#but its ok her music will get me through my homework at least

[eefozlab]

mitski will cure me(no she will not my disease is not-having-a-halloween-costume-itis)

[definitelynuwonhere]

“His Hazel Gaze”

I had Literature homework, asking me to create a haiku, and since my brain is literally just redacted I based it off the cowboy, cuz ofc I did. Now im capitalizing off of it by expanding the idea cuz I’m wired and have freewill

This won’t be in a traditional writing format cuz I’m lazy and literally just following the words that flow in fear of losing track.

———

PICTURE IT: Sophomore year, a new student is introduced, Samuel Collins, immediately catching, you guessed it, Tank’s attention. Well, honestly Asher, who then pointed him out to them. But of course they respond with a punch to his arm.

Sam was a good student, turned work in time, participated in class, but mostly kept to himself. Except for the times he’d gotten dragged by Asher to join them at their group table.

That’s when Tank really began to interact with him. It’s how they found out he liked vanilla ice cream, or how he owned every color of the same type of flannel, and that his eyes were brown, hazel brown.

They never really paid attention to those types of things, hell they barely knew their friend’s favorite colors, cept for Asher’s, because of his constant fights with Milo over blue gatorade and him saying it was “his brand”.

They never really cared, all until him. Suddenly they were keeping mental notes of the things he liked and didn’t liked, how he preferred podcasts over music, and horror to action movies. They knew it all. But probably their most favorite, is how his golden gaze sparkled in the sun.

It was into the first week of meeting him when they saw them, sun kissed by the star’s rays. Ash had asked (begged) him to join them up their usual spot near the cliff, using David’s dad’s pickup truck, the group had settled into a spot amidst the trees, popping open a few soda cans and snacks as they watched the busy city below them.

The sun was near setting, casting down its rays perfectly on their spot on the cliff. Sam had been laughing, at least it looked like it, with Asher, probably with his shitty jokes. His dark brown locks looked almost golden in the sun, and his eyes, having locked briefly with theirs, and him sending a smile their way. Left them almost still in place.

They shook themselves back to reality, sending a hasty half-smile in return, gulping down the rest of their cherry Dr. Pepper. He had a girlfriend, Alexis they think her name was. It was long distance, but even still. Plus, what would a charming southern boy want with them?

They got home that night, head clouded with all these conflicting thoughts and ‘ugh’ feelings, (their words, not mine) safe to say their were close to get pissed, and what better way to let out those feeling than through poetry (My darlin’s a literary student ok)

A haiku was their chosen format this time, the words seem to flow almost instantly as they sat there.

“Oh those hazel eyes

Shine caramel-like in hue

Look at what you do”

ALRIGHT IM DONE, I JUST HAD TO GET THAT OUT OF MY SYSTEM—

I FIND CRAZY HOW LITTH OBSESSION I HAVE ON HIM, AND YET HE’S THE ONE I WRITE ABOUT THE MOST

[assim-eu-sou]

Kally's Mashup Liveblogs: 1x1

1:1

I’m gonna be real, being a music major and having heard what pianists have to play at school… I’m not blown away. But no worries, I will suspend my disbelief for the remainder of this program. Like bruh… piano performance majors play music that makes me feel glad I can even follow along with the score and I’M a music major.

I like all the music stiff in the title sequence

NOOOO NOT THE BAD FAKE VIOLIN PLAYING

Ok I lied I’m probably gonna be insufferable in these liveblogs when it comes to music

Are her parents divorced and just good at coparenting?

Ok that’s a nice viola case, one of my colleagues has the same one

Ok I don’t blame them for hating child prodigies… I’ve been on both sides of the equation: I’m a currently child prodigy hater but as a child, I was always the youngest student and it could be very isolating so. Fair for both sides.

Some Spanish is harder to understand than others, and this is on the easier side. I can’t figure out a subs situation but it’s not necessary. Maybe it just feels easy because I’m watching a show in Portuguese right now.

This is all moving very quickly lol

However if you told 13 year old me that I could pack up and go to a conservatory I don’t think I would have hesitated

Her parents must be stronger than mine though because they would never let me lmao

Something alive is in that backpack

Ok I wasn’t expecting a dog for some reason

The dog ate his homework

Oh, she’s the daughter of the staff…. I can stop being on her side because I have definitely been on the other side of THAT equation… nepotism in music is real

Why is the dad such a trainwreck

Instant best friend… what a nice turn of events

Being adopted by extroverts is the best

I know this show will be dunking on classical music and I will just have to accept it… like I get it but there IS classical music that bops. Like what she’s playing now… Beethoven V

Kally said vegetables >

And I have to agree

I have also pretended to be asleep to avoid conversation #relatablemoment

Those boots are cute

Seems like she has a strong imagination

Someone just playing a G major scale in the background

LMAO not Beethoven V as the confrontation theme

LMAO what music school doesn’t let people listen to whatever music… I see we are adding some dramatic effect

Ok I’m TRYING not to be insufferable but I have to be allowed some insufferableness as a treat

Pls give this violist a shoulder rest I beg

At least her piano playing only looks a little fake/forced. I can accept it

I should try adding some beats to something I’ve worked on. I’m definitely not against remixing classical music; it’s a great way to adapt and add new life to something that has been around for a while.

Beethoven V… I have a lot of experience with it… I had to conduct excerpts from it in conducting class a couple times

I keep talking about Beethoven V but the main piece you keep hearing is the theme from Mozart 40

So, final thought? I’m gonna keep watching! My first impression is that it’s easier to get through than Violetta (no offense to Violetta, the pacing in S1 is just driving me bonkers.) I feel like it will lack that tragic/dramatic aspect that all DCLA novelas seem to have, and that’s ok (it just makes headcanoning the characters more engaging). The concept does have its similarities with Violetta, but it’s different enough for me not to be like hmmm. Even if the instrument playing and standards ranges from unrealistic to straight-up fake, it’s fun to see instrumentalists. So stay tuned for more! It’s a little overwhelming to have so many shows on my plate, but mark my words: one day, I will have finished Violetta AND this. Thanks for the info, @supernova-ferro !

[thedeathdeelers]

Julie x Luke Fic

ok i did it

i finished the song inspired fic (my first attempt at writing Juke lols) (also my longest fic posted to date?? over 2k?? what)

find it here on my AO3, otherwise under the read more cut below :)

let me know what you think!

————

i’ll go wherever you will go

JULIE

Saturday morning found Julie wide awake tossing and turning at 7:30am. Which was odd to say the least, as Julie definitely enjoyed a good lie in just as much as the next person.

She tried to go back to sleep, snuggling in deeper under her covers, tucking her hands under her cheek, and even switching positions a few times.

But still nothing.

Finally giving up on sleep by 7:50am, Julie jumped out of bed, planning to head straight to the studio. Her mind had switched on the moment she first opened her eyes, whirling with lyrics and melodies for a new potential anthem.

So she slipped on her large bear claw slippers, and padded her way through the still quiet house, gently opening and shutting the front door behind her.

She slowly walked down the path to the studio, fully aware that the boys would not be back from whatever it is teenage ghosts who don’t sleep do all night.

Julie pushed passed the doors of her mom’s studio, leaving them ajar, hoping to let in the cool morning breeze. She headed straight for the couch, where lay Luke’s (and now hers as well, she supposed) songbook.

She plopped down, enjoying the worn out feel of the leather and the softened cushions, dragging the book over & onto her lap. Flipping it open, she rifled through the pages, humming quietly under her breath, looking at all of the recent songs she & Luke had written together. It was routine for her to do a little recap of their joint material before she reached the empty pages, where she would start on something new.

She was just about to flip past their latest work, paper crinkling under her fingers, when something fell out from between the pages, fluttering to the ground. She looked down, brows pulling together, to find a folded piece of paper on the floor next to her cladded feet.

Curious, and fully aware that she had only just held this notebook in her hands yesterday, Julie leaned forward over her knees and picked up the scrap of paper, and unfolded it.

It was in covered Luke’s familiar scratchy handwriting, covered in words and notes and melodies, just like the rest of their shared songbook (albeit looking slightly more organised). Scratching at her scalp in confusion, Julie brushed her hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear as she brings the wrinkled paper closer for her to read.

But just before she does, she allows herself to breathe in deeply, eyes closing as the scent that is purely Luke invades her senses, enveloping her in a kind of warmth that vaguely reminds her of happy summers past.

She only gives herself a few seconds of self-indulgence, before she pulls the paper away from her face, sitting up a little straighter. Opening her eyes, she focuses on the words in front of her, scanning through the first few lines.

A gasp breaks through the silence in the studio as Julie starts to process the meaning behind the song.

She was reading a love song.

Her brain takes a second to comprehend, and another to fully process and kick in.

A love song written by Luke. And there was a very big chance that it was written with her in mind.

Love songs weren’t entirely a new territory for them - they had experimented with a few ever since they performed Stand Tall. But this one was a fully fleshed out song, with an underlying tone that was so heartbreaking, Julie could already feel her heart squeezing tight in her chest as tears start to push past her eyelids and down her cheeks.

So lately, been wondering,

Who will be there to take my place,

When I’m gone, you’ll need love,

To light the shadows on your face

A sob clawed its way out, breathing ragged as Julie clutched tighter at the piece of paper in her hand, her eyes squeezing shut. He must have written this when they thought they were going to move on.

She presses her free hand, now shaking, against her mouth, failing to stop the new stream of oncoming sobs from breaking out.

Even now, with the boys being physically present in her life, uncertainty still reared it’s ugly head. She would be bobbing her head along to music, working on her algebra homework, or lying in bed scrolling through Instagram, and it would hit. She’d suddenly be very aware of the fear of losing her new found family, of losing him, unsuspectingly crawling its way back up from where it was buried deep down, engulfing her in a haze that wouldn’t let up.

Trying to bring herself back to the present, Julie shakes her head, eyes opening back up. She tries to refocus on the words in front of her, even as her vision continued to blur.

If I could, then I would

I’ll go wherever you will go

Way up high, or down low,

I’ll go wherever you will go

And maybe, I’ll find out

The way to make it back someday

To watch you, to guide you,

Through the darkest of your days

I hope there’s someone out there

Who could bring me back to you

If I could turn back time,

I’ll go whenever you will go

If i could make you mine

i’ll go wherever you will go

“Jules?”

She was so taken by the words on the paper, so absorbed in the world the words were creating, that she hadn’t noticed Luke appearing into the studio.

Startled, she lifts her head, hair shifting and falling back over her shoulders as her eyes meet his.

LUKE

Luke had spent his night just as he always did: Roaming around the streets of Hollywood, constantly checking out new bands, new music - desperately trying to keep up with the music scene that constantly seemed to be changing.

Him and the boys had made a pact that they would always take advantage of their time back on Earth, whether spending it with loved ones (Alex tried to sneak off and see Willie whenever it was possible; Reggie liked to stick around the Molina house, following Ray and Carlos around), or spending it enriching their already deep knowledge of music.

And although he genuinely enjoyed spending his nights exploring the music scene with his boys, Luke always found himself itching to head back to their studio. Itching to head back to Julie. Some could call it pathetic (Alex), but he was over caring.

After having thought that he had somehow lost her, being forced to cross over or join some megalomaniac’s house band forever, he was through trying to act coy. He was head over heels in love with Julie Molina, and that was that.

Which meant that as soon as he deemed it late enough to head back, he left the boys on their way to meet Willie at some singer’s pool, and poofed back home (home. Has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?).

He was expecting the Molinas to still be asleep, hoping he’d be able to get a few hours’ worth of songwriting in before he’d be joined by a sleepy Julie.

What he hadn’t expect was to find a hunched over Julie, sat on their couch looking small as her eyes shone with freshly shed tears.

Luke quickly crossed the space between them, nearly jumping over the coffee table in his rush to get to her. He fell onto the couch next to her, reaching out to grab her hand in his. As was his routine whenever he’d held her hand, his thumb started to lightly trace over her knuckles, trying to soothe her the only way he knew best: by touch.

“Jules? Julie, what’s wrong? What happened?” He searched her face, futilely trying to make sense of the red rimmed eyes and the tear streaked cheeks. He was so preoccupied by the fresh batch that had started to spill over that he hadn’t noticed the cause: the now crumpled piece of paper wrapped up in Julie’s trembling fist.

But Julie would only shake her head at him, staring back with wide and glistening eyes.

Luke shifted, twisting his body to fully face her, extending his free hand towards her face to gently cup her cheek. The need to touch was just as much for her as it was for him. If he had a beating heart, it would be trying to hammer its way out of his chest. He needed something to ground him, to calm him down so he can focus, and nothing did that better than the girl sitting in front of him.

“Do you- do you want to talk about it?” He tried to regulate his voice, making it softer, tilting his head slightly to get closer to her eye level. He’d let her decide if she wanted to talk. He knew from personal experience what it felt like to want to let the tears and emotions pour out, without feeling the need to speak them out loud.

And yet - the lack of reaction on her part was worrying him. She still wouldn’t say a word, not even another shake or nod of the head - just staring at him with a mix of grief and wonder shining from her eyes. He didn’t know what to do with that.

But just as he was about to slide back a little, give her some space, he saw her lift her free hand, fingers curled tight into a fist, holding it up in front of him.

He looked at her questioningly for a second, before the hand that was still resting on her cheek moved to brush at her closed fist. At the contact, her fingers seemed to relax, easing the pressure on her knuckles. She slowly unraveled what was in her hand, dropping it in the palm of his.

As soon as he saw the crumpled piece of paper he understood.

She had found it.

His song. To her.

His farewell song.

He‘d completely forgotten he had hastily slipped it back into his songbook yesterday after their session.

He had planned on leaving the song in her dream box, where she was to find it after they had crossed over - a little piece of him, of his heart, of his soul, left behind for her to hold whenever needed.

But then they had stayed. And hugged. And laughed and hugged some more. And he figured she didn’t need to know about the sad love song he had written her.

So he had snuck back into her room late last night while she was asleep, and quickly grabbed it, shoving it into his songbook, with plans to properly dispose of it at a later time.

Too late for that now.

“Jules - I’m so sorry. You weren’t supposed to find this.” He scratched the back of his neck, song still in hand, unsure of how to navigate the conversation. He let out a long breath, trying to find the right words to explain to her.

“I wanted to leave you something that would always remind you of me - something personal, that no one’s seen or heard before. Just a little keepsake that you could go back to and read whenever you needed it.” His hand dropped into his lap with a soft thud, sound muted by the deafening quiet of the studio.

He chanced a look at her face, to find her still staring at him. Fortunately (he hoped), he could see the tears had stopped.

“I didn’t want to leave, knowing things might have been left unsaid. I figured I wouldn’t be as lucky next time round.” He tried for a weak laugh, but knew it wasn’t going to work. So he tried again.

“It uh- it was in your dream box. I know you said not to go near it, but I swear I just dropped the song in there and closed it. I didn’t snoop. Scout’s honour.” He did a little salute, two fingers held up, despite the fact that they both knew he was never a boy scout. He even tried a little shy smile, hoping she’d react to something. Anything.

And yet, still nothing.

Did she hate it? Did she think he was overstepping her boundaries? Did the song make her uncomfortable? He was starting to panic, even as he still felt her warm hand resting in his.

He let out a deep breath and tried again.

“I’m sorry, Julie, please, just talk to me. Let me know if I made you uncomfortable in any way, I-I-I’ll stop. We can burn the piece of paper and just forget this ever happened just please- say something.” He was pleading her, eyes solely focused on hers as he tried to gauge any type of reaction from her.

“You think I’m crying because it made me uncomfortable?” Her voice was so low, he nearly missed it.

He was not expecting her to start with that. But unexpected reactions were better than nothing.

“I- I don’t know Julie. You’ve been quiet from the moment I poofed in here. I don’t know what to think. But I’m so-“

“Please. Please Luke, stop apologising.” She shook her head, voice hoarse. Her lips twitched at the edges, the first signs of movement on her face since he approached her.

“This song- I-“ She swallowed, trying to dislodge the emotions wedged in her throat. Her eyes flickered from his lap, to the song and back up to his.

“Luke this- this is the most beautiful song you’ve ever written. I haven’t even looked at the music accompanying it and it’s already my favourite piece of music ever.”

Her voice hitched, as she tried to control her feelings. She cleared her throat, continuing.

“I cried because the emotions, the feelings that have been building up for a while now, all came crashing down on me at once. The fact that I really was this close to losing you guys,” she lifted her hand and touched his jaw, letting her fingers trail his cheek. “To losing you.”

Luke lifted his hand, covering hers.

“I’ll always be by your side Julie. I’ll do whatever I can to make sure of it. You know that.” His lips quirked into a half smile, recalling the words he had uttered the night they thought was their last.

“Could you- Could you play this for me?”

That surprised him. He wasn’t expecting her to want to revisit the song for a while. He lifted his brows as he tried to read her clear brown eyes.

“You sure you want to hear it now? We have all the time in the world. We could leave it for another day?“

She shook her head, the first real smile that morning, finding its way on her lips.

“No, I’m sure. I want to hear you sing it while I- while I can hold you close.”

His non-beating heart stuttered at her words, even as he tried to (unsuccessfully) keep the joyfully surprised expression from showing too much on his face.

“Alright.”

He got up quickly to grab his guitar and then immediately headed back to sit down next to his brown eyed wicked beauty.

Hm, that title had potential.

No Luke, focus.

He started tuning his six-string as Julie settled herself more comfortably against his side on the sofa. Her arm snaked its way around his back as she squeezed herself closer, her head coming to rest on his shoulder.

He closed his eyes, trying to savour this feeling, this moment, committing it to memory, before he opened them back up and prepared himself to start playing the song he never thought he’d get the chance to perform.

So lately, been wondering,

Who will be there to take my place,

When I’m gone, you’ll need love,

To light the shadows on your face

He could already feel the tears soaking their way through his shirt sleeves, as Julie’s hand clenched, her arm tightening her hold onto him. He fought through the need to comfort her, willing himself to finish playing her his song. He was baring his soul to her; the least he could do was do it right.

I know now, just quite how

My life and love might still go on

In your heart, in your mind

I’ll stay with you for all of time

He was nearing the end of the song, strumming through the last verse before he reached the altered chorus, bringing his emotions to an all time high. He sneaked a quick peak at Julie, her eyes closed as the tears continued to spill.

If I could turn back time,

I’ll go wherever you will go

If I could make you mine,

I’ll go wherever you will go

I’ll go wherever you will go

And with the last strum of his guitar, the final note softly fading into the quiet of the studio, Luke shifted for the first time since he started playing her the song. He gently moved the guitar from his lap, placing it against the side of the sofa. Turning back around, he then fully enveloped the other half of his soul in his arm, bringing her even closer to her rightful place in his heart.

