#but my brain has a mind of its own
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Just your local fish yao thinking about how to save his master and the tyrant prince wanting to kiss said fish
#greeniegaes#svsss#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#svsss au#shen jiu#watercolor#again woah.#shencest#JiuYuan#shen jiu/shen yuan#scumcum#tdtbpf au#scum villain au#scum villain self saving system#writing ‘sweet sweet fishy essence’ wasn’t on the board of what I do while sick#but my brain has a mind of its own#fish yao Shen yuan
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personal character design headcanons + brainrot
Note: the re-bound!au does NOT belong to me, it belongs to @chipper-smol I’m just not normal about it lol
#I SAY PERSONAL BC ITS MY OWN SPIN ON IT. NOT CHIPPERS CANON UNLESS THEY DECIDE TO OR NOT YOU HEAR ME /LH#I made a banner and everything this time. PLWEASE send them your questions not me JAJFHDSF#I thought it would be cool if macaque has two separate forms as a shadow and inside a mindscape. like I wanted his shadow form to reflect#him in his prime and then the mindscape form as what he looked like when he died. or a more vulnerable state at least#based on LBD appearing to MK as the ivory lady when she died in the S3 special. I don’t know exactly what it was but my first thought seein#the white void was she was appearing to MK in his mindscape to talk to him. so I built on that#I wanted to give him a more ‘Smokey’ look as a shadow just based on how he manipulates them in the show like in shadow play. I hope this#makes it look cool and immaterial. and then his mindscape form would be more battered up and tangible#the last couple images are chippers ideas though since they said the monkeys are drawn to MK when macaque is possessing him lol#and the fact that macaque doesn’t have any senses unless he’s possessing someone + literally sniffing out wukong in the scroll 🤨📸#I also have a vivid image of macaque moving from the mindscape to physical form like umm. kind of like when he passes the boundary between#physical and spirit/mind(?) it’s like the shadow covers him like ink. or pulling Saran Wrap over your face and it clings to your skin#so it kind of makes the shadow seem like a sort of shell or covering.. and I love the idea of MK meeting macaque in the mindscape for the#first time too. like the moment mac rescues him from LBD and MK sees him all battered and tired looking brooooooo#I’m not even sure if that would count as a mindscape but it rattles around in my brain like loose marbles#god I fucking love this au. gives me imagination fuel swear to god#my art#doodles#lmk#Lego Monkie kid#Monkie kid#lmk au#re-bound!au#rebound au#lmk sun wukong#lmk swk#lmk macaque#lmk six eared macaque#lmk mk#lmk xiaotian
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5% of a color headcanon.... two versions since b&w emphasizes the dagger more i think but i still like the warm tones ASFSADA
i am not biased towards rainbow daggers whatsoever i promise (lie)
((also friend is streaming now and im there too!! bit more info linked here, its rated mature tho))
#in stars and time#isat#isat siffrin#i think tumblr is chewing on this ah well#its more of a weapon color headcanon than anything else tbh SAFASDA#but its very funny in my mind to refer to this as#insert percent amount of color headcanon here ASDASFA#i do not have many color headcanons tbh???#overall i would say i have like 1.15(ish) color headcanons that are solid in my brain across the cast???#the rainbow dagger has been in my minds eye for a long time#um SPOILERISH talk ahead in tag talk so be warned#i am serious!! turn back now if u dont want SPOILERS!!!#can u imagine if siffrins parents had lovingly crafted that white cloak and helped him pick out the pure black fit when younger#so they could be fashionably black and white like if things were in color or something#but then the first thing siffrin picks out on their own terms is literally the most colorful thing imaginable for the dagger#i do not know if that makes much sense but yeah#it is fun in my minds eye ASDAFA#actually is it ever mentioned where siffrin got the dagger??#was it also passed down????#ik the cloak was for sure from his family#and the pure black fit underneath is up in the air i think#tho if it was a first pass pick from parents#and he continued to pick it again and again after they got older subconsciously or not might be fun to think about#also do not mind the art style shift it might happen again LMAO#probably sparingly tho? who knows!!!#should i link stream in this post??? i dont know???#i feel a lil bad if it isnt related?????#oh well im doing it anyway because friendship :]#honestly did not think i would also have anything to post today but uh oops sorta just happened and it lined up so ASFASDA#anyway tag talk over stream time WOOO and i think i hit tag limit LMAO
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I can't stop thinking about the Houses in Detective Beebo. This always happens to me, latching onto the main characters? Nah uh. Go to House world instead. I'm stuck in "Haunted House" island, got taken by the waves I can never get out anymore.
