#but like i was not being overtly rude to them.

[jawsplitter]

girls i got my first "you're being very rude (no i wasn't) can i speak to your manager (you could not possibly pay my cheese-throwing door-dashing manager to care if i was being rude)"

luckily manager OBVIOUSLY dgaf and right after they left a lady came up and told me "i wanted to tell you i think you're doing just fine"

[buzzinrusso]

Disapproved love

You sat in the car outside the stadium, the keys dangling limply from the ignition. The hum of the world outside—distant chatter, the occasional roar of a car engine—felt muted, like it wasn’t real. Patri was inside with her teammates, probably laughing and joking about the game like they always did.

You wished you could be part of that world, but you knew better.

It wasn’t that you hadn’t tried. You’d spent months showing up to their dinners, cheering at their matches, and doing everything you could to blend in. But no matter what you did, you always felt like an outsider. Like you weren’t enough.

You reached into your bag and pulled out your sketchbook, flipping to the page where you’d drawn your latest Caitlyn cosplay design. The character had always been one of your favorites—strong, intelligent, and fiercely loyal. Everything you wanted to be but didn’t feel like.

Lately, even your cosplays couldn’t give you that spark of confidence they once did. How could they, when Patri’s teammates constantly made you feel small?

You clenched the sketchbook tighter, your chest aching with a mix of frustration and sadness. How much longer could you keep pretending it didn’t hurt?

--

It had started weeks ago, at another team dinner. You were seated beside Patri, the table filled with laughter and conversation. You’d thought, for once, that the evening was going well.

Then Claudia spoke.

“So, y/n,” she said, her tone sugary sweet in a way that set your nerves on edge. “How’s the... dress-up business going?”

You froze, heat creeping up your neck. “It’s not dress-up. I’m a cosplayer. I design and make costumes based on characters from games and shows.”

“Oh, right,” Claudia said, smirking. “And people actually pay you for that?”

“Claudia,” Patri warned, her voice low.

“What?” Claudia said, feigning innocence. “I’m just curious. It’s not exactly a real job, is it?”

Your stomach churned. You opened your mouth to respond, but the words caught in your throat.

“well, she works harder than most people I know,” Patri said, her jaw tight.

“Relax, Pat,” Mapi said, waving a hand dismissively. “She knows we’re joking.”

But they weren’t. You could feel the weight of their judgment pressing down on you, stealing the air from your lungs.

That night, you cried in the shower, letting the water mask your tears. Patri had held you afterward, whispering reassurances, but the damage was already done.

Another situation that made you feel bad was one night at a post match party / dinner.

It started as a faint unease. At first, you told yourself you were imagining things. Patri’s teammates weren’t outright rude; they never said anything overtly cruel to your face. But their disinterest in you was palpable, like an invisible wall you couldn’t break through no matter how hard you tried.

You began to notice the subtle ways they excluded you. At team dinners, the conversations would shift to inside jokes and stories you weren’t a part of. When you tried to contribute, they’d either politely nod or continue talking as if you hadn’t spoken.

Once, at a post-match party, you’d decided to wear one of your more subtle cosplay-inspired outfits. It was a casual homage to one of Caitlyn’s looks—just a hat, a sleek blazer, and a few accessories that hinted at the character without being over the top. You’d hoped it might spark a conversation, a way to connect with them.

But when you arrived, Claudia had smirked and whispered something to Alexia. The two of them burst into quiet laughter, their eyes darting toward you. You didn’t need to hear what they said to know it wasn’t kind.

“Nice hat,” Mapi had commented later, her tone dripping with sarcasm.

You forced a smile. “Thanks. It’s inspired by Caitlyn from Arcane.”

“Right,” Mapi said, raising an eyebrow. “The cartoon cop.”

“It’s not a cartoon,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady. “It’s an animated series with complex characters and a really compelling story.”

But she wasn’t listening. She’d already turned back to Claudia, dismissing you with a wave of her hand.

Patri had been on the other side of the room, deep in conversation with her coach. You didn’t want to interrupt, so you swallowed the lump in your throat and found a quiet corner to sit in for the rest of the night.

---

The little moments added up, chipping away at your confidence bit by bit.

One afternoon, you arrived early to pick up Patri after practice. You parked outside the training ground, scrolling through your phone while you waited. The windows were down, and you couldn’t help but overhear the conversation happening nearby.

“I don’t get it,” Claudia was saying. “What does Patri even see in her?”

“She’s pretty,” Cata offered, though her tone wasn’t particularly kind.

“Sure, but she’s not exactly... grounded, is she?” Claudia replied. “I mean, cosplaying? Who even does that for a living?”

You gripped the steering wheel, your knuckles turning white.

“She’s so clingy,” Alexia added. “Always hanging around like she belongs here.”

“She’s a distraction,” Mapi said bluntly. “Patri could do so much better.”

You sat frozen in the car, every word sinking into your skin like tiny barbs. They hadn’t even tried to lower their voices.

---

The worst part was that you couldn’t tell Patri. Not really.

How could you bring it up without making things harder for her? She already had enough on her plate with her demanding schedule, the pressure of the sport, and the endless scrutiny that came with being a professional athlete. You didn’t want to add to that burden.

So, you kept it to yourself.

You stopped wearing cosplay-inspired outfits to team events, opting for neutral, nondescript clothes instead. You avoided lingering at practices, making sure to arrive just as Patri was finishing up so you wouldn’t have to interact with her teammates.

You even started turning down invitations to post-match dinners, claiming you were busy with work. It wasn’t entirely a lie—you were busy. But you also couldn’t bear the thought of sitting through another evening of veiled insults and cold shoulders.

Patri noticed, of course.

“Are you okay?” she asked one night as the two of you lay in bed.

“Yeah,” you said, forcing a smile. “Just tired.”

She didn’t press, but you could see the worry in her eyes. It made you feel guilty, knowing she could sense your unhappiness but not knowing how to fix it without driving a wedge between her and her team.

---

The turning point came during one of your solo convention trips. You’d traveled to a city a few hours away to debut a new Caitlyn cosplay and another cosplay that you were really well known for on social media. The event had been a success—you’d won a craftsmanship award, taken dozens of photos with fans, and even made some new connections for future commissions.

But when you returned home, your excitement quickly faded.

Patri was sitting on the couch, her phone in hand. She looked up and smiled when you walked in, but the smile didn’t reach her eyes.

“Hey,” she said. “How was the convention?”

“It was great,” you said, trying to sound upbeat. “I won an award for the Caitlyn costume.”

“That’s amazing!” she said, standing to hug you.

But you couldn’t ignore the tension in her posture or the way her smile faltered when she pulled back.

“What’s wrong?” you asked, your heart sinking.

She hesitated, her hands fidgeting at her sides. “The team said some things today. About... us.”

You swallowed hard. “What kind of things?”

“They think I’m distracted,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “That I’m not focused enough on football because of our relationship.”

Her words hit you like a punch to the gut. You opened your mouth to respond, but no sound came out.

“I told them they were wrong,” she added quickly. “But... I don’t know, y/n. Maybe they’re right.”

The admission was like a knife to the chest. For weeks, you’d been trying to shield Patri from the negativity surrounding your relationship, but now it felt like you were the one dragging her down.

“Do you really think that?” you asked, your voice trembling.

She hesitated again, and that hesitation spoke louder than any words could.

That night, as you lay in bed staring at the ceiling, you couldn’t shake the feeling that you were losing her. And maybe—just maybe—it was your fault.

---

The coffee shop was warm and inviting, a stark contrast to the storm of emotions brewing inside you. You sat in a corner booth, nursing a lukewarm cappuccino as your two best friends, Jade and Anya, sat across from you. Both were fellow cosplayers and some of the few people who truly understood your world.

Jade leaned back in her chair, her vibrant pink wig catching the soft light. She was mid-way through perfecting her cosplay of Vi from Arcane and never missed an opportunity to stay in character. Anya, in contrast, was dressed casually, her blonde hair pulled back in a loose braid, but her energy was no less animated as she munched on a cookie.

“So, how’s Caitlyn coming along?” Anya asked, her tone bright.

You hesitated, twirling your spoon in the remnants of your coffee. “It’s done. I debuted it at a con last week.”

“And?” Jade pressed, her eyebrows lifting.

“I won a craftsmanship award,” you said with a faint smile.

“Hell yes, you did!” Jade cheered, clapping her hands together. “That costume is a masterpiece. You’re a genius with those details.”

“Thanks,” you said, the corners of your mouth twitching upward.

Anya narrowed her eyes, leaning forward. “Okay, what’s up? You should be glowing right now, but you look like someone just told you that jinx died.”

