#but like we cannot be having that on larger projects

[avatar-aaang]

oh okay. I stuck one of the signs and I see why he said i might not wanna do it lol

[5-htagonist]

l@imari has a place in my heart fr

[badgertracksart]

Portfolio advice, from a lead who hires Concept Artists

(This was originally a twitter thread I wrote before the site self imolated, hense it's strange structure.) I wrote this after a weekend of portfolio reviews - 1. Like a maths exam, please please show your working. I want to see thumbs options, mid options and of course a final design.

2. Arrange your portfolio, I don't want to bounce about between subject matter and pipeline. Your portfolio's narrative should be as strong as your work... 3. Please make worlds that excite the viewer, make them want to go in and explore them, explain to them the interesting parts of the town, or the way the character's hat unfolds. How will this draw the viewer in? 4. As I've said before the majority of your project work is explanatory not mood, make sure your portfolio contains explanatory work. Explained here -

5. A lot of beautiful post apocolyptic paintings, , but 80% of realistic games and film, we just give the environment artists photo ref, they are capable artists in their own right. Different work in stylised where you do need to create rules for how things can be translated. 6. Production art contains call out sheets, material references and flat graphics. This doesn't have to be your final image, but it should support it.

7. Design characters on a swatch(es) of the environment they will be viewed in. Not on white. I make swatch backgrounds from screenshots, it avoids assumptions that damage readability. 8. Reverse of this, put people in your environments, show me the scale.

9. It's not a deal breaker for a review, but if you intend to get a job, please show me your work on a screen larger than a smartphone (print outs probably the cheapest option with the best battery life). 10. Please have your contact details clearly visible, and by that I mean email address, I will not pass your social media contact on, I cannot input your form into my tracking system. EMAIL ADDRESS emblazoned and bake it in, sometimes recruiters do funky stuff to pdfs

11. Your portfolio will never feel done, not to you anyway. You will have learnt from your latest pieces and want to apply it to older work. But we know art is a journey. Send your portfolio anyway. I've been in the industry 10+ years and my portfolio is still not 'finished'. 12. If you are applying to an environment centric Concept Art position then please vary your times of day! Golden hour is cool but show me some happy sunny days, looming overcast days, what about at night? Vary your weather too! Sunny snowy day? Rainy Spring day? Stormy night?

13. If you are applying for a character centric Concept Art role then please ensure your portfolio shows a variety of body types and ethnicities. 14. Designing characters for games? Please show back views and feet (!) Many potfolios contain only front views. This is a problem because:

You haven't shown you are considering the design from all angles.

In many games rear view is the main view.

Stop cropping feet.

15. If you are entry / graduating and looking at Portfolios to compare content and standard of yr own work too, look at hired grad/junior artists as opposed to seniors Seniors and leads often have old or personal work in their portfolio which isnt representative of the day job. 16a. Show clearly the intended use case for your Concept Art. Mention the game type in the description. Are these player character designs for a 3rd person adventure game? Then more back views please. Bonus points for diagetic ways of showing health / equipment / role etc.

16b. Are these designs for an FPS? Then really the player view of the gun needs to sell the player style/ choices, in an FPS your weapons are almost your character. Are these world designs? What's the view distance? For an RTS your shapes need to read from above & a distance. 16c. The lack of clarification means I am judging the design in isolation, which both harms the design (you might be considering the backview of a char as the main adventure character.) Or an NPC, their waist up expressions may be important for conveying exposition and mechanics.

16d. Concept art is not separate from gameplay, great concept art serves the game team before it is a good illustration.

17. Play games. A variety of games. Think about them. IMO to be a good concept artist you need to understand the common language & references used by your peers. Also understand the principles and common language your audience are used to. FPS design rules are v.diff from RTS.

18. There are many skills that are needed in concept art, please show them. For example: Graphic design - logos, liveries, typographic use etc. VFX concepts - Abilities, Ambience, motion concepts. Architectural knowledge - How buildings are built! & more but I'm out of space :O

[inhuman-obey-me]

So. The OM news.

Solmare announced on Wednesday that December will be the "final new content" for the two mobile games. Going along with that, Lesson 60 will also be the end of story content in Nightbringer.

Definitely quite some news to take in, and one that's gotten everyone into quite a tizzy, understandably.

First, a clarification: The games are NOT going into End-of-Service (not yet, anyway). Both the OG game and Nightbringer will continue on as-is, just without any new content in general starting in January. This means that we are still going to have access to all the content we've had up to this point, like the main story, Lonely Devil, Devilgrams, Time Chronicle, etc. The announcement also stated that "past events will continue to be periodically re-released," and while it's not completely clear what those re-releases are going to look like, it sounds like the apps themselves will still be around for a while.

Secondly, this is also not the end of the Obey Me franchise. The announcement specifically says, "We promise you that this will not be the end of the seven brothers, the Devildom, or of Obey Me!" It also mentions a "new era" with "new forms of content," and Solmare themselves tried to clarify this the day after too, with assurance that new projects ARE in the works. So this is not the end of our beloved boys (and Thirteen)!!

Now, we don't actually know what this "new era" is going to look like, or what specific kinds of new projects this is referring to. We have been specifically promised new in-person events and merchandise, but of course, that's not particularly promising news for tons of us in the fandom who are not in areas that usually get those events or those who cannot afford to buy the merch, which have sometimes been hard to access for those outside of Japan.

Based on a couple of the VAs' tweets, we do know that OM is specifically moving beyond "アプリゲーム" (app game) format, which means we should not expect a third mobile game anytime soon. (And honestly, thank fuck, because we think we speak for a lot of us in saying the community's trust would just be so broken at that point!) And given their involvement, there are some ideas we can probably safely strike out. But until we get more official information, anything else on this is pretty much just speculation at this point.

But hey, on this blog, we love to speculate and theorize and make wild guesses as to what's going to happen next in OM, don't we? So let's speculate!

Firstly, any kind of print format like light novels and further manga volumes wouldn't involve the VAs, so those are probably out. But we do have the manga volumes they already released, so one possibility could be making a proper anime off of the manga version of the main story! When the gag anime originally released, many people expressed interest in seeing the main story converted into an anime, so that could be an interesting avenue for them to pursue.

Another option would be for them to go down a more audio-focused route. Though we haven't gotten much Otaku FM content in quite a long time, they've only released a couple of characters for their ASMR project so far, and hopefully they will still continue it for the rest of the characters. It's possible that they could bring back Otaku FM or Boys in the House content, especially to promote other new content in this new era. And multiple of the OM voice actors are involved with the Ex and Bee, which seems to have somewhat low numbers so far but has been said to be good (though we haven't looked into it ourselves), so it could be possible for them to try out a similar audio drama format with OM, as a more established IP.

Also, while the VAs seem to be saying that app games (mobile) are done for now, that doesn't necessarily mean we couldn't get a PC or console game. This could open up a possibility of a more traditional route-based style of otome game, which could give the writers a better position at balancing romance with the larger world adventure elements, and then just extending it with things like DLCs, fan discs, etc. Hard to say if Solmare has the budget to pull off something like that, but it would probably be more up their alley as a game studio and still give their programmers things to do assuming they haven't all been laid off with the current state of the games industry.

And then, of course, we have more things like Overture, the "concert" they put on with new 3D models of the brothers. Even if they can't afford a full-fledged console game, they could definitely still use those models in other ways, but also in more Overture-like concerts. Though personally, we would prefer if they didn't -- no one got into OM to have an idol group game. There are a million idol games and franchises already, and while it's fine as extra content on the side we guess, they're not really strong contenders against all of the actual idol games already out there. But there's money in that genre, so who knows if whatever execs may continue pushing it that direction...

