#but its amazing and i get so much visualisation out of it? like
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I'm up to issue 9 of Chainsaw Man now and I do not regret this choice in the slightest, it fucking slaps. I'm in romantic and physical love with Quanxi and Violence Fiend really is just a Lil Guy
#again unclear if its truly exceptional or just my lack of experience with comics/manga#but its amazing and i get so much visualisation out of it? like#ill watch the anima at some point but so much if it I can already see perfectly and dynamically#anyway Makima's a devil. gotta be. my guess is manipulation. something old and powerful if she can fuck around with Darkness#i really hope Violence is ok its difficult to guage risk accurately bc like. people absolutely do die#but fiends appear to die and then get back up pretty frequently#hes just a lil guy!!!#and denji over here speedrunning his toxic human relationships#its just. really really good. wish i could afford to get more then 3 volumes a month adfhsjs but! im workin my way through!#i just gotta stop reading all 3 within 2 days lmao
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Hi!! First of all, I wanted to say how much I LOVE Obscura, I’ve played through chapter one enough to get nearly all the endings now!! You guys are doing amazing work, I’m so excited for chapter two!
My question is sort of a writing/planning one! You’ve created such an interesting and complex story that can branch out in so many ways; so what is it like to plan and write something this complex, and what was your process like while developing it? Any tips?
Thank you!! <3
Aw, thank you!
I think our story can look deceptively complex from the outside, but from the inside it's actually pretty manageable (and this would be true for any story you make, too!). I'll show a bit of my process and hopefully that'll help you.
So this is a peek at what my workspace looks like (cropped to avoid showing too much). On the right are all the variables I'm working with, on the left is the script, and that little red square poking in is the preseason testing for Formula 1, because I need background noise to work (and I like F1).
With the variable list visible like this, it's actually very easy to keep track of all the different possible choices the player has made, and so it's pretty easy to either accommodate them or write in ways that suit all possible versions. So that's cheat #1: just keep your variables on hand and you eventually get used to thinking about them as you go.
Another thing that helps is our plot structure. Sam Kabo Ashwell wrote a very helpful blog post that helps visualise the different way choice-games like interactive fiction, CYOA stories, and visual novels can structure their branches. Obscura might look like a "sorting hat" at first, but it's better to think of each route as its own "branch and bottleneck" narrative. No matter what happens in the branches, things always bottleneck to the same place. No matter how your party goes in Oleander's route, either you get a bad end or you end up dancing together. So cheat #2 is to just think about places where your narrative can converge and ensure that your branches will come together to that bottleneck again.
Which isn't to say that this doesn't take work! If you're used to writing totally linear stuff then it can take a little time to get used to thinking in terms of branches and variables. But the good news is that when you start at the beginning of the story, there's not too much to think about. As long as you don't dump a huge number of variables on yourself right away, you can build them up as you get more used to thinking about them as you write.
I hope that helps!
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As it turns out, I unfortunately don't have the time to both gif I Feel You Linger in the Air and write commentary (also, it kind of feels like cheating since I've read the novel and know what's going to happen. I've read some of my mutuals' theories but joining in on the conversation kind of feels like ruining people's fun 😔).
That being said, I love the novel not just as a BL novel but as a beautifully written and crafted (and translated - it comes with so many footnotes!) story in general. Definitely check out the official translation if you like IFYLITA and want to support its writer. It's well worth the money.
I've written before that I was very curious about how the series would approach the way the novel almost treats the past as its own character. Descriptions of history and culture and architecture (and language but unfortunately some of that gets lost in translation by necessity) are so vivid and colourful, and it's such a big part of why I love the novel so much.
You'd need a huge budget (and lots of cgi) to translate this attention to detail into visual form - to the point where it would probably detract from the story itself - but IFYLITA found such an amazing workaround that adds so much depth and colour to the narrative: instead of relying on the environment to tell a story about the past it concentrates on the characters itself.
And tbh at first I was a bit irritated by the large cast of secondary characters (most of which exist only at the very fringes of the story in the novel) because I thought it would take away from Jom and Yai's story. There's an episode early on where 20+ minutes pass without either of them appearing or being talked about.
Only, the story as it exists in the series would simply not have the same impact without Ming and his aging mother, or Fongkaew's tragic backstory, or Prik's family background, or Ueangphhueng and Mei's quiet love story, or the sympathy the series extends towards characters like Khamsaen and James (Robert can get f'ed in both the novel and the series though). It's the intricacy of their relationships and social standing that paints a picture that's just as vivid and vital as Jom's observations of the past in the novel - and I love that. It's such a natural, visual way of storytelling and it complements the novel incredibly well. It's like the novel offers an inside look through Jom's perspective, and the series provides an outside look through showing the characters and their lives.
There's so many other things I'd love to write about eventually (like how the series portraits Yai when in the book we almost always view him through Jom's eyes, or how the series visualises the mystery and horror of Jom's time travel, or how both novel and series treat karma) but giffing comes first because silly moving images is what I'm here for. 🙏
#i feel you linger in the air#ifylita#bl meta#ifylita meta#jane watches stuff#why use many word when few shiny picture also do trick lmao#in which i really really love the novel ok#so everything ifylita-related i write is basically a love letter
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I am all about constructive criticism. I mean, how am I supposed to get better at writing/drawing if people won't be honest with me and give me tips to get better. I personally think that people who can't take constructive criticism aren't very bright. How are they supposed to get better at things if they don't listen to others who are just trying to guide them?
Also, I would love some more tips on how to make the shell better. If you are willing, of course. :)
I am horrible at drawing. I usually have to trace things to get a decent drawing. (For instance, I traced like five different things to make Mikey a pony.)
I'm so much better at coloring than I am at drawing. My writing needs work, too, but I'm getting better.
First of all, can I just say that you shouldnt worry about tracing art to improve your own (as long as u aren't posting it as soley your own but thats a whole other rabbit hole) I did too! It helps build ground work for a good understanding of anatomy and poses.
However there are a few holes in tracing. Forst of all it is quite limiting in the outcome of your work, as your art is stuck static in one pose. this can alkost hinder your ability to see things in '3D' and visualise objects for multiple angles. it can also lead to 'skin wrapping' , which i think is the hole you fell into here (and also a term i just made up now)
with the shell, you only coloured it within Mikey's trace lines - this caused the shell to loose a lot of its mass - making it look, quite frankly, not like a shell.
a way to improve on this is to look at more references of Mikey's shell in the show and its shape from different angles. this can help you get a good idea of how it should look, and it is a good idea to practice drawing it from these angles. this will improve your ability to think in a 3D space, (which is so darn hard, but seriously useful)
however, and you may have noticed this yourself, when you add new additions to the figure, the line art just doesnt line up! the line quality is different!
This is because the line you have done for the addition is Your Line. And we love your line.
so lets make the rest of the traced lineart fit into your style, instead of you fitting yours into theirs okay?
You may notice that when you trace art, the line work is just not the same, the lines are shakier than the original and it just doesn't look as good. this is not a reflection of your skill.
It is because, usually, (at least when I did it) you follow the original line so closely that it turns out shaky, probably taking your pen off the page a few times to take a break from the oen stroke. while the original artist did that line in one sweeping stroke.
a way to fix this, and make the line arr cleaner and more you, is to instead use the drawing as a very close reference. for example:
instead of tracing the exact lines of the art, merely trace the general shapes of the art. not only then do you add your own flair and gesture to the drawing, you are then more free to add more shapes to this sketch.
You can still use the reference drawing as closly as you want, but try to focus less on getting the exact lines copied, and more on the general shape. you linework wont be perfect the first time, it might be really messy compared to your usual tracing, and thats fine! you should see some of my sketches before i refine them!
