#hey while youre here. consider checking out my fics if you havent already ;)
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linzerj · 10 months ago
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20 Questions for Writers
I was tagged by @sinvulkt for this 20 Questions for Writers ask game!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
On AO3... i only have 12 currently. (On FFN however... I have 67 lol)
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
107,857
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Primarily Marvel nowadays, specifically Doctor Strange (MCU)! But I've also consistently written for Danny Phantom, and also delved into Pokemon, Teen Titans, TMNT, Warriors Cats and Twilight back in the day... its a lot lol.
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
Golden Gate's Heroes - a Venom and Ant-Man/MCU crossover from before NWH/Venom 2. It has 2,238 kudos as of posting!
Displaced Phantom - a DP and MCU crossover, 577 kudos
Stars Will Light the Way - What If...? Strange Supreme met America Chavez? The longest fic I've posted lol, 476 kudos
alive - an introspective look at Mewtwo, assuming the one from Detectice Pikachu is the same as the one from Pokémon: The First Movie, 420 kudos
through the multiverse - connected drabbles following the Guardians of the Multiverse from the first season of What If...? 329 kudos
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I try to! Sometimes I might not see it or forget to reply if I don't reply right away lol, but I love engagement on my fics and I always want to make sure I thank everyone for reading!
6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Uh. Hmm. I actually... don't know? Maybe one of my post-Infinity War pre-Endgame Doctor Strange fanfics, like Eidetic or death is an old friend? Just because they end with Infinity War and that was tbh a kinda angsty ending...  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Probably has to be Stars Will Light the Way, tbh. Most of my fics are fairly "happy" tbh but so many are oneshots and anthologies, that this seems like the best pick.
8. Do you get hate on your fic?
I've gotten maybe one "hate" comment, just telling me my pacing was too slow for their liking or something like that lol. But generally, my audience has been very nice!
9. Do you write smut?
Nope!
10. Do you write crossovers?
OH YEAH!! A good chunk of my old fanfics on FFN were crossovers lol. Actually my first several fics were all crossovers I'm pretty sure. I love a good crossover...
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I am aware of... and don't get any ideas folks!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Um... no, I don't think so!
13. Have you ever co-written a fic?
Nope!
14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?
Uhhhh.... hmmm.... its hard to say. I am very much a multishipper - I'll ship one guy with quite a few other characters if the dynamic could even conceivably work. But I also tend to prefer gen-fic or found family fics too...? But um. Uh. All-time favorite ship is probably Eddie/Venom. I will not elaborate further.
15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Gosh ok it's this Blue Beetle fic, with Jaime from the Young Justice cartoon swapping places with Jaime from the movie. I just... idk how I want to end it so it's been sitting on my laptop, mostly untouched since like. September or October of 2023. Whoops...
16. What’s your writing strengths?
Idk lol, um... getting into the heads of the characters I write?? I've been told that I can capture certain characters really well, at least.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
17. What’s your writing weaknesses?
Fight scenes can be a little tough for me to write... but also. I procrastinate on writing sometimes, and i'm terrible at planning fics out fully before i start them... so if I don't write scenes and ideas down, they're gone, and then I don't know what to write for my fic, and then the fic never gets finished 🙃
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
Eh, depends on the language - I took enough Spanish to be able to pull it off, I think, and I also have a few coworkers who speak Spanish fluently who will make sure I'm doing it right if/when I use it. Other than that, I'm not sure if I trust Google Translate enough to write dialogue in any other language...
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Omg... apparently... it was a crossover between Danny Phantom and Warriors (the books about the cats)... I figured it would be Danny Phantom but that. That is hilarious to me. I really was a Warriors Cats kid....
20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?
It's gotta be Stars Will Light the Way. Idk man, it just... it may not be as popular as Golden Gate's Heroes, but it's currently the longest fic I've ever written and published and FINISHED, and im so proud of that. The fact that even 400+ people liked it enough to give it a kudos... I wrote that fic for me, so to know others liked it too means the world to me.
I know you're supposed to tag people for these things, but. I always feel like I'm bothering people when I do. Even though some of my mutuals, I know y'all write fic... so if you see this and want to go for it, any of my mutuals or followers, go for it, consider yourself tagged!
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khaleesiofalicante · 3 years ago
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OK I GOT 5 HOURS OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT WHICH IS PRETTY OK IG (I did stay up to read the fic-) BOTH MY TESTS WENT LIKE SHIT, I HAD AN ANXIETY ATTACK IN PROGRAMMING CLASS BECAUSE BY TEACHER IS A LITTLE SHIT WHO KEPT ON YELLING AT ME WHEN I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND SOMETHING AND I SPENT LUNCH ALONE BUT AT LEAST NOW IM ALONE WITH MY LAPTOP SO YAYAYAYYA
first of all, this chapter right here is my comfort chapter from now on. i said what i said. I will be rereading it again and again just because i can. it was PERFECTION
here's me going crazy at 2 am yesterday.
MAGNUS' CHAPTER
LET'S GO LET'S GO LET'S GO
AHHHHHHH IT'S THEIR ANNIVERSARY
SCREAM
oh
alec shaved his beard because it made him look older
RAFAEL WAS SO UPSET AFTER THE MEXICO ATTACK BECAUSE OF ANJALI RIGHT??
magnus and alec are the oblivious parents istg
“Are you decent?” Max yelled. “I don’t want to be traumatized again.”
“Hey! We agreed not to talk about that!” Alec yelled back.
Im not even surprised at this point
“Happy anniversary, bapa!” Rafael kissed him on the cheek and handed him the flowers.
“Where are my flowers?” Alec asked.
Rafael plucked a rose from the bouquet and threw it at Alec. “Here you go.”
“Thanks, son,” Alec mumbled.
IM WHEEZING
DAVID BAKES
“David made it,” Max said shyly. "
Oh,” Alec replied and then shrugged. “Well, the icing could be a little sweeter I think.”
Ever since Max started dating, Alec had become incredibly protective. Alec liked David of course – it was impossible to find someone who didn’t. But that didn’t mean Alec approved.
And it didn’t help that the blond boy was absolutely terrified of Alec.
ALEC STOP TEASING HIM
THE BOY IS ALREADY SCARED
“I don’t know,” Alec analysed the card. “David used too much glitter.”
“Since when do you have a problem with excessive glitter?” Max demanded.
ALEC
“I didn’t use him!” Max huffed. “He was thoroughly compensated for his efforts!”
“Compensated how?” Alec asked.