And finally, another possibility, though perhaps also not a very likely one, is a theater show. It's pretty common for animes and such to also have stage productions in Japan. Luke's and Diavolo's VAs in particular have also done theater, including musical theater, so it's not a foreign concept to some of the team. But given the limited geographical scope of something like that, this wouldn't really be good for anyone outside of, like, probably only Tokyo? Still, stranger things have happened, so it's not outside the realm of possibility.

Speculation and all aside...we've been here since basically the beginning, when OG Obey Me was released back in December 2019. The end of content in the games is bittersweet, and we'll certainly be sad after NB Lesson 60 is released. Despite all of its flaws, OM is what got us both back into writing and drawing after a very long time. We started this blog! Neither of us had ever done a fandom blog before! It's been something near and dear (if even frustratingly so) to us for the past five years, so we'll be watching for what's coming next! And in the meantime, we're still here with you all too, for however slowly we put our stuff out.

[probablyasocialecologist]

In November 2023, news broke that a number of Western energy companies, including British Petroleum (BP), were granted gas exploration licences in occupied Palestinian waters by the Israeli Ministry of Energy. While it will take years before these sites are converted into reliable sources of gas, activist groups in the US and Britain have protested these business deals, brokered in the shadow of an ongoing genocide. The motivation for Israel’s genocidal, Western-backed siege on Gaza cannot be reduced to the exploitation of its marine gas fields. The ongoing genocide should be understood as part of the logic of US imperialism and its proxy state which enacts its interests in the region: the Zionist settler colonial project, which seeks to ethnically cleanse all of historic Palestine, seize natural resources, and use and export its fuel supplies for the consolidation of its military and economic power.  Indeed, our protests against BP’s gas licences are not in isolation. Like other activist groups in Turkey and Colombia, we campaign against energy companies partnering with Israeli businesses to supply fuel to Israel. For this reason, we situate BP’s gas licence within its larger role in fuelling Israel. BP is the operator and largest shareholder of the Baku-Tbilisi-Ceyhan (BTC) oil pipeline, which is supplying Israel with 28% of its oil during its genocide. In this investigation we explore BP’s colonial history and the supply chain of the BTC pipeline. We also delve into the social licences that facilitate BP’s operations abroad. Social licences are a commercial and metaphorical concept describing corporations' process of acquiring public approval as an added layer of legitimacy for their ongoing profit-driven, colonial business practices. Focusing on the BTC pipeline reveals how Zionist settler-colonialism is central to the continued extraction of oil in the Middle East, and global uneven accumulation, where wealth is concentrated in the Global North. The liberation of Palestine and regional anti-Zionist resistance must therefore be central to the larger struggle against capitalism and for a just transition. Organising from the imperial core against the Zionist occupation of Palestine then becomes about much more than just holding the perpetrators of genocide to account. It is part of the bigger fight against imperialism – which exterminates populations and ecologies for the continued flow of value to the Global North.

9 September 2024

[strawberrystepmom]

senku x f!reader. senku and reader are both 25, reader has a hair that can be tucked behind her ear. wc 1.5k

You aren’t sure what time it is. The sun has been set for long enough that you know it is well into nighttime, stars twinkling right outside of your window. The oil lamp in your home is still lit and you sit next to Senku on the floor, pages and pages of plans he has drawn in front of the two of you. He has spent most of the evening and night explaining his plans to you, each of them a bigger and bolder leap than the last. Usually you’d be listening to him raptly and you have done so for most of the evening but right now you feel a little…sleepy.

You keep catching yourself shutting your eyes and fluttering them open, the smooth and mellow sound of the scientist’s voice doing little to prevent your relaxation and comfort. Maybe you listen to him too much, wrapping his knowledge around you like a warm blanket, letting it keep you believing in the world the two of you desire for the people you care about. This is your usual evening routine, anyway.

He walks you to your home once dinner is done and the two of you talk all through the night. Neither of you sleeps easily; this is the first thing you learned about each other all those months ago. Racing minds with big plans rarely rest but the lead up into the summer has been grueling, planting and assisting with the late spring births of the horses and one of the cows.

It’s nothing personal against him. Tonight, you’re just sleepy.

“We would need to do some significant clearing of the forest around 38 kilometers away from here for this one, so we will need to build machinery first.”

Humming your response your eyes fall shut again and Senku chuckles when he turns to look at you. Your arms are folded over your chest and your eyes are shut so tightly it has to be painful. Exhaustion seeps from you and he moves closer in your direction, sliding across the floor until your hip touches his. The touch startles you awake and you smile when your eyes pop open and see him glancing at you fondly.

“Hey,” he mutters quietly. “You tired?”

You shake your head stubbornly and he smirks, watching you make a show out of straightening your slumped posture. Sighing, you smile again and wipe your thumbs over your eyes to keep them from closing again immediately.

“You said clearing the forest a ways out, right? We could probably do that now if we went with larger groups of people for shorter amounts of time, it would just take all summer.”

He nods, humming himself and scribbling your notes down on the plans he created for whatever he wants to build there. You can tell he’s writing because you hear his own handcrafted pen nib scribbling over the scratchy paper the settlement has been using ever since yourself and your friend, the doctor, started taking the time to make it.

It’s a reservoir, you remember and your eyes fly open with a gasp. Senku looks up at you and furrows his eyebrows, still scribbling away without even looking. Rather than show his concern, he turns it into a joke so he can gauge how exhausted you really are by how hard you laugh.

“You like the idea that much?”

Giggles bubble out of you uncontrollably and he cannot help but chuckle along at a few of them. It’s official, you are deliriously sleepy, laughing over nothing.

“Alright, let’s get you to bed…” your friend (although the blurry edges of friendship and lover seem more and more smudged every day) starts to rise to his feet but you grab his hand and stop him, pulling him back down to the ground beside you gently.

“No, I’m fine and I’m listening. Keep explaining.”

You have shown him this isn’t true but who is he to deny a willing audience? Settling back down, he begins talking about his second summer project which are technological improvements for the grain bins and corn silos to keep them climate controlled. Humming your interest every few words, your eyes feel heavy again and you no longer fight them, slumping forward. You just need to rest your eyes.

“Minor changes may help us keep larger quantities fresher for lon…”

Senku cuts himself off when he looks over at you. He dares to reach out, brushing a strand of hair that has fallen over your face behind your ear. This far the motion hasn’t startled you so he presses further, brushing the cold tips of his fingers against the shell of your ear. This startles you enough that your eyes open again and he feels the skin beneath his fingertips heat as you realize he’s touching you.

“Cold fingers.”

Your sleepy remark makes the man chuckle again and he brushes his thumb down the remainder of your ear lobe, feeling hardened cartilage and soft skin and long closed holes where earrings once resided.

“Let’s go to bed.”

You perk up slightly at the suggestion that he’ll be joining you. It would be far from the first time the two of you have shared this intimacy, falling asleep in shared space before either of you were aware of the other's feelings. Well, Senku was aware of your feelings at least considering that you’re pretty bad at hiding them. For a moment you worry you’ve overestimated his want to be around you and you pout, looking up at his now standing form and the hand he’s holding out to help you up.

“Will you stay?”

He nods, wiggling his fingers to make sure you know to grab his hand before standing. Tired legs are wobbly ones and it finally strikes him as funny that this is the moment you’re vulnerable enough to ask for what you want from him. Not the nights you’ve cried while talking about how much you miss your family or when you were sick with fever that made you babble half awake for days on end in the wintertime.

“Good,” you mutter while grabbing his hand. Your head swims with even the simplest touches from him and it makes you feel incredibly immature and silly, more of a girl pining so hard even a glance makes her giddy than the grown woman you are. He helps you over to the small area you sleep in, grateful you’re already in your pajamas, and helps you into the heap of furs and blankets.

Rolling into the mess of blankets, you pat the space next to you and he laughs at your eagerness to be this close to him, unbuttoning his shirt and pulling it over his head. You are too sleepy to stay alert but your eyes, heavy as they are, simply cannot shut fully when he is half clothed standing this close to you. He unfastens his belt and lets it fall to the floor, keeping his pants on and crawling into the pile beside you.