FIN

[thelittleboyfromloveactually]

Record Store (pt 2)

Thomas Brodie Sangster x reader

Word count: 1989

Part 1

I hope y’all like this mini series! I am having fun writing it, enjoy!

“Hey Y/N!” Jane yelled

Jane was another one of your best friends. You had known her since high school but you became close when you found out you would be attending the same college. Jane is studying to be a pediatric oncologist, at least for now. You were walking across campus from your previous class headed to Anesthesiology. Jane was joining you in this class. You hadn’t really told anyone about you and Thomas because you weren’t sure if he wanted you. And who says there is anything going on, you haven’t even been on a date yet. You could go on this date and then decide he isn’t for you. So you didn’t want to make a big deal about it.

“Hey Jane! Are you ready to die of boredom?” Anesthesiology was not your strong suit nor your main interest. And if you were being honest it was very boring, but it was a requirement.

“Yup i have had so much coffee i think it's going to be impossible to fall asleep this time” she said practically bouncing up and down

You laughed “great!”

“You wanna hang out tonight there is going to be a party, or we could just chill, get some homework done” she asked

Great , now you had to explain why you couldn't hang out. “Um actually i am busy, sorry” you said

“That's fine, what are you doing?” she asked looking at you

“Um work”

“No your not”

“No im not” you both laughed, you sucked at lying “i have a date actually”

“Oh really? Who's the lucky guy?” she asked teasingly

“I met him at Royal Records, he asked Felix where i worked, he came to the cafe and asked for my number. He is taking me to dinner tonight” you said, trying to avoid saying his name

“Cool, who is he though?” she asked

“Um his name is thomas” you said

“Nice! Well you will have to introduce me, and make sure to ask if he has any friends” she said, winking at you and giggling. Oh I'm sure he has friends, you thought, famous ones. “Where is he taking you?”

“Chiltern Firehouse” you responded

“Wow, he must be rich, that's a really nice restaurant, i've never been” she rambled

You laughed nervously, before now you never thought through if you two did become a thing, how hard it would be. He is famous and probably rich, not that you cared you just figured that the public would. You shook the bad thought out of your head and walked into class taking your seat.

After your 4 classes, you went home, or to your dorm. Your roommate, Cleo, was sitting on the couch eating from a bag of chips. You greeted her and went straight to your room. You looked at the time it was 4:13 pm, you had about 2 hours before you were supposed to meet him. Your reservation was at 7:00 but Thomas had texted saying that you could go for a walk beforehand. You showered, did your hair and put on make -up. You ended up picking a champagne colored silk dress that just before your knees. You grabbed your purse and your jacket and headed out the door. Thoms had offered many times to pick you up, but because of the dorms you thought it would be too complicated. You told him you would meet him outside of your dorm building, and then he would pick you up. As you walked out the door of the building you felt a brush of cold breeze hit your face, you smiled. Then a black car pulled up and Thomas stepped out of it.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, love” he said with a smile, he took your hand and opened the passenger side car door for you.

“Thank you kind sir” you said jokingly

“Of Course my lady” he shut the door and headed onto the other side, he sat down and you were off. You loved London at night, all the lights and the people. You smiled as you looked around, you didn't know it but Thomas kept glancing over at you and admiring your beauty.

THOMAS’ POV

She looked absolutely gorgeous. It has been a while since I have been on a date so I hope she likes it. I couldn't help but admire her features as she looked so longingly at the city. She looked at me and smiled, I looked back on the road and smiled too.

“How long have you been acting?” she asked sweetly

I was genuinely surprised that she didn't know, most girls that I go on a date with know more about me than I do myself, “almost my entire life, how long have you been wanting to be a doctor?” i asked

“Since highschool. I have been exposed to a lot of medical stuff my entire life. My dad was a surgeon. And I just want to help people” she said fidgeting with her hands

“Oh nice! Would you like to play some music?” i asked handing her my phone

“I would love to” a few seconds later back in black came on and she started mumbling the lyrics. I smiled, she was adorable. Throughout the song her words became more clear and I was able to hear her voice. It was beautiful. She even made the roughness of the song sound smooth and angelic. I kept looking over at her, I couldn't help it.

About 5 minutes later I pulled into the valet parking lot. I walked to the other side, opening her door and helping her out. We walked across the street to the park that was lit by some street lights. We had about 30 minutes to kill before our reservation.

“So Y/N, tell me a little bit about yourself,” I asked her. I was honestly intrigued by her. I wanted to know everything.

“Um well what do you want to know?” she asked as we walked along

“Anything really” i responded, still looking at her

“Well as you know i am a med student at cambridge, i went there for college too, i actually graduated top of my class.” she said proudly

“Wow, that's awesome! You're pretty smart huh?”

“Ya i guess you could say that, how about you? Why did you decide to become an actor?” she asked

I looked ahead “well my parents where theater actors, i also didn't always like school so acting became a sort of escape”

“That's sweet, why didn't you like school?” she pushed, my hand was swaying net to her as we walked, our fingers brushing occasionally

“I guess I just struggled with reading especially” I gave in. I put my hand into hers slowly, her hands were cold. She looked at me and I smiled, she smiled back. The conversation continued, and we kept walking until it was time to go inside.

NORMAL POV

They escorted us to our table and we sat down. It was a very nice restaurant. There was classical music playing in the background, you could hear the sound of forks against plates and wine glasses clinking together.

“Bonjour! How can I help you today?” the waiter asked, you could hear the french accent in his voice, you decided that you would try to have a conversation.

“Bonjour, je pense que nous allons juste prendre un verre pour le moment” you told him that you were just going to order some drinks for the moment. The waiter smiled, you looked at Thomas, his mouth was opened in surprise. You giggled

“Great, what can i get for you, we have a very nice champagne that just came in if you would like?” the waiter suggested

“That sounds great, is uh that ok with you?” thomas asked

“Yup” you nodded

“Ok we will take two glasses of that please, thank you, oh and some waters” thomas said

“Of course i'll be right back” the waiter left

“Sooo,” Thomas started, “you speak french huh?”

“That's really cool, i took french in highschool but im afraid its all left me now” he said leaning closer to you

“Shame, we would have secret conversations” you said giggling

Thomas loved to laugh, it sounded so happy.

A few minutes later the waiter came back with your drinks. You both ordered your food which was brought out shortly after. The food was very fancy, and very good. After you finished Thomas paid and escorted you back outside.

“Would you like to go get some ice cream?” he asked putting his hand in the small of your back

You nodded “that sounds amazing”

The two of you walked down the street hand and hand. You both were adorably nervous. Both you and Thomas had red cheeks. The ice cream shop was adorable.

“Hi, what can I get for you today?” the girl at the counter asked

You looked at Thomas, asking permission to order, he nodded encouragingly.

“Hi! May i please have the lavender honeycomb please” you said politely

“Yes, and for you sir?” she asked

“I'll have the same” thomas said taking out his wallet

You smiled at him

The girl handed you your ice cream and the two of you left. You licked your ice cream cone happily.

“How is it?” asked thomas

“Amazing! Thank you so much” you said

“Anytime, this had been really fun” he said his eyes scanning over your face

“Yes it has” you said smiling at him

“Oh um you've uh, you have some-” he tried to show you where on your face the ice cream was but you couldn't seem to find it

“Did I get it?” you asked laughing

He laughed “uh no, here um, may i?”

You nodded, his thumb brushed under your lower lip, revoking the ice cream. You felt the butterflies return.

“There” he said

You blushed smiling, “thanks”

“Your very welcome” he said smiling back at you

You finished your ice cream and walked back over to the car. The car ride back to your dorm was filled with laughs and singing. You could seem to stop smiling, and neither could thomas. By the time you got to your dorm it was late, but you didn't want to get out of the car. Thomas opened the door for you and helped you out. He walked you to the door of the building

“I had an amazing time tonight” he said

“Me too, we should do this again” you said

“Yes, yes we should” it was quiet, he moved a piece of stray hair behind your ear

“I never told you how beautiful your voice was” he said looking into your eyes

You blushed “thank you”

“Ya” was all he said before his lips were on yours. His lips were soft and moved perfectly with yours. His hands move to your hips, pulling you closer to him. You noses brush against each other. Your heart began to race. The two of you pulled away, both in need of air.

He stared into your eyes, and pecke you lips one last time

“good night Y/N” he said in a whisper, he still had a tight hold on you

“Good night” you said

He looked down and let go fo you, he turned to walk away, but he didnt he didn't even make it 3 steps before he was turning around and coming back to you

“Maybe just one more kiss” he said, bridging your lips to meet him again. You smiled into the kiss. This boy would be the end of you. Then, too soon it was over, he broke apart and smiled

“Bye” he said with a slight laugh

You giggled ��bye”

He walked away looking back at you, before getting into the car. You waved him off. Then when he was out of sight, you squealed. Maybe there was hope for you two yet.

[alexlabhont]

I didn’t mean to fall in love with you

Chapter eleven

Book: Queen B - Choices (Universe)

Pairing:  Poppy Min-Sinclair x Trans!Male MC (Beck Hughes)

Genre: Canon re-write (Because I can)

Rating: Anyone can read it, really

Tags: @dopeyouth @theymakemegayer @save-me-the-last-dance @poppysmc (If anyone want to be tagged in or removed, just tell me)

This is me trying to write by and for the Trans community, specially FTM community, meaning, trans guys, but I actually took the liberty to use They/them pronouns for everyone out there who´s interested (Also, the name Beck was the most neutral one I could find, trying to use the cannon Bea Hughes)

If you have any comment, PLEASE BE RESPECTFULL and patient with me. This is also my first english fanfic and english is not my mother language, so… i’m sorry fo the grammar errors. I also installed recently Grammary, so… hope its worth it.

This chapter contains some sensitive topics about tragedies and sex insinuations, I really didn't want to write it down with details both out of respect. I mean, personally, I didn't want to explain what's "under" in a fanfic, but if you do have doubts or curiosity, ask away in chat, especially if you are starting hormones, there is a lot for you to know about down there because it definitely changes something. Also, this other topic might touch a nerve and I really didn't do it without respect to the victims, so I'm sorry if it feels like that.

Previously

----

Staten Island it’s the third-largest borough in New York, but it is the least populated. The northern part of the island is the most urbanized, with some areas of somewhat decayed housing blocks that didn’t attract attention at all. It was… ok? quiet? She wasn’t sure exactly what to say about that place, but what was another thing she wasn’t sure about? Well...

“Are you not going to tell me what are we doing?” Poppy asked once again, feeling irritated as they both walked through the breeze but warm streets. At first, she thought they were taking the bus but Beck asked something to a random guy and started walking for a really, really long time, what was all this about? Beck looked tense, kind of nervous, and that alone made her feel strange, unnerved. "Are you alright?" Poppy asked again, but this time she sounded worried.

"Yeah, I'm just…" They exhaled in an attempt to draw their nerves away from themself. "I'm pretty nervous. I've never done this before." Beck chuckled.

"Do what?" Poppy frowned, curiosity floating in her mind strongly, to be honest, she had never seen them so tense before, even though they were trying to look calm. Beck smirked and took her by the hand.

"Come on, I have to show you something."

"Is it too far?"

"Are you already tired?" Beck replied, mocking her with that sassy smile of theirs.

"Me? Absolutely no." She said, raising an eyebrow. "I could literally go for miles."

"I'll have to prove that myself." Beck winked and she couldn't help but laugh.

"You're a dimwit."

"Yeah" they shrugged. "I'm cute, though.”

“Barely.” She rolled her eyes, trying to suppress a smile but failing in the process so Beck laughed at it. Suddenly an unexpected drop felt swiftly in her nose, making her look up to the sky where a big, grey cloud was still above their heads. Soon, she felt raindrops in her hair, her clothes, her shoes!

“Oh, shoot. This is not good…” Beck said while they both walked faster, reaching out for cover in a shop awning.

“You think? These Jimmy choo are not even in the market yet!”

“Well, we don’t want them to be ruined, don’t we?."

"Of course not! What kind of dumb ques—"

Poppy didn't get to end the sentence, Beck took her by the wrist and started running full speed and nonstop. "Beck!" She screamed, the rain pouring down her body while that asshole laughed like a devilish kid. "Beck Hughes, let go of me this instant!!"

"We're almost there!" She heard them saying without turning to see her.

"Where are you taking me?!"

Beck slowed down little by little until they both stopped in front of a tiny, old, yellow house with barely two floors. Beck took the keys out of their pockets and opened the door, allowing Poppy to get inside the dark and quiet place.

“So… here we are.” Beck spoked turning on the lights.

The place that received them was the living room, but it was not an ordinary living room, it had neon lights currently exposing a purple color, a keyboard piano, a couple of guitars, and an old-fashioned mended couch with a lot of patches over black leather that actually looked really well together. The walls were exhibiting posters, framed cool landscape black and white photographs, and a Youtube silver plaque. She recognized the place right away.

“Wait… this is the place where you record your music.” She asked. Poppy watched Beck’s videos a lot recently at first the blonde was searching for information, then, to find a flaw to criticize with Chloe, but sooner rather than later Poppy found out… Beck was actually a really good musician, so sometimes when she was completely sure she was alone she’d listen to their songs while doing cardio or homework or whatever she was doing. “I was wondering where you found the location.”

“Yes… but also no. I mean, I do the videos here, but I have an audio booth upstairs. It’s actually a quiet neighborhood so it came in handy.” Beck took off their jacket, reaching out their hand to ask for Poppy’s. They both were wet, but not a lot, her shoes survived perfectly because they entered the house before a loud thunder sounded, followed by a deluge. “Damn, we do really dodge a bullet out there.”

“Yeah.” Poppy said, hugging herself. Without her coat, she felt a little cold. “Do you own this place?”

"No, this is my uncle’s." Beck whispered with reverence and a sad smile on their face. "My dad's little brother. He passed away."

"I— I'm sorry, Beck…" she managed to say, clueless about what exactly would someone do in this kind of situation.

"I didn't remember much about him, but my mom says he used to make these guitars out of plastic bottles as gifts for me to play them. She said I would go to the kitchen and play one for her to hear. She also said the sound was awful and she begged him to stop making them." Beck's smile was soft, turning on the heating, proud even though they were chuckling a little, spreading the same smile to Poppy. " 'I'm telling you, this little pal has talent.' he would say."

"Sounds to me like he made it to annoy your mom instead." Poppy said jokingly.

"Totally, he was a prankster." Beck replied, the emotions coming out from their eyes were difficult to tell. "And was one of the few dudes back at Farmsville that didn't want to settle down. The black sheep in every family… and the reason why my parents didn't want me to be here." Beck clutched their jaw, walking away from there to the kitchen. Poppy followed them in silence, feeling like it was something very private for Beck, seeing that vulnerable side of them again, but not hiding this time. "He was murdered years ago here in New York in a shooting. In Farmsville shootings don’t happen, so… They said it was dangerous going out of the farm to the big cities. That he brought this on himself... Took this out of the wrong way." The anger in Beck's voice was palpable in the air.

"Seriously? How can they be so selfish?" Poppy asked, how can someone be so fucking self-centered and dumbass to take a tragedy and blame it on one family member? She thought these things happened exclusively around that bunch of tight-ass people inside her parents’ social circle, but not inside a family farm.

"Back at home is different from here. Is a small town where everyone knows each other. They love routine and hard work and the good customs and shit… So when anyone goes against it… well— it's not funny."

Something clicked inside Poppy's mind.

"But then… How are you here?" Beck smiled but it didn't reach out to their sad eyes.

"Because I almost got killed."

Shock. Poppy couldn't help but feel agitated, her heart pounding loud against her chest and that same protective feeling that almost made her stab Bennett crawled its way towards her own core.

"What?" Poppy babbled, froze. Beck shrugged, with a weird grin as if they didn't know where to start, they caressed their neck, searching for the better way to put the puzzle together. They reach out for Poppy's hand, and she took it right away intertwining her fingers with Beck's.

"Coffee?" They asked. "It seems we will be stuck in here for a while.”

"It sounds nice." The words abandoned her mouth so fast that she even surprised herself, another red alarm ringed inside her mind, but now was not the time, so she ignored it again. Beck smiled and turned on a little coffee maker, bringing two mugs in silence. They both sat down on the surprisingly comfortable couch, Beck’s eyes were attentive at the black drink and the tension was still over their shoulders, she could see it so easily that Poppy wished for someone to take that weight out of Beck, so she took both cups and put them aside, sitting over Beck’s lap and intertwining her fingers with theirs, playing with them. Beck smiled a little and took a deep breath.

"I started to realize something was off inside of me when I was in high school. I mean, ‘till that day I was considered normal. I was the kind of child that played sports, climbed trees, and did hard work gladly. You know, average farm kid." Beck said, but even as they seemed to be calm, Poppy could feel the sweat in their palm, and a little shivering all over their body. "But I grow older and changes came, and puberty and—"

"Hey" Poppy stopped them from talking faster and faster. "You don't have to"

"I want to. " Beck interrupted, begging Poppy with their eyes. "I want you to know my past. I mean… if you want me to tell you, that is."

Poppy could have thought anything at that moment. She could have thought that she made it, that she had accomplished her very goal and knew she was about to have first-hand information to use against Farmsville, that she was spectacular for making it this far. She could have thought that now nobody would take her number one spot from her, or that she loved to have a new puppy to use in any way she wanted. But no.

All in what she could think about was Beck's heart opening up to her, trusting her for real this time. The connection intertwining both of them in a way that made her skin chill. Third alarm, but she muted it again.

"So? What are you waiting for? Go on." Poppy rolled her eyes, Beck had a goofy expression for a couple of seconds until Poppy smiled, squishing slightly their hands for reassurance. Beck's eyes glowed happily in which was the cutest gesture Poppy saw from someone that wasn't a dog in her entire life.

"I managed to handle myself a little for a while, but it definitely didn't last long. I was so afraid, I felt lost, and insecure. I didn’t know what was happening to me, why did I feel that way, trapped in my own skin... I stopped having friends because everyone could see how weird I was and nobody wanted to talk to me, except for this one girl: Bree Matthews."

Beck’s jaw tightened, their eyes wandering all over the place because of the nervousness.

“So, Bree and I started to hang out. Chill some time round. We were close, I mean, really, really close. She was the one who I told about my dysphoria first, and she was totally supportive. She helped me understand what I was going through, sometimes she would borrow her brother’s old clothes to give them to me and helped me pick my very first short haircut. Bree was my safe space in a town where I’d be mistreated just to use a bathroom. I kinda felt for her… so one night into the forest I kissed her. And~ it wasn’t a good idea.”

“What happened?”