But these will be your lines, theyll be smoother and more gestural, and overtime you will get better control over your penstrokes doing this.
Okay I cant really think of anymore to add here, I hope this helps! i think this was just one big word vomit lol. Keep drawing!! cause no matter what you do, as long as you are actively drawing you are always improving! dont be afraid to push yourself out of you comfort zone! who cares if it doesnt turn out the way you wanted it to? Its your art, You Created That with your Own Hands, and I think that is amazing.
<3
#asks#animal-lover-forever#i really hope this helped#its always hard for me to articulate my thoughts like this lol#YOU ARE GETTING BETTER#YOU ARE ALWAYS GETTING BETTER#art help#i hope#rottmnt#rottmnt mikey#mlp
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How I see
HIT ME HARD AND SOFT
-as someone with synesthesia.
#1 - SKINNY
I kinda think of skinny as light, pale and soft. I think the lyrics really reflect those elements, especially since the song is mostly about body dysmorphia. And when I think about body dysmorphia I think of pale and colourless things. So everything about this song just lacks colour, but in a good way. I think it symbolises Billie's growth and development through the album. She starts paler but then she slowly develops colour through the songs, also symbolising that she's found herself and she's comfortable in who she is.
#2 - LUNCH
Lunch is definitely a hard one. Whenever I listen to a song, I can always see all the colours in different parts of the song. Especially this one. But it only looks good in my head and to physically make it visual to other people is hard because I had to include all the colours without it looking terrible. So what I did was I kinda channelled the main colours and what came out was blue and orange. Blue being the base of the song, and then orange being the guitar in the background. These two colours and this song make perfect sense to me and I'm super happy about this one.
#3 - CHIHIRO
This song is mostly blue but BITTERSUITE and BLUE are blue already so I wanted to make it more diverse. So I gave the song a listen and decided that the base of the song is blue 100%, and in the chorus of the song you kinda feel melancholic, euphoric, ethereal etc. So I drilled deeper into my brain and decided that in the chorus of this song, I could feel a bit of yellow. I think it adds to that floating, euphoric feel of the song.
#4 - BIRDS OF A FEATHER
Unfortunately my least favourite on this album. I obviously don't hate anything Billie's put out at all, but it screams clean girl. I can't stand clean girl so I have a bit of a dislike towards this song. It's a good song obviously, but not for my ears. It's very soft and dream like, and I think the white and baby pink really reflect it. Love how this is like a polar opposite to LUNCH.
#5 - WILDFLOWER
This was nice to do. Finding and looking through photos really helped me understand this song better. It's the perfect balance between hard and soft. I think this is like the middle man in this album. Especially when you know what it's about. Or who. This reminded me a lot of Guitar Songs (TV and The 30th). It's like a morning walk through a field on an overcast day at your grandma's house. It's a bit of a laid back green. Symbolising the mood of the song.
#6 - THE GREATEST
This was the hardest song I've had to visualise. This song is more of a feeling than a visual. But I'd probably say it's a mix between blue and green. Blue being the base, green being the accents. This whole album definitely has blue in most of its songs. I'm still not sure how to view this song but I think this is the closest I can get.
#7 - L'AMOUR DE MA VIE
I don't think this song needs much of an explanation. It's neon, it's bold, it's different. It's a vibe. The colour perfectly matches the sound of the song. I mostly see red and orange in this song and I think that's to do with fire for some reason. It's hot and it burns your eardrums like a hot branding iron in the best possible way.
#8 - THE DINER
I think the diner has the same look for everyone. It's dark, spooky and possessive. I can't believe it's second least streamed song on the album because it's my no.1. Black is the base of the song because I feel like it's set at night, then we have red because it's hot and bold. I added in some photos of circuses because the little instrumental sounds like a spooky circus. This is THE Halloween song of 2024. Fight me.
#9 - BITTERSUITE
This is such an amazing song. To me it's blue. But a very darkkk blue. It also feels like you're drowning so I incorporated lots of water into it. This feels like swimming at the sea in a storm. It's terrifying and exhilarating in the best way. I think this song would also smell like Eilish no.2 and I'm so sad that this is the least streamed of the album.
#10 - BLUE
this song is the bluest of blue. It's neon. It's again more of an feeling that a visual. Very similar to BITTERSUITE but just more vibrant. I find it hard to explain this one but I think for a song that's also hard to visualise, it's probably the most accurate on the list.
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So recently, I started watching Bluey!
In a way, that was inevitable: I was a brony back in the day (and yes that sure is a whole subject in its own right I'm not getting into right now lmao), I work in a setting where I frequently interact with children, and I'm Australian. It was just a matter of time, and when my aunt over the Christmas hollies demanded my parents and I watch 'the cricket episode', that was just the final permission I needed to do it.
So, those are three potential reasons to watch it: because kids' cartoons can be highly enjoyable and good viewing in their own right, because it'll help me better understand and relate to kids, and because it is The big cultural product coming out of my country for this entire decade probably and that's interesting.
And all of them turned out to be well-founded! It has helped me to visualise a lot better how kids work and learn and live, and it's good viewing: the animation is pretty, the music work is great (some very well-placed classical pieces alongside the Steven Universe-esque chiptunes), and it's equally capable of being sweet and funny and genuinely meaningful. There's a lot that can be said about that; the contrast with the mixed reaction to the 'darker' Avatar remake, or even just the way limitations (in this case, quick 7-minute runtimes) can breed creativity.
But it was that third reason which surprised me the most. I'd heard all the jokes about how American kids are picking up Australian slang and even accents and so forth, but I never properly prepared myself for how... it would feel, seeing my life depicted on TV like that.
It's not like Australians never get to see our country on TV. We have our own reality shows and soapies and all that, but I don't watch the latter and the former... aren't exactly depictions of ordinary everyday life. When Australia does show up in media, it's usually through satire: either Simpsons-style, or our own home-grown Kath and Kim or The Castle. And that's not a knock on either of those last two: they're pitch-perfect depictions of Australian culture and I'd highly recommend anyone who wants to understand Australian humour or social mores to watch both! It's just that they're very... self-deprecating. Which, again: Australian culture. We're like that.
But Bluey is so... beautiful.
I've always had a weird relationship to my country. I've never really fit in much with the culture; I'm too sensitive and sincere for it, and it's usually pretty obvious I think. And the environment? I just don't entirely know how to relate to it. All of our holidays are based on a calendar and geography an entire world away. Native plants and animals and the like always seemed like they Belong To the, well, native Australians. I'm not witchy, I'm not a health junkie, and I'm not super outdoorsy (though I do like a hike now and then!). My main way of interacting with my country is through just walking down the street, and marvelling at how pretty my city is, and how lovely (and/or annoying!) the birds are.
And I get that from Bluey. Something it's good at, even outside my personal connection to it I think, is depicting this certain sense of awe at the world that children can have, when everything is so new and strange and wonderful. The pilot episode features a long, zoomed-in moment of the youngest child encountering a walking leaf bug, and her whispered, thinking-out-loud amazement. 'Why would a leaf want to walk?' indeed!
And there's that: the rainbow lorikeets flocking in trees; the jacaranda flowers softly falling outside the parents' bedroom window. But also the man-made things. The green deck chairs out on the lawn, drinking white wine and cider while the dads barbeque. The sausage sizzle and pavlova. The opening presents Christmas morning and then going for a swim in the pool with your cousins.
It's romanticised up the wazoo; it boggles me a little when people complain about how big the titular character's house is, because... yeah! It's idealised! It's meant to be pretty and comfy and a little wish-fulfilmenty. That's not to say that everything is perfect, but it's larger than life; not to quote the old cliche, but it's a preschoolers' show, for gosh sake.
