#but its 67% off ... only 13 ....

[justewil]

apollo justice trilogy is on sale ... hmm ... (guy who bought the turnabout collection a year ago and has only played aa1 so far)

[probablydinosaurs]

five joking about his life or throwing it in their faces makes the siblings uneasy. they cant FATHOM it and it hurts. tbh i feel once they aren't all in such danger and ignoring his warnings and ring leader like behavior , they would slowly start spoiling him a bit. he wouldn't notice at all at first but over time, he gets a deep sense that everyone pities him but he cant place it. he'd start denying any hand outs or good will bc he doesn't want to be seen as a headcase that needs coddling. and i think different siblings are in different camps if u put "baby" and "old man" on a sliding scale. none of these are like extreme stances, more just the vibes they feel from five.

Luther: old man 80% bc hes the only one that see's five's "older" self and can 100% say. same guy no changes. mentally unsound…. but like five stated in that whole fiasco, Luther has daddy issues and cant like. see that old man in such a young man. Luther has 1 half a brain cell. his need to nod and agree to every old man he listens to illnesses wont allow it. so he weirdly flip flops. he also develops the habit of trying to pick five up to calm him down, witch ends very poorly each time.

Diego: protective brother energy. cant fathom his brother got THAT much trauma in him. and is older then him. 13 years of being all the same age. 13 years of sharing the same birthday. and now well everyone ages up together, five is in his own corner being like 67 well the rest are like mm idk math 40 something. Diego just cant…think that far. denial. every time he thinks he's used to this old man or starts seeing him as the same age as everyone, five info dumps about the inner workings of a specific gun or the how good the wine in the celler will be 37 years exactly from now and to wait…Diego just mentally reboots.

Allison: baby camp. didn't take him very seriously back in the day either bc his ego is the size of a watermelon. and oh look the lil guy thinks bc he has more life behind him then us, he thinks he's the smartest one here. yeah right. she makes him his coffee when he wakes up or folds his Landry bc she needs to do hers and he forgot to take his out. five just thinks shes being passive aggressive but its more "if i don't then he might hurt himself or mumbling to himself about how forgetful he has become and i do NOT want to here that right how. il just do it. " tough love babying. five sometimes lets her brush his hair when he's in a bad state of mind.

klaus: depends on the day. he is the one who tease him about his height the most. i think Klaus tries to pinch his cheeks at least once a day and nearly got a blade through his hand at attempt # 23. but he also is second one that weirdly respects him the most. complementing how happy he looks DUE to his retirement and not just in general. likes buying him the stuffiest old man clothes ever from off the road and down an alley thrift shops, thinking everyone would find them silly but five like. genuinely adores them and borderlines on feeling the want to hug him but neh. too stubborn. almost though. witch is rare. five will never admit that he thinks Klaus has a good fashion sense.

ben: the brother that ruffles his hair the most. the two that severed the family. they have a unspoken energy about them. you don't mention my death, i wont bring up your past deal. Ben doesn't really care anyway. on the "i got my brother back, that's all that matters." camp with viktor. fuels five's need to bicker on topics. their hard ass but still playful energy balances each other out. is the one that tells klaus that the clothes he picks out for five is too much and he will hate them but gets surprised every time five likes them. riiight right. he wouldn't have the tastes as the 13 year old i remember him as. he downs scotch like a mad lad. gotta remember that.

viktor: leader of the "he could have come back to us as an acorn like dad warned and id still keep him in my pocket." camp. just happy to have his favorite sibling back. though they admit five also being the most open with him makes him uneasy. he wants to listen about the past 45 years but it can be very existential for viktor. five understands and lets him breath if its too much. (stealing this from this post) i feel like five owns and somehow still has on him a very worn and well loved copy of viktor's book. with notes and highlights scribbled in them. the cover fell off and five sewn it back on then poorly laminated it with the commission's laminating machine . viktor would cry if he saw it. full blown meltdown together.

[svt-rosalie]

. . . ♡ MAKNAE ! ? 🪽 LINE ★ ﾟ๑

ׁ ׅ ୨ ❪ relationships! ❫ ୧ ⊹ ࣪

© 2023 , svt-rosalie rosalie masterlist!

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ POPULARITY — 51%

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ SHIP NAME — dokyeom + jihye ❪ DOKHYE ❫

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ DESCRIPTION — he’s always dotting on rosie and making sure everything is okay! he’s a very protective older brother.

he holds her hand to help her walk down the stage at concerts and events, he makes sure to help cover rosie if she’s wearing a dress and getting out of a car, he’ll push the small strands of hair that are getting into her eyes — the man even helps her wash her hair and wipe off her makeup after long days knowing she would rather fall right asleep and worry about the consequences of wearing makeup to bed later.

dokyeom was always protective of jihye ever since she met him and nothing about it is going to change. everytime he looks at rosie, he doesn’t the 23 year old, he sees the cute little 13 year old who accidentally spoke in french because she was too excited! yes, he obviously knows she has her own life and can do as she pleases but it’s the little things that he makes sure she knows she can fall back on dokyeom for!

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ POPULARITY — 49%

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ SHIP NAME — mingyu + jihye ❪ GYUJI ❫

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ DESCRIPTION — now, these two didn’t get along that well in the very beginning and even for the first almost year which is funny to think about.

there wasn’t really a reason for them to dislike each other, it was purely on the fact that they were so similar personality wise that they just clashed. everything thing they did was just a reason to say “mingyu oppa stop being so loud, your voice feels like it’s echoing in my head!” or “jihye you’re being annoying, leave me alone”. to be clear, they never got into physical or screaming fights — but they definitely could get a little heated and knew how to hit each others nerves.

this went on to about a year deep into debuting until seungcheol stuffed them in a room and locked the door to talk it out. they realized that night they were so alike and had the same interest with certain things that they were like two positives of a magnetic! at this point in time they are extremely close and they love each other dearly, honestly bestie for the restie.

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ POPULARITY — 67%

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ SHIP NAME — minghao + jihye ❪ JIHAO ❫

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ DESCRIPTION — minghao is the only one who will actually scold jihye but apologizes right after and cuddles her to death.

minghao’s always hyping up our precious flower (as he should) and it often embarrasses her (like a father that purposefully embarrasses their daughter out in public). “ah, she’s so cute!” “rosie posie, the prettiest flower in the field!” “how did we get so lucky to have you in our team.” its a constant thing and don’t get her wrong she loves it but he’ll do it in the most random places like whilst their at restaurants and it’s so loud too.

despite all of that, jihye has a special place in minghao’s heart. she’s like a the rainbow that comes after the rain and no matter how protective or “embarrassing” minghao is for jihye, she knows she would miss it once it’s gone. jihye was never one to want to regret things and she didn’t want to regret taking the love minghao gives for granted.

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ POPULARITY — 74%

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ SHIP NAME — seungkwan + jihye ❪ KWANHYE ❫

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ DESCRIPTION — these two are always taking care of each other. mostly jihye taking care of seungkwan and accidentally getting called noona because of it. “she takes care of me like a big sister, it was accidental!” half the time it’s not an accident, but you didn’t hear it from me.

the thing is seungkwan is always taking care of the members by making sure they are staying healthy, eating right and taking their vitamins as needed — but who does he have to fall back on when he forgets that he needs a helping hand? the answer is, jihye. she has this like 6th sense when it comes to the 98 liner. he’ll be in his room close to tears over something that’s been on his mind and here comes jihye with the worlds best cuddles and the most comforting words a person could hear. sometimes all you need is that one person and that one look to take all the stress away.

seungkwan loves jihye with all his heart and if and when seventeen ends, he knows that his friendship with jihye will never. there’s just something about these two that makes them both connect so well, it’s like twin flames.

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ POPULARITY — 47%

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ SHIP NAME — vernon + jihye ❪ JINON ❫

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ DESCRIPTION — the annoying older brother that jihye simply can not get rid of.

he will deliberately do things that he knows gets under her skin, drinking straight out of the milk carton (he looks her in the eye and smiles when he puts it back), laying on her bed with his outside clothes on (he does this when she’s already on the bed and lays directly on top of her too), he’ll even go as far as using her favorite and expensive shampoo and conditioner and tell her “oh yeah, jihye your out of hair wash might wanna get some more” — but there will always be a new bottles on her bed at the end of the day. he’s nice like that . . . sometimes!

now, vernon never does this to the point of making her uncomfortable or making or cry, that’s not the point and it’s a way he shows his love to her. jihye is another little sister to him and what better way to show affection to your sister by teasing her and pissing her off? jihye always gets him back though, oh you best believe! it’s constantly a thing between them so when they all switched dorms it was heaven sent for the other members.

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ POPULARITY — 98%

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ SHIP NAME — chan + jihye ❪ CHYE ❫

˳ ׄ ཐིiཋྀ ⟡ DESCRIPTION — her everything, her once in a lifetime best friend, the person she never wants to lose. dino, was the first person to speak to her when she arrived at pledis entertainment and he will never regret it.

the two became close immediately seeing as how close in age they are and everything they had in common. they went to school together — everyday walking the same path holding hands (jihye liked to run off when she saw something she liked), dino helped jihye with her homework (even though he didn’t understand it, with her being in advanced classes and such). they often think back to the time they stayed up at night when they were trainee’s and consoled each other and put a stop to each others worries for the future. dino made a secret promise to himself, if jihye didn’t debut with him in someway, shape, or form then he would back out and follow jihye wherever she went.

fans can see their love for each other all the time weather it be at concerts, through their phone screen, and even in photos. there is no jihye without dino and no dino with jihye, better get used to it because they aren’t going anywhere.

tag list — @sousydive

[catindabag]

TBOSAS on Crack! ✨essential information✨

⭐️❄️⭐️

FIRST off, in honor of the book and its movie release, TBOSAS on Crack is solely (just) created as a JOKE!Alternative Universe that focuses more on the 24 OG Mentors of the 10th Hunger Games. This includes the funny/romantic misunderstandings of Coriolanus Snow and Sejanus Plinth that gave everyone the impression that they were actually “secretly” dating, and are indeed boyfriends (until they honestly were).

In addition, this Crack!AU will tell you the compelling story of how a bunch of delinquents “accidentally” stopped the Hunger Games from continuing, just because of a certain Mentor’s ✨nepotism✨.

MORE or less, most of the characters in the book are the same when it comes to their personalities and backstories. Well, except for our Mentors. They’re a bunch of crackhead Capitol kids with too much fun and stress on their hands. They even almost made Dean Highbottom and Dr. Gaul quit their respective jobs.

ALSO, these young walking disasters are not “all there” in the head. Heck! Half of them went crazy years ago because of the infamous 2 year Capitol Siege by the rebels that almost starved them all to death. Just ask Coryo Snow and Persephone. But as for the other half, let’s just say that all they want to do is eat, drink, party, and ✨graduate✨.

Here is a quick character info: [Read Me]

Here are their visuals: [Read Me]

Here’s the Hunger Games Origin: [Read Me]

Here’s their playlist: [Read Me]

Here are their ✨Code Names✨: [Read Me]

And here’s Dean Highbottom’s take: [Read Me]

Here’s that Epic The Musical Post: [Read Me]

Here’s the fate of District 13: [Read Me]

PS: For sanity’s sake, no Mentor or Tribute will be dying in this Crack!AU. No one gets killed! Bombs will still explode inside the Capitol Arena, but our crazy kids will wear the thickest plot armor EVER, just because I’m their only sponsor!🤣

Read the Cracks here: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78,

The cracks are not in chronological order, but someday they will. . .

MOREOVER, this Crack!AU includes the following:

The accidental birth of ✨Snowjanus✨!😘

Also known as Corjanus, SnowPlinth, CabbageBread, The Grandma’am golden ticket to a rich life, and Strabo’s not so secret plan to rule all of Panem through his only son’s marriage to Crassus Snow’s boy.

Coryo Snow malfunctioning for the hundredth time because of how forward and shamelessly romantic Sejanus Plinth is.

“Fine! I’ll marry into money! I’m sick of eating cabbages anyway!”

“Stop throwing bread to the dead, Sejanus Plinth! Throw it to the living!”

The Mentors (intentionally) delaying the Hunger Games from officially starting because of their nonstop shenanigans with their Tributes (much to Dr. Gaul and her Gamemaker’s frustration).🤣

The Tributes slowly accepting (and sometimes rejecting) the fact that their Mentors are just a bunch of “dramatic nepotistic crazy clowns” who refuse to learn basic social cues.

The 10th Hunger Games being officially postponed (over and over again) because of Felix Ravinstill’s ✨nepotism✨ working overtime.😌💅

In truth, the Gamemakers were “forced” to stop the countdown (over and over again) because half of the Mentors illegally barged into the control room without Dr. Gaul’s permission. Afterwards, Felix just used the excuse of “My granduncle is the President of Panem, I can do whatever I want” card to postpone the games.

Lucy Gray ignoring the personal space of her fellow annoyed Tributes (and everyone she meets), just because she’s “Covey” and quirky.

The poor underpaid Capitol Peacekeepers wanting a salary increase, vacation, and promotion because they have been dealing with the Mentors’ extra curricular criminal activities for far too long.

All the Mentors (excluding Livia and Arachne) being genuine ✨Besties✨ to each other since their grade school days.

Livia Cardew only calls her classmates either witches or idiots.

Festus Creed being the real ✨Dumpster Diving Capitol Rat King✨ and the best free cheesecake coupon hoarder of the century.

“Dumpster Diving for free food coupons is a common school activity, officer!”

The Academy? More like ✨The Academy of Arts✨💅.

Everyone wanting to secretly major in ✨Theatre & Drama✨.

Crazy but rich AF Sejanus Plinth and his unhealthy obsession of being Coryo Snow’s beloved boyfriend, fiancé, sugar daddy, baby daddy, and future husband.

Ma Plinth slowly becoming the food benefactor of the Mentors. #feedmeMa

Coriolanus Snow and Lucy Gray being the best of friends who love to sh*t talk about their boyfriends every time they meet.

Seriously, Coryo and Lucy Gray are just friends here. Everyone knows that crazy Sejanus Plinth will strangle anyone who tries to flirt with his gorgeous Snow Bae sugar baby fiancé.

Lucy Gray genuinely liking the Mentors for their chaotic ✨dramatic✨ personalities.

Sejanus Plinth shamelessly calling his darling Coryo “Babe, My love, Snow Angel, Snow Bae, Snowy, Snow Baby, Sweetheart” in front of everyone and their dogs.

The Mentors randomly coming up to Lucy Gray and asking her to sing banned songs from the early 2000s.

Strabo Plinth’s unhealthy obsession with the Snow family. Apparently, he and the ever gorgeous Crassus Snow were very close “friends” and the best “roommates” back in their military days. They were busy “stargazing” and playing with their rifles all night if you know what I mean.😏

The Grandma’am and Strabo Plinth being the true evil geniuses of the Capitol.😈

Strabo Plinth insisting Coryo to marry into his family and change their surnames to ✨The Great Plinth-Snow Dynasty✨, just because it sounds more powerful.

Coryo Snow accidentally convincing his beloved sugar daddy boyfriend (Crazy Sejanus Plinth) to become the future ✨President of Panem✨ (after Felix).

Tigris and The Grandma’am selling Coryo’s hand in marriage to the Plinth family. They genuinely believe that old man Strabo Plinth will lower the food prices if Sejanus marries Coryo for the sake of Panem.

Tigris Snow finally quitting her job (she got fired for being a weird cheese addict) and happy dancing for a whole week when she heard that her sweet little Coryo will marry into the Plinth family fortune.

Tigris, the Grandma’am, and Ma Plinth planning the ultimate ✨Snowjanus Royal Wedding of The Century✨.

The Grandma’am and evil Strabo Plinth scheming together to rule Panem and its people through ✨The Great SnowPlinth Union✨.

Ma Plinth wanting at least 5 beautiful grandchildren out of The Great SnowPlinth Union, while Strabo and the Grandma’am demanded 2 dozen (and more). #24&More

Lysistrata Vickers being the founder and President of the Capitol’s SnowPlinth/Snowjanus Official Fan Club.

Lucy Gray supporting and promising Coryo Snow that she and her Covey will sing the best banned love songs at his wedding.

Reaper Ash being labeled as the “weird one” by his fellow crazy Tributes.

Treech and Vipsania Sickle being the best gym bros for some unknown reason.

Marcus trying (and failing) to ignore the annoying existence of Sejanus Plinth.

Lysistrata Vickers having dibs as Coryo’s official ✨Maid of Honor✨. Apparently, poor cheese addict Tigris Snow was tragically outvoted by the very influential and powerful SnowPlinth/Snowjanus Fan Club members out of jealousy.🥲

Festus Creed and Tigris Snow fighting for the position of ✨Best Man✨ through an epic ✨Dance-off Battle✨💃🕺.

Apollo Ring being forced to be Coryo’s ring bearer because of his surname. Honestly, Gaius Breen and Androcles Anderson just peer pressured him for fun.

Livia Cardew planning to crash Coryo’s wedding for the expensive wine.

The Mentors and Tributes avoiding the “Arena Bomb Explosion Incident” because of Palmyra Monty’s dangerous existence.

Androcles Anderson being a proud professional kleptomaniac.

Lucky Flickerman wanting to quit his job. Apparently, the self proclaimed magic man was extremely unprepared to face and deal with the Mentors’ collective stupidity.😭

The Gamemakers forgetting to edit out Sejanus Plinth’s little arena stunt.

