#but my god; do I ramble sometimes
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Can I just say, thank you so much for writing up all of this, I really, really appreciate it!!! I like knowing what kinds of things people notice, how you interpret my designs, etc. Very fun to read and very informative!!!
I have a strong urge to ramble about some of your comments + these design in general, but I know it's going to be quite boring. So, uh, if anyone wants to see me ramble like crazy, it's under the cut lol
It makes me so, so happy that Hero's pointy "feathers" were recognizable enough as a crown/helmet! I may or may not have stolen drawn inspiration for that from Corviknight (the Pokemon)
No real notes on Stubborn, he's honestly been surprisingly easy to redesign!
Broken's little "shackle" under the shawl are actually just a mark for bright red feathers in the final design because my Broken is based on a Luzon bleeding-heart :]
Also no real notes on Cold, except for the fact that I gave him emo bangs when I first designed him months ago, and I stand by that decision.
I love my final design for Paranoid (it's the second one I've finished, after Hero!), but his silhouette has honestly been kind of a mess to draw for some reason. I really hope that, in the final design, he will be more easily recognizable. And gloves! When I realized it both nicely fits with my vision of Paranoid as a medic/healer and mirrors Nightmare, I knew I had to give them to him :] Of course I talk about Paranoid the most, who's surprised!
Skeptic's shackle in the final design is actually getting replaced with a much smaller one (I was drawing Skeptic right before I started writing this), so that hopefully it's not as on the nose!
Smitten has just been really difficult to design, for some reason. No real notes, except to briefly complain about how he keeps changing every time I work on him :[
The debris in Opportunist's feathers was a very last-minute decision, but I'm very happy with it, it mirrors Witch quite nicely, and also establishes that Oppy can hide small objects (like stolen jewelry or playing cards) in his feathers.
Hunted should hopefully be much easier to identify with his final design - I didn't draw it in his silhouette, but he's wearing the same bandages Beast does!
Fun fact: my favorite thing about designing Cheated is to see how much of his design I can draw with straight lines alone :]
No real comments on Contrarian, except for the fact that I love him and he's iconic <3
Also, I wanted to reply to the tags!!
I absolutely adore this kind of analysis! Thought to be honest, only about half of these were intentional lol
Starting from Skeptic, I actually started thinking more about their poses and which direction they face: like putting Skeptic & Smitten away from each other like you mentioned, Opportunist & Cheated facing forward (for different reasons), etc. But the first half of the voices didn't really have specific reasons for why they are facing which way.
It is very interesting how Stubborn-Broken & Cold-Paranoid pairs worked out though!
Those are, indeed, some silly birds.
I'm finally giving my voices a proper redesign! These are currently just silhouettes (for figuring out their shapes & just checking out how they look next to each other), and the full designs are still WIP, but I'm actually quite happy with how these are turning out! My favorite part was trying to connect each voice with their respective Princess design-wise in subtle (or not) ways :]
If this image is too small, I have it split into two halves under the cut! There, I also put which voice is which. If you don't mind, please let me know if you could recognize them! I'd really appreciate that kind of feedback :]
[Find my Slay the Princess art here] [Princess art] [TLQ art] [Voices art]
Image 1 (left-to-right): Hero, Stubborn, Broken, Cold, Paranoid, Skeptic
Image 2 (left-to-right): Smitten, Opportunist, Hunted, Cheated, Contrarian
Yes, my Opportunist is a tiny gremlin. I am not sorry about that :]
P.S. He's not actually abnormally short. He just looks tiny compared to the rest of my voices - Smitten next to him is 7 ft or ~213 cm tall. Opportunist is 5'2'' or ~157 cm :]
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honestly i definitely think it wasn't *just* teruteru who dabbled in tasting human flesh while in despair and i dont see anyone talking about that
like i really think akane, gundham, mikan and perhaps ibuki, definitely got into that stuff
#ngl ALL of them got into it on second thought#do u think teruteru had a cute little restaurant for junko meat#no in all seriousness though#dunno if anything of the remnants is shown in the animes but they must have done some awful shit#binomi by maretu instantly went in my remnants playlist last night#i just think its an interesting topic overall#love to think of all the disgusting grim possibilities that could be applied to the remnants#might share hcs sometime but#mikan specifically consuming her lover would be an interesting angle#at their twisted relationship. since it intensifies it#and gundham would practically worship her like a god so Of Course he'd get a lil hungry#rambling#danganronpa#teruteru hanamura#akane owari#gundham tanaka#mikan tsumiki
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I would really like to read one piece of writing, amateur or not, that features Apollo and Zeus having a positive relationship. One. Any one. It could be 30 words long for all I care. I just need confirmation that one other writer actively producing content in the Greek Mythology sector doesn't think of Apollo as Zeus' toy, sexual or otherwise, or of Zeus purposefully surpressing Apollo because he doesn't want him to surpass his power, or of Apollo only being obedient to his father over all else because of fear and physical abuse, or of any other reason possibly invented except some sort of mutual understanding and respect.