“Uh,” Max said. “With donuts.”
when i saw donuts i immediately thought of rose and luisa from jtv
iykyk
but should i continue the show? i got tired of jane continuously embarrasing herself
“You expect us to follow rules?” Alec asked in surprise. “In our own home? On our anniversary?”
The warlock boy grinned wickedly before leaning close to Alec.
“You better do it, or I will tell everyone about your secret,” Max whispered.
Alec blinked at that.
the secret...
I DONT LIKE HOW MANY THINGS POPPED INTO MY HEAD
is highschool musical that bad? i havent watched it. should i?
what if i cried
i just wanna hug alec??? but i cant say it'll be ok because it wont
“Is that why you are not attending?” Magnus grinned at his friend. “Or is it because you are terrified of Georgia?”
“That child is the reincarnation of Christopher Lightwood!” Ragnor complained. “I heard she made explosives out of demon ichor! Who makes explosions out of demon ichor?”
RAGNOR IS PROBABLY GETTING FLASHBACKS
THESE STUPID FUCKING BITCHES
how tf do you think we have survived huh??
medicine that's how
vaccines, anti biotics and what not
stop being close-minded and fucking do it
ok i know the risk is great
BUT OTHERWISE THEY ALL DIE
it was different for warlocks. The Shadow World was their universe. The nephilim kept it safe. At one point in their lives, they had learned to coexist with them, out of necessity and out of obligation.
And now here they were – working together in the name of friendship and love.
how things change...
what
say what
the causes are what
ok let's not jump to conclusions
im fucking crying wtf
alec doesnt deserve this shit
all he's done is make the world a better place
hes worked so hard on this
RAZIEL CAN GO FUCK HIMSELF
what am i supposed to say to my parents if one of them comes to check on me and im sitting here crying at 2 am
He didn’t want to believe in a reality that would punish Alec. Alec who only wanted to do what is good and right.
Alec was who was losing his hope and strength every passing day. Alec who was struggling. Alec who was turning to desperate measures to cope with all the stress.
please alec
no please
THE ANGELS ARE BITCHES
Because if Magnus found out Raziel was the one causing all this pain for Alec, he would march up to heaven and set the bastard on fire himself.
AND I'LL GO WITH HIM
KNEW THE SPY WAS LIVVY
AWW RAGNOR LIKES SELENA THATS SO SWEET
blue and gold
STOP IT IM CRYING AGAIN
The shadowhunter was a good influence on him. Magnus hoped Alec would see it sooner rather than later.
HUH
HUHU
HUH
omg
GIGI GETTING A SIBLING
“Max isn’t allowed to do a lot of things,” Magnus chuckled. “But he does them anyway.”
thats my boi
GASP
]THE NECKLACE
rafael is growing into the consul voice
they grow up so fast
nope nope he's still the little 5 year old
voice cracking what do you mean he's 20
im glad hes happy with mila. or is he...?
Magnus had deduced as much. Alec lived in his beautifully oblivious world. But Magnus noticed.
He noticed the hickeys. He noticed the late-night visits. He noticed the tense phone calls.
well thank god there's at least one non-oblivious person (alec i love you so much but you are very very oblivious)
“What’s stopping you then?” Magnus asked.
"2554 miles,” Rafael chuckled sadly.
me with all my online friends
probably more miles
Magnus tried to do the math but promptly gave up.
me
But Alec did lie though. Magnus pushed the thought away.
NOT NOW
LET ME LIVE IN PEACEFUL OBLIVION
HUSH
“Except melt it?” Rafael chuckled.
“Yes,” Magnus chuckled back. “As you can see, the bar is extremely low in the Lightwood family.”
AHHIUCCDSKUHDCV
i have no clue what the words describing the outfit are
time to google
OK PRETTY
Fifteen years. Fifteen years of loving and Alec still made his heart stutter.
dont do this to me right now I WILL CRY
“What the hell?” Max exclaimed. “Why are you all dressed up?”
“In case you haven’t noticed, it’s my anniversary,” Alec chuckled.
Max-
Fifteen years. Fifteen years and Magnus still took Alec’s breath away.
HJCSDHJBJDHSGCDYGJVVC JHVDFYMJ
it's not funny MY EYES ARE WATERING
“Bapak is a good looking one in the family,” Rafael pointed out. “You are the chaotic one and I am the smart one.”
“What am I then?” Alec asked dryly. “A sack of potatoes?”
“You’re the sexy one,” Magnus grinned. “A sexy sack of potatoes.”
yes.
Alec grinned back and leaned forward. Magnus put his hands around Alec’s neck and kissed him. He kissed Alec with all the love he had inside his heart.
Just like the first time. Just like the hundredth time. Just like the thousandth time.
Because with Alec, every kiss mattered. Every single one.
muffled sob
“Stop making out, oh my god!” Max groaned.
Magnus sensed a pillow coming their way but Rafael caught it before it hit them.
“Max, stop!” Rafael scolded. “You will wrinkle dad’s suit and ruin bapak’s hair! I spent hours ironing both!”
why is max me when i see people display affection in front of me
ALSO RAFAEL HKUIUIDCSKIHUDFVHJDFVHU
“They are here,” Rafael said. “You two better look exactly the way you did when I left with Max or I will raise hell.”
IM SCREAMING
Selena was wearing a blue crop top with the words “MIND YOUR OWN UTEREUS” written in gold.
i need that top
DAVID'S SHIRT IS THE COLOR OF MAX'S MAGIC
AHH ISABELLE DOESNT KNOW SHE'S PREGNANT YET
The argument of “who gave the best gift” had started when Jace and Izzy had gotten drunk on vodka. It didn’t help that Alec had gotten drunk as well. All three Lightwood siblings had then proceeded to have an argument about who had the best spouse. The whole night had been drunken chaos. Magnus, Clary and Simon had let them have it since the Lightwood siblings had a tendency to carry the world on their shoulders even when nobody asked them. They rarely ever let loose ever since their worlds had plunged into sickness and demon attacks. Especially Alec. So, Magnus had let his husband be that 18-year-old boy again. The boy who got drunk and fought with his siblings and sang songs about Magnus’ pretty eyes.
OH MY GOD THE CHAOS
Georgia considered that. “I’m not allowed to melt it, right?”
“No,” they all replied in chorus.
LET GIGI MELT IT
SELENA IM SO PROUD OF YOU
“Dad,” Max said. “Can you keep a picture of me wearing this necklace in your office?”
“Why?” Rafael asked.
“I think it will piss off the boomers,” Max giggled.
“Nice!” Lexi grinned. “A downworlder wearing a shadowhunter heirloom? They will lose their heads. Uncle Alec, you must do it.”
