#but like. they could've at least told me that???

[thepixelelf]

neurosurgeon wonwoo x reader x neurologist jihoon warnings: hospital stuff in general. an unnamed child patient in a life-or-death situation. I know how hospitals work even less than I know how frats work. wc: 914

love triangle au requests

[the quiet ones] "He's frozen," you tell Jihoon, eyes set on the operating table and the man at the head of it.

Jihoon lifts his eyes from the monitors to peer through the observation window. Wonwoo isn't exactly frozen like you said, but Jihoon can see the hesitation laced in his fingers. "He can't be."

"He doesn't work on children anymore. Hasn't since..."

When you trail off, an eyebrow rises behind Jihoon's hair. "He told you that?"

"He didn't mean to," you say with a sideways glance. Jihoon can tell he's not supposed to know this about the head surgeon in the operating room, but clearly, the situation is dire. "The assistants in there don't know the procedure like we do, Jihoon."

You both watch Wonwoo as he pauses again. His assistants all look up at him for direction, but he says nothing.

"I have to go in."

Jihoon stops himself from shaking his head. "Spark, you just clocked out after your ninth hour. Plus, you were the one who told me Wonwoo could do this. "

"He can, just--" You clench your fist and stop yourself from arguing. Now is not the time. "Let me take over."

Jihoon looks at Wonwoo again. You must be a prophet -- now, Wonwoo is truly frozen.

"Go," Jihoon orders.

You don't look back.

=

Wonwoo thought he was the only one who knew the emergency alarm connected to the escape stairs was broken. Evidently not, when the sound of the crash-bar doors swinging shut echoes off the concrete stairs. Even though Wonwoo can't see it from his position on the cold floor -- his knees halfway bent to his chest and his head ducked behind his arms -- he hears someone sit down next to him.

"Shouldn't you be overseeing someone?" Wonwoo mumbles.

Jihoon doesn't say anything for a few seconds. Then, he sighs. "Not sure if you've been keeping track, but it's been two hours. Spark is taking a well-deserved nap." His knee bounces in a rapid rhythm. "At least, they'd better be."

Lifting his head, Wonwoo looks at the way Jihoon glares down the stairway. His concern for you reads on his face like irritation, an expression he's seen on Jihoon more and more as of late.

He calls you Spark, and he's called you that for as long as Wonwoo's known either of you. It piqued his curiosity when he first heard it, but he's yet to find out what it means. He's never felt close enough to ask.

Stretching his legs out, Jihoon clears his throat. "The operation was a success -- not that you asked."

"No thanks to me, either," Wonwoo mutters bitterly, dropping his head again. That little girl's smile as Jihoon had walked her through the procedure yesterday shines on the inner sides of his eyelids. "I could've killed her."

"You didn't."

"Only because you replaced me with a real surgeon."

"Jeon." Jihoon's voice beckons Wonwoo to look up at him. "You're confusing real with perfect. There's no perfect surgeon, as much as people pressure you to be one. Real surgeons get tired. Real surgeons have problems. Real surgeons freeze."

Wonwoo curls his lips between his teeth. If he didn't, he wouldn't be able to stop them from shaking. He takes a breath. "They didn't."

You finished the operation Wonwoo couldn't even start.

"Sure, just keep convincing yourself that you're the world's worst fuckup. Keep telling yourself that every other doctor here is perfect and this one mistake makes you inferior. Keep thinking all of us are real while you just -- hell -- faked your way through medical school and six years of surgeries that went just fine. Yeah, that makes sense." Jihoon runs a hand through his cropped black hair. He meets Wonwoo's eyes. "Sounds stupid when I say it out loud, right? I'm not gonna bother pulling you out if you just keep digging yourself deeper."

Wonwoo shakes his head, even though he doesn't know what he's saying no to.

Jihoon lets out another sigh. "But someone will." His knee starts bouncing again. "Spark believes in you, you know? Didn't stop believing you could do it even after they took over. They were exhausted, but they still told me where to find you."

You would know, wouldn't you. Wonwoo feels the corners of his mouth begin to press into his cheeks.

"They're stubborn like that," Jihoon muses, eyes unfocused down the stairway, an unconscious smile on his face.