“Well~ Daniel and his gang came into the picture and intimidated her, so she sold me as a pervert, a weirdo, among other… awful things. Can’t blame her, Daniel was a wrecked truck whenever he wanted so… yeah. My family found me eight hours after, all beat up from head to toes. I was unconscious and with an actually broken rib.” Beck tried to joke, but it was so bad at timing it actually made it worse for Poppy to hear. “I~ I almost die.” Beck sighed, as if with that they could put all that behind. “Anyway so she apologized to me through a phone call because she wanted to kiss me too but, you know, shit happens; I got better and now I’m in New York doing what I love so… Happy ending, right? It was funny, they didn’t let me use the bathroom but they all thought I was “male enough” to beat the crap out of me ever since.”

Poppy stopped playing with Beck’s hands, making them do the same. They told the end of the story so lightly as if they were talking about a T.V. show they just watched and not some really cruel harassment they went through for a long time. The strawberry blonde was a lot of things, bad things, but the things that beast did to Beck just because of their dysphoria? That was a whole new level that Poppy would never stoop into.

“How can you joke about things like that?”

“Well, I figured I had two ways to address the problem: Being insecure or making the most out of this. That’s why I do music. Yeah, my songs don’t talk about the transgender community directly, but I make sure everybody knows who am I. What I am. I write songs for people out there that feel just the same as I do. Not only transgender people, but the whole LGBTQ+ also needs representation! Folks having their back! And if I can reach at least one soul and show them that no matter how they were born, they can make it… Hell, I could die happily.”

The fire in their eyes, the passion radiating strongly from their body, from their words. It was impossible for Poppy to look away from Beck. Of course, Beck didn’t care about a spot in the T list, or and stupid award. Beck was more into their music, making their voice be heard. That was why they did claim to care less about competition, Beck was climbing their way to the top because of their conviction and resilience. It was curious how the more she learned about Beck, the more she felt drawn to them.

“You are so brave, do you know that?”

“And it only took me a delicate rib and trust issues.” Beck claimed proudly as if it was a bargain.

“Trust issues? Beck, you’re one of the most confident people l know!” They began to laugh, the blonde could feel their laughter below her because of the slight belly-shaking. “It’s irritating.”

“I am really amazing myself.” Poppy rolled her eyes at the flirty smirk Beck flashed towards her. “But I’m not insecure about myself… most of the time. I do have a hard time trusting in people. I mean, Daniel didn’t have a hold on me… Bree, on the other hand…” Beck shrugged. “But I do trust you, Poppy.”

Something inside the blonde felt off, those words accompanied by that good-natured smile made Poppy feel a bit guilty. Like, yeah, she was just trying to archive exactly that for her own benefit, it should feel like a win, right? But no.

“You haven’t done anything wrong, yet.” She said to herself. “For all we know, this is just some casual date.”

Maybe… give up? Maybe actually try and date Beck?

What could possibly go wrong?

“I trust you too, Beck.” She replied without a doubt. So she tossed her golden locks over one shoulder, leaning down to kiss Beck’s lips. She soon felt them kissing her back, sweetly, calmly at first but then it was obvious they both needed more than that. Poppy let go of Beck’s hands to place hers in their Beck, while they grabbed her by the waist. The heat soon took over her body, especially after they responded to it by biting Poppy’s bottom lip, making her moan. Poppy knew right away there was a change in Beck’s behavior, they were more confident, more secure, they actually felt ready and she had to say, that was a very welcome and pleasing development. But they were shaking still.

“What 's wrong? You don’t want to—?”

“No. No, it 's not it. It 's just…” Beck took a deep breath avoiding Poppy's gaze for a second before looking at her pleading while keeping hold on her. “I don’t want you to see me differently when you look at what I have beneath the clothes.” They confessed.

“I won’t. I promise.” She said, caressing the hair in the back of their nape. “This is just you, with all letters.” She smirked, trying to lighten the mood and she succeeded. Beck grinned from ear to ear, relieved, kissing her passionately, hungry and the Poppy did the same, tasting their tongue with hers. The caresses between the two became more intense and she couldn’t stand the fever growing anymore, so she took the edges of their favorite black t-shirt and pulled up, revealing Beck torso for the very first time.

She understood right away what Beck meant. Cutting through their chest there it was a thin, darker line, a scar that was slowly healing, but nevertheless it was there easy to pinpoint. It was strange, she had seen a lot of those mastectomy scars on google but Beck chest looked different somehow, strong, gym crafted, and the scar actually was interesting, sexy even.

“I don’t know what you were so scared of, Hughes. Hell, you’re hot as fuck, I hate you.”

Beck chukled, their confidence coming back.

“Yeah, well… There is not an ugly part on this body afterall.” They grinned.

“I’m going to erase that obnoxious smirk of yours.”

“You will?” Beck grabbed a hold on Poppy’s hair and pulled slightly but demanding backwards, exposing her neck to them to kiss and lick, causing a shaking sigh that turned the heat even higher for both. “Show me then.” They whispered over her skin, their breath brushing bristling her body.

Poppy pushed them down on the couch, kissing them hardly. This was war now, and she would definitely win.

----

Next

[miracu-ace]

Feel you here beside me

Happy holidays @chloe-bourgeois-is-big-gay! As your secret santa, I’ve written you a Lukanette story featuring the soulmate AU, where soulmates can feel any intense emotions that their soulmate’s feel. This went through several re-writes so I apologize for cutting it so close to the deadline, but here it is!

@mlsecretsanta

For Marinette, there were many times growing up that she doubted whether or not she had a soulmate. She couldn’t recall ever being overcome by a strong emotion that wasn’t directly linked back to how she herself was feeling. But according to her parents, everyone had one some were just more obvious than others. 

The first time she actually noticed a difference, Marinette was working late on a school project. She had been spending hours staring at a blank screen in the hopes that inspiration would strike and she could complete her written report before it was due the next day. But nothing would come to her. All she could think about was the overwhelming stress of turning in another assignment late and disappointing both her teacher and her parents. The stress alone had her spinning in her computer chair.

On the verge of giving up, Marinette covered her face in her hands. She could attempt to go to sleep now and maybe get up early enough to actually be able to focus in the morning or she could push through in the hopes something would come to her. Granted she had a bad habit of sleeping in and at this rate, it seemed like she would even if she completed the assignment.

Gradually she felt a soothing wave wash over her. And her shoulders relaxed. And her thoughts were no longer racing. And she didn’t feel so hopeless. And then just calm.

It was as if someone were draping a warm, soothing blanket over her shoulders. As if she was feeling someone else’s emotions, someone like her soulmate!

A gentle sigh escaped her lips and Marinette sent a silent thank you to her soulmate. Whatever they were doing they were managing to overcome her emotions with their own. The thought alone helped Marinette relax, finally knowing that she wasn’t so alone like she had feared. There was someone out there that could match her stress and overpower it with a sense of calmness.

For a moment Marinette lost herself in thought again. Guilt. Her soulmate would be around her age of course, but would they already have grey hair? Aside from Marinette, who else could handle her daily stressors? Between running late to school, staying up late working on homework assignments, and everything else, how could someone else handle all this random stress? 

Her dad had even mentioned how before meeting her mother, he would stress bake whenever he felt any intense emotion from her.

Marinette almost laughed when the wave of calmness came back. Subtle at first, but still effective. As if her soulmate were trying to soothe her fears once more.

“Ok, I’ll take the hint,” Marinette whispered to herself. “Thank you.”

A small smile formed on her lips as she began typing out her report.

“Someday you will have to tell me your secret to staying so calm.”

~~-~~

The day that Marinette became Ladybug, she started to worry in the back of her mind about her soulmate. It was one thing to have the weight of Paris on her shoulders, but now she was giving that stress to someone else without any of the necessary context.

Through all of her interaction with Stoneheart as Ladybug, Marinette couldn’t feel her soulmate’s soothing calm over her own feelings. Which in turn only enhanced her fear and self-doubt. Even with Tikki and Chat Noir, she felt alone again.

All until Alya was trapped by cars as Stoneheart went on another rampage. The desire to help Alya overcame her worries and she accepted the ladybug miraculous. Just as the magic of the suit was washing over her, she could feel the wave of calm again. Mixed in there was a hint of relief that Marinette was overcoming her own doubts and a sense of pride for her.

~~-~~

So much worry. Luka wasn’t sure why, but his soulmate was stressed beyond belief at the sudden introduction of akumas. Her emotions before now were nothing in comparison. More than anything, he hoped she was safe.

Normally in times like these, Luka would strum his guitar and play a soothing melody. One that would break through his soulmate’s stress and help her calm down, but now he couldn’t seem to break through to her. 

Not until Ladybug seemed to show up again. As soon as he had seen her on TV zipping into action, Luka imagined his soulmate found some relief in the superhero. She was still doubtful, but Luka took it as an opportunity to play his guitar and focus on sending soothing thoughts to her.

Confidence answered him back and Luka smiled to himself. Whatever had happened to his soulmate during Stoneheart, they were safe now and seemed to be more confident in themselves now.

“I’ll have to thank Ladybug for this someday.” Luka thought to himself as the ladybugs washed over Paris.

~~-~~

The day Luka became Viperion, he began to understand what made a person lose themselves in self-doubt. The weight of a miraculous was a heavy burden, but Luka also found it to be a source of power. While his soulmate handled her emotions better after Stoneheart, there were still times when he could feel her concern grow during a particularly powerful akuma. As Viperion, he could take a more active role to help his soulmate.

Every time Ladybug came to his requesting assistance in her and Chat Noir’s battle with the akumas, Luka was quick to accept her offer.

~~-~~

“Ladybug!” Viperion called, his freehand laying over his Miraculous. “Are you alright?”

Winded, Ladybug took a deep breath and gave herself a moment to collect her thoughts.

“I’m fine. Just taking a breather before I rejoin Chat Noir in the fight.” Ladybug called back, turning her face to look at Viperion.

Even from a distance, Viperion could see the crease in her brows, made all the more evident by her mask.

Doubt. Fear.

Suddenly, Viperion’s mind was clouded with his soulmate’s emotions.

Without thinking about it, Viperion moved his hand away from his miraculous and pulled his lyre from his side. He began to strum his fingers along the strings. While he usually enjoyed the comfort of feeling his soulmate’s emotions, as if they were always next to him, he couldn’t afford to lose focus with so much on the line.

When he played music like this, Viperion liked to imagine that his music conveyed the words he wanted to share with his soulmate even if they couldn’t hear him play.

Ladybug was surprised as she watched Viperion play his lyre. As Marinette, she had heard him play his guitar before, but not like this. Through the instrument, it was as if Viperion were having an intimate conversation with someone.

At the same time, Ladybug could gradually feel her soulmate’s feelings wash over her. Their feelings calmed her nerves and Ladybug could feel her confidence growing once more. Reinvigorated, Ladybug wound up her yoyo before propelling herself back into the fight with Chat Noir.

A sigh escaped Viperion’s lips as he felt his soulmate calming down. He slipped his lyre back on his side and held his free hand back over his miraculous, prepared to call second chance if needed.

~~-~~

“Thank you for your help today, Luka.” Ladybug smiled, “You did a great job.”

“Of course,” Luka replied, placing the snake miraculous in her outstretched hand.

With the snake miraculous back in her hands, Ladybug prepared to send off her yoyo before hesitating for just a moment.

“I was curious”, Ladybug started until Luka interrupted her.

“About why I was playing the lyre?” Luka couldn’t help but laugh, “It’s an old habit I picked up. Usually, when my soulmate would get stressed out in the past and I could feel her emotions spiraling out of control, I figured out that I could play my guitar and help her calm down. I’ve always been pretty calm so I always worried my soulmate would feel alone, but at least this way I know they can feel me silently supporting them.”

A shy smile made its way onto Luka’s face and Ladybug couldn’t help but blush in return. She felt a swelling in her chest and she wondered silently to herself if her soulmate was standing in front of her now. It would make sense after all. Who else could handle emotions like that than Luka who was always so calm and relaxed? What were the odds?

Ladybug wanted to ask more questions, but the beeping in her ears reminded her that she was limited on time.

“Your soulmate sounds like a very lucky person.” Ladybug smiled, “I hope you get the chance to meet them soon if you haven’t already.”

With those words, Ladybug sent her yoyo high into the rooftops above before giving a sharp tug and flying into the sky after it.

Luka watched as she disappeared, feeling a likewise similar warmth in his chest and wondering idly if it was his own feeling or his soulmates. Or maybe both.

[this-is-my-main-i-follow-from]

I already wrote this post, but I’m coming backk up to the top to put a cut bc it’s p long.

my brother is singing falsettos out loud & I’ve already had a stressful day bc I’ve done nothing (lack of structure & lack of productivity gives me really bad anxiety) & he’s either singing out of key & out of time, or it just sounds really bad without the music. He’s the only one who can hear the music bc HeadPhones. & also the falsettos is probably really bad for my mom bc she’s mad that dad left her, esp bc the house is a mess & stressing her out & she needs to go grocery shopping & he used to do that “but now he doesn’t because he stopped loving [her]”, so my bro singing fucking falsettos is really bad. I can’t cook supper bc I don’t have a recipe & the stuff is still frozen & idk what kind of dough I should make & besides the kitchen is a mess & he won’t fucking clean it. I mean it’s also partially my fault bc I’m a lazy adhd mofo, but it’s his job today & my job to cook. I need to get into the kitchen & cook before mom & my OTHER brother get home from shopping but I can’t bc he’s just drawing & singing & the singing is so annoying- I was trying to listen to a thing but I couldn’t fricking hear it bc adhd auditory processing disorders, it didn’t have fucking subtitles or anything & it was not great audio quality & I couldn’t differentiate between the words he was singing, & I couldn’t hear the quiet parts when they overlapped with his singing. I wasn’t going to write all of this I was just going to say that his singing makes me want to cut myself, but apparently there’s a lot more to it. also I don’t want to end up cooking while mom is home bc I don’t have any drawings on my arm & mom is fucking nosy & wants to see my scars so I have to work extra hard at hiding them but even with ppl who arent nosy, like my little bro I don’t like them out, but the longer my older bro sits there fucking yelling out of key, the longer I’m delayed & I won’t be able to cook. By this point, I won’t even be able to cook the meal I was planning on, I have so much shit to do I’ve missed so much & I’m so behind, but I’m so incapable of doing anything like i can’t do chores bc I use the excuse I have homework but I never fucking do my homework so I’m also behind in school & even with the stuff I like like dnd & writing & violin I can’t do, & I skipped online kung fu & I’ve been slacking off under so many excuses but I’m just being lazy & anxious & I also gained so much weight & it makes my body feel so bad & i know this isn’t my body’s happy weight & being fat makes my boobs bigger & I’m fucking trans & I hate them I even tried cutting them off myself & ended up waiting 15 hours to go to the hospital so that I wouldn’t make mom suspicious (& they put me through triage really fast bc apparently I did a lot of dammage- I was planning on giving myself stitches, but my icepack melted & I couldn’t numb my body anymore so they’re lucky I even went to the hospital, it was bad bc I had to walk 20 minutes either way weighted down with a fucking toolbox & I waited outside in the cold bc my phone died & thus:) mom found out anyways so I lied to her about going to buy drugs bc obv /that’s/ a better idea than telling her I went to the hospital & SHUT UP UNNAMED OLDER BROTHER ok he’s between songs now. If I told mom I went to the hospital she would ask why & be like “y didn’t u tell me�� & “r u cutting urself again” & like yeah bitch I have been for a while ik the social worker said I should tell you a codeword, but I don’t do that bc u blame yourself or cry or want to talk about & I yes I fucking cut myself what of it? Yeah I tried fucking removing my own left breast, bc u arent’ supportive of medical transitioning, at least not when they’re ur kids. Ur mad at dad bc he got a tattoo bc it’s  body modification & thus uncatholic, but u’ll support ur catholic university friends gettin gtheir eldest daughter a reduction bc her boobs are big & painful- bitch what’s so different about me? I went so far as to try giving myself a reduction, you say you’re concerned about me mutilating my body & making bad decisions, but, you know what? because of this I have legitimately mutilated my body, & made a dangerous & bad decision. isn’t autosurgery proof that I need top surgery bc it’s a danger to my life if I don’t get it? The government is able to pay for it I think & bc it’s a danger to my health (& i get pain & I can’t work out & I get back pain & my skin pulls & hurts & if I jump my tissues yank my skin & it hurts & it puts so much strain on my back, & binding gives me pain, so I need a reduction as much as your catholic university friends’ daughter does) I should be abe to qualify. Even if I don’t qualify yet & have to wait two years, at least that would be the start of two years now instead of in a long time, I mean, mum, you say you want me to talk about it & you’re afraid I’m rushing into it? guess what? They are too! the healthcare system will make me do a bunch of shit to qualify, & tbh, I think that they are better qualified to talk to me about surgery & what I really want than you.  Fucking finally, I hope my brother is done his play & finally shuts up. TA MA DE FUCK NO HE’S STARTING AGAIN CROWS DAMN IT CROWS CROWS CROWS & MAGGOTS I”m not even gonna be able to make anythiung for supper & i have no ideas besides the long one which I don’t have time for anymore. fine. whatever. I’ll go SH in my room. I won’t even work on fanfic bc I’m too fucking adhd & broken. I fucking hate it when ppl say “we;re all a bit adhd” like no bitch shut the fuck up, we all struggle with the things adhd ppl struggle with sometimes, but adhd is a neurological condition that makes those struggles so commonplace & intense that it affects our everyday lives. & no. adhd does not mean we’re more creative. Even if we do have more likeliihood of coming up with funky ideas, most of us struggle to articulate them or understand them, or we forget them as soon as they come. you’re not adhd bc you’re a little more creative, youre just an ableist asshole & fuck you. adhd isn’t creativity its’ a fucking disability. I’m directing this at those fucking parents who have the lovely nd daughter who gave me a hug, but you two are motherfuckers. Yeah I get thaat adhd, once you learn how to mannage it, can be useful, & I understand that part of the reason this disability is so hard is bc society isn’t designed for it (like a lefty using right hand scissors), but ot’s still fuxking REAL & if you can’t deal with it yet, it 100% is a disanbility. OK? Ok. I had smth I was going to say earlier, but I got distracted by smth else that made me mad, so I never got around to it. Youo know what I love? I fucking love how tumblr has next to no character limit so I can just type as much as I want. You know what I don’t like? I’ll probably get deactivated by some SJW maggot-eaten crow-fucker who thinks that my rant& mentioning my failed ed & my self harm (oh fuck shut up, my brother is chanting “dumb”) so anyways some fucking sjw fuck-hole will report this post & my blog & I’ll be deactivated for simply getting angry on tumblr. It’s fucking tumblr! You used to be able to say whatever you needed to say! But now, esp us ppl w EDs, have no safe place to talk about our issues (at least, not w/o fear of gettin gterminated for “encouraging” EDs, when we’re just trying to help ourselves). Anywasy, sorry for all the swears & go se, I swear when I’m mad. I’m gonna go do smth, idk what. Can’t be anything productive, Can’t even be unproductive stuff I like, like watching youtubem, or smth cathartic like playing fiddle. I might just go & bleed a bit & ignore everything for a while. I nkow that the world will still be stressful when I get back, & I’ll still have to cook, & I’ll still be behind in school, & mom will still be broken-hearted over dad, but I’m feeling calmer just thinking about it so that’s what I’ll do. 