“I will do you one better. I will hang a tapestry,” Alec chuckled.
YASSS I CANT WAIT FOR THE SHADOWHUNTERS TO BE PISSED
AWW THEY DIDNT KNOW THE NECKLACE USED TO BELONG TO MAGNUS
he actually gave to camille first-
Why couldn’t this boy just cause chaos during his travel year like the rest of them? Why did he actually study and do his research as recommended?
why would you NOT study and research during your travel year????
oh shit
well well well
david bby stfu
i love you but pls stop speaking for all our sakes
“Holy shit,” Max said. “It is expensive then!”
“Don’t pawn the ruby!” Rafael warned.
MAX NO-
OH THE STONE COMES FROM EDOM
oh no
pls dont fight
oh so i was wrong about magus confronting him from that snippet
all you need to know is im sobbing right now and grammarly is the only thing making this coherent
dont mind me just
NO I FORGOT ABOUT MAX AND DAVID
GET BACK IN THE ROOM YOU IDIOTS
don't do this to me at 3 am
OK THE DILF PART
thank you for adding light into my life again
(me while editing this: today really isn't my day huh? i just slipped in rainwater outside my balcony because I heard rain and ran there. now my knee and back hurt and I think I sprained (?) my toe-
ANYWAY
wait im gonna go check out the rain and then continue editing this
ok i got bored of the rain)
that made me laugh through my tears
“Objectively good looking?” Jace snorted. “Excuse you, but my parabatai is smoking hot! He is a freaking prize, okay? If we had a magazine for hot shadowhunters, you would be on the cover page. Every single issue.”
“Okay, that’s enough!” Alec interrupted. “Magnus, are you happy? Now all my friends have told me I am pretty.”
“I said smoking hot,” Jace corrected.
“We are not being biased,” Clary pointed out. “It is the general consensus, Alec.”
“It’s true,” Lexi said. “So many people have asked me for your number, Uncle Alec. And I would have given it to them if I wasn’t worried about being turned into a marshmallow.”
LEXI DUHDUGHUDFCUHKVDFUIKFDU
“Dad, I don’t know why you are so worried,” Max said in a bored tone. “You’re a told DILF.”
David choked on his champagne and Jace patted him on the back.
“What the hell is a DILF?” Alec demanded.
“Oh, I know this one!” Jace said excitedly. “It means Dashing and Irresistible Looking Father. Max is right, you are a total DILF.”
“Mr. Herondale-” David raised a hand.
“I heard one of the shadowhunters in their travel year calling me a DILF too,” Jace said proudly.
THAT IS NOT WHAT DILF MEANS OH MY GOD
“It’s not a rumour,” Selena spoke up and passed her phone. “There is a group chat at Scholomance just to thirst after you.”
add me to it
ALL THE COMMENTS I CANT BREATHE
“Alec Lightwood can run me over with a Maserati and I would thank him.”
“Give me that,” Izzy grabbed the phone and started giggling. “Petition for Consul Alec Lightwood-Bane to stab me with his mortal sword.”
“Isabelle!” Alec hissed, cheeks flaming. “Stop it!”
“I want one!” Jace grabbed the phone now. “By the Angel!”
“Read it!” the kids yelled in chorus.
“I would gladly let Consul Lightwood-Bane inspect my mortal instruments,” Jace chuckled and threw the phone at David.
David shook his head vehemently and threw it at Max.
“My body is just a hole for Alec Lightwood,” Max read out loud and started laughing so hard that he fell off his chair.
Lexi grabbed the phone and giggled. “I want the Consul to strip off my runes among other things.”
She passed the phone to Gigi, who looked at the phone and look at Alec.
“Uncle Alec,” the girl said. “This person wants you to crush them with your massive archer arms.”
“Give me that,” Rafael grabbed it now. “Aw, this one is a classic, dad. Alec Lightwood turned me gay.”
He threw the phone at Simon, who stared the screen and looked up. “Uh, I don’t think I can read this one out loud in front of the kids.
“Is this the one about the basement?” Selena chuckled and Simon nodded.
WHAT'S THE BASEMENT ONe
TELL ME
AWW GIGI AND LEXI PUTTING MAKEUP ON DAVID AND MAX RECORDING IT
google translator time
oooo Rafael's gonna talk with Mila
Magnus you're such a good father
seriously
“Sometimes things are just sad. So, you need to let yourself be sad.”
YES
SAY IT LOUDER
THEY ARE UNDER THE BED
AHHH MAX AND DAVID
DAVID CALLED HIM MY ANGEL IN FRENCH
Alec and Magnus hiding under the bed and spying on them is just-
Jace had tried to give Max the shovel talk and had gotten a little too emotional.
of course, he did smh I love him so much
“David doesn’t need a shovel talk,” Alec smiled. “He knows what would happen to him if he hurts my son.”
David gulped. “You will throw me into the silent city?”
“I will ask me husband to portal you to hell,” Alec said – Consul Voice. “We have relatives there.”
the beloved relatives yes
“Goodnight,” Jace gave them a salute. “Have fun inspecting Magnus’ mortal instruments.”
JACE
OH SO THE QUESTION WAS ABOUT SMOKING
damn it
oh my god guys he said he'll stop smoking
just lemme have this moment
my boy's lungs will be intact
HIS LUNGS WILL BE OK
“I can’t wait to see all the messages on the chat after that,” Magnus giggled.
Alec looked up. “I’m more than a tall glass of water, Magnus!”
SCREAMING
In his dream, he saw them again. But they weren’t smiling this time.
what
wait
THE PROPHETIC DREAMS
nope nope nope
Nah I don't know what you're talking about
haha
damn, I think I really hurt my back...
OK BUT THE IMMORTALITY ANGST???? WAS SO SO GOOD???? I know it makes me cry but is it bad that I'm always so excited for angst written by you because of HOW GOOD it is????
"When I die I will love you from my grave" I NEED THIS ON MY FOREHEAD OH MY GOD I LOVE THESE TWO SO SO MUCH
alright I need to get something for my back and my knee (I'm home alone so this will be fun)
OK, I THINK THE NEXT CHP WILL BE ANJALI'S POV I JUST FEEL IT!!! I miss my girl so much I hope she's doing ok. Jaime too...
I'm rereading all of these chapters after chapter 10 because why not. Bye!!
OKAY I AM GLAD YOU LIKED IT BUT I AM ALSO DEEPLY WORRIED ABOUT YOUR HEALTH.
I hope your knee and back feels better soon!
also fuck that teacher yelling something doesn't make people understand it any better ugh dumb piece of shit anyway screw that person.
