week 😒. && to top it all off he is a MASTER MASTURBATER. when he got with you he stopped watching porn and used his imagination with you being the the source of material.
sleeps bare butt ass naked with his balls all out jus free ballin like we’re in the paleoithic age💀
ass eater ass eaterr. he don’t care if you ain’t shower this morning he wants to go in and down. He’s a free and wild man when it comes to sex, LITERALLY.
whines the most and hates to admit it but he just can’t help how tight you are. Like you wrap around him just right and it makes him come on the spot sometimes
they don’t mind a bush or fuzzy peach. But kiba is the one to cry when you shave or get a wax down there 😗 the others don’t mind if it’s hairy, a little hair never hurt them and plus “we grown” kakashi, kiba and SHIKAMARU say in harmony 😭
+ all of the character listed above
KAKASHI !
always and i mean alwaysss has to have a hand on your ass and tits. it’s not even in a horny or sexual way— he just wants to squeeze and feel the squish of your body. Unknowingly massages them to and you don’t even point it out, then he’s moving his hand looking down at your nipple like “why is it hard?” man you just gave top tier massage that could clear migraines and cramps.
his dick is big and he knows ittt. Sitting on his lap is enough for his dick to go in ‘up mode’ he will nottt back down or let YOU back down when you tease him and try to leave him by hiself with a hardon, no ma’am..you’re gonna finish what you started.
never fully gets naked when you two are having sex. his shirt is off, pants down and his dick coming out the deisgined hole of his boxers. Your bra over your tits and panties pulled to the side.
he lives in the country and rural era of konoha so yes you suck his dick and he eats you out on his back patio, what about it?
doesn’t want you having any dildos, he doesnt know why it makes him so upset you need a FAKE cock to make you cum when you have him. The only sex toys he’ll allow is a vibrator and butt plug. Speaking of vibrators, he so fascinated by the way your plump pussy lips move when you use it😫
preps you all the time, you two could’ve been fucking since the day you got together, he’s still gonna prep you either way cause mans is BIG. he’s more of a shower than grower tho 😗
6.7in when soft and 7inch hard. His girth isn’t wide..it’s more on the skinny side but he reaches places better with the size and length. Once you cried so hard and almost reached your breaking point when his thrust kept getting deeper and slower cause he was hitting the entrance to your cervix and lord was it painful yet pleasing at once.
his balls are average but they sag, not low but they got some weight to em on the inside 😭
SHIKAMARU !
wants to makes movies with you and has made movies with you. But it’s premium tho so only you and him only see it.
always and i mean alwayssss has a hand in your panties or on your thigh. You two would be chillin in the living room, the floor or in the bed (most of the times the bed) and he’ll just sneak his through and just rub your clit. he doesn’t finger you just rubs you slowly, occupied with his phone and your pussy while he’s just strolling through social media and getting you off all at once.
fav position is most likely doggystyle. Why? because if you both are getting your freak on and wanting to watch something..you can do both.
lazy sex..need i say more? he’s got you laying on top of him with his dick barely all the way inside you and giving half ass thrusts while you both are half away and naked at the crack of morning
hates pulling out, says it ruins the good feeling when you’re about to cum. Naw sweetie he just wants to be a dad of a cheerleading team. He might wanna be one and done or 2 kids but the way he cums inside of you..😗 it says otherwise. he doesn’t even pull out till you guys wake up, and if he did so you can go pee and get it out your system— he’s gonna ease way back in and go to bed like that 😭
another sagger and shower but not a grower. He’s average, length and girth. 6.6 hard and 6.6 soft. It’s just limpy yknow?.
also sleeps naked well semi-naked. but you? oh he makes you strip down to your socks and earrings. he wants you skinned down to the toess. He only sleeps in a bare of boxers and time out time he uses rhat as his advantage. won’t even take them off to pull his dick out. he either slips it through the hole of his pants or over the hem of the boxers. Somtimes doesn’t even take it out himself and gets you to do it by grinding it agaisnt you or pulling you closer to it.