“Marcus was just sleeping, Sejanus! He’s still alive, you idiot Plinth! We freaking postponed the games!”

“For the last time! Don’t kiss Coriolanus Xanthos Snow on LIVE TV! There are freaking kids and dogs watching!”

Coryo and Sejanus shamelessly kissing, hugging, and being dramatic AF inside the Capitol Arena, while poor Marcus and the others are left sitting on the stands annoyed and confused AF.

Dean Casca Highbottom intentionally calling poor Coryo “Crassus Xanthos Snow” out of spite and out of regret (and because he’s still madly and deeply in love with the ever gorgeous Crassus Snow).

Drunk Highbottom living and swimming in denial since the infamous ✨#Crasca4Ever! University Breakup✨.😔

Coryo Snow successfully convincing a drunk Highbottom not to expel him by pretending to be Crassus Snow. He later regrets doing it.

Drunk!Casca not being able to correctly pronounce half all of his students’ names.

Festus Creed and Androcles Anderson receiving a lot of demerits and expulsion letters from the Dean. However, they still go to school and join their class discussions like nothing happened.

Casca Highbottom banning the Mentors from attending ✨The Academy’s Annual Students Teachers Meeting✨ (forever) because of the infamous Heavensbee Hall Flooding Incident.

Coryo Snow secretly trading his cabbages for banned music albums at the Capitol Black Market.

The banned song “Heaven Is A Place On Earth” accidentally playing on repeat inside the Capitol Arena because Felix Ravinstill forgot to detach his phone from Dr. Gaul’s master speaker.

“Snow On The Beach” stealing the top spot on the Capitol Billboard Hot 100 because of Coryo Snow and Lucy Gray’s final performance inside the Capitol Arena.

The Mentors trolling Lucky Flickerman and Lepidus Malmsey for the hundredth time.

Hilarius Heavensbee secretly collects movie records from the early 2000s. His favorite banned film is ✨Legally Blonde✨.

Io Jasper and Urban Canville being a bunch of shameless nerds who can’t properly communicate with each other.

Professor Sickle trying to convince Drunk!Casca Highbottom to give her a raise and promotion for tolerating the Mentors’ shenanigans and stupidity.

Crazy Palmyra Monty forever mentally and emotionally scarring her classmates (especially Florus Friend) with her homemade poisonous snacks.

Florus Friend fearing and avoiding Palmyra Monty’s accursed deadly bread rolls and expired sandwiches.

Felix Ravinstill being a genuine good friend and great Class President to everyone.

Dennis Fling asking poor sensitive Felix to beg for some illegal ✨Miracle Pills✨ from Lysistrata to cure Hy and Dill’s respiratory related illnesses.

Everyone knows that Persephone Price willingly ate that infamous “Maid Stew” that her father made for them to survive.

Festus Creed’s ✨PerseFest✨ agenda.

Dairy Heiress Domitia Whimsiwick fawning over Tanner’s skills and biceps.

Coral perfecting her somersault to impress the Capitol crowd and her idiot Mentor.

The Mentors pretending to be stupid whenever they attend Dr. Gaul’s class.

Dr. Gaul giving up on grooming poor Coryo Snow to become her successor because she realized that his brain doesn’t work properly whenever he’s with Sejanus.

Poor homeless Hilarius Heavensbee getting disowned and kicked out of the ✨Queen Bee Mansion✨ by his evil weirdo parents for being a loser nuisance towards his smarter and perfect younger brother.

Livia and Arachne convincing themselves that Casca Highbottom is actually Coryo Snow’s true sugar daddy.

Meanwhile, Florus Friend thinks Strabo Plinth is the real sugar daddy of poor Coryo Snow and homeless Hilarius Heavensbee.

Dr. Gaul openly wanting to strangle the Mentors for acting being stupid.

Urban Canville’s secret mission to strangle Lucky Flickerman and his annoying bird.

Felix Ravinstill being the favorite darling grandnephew son of President Gran Gran.

Festus winning the position of ✨Class Representative✨. Apparently, Creed only won because Sejanus “accidentally” locked Urban Canville inside a bathroom stall.

Persephone Price and Mizzen being the best pizza partners in crime. Somebody, these two idiots will rule all of Panem with their ruthless ✨Pizza Palace Empire✨.

Drunk!Coryo genuinely believes that Felix Ravinstill is the current President of Panem.

Drunk!Sejanus, Drunk!Coryo, Drunk!Festus, and Drunk!Lysistrata acting like shameless fools in front of their Tributes. The poor and underpaid Peacekeepers were not amused.

Festus Creed and Sejanus Plinth stripping on broad daylight because of the summer heat.

Reaper Ash praying for some normalcy and mental peace every day.

Jessup and Sheaf talking and singing with the Capitol’s “sacred” rabid raccoons and wild squirrels in order to stay sane.

Mizzen being a terrible little gremlin.

The Mentors trying to recreate The Hunger Games until ✨Panemvision✨ was born.

Livia’s own version of The Hungers Games is basically ✨Love Island✨ on crack and steroids.

Because of the awful “Love Island” idea, the rest of the Mentors had to write a serious 20 page essay on why the Hunger Games should be recreated/revamped into a true reality TV show with a “no killing, no gore, no cannibalism” policy.

The Mentors trying to convince the School Board Members, the Government Officials, and crazy President Ravinstill to change the 10th Hunger Games into a non-deadly talent show to increase viewership and sponsors.

Moreover, Coryo strongly defended the proposal by having Lucy Gray successfully sing in front of a live audience (again) on TV. Billy Taupe was the only one who got offended (again).

Meanwhile, the rest of the Mentors also convinced their Tributes to show off their talents that same day. That was Reaper’s 2nd worst day of the week.😂

Dean Highbottom only supported the proposal because it reminded him of his wild karaoke clubbing days with his drop dead gorgeous lover. You know who it was.😏 #Crasca4Ever #crassusmylove #SnowBottom

Clemensia Dovecote also backs their weird essays by simply stating that killing children will only make the Districts hate the Capitol more. However, if they provide “real entertainment” without the violence, then the Districts might warm up to them.

In addition, Sejanus proposed that the winner of the contest will be made a ✨STAR of PANEM✨! 🤩

And as the ✨Star of Panem✨, he/she will be given monetary support and a lifetime supply of cabbages and lima beans by the Capitol.

Meanwhile, the losers will only get 10 boxes of pizza, 2 gallons of orange soda, one body bag of sandwiches (made by Ma Plinth) as a reward for “willingly” participating.

Juno Phipps then added a “rule” stating that no Tribute shall be punished (or killed) because the losers must live and remember their humiliation on television for the rest of their lives.😈

Coryo and Clemmie also proposed that each Tribute must have a Prep Team and Stylist to make them presentable for Lucky Flickerman’s Late Night Show with Jubilee.

Finally, Felix Ravinstill and Dennis Fling closed their arguments by stating: “That being forced to sing and perform ON STAGE and on LIVE TV, which could be replayed over and over again, even after death, especially for Tributes who couldn’t save their own pride and dignity for all of Panem to remember, is the worst punishment one could freely give to one’s enemy. They won’t even be allowed to forget how they had wronged you.”

After hearing the Mentors’ closing argument, Dr. Gaul was ready to end it all and commit bloody murder in front of everyone.😡🔪

But after some deliberation, President Ravinstill (and his puppies) approved the Mentors’ proposal and changed the Hungers Games into the ✨HGASC✨ (Hunger Games: Annual Singing Contest).

However, the Grandma’am and Strabo Plinth insisted that they should just officially call it ✨PANEMVISION✨.

Meanwhile, Dr. Gaul tried to persuade President Ravinstill (again) to reconsider the Mentors’ stupid proposals.

However, she was outvoted by both the School Board Committee and the Capitol’s highest ranking government officials, just because everyone (but her) wanted to see what “true entertainment” really looks like on screen.

Livia Cardew even defended everyone’s ideas nonstop because, according to her, there was a lack of spicy entertainment in the Capitol. Damn the rules! This is the Capitol! We want ✨Love Island✨ type of dramas! Where are the ✨Real Housewives of Corso✨?! F*ck the Hunger Games! Give us the 90 Day Fiancé from the Districts!

And that’s how the Mentors “accidentally” ended the Hunger Games and gave birth to the most popular and craziest reality TV show in the weird history of Panem.

As for every Quarter Quell, let’s just say, it’s gonna be a true ✨SHOW STOPPER✨!

The first ✨HGASC/PANEMVISION✨ Quarter Quell will have the Mentors reap kids from both Capitol and District. Afterwards, one District Tribute will be paired with one Capitol Tribute to perform a special duet act (whether they like it or not).

[vinylshifting]

ANSWERING THESE 70 QUESTIONS

(but my dr self!)

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

Sure, they dont really care ehat i do so thats nice

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

my girlfrienddd

03: Do you regret anything?

Moving to america wahh (even though it wasnt my choice)

04: Are you insecure?

not really

05: What is your relationship status?

taken <33

06: How do you want to die?

eithee in a super cool awesome way or at my own hands /hj

07: What did you last eat?

cant remember

08: Played any sports?

i like to play hockey sometimes

09: Do you bite your nails?

nope

10: When was your last physical fight?

cant remember

11: Do you like someone?

My girlfrienndd

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

Yep

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

Annoying ppl at school

14: Do you miss someone?

Not really tbh

15: Have any pets?

yes! my cat elivera

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

Tired

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

Wouldnt you like to know

18: Are you scared of spiders?

Nope

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

Maybe

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

What does that even mean bruh

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

sleep and play elden rings

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

NO

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

snake bites would be cool

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

Anything science or music

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

nope, but maybe my friends from my hometown when i was little

26: What are you craving right now?

Some zaxbys

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

never

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

Nope, my girlfriend is my first (and only) relationship

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

i dont think so

30: What’s irritating you right now?

School 100%

31: Does somebody love you?

My girlfriend

32: What is your favourite color?

Grey, any shade of grey

33: Do you have trust issues?

A tiny bit

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

Cant remember

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

My online friend

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

Sometimes

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

Forget

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

I cherish every year

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

13??? maybe 14

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

No, and never plan to

51: Favourite food?

SOUP 🔥🔥 any kind i love soup

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

Yes

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

Probably jerk off scroll instagram reels

54: Is cheating ever okay?

No never

55: Are you mean?

I wouldnt say i am

56: How many people have you fist fought?

Idfk

57: Do you believe in true love?

Yes

58: Favourite weather?

RAIN, or cloudy days. i like the cold

59: Do you like the snow?

yes 100%

60: Do you wanna get married?

To my girlfriend yes

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

Only when its my girlfriend

62: What makes you happy?

My friends, Alcohol, My girlfriend

63: Would you change your name?

No

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

Nope

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Pepper spray, im locked in with my girl

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

Not really

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

My mom

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

My girlfriend

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

Yes

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

My girlfriend or my friends

(feel free to take this idea too!!)

[100gayicons]

J. Warren Kerrigan (Jack to his friends) was a popular actor in the early years of silent film. He made as many as 300 movies and shorts between 1910 and 1924.

In 1917, a fan magazines voted Kerrigan the most popular actor. The press dubbed him “The Great God Kerrigan”.

Contrary to Kerrigan on screen persona as a “fast-shooting, buckskin-wearing roughneck”, he had a reputation for being effeminate. Allan Dwan, a director, would harass him on the set. In 1912, while shooting the short “The Poisoned Flume”, Dwan held Kerrigan’s head underwater for the amusement of the crew, forcing the star struggled to break free.

Kerrigan got his revenge. By the next year his star power had risen. He threatened the studio that he would go on strike if they didn’t fire Dwan. Kerrigan got his way.

Kerrigan lived with his mother. When asked by reporters, he said he liked women best when "they leave me alone." As long as he made the studio money, in those early days of Hollywood, they didn’t care. And Kerrigan made them plenty of money.

In 1917 Kerrigan used some of his wealth to build a large house on Cahuenga Blvd, near the Hollywood Bowl. He lived there with his mother. Two years later he met James Vincent, a "juvenile" actor, on the set of “Out of Court”. Vincent, 18 years younger than Kerrigan, was invited to move into the house on Cahuenga. Later Vincent would be referred to as Kerrigan’s secretary or gardner.

In 1922, Hollywood was rocked by off-screen scandals involving movie stars, including Roscoe Arbuckle’s trial for murder of a starlet. The studios hired Will Hays, a Republican politician and Presbyterian minister, to help improve Hollywood’s image with both the public, but perhaps more importantly, Congress.

In 1924, Hayes recommended his "Formula" that would severely control the content of the movies. Plus the studios would be mandated to control the behavior of its stars.

Perhaps it’s no coincidence that Kerrigan decided to retire from acting in 1924. But the next year, he continued to assert his masculinity, by purchasing an ad in Motion Picture Magazine:

“From the time I was 13, I had the support of a family on my hands,  Later, my mother and I were so very close that I didn't feel the need of any other companion.  It is only since I have been alone that I have had time and opportunity to think of marriage and - so far - I haven't found any girl who would think about it with me! But I will fool 'em!  I'm going to catch one, one of these days --- you'll see! J. Warren Kerrigan”

Kerrigan and Vincent would continue to live together at the house on Cahuenga Boulevard. Kerrigan died in 1947 from pneumonia at the age of 67. Sadly, nine months later Vincent took his own life. They had been together for 28 years.

[cruger2984]

THE DESCRIPTION OF SAINT FRANCES XAVIER CABRINI The Patron of Immigrants Feast Day: November 13

Before she became the patron of immigrants, she was born Maria Francesca Cabrini on July 15, 1850, in Sant'Angelo Lodigiano, in the Lombard Province of Lodi, then part of the Austrian Empire. She was the youngest of the thirteen children of farmers Agostino Cabrini and Stella Oldini. Only four of the thirteen survived beyond adolescence.

Born two months early, Maria was small and weak as a child and remained in delicate health throughout her life. During her childhood, she visited an uncle, Don Luigi Oldini of Livagra, a priest who lived beside a swift canal. While there, she made little boats of paper, dropped violets in them, called the flowers 'missionaries', and launched them to sail off to India and China. Francesca attended a school run by the Daughters of the Sacred Heart of Jesus at thirteen, then she graduated cum laude with a teaching degree five years later.

After her parents died in 1870, she applied for admission to the Daughters of the Sacred Heart at Arluno. These sisters were her former teachers, but reluctantly, they told her she was too frail for their life.

Cabrini took religious vows in 1877 and added Xavier (Saverio) to her name to honor the Jesuit saint, St. Francis Xavier, the patron saint of missionary service. She had planned, like Francis Xavier, to be a missionary in the Far East.

In November 1880, Cabrini and seven other women who had taken religious vows with her founded the Missionary Sisters of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. The sisters took in orphans and foundlings, opened a day school to help pay expenses, started classes in needlework and sold their fine embroidery to earn a little more money. The institute established seven homes and a free school and nursery in its first five years. Its good works brought Cabrini to the attention of Giovanni Scalabrini, Bishop of Piacenza, and of Pope Leo XIII.

In September 1887, Cabrini went to seek the pope's approval to establish missions in China. Instead, he urged that she go to the United States to help the Italian immigrants who were flooding to that nation, mostly in great poverty. 'Not to the East, but to the West' was his advice.

Along with six other sisters, Cabrini left for the United States, arriving in New York City on March 31, 1889. While in New York, she encountered disappointment and difficulties. Michael Corrigan, the third archbishop of New York, who was not immediately supportive, found them housing at the convent of the Sisters of Charity. She obtained the archbishop's permission to found the Sacred Heart Orphan Asylum in rural West Park, New York, later renamed Saint Cabrini Home. She organized catechism and education classes for the Italian immigrants and provided for many orphans' needs. She established schools and orphanages despite tremendous odds. She was as resourceful as she was prayerful, finding people who would donate what she needed in money, time, labor, and support. Cabrini was naturalized as a United States citizen in 1909.

While preparing Christmas candy for local children, Cabrini died on December 22, 1917 at the age of 67 due to malaria in Columbus Hospital in Chicago, Illinois. Her body was initially interred at what became Saint Cabrini Home, the orphanage she founded in West Park, Ulster County, New York. She was beatified on November 13, 1938, by Pope Pius XI, and canonized on July 7, 1946, by Pope Pius XII, a year after World War II ended. In 1950, Pope Pius XII named Frances Xavier Cabrini as the patron saint of immigrants, recognizing her efforts on their behalf across the Americas in schools, orphanages, hospitals, and prisons.

[sunspray-peak]

Ch. 67: Winter Star

THURSDAY - WINTER 25

“Rise and shine, Alexander, it’s Winter Star!” 

Achilles could’ve been banging pots and pans, and the aforementioned Alexander still likely would’ve only rolled over with a snore if the former hadn’t also jabbed him hard in forehead. In between a sputter and a yawn, Alex managed to murmur, “Is it Winter Star already?”

“Mmhm.” Achilles took advantage of Alex’s wide-reaching stretch to duck under his arms and lay himself underneath. “And look, it’s snowing, baby—well, I guess you can’t look, the curtains are closed…”

 Alex yawned again. “Never expected you to get excited over snow…” He gently swatted Voltaire, who had also joined the party, aside and pulled up the bed covers. 

“Oh, I still hate it, but it’s not too bad, and I’ve always wanted a White Winter Star. In Monstera, our Winter Stars are usually dry and… vaguely tannish.” 

“Yup, yup, makes sense…” Another yawn. “Geez, you’re already dressed?” Still bleary-eyed, Alex had pawed at Achilles’ chest only to encounter the soft knit of a wool sweater.