And for someone who has always loved the world too much and felt silly and cringy and embarrassed by it, there's something really, really lovely about finally getting to see artists direct that love at the actual world I see around me. Not exactly the same; where I live is much drier than Brisbane, for starters. But it's close enough.
This, I really feel like, is a new cultural image of Australia that will resonate in the public memory. Not Mad Max, not Steve Irwin, just a pretty, hilly city by the beach, with bright cockatoos and wandering bin chickens, shallow creeks and gumnut 'dollars', and families gathering for barbeques and friendly games of backyard cricket.
(The cricket episode really is a very good one!!)
#Bluey#so yes I have gotten to see a fair bit more of this relatable Australian culture through the library#but it actually only increased my desire for more I think?#this past Christmas I actually felt a bit. less interested in the winter wonderland fantasy I usually dive into#I actually found myself really wanting to see my own Christmas shown on screen#I'm a couple months late but... here it is!#I'm... more connected to the world around me now. than I was a year ago.#it's nice. :)
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A while ago I made a theory on Project Edens Garden and with Chapter 1 coming up I thought I'd share some more thoughts as my original theories have shifted slightly.
This will include spoilers from the demo (specifically from WeebyNewz's video) so you have been warned.
I'm going to make a tier list of least to most likely to die characters in this post just to try and visualise how I feel at the moment with information we have. Keep in mind this almost definitely will not be accurate when Chapter 1 does release.
Like many others, I originally theorised that Cassidy would be the one to die in this chapter, but honestly it's so in-your-face that it seems like a red herring. Ingrid also gets a lot of screentime in that little segment at the start, but it's less obvious and while it's unlikely that either of then will die yet, it isn't something that can be ruled out at the moment. There's a strong possibility, but it may be a red herring.
I also want to rule out characters who have barely been given any attention (Desmond, Ulysses, Jett, Mark) as since they haven't had much time to shine, I doubt they'll be victims this chapter (blackened is a possibility, but none of them seem to have a motivation to kill currently).
I also want to rule out Diana and Toshiko, Diana because she seems to be being set up as a support to Damon, as she defends him and goes against Wolfgang and I think if she were to die it's more likely for her to die once the despair truly kicks in, as she knows that a murder is possible but doesn't seem to be motivated from what we see. Toshiko seems too plot relevant to die in the first chapter, plus I doubt anyone in the cast would stoop so low as to kill a child, if she is to die it would be late game and probably as a blackened.
Also I should've mentioned this at the start but I'm completely ruling out Damon and Wolfgang, again they're just too plot relevant and I doubt Damon will pull a Kaede, he's not stupid enough to risk it and Wolfgang is in complete denial, he wouldn't kill anyone at this stage, nor would he be an easy target.
In terms of characters I think might live but there's also a strong possibility of then dying are Kai, Eloise, Jean and Wenona. I have my reasons so just hear me out. Kai and Eloise are two charaxters with clear motive to get out as fast as possible (Kai with his career and Eloise with her mother) which makes them decent candidates for becoming blackeneds. I can honestly see Kai as a victim, since he's both an easy target and not many members of the cast like him. Wenona has her buisnesses but her rivalry with cassidy would be interesting if one were to kill the other, but she seems as if she has room for development and I can see her as a mid to late death. Jean also seems to be getting quite a bit of spotlight this chapter, ehich raises some death flags, especially since he and Tozu seem to be at odds as he discovered the secret area. I wouldn't be surprised if he were executed by Mara.
And now for the characters that I think are most likely to die. I think Eva and Grace are both very likely to die. I think Eva could become a blackened to use the groups distrust of her to make herself seem as if she were framed, then use that to pin the blame in someone else because its never the most likely suspect, is it? In the Bible, Eve is the first to fall to temptation, I think Tozu will make her an offer to act as motivation. Or, she could attempt murder and someone will kill her in self defense.
For Grace, there's an audio file in the trailer that includes a distorted version of her screaming "get me out of here" in the first trial, sounds suspiscious right? Grace has also already had a brush with death once in this game, she wants to get out as soon as possible. She's stressed and in a bad place, and she might do something drastic.
Anyway here's the tier list
Anyway this is all speculation, have a good day
And thank you to the devs for making such an amazing fangan!
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by the way i wanted to stop by and tell u that i feel you very much re: your writing struggles and dilemmas!!! like it's so frustrating having so many thoughts and ideas and plots and headcanons etc and feeling like it's physically impossible to get down into words! and it sucks that it's so clearly and easily visualised in our head and yet when we attempt to put words onto paper/document it's like. this is a Mess.
but also literally every time i start criticising my own work these days i try and pull myself back and be like this is literally for me and when i don't put pressure on myself to try and have it perfect and ao3's greatest hits worthy then i usually end up having a blast typing out all my lil funky fic things and it's fun again. and then i wanna share it with a friend and i realise it's not coherent enough for that then it sucks again. then i tell myself its for FUN and it's a vicious cycle lmao
ANYWAY all that to say i hear you wholeheartedly and i think whatever you've managed to write is amazing and every little fic and au you've ever thought is probably incredible and i hope u always know that ❤️🫶🏻
Aaaand two days later~ 🙈
I already started writing a lengthy answer back to you, but then Tumblr decided to be a fucking 🍆 once again and deleted everything, so. 🤪
Anyway, I wholeheartedly agree with everything you said here. Having all these ideas, all these tropes and AUs, all those scenes and dialogues circulating in your brain and yet you feel like it's not good enough—definitely not good enough for publishing. You keep telling that to yourself: it's not good enough, it will never be good enough, you'll never be one of those popular writers who write these total bangers one after another, so why bother, right?
But I also wholeheartedly agree with that statement that you should primarily write for yourself. I also had a lot of fun recently writing something on my docs that I still haven't fully published on ao3 or anywhere else, and I gotta say, I kept rereading that work over and over again because that one I truly wrote it for myself. Like, it felt so good to be self-indulgent for a change (I honestly can't recall the last time I've genuinely enjoyed reading my own writing before that, which is very telling I think), and when I suddenly experienced that feeling—that pure joy—once again... That feeling was so euphoric.
Like, what even is the point of writing anything if it feels like nothing but pain and misery all the fucking time? 🙈 It should be fun and self-indulgent. Most of the time, at least. It's really fucking hard for sure, but it still should be fun.
Anyway, I'm rambling again here, so, thanks so much for this ask and your words of encouragement. Made me feel a little bit better again. <3 I also want to say that whatever you're currently writing, even just daydreaming about, I genuinely hope you're having a blast at it. And if you ever decide to publish/share any of those stories of yours, I'm 100% there are people out there who are ready to kiss your feet just for writing that story and sharing with them. I certainly feel that way about certain stories, even authors, so. Who knows, maybe our stories could have the same kind impact on other people, too.
Gotta stay positive and just... goddamn write. Right? :D
#replies#hotdadlicense#there are a few tropes and AUs on my mind right now and it's absolutely killing me#but it's also giving me such euphoria right now so... maybe i'll write them one day#who knows#<333
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My thoughts on... Black Widow 2020 (#1-5) "The Ties That Bind"
So after finishing the incredible 50 issue run of Captain Marvel by Kelly Thompson I decided to start reading Black Widow (2020) which also happens to be written by her! I was super excited to read it because Black Widow is one of my favorite characters in the MCU, and while I had casually read some of her comics a few years ago I never really was able to delve into everything the character had to offer in the comics. So it was super excited I now have that chance! And I have to say it absolutely blew my mind how amazing these first 5 issues were, all of my expectations were exceeded.