Something settles at the bottom of Wonwoo's stomach. His lips press between his teeth again. "You like them, don't you?"

Jihoon jolts back to the present, his brows furrowing at Wonwoo. "And you?"

"Me?"

"Are you gonna tell me you don't feel anything for them?"

Wonwoo blinks. His mouth opens, then closes. "I... guess not."

"Then that's another thing we have in common," Jihoon says, oddly calm after hearing the closest thing Wonwoo's said to a confession since high school. "Spark's always telling me we'd be friends if we tried. Calls us 'the quiet ones'."

Slowly, Wonwoo tilts his chin. "...I don't know what you're saying."

"Me neither." Jihoon gets to his feet, turns to Wonwoo, and holds out his hand. "I guess-- I can't say you're not good enough for Spark if the two things I know about you we have in common."

Wonwoo takes Jihoon's hand. "Two things?"

After Jihoon hoists Wonwoo off his ass, a shy grin spreads across his lips. "Quiet and in love. Welcome to the club."

[zepskies]

Hi Zep!! I love your writing so much!

How do you think Dean/Beau/ Ben would react to a surprise pregnancy and if the reader was unsure of keeping it?

Hi there! Aw thank you, anon. 💜

I know you asked me this a while back, but to be honest this is a touchy subject, so I wasn't sure if I wanted to answer it. All I can do is give my honest thoughts based on what I know of these three characters, with all their flaws and personality traits and humanity that goes along with that.

Headcanon: How Dean Winchester, Beau Arlen, and Soldier Boy (Ben) would react to a surprise pregnancy.

(And if you weren't sure about keeping it.)

Tags/Warnings: Established relationship, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff.

Dean Winchester

Once Dean gets past the initial shock, and the inevitable "how did this happen??!", he remembers just how he could've gotten you pregnant. Part of him wants to smile at the memory.

Good times.

He slowly realizes that he's...he's happy.

He never thought that he'd have any piece of "normal" after the way things ended with Lisa. Hell, he never thought he'd find what he had with you, let alone have a kid.

He hasn't told you this, because he's locked it deep within himself and hasn't allowed himself to open that door, but the part of Dean that considered what he would leave behind on this earth if he died--the part of him that wanted a family, is still there, beating in his heart. Maybe now he's finally getting his chance.

But he focuses on you.

He gauges your reaction, and his urge to smile falls away when he realizes you're more nervous and freaked out than excited.

Dean sits down with you, taking your hands to calm you down. He suppresses his own feelings on this for a moment, and he asks you the important question.

"What do you wanna do?"

You look up into his eyes, and you really don't know. The hunting lifestyle you both lead, how can you bring a child into this? Would that be right? Are you even ready to be a mom? Are you even capable?

"I don't know if I can..." you confess. "Dean, I don't know if I'm ready."

It breaks Dean's heart, though he tries not to show it.

For once, he thinks hard about what he's going to say next.

Eventually, he takes a deep breath and squeezes your hands.

"I get it," he says. "Whatever you want to do here, I'll back you up. But for the record, I'm right here with you. I might be screwed to hell in ways that I can't even...but I got no doubts about you, sweetheart. And I know we could do this together..."

If that's what you want. The rest is implied through his eyes. You read it there, clear as day.

You try blinking your tears away. When that fails, you sink into Dean's warm embrace and let him hold you. You press a lingering kiss against his prickly cheek in a wordless thank you. And I love you.

For now, you know that he's with you, and he's not going to let you go.

Beau Arlen

Like Dean, Beau would go through similar rounds of Oh, dear sweet Lord, and holy shit.

He thought you and him had been careful, damn it! But, apparently he's more potent than he thought he was.

For a few moments, it's just pure unadulterated silence between you two...until he looks over at you and tries to figure out what you're thinking.

He's got a half-grown daughter, sixteen going on seventeen. He's approaching his mid-40s. He hadn't even been thinking about the possibility of another kid...at least not yet.

Though he can admit, the thought of having kids with you makes him smile.

"So, uh..." he trails, earning your teary-eyed expression. He softens. "Aw, darlin'. Come 'ere."