The Houses are just sooo good. For me. The formation of the "heart" specially. I keep thinking bout it. For the art gallery, the heart is the map, for the House of Vera it had two hearts until gaining a new one during endings 9 and 10. The first heart it had before being called the House of Vera was a shield, and then it became a grandfather clock.
There's a theme here and the question of "how did the hearts form?" In one of the notes during investigation treasure hunt of House of Vera's history, Dr. Roberto Diaz gave the house a new "purpose" after destroying the shield from grieving his wife's death. He got "fused" with the house, he couldn't tell his feet apart from the floor, he can feel his heartbeat echo in the corridors, the water leak matched with his tears. He became one with the house all while the house gained a new purpose and power, to give him one more chance despite the person he so desperately wanted to live again remained dead. The house gained the power to reset time within the house every 8 pm whenever someone dies, which allowed the doctor to save every patient inside.
Obviously, a House becomes Haunted when given a purpose, much like what the doctor did. But what about the heart? The doctor became one with the house, so during that moment the grandfather clock hasn't been desginated as the "heart" of it yet, since during that moment, the heart is Dr. Diaz himself, he feels everything that happens in the house, like an extension of his body. He hears his own heartbeat in the corridors, the house is his body just as how his body belongs to the house.
But when Dr. Diaz died after visiting his daughter, having succumbed to an illness that should've taken his life years ago, the House still has its purpose, it still needs to live on despite the doctor's death. So maybe, it chose its own heart.
The theme is that each heart is connected to a House's purpose. The art gallery's heart was a map, the purpose given to that house by a struggling artist was meant to be innocent enough, the artist wanted people to look at all their art and never leave. Unfortunately the House took that a bit literally, by making it an endless labyrinth with no exit. The purpose is to have every visitor "see all the art" and what better tool to navigate through the entirety of a gallery to see all the art within it but a map!
I wonder if the artist felt the same way that Dr. Diaz did, being fused with the house, feeling everything happening inside it. Did the artist themself get trapped within their own house? Did they get overwhelmed from the new sensations brought upon being fused with a building meant for multiple people to go in and out of for hours on end? Were they the only one the house allowed to come and go easily? Did they see what became of the people that went inside the art gallery and never came out? Were they filled with guilt upon seeing it?
One thing's for certain is that the art gallery has been abandoned for years, with only a map to serve as its heart. The House of Vera, before being known as that, had a different heart and purpose. Before Dr. Diaz became the owner of it, the house was known to have survived any and all tragedies that came its way, even the earthquakes that happened in the past didn't destroy it. That was because of its first purpose before Dr. Diaz unknowingly changed it, the House's purpose was to be an indestructible shield. Perhaps it was due to the colonial era and the owners needing a strong shelter in such a stressful time, the House was given the purpose to protect everyone inside it.
So its first heart, was a shield, to mirror that purpose. But because Dr. Diaz destroyed that shield, the House lost its purpose Momentarily until it immediately latched onto a new purpose presented by Dr. Diaz himself. The House, whose purpose has always been to protect, in a poetic sense, was given One More Chance to protect others much like how Dr. Diaz was given a chance to save all his patients so long as they're within the House.
And so comes ending 9 and 10. The two endings in which the House's heart gets destroyed yet is given a purpose once more. The new heart, for as long as he lives, is Detective Oliver Beebo. He's incredibly sensitive to the world around him, so the new sensations that came from having fused with the House was Far Too Overwhelming. It's unsure how the other living hearts reacted to that, but from the notes written by Dr. Diaz, he seemed to have gotten used to it enough to keep going as usual.
The new purpose that Oliver gave the house was simple: To keep Ángel alive. And so, for as long as Oliver lives and the House stays, Ángel lives as well. In a sense, immortality is shared between the three of them. The House remains undisturbed, Oliver and Ángel lives. From the three examples with the object hearts that the House's had, it seems that even if Oliver dies, the House will merely look for an object connected to its purpose to serve as its heart, which would allow Ángel to continue living. But I doubt he would want that.