I hope you get some good rest and recovery from this rollercoaster of a day.
Take care!
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gumnut-logic · 6 years ago
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Gentle Rain (Part Nineteen)
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Title: Gentle Rain
Warm Rain Series
Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen | Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen | Part Nineteen
Author: Gumnut
1 – 4 Mar 2019
Fandom: Thunderbirds Are Go 2015/ Thunderbirds TOS
Rating: Teen
Summary: Sometimes it is so gentle, you don’t realise it is happening.
Word count: 3000
Spoilers & warnings: Virgil/Kayo, Scott/OC, Gordon/Penelope, spoilers for Warm Rain up to this point in the timeline.
Timeline: Six months after ‘The Proposal’, almost a sequel.
Author’s note: For @scribbles97 And here we are, the last chapter. There will be an Epilogue full of important stuff, I’ve started it. Also, those of you who follow me on Tumblr will have already read the first Tale of Gentle Rain – I kinda jumped the gun and didn’t want to officially publish it until I had finished this fic…which is pretty close now. So, there is more to come. Thank you ever so much to @scribbles97 who has helped me through this entire fic. Also thanks to @i-am-chidorixblossom and @the-lady-razorsharp who have also answered my frantic calls at various points in time – this fic was a nerve-wracker and I can be really insecure at times :D I would also like to give a massive thanks to all of you who have cheered me along the way. Your comments and feedback have kept me going. It makes it so much more purposeful to write if I know what I’m writing is being read and super bonus if it is being enjoyed. Thank you so, so much ::hugs you all madly::
Disclaimer: Mine? You’ve got to be kidding. Money? Don’t have any, don’t bother.
-o-o-o-
Waking in hospital was not her favourite. She had done it many times in her thirty years and none of those events had been pleasant.
She could smell the hospital around her.
A frown. Vague memories of faces, words, it seemed like dreams, all leading back to that man from International Rescue.
A pair of blue eyes.
Scott Tracy.
She woke with his name on her lips.
And he was the first thing she saw.
“Em?” His voice was soft, tentative, and the hope in his face so strong.
“Hey.”
“Hey, yourself.” That smile of his still turned her insides to jelly. “How are you feeling?”
How was she feeling? A quick physical check and she found herself surprisingly good. “Good. I’m good.”
His smile widened.
A snuffled snort echoed through the room. She frowned. “What?”
Scott stepped back and she came eye to eye with Kayo sitting on a couch in the corner. The smirk on her face was amusing, particularly considering the man asleep in her lap. Virgil was snoring softly, curled up rather awkwardly on the too small sofa, still in his uniform. His baldric and toolkit were draped over the back of one of the chairs.
“Is he okay?”
Scott’s smile was reassuring. “He’s fine. Just tired. Stubborn idiot refused to go home.”
“Why?”
He frowned and she realised that he, too, was still in his uniform. “You don’t remember?”
Remember? A blink. “You caught me.”
“Yes, I did. But you were injured.”
Injured? Her brain didn’t seem to be functioning at full capacity. “How?”
His brow furrowed immediately. “You had a laceration on your leg. You lost a lot of blood.”
“I did?” She reached down and peered under the covers. Her left stump was swathed in bandages. Another frown and she forced her mind to think.
Scott speaking to her calmly, but firmly. Strapping her in. She had flown in a Thunderbird. Thunderbird One. Thunder was right. It had roared. So, so fast.
Then the hospital. Perth Hospital. Again.
Scott holding her. Her blood on his hands.
Worried blue eyes.
She shook herself. She must be on something. She was foggy.
“The bridge? The people?”
“We saved as many as we could.”
Virgil snorted again.
She frowned at the man as Kayo stroked his hair. A glance at Scott. “Why are you here?”
His eyes widened and his expression closed suddenly and considering their recent history she realised exactly how that might have sounded.
A blink. “No, you idiot. I’m talking about the broken arm, leg and ribs, not to mention the hole in your side that was stitched up a few weeks before Christmas.”
“Uh.” Now he looked uncomfortable, almost like a young boy who had just discovered he was in trouble.
Her foggy mind still wasn’t registering properly, but it still managed to calculate recovery times. She rubbed her eyes. “And what about Virgil? You know, the man who recently died.” In the corner of her eye she saw Kayo tense.
“It was necessary.” His stance straightened. “Besides, we had backup.”
“I noticed. But that didn’t seem to exclude either of you from the rescue.”
“There wasn’t time-“
“Exactly! You haven’t given either of yourselves enough time!”
Those blue eyes flared. “And what exactly did you expect me to do? Sit back while you fell off a bridge?”
And there it was, the blatant self-sacrifice that was going to kill these men. “You had back up! Let them do their job. Stop risking yourself.”
“I couldn’t leave you there.” It was quiet, but the words were firm.
She stared at him. “Your health is worth the risk, Scott.”
“Yours isn’t.” He glared at her. “I will not risk you.”
“Me? What about the other hundred or so people?”
His lips shut closed and he didn’t answer. Blue simply stared at her.
Her eyes widened. “You didn’t...”
“How could I not?” And suddenly he was so much closer.
“Oh, for goodness sake, kiss her already!” There was a thump and a groan, and they both looked up to see Virgil rolling off the couch. The man was obviously stiff as a board. “Have at it, I’m getting coffee.” And without a glance at them, he stumbled from the room, dragging Kayo with him. Kayo did grin back at both of them, however, her eyes sparkling.
Em frowned. “Are you sure he’s okay?”
Scott smiled. Oh god, that smile. “I thought you’d be familiar with Virgil Sans Coffee by now.” But he was leaning in and that smile touched her lips. As always, he was warm, his energy burning, reaching out and drawing her in. A brush of his tongue on hers and he released her. She didn’t want to let him go.
His smile became hesitant. “I believe I owe you an explanation.”
“Regarding your habit of flashing hot and cold?” God, honestly, she only wanted him to kiss her again. His hot was so hot. Screw it. “I’ve just had a major traumatic incident. I’m injured, and I’m pretty sure I’m high on pain meds. Can we save it for later? I’d really just like to you to kiss me again.”
His grin was as gorgeous as his smile, and god, when he wrapped his arms around her and took her lips with his, all the cares in the world could wait until later.
-o-o-o-
Em was only in the hospital for a few days, but in that time, she managed to have every Tracy march through her door plus Kayo and her uncle.
Uncle Crispin arrived with Sally Tracy along with Alan. Alan was looking a little green around the gills and the description he gave Kayo of what her uncle and his grandmother had been doing on the plane was enough to turn Em a little green in sympathy.