This run started off amazing and immediatly grabs your attention within the first three pages with its amazing art and visualisation of action sequences. It was actually incredibly how fluid and smooth the action in this. It was drawn in such a way that you could easily understand the flow of the action while also seeing every single detail of it. The art in general in this is absolutely fantastic in everyway. I was really intrigued by the setup of this first arc. Black Widow getting taken out only to reappear as a super happy mother in a perfect family. I was really curious to see as to what actually happened. And as the story progresses you get more and more Truman Show vibes. I think it was a really great pick to have Arcade be the mastermind behind it as this type of thing was completely up his alley. I loved Clint's and Bucky's involvement in this as well. Them trying to figure out what is going on with Nat and not being sure whether they should pull her out of this or not. It's really bittersweet in a way, as they realize it is too good to be true for Nat but still hesitating to pull her out as she seems genuinely happy and at peace. It's kind of tragic too as I imagine she hasn't had much peace or chances to just live life and be happy, and now that she has that chance she gets forced to leave it all behind. Her slowly remembering her old self and then remembering who she was was so well done. The way she slowly took upon her old spy habbits was great. In general they did an amazing job at showing how much her being a spy affects her mind, how she percieves things and how she stands in her daily life. Little things like putting tape on the door so she would know when someone was waiting on her, stuff like that really did a lot for her characterization and showing how much being a spy influences her daily life. The moment she realizes everything and is back to her old self was kind of heartbreaking in a way. As she knew from that point on that she wouldn't have the chance anymore at a peaceful and blissful live with her husband and kid. Even worse, that she would have to break all ties with them so they would be safe and wouldn't get caught up in her troubles. It must've been such a painful moment for Nat, because you see that she genuinely cares for them and genuinely wants a normal life with them. But she just can't. And it's super heartbreaking because you know it really hurts her that she can't have that. The final few issues of this arc were defintely the most emotional and admittedly made me tear up a bit. Them trying their best to bring Nat's husband and kid to safety. And just as she checks up on them and turns her back they get blown up by the people behind this entire mess. That moment was incredibly emotional and heartbreaking, especially due to how good the art was during it. Nat crying as you see her face through the fire, realizing what just happened, and why it was right of her to force them to break all connections with her. It's very painful. I'd imagine that in the back of her mind there was a small part that was convinced that they could make it work somehow and they she could have her happy life with them. And now she gets the ultimate proof that she can't, no matter how much she wants it.
The reveal afterwards that it was a fakeout and that in reality her husband and kid were safe somewhere else on the planet was really shocking. Because it completely recontectualizes the scene where they get "blown up" and Nat cries. One could say she was just acting so everyone would be deceived and convinced of what happened. But I feel like those were genuine tears because like I said she gets the ultimate proof that she can't have a normal and happy life with them. But furthermore, from that point on they're basically "dead" in Nat's eyes. She can't ever see them again, no matter how much she wants it. She'll never know whether they'll be happy and never will get to see her kid grow up and that must be absolutely heartbreaking to realize. And that's what I think she started to realize as the plan was set in motion and the explosion happened. Her happy, perfect family is gone forever and even though they're still out there, she can't ever see or reach them. It's incredible tragic. But the moment that really hit me was this piece of dialogue she has with Bucky afterwards, who was the only one in on the plan: "There's an ache in me I've never felt before. In all the things I have been through... the highs and lows... the peaks of joy and the depths of sorrow...all pain and regret...nothing has felt as empty as this ache. It feels like and endless hole. And I cannot imagine how something so dark and endlees and empty could ever be filled." Seeing her say this and breakdown into bucky's arms on the floor was incredibly emotional and heartbreaking. It really made me tear up because you realize how tragic all of this is. And it only gets proven further in the last few pages of issue 5 as you see both Nat and then her husband and kid sit at the front of their houses each in a different part of the world as Nat talks about finding peace and happiness thinking about how she might be watching the same sunset as them. It's such an emotional page. This first arc just completely sold me on this run. I was left feeling absolutely speechless and emotional after finishing this arc. It really shows how tragic Nat as a character is and how bittersweet her life is. The trajectory of her life is such a tragic one but yet she manages to always push through and be better, even now when she basically lost her entire newfound family that she was genuinely at happy and at peace with. But still she pushes through and wants to be better because of them. And that's what really makes this character so interesting to me. She's been through so much, suffered so much and yet she still stands strong even though it's not always easy and even though she'll never have the normal life she might dream of. She does the best she can given her circumstances and knows who she is and what she can do, but also the things she isn't and can never have. I'm so happy I decided to start reading this run. I'm completely hooked and this first arc just left me feeling speechless and emotional. The art and writing of this run is just absolutly incredibly, every action moment is perfectly visualized and the writing just really sells her as this incredibly spy that can't get topped by anyone while also being a really vunreable person deep down. The last few issues were just incredible and I can't wait to see how Nat will evolve from this. Will she be able to become better for them as she promised or will she give in and take revenge for what she lost? It's going to be really interesting to see where they'll take the story from here. And I for one can't wait to read it!
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The Kid Christmas Sketchbook Part 1
A peek inside the development of my newest book 'Kid Christmas: Of The Claus Brothers Toyshop'
Hi all. Not too long until ‘The Big Day’. To celebrate I thought that I would give you all a peek into my sketchbook and maybe offer a little insight into how the idea for my latest book ‘Kid Christmas: Of The Claus Brothers Toyshop’ developed.
Scruffy Beginnings
From what I can remember the idea began with the title. I had one of those strange, day-dreaming type questions, what was Father Christmas called when he was younger? ‘Boy Christmas’? ‘Child Christmas?’ ‘Son Christmas?’
‘Kid Christmas’.
It just sounded perfect, it sounded like a Superhero’s name. I really liked it.
So, as usual when the first spark of an idea strikes I started doodling in my sketchbook. This is a very exciting point in a project where the possibilities are absolutely endless. The story can go anywhere. Its exciting, but these quick little sketches- which I always assume will never be seen by anyone but me (and here I am showing you all)- are always, incredibly, outrageously scruffy. But thats kind of the point I think, those first drawings are quick and urgent (and look like they were possibly drawn by my dog).
And here they are….
Concept Art
The idea sat brewing in my mind for a while. And even though it was nowhere near formed I decided to tell Katie-my editor at Frances Lincoln Children’s Books- all about it. She was also excited by this first little nugget of an idea and asked if I could mock up some artwork. This is the kind of thing that you have to do to get the powers that be at publishing companies on board with a project, especially as all I had at that moment was the aforementioned scruffy sketches.
The image that I created was this one:
I really liked the idea of the story being set in a Victorian era. When I think of the perfect looking Christmas I see the snow capped rooftops of a Dickensian London. Like a lot of people ‘A Christmas Carol’ is one of my favourite books, and the image of Christmas that story presents was definitely the look I was hoping to capture. Also, the recognisable character of Santa that we all know and love- the big beard, big red coat, etc was first depicted in the mid 1800’s so it just felt like the right time period to set this story in. I wanted this first piece of concept art to very much capture that Victoriana feel, and I think that it does.
Thankfully, Katie and the other kind folk at Frances Lincoln Children’s Books agreed that it was an exciting idea and based on this first initial visualisation and a handful of possible story idea notes the the project was remarkably given the go ahead.
Which was amazing! And please note, it doesn’t usually happen this way. I would recommend having at least an outline of a narrative to go along with your concept art and sketches, before pitching your idea to a publisher.
But yes, the story.
Chiselling Out A Story.
I had a main character, a concept of sorts, a setting and a great deal of support from my incredible publisher. Now I just needed the most important thing. An actual story.
Again, I went back to my Sketchbook. I started to think about the sub-characters. Who would Santa have in his life at this point? How would he be able to get hold of so many toys? Why did he decide to dedicate his life to delivering all of those toys to children every single year?
The idea of Santa’s uncles being toymakers and owning the Claus Brothers Toyshop quickly developed and, through more scruffy sketching, I started to slowly chisel the narrative out.