It should not be this difficult to find content where they do not hate each other.
#ginger rambles#I am at the end of my rope actually#None of my stuff is long enough to post on ao3 but fuck it I'll just post wips here#This is ridiculous#Like categorically ridiculous I feel like I'm going insane#One or two Apollo whumps is fine#cool even when written well#but oh my god everything?? All of it???#Really???#Shoutout to that one fic on ao3 that was doing snapshots of Zeus being a good dad to all his kids#And just hasn't got around to the Apollo chapter yet#I am praying for you Author you hold one of my last threads of sanity#I'll post some stuff about Apollo and Zeus in the early days sometime soon#I'm actually just flat out annoyed now lol#zeus#apollo#writing
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spicy take incoming but i kinda wish ppl werent so desperately attached to and protective of this moniker of Great Big Brother 100% Perfect So True And Real when it comes to childe bc honestly. he really isnt (perfect or even that good at times) and to me acknowledging the ways both he and his family (for enabling him) are in some ways kinda just. doing teucer incredibly dirty in the long term but only with the best of intentions in the short term is so much more interesting than just pretending hes a flawless brother?? like it only adds to the drama and irony of it all man like theyre rly so dysfunctional as a family unit its great. even if hoyos likely never exploring that shit in its true depth it still lives rent free in my head for sure lol
like. you rly dont have to turn ajax into some sort of unfeeling uncaring monster of a shit brother to acknowledge that he does, in fact, repeatedly make incredibly reckless and selfish choices during his SQ with teucer and in general by choosing to obstruct the truth of who he is from lil bro so completely?