“If you aren’t sleepy, you can keep talkin’.”

Your voice is thin and more of a mumble than it is anything else but Senku laughs, rolling over to face you and tucking the same unruly hair that keeps sticking out back behind your ear so he can look at your face. Your eyes are shut far more gently than they were moments ago and your mouth is relaxed and suddenly he realizes that your face is illuminated a little too brightly for likely the wee hours of the night…damn it he left the lamp on across the room.

He isn’t particularly sleepy anyway and he sighs, using his light touch on your head as a means to guide you in his direction, stopping just short of pressing his lips against your hairline. This wouldn’t be the first time he kissed you, the other time was during a far less chaste and aphrodisiac fueled scenario the two of you mutually agreed to never mention again after it happened, but he stops himself.

Senku has considered every mathematical possibility. Every scenario, every tried and true and tested theory, every last trail he could possibly chase in his own overflowing brain to figure out how he ended up in a situation he could ever be this close to you. It was improbable before petrification and probably close to impossible after it yet it happened.

He closes the small gap between your hair and his lips and kisses you so gently all your face does is twitch in response, sleep finally winning over your willingness to listen to your very good friend explain his thought processes until dawn.

Quickly rolling out of bed, he scurries across the floor as fast as he can to shut the lamp off and heads back into the warmth of the space next to you. You shift and smack your lips together, eyes closed and brows twisting.

“Senku?”

He gently brushes your arm with his index and middle fingers, lying on his side and watching you get settled back in.

“Right here, don’t worry about it.”

The assurance is enough for you to relax and he watches you return to sleep, smiling wistfully and considering how he could do this every night. He doesn’t want to consider the possibility of forever, knowing how quickly people one cares about can be ripped away in the new world, but it’s something to at least entertain while your breath comes in soft puffs at his side.

[reddpenn]

The current state of the Rock Wall!

Video transcript:

Who wants a tour of my rock collection?

I guess we’ll start over here; this is the newest shelf. I just added it. A lot of stuff from the other shelves have now joined this shelf. It’s got a nice little sliding glass door to protect my more high-end specimens. On this we have a lot of my thumbnails, including some of the more delicate, or some of the more valuable thumbnails. Some of my more high-end specimens over here, like that beautiful wulfenite.

I have started labeling the stones now, so some of the stones have these neat little labels, and some of them do not. But everything in this case does.

And then of course some of the larger high-end specimens down here. And I’m not sure what I’m gonna put on those lower shelves yet.

Up above that I have a new display case, and this is where I’m putting all of my cabochons.

So here I’ve gotten it down and we’ll open it up. This is all velcro. I made this myself out of a normal shadowbox that I got at the store. These are all attached by velcro so that I can take them out and rearrange them and add more to them and move them around.

This case is lighted. The case next to it is technically lighted, but the lights are out of battery right now. Eventually I want to switch that to something more permanent that can be plugged in all the time so I don’t have to constantly swap out the batteries.

This is the Original Rock Shelf, so it is crammed full of some of my oldest specimens. I recently did a project where I added these acrylic risers to it to kinda make a little bit of space, which made it a bit less crammed, which is nice. A lot of specimens on this shelf. Buch of geodes down there. That’s Geode Territory.

Next to it, below the North American giant ground sloth bone, we have more of my thumbnail specimens. Just a bunch of little guys. I’d like to light this shelf too. I think that would help them show up better. The meteorite collection is over here. We got some rust on this guy, but I think he’s doing okay. And then over here, my opal collection. So here is the Ethiopian opals, we’ve got an Australian opal, we’ve got a Honduran opal back there. That one up there is also Ethiopian opal, right in the middle.

Down below that, just more of the really tiny stuff, and some miscellaneous stuff.

The spheres and eggs are under that. The one under a cloth is a reconstituted quartz. If I leave it where sunlight can hit it, it’ll burn my house down so I just keep it covered because I’m a little bit paranoid about that.

Miscellaneous stuff: I got some tumbled stones, I got some palm stones. Just… stuff gets thrown down on that shelf.

The shelf next to it. This was at one point my large specimen and high-end shelf, and at this point is just the large specimen shelf because the high-end shelf is now over here. Which has made this shelf a lot less crowded, to move all that stuff over. Again, I’ve got my acrylic risers on there. I have a bunch of my big specimens. I’d like to light this shelf too. You can see how the shadows are kind of a problem like on the halite in the back there.

And then below those are the agates. This shelf is the bane of my existence. I have so many agates that I physically cannot cram any more agates onto this shelf. I’m gonna need to get some more risers and see if I can clear a little bit of space for the agate collection.

Down below that, some more miscellaneous large things. Got a jade, got a labradorite, got a kambaba stone. In the box is vivianite, but it can’t be exposed to light, so it lives in a box. And then here I have another one of these shadowboxes that opens up, and it’s got a bunch of gem jars inside of my very very small stuff.

And then over here, this is the shelf where my newest stuff starts living. Stuff that I’ve added to my collection most recently. This is also where all the fossils are living currently. And in that box is all the crinoids I just pick up off the ground. We have a ton of them around here.

Underneath that we’ve got this big desert rose, fills the whole shelf.

Next to that I have this tiny shelf that has some of my rock-adjacent things like my mineralogy puzzles. Tully lives here. Some of my mineralogy books but not all of them. They don’t all fit.

And that’s the short and sweet tour of the current state of my rock collection!

[stranger-rants]

The unwillingness of Stranger Things fans to engage with Billy's story in a thoughtful, nuanced manner is symptomatic of a larger problem in how we treat survivors. When this attitude is applied to real survivors, it leads to systemic barriers that eventually kill them.

People are constantly bringing a Survival of the Fittest mentality to the discussion table when it comes to survivors of abuse, but "fittest" broadly means people who survived abuse in the most socially acceptable manner. Anyone who doesn't survive the way they're supposed to is deemed unworthy of it, and in the case that a survivor eventually does die due to what they have to endure then their death is celebrated for "proving" that bad survivors don't deserve to survive.

Even if you pay lip service to it, it's not enough to claim empathy for Billy as a survivor in your analysis while criticizing his actions if in the act of criticizing his actions, you project your prejudices towards survivors onto him. That includes placing blame onto him for things he did not say or do. That includes ignoring his circumstances. That includes blaming him for things he did not have agency over, such as the complete loss of bodily autonomy he explicitly suffers on screen.

There's a good reason why "nobody ever says" that Billy was physically abusive to Max because there is no evidence that Billy was physically abusing her, and we need to stop cheapening the word "abuse" to refer to any instance of violence. A fight is not abuse. The fact that Billy has gotten into physical altercations or even started them is no indication that Billy does or will abuse his sibling.

This belief that survivors who are reactive to perceived threats and to violence are abusive in their own lives is in fact harmful to survivors. I am not discounting the fact that survivors can become abusers. However, abuse involves a pattern of behavior that establishes power and control over a victim.

Any violence or cruelty towards Max is not excusable, but Billy does not continually physically abuse Max. If that was the story they wanted to tell, then we would have seen evidence of it. We didn't. He grabbed her wrist once and let her go. Any time he is on Max's case about where she is and what she is doing is because he is put in charge of her by their parents. We did in fact see the consequences of Max not "obeying" Billy - Billy gets beaten.

You cannot divorce Billy's attitude and behavior towards Max from the fact that her very presence jeopardizes his safety and survival. You also cannot ignore the fact that Max's parents are at fault for endangering her life if Billy did abuse her. But, there is no concrete evidence that Billy was abusing Max in the manner that some of you like to argue. The fact of the matter is that Billy wanted nothing to do with her and vice versa.