Thumbnails
Once I had the basic outline of the story in my head and in note form, I started to piece the pages together through-once again- very, very scruffy ‘thumbnail’ sketches.
Again, this stage is really exciting as the story really starts to form and some big decisions about structure, plotting and pacing start to take place. The thumbnails give me a good idea of how the story could flow and what information to include in each spread. Despite the fact that so much of it will still change in time, this step is the first true visualised version of the whole book. It’s an opportunity to see it on page, not just in my head.
Here are a few of the thumbnails. If you have the finished book you might be able to see the pages that these little doodles eventually became.
So, as we have deciphered the key word for all of these stages seems to be ‘scruffy’.
For me being very scruffy and quick and loose with my drawing during this stage helps me bring the ideas out. Theres an urgency and a freedom to it where there are no creative barriers. At this stage everything is scribbled down with no inhibitions. No one is going to be looking at the quality of the drawings, their sole purpose is to be the first building block of a bigger-hopefully slightly tidier- project.
Which brings me on to the subject of Part 2’s post, which will look at the first, official ‘Rough Draft’ of the book and the all important cover sketches. This stage is were other people- including my editor and art director at Frances Lincoln- will actually need to see what I am doing and offer feedback on the sketches that I do. So the pressure builds a bit here.
Gulp. What a cliffhanger :)
Keep an eye out for Part 2 coming in a few days.
Thanks for reading all x
Kid Christmas Sketchbook Part 2 Coming Soon.
#kid christmas#kidchristmas#illustratot#sketchbook#process#illustrator process#book process#writing process#kid lit art
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After doing the Joker 2 review, guess I'll do one for Megalopolis too. So watched a camrip of it, cause after the reception all my friends where scared going too the theather lol, but still: In short, I didn't like it as much as Joker 2 - but that probably means little to most, cause Iliked that one quite a lot.
But Megalopolis was interesting too - but one has to get the mood and tone of it - hence why it's called "a fable" on the title screen - it kinda is a farce on porpuse - many scenes, many of the best ones, are super over the top, just parodying the ridicolousness of the US's real life "new rome" wants - from virginal pop stars that get rebranded as hellish rebels after getting exposed in all ways of the word, to transvestite presidential candidates and other funny shit, like literal wrestling, both greek and american. Yet I'm not saying all of the farce works - cause the one that doesn't is the one which is not trying to be it - the whole "megalopolis", this city that is a metaphor for humanitys worth and potential - sadly fails the most - because it is supposed to be brillian, inspiring and groundbreaking, yet all the visualisations fail, on some level. One of the worst examples of that, is when the city is shown in full cgi "glory" - the lacking and video gamey looking special effects are only made worse by the total lack of originality in art direction or just any novelty - the city of the future might as well be from "meet the robinsosn" or any generic "this is what society if X happened" meme -
But those can work as either being kitch, or because they are jokes, yet in Megalopolis, everything depends on this one thing being real and aspirational - it could fail to being too ambigious, that would still work, but it looking like out of a toothpaste commercial is just...eh Yet maybe I'm too harsh - maybe it is supposed to look retrofuturistic, to even remind us to Copolas friends cgi worlds from the star wars prequels, which now often mocked, where something new - and which have been abandoned for nostalgia and screams for "real effects like when I was a kid in the 80s" More realistically, it could be that Copola is just old, and I dont say that with any malice, but that he just thinks it looks a lot cooler and original than it is - like my grandpa being amazed by a VR headset while I think its an embarassing waste of time. But still, even with this seemingly giant blunder - I think I am selling the movie short, because I don't regret watching it, even as a camrip where I could see a sudden shadow lifting up and walking out lol:
Yet that segways me into an interesting visual choice - a 9/11 esque tragedy being depicted by having the shadowws of the people be seen on the building walls - one of many great and interesting visual scenes. But it wasn't even just empty spectacle, the threat of a "broken Soviet Satelite" did obviously hint to Americas own fears of living in the shadow of the cold war, and it's new enemies emmerging literally from the sky 9/11 style. So I hope I didn't just shit talk the movie cause it was enjoyable in the end, even if it kinda felt a bit naively optimistic with the evil trump guy getting mussolini lynched and all the good guys making up and going to tommorow after giving a cartoon level good guy speech lol. But speaking of animation - I think this movie would have been praised to high heavens if it was made into an anime or something lol - then all the absurdity, the camp and the alternate history stuff would have been accepted without question and praised as "daring" - (or maybe not because a obviously satirical netflix pseuod anime "neo yokio" got mocked as "so bad it's good" for obvious humor and commentary because it was too strange and too disimilar from family guy or pokemon at the same time) Another simmilarity one could see is with Kurosawas "Dreams" - because that one was also a highly visually orientaited movie which was dragged down by a naive old man vision of the world "we just need live with nature in peace" "we just need to work together" - but do to my own biases I agree with Copolas childish "love will save the world message" more so it is what it is. And hey, Kurosawas real final film was his best and most interesting one, so maybe Copola will do the same. I dunno, I cant control time that much to see into the future for sure.
Agreed about the anime. I agree on the CGI but I thought the style itself was interesting, Art Nouveau replacing Art Deco as I said in my piece!
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"hey hows the writing going today?"
me with an armful of floor plan sketches: dONT LOOK AT ME
so yeah not much writing today lmao
floor plan rambles below the cut cause why not!!!
So clockwise from top left: Rhosynel's family home > Boromir's Quarters > Héobald's home > The Meduseld
Rhosynel's Home: Rhos's home is a decent sized one level building in the fourth level of Minas Tirith, it serves as a good midway point between the various inhabitants different job, and just about fits all seven family members (plus Ilmara)! Rhos's parents (Rhysnuar and Tholcred) manage the stables within the sixth level, while Rhymenel works in the Houses of Healing (and Wrennarys trains there) while Hamasael works as a merchant within the marketplace, and Rhos is up and down the City like a yo-yo.
There's an L shaped living space with the kitchen in the upper L and the dining and living area in the lower part. A corridor (which I should probably narrow and add a door to) leads to the four bedrooms, Rhos opted for the smallest room once Faelrys was born, and a tiny washroom.
I like to think its probably reasonably standard size for the mid levels idk
Boromir's Quarters: OKAY SO I imagine there's a larger complex for the Stewards family, but I also really liked the idea of Boromir basically having a bachelor pad, which gives him a semblance of privacy away from his father, his own safe space so to speak. I DO imagine this is separated from the Stewards Complex by a single corridor, so he's not fully away from his kin.
A decent entrance way with space for shoes/coats/weapons to be dropped, leading into a spacious living area which is semi-open plan between the sitting/dining/study, but can be portioned off with screens if he wishes. There's a fireplace directly opposite the door, with a very nice painting of Finduilas above it. The dining table is big enough for 8ish people, and he has a private study because this man is absolutely a workaholic. He has a large bedroom (with a large bed hee hoo) and a small private balcony with a table/chair for reading, as well as a closet and washroom off to one side.
Honestly it's probably reasonably humble considering he could have remained within the larger complex, or even opted for a bigger set of quarters. Also there's no kitchen cause let's face it they have servants to keep them fed and cook elsewhere.
Héobald's Home: We've not reached this house in Swift Wings but it DOES crop up eventually so I wanted to sketch it out anyway. This house is based within Edoars, the films has the city being a bit sparse, so I've headcanoned it as being a little more built up. I've been visualising this building as being a bit like a tudor town house, tall and narrow and somewhat skeewiff from the outside.