“It’s 9am.”

“Oh heck, seriously? Why didn’t you wake me up?” 

“Because it’s Winter Star! It’s your day off, you deserve to sleep in! Don’t worry, I made breakfast!” 

“I’ve never seen you so excited for a festival…” Yet another yawn. Clearly Alex hadn’t slept well—dark dreams, perhaps?—but his assessment was nevertheless fair. Winter Star had always been Achilles’ favorite holiday 

Back in Monstera, his parents had thrown a lavish, annual Winter Star party. It’d always been the talk of the town; there was live music and festive costumes and the most delicious food—roast beef and sweet potatoes and deviled eggs and lamb; the list went on and on. 

And Perry and Apolline had always made sure to order Achilles’ favorite—a chocolate cranberry pavlova. Oh, just thinking about it now made his mouth water… as Alex knew, he wasn’t usually a chocolate person, but the pastry chef for the Robinsons’ go-to caterer could not be beat. The pavlovas from the bakeries in Hyacinthia had never been the same, but Gus had promised him he’d do his best… 

Alex, however, clearly did not seem to share his enthusiasm for the holiday.

The two had been grabbing a drink with Emily and Haley the night before, and when they had left the saloon, Pelican Town was in the midst of its transformation for the festival. Multiple red carpets had been rolled out in the square encircling the massive Tree of the Winter Star. 

It had to have been nearly 50 feet tall, a real hefty pine tree Lewis had made sure to inform them had been sourced “right from our neighboring community in Sunspray!” And they had left the Stardrop just in time to see Willy flick on the lights, tiny silver bulbs illuminating baubles of gold and blue and red. And at the very top—a star that shimmered like a jewel under the moonlight. 

Privately, Achilles thought his parents’ tree was prettier, but even so, he had marveled at the towering sight. To his surprise, however, Alex had only made an uncharacteristic little “Hmph,” and hadn’t stopped to give it more than a second’s glance as they made their way back to Strawberry Farms. 

He could have chalked it up to familiarity—after all, Alex had lived in Stardew for nearly 13 years now, the tree wasn’t anything new to him—but in the carols Willy had begun to bellow, Achilles was reminded of Spirit’s Eve, and the memory to which he had borne witness.  

I think this was the first time I realized my dad wasn’t a good man. 

Even now, there was a heaviness to the way Alex was holding the glass of water Achilles had brought him. But perhaps he could help Alex create some new memories for the holiday.

God, you’re giving yourself too much credit, you narcissist… 

But Winter Star had always been only the most joyous of affairs in the Desrosiers-Robinson household. The parties were fun, but what Achilles had always loved most about Winter Star was the time with loved ones. Cheesy, but true. He had numerous fond memories celebrating with his family— holiday sweaters, the traditional breakfast of gingerbread muffins and peppermint hot chocolate, and then the presents! It was always a full day, packed to the brim with activities, and though there was no party here (perhaps he’d throw one of his own next year), he wasn’t planning on slowing down just because he was in Stardew. 

Achilles scurried up from the bed to draw back the curtains and welcome in the white shaft of sunlight that broke immediately through the blinds. It cut through the room like a knife, illuminating one half of Alex’s face and setting the bit of gold in his emerald eyes aglow. And even with Alex frowning and squinting hard into the glare of the glass in his hand, Achilles couldn’t help but stare. 

With his nose scrunched, Alex tossed Achilles a perturbed look as he scooted himself up against the headboard. “What are you looking at me like that for?” 

“Come on, you should know that anytime I’m looking at you, I’m admiring that overwhelmingly beautiful face of yours, my beautiful, beautiful boy.” 

Alex cleared the phlegm from his throat and rubbed the sand from his eyes. “Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah. I mean just look at that nose. Your favorite part of your face!” 

“That is true, it is my favorite—oh, okay—you’re in a—extra good mood—”

Achilles had hopped gently back onto the bed—he was straddling him now, holding his face in both his hands before leaning forward to kiss the aforementioned nose. He had taken their conversation two nights previously to heart. It had hurt to learn Alex had been anxious, but Achilles was determined to make it up to him now. Alex had been right—Achilles wasn’t naturally a touchy person, but he’d promised himself he’d be more considerate now for Alex’s sake. 

“Do you want to know what my favorite part of your face is?”

Alex drummed his fingers along Achilles’ thighs and fought back another yawn. “Just dying to know.” 

“All of it.” 

“Ha ha, Ash.” Alex rolled his eyes, but the morning’s melancholy seemed to be melting slowly away under Achilles’ touch, for he was now smiling as he slid a hand under the back of Achilles’ sweater. “Real, uh, diplomatic an answer.” 

“See, I’m sure everybody else says your eyes, but since I’m just so incredibly unique and quirky, I decided I’d—” But he cut his rambling joke short after witnessing the wince that had flashed across Alex’s face for just a fraction of a second. “What, you don’t like your eyes?” 

“No, no…” Alex gave his head a little shake, ran a hand though his bed head.“I dunno. I just wish they weren’t my dad’s.” 

Oh. 

“Hmm. Let me get a better look.” Achilles had, of course, committed the whole spectrum of those iris’ shades to memory quite a long while ago, but he took his time as he cupped Alex’s chin and studied him closely with a sideways tilt of his head before concluding his examination with a smart pat on the shoulder. “Hmm. I say, Master Mullner, I’m no artist, but yours are quite different a shade. Much warmer—an earthier tint, if you will. Sure, they’re both green, but you wouldn’t call an avocado peel the same color as a lima bean, now would you? Leah would be outraged.” 

Then, he kissed him once atop each eyelid as Alex laughed. Achilles was being silly, that was obvious enough, but even so… 

“Thank you,” Alex murmured, burrowing his head under Achilles’ chin and hugging him close.

They sat like this for a minute or two. Under the sunlight, in the silence. Achilles could feel his breath, warm against his chest, slow and soft—in fact, he wondered whether Alex had fallen back asleep, until his voice rang out, small and slightly muffled against his sweater, 

“What are we, Ash?” 

Oh no. 

“Hmm?” 

Achilles had, of course, heard him the first time, but he was choosing to buy himself a minute or two to formulate his response. 

“I just… I mean, I guess I understand if you feel it’s too early to have this conversation, it’s just that after Tuesday, I guess, I was just wondering… I don’t know. It’s been a few weeks, now. What are we?” 

This is so unfair. 

Achilles leaned back to better facilitate eye contact and almost immediately regretted it; those puppy-dog eyes—it was too much. “Well, what do you want us to be?” 

“I asked you the question first.” 

“You actually asked a different question, technically—”

“Achilles…” 

Your nose is twitching. Your nose is twitching! Drag it out, at least until you can get to the kitchen—

“We’re dating. Do you want more?” 

Alex bit his lip. “Do you want more?” 

“I asked you the question first.” 

“Okay, okay, okay—”

Just kidding, don’t drag it out, can’t you see how stressed he is! Ugh, forget about it. Just do it. 

Achilles sat backwards onto the heels of his feet and pinched his nose. “I had a whole thing planned out, you know. For Saturday. A beautiful bouquet of flowers, a nice speech, a wonderfully romantic walk along the boardwalk. It was going to be a whole thing, but I guess you’ll never see it now.” He sighed and tapped Alex’s forehead. “I want you to be my boyfriend, Alexander Joshua Mullner. How about that? Would you like to be my boyfriend, hmm?”

It was clearly not the response Alex had expected from the rate Achilles’ nose had been twitching—his lips parted in an ‘o,’ and it was several seconds before he managed to say, “Um. Oh. Yeah. I mean, sure. Yeah!” 

“Great.” 

A pause. Then both of them began to speak.

“I’m sorry, this would’ve been significantly less awkward on Saturday—”

“I’m sorry, I really futzed up your plan didn’t I—”

Achilles shrugged, smiling, though Voltaire seemed to give an emphatic “Mew.” 

“Nah, it’s okay, it wasn’t anything particularly fancy. The weather forecast says it’s supposed to be pretty warm, I thought perhaps we could have a picnic on the beach, we spent a lot of time there together this past year… Sit on the boardwalk where I, one could say, once regurgitated the contents of my alcohol-filled stomach with great gusto. You know. Very romantic.” 

“Oh, yeah, real romantic…” Alex chuckled and then looked back up at Achilles. “Well we can still have the picnic, can’t we? Like, do I at least still get the flowers?” 

“Absolutely not, you get nothing.”

“I get you.” 

The quip came quick, and Achilles couldn’t help but blush as Alex crawled forward to wrap his arms around his neck and kiss his cheek, whispering, “Happy Winter Star to me.” 

Oh hell, in the span of three minutes, he’d nearly forgotten it was Winter Star—there was a schedule to keep! Achilles jumped off the bed and hurled Alex a dark green sweater he’d purchased for him the week before. 

“Get dressed and brush your teeth. I baked some muffins and they taste best fresh.” He had scurried halfway to the kitchen when he remembered his promise and dashed back to give Alex a kiss of his own, only to be accosted with, 

“You baked muffins—?” 

*****

The muffins were good, the peppermint hot chocolate marginally less so (too much peppermint), but they took their vittles to the living room to lounge by the fireplace among the poinsettias and other decorations Achilles had put up in the two hours before Alex had woken. 

He’d someone, somehow, forgotten to purchase a tree—absolutely ridiculous, who even was he? Truly, never mind all the half-eaten takeout, that was the real indication of his mental state earlier this season…—and worse, had only realized it after purchasing a (wildly expensive) set of silver and gold glass ornaments. With no choice but to improvise, he’d hung them from the mantel like stockings and strung the white string lights and ribbon across the beams of the ceiling.

As for the crystal star topper he’d spent two days scouring the web for—he had tied it to the top of the potted plant Elliott had gifted him so many seasons ago and placed it in the center of the coffee table alongside an admirable stack of gift bags and presents, each neatly labeled with the name of their recipient—Elliott, Leah, Emily, Shane, among others. 

One gift bag was already empty, its contents and swathes of wrapping paper strewn across its giftee’s lap—a smart watch (the latest waterproof model, as Achilles had previously promised); a plush, embroidered towel; a pair of sneakers he knew Alex had been eyeing; and a bright blue bandana, a bag of treats, and a thin leather collar. 

“But that’s all for Dusty, not you, just to be clear,” Achilles said, taking a peek into the gift bag Alex had handed him just as Alex experimentally unclasped the collar. “I mean. Unless you want to wear it, I won’t say no, exactly…” 

Like a kid—the true Winter Star spirit—Alex dissolved into a fit of giggles so “disgustingly, overwhelmingly adorable” (as Achilles would say later that evening in a marginally more inebriated state) that Achilles’ cheeks couldn’t help but hurt from smiling so hard. To cap it off, Alex crawled across the couch to tackle him in a tight squeeze of a hug. “Thank you, Ash.” 

For Achilles, Alex had gathered a selection of small goods, each accompanied by a handwritten little note: a mini umbrella (“Because you still haven’t baught one, you punk. Remember that time you left Penny and I in the rain?”); a cat shaped mug, complete with a lid with ears (“Because you always spill tea on yourself”); a nice set of waterproof notebooks (“Because I accidentally totally ruined that one notebook of yours that time we went out on the boat, and especially now that you write around water a bunch”); a sheet of colorful temporary tattoos (‘Because your always doing a good job every day!’), and finally, a framed photograph that Achilles didn’t quite recognize.  

“It’s from my birthday party, when Haley was taking photos—she showed me this one a few weeks ago, and I just thought it was… nice.” Alex shrugged from over Achilles’ shoulder.

Now that he was taking a closer look, he recognized the game of beach volleyball going on in the background. It was a candid shot, for sure—Achilles half sprawled in the sand, laughing, after spiking the ball across the net. Alex grinning, kneeling down to help pull him up under the glow of the sunset. 

Achilles held the frame between his hands and stared resolutely down at the photo, his eyes beginning to burn just the tiniest bit. “Thanks, Al.” 

“Oh, but Voltaire, I’m so sorry, I’m the worst, I didn’t get you anything—”

With a small start, he looked up to witness Alex scooped up the maine coon in one fluid motion and bury his face in his fur. 

*****

“So, which one of those is for the gift exchange?” 

Post-violent cuddling, Voltaire had wriggled himself from Alex’s grasp and found a comfortable spot in Achilles’ lap, while Achilles himself had chosen to stretch across the sofa, his head in Alex’s lap. Alex subsequently had no lap to lie on, but he was now donning a giant green bow that Achilles had managed to violently stick to the top of his head after a couch-side tussle. Stuffed on muffins and hot chocolate, they had only a few minutes to go before they were to head over to Pelican Town for the community celebration. 

“Hmm?” Achilles glanced back over at the presents surrounding the Potted Shrub of the Winter Star. “What gift exchange?”

“The one for the festival?”

“Fuck. What one for the festival?”

“The one—well it’s why the town shows up an hour early—Lewis didn’t tell you? I told him you never check your—”

“Fucking hell—”

“Oh, Achilles, when will you learn—”

Achilles bolted from the couch, sending Voltaire sprawling with an indigent “Meow!” to the ground, and sprinted out the door to the mailbox. With a huff, he wrenched the little flap open and scooped the entire contents to the snowy ground. 

“Put a jacket on, put a jacket on—sheesh, man, you’re gonna get pneumonia again—” Alex, hopping bowlegged among the snow drifts, caught up a moment later, throwing a coat over Achilles’ huddled figure. 

Advertisements, bills (that he paid online), and letters, so many letters—seriously, who was sending him mail these days? He hurriedly dug through the stacks of paper fluttering about on the ground, keeping an eye out for the pale green envelopes he knew Lewis was apt to use. 

“��Starting tomorrow, a traveling merchant fleet…’ No...” 

Alex was helping now, too, squatting next to him, squinting at a cream sheet of cardstock in his hands. “‘Dear Ah—Ah—’ Geez Louise, is that really how your name is spelled or is my dumb bunny brain just kicking into overdrive? ‘One… week from today…’ Man, this is from last season, Ash—”

“Gift exchange? Like a Secret Santa-esque event? Fuck, I didn’t even opt into this, does Lewis just assume everyone wants to participate?” Achilles flung a belated invitation to Spirit’s Eve into the “discard” pile. 

“Yeah, it’s kinda tradition…” Alex studied another sheet of cardstock carefully before adding it to the growing pile. “But heyyo, maybe you’ll have like Leah or Elliott, someone you already bought something for—”

“Oh, it’s going to be someone like… Demetrius. Or Caroline. Fuck, this is going to be so embarrassing—wait, oh my god.” 

“What?” 

“‘This is embarrassing… “

“It’ll be fine, we’ll figure something out—”

“No, no,I’m reading aloud—listen to this—

‘Achilles, this is embarrassing. I lost my lucky purple shorts. I’m telling you because I think I can trust you. If you find them, bring them back to me DISCREETLY. I’ll pay well. Th-th-thanks. M—Mayor—’” Achilles, whose voice had been remarkably increasing in pitch into teakettle territory as he read the note, began to succumb to his fit of laughter, barely choking out the final words. “‘Mayor Lewis.’ Pay well? Pay well? Does he realize who he’s trying to bribe?” He passed the note to Alex. “I can’t…”  

“Holy moly—”

“I can’t. I wish I had found this earlier—”

“Yoba, why the heck does he think he can trust you, you literally just moved here this year—”

“God, and the thing is, now that I think about it, I have seen a pair of purple shorts—”

“Oh, Ash, we have five minutes before we need to go—”

“—but what did he expect me to do—”

“Ash—”

“—just waltz into her bedroom and grab ‘em from the floor—”

“Achilles—are you listening to me, we have five minutes—”

“All right, all right, all right….” 

They continued to search, until finally, a little “Bingo!” indicated Achilles had found what they’d been looking for. He waved the envelope under Alex’s nose in celebration before unfolding the rest of the note.  

“Read it aloud!”

“Why? You got the same damn lett—okay, okay, fine… 

“’Dear Ashe Achilles…’” 

He glanced up. “How is it that the bastard still can’t spell my name?”

“Maybe if you opened a letter once in a while you could’ve corrected him earlier.” 

“Sassy. Ok—

“‘I would like to give you some information about an upcoming event: the Feast of the Winter Star. It’s a time for the community to come together and think back on all the good fortune we’ve had this year. A favorite tradition is the ‘secret gift exchange,’ where everyone in town is randomly assigned to someone else. On the day of the festival, everyone brings a gift for their secret friend—‘ Secret friend? Who says that? That sounds like something you’d call an affair partner—” 

“Keep reading you punk!”

“’And surprise them with something special! This year, your secret friend is—” Achilles flipped over the letter. “Please don’t be Clint, please don’t be Clint, I haven’t spoken to him in— Oh. A thing like that.” 

“Who is it?” In his anticipation, Alex nearly lost his balance from leaning so far over, but Achilles gave him a light shove. 

“Well you know,” he folded the letter and gave it an aggravatingly pompous little tap as he inserted it back into the envelope. “Lewis says I’m not supposed to tell anyone…”

“I’m trying to help, man—”

“You. My ‘secret friend’ is you. Well.” Achilles stood, both arms full of mail that he fully intended to use as kindling that evening. “That makes it easy. Come on, let’s just put something back in the box, I’ll rewrap it and bring it to Pelican Town. Can’t show up empty-handed, don’t need Lewis telling me I’m a disgrace to the community or something…” 

He padded back to the porch before turning back to Alex. “Damn, I’m sorry, Al. Could’ve surprised you with one more gift had I been a normal person and checked my mail…” 

“It’s okay!” Alex opened the door and gestured for him to go in first. “You’re my surprise gift. Although if I can be honest…”

From behind, Alex embraced Achilles as they reentered the farmhouse, and, lifting him slightly off the ground, gave him a little spin—god, he would never in a million years get used to the feeling of being wrapped in those arms—“I think ya boy may have low key been calling you my boyfriend in my head since like our first date.” 