It is absolutely disingenuous and disgusting to then (mis)characterize Billy based on the possession of his body and striping of his agency to portray him as a physically and sexually abusive monster who preys on his sister when he consistently wants nothing to do with Max. You cannot be serious, and you cannot be trusted to talk about abuse survivors when you're more willing to fantasize about Max as a victim than you are willing to acknowledge all the ways in which Billy was systematically abused and controlled by his father, by the adult women preying on him, by the Mindflayer, by Vecna...

[autistic-robin]

Why “Hiding in the Light” Didn’t Work: Stranger Things’ Psychospiritual Implications

Supplementary Sources: Jungian Theory & A Wrinkle In Time

Alright, buckle in. I’m running on a year’s worth of spiritual awakening, deep dives into Jungian theory and non-dualism, and my own ego’s primary coping mechanism: immersing myself in media as escapism. The purpose of this analysis is to break down the themes of non-dualism and light/darkness in ST (and maybe predict some character arcs), and also to position the narrative of ST as a psychospiritual wake-up call.

For some context: last year, I discovered the work of psychoanalyst (or philosopher, depending on who you’re talking to) Carl Jung. He had a pretty extensive theory about the human psyche that I immediately connected to the themes throughout Stranger Things, specifically Vecna’s mind control and curse. I’m going to break Jung’s theory down as succinctly as I can, and then delve into how it plays out in our favorite gay monster show.

But before I delve into Jung’s ideas, I also think it’s important to define selfhood (you’ll understand why in a minute). For the purposes of this analysis, the experience of the “self” is an illusion created by our senses, perceptions, memories, and consciousness, all of which are impermanent. Therefore, the self is what we call “conditioned.” There is no you or me, just the ideas we have of ourselves.

Now, we can get into Jung’s theory. He posited the following:

1. Every individual has a “persona” they show the world (a constructed self) to feel like they belong. Underneath this persona, everyone has a personal “shadow,” or the part of themselves they don’t want to acknowledge. This shadow is always projected onto others— every negative thought we have about someone else is a product of our own unintegrated shadow. Note: The shadow is NOT bad, it just “is.” It’s actually there to HELP us grow and integrate all the unhealed parts of us.

2. Individuals’ shadows are usually part of their unconscious, meaning most people are not aware of their shadow side or cannot bear to delve into their trauma/darkness and begin to heal it.

3. All of human consciousness is CONNECTED. This means two things. 1: There is a “collective unconsciousness” that contains the sum of all of our unintegrated trauma, and 2: We can heal our collective unconsciousness by healing our own unconsciousness.

How do we heal our own unconsciousness? By becoming AWARE of our shadow side, accepting and forgiving the conditioning that created it, and working to encourage others to do the same.

What— or rather, who— does that remind you of?

Also— great use of lighting here.

We know Vecna has direct access to his victims’ consciousness; not just their memories, cognition, and emotions, but also their awareness itself. This is how he’s able to target and trance people. But it’s not just their consciousness Vecna has access to; it’s their unconsciousness. Their shadow. Their trauma. Yes, he has psionic abilities akin to El’s, but as far as we know, El can’t access the collective unconsciousness like Vecna can. She is only capable of “remote viewing” via the void or piggybacking into people’s minds. So why is Vecna capable of this?

If you want my take on it: the only way to access a collective shadow would be through accessing your own shadow. So is Vecna really Henry, or his unintegrated shadow? And is either really condemnable, considering the larger themes of the show?

We see this theme of non-dualism echoed in Brenner’s NINA pep talk with El:

It’s fascinating to me that they’re communicating these bigger thematic ideas through the show’s “villians”— while the above conversation could be taken at surface-level as Brenner being manipulative, it’s important to acknowledge the truth of what he’s saying. NINA is only successful because El faces “the good and the bad.” This is why “hiding in the light” is a no-go for Max.

Focusing only on happy memories is a form of emotional bypassing. Throughout the show, we’ve been told time and again that hiding doesn’t work. Neither does running away. The only way out for our characters is through their own shadows.

Now, the fun part: predictions. Looking at all of this with a Jungian lens, it doesn’t make much sense to villianize a character or to end the story by “defeating evil.” In non-dual theory, there are no evil people, only unhealed ones.

We know what worked for our characters temporarily (Will in the UD, Max in her first trance, El using her powers against Vecna) was the memory and vibration of love.

This reminded me of A Wrinkle In Time, which is a science fiction novel that’s been noted more than a few times as one of Stranger Things’ primary influences. In the book, a girl and her brother travel through time to rescue their father from an alternate dimension where all beings are controlled in a hyper-individualist suburbia by a giant, all-knowing brain. The climactic “defeat” of the brain is shockingly simple, but incredible impactful— Meg, the heroine, tells it over and over that she loves it. This love ultimately brings her father and brother out of trances they are in, and they’re able to remember her and travel back home.

(Tangent: And God. The implications of that, outside of analyzing ST, are powerful. How do we live in a capitalist hellscape that is so caught up in the mind— in acheiving, obtaining, securing, protecting the ego— that many of us have forgotten our hearts? The answer is love. Loving ourselves more deeply to love all beings more deeply, “the good and the bad.” But love does not negate accountability, and it does not excuse harm.)

Our characters are all struggling with self-acceptance and self-love in some form or another. Each is wrestling with secrets and lies, and the desire to hide parts of themselves they think others can’t accept.

Mike is clearly struggling with self-loathing, guilt surrounding what happened to El in s1, and a crippling hero complex.

Will is also on the self-loathing train, continually self-sacrifices to his own detriment, and is hiding his identity out of fear (not at all villifying that, just for the record.)

El struggled to reconcile her abilities and forced weaponization with her identity outside of the lab pre-s4.

Max was suicidal and had a lot of self-hatred after B*lly’s death.

Nancy parallels Mike in her survivor’s guilt post-s1 and exhibits the same lack of self-preservation and self-sacrificing tendencies.

You get my point. So how will these characters overcome their trauma? Not through hiding, or running, or bypassing. Not through the light alone. Through love— acknowledgement of their own darkness, compassion for the unhealed nature of others, and commitment to being honest with themselves and their loved ones. We know Will is El and Henry’s mirror/foil and will play a central role in S5, and with all of this in mind I think it’s safe to say he will break the cycle of bypassing and hiding from trauma and pain once and for all. He won’t fight it like El, hide from it like Max, or run from it like he did as a kid.

Only by integrating their shadows can our characters become truly “themselves,” or as Brenner puts it, “whole.”

I will probably have much more to say about this after my re-read of A Wrinkle in Time, but for now, that’s all I’ve got. :) Hope everyone is doing well!

[songoftrillium]

Likes don’t increase visibility to others! Please reblog this to spread the word! 

I think Werewolf is an inherently queer medium

This is all a part of a larger long-term project.

I am trying to hold the World of Darkness to higher standards of inclusivity.

Book 1: Cliath

Meet The Gaians — a chosen people blessed by Gaia of whom among them there are heroes who are born, blessed with the power to Change. They have been charged with the duty of protecting her and her brood, and among them are fellowships from every culture. They are largely comprised of Kinfolk. Vanguards of the earth, they follow the Codes and Creeds of renown in chiminage to the spirits in exchange for favor, protection, and power to strengthen their Fellowships and they form one of several primary factions.

A small number of Gaia’s chosen have been gifted the ability to shapeshift through either bite or birth into animals; warriors joining the fight against the Wyrm. The Gaians have many secret names for these shapeshifters between their cultures, and they range across many animal species and tribes, but the most common among them in these times are Garou.

This sourcebook includes information on First Changes, Rites of Passage, how people become werewolves, and what they're fighting for. Book 1 is effectively a players guide, including enough comprehensive character creation rules for people to create rank 1 Garou.

The World of Darkness is implied to exist just beneath a facade that all others take for granted as simply being a world gone wrong. When the Change happens to a Garou, human or otherwise, the world they once knew ceases to be. The Apocalypse is said to be something happening to everything, everywhere, simultaneously, and on every level. This transcends the concept of everything succumbing to a singular event but many small ones.