[drivingsideways]

Based on this excellent post and tags  by @frankdelfino, and thanks to @rain-hat yelling in the chat window for twenty minutes, here’s a not-fic outline in the universe where Jo Yeong and Jo Eun-seop are actually brothers. 

So here's how this goes. This is RoK verse, monarchies are passé, thank you for coming to my TEDtalk.

- Jo Yeong and Eun-seop grow up middle class, and look like peas in a pod, have completely opposing personalities and can generally be trusted to get up to the WORST POSSIBLE SHENANIGANS ever known to a pair of long-suffering parents who've had the temerity to have not one, but two sets of twins. Anyways, Eun-seop is absolutely the one GETTING them into the shenanigans, and Yeong is the one getting them OUT of it, despite the fact that Eun-seop is older by 4 minutes

-Eun-seop loses a year at school when he gets into an accident at 14; a drunk driver, a bicycle, and Yeong just a little too far away to do anything but call the ambulance and hold his brother's hand right until they force him to let go as they rush Eun-seop into surgery. He holds it again, once he's wheeled out, and right upto when he wakes up so he doesn't wake up alone (he hasn't gone home in 48hrs, I'm fine, thanks eomma, you should go home to the babies, they'll be scared without you.). Anyways, Eun-seop wakes up, demands to know whether he'll have a cool scar from the surgery (before he demands to know whether he will be able to walk again) and Yeong's like you're never going to be as cool as me, now shut up and sip this water slowly.  Eun-seop recovers, and Yeong's there through every single physio session and taking extra notes in class, and recording videos surreptitiously, so Eun-seop can see how all their classmates are faring and also failing at everything, now that they're in first year of high school. (Yeong would have stayed back a year at school, but Eun-seop forbids it, and uses his Oppa-pass, which he only uses when he's really serious about something, so Yeong has to listen)

- Eun-seop notices that some of his videos begin to feature a rather weird looking dude, who can be seen hanging out with this one girl. Eun-seop knows Tae-eul noona, her dad runs that taekwondo academy two blocks away, right? And there was that one time when Eun-seop was being bullied and Yeong wasn't there that day, and noona had stepped in and scared those assholes away. Anyways, so yeah, he also remembers that there was this other guy with her, who'd also clearly been ready to throw down, if those goobers had put up a fight, but later, he just grabbed noona's hands, checked for injuries, and given Eun-seop some candy that he got out from his bag.

Anyways, so Eun-seop is like why do you have pictures of Tae-eul noona and her weird boyfriend, and Yeong snatches the phone away and mutters, THEY'RE JUST GOOD FRIENDS, in all caps as though he knows anything about life or girls.

Oh my god, Yeongie, he says, you know she's way out of your league right? She's a senior? And like would absolutely beat you to shit, wouldn't need her weirdo bf to do it either-

HE'S NOT HER BOYFRIEND, Yeong says, loudly this time, as loud as the time when Eun-seop had replaced his hair cream with toothpaste and Eun-seop quickly recalibrates and gets it right this time, and he says, hushed,  Yeongie, my Yeongie, did you manage to fall for the one dude who'd give you a run for your money in "the person most likely to end up a serial killer" stakes?

He starts cackling so hard that his ribs start to hurt, and then his back, and Yeong (who's run away – RUN AWAY) doesn't come back to help him up. It's alright, Eun-seop will live, and also, he's gonna help his Yeongie get his guy, even if Eun-seop cannot see the attraction, and he thinks this isn’t going to work for many reasons, only one of which is that CLEARLY this dude- Kang Sin Jae, he remembers now- is in love with Tae-eul noona, which, props, anyone might see she absolutely kicks ass.

But the point is, the Jos are fighters, and he's damned if he's going to let Yeong slink away from this one.  

The next time he sees Yeongie- two hours later- they all have a bedtime in the Jo house, ok- he's like, fine, I'm sorry, and I KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE A SINGLE USEFUL THOUGHT IN YOUR HEAD, so I got this for you, ok?  What do you know about him?

Turns out, Yeongie has a whole folder on him.

Eun-seop's proud of his little stalker baby brother.

Anyways, that's how Yeong learns enough about sound systems so he can turn up for the post when the school band that Kang Sin Jae plays bass guitar for advertises for a sound engineer.

He turns up for the "interview" in his neat trousers, and button-down shirt and Sin Jae says, uh, are you Jo Eun-seop's non-identical twin? Aren't you just a freshman, do you really- and Yeong says, quietly, confidently, I can solve that problem you're having when you play your arrangement of The Wizard and Sin Jae stares at him and mutters, but can you do anything about how only three people turn up to listen, and Yeong tilts his head, and says maybe? Also, Eun-seop and I are identical, just fyi.

Anyways, yeah he fixes the faulty wiring in the speakers at the auditorium, and also gets more than three people to turn up (so what if it's all a bunch of scared looking freshmen? They've all been paid more than enough to bang their heads in time to the music and cheer later.)

But he never does ask Sin Jae out, that entire year, even though these days, Sin Jae smiles when he sees him, and puts an arm around his shoulder sometimes, after a practice, what are you waiting for, Yeongie, did I raise you to be this much of a coward? Eun-seop wails, but Yeong is like, Sin-Jae-ssi would feel awkward at having to refuse me if I did, and he needs a sound engineer more than a boyfriend, and that's fine.

(He needs at least three shirts more, a hair-cut and perhaps better taste in music, Eun-seop thinks, but doesn't say, because he knows Yeongie's fragile like that. Yeongie can take anything anybody says about him, personally, and will brush it off or dole out appropriate punishment, but if someone comes after someone he loves, he'll break the knees of the person and leave them for dead in a ditch. And obviously, he can't do that with Eun-seop, so Eun-seop doesn't say anything, he's a good elder brother.)

- Sin-jae and Tae-eul noona graduate and both of them go off to KNPU, and Eun-seop says, listen, nobody does that if they're not dating, at least. IF NOT ACTUALLY ILLEGALLY MARRIED. Yeongie, please, for the love of god, find a boy who's available. See, here's a list.

But Yeong just shrugs, and says, let me see your homework (because Eun-seop's back in school now) and then proceeds to put red slashes through everything and says, "apply your brains Eun-seop, don't act dumb when you're not". THE AUDACITY.

Yeong never dates anyone through high school, Eun-seop dates a different person every month.

- So Eun-seop is never going to have to serve in active military duty, because of his accident, but Yeong will have to. He's fine with that, and he'd rather do it in these two years, just after school, because that way, it's only really one year when Eun-seop will be at college before him, and that's fair, it evens out Yeong's having to graduate from school first.

-So off he goes, and there he meets Lee Ji-hun, who's an ass, Eun-seop clocks that straight away, born into some goddamn chaeobol family, but for some reason drawn to actual military service, because he has a hero complex. The only good thing he has going for him, as far as Eun-seop can tell, his that he took one look at Yeongie and decided that he was the best boy in the whole universe, and that shows good taste, Eun-seop will be polite to him, fine.

- Of course, the other thing that happens in those two years is that Yeongie gets brainwashed into joining the Navy- it's not brainwashing, Yeong tries to tell him, I get to protect the people I love, the country I love. And of course, Lee Ji-hun, fucking asshole, is just sitting there, nodding along as though any of this was fucking REASONABLE. You could DIE, Eun-seop yells, DO YOU REALIZE THAT. WE'RE STILL AT FUCKING WAR.

Yes, says his stepford-wife brother, womb-sharer, soulmate, exactly.

- Anyways, off Yeong and Jihun go to join not just the Navy, which would be bad enough, but the ROKSWF, that's insane, they're going to die, and what can Eun-seop do then but go join the NIS and immediately get picked for North Korean Affairs by an astute senior officer who listens to Eun-seop goofing around in the canteen on the orientation day and still get everyone to give him their portion of the only decent thing on the menu- the crème brulee- and says, I'm taking that one.

- It's a lot of paperwork and dull as ditches monitoring work at the start, and that's ok, Eun-seop can live with that, it means he gets time with the other twins, who are at a fun age. And that's how Tae-eul noona and Kang Sin Jae re-enter their lives because Eun-bi and Kka-bi are learning taekwondo from Tae-eul's dad. This is also how Eun-seop meets the love of his life and future wife Myeong Na-Ri, and it's ok if she doesn't know it yet, at least Yeongie is not here to see him turn into a complete doofus everytime Na-Ri so much as breathes in his direction.

- Yeongie and Jihun come back on shore leave (AFTER TWO GODDAMN YEARS) and that's when Ji-hun meets Tae-eul and falls like a ton of bricks for her; she manages to keep her sense of balance and also life in order, thanks, she's not going to fall for some floppy haired dude (his hair grows really fast out of its crew cut) who thinks that parallel universes are a thing, even if he has extremely long legs.

Meanwhile Kang Sin Jae has also cleaned up nice, Eun-seop will admit, and he's-he's a genuinely nice dude, ok, even if a bit brusque, and when Eun-seop finds out about eomeonim's gambling problems and that whole story, he's willing to admit that he may have been a tad harsh on Kang Sin-Jae way back when.

Anyways, that's the past, right, Yeongie, I can't imagine what a bunch of men locked in a submarine can possibly do except have orgies, please tell me that's what you've been doing? Please?

"Shut up" hisses Yeong, and then practically jumps out of his chair when Tae-eul noona and Sin Jae come over to their table at Na-ri's coffee shop. Yeong's in his uniform- he was on his way back from some conference thing he'd had to go to despite his leave- so that was the saving grace, because Eun-seop sees the subtle double-take Kang Sin Jae does,  because let's face it, his baby brother is the most beautiful, it's true, but then Yeongie is also red in the face and says "toffee" instead of "coffee" as in "Won't you get some toffee, Sin Jae-ssi?" and Sin Jae gives him a blank look while he decodes that, (gay panic, Eun-seop wants to tell him, my brother is a panicked gay, go easy on him), and finally says, uh, I don't think they have that flavor here?

- God, Eun-seop says later, I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU, BABY BROTHER. HAVE YOU BEEN IN LOVE WITH THE SAME BOY FROM HIGH SCHOOL? ARE YOU STILL A VIRGIN? (AFFIRMATIVE ON BOTH) and Eun-Seop has FAILED, FAILED, FAILED. Alright, he says, taking a deep breath, how long do you have?

Two weeks, says his stupid fucking brother, and so Eun-seop has to go into EMERGENCY-FUCKING-MODE because he may have to DIE getting it to happen, but his baby brother is GOING TO GET LAID, AND BY THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE, EVERYONE'S FIRST TIME NEEDS TO BE SPECIAL OK, Ji-hun? Ji-hun nods, very seriously, and proceeds to describe his extremely un-special first time, and Eun-seop is like, wow, you probably don't know this, because you've got that puppy face that make people not want to hurt you, but every single woman you've ever slept with has faked an orgasm with you. Well, that discussion gets pretty heated, of course, and also comes to an abrupt end when Tae-eul noona pops in- she's come by to ask if they all wanna hang out and watch a movie this weekend- and look, noona's GREAT, and obviously the first person he needs on his ally list as soon as he makes sure she's not really in love with Sin Jae, because that would be bad.

"Hyungnim?" she says, surprised, when he asks, because Eun-seop knows the best way to get noona to answer anything is to play no games, and she says, "No, why?" and then, suspiciously, "Did that rat Jihun put you up to this?" And he says, absent mindedly, no I was asking 'cause Yeong, and noona yelps, "Jo Yeong can't be in love with me, shit!" and Eun-seop says, what, why, and that's how he finds out that hey, Kang Sin Jae may also have been a little into his idiot brother from way back when. "He was too young" Tae-eul noon confides, "Sin Jae didn't feel right about it, especially when he was graduating that year" and honestly, THIS IS THE SADDEST STORY EUN-SEOP HAS EVER HEARD AND HE'S WATCHED TITANIC FORTY TIMES AND CRIED EACH TIME OK?

- RIGHT. So maybe Eun-Seop and Tae-eul manage to get their idiot friend and brother a little push in the right direction. Well, noona basically goes to Sin Jae and says, for fucks sake, ask the poor boy out, I heard he's still a virgin for you.  And Sin Jae goes red in the face, and then green, because omg the PRESSURE, and then red again, and then ultimately does find Yeong one day at the coffee shop alone, as Eun-seop had assured him he would be - (Diligently reading some book? A recipe book? Italian recipes? Sin Jae may have mentioned one day that his favourite cuisine was Italian?)- and there's some part of him that melts, like the cheese on the cover of that recipe book, and he's like, uh, do you, maybe, and then rushed, I know this great Italian place, if you like, and yes, Jo Yeong would like very much.

- Jo Yeong returns to Jinhae Naval Command very much not a virgin, and Jihun returns still single, but undaunted by the task ahead of him; don't worry, Yeong-ah, he says, confidently, I'll wear her down, even if it takes me years, and Yeong knows Jihun, he knows how much of a barnacle he can be, and also it wouldn't be nice of him to shit on other people's happiness just when he's found his own, so he nods and says, yes, of course, and even listens to Jihun rhapsodize about Tae-eul noona's everything for about two hours straight. He texts Eun-seop at the half-way mark- kill me now, please-and Eun-seop is like, what's North Korea there for, then, I told you to dump his ass in the sea. But of course he won't, Jihun and he are ride or die, and it turns out dying is more likely in this case, because right about that time is when North Korea decides that it needs to remind the world that yes, they exist, and yes, the men that rule them are crazy fucks.

- What happens is this: Koo Seo-Ryeong is a brilliant pianist, who's one of the few DPRK citizens who's let out to see the world has disappeared with her mother and sister, while she was on tour in Australia. And look, she did it in Australia, it has nothing to do with RoK, except that Kim Jong-un has decided that it has, because her (estranged) father happened to be one of the top honchos in  DPRK military brass, and this was all clearly a conspiracy hatched across the border to get at him and the military secrets he knows.

- Eun-seop is there when the news comes in that there's a Sang-o class submarine in the waters at Jeongdongjin, and he's also there when it turns out, that yes, hello, they were trying to get the Koo family out, and he's also the one that gets a single line text from an unknown number that's the code he made Yeongie swear on everything they held dear that he would send if he was going behind enemy lines. Shit. Shit.Shit.

- OK, I confess, I don't know how this next part goes, reader, because I am not John Le Carre or whoever, and this is still NOT-FIC,  BUT SPY THINGS HAPPEN and at the end of the day, Eun-Seop has to choose between saving his brother and letting the Koo family back into the hellhole they'd just managed to extract themselves from, and listen, noona made him listen to Koo Seo-Ryeong's playing ok, and there's- even if she were a shitty musician, even if she were just some rat bastard politician or a fisherwoman- he knows he can't make a choice that is sending her back to her death, and the deaths of everyone she loves. And if he did, and if he did, just to save his womb-brother, his true love, his soulmate, his blood and bone and heart- why, he knows that Yeong would never forgive him, Oppa-pass or no. So he's gotta rescue Yeongie and save the Koo family AND STOP WORLD WAR THREE, good thing he's totally up to the task.

- MORE SPY THINGS HAPPEN AND HE SAVES THE DAY, OK.

- He does, and so this time he gets to be the rescuer, and honestly, this was a big one, and it totally evens out all the 15 million times in their entire lives that Yeong had rescued him, what does Yeongie think? Yeongie thinks he should shut up and let him sleep, and because he's a good oppa, the best oppa, Eun-seop curls around his baby brother in their too narrow bunk bed, just like they did when they were sixteen or ten or five or in the womb, and goes to sleep too.  

[oh-theatre]

Livin’ It Up: Chapter 1

Chapter title: An Abrupt Beginning

A/N: Me ? Hating every single thing I write?? BUT OFC GOD I HATE THIS SO MUCH IT SUCKS AHAHA. Im so frustrated, I couldnt get Logans end rant to work and its stupid and I just hate everything i hate this i hate my writing hnnng. Can you believe i took an ok concept and and FUCKED IT UP

words: 2614

summary: Roman throws yet another party, and his only true hope for the night is someone to show up. Patton finds himself disturbed, and Logan needs to stop drinking. 

pairings: Eventual logicality, eventual prinxiety, eventual demus, eventual Moceit (Which then goes back to Logicality and Demus)

warnings: Swearing, alcohol, underage drinking, drinking, parties, kissing, throw up

Ao3 Link  

“Thank you, for coming to this party with me” Virgil repeats once more, combing through his hair for the fifteenth time. Patton chuckles from his bed, neatly sitting as he flips through his book, writing down notes in his book. “Have I mentioned thank you?” Virgil jokes, Patton nods, biting his lip as he crosses through a difficult section.

“The golgi apparatus provides transportation-”

“Pat! Shouldn't you be getting ready?” Virgil turns to him, the cheerleader stops chewing the end of his pencil, a sweet smile as he shrugs. He closes his books, stacking them neatly on his shelf, everything organized. Once his homework is tucked away into the right folders and his pencils are safely back in his pencil case he moves to the mirror.

“I'm good to go” He says flopping back to his bed, Virgil scoffs. “Virge, these parties aren't anything formal. As long as you've got your phone, clothes and a swimsuit you're good” Patton assures, Virgil nods sitting on the bed, his shoes lacing as he hums. Patton adds his final bow, putting his boots comfortably on. “Ready?” He questions, Virgil sighs patting his jeans.