cums a lot and cums whenever and wherever tbh. on your face in your mouth, wipes it off for you tho. One thing he lovessss to do is slap his tip on your lips or cheeks he just loves slapping his cock all over your face anyways
#naruto headcanons#gaara smut#gaara of the sand#gaara#gaara of the desert#gaara x reader#naruto gaara#kazekage gaara#naruto imagines#naruto smut#naruto#kakashi smut#kakashi hatake#kakashi sensei#kakashi x reader#kakashi#shikamaru nara#shikamaru x reader#naruto shikamaru#shikamaru x you#shikamaru smut#shikamaru headcanons#shikamaru#bainutwater85#multifandom account#multi fandoms posts#multi fandom blog#kiba inuzuka#kiba x reader#kiba smut
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A Changed Future (1): Yandere Isekai
When you woke after an especially tiresome day the last thing you’d expect was to reawake in a room that looked nothing like your own
The house, the neighborhood, your job everything was not your own
Instead, it’s resembling a webtoon you remember seeing the marketing, edits, and spoilers for
And if it was all adding up right you’d find the horrifying truth behind the controversial protagonist of the story would be incredibly true
“Look I’m sorry I yelled…I love you…I’m really hungry. Can I eat today?”
The beautiful and practically perfect protagonist was the one who trapped their love interest inside their–now your basement
Chained to the floor on a chair in the dark with unfinished surroundings was the poor victim of the yandere protagonist
Haruko, is an average guy who previously caught the protagonist’s attention by standing up to one an influential pair of elitists in defense of their crush but that’s hearsay
In the former protagonist's atmosphere the children of the rich were victims to their family’s whims often protecting their wealth rather than their children
Which caused Haruko to defend his friend from their overbearing parents
That is when the protagonist suddenly fell deeply in love with the average fellow
Obsessively stalking him and eliminating their rivals by any means necessary
finally snatching their love and running to a small little home where they planned to have their dreamy life
Of course, after breaking his spirit and having Haruko develop some kind of stockholm syndrome
To find that you’ve been isekai’d is jarring
But being a protagonist that had the internet raving for years about how unhealthy they were is awful
But it was nothing when you were standing at the top of the stairs and watching the malnourished man call out to you
“Yeah….sure.”
Naturally you calm down, enough to make the poor guy something to eat and drink
Excusing yourself to have a breakdown in the bathroom before coming up with a plan to fix it all
“Y-you’re letting me go?”
“Yes, I won’t stop if you want to go to the police…but I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t.”
You felt so selfish
But you weren’t the one who imprisoned him
Now that you were though you were going to turn a new leaf
After feeding him, clothing him, and giving him a hefty sum from the protagonists savings
You go to their place of work where they’re in line for a promotion
“I quit.”
“E-excuse me (L/n)?! But your about to become the vice president of the company!?”
“I know. Sorry?”
You almost feel bad turning down the CEO who visits to try and reason with you
In your opinion, the protagonist didn’t deserve any of their success
They technically didn’t need it because they were stacked
Same could be said for the detective thats been constantly asking the protagonist questions
“You are actually agreeing to talk with me?”
“Yeah.”
“Did you hit your head?!”
With the knowledge from spoilers and ads you’d seen, you knew that the worst part of this story is that the protagonist is doing just fine while Haruka continues to struggle with his captivity and manufactured feelings
You want to do this right, whether you were meant to live in this world from now on or would one day return to your own
But in the meantime you’d do what you felt was right
Turning their life—now your life around to somehow try to condone for all the crimes they’ve done
Unfortunately, though things don’t seem to want to go your way
“Please Please take me back!”
“What?”
“You heard me! You were right you’re the only one who loves me! I love you! Please! Please! Take me back in your basement!”
“Okay?”
It seems that once you released the poor guy he returned to society
Expecting to be welcomed by his friends and family upon being missing for years
Who instead had moved on or had benefitted from him being declared dead
He tried to go back to working but he couldn’t get you out of his head
Not the one that ranted about adoring him and the one that would go days without feeding him
But the one that cried when you saw his skin bruising in his chains
The one that fed him a hot meal
The one that helped him relearn to use his weakened legs
The one that keeps apologizing for every little thing you do
That’s the you, he likes
And he’d much prefer he turn back to being a victim trapped in your basement if it meant having you back in his life
“I don’t mind if you stay here if you need but I’m not keeping you trapped here. I won’t do it anymore.”
He cries and bangs his hands on the floor when you officially tell him
But he’ll take you up on your offer to move in with you
“Good morning (Y/n)! Since you quit your job you’re getting up so much later now. You’ve got to be careful waking too late.”
“Uhm how do you know I quit my job?”
“Unless you're locking me in the basement you don’t need to know!~”
He’s like a weird roommate who occasionally asks that you restrain him in some way
Purposefully rummaging in your storage to find ropes that you haven’t thrown away yet or buying them himself and leaving them out
“Ooops~! I did leave a chain out while cleaning! I’m so bad, being so careless even though you’ve been so against it. I should be punished! I know, you should tie me up! Right? Right? Right?”