like this stuff can be nuanced and coexist with his absolutely 100% genuine commitment to protecting teucers bubble of a worldview (and w the theme of childlike dreams and wishes being so prevalent in general who knows what could be cooking w that one in particular) and his loyalty and love for his family without just having to whitewash the dumb shit he does lmao
like just bc hes capable of and willing to face the potentially grave repercussions of absolute bangers (🙄🙄) like teaching an actual fucking child to consider ruin machines fun besties and 100% insta ready to fuck himself up by protecting teucer at the cost of aggravating his still-unhealed injuries from the liyue AQ when dottores abandoned lab turns out to be more lively than expected doesnt. make that choice not a very irresponsible one yall im begging 💀
like. hes the adult here . the entire situation unfolding as dangerously as it does in the factory is Absolutely all on HIM for not being able and/or willing to disappoint teucer by just . Doing the mature thing and sending him away to safety because HES gotten too attached to this idea of being his lil siblings' loyal knight and perfect brother that Always finds a way to surpass the expectations no matter the cost its a role HE wants to keep playing despite the risk
like its So obviously a pride thing for him too and thats so fucking interesting because Of how flawed and questionable the logic is!! like yes he truly cares about teucer and ensuring he has a great unforgettable time during this impromptu escapade in liyue like thats not up to debate but the point im trying to make is that the choices he makes are Still very much intertwined with his ego and overconfidence and not really based all that much on Whats Actually The Best Approach Here. he improvises a way to give teucer the best mr cyclops outing he has ever seen bc HE wants to be the one offering him that experience and ends up biting off a bit more than he can chew and he can only blame himself for that one and This Isnt Fucking Sustainable
like i dont think that makes him evil but i do think it showcases his arrogance and flaws in a very concrete way and is a part of why calling him a perfect brother or at least one without an asterix just. rubs me off wrong lmao
like idk feel free to keep calling him that if its important to u and all if u want idc (and i do to some extent get why this defensive narrative of insisting hes great no issues at all emerged bc i remember 1.1 some ppl acting like hes childcare satan for how he treats teucer lol) but. at least like . Be willing to chip in to fund the therapy teucers going to need for those lifelong trust issues in the future man 💀
Bc Thats The Other Thing. now tonia and anthon i dont consider a part of this bc at least they Know hes in the fatui and hiding the gory details of ur harbinger job from ur baby sibs is like. fair enough and reasonable. but. crafting an Entire different AU version of yourself and feeding it to your baby brother as what constitutes actual reality surely is a choice of all times like ajax ily but genuinely . What the fuck if you were real id throttle you
AND HIS FAMILY ENABLING IT THE ENTIRE TIME ITS CRAZY LIKE. As a person with multiple siblings both older n younger with some similar age gap cohorts involved. God id snitch so fucking fast i dont think ppl rly stop and think much abt how objectively horrifying this shit is from teucers long term pov 😭 in the best way obviously given its fiction like its so scrumptiously awful and dysfunctional .
(& just in general man im just so obsessed with the way ajax 14 basically broke the eggshell of his past life and emerged to rise towards his destiny drowned in the guts and gore of the place and people and community he once called home unconditionally. Bro he fucked that town UP and now his family relations will never ever be the same its so fucking Delicious. those 3 days missing and what followed are just Actually a literal fucking horror movie when you stop blindly stanning our ginger menace, forget ajax' side and take the pov of his family and morepesok in general Why Are People Not Talking About This)
like. its not that i dont understand Why this is sth childe ended up doing as i said Thats The Point. its human. teucer is the only one in the family who wasnt there during that fateful 3 days/months . Like yea anthon and tonia were prolly sheltered from most of the carnage back then too but they still Know where he was sent when he became literally uncontrollable and almost killed the neighbors (everybody & their mom loves demonizing his parents as if his demon spawn ass left them a fucking choice JFEJSJSJSKDKS) . like its at least Known.
but then theres teucer.
And like. teucers the Only one with whom ajax can even pretend to have that delusion (ha) of normalcy and a family that hasnt seen him gaze into the abyss and stare back bloodied and grinning ear to ear . like. hes the only shot childe can have at even playacting some crude imitation of normalcy before Everything and even That comes with an expiration date hes fully aware of. so theres just lies after lies after lies and the fact that even his family just. if not actively partaking in the charade then at least silently allows the entirety of it to happen to teucer whos the Only fucking one out of the loop is just..... dude its not fair on him At All
Misleading teucer THIS much is just. its fucking horrible man but i GET it. thats why its so delicious man i GET it but god its just . imagine being teucer in this situation.... thats his entire fucking World shattered once the truth comes out. Everyone close to him has been lying to him his entire time. They all knew and they let him be misled. Like sure he might be happier Now with ajax dutifully protecting that childhood dream of his but after that. Just. sit on this for a bit. after everything do we Really think teucers just going to understand why it came to be and see it as worth it???? Will he really????