“Oh yeah? You want to make Winter 13 our anniversary date instead? I’ve always felt sharing with a holiday halves the fun of both the holiday and the anniversary, so while you do get the same amount of fun overall, everything somehow feels… less… hmm. Saturated.” 

“I’ll take your word for it, you of all people would know.” Alex sighed at the pile of mail Achilles had dumped unceremoniously onto the living room floor before unclasping his new watch from his wrist. “Let’s rewrap this one, let me flex my rich boyfriend on all those other Zuzu townies…” 

*****

Crisis averted. Achilles had rewrapped the shoes (he had persuaded Alex that a gift as expensive and pseudo-flashy as the watch wouldn’t be in good taste for a public gift exchange, even though “Everyone knows you’re rich, Ash,” “I don’t even know how everyone knows, it’s not like I go around talking about it, that’s tacky as hell,” “Achilles, both your parents and you have Wikipedia pages and you singlehandedly fixed the town’s mining cart system.”) in a jiffy, and before they knew it, they were bidding farewell to Voltaire and making their way east to Pelican Town. 

“Achilles, this is where we first met!” 

Alex had given Achilles’ arm an eager little tug. He glanced at the approaching bus stop bench that Alex was gleefully pointing out. A year ago, they’d both dove under the stoop to hide from the Spring rain, but today the benches were soaked with melted snow that’d been blown under by this Winter’s temperamental winds. 

“Oh. Sure, I suppose.” He craned his neck for a better look—why was Alex pointing this out?“We walk by this almost every day, Al.” 

“Titanic?” 

“Pardon? Now you’ve really lost me.” 

“I was quoting Titanic. Remember? You quoted Titanic?” 

“No, when did I quote Titanic?”

“Here, at the bus stop! Oh, wait no, my bad, actually, I take that back, you quoted Titanic that night on the boardwalk…” 

“Oh, no wonder I don’t remember—” 

“You called yourself a poor little rich girl.” Alex chuckled at the memory. “I hadn’t watched it at the time, but I rented it with Haley a couple weeks after...”  

They were now parallel with the bus stop, and both stopped, standing side by side, to take a look.

“If it hadn’t rained that night, do you think we’d still be friends?” 

“Oh, for sure, we would’ve met each other sooner or later…” Achilles shrugged. “Small town. Even smaller number of people who could pronounce my name correctly, appreciate mediocre children’s literature, and enjoy House of the Phoenix.” 

“Yeah, that’s true…” Alex gave the bus stop a little tilt of his head before leading them onwards. “But even in a big town I like to think we would’ve found each other.” 

They entered Pelican Town walking in step, and as their shoes hit well-shoveled cobblestone and the sounds of carols filled their ears, Achilles slipped his fingers through Alex’s, prompting a little “Ope!” to escape his lips. 

“I thought you didn’t like holding hands?” 

“Mmm. But you do.”  

*****

Pelican Town was awash in pastel fairy lights twinkling like cotton candy stars across the snow. Massive candy canes, taller than Alex, rose from the ground alongside newly erected pine trees— smaller than the one in the center of the square, but ornamented with the same colorful cheer. 

The fences had been wrapped in garlands of green and red and wreaths hung from ever home. There were no actual carolers, but the music was blasting merrily from speakers hidden deftly within massive, faux gift boxes scattered among the town. 

Between the obvious festive cheer and the man standing next to him, Achilles’ heart couldn’t be set more aglow; he was holding onto Alex with both hands now, pulling him close as they laughed at nothing under the bright Winter sun. Yoba, even the temperature was perfect. Not a hint of wind now, and the snow was quickly fading to flurries… He hadn’t felt so carefree in years.  

“Oh my! Aren’t you cold, dear? It’s freezing!” Evelyn, herself in a bright pink puffer jacket, greeted them with a hug each. “That coat looks much too thin, Achilles… perhaps you can grab one of Alex’s before Lewis arrives…”

The Festival didn’t open to the public until 1pm; the hour before was reserved for the townsfolk to celebrate, and they were all currently waiting for Lewis to kick off the gift exchange. 

Achilles laughed—he was doing a lot of that lately—and waved aside her concerns. “I’m fine, but thank you, Evelyn.” 

 He was happy to see George greet his grandson, though the old man offered him only a stiff nod. Achilles wasn’t surprised; he was quite mindful of those beady eyes watching him grip Alex’s arm. But even so, it was an improvement over the silent treatment they’d both been receiving before. 

But as Evelyn ruffled his hair, he felt something slap his thigh and he looked down to see George force a single, still-steaming snickerdoodle cookie into his hands.

“Oh. Thank you… for this, George, these are my favorite.” 

George grunted. 

Soon, Mayor Lewis arrived, and after gathering the townsfolk in front of the tree in the center of the square, gave a lofty speech espousing the usual values of community and friendship and holiday cheer before finally kicking off the gift exchange. 

Achilles was given a tub of clay from Jas, which he accepted with a significant degree of feigned enthusiasm. Perhaps Leah would appreciate it. Shane’s god-daughter however, also handed him a second box that was revealed to contain a multipack of typewriter ribbon. He strongly suspected Shane must’ve intervened, a theory all but confirmed by the stout man’s intense stare as Achilles thanked the girl for the gifts. 

They could hear the crowds beginning to form—the Feast of the Winter Star was allegedly the third most popular festival for the Valley (behind, of course, Zuzu Time’s #1 Ranked Spirit’s Eve Celebration 10 years in a row and the County Fair), though Achilles wasn’t exactly sure why, given the lack of activities. Truly, outside of Haley’s photo booth, the Feast was, as its name suggested, mostly just a feast. 

It was free to attend, but donations were welcome. Achilles himself had donated five hundred dollars the preceding week, though apparently that hadn’t been enough for Lewis, who had cornered him halfway during the gift exchange, waving a metal tin under his nose and shouting something about “esteemed representatives of the community.” 

But all things come to an end—including Lewis’ nagging, and when 1pm hit, Lewis had no choice but to leave Achilles alone and open the gates for the public. The Feast had officially begun! 

*****

They had managed to snag a table before the majority of the newcomers streamed in, but the moment Gus declared the meals ready, Alex quickly leapt to his feet. “I can get us food—no, don’t get up! I’ll grab it, you stay here, don’t worry.”

He skipped over to wait in the already egregiously long line, leaving Achilles to fend for himself when Haley slipped into the seat next to him. She set her camera between them and folded her arms primly atop the table, giving a curt little nod in Alex’s general direction.

“Look at him,” she sniffed, not waiting for Achilles to follow her gaze. “It’s a strange thing to see, after knowing him all these years… Don’t get me wrong, he’s always been nice to all his girlfriends, you’re not special there. Keeping chivalry alive singlehandedly.” 

Someone—a stranger, likely from Zuzu—approached them to take an open seat, but Haley shot the man the most disparaging look down the bridge of her nose, and he scampered away. She continued as if nothing happened, tracing a line down the tablecloth with a perfectly manicured finger. 

“It was… different then, though. I always thought there was something… not inauthentic, per se, but you could tell the boy’s heart wasn’t really ever into it… Can’t believe I never called it, who even am I. Gay and asexual. Gaysexual? Who’d have thought, really, given the way that man allegedly fucked his way across campus sophomore year, though perhaps the ‘allegedly’ was really carrying all the weight this whole time—”

“Such a lovely way with words, you always have—”

“Anyway, all that to say, he still seems quite different with you. I don’t know how to describe it, exactly. Hmm… With you… Well.” Haley took a sip from her cider and slowly curled her fingers around Achilles’ gloved wrist. “He just worships the ground you walk on, doesn’t he?” 

Achilles watched Alex chat with Stardew’s favorite troublemaking trio in line. He was easy to pick out from the masses; the bomber jacket he’d pretty much stolen from Achilles at this point; the way he stood, perfect posture with his heels slightly off the ground, like a bird ready to take flight; the precise angle at which he tossed his head back when he laughed. 

Achilles smiled and turned back to Haley. “And I the air he breathes.” 

“Quoting something? That sounds like a quote.” 

“Mmm. Elliott’s novel, actually.” 

She tittered. “What were the chances you think, of him actually choosing you?”  

“I choose not to dwell on such inane, trivial matters.” Achilles took in her single raised eyebrow and rolled his eyes. “I don’t think about it. Why, you don’t approve?” 

“Oh, please.” It was Haley’s turn to roll her eyes. “Do not ever ask me again if I don’t approve.” 

And with a sharp flick of his nose, she stood and flounced away. 

*****

Sebastian, Abigail, and Sam joined Achilles and Alex at their table, plates heaping with food rivaling that of even his parents’ party. Roasted carrots popping against slices of honey glazed ham, gravy-laden goose next to crispy green bean casserole, cranberry sauce dripping into steaming corn bread—Alex had made sure to grab him a slice of chocolate cranberry pavlova as well (“You gotta get the desserts right away, otherwise they’re all gone”). 

As to be expected, Elliott and Leah soon followed, along with Penny and Maru. It was turning into quite the little Stardew Valley party over at their table; unfortunately Emily was stuck helping Gus with the catering, and Haley had returned to her photo booth. 

“Oh darn it, I forgot the drinks—I’m going to get some hot chocolate, I think. Do you want one? No, no, you stay here, I’ll grab you one!” Alex bounded from his chair for the drinks station. 

“Hi!” 

A girl seemed to have popped out of thin air—early 20s, if Achilles were to venture a guess, with gold ringlets and rather blinding white teeth. Instinctively, Achilles found himself stifling a groan.

“The guy who just stood up—are you guys friends with him?”

It was Leah who responded, in her usual sardonic tone, hands perched primly under her chin. “Well, seeing as we’re all eating and talking together, I would venture to say… yes.”  

The girl admirably remained unruffled and gave a little nod to another woman at the neighboring table. “My friend over there was just wondering if he was single, she was hoping to give him her number if so.” 

Elliott let out a hearty guffaw, and, with Leah, naturally looked at Achilles. 

This always happens, why does this always happen… He turned to look at the girl. “Ah. He’s my… partner.” 

But she only furrowed her brow. “Partner? Like… business partner…?” 

This time, it was Leah who snorted into her mashed potatoes, though Abigail and Sam’s eyes had both turned as wide as saucers at Achilles’ reveal. 

A reveal it seemed he’d have to further clarify. “No… like, a boyfriend sort of partner. He’s my… boyfriend.” 

It took everything in him to keep a straight face as Abigail and Sam flopped dramatically in their chairs and began beating the dining table with their fists. 

“Oh—oh.” The girl turned red and took a step back. “Oh my god, that’s so embarrassing—of, course, I’m so sorry, I’m an idiot—I’ll tell my friend, but you two—you two make a gorgeous couple— like, gorgeous, so cute—okay, bye! Sorry for disturbing you, have a happy Winter Star!”

“Is this my life for the next… I don’t know, for the rest of my life?” Achilles asked just as Alex returned with two mugs of hot chocolate. 

“Is what your life? Who was that woman you were talking to?” 

“Jealous?” That was Abigail, jabbing her fork towards his general direction for emphasis. 

“What?” Alex’s brows knitted in his confusion. “No—why would I be—”

“What else do women ever want went they approach us?” Achilles patted Alex’s hand as he took a swig from the mug. “You.”

Sam continued the bombardment, adding with a mock groan, “We get it, Alex, you’re hot. God, leave some for the rest of us, will ya—” 

“—now doncha worry, Achilles told her you’re his partner—” 

“Partner?” Alex turned from Abigail back to Achilles, who gave a little shrug. “Like… business partner?” 

Oh, Alex… 

But before he could explain, Maru jumped in. “A rapidly growing number of people around the country are using the word ‘partner’ these days in lieu of ‘boyfriend’ and ‘girlfriend’ when referring to their significant other. It’s a much more inclusive term, I’m surprised you haven’t heard it before—” 

Achilles quickly cut in. “I’ve personally just never particularly loved using the word ‘boyfriend.’ But I don’t mind if you do, you can use whatever you’d like.” He placed a hand atop Alex’s shoulder, gave it a squeeze.

“Partner…” Alex seemed to roll the word around in his mouth, savoring the feel of those two syllables. “It sounds very adult. I can see why you like it, seems on brand.” 

*****

After the feast came a performance from the Meteor Elementary children’s choir. Familiar faces, Achilles saw, peeking above red and white turtlenecks. He cheered alongside Penny, standing to applaud as the students took their bows.   

Near the tail end of the Festival, as the sun began to set and the holiday lights began to flicker on, Lewis and his crew began to clean up the food-laden tables to clear some space in the square. The jolly carols that had been playing slowly transitioned to a more crooning series of tunes, as those who remained headed for the dance floor.  

Neither Alex nor Achilles were particularly inclined to join, both rather full on one too many servings of ham; the former was deep in conversation with Megan and none other than Tanya from Orange Grove, while the latter was jotting down a sudden idea into a notebook propped against the edge of the table. But when his favorite Winter Star ballad came on, Achilles stood and offered his hand. 

“Sorry, I don’t know how to do this right,” Alex shyly mumbled as Achilles led him to the floor and slid his free hand around his waist. “I don’t know where I’m supposed to put my hands—never done this with… well, you know…” 

“Your boyfriend?”

“My partner?” 

“In crime or business?” 

Alex laughed and followed his partner’s lead, placing his hand on his back and leaning into his body, his cheek against Achilles’, with a small, satisfied sigh. 

*****

“Well. Now comes the painful hour where I must release you to your forebears…”

Achilles, slightly tipsy now from a handful of unsuspectingly strong hot toddies, gave Alex a low bow before accidentally tripping forward. 

“I’m not drunk,” he insisted, though he allowed Alex to scoop him up and then subsequently buried himself in his sweater, breathing in the lingering scents of garlic mashed potatoes and gingerbread, enveloping himself in his comforting warmth. “I just… lost my balance.” 

“You don’t need to defend yourself. Need me to walk you home?” 

“I don’t need it, but I mean… it is dark… who knows, I could get lost in the woods…” He walked his fingers up Alex’s chest as Alex chuckled softly and ruffled Achilles’ what had been meticulously styled hair. 

“Woods my butt, the only thing between your house and town is the bus stop. But come on. Let’s get you back.” 

The Festival had ended, the crowds had dispersed. The tree would stay up until the end of the season, but the rest of the decor was already being packed away by Lewis, Marnie, and the rest of the usual team. 

Having lain claim to Alex that morning, Achilles now had to bid the man farewell, for Alex was to spend the evening with his grandparents. They walked back to Strawberry Farms, Achilles with his two-handed grip around Alex’s arm (“This is not for stability, because, again, I’m not drunk. I actually just really like you, believe it or not.”), with only the sound of snow crunching underfoot. 

But he broke the silence as they passed the “Strawberry Farms,” sign Leah had carved for him, the paint looking just as fresh as it had when she’d given it to him that Summer, and half-tittered the chorus of a carol before asking, “Did you have a good Winter Star, baby?” 

“The best.” Alex gently pulled himself out of Achilles’ grip to wrap his own arms around his waist as they walked. “This morning was my favorite part, though, I think.” 

God, he was absolutely intoxicating—more so than any drink Achilles had had that night. Every part of him—his touch, his smell, even his voice, like whiskey burning through every one of Achilles’ veins. 

“I love you, Alex,” he murmured. He could see Alex smile under the faint glow of the approaching porch light. Achilles stepped forward, kissed him softly, and whispered again, into his lips, “I love you so much.” 

Alex responded by giving his nose a pinch (“Ow, what are you doing, it’s not even twitching.”). “Hey, you drink lots of water before you go to bed, you hear me?” 

Achilles waved him off. “Yes, mother—I told you, I’m not drunk.”

“Sure, sure.”

“No I’m not, I had maybe two drinks… as if I’d dare over indulge in public like that. And in front of Lewis, no less… but don’t you worry, Voltaire and I are going to make a very strong cup of tea tonight with our new mug.” 

“Good.” Alex kissed his cheek. “I love you.” And then, just before stepping off the bottom step into the dark, he turned and added, “Thank you.” 

[biggestsimp12]

🔞Smut prompts🔞

____________________

1. "There's only one rule. You can't use your hands."

2. "Look deep into my eyes, sweetheart."

3. "I want you to leave marks."

4. "I want to watch you fall apart."

5. "I dreamed of you all night."

6. "Face down on the bed. Now."

7. "Don't apologize about your morning wood."

8. "Fuck me like you mean it"

9. "Spank me."

10. "Take me now."

11. "Tell me how you like it."

12. "I just want to please you."

13. "Tell me I'm a good boy/girl/lover."

14. "I know for a fact that you can be a hell of a lot louder than that."

15. "We've been at it like rabbits, how are you still horny?!"

16. "It was so worth the injury though!"

17. "Saddle up doll."

18. "Did you just look me up and down and then bite your lip? 'Cause if you did we're having sex. Right now."

19. "Your ass is going to be seven different shades of red after that little stunt."

20. "God damnit, now all I can think about right now is you licking my cock like its that ice cream cone."