“I guess”

~~~

“Hey sorry Cindy you mind if i borrow Logan?” Roman taps on the girls shoulder, she sighs pulling away from Logan's mouth. He waves her off grumpily following Roman into the kitchen. “What's that? Third one tonight?” Roman teases, setting up the snacks

“Fourth” He corrects picking his teeth. “Carter, Fiona, Marty and Cindy” He sits on the stool, stirring his drink, the remaining ice clinking delicately.  Roman wants to push but fears a drunken argument before his gathering so allows Logan to pour himself more of whatever murky drink he had been guzzling down. “Mm, why must we have these soirees” Logan mumbles, spinning around.

“Its a party Logan, i've been attending and hosting them for ages!” Roman argues, he sighs finally finishing his set up. “Look just dont make out with too many people, I don't need a million girls crying at me at the end of the night because they thought you were the one”

“They know im gay right?” He sips, adjusting his glasses.

“Do you know youre gay?” Roman retorts, a glare is his gift in return.  “Why do you do it then?” Roman inquires, moving the pair through the already bustling house.

“Its fun” Logan shrugs, Roman pauses snickering as he carries the chips. “Not fun, but its something to do. Mind numbing and does not require actual intellect” Logan slumps on the couch almost instantly finding himself lip to lip with yet another poor and emotional victim. Roman rolls his eyes walking away from the mess. The door continues to open as more people file in, soon the familiar scent of alcohol and booze fill the air and Roman finds himself taking the tiniest sips from his own drink. With every creak of the door, the slightest hope lights up the man.

Come on

Just walk through the door

Please

~~~

“Do I drink, do I get a drink, what do I do? I got this” Virgil rambles, Patton chuckles, shaking his head. Closing the door behind him he guides Virgil into the kitchen, serving him a club soda. He takes it, almost finishing the entire thing, the sweat dripping his anxiousness for miles. “Thanks, ugh why am i here”

“Because I invited you” Roman chimes in, Virgil practically chokes back his drink, being rescued by Patton. “I'm really glad you're here Virge” Roman smirks, Virgil nods through his ever increasing reddened face. His eyes land on Patton, a slight regret but a neutral respect is shared with a nod.

“Ill be by the pool if you need me” Patton whispers, taking his leave, into the rioting house.

“How are you?” Virgil decides, Roman closes the door behind them chuckling as he closes the distance. “That's not an answer” His nerves seem to calm as his ‘radiant’ sarcasm takes place. Somehow his annoyance for Roman returned, his defenses lifted. “Nice house, mind giving me a tour?” He dances out from the ever closing gap Roman entraps him in, a slight scoff of amusement but the teen obliges.

“Well this is the kitchen, an original model and renovated around 5 years ago” Roman demonstrates, Virgil nods finding it actually quite interesting. A serenity falling over him as he takes this moment to breathe. “Over here is the hallway, leading into an assortment of rooms” He explains, Virgil identifies a name plastered on each. “You've got the bathroom, an office and our library still in its original condition from 1875” He hopes to impress the young teen. Knowing Logan, when he was still fresh, found the room the most enchanting thing.

“And where's your room?” Virgil teases, knowing this apartment was enormous in its own right.

“Upstairs” Roman replies, Virgil bites his tongue. Upstairs, god this apartment was huge. “And downstairs we have the pool and some storage. Nobody really uses the pool to be honest. Mostly people seem to hang out in the living room or-”

“The other living room?” Virgil points as they come into yet another opening, flashing lights, loud screeches and many drunken dancers. Roman and him share an amused laugh.

“Care for a dance?” Roman nudges, Virgil scoffs, taking yet another sip of his drink. Finding the teen to be serious he can't help but allow this to fuel his laughter more.

“Me? Dance? Oh that's not the issue...it's dancing with you..” Virgil carries on, Roman rolls his eyes dragging him onto the floor. Slow but upbeat movements take place and...what's this? Is Virgil having...fun?

~~~

The light splashes and ripples of waves as Patton let his feet dangle felt calming. No part of him missed the chaos upstairs, sure freshman year this kind of thing was at least slightly intriguing. But the parties and the drinking grew tiresome and well...annoying. At least now he knew his way around, no one went near the pool, it restricted them.

So, with his bubbling soda by his side, and his book in hand he just sat. It was almost peaceful, the moon found its way through the window, the muffled sounds of music were present and the water felt cool to the touch, reminding him he was there.

“Are you reading?” A slurred voice requests, Patton squints up watching Logan tumble into the space. His feet repeating a crass and heavy movement.

“Are you tap dancing?” Patton hides his giggle. Logan shrugs dropping what seems to be his hundredth red solo cup of the night. Roman makes it a point to never give him glass ones or anything fancier seeing as his tendency to well...destroy grows heavy.

“Trying to” he continues, practically falling over himself, the pool and him soon to become very familiar. “Why are you reading at a party, it's a party or a social gathering and while reading is generally an enjoyable activity it deems itself unsocial and a bore when surrounded by peers and other things to spark your brain” He rambles, Patton forgot how fast the teen could talk. Logan had not been to debate in awhile. “Captain of the cheerleading squad, I would presume this is exactly your type of event” Logan staggers forward a bit more.

“Observant” Patton mumbles, returning his focus to his book, flipping through the pages happily.

“I mean I did happen to notice some of your team was present” Logan continues, Patton nods.

“Yes, I saw you and Brianna grow very close, I think a spring wedding” Patton jokes, Logan furrows his brows clearly scanning his already jumbled brain for the person in question. “Red head, wearing the green sweater and jeans” Patton reminds, Logan snaps a flash of excitement.

“Ah yes! She was fun, well okay, better than most people I suppose.” He sighs, finally finding himself a ground, he breathes. “I want to swim, so with my capable body and sane mind I shall” He deems, Patton looks up catching Logan as he removes his shirt. Now Patton wasn't invisible and he wasn't one to deny that Logan was well...fit. Hearing the splash as Logan falls into the pool he returns to his book. The water makes a plethora of noises, moving around the pool growing close to Patton. “You're intelligent” Logan pops up, Patton's gaze moves to him. He's closer now, fiddling with the water around him.

“Thank you?” Patton wonders, its random but he thinks its a compliment.

“Straight A’s, you skipped your junior year” Logan lists, Patton knows all this but he hums along, no harm in listening. “Captain of the cheerleading squad, student council president and vice president to the drama cabinet” Logan moves closer, Patton finally understands.

“So this is how you do it?” Patton kicks a tiny bit, the water flicks melting back into the pool. “You root out their accomplishments, find yourself impressed and then suddenly head over heels for you” He laughs, Logan hates the weird sense that floods him as the delicate sound sweeps the room.

“Photographic memory” Logan shrugs, leaning back as his hair washes over, drooping with thick water. He advances, curious as Patton continues to neglect him and read his book. “Im not wrong am i?” Patton shrugs, his eyes averting Logans prominent gaze. “Why dont you get in the pool? Why come down to read and sit with your feet in the water when your body could be submerged, are you so bored?” Logan pushes

“Just here for a friend” Pattons short and quick responses bother Logan, something about their manner itches him. He moves closer, finding himself close enough to feel the warmth upon his tingling skin.

“What, may I ask, are you reading?” Logan inquires, peeking over. He attempts to take the book, the world was his to own, why should this book be any different. Patton pulls away and soon the pair commence in a playful game, Patton tugs his book away as Logan fears no boundaries and continues to close the space between them. Grabbing as fast as he can to try and see what might be so much more interesting then Logan himself. Finally it slows and the pair eyes lock, Pattons arms retire and his body relaxes allowing a mutual agreement to both move closer and lock lips with one another.

He couldn't deny that the hype is not valid, he was a good kisser.

But even with Logan's hands meeting his own, and the perfect way this felt…

This wasn't Patton.

He pulls away, resting his hand on Logan's chest. A tender but bittersweet look to a pouting Logan.

“Sorry Moreno, but I'm not going to be one of those girls or boys” He smirks. The shock runs from Logan's face quickly as he pretends to fall hurt back into the pool. Patton stands finding the clock has run its course, and the night comes to a close. Gathering his things, stepping over Logan's mess, with no looking back he makes his way upstairs.

~~~

“Did you atleast have a bit of fun?” Roman hopes, Virgil and him having reconvened in the kitchen.

“When you were not stepping on my feet?” Virgil teases, pouring himself a much needed glass of water. “Yeah I had fun.” He rests, giving a somewhat anxious Roman a reason to breathe. They seemed to keep their proximity to one another, Virgil leans comfortably on the counter.

“Well good…” Roman whispers, not really paying attention as hes much more focused on the small details placed around Virgil's face. The sweet dimple of his sarcastic smirk, the poorly hidden under bags sleeping below his stormy and ebony eyes. The soft yet controlled way he kissed him-

Hold on…

They pull away both utterly confused by how this night had proceeded.

“You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that…” Roman fiddles with Virgil's hand, ignoring the sweat from both.

“Me too” He smiles under his gloom “I think we’re just drunk” Virgil searches for an excuse, he knows the reality. He's been around long enough.

“I'm not drunk, are you?” Romans voice remains soft, Virgil shakes his head. The only drink he had consumed was club soda and water, both becoming aware as they push on his bladder. “I've had a moderate amount of drinks” Roman cant talk apparently, his ability to communicate normally and with his typical charm had clearly left him. Disappointed at his failed attempts.

“I should go” He decides, Patton appearing in the doorway only furthering that choice. Roman pulls away, biting his lip as he nods. “Thanks for inviting me”