He’s going insane everytime you refuse his demands to be locked away
You’re even sweeter now that he’s not locked away and that’s not helping
He’ll ultimately decide he should try it
“Hey (Y/n)?”
“Yes?”
“You still feel guilty about what you did to me right?”
“...Yes.”
“Then how about you do something for me? To make up for it?”
Even if you know you’ve done nothing wrong
The guilt doesn’t stop you
Letting him lock you in the basement as he repeats some of the same punishments he remembers
Or rather tries to
“I just can’t seem to stand being away from you for a day, let alone not feed you then. I have no idea how you did it.”
You couldn’t be sure either
Which is why you don’t protest as his actions tend to get a bit more…wild
“Like you suggested I did try going for that new job again.”
“Uh that’s good.”
“I know since you’ve left they seem to be desperately searching for extra hands. I’d feel bad for them if you weren’t with me!”
“Right…”
“But being away from you all day is killing me! Maybe I should look for a more remote position.”
He treats you better than the former protagonist did
Quickly moving you up to your old room and just chaining you there
But he wants more from you
More Kisses
More Cuddles
More Romance
More Touching
More Quality time
He takes up so much of it, that the same problems that happened in the webtoon were happening again
Except this time it was related to you
“I’m Revmere the CEO of the Revere Co. I’m wondering is (Y/n) home? I’ve been trying to reach them by phone but it hasn’t been going through.”
“And I’m Detective Cape. Thomas Cape, I also need to speak with (Y/n) and you too if that’s alright Haruko.”
Part 2: Coming Soon
#yandere x reader#yandere x you#lovelyyandereaddictionpoint#yanderexrea#yandere#yanderes#yandere harem#yandere isekai#yandere isekai ocs#yandere original character#yandere original characters#yandere victim#yandere victim oc#yandere detective oc#yandere detective#yandere ceo#yandere ceo oc#yandere ocs#yandere ocs x reader#yandere oc#yandere headcanons#yandere oc x you#yandere oc x reader#yandere oc x y/n#yandere changed future
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feastdance dashboard simulator
💋queen-cersei-defense-squad Follow
it’s so sick that people keep criticizing queen cersei as if she’s not the first female ruler of westeros??? literally elevating bastards and women to her small council is super fucking progressive as is creating the precedent of dismissing unfit kingsguard??
🪨dragonstoner Follow
aren’t all of her children literally bastards born of incest
💋 queen-cersei-defense-squad Follow
oh so now you’re going to listen to stannis baratheon, known misogynist, kinslayer, fornicator, team green supporter, and homophobe, huh.
🦑pykedyke
okay guys i know there’s no “perfect candidate” but you have to vote in the kingsmoot anyways not voting is how someone like e****n g*****y wins and literally anyone is better than him. suck it up and row to the polls
🦈reaveherihardlyknowher
ohhhh not this “vote your crew no matter who” “blue lips man bad” bullshit again. fuck off idgaf which godless man sits the seastone chair i’m not voting for asha shes literally a neoliberal
🦷 lastoftheegiants
first i had to give up my rights and then i had to give up my gods just to not get killed by fucking wights but i literally cannot believe the nights watch made me give up my strap as part of the treasure ransom. shit was expensive it was IVORY. i hate southerners so much i hope the lord commander dies
🌪️kinslayerr
DO NOT COME TO THE RIVERLANDS
🍓silverspurs Follow
why
🌪️kinslayerr
there’s riverlands here
🧜♂️theythemderly
freys
🌾maidencool
my cousin got eaten by rats in harrenhal
🐎brackennation Follow
dumb cunts wearing raven feather cloaks strutting around who think they’re better than you but they’re not better than you
🌟sevenstar
i saw a guy get killed and then just stand back up and start fighting again because his friend kissed him on the mouth down here once
🦌whitehart
giant feral pack of 60 wolves running around
🍓silverspurs Follow
ok understandable have a nice day
🫧bastardwaters
i hate the fucking sparrows can we be normal for five minutes or can we just not have shit in the crownlands
☠️real-stormlands-patriot Follow
ITS LORD COMMANDOVER #RIPBOZO
🐦⬛mormonts-raven-bot Follow
CORN! DEATH! CORN!
(CAW! I follow members of the Night's Watch to remind them of their oaths!)
🦷 lastoftheegiants
????