In many ways, the Garou themselves are emblematic of this Apocalypse, with these former lives ending and sweeping the cub into something far bigger than themselves. A Call To Action is the theme of Book 1.

Book 1: Cliath goes into warborn, bitten, wolf-born, and human-born lives leading up to the change. It presents a curated depiction of the Garou from the perspective of those who would mentor them. There are not a lot of conflicts, profound lore, or politics so much as 'this is what we are, this is what we do.' Functionally, this can be considered a Players’ Guide, containing your attributes, abilities, advantages, and Merits and Flaws. Gifts and rites will be truncated to rank 1 for the most part. Guidelines for new STs will be found here, including enough powers and enemy stats to keep their troupe of players on their toes. This will also include things like chargen and descriptions of attributes, abilities, and advantages. This will also have many details on packs and the importance of one's packmates. And what better way to introduce new players than to have it happen in an all-new setting for storytellers to introduce their players to the game: the first three chapters of Dead Mountain!

Dead Mountain isn't going anywhere. In fact, it will be used as the foundation for this series. Already-finished parts of the Dead Mountain will be released over the next few months, and a delayed release of the full chronicle will come next spring. The scope of Werewolf: the Essentials will strongly diverge from past game traditions. In past core books and settings, there was an intent to showcase the world at large, written from the perspective of people who had never been to these places. In the end, many details were laughably wrong or mediocre representations that didn’t appeal to the groups they represented. We want the World of Darkness to be HUGE. So, we will be laser-focusing this project to represent the Garou from the Pacific Northwest as an example, with guidelines on how to make your own World of Darkness at your locale HUGE too!

CALLING ALL CHARACHS!

We cannot make this happen without your help.  We are putting out the call for folx from all parts of the queer, lesbian, trans, bisexual, gay, and asexual werewolf fandom looking to help make this the best possible release we can:

Artists

Horror writers

Editors

Consultants

Hype Wolves to help spread the word

Indie TTRPG creators

Working together, we can create a game that is fun, engaging, and genuinely representative of the diverse community of players and fans who love Werewolf. To help us out, click here We look forward to providing you future updates!

UPDATE: Our team has grown huge, and we're grateful to the fandom for rising up and howling with us! We received far more applications than we were able to fully process, but we promise to deliver you the best possible Sourcebook anthology we can! Meet the Writing Team Meet the Art Team Follow our official account for future announcements! To check out a book preview and help us hire cultural consultants click here

Social Media Shout-out! I offer my thanks to @peltofash and @a-boros-named-seamus for supporting me on the Adren and Athro tiers! Your contributions are directly helping make this game more inclusive!

[gatheredfates]

Hi! My name is Sea, and I like to collect things. 🌿

Specifically, as of February this year, I have made it my mission to collect as many resources for the Final Fantasy community as I can; including, but not limited to: Communities, Events, Free Companies, How-To Guides, Lore, Tools and more! I have compiled them into Sea's Community Compendium for FFXIV Creatives, a venture I hope will service as a directory for new and old FFXIV players alike to find places and things they might not otherwise know about, and I'm proud to say that the Compendium has over a hundred individual entries!

...But I want more.

Specifically, as much as this is a call to introduce new people to the Compendium, it is a call for anyone who might know of specific resources/communities that not in the document to take a moment's time out of their day to let me know about them. You can submit specific resources via:

My tumblr dm's.

This handy google form.

Or SEAFLOOR, my support and social community for the Compendium and adjacent projects.

You do not need to be a resource/server owner to submit; there just needs to be a publicly accessible link. ✨

Projects like mine equally cannot survive without the support of the community. If you like what I do, please reblog this post or share it with your friends; post it in your community servers or link it on your social media(s). The more visibility I get, the larger the Compendium becomes and the more likely you are to find a resource or community to suit your needs.

Okay, but really, Is my space suitable for the Compendium? Most of the time, yes! Below the read more is some more information/stipulations. This is all publicly available on the document.

Below are the following things I do not accept on the Compendium:

Personal/Single-Character LFC ads. (Though these get posted to the SEAFLOOR Tumblr Community when I find them!)

Content intended for or can be used for bullying, harassment and OOC gossip. E.g. ‘Secrets’ blogs, receipts, callout posts, etc. This does not include IC tabloid blogs or other ventures used to generate roleplay.

Communities that do not have an RP/writing element (large-scale exempt).

Anything I find personally distasteful or goes against the spirit of this project.

Common-sense rule applies.

I want to put my community on the Compendium but we have an application process. Is this okay?

Yes! Just note somewhere in your application that's a requirement. The only thing that is mandatory for the Compendium is that you must be open to new members or have a public-facing/accessible facet. There's no point advertising a community if no one can join it in some way!

I want to put my Community on the compendium but I only have x number of members —

Also totally okay! People don't start with large communities. Activity is a must but, whether your server has two or two thousand members, if you're looking for new people to join, I'd love to help you find people.

I want to put my community/resource on the Compendium but I worry its too niche?

Okay, and? If your Eorzean Fishing Alliance has four members but you roleplay every second weekend, I still want to know about it. The same goes for resources; if it's relevant to the game, it'll be useful to someone.

How active does a community need to be?

If you find a community has not been active in about two/three months, send me a message and I'll take a look at it. Communities have ebbs and flows, especially event spaces that may take hiatuses depending on member interest/life events. I'm not strict in my implementation provided a space isn't dead. If a link or anything is broken, contact me asap!

I have [insert a question not stated here]?

No drama! Send me an ask or use the #Compendium channel in my Discord!

[and-her-saints]

Hey sorry idk if you'd know this but I quite literally don't know where to turn about this so I'm sending this ask to every queer+catholic blog I can find

Are there *any* resources out there for queer/trans Catholics that go beyond affirmation and show how to pursue a religious life that goes beyond the laity (e.g. priesthood, joining a convent/monastery, something similar) without having to brush your queerness aside. I feel like if I don't find something soon I might go insane

years ago, i attended a Zoom event with Fr. James Alison as a keynote speaker, and something he said has been glued to my brain ever since. he said it in Spanish, so i'll try to remember, paraphrase and translate: "while they try to get us to stop being queer, what we must try to do is to be better queers."

i love what you said about "beyond affirmation" and that is precisely why i got reminded of the quote and WHY this quote resonated with me to begin with.

imho, there is a fundamental issue with a lot of queer theology and it's that it doesn't go beyond apologetics. it's not pragmatic nor does it seem to engage critically with the material conditions that work with or against queerness. and it's truly such a shame, because living "religiously" to me, as a queer catholic, it's infinitely more a matter of coherence, love, devotion and solidarity, than learning how to "reconcile" gayness/transness with the Bible.

it's a journey, of course. the apologetics were and are necessary for many of us to unlearn the hatred that might've been instilled in us through religious education and upbringing. however, here are some resources that, in my opinion, show how to pursue queer-religious-life.

💌 catholic/christian resources:

[book] The Reckless Way of Love: Notes on Following Jesus by Dorothy Day. Unlike larger collections and biographies, which cover her radical views, exceptional deeds, and amazing life story, this book focuses on a more personal dimension of her life: Where did she receive strength to stay true to her God-given calling despite her own doubts and inadequacies and the demands of an activist life? What was the unquenchable wellspring of her deep faith and her love for humanity?

[book & account] Black Liturgies: Prayers, Poems, and Meditations for Staying Human by Cole Arthur Riley. Black Liturgies is a digital project that connects spiritual practice with Black emotion, Black memory, and the Black body. In this book, she brings together hundreds of new prayers, along with letters, poems, meditation questions, breath practices, scriptures, and the writings of Black literary ancestors to offer forty-three liturgies that can be practiced individually or as a community.