yet at the same time as awfully cruel it all is its just So human!!!!! Its so human of both ajax and his family to use the innocence of the only child that was spared the aftermath of worlds best/worst 3 month abyss training camp to indulge in this flawed false reality where their third son didnt walk into the void and come back hungry for More until only the fatui could take him and even then it only spurred him on further on that path. Like its all an act and a lie and its just. Not fucking fair on teucer but hes still doing it and theyre letting him even tho they Know it wont last theyre all looking teucer in the eye every day and letting him believe like man....
like in both the entire ruin factory sequence And in general hiding the truth from teucer as extensively as childe does hes being incredibly selfish but at the same time its selfishness only rly in the way all people are when it comes to Wanting to be seen a certain way by the ones they love and care about. and thats what makes it so interesting. bc as much as the choices he makes are dubious (or like. this decision makes sense to him. a morally bisexual total omnivore ethics-wise narwhalpilled since 14 who sees exclusively in abyss shrimp colors and acts accordingly) both they and the motivations behind them are also just. So very human ones . as terrible as the implications and eventual inevitable downfall of those choices can (will) be.
like. is it not that much more fascinating to consider all the ways that childe is neither a particularly exemplary nor an egregiously bad brother just one that. Happens to be wired weird in the head and proud and flawed and with a track record of heavily suspect decision-making but that also very much genuinely loves his family man. Like i can love that about him without dismissing the fact that theres parts to how hes treating teucer that 100% can and imo rly should backfire horrifically bc. It really just is that fucked up
hes not a good brother hes Worse AMD better than that and also not alone in this like. his family is an active fucking part of this . But like still . Is he trying his best with his abyss shrimp colored vision ? Yes. Is his love genuine? Absolutely. What are the marks? 3/10 meet me in the office after class mister youre just actually horrible (affectionate) 😭
A perfect brother? Not My Ajax man 🗣🗣 and like theres SO MUCH to explore in that it makes me so sad you just. Never see any of it p much in fanworks bc we all just call him best bro and whatever and thats that like its so sad. this family is terrible horrible awful and no good and they deserve it but also didnt deserve it it was misfortune it was fate it was inevitable . justice for teucer man i need to get him in therapy asap
#tonia will call him a perfect brother and ppl take it at face value is so.#dude NOBODY in that fuckimg family is in the place to say jack shit abt whats healthy familial dynamics n whats not#now like. do i know that theyll most likely never Truly let ajax experience teucers righteous rage at the betrayal#and instead brush it off where hes like youre still my brother i love u#Yes. unfortunately. but god he doesnt fucking deserve any of that like he SHOULD lose teucer forever#teucer should go full scorched earth no contact the entire family like its r/relationship_advice addressing mild drama#and theyd all deserve it. even as i understand Why they did this.and sympathize with it .#this is why he and the narwhal deserve each other btw hes just kimda fucking terrible sometimes#yes i had to make this about them too#genshin#rambles#childeposting
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combining 2 old drawings to create a new better drawing. they r so cute
(old)
#its funny bc sometimes im like “yea i have a pretty consistent artstyle. i dont think its changed much”#and like#thats true#but whenever i look at my old art im like WOW what the FUCK IS THAT#every time ppl reblog my old art i contemplate death#i shouldnt have used up my good ideas so early on. i shouldve waited until i was at least a little better#Oh well#god knows ill be saying this about my current art too in a years time#nat rambles#would be so fucking funny if i redrew some of my old m!ntmg art but womanified it#i wont do that bc id feel bad for the men likers out there but its funny to think about
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everytime i get a lotta few new followers i get anxious about it and it makes my stomach hurt to check the Count but little psa bc i have no pinned i do block minors and racists and transmeds etc etc and This is my main blog thing i don’t know where i was going with this but i just wanted to say that uhhhhhh uhhhh THIS is an edit; temporary pinned bc i’ve blocked like three people today idk if it’ll help but UGH
#when i was. smallerish#i used to be better at following people back i have a lot of people that i think i’m mutuals with and then i’ll check and it’ll just be lik#Someones name i remember becayse i see it a lot#sorry ramble ramble ramble ramble#i think it’s just like Numbers plus Eyes on Me that make me anxious god that sounds kind of Self Important maybe idk but#like i’ve never gotten the level of attebtion on my art that i do here so it’s a little scary sometimes i’m justsheepish in general about i