“Thanks for coming” He replies, turning to Patton “Both of you” Feeling Virgil slip away, joining Patton. With a timid smile and wave he watches them link arm, rest tired heads and disappear.

~~~

“Are you going to help clean up or sit there and threaten to throw up?” Roman bites, exhausted he organizes and cleans up the remains of his celebration. Logan groans, his head pounding wanting nothing less then to be useless and contain almost zero information.

“He was different, and I don't understand why or how but he was. He was witty and he said no.” Logan begins, Roman yawns knowing what course this was setting him upon. “But I like him and not just I need to win over him but truly like him. I don't like this feeling, but it wasn't a done deal” He speaks, his words making no sense worrying Roman. “I kissed him, kissed him, and I do that. I truly do. I find some brief and fulfilling satisfaction from performing such an action but when he decided against it I felt not..that” Roman nods, processing his vague and ranting words. “Its not that hes cliche and that hes different but it was, he didn't care, this wasnt a game to him or some quick fling or an experimentation it was nothing” He scrambles hard for an explanation, all this thinking hurting his frail state. “I don't know what I feel, I don't understand and I don't enjoy that. I like understanding, I do, I know things, I'm smart, I got it..” This was Romans cue as soon as the self-doubt and irrationality set in, Logan needed to shut down for the evening. “I don't know what I'm talking about, who was it...Patty? Marlene...maybe Connor” he ponders, his trail of thought gone.

“Your fathers coming home tomorrow, we should get you rested and ready for his meeting” Roman reminds, leading a hyper and ranting Logan to his room. He moans as he falls to the bed.

“I loathe the idea of my father returning, I wish not to see him or meet with him. Its the same thing as always, and I don't mind, I've accepted my path but why must I be continued to be reminded of my lack of freedom and set future. I don't care, I have no qualms but to have to constantly be pushed further sparks a rebellious thought in me and I wish-

“I will smother you with my pillow Logan” Roman interjects “Go to sleep, you'll be back to your normal, cold, and uncaring self in the morning” Logan rolls over, clutching to the pillow beside him “Nothing will matter and you'll have become familiar with at least three new people by noon” Roman decides

“Mm...I very much hope you are correct in your predicament” And with his final words Logan falls into a deep sleep. Roman after much cleaning, passes out in his own manner, sprawled on his bed, hating the night and the way it went.

[rhubarbbaby]

Strawberries and Art 2

Jihoon x Y/N

Genre: College AU, Fluff Word Count: 4,2k Summary: Like every passionate art student, you spend most of your time immersed in your drawings and paintings. The day you meet Jihoon, your everyday life suddenly gets a lot more exciting...

All chapters: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5

Chapter 2

The rest of your day had passed in a blur. Time had seemingly stopped making sense after you had met Jihoon. You tried to go on with your day as usual even though the world seemed to have readjusted itself along its own axis. Love at first sight was certainly nothing you believed in but the question whether a thing such as “crush at first sight” existed, did cross your mind more than once.

Your brain continued replaying the short conversation you had had with him over and over again. It was as if you had temporarily lost all control over your train of thoughts. You were not oblivious that the sudden change in your feelings was because of Jihoon, a boy who was still a stranger to you, nothing more than a fleeting encounter. And even though you were aware of all those things you still could not get yourself to stop thinking about him. Suppressing your thoughts did not work; you even caught yourself doodling some human outlines that suspiciously seemed to resemble him.

In the afternoon you had realized that concentrating was an impossible quest so you simply stopped fighting it. It took you between two and three seconds to come to the conclusion that, yes you did have a crush at first sight on Jihoon, and (god damn it) you couldn´t wait for the party tomorrow to see him again.

The next morning you woke up to three unread messages from Jo.

Jo: “You still up for the party?”

Jo: “I´ll come pick you up at 8.”

Jo: “Oh and I asked Hansol about Jihoon :) From what he told me he seems like a really great guy. Also he says Jihoon is this super talented songwriter which is just incredibly hot if you ask me…”

Oh my god.

You: 8 is perfect.

You: You talked to Hansol about it?? Jo!!! That´s so embarrassing.

You only had to wait a few minutes for her answer.

Jo: Don´t worry. I didn´t tell him you fell in love at first sight ;)

Jo: See you at 8

You: I´m not in love with him!!!!!!

Thinking about the party filled you with anticipation which had an accompanying taste of a mixture between nervousness and uncertainty. You knew that your brain was probably just overreacting, likely Jihoon would turn out to be boring, maybe even rude and you would have forgotten about him by tomorrow. But it has been a while since you had been as thrilled meeting a boy as you were now and you wanted nothing more than for him to turn out to be the person you imagined him to be. Another problem was, of course, that you didn´t have the slightest idea how you would start a conversation with him. You had never been the type to approach people just like that, especially not people who were as hot as Jihoon.

The party wasn´t until the evening and your thoughts were still circling around him like a moth searching for light. You knew you had some assignments due next week that you wanted to continue working on and so you made the conscious decision to stop letting your thoughts distract you, not until 8 at least. But it is not easy to lure a moth away from light; some would argue that it is sheer impossible.

You were finished with your art history homework at about 5. Somewhere far in the back of your head your mind tried to remind you of the portrait assignment which would have to be finished in a week.  You knew the assignment would make up 30 percent of your grade and you didn´t even know who you wanted to draw yet…But you really did not want to think about that right now. A certain person seemed much more important at the moment. Also you still needed to pick an outfit for the party.

As you stood in front of your wardrobe, you suddenly had to giggle. The situation, you were in, reminded you a bit too much of one of those overly cheesy, almost ridiculous romantic movies. Of course the poor innocent girl didn´t know what to wear to the party her crush was at. Because you absolutely did not want to fuel the cliché any further, you quickly decided to put on simple black pants and a t-shirt you really liked. Finding a suitable outfit wasn’t too difficult, you thought.

Maybe it really was because your pants seemed to be a bit scratchy, or maybe it was because you had looked at yourself in the mirror once too often and had noticed that the back pockets of your pants were making your butt look weird. Whatever the reason for your decision, you changed your black pants for a pair of jeans in the last moment. Possibly, some of those cliché movie scenes were not as unrealistic as you had thought.

Jo: I´m here! I´m waiting downstairs.

You: I´m coming.

Downstairs you hugged briefly to greet each other. “You look pretty! Is all this for Jihoon?” “I´m only wearing regular jeans!” you replied with a smile on your face, your tone slightly outraged. “I know. I´m sorryyy. I´m just so excited already. Hansol told me some things about Jihoon and I think the two of you should marry.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “JO! I don´t even know him!” “Not yet!”

Hansol would be waiting at the party, which meant you had the ten minutes’ walk to exchange essential information. According to Jo, Jihoon was a music student just like Hansol but while Hansol had an understanding of rap and hip hop, Jihoon was considered an exceptionally talented songwriter. Hansol had apparently got to know him because they had to do a school project together last semester.

Your anticipation was now growing with every step you took. Going out was nothing unusual for you, normally you weren´t nervous or overly excited though. On a normal evening you would have met up with Jo, the two of you would have had too many sugary alcoholic beverages and then you would have danced until your feet were going to give out. Not that those normal evenings weren´t fun, but today was different. Today was different because for the first time in months you were looking forward to talking to a boy. Your heart starting beating a tiny bit faster when you could finally hear the dull music of the party that was already in progress.

“Ok, listen. I thought about it. When you see him, I think you should walk up to him and tell him that he owes you a drink because of that strawberry.” “Jo! You´re crazy! I´ll never be brave enough to do that.” “With an attitude like this you won´t…just saying. I really think you should give it a try. You can´t just hope he´ll come up to you …” You hadn´t thought about that yet. Yes of course you were aware that you might actually have to start a conversation but in all of your carefully arranged, delicately placed fantasies, it was always Jihoon who approached you. The possibility that he might not even intend starting a conversation with you was not something you had considered. A wave of anxiety swept over you. It felt like waking up in a bathtub full of cold water, which once used to be comfortingly warm when you got in. You definitely didn´t know enough about him to be invested in a hypothetical relationship that might never become reality. You needed to slow down. “You´re right. I´ll try to talk to him.” “No you´re not just gonna try. You´re going to do it.”

Hansol was waiting at the entrance. “Good evening, ladies.” He grinned. He hugged you before pulling Jo into his side and giving her a kiss on the forehead. “Let´s do this!” you smiled while trying to sound confident but you knew Jo was able to hear the pinch of uncertainty in your voice.

“I´ll go get you two something to drink.” With these words Hansol had left to find alcohol. Looking around the room you tried to orientate yourself. You have never been here before but it was obvious you were at a frat house. Hansol had mentioned some guy called Jackson Wang who apparently was the host of the party. You had never heard of him before but he was apparently really good at hosting parties, the people around you seemed to have a lot of fun.

Even though you would never have been able to admit it, not even in front of yourself, your eyes started wandering across the room searching for him. And just like in one of those exaggeratedly cheesy romantic movies, the ones you thought so little of, you discovered him immediately. He was standing far back in a corner where he was talking to some people. Yesterday you hadn´t noticed, you had probably been too busy staring at his face, but he was very small, which was funny because in the few seconds you talked to him you had found him to be quite a bit intimidating. Not in a bad way, he simply seemed to take up more space than he needed which was probably due to the way he carried himself.

“I see! You found him already,” Jo ripped you out of your thoughts. “Come on! Go over there and say hi!” “There are so many people with him. I´d rather wait a little…” “Fair enough. Then let´s go dance!” she smiled and pulled you with her onto the “dance floor”, which technically was just the living room.  A few minutes later Hansol joined you again and gave you both drinks. “I´m going over there to talk to some friends. Is that alright?” he asked directed at Jo. She just nodded and gave him a short kiss before turning back to you. You immediately downed your glass to build up a certain level of alcohol, which you wished would help you speak to him at some point. You normally did get drunk fairly easy and so you could already feel the slight effect of the alcohol in your body after the first glass. After the third one, you and Jo could finally dance unrestrainedly and even though your gaze wandered over to him every few minutes you still lost any kind of tension you were holding in your body. God bless alcohol.

“Hey I have to go to the bathroom. You coming with me?” Jo asked. “Sure.” You held onto her shirts so you wouldn´t lose each other in the crowd. Slowly you made your way through the masses of sweating, dancing bodies. The bathroom was in the back so it took you a few minutes to arrive there. Jo immediately disappeared behind the bathroom door while you waited outside. You leaned against the wall and for a second you did nothing more than just breathe. You looked up at the ceiling and took deep breaths in and out. You could feel the alcohol in your body and the cool wall on your back gently pulled you back into reality.

“You came.” The voice tore you from your state of utter peace. The music was loud, you could feel the bass in your body, everywhere people were screaming at each other to make themselves understood, the voice that had caught your attention was comparatively quiet, calm and seemed to be very close to you. You couldn´t be sure that the sentence was directed at you, still your gaze shot to the side to see where the voice was coming from. Jihoon stood close beside you, also leaning against the wall. He was smiling at you expectantly. It was similar to yesterday, right off the bat your brain started to absorb his features. Every line, every mark, every twitch of muscle, no matter how small. For a moment (which lasted far too long) you simply stared at him. Fuck, what did he say?

“Yeah..” you managed to stutter an answer just before the situation drowned in a blend of an embarrassing and awkward silence. You were still looking at him, doe eyed, not knowing how to act further. Jihoon just chuckled and in that moment you could´ve sworn it was the most beautiful sound you had ever heard in your entire life. “Why are you laughing?” you couldn´t help but grin back, his smile was contagious. “It´s just…you look cute when you don´t know what to say.” As soon as the words left his lips, your body literally catapulted itself into shock. Did he really just call you cute?? You were probably just lost in thoughts again, surely you were just daydreaming. Your eyes did not leave his face, you were certain you had misheard what he had said but his smug, maybe even a bit arrogant smirk told you otherwise. You were still lost for words. It must´ve been seconds and you still hadn´t answered…

His smile was fading a little. “Hey sorry if I overstepped any boundaries, I know we don´t know each other yet, also I´m a bit drunk.” Now it was your turn to laugh. “It´s ok. I think you´re cute too.” You had not even the faintest idea where your sudden confidence was coming from (you would probably have to thank the alcohol for it tomorrow morning). “You think I´m cute, huh?” he asked, and you couldn´t help but wonder again how he could be so fucking hot. The hands in his pockets, his collarbones peeking out slightly above his neckline, the smug smile with which he was looking at you. “So, will you let me buy you a drink?” Just as you were about to answer, Jo came out the bathroom door again. “I´m ready! Let´s…,” she stopped mid-sentence when she saw who was standing next to you. Her surprised look quickly changed into a knowing grin. “Uhm..I want to look for Hansol. Is it ok if I just…” “Don´t worry you can leave her with me. I´ll look out for her.” Jihoon chimed in with an assuring smile. Even if you were not even expected to answer, you were completely speechless. An hour earlier you had racked your brain about how you would approach him, you remembered. “What a gentleman you are. Thank you.” she responded. “Text me if you need anything. I´ll look at my phone. And wait for us to walk you home!” she added, addressed to you. In the next second she had already disappeared into the crowd. “If you don´t mind I´ll get us something to drink?” “I´d love that.”

Minutes later you were sitting on a garden bench in the backyard. On the wall of the house there were paper lanterns attached, which made wonderful little colored spots of light dance around you. That Jackson Wang really knew how to throw a party, you thought again. You could still hear the music, but the walls functioned as a shield and made it appear as if the music was coming from far away. You and Jihoon weren´t the only ones who had gone outside to have a proper conversation, many couples had found the backyard to be the perfect place to make out, intertwined they sat there and you were sure that nothing would be able to keep them away from each other in that moment. But because you were drunk, and most importantly because Jihoon was sitting right next to you, you didn´t even give them more than a second of your attention.

Jihoon sat there, legs casually spread, with one arm on the backrest. You sat (very) close to each other, much closer than you probably would have, had you not been drunk. You had one leg on the bench so it was easier for you to face him. “You´re an art student, right?” “Yup. You´re a music student? Hansol said you are a very talented song writer.” Laughing out loud, he threw his head back. You were still nervous; your heart was still clearly beating a tad too fast and you had no clue what to do with your hands. But his laughter was contagious and his voice was soothing and so full of ease that all your nervousness was slowly guided out of your body. “Did he? I mean, he´s not wrong. I do indeed love writing songs, and I suppose I´m not too bad at it. Not sure I would call myself very talented though.” “Oh so humble.” You grinned. “Would you call yourself a very talented artist?” “No, I guess I wouldn´t. I´m not even sure I´m talented. Maybe I just love art. I think drawing the line between talent and just being hard-working is not always easy. That´s of course because talent and being hard-working are not mutually exclusive. You can be talented and hard working. That´s why I think it´s not always easy to detect talent.” Jihoon just looked at you, his face twisted into a slight smile. Why didn´t he say anything? “What?” you asked with a hint of shakiness in your voice. “It´s just…I think this was one of the smartest things I´ve ever heard a drunk person say.” Your eyes became big and suddenly your nervousness was back again. “I´m not that drunk!” “It was still smart.” You did not know what to say to that. You just looked at him and for a few seconds, neither you nor he said anything. But it wasn´t an awkward silence that begged to be broken, so the two of you just sat there, staring at each other.

“So tell me, what do you like to draw?” And you told him everything. About your obsession with peonies, about how you loved to draw old people because every single wrinkle, every scar seemed to tell so many stories. You told him about how you got off the bus three stops too early last summer just to paint a field of poppies, you told him how you once won an art contest in elementary school with a drawing of a hedgehog, that you didn´t even like. And you told him about how your mom had cried when you got accepted to art school because she was just so proud of you. While you were talking he listened attentively. And if you weren´t so immersed in your narration, if you were a little less drunk, you would´ve probably noticed the way he looked at you. Not once did he take his eyes off your face. When you were finished he told you about music. He told you how writing songs soothed him like nothing else. He told you how satisfying it was for him to finally finish a song. He told you how much he loved to sing and about that one night a few years ago the neighbors called the cops on him because he was singing too loudly in the middle of the night. You listened to every single word he said and if he wasn´t so immersed in his narration, if he was a little less drunk, he would´ve probably noticed the way you looked at him. Not once did you take your eyes off his face.

The buzzing of your phone ripped you out of your thoughts.

Jo: Hey, we´re about to go home. Are you ok? I don´t want you to walk home alone…

Fuck. You had totally forgotten the time. It was already 2 am. Jihoon saw you looking at your phone. “Is everything ok?” “Yeah, it´s just…I should probably go. My friend is leaving and she wants to walk me home.” “And what if I walked you home?" “You would do that?” “I just kept you from having fun with your friend the entire evening. I think I even owe you to walk you home.” He chuckled. You felt your cheeks flush. “I did have fun with you though.” “I´m very glad to hear that.” “And you´d really walk me home?” “Sweetie, it would be my pleasure.” he smirked. Sweetie. You definitely were not prepared for the pet name. All of a sudden your heart was beating so fast, you thought it would jump out of your chest. Your cheeks, rosy before, suddenly felt incredibly hot. “Thank you.” You answered, relieved after you noticed your voice didn´t leave you hanging.

You: I´m ok! Jihoon is going to walk me home. You don´t have to wait for me!

Jo: Use condoms!

You snorted and suppressed a laugh. Jihoon looked at you, his eyebrows slightly raised. “Sorry, my friend just texted something funny.” “What did she say?” Your heart seemed to have stopped beating for a moment. You didn´t think he´d ask that. “I, uh…nothing…she just…” you stammered. He laughed while never taking his eyes off you. “It´s ok. You don´t have to tell me.” “It´s just…” you tried to explain but instead you buried your face in your hands. This was so embarrassing! You didn´t know what reaction you expected from Jihoon, probably there wouldn´t have been anything to improve your situation anyway, but his low chuckle definitely made it worse. “I make you nervous, huh?” Your heart was still beating so fast and your cheeks had to be deep red by now and as much as you tried; you didn´t manage to look him in the eye again. So you just nodded. “Come on. Let´s walk for a bit.”

He stood up and stretched out his hand to pull you on your feet, which would not have been necessary, but you enjoyed the touching of your hands. It was the first time you touched each other on purpose. And even though it was only your hands that touched, you couldn´t help but feel more and more attracted to him. He didn´t let go of your hand, pressed it even more firmly and then gently pulled you past the left over party guests. Out of the front door, you just kept walking, your hand still in his. “Where do you live?” He sounded calm, relaxed and you knew you would be happy to hear nothing else than his voice for the rest of your days. “Basically on the other side of the campus. It´s a ten minutes ‘walk.” “Alright.”

And then the two of you walked, holding hands, side by side, so close other people would´ve thought you were a couple. Neither of you said anything for a few minutes. As before, the silence was not unpleasant at all, you simply enjoyed each other´s presence. Also, your heart finally had the opportunity to return to a normal pace, and the evening air cooled your cheeks. “I would love to see you again.” He underpinned his statement with a slight squeezing of your hand. You looked at him; he was focused on the walk, so you granted yourself a second to stare at him. He really was just so beautiful. The hair that gently fell in his face, his cheekbones, his neck. “I want to see you again too.” “You have to show me some of your drawings. Especially that one hedgehog drawing you were speaking of.” “Jihoon! I was 8 when I drew that and I didn´t even like it!” you made your voice sound playfully outraged. He couldn´t help but smile, his whole face lit up after hearing you say his name. He could definitely get used to that. “I bet it´s still good.” “No it´s not. But I can show you some other drawings.” “Guess I´ll have to settle for that.” He grinned. “Yes! And I want to hear some of your songs and you have to sing for me!” you said self-confidently. Your nervousness had completely disappeared from your body and had given way to a pleasant tension. “Deal.”

“This is me” you said as you came to a stop outside your building. He let go of your hand, the warmth leaving your palm empty, you wanted nothing more than to grab his hand again. A second later he had pulled his phone out of his pocket and held it out to you. “Here, type in your number.” You complied and gave it back to him. “Text me when you get home?” you asked shyly. “I promise.” And then came the moment, the moment in romance movies every viewer awaited eagerly, the moment you two should´ve kissed, or at least hugged. But you didn´t. Both of you were so absorbed in each other that neither one of you dared, nor even thought of making the first step. “Goodnight, Jihoon.” “Goodnight, Y/n.” And with that he left. You looked after him for a moment. Hell, even the way he walked was sexy.

Back in your apartment, you pushed your shoes off your feet just to fall into bed right after. You doubted that your remaining strength would be enough to change into your pajamas. Your body was so tired, but your mind was awake. Endorphins seemed to have decided to simply continue the party in your stomach. You were just lying there, arms outstretched, staring at the ceiling with a grin.

After, what had to be about 15 minutes, you heard your phone buzz. Never before had you reached for your phone so quickly.

Unknown: I just got home. Goodnight, Sweetie. Don´t forget to drink lots of water!

You read the message and you didn´t know it was possible, but your grin got even wider. Your phone pressed to your chest, your clothes still on, you started drifting off to sleep. You would just text him back, and save his contact in the morning, you thought. And with that, your body fell into a pleasant sleep.

Hi! It´s me, Jo. I´d like to thank you for reading my stuff! I really hope you enjoyed it. If you have any feedback, comments, requests, questions please let me know!

[kuroosdumbslut]

BNHA Bois and Girls AS: Stoners

* absolutely no one asked for this, only my high ass*

bakugou: ok hear me out, he only got into it because of kaminari and kirishima. when he realized it kinda helped he relax a bit, he started smoking on his own. one time midoriya walked in on him high as all hell and was lowkey scared cause “why is he being friendly, should i  get aizawa????” but he could smell the weed and made sure to write a note under bakugou’s analysis page and add in “stoner”. i could see bakubro smoking at least once a week, minimum. i can see him starting off as a lightweight but building up a pretty good tolerance for it.