You sighed, your shoulders slumping. “It’s not about the cosplay. It’s... everything else.”

“Let me guess,” Jade said, crossing her arms. “The football team.”

You nodded, feeling the familiar sting of tears. “They hate me.”

“They don’t hate you,” Anya said gently, though her tone wasn’t entirely convincing.

“They do,” you insisted, your voice cracking. “They think I’m a joke. They think Patri deserves someone... better.”

Jade frowned, her expression darkening. “Better? Are they blind? You’re brilliant. You run your own business, you’re insanely talented, and you’re, like, one of the nicest people I know. What more do they want?”

“They want someone who fits into their world,” you said bitterly. “Someone who understands football and doesn’t make them look bad.”

“Make them look bad?” Anya repeated, her tone sharp. “How could you possibly—”

“They don’t take cosplaying seriously,” you interrupted, your words spilling out in a rush. “They think it’s childish or silly or not a real job. And because of that, they don’t take me seriously. They think I’m distracting Patri, and they keep telling her to break up with me.”

“Are you kidding me?” Jade said, her voice rising. “That’s so messed up. Does Patri know how awful they’re being?”

“She knows,” you admitted, staring down at your coffee. “But I don’t think she knows how much it’s affecting me. And the worst part is, I feel like they’re starting to get to her.”

“What do you mean?” Anya asked, concern etched on her face.

“She said they think she’s distracted,” you said, your voice trembling. “And that maybe they’re right. I don’t know... maybe she is better off without me.”

Jade slammed her hand on the table, making the cups rattle. “No. Don’t you dare go down that road, y/n. This isn’t about you not being enough—it’s about them being insecure and narrow-minded.”

Anya reached across the table, squeezing your hand. “Patri loves you. I’ve seen the way she looks at you, y/n. Don’t let them make you doubt that.”

You sniffled, trying to hold back the tears. “I just feel so... alone. I don’t belong in their world, and it’s like no matter what I do, I’ll never be good enough for them.”

“You don’t need to belong in their world,” Jade said fiercely. “You belong in your world. And if they can’t see how amazing you are, that’s their problem—not yours.”

“But what if Patri can’t keep fighting for me?” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

“She will,” Anya said with certainty. “She’s stronger than you think. And if she doesn’t fight for you, then she’s not the right one for you. But I don’t think that’s the case. She loves you, y/n. You just need to hold on and trust her.”

Jade leaned forward, her violet eyes blazing with determination. “And if those teammates of hers keep giving you grief, you let me know. I’ll show up in full Vi gear and scare the crap out of them.”

Despite yourself, you laughed. “Thanks, Jade. I’ll keep that in mind.”

Anya smiled softly. “You’re not alone, babes. You have us. And no matter what happens, we’ll always have your back.”

Their words were a balm to your wounded heart. For the first time in days, you felt a flicker of hope. Maybe things weren’t as hopeless as they seemed.

The comments didn’t stop after that. They just became quieter, more insidious.

“She’s so clingy,” you overheard Alexia say one evening when you arrived at the training ground to pick up Patri. “Always hanging around like a shadow.”

“She doesn’t get this life,” Cata had added. “She’s just going to hold Patri back.”

You bit your lip hard enough to draw blood, fighting the urge to storm over and defend yourself.

The worst part was that you could see how their words affected Patri. She became quieter around them whenever you were present, like she was caught in the middle of an invisible tug-of-war. And every time she chose not to speak up, it felt like another crack in your heart.

---

It all came to a head after one of Patri’s matches. The game had been brutal, and Patri was clearly frustrated as she walked toward the car. You waited for her with a tentative smile, hoping to offer some comfort.

But when she climbed into the passenger seat, her face was stormy.

“Hey,” you said softly. “Rough game?”

“Yeah,” she muttered, staring out the window.

The silence stretched between you as you drove, tension thick in the air. Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore.

“What’s wrong?” you asked.

“The team thinks I’m distracted,” she said, her voice tight.

“Distracted by what?” you asked, though deep down, you already knew.

She hesitated, and that hesitation shattered you. “By me,” you whispered.

Patri sighed, rubbing her temples. “They don’t understand, Cara. They think... they think I can’t balance my career and our relationship.”

The words hit you like a punch to the gut. Your hands tightened on the steering wheel as tears blurred your vision.

“Do you think that too?” you asked, your voice trembling.

“Of course not,” she said, but her tone lacked conviction.

The doubt in her voice cut deeper than anything her teammates had ever said. You felt your chest tighten, the weight of months of judgment and insecurity threatening to crush you.

“Maybe they’re right,” you said, the words spilling out before you could stop them. “Maybe you’d be better off without me.”

“Don’t say that,” Patri said, turning to look at you.

“Why not?” you snapped, your voice cracking. “It’s what they want, isn’t it? Maybe it’s what you want too.”

“That’s not true,” Patri said, but you couldn’t bring yourself to believe her.

You pulled the car over and buried your face in your hands, finally letting the tears fall. “I can’t keep doing this, Patri. I can’t keep feeling like I’m not good enough for you.”

---

The next morning, Patri arrived at the training ground with a fire in her eyes. She found her teammates in the locker room, laughing and chatting as if nothing was wrong.

“We need to talk,” she said, her voice sharp enough to cut through the noise.

The room fell silent as they turned to look at her.

“What’s up?” Mapi asked, frowning.

“It’s about y/n,” Patri said, crossing her arms. “I know what you’ve been saying about her. I’ve heard the comments, the whispers behind her back. And it stops now.”

“Patri, come on,” Claudia said, rolling her eyes. “We’re just looking out for you.”

“Looking out for me?” Patri repeated, her voice rising. “By tearing down the person I love? By making her feel like she’s not good enough? Do you have any idea how much you’ve hurt her?”

“She’s not cut out for this life,” Alexia said, her tone defensive.

“She’s cut out for more than any of you will ever understand,” Patri shot back. “Do you know how hard she works? The hours she spends perfecting every detail of her cosplays? The way she brings characters to life in a way no one else can? That takes more dedication than most people have.”

“She’s a distraction,” Claudia said stubbornly.

“No,” Patri said firmly. “She’s my anchor. And if you can’t respect her, then you don’t respect me.”

---

Later that day, you sat in your workshop, surrounded by the pieces of your many cosplays. The hat sat in your lap, its intricate embroidery, a testament to hours of painstaking work. But no matter how beautiful it was, it couldn’t fill the hollow ache inside you.

You were startled when the door opened, and Patri stepped inside.

“Hey,” she said softly, her eyes red like she’d been crying.

“Hey,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.

She sat beside you, taking your hands in hers. “I talked to them.”

Your heart skipped a beat. “You did?”

“They know how wrong they were,” she said, her voice filled with conviction. “I told them that if they can’t respect you, they don’t deserve to be part of my life.”

Tears welled up in your eyes as her words sank in. “You stood up for me?”

“Of course I did,” she said, pulling you into her arms. “You’re the most important person in my life, y/n. I’m so sorry I ever made you doubt that.”

For the first time in months, the weight on your chest began to lift.

---

In the weeks that followed, things started to change. Patri’s teammates made an effort to include you, to learn about your work and your passions. It wasn’t perfect, but it was a start.

And when you finally debuted your Caitlyn cosplay at a convention, Patri was there in the front row, cheering louder than anyone else.