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neuvi is meeting his peepaw rn
#genshin impact#caluutalks#4.6 spoilers#genshin spoilers#so...... arlecchino's story huh...#god she's so cool and complex and interesting and I LOVE HER STORY QUEST#def one of (if not) the best atm. her bossfight is so cool. I'll ramble more abt her later when i post art of her (i swear im finishing it)#back to scylla n neuvi#so. yeah. we got confirmation that scylla's the prev hydro dragon. ain't that cool. [refer to edit at the bottom]#also i read on the hoyo web prior to 4.6 that he's gonna function as our remurian taxi and i was vv excited for scylla every since#bc it tickles me SO MUCH that the previous hydro dragon that we're gonna meet soon IS GOING TO BE OUR PERSONAL TAXI#also like at the end of the quest we're buddy buddy with him and calling him big guy. I fucking love that. we besties fr#plus scylla did say that he plans to meet neuvillette sometime after the events of the quest so..#so I might be drawing that too for funsies.#anw i'll be doing exploration and later finish the arlecchino art. cya my dear fellows!#edit: apparently I misread and it seems like scylla isn't the prev hydro dragon?? and that he's a powerful vishap (smth of the sort).#either way I'm still probs gonna draw the idea of neuvi and scylla meeting but ig somethings will change.#either way. sorry for the confusion folks.
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Screaming and kicking my feet because I got to kiss a made up skeleton in a make belief scenario
#raccoons rambles#i love him your honor#i simp over nightmare and edge the most#but baggs?#feels like he's literally got my soul in his clutches sometimes#spoilers!#i think chapter 6 of TNA is gonna be solely focused on him sooo...#gotta do some character development before Nightmare gets to terrorize Aylin again#wait not terrorize...#apologize...#he doesn't wanna right now though#gods don't apologize or something stupid like that
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Maybe writing emotionally disgusting fic about Maizur.u and T.oshiro will save me
Do we even comprehend what it must be like to live in a household with a father that's charming to outsiders but somewhat egocentric and emotionally distant within the household wall's, a mother that mentally checked out, and to be raised by a nanny who both was the adult that loved you the most but also "disciplined" all the unseemly things out of your personality. Oh and the nanny is officially the other woman.
Something about growing up and your eyes slowly open to what your parents are like, beyond what they try to project to you, and noticing all the ways in which the adults of your family don't respect someone else in the household, the désillusion, realising that you have no role models who didn't hurt you and that's now up to you to decide the type of adult that you'll be,
Always feeling guilty and entitled by being affected by the dynamics between the adults in your life, like you've got any right to comment on it, like they aren't adults at liberty to live their life as they please, you're too old to be affected* by it anyway, you are the eldest too so get it together
#ahhh you could fit so many unresolved issues in this man#so tragic that i find him relatable lol yikes. genuinely his family situation sometimes strikes me as dark humoured.#but then i remember what being er. kinda so-so in a similar situation for a while felt like and I feel nauseous lol yikes#i see Toshiro doing a lot of self-censorship when it comes to his feelings too. god forbid he admits he felt uncomfortable by something he#rationalizes at not really being his business like for example: if my dad wants to cheat and my mom won't do anything about it what right d#i have to resent my parents let alone the other woman who's nice to me too like. that's their life what exactly is he entitled to here?#anyway my man Toshiro genuinely get out of there. take your siblings and run.#rambles#i also see it from Maizuru's pov yknow but alas. I relate to Toshiro 🙃
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religious trauma lifesteal!zam essay //lifesteal spoilers
call it projecting but like imagine the amount of religious trauma lifesteal!princezam has (presuming theres some sort of connection of the characters between seasons) like bro has had like 80% of his teamates become gods and watched them loose their sense of self in one way or another he himself started exploiting at one point then goes on to ban himself in season five theres something to be said their having reached the heart cap and having so much power after hours and hours of constant labour to achieve what he got handed to him by a divine like entity like just to ban himself something something sacirficing your life to a higher entity . something also about watching all of his loved ones betray him die or him having to betray them for his own self of moral justice which is very lackluster to his constantly changing beliefs and morality he will never find something that he can cling to (like religion) so. yeah.