There were some things that you just didn’t want to know about the generations above you.
Uncle Crispin gave her the third degree on what had happened. This was quickly followed by him cornering Scott the moment he walked through her door on the way back from a meeting with the GDF.
“And what are your intentions with my niece, Tracy?”
“Kip!”
“Uncle Crispin!”
It was hard to tell who was more offended, Mrs Tracy or Em.
But Scott didn’t back down. He took a step towards her uncle and looked him in the eye. And he could. Not having seen Scott standing to his full height, Em hadn’t realised he was that tall. Though slimmer in youth, he could match every one of her uncle’s many inches. Wow. “And what are your intentions with my Grandmother?”
“Scott!” Okay, Mrs Tracy was the more offended.
Em glared at the both of them. “If you two gentlemen do not stop alpha strutting in my hospital room, I will ask both of you to leave.”
Scott’s response was immediate, probably feeling like he was already on probation and didn’t want to blow it. He backed down, but she didn’t fail to notice that he stepped immediately to her side. She rolled her eyes at that.
Uncle Crispin glared at him, but also backed off, stepping back beside Mrs Tracy.
“Now, Uncle Crispin, this is my business. While I appreciate your protectiveness, I find it rather ironic that you are attempting to protect me from the grandson of your paramour, and the leader of International Rescue, an organisation you greatly admire. You have a model Thunderbird and figurines, for crying out loud.” She turned to Scott, whose eyes were bugging out a little at her last statement. “And you, give your grandmother a break. Uncle Crispin is a great guy, I can promise you that. Stop snarling at him.”
Neither man commented, merely exchanging wary glances. God, men!
The tableau was interrupted by Virgil waltzing in with a get-well balloon tied to a blue teddy bear. Every face in the room turned to him. He stopped in his tracks and blinked. “Did I interrupt something?”
Em couldn’t help but smile. “No, nothing of importance.”
His eyes darted back and forth between his eldest brother, Uncle Crispin, Em and Kayo. “Okay, good, because Scott bought you a get-well bear.” He strode up and plonked it on the edge of her bed.
“I did?”
Kayo elbowed her brother. “Yes, you did, because that is what good boyfriends do when their girlfriends are in the hospital.”
There was a silence for a moment and Em stared at Virgil. The engineer smiled at her.
“Yes. Yes, I did and I do.” Scott said the words, but looked a little stunned.
Em bit her lip, but couldn’t help grinning at his expression. She picked up the bear. It had blue eyes and a perpetual smile. Reaching out a hand, she snagged Scott’s and pulled him towards her. “Thank you, Scott. It was a very kind thought.” And she was grinning up at him.
He rolled his eyes. “You’re welcome.”
“Can I give you a thank you kiss?”
She couldn’t help but grin at the grin that immediately split his face. He bent down and, oh, oh, thank you. Thank you, indeed.
The bear was dropped to the bed covers and one hand was in his hair, the other on his shoulder feeling the flex of muscle through his shirt.
“My god, I’m surrounded by a bunch of lovebirds. Okay, that’s it, I’m making a point of being somewhere else for some time. Em, get better soon. Enjoy...my brother.”
Scott broke off their kiss just in time for her to see Alan shudder. Mrs Tracy grabbed the youngest before he could escape and said something quietly to him Em couldn’t hear before kissing his cheek. Alan rolled his eyes and stomped out of the room.
Em had a grip on Scott’s shirt and didn’t want to let go. Virgil was grinning ear to ear. Kayo had a smirk on her face. Mrs Tracy was smiling. Uncle Crispin, surprisingly, wasn’t glaring, but was thoughtful instead.
Scott was staring down at her in amazement.
She grinned. “Can I say thank you again?”
Virgil cracked up laughing.
-o-o-o-
Escaping from hospital did not equate to escaping from the Tracys. Kayo, despite being heavily involved into the investigation surrounding the bridge bombing, found the time to accompany her back to her apartment. Virgil had declared her hoverscoot deceased and promptly acquired her a new one. Her protest at the cost was met with a flat-eyed stare, and yeah, billionaires, money no object, yada-yada-yada.
It was a relief to slip back into a hoverscoot. The hoverchair from the hospital was just clunky and cumbersome.
While Virgil packed the car, she took the opportunity to sit down with Kayo for a moment in her own loungeroom. “I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I can’t believe...” And she ran out of words.
“Em...” Kayo held up her hand. “Trust me, we are equal on all scores.” Virgil stuck his head in the door and grabbed two more of the small bags she had hastily packed and disappeared again. Kayo smiled just a little, her voice quiet as she stared after him. “We’re equal.”
“If there is ever anything I can do for either of you. Just ask.” She reached out and grabbed the woman’s hand. “Please.” She tried her best to covey how much it all meant to her.
Kayo turned to her and tilted her head a little. “If you do the same.” A small smile. “I hear rumour that is what friends do.”
Em couldn’t help but grin just a little. She felt like a teenager swapping friendship bracelets. The thought was just ridiculous.
But it meant so much more.
“Oh, I’ve got something for you.” Kayo reached into her pocket. “You should keep this on you at all times until Brains can set you up with something a little less conspicuous.” The security officer handed her the IR comm she had worn in New Zealand.
Em stared at it. “Are you sure?”
Kayo arched an eyebrow. “I’m sure.”
Em held it in her hands, the embossed IR logo catching the light. “That is something I’ve been meaning to ask. I left this behind in Wellington. How did you know I was on the bridge?”
“I planted a tracker in your hoverscoot.” There was no apology in Kayo’s expression.
Em stared at her. “What?”
“You became an IR concern. I needed to know where you were.”
“Why?”
“We are primarily a rescue organisation. However, our technologies are advanced and there are people out there who will do anything to get their hands on them. You know this, it has already affected your life drastically.”
“You think they might use me to get to you?”
Kayo shrugged. “Maybe. Possibly. There are a range of vulnerabilities in the equation. The tracker was to protect you and IR. In this case, we knew you were on the bridge and could act accordingly.”
“Is that what happened? Were they after me?” Her heart stuttered at the thought. To be honest, she had already considered some of the dangers involved. It was obvious. She had lost her family to a man who had wanted what the Tracys had.
Something flashed in Kayo’s eyes.
“No, a group has claimed responsibility. Lunatics. Don’t worry. Penelope and I are working on it. We’ll find them.” And Kayo stopped there, obviously unwilling to reveal anymore.
Her apartment door opened again and Virgil walked back in. “Anything else? I think I’ve about covered my rehab for today.”
Em mentally shook herself and smiled.