[book] Cry of the Earth, Cry of the Poor by Leonardo Boff. Focusing on the threated Amazon of his native Brazil, Boff traces the economic and metaphysical ties that bind the fate of the rain forests with the fate of the indigenous peoples and the poor of the land. He shows how liberation theology must join with ecology in reclaiming the dignity of the earth and our sense of a common community, part of God's creation. To illustrate the possibilities, Boff turns to resources in Christian spirituality both ancient and modern, from the vision of St. Francis of Assisi to cosmic christology.

[book] Undoing Theology: Life Stories from Non-normative Christians by Chris Greenough. The fundamental issue with ‘queer’ research is it cannot exist in any definable form, as the purpose of queer is to disrupt and disturb. Undoing Doing generates a process of ‘undoing’ as central to queer research enquiries. Aiming to engage in a process which breaks free from traditional academic norms, the text explores three life stories

[podcast] The Magnificast. "A weekly podcast about Christianity and leftist politics. The Magnificast is hosted by Dean Dettloff and Matt Bernico. Each week's episode focuses on a unique or under-realized aspect of territory between Christianity and politics that no one taught you about in sunday school."

💌 non-christian but still excellent resources:

[book] Hijab Butch Blues by Lamya H. A memoir by a butch hijabi that follows the experiences of the author through stories and figures from the Qur'an.

[book] Lean on Me: A Politics of Radical Care by Lynne Segal. Questions of care, intimacy, education, meaningful work, and social engagement lie at the core of our ability to understand the world and its possibilities for human flourishing. In Lean On Me feminist thinker Lynne Segal goes in search of hope in her own life and in the world around her. She finds it entwined in our intimate commitments to each other and our shared collective endeavours.

i don't think these are precisely what you were looking for. but i hope these resources bring you as much peace and hope as they have brought me.

[midnight-melancholiaaa]

‘what the fuck was up with that first sol and mae conversation’ - an acolyte ep6 theory/analysis post

I think the start of this episode unfortunately put to bed the theories that Sol was aware of Mae’s identity and baited her onto the ship. So that got me thinking — at what point in the conversation did Sol realise he wasn’t speaking to Osha? What tipped him off? And, generally, what the fuck was that conversation??? Sol??? Hello?????

I think all of this can be explained, and the layers of their conversation peeled back in an interesting way, if Sol realised Mae’s identity earlier than I’d first assumed. I now think a few flags early in the conversation tipped him off, and a lot of his later lines are his response to Mae clearly projecting her own feelings onto “Osha”.

Theory/analysis below the cut!

First off, Mae’s lines and behaviour when she emerges from the engine room are dispassionate in a way we don’t expect from Osha. There’s an argument that this could look to Sol like someone numb with grief and putting on a functional face, but I’m going to list this as Red Flag Number 1. When she asks Sol what’s up with him, she sounds more confused and curious than she does concerned, again not something that tracks as Osha.

However, I think the red flag that dooms Mae is in the following exchange.

“How could I not have sensed that villain’s true intentions when we first met him on Olega”

“I think when you really want something, it can cloud your mind” (Sol looks up) “You see what you want to see. He fooled us all.”

These are some JUICY lines. We’re clearly encouraged to think of their pertinence to Sol, and the Order’s current ignorance of the dark side threat, as well as Sol’s own personal blinders with the Brendok mystery. But this is also the first time we see something key for the rest of this conversation - Mae blatantly projecting her own feelings onto half-hearted mimicry of what she assumes Osha might say.

In her projection, she expresses her own frustration at being misled by the Master, at wanting to believe his structure for Mae’s revenge against the jedi, and hence his shaping of Mae’s life path, was meaningful. I’ve seen Osha’s loneliness discussed a lot by the fandom, but Mae is winning a gold medal in the loneliness contest. She’s spent 16 years desperately searching for someone who understands her in the way she thought Osha did, and whatever kinship she hoped the Master had for her has just shattered. This adds another layer to her too-casual reaction to Sol’s grief. She doesn’t expect a Jedi to feel such love for their padawan, not just because she views the Jedi as dispassionate (which we’ll come back to later), but because her master never felt that way about her. In all these lines, Mae’s betrayal comes across beautifully.

But the mimicry of Osha? Mae failgirls that one. We know Osha to be a straightforward, direct person, rather than someone to speak in riddles, or spout superficially Jedi-style wisdoms with a distinctly-Mae core of cynicism.

This touches on another repeated theme of this scene — Mae clearly doesn’t understand how Osha feels about the Jedi, in a way that speaks to larger issues with understanding her sister as a person separate from herself, with different thought processes and values. When Mae speaks as Osha, it’s hard to tell what’s Mae speaking directly as herself, or Mae as how she thinks Osha thinks, but there isn’t much difference between those two — Mae assumes Osha reacts to situations as Mae would, treating her as a half of the same whole.

Feel free to skip this tangent if you’re just here for the Sol theory!!!!

I think it goes beyond not understanding Osha’s point of view — as the lovely @animazi put it, it’s as if Mae cannot conceive of Osha being a person outside their sisterly relationship and Mae’s coven-derived identity. It’s a complete disconnect of empathy, in that it doesn’t occur to Mae that she should try to empathise.

Mae wants to believe that they are fundamentally the same person. “You see what you want to see.” Mae wants to believe the only reason she and Osha are different is because one has been “corrupted” by the Jedi. She recognises that outside influences and different formative experiences have torn her apart from her sister, but she wants to believe that if Osha was plucked away from the Jedi, if she was taught rather than corrupted (haha I love this episode title), if she knew the ‘truth’ about Brendok, they could revert to a perfect sisterly harmony. A harmony based on Mae’s conception of them.

So of COURSE she doesn’t try to empathise with Osha’s current way of seeing, when she views it as both temporary and fixable, corrupted and false. Mae believes that, as soon as the falsehoods are stripped away, Osha will be herself again, in that Osha will be Mae. Mae believes Osha is simply Mae under a fragile Jedi veneer, explaining why so many of her lines in this scene are essentially Mae talking, with a half-hearted Osha bent.

Apologies for that detour, back to the scene. It’s very striking to me how Sol looks up for the first time in the middle of Mae’s mini-speech. There’s many interpretations for this look, yes, and you could argue he’s having a crisis about the Sol-related clouded vision stuff I mentioned earlier.

But he seems confused, almost frightened, and then the camera comes back to him after Mae finishes, and I think this is the moment.

Please look at these shots and tell me that’s not the face of someone for whom a thousand things have just clicked into place. We see him harden into some new realisation, and then…

“You found him.” (meaningful pause) “Your PIP droid.”

This line is such a non-sequitur that it’s actually what drove me to take another look at this scene. I assumed it was some janky prequel-esque dialogue, but now I’m not so sure. Saying “you found him” so soon after some ominous looks from Sol and the discussion of Qimir could, at the very least, be a nod to Mae’s role in everyone’s brush with the dark side. But, even then, Sol’s deflection to the droid doesn’t make full sense. And then I thought ‘oh shit’…………

After rewatching Episode 5, I’m convinced that Sol is aware PIP was sacrificed and really should not be back with “Osha”. For somebody afraid and grieving and running for their life to calmly find and fix their droid is… not Osha. It’s as if Sol raises the incriminating subject right after his realisation, just to confirm it to himself. And Mae, though slightly nervous, hands him that confirmation on a platter.

To bring back the clouded judgement line again, Sol was blinded. He wanted to have saved Osha, because he could not save anyone else. He wanted to have not failed Osha for the third time. Brendok, leaving the Order, now. It’s Sol in that room, looking at the holo. He wanted to have learned from his mistakes.

But now he knows it is NOT Osha, and the conversation gets 5000% more interesting. To me, his next few lines are gently testing Mae, playing along to see if he can evoke a reaction or a slip from her — if she’ll come clean or double down into the lie. It’s fascinating the way he’s half addressing a hypothetical Osha, and half addressing Mae.