#lifesteal princezam#princezam#character analysis(?)#princezam religious trauma.#ALSO uhmmm... something something veryqueercodedpurpletriohewasapartofinseasonfour#watching both of them become a more divine entity via exploits and watching both of them hide from him#just for him to betray them and then join back with what he first left eclipse fedeartion for...?#ya#i hope this helps Understand why people hc him with reliigous trauma or Whatevs. maybe thats justm.e l. no actually ive seen a lot of peopl#do this . also him telling jumper that shes just like him in earlier seasons DOES kinda apply that theres someee theme of the same person#throughout seasons but like whatever it can also just be my own personal headcannon i am More then okay with that.#i h ave so much to say#the facct that hes literally apart of devotion duo.. devoting yourself to another person to the point where you will betray your own#mortality for them can be Pretty Traumatizing#this is also just my silly little rambles and why i think of him w some form of religious trauma sometimes <3 <3 <3 <3#btw when i say religious trauma i mean trauma formed by somethihng resembling religion. and in lifesteals case i think what most closely#would be akin to a religion is to devote yourself to something much more powerful then you (exploiters#which are just the equivelant of gods in my opinion due to practicaly endless levels compared to others (like dupeing#just having.everything. already places yourself in something which is Above a human or in this case players.
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Still can't draw but I've been thinking about when people put their own little twist on a character's design. Make up and add their own little things. It genuinely makes me very happy
#zoc scrambled#zoc shack#LANDS_EDGE#zoc artwork#rain world#rw oc#rw iterator#I'm ninety-nine percent certain I rambled about this at some point#how fandoms will show their own spin on a character's design#I love that#AND SOMETIMES?? people do it to ? my guys?#and I get so so happy#you are not bound by my silly little reference just know that#especially for creativity#as long as he's recognizable go the fuck wild#God knows I give him ten million different designs#gotta satiate my friends who like simple designs but I gotta give into the urges to let him be complex sometimes (cause I love complex desi#ns)#sorry I'm in a sappy mood#still sick#I want to draw so badly#properly
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I’ve been really thinking of reopening my art shop soon… I’ve been taking some practice doodles (hence all the posting lately) while I shake off my rust and I’m finding things I enjoy working on again. I miss trying my hand at more dragons/OCs and colors. my shop’s so broken rn lmao but that’s a problem for a later date it’s just nice getting back into art
#my mental health is starting to improve a bit#took a couple years but I found some meds that finally work better for me#ofc things aren’t 100% but I was really in a pit for a while#like ‘did not leave my house in months and slept 14 hours a day’ kind of pit#so. any improvement is better lol. but nah I’ve been making real improvement and im doing better. a lil shaky sometimes but that’s expected#diagnosed with chronic fatigue too. which is unfortunate but not unexpected. i am indeed god’s sleepiest soldier#i feel like a raisin slowly rehydrating but considering i was in a desert before any hydration is welcome#just learning how to enjoy things again overall#one thing I just couldn’t get myself to do (and enjoy) was art. doodles here and there but nothing to post#and it’s kind of funny because I feel like that downtime actually gave me a chance to think about what I wanted to work on#even when I wasn’t actively practicing#just paying attention to things I guess. enjoying art styles#i genuinely think my experimenting with stained is helping me learn colors#i spend hours in the scryshop im glad it’s paying off lmao#i want to tackle bigger things but i just gotta ease myself into the hang of things again#for now im having fun and that’s coooool. thank you all for your nice comments#i read all tags while kicking my feet and giggling. thank u all#that’s the update on Me tho. more to come hopefully#starting next month/julyish I will have a significant amount of time to dedicate to drawing which i intend on doing#so who knooowwwsss#rambles#funny enough coloring has become my favorite part of the process now. it used to be lineart. now lineart annoys me LOL#i also feel like i kinda lost my ability to write which has been frustrating but im focusing on art first#anyways that’s a whole different tangent rant over