As you posed for pictures, your eyes met hers, and for the first time in what felt like forever, you felt like you belonged

[bestlilithian]

The lilithian experience (lilith dominant chart)

Personal experiences w having heavy lilith influence

- Older people being creepy subtly or overtly, but usually subtly with certain looks or touches or comments, especially strangers in public or distant family friends

- Being told Im scary or intimidating, or that I look mean (a girl once told me she thought I wouldnt want to hang out w her and her friends because I looked 'too pretty and kinda mean') [this is esp w lilith/asc harsh aspects]

- Lilith square asc culture is walking into a room a little pissed or in a hurry and everyone shutting up (also works for mars/pluto)

- Now Ive never heard anyone else talking about this but as a lilithian woman Ive always been disgusted by the idea of having sex with a man because in our culture a woman who has sex w a man is seen as having been dominated and degraded by him ("I fucked her" "I hit that" "I scored") also the act itself is very power struggle-ish like no *I* want to bend over a man and make him suck *my* dick

- Being hyperaware of people looking at you (even if youre dressed extremely modestly or without makeup)

- Lilith/moon aspects 🤝 your mom making inappropriate comments about you and your body

- Lilith/sun aspects 🤝 your father insulting you or making weird comments (more subtle w soft aspects so you might brush it off but its still not okay girl)

- People thinking youre flirting with them or others (esp men) but youre just hot and talking, and you cant help that ppl have strong reactions to anything you say really

- Loving eye contact <3 (w the right people)

- Lilith square saturn culture is not being afraid to stand up to authority <3 and having to quite often because they have a pick on you and try to tear you down

- also w lilith square/opposite saturn grown ass adults will have beef w you when youre a kid, esp those w authority over you like teachers, coaches etc

- Lilith/asc harsh aspects and overthinking whether a fit is too revealing or not (because you dont want to get harassed and looked at again) (but then youll grt harassed even if you go out in a priests suit so 🤩)

- People (esp men) trying to use you for sex

- Always being the one guys want to be friends w benefits with while theyre crushing on another girl

- "I dont like what you do to me" - most men Ive interacted with for a while

- A guy told me he liked me for who I am but he couldnt stand "the effect I have on him"

- lilith in 4th house culture is attracting men w mommy issues and being looked at by guys in relationships

- lilith/mercury and needing to know all your friends bdsm test results

- People liking when youre mean 2 them

- People who hate you often want to have sex w you

- Ive had so many guys in my class literally have to gather up courage to talk 2 me, even for basic things like asking me to help w something, they approach me looking all tense and worked up like Ill slice their head off for asking me to help them with their math lmao

- A classmate (and friend, apparently) of my friend once didnt want to come out and meet me when I went to my friends school to give her something because she thought Id beat her up (for context I found out she said some nasty things to my friend and was not happy about it)

- Being told by ppl (esp men) that I remind them of characters who are villains

- People esp girls not liking me for no reason or being rude

- Guys in relationships being extremely cold and rude to me or even shittalking me to their gfs (you can guess why)

- People trying to 'put you in your place'

- Recognizing other lilithians immediately

- Being insecure about your private parts, your body in general and your appearance

- Sex obsession since a young age

- Sexual harassment unfortunately

[ohnoitstbskyen]

... y'all know Lae'zel is acting scared, right?

Video transcription: I've seen a lot of comments on my short about Lae'zel dismissing her entire character because she's mean and… I'm just checking in here… you guys know she's scared, right? She's terrified. She was kidnapped by the worst monster she knows, infected with the most horrifying death anyone in her culture can have, and then stranded on a hostile world, alone, with nothing to guide her except the dogmatic military cult indoctrination of a cruel lich demigod, telling her that her only hope of salvation is to follow Gith doctrine with total unyielding faith. And still she tries to save you. When she keeps insisting that you must get to the Githyanki crèche, it's our only hope, she's trying to guide you towards the only salvation she knows from the parasite, so she can share it with you. And Gith... aren't supposed to do that, saving an outsider is not part of the doctrine, she's breaking the rules trying to do right by you. None of that means she's not being an asshole, she's rude, dogmatic and unpleasant. But everything she does comes from a genuine, very misguided and abrasive, desire to do the right thing. It doesn't make her behaviour okay, but there is more to her character than just "being the mean one."

To expand on this a bit more than I can in a 60 second short, people acting from fear and from their damage is a major theme among the Baldur's Gate 3 companions.

Lae'zel is terrified and falling back on the only thing she believes will give her back some control over her situation, which is the dogma of the military cult she's in. Shadowheart is much the same, amnesiac and grasping on to the only solid thing she knows, which is her faith, which preaches deception, loss and duplicity as the only certain factors in life.

Gale is an inveterate people-pleaser desperately dependent on other people to help him feed his magic addiction, with his overtly affable exterior hiding a rolling boulder of guilt, ambition, greed, arrogance and legitimate hurt. Asterion is... well, no way to really lay out his deal without spoiling, but the boy has been through it and his self-destructive, hedonistic and selfish impulses are all coping mechanism and self-defense all the time.

None of that make their shitty behaviours okay, but in a fictional story, those kinds of flaws and toxic behaviours are what make for interesting stories and characters. I don't blame anyone for finding Lae'zel unpleasant and abrasive, but I do get a bit Old Man Yells At Cloud about people who casually brag about shoving her off a cliff-side, or murdering her because "she was a bitch" or whatever.

Like... being unable to face discomfort in your media is not a virtue, and lashing out reactively against fiction that doesn't validate your power fantasy isn't a flex.

Of course, I saw a lot of those reactions in YouTube comments and on social media, so my sample is biased by those algorithms, but still. A lot of people seem aggressively proud that they never engaged with her story because the terrified indoctrinated child-soldier wasn't immediately nice to them and I can't explain it but something about that reaction feels puritan to me.

[chappellroansdreamgirl]

ellie with a mean gf!

(prjoecting like a mf rn...)

a/n - i have been very unmotivated to write full-fleshed stuff so i'm deciding to write drabbles/headcannons for now. also THANK YOU FOR ALL THE ATTENTION ON CH.1 OF GOOD LUCK, BABE! it makes my heart smile that you guys love it so much... also😭😭...: @sweetcici11 srry that i lied and said ur fic would be out a few nights ago. i'm really trying to finish it but i don't want to rush it and it be shitty. i really want it to be enjoyable and as good as it can be. but i PROMISE you it WILL be posted... sooner or later! i also have a few more drafts to finish too, so, i hope you guys like them when they come out!!!!!

content warnings - fluff, i'm a bitch and i want to feel loved and think that someone can put up with my cuntiness😝😝 , over-usage of commas probably, i think they're low-key kind of toxic?!?!?!?! , guys i promise i'm not this bad i've just been pretty insufferable these last few days and need an outlet 😭😭 .

i wrote way more than i thought i was going to...

------------------------------------------------------------

- you both hated each other at first. ...well actually, you hated her, and she was like, "😞😞" and then got used to it after a while and started being mean back 2 u!!

- dina introduced ellie to you when you both were hanging out with her. "you guys are going to love each other🥰!" ... you didn't 🤗 !

- ellie said hi to you and all you did was look her up and down, stare at her for a few seconds and then turn your head.

- everytime ellie would (attempt to) strike up a conversation you would give an overtly enthusiastic response or just stare at her like she had two heads or just blatantly ignore her. dina is over there like, '😟😟 . can we not have one good day...' when dina would leave for short periods of time and ellie was sure that you didn't like her, she would just talk about anything to get your blood boiling, our girl lllloooovvveessss to push buttons, we know this to be true.

- it got worse yet more tolerable after that. whenever she'd see you at gatherings or parties, you'd do your damnest to stay away from/avoid her. and she'd do her damnest to get you as upset with her as possible. it always ended with not-so-playful not-so-friendly banter!

- you were talking with jesse about something on the couch, and ellie came over and DELIBERATELY, DELIBERATELY... interrupted you 🤗 ! :

you shoot daggers at her face with your eyes, your jaw set hard and your eyes narrowed.

ellie tried to feign innocence, raising a brow at you after she looked over to see your facial expressions long after she felt them.. "what are you looking at me like that for🤨🤨?" , "i was fucking talking, you're being rude." , "if i have to get used to you being a bitch, you got to do the same." , you just huffed at her response and crossed your arms before walking off a few minutes after, realizing that the conversation you were having with jesse earlier was indeed over. ellie smirked to herself, victory was her's!

- she started calling you the nickname brat out of the blue... it blindsided tf out of you. here's the origin story!:

you look at ellie with a disgusted look on your face as she exhales smoke. her glazed over eyes meet yours before she offers the joint to you, out of genuine kindness. "want a hit?" she asked, forgetting how much of a bitch you were for, like, 0.2 seconds. you glare at her for a moment longer before plastering a sarcastic smile on your face, snatching the joint from her fingertips and dropping it onto the floor. you kept her eyes on yours as you stomped and smushed it into the ground.

now she remembered.

she stood up instantaneously, she was pissed. "what the fuck?!" she shouted, earning a few looks from some friends across the room. they strained their necks for a little bit before they saw you, it made sense now, and then turned back to the conversation.

you close your eyes for a slight second as a satisfied smile graced the corners of your lips. "you know i don't smoke, ellie." you responded with in a condescendingly sweet voice.

she didn't even argue with you. "you're such a fuckin' brat." she muttered under her breath before walking away. you had to try your very best to ignore the heartbeat in your pussy. (🤗!)

- she didn't get to see how much effect that title had on you that night, but she noticed afterwards.

- one time you didn't say anything to ellie during a hangout, distracted by someone you disliked more than her. ellie kind of missed it☹️☹️ .

you were brought out of your thoughts when you felt her cold hand touch your shoulder. when you noticed it was her who was doing it, you pulled back with a furrow of her brows. ellie smiled. there she was.