-o-o-o-
The stop at her apartment was exactly that, just a stop. She needed assistance and the doctors had only released her with the reassurance that she would have company.
So, bags packed and loaded, Kayo flew her back to Tracy Island, and she found herself in the same room she had spent Christmas. Cecil arrived to attend to her every need. The man was a like a clone of Gordon Tracy, though taller and skinnier. A ray of sunshine who never stopped smiling.
Scott bounced back and forth from the island every day, horribly busy, both with the GDF and the Thunderchick squads. Then a tsunami in Japan took every hand IR had available.
All the brothers came back from that pale and dead-eyed.
She caught him before he could escape to his room.
Even though she was prepared for it, it still hurt when he brushed her off. “Em, I’m tired. It’s been a long day. You should be resting.” His natural reflex was to lock it all up and process it alone, the same way he had when Virgil collapsed.
She hadn’t missed Virgil beelining to Kayo. Hadn’t missed her wrapping her arms around him, his head dropping to her shoulder in pure exhaustion. Her leading him away to their quarters.
Scott had glanced at them while removing his baldric and dumping it on the couch before throwing himself down beside it.
She steeled herself. “I’m fine. It is you who needs the rest.”
He looked up at her and the exhaustion and pain in his eyes broke her heart. Reaching out, she ‘scooted forward, dropping the ‘scoot directly onto the couch and took him into her arms, lying his head on her chest.
He resisted at first, his muscles tense, and she was forced to wonder how long it had been since this man had been comforted. She knew a good percentage of his history, had seen the care he doled out to his family, but who cared for the carer? Virgil, most certainly, but he would ever be younger.
Em would ever be older.
She pulled him tighter, running her fingers through his hair, and slowly his arms crept around her and returned the embrace. He didn’t fully relax, no doubt that would take time, but his breathing evened out and he rested his weight on her.
“I love you.” The words came out unbidden. She didn’t mean to say it, but it was said.
His reaction was immediate. He sat up, pulling away a little and staring at her.
Em felt the blood drain from her face. “I’m sorry, I-“
And he was kissing her, his strength pulling her close. His tongue begged entry and she let him in, as he crushed her against him. His cologne was overlaid with sweat and dirt, he desperately needed a shower and a shave, but he was in her arms and loving her in his own way.
She didn’t expect the words, not yet. If there was one thing she had learnt over the last few months, it was that Scott Tracy had a large family, but ultimately, he had been alone for a long time. As alone as she had been.
It was going to take time.
The kiss broke off, his breathing heavy, eyes glistening in the evening light. “Em...”
She reached up and placed a finger across his lips. “You don’t have to say anything.” He kissed her finger, his breath hot on her skin. “I will only ask you for one thing.”
His eyes widened in an expression very similar to the last time she had made such a demand of him.
“Ping me. Come to me. Seek me out.” Her fingers drifted into his hair and she leant forward to kiss his forehead. “I’m here. You are not alone. You don’t have to say anything, I won’t force you to talk, I promise. Just be...with me.”
It was all she could ask.
He stared at her for a moment, words bouncing about his eyes, but none finding his mouth. Eventually he drew her into his embrace, a soft kiss to her jaw, her cheek and her lips. There was no smile, no charm, no Commander of International Rescue, no big brother.
Just Scott Tracy.
He dropped his head to her shoulder, exhaustion in every line of his body. Em stroked his hair and just held on.
-o-o-o-
FIN.
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runningwitches · 7 years ago
Text
Loved
Summary: The reader is sad because they feel useless. Steve makes sure they know that’s not true and the party cheers them the heck up.
Request?: Nah M8 I’m just sad as heck
Word Count: 1819
A/N: i mean, seasonal depression and a neverending fear that nobody will ever love me and that I will die alone drove me to binge read a shit ton of steve harrington x reader fics and cry despite the fact that i havent finished season two of stranger things but im gonna write this anyways.
i guess this is steve x reader but thats not the main point of the story
idfk i just want to be loved
(umm, henderson! reader who is loved by everyone, i do not give a shit if this follows the exact storyline, ok? i just wanna be happy again) (also i do not look anything like a henderson! so reader can be adopted or some shit? maybe a cousin?  who tf knoes? not me, thats for sure !!
Warnings: Probably Season Two Spoilers, No Editing, Probably super OOC and all that because I started this at almost three in the morning and now its four and I’m exhausted but I cant sleep because I’m sad. Anyways I’m just trying to say that it’s bad but I’ll love you if you read it anyways.
I was curled up in my bed, isolating myself from everyone as per usual. After the events with the mind flayer and demodogs and upside down, I realized something pretty depressing. Nobody needed me. I mean like? Sure I was Dustin’s sister. And sure, I was kinda helpful in saving Steve’s ass from the demodogs and Billy, but it just feels as if I weren’t there, nobody would even notice. As if my presence had no positive value to anyone in The Party™.
So instead of socializing with them while they all played DnD and joked around, I sat myself in my room, wrapped in a blanket burrito, holding back tears. I had my music on in the background as I mindlessly flipped through one of the magazines my mom had bought for me. Everyone was downstairs as it was Dustin’s turn to host the DnD night, and everyone was over. I mean, Dustin, Mike, Lucas, Will, El, Max, Steve, Nancy, and Jonathan, and I definitely wouldn’t be surprised if I walked downstairs to find Joyce and Hopper there too. Every once in awhile I would hear some loud laughter come up from the group, signifying how happy they were without me there. It definitely wasn’t easy for me to sit there by myself staring blankly at the pictures of celebrities I didn’t even care about, but I continued to tell myself that they would be happier without me, attempting to drown out the sounds of their joy with the mixtape I had made for myself a little while back.
As I closed my eyes, focusing on my breathing, trying to force the tears that had started to pool back into my eyes, I heard someone knocking on my door. I quickly wiped my eyes to ensure there weren’t any stray tears, pulled the blanket tighter around my body, and attempted to look miserable. But miserable in a sick way and not in a sad way. If it were anybody except Dustin or Steve, I knew I was going to be able to pull off the “I’m not feeling very well” charade, so my chances were pretty good (though odds were rarely skewed in my favor).
Of course with my luck my little brother came bursting through the door.
“(Y/N)! Why aren’t you down there playing DnD with us?!” he asked, voice booming loud enough for the entire neighborhood to hear. As I prepared to try my excuse with him to see if my acting skills had gotten any better, I noticed someone else walking through the door. Looking up, my watery eyes met the concerned look on Steve’s face.