The entrance hall is narrow, with low ceilings and thick beams, but it leads to a warm kitchen/living space (passing through a space under the stairs to access the back room), and is nice and cosy. There's a washroom downstairs, which also acts as storage and laundry. To get upstairs the staircase is very narrow with low beams and leads to a narrow landing and four kinda cramped rooms.
Since Héobald lives with his three adult kids, his daughters husband, AND two twins, their bedrooms are cramped but warm even in winter, with thick knitted blankets and oh whats this Only One Bed you say? I wonder how that got here.
Meduseld: Full disclosure for this layout I found this neat floor plan and based my ideas off it.
The distinctive great hall with its throne, pillars, and fire pit, are fairly akin to that of the movies. But from there I've created side and rear chambers accessed by corridors (and I've just realised I've utterly neglected anywhere to wash. amazing.) To the left we have the Heirs Chambers, increasing in rank the closer they get to the Kings Chambers, while on the right is either rooms for visiting dignitaries, established lords, or just flexible living to be used as needed (aka I ran out of ideas)
The three rooms at the back are for the Kings use, and consist of a private study, his own bed chamber, and then a council room. Fun thing I thought of, directly behind the throne is the fireplace of the kings room as I'd like to think that residue heat may seep through the wall and warm the back of the throne a little lol.
anyway, now to fend off the urge to draw an entire map of Minas Tirith
cause i wont lie i really really want to
#moth fic#on swift wings#lets face it I'm probably going to try sketching the city next#because I like to know where things are and keep things consistant#and considering how Minas Tirith features heavily in ALL my fic plans it would be useful
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Spackle, Glitter and 90s Algorithms
Oh boy, did I get schooled lately. Namely, I mentioned Suno and Udio, the Great Automatic Discopolizators, to someone who's into music, coding and weird software projects from thirty years ago. I really haven't expected something so simplistic and outdated from those websites, particularly now, but hey, "AI" is nothing but a gold foil sticker slapped on any half-assed algorithm these days.
what am I looking at exactly? That specific website appears to be running on a standard "Midi Bard System", loaded with the various sample libraries that have been published over the last century that sample libraries have gotten published. Mixed with several libraries similar to OpenUTAU The "Midi Bard System" operates on a similar methodology as the Jabberwocky Poetry Generation system. Yes, the Jabberwocky Poetry generator is referred to as an "AI"--but it lacks any form of sophistication so as to make path-finding in 90s RTS games seem like fscking Einstein Look, it looks like the main source of this dispute is you not actually being as familiar with computers, electronic music and any of the underlining systems involved in creating them, that what essentially is a fairly cheap trick can seem like excessively advanced technology What I am seeing here, is an old toy--that LISP enthusiasts would go on about to not end--being loaded up to the gills with samples and instruments to work with--based largely upon what has been published over the last century to legally make use with But okay, I guess a concession here is "The Bard Midi Toy is _technically_ something you can call an AI" But like... this is literally just the Jabberwocky methodology being granted more stuff than text to throw onto a page This is not as advanced as you are making it out to be
I will note that I am impressed that somebody took a toy from thirty years ago, and jam packed it with ALL of the Midi Instruments (ALL OF THE THEM) and every sample library from the last Century A toy that mostly didn't get much usage outside of "neat idea" due to how little CPU cycles people had, that music sequencing kind of required heavy optimisation to be a thing. So having an "AI" (by early 1990s standards I suppose we could call it that) that was inclined to put out stuff that wasn't what it was asked for--was not as much of an interesting thing to do As per background music, it would be done for a bit, but turned off due to its creations sounding "too samey" after a while -=- But no, this is not a new development in AI. This is literally somebody taking a toy that was only slightly more sophisticated than visualisers--and just throwing it onto a turbo charged server farm, with every Midi Instrument and Sample Package made thus far And yes, it _is_ able to be called an "AI"--but based upon the standards of a time period where Graph Theory was never well implemented into software--and Rubber Banding as a defacto standard for AI in games
Yowch. That kinda explains a lot of the stuff, particularly the way DMCA bots aren't picking up on any of it because it's - shockingly - original enough, slapped together from instrument samples and synthesized voice and not, you know, some form of mathemagical fairy dust made out of actual copyrighted songs, but what I still don't understand is how it imitates the voices of actual singers, particularly more distinctive ones like Lemmy Kilmister and Kazik Staszewski.
It also explains how other sites, particularly ones with more manual fine-tuning, work, but the most amazing thing is that we're dealing with rusted-out thirty-year-old junkers covered in spackle and glitter. That tech was out there for thirty years and only now it has powerful enough hardware to run on and gullible clientele to pay for it.
#ai technology#tech#technology#Suno.AI#Udio.com#Suno#Udio#ai music#mike's musings#artificial intelligence
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okay get ready for some technicalities, unnecesary categorisation, long gushing and some ranting
First Category: The Original
soooo i think it would be unfair to call the original A3!JP an adaptation because it's the original, it's not adapting from something else, so this one gets its own category
Second Category: Adaptations I Have Engaged With
that said, i DO consider the localisations some sort of adaptation, since it's taking the original material and adapting it not only to another language but to appeal to an specific audience, which i think was done brilliantly in the case of the Eng loc, because of this, the best adaptation to me is A3!EN (i miss her every day)
in a close second comes Esute/Mankai Stage, you can't have a game about theatre and then not put on a great stage adaptation for it! and i think esute succeeds at what it set out to do! there are some nitpicks i have here and there (RIP Banri being in Summer Act 2) but I think that what they have managed to do so far has been brilliant Not only we get a faithful adaptation of the original story, but we get songs to go along and flesh out scenes and characters in a different light, both in the plays themselves and in the non play songs/albums they have (Muse my beloved (no shit tumblr user arigatonamuse)), these songs help us grasp a lot of the characters that we could maybe miss given the omission of Izumi and her narration on the stage (that's one change i completely understand), and it gives us a new perspective that maybe wasn't there in the original while still remaining in character and in line with the story! Additionally! the visual aspects of the stage, the blocking and usage of the different levels in the stage adds SO MUCH to the narrative, it is obviously very well thought out and analysing their choices has been a delight to me Not to mention that just being able to see the actual plays come to life in their lil song montages has been amazing And with the things that they do that aren't in game or in the original story like 4 Seasons With You and the shuffle cast plays! i LOVE LOVE LOVE what they did with the shuffle plays, Homare's Dewey lives in my mind RENT FREE and i think that for every character, these changes in cast gave them a chance to explore the nuances of each of them as actors and what they bring onto the stage, what makes it so only they can bring to life their own specific version of a character, and so on, it's a brilliant exploration and i want more of it AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON THE STAGE CAST! I LOVE THEIR BACKSTAGE PICS SO MUCH (i still miss Makki and his goofing off with MizuKen but oh well) this is long enough as it is and i wanna scream more but uh Esute gets second place as an adaptation i've engaged with only because of the couple nitpicks i have about them removing certain characters or scenes
lastly there's the anime... don't get me wrong, i didn't dislike the anime, not really, it was an okay adaptation given the constraints they had aki arc was adapted pretty well, even if they cut out the scene where Banri and Juza defend each other from Banri's old acquaintances which leads to Azuma making his first appearance i loved how they did Banri's portrait and i do think that this one is the strongest adaptation when it comes to that portrait in particular Also, like in the stage, being able to visualise things was AMAZING, it gave me a lot of fuel for analysis (thank you Mankai Kisetsu for hearing me out there and analysing things with me!) but where the anime fails for me is on fuyu arc previous arcs HAD taken away scenes that are important to me, and i had been upset at that before, but i understood that they had very strict constraints and were on a time crunch, plus the story still flowed okay and did justice to the characters most of the time but then fuyu came and it became almost solely tasutsumu focused, putting the other three characters' stories on the background... not getting the Azuma and Hiso scenes and development HURTS and it hurts the story too, as you kinda don't care as much about them through the entire thing honestly i think the anime did Azuma the dirtiest, not only cutting out his fuyu scenes but the one in aki too? the one that explains why he's in mankai to start with? i'm not even an Azunee oshi but i do not like how they cut his story so short also it's a hard one to revisit too! because the anime did NOT change a certain someone's voice! so hearing it is very uncomfortable to me now still, i DO believe that they did okay, i REALLY enjoyed the anime as it was coming out, i loved talking, gushing and analysing things about it with my friends, it's an adaptation with a special place in my heart, faults and all
this is long enough as it is but... Third Category: Adaptations I Have NOT Engaged With
This one i can keep short, since i don't know enough to talk about it in depth Here we have
A3!CN
A3!TW
Comics Adaptation - i am making grabby hands at this
Comics Anthology - ditto
Mankai Movie - this one i REALLY wanna watch
Novel Adaptation - this one i also wanna get my hands on
and more i may not be aware of ofc, i'm not ranking these, as i don't have the knowledge to do so
and, for the last category, we have what i call "not quite part of the game but also not an adaptation on its own"
Here we have the CDs with all the music, Mankai Manga Sengen, and the Anni books and more stuff i may not be aware of the stage's Troupe LIVEs could also fit in this category but i already gushed about them above so uh... double mention lol
I am also not ranking these ones as I feel they're too different from each other to make a fair assessment of which one i like better
Mankai March question 6!