"you haven't said one mean thing to me since i've gotten here. are you dying?"

you scoffed as you pointed in the direction your anger was radiating from. it was a girl ellie saw here and there in jackson, sometimes she was paired with her during patrols, she wasn't crazy about her but she paid no mind to her existence.

"what?- what does this have to do with me-"

"what it has to do with you, is that you should feel honored that i can tolerate you... can't fuckin' stand that bitch."

ellie scoffed before speaking up once more, "oh, c'mon you're being dramatic. don't be a brat."

your eyes went wide for a second and as you turned away, she could see the cheek that was facing her turn an embarrassing shade of red. she found your weakness.

- when you guys started dating, no one, and i mean NO ONE, believed it. (i don't feel like writing how u two got together maybe if y'all like this enough i'll make a full-fleshed oneshot abt it😭.)

- joel saw you guys together... like, not arguing, and HER head on YOUR shoulder... he thought he got laced with acid for a quick second there... jesse felt like he missed a couple chapters and felt very sad that he hadn't caught onto it quicker... and dina was so proud of herself, "told you, you guys would love each other 😁." she's so smug, I LOVE HER!

- she constantly has to reprimand you like you're a child when you guys are around someone you obviously don't like for whatever reason. once whoever left the room, ellie'll pinch your shoulder or your thigh, whatever skin is on display at the moment, not too hard, just to get you to wince a bit. you'll make a face at her afterwards. "ow, what the fuck was that for ellie?" , "we can talk shit when we get home, don't make a scene🙄." you stress her out sometimes...

- just bcs you guys are together DOES NOT mean your attitude has gone away.

whenever ellie and you have gotten in an argument, you're always being extra sarcastic and EXTRA BITCHY just to get on her nerves.

"baby, have you seen my gun?" she asks you, breaking the silence voluntarily as she's two minutes from being late to patrol.

you don't look up to her, you keep on looking at the pages of an old magazine. "idk ellie, did you check to see if it was shoved up your ass."

she just stands there for a second like this 🧍‍♀️ , before sighing and walking somewhere else to find it. "i'll fuckin' deal with you later." she mutters under her breath, obviously annoyed. you smirk to yourself as you flip another page.

- she does love, however, that you've gotten gentler with her since the relationship blossomed between you two. very few people (dina and ellie... sometimes jesse.) can get you to stop, and ellie is proud of herself that she could add beast-tamer to the top of her list of many skills and talents.

- sometimes she has to calm you down, sometimes all it takes is a stare in your direction. ... well, it's oftentimes a glare... you're your own woman/person and a relationship will not restrict you from showing off your talents!!!!!

- ellie has to constantly keep you from getting into arguments that could harm you physically. although your craft of bitchery is amazing, you can't fight to save your life.

she'll be pulling you back like an angry barking dog on a leash.

"i could've fucking took h-" , "you overestimate yourself a lot, baby."

[boopshoops]

Common sense doesn't feel all that common when coming from a fella such as this.

template by ai-kan1! dividers here! sound on :)

Alias: Creek

Nickname(s): Cricket, Piranha

Gender: Xenogender

Pronouns: Any with they/it preference (they>it). Also prefers masculine language/titles (i.e. lad, mister, sir, etc.)

Sexuality: Unlabeled

Birthday: June 1 (Gemini)

Age: Somewhere close to 200, they've stopped counting

Height: 5'8 or 172cm, though the height of the doll is adjustable.

Voice Claim(s): Yuri Lowenthal, Keiichi Nanba

Twisted From: Jiminy Cricket

Unique Magic: None! It's magicless.

Job: Playful Land Owner

Hobbies: Terrarium making, architecture, entrepreneurship, bug collecting, raising bug colonies, reading, violin, creating soundscapes, fashion.

Likes: Bugs, spiders, nature, Italian roulade, their doll body, cricket song, old locomotives, leaving large impressions on others, seclusion.

Dislikes: Existentialism, extreme pessimism, extended periods of boredom, drawing in an unwanted crowd, unrewarded extended efforts.

Fears: Being completely numb, feeling nothing, being stuck in one place for too long.

Summary: The eccentric yet secluded benefactor of Playful Land, both feared and loved by many for their charities. The owner is known for exploring many different business ventures, to the point where their company is behind a startlingly large amount of big names and faces. It's been around for a suspiciously long amount of time... at least others find it suspicious, Creek's lifespan isn't that much of a secret to their close circle... that circle mostly consisting of a bunch of insects, but still.

Creek, evidently, is more so focused on doing their own thing and finding constant sources of emotion rather than living up to the standards their business has risen to. After all, once you reach the top, it has to find out just what else life has in store for them. That, and what life has in store for others. Whether that is dangerous or not is up to you, long as you stay on your toes.

Playful Land's owner is known among their hires - even in avenues outside the amusement park - as being oddly generous, if not even incredibly intelligent. Guidance is something they are almost always willing to offer, in any topic or field. Don't get it wrong, though. They're not kind or overtly rude. What you see is what you get, even if it gets you sent straight to hell. Thems the facts, lad.

CHARACTER PLAYLIST - CREATION STORY - DEATH STORY

Author's note: koisdghdosieeee theyre so sillayyy! theyre just sooo sillay guys trust me guys its just a sillay lil geek mk! wym they abandoned isola and stole whats practically her skeleton. what could u posibly mean i jhave no idea what you're talking about :) they just like little critters theyve never done anything wrong no human trafficking into labour here noooooooooooooooooooooooooo pal!!!!!! perfectly legal lived a perfectly normal amount of time totally is NOT a peepaw and has not fed ANYONE to their massive supply of crickets.

anyway ernesto/fellow bombing their giantass ship was the most entertaining thing thats happened to them in a decade <3

mr. "why are you charging those two for the destruction of the park" "i just wanted to see what would happen lol" Creek

Tag list :)

@skriblee-ksk @lowcallyfruity @justm3di0cr3 @kitwasnothere @cecilebutcher

@distant-velleity @thehollowwriter @techno-danger @scint1llat3 @the-trinket-witch

@beneathsakurashade @kathxrat-01 @qsoap @twsted-canvas @prince-kallisto

@gimmeurmoneyagh @tixdixl @sillyslipperybananapeel @twstinginthewind

[explodingchantry]

Anders isn't my problematic fave because he isn't problematic. I think the wider concept of anders being 'wrong' the fandom has is a clear example of how biased the writing has been in the games. It's the same reason why people hate Jowan, or why they think the kinloch hold mages were stupid. There's a clear bias in the writing and framing of it all that guides the player towards feeling negatively.

The majority of answers you can give Jowan in Dao are negative, mocking, or downright insulting. The ones who aren't are just... Neutral. You can be a bit sympathetic to him in the circle origin but by the time you meed him in redcliff most of your dialogue choices are so fucking mean. In my replay I was trying desperately to be nice and sympathetic to him but the best you can do is be neutral and let him go but for every rude dialogue option there is no "you've been through something horrible, I'm sorry" or "you were manipulated, loghain took advantage of your vulnerability, I'm sorry" it's soooooo.

Likewise, I always make sure to speak to every single npc in the mage origins and the One mention of uldred before the broken circle quest is from the one mage who tells you about the different political faction enchanters are in, and it's with absolute disdain. That mage thinks uldred is annoying and it's implied that the other enchanters think so, too. Uldred who was an activist for mage liberation is treated as annoying for being an activist.

Then he turns out to be a blood mage and to have killed the majority of the circle, turning them into abominations. The message is clear: those who seek liberation are wicked. In the first game of the series, thus in the game which introduced the concept of circles at all, their existence is justified by the text. It overtly says: look at all those foolish mages, how dangerous they can be when One of them is wicked. Can you imagine if they were free? Can you imagine those abominations' destruction if they were out in the open?

Something similar happens in the mage origin, with Jowan. Through the whole origin, whilst Jowan is painted as annoying, he's definitely seen as a victim. Up until he uses blood magic, that is. Suddenly, the player is likely supposed to think "oh, so they were right to want to make him tranquil after all". Instead of being a way to show that the circle will often turn innocent mages tranquil, it shows you that greagoir was right to distrust Jowan, because he was indeed a blood mage. Instead of showing you how paranoid those in power are about mages, the writing justifies their fear and hatred.