🍋floriansjonquil
Loras Tyrell x Queen of Love and Beauty!Reader Imagines
Keep Reading
🪻maidens-smile Follow
girl this is notttttt the time he literally just fucking died at dragonstone?
💎oathkeeper
should’ve stanned jaime #LORASFELLOFF
💐flowerknight
one kill yourself jaime lannister is an honorless kingslaying turncloak two i heard loras tyrell was literally fine?
👊fleabottomtop
lord davos seaworth, the class traitor from the stannis baratheon administration, is a nasty little thottie and just died from making it clap in white harbor
🌅girlheir
this tower fucking sucks.
🌅girlheir
i’m just like rhaenyra targaryen for real
🌅girlheir
🐀ratcook5000 Follow
people meat tastes good asf when you don’t have a wench in your ear saying it violates guest right
🐺threeeyedwolf
🍒ladylance
need that targ girl in mereen to get those lizards over here and liberate this website by any means necessary cause what the fuck is going on
#asoiaf#affc#adwd#its been so long since i did one of these. missed it#valyrianscrolls#dashboard simulator
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‘cause i’m that bitch.
pairing: charles leclerc x fashionista!reader.
warnings: nothing! just reader being a bad bitch.
faceclaim: rihanna.
summary: charles keeps trying to tell everyone he’s in a relationship with you, the it girl of the fashion world. yet, no one believes him. he’s very keen on changing that.
— part two of my 500 followers celebration ♡ —
liked by vogue, zendaya and 3,822,728 others.
yourcompanyname: our boss y/n l/n at the cfda gala last night where she was awarded the fashion icon award. pictures of her arriving to, during and after the event.
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ynswife: ‘do my tits bother you? they're COVERED… in swarovski crystals girl!’
-> user1: oh she ate this look up so bad.
user7: i remember when she was still interning for vogue and now she’s one of the biggest makeup and clothing moguls in the world 🥺
-> yourcompanyname: thanks for being with us since the beginning!! check your dms for a surprise! 🙈
user5: that’s my favourite fashion designer!
user6: did y’all see the post-award interview? she was giggling saying she was going to celebrate with someone after getting the award…. i wonder who it was.
-> user9: probably just her best friend. they’re really close and she helps her get ready for events like this.
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
PARTIAL TRANSCRIPT.
— phone conversation between CHARLES LECLERC and Y/N L/N.
CHARLES LECLERC: they don’t believe it! they don’t believe i’m dating you!
Y/N L/N: they’re probably joking babe-
LECLERC: they called me a french twink! i’m not even french!
L/N: i know babe.
LECLERC: we need to ramp it up. can i wear one of your designs? maybe they’ll understand when i’m dressed in your fashion.
L/N: i have the perfect outfits for you. i’ll send them tomorrow!
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
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gqmens: charles leclerc is our new cover boy, dressed in yourcompanyname’s menswear from head to toe.
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landonorris: can you get me some clothes 😩
-> user6: BUY EM 🤨
user2: idc if he’s a stalker, he’s sooooo fine i’m sorry.
-> dumbass1: he can stalk me deadass. go all joe goldberg on me 😍😩
user89: he’s really trying to make us believe that he’s dating her…. we’re not that gullible dumbass!
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
liked by yourcompanyname, vogue and 1,728,727 others.
y/nsfanpage: last night y/n was seen at the movie premiere of ‘material girl’, the second film that she’s produced under her production company!
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user3: queen!! don’t know what looks better, her or the movie!
user8: some vroom vroom guy is saying he’s dating her….
-> user9: imagine 😭
user7: he’s even buying clothes to pretend he’s sponsored by her that’s crazy 😭😭😭😭
-> user5: she needs a restraining order i’m so serious.
user6: she looks so good!! 😍
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
PARTIAL TRANSCRIPT
— phone conversation between CHARLES LECLERC and Y/N L/N.
LECLERC: we need to pull out the big guns.
L/N: if you’re sure…
LECLERC: i just want people to understand and believe i’m dating you. i don’t want people to believe i’m a weird stalker.
L/N: oh babe, i’m so sorry. you know what? i’ll take the day off tomorrow, we can go out and spend all day doing what you’d like to do.
LECLERC: all i want to do is be with you.
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
liked by ynswifey, charlieeupdates and 2,628,982 others.
ham1ltonshaderoom: after initial disbelief from the internet, business mogul and it girl y/n l/n has been spotted cosying up with formula one driver charles leclerc in an art gallery in paris. how are we feeling about this new couple ham1ltons?