Yesterday was kinda a weird question, huh? Don’t worry, this one should be easy! What’s your favorite adaptation of A3! ? Is it the original game? Or maybe the stageplays? Or the movie? The anime or manga? Maybe you’ve read the light novels, too!
(Also happy birthday Madoka I’m so sorry I forgot I love you I prommy)
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Hi , I chanced upon your writings one day and just want u to know, I really enjoy reading your fan fics/ short stories. I think u are such a very extremely multi talented person and I really do admire you online. When u write I can really visualise the scenes. To give some examples, my favourite stories so far is Starlit Murder Covetousness. I love how u portray Iriya and Leena because they love/miss each other so much and want to be back together again but it was so difficult for them to confess it and let each other know how they truly feel. And how u linked the story with its title, at the beginning and the end with theme “starlight” is absolutely brilliant, when Leena left because of her interpretation of starlight the nickname linking to a third party and left Iriya ( because really she didn’t wanna leave but the “starlight” thought she had prompted her to make the decision ) and because Leena left, Iriya was disappointed and hurt and this led to their final last meeting, this is so brilliant and “real life like” I also like your letters to Elayna series , it’s totally heartbreaking and I can feel the OC Tymon Lannister’s brokenness and missing Elayna Reyne so much it’s so realistic too. Actually my fave OC is actually Tymon Lannister , not sure why he is frequently labelled as the bad guy because I totally admire his crazy devotion to Elayna Reyne despite all odds against him. Thanks for the amazing short stories lady kenobi, it’s good escape for me from sometimes the difficulties/ monotony in real life, reading your fics, being anonymous really helps, allow people to say good things they feel shy to say. I mean no harm being anon, just wanted to discuss some my thoughts reading your stories. Because of you, I’m also encouraged to go back to writing and get back to some arts stuff that I used to do in school previously. U are such a smart talented person , keep the good works going - anon speaks
!!!!!!!
First of all, anon, you made my fucking day with this thank you so much!!! Hell, not even my day, my whole week! This means so so so so so much to me you have genuinely no idea how much and how happy this made me
I'm so happy you like both of those fics! I'm hoping to restart Starlit Murder again soon-ish? I think my motivation for it might being coming back! I'm hoping to get a one-shot with Thorn and Iriya out at some point so I can build their backstory more. I have lots of plans for My Dear Elayna. I am curious to see what you think of Tymon once the story is over!
Seriously, thank you so much for this message. It made me so happy, like break into a giggle fit happy. And I'm absolutely honored to be the reason you feel encouraged to go back to writing and creating! That is the highest compliment I feel I can get as a creator
Seriously. Thank you so so so so so much!!!!!!!!
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@anpanseok
Hi there! I don’t want to sound repetitive but apologies for the extreme delay. I hope you receive this ship well and I hope you are having an amazing day by the time you see this. Before I leave and let you get to the ship I just wanted to say that I had so much fun doing this for you, I absolutely adore your personality 100% bias material in my opinion. In short I think you have everything in you to be a star/ celebrity and I loved visualising this for you.
Anyways back to the ship!
~Your Company~ YG Entertainment
~Group Name~ ARA
~Members~ 20
~Debut Date~ 27th of March, 2019
~Pre-Debut Days~
Before we launch into the details of your time as a YG trainee, just know that you really did work hard for your position. In a company like YG it is competitive and cuthroat at times, but as a result of your drive and motivation the general assumption was that you were an industry plant. Or at least a trainee that YG had a strong bias towards. I just want to mention this because it really doesn’t discredit the amazing amount of effort you displayed and still continue to display.
Something that actually carried you through your years as a trainee was the fact that you were so calculating and intelligent. It didn’t take you long to figure out what YG was seeking in a trainee and as soon as you caught on you went full steam ahead. Your passion regarding the whole matter scared the other trainees, it was a typical “possessed dancer” case. Your passion and will to get stuff done was the perfect combination, which saw you making it into ARA and debuting as an actual idol.
You seemed daunting at first to the other trainees, mainly because of your height and confidence but you actually became quite loved and welknown amongst all of the trainees once they got the opportunity to know you. This is part of the reason why you get along with the other members of ARA because most of them are your pre-debut friends.
There is also so much respect towards you, because as much you wanted to succeed you actually took time out to help the other trainees who needed advice on stronger stage presence or how to execute certain moves correctly. It was rare to see trainees in such a competitive environment look outside of themselves and assist others. This was a great trait to have and these kind actions that you were willing to do actually benefited you so much in the future.
~About You~
~Your Position/s~ Main Dancer & Vocalist
ARA is often seen as the antithesis to NCT but besides a group name that consists of three letters and the many members that ARA is home to, NCT and ARA are nothing alike. Your group isn’t as “technologically advanced” as SM but a lot of your devoted fanbase comes from the fact that all 20 girls are very diverse, giving representation to those who otherwise feel overshadowed by society and their standards. This can refer to outer aspects such as appearance but it mainly comes down to our personalities, even if neither of you outwardly mention it you kind of strike down the societal norms that are imposed in the kpop industry. Don’t worry while this is what your group is known for that isn’t the entire motif of the group, its just something that influences your fans to stan your group.
Ara is quite a refined group in terms of style, though it seems like an interesting combination of genres ARA is very sure in themselves. Meaning you guys could literally pull off any concept flawlessly. You vary from your sister group Blackpink in the way that you aren’t a typical girl crush, “bad bitch” type group. You maintain elegance yet you aren’t Ive or Red Velvet, that’s truly the beauty of your group. See it as your group has made steps into a direction that was previously undiscovered, there is method and creativity, the members of your group who specialise in songwriting and producing really value music and have mentioned influences both from past and present artists, and artists both kpop and non-kpop. Somehow a nice medium is created where you pay homage to other artists while creating something so magnificantly unique and distinct.
At the end of the day that’s what ARA is, a group that does so well in being themselves, so much so that they easily became a group known for their kindness that extends to the fans themeselves, similar to Seventeen and Carats.
Now we have discussed the group, and yes there are 20 members but each member has a presence so distinct from the other, so keep in mind yes you have many “sisters” but you are never overshadowed since you also play a very important role in your group. ARA was a very well-constructed group even during pre-debout, basically YG had a vision and they were very strict on making it work. So regardless of the size of the group the positions weren’t liable to change, so you were able to comfortably sit in the position of main dancer.