So, first the droid lines, to see if Mae notices her mistake, and then…

“I noticed the way you take care of him, talk to him, love him. Even though he is just a machine.”

This seems like something meant for Osha. It’s something Mae would expect of her sister’s overabundance of compassion, and so something that won’t make her suspicious. But I think the implication of Osha’s loneliness is deliberate, in that we know Mae is also deeply lonely and searching for connection in places it isn’t reciprocated. Down to you if you think the machine allegory is in reference to Mae’s master, and what that might say about Sol’s view of Qimir, or if this is a more take-it-as-written line, but I think it still emotionally resonates with Mae even if she doesn’t want it to. Her expression in this pause does seem to imply as much.

At the end of this speech, Sol moves into that area of shadowy lighting, which I WILL discuss later.

Mae’s response, “I’ve always been like that. Even when I was little,” is also very telling. It’s her reminiscence of child Osha, as loving the small things, and having more reservations about… force-manipulating space hummingbirds? But, with Sol’s double meaning, this line is true of Mae too. Mae’s tendency to love clingily, desperately, in ways that aren’t “appropriate”, as we see in flashback Mae’s attempts to make her sister stay.

And then Sol’s response, a simple “I know”, fits this double conversation too. There’s a parental exhaustion, a heartache for his padawan, and his own (involuntary?) empathy for Mae, the abandoned sister. I think this’ll hit even harder once we know what happened on Brendok — Sol clearly knows more about Mae than he ‘should’.

The pause after this feels heavy, tense, even disappointed. Sol knows that Mae’s resigned to the act. With all this context and lead-up, Sol’s cagey behaviour in the last part of this scene now makes SO much more sense to me.

“I had to lose a lot of myself in order to become a Jedi. Even if I didn’t know it at the time.”

I think this is said to provoke Sol into guilt, but speaks to Mae’s false conceptions of the Jedi, and they way they approach love — she assumes Osha must have had to lose her compassion. More importantly, this shows Mae still does not understand Osha’s motivations for joining the Jedi, and remains emotionally raw about it. How could her “compassionate” sister choose to leave the family who loved her? How could she abandon Mae if the Jedi had not “corrupted” her, had not taken that compassion and loyalty away?

She wants to believe in the Jedi as a stealing, malign influence, because she wants to attribute Osha’s departure to anything other than the fact that Osha and Mae are, at their core, different people. In believing they are the same, Mae still cannot fathom why Osha would choose to lose their family, their coven, their grander destiny, and above all their sisterhood, because this is something Mae would never choose. So of course Mae does not see what Osha loved about the Jedi, of course Mae views the Jedi as merely an agent of loss. A false dream that she must “kill” to bring Osha back to her.

(And this is without even going into whatever the hell the Jedi did on Brendok!)

“I’m sorry if you feel that way.”

All this contextualises Sol’s cagey almost-apology. His body language is SO closed off and suspicious. I don’t think he’s even pretending to speak to Osha at this point — this is directly to Mae. He loves his padawan and supports her decision to join the Order, but regrets the collateral of that decision — a decision he still views as right.

I think that explains a lot about his reaction. He freezes up in the face of Mae’s depth of feeling, and is caught between his empathy and his loyalty to Osha. I’ll agree this is NOT the way to apologise to someone, but what he says is true to Sol — he’s not sorry Osha made the choice she did. But he’s sorry that Mae feels this way, has processed her loss the way she has. The reveal of what happened on Brendok will finalise what level of dickish this is, but it is at least LESS dickish than him saying this to Osha 😭

“How could I feel any other way” is exactly what I’ve said earlier. Mae cannot fathom how Osha could feel any differently than Mae does.

And Sol avoids her eyes and sighs. I think it’s a mixture of regret, of resignation, and of still struggling to confront his own mistakes. That avoidance comes through in the final part of their conversation — a part I’m still struggling to unpack, though I think next week will reveal all.

We’ve seen Sol make several insistences that he’d tell Osha the truth about Brendok, and even this episode we see him prepared to tell the council. So his avoidance now is intriguing. You could argue that he was always going to quail from telling Osha, the way he kept promising it and then delaying it, but I think there’s something else going on.

I think now he knows it’s Mae, the person most damaged by his actions on Brendok, he falters. Aside from Mae’s specific victimhood, there’s also a difference between facing up to someone you trust and hope will have sympathy for you, and facing up to someone who’s just shown how wedded she is to her own way of seeing. The realisation that this is Mae has come so suddenly that in this moment he freezes and avoids. His coldness here is also notable — you could almost think that he resents Mae a little, for ruining this moment that was supposed to be Osha’s.

But is he really doing this for Osha? Did he want Osha to know for her own sake now she’s an adult and the protection excuse is wearing thin, or did he want to seek absolution from her? Is he hoping for a level of forgiveness that he cannot get from Mae? I guess we’ll find out next week…….

A few more notes on Sol before I finish…

Yes this is finally about the shadow thing. My first reaction to this was “hey leslye, what the fuck, OW.” Aside from the classic symbolism of a character stepping into shadow, this specific barred shadow is super reminiscent of the scene where Anakin speaks to Yoda in Revenge of The Sith. Given the topic of that conversation was about fear, passion and anger as paths to the dark side, a topic that Qimir also brings up this episode, I don’t think this is coincidental.

That said, I don’t think the shadows are straightforward Sol-will-fall symbolism. I think they’re emblematic of the emotions he’s struggling with as soon as he realises Mae’s identity. Fear, of the consequences Mae represents more than any other person. Defensiveness from her anger at him and her challenges to his worldview (and, lest we forget, the fact that she could still try to harm him). Perhaps some anger towards HER, for taking Osha, and this moment with Osha as he’d envisioned it, away from him. Anger for her role in the deaths of the other Jedi, at himself for the role HE had in creating Mae’s revenge. But, warring with these darker impulses, also regret, pity, sorrow for his padawan’s sister. That final remorse, in the way his face just slightly changes before the lights come up and the shadows disappear. Such symbolism Leslye I am eating the walls.

Don’t get me wrong, Sol is a man on the edge and I’m excited (afraid?) to see which way the narrative takes him. I think he’s written deliberately enigmatic this episode, and his later scenes will make more sense next week. I have no idea why he switched off his comms and hyperspace jumped instead of facing up to the council. Well, that’s a lie, I have a few ideas…

The scene of Mae in restraints is also ambiguous, though I think it links back to Sol’s surprise at Mae’s identity, and initial freezing up when he realises he’s lost control of the Brendok-reveal. That final scene is him grasping for control back, to control some of his fears and put him in a (metanarrative) place where he feels able to monologue on his own terms next episode. I actually have a lot more thoughts on this scene, and the hyperspace jump, AND some predictions for next week, but they won’t fit in this post. Here [part 2] they are instead!

We’re absolutely meant to doubt Sol this episode. I think Teach/Corrupt is, like much of Episode 6, a title of deliberate double meaning. But I’m also struck by the fear and sorrow in his face in that lovely shot where he shoots Mae through the doorway. His fond, regretful tone of voice in “Oh, Mae…” Not to be Star Wars cliche, but I suspect the good in Sol will win out. If it doesn’t then that’s a heartbreaking twist and I’ll probably throw myself into the ocean!

Either way, this is an episodic mystery show and, much as I can unpick some of Sol and Mae’s behaviour, we’ll only know the full story with hindsight. Here’s to hoping at least some of my theory holds up, and thank you for reading!!!!!!

The Sol Patrol shall forge bravely (and perhaps delusionally) onwards! <3

[genericruleroftheflies]

I’ve thought about it a little and I think Misaki has OCD. I’m not expert I just have my OCD experience to go off of so maybe I’m projecting but...

Disclaimer: I have gone to therapy for OCD but I’m not a therapist or anything so take what I say with a grain of salt I’m just reading into a fictional character.