He wraps you up in his arms and holds you close. You bury your face into his neck and sniffle, holding onto him tightly.

You love Beau. You truly, truly do, but you don't know if you're ready for this. You had plans, things you wanted to do, things you feel you have to do.

"I don't know, Beau. I don't know what to do," you admit. You don't want to hurt him, even though you know that you are. You can see it in his eyes when you pull back to look at him, though he tries to hide it.

"I'm not going anywhere. You know that, right?" he says. His voice is low and steady. He rubs your back to try and calm you down.

It starts to work. You nod and heave a shaky sigh.

Then you steel yourself, and you work past the fear making your chest tight to ask him an important question.

"What if I tell you that I'm not ready?" you ask.

For once in his life, Beau is quiet. He takes a long beat. So long that your heart begins to break.

But he does answer.

"Then I'd tell you...that I love you," he says. "That I'm with you. That I'll be with you, come whatever. But I gotta tell you...I got no problem being an old-ass dad. If I've got double-knee replacements in my future, then that's just what I gotta do. I'll break my hand building the crib and the porch swing. Hell, I'll build a whole damn tree house."

You can't help but break into giggles through your tears, in the way only Beau manages to accomplish. You stroke his cheek and rest easier against him.

Your heart eases quite a lot just being in Beau's supportive embrace.

Soldier Boy (Ben)

Ben isn't all that shocked when you tell him that you're pregnant.

His surprise quickly fades into a pleased grin, and he pulls you into his lap to kiss you. Fucking finally...

But he stops short, realizing that you're not as happy as he expected you to be. Actually, you look anxious, and even scared.

"What's the matter?" he asks, his voice deep and direct.

You hesitate to meet his gaze, but you gain the courage to do so, resting a hand on his chest.

"Ben, I wanted to be honest with you, and so I am. I'm just...I'm not sure about this."

His brows furrow. "What's not to be sure about?"

Your gaze drops from his, making him frown. Upset begin to rise in his chest, disguised as anger. When you rise to get off his lap, he grasps your hand to stop you from walking away from him.

"Hey..." But then it hits him. The realization dawns, and deep inside, it hurts him. "You better not be saying what I think you're fucking saying."

Tears begin to well up in your eyes. Your heart clenches tight in pain just watching him work it out in his mind. You try to tug your hand out of his.

"Ben, please. Don't make this harder for me--"

He stands, but doesn't let go of you.

"What, you think I won't take care of you? You think I wouldn't take care of my own kid?" he says angrily.

"That's not it!" you say, shaking your head. "I just need some time to think, for Christ's sake!"

"What's there to think about? If you give a shit about us, about what we have? All that ain't fucking good enough for you?" Ben says incredulously, gesturing at the home you two live in, and the life he thought you were happy with. "What the fuck is the problem?"

You look up at him in frustration with tears in your eyes, slipping down your cheeks. You shake your head at him.

This," you say. "This is the problem."

This time, when you tug sharply against his hold, Ben actually lets you go. You walk away from him and slam the door to your bedroom.

Ben just stands there for a while. The silence is only broken when he can hear you in the bedroom, trying to muffle your weeping.

Something unsavory churns in Ben's chest, squeezing tight around his heart. It's the sting of regret, both unfamiliar and irritating.

Blowing out a sigh, Ben cards his fingers through his hair. He can either stand here like an idiot, or he can do something worthwhile.

He goes to you. You haven't locked the door (not that that would matter), so he opens it. He sees you burrowed under the covers, laying on your side away from him. You turn away from him again when he approaches.

Almost hesitantly, he sits down beside you, smoothing a hand over your hair.

"Sweetheart, you're gonna have everything you need. You don't need to worry about anything," he says.

"I told you, it's not about that," you say sharply. "It's not about money, or being comfortable."

Ben endeavors to be calm. He counts to five in his mind, then he squeezes your shoulder, taking pains to be gentle.

"Then what's it about?"

After a beat, you finally turn around to face him.

"I just don't know if I'm ready for this," you admit. "We haven't been together that long, and I..."

Ben shakes his head. He strokes your cheek with his thumb.