What happens to a House that failed to fulfill its purpose then? What would become to a House whose purpose isn't tied to it, but tied to a person? What would happen to the House of Vera, with its newest purpose, should Ángel die? Will it continue living so long as its heart is beating? Will it look for another person to latch onto as its new purpose? Or will it die for having failed to fulfill the purpose of its existence? The House of Vera has been shown to be a house that craves to protect others, from the shield, to the grandfather clock, and now to Oliver's desire for Ángel to live. What would happen to it then should it fail to protect even a single person?
#ariambles#detective beebo spoilers#ohgod ive gone mad. please look away. tis but ramblings of a person insane about houses#i dont know what im talking bout yall its 6:30 in the morning and i havent slept yet im on my bed thinkin bout houses#the houses in detective beebo has gripped me mind heart and soul. its just soooooo OUOUOGFHGUHHG i LOVE!!! haunted houses like these!!!#LIKE YEEES GURL! BE A LIVING ORGANISM! I LOVE YOU! the house as a living organism with its own anatomy is so MWAH! I LOVE IT!#playing the game anatomy did this to my brain yaaalll im never the same after that. i cant look at houses the same way anymore#and detective beebo is soooOOOOO!!! good for me. the houses!!! THE HOUSES!!! I LOVE THE HOUSES!°°°!!!!
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You know what's REALLY annoying?
I'll start something that I'm really excited about, and I'm into it and doing it, and suddenly my brain will decide, "BORING!" and then I just? Can't do it anymore? No matter how hard I try?
What the fuck, man? I was in the middle of that.
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Whole, watching Heart & Mind panic: <What's going on?>
Soul: {Heart is having a midlife crisis and Mind is just having a crisis.}
#chonny jash#submission#chonnys charming chaos compendium#cj mind#cj heart#cj soul#cj whole#“and you?” {identity crisis} “....aren't you the identity???” {i dont wanna hear it from the guy thats also having all our issues}#“why is part of me having a mid-life crisis? We're not even 25” (dont remind me)#[he does have a pretty mid life lol] (shut the fuck up you antique microwave) [at least a microwave has a purpose unlike SOME people]#“i already hate it here” {welcome to the club} “great. my brain has its own hate club & im already in it”#{four club members in a brain of three is an amazing statistic}
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tw noose
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oh wow look its a jashling!! the before aka Icarus (good job angelo u are so creative)
some notes because i cant sleep:
- hole in chest for "pit."
- heart pupils for "backlit by moonlight"
- kinda made of wax but not really? he melts the worse he gets mentally which makes it hard for him to move, this is for "wings of wax" and "every ounce of energy." (aka the best song in the album... i will fight you on this)
- no wings because... because.
- i wanted to make him look sketchy and not clean...if that makes sense. sort of like dissociation
- grayscale color scheme
- sufferer of the "flat affect" (just like me fr)
- terrible memory. dude does not remember (...just like me fr)
- mostly wears sweatpants, socks, and tshirt cause they are top tier clothing for when you are too tired for anything else (also crocs)(i am a croc defender☝🏽)
#wwph cj mentioned 🫵🏽‼️‼️#anyways#i did these pretty fast and out of nowhere so they will prob change#prob not tho!#im lazy with character design#just look at how i draw mind#very basic#not that its bad i just dont like using my brain apparently#hmm#its almost 5 am#this is my own fault#dont ask how icarus goes back to normal after melting bc idk either#he has a mold in his room thats shaped like him i guess#💀#good night#oh fuck the TAGS#chonny jash#angelo tag#tw noose#tw sui implied
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can i ask.how u guys practice ur creativity <3 how u practice ur imagination or like.. how u experiment with ur art, how u come to ideas and how u develop them.<3 pretty please <3
#smthing i have always struggled w.is feeling like i can only draw things that r handed 2 me.#as in.an idea or concept that already exists#chara or conflict that already exists.Scene that alr exists.#and i think it can be soo limiting bc when i have that sort of creative desire but nothing 2 reflect off of it#i feel like im unable to do anything/get anywhere bc im unable to do that mental legwork myself ykwim#like comic artists r SOOO JAW DROP INSPIRING TO MEE bc not only are u envisioning ur own sequences/situations#but u are able to imagine even the most MUNDANE interactions within those scenarios u know#like the transitory panels and the quiet moments and the every day stillness#and i feel like.its not even a poor attempt on my behalf its like.i cant Even attempt it.like my brain is soo empty#and soo static and noiseless that i am like gauhh......#i can practice lines all day long and practice colors and practice anatomy or Whatever bc its something concrete#and its in front of me and i can pry apart the physical technicalities until i understand it better#but my MIND???ABSTRACTION>? THOUGHTS .ough its so hard#and i really want to push past that but i dont know how and its so .. demoralizing to think that ill get there One Day but i feel#one million and two days away.and not making active process towards it.