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writing my silly little fic and again im struck with how much opportunities they missed by pretending the s2 stancy breakup wasn't messy, specifically for Nancy's guilt about barb and forcing herself to grow up too fast
like s1 Nancy spends one night being a stupid teenager goofing off at her boyfriend's party and staying over to get spicy while Barb goes home. then she later realizes Barb disappeared and died that one night she was letting go and having fun. this is widely recognized trauma for her and informs a lot if not most of her actions through the rest of the show
in season 2 she's feeling the weight of it more around the first year anniversary. steve trys to help by taking her to a party to forget for a little while and 'be stupid teenagers' for a night. a perfectly set up parallel already
the way the show wants it to go, we get the bullshit argument, they fight, allegedly break up at some point, and nancy sleeps with Jonathan. later steve tells her to go with him and we're supposed to read it as Steve stepping back so jancy can happen. we're supposed to be seeing this as a happy ending.
but with the material we're given this would have been the perfect place for an emotional repeat of season 1 for nancy. she and steve go to the party and pretend to be stupid teenagers for the night. but oh no! nancy lets lose too much, lets herself relax and drink and dance, and the next day her boyfriend's pissed. hes saying she said things she never remembered saying and its hurt him and she doesn't know what to do. and kids around school are talking about them breaking up at the party, and that fits with Steve's anger she saw, so they must've broken up right? it sucks, even if she wasn't in love with him, that'd be the worst way to break up with someone (especially if she's confusing platonic and romantic feelings or convincing herself it has to be romantic when she really just values him as a friend)
and then she doesn't have time to work it out, she needs to go with Jonathan to avenge barbs 'disappearance' to give her family closure. She's got a lot of conspiracy shit to do and its stressful. so when murray starts going off about how she's not really in love with steve, how she actually likes Jonathan and he seems to like her back. they finished a lot of the hard work with the conspiracy stuff, she can let her guard down and have a quick good night.
then the next day is chaos. demodogs and labs and will being possessed. It a rough fucking day. Steve tells her to go with Jonathan while they get the mindflayer out of Will, civil like they're on good terms so she does (and thank god she did because that was rough and they needed all the help they could get)
and then everything's fine again, with the upside down. and it looks like she handled things better this time, was about to relax occasionally and still made it through.
except apparently she and steve didn't break up. he thought it was just a few fights, that they put their shit aside for the apocalypse and now they can work things out.
and it could ruin nancy. a year later and she's still hasn't learned her lesson, that letting her guard down hurts the people she cares about, that relaxing and having fun makes her lose people. its her fault for the messy breakup with Steve and its her fault that barb is gone. she's the reason she's lost friends close to her, 2 for 2, and now she only has Jonathan left (and what do you know, season 3 has her conflict with Jonathan and in season 4 she's not let anyone else get truly close to her and fred still dies)
you see what i mean?? by having conflict magical resolve itself in the background we loose so much powerful, painful character drama for her. our girl who thinks she has to keep the world around her up solely on her shoulders because she can't handle the loss of her best friend in season 1. Nancy who desperately wants to be normal and have people she loves but keeps losing them, through factors both in and out of her control, but feels like everything has to be her fault just because some things were.