"Don't worry about that," he says. He hesitates to say anything more.

The truth is, he cares about you more than he's been willing to express. The thought of you leaving him, or even not going through with this pregnancy--both cut him down to the bone.

Is it that you don't trust him? Do you not trust yourself? He doesn't understand all of what's in your head, but if the reason you're not sure about having his kid really is because of him, then...

His curled fingers brush along your jaw and prop under your chin, until your eyes meet his.

"Look, whatever reservations you have about me, just know this," he says. "I'm not going anywhere."

You sigh softly. You know how long Ben has wanted to be a father. You know he wants a family. You don't want to take that away from him, but you also need to protect yourself.

You consider his words carefully, as well as his face, and you see that he actually means it. You believe him.

It doesn't take away other concerns you have, but it's a start.

You sit up in bed, letting the sheets slip away from you. You reach up a hand to cup his bearded cheek.

He lets you guide him down to kiss you, his arm wrapping around you strong, but noticeably gentle. Tears sting behind your closed eyelids.

Maybe he is ready to be a father, and a better man.

AN: 😮‍💨 This one was angsty, huh? I think Ben's part was the one that held me up the most. It still assumes he's had some character growth from having a "real," actually caring relationship, but I tried not to sugarcoat what I think his reaction would be.

Let me know what you think! 💜

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[httpsdana]

Angst 16 and 3 for rasmus pleaseeee ! Love all ur stuff

Right Where You Left Me~Rasmus Højlund

・❥・prompt list

・❥・masterlist -> part 2

・❥・who I write for

3-“You don't get to decide when you come in and out of my life”

16-“We're stuck in this endless cycle and I'm so tired”

The rain was loud, almost too loud, but it fit the atmosphere perfectly. The tension, the silence, all of it was suffocating to the point where the sound of the thunder and rain was the only comforting thing.

He stood there in silence, as if waiting for her to explain what's wrong, acting as if not everything was wrong.

"you're gonna wait for me to speak first?" she finally said, making his blue eyes snap to hers. He crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back against the kitchen counter.

"I'm not the one making a problem out of everything" he shrugged, making her anger increase at his carelessness.

"Do you hear yourself? you're acting as if you haven't been the one constantly leaving like it's normal for you to ghost your girlfriend for two whole fucking months Rasmus" she snapped, her voice showing the anger and disappointment she has held in for too long.

"I told you I was busy! I had to go back to Denmark for my recovery before travelling with the team for our match. Why are you making this about you?" he raised his voice, his frustration showing too

"You could've told me at least!" she said, letting out a sigh. "Not just go away and not answer my texts after you promised you wouldn't do that again. you promised me Rasmus"

Flashback

The blanket was spread out on the floor of the rooftop, the two of them gazing up at the stars in silence, before he spoke up.

"I'm sorry for leaving earlier, I wasn't supposed to do that without telling you. It won't happen again" he said, his voice soft, almost too soft.

"it's okay Ras. just promise me you won't do it again" she said, her voice vulnerable, tugging at the strings of his heart as she pressed a kiss on his jaw.

"I promise darling"

She shook her head at the recent memory, as if he hadn't said that he'd never do that again. how stupid was she to believe him

"you're making a big deal out of this. I told you I'm sorry, is that not enough for you?" he said

She looked at him with wide eyes, like she's not believing what he's saying.

Was that really the Rasmus who had promised her the best life she could ask for?

"no it's not enough Rasmus" she whispered, her voice too weak to be heard. "We're stuck in this endless cycle and I'm so tired"

He stepped closer, his hands reaching to hold hers but she immediately pulled away, hurt flashing through his eyes, but he was quick to mask it away.

"and I'm tired too. i just want you to understand me. Understand that what I'm doing this for us" he tried reasoning with her, but his words seemed hollow, empty.

"for us? how is leaving me and acting like I don't exist for us? this is just for you because you realized you're unable to handle a relationship, even after giving me all these empty fucking promises that you could never keep!" she yelled, breathing out as she let out all her anger.

Rasmus shook his head, threading his fingers through his blond strands of hair.