#i know the first step is to build ur visual library and i feel liek. idk i FEEL LIKEEE theres more 2 it that im missing#but also im depressed as hell n my job is killing my creative drive and the seasonal stuff isnt helping#so maybe i just need 2 give it time (true) but i also like.man i dont know. i want 2 do something w my hands#but everything ive been doing so far has felt soo .hard and fruitless and i definitely dont want 2 turn art into such a stressful thing#fruitless as in like.i dont get any personal satisfaction w it.idgaf abt monetization or algorithms or any of tht#but smtimes thats just what happens and i have 2 weather through and know ill be more equipped 4 this some other time#SAWRYYY IM ALWAYS GOING ON AND ONNN im nromal im normal<3 i just rly like art and it sucks balls whn it feels out of reach#sigh cry fart scroll.(:salute:)
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(chuckles) Im so good at reading comprehension and my meat is huge
#porter's lines in the preview..... I am prepared to be correct. and so so smug#cannot believe they touched upon clone politics as well. just. absolutely insane ep#fhjy spoilers#actually Im returning here to bask in what might be with the preview. this place sucks why do you save it?#that question is always so Integral to my writing brain its like being struck with lightning seeing that worded#why do you hold onto the coherence that you do? at what point do you abandon your morals?#why do you save the world? why do you do it again and again?#but very specifically with the bad kids I think itd both hit hard for them to hear it said out loud#that like. yeah! actually none of it ever has to be this way does it. all of it is started by someone and maintained by someone#you can shift the world. this fucking weirdo we're fighting is doing it right now! the door exists!#but also like 5 out of 6 of them would immediately be like fuck OFF my PARENTS LIVE HERE#and also specifically fig and gorgug would kill porter no matter what he says bc they just hate him#and it owns. this bitch should learn the consequences of working with teenagers#also I think shooting those cannons is like the closest riz has ever gotten to a moment of mindfulness#kid was doing self searching n introspection on top of those guns. eugenia got there at the breakthrough#I believe in you baby boy. rob a bank get that tuition the world is your oyster
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I have not posted any of my analysis to reddit yet and I think I might just post it and ghost it. I've already spent too much time looking at other people's threads on there to feel any way good about interacting with folks.
I already went in an added the "I know you're going to bring this up let me save you the time" section which is exclusively touching on the frequent topics of:
"well what about the fingerprint nostrum and finger mimics? He is clearly just a crackpot"
And
"it's definitely some weird elaborate sacrifice to Metyr thing"
#if he's drinking hallucinogenic tea in his free time genuinely good for him. whatever man. i just do not think either of those items are-#at all relevant to the quest especially the nostrum because it is a placebo medicine and aint nothing fake about this shit#also i think theres a distinction between becoming fingers vs wanting to replace metyr? idk like as ive said i think he thinks he's-#better than the fingerweavers and rightfully so#like please come to a new conclusion other than “man this guy is on drugs”#also girl... metyr doesnt need sacrifices. like? where is that textually or in set design? metyr wants us to leave her the fuck alone#she's minding her own business EVERY TIME WE SPAWN INTO HER ZONE#like why are people so desperate for everything to have a dark undercurrent? not everything has to be some dark disney ass shit#“actually finding nemo is a hallucination & Marlin is insane & nemo is dead that movie is actually super fucked up & dory is a grim reaper”#like im sorry but this is how this extra shit all feels to me#like it is already fucked up and miserable?#is he 100% a good person? like thats genuinely person to person. theres personal gain from the quest#and hes definitely very good at getting what he wants#manipulate manifest mother#tail fingers on the vision board#devon yaps#and yap I did#like I don't want to be a bitch because yeah we should genuinely celebrate other peoples theories and hcs in these games#but i dont think “lol this guy is just on drugs” is one of those things#because i like spooky theories if theyre backed up.#but to say “its this weirdly horrible thing and youre all wrong” especially in his context is not great to me#Sorry. like may my own arrogance strike me down like the scholar i think i am 😤 farewell#because again its coming down to meeting this narrative without preconceived bias and most of the reddit stuff feels like-#“he is fucked up. won't say why. but i bet you know why i actually think this 🤫🤫🤫” like just you cant wrap your brain around guy mom#i do really want to reiterate this is about reddit shit. like i am so into people who love his character but interpret him more sinister💕😚#truly eating that shit up
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Thinking about time travel and all the secrets Lu Guang is keeping. And how long he's been keeping them.