Bear in mind this is the first game and likely the very first thing that happens to a lot of new players. The game does not expect you to know the intricacies of its lore yet, doesn't expect you to understand that blood magic is actually fucking neutral unless you sacrifice people for it. You might be tempted to argue that it's setting up for that realisation later and for you to feel bad about Jowan later, realizing he was led to blood magic because it was his only solution, because he and all other mages are caged like dogs (except this is ferelden, so the dogs are better treated than them). But then you've got the redcliff fiasco where it's obvious the writers expect you to fucking hate his guts

And while dragon age 2 is more overt in its depiction of mage suffering, it also tries to pass on the idea that kirkwall is a special case, that it's only the gallows that are this bad. That it's just Meredith whose craaazeyyy 🤪 and not just Meredith being a product of a corrupt system. The writers expect you to think of Anders as an unstable extremist, or as his writer puts it, a "bipolar terrorist" (note that ofc there's nothing fucking wrong with being bipolar, but I don't think his writer cares!)

With different writers and the exact same set of events, Anders blowing up the chantry would be easily recognized as a positive, as an act of justice, of rightful rebellion. Instead it's seen as a tragedy, a mistake. Instead Anders is categorized as a villain, morally grey even though Hawke themselves has a higher death toll than he ever will.

It's a lesson, I think. In narrative bias.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Do you think all the characters are assholes?

Because i think they are despite their tragic backstories and i also don't think they appreciate Yuu enough, except for maybe the first years

I mean, the TWST characters are (mostly) inspired by Disney villains... Plus, they’re immature high schoolers still in the process of emotionally maturing. Of course they're not going to be perfect balls of sunshine. They're all going to be rude or have faults in their own ways, but they also have their strengths and charm points. I do call them assholes (lovingly), but I would hesitate to slap a singular label on any of the characters when they're all very well-rounded and morally ambiguous.

On the topic of Yuu, I think it makes sense that most of the cast doesn't really "appreciate" them. To begin with, most of the characters are not the openly sentimental types; they wouldn’t overtly express that gratitude even if it were present. Then we have to consider that Yuu isn't directly involved in their character growth or arcs in most cases; it's often the other characters who are confronting the OB boys or instigating, physically battling them to snap them out of it, and then comforting them afterwards.

As early as book 1, that pattern holds true. Ace is the one that initially pissed Riddle off. Adeuce are dueling Riddle. Ace decks Riddle and claims his last straw. Trey is the one calling out to Riddle as he's losing it. It's the members of Heartslabyul who gather around Riddle when he reawakens following the OB. (I'm not going to go through and list off what happens in every single book, but I'm sure you can think of many other instances... Lilia insulting Leona, Deuce and Epel having the heart-to-heart on the beach, Octavinelle's plot against Jamil, the twins checking up on Azul post-OB, etc.) To me, it feels like it is the boys and their bonds with one another responsible for the change, not Yuu's involvement. Yuu is usually along for the ride and actually does and says very little despite all the fandom jokes about "being the school's unpaid but overworked therapist" or Crowley's shallow claim that Yuu can help the boys learn to cooperate (which feels more like a vague ruse only shown in the prologue to shoehorn Yuu into the plot). There's actually very little in-game that shows them being active in helping the students change for the better. Much of the time, the boys can resolve their own struggles to get along without Yuu being there (like all those pair-ups in book 6–sure, it may have taken a while, but the fact remains that they did eventually resolve their own issues and cooperate without Yuu having to orchestrate for them; this also happens many times in events like Port Fest, Wish Upon a Star, Ghost Marriage, the Halloween events, etc). A very common complaint (at least among English speaking players) is that Yuu isn’t “involved enough” or that they don’t have a big impact on the events of the story. Therefore, most of the boys not feeling close or indebted to Yuu makes sense from their POV. What has Yuu actually and explicitly done to help them? Not much. It’s mainly in individual fan interpretations where Yuu/a Yuusona/an OC in Yuu’s role is actually able to play a more substantial part in each characters’ life and growth. In general, the standard in-game Yuu is more of a "fly on the wall" character that witnesses events unfold rather than someone who plays a large role in each book. The boys are seemingly the main characters, not Yuu. It's just convenient to have Yuu/a blank slate in the story because they, as an outsider, need TWST concepts explained to them (thus making it easier to give exposition to the players who may also be unfamiliar with the information). The first years, by comparison, are closer to Yuu simply because 1) Yuu is implied to be in the same year level as them (so they're more likely to be exposed to one another) and 2) their preestablished relationships with Grim, Ace, and Deuce opens them up more to first year interactions. "Friends of friends", if you will. It makes more sense than Yuu being appreciated and loved by everyone/most people in the main cast of 22ish. (How many people do you know irl that have 22ish significant friends?) They spend the most time together. Everyone else tends to stick to their own groups (with maybe the exception of Heartslabyul, since Yuu is already close with Adeuce). They’re just... not as intimate with Yuu, and therefore not as inclined to find much appreciation for them.

I want to clarify that this doesn’t mean there are zero instances of the characters outside of the first years expressing gratitude toward Yuu. Like, of the OB boys, it’s only Vil who consistently apologizes for the trouble he caused (note though: it’s not specifically to Yuu, but to everyone in the VDC/SDC squad. Yuu is then given prize money from most of the other boys as thanks for letting them crash at Ramshackle… Of those, only Kalim cites being grateful that he was able to stay and have fun with everyone because of Yuu green lighting the decision. This makes sense, as Kalim’s one of the few who wears his heart on his sleeve and is friendly to most. It just isn’t true for the majority of the cast, and we shouldn’t expect it to be.

As late as book 5, you can see characters like Leona not being so happy to be called out to or for Grim to act all buddy-buddy with him. That indicates to me that the rest of the cast is not that close to Yuu + related parties and doesn't have a real reason to be. (Note: I'm not counting character voice lines here as proof of friendliness with Yuu, as it can be argued that the relationships and events explored in the cards don't run in tandem with the main story and are meant more as fanservice for the players.)

Again, while it's not that fun to read in a narrative, it does leave things open-ended for anyone who wants to self-insert or to expand on those blank relationships for their own characters. I believe this is by design to appeal on an individual level to players. You get out of it what you put into it!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for asking someone not to make my art about a ship I hate?

This happened a couple months ago, but I’m still kinda unsure if I handled it correctly.

Basic rundown of events: I posted some art of a character on their own in the evening, and when I woke up the next morning, someone had reblogged with an addition about a ship that’s a big notp for me. I messaged them to ask they delete it as politely as possible, because people had been interacting with that version of the post specifically and it made me uncomfortable. They responded by saying I was being immature and needed to learn not to police what other people do on the internet. We exchanged a couple more messages, and I tried to explain my position my throughly. Neither of us was overtly hostile or anything, but I felt extremely talked down to by their tone of voice. After our conversation, we both blocked each other, and that was that. They never did delete their addition.

Why I think I might be TA: we weren’t exactly friends or anything. Neither of us followed each other. I’d seen them around in the fandom, and they’d reblogged some of my art in the past, but I think messaging someone I didn’t know instead of just blocking them might have been a bit of an overreach. Plus the ship in question is canon, and not particularly controversial or anything, so most people in the fandom probably wouldn’t have minded.

On the other hand, the ship being so unavoidable is a big part of the reason it upset me so much. It’s hard for me to exist in this fandom without having to see it constantly, and I don’t even ever mention the other character in it for fear of this exact thing happening. I’ve had people be assholes on my posts about the ship I prefer, or go out of their way to interpret my romantic posts about them platonically, or add tags to my art about how they only like my ship as backstory and not endgame. I don’t want to have to put a disclaimer every single time I post about this fandom. I just want to enjoy the things I like without being negative all the time. Which is why I figured messaging privately was more polite than making a stink where everyone could see. I specifically mentioned that I knew they wouldn’t have known and wasn’t mad.

No one actually ended up reblogging their addition, which is also a strike against me, but I got a lot of likes on specifically that version of the post, which made me scared they were going to. I hated the idea of having to turn off reblogs on a piece I’d worked pretty fucking hard on because a version I found so upsetting was in circulation. If it was just tags, I’d have blocked, but it being an addition is different. I don’t think asking people not to make my posts about it is “policing what other people do on the internet”. You’re in MY house, on MY post with MY art I spent hours on. Making additions to art posts already seems somewhat rude to me, that’s just not something you do, but I guess that’s a matter of the corner of tumblr culture you’re used it.

Also, their response felt very aggressive and condescending. They implied I was, like, a kid, and I do think I’m somewhat younger than them, but the only information about my age in my bio at the time was that I’m an adult, so it felt like a rude assumption. My age doesn’t have anything to do with it.

Again, though, I do absolutely see how my initial message could read as entitled. During the rest of our messaging, I did lose my temper a little bit at one point; I said something about how I’ve had to deal with shit in this fandom before, and I don’t remember the exact words since, again, we both blocked each other, but I know I swore at them. That might’ve come across as more aggressive than I wanted, and probably didn’t exactly help deescalate. (Can’t say for sure, I don’t have their side of the story)

Like I said, this situation was a bit ago now, but it upset me pretty bad at the time, and I’m still not entirely sure who’s in the wrong. So, AITA?

(Also to get ahead of this: please don’t make this about shipcourse in the comments. It’s not about that. They and I have similar opinions on that discourse from what I’ve gathered anyway. Thanks.)

What are these acronyms?

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

FINALLY I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT

May I please request Chiori with a really sweet doting S/O? Like they make sure she eats well and doesn't skip any meals, helps her deal with annoying customers (albeit more diplomatically) etc.

(Genshin Impact) Chiori with a doting S/O

Quoth the Akihiko: I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

Truthfully, Chiori found S/O annoying at first.

The way they were so overtly kind to her, she thought they wanted something for free or were hoping for some kind of favor.

But after realizing they just simply cared about her, she let it slide.

After all, Chiori was a firm believer of "scratch my back, I'll scratch yours".

And it was nice to have someone not criticize her for being herself.

(S/O) "Chiori! I have some lunch ready!"

Chiori's smile is gentle as she puts her tools down and stretches her arms.

(Chiori) "Thanks. I'll be sure to enjoy it."

As thanks for their efforts, Chiori makes sure to make some Inazuman deserts or even tailor them a custom-made outfit on the house.

(S/O) "Chiori, let me help pay at lea-!"

(Chiori) "Hush. Just pay me in exposure by wearing this when we go out together, and that'll be good enough. Now quit reaching for your pouch, I need to take measurements for your arms.

And when it comes to the customers...

(S/O) "Hello, may I help you?"

S/O asks with a beaming smile, the customer turned to them with an exasperated expression.

(Man) "That employee over there is so rude! How do you let that behavior slide, what are you some kind of lazy bum?!"

Chiori's head now turns, her nerves clearly standing on their last legs. S/O keeps their smile as they respond.

(S/O) "Think of me as a negotiator, so to speak. I'll keep this brief, so I would kindly ask for you to leave the store, for your own sake-"

(Man) "What?! I came in here to get a custom made suit, not get berated by its workers! I demand to speak to your manager!"

(S/O) "I would advise against that-"

(Man) "Bah, you're just as useless as that girl over there!"

Chiori gently pushes S/O behind her, clearing her throat.

(Chiori) "Allow me to take you to the manager personally, sir."

CRASH!

The man is face-first on the pavement as Chiori brushes her hands off while S/O grabs a broom, still keeping their smile.

(Chiori) "You were right about one thing, S/O. The negotiations were short."

Despite her prickly personality, S/O never once had an issue with it, which is what completely shocked her.

But honestly, it was something Chiori grew to love about them.

And for that, she never once criticized them for being too loving.

[cipheramnesia]

I would not expect a huge amount from a reality/found footage horror movie about a possessed pregnancy, called "Delivery: The Beast Within" to necessarily offer much, but I figured the concept was just interesting enough that it would at least be, at a bare minimum, interesting to watch. And well, I don't know what to say except this is why I watch random horror, because Delivery: The Beast Within is a really good fake documentary horror.

So the strengths of this style of movie usually revolve around actors delivering more improvised or natural performances, needing relatively few budget intensive effects, and generally using the appearance of lower quality filmmaking to their advantage for suspense or realism. However, the majority of these types of movies generally treat the capacity to use these techniques gives them complete freedom from the need for direction, cinematography, or consistent writing. Plus, of course, the perennial nagging question of "why are they still filming this?" The Paranormal Activity series is probably the best example of lazy found footage horror, where the actors replace naturalistic improvisation with simply being very rude and generally angry at one another, and long, static shots for the sake of a single minor detail pad out the runtime. Poorly made films of this type can feel like they drag on for hours waiting for anything to happen.

Delivery effectively managing to dodge all of the major issues, provide a solid and tense work of horror, along side a bit of subtext plus a genuinely disturbing ending makes the whole affair rather brilliant. I'm not sure what decision helped the most. Having realistic story beats helped a lot - no one in the movie suddenly turns their life over to an imaginary exorcist, everyone acknowledges the protag is going through it, the supernatural parts are just this side of questionable that there's no reason to jump ship. It plays heavily into terrible, family friendly reality TV tropes up front, and there's a good chemistry between the leads where they seem to genuinely care for each other, which makes the gradual decline more distressful. It's just a lot of little details like the way the video artifacting is isolated to the pregnant woman (and switches immediately to the baby after it is born). The husband's reaction to what seems like miscarriage (it felt very nuanced, as someone who gets pretty quiet with strong emotions), and the one major event that makes the couple sever their connection with the documentary crew for several months. It's all a series of clever details that develop into a relatively well thought out plot, good pacing, and respectable camerawork.

On top of all that solid technical foundation, Delivery is also prodding at the USAmerican concept of pregnancy - how it's idealized, how little the physical and mental wear on women is discussed, the stress on relationships, really most of the ways it can impact on people physically, mentally, and socially. This isn't new territory per se, but Delivery makes these topics feel more a piece of the film text, rather than something overtly pointed out to the audience. No one person is explicitly gaslighting or deliberately misleading the pregnant woman, but the social pressures on her both as an expectant mother and also as a woman in crisis surrounded by support for her pregnancy specifically is tangible. It's the kind of subtext you don't necessarily need to recognize to enjoy Delivery as a solid horror film, but it adds layers and emotional resonance to the story.

As a film, it's what you might call a high B; a solid 8/10 performance from something that looks like it's working with 1/10 resources. They tapped into something and everyone involved very clearly committed. There are of course multiple trigger warnings around babies, pregnancy, and animals. But the ending. That was something.

[wileys-russo]

PSA; some of you need to learn how to exist on the internet without being creepy, rude, disgusting or invasive and unfortunately it’s likely the same person doing this to everyone but this app really doesn’t bring me much joy at the moment and my anons are off for however long I need them to be

words don’t bother me im an adult, but the constant negativity and nitpicking and disrespect about what I do post, when I don’t post, who im friends with on here, how I apparently copy everyone which is ridiculous and has no merit but seems to be ongoing. Down to my relationship status, guessing where I live, threats, sending really overtly sexual messages and pictures, all becomes overwhelming and ruins the community aspect of tumblr which is sad

[the-meme-monarch]

Is your DW clock oc trans, like F to nb or original created as nb? Because their vintage skin has eyelashes. I'm sorry if it sounds rude

i don’t really know ! my sibling and i joked that they were made as a background character/ only ever used in scenes as “town rooster” to announce morning, so their gender was just never decided and so when they were brought to life it ended up being Well They Don’t Have One. but I’m really the only person I know who makes characters and doesn’t immediately decide a gender for them(often resulting in them just not having one) also if we’re applying any real world sentiments the show is from like the late 80s-90s iirc so Being Overtly Nonbinary probably just wouldn’t be allowed unless for ridicule, and this is a kids show about friendship. so yeah probably ftnb. or maybe intersex ! their vintage’s clock hands were meant to resemble a mustache

[i-didnt-do-1t]

cw. mentioned death.

It wasn’t the first time her and Jack had fought, she wasn’t sure if she could include the argument on the rooftop, but they’d had their fair share of petty fights since.

This didn’t feel petty though, it felt far too real, and charged and she didn’t get angry like this often but he was making her sound like she was crazy.

“I still don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.”

“You do, I know you do.” She paused, waiting for him to respond or turn to face her, watching the way the muscles on his back worked as he reached up to paint the top left corner of a new back drop for Medda. “Jack would you look at me-“

“I’m paintin’, Kathy.”

“We’re having a conversation.”

“I can multi-task.”

She tensed her jaw, could feel a quiet aching creeping up her throat and tried to swallow it down but it didn’t help.

“You’re being rude.”

“Kathy.” It was spat and overtly unapologetic, his back still turned to her though she could see the white knuckle grip he had on his paintbrush. “Sorry that I weren’t taught etiquette like the guys you grew up around, but could just let me work? And stop asking about stuff I ain’t wanna talk about?”

“I’m not trying to be invasive. There’s no need to be so horrible.”

When he didn’t turn around, and didn’t answer, she tightened her arms around herself, folded over her chest.

“Fine.”

The slight heels of her shoes echoed around the auditorium as she stormed out, maybe Jack looked at her then, felt sick the way she did whenever they argued and it was real and serious, but she didn’t turn around to check.

She slammed the door behind her.

…

She didn’t mean to end up at the distribution gate, the path was familiar these days and she frequently walked the cobblestoned streets to meet Jack when he collected the evening edition but it was nearer night now, the sky dark and drizzling with rain and if she was cold she wouldn’t admit it.

There were still two figures, just inside the gate, loading excess piles of papers into a cart, and one of them brushing up the courtyard in a way that felt pointless considering it was late autumn. The one at the cart threw his head back in what looked like a laugh and Katherine almost felt bad interrupting but curiosity and anger had brewed into a concoction of stubbornness in the pit of her stomach.

“Excuse me?” The gate creaked open under her touch. “Mr delancey?”

It had been months since she last talked to them, had no reason to run into them aside from the strike, but she’d seen them around her father’s office, always together, always scowling.

They both stopped to look at her, as she stepped into the yard, aware of the mud staining the hem of her dress and the way it splattered across her shoes.

“Pulitzer?” It was Oscar, she was fairly certain, though she couldn’t say for sure. Tall, and messy brown curly hair and dark eyes as glared at her. “The hell do you want. Kelly ain’t here.”

“I know he’s not.” She hesitated, observed the way the two of them shared a look. “I wanted to ask you something.”

Oscar raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

She swallowed.

“I- the last time I spoke to you, in my father’s office, you mentioned that Jack had a brother.” Oscar’s expression shifted. “Was his name Michael, by any chance?”

The silence, aside from the city settling down for the evening, seemed to stretch, only to be interrupted by Oscar barking out a laugh.

“Yeah. Yeah, the kid was called Michael. Why do you wanna know. Kelly ain’t told you?” His voice was amused.

If she wasn’t so frustrated, she knew she wouldn’t reveal something so personal, and she wasn’t doing it to be mean, she reassured herself, she just had to know. How on earth was she meant to help Jack if she didn’t know.

Still, It wasn’t all that comforting a thought, especially not as Oscar looked at her, leaning back casually against the cart he’d just been loading, a gleam of something cruel in his eyes.

Or maybe it was just the street lamp.

“Jack’s been saying it in his sleep.” She said, instead of acknowledging it. “And waking up crying, night terrors, I assume.”

“Yeah. He used to get those.”

“So. Why. Over what. I know- I know the refuge was bad but I don’t quite understand-“

“Michael’s dead.”

The stubbornness in her stomach turned to lead. “What?”

“Michael. Kelly’s brother.” He spoke slowly, like she was stupid, shoving a hand in his pocket and pulling out a box of cigarettes as he did so, “he died, and cowboy pretty much killed him.”

“No. No, Jack wouldn’t-“

“You want a smoke?”

Her hands were shaking, she was freezing. The box was being held out to her and she acted on instinct, reaching for one. His fingers were freezing and ink stained where hers brushed his, short bitten fingernails lined with dirt and grit.

“Jack wouldn’t.” She repeated.

“Maybe not on purpose.” He fished a match from a different pocket. “But he loaded him on the back of the carriage, tryna escape the refuge y’know. Like a fuckin’ idiot. And the kid fell off. Cracked his head open and then got run over by the back wheel.”

He said it casually as he lit the end of his cigarette. Like it was nothing.

.

“What.”

Her voice was a croak.

Oscar inhaled smoke and scoffed at her.

“Cowboy got out and Michael didn’t. Could see it from the window.”

“Oh. my god.”

“S’ probably reachin’ that time a year. It was near christmas, I think. Right mo?”

“Yeah. Yeah. cause Snyder gave folk turkey at dinner a couple weeks later.”

“Oh yeah. Course. It was shit.”

The cold air was biting. Katherine could feel it down to her bones.

“I- wait. So Jack-“

“Yeah. Fuckin’ stupid. Kelly can have a go at me all he fuckin’ wants. But at least I kept my wee brother alive.”

“But-“

“You can tell when you know, you see how he acts with the tiny Jacobs? It’s like he forgets sometimes, that he ain’t his.”

That backs of her eyes burned, the aching from the back of her throat creeping up the base of her skull and she had to press a palm over her mouth, gaze blurring with tears.

“Are you cryin’, Pulitzer?”

She was sure she was going to throw up.

“Christ. It was ages ago. Cryin’ ain’t gonna do shit. But it’s probably why he’s havin’ nightmares.”

He exhaled smoke as he spoke, and the smell of it turned Katherine’s stomach.

She pictured Jack again, alone in the theatre, covered in paint and the way she knew he roughly wiped away angry tears with the back of his hand.

The empty look in his eyes when he’d wake up from one of those dreams, pushing away the hand that was carding through his hair, breathing heavy and ignoring her and pressing the heels of his palms to his eyes.

“You gonna smoke that or jus’ hold it.”

She let her hand fall, wordlessly handed back the cigarette. Oscar hesitated.

Held her gaze.

“I dunno actually.” He paused, gave her a once over. “Maybe you should smoke it.”

Beside him Morris nodded, exhaling a lung full of smoke into the cold air.

“It helps.”

[kafus]

as the resident ceo of likodot, what are your thoughts on the scene in episode 9 where dot ends up being the one who gives liko the courage she needs to tell her father that she wants to continue traveling with the RVT?

AH YES. THIS SCENE. I HAVE MANY THOUGHTS. THANK U FOR ASKING. apologies if this post is messy i have brainfog but i wanted to answer it anywayyyy

dot and liko's early connection is pretty interesting to me because at the time of this episode, the two barely know each other. dot first appears in episode 7 and this happens a couple episodes later in episode 9... not a lot of time has passed.

at this point in episode 9, liko knows that dot:

is murdock's niece and around the same age as her

is a tech wiz who wrote the app the RVT use to maintain the brave asagi and talk to each other

is good at gathering info online too

is a social recluse

does not eat very well/doesn't eat with other people

is interested in legendary pokemon, mysteries, that sort of stuff

and of course, she has heard the gurumin theme song coming from dot's room, and seen her quaxly, which leads to the iconic misunderstanding that dot is a huge fan of gurumin and not... literally gurumin lol

on the other hand, liko has no idea what dot looks like, does not know anything about her history, and has not had a proper conversation with her - their only communications have been through her bedroom door, first through quaxly bringing her and roy notes (which are drawings to interpret and not even actual written words), then when dot yells angrily at her to shut up/go away because she's interrupting dot setting up for her livestream, and then when dot finally budges just enough to mention her interest in legendaries & mysterious things.

by all regards dot is probably more of a concept to liko at this point than a whole person; a disembodied sometimes-voice who belongs to someone that deserves to be reached out to, but who hasn't actually been reached yet. this is overtly clear with her misunderstanding about dot being a gurumin fan - liko is piecing together who she thinks dot is with very little context clues and actual interactions and she is literally drawing the wrong conclusions lol. at most right now liko is interested in dot because of the whole gurumin thing... and because she's just a compassionate person who can't imagine that the person behind that door is a bad one, or someone who should be ignored, so she's compelled to learn more and reach out and figure dot out.

and that's the thing. liko is just naturally the sort of person to want to go out of her way to reach out to dot despite knowing pretty much nothing about her personally, and even having their first couple of interactions be rude ones. she follows through - she takes dot's lunch to her, makes sure to say "i'll talk to you later" and thank her for things, in a way that roy isn't (not to say that roy doesn't care, but liko is focused on her in particular). sure, the idea that they have a mutual interest in gurumin definitely helps, but she was interested before that and wasn't thrown off by her rude drawing of roy losing to fuecoco even before she started associating dot with gurumin. and this, especially coming from a peer and not a worried adult, is certainly foreign to dot and she kind of doesn't know how to deal with it, but it means a lot to her.