"But I came back didn't i? i came back because I don't want to end this. I want you. i love you" he said, stepping closer to her, trapping her body with his and the counter behind her.

"no Rasmus. You don't get to decide when you come in and out of my life. I'm done" she shook her head, pushing him away and leaving, or trying to leave the kitchen.

He grabbed her wrist and pulled her into him, his chest hard beneath her back.

"so you're just gonna give up on us? Is it that easy for you?" he said, his voice trembling as he spoke.

"oh don't you turn this around. You gave up on us ages ago when you decided to leave with no explanation and come back with meaningless promises. Goodbye Rasmus" she pulled her wrist away, and stormed out of the kitchen.

Rasmus stood there, shocked, confused. He knew what he did was wrong, but he hadn't expected it to end this way.

And as for her, she knew this was for the best, but this was gonna hurt more than the countless times he left her with nothing but her heavy heart.

my taglist: @barcapix @paucubarsisimp @spidybaby @mxryxmfooty @n0vazsq @joaosnovia (lmk if you want to be added!!)

[alwaysthepessimist]

I find this take interesting because to me, it was always clear the grandmother was paying more attention to Oom because she thought Oom needed it more than AI. We saw in the flashbacks (showed in the beginning of the show) that Oom was a sick child. If i remember correctly, it was said that their parents died in a car accident while they were trying to accompany Oom to the hospital. And people were gossiping about it right it front of Oom too. In contrast, Ai framed herself as Oom protector not only because she was the oldest sibling, but also because she was healthier and bolder. I think the grandmother saw how fragile Oom was compared to her sister and how guilty she might have felt towards their parents and so she showered her of affection to compensate. At least that's how i felt when i saw the flashbacks.

She thought Ai was gonna be able to take it because unlike Oom, AI was "stronger" and seemed more independent . Obviously she was wrong, but I can't say I was surprised she acted the way she did, because some parents, while raising a child with health issues, do end up paying less attention to their other children. As the years passed, Oom became healthier and so, the grandma could've changed the way she treated them both. But i think that, by that point, they had kinda reached a status quo regarding their dynamic and since nobody was complaining about it, the grandma didn't realized how bad she was hurting AI and her relationship with her sister. But then, we saw a shift in her behavior. First when Ai told her it would've been better had it been her in the accident, and then when Ai confessed to her that she stopped her studies to help her pay for Oom's own studies. That's when i felt like she realized, she had messed up because we can see that after this , she changed the way she acted towards Ai.

When it comes to Oom and her relationship to May, I do think you have a point here

I can't believe the show has decided to reframe this as the grandmother just knowing that one of her grandchildren was strong enough to not need comfort and that it's GOOD that she could trust her five year old granddaughter to take care of herself.

But also framing their relationship as jealousy... of the one who was constantly pushed away and hated herself and thought her family hated her but apparently they just thought she was too popular and too strong to need anything!?!? WHY IS THIS SHOW LIKE THIS?!

Ai spent her entire life feeling like she could never been enough and wasn't loved because they... thought she was strong and popular!? WHAT. WHAT. This makes no actual sense with the rest of the show except that the rest of the show was specifically set up to be a deceit which is just... a thing.

We met and Ai who thought her life was worth so much less than her sister's that she didn't think anyone would care if she was in the hospital instead of her sister and now we're supposedly being told that everyone loved her sooooo much instead.

I just... really? Really? This is what the show is gonna do now? Why? Why is this a thing?! Everyone just decided Ai was strong enough to be completely left alone and shown no affection and apparently thought she'd just feel loved magically through osmosis?

You could try, I don't know, having been nicer to her? Maybe? At any point in your relationship and especially once you were adults? The only reason Ai ever wasn't the sister who loved you was because you and grandma basically treated her like she was, apparently, too strong to need any kind of emotional care or love.

Ah, yes, that's how people feel about children in their care that. Sigh. Ai spent a lifetime being neglected and feeling constantly disliked and Oab hated herself so much for... not being as good as her, I guess?! that she literally sacrificed an entire relationship just for that jealousy.