And also what his limitations are... because I don't think he knows as much as he thinks he knows.
I've got a lot of thoughts and a lot of questions. I tried to organize them in the hopes to maybe work out some ideas, but it got a bit... Much. Weigh in if you have thoughts because...I'm clearly vibrating in place wanting to talk about this. But anyway, here we go.
How is the present affected by future dives into the past? (Alternate timelines or pre-determined track)
This section is basically me asking a lot of questions that might just be writing holes or maybe not and we just don't find out for, like, 6 years. And that's fine. I'm here for it, I just need to sort out all these theories in my head.
In S1E9, LG looks into the surveillance photo and sees CXS on the solo dive. Is this because CXS was currently in the photo? Is it because CXS had already done the solo dive and so LG was seeing the affected photo? Is it because CXS was always going to go into the photo, so LG saw the past that always was going to be?
When Liu Min called from Xu Shanshan's phone, was it because CXS was always going to set up the meeting? What if CXS hadn't come to that conclusion and didn't reveal himself in Shanshan's body? Would the call have never happened? Does Lu Guang allow this huge "deviation" because he saw it was supposed to happen? Did he lie about what he saw in the photo? Was his elevated concern in that moment he claimed was about CXS's potential mental state while of going into his friend's potentially dying body actually about CXS starting the game? Is he just as clueless as everyone else and now everything is spiralling?
Chen Xiao. Chen Xiao, Chen Xiao. Oh man. "Nothing will be affected" my ass Lu Guang. Pretty sure you created an entire person that didn't previously exist from that mission. Sure, all the people that were supposed to die in the earthquake died, but Chen Xiao did NOT have a wedding ring on when he came to the photoshop to hire them. He was a miserable man with regrets he couldn't move past, including missing his "first love." Now, I get that first loves have a lot of weight, but he's like 30+ and so desperate... this is not a man who looks at his wedding ring with care and sings his son to sleep. But he becomes that. Where did that child come from?!?
Just because the 12 hours after the photo are the same doesn't mean that the 12 years after it are. Lingering resentment--or the lack thereof-- is a strong shaping force. Also. Chen Xiao's lack of regrets from a successful mission means that he never would have hired them to dive in the first place. So to make it full circle, Chen Xiao "returns" to the photo shop (for the first time?) to have CXS develop the photos he took himself on the camera he saved from the wreckage...And, I have to assume from the implication of a new timeline, THAT is how they get paid for the job. How much are they charging to develop film? Was it worth it??
Does LG even know about this kind of change? Is it just too far out of his range to see? He didn't seem to know about Emma until he saw the news, so maybe he's limited in what he can see, but he found that article pretty fast, so maybe he knew something was happening. It's hard to know.
What are the extent of LG's powers? Is he from the future?
He always says not to ask about the "past or future." I assumed this meant the future of the past that CXS was currently in, but what if he also means the future of the present that we're currently seeing? Can he see the future of the present he's in now?
In season 1, he knew that CXS would appear as himself when he dove into the surveillance camera footage. How? It was obviously CXS's first time doing that, but maybe not LG's. If it was his first time, how did he know?
We recently learned that he can see the present through surveillance footage the same way he does looking at footage of the past. Does this mean he can also see 12 hours into the future? It's 20:44 when LG unlocks Chen Bin's phone, so it's probably around 21:00 when he uses his powers. Does he know how things will unfold? Does he see the twins moving through the building? Does he realize there are two of them?
He's obviously been up to something this whole season: watching the clock, hiding photos, opening up stitches without much physical effort beyond using his powers... 🤔
My current crack theory is that LG reopening his stitches while using his powers to watch the fight is actually related to him escaping and/or jumping off the boat to free CXS. I'm not sure how because it's definitely more than 12 hours between the events, but something is up.