A lot of your efforts goes towards being a dazzling performer, your efforts are never undermined, your fans honestly adore you so much. It’s not unfair, they obviously hold the other members in a high regard but your personality manages to win people over quite easily, even if they didn’t stan your group. You’re a breath of fresh air personality-wise, your cheerful nature is so comforting. You are just very genuine as a person, you are never something that you’re not. Aka you aren’t acting cheerful, you just are. Also can we just talk about how you literally have the right personality to be an idol?? You’re such an interesting person in general, so like hear me out you could post so many daily life vlogs and everyone would eat that up. You are actually a very mature, stable pillar to lean on for your group and the entire fandom, but you also aren’t extremely bossy or a prude. Just know that you are definitely an up-and-coming golden child.
~Debut Song~ Ruby Red in the style of Witch Hunt by Bibi
~Other Songs Include~
Temper Trap in the style of Devil by CLC
Magnifique in the style of nanana by MCND
Battle Cry in the style of My Heart Skip a Beat by PURPLE KISS
~Debut Album~ Flare
~Stage Outfits~
~Relationships~
~Best Friend~ Shuhua ((G)I-DLE)
Now there is actually a very surprising dynamic between the two of you. Shuhua has a very distinct personality, people know who she is as a result of her confidence and lack of remorse when it comes to saying how she truly feels. It’s actually very similar to how the fans perceive you, you are genuinely yourself though you are more known for your cheery nature and strong work ethic compared to Shuhua and her fiery nature, you still have a very strong friendship.
Shuhua is the “yes girl” type of friend when it comes to you, she just has so much trust and faith that you will do good, no matter what you do. Essentially she is very biased towards you, often you get a more loving honest side of her. However if she can’t see where you are coming from or she thinks you’re acting irrationally (which rarely happens) she will always call you out for it.
That really is the beauty of your friendship with her its always so honest, and in this case honesty is a strength. Though you are both youthful and outgoing it is a very mature friendship, you both know how to give support which leads to an ideal friendship.
Shuhua absolutely bounces off of your personality, she is able to let loose and actually have fun with you. Your humour is something that caught her off guard at first and even if she had to get used to it, she came to love it. You are one of the few people that can make her smile without fail. And since she is so platonically whipped for you, you can easily persuade her to do anything you wish. You want her to bake with you? Done. You want her to dance with you? Done. You want an ARA and (G)I-dle collab? Done. You want her to play roblox with you? She will hesitate but DONE. This is practically where he yes girl attitude comes in, she will just be so down to spend time with you inbetween your busy schedules.
The last think I want to mention is that, this friendship was destined to be a good one from the start. Your openness to conversation and meeting new people was enough for Shuhua to feel comfortable. She never felt the need to filter who she truly was, she knew you could handle it. One of her favourite things is meeting up after a long time, while she did still text you she knows that you’re something else in person and she can never contain her excitement, she just wants to catch up and spill every thought and feeling that she has been bottling up inside for the day she can finally chill with you.
~Friends~
Aisha (Everglow), Yujin (IVE), Chan (Stray Kids), Jungwon (Enhypen), Jeongyeon (Twice), Mimi (Oh My Girl), Mia (Everglow) and Jaehyun (NCT).
~Boyfriend~ Hoshi (Seventeen)
Now this is honestly a match made in heaven, even Hoshi knew it. You know the feeling you get when you look at someone for the first time? The feeling where you feel like you’re breath is getting caught in your throat and your heart starts to chase its own custom rhythm? That’s how Hoshi felt when he first met you, it was honestly such a pure feeling to him. Hoshi is very in tune with his emotions and he wears his heart on his sleeve, so feeling such emotions was inevitable for him to feel at some stage of his life. But he didn’t expect to fall as hard as he did.
There is a very deep mutual respect and love for each other, I don’t like hitting people with soul mate terminology unless its true. And this is the case with you and Hoshi. Your relationship is the definition of a happy virus, so much hyperactive energy, puppy love, deep romance and general happiness. The way you met seemed to be already mapped out by fate years before you even got the opportunity to meet.
In true idol fashion the two of you met through a Music Bank collab. It was the ultimate fanservice having two main dancers on stage together, plus it was an easy choice which two idols to have perform considering your energy and love for performing seems to rival his. You are both just energetic, loveable stars in your own right. What people didn’t expect was for the two of you to hang on to each other for a very long time after.
It wasn’t even like you knew you would date, it started with a really strong friendship. But the entire time you both knew that you were starting to really like being in each others lives. Before you were an item Hoshi would use whatever excuse he had to get you to be a guest on his tiktoks. He would easily take you dancing to Cheers with him over the other guys.
I know this just sounds like an overdose of fluff but it really is! You just understand each other, so your love story is nowhere as complex as others. But that doesn’t make it boring either. It’s actually so cool that love was more simple for the two of you.
Now I didn’t go into how he confessed, because really he just asked you out on the spot one day. But what I will talk about is the fact that your relationship went public very quickly. You weren’t irresponsible or clumsy, maybe slightly but both you and Hoshi made the decision that you were both comfortable with a public relationship. Hoshi just really didn’t want to hide the fact that you were the source of his happiness and that you were a huge motivation for him to be the best person he could be. Hoshi is just proud of you 24/7 and he wanted to show it off.
The news that broke out was both expected and unexpected, like they could see the two of you making heart eyes but then it’s still a “Oh shit, this is real?!?” moment. But Hoshi isn’t a good actor so by the way he was acting, it was clear he was just some guy super in love with his idol girlfriend. You really are such a good pairing, practically a match made in heaven, the amount of love you receive as a couple is so overwhelming, but we can’t help but just stan this extraordinarily amazing couple.
~Crushing on You~ Sanha (Astro)
Now Sanha is actually very private about this, to a shocking extent. While the other idols listed below are open and have admitted that they admire you in some way or another, Sanha didn’t budge. Which is crazy considering he likes you the most out of all them, he is just secretive about it.
It’s a very boyish love, that’s the only way I can describe it. He views you as if you are on your own pedestal above him where he can just admire everything you’ve worked towards. He is very intrigued by your work ethic, but it also goes deeper than that. It goes past admiration or idolising you, it’s like how you know someone isn’t going to be with you but you just really have a lot of love and respect because while you don’t have a relationship with them you are still in love with the traits that they possess.
Sanha has crushed on people without having met them in person but what really confirmed his feelings for you was the fact that he had met you in passing a few times ad even then you never looked down on him despite your successes, it was that gentle side of you, the part that never fails to lift others up, that confirmed how he felt.
His crush on you will most likely stay a secretive crush, and he is happy with that. In his own little Sanha world you brought him happiness by just being an idol and doing what you do. So in his heart he will always list you as his ideal type, even as he gets older he just knows that you made him feel seen when you were around him and that meant the world to him. So unlike many others he isn’t possessive, he is actually completely content with you being in a public relationship with Hoshi because he sees it that you and your personality is making Hoshi happy too, just like how your interactions made him feel happy.
He’s a very easy crush in the sense that he will crush on you from afar without ever feeling hurt or upset by your dating life or by what you want to do. He just likes you for you.
~Other Idols Crushing on You~ Jisung (Stray Kids), Cya (Onewe), O.de (Xdinary Heroes), Baekhyun (Exo) and Hyunsuk (Treasure)
~Extra Info~
You are one of the fondly remembered idols who participated in Pops in Seoul, you were actually very good at teaching people how to dance, a given since you basically did the same thing during your trainee days
~Scandal~ You weren’t ever in a full blown scandal, but there was a moment where you got unneccessary hate because you were comfortable and doing your thing on stage and netizens claimed you were overdancing and trying to steal the show.
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