Because, seriously, if Oom had just stayed in the relationship with May they both could have easily been happy. May having a one time crush n Ai when they were teenagers and then meeting Oom and falling in love with her didn't need to be a death sentence for their relationship, it could so easily have been just a story that they laughed about years down the line instead of this nightmare.

WHATEVER, man.

Apparently everyone in this family sucks and blamed themselves for sucking when it was mostly just grandma's fault.

[icannotgetoverbirds]

):

[drysauce]

i mean it in the best way possible (to u) but wow from what u've been posting ur uni friends sound like fucking cunts. hope it gets better :/

haha well, yeah no i agree with you

the thing is it's not really uni friends. those just either don't reply or reply that they're busy when it's about something esle than school, they're clear with us that they have their own friend groups they value more and outside of the university setting we don't really keep in touch too much. i mean i tried befriending one girl but it eventually backfired at me so i decided it's not worth to spend my time and health on that

the thing that's happening lately is with people i have known before for ~5 years out of which one of them is my rommate. and only around january/february this year it started becoming clear what we stand on. that's probably why the whole thing is so frustrating to me now, especially that situationship with my roommate/best friend that we ended up in. it's such a complicated and multilayered situation at this point that it's just simply more tiring than upsetting

but in any case thanks for nice words, i hope it gets better too

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

If there is at least one thing I can credit FE for doing better than Tales in localization, it's not trying to actively go out of their way for an entire game to avoid subtext or direct text between two men that is romantic or implied romantic. Funny when it's so present that the attempt doesn't even work; infuriating that it was attempted to begin with.

So as much as I often have issues with some of FE's localizations, at least they have a leg up on loc Tales for that.

[gaydryad]

so for Writing Reasons I've been going back through all my old personal writing (including some very old social media posting) and the sheer force with which I wanted to dress up or roleplay "as a guy" from ages 12 to 15 is truly stunning. WHILE BEING AWARE OF TRANS AND NONBINARY PEOPLE. AS A OPTION. FULLY ZERO-BRAIN-CELL AWARENESS-ZERO ASS EGG

[daz4i]

hate when i vent abt my pain and ppl tell me "everyone has stomach aches, it's normal" okay but are their pains bad enough to make them cry or unable to stand..... at least once a week...... bc i think that if this was normal society might've collapsed by now. but what do i know

[protect-namine]

had to go (near) bgc today......... I was so STRESSED just being there. I haven't been there in years but I get flashbacks to how bad commuting to and from bgc was like. and that stress is just gonna follow me every time I'm near that area

ofc no one here knows what I'm talking about except for maybe like a handful of people, but just know that if you're ever in metro manila, do NOT believe anyone who says it's nice to be in bgc. it is a soulless capitalistic haven without good public transportation. dude I'd rather commute to makati, or hell, mall of asia than bgc. bgc is a hellscape (if it's not apparent from the post, I live in north metro manila) (this is also funny bc like. it shouldn't be terrible to go to bgc bc it's quite near makati but makati is sooooo much more accessible. commuting to and from bgc and makati itself is also its own nightmare)

[nihilismtrcit]

SCHOOL YEAR OFFICIALLY OVERRRR 🎉🎉🎉

this was a long ass year but the last month and a half was really tough with my co-teacher leaving without much warning. still v much wish her The Worst✨ bc i am a bitch who holds grudges but honestly so glad her negative energy is gone. i’ll actually be getting not just a new teaching partner (who i met and she’s LOVELY and has a similar vibe as me) but also a whole new first grade team. and the three of us are all super chill! also our whole classroom’s getting redone and i’ll be stepping into the new role i requested working as special ed support in the room

excited for next year! but first, SUMMER

[celenawrites]

After half a month of waiting, they cancelled my order of "The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes". I'm sad af :(

[cyphyra]

currently having a crisis over the real possibility of having to cut dairy out bc my tolerance seems to get worse by the day

[drysauce]

really mad at how my father asked me if i saw the reanimation action like it was some kind of a spectacle after a guy drowned at the beach today

[softwaluigi]

why is there just one guy who gets to keep all the memories over here. like can I have some of those

[snekdood]

every time im like "hey lets go finish sorting that art from that time period that sucked a lot" i go and i even just glance at it and get triggered and then try to distract myself.