21. "If I have to pull over, you won't be able to walk for the next week."

22. "Don't make me take you home and punish you."

23. "I've never wanted anyone to fuck me this badly."

24. "You're not going out in that outfit."

25. "Don't give me that look."

26. "You're more than just a one night stand."

27. "Would you just shut up and kiss me already?"

28. "You want me to give you your book/phone/item back? Make me."

29. "Like what you see?"

30. "Try to stay quiet, understand?"

31. "We're in public, you know."

32. "I didn't know you were so sensitive."

33. "Don't be so rough. there can't be any marks."

34. "I really don't care. You still look hot and I'm trying not to kiss/fuck you senseless right now."

35. "Are you sure? Once we start, I might not be able to stop."

36. "No, I'm supposed to be making you feel good."

37. "Make me."

38. "Stop teasing me so much."

39. "You're in trouble now.'

40. "Take off your clothes."

41. "I'm waiting."

42. "First one to make a noise loses."

43. "Me."

44. "We can't do that here!"

45. "Behave."

46. "What did you just say?"

47. "You little slut."

48. "Your screams are melody to my ears"

49. "Call me master."

50."Trying to test me?"

51."You want to have sex in the elevator? Challenge accepted!"

52. "Why did you wear underwear, when you know I'm going to tear it off anyway?"

53. "Isn't the thrill of getting caught half of the fun?"

54. "Since I've been good, it's time you let me have a taste of you."

55. "You want to put what, where?!"

56. "Your ass or your breasts... the choice is up to you."

57. "Show me how you play with yourself."

58. "Using your teeth, is the only way I'm granting you access tonight."

59. "I don't 'make love', I fuck."

60. "I'd fuck you all night long."

61. "You look like a fucking dog in heat."

62. "You look so fucking hot right now."

63. "Fuck-faster~"

64. "FUCK, I'm gonna come!"

65. "I'll fuck you right here, right now."

66. "Babe, fuck-not here."

67. "You're one cocky motherfucker. Let's go back to my place."

68. "I want to bend you over and fuck you until you can't walk."

69. "I want you to fuck me until I can't walk."

70. "F-fuck-please--"

71. "I'd let you fuck me any day."

72. "You better use a fucking condom."

73. "Tell me what you want me to fucking do to you."

74 "Come here."

75. "Watch me."

77. "I don't want to hear your excuses anymore."

78. "If you can't sleep...then how about we have sex?"

79. "Put that thing away!"

80. "Don't kink shame me."

81. "If you interrupt me one more time, so help me god.

82. "I'm going to put on some clothes before you say anything else."

83. "Tell me what you want." 84. "Beat me."

85. "If you insist."

86. "Could he make you feel as good as I do?"

87. "You're n-not um, w-wearing anything under that. are you..?"

88. "Are you trying to turn me on or are you really just that oblivious?"

89. "You taste like fucking candy."

90. "The only way you're getting off is on my thigh."

91. "You make a sound and its game over."

92. "Just let me finish this/this level and I swear ill go

down on you until you cum at least three times."

93. "If I have to stop what I'm doing, you won't be able to walk for the next week."

94. "I could just pull your bikini bottoms to the side. no one will notice."

95. "I haven't even touched you and you're already this wet.

96. ​​"Were you just masturbating?"

97. "U-uh.no, i was just.."

98. "Want some help?"

99. "Ngh.. Fuck it"

100. "Look how pretty you look all fucked up"

___________________________

Feel free to use!

[linzerj]

20 Questions for Writers

I was tagged by @sinvulkt for this 20 Questions for Writers ask game!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

On AO3... i only have 12 currently. (On FFN however... I have 67 lol)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

107,857

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Primarily Marvel nowadays, specifically Doctor Strange (MCU)! But I've also consistently written for Danny Phantom, and also delved into Pokemon, Teen Titans, TMNT, Warriors Cats and Twilight back in the day... its a lot lol.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Golden Gate's Heroes - a Venom and Ant-Man/MCU crossover from before NWH/Venom 2. It has 2,238 kudos as of posting!

Displaced Phantom - a DP and MCU crossover, 577 kudos

Stars Will Light the Way - What If...? Strange Supreme met America Chavez? The longest fic I've posted lol, 476 kudos

alive - an introspective look at Mewtwo, assuming the one from Detectice Pikachu is the same as the one from Pokémon: The First Movie, 420 kudos

through the multiverse - connected drabbles following the Guardians of the Multiverse from the first season of What If...? 329 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to! Sometimes I might not see it or forget to reply if I don't reply right away lol, but I love engagement on my fics and I always want to make sure I thank everyone for reading!

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Uh. Hmm. I actually... don't know? Maybe one of my post-Infinity War pre-Endgame Doctor Strange fanfics, like Eidetic or death is an old friend? Just because they end with Infinity War and that was tbh a kinda angsty ending...  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably has to be Stars Will Light the Way, tbh. Most of my fics are fairly "happy" tbh but so many are oneshots and anthologies, that this seems like the best pick.

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

I've gotten maybe one "hate" comment, just telling me my pacing was too slow for their liking or something like that lol. But generally, my audience has been very nice!

9. Do you write smut?

Nope!

10. Do you write crossovers?

OH YEAH!! A good chunk of my old fanfics on FFN were crossovers lol. Actually my first several fics were all crossovers I'm pretty sure. I love a good crossover...

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I am aware of... and don't get any ideas folks!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Um... no, I don't think so!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Nope!

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

Uhhhh.... hmmm.... its hard to say. I am very much a multishipper - I'll ship one guy with quite a few other characters if the dynamic could even conceivably work. But I also tend to prefer gen-fic or found family fics too...? But um. Uh. All-time favorite ship is probably Eddie/Venom. I will not elaborate further.

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Gosh ok it's this Blue Beetle fic, with Jaime from the Young Justice cartoon swapping places with Jaime from the movie. I just... idk how I want to end it so it's been sitting on my laptop, mostly untouched since like. September or October of 2023. Whoops...

16. What’s your writing strengths?

Idk lol, um... getting into the heads of the characters I write?? I've been told that I can capture certain characters really well, at least.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

Fight scenes can be a little tough for me to write... but also. I procrastinate on writing sometimes, and i'm terrible at planning fics out fully before i start them... so if I don't write scenes and ideas down, they're gone, and then I don't know what to write for my fic, and then the fic never gets finished 🙃

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Eh, depends on the language - I took enough Spanish to be able to pull it off, I think, and I also have a few coworkers who speak Spanish fluently who will make sure I'm doing it right if/when I use it. Other than that, I'm not sure if I trust Google Translate enough to write dialogue in any other language...

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Omg... apparently... it was a crossover between Danny Phantom and Warriors (the books about the cats)... I figured it would be Danny Phantom but that. That is hilarious to me. I really was a Warriors Cats kid....

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

It's gotta be Stars Will Light the Way. Idk man, it just... it may not be as popular as Golden Gate's Heroes, but it's currently the longest fic I've ever written and published and FINISHED, and im so proud of that. The fact that even 400+ people liked it enough to give it a kudos... I wrote that fic for me, so to know others liked it too means the world to me.

I know you're supposed to tag people for these things, but. I always feel like I'm bothering people when I do. Even though some of my mutuals, I know y'all write fic... so if you see this and want to go for it, any of my mutuals or followers, go for it, consider yourself tagged!

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 25/11/2023 (Tate McRae, Drake)

Content warning: Holiday festivities (bah humbug)

For a second week, Jack Harlow - sadly - holds onto the #1 with “Lovin’ on Me” on the UK Singles Chart. Welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

Rundown

As always, as this is very much a regular November-era episode, Hell, probably the real start of the Christmas music era, also known as the end-times, we start with our notable dropouts, which are songs exiting from the UK Top 75 - since that’s what I cover - after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40. This week, we bid our farewells to an actually pretty considerable selection of big hits, those being “TOO MUCH” by The Kid LAROI, Jung Kook and Central Cee, “Can’t Play Myself (A Tribute to Amy)” by Skepta, “IDGAF” by Drake featuring Yeat - most likely making way for Drake’s debut this week and will be back the next - “3D” by Jung Kook and Jack Harlow (also potentially back next week thanks to the Justin Timberlake remix), “Say Yes to Heaven” by Lana Del Rey, “Party All the Time” by Hannah Laing and HVRR (Rest well, sweet prince), “It Goes Like (Nanana)” by Peggy Gou, “Everywhere” by Fleetwood Mac, “Iris” by the Goo Goo Dolls, “Flowers” by Miley Cyrus, “Escapism.” by RAYE featuring 070 Shake, “As it Was” by Harry Styles and finally, “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi. It’s likely that these end up back in the chart after Christmas, and really, there is no silver lining because we’re shoveling out old tracks for even older ones.

Now as always, I will never cover all of the Christmas songs but this is the week this year where we get the influx of the truly canonised classics, at least most of them, so for their first week in the top 75 this year, we have “Let it Snow Let it Snow Let it Snow” by the late Dean Martin at #69, “Snowman” by Sia at #67, “Do They Know it’s Christmas?” by Band Aid at #65 - wow, not off to a good start at all. Thankfully, we do clean up with “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by the late Andy Williams at #57, “Fairytale of New York” by The Pogues featuring the late Kirsty MacColl at #53, “Merry Christmas Everyone” by Shakin’ Stevens at #51, “Underneath the Tree” by Kelly Clarkson at #49 and “Jingle Bell Rock” by the late Bobby Helms at #44. Wham! are at #14, Mariah’s at #16, Brenda Lee trails in third at #31. We do also see some non-holiday gains, namely “Lil Boo Thang” by Paul Russell at #36, “Angel Numbers / Ten Toes” by Chris Brown at #31 for whatever reason, “First Person Shooter” by Drake featuring J. Cole at #27 thanks to the video - more on Drake later - and “Can’t Catch Me Now” by Olivia Rodrigo at #13. We also see the bizarre re-entry for Ye’s 2010 track “Runaway” featuring Pusha T at a new peak of #34. Yeah, I assume there’s some TikTok virality here because I can’t figure out why otherwise, though it is a fan favourite - even if I think it’s pretty overrated, like the rest of that album. For the record, this is only its third week in the UK charts; it peaked at #56 for two consecutive weeks in 2010 and vanished thereafter.

And for THIS week in the UK Singles Chart, our top five starts with “Water” by Tyla at #5, in no doubt helped by remixes with Travis Scott and Marshmello of all people, and sadly not other Afrobeats artists as would have probably worked a lot better. Regardless, we then have “Stick Season” by Noah Kahan at #4, “greedy” by Tate McRae at #3, “Prada” by casso, RAYE and D-Block Europe at #2 and of course, Jack Harlow at the very top. Now to pick through our limited little bag of new entries.

NEW ARRIVALS

#75 - “Stay Another Day” - Jorja Smith

Produced by who cares?

Well, it’s that time of year again where we get the charts flooded with Amazon originals, tracks recorded for the Christmas season exclusively by artists working with Amazon Music that autoplay when you ask Alexa for holiday tracks. I think I would have loved to hear a Jorja Smith cover of “Stay Another Day”, personally, as her sultry voice would make the saccharine melodies of the boy-band original much easier to stomach. East 17’s 1994 original is barely even a Christmas song, it just happened to be released in late November and have a snowy video… well, they knew what they were doing with the sleigh bells at the tail-end. It’s not really a song I ever got, but it did spend five weeks at #1 and was the Christmas chart-topper for that year. So naturally, I’m going to talk about abstract hip hop. I made a Google form earlier this month asking for song suggestions to replace the Amazon originals, and got around 51 songs - all unique to be fair - sent to me, so I used a random number generator and selected two for this week. I probably won’t go into as much depth, and they won’t be covered in the conclusion out of fairness, and really for this suggestion, I don’t know where to start. “The Gods Must be Crazy” is a track from We Buy Diabetic Test Strips, the latest album from alternative rap duo Armand Hammer, consisting of rapper-producers billy woods and E L U C I D. With a beat from El-P, both rappers trade sarcastic, at times pretty funny, bars and some striking imagery regarding race, particularly the white misuse and misunderstanding of the black culture they use whilst also neglecting. E L U C I D goes for the abstract whilst woods is arguably more straightforward, but they both end up with some really poetic lyricism, often almost revolutionary and it definitely sounds like they’re leading a protest over some of the grooviest production I’ve ever heard from El-P, with the driving glitched-out vocals, with just enough fuzz to make it hit really hard, and a distanced, unpredictable set of drums. It’s a great track, but definitely one I feel will be much more effective in the context of the album, and I’d love to read a full analysis that puts some of what I simply don’t understand from E L U C I D’s brash delivery and woods’ as always effortless lyrical riffing into perspective.

#64 - “Surround Sound” - JID featuring 21 Savage and Baby Tate

Produced by Christo, DJ Scheme and Nuri

And bizarrely enough, we’re sticking with alternative rap though clearly, much less abstract. This was the lead single for JID’s great album The Forever Story last year, which peaked at #74 in the UK, and it was definitely one of the highlights for me, mostly because of the great use of Aretha Franklin’s 1965 track “One Step Ahead”, used similarly to how it was in Yasiin Bey’s 1995 track “Ms. Fat Booty” - which peaked at #85 in 2000, when Manic Street Preachers were at #1 - but instead layering it behind a killer trap beat. TikTok virality pushed this song back into mainstream popularity, but I’ve been bumping this one since release, with JID effortlessly rattling off flows as always, littered with breathy ad-libs and seamless rhyme schemes, so much so you almost forget most of this is just flexing. I love how the sample comes back in to act as an introductory jingle for 21 Savage, entering the ring with some of his coldest bars at that point, in a flow he hadn’t yet overused, and an overall brilliant if fleeting guest verse. Then Baby Tate strangely comes in, mostly moaning in a half-finished verse excerpt that blurts itself between the “banger” first half and a static noise that fills out the track before returning to a dark, fragmented beat that cuts in and out amidst JID’s grimier gangsta rap lyrics, with a menacing charisma honestly kind of reminiscent of Eminem, using flows and schemes that never seem to actually get a hold of the verse, it strays really far from the tightly-composed hit that makes up the first half and seems to show the grimmer reality of Atlanta that all three artists here are based in. Overall, I mean, it’s brilliant top-class hip hop, the kind you never expect to chart outside of the big-hitters like Kendrick and Cole, and I really hope it survives Christmas because it is fantastic.

#60 - “Lose Control” - Teddy Swims

Produced by Ammo and Julian Bunetta

I first heard Teddy Swims as a feature on a Meghan Trainor song, then discovered his real second name was Dimsdale so it really does not seem like a good first impression for Mr. Dimsdale or his pop-music Dimmadome but jokes aside, this has been his breakthrough hit in the US for a couple of weeks now, just hitting the top 40 on Billboard recently, and Mr. Dimsdale’s story is one we often see. He attracts a YouTube audience with cover songs and eventually sees industry attention. This is an original song and… well, wow, this guy can sing. That is probably the intended reaction to this, as content-wise, it’s not great, mostly because it feels a bit too obvious, but I mean, the whole song kind of toys on that boat of bombast, so it makes complete sense. The mix clips in the first verse with a slightly blocky-feeling bass and snaps that actually sound real and then that chorus comes in with the blasts of horns and the clanging percussion that despite the choir vocals, the clamouring of the production… it feels a bit empty, lacking in the actual composition, and I actually quite like that. It works for his raspy belt, the metallic attempt at recreating a big-band feel, it doesn’t feel “complete” or natural and this kind of breakup song where Dimsdale is rendered a broken man actually seems to warrant that sound. It even has a guitar solo that doesn’t deviate much from the chorus melody sadly but adds some needed grit before Mr. DImsdale really hits that note in the final chorus, and yet it doesn’t have a bombastic ending, or at least not as much as it needs. It just slips back out of existence, it’s kind of depressing in that aspect, I suppose. I guess, it’s not great, but I’ll take it.

#50 - “You’re Christmas to Me” - Sam Ryder

Produced by The Nocturns

The grip that Amazon has on the UK Christmas market is starting to be of concern. This is from the SEQUEL to an Amazon Prime-original Christmas film starring all British actors. There is a franchise at work, for God’s sake! At least this is an original song, and I will say this one is on YouTube but on principle, I will still refuse to review it and instead randomly select… “The Rose Song” by Olivia Rodrigo, which is also from a piece of visual media, that being the second season of High School Musical: The Musical: The Series. I have not watched that because, to put it bluntly, I’m not 12, but I’m sure it’s decent enough Disney sitcom fluff and you can definitely tell that Rodrigo still actually wrote this character’s songs, it wasn’t a screenwriter here, as it’s very much in the vein of her own solo work. It’s got similarly wordy moments, the actually pretty beautiful rising pianos amidst a shaky falsetto in the chorus, and none of the floaty over-production or attempts at grit that were on GUTS, despite one of her actually most impressive performances yet and a wonderful string swell that definitely sounds Disney but hey, there’s a reason why Disney still hits all these years on. The song’s content is about realising she’s more than what she is to this guy, who doesn’t seem to value her as a partner or really, human, and whilst it does go into clichés occasionally, it does it tastefully and with the power you can expect from a really good O-Rod ballad so… yeah, surprisingly enough, I really like this. It’d definitely be better than whatever Sam Ryder pushed out, at least. If I’m wrong, I don’t care.