It's not surprising to me that CXS and Wang Juan were controlled through touch. The moment Li Tianxi reached out her hand to shake CXS's I yelled at my TV. It looked too similar to LG reaching out to start a dive.
And I yelled even louder when she made contact
CXS can dive on his own and LG can see into a photo on his own. The physical touch only connects their minds, it's not necessary to activate the powers. Could LG touch CXS and communicate telepathically without diving into a photo if they had an activation touch? Does LJ need a time travel element to get into CXS's head?
I think Li Tianchen's powers at least are touch related because when he touched Xixi, CXS lost his connection with LG. But I think there may be something else going on with the twins. I'm just not sure what I think yet. We wouldn't know if one was possessing the other because their eyes are the same.
How do the powers manifest, and what does that mean for Lu Guang's backstory?
I think we saw the moment when Li Tianxi and/or Li Tianchen acquire powers. Was it a predisposition that unlocked during a highly traumatic moment or did it just manifest somehow from an extreme desire to take control of the situation?
Li Tianxi was a child who wanted to communicate and be present but felt trapped in her over stimulated body. Li Tianchen was a boy with strong ideals and a sense of protectiveness... without the strength of an adult body to follow through with that protection. While they were holding the photo, huddled together in close physical contact after Tianchen's head injury, one of them or the combined force of them was able to 1.) take over their mother's body and 2.) blank out Xixi's mind to the point of cutting CXS's connection with LG and eventually the whole photo. But something went very wrong along the way. Maybe some signals were crossed.
CXS is a highly empathetic person. He feels so much for everyone and wants to connect with people emotionally. And his powers reflect that. We know CXS has probably at some point had a strong enough desire to go back in time, if anything to see his parents.
What, then, do the circumstances look like for a logical, emotionally reserved--but deeply caring--person to acquire powers to see snapshots of the past? What would drive him to want to change the past so much that he manifests these powers?
We know CXS had never done a dive without LG before he temporarily went rogue in S1E9... because he didn't know he could do it until he tried.
We know S1E1 isn't the first time they dive. CXS nags LG about having heard the rules a hyperbolic amount of times. So the powers aren't new at this point. But I don't think they both had powers before they met. So how and when did they get their powers? Was it when they met? When they travelled abroad? After some accident or something?
LG just shows up in CXS's life unannounced. Twice. And that's how they got close. Was it just the random fated meeting of soulmates as per fiction standards or did LG intentionally seek out CXS for more timey-wimey reasons? Did meeting LG activate CXS's powers? Did they experience something together to have compatible abilities? Did LG already have his and teach CXS how to manifest his own? How much did LG already know before he picked up that basketball?
I have this other crack theory that I absolutely hate and don't want to be true at all and almost certainly isn't, but, like...what if if LG and CXS are actually the same person from different timelines. Like LG is a version of CXS that doesn't get to have familial love and maybe experiences too much trauma, and he goes back in time to give himself some semblance of a home and a set of rules to hone his powers without altering the timeline that he's actively changing. They're intentionally written to be two halves of a whole, and there's been more than one joke made about LG being a ghost or not existing. I hate it. But it's in my head.
One last question for today... because I have to wonder:
Who makes the rules?
Has LG just read enough books to feel knowledgeable about how time travel works? Is he from the future trying to maintain a desired outcome? Are they following the rules of a third party who's orchestrating the flow of events from a distance? Are they... Leaving their fates to the ones who aren't in control?