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user7: HE STOLE MY WIFE!!!!!! BOOOO
user6: i apologise mr leclerc i was unfamiliar with your game.
-> user7: don’t ever doubt the game of a peculiar white dude.
user78: she looks so good even blurry.
user67: that outfit is crazy he looks like a mime.
-> user23: he’s never beating the french allegations.
user12: first pic is actually so cute!!
user34: i still think it’s photoshopped.
𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃𓂃
taglist: @lemon-lav @firelily-mimi @formulaal @sya-skies @namgification @raevyng @ajvaix @demvnsriot @blupblupfish @ravisinghs-wife @f1kenzzz @d3kstar @wildflowermarns @ironmaiden1313 @evie-119 @decafmickey @nichmeddar @casperlikej @cuteskz @charlesleclercsonlywife @booksandflowrs @mxdi0 @alexmarie29 @iloveyou3000morgan @fate-posts @luckyladycreator2 @23victoria (don’t see yourself or wanna be removed? send an ask!)
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Omg hiii, I just saw your “dating Hugh” hcs and I absolutely loved them... So could you pls write something where paparazzi are just bombarding him with questions about his relationship with the reader since there have been a lot of rumors about them breaking up but him still visiting the reader??? I would just love to see that respectful man handle all the nasty and out of pocket questions paparazzi go for
I LOVE HER ༉‧₊˚.
in which hugh humbles the internet by addressing false rumors
warnings: none, just fluff!
so my dumbass has no self control and i did unfortunately change the plot a little BUT i am planning to write a 2nd imagine on this same plot but differently! hope yall still like it
since working on the x-men movies with hugh, you two have been together ever since. happily, that is.
however somehow, from somewhere, rumors began to circulate that the two of you had broken up after your 23 years together.
and of course, you and hugh took these rumors to the press.
“so we’re aware that the two of you have worked together since the first x-men movie,” the host asks, earning a collection of nods from the two of you. “would you want to go into detail about how you guys began to date and just what the story was behind that?”
“yeah of course,” you began, hugh cutting you off.
he looked directly at the camera now rather than the host, pointing his finger at it in a silly manner, “and as far as i know, we are still together.”
the room erupts into laughter, most of it coming from you as you grab hugh’s other hand, intertwining your fingers in your lap. “yeah, oh my god i don’t know where it came from but for some reason all of twitter and tiktok and whatever else there is thinks we’ve broken up!”
the host smiles, “i saw that, in fact that was actually my next question on my list.”
“so you chose to ask the allegedly broken up couple about how they met and began dating before you ask them if they’re still together?” you joke, causing everyone to laugh once more.
though everyone was focused on your joke, the only thing you could focus on was hugh’s thumb rubbing up and down the back of your hand subconsciously. it was sweet, almost as if he did it without realizing.
“yeah.. yeah i love her so.. we’re not splitting until one of us dies.”
“hugh!” you smack his leg, brows furrowed close to your eyes in a warning manner.
he cocks his head as his eyes go wide, smiling brightly at your concern, “what?!”
“don’t talk about either of us dying, i don’t like that!”
his smile only grows as he chuckles at your rather unreasonable behavior, “alright i’m sorry.”
the host makes eye contact with the camera just as hugh had, “yeah i don’t think they’re breaking up anytime soon, look at them!”
the camera pans to zoom in on you and hugh; you’re still scolding him about how you don’t need to worry about splitting up when you’re perfectly fine while he’s trying to defend himself but is laughing too hard.
“i said im sorry!” he managed to get out, going weak as he brought his head down to your lap, trying to contain his laughter.
you smack the backside of his head gently, leaning to rest on the armrest of your chair as you roll your eyes, “and you’re not even taking me seriously, baby.”
“and they’re still holding hands,” the camera man points out from behind the scenes.
i guess it’s safe to say those rumors shut down, fast.
I HATE THIS WTF i’m sorry the end is so bad
taglist!!
@velvrei @spazwayy @oatmilkriver @sseleniaa @mei-simp @wittyjasontodd @wolverinesangel @realsimpbitchshit @pickuptruck01 @keigohawks @thereallchristine @zeeader @pink-jello-fish @twinky-wink @malfoys-demigod @seamlessepiphany @withafoll @lulawantmula
#hugh jackman#hugh jackman x reader#logan howlett#logan howlett oneshot#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine#wolverine fic#wolverine x reader#x men#mcu edit#marvel cinematic universe#marvel#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool 3#deadpool
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