“Hey shithead, stop screaming. You don’t need to tell everyone in Hawkins about your sister’s lack of participation in game night,” he said to Dustin, ruffling his hair and then muttering for him to go back downstairs. Dustin looked angrily at Steve for a moment before looking between us for a second, muttered something to himself, and then left the room, surprisingly closing my door as he left.
“What’s up with you lately? It’s not like you to miss game night, but you haven’t been to a single one these past few weeks.”
“I’m just not feeling well, Steve, don’t worry about it,” I told him, looking down at the magazine in my lap and trying to will the tears away.
“Don’t try that bullshit with me, (Y/N). I know you better than that, do you really think I’d believe that crap?”
“There’s no bullshit to be had Steve, just go back downstairs, I’ll be fine,” I told him, yet I still refused to make eye contact. So when he sat down on the edge of my bed, put two fingers under my chin, and lifted my head up in order for me to make eye contact, I saw his face immediately soften.
“I’m not gonna go back downstairs until I figure out what’s wrong with my favorite girl.”
It took all of the resolve in the world for me to not break down at those two words, and it still didn’t even work. “Favorite girl?” I repeated, but only in my own head. “There’s no way I’m his favorite girl, he’s lying to me. Everyone always lies to me” I told myself. And in that second it was like the dam was broken. The tears started to fall freely from my face. I curled myself into more of a ball than I already was, which was a surprising feat of human flexibility, if I’m being completely honest. Steve’s arms immediately went around me, pulling us closer to each other, and practically pulling me into his lap.
I didn’t say a word as he stroked my hair and shushed me softly, I simply let out a series of what I would consider disgusting sobs.
He continued whispering to me, little things telling me that I’d be okay, or that he was there for me, or that everything was gonna be fine. As my breathing finally evened out, he hadn’t asked me what was wrong like I had expected, so I knew I had to speak up.
“Why are you even here, Harrington?” I asked him bitterly.
“What do you mean?” he replied, exasperated.
“Why do you even care about me?” I reiterated with a sniffle.
“Why do I care about you? (Y/N) what are you on about? It would take me ages to list all of that back to you.” I didn’t respond, but I allowed myself to relax a bit, leaning now onto his chest instead of holding myself as far away as I could while somehow still being in his lap. “(Y/N) you’re wonderful. You care so much about all of the kids, sometimes I think you out-mom even their own mom’s.” That was greeted with a sharp exhale from my nose which was (correctly) interpreted as a laugh. “You’re fucking badass. You can use a gun, a bat, a hockey stick, and pretty much anything else you can get your hands on to slay monsters, like real life monsters.” He checked my face after this comment, and was lucky he did, because he almost missed the slight curl of my lips. “You never let anybody get in the way of doing what needs to be done. Not even racist douchebags that show up and kick my ass. And you certainly don’t take shit from anyone.” A few more tears fell from my eyes, but he grabbed my face and used his thumbs to wipe them away, looking into my eyes. “And you’ve got a whole group of teenagers sitting down there worried sick about you because you mean so much to all of them.”
I sniffled again and threw my arms around his neck, whispering an almost inaudible, “Thank you.”
“Of course, sweetheart. Now let’s go get you cleaned up so we can finish that game of DnD.” I almost blushed at the pet name he gave me, if he didn’t sweep me up into his arms and carry me to the bathroom so I could rinse my face off. He made sure to grab my blanket from my bed and grabbed my hand to lead me down the stairs.
“Wow, it’s so nice of you to join us,” Dustin said the second we were down the stairs, his voice dripping with sarcasm. Steve shot him a look that said, “shut up or I’ll kill you,” while I just gave him a small smile. Before I even got settled on the couch I was smothered by two bear hugs.
“I missed you (Y/N),” El told me, gripping me in probably the tightest hug I’ve ever had. “You were gone for three weeks!”
“Yeah dude! Don’t leave us alone with these losers for that long ever again!” Max exclaimed, hugging me almost as tight as El was.
I smiled down at both of them, hugging them back just as fiercely. Looking up, I saw the smile Steve had on, but I ignored it in favor of the smiles on my girls’ faces. Ruffling their hair, I removed myself from their grips and went to sit on the couch between Steve and Nancy.
“It’s a good thing you came back (Y/N). I almost killed your brother, and not in the campaign, in real life. I’m pretty sure you’d be the only one who could stop me.” I chuckled to myself and then smiled at Lucas.
“It’s a good thing that I’m back then, huh?”
Will looked up at me this time, “Definitely! I was waiting for you to come down so I could show you this drawing!” I smiled down at him, glancing briefly at Jonathan, only enough to recognize the immense pride on his face at the fact that Will was genuinely happy and smiley. He brought it up to show me a picture that he had drawn of me fighting a monster, a cute little label that pertained to my name at the top. “Steve said you fought a monster and won! And I didn’t even get to see it. So I thought I’d draw it out for you.”
“I love it Will!” I exclaimed, pulling him into a hug and looking at the drawing again. It wasn’t until this second look that I noticed a label by the monster’s head as well. It simply read, “Billy” with a little arrow to indicate that the monster I was beating up was named Billy. I laughed at the naming of the monster and pulled Will into another hug, pressing a light kiss to the top of his head. He grabbed the drawing and placed himself back into his spot.
“(Y/N), you want to hop in on this campaign? We’ve still got a while left to go and we’re in a pretty good spot to add another character?” Mike offered, as he was playing Dungeon Master.
“Yeah, come on (Y/N)! You haven’t actually played in forever!” Dustin added.
The rest of the group added their own chorus of “Yeah”s to try and convince you to join.
“Okay, I guess. But only if I get to be a healer! I’m tired of killing the monsters,” I joked, earning a laugh from everyone in the room.
“Okay, okay, so the group walks up to the tavern in town, hoping for a nice evening away from the fighting for once. But the open the door and see, A MOM, not just A mom, it’s their mom!”
“What?” El asked.
“Mike what are you on about?” Lucas added.
“OH MY GOD, (Y/N)’S GONNA BE LIKE OUR TEAM’S MOM!” Max shouted in realization. The whole group looked at Mike in anticipation. “Well obviously, how else would I have gone about this? It’s perfect, and the perfect position to make her the healer.”
“I mean, technically she’s my sister,” Dustin announced, implying that you couldn’t be his mom.
“See (Y/N), I told you I was gonna kill him.”