#link click#shiguang dailiren#This is obnoxiously long but I'm not sorry. I ask too many speculative questions and don't answer any of them. This is my brain right now.#It's not my fault that Lu Guang has too many secrets and time travel writing can kinda set its own rules#Send help#Also just assume that any theories I posit are all heavily influenced by my brain reading Shiguang as cannon rather than just a ship.#Because it is. It's literally the title of the show. Can't change my mind. But I'm very impressionable when it comes to other theories so..#Tell me about your thoughts so I can mitigate my own
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Post that has rerouted my brain
#this is legitimately so world changing for me because never before in my whole like 2 years of undyne obsession Ive really just stuck to-#-my own observations about her character. but OML.#after reading this. for the very first time ive had this absolutely mind crushing moment where someone else has made an insanely correct-#observation about her and her character and just all these little things that are lightly implied THAT I SOMEHOW DIDNT NOTICE BEFORE!!!!!!#AND WHEN I SAY THIS HAS CHANGED ME. THIS PERSON WHO POSTED THIS. THIS PERSON THEY ARE SO CORRECT OMG#AND I JUST#DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY CONNECTIONS THIS HAS JUST MADE IN MY MIND. THE SUDDENLY MAKING SENSE OF EVERYTHING THAT I AM EXPERIENCING.#YOU DO NOT EVEN KNOW OH MY GOD#this isnt even just a ''im begging you to read this post i found its rlly good''#its a ''THIS POST I FOUND MAKES AN INCREDIBLY CORRECT POINT THAT I SOMEHOW NEVER MADE BEFORE AND MY BRAIN HAS BEEN CHANGED FOREVER NOW.''#THIS IS. THIS IS SO#its just really a lot to me to see someone who originally didn't really think much into undyne really#but there by making one small crucial observation here it has just blown my world of this character and just who she is etc etc efce ceecceg#i honestly cant even believe i never even picked up on this until literally just now while just searching undyne on google-#-because of how much i needed to see something new of her#AND DID I!!!!!!!!!#that is insane to me how did i never even see this this is changing my everything i am so in love with this post#undyne appreciation my absolute fucking beloved#undyne#undertale#undyne undertale#hdjdjdkskskaaass omgggg hdhdjdndnddn guyss you don't even know#this might not even seem like a lot but it has just opened up so much for me i promise I'll make it all make more sense one day trust me ily
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hi. for people who saw gatsby: an american myth. do you remember mckee asking nick for lunch. and then gatsby in like the next scene inviting nick for lunch. because i remember.
#not pjo#chitter chatter#when gatsby was like 'we should do lunch' i was like. hello. fucking. hello. are we. hello.#gatsby really said we just met literally 5 minutes ago. come meet my father figure. normal normal thing to do jay.#to be clear gatsby also asks him to go to lunch in the book. but like. there's a time skip. and also#in the show after mckee asks they immediately start making out on the couch. none of this ... nonsense#so the vibes are a LITTLE different in my brain.#i saw a few people say they didnt think gatsby and nick flirted enough and like while i do think that think part of it is we're#in nick's pov but not his HEAD#he DOES start singing about gatsby's smile for no reason until jordon is like. alright buddy. lets talk about daisy.#like nick was just Doing That. pull it together carraway.#but i got the vibe (JUST my take) that gatsby was like. kinda into nick. zero reason to be leaning into his space like that sir.#however when he actually MET daisy again he became kinda singularly focused on her again#i mean he built his whole lifeup to this moment#he says it at the end. he murdered pieces of himself to bring himself here. for DAISY.#him snapping back to daisy mode makes sense to me but he still reaches out for nick as a comfort in the sense that hes like#nick do NOT leave please stay with us. daisy does the same. and ofc part is that theyre really. fucking awkward. but like.#LET ME HAVE MY OWN NONSENSE INTERPRETATIONS. HES TRAPPED BY WHITENESS AND CLASS AND HETEROSEXUALITY.#hes already so much of an outsider trying to fit in. (i also think he loves daisy or an ideal at least. and she's EASIER to love. safer.)#nick inherently has more freedom even as a gay man in the sense that hes richer and white and an ivy league dude i mean you understand righ#right????????#even if its in the book i do wanna point out the parallels between those moments. im choosing to see it as deeply intentional <3#this show had a lot of repetition and parallels (see daisy and myrtle in a lot of songs and scenes)#(one i LOVE is tom giving myrtle a necklace and daisy later giving TOM her necklace in case he sees anyone he knows. idk love that shit)#im...gonna queue this#im embarrassed to talk about this show so much. so. into the queue it goes!!!#all the worlds a stage#so like. anyway. thats where i think nick's mind immediately went when gastsby asked him for lunch. personal headcanon <3#gatsby after one convo: we're doing lunch // me and nick immediately: oh ok! guess that's a date then!