#48 - “Body Moving” - Eliza Rose and Calvin Harris

Produced by Calvin Harris

I really didn’t expect Eliza Rose to grab a second hit after “B.O.T.A. (Baddest of Them All)” but I guess handing over most of the production duties to Calvin Harris is the best way to do so, and with sadly no relation to the Beastie Boys song, we have a song that feels pretty separate from “B.O.T.A.”, even if Rose has the same… interesting delivery and pretty terrible lyrics, which absolutely did not ruin that song, in fact they added to its charm. I’m not sure if I can say the same with this one, which just feels… random, for lack of a better word. The drums are all over this, layered to skitter and clatter over places where I feel they shouldn’t be, we have a whispery vocal loop from Ms. Rose in the back of the mix but still way too loud, not that you can hear it over the horn blasts that honestly don’t even sound in key, even if they probably are. They don’t build up effectively to a drop either, which just kind of crashes in with again, an overly-scattered set of metallic drum patterns, and Rose being interrupted by those gross, blaring horns. I like the keys and strings added in that second verse, probably the only real resemblance to “B.O.T.A.” here, but it doesn’t bother much with that atmosphere, neglecting it for the sake of a bombast that isn’t there. It really just doesn’t feel like anyone was in the same room making this, and it really is a shame because this collaboration on paper should have been way better.

#26 - “You Broke My Heart” - Drake

Produced by Vinylz and FNZ

Out of all the songs to chart from Drake’s deluxe edition of For All the Dogs, subtitled the “Scary Hours Edition”, it had to be the one perhaps least representative of those six new tracks, which mostly consist of sluggish, paranoid jazz-rap rambles, most of the time eschewing the need for an actual drum pattern and using endless loops for some of Drake’s most self-aware yet least sobered writings in years. For the record, I like all of them, but I am partially glad that say, “The Shoe Fits” or “Stories About My Brother” didn’t chart because they’re heady, conscious and introspective tracks, whilst this song… it’s the relapse. It’s the full circle moment where Drake gives up on trying to contextualise everyone and everything around him, resorting to monosyllabic chants in the bridge - or “hook” at a stretch - and barely landing on a coherent flow over a cascading sample beat, that seems to go for the same drumless, hypnotic feel of the rest of the bonus tracks, switching between samples of Major Harris and the Supremes before the bait-and-switch into a hard trap beat wherein Drake can just flex and dismiss instead of the bitter breakup balladeering of the first verse, back in the mode of For All the Dogs. Now why do I actually like it? Well, it’s silly, it took me by surprise, it does a good job placing the murky, desperate “Stoned Love” sample from the Supremes - which peaked at #3 in 1971 behind George Harrison’s “My Sweet Lord” at #1 - against the almost rage-esque beat where OVO protégé Smiley provides… juicy ad-libs. He eventually gets back into talking about his ex but it’s in these whispered yells and rants that are just comedy, it’s a fascinating listen to me, maybe not as good as “Wick Man” or the more lyrical tracks I mentioned earlier but very much still in good fun. It won’t last past this week, though, as Yeat will come back like Superman to rescue the UK Singles Chart from… Smiley, I guess.

#12 - “exes” - Tate McRae

Produced by Ryan Tedder and Tyler Spry

Well, that next Tate McRae album is coming sometime soon and with the help of pop songwriting giant Ryan Tedder, she’s definitely in full “pop girl” mode, and this time without an obvious Timbaland sample to back her up. And surprise, surprise - the song is not great. It’s hard to take McRae’s sing-songy chorus and fake laughter seriously when Dua Lipa does the same conceit a lot better and a lot sexier on “Houdini” whilst trying less, as Tate moves on with guys very quickly and keeps memorabilia of all of her exes even if the relationships mostly meant nothing. It’s a shame that this is awful, genuinely, like it took a while but this is driving my insane. Why do we have a random  blend of instruments functioning as the monogenre melody, and none of them mixed to be a focal point? Should I be focusing on the muffled, cheap and jaunty acoustic guitar line (which sounds especially terrible in the outro), the airy keys or the reverb-drenched rubbery vocal loop that is mixed in the chorus so it’s nearly as loud as Tate, who just sounds terrible because bless her, she’s not the best singer, and definitely not the most emotive, so she can’t sell this dead-on-arrival song with a rhythm that decided to add trap skitters for basically no reason when a more bass-focused funk groove or even a drum and bass backing would make this hit much harder. It sounds dated on arrival too, like this is something that Selena Gomez would have picked up in 2019, and McRae going for a semi-rap delivery sometimes just sounds forced and gross, especially coming from someone void of personality and full of Auto-Tune, and ESPECIALLY on the half-time trap breakdown in the second verse that made me have to stop the song just in shock of how insufferable it was. It never truly progresses either outside of layers of synth nothingness and vocal harmonies that basically register as Auto-Tuned whining baby noises from the back of the mix. God, this is just shockingly awful, especially from veterans like Ryan Tedder. Get this away from me before I start noticing more things to hate about it.

Conclusion

It should be obvious, Tate McRae gets Worst of the Week for “exes”, which is by and far the absolute worst song that debuted, and sadly, I do have enough disappointment to give the Dishonourable Mention to “Body Moving” by Eliza Rose and Calvin Harris, it is quite a shame. As for the best, we do have two great hip hop songs here, which feels good to say in a year that has been kind of lacking for mainstream rap. Drake gets the Honourable Mention with “You Broke My Heart” but the Best of the Week, similarly far ahead, goes to JID for “Surround Sound” featuring 21 Savage and Baby Tate, I really hope that one sticks around. As for what’s on the horizon, we’re safely in holiday territory now, so expect more of that. For now, thank you for reading and for once, I’ll see you earlier than next week. Stay tuned.

[grumpygreenwitch]

The Fairy and the Prince #48 + #49 + #50 + #51

Part 1 - Part 2 - Parts 3 & 4 - Part 5 - Part 6, 7 & 8 - Part 9 & 10 - Part 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 & 16 - Part 17, 18, & 19 - Part 20, 21 & 22 - Part 23, 24, 25 & 26 - Part 27, 28, 29 & 30 - Part 31, 32, 33 & 34 - Part 35, 36 & 37 - Part 38, 39, 40 & 41 - Part 42 & 43 - Part 44 & 45 - Part 46 & 47 - Part 48, 49, 50 & 51 - Part, 52, 53 & 54 - Part 55 & 56 - Part 57, 58, 59 & 60 - Part 61, 62, 63, 64 & 65 - Part 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71 & 72

Originally posted 1/18/2023

Adam learned much that year that even his teachers had not thought to include in his lessons. He asked, and they gave, though he could see in the grim, dubious looks they sometimes gave him when they thought he wasn't looking, that they didn't like having to teach him what he wanted to learn. He sat with the green pixies and with Trout and questioned them, and though they couldn't be terribly useful, every now and again they had glimpsed the princes as they went through their trials in the woods. Sharing with the pixies a whole roast duck, or a heavy piece of mutton, he urged them to speak to him of all they had seen and heard and experienced.

From them he heard that the kelpie had taken his pond back from the last flock of pixies, which was dwindling. He didn't need to send anyone eavesdropping for news of the end of the war. On a very early spring day a storm exploded over the palace and the woods and the lands beyond, violent and unexplainable, taking new growth and heavy branches from the trees, ripping off roof tiles, shattering windows and scattering flocks for two days. Like a child throwing a tantrum and flinging toys everywhere, he thought, unkindly. Trout brought him the green pixies, and Adam and Culli sheltered them in a hamper, cheeping and frightened but much appeased with honey bread, cheese rinds and warm broth. He brought them back to the woods himself, when the weather at last broke and the sun was allowed its freedom.

The trees whispered to him. There was a white she-fox waiting for him in the clearing.

"Prince Adam," she greeted him, and her voice was beautiful enough to hurt.

Adam was beyond hurting. He looked at her and saw the ghost of the fox, and the truth of her beneath it, so like Canemore that his hands tightened to fists.

Not yet, the cold black ice that everything inside him had become whispered. "Queen Conemara," he replied calmly, opening the basket and letting the pixies scatter to their nests and hollows.

The vixen's ears flattened; she was not pleased to be so obviously recognized and even less so that she was not worthy of his immediate and complete attention. "Ah, so Canemore was right. You've not been taught to show proper respect to your betters."

"I can bow, I can curtsy, and I can recite the whole litany of greetings used at a formal court, Majesty," Adam replied coolly. "It seems we're only missing one thing in this meeting. Again."

Her glamour fell from her and she stood in the clearing, a creature of pure and brittle light as much as her brother was shadow. Adam could only look at her from the corner of his eye, the brightness of her as painful as the sun over an ice field. She was inhuman, features too sharp, mismatched eyes reversed, clothes the same silver of her long hair, mouth the same pale gold and red of her crown. Her human seeming wore an exquisite satin gown that gleamed like hoarfrost under a thick white fur ruff. Under it she was like her brother, lithe and narrow and shimmering with power. "You presume, human."

"Not once," he replied. "Not once have I presumed to be anything but what I am. You and your court keep expecting otherwise, but that's neither my fault nor my problem."

She was silent, and he all but felt the questing fingers of her power probing him, looking for the lie, the trick, the deception. She couldn't accept there wasn't one, as long as she'd lived steeped in such things. A harsh gusting breeze blew through the trees, laden with fresh new spring growth, making the branches creak. Conemara's attention faltered and she drew slightly back, looking all around herself.

"I would suggest if you have something you wish to tell me, that it's said quickly, Majesty. I think the woods like you a little less than I do."

"Do you presume to command the woods? My woods -"

"Linden's," he snarled at her, and the silence in the clearing was immense. "Linden's woods. They never gave them to you, to him, to anyone of the Court. I believe your brother knows what I think of people who claim what is not theirs." He stared at her. He glamour was exquisite, beautiful; it was meant to enthrall and torture, but there was nothing left in Adam that cared.

She stared back. "I came to see you. The prince that balked my brother. He rages and froths and entertains the court. But I am Queen. I am his sister. I am his twin. I know the difference between a tantrum and true fury. One is a pleasant diversion. The other is something to be... carefully exorcised."

Adam shrugged. "You'll have your chance soon enough."

"I?" She arched a fine brow at him.

"My pardon, Majesty. Your brother will have his chance soon enough. I'm sure he lives to please you with our creative destruction."

"I don't want him to kill you."

That did bring Adam up short, but the stark, uncaring gaze she'd leveled on him told him this was not a charity. As ever before he had, he put his mind to the problem and almost instantly came up with the answer. "I'm the only one left. You'll have to wait... I think Connor's fifteen, sixteen in summer, so two years, nearly three, before you can have any sport with us. How boring that must seem, looming upon you."

"It wouldn't be, if you'd not spoiled our fun."

"War is not fun, Majesty, " he retorted. "War is what you do when you have no other way to be heard. And anyone worth a crown should be as willing to bleed for a war as those they send off to die fighting it."

They stared at each other across the clearing, and for the first time a frisson of uncertainty passed over her deceptively delicate features. Then she drew herself up proudly. "I don't want him to kill you, but he's angry enough that he might anyway. I have come to offer you the sanctuary of the Court."

"Ah, so you can have me for sport while the rest of the princes grow of age? So you can break my mind and my soul for two years running for fun?"

"Well, it's not like you'd know what was happening. I could make you forget. I could make it not matter. I could make it so it never happened."

"Majesty, only one of your kind would think any of that is a good thing."

"You forswore the crown," she hissed.

"I was fourteen, and no one offered witness," he replied. "Or do you also count the oath of the cow herder that swears he'll marry you if he can catch you in those willow-withe snares he keeps putting out during the full moon?"

"Do you want to die so badly, Prince Adam? I could do so, right here, right now."

"And you would break the Compact between you and my Queen, and not in your favor, either. Besides," he offered her a flinty little smile, lifting the empty basket to his shoulder, "I'm eighteen in less than two weeks, Majesty. Why don't you come to the woods that day and find out for yourself?"

She did falter visibly at that. "What do you mean to do?"

Adam walked away.

***

His birthday dawned with dark gray skies and a constant, steady wind full of winter's last gasp. There was no celebration, no gifts from home. He'd accepted no more letters from his father, though several had come after the Royal envoy had gone to Lestrelle and informed them their son counted them blood no longer.

He dressed in hunting clothing, warm breeches meant to keep chill and damp at bay, good boots, a vest full of pockets over a plain white shirt, a heavy fitted jacket that could, in a pinch, double as light armor. His hand only hesitated when he reached for his belt, with the matching dagger and a plain soldier's sword on it, and his eyes strayed to Trout.

The pixie's wings buzzed. "I'm not about to go grabbing them, mortal prince," it said tartly. "I've some sense."

Adam couldn't help but smile. "So you do." He put on the belt, secured under a boot Boul's obsidian dagger, shouldered his bow and a quiver full of uncured iron broadheads. Culli was watching him and trying desperately not to cry, and Adam hugged her and walked away quickly, willing to give her privacy for her sorrow. Around his neck he had a shell that had gone to opal with the ages of the world, though he'd long ago replaced the brittle woven grass cord of it with leather. In one of his pockets he had a very small piece of sunlight; in another, Trout. The night before he'd snuck back into William's old quarters; there, dusty and undiscovered, he'd found the dead prince's old keepsake box and reclaimed from it the knucklebone threaded into its sinew cord.

He walked out of the palace as if he were marching to war, silencing anyone he passed. Dane walked behind him, armed like a true man-at-arms. He'd refused to stay behind, but Adam had made him promise he wouldn't follow him into the woods. He passed close enough to the fountain to catch a glimpse of the plinth, of the dancing lady forever wrapped in her pale granite veils. She seemed to weep to see him go. The closer they got to the woods the bleaker the day seemed to get.

"Fog's rising," Dane commented.

"Calling up a Hunting Night just for me," Adam said with icy cheer. "And in broad daylight, too."

The woods were a black mass when they drew up to the edge of them, where everything seemed a thorn or a strangling vine. Adam closed his eyes for a moment and drew a deep breath, cocking his head.

Adam. So far away, the linden tree whispered in the breeze.

He opened his eyes. The shadows were moving with slow grace. "I am Prince Adam, son of the realm. Today is my eighteenth birthday."

"We know who you are, mortal," Prince Canemore seemed to resolve himself from the shadows, nothing but bone and polished black glass. "And we both know this is a formality."

"Is it?"

"Yes. You said it before, when you were too young to take your oath seriously, and even then, if I'd known what a nuisance you'd make of yourself, I would have borne you witness."

"What a pity that you didn't." Adam's voice was very quiet. "I am here to abide by the Compact between the Queen Dowager and the Prince Beyond the Woods."

Canemore faltered. Half a dozen shapes nearly revealed themselves in the dark. "Excuse me?"

"Was I unclear? I apologize. I am here to claim the right to the crown and the throne. Give me your test."

"You forswore the crown!"

"Present your witnesses," Adam shrugged politely. "None acknowledged me them. How easy it is to say now that you want to abide by the words of a fourteen-year-old boy, when it's convenient for you. My oath wasn't good enough then; you don't get it now. Now you get me. I'm here. You would test, so test me."

They were slowly seeping out of the gloom and the fog. Adam couldn't see them all, but he was suddenly aware that there weren't many of them: a dozen, at most. Behind them, however, were a great deal of creatures he knew only on passing. The smallfolk, the commonfolk. Canemore had brought them to have them bear witness to Adam forswearing the crown; instead they were there to see the mortal prince demand his challenge.

When Canemore, seething with fury at the unexpected, would have charged out of the woods, a delicate white hand caught his shoulder. "Yours is a test requiring much thought and preparation, Prince Adam," Queen Conemara said. "We would not dream of insulting you by offering less than our best."

"I am touched by the respect her Majesty offers me," Adam told her calmly. "But I am eighteen today, and I am here today."

"We don't ask for much, only a little time," she pleaded with coy, elegant charm. "We are powerful, but you catch us unprepared."

"I am mortal, Majesty. I am a reckless sort of creature, which is both failing and triumph, I suppose." Adam pretended to think. "It's true that I'm eighteen today, and I'm here today, and that demand I will not yield, but," he added, "today it is my birthday, until the bells of Mother-Night's tower ring for midnight. That seems like a sensible sort of wait, don't you think?"

"It's a little harried," Conemara's tone was just a touch tight, "but I'm sure it will serve."

"Good." Adam's tone went as cold and black as what Canemore had left of his heart. "Because if the bells finish ringing and I have not been summoned to my challenge, I will count you in default of your Compact, and I will claim my crown and my throne."

Every fairy in the Court gasped.

"You cannot," she hissed.

"Can't I? I've come to you willingly. I'm of age. I invite your challenge. You're the ones trying to put it off. Isn't this what you wanted? The right to test every candidate to the throne? Well, then test!"

There was silence at that third demand. The twins stood side by side, staring unblinking at him. Behind them, the woods seethed with whispers of magic and power.

"Would giving you my brother's head make you go away?" Conemara asked bluntly all at once, and the Court went deathly silent.

"No."

"Is it truly the crown you want?"

"No."

"What will it take for you to forswear the throne? Gold, magic, blood, knowledge?"

Adam smiled. They'd gotten to the negotiations much faster than he'd expected. "I will answer her Majesty's question, if she will answer mine first."

Conemara pursed her lips. Next to her, Canemore didn't know who to glare at, his sister or his counterpart. "Ask."

"Why are you so determined to have me walk away rather than take the test? Why are you so worried? You have a whole day to come up with whatever it might take to either destroy me or kill me. Why don't you think that's enough?"

Conemara went very still.