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pwjins · 7 years ago
Text
one more time
summary: 3 months. it’d been 3 months since you’d last seen him. 3 months since butterflies fluttered in your stomach and lazy smiles spread across your face. 3 months since you’d last tasted anger and frustration on the tip of your tongue. there was no doubt you’d loved him and he loved you, but the forced smiles and feigned affection were too much for your fragile relationship.
member: kang daniel ♥ word count: 1.3k genre: angst but not really
a/n: hello!! this is heavily based off of the plotline this video by LeendaDProductions!! i’ve been so obsessed with her videos lately and you guys should really check her out if you haven’t already! p.s also i’m so sorry this was my first bullet fic and it’s basically a rly RLY bad physical form of my saltiness over the past week :-)  (i was too lazy to proofread it btw sry LMAO)
notice: some of the dialogue used in this are not fully my own, they’re credited to the video!
UPDATE: TUMBLR WAS BEING AN ASSHOLE SO THIS IS A REPOST ADHASK SRY 
Tumblr media
present day
you were lying on the couch, binge watching your favorite tv show for the 3rd time
and it was late ish, almost midnight and you were on the verge of knocking out
right when your eyes were about to fall shut, you heard knocking at your apartment door
you were considering to just ignore it and wait until tomorrow morning to worry about it because
who the fuck was trying to bother you at midnight
so you decide to just ignore it and pull the blanket over your head
but the knocking got louder and more consistent
and you were getting pissed off at this point
so you threw your blanket off and angrily went to go open the door, ready to deck whoever the hell was bothering you so late
you swung the door open about to scream at the person in front of you
but the second you locked stares with the person in front of you
your body instantly froze in fear and your voice caught in your throat
hands in his pockets, tousled hair, slightly thinner than the last time you saw him
kang daniel
3 months earlier
your hands hung by side, balled up into tight fists
while daniel stood across from you, arms crossed, eyes averting yours
“daniel, this is the 3rd god damn time this week, why does it always come to this?”
“y/n, can’t you see? we fucking argue over every little thing and then the next day we act like everything’s perfect”
“then why can’t you at least try, just try, to set things right again? i hate this and i know you hate it just as much as i do, so why can’t we at least try?” you groaned
he hated hurting you, getting hurt by you, but that was all that your relationship with him had eventually dwindled down to
“y/n, you know trying won’t get us anywhere. i can’t deal with this fucking toxic relationship”
he flinched at the realization of his words and wanted to take them back
but it was already too late
the damage had already been done
you froze in place, staring back at him with a mix of remorse, anger, and regret
over 2 years of wide smiles, goofy laughs, and loving glances was crumbling right in front of you
you wanted to scream at him, hit him, argue with him even more
but you know there’d be no point
he was already gone from you, and you from him
he sighed, dropping his gaze to the floor, walking towards the door
as he walked past you, he faintly mumbled, “we’re just incompatible” before continuing towards the door
you furrowed your eyebrows in discontent, turning back to grumble, “so that’s it?”
he stopped in his tracks, quietly turning his head back to meet your gaze
his eyes were now filled with regret and disappointment
you almost refused to believe they were the same ones that were lit with cheeriness and liveliness from when you first met
“that’s it.”
back to present day
“so why are you here?” you hesitantly questioned
“can’t i just came by to say hi?” he gruffly answered, inviting himself into your apartment, much to your dismay
you watched silently as he entered your living space, confused as to why he’d even bothered to come, especially at this time
finally tired of waiting for the silence to break, you asked, “if this is all you came here for, then you should probably leave”
that’s what you said, but truthfully, you missed his presence near you
you missed all of the awkward laughter, nervous grins, and flustering intimacy
beneath all of the arguments and fallouts in the past, he was still the guy that could make your stomach do somersaults with just a smile
he finally turned around and once he made eye contact with you
you felt your heart break again, the same way as it did before
he just continued to stare back, nervously rubbing the back of his head with his hand before saying, “uhh, this probably wasn’t the best time or place to say it, but i didn’t think we left off on the best note last time, and i’m sorry”
your mind flashbacked to all the screaming, arguing, crying, and pain induced by your arguments with him in the past
all the times you'd tried to pick up the broken pieces and keep everything together
only to have them fall apart again and again
you both had wanted to hold each other, love each other, care for each other even past all the arguments
but all of your touches eventually felt like burning stings that you both had to get away from
you could feel the heat rush to your cheeks and tears well up in your eyes, but you did your best not to show it
before you could say anything in return, he started you by letting out a low chuckle
you looked up at him in confusion to see him holding up one of his old, battered up sweatshirts
“remember the time i gave this to you?” he asked, looking slightly hopeful
looking at the sweatshirt sparked a fond memory– he’d urged you to go stargazing with him in the middle of the night
all was well until rain starting pouring over you both, soaking you as you ran along the sidewalks of the dark city, searching for shelter
“yeah, it was absolutely pouring that day and all our shoes and clothes were soaked” you replied
“and you were begging me to give you my clothes even though I was freezing too?” he smiled
“you're the one that wanted to hang out on that day, nice going there” you jokingly replied
you both chuckled and reflected back on the old, but cute memory, one of many
“hey, and remember the time…” he continued
nostalgia washed over you as past memories shared between the two of you resurfaced
all the times he’d be there for me and keep you smiling, and all the times you’d be there for him
despite the inkling of regret that came with each of the memories that you looked back on, you couldn’t help but wish to relive each and every one of those moments
you hadn't laughed or smiled that genuinely since the last time you'd seen him
he suddenly caught you off guard though, unconsciously wrapping his hand around yours, a habit he still hadn't grown out of
“i miss us, y/n” he quietly murmured, “i miss waking up to see you every morning, holding you, seeing you laugh– i miss it all”
you could see the sincere expression he bore earlier shrink into helpless frown
you smile slowly faded and you wanted to slip your hand out of his, but you couldn't find the strength to do so
“but both you and i know that we won't work out,” you sighed, dropping your head slightly in disappointment
his eyes fell to the floor in response, lightly nodding in reluctant agreement
“you should probably go soon, it’s getting late” you mumbled, mustering up any kind of excuse to get your mind away from him
because you already knew your feelings were already beginning to bubble up again
and you weren’t ready to rinse and repeat the pain from before
you wanted to stand up and slip your hand out of his, but his grip remained tight around your hand, pulling you back down near him
his voice was laced with sorrow and almost a hint desperation
“i can’t,” he simply said
“why?”
you wish you hadn’t asked, but at this point, it was already too late
he'd pulled you close to him, burying his face into your neck and cradling your head with his open hand
he held you close, his voice wavering as he spoke
“i think i’m still in love with you”
a/n: AND IF U HAVENT ALREADY, MAKE SURE TO GO VOTE FOR MY NEW URL!! IT’LL TAKE U 2 SECONDS I PRMISE :’)
https://goo.gl/forms/tqKY8CW8sr8M2b5T2
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