and to be fair, that story is still present in the show. its there and definitely compelling, but it could've been even more so. i feel like if maybe there was less 'nancy has to be a strong independent girlboss' in there (abd it's definitely there, they want to make a point of making her a Strong Woman Character so bad) and she was allowed to have mistakes acknowledged by the narrative, this is the direction it would've gone. She could've been an excellent example of well written women who are strong and awesome through their own right instead of the narrative trying to make us like her
#nancy wheeler#stranger things meta#stranger things thoughts#platonic stancy#stranger things#platonic stancy because while this could definitely be used in a jancy breakup then stancy fic#my personal theory is that she thinks she should like him romantically because he sees her like that but she actually likes him as a friend#and the bullshit scene was just the worst way for her to say it because she waited so long and refused to when she was sober#also didn't tag anti-nancy because i don't think it is really? like its anti-canon-depiction-because-i-think-they-did-her-dirty#also this is kinda nancy pov so its not like she's actually at fault for everything but in her mind she blames herself anyway#so yea#the fic is my Steve Henderson AU btw for ppl who've never seen me before#stancys not the focus (its steve pov with the Hendersons being main characters) but i want to do a serious platonic stancy workthrough in i#so this is just my headcanons (technically canon compliant based on what we see on screen but not following the narrative direction y'know)#devon's steve henderson au#steve henderson au rambles#hoping praying to god this doesn't make people angry but if it does feel free to block me i don't mind and i really dont want to argue#no disc horse for me just silly little thoughts and headcanons thanks for understanding#devon thinks sometimes
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guys i'm flipping out i need the wisdom saga NOWWWWWWUSDUUDUDIGK
#epic is genuinely so good for me sensory wise#it's so nice on the ears that it makes me ascend#i am addicted to epic sorry guys#anyway i hope the cast takes their time and doesn't burn themselves out#i literally love this musical so much..#i'm very excited for the next saga#i can't believe there's only like 3 sagas left that's. actually fucking crazy my god#epic the musical#wisdom saga#come to me..#jorge rivera herrans#epic is actually just my favorite musical of all time btw#i've like never heard anything like it#like i genuinely love all the songs(even if i skip them sometimes i still love them)#it's HARD to get me to do that#but epic is so ascension worthy#it genuinely has got me wanting to sing every song as i listen to it it's so good#UGK#oh shit i'm rambling in the tags again whoops
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honestly monster next door is everything i've been begging for for big for YEARS like i don't think you'd understand the importance of this drama to me and probably to big too really like i'm just rambling right now because i can't put it into words probably but big deserves this and i hope this is just the beginning of his success & recognition because it's what he deserves after not being recognised for so long
#lex waffles#i think only really jane can understand how i'm feeling right now#because we've both been wanting this so badly for him#and god is it worth it#<- pun not intended#drama ramblings#like his potential in my mate match that went unrecognised in that shit ass company for so long#having to see him suffer through bad plots & being the third point of the triangle 😭#and god ryu was so important to me as a role like i love him dearly and he's the character that introduced me to big & got me into editing#again but god god is just something else i love him so much#(also side note this is why i say don't judge my favourite dramas on the ones i gif because sometimes i don't gif the dramas i adore)#(tho i do really wanna gif mnd i just haven't yet figured out /what/ to gif)
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something about the whole trope of bad things happen to small child so said child grows up and enters a career dedicating themselves to stopping that from happening to other children make me so fucking happy because yes!! you became the very thing that could've saved you!! it's a form of self love, knowing that you deserved better and vowing to give that to others because you couldn't have given that to yourself!! i love you forever characters in this trope
#yes i am projecting#what about it#i'd like to think that i have some characteristics of a person who could've saved me when i was little#but i think the biggest thing is continuing to live#not survive#LIVE#just doing that#just existing sometimes is enough for kids to realise oh my god#it's ok#i'm ok#rambles#cult rambles
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