"My sister -"

"Be still," she snarled at her brother. "This is your fault. He would have walked away if you had not meddled."

Adam waited. The silence stretched on and on. Conemara was a pale, beautiful, brittle piece of ice and moonlight.

"You know I can win," he told her, his smile as cold as the rest of him. "You know I have a chance."

"Yes," she admitted in a single, vicious whisper.

"I will go away if you give me Linden back."

Conemara jerked as if he'd struck her. "Name another price."

"There isn't one."

"The Danu child is gone."

"I'm aware," Adam's voice was suddenly a snarl to match theirs. "I'm well aware that you took half my heart and shattered it before me because your games went awry and you didn't like it. And like children throwing a tantrum, you decided to break your toys and never mind that they were living beings. Do you seriously think his head can make up for it?! Do you think if you let me kill him once a day for the rest of my life, that it would make a bloody difference?!"

"Have a care, mortal," Canemore's voice was the growl of a wolf. "Do not pit your piddling passions to my hatred -"

"Hatred?" The one word was a bitter laugh. "Hatred? You have spent forty-some years nursing one moment of embarrassment over a trick gone wrong, and blind greed over a crown neither of you know how to carry, Canemore. You don't know hatred."

"You dare!" Conemara hissed.

"I do," Adam snarled back. "You think war is fun. You think war is entertaining. You think hatred is a thing you indulge once a week for sport. Hatred is pure. Hatred is clean. Hatred is everything; beyond it there is no love, no loss, no anger, no sorrow. In hatred there is no shame; you’ll do anything, ask anyone and damn shame and pride. In hatred there is no greed. In hatred there is nothing but the goal to see that which you hate destroyed. Obliterated. Forgotten. I spent half my life trying to keep the hatred of others off you. But your brother, Majesty, has made sure I hate nothing so much as I hate you, him, and your entire court. And I will take my crown and my throne, just so I can erase you." Adam's smiled cracked to something broken and terrible. "And even that will not end my hatred. Because the only thing that would, you cannot give me."

The shadows had recoiled. The fog had sunk to the ground. The day blustered, and the woods hissed in the rising wind.

"You mean war," Even as brightly luminous as she was in her glamour, Conemara couldn't hide that she'd gone visibly pale.

"I do," Adam confirmed mildly. "But not the sort you play at. Because in this war, I assure you, Majesty, you will be doing the fighting just as I will. Well." He clapped his gloved hands. "I'll see you before midnight, won't I. A good morning to you all," he sketched an elegant little bow, turned and walked away, leaving the two stunned siblings surrounded by their whispering, panicking Court.

Conemara whirled around and slammed her twin against a tree with one hand. Everyone scattered out of her way. "What have you done," she demanded of Canemore.

"My sister, he's nothing, he's -"

"He's human! He is iron and salt, he is silver and sun-blessed gold, he is fire and numbers, he is legion!" Her voice rose to a shriek and she had to visibly struggle to control herself. "Never. Never in all of our twenty-thousand years among them have we won a war against them. That is why we are forbidden to provoke one."

"We already have massed armies!" Canemore protested. "Even if he somehow managed to take the throne, we have armies now. We could overwhelm him with just the troops we have here. The redcaps alone -"

"Will not fight this fight for you," the low growl of a redcap preempted the Sidhe prince, and the twins whirled to face her. Tried and tested in war, Needlemaw found it ironic at that moment that peace had given her leadership of her people. Hers was the largest surviving clan. Hers were the bones of the champions of their enemies. Hers, the tactics that had won the redcaps so many battles with such little sacrifice. Her cap was the dark, rich red of fresh spilled blood, clicking and clacking with more than two dozen knucklebones. But it was news of the Queen's betrayal and the alliance that had ended the war that had the other Redcap clan chiefs looking at her for guidance. Needlemaw had given them both. Adam had given her all of it.

She could have wept for Adam, but at the moment she felt only rage at what the twins had done to her little brother.

"Do you dare defy us, redcap?" Canemore demanded haughtily.

"Defy you?" Needlemaw shrugged. "There's as much point in defying the dead as there is in taking orders from them. And make no mistake, Highness, yui're dead. The mortal prince can, and will, take his crown. And he can, and will, kill ye."

"Whatever might befall my brother, I am still your Queen," Conemara snarled.

"A Queen what's killed her people for a good show," the redcap countered mildly. "We swore our service in exchange for yuir protection. Instead ye made up a war to kill my people. We'll fight for ye if'n we feel protected again, but I dinnae think that'll be happening, with a real war creeping close." Needlemaw turned and whistled sharply, and all those redcaps who'd been present, clan chiefs and burrow mothers and fathers, fell in behind her and disappeared into the woods.

All around them, beyond the scarce few Sidhe, the rest of the Court began to melt away.

"Wait," Conemara commanded, but was not heeded. "Wait! I can win this war! He's only a boy, he's untried, he's blind and lost. If you stand with me, I will win this war, and I will remember those who stand with me."

An immense shadow rose before the Queen Beyond the Woods, and then ponderously leaned down to examine her with tiny, soulful brown eyes.

"I can do this, Stoneheart," she assured the immense troll.

He blinked, then turned a little, rumbling. "My grandson."

From behind him, absolutely tiny by comparison, Boul peeked out.

"Can she defeat the mortal boy-king?"

Boul thrummed miserably. Everything in him wanted to race after his older brother, the second one after Linden who'd ever treated him with kindness and love, who'd taken him for what he was. He wanted to mourn with Adam, to sing with him the low songs of grief that would engrave Linden's memory forever in stone and jewel. But he knew what was expected of him; he was a warrior tested and blooded. He carried shards of quartz and obsidian that hummed with the songs of those he'd felled. He had scars on the stone of his hide that would take centuries to fade. He had a single black knucklebone hanging on a sinew cord around his neck, and the flint arrow-head between his knuckles gleamed with a fresh new edge. He stared for a long time after Adam before turning to face his grandfather. "No."

"Stoneheart!" Conemara cried out.

The troll was already turning away. He pause to look at her over one shoulder. "We have fought one losing war in your name already. We will not fight another." Without further words he walked away.

Unnoticed already, Boul slipped away into the fog.

Conemara stood very still in the clearing as the fog and the shadows faded. "I have bought you time, Canemore," she said with deadly calm. "Make good use of it, because he cannot survive your test. Do you understand me? If he does, I will send you to her Court with news of the war."

Canemore blanched and bowed low. "As my sister commands."

***

"Needlemaw."

The redcap paused at the sound of that gentle bullfrog croak, looking to one side. She turned to face her people. "Go home. Lick your wounds, clean the burrows. We'll sort ourselves out before we have a good feeding hunt."

"And the Queen? The Prince?" It was a hunched, long-limbed male probably twice her size, and all of it at long, narrow angles.

"They're not our Queen or our Prince until they win this fight."

Those around her nodded in approval and scuttled away, and she stepped aside from the tide of her people to look up at the littlest, and biggest, brother that fate had given her. Standing on her tiptoes she bumped her chest against Boul's, and then touched her forehead to his. "Oh, Boul..."

"Adam," was all he said, worry immense in his voice.

"I know. I saw it too." The Prince-That-Wasn't was truly a prince at last, but his golden crown had gone to darkness, to ice and blood. Needlemaw knew what hatred was; her people were often accused of it, though in truth they couldn't feel it. Like most fey and immortal creatures, they could rage but not hate, just as they could grieve but not regret. While they'd been away fighting to entertain the Court, hatred had devoured their brother. Needlemaw suspected it had only managed the job because grief had eaten Adam empty, and left too many hollow spaces that needed filling.

"We should help him."

"We can't, Boul. This is his to face, it always has been."

"No." The young troll shook his head sharply. "Not the tests. We should help him."

"Boul, we can't. You heard him, and he spoke true. He wrung the truth out of the twins with his own. The only thing that would fix this..." She trailed off, and rubbed angrily at her face under the wild crimson curls. "They're gone."

"But they whisper."

"Boul, that's the woods, that's the wind."

"But they whisper!"

"Boul -"

The troll growled at her in profound irritation, turned, and patted his shoulder.

"Boul, I have to go tend to my people -"

"We have to help him!" Boul nearly bellowed, and pointed again.

"Do you have a plan, an idea, a means to actually help?"

"Yes!"

The answer took Needlemaw very much aback. Trolls didn't plot, didn't plan; trolls counted time by the ages of the world, and it was too difficult for them to count the tiny measure of days or hours. It made it hard for them to live in any other way than moment to moment. But Boul, she knew, had learned many ways to be far more than just a runty troll, just as she'd learned much about being more than a redcap. She scrabbled up to his shoulders and hung onto his head. When he took off at a run, she yowled in surprise.

Running on his stumpy legs, and sometimes on all fours like an immense ape, Boul raced through the woods and out of them. Rain had begun to fall, chill and faint and dispirited. "Where are we going?" she cried out.

Boul merely ran. The palace rose before them, and she shrunk low against the troll. "Boul, what are you doing, where are you taking us?"

They raced past the vast pond and the elegant fountain, spraying pointlessly into the rainy day. The troll came to a halt before the plinth with the statue of the dancing lady, scowled, and put his hands on it. "Tell us," he rumbled. "Tell us what happened. What did you see with your stone eyes. Tell us quickly. Tell us the truth of stone."

"Boul -" Needlemaw began.

"I had hoped," the statue whispered, the breath of her words moving the granite of her veils, "that someone would come and ask." Fragments of stone rolled off her and tumbled to the ground.

Needlemaw stared in disbelief; she would have never believed that troll-magic could bring mortal stonework to life if she had not been there to bear witness. "Boul, we know what happened from the pixie," she strangled out. Distractedly she realized that there was a small ring of broken pieces all around the plinth. "I don't think I can hear this again."

"Pixie, like Adam, is flesh. Flesh can be lied to. You and I know this."

Needle pressed her lips very tightly closed. "That we do."

"Cannot lie to stone," Boul told her, before looking up at the statue again. "Tell us of the Danu child."

"I could not help," the statue sighed. "All these centuries have taught me my nature too well. I wanted to move, but stone does not move." A larger piece broke off from her and they both had to step back.

"Boul, you're killing her."

"This is not me," he replied, wary. "I gave her a voice, nothing else." Quickly, he bent down to pick up a handful of the shale around the statue, and frowned. "This is old. This has seen seasons."

"Yes," the statue confirmed. "I have no heart, of course. But I think that the Prince Beyond the Woods wanted to hurt the Danu child's choice. And he had nothing to hurt him with except the Danu child themselves. But he would not give them up either."

Needlemaw's eyes went very wide. A stone arm fell and broke apart. "It was you."

"Yes," the statue wept quietly. "He took me from my plinth and dressed me in flesh, and I knew warmth for just one moment before he shattered me. I could not tell the mortal that I was not his heart in pieces on the ground. I could only watch him be destroyed as I had been." She began to collapse. "I am so glad someone has come to ask. I do not think I could have waited very much longer."

"Where is Linden?" Boul cried out.

"I do not know. I only know what I have seen and felt. I only know the truth of stone." The statue went to pieces, and her voice faded away.

"Boul," Needlemaw swallowed against a mixture of emotions so violent inside her that she could only compare it to what she'd felt when Adam had revealed to her William's betrayal. "Boul, how did you know?"

"Didn't." The troll crouched down to run his hands through the statue's rubble. "But they whisper."

"Who whispers?"

"Linden."

"Linden is - wait. You're hearing them? Now? Here?"

"No, not here. But they whisper. I thought she would know. I didn't mean her death." The troll's face was filled with sorrow.

"Boul, you gave her a voice. She wanted that more anything, and you gave it to her. Where," she asked with tight, deadly calm, "are you hearing these whispers?"

***

Adam and Dane whiled away the hours in the archery range. No one would go near them; though they'd been the only mortals at that meeting, it was entirely too easy for those at the palace to know what the prince had done. They were afraid to approach, as if Adam's hanging doom were catching. They were alone when Dane caught sight of the immense figure lurking behind the target storage building. "Adam."

Adam turned to Dane, and then to where Dane gestured. He dropped his bow and broke into a sprint. "Boul!"

"Adam!"

He slammed into the troll's arms, even though it felt very much like crashing full-force into a wall. "You're alright," was all he could say, "you're alright!"

A rumble shook the young troll's entire body, and he leaned down, so carefully, to press his forehead to Adam's. "Sad," he replied. "Missed you." He reached up to brush back the curly black crown of Adam's hair. "Got tall," he teased.

Adam couldn't help but laugh. It was brief and rusty, entirely out of practice, but it was real, and it made both Dane and Boul ache, because even without having been there the troll knew as well as the mortal that it was a sound Adam had very much forgotten how to make. "Look at you, Boul," he leaned back to examine his little brother proudly. "What are these, armor?" He touched lightly the outcroppings of quartz and obsidian embedded in the troll's skin.

"Memories," Boul replied. "They will sing the songs of my victories. Stone does not lie. Look." He lifted his hand and showed Adam the stone arrow-head the prince had given him, so long ago. Chips had flaked off the flint edge, and it gleamed fresh and deadly even in the dull drizzle that the day had become. "I remember."

Adam's heart tried to turn in his chest, but there was no room past the black coldness that filled him. Even so, it twitched, and no amount of hatred could completely quell it. "So do I," Adam admitted, reaching under his shirt for the opalized shell in its cord.

Boul thrummed, catching the shell between two fingertips, and for a moment astonishment showed in his craggy features to see how tiny it looked against his fingers. "We will not fight against you. They will fight alone." His expression turned to sorrow. "But I cannot help you."

"I know. Boul, I know, it's alright. Don't be sad. It's better this way, without you picking sides. I already nearly went sick with worry thinking about you in the middle of a war. I'd rather know you're safe." He drew a deep breath. "Is Needlemaw alright?"

"Yes. But she leads her people now. And she is hunting for whispers. She could not come. And she cannot help you, either."

"No, of course not. But leader of her people!" Adam smiled somewhat at Boul. "She's come a long way for someone afraid of heights," he teased.

Boul rumbled a quiet little laugh, his relief that Adam had taken the news well obvious.

"But she's alright? And your people and hers, they're alright?"

"Yes. Her people will not fight you, either. No one in the Court wants to fight you."

"If only they'd thought of that before -" Adam stared at the range,where Dane was shooting at targets.

"Adam." The prince blinked, yanked back to reality, and saw that Boul was offering him an outstretched hand, palm up. "Coming-back, and staying-and-waiting."

"Oh, Boul, I have nothing for you, I'm sorry!" On the troll's hand rested a round pebble, one half pink and the other white, the size of a cherry. Next to it was an exquisite ruby-and-gold button, very small, made visible by a braid of what looked like gray horse-hair threaded through it.

"You can give when you come back. We will have no staying-and-waiting gifts, so it will be even," the troll grinned, and Adam had to grin back at the neatest fairy trap Boul had ever come up with, and the implacable faith it implied.

"That sounds more than fair," he agreed, taking the gifts and examining them closely. "Well, I know the button, but what's it on? This doesn't feel like any horse hair I've known, it's almost oily."

"Dream-mare," Boul replied. "Court mount. Hard to kill, very clever. Eats flesh. Queens of all horsekind."

"So, horse and rider," Adam murmured, his smile wry. "Needlemaw, giving me poetry. And this?" When Boul pointed at his own mouth, Adam licked cautiously at the pebble. It detonated into a familiar taste in his mouth. "This is salt! A stone made of salt." He rolled it between his fingers. "It's not crumbling or anything, it really is a stone." For just a fleeting moment he was himself, full of wonder at a troll's gift, unadorned and honest, and Boul puffed up with pride. "Thank you, Boul. Thank you for the gifts, and the news. And thank you for letting me know you're both safe."

"You made us safe," the troll pointed out. "Adam, do you wish for war?"

"No one ever wishes for war, Boul," Adam admitted quietly. "But I have nothing else to wish for, and I know who did that to me. It's not a wise combination."

The troll leaned forward to touch his forehead to Adam's. "We were not young long enough, I think."

"No, we weren't. But then, we could have been young forever and I don't think it would have been enough, Boul." He paused to think and blew out a low breath. "It was good while we were young, wasn't it?"

"Yes. Be safe, Adam. Be strong, be clever. Be all the things you already are."

"I will be all that and more, Boul. You have my word."

[bigender-cowboy]

oh boy I think I saw this once but didn’t know what the fuck snogging was so let’s go!!!!!

1: Uhm. With my father. DEFINITELY NOT THE OTHER THOUGH!!!!!

2: My friend

3: not really actually. I’ve fully accepted everything I’ve ever done that I could actually regret.

4: nah. like the last thing I’ve embraced it all.

5: I have a partner and he’s VERY silly

6: for a good cause. preferably quick, but it doesn’t have to be.

7: uhhhh pasta with ketchup and sugar on it

8: hockey and ig if you count it archery. some people don’t though so. nothing professional.

9: Yes but not out of anxiety. ITS BECAUSE I ALWAYS BREAK THEM AND THEY GET UNEVEN

10: uhhhh idk some time this summer. last few months.

11: guys I might like my partner im not sure though

12: yeah and I’ve stayed up later than that. its not the hardest.

13: oh. yes. many people. its actually hard to get on that list but im autistic and people no no my things when i say them

14: yeah

15: three fish two cats

16: incredibly bored although I am getting amused by silly things

17: no why the fuck would I go in the bathroom to make out that is a stupid fucking spot

18: AAAAAAAAAA

19: NO!!!!!!!!!