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#uh oh i am#feeling very much not like a real person today#just incredibly anxious for no reason i know of#like my body's still in hyper go mode but i mean#this is my first day off in 5 days so maybe thats in?#like i cant convince myself to relax or that i dont have something im pressed for time to do#and im just so tired#and its creating this weird space where i feel Iike im existing a little to the left of reality#the wind is warm and the sky outside is an expanse of blue with crested clouds but i cant take it in#attention span is all over the place#going from like sad to happy to The Longing to feeling left out of my own life#what the fuck brain can i just have#one normal day when im at home BLEASE#i wanted to write today! but even when im sitting still its like im floating#caspost#tbd#sorry i don't mean to complain i feel like ive been doing that alot lately#i am the captain of the struggle bus and its careening into traffic#my mind has the mouth feel of pop rocks and the look of tv static
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the hunger strike is working 😭😭😭 my internet is back on
#I don’t have an apology yet but I think if I hold out I’ll get one lmao!!!#she turned the internet back on and didn’t even tell me she reached out to my dad (who is at work) to be like does dora know I turned it on#we are playing mind games with each other and my poor father is in the middle lmao#anyway I feel like if I hold out I just might get my apology. or as close to an apology as I’m likely to get considering#my mom knows she’s in the wrong she just won’t admit it#the situation is so complicated like my mom is not usually like this but tiktok and facebook reels got to her#when she was at her most vulnerable and. yeah#tiktok and facebook my ENEMY I do not recognize that woman now they have rotted her brain#so has evangelical christianity but that’s a whole other thing all on its own#also to be clear. it’s not a real hunger strike. I am just not coming out of my room. I have things to eat here I promise#im just not telling my family that lmao#delete later
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I was going to write this in the tags of your last post but i think it's important actually so I'm gonna send an ask
On a more serious note I'm actually kind of obsessed with psychoanalyzing Zoro specifically. Because he actually has some pretty big issues I think, mentally
He takes his self appointed job as protector of the crew very very seriously, and he's really hard on himself if he thinks he's failed in any way. I mean just look at him right after Little Garden, or how mad he is after losing his shadow on Thriller Bark.
So yeah there's nothing in that brain but swords and I fucking love that about him, he sure is sharpening them to an unhealthy degree isn't he. He's never strong enough, after all, to protect everyone.
I just,, really like combining silly ideas with serious ones, it's fun
GOD listen is 12:25 am but I just couldnt go to bed without at least STARTING to jot down my thoughts on this but like YEAH. for SURE. Zoro for all that he’s shown to be a pretty simple guy with a single-minded focus, has a LOT to chew on in terms of character depth and layers. There’s lots of fun contradictions to him too. He’s prideful and self-assured but also so often self-punishing, and he’s also someone who is fiercely independent and a free spirit, while having a habit of building his own identity around others (both his dreams are shared with others, they belong other people as much as they do to him and that’s a LOT to think about).
You may have actually caught me red handed here cause that ‘Journey to the Center of the Mind’ story concept maaaay be kind of something i’ve played around with for months now. I think I once tried to write out like a basic premise, but the only thing I really remember is is wanting Luffy to be the primary person to undergo the journey cause. if every Strawhat was present it’d feel less intimate, less personal, and I feel like Luffy would want to explore Zoro’s mind alone to preserve his privacy. Unaware that he’s the person Zoro has the most to hide from. I think the levels of Zoro’s willingness to put the Strawhat’s well being first has the potential to truly frighten him, if the visuals Zoro’s mind provides him are right.
#The idea I had written down is a little embarrassing to talk about too in depth tho dkfjd its silly#It’s a very vague rough draft at best and I dont have a lot of practice in writing. It’d definitely be too ambitious in execution for me#I just remember being very excited to use the wisteria symbol throughout the story… since Oda said it was like ‘his’ plant#I thought that maybe the reason Zoro was put into a situation where he NEEDED to be saved from his own mind could be#smth very mysterical and magical some unexplainable grandline phenomenon#I pictured a big wisteria tree that preys on human’s will#Zoro would lay down to nap under its shade unknowingly and it would quickly plant its roots right into his brain.#and slowly make it so he feels more and more emotionally fatigued until he can’t even bring himself to wake up#He’d have to be reinvigorated somehow#and maybe at first Luffy would think that the way to do that is by reminding him that he has to fight for the crew and his dream#(which is a reasonable assumption as that usually works)#and later realize that maybe what Zoro needs to be reminded of is that he needs to fight for HIMSELF.#Something that he hasn’t 100% done since he promised to Kuina their dream would be shared#ANYWHO. ITS ABOUT TO BE 1 AM NOW#I am not a night owl!!! Sorry for any typos and for the longass tags skfjsk#my post#ask#💚
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