To me, Misaki shows some more obvious traits of OCD, aka the kind people are typically familiar with, cleaning and organizing. And while he does the cooking and cleaning as part of his rent to live in Usagi’s house, there’s an extra/mini/preview where before they live together Misaki needs to clean Usagi’s house before he can start to study for his entrance exams. So while I believe Misaki does actually like to cleaning, cook, and organize all are things he does a bit compulsively.

He cannot begin to think about studying until Usagi’s house is clean… and he’s made him food and dessert for the next week!

My point is that this reads as more “obsessively cooks and cleans for comfort when he’s stressed out” rather than just cooks and cleans because it’s covering rent. Also because we know Usagi doesn’t give af about money or Misaki paying rent.

And I think it’s of note that cooking and clean is what Misaki starts to do as a child after his parents die and his brother is work all day every day.

This ties into what I think is another *possible* OCD type or OCD signs that Misaki shows. While I think it’s written like he has misplaced guilt over his parent’s death because he feels like it was his fault… I do think it’s possible those play hand in hand.

Misaki doesn’t want to ever be trouble to anyone or ask for anything, because he fears if he does it could lead to someone being hurt. To me, that kind of sounds like Harm OCD.

But I could understand if someone says it’s more like survivors guilt than OCD.

Harm OCD I believe like many pure O (obsession without physical compulsion) OCD types deals with intrusive thoughts in this case thoughts of harming others.

If I was to describe it in Misaki’s case it wouldn’t be that he would harm others so directly but his thought process is like “if I bother this person with my wants—> they will die” or at the very least “they will be troubled” and that in itself to me is quite an intrusive, OCD thought. (But I myself do not struggle so specifically with harm OCD at least it’s not my main problem… but pure O in general, yes.)

Misaki gets this from the belief that his parents died because he asked them to hurry home.

This not wanting to trouble people is like the main through line of Misaki’s character, in continues throughout the manga.

I would even say his main internal conflict (after initially getting together with Usagi) is between wanting not to trouble people vs being selfish. And it’s wanting to be with Usagi that makes him actually push back on this tendency of his. Tendency… maybe coping mechanism…

(This is when he is telling his brother about Usagi in act 52)

All this to say, Misaki may obsessively cook and clean as well as obsessively avoid doing anything that could cause anyone trouble in an attempt to relieve his intrusive thoughts. In the end, doing stuff like that doesn’t actually help it’s only a temporary coping mechanism to a larger issue so it’s good that Misaki comes to be more selfish in his relationship with Usagi. He can no longer just be avoidant. He must face his fears (exposure therapy anyone?) and see it’s not so bad when he does the thing he fears.

I’d also just like to add this moment where Misaki’s freaking out and then Usagi is like “The new ribbon came for Suzuki” and Misaki is like “you change it then!” But then Misaki goes to change it. I totally read that as Usagi purposefully was like it’s okay babe here’s a little task you can do to calm down (because he smirks after mentioning it). Overall, Usagi is just really good at reading Misaki the more the manga goes on (though he is an idiot sometimes)

I do think one could also touch on sexuality OCD with Misaki but I don’t really want to as I believe the OCD comes from intrusive thoughts, those being thoughts you don’t secretly desire but actually fear and strongly don’t want to happen, so I wouldn’t want to say Misaki has OCD around being gay because by the mid point he is saying “I don’t think we are doing anything to be ashamed of” about him and Usagi. But I would say early on he has some internalized homophobia for sure.

In conclusion, this is a long winded analysis of Misaki maybe having OCD. Hopefully it wasn’t problematic! Again I’m not an expert on any of this it’s only come from what I know about it with my own experiences.

[amaryllidae]

ive always wanted to do a small rewrite of su and while i doubt ill ever be able to finish it, heres some notes abt it (blue diamond + diamond related) every diamond is six-fingered. blue’s powers are more tied to water now, and she has control over it. after pink’s shattering she sheds tons of gargantuan tears that wind up flooding palaces and displacing buildings. her emotions can produce any sort of intense aura that projects it onto other gems, it just so happens the only feeling blue cannot control is her intense grief over pink. sometimes, blue has grieved so much on earth during visits as to cause tsunamis she has no footsteps or feet. she glides over the ground and swims like a mermaid underwater, and manuvers the ocean with ease homeworld prime (the homeworld we see in su) belongs to white diamond and her gems, primarily focusing on technology and advancement.  homeworld, pictured, belongs to blue and yellow. during era 1 everyone lived on homeworld but with era 2 blue’s powers became erratic with her emotional instability and after one mess too many was banned from homeworld prime. yellow decided to go with her, forming a half-and-half homeworld planet where blue’s half is submerged, and yellow’s is a metropolis. homeworld is large, but the gem empire is larger, and so only important gems and their attendants are present on-planet.

over the years blue’s tears have tainted her underwater colony, granting her closest gems immunity to her emotional aura when it gets out of control. this also helps her gems focus on being the diplomats many of them are supposed to be.

[buildingrelationshipsinanarchy]

So,

I've been reflecting on some things. Polyamory and relationship anarchy, to practice them full depth, I believe, requires the cultivation of a lot of personal skills:

Patience, grace, emotional courage, honesty, openness, mindfulness, discipline, compassion and loving-kindness, to simply name a few.

As such, the prioritization of freedom in our language and value systems have become something I find short-sighted at best, self-decietful at worst.

While I value freedom in the sense of being able, and needing at times, to leave relationships, re/negotiate boundaries & agreements, and simply allow ourselves to change in whatever ways we individually need to without being beholden to things we can no longer fulfill.

Simultaneously, what self-respect can we have if we make agreements and then break them as our desires change? What accountability in relationships, romantic or otherwise, are we neglecting or disregarding if we let ourselves reach for more than we can hold with care and attention?

Love and loving aren't solo acts, they are collaborative projects, flawed, yet mutualistic bonds, challenging, though rewarding endeavors.

Unless your heart is shallow and your love empty, prioritizing individualistic pleasure seeking over understanding the weight and value of a multitude of deep, intimate bonds just makes you a timebomb for your network.

Intimacy, esp in our turbulent times, requires forgiveness and grace, patience and hopefulness, resilience and redemption, things that we as larger culture in the West have decided to throw away in order to hold onto mantras and ideologies of 'more ethical/radical than thou' and refuses to develop the self beyond it's obviously shortcomings by saying we're 'built different'.

At some point in time, our lives will all is to accept the imperfect, the less than fantasy, the 'needs some work', not out of pity or charity, but from an awareness that our love needs to learn how to evolve.

It is too easy to be black-pilled, esp with the world becoming more horrifying everyday, but letting ourselves become so separate and extreme in the wrong ways, will skill over into the places we seek to keep separate from the world that we hate.

As such, at some point, we, as lovers, ought to offer our hearts, souls, time to those we love, lest we cease to grow in the value of our own paths. We, at some point, ought to understand the richness that lay within us, as those who devoutly seek to be lovers, enjoyers, pleasers and caregivers.

If we have planted love like seeds, there should be much to receive in return, even doubly so the more challenging the intimate terrain of another's heart and world. If we seek pleasure as though it is life itself, we fail to value what the depth of our efforts can create in love.

Can you be dependable and considerate? Open while being emotionally courageous? Kind, while delivering challenging honesty? Forgiving when we ourselves or others make mistakes, do harm, or fail to navigate our collective brokenness?

Seeking love for the self says nothing about the love offer from the self into others. This is not some simple ethical issue where we assign blame and/or create conflict & distance. This is an issue of shaking oneself toward being a true lover of those who open their hearts, schedules, lives, and bodies for us to enjoy.

If we cannot give gratitude for that by offering ourselves to gold we've found and have been offered, what was the value of the freedom? To just consume another, for long or short, and just move on? There's no love in that.