kaminari: listen, if you hear random dance parties coming from his room, he is high as a kite. often mina or kirishima are with him, jamming with him also high as fuck lmao. probably gets high every weekend and on stressful days. wait but kaminari is the most fun person to be high with omg, yall go to the store before smoking to get all the favs, and hella water, then its party time: color changing lights, bumpin music and all the snacks you could want or need in these toasty times. kaminari definitely is much more flirty but also a lot less hyper. no matter how many times hes used or for however long, he still hacks his lungs out and his tolerance is that of a small child, but its kinda funny (mina always has his usual set up for when he gets waaaay too high with her)

mina: WHAT A QUEEN omg so she is a SUUUUPER chill stoner, but shes so fucking giggly oh my god if you say something even remotely funny she will be in fucking stitches for at least 10 minutes. she is most likely to be the one to remind her stoner friends to drink some water and care for newbies or lightweights who get high too fast ONE TIME omg one time ochako tried and got way too high (stronger bud) and gave her some candy and snacks, a whole bottle of water and cuddled up with her on the bed to make sure she wouldn’t accidentally fall or get hurt. shes got a good tolerance for it, and she knows her limits. gets high pretty often, 3 or 4 times a week

kirishima: this boy is totally the type to do a full workout and then flop on a couch to be as lazy as he can. like, he gets a workout in, comes back to his area, and just flops down on a couch, his bed, anything and eatches tv until he passes out. if hes with FRIENDS THO hes much more active and participating in dance offs with kaminari. hes kinda a lightweight, but hes careful to not get too high. really only gets high when hes in sad boi times or if he needs to unwind.

jirou: surprise, she blasts alt and emo music and regardless of whether or not that the others type of music, everyone gathers to her anyways to chill. will give people emo makeovers if they ask for one or looking ljme they want one. midoriya was her favorite to do because he straight up just looks like a baby e-boy instead lmao. fairly good tolerance, but is careful with other people (once she got too high and had a bad trip, mina let jirou stay with her that night). gets high strictly only at night, usually one or twice in a week depending on if shes overly stressed

midoriya: doesnt smoke all too often, but when he does, he needs supervision or at the very least someone nearby. 10000% will share wild thoughts with kaminari. he also seems like the type to go and stargaze for hours just to fall asleep in the grass lmao. poor baby is a lightweight and just a few puffs will get him suuuuper high. midoriya has and will continue to go to bakubro when hes too high. bakugou takes pity on him in those times (midoriya doesnt get high often, that might be why) and will let him chill with him until he’s coherent enough.

todoroki: ok but he definitely smokes by himself every night to ease his mind. like, all that shit he went through? yeah. sometimes if he really doesnt wanna be by himself, he’ll go to midoriya or bakugou and smoke with them. surprisingly, (or maybe unsurprisingly idk) hes super productive when hes high so he’ll do homework or clean his room or something.

*thats all i can think of rn but if you want more characters as stoners, lemme know*

[sleepy-timewriting]

Harmonic Heartbeats

Leon x Sayaka

word count: 919

Just some fluff for a ship I like

Leon felt his stomach tying in knots as he walked towards Sayaka's room. Her note had been clear- she had wanted him to visit her room for something, but for what? Especially at 9 'o clock at night. He swallowed. Maybe she was asking for help with homework? No, his grades were definitely lower than hers. Maybe she wanted to help him with his..? Why would she want to do that in the first place? He had no idea what she wanted, but he felt the pit in his stomach grow deeper as he knocked on her dorm door. He fixed his appearance a little (the most a kid in his pajamas could) before the door opened, and revealed a familiar face.

Sayaka already had a smile on her face as she peeked through the crack in the door. "Hello, Leon," she greeted, her sweet voice breaking through his worrisome thoughts, "I assume you read my note?" He nodded, feeling soothed by her voice. "I'm sorry for calling you to come out so late, but my schedule is pretty busy for the next few days, so I wanted to do this before then," Sayaka said, twisting her long, blue hair in her fingers. "Wait, I don't know what you're talking about," Leon admitted. Sayaka blinked, and flushed pink. "I guess I forgot to specify that in my note," she mumbled apologetically. He assured her it was okay, and again asked what she had needed.

"I wanted to give you those vocal lessons I had offered! Again, I'm really busy this week, so I wanted to at least have our first one before that," she explained. The fact that she was trying to do this for him (even though she definitely had better things to do) made Leon's heart skip a beat. He tried to seem nonchalant, "oh, yeah! Are you sure you wanna do it now? I don't want you to fall asleep while recording or whatever tomorrow, 'cause you wanted to do something nice for me." Sayaka giggled, "don't worry so much. One night out of my schedule won't hurt me."

She sat down on her plush bed, while Leon sat down on the ground, cross legged. He didn't want to push his boundaries. The only reason she even knew he existed was because she overheard him talking to Makoto about wanting to get into the music scene. Other than that, be really didn't know much about her, besides stuff that everyone knew, her being a pop star and all. But, he still felt drawn to her, even before she had offered to help him out. He snapped out of his thoughts when she said, "now, before we start actually singing, let's practice our scales first."

°○•°☆

Leon had never been so embarrassed in his life. Thank god for the dormitory's sound proof walls, because he thought he sounded terrible. When he had tried singing Sayaka's sample songs, his voice cracked so much and he just wanted to stop. But Sayaka, she was so patient. Judgement never even seemed to cross her mind, as she kept a calm smile on her face. "You're doing fantastic! I think you're doing better than when I first started," she said. "How old were you when you first started, 6?" Leon asked, as Sayaka chuckled nervously. "Still, your first time trying to sing seriously is not gonna be perfect, just like anything you do," she reassured, "were you perfect at baseball when you first started?" Leon thought back to the little black haired kid who became a baseball legend. "Ehhh, kinda," he said, hoping he didn't sound big headed. It's not like he even really liked baseball that much, so it wasn't something he was super proud of in the first place.

Sayaka blinked in surprise, and giggled, "ok, not the best example, but most of the time you won't be excellent at something you first try." She started the music again, as Leon internally groaned. "Don't worry, I'll sing with you, if it makes you feel better," she winked at him while saying so. He nodded, and started to sing to her music. She joined him in sync. She sounded angelic, even though he had heard her songs thousands of times on the radio, there was something different hearing her in person. Her melodic voice carried so well, even over his own singing. She seemed so happy while doing it as well. Her smile lit up the room, and he felt his heart race.

He noticed she stopped, when she asked "Are you alright?" "Huh? What do you mean?" He asked, only remembering her singing. "You stopped singing, I was wondering if you were okay," she said, nervously. "Oh! Uh, yeah I'm good! I'm just kinda tired, its like," he checked his phone, 10:53, "oh, it's really late, we should head to bed." "Oh yes, I guess we should," she said (almost sadly?? Probably not). "I had a lot of fun, I almost never sing just to do it!" He got up, and helped her stand as well. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow, huh?" He said, more like a question. "Of course, we both live here after all," Sayaka said matter-of-factly. Leon blushed and agreed. She waved as he walked out of her room, and back to his. He leaned against the door, and felt his hand over his heart. "Dammit," he cursed, "I just met her, there's no way I'm this soft, am I?"

Yes, there was a way.

°○•°☆

Heehhoo I've been thinking about writing this for days lmao I just want them to be happy

Seriously tho, am I the only one who thinks that it would be adorable if Leon started getting into music and Sayaka helped him? Idk I love the idea

[weirdo-with-a-nametag]

This is a vent, basically. No obligation to read, at all.

So, this was today:

I had to help my mom move furniture for hours, got woken up early to do that, ripped my new pants on a nail helping her, pulled a muscle in my arm, messed up my hips, and then spent hours with my housemate and her boyfriend trying to donate blood, but we weren't able to, and then had to buy gas because neither of them had money to pay for the gas for this thing they wanted to do.

Came home, sat down to do the homework I've been putting off to do chores, and was called into the kitchen because my grandma wanted help with the green beans for dinner. went back to my room to break them, did that, interrupted several times for taking too long. Nana decided to cook the meatballs I got specifically so that I could try them, so I was like ok that's fine just let me cook them.

Cooked meatballs. Constant contact with my grandma, at my limit, exhausted. Everyone walked away so I guess the green beans are on me also?

Housemate texts me:

> Do I smell sausage?

< No it's meatballs.

> I want sausage

< Ok

> Can you make me sausage?

< I'm cooking the meatballs, and the green beans, and I'm already past my limits today. can you come make it yourself?

> I don't know how

< Pan, oil, sausage. I can help, just can't make it myself. Or, you can try the meatballs

> Ok I'll try them.

She comes down, decides meatballs are good enough. Adds to the noise of the kitchen, brings Nana back in to ask about cutting boards. Then she's standing here, cutting apples, and I'm humming along to my music to deal with the noise and exhaustion. Nana is talking at me.

Housemate asks me to stop humming, for the umpteenth time today, because she has a migraine. I stop, and tears collect in my eyes involuntarily because everything is way too much. I freeze in my chair, watching my green beans burn, until she leaves and I can hum again.

Cooking green beans. Nana comes back, asks me how I'm gonna cook the noodles. I didn't know I was cooking the noodles. Now I'm cooking all of dinner? Call my mom to figure out what she was doing with the noodles, she doesn't have a plan, so I've got to come up with a sauce for them to go with the green bean sauce and the meatballs. Great.

Nana keeps coming back like what're you doing with the noodles? What're you doing with the green beans? I'm going to bed. No, I'm back, can we eat yet?

Tell her I'm not sure what I'm doing with the noodles yet, and my mom appears and takes some of the (unseasoned) noodles and (unfinished) green beans, which prompts Nana to try and get some, too. I tell her it's not done yet, and mom gets involved for some reason (trying to back me up, I think. But she just makes conflict with Nana) and Nana gets agitated.

Nana says she's not even hungry, she's gonna go to bed. I'm like. Fine go to bed. It's not like I've been cooking for an hour because you decided it was on me to cook your food?

She comes back, says she's "just frustrated we can't eat yet" and I do not respond. How do I respond to that. Encourage her to eat something. She takes the food I haven't finished cooking and goes off to bed.

I am now cooking a dinner that no one wants, with my broken down body and even less energy for the studying I have to do before class tomorrow.

But hey. At least no one else is in here, now.

I'm...really having a hard time. I'm trying to help people out, because I feel like I've been cold lately. Helped my mom for hours on a construction job, and then yesterday on remodeling the living room, and today bringing the new furniture in. I'm really, really tired. Keep getting yelled at for my room being messy, but it's all I can do to drink a little water every day. If they wouldn't get mad at me for it, it'd actually be cleaner because I wouldn't be dealing with their anger on top of all the tasks.

My mom cries about me sitting down to cook or do dishes, about me using a cane, about me being tired all the time on the rare occasions she believes me. Says she's trying to help, but she's just pushing supplements and exercise and diet regimens on me.

I have to manage her emotions and expectations and help out as much as I can because everyone is stressed. None of their anger helps me. I hope it helps them.

It doesn't seem to, because they keep going over the same things. Or maybe it's easier to deal with if they yell as an outlet.

I got out of my dad's house. Here, it's lower stakes as far as anger, but I'm responsible for everyone's emotional wellbeing.

It's always been like that. I'm trying so hard to get my mom to just...vent to other people, solve her problems on her own. I shouldn't be the one she comes to for advice on dealing with her frustration with me. It's not okay that she cries at me whenever I feel her I have a problem with something she did. Or when I'm not free to do what she wants me to do.

She doesn't know any better. I've been trying forever to get her resources on...managing her emotions, talking to people, managing relationships.

She goes through friends like sparklers, fun and excitement and then she's overstayed her welcome and they don't have anything left they're willing to give her. So she takes it from me. And I can't leave, so that's worked for eighteen years.

I don't blow up, and she doesn't respect boundaries or calm words, so I tell her every time that I can't help her with these problems and she gets sad or mad and then comes back the next day with the same thing.

I have no privacy because my room has been under construction since before quarantine started. I'm sleeping in the living room. All the noises come into my space, and all the heat. Nana's mad because she wants to relax in there, and it's messy. Everyone comes in with no announcement and starts talking to me.

I failed 4 out of 5 classes last term because I can't think or get anything done in there.

This term I am taking one class and its lab, so there's less work, but I don't qualify for my scholarship this term and I'm falling behind on my degree.

But I'm at my limit, and I'm trying to respect that. The pressure is building in my head, and I'm worried I'll break down again, and worse. But I have nowhere to go.

What can I change, that I haven't tried and failed at already? If I could be left alone, this would be much easier.

But I live with my family, and they want and need things from me. It's almost midnight, and I think I might just go to bed. I have an in person doctors appointment tomorrow morning and I don't have a ride, yet, because everyone else's things are more urgent. Had to reschedule that appointment from today because my mom woke me up to do her thing and I forgot all about it and missed the whole thing.

Everything is... High strung, stress, energy. I'm already tired, and then any interaction is like running uphill, and if I try to ask for space it just drags things out.

My housemate gets it, a bit, but she's wrapped up in herself as much as any of them and often doesn't realize the effects of her actions. I'm alone, but I'm never alone. I don't know what to do.

[catubarca]

Harry Potter Next Generation Headcanons

im bored. im full of emotions, and am rly missing the HP world... i just want to write down my headcannons for the next gen kiddos tbh.

please remember these are just my opinions? its okay if yours are different. im just bored and want to share my thoughts,,

Teddy Lupin

his name is Theodore Remus “Teddy” Lupin. it’s just what it is

I don’t care what JKR says, to me his name will always be Theodore

i can’t do this “Edward” stuff im so sorry,,,

h u f f l e p u f f

proper school uniform? never heard of it

messy hair, messy clothes

punk rock child

we’re talking like,,,at least two (2) lip piercings ok

absolutely terrible in herbology. do not leave this child alone in a greenhouse, bad things happen

fuckin hoards chocolate

its a problem

dating Victorie Weasley

random bursts of dancing

keeps a lock of hair pink for his mother

lives with the Potters, enjoys pretending to be Ginny to ground his siblings

“Lily, why aren’t you coming out of your room? Dinner’s ready?” “You said I’m grounded! You tell me!” “What? Oh, for the- THEODORE REMUS LUPIN-“

s m i r k s

effortlessly cool,,, but so so dorky,,, in a cool way

Victorie Weasley

ravenclaw!

looks a lot like her mother, Fleur, but inherited those Weasley freckles

a little confused a lot of the time

absolute sweet tooth (teddy abuses this fact a lot)

Mom Friend™

will help you with your homework

always got a book on her

super beautiful and like,,,, the absolute nicest person,,, but

cannot dance

like at all

adores Charms class

a softie you don’t want to cross

“I’m the oldest”

Dominique Weasley

inherited the Classic Weasley Red Hair™

idolises her Uncle Charlie

“I wanna save animals and work with cool dragons, just like Uncle Charlie does!”

Bill almost has a heart attack

always bringing stray animals home

(“is that a lizard in your pocket, Dominique?” “Yes! His name is Blob.” “You know how your father’s afraid of reptiles, sweetheart, you can’t bring it inside.”)

Gryffindor child

favourite class is definitely Care of Magical Creatures, she and Hagrid like to talk about proper care methods for rare creatures

perpetual dirt stains

BIG middle child vibes

doesn’t really label her sexuality… just kinda does what she wants rly

all the pets in Hogwarts love her

rumours are she’s got an innate, natural magical ability to make them all love her

(she feeds them under the table)

it’s a mystery

big advocate for animal rights

f e m i n i s t

willing to throw hands at all times

usually all smiles though

one of those people who use their whole bodies to laugh

kind of an accidental heartthrob

romcoms

Louis Weasley

looks the most like his mother

ravenclaw

absolutely filled with curiosity. always reading or talking or learning

random facts

(how do you even find that sort of information?

you don’t want to know)

coffee boy

sort of musically talented?

he and James Sirius preach the importance of skincare to all who will listen

secretly full of sass and dry wit

vry graceful and fluid

e y e r o l l

awkward smiles? can never smile properly in photos

on the ravenclaw quidditch team

Ravenclaw Prefect

(“You might be older, but I’m taller.” “Fuck off!”)

only watches High Quality™ tv shows/media

kind of a disaster, despite the gracefulness

Molly Weasley

Classic red hair

comes across as a bit uptight, like her father

I don’t care what you think. (She really cares what you think.)

E y e b r o w s

death glares

drinks like 5 cups of coffee in the morning

studies,,, like a lot

definitely a Gryffindor though

mom jeans

always ready to debate a topic. will destroy opponents.

has been trying to start a successful Debate Club for like 4 years now

naturally falls into the position of a group leader

would be a teacher’s pet, if she wasn’t ready At All Times™ to debate the relevancy of the course syllabus or outdated teaching methods

got into a fight with Severus Snape’s portrait in Headmistress McGonagall’s office.

(Dumbledore’s portrait was laughing, until she turned and ragged on him for a bit. Minerva thought it was absolutely hilarious, so she just let Molly go at it for a while).

full of rage towards everything, but wears a very careful mask of aloofness

to calm down, she likes painting her nails

she’s very good at it

she’s also very good at painting and art in general, weirdly enough

Lucy Weasley

G R Y F F I N D O R

adores shitty puns and has a terrible sense of humour

brown hair, not red

loves to prank people, which makes her Uncle George very proud

Percy complains about her behaviour, but makes sure he knows he’s proud too

(charming all the cauldrons in the potions classroom to scream whenever they’re stirred takes a more complex understanding of spell work than one would expect).

a pit of a punk streak

rly loves hip hop

high key drama queen

does she ever stop yelling? we’re yet to find out

average grades in terms of theory, but she’s the best in terms of applying information

especially for her pranks

has allies throughout the castle, from the portraits to the students

the bigger the prank, the better

but is a firm believer in “confuse, don’t abuse”

all her pranks are mostly harmless

is a surprising lover of older literature, like Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, an influence of her sister

a bit rebellious

Fred Weasley II

name isn’t officially “the second”, but it sounds cooler

James Potter, Lucy Weasley, Molly Weasley and Fred Weasley are like the Marauders 2.0

says “squad” and “lit” unironically

niche humour

hipster vibes

avid music lover

smiley sunshine child

takes after his mother the most in looks, just like his sister

a chill type of gryffindor

plays quidditch, and is an excellent chaser, just like his mother

the absolute undisputed King™ of puppy-dog eyes

just,,,, beautiful

the True teacher’s pet

hands in his work on time,, asks lots of questions,,, likes helping students understand their work,, what a boy

can hella nyoom

runs so fast

look at him go

as you might expect, loves a good prank. always down for a laugh

Roxanne Weasley

Gryffindor and pROUD

absolute Queen tbh

was definitely Head Prefect or Gryffindor Prefect at some point

loved by the school

absolute legend

G I R L   P O W E R

infectious laughter

has a soft spot for Louis Weasley and Scorpius Malfoy

these poor disaster children,,,, they need a Mother

M O M

big mom vibes

mothers the hell out of all the first years

a feminist through and through

can be found nodding aggressively to Molly Weasley’s semi-deranged, furious ranting

YAAAASS

loves slang. uses so much slang. always up to date with trends and memes

has all the gossip

becomes a mess around pretty girls

absolute blushing, stuttering disaster around cute girls oh my god

her eye make-up game is killer

sparkly

Distinguished Lesbian

Rosie Weasley

did someone say Weasley™?

red hair and freckles and curls oh my

on the autism spectrum, has trouble socialising sometimes

hella passionate about stuff

hangs out with Scorpius and Albus, the Golden Trio 2.0

f em ini st

her jokes are the best. high quality sense of humour.

Ravenclaw

likes to read. it’s quiet in the school library, which is nice.

abysmal at herbology

surprisingly good at Care of Magical Creatures though? Animals are just,,, so much easier to deal with

overall, really good grades though

bit of a silent type, but she’s actually a riot to hang out with

actually pretty good at quidditch? She’s not on the team, and she’s not super interested in playing, but?? She’s not bad??

She can land a solid hit with a beater’s bat

(eyes you judgementally over the top of a book)

dry wit humour

will throw hands over chess

Hugo Weasley

hufflepuff

unbeatable at chess, like his dad

a lost puppy

someone please help this child

softie

kind of low-key emotional

so supportive!! and loyal!! high-key best friend material

foodie. loves food. please feed him.

takes a bit more after his dad appearance wise

loves to cook. spends lots of time with grandma Molly and his dad in the kitchen

Professor Longbottom is his favourite professor, because he’s more chilled and laidback.

other professors and classes fill him with Distress™

loves astronomy too

maths whizz, so good at arithmancy

(“uh, actually-“)

a little bossy, like his mother

is trying so hard

maybe a little too hard

a bit insecure and nervous, but so soft

please treat this child carefully and with love

James Sirius Potter

Gryffindor

L O U D

a fucking disaster child

what’d you expect, putting “James” and “Sirius” together?

DRAMATIC GASPING

flails his hands around when he talks

s t r u t s

bisexual mess, had a crush on both the Longbottom children at some point

is better than you at everything

including being a different gender

fuck you that’s why

so pretty

he’s so pretty

is thIS CHILD EVER NOT LAUGHING AT SOMETHING OH My god

laughs at everything

all the time

always

high-key emotional

badly timed finger guns

looks like a model in photos? wtf?

gets invited to Girls Nights™

wears nail polish and makeup

loves to yell at people about gender roles and defying stereotypes

TEA SIS

not on the quidditch team surprisingly enough, even though he’s pretty good

prefers to be in the stands, doing A+ commentary on the games

if he can get Fred to stop mid-air due to unbearable, suffocating laughter at least once a game it’s a win in his books

has it OUT for the hufflepuff quidditch team and no one knows why??

definitely makes puns on his name

it drives everyone insane

harry always replies he’s just making his namesake proud

that also drives everyone insane

smug lil shit

Albus Severus Potter

“It’s just Al.”

S L Y T H E R I N

will always find a way to get what he wants, eventually

“dad, why did you name me this way?”

unimpressed

sigh

hella smart. is topping at least five classes

Aunt Hermione is his favourite. She’s the fucking Mistress of Magic! All that power, the ability to make change and improve the Magical World as a whole-

sass master

the reason headmistress mcgonagall keeps a bottle of scotch under her desk at all times

the only potter child to inherit The Eyes™

absolute insomniac

kind of emo, but turns into a fucking softie around Scorpius Malfoy it’s hilarious

adverse to violence. prefers a verbal beatdown method

really tall? despite having shorties for parents??? no one saw it coming

(especially not Teddy. He’s always scared of losing his last few inches of height)

Functional Gay

he’s on the slytherin quidditch team, as a seeker

Lily Luna Potter

Gryffindor

FEMINIST

do not mess with lily luna potter

she may seem cute and sweet, but she will destroy you

inherited her father’s black hair

disaster lesbian

transfiguration is her favourite subject, by far

has no idea what she wants to do with the rest of her life.

Existential Crisis Father-Daughter Bonding Time™

do you ever sleep?

takes after Ginny the most in personality

also, kind of the most like James Fleamont Potter in personality, too?

Loves to help her brother out with pranks, laughs at him when he gets caught and she gets away with it