20: bed (also it wasn’t sexual we were confused what the hype was about. we’re still confused what the hype is about)

21: me and my partner are in Maine rn with his family so probably rest because I get back to his place Saturday and im probably going home Sunday

22: no. IM ALREADY FATHER/SIBLING FIGURE TO LIKE 5 DIFFERENT PEOPLE IM DONE WITH THAT

23: no I used to have 3 on both ears and they all got ripped out/horribly damaged in different ways that all led to hospital trips

24: History. My teacher said I knew more than he did once. So.

25: not really. If it’s IN the past my mom but not her present form.

26: hot chocolate and powdered donuts

27: bi girls love me or something (yes)

28: nope

29: uhm. no? yeah? idk.

30: my partners rats keep attacking each other.

31: yaya

32: Maroon or burgundy. Wine color.

33: ehh. yeah. kind of.

34: uhhhhh I think I watched my partner fall off a building before turning into a bird. idk.

35: my partner but not in a actually serious way. the last person I did that in-front of was my father (in relief/joy)

36: no. im very stubborn. grudge holder.

37: neither??? ig forgive???

38: I thought not and then I thought about it and honestly maybe. not counting being a little kid, JUST maybe.

39: fuck. when I got with my partner so like…1 1/2 years ago? age isn’t being dropped though.

40: once but I really needed to check something and I had NO time for clothes

51: lemons or fettuccine with shrimp and breadsticks or garlic bread

52: not really because idgaf about it its just whatever happens happens it doesn’t matter who you are because it’ll just happen

53: threw the leech bottle and had to find out where the leech went because the bottle opened

54: no.

55: I mean im pretty nice but im also pretty snappy and defensive so at times im definitely mean but not always

56: uhm. i don’t know. dude i used to live in a trailer park where knives were pulled on you so a lot of fucking people???? i don’t know???

57: no

58: light drizzle or heavy snow

59: yes, I don’t think you’ve completed life until you’ve tied a sled to the back of a truck and gotten dragged across snow covered roads.

60: no, I hate marriage. Although I did promise my friend I would marry him for taxes if needed.

61: SHDBDBBSBS NO I HATE THE WORD BABY SO MUCH SHDND

62: a lot of things? my partner? friends? fandoms? idk

63: uhh. I already did just not to anyone but my friends and social media. legally? sure

64: nope. it was my partner.

65: tell them that I don’t like them because I have a partner and keep hanging out with them after

66: uhhh I don’t know how close I am with any cis guys. only trans guys. actually ONE guy. yes.

67: my partner’s mom’s boyfriend I think

68: my friend

69: not really

70: yeah

Open tags

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?

[jonathanvik]

Luyten V - Chapter 13

Rose’s stomach turned as she took the sudden right turn, her laser beam primed. Dirt went flying as Luyten V’s heels dug deep furrows in the ground. She adjusted the targeting computer, her fingers blurring as she made lightning-quick adjustments.

“Fire.” The beam lanced from Luyten V’s forehead gem, the target bursting into flames as her attack struck it dead on. With a quick adjustment to the targeting computer, the drone sneaking up behind her exploded.

“Phew.” Her console reported all targets neutralized. Rose wiped away the sweat on her forehead. Her mind felt sluggish, exhausted by the demands of the training.

“Nice work, Rose,” Sandage said, pleased. “That’s enough for tonight.”

“How did I do?” Rose asked as Luyten V’s tentacles deposited her on the warehouse floor.

“All thirty targets destroyed with a 67 percent accuracy rate. Well done,” Sandage said, checking his tablet.

“I just hope it’ll be enough.” They’d run this obstacle course for over four hours today, with each subsequent obstacle becoming more difficult. She accepted the water bottle a tech person offered her.

“I know,” Sandage said, his tone solemn. “But I have some good news. We’re ready to attach the enhancement I told you about.”

“For Project: Bird Bath? Will it actually do anything?” Rose asked. Like any military in a monster movie, their efforts hadn’t been very effective. 

“That’s why we’re testing it,” Sandage replied. “Gold is confident in its success. Though the Altair structure is odd and doesn’t comply with what science currently knows about biology.”

From what Rose understood, the structure of the Altair that came with Luyten V and the scout that attacked Washington, D.C., were different. This made developing a counteragent challenging, though Doctor von Fraunhofer had promised they’d made some major breakthrough in understanding the Altair. They’d just have to pray their efforts would be good enough. Only two days remained until the fated day of Okab’s attack.

“I want some ice cream or something,” Rose complained. With all this stress and uncertainty, she deserved a treat, darn it all!

This earned a smile from Sandage. “Sure, my treat. There’s a place on Main, right? I think they should still be open.”

---

“How are you holding up?” Sandage asked as they picked at their ice cream. Rose had taken two scoops of strawberry and mint, while Sandage had cotton candy and cookies and cream. Gauss got his own ice cream too, but he’d gotten a chocolate malt instead.

“Holding,” Rose replied, though it wasn’t hard to detect the stress in her voice.

“That’s good,” Sandage said, not pushing the issue. With Okab’s attack imminent, he knew his charge was under a great deal of pressure. Rose herself wasn’t sure. “Strained” was the best way to describe it, she supposed. 

They licked their treats in silence before she finally spoke. “How’s Brown doing?”

“His hospital stay ended two days ago. He’s staying with his sister while he recovers. She lives close by. Though it’ll be weeks until he returns to duty.”

“Good. I miss him.” While Gauss was nice enough, he wasn’t the same as Brown’s calm, protective presence. Pity there wasn’t time to visit him. If she survived the next few days, she’d insist on seeing him. 

A sudden flash in her memory reminded her of something: Stella was doing a karaoke stream tonight in about five minutes. Rose opened her mouth to ask to be brought home, but she closed it. While part of her wanted to rush off to watch her favorite VTuber, she couldn’t leave Sandage hanging. Besides, it was only one stream. She’d watch the VOD later.

“Besides, Stella doesn’t even know I exist, really.” Rose thought. And the occasional Superchat didn’t change that. But Sandage and Gauss—they were real, tangible. With danger lurking nearby, she’d rather hang out with real people.

“Is something the matter?” Sandage asked.

“Don’t worry about it,” Rose replied. “Thinking about it, what did you do before this Altair nonsense? If it’s not super classified, of course.”

“The truth? My life wasn’t all that exciting. I mostly did intelligence work. Helped local police solve certain crimes, that sort of thing.”

Rose’s eyes lit up with interest. “Like hunt down serial killers?”

Sandage released an amused snort. “Someone’s been listening to too many true-crime podcasts.”

This earned a blush from Rose. “Well, no. But Vera loves talking about them. And weird cults. I have no clue why she finds them so fascinating.”

They joked and talked, and Rose relaxed. She found it nice to learn how ordinary Sandage was, and how they had both gotten thrust into this craziness. As they spoke, a call interrupted their conversation.

“Sorry, Rose, but I need to answer this.” Sandage turned away to address his phone. Rose shrugged and tossed away the bowl she’d used for her ice cream. Her curiosity peaked as Sandage became more excited.

“What’s going on?” Rose asked.

“Finally, some good news!” Sandage said, alight with happiness.

“Don’t keep me in suspense. What is it?”

Sandage lowered his voice to a whisper. “Luyten V’s new weapon is close to completion. They pushed ahead the schedule, and it should be ready for testing tomorrow.”

“Perfect!” Still, the device was only a prototype. How it performed in the field remained to be seen. Still, she’d take any good news. “We should get another ice cream to celebrate!”

---

“Careless.” Okab shook his head, amused at how his prey seemed oblivious to the danger lurking amongst them. Rose and a big man were sharing some treat in a shop, talking and laughing amongst themselves. Okab got closer, straining his ears to eavesdrop on their conversation. He was careful to remain casual. Another big man was keeping an eye out for trouble, trained to spot danger.

“Typical human chatter,” Okab said, annoyed. Why didn’t humans talk about anything interesting? They would rather babble about nothing. Were they completely ignoring the threat he posed? Rose appeared too relaxed for someone with the cloud of danger hanging over her head.

“Humans.” Okab rolled his eyes. Still, he didn’t move to attack. Police and military had increased their presence in the city, prepared for any trouble. There wasn’t any guarantee he’d destroy Rose before they intervened and she escaped. Besides, despite his fellow general’s impatience, Okab wasn’t in any hurry to attack. Part of him was curious about what defenses the humans might devise to counteract him.

“What a frivolous girl,” Though Okab, he’d observed most girls her age acted that way. It amazed him how human children seemed oblivious to the troubles of their world, living in a naïve fantasy. He turned to leave when a snippet of conversation caught his ear.

“Luyten V’s new weapon is close to completion. They pushed ahead the schedule, and it should be ready for testing tomorrow,” the big man said. He’d spoken low enough that none of the nearby humans should hear him. However, he hadn’t counted on Okab’s keen senses.

Okab walked away, a pep in his step. A new weapon? Fascinating! And they were testing it tomorrow? A grin stretched across his disguised face. How about he gave them a true field test tomorrow? While Okab was patient, he wasn’t that patient. No point playing around any longer if this weapon didn’t turn the tide.

---

Rose adjusted her controls, aligning everything properly for when they attached Luyten V’s new weapon. The action took little effort, her fingers working automatically. While Rose wanted to claim it was due to the heavy-duty training she’d undergone, it was more like the pair of them had gained a symbiotic link. She was at ease in Luyten V’s cockpit, perceiving it as an extension of her body rather than a mechanical device.

Since they’d started her training in earnest, Rose had developed a stronger connection to Luyten V. It had only taken a simple mental command to summon it to her side and pull her into the cockpit. She wondered if she could summon it from across town? It flared her curiosity about how their mental link worked. Was it because Luyten V recognized her DNA, or some other connection? Even after weeks of study, the scientists barely understood how their link worked.

“Sometimes I wonder if you’re really even a robot,” Rose mused.

“Sorry?” Sandage asked.

“Nothing. I’m ready on my end,” Rose replied. “You can show the surprise already—stop keeping me in suspense!” The fact her new weapon had come in a vision from Cecilia’s mysterious Altair Records only heightened her curiosity. The girl in question observed from the sidelines, eager to see the fruit of her efforts.

Thick metal straps fell from a sheet-covered object the length of Luyten V’s arm. Sandage watched on like a proud parent, guiding the techs’ efforts from his position on a nearby catwalk.

“Oh,” Rose exclaimed as techs pulled the sheet from the device, its red surface glimmering with fresh paint. This wasn’t what she’d expected.

“Attaching Luyten V’s Devil Drill,” Sandage said. 

Cranes lifted the device from the cement floor with cables thicker than Rose’s entire body. They strained under the weight but held firm. They lifted it up to Luyten V’s left arm, fastening it onto the appendage with an audible thud. Through her control stick, Rose sensed the added weight. She stared at her new weapon, marveling. The arm extended past Luyten V’s hand into a drill head longer than a basketball court. The jagged edges of the blade were sharp, ending with a wicked-looking three-prong edge.

“Devil Drill?” Rose said, raising an amused eyebrow.

Through her comm, she heard Sandage’s shrug. “The Luyten V has earned the nickname Red Devil. It seemed appropriate.”

“A drill, though?” Still, she marveled at its power as she activated the device, whirling at speeds that would make a tornado blush. It would do some serious damage if it connected with an enemy.

“Okay, it wasn’t designed as a weapon exactly. But it works against the Altair’s healing factor—much more effective than any cut or blunt trauma,” Sandage replied.

“It’s cool.” She waved around the new add-on, getting used to its added weight. The left arm was an interesting choice, it wouldn’t interfere with Luyten V’s Dynaspike, her most powerful weapon.

“I’m glad you like it. We’ll attach the Project: Birdbath prototype next, but first it requires some fine-tuning. That can wait, though. Let’s do some combat drills with the Devil Drill first—pardon the pun,” Sandage said. “First, we’ll test its penetrative power.”

Before Rose could reply, Luyten V rocked as the entire building shook. She adjusted Luyten V’s controls, keeping its balance. “What’s going on?” The building rumbled again, the sound of screeching metal echoing painfully. Was something trying to tear the hangar apart?

“It can’t be! Why here? Why now?” Cecilia said fretfully, her visage going pale.

“We’re under attack!” an operator said as she studied her monitor.

“What?!” Sandage said in alarm. “He can’t be attacking now! Why?”

To answer the LUVOLT agent’s worst fears, a section of the hangar’s ceiling tore away to reveal the nightmarish visage of Okab’s monstrous face. With a rumbling thud, he leaped from the roof, almost crushing several techs as they scurried away. With his towering height, Okab’s head scraped against the hangar ceiling as he lumbered forward.

“Perfect. It seems you’re already ready to begin,” Okab said, his monstrous mouth extending into a terrifying grin. “Let’s test that new toy of yours!” Not even finishing his sentence, the Altair general slashed out with an extended claw.

[outerspace-castaway]

so apparently a few years ago i made a list of random songs i liked

i dont remember why i did it and only just rediscovered it now but it makes me want to make another one so...

carousel - 5 seconds of summer

2. the night we met - lord huron

3. borderline - ed sheeran

4. time of the season - the zombies

5. 26 - paramore

6. fire - sara bareilles

7. the pretender - foo fighters

8. im gonna be (500 miles) - the proclaimers

9.frankenstein - rina sawayama

10. amused - hunger

11. swing swing - all american rejects

12. street lightning - the summer set

13. always you - louis tomlinson

14. one life - hedley

15. sexual - neiked

16. let me love you - mario

17. 3am - haim

18. my tears ricochet - taylor swift

19. somewhere only we know - keane

20. be kind - halsey

21. skyway avenue - we the kings

22. next to me - emeli sande

23. lifetime - justin bieber

24. shapeshifter - alessia cara

25. slow motion - charolatte lawrence

26. new angel - niall horan

27. heart of glass - blondie

28. angels like you - miley cyrus

29. teardrops - liam payne

30. freedom - jon batiste

31. these dreams - heart

32. tell me its over - avril lavigne

33. slow grenade - ellie goulding

34. never gonna not dance again - p!nk

35. symphony - clean bandit & zara larson

36. un nouveau soleil - m83

37. juke box hero - foreigner

38. saigon - luke hemmings

39. faith - calvin harris

40. infinity - one direction

41. wings - jonas brothers

42. river - myles smith

43. church - aly & aj

44. woman - kesha

45. i must not chase the boys - play

46. wonderful unknown - ingrid michaelson

47. better - syml

48. pink skies - lany

49. duality - set it off

50. you get what you give - new radicals

51. tounge tied - grouplove

52. ophelia - the lumineers

53. angel with a shotgun - the cab

54. werewolves of london - warren zevon

55. drive - incubus

56. alone - sleeping with sirens ft mgk

57. chainsaw - nick jonas

58. the hardest thing - 98 degrees

59. breathe (2am) - anna nalick

60. ocean avenue - yellow card

61. its about time - lillix

62. all or nothing - o town

63. you're the inspiration - chicago

64. all my life - k ci & jojo

65. are you happy now - michelle branch

66. shape of my heart - backstreet boys

67. show me love - robyn

[bongaboi]

Grand Canyon: 2023-24 Western Athletic Men's Basketball Champions

LAS VEGAS (AP) — Tyon Grant-Foster scored 22 points, Ray Harrison added 15 of his 19 in the second half and top-seeded Grand Canyon beat UT Arlington 89-74 Saturday night to win the Western Athletic Conference Tournament for the second consecutive season and clinch an automatic berth in the NCAA Tournament.

The Lopes have appeared five of the last six WAC Tournament title games, winning three of the last four.

Lok Wur scored 16 points and Jovan Blacksher Jr. 14 for Grand Canyon (29-4).

Phillip Russell led UT Arlington (20-14) with 22 points, including four 3-pointers. Shemar Wilson added 13 points and Akili Vining 10.

Harrison converted a three-point play and followed with two free throws to open the second half as Grand Canyon scored 14 of the first 21 points to open its biggest lead at 50-39 with 15 minutes to play. Brandyn Talbot answered with two free throws before Phillip Russell hit a 3 to trim the deficit to six points a minute later and made another from beyond the arc to make it 68-64 with 4 minutes remaining.

McGlothan answered with a monstrous two-hand dunk before Talbot hit another 3 to cut UTA's deficit to three points but Harrison hit two free throws and the Mavericks committed turnovers on their next two possessions and, each time, Grant-Foster hit two free throws before Harrison made a layup to cap an 8-0 run and make it 78-67 with 1:43 to go.

Moore threw down a fast-break dunk with 2.9 seconds left that stretched Grand Canyon's lead to 86-74 — the Lopes' biggest of the game. Russell, who apparently took umbrage with the play, seemed to intentionally bump Moore, who was then hit with the ball following a baseball pass by Vining. Moore was assessed a Flagrant-2 foul, Vining a technical foul and both players were ejected.

Derrick Michael Xzavierro, who didn't play for Grand Canyon, was also ejected for leaving the bench area.

UT Arlington shot 49% (25 of 51) from the field and limited the Lopes to just 40% (23 of 58) shooting but the Mavericks were outscored 37-14 from the free-throw line, where GCU attempted a Division-I program record 50 shots.

Grand Canyon scored 32 points off 26 Mavericks turnovers and committed 14, which UTA converted into just 11 points.

No. 3 seed UT Arlington made its only NCAA Tournament appearance when the Mavericks won the 2008 Southland Conference Tournament. UTA joined the WAC prior to the 2022-23 season.