^ i think this bit at the end of episode 8 after liko and roy walk away is a really good summary of how dot is about all of this. she's reclusive, doesn't like noise, likes being in her own space, and she's "supposed" to find people like roy and liko irritating... but she can't help but smile about them being around, and while thinking about them.

oh, and of course dot has been overwhelmed by liko's compliments towards her work as gurumin even though liko doesn't know that's who she's complimenting. she's a popular youtuber and i'm sure she gets compliments from people all the time, but this is definitely a foreign experience for her in person, coming from someone verbally like that, not to mention how genuine and passionate liko is about it. i mean it makes her blush like this okay come on:

ALL OF THIS is to say that liko is a meaningful person to dot at this point, despite how little liko actually knows about her. liko has reached out to her in a way that no one has before, has directly complimented her work/passion, and has responded to her rudeness/antisocial behavior with even more curiosity instead of shying away.

so like of course when it's possible that liko is going to leave, she's upset about it and wants to do something about it. this is such a new situation and she's still so reclusive that she needs a little push from landau (who knows her well enough to tell she has emotions about this despite her not exactly wearing them on her sleeve), but the feelings she has about liko are enough to push her through, just enough to leave a wordless drawing by her door, which is massive for her at this point in time.

liko's response to this is understandably not super expressive or emotional, and in fact right after seeing the drawing, she first has a far more emotive conversation with mollie and orio and then roy, before eventually taking the drawing with her to dot's door and thanking her. she still doesn't know dot that well and honestly even though she was thinking that dot was opening up a little bit, she probably didn't expect this gesture. she doesn't know how meaningful her reaching out to dot has actually been.

regardless, she understands the meaning of the drawing and once again goes to talk to her, even without expecting a response back, and is able to go leave and tell her dad she wants to stay on the brave asagi, so it obviously contributed to her courage. it's proof that even this person who she barely knows cares about her and wants her to stay, and it also rewards her efforts of reaching out and proves to her that yes, dot is opening up and receiving liko's attempts at reaching out - her advances aren't unwanted. how's she supposed to leave now that she's sunk this time and effort into connecting with dot? dot is not the only reason she wants to stay of course, but it's a piece of the puzzle. she can't just leave now that they've made this connection successfully!!

dot says this after liko's already left, but regardless they've made a connection in their own unique, nonverbal way, and of course everything between them continues to grow from here.

so anyway all of this is to say i think it's fascinating the way these two connect mostly without words and through action/gesture at the start of the series, and i think the lopsidedness of their connection with each other is actually pretty interesting and reveals how much liko's compassion and efforts affect dot early on. she really is the vessel through which dot comes out of her shell and that's evident from the beginning

ALSO as an aside, very cute that dot does these little doodles at all? they aren't bad!! liko also draws... even though dot doesn't seem to take it as seriously or have it as an actual hobby i think they should draw together i think this would be cute JIOSJDOF

[maleyanderecafe]

Good day! I was wondering if your review on Restart Heart has changed after the new demo came out recently? If you haven't played it yet, I suggest trying it out and letting us know what you think of it.

After trying my hand at the updated demo, I can safely say that my personal opinion has changed quite a bit since the very first version. The MC seems a touch more like an insufferable prick now with how rude they are towards some characters, how "Mary Sue" they act in given situations, and how they overreact to certain events occurring around them. Their inner thoughts and rational thinking are nothing like mine as well, but that's more of a personal thing. While I'm aware it's currently still a demo and these events aren't considered "canon" by the dev, it isn't exactly doing a good job at persuading me to try out the finished version of the game once it comes out.

I do like that there are more than one "main" yandere now, however unfortunately none of the other characters aside from Ezra and Sammy really appeal to me. Each character seems very "stereotypical" and play into a very specific trope, but it's been like that since the first release so I'm not too bothered by it. I guess I was hoping for more developed and interesting characters in the update and got let down with the lack of improvement from the first version.

I'm also unsure how I feel about how overly "woke" the demo is trying to be? The overuse of Arabic phrases by Bess seems somewhat out of place and repetitive, so many characters are overtly trans or use their ethnicity as a base for their personality (especially seen on tumblr), the NSFW scenes [in the first version] feel like I was being babysat with the constant "consent check ins" and boundary implementations, and characters like Steph talk about their job [a pornstar] as though it's something to glorify or romanticize. The game's job is to make these characters appealing enough for us to pursue but I can't get over how forced/unnecessary their backstories and personalities feel. I'm transmasc myself but I'm put off by these constant reminders being shoved in my face at every turn, especially on the official tumblr page. I like that these sorts of things are being represented in a positive way (much less in a visual novel where it's so rare), but I don't like how constant and overplayed they are.

I will say that the writing has definitely improved in the new demo and it doesn't feel as overtly casual with the grammar and punctuation anymore (almost as if the narrator was texting me rather than talking to me). The characters have established connections with the MC now which I like, though I understand that this may not be everyone's cup of tea. The new CGs are nice too, however I won't comment on the updated art style since I personally prefer the scratchy anime style of games like TKATB, Mushroom Oasis, and even 14DWY [the first version]. I've always liked the music used and the GUI looks good, so I didn't mind not seeing much of an update for them in the new demo.

Overall, I have mixed feelings but I'm hopeful and optimistic that the finished version will be much better if the updated demo is anything to go by. I also hope there won't be a price tag on the finished product because as good as it is now, there is still so much that needs to be improved on to justify even a $5 label. These are my personal thoughts, though I'd love to hear yours as well.

It took me a while to replay the new demo and then find the older demos since it's no longer on the itchio page (There is still a link for the third day, but I had to watch epsylion's video on the fourth day, which excludes some routes). I admit that while I am generally aware of what is going on with various vns and their updates, I haven't had time to really go through and play most of them, so if there is a game that I have gone over before but it has updated, feel free to send me an ask.

Restart Heart seems to have an interesting conception, with the game going up to it's fourth day, before eventually being pulled back into a shorter demo that encapsulates the first day, likely to revamp and improve on the game as a whole. As such, I'm not sure if I've missed anything specifically as I'm not on the patreon . As a quick recap, the general plot of the first demo was that the MC, Sugar basically went on a huge party rager after finding out their ex fiance cheated on them and got their younger sister pregnant. As a result, the four days that we do spend with Sugar and the other characters are generally Sugar attempting to get back on their feet with the help of Ezra and the other characters, Bess, Blaire, Sammy, Chris and Steph along with sleeping with some of them if you so choose to. The new demo is a bit similar but only covers Sugar before finding out about the cheating, with them having a smaller interaction with the rest of the crew at the chocolate place they work at (namely that they almost got crushed by a bunch of staplers).

I think compared to the four day version of Restart Heart, I actually prefer this new demo's Sugar to the old one, though that's likely going to change once they find out about the cheating that's going on. While I understand that Sugar is going through a generally horrible situation of someone cheating on them, I also find their behavior kind of hard to deal with and not that much fun to play with. This is just my general gripe with a lot of yandere vns, not just Restart Heart in particular, where the MC tends to be very cynical and dislikes doing... well anything, which to me is a touch tedious and kind of annoying at times. I also feel like from the four day version, they feel a lot more bitter and angry (again due to the break up) but also coddled very heavily as well. Understandably it is nice to have someone who is able to care about you and try to make things feel better when everything feels like it's falling apart, but to me it still feels very infantalizing in some aspects, with every character seemingly trying to nurse Sugar back to feeling better. It's likely more of a me thing since I've always been the type of person to drag myself back up by my feet, rather than attempt to rely too much on other people. In the new demo, Sugar has yet to experience this (at least from what I can tell) so is generally more stable and less prickly. I don't think it's particularly Mary Sue like in the new demo, considering that I feel like if my friend almost got crushed by a bunch of staplers, we'd all run over there too and make sure that they're okay, though I can see where you're coming from since most of the characters are revolving around Sugar in that sort of way. It's hard to say what kind of characters the Restart Heart gang will be considering that it is still a demo, but considering it did have four days already out, I can see what you mean. We don't get to see too much into their lives (outside of Blaire, I think which probably has the most characterization out of Chris and of course Ezra). It would be nice for them to do other things as well like go out on dates or just hang out more one on one (like going to hang out at the library with Sammy, for instance) to get to know them a bit more.

Interesting take on it. I did notice that Bess uses a lot of Arabic phrases, kind of like someone who is trying to learn the language and is attempting to use it in their every day life so that they can remember it. I don't think that specifically was the intention, but it did come off like that for me. I'm not really sure what you mean by "overtly trans or use their ethnicity as a base for their personality", do you mean as more of like that's their main personality trait? A very minor confusion I have with the game is the use of pronouns that are attached onto the characters. That in itself isn't really a problem but it does seem a touch redundant because there is a character bio for all of the characters that already has the pronouns on it. Not anything huge, but it is a strange decision to make. The checkins for nsfw content is generally a thing that happens in a lot of r18 yandere vns, but I do get that it does feel very babysitting like, especially if it's something that happens after the initial agreement.

I do agree that the writing has improved a lot more, with the characters written in a more lifelike manner and feels more like they have known Sugar for a while. I also agree that it's nice that they have more stronger connections to Sugar this time around. I think the music is good, though I do wish that they would change it up more since the same soundtrack repeated does make it a bit tiring (though this is likely just a demo thing). Lilith did a good job of coding everything as expected, especially with the pronoun, name, partner, nickname choices in the very beginning. There is a lot of variation for people who want to be called a specific way during the NSFW parts (though admittedly I don't really like most of them since well, I prefer submissive yanderes). They are doing a lot of projects right now, so it is hard to say when the full version will come out and what the quality will be right now. Hopefully it will come out well though, and there will be more yandere content that I can shift through.