The only one of the Potter Children who hasn’t got into a fight with Severus Snape’s portrait

because she just ignores him instead

loves talking to the portraits around the castle

Super good at Quidditch, is on the team as a Chaser

Quidditch Captain at some point

adores Hagrid, but who out of the Potter children doesn’t?

Idolises Minerva McGonagall

just as oblivious as her father

Scorpius Malfoy

Actually in Ravenclaw, not Slytherin, much to many people’s surprise

abSOLUTE DADDY’S BOY

super close with his dad

Draco is just so supportive of like everything he does (unlike his father)

classic blonde malfoy looks

actually really funny?

a cuddler. loves hugs. always leeching warmth off of someone

he and Rosie sometimes finger-tip-touch which is their version of a hug, because he know’s she’s not super comfortable with touch

was basically adopted by the Weasley’s and Potter’s

James Sirius will murder for this child

booknerd, always rambling to Al and Rosie about new books coming out he’s interested in reading.

has had a crush on Albus Potter since like 1st year

always worried about making his dad proud, and keeping up the Malfoy name

sweet tooth

he’s just,, soft. just a warm, happy child. he wants love, and affection. someone tell him he’s doing okay, please.

needs,,, validation,,,

he’ll tell you out loud that he has no favourite aunts or uncles, but he secretly really likes spending time with his Uncle Ron

they had a talk, once, in like the middle of the night at a sleepover with Rosie and Al, about feeling insecure in comparison to others, and learning to be proud of yourself for your achievements

there were a few tears, but it was nice

Ron was actually the third person he told, besides his dad and Rosie, about having a crush on Al

openly a disaster romantic. trash taste in romance novels.

always welcome in the Potter-Weasley households

[mysticthot]

RFA Soulmate AU

spoilers for v and ray’s routes

Yoosung- Whatever you draw on your skin, your soulmate can see

He learned about soulmates when he was a little kid

Loved the idea that there was a person made perfectly for him

Didn’t try to really contact you until he got into his teen years

He was nervous to try and draw something, he didn’t know what to say, but he didn’t want you to think he was lame if he just said hi or something

You and him had shared drawings before, but just little things like a homework page or a doodle of a flower

He didn’t know why you had never tried to talk to him before, but he couldn’t really say anything cause he hadn’t tried either

Maybe you were shy like him

His first word from you comes when he’s least expecting it

He’s in high school, hella focused on a test, then he feels a weird sensation on his arm

He looks down, and he’s unfamiliar, yet somehow comforting handwriting 

“Hello...? I’m MC <3

Boi is shook

Then he is immediately called out by the teacher who thinks he’s cheating and writing answers on his arm

That whole ordeal takes over his focus, so he isn’t able to respond to you until after class

“Hi, I’m Yoosung!”

After that, you guys are constantly talking

You tell each other about your day, and the places you live, or even draw little things to make the other laugh or blush

He’s so excited to graduate and go to college, but you’re a year behind him, so you wont be able to join him at University right away

He promises that he’s fine waiting one more year, he doesn’t want you to have to move on your final year of high school

Then Rika dies

And he’s a mess

You see him change through his writing

He writes less, and it’s almost always about Rika when he does

You want to go visit him, but he insists he’s ok

You were the only one who seemed to understand him, he didn’t know if he would have been able to make it without you

When he gets into gaming and starts slacking off a lot, he’s worried you’ll think he’s a loser and you wont want to be with him anymore

“Yoosung, you’re literally my soulmate I don’t care what you do as long as you’re happy!”

Definitely cries

When you graduate, he is so excited

All the RFA members know all about you cause you’re all he talks about the months leading up to your move

He waits at the airport for your plane practically vibrating with nerves and excitement

“OMG Zen what if she thinks I’m too short, or not manly enough, or she doesn’t like my hair, or-”

“Yoosung, I’m in the middle of a rehearsal, stop calling me!”

You spend the whole plane ride drawing intricate designs all over your arm so you will be able to find him in a crowd easier

Your plane lands, and you walk out, trying to find someone that meets his description

You see him before he sees you

He’s standing there, holding flowers, looking so nervous

You have the biggest smile on your face as you run over to him and his eyes finally meet yours and-

Oh no, he’s crying

He break down in tears running into your arms, sweeping you off your feet

“Oh MC I’m so happy to see you I’ve waited my whole life for this moment you are everything I ever hoped you would be!” 

“I love you Yoosung.”

“I love you too.”

You give him his first kiss and its perfect

He’s never been so happy

Until he logs onto the group chat and finds Saeyoung had hacked the CCTV and showed everyone how he immediately cried when he saw you

Not so happy anymore

Zen- Have each others first word tattooed (has to be spoken directly to them)

Zen had always found his soulmate tattoo rather funny

On his wrist, his soulmates first word were delicately written in a beautiful cursive

People always admired it, until they looked closer and saw what it actually said

“Oh fuck- Shit oh no I fucked it up!”

As a child, parents and teachers did not appreciate when he showed the vulgar words around to the other kids

It was like a badge of honor when he was younger

Kids thought he was cool purely based on the curse words on his wrist

As he got older, it lost its novelty and became just like any normal tattoo for him

Though, it was still funny to see people’s faces when they first saw it

He was sure he would meet his soulmate when he was in the biker gang

The girls he hung around with then were tough and cursed frequently, but it never happened

He had gone out with a few girls, but it never felt right, and he knew it was cause they weren’t the one for him

When he got his act together and started doing musicals, he thought maybe you would be a coworker, cursing after messing up a line, but he had still yet to find you

The hopeless romantic binch he is, he is constantly complains about his lack of soulmate to the RFA

But none of them found theirs either, so they can all kinda relate

He is always thinking of you, so of course you would show up in his life the only time he wasn't

It was during the opening night of a production he was in

He was the lead, of course, and this was one of the rare moments you weren’t the main thing on his mind

You were sat in the crowd, near the stage with a few friends

You had a friend in the play, and she had gotten you good tickets, so you brought flowers and stuff to show your support

The lights dimmed, and the most gorgeous man you had ever seen in your life walked out onto the stage

You swear he must have been a statue or something

The play began, and he delivered his lines perfectly

You were supposed to be there supporting your friend, but you’re pretty sure your eyes hadn’t left him all night

It was near the end of the production, when he turned to the crowd with a flourish, his eyes suddenly meeting yours as he spoke his next line:

“Could this be love?”

His eyes stayed glued to yours for a second to long, before he unfroze, and continued his monologue

You were shook, looking down at your tattoo with wide eyes

His words were on your wrist, and as you read over them, it was like his voice spoke to you all over again

You couldn’t wait for the play to be over

You sat through the rest of it trying to figure out the perfect first line to say to him

His was so romantic and beautiful, you didn't want to screw this up!

As soon as the curtain fell, you hopped up, shouting to your friends that you were going to the bathroom, before running off towards back stage

You really didn’t know where you were going, but you followed down some halls following the faint sound of the cast members voices when you turned a corner and ran full speed into someone

Stumbling backwards, you looked up and saw the guy from the play, your soulmate

Your mind went blank, you scrambled for something to say before

“Oh fuck- Shit oh no I fucked it up!”

You gasped, realizing what had just come out of your mouth, before looking down at his arm and seeing those exact words tattooed on him

“Oh...my...god.”

Wide eyed and mouth open, you stared at him

He looked right back with a smile that made you wanna pass out

“I am so sorry. You had that tattooed all your life?”

“Don’t worry about it, I wouldn’t want anything else.”

He took your hands in his, and you could see nothing but love and happiness in his eyes

“I’m so fucking happy to finally meet you.”

Jaehee- You have a mark where your soulmate will touch you the first time

Most people had their marks on their hands

The hand print of their soulmate forever on their palm, signifying they would one day shake their hand, those were the most common

Some people had their marks in more random places, maybe they would run into them in a crowd, or be passing by one day in the street

Jaehee, how ever, had two hand prints forever marked on her back

There were two possibilities, either she would be pushed by her soulmate or hugged

While she hopped it was the latter, either of the meetings seemed rather forward, especially for a conservative girl like her

Who would be hugging (or, hopefully not, pushing) her at their for their very first meeting?

While thoughts of her soulmate one day showing up in her life occupied her mind for most of her younger years, she didn’t really have much time to think about romance these days

Her work and home life was plagued by corporate heirs, cats, and the RFA, leaving very little room for much else

There were nights when she would be changing, or just getting out of the shower, and she would catch sight of the marks in the mirror

It would fill her with a sadness and a loneliness that not even Zens videos could cure

She was only an assistant, she felt she had no one in her life that truly understood her

That is, until you came along

She was suspicious when you had first entered the chatroom, but over time she learned more about you

You understood her like no one else ever had before

You cared for her well being and stood up for her when she was being over worked

For the first time, she felt she was actually cared for 

She could not wait to meet you at the party 

The day of the party, she woke up to a tingle in her back that didn’t go away 

As party grew nearer, the tingles only got worse, and Jaehee began to get more and more nervous

Time seemed to slow down as a you walked through the crowd towards her

She had never seen your face, yet she knew you must have been the MC from the chat room

A smiled took over your features as you opened your arms and swept her up in to a tight hug 

She could feel as your fingers fell right into place of her marks, and her hands came to rest over yours

Her eyes were wide, and misty behind her glasses, before she let out a breath, and completely wrapped herself into you

For the first time in her life, she felt complete

“Thank you.” she cried into your shoulder.

Jumin- Red strings connecting soulmates(obvi lol)

Jumin grew up in a loveless house

His fathers soulmate had died before he ever met them, so Jumin grew up watching him try and fill that void with other women

That didn’t exactly give him a lot of hope for his future

With no one to compare it to, or even ask, Jumin was pretty clueless about the red string on his finger

All he knew was somewhere his soulmate was on the other end

As he got older any small amount of interest he may have had in his soulmate disappeared

The people in his life didn’t really care for soulmates, that was more of a commoner thing

People married for convenience or to help their image, rarely for love

There were women throwing themselves at him daily, but he was known for being untouchable (does jumin han is gay?)

People thought he was waiting for his soulmate, but he truly just didn't care

He met you for the first time at a Gala event in (your country)

It had taken him a while to notice, as he went out of his way to ignore the string, but he looked up and saw the end of his string for the first time in his life

It was connected to you, a waitress that was catering the event, standing across the room

His heart seemed to jump for a moment, and he turned around, not really knowing what to do

It hadn’t seemed like you’d noticed him yet, you were working hard to balance a tray of champagne as you wove through the crowd

He watched you walk around for a few minutes, you politely smiled at guests and passed drinks

He was internally arguing with whether or not to go talk to you, when you were stopped by a hand on your shoulder 

His mood immediately dropped as he saw the hand belonged to none other than his father, who was clearly flirting with you

He never could resist a pretty face, no matter who it was

Jumin turned and left, calling Driver Kim to take him back to his hotel

With every step away from the building, he felt a tug in his chest like something was wrong, but he pressed on

Soulmates were nothing but a useless fantasy, something people use to comfort themselves into believing they weren’t alone in this world

The last thing he needed in his life was another disappointing woman

He didn’t think much about his soulmate for two years

Then you showed up in the chatroom, and you treated him like no one else had

You laughed at his jokes and asked about Elizabeth the 3rd

You didn’t ask or expect anything from him, you said you liked to talk to him, and he realized he liked to talk to you too

When the hacker was becoming a threat, he refused to let you stay alone and unguarded, and insisted for your safety and his sanity, that you come to the penthouse

He hadn’t thought of his soulmate in years, but now he wanted to hope it was you, that he was getting a second chance to meet you

His string often lead out the front door of his penthouse, but now, as he sat their waiting for you, he hoped for the first time that when those doors opened, he would see the other end and get back the chance he missed

As you stepped out of the car you couldn’t hold back your smile, your string was headed right into that building

You knocked on the door, and his voice immediately called for you to come in

Your string was going right into his penthouse

Heart pounding, your opened the door, and on the other side stood Jumin

His heart soared when he saw you, and it nearly stopped when he saw the end of his string connecting him to you

He had never smiled so hard, tears were collecting in his eyes

He couldn’t believe it was really you

The red string faded away as your hand came to grip his, and he felt all of his strings become untangled

He cant believe he wasted years being without this feeling, without you, all because of his own fears

“MC, I love you. I promise I will for the rest of my days, I will cherish you always.”

“I love you too Jumin.”

He had missed out on you once, he wasn’t gonna let you get away again

(extra-)

“wow jumin u know i used to work for a catering company that did all kinds of fancy gigs, i cant believe i never met u there!”

“uh... about that....”

Seven- Soulmates can feel each others feelings

It was like a constant hum in the back of your mind...well, if that hum came with a particular feeling

Your soulmates feelings weren’t exactly the same as your own, but they were felt as though they were

As a child, you didn’t quite understand why you were sad all the time...cause you weren't sad, you just felt sad

Your parents knew your soulmate must not have the best life, but they couldn’t exactly explain that to a 7 year old

As you grew up and learned more about soulmates, you began to understand

When they felt sad, you did

When they felt scared, you did

When they felt hopeless, you did too

So you made it your goal to be as happy as you could, as some way to possibly comfort your soulmate

You always tried to see the bright side of things and be positive

You didn’t want to add any extra sadness to whatever your soulmate was already feeling

And your soulmate was grateful for that...or at least you felt like he was

As time passed, you soulmates feelings changed

He was still sad, but it was a different kind

Like he was sad, but he was ok with being sad

It was both more and less intense for you to feel

When you joined the RFA, you immediately felt a pull to the mysterious 707

His personality seemed to familiar to you, it was like you had already known him

Meanwhile, Saeyoung was feeling the same thing

You had a bright feeling to you that made him feel like he was in a warm comfortable place

This feeling was something he often retreated into during his childhood

He would feel that happiness in the back of his mind and relish it like it was his own, and it made him feel good

He had a feeling you might be his soulmate, and that’s why he was so hesitant to go to the apartment

On one hand, as soon as you were beginning to be in danger, every part of him screamed for him to go to you

On the other, he knew if he went and you were his soulmate, he wouldn’t be able to keep himself from you

He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if something happened to you because of him

Despite this, he ended up going over, and as soon as his eyes met yours, he knew

And you knew too

It was like meeting someone you knew a long time ago, they were familiar, yet you weren’t sure who they were exactly

You hugged him immediately, and he was so stiff in your arms

He wanted nothing but to melt into that warmth, for the first time in his life, that happiness that kept him going was right in front of him

But he held back, and he was so cold to you

He set up his things in the corner and tried to block out how confused and hurt you felt

You didn’t know why he was acting like this, but you felt his sadness, his loneliness

So you did what you had always done, and you loved him for who he was, and you enveloped him in a warmth so deep he couldn’t hold himself back

“I don’t understand MC, why don’t you get that I’m not good for you?! I’ve done nothing but bring you sadness your whole life, I’m putting you in danger just by being here! Why can’t you let me be?”

“I love you Seven. I’ll love you when you’re sad, and when you’re happy, and everything in between. I’m always going to be here for you whether you want me or not!”

He cried into your shoulder, holding you close

He’d never felt that kind of security before

You were doing you’re best for him, so he resolved to do his best for you

V- You see color for the first time when you make eye contact with your soulmate

Being a photographer who couldn’t see colors was not an easy job

V would take pictures, then put a grey filter over what was already grey for him so it looked the same to everyone, soulmate or not

He wanted to badly to fall in love, to feel complete and be loved in return

He had almost found that in Rika

The feelings were there, they were both sure they were in love, but both of them continued to see in black and white

It wasn’t an uncommon thing for people who weren’t soulmates to date

People often did until they were ready to settle down, and some unlucky few never found their soulmates, so they made what love they could

V tried to be happy with this kind of love, he tried to love her in a way that would make them both feel like they could see the colors

But Rika was unhappy, and didn’t believe he really loved her, after all, if he did he would be able to tell her what color her eyes were

When she faked her death and ran off, he felt he deserved what she did to his eyes, he couldn’t love her enough to see colors, so he didn’t deserve to see at all

He was content keeping these secrets and protecting Rika

Then you showed up, claiming to be sent by her

It didn’t take long for him to find you, being tricked by Rika and Ray to believe everything was just a game

He saw you in the gardens one night with Ray, and for a split second, he thought he saw the color of your hair, but he blinked and it was gone

He knew he needed to rescue you before you got hurt, the last thing he wanted was and innocent person getting dragged into this because of him

When he tried to rescue you the first time, he was thrown off when you turned around and your eyes were a magnificent (e/c) 

Then suddenly everything had color, and you were staring at him and he was staring at you and Ray was yelling that there was an intruder and guards were coming

He had to leave before he was captured, but as he escaped, all he could think about was the color of your eyes

This was not part of the plan, but it made everything a thousand times more complicated

Neither of you mentioned it in the chatrooms, but he promised he would be back to save you, and you knew you could trust him

When Rika brought you out to the gardens, she explained how V had tried to force a love that wasn’t there

You wanted to shout at her, he was never meant to be hers!

But you held yourself back, she was using you as bait and suddenly V was captured and being dragged away

When Seven saved him, all you could do was stare at him as he lay in you lap

He was mumbling your name and asking if you were safe, drugged out of his mind, but still worrying for you

When he began to regain his senses as the drug wore off, he felt terrible

He had endangered you, he had not only hurt Rika, but he had almost hurt you because of it

He realized what he had done was wrong, he didn’t know how to love

But when he was with you, everything that had been difficult with Rika, was so easy

Loving you was like second nature to him, he knew you were truly meant for him

You taught him how to love, and his world was metaphorically and literally brighter

He could paint and take pictures and see all the beauty in the world, because you loved him effortlessly

Saeran- Soulmates can meet each other in their dreams

Saeran did not know what soulmates were for a very long time

His mother didn’t teach tell them about any of those things, and he never got to leave the house, so he didn’t know until one day when Saeyoung  explained it to him

It was the middle of the night, they were together under a blanket looking at a book Saeyoung had brought home

“I learned something new today. There was a book in the church about soulmates. Apparently we all have them and if we go to sleep and think about them, we get to meet them in our dreams!”

Saeran was so excited to try it, that it took him hours to finally fall asleep

But when he did, he was suddenly in a field

There were wild flowers in the long grass, and a warm sunny feeling Saeran had never experienced before

Then there was a voice

“Finally! I’ve been waiting for you for so long!”

He turned around and there was a little girl with a wide smile running towards him through the grass

She stopped in front of him, she looked about his age

He was nervous, Saeyoung hadn’t told him what to say, and he had never talked to a girl besides him mother before

“I’m MC, I’m your soulmate!”

You hugged him, and it felt so nice, no one except his brother had ever done that 

You were so nice to him, he never wanted to wake up

His dreams became his way to get away from reality

When Saeyoung would leave to go on errands and his mom was drunk, he would go to sleep and meet you

Even if you weren’t there, the field with the flowers was so nice and warm, it became his favorite place

You taught him the names of the flowers there, and told him about things you learned in school

You became the best thing in his life

Until his mom found out

She woke him from one of these naps once, screaming at him for falling for the lie that was soulmates

She told him you weren't real, you were just a made up lie meant to trick and hurt him

He didn’t want to believe her, but her but he was rarely allowed to sleep now, and Saeyoung had suddenly disappeared

After the loss of his brother and being taken in by Rika, things were better 

Rika took him to paradise and gave him a purpose

He knew she would never lie to him like his brother had, so he listened when she told him to never try to dream of you

She said soulmates weren’t real, and the girl in his dreams was just trying to trick him like his brother

You were sad when your soulmate had stopped coming to the field

You didn’t understand why, he had been perfectly fine one day, then gone forever the next

You spent a majority of your childhood and teen years thinking you had somehow messed up, but you learned to live with it and accept that maybe you would one day meet him, but not now

When you got a message asking you to test a game, you felt compelled to trust the person, so against your better judgement, you willingly went

Meeting Ray gave you such a feeling of nostalgia, the way he acted, the way he talked about flowers and ice cream

It all felt so familiar

You went back to the field every night, on the off chance that he would be there, but it was empty time after time

Ray was confused

He liked you so much, you made him really happy so deep down in his heart

But Rika had said soulmates weren’t real, the girl in his dreams was just part of his imagination

He hadn’t had a desire to go to the field since he was a kid, but now that you had shown up, every time he slept, he felt a pull trying to take him there

Ray was confused and curious as to what this meant

But Searan was angry

When he took over, he didn’t like how you made him feel

That idiot Ray was always blushing over you, and his thought blended into Searans sometimes

He wanted to be mad at you

You reminded him of a lie, something his brother had tricked him into believing

But towards the final day, he was no longer able to fight off the pull, and he fell asleep and found himself in the field

It was just like it was all those years ago, the same warmness and flowers and long grass

The only difference was you, all grown up, sitting in the sunlight

You still waited for him after all those years

After everything he put you through, you still came every night hoping to see...him?

He didn’t understand

He had been horrible to you but you still wanted to see him

He woke up the next day and he was no longer those two personalities, but one that was finally ready to love you the way you loved him all that time

“MC...you opened my eyes.. you’re the only one who has stayed with me all this time.”

“I love you Saeran, I